#220917 ib lb

[tellywoodtrash]

ishqbaaz 22.09.17 lb

not really feeling particularly witty or… anything really. so who knows what the fuck this is going to be. also no emojis. they take like half an hour extra. fuck that. read everything in the most deadpan voice ever, coz that’s how i’m feeling. 

the humidity’s gotten to surbhi’s hair. you can see the difference between her real hair and the extensions super clearly. 

lmao gauri, such a drama queen. i love her so muchhh.

i really like anika’s shirt/kurta thingy. i want.

what ajeeb aunties, why are they following her to the bathroom??? 

OH HO ANIKAAAAAAAAAAA

jai ho sree sree 1008 kanji aankhon waale billu baba ka, who anticipated wife might need to do some on-the-fly locksmith-ing and provided a swiss army knife.

ok barely 2 minutes in, and the sound editing is already pissing me off. 

billuji ka “the wife is in danger. again. as always.” radar has gone off. 

om’s soul has left his body, that’s how fucking bored and done he is with ring shopping. #same tbh

why the fuck would you want some ancient stolen ring, bruh? that shit prolly has a curse put on it. 

i legit wanted this scene to be stolen from friends, for shviaay to leave to go save the girls, and om to end up in a cage like phoebe. that would have been fucking hilaaaarious 

this girl playing suman is soooo fucking pretty. and i appreciate that they’ve kept her dusky skin intact and haven’t tried to lighten the fuck outta her. 

give suman a show of her own! 

what horrible editingggggggg, why would you show the phone ringing on that end before this scene of her calling him? like honestly.

ok suman, stop ending every sentence with “di”. it’s annoying. 

oufffffffffff loud aunties and their darwaza peetna. 

that’s one faaaaaancy ghusalkhaana, gauri. 

no indian railway station waiting room is that fancy. have they even seen an indian railway station? 

bhavya you idiot, that’s called gut instinct and you should never ignore it. have you ever seen shivaay ignore his anika radar? 

i interrupt this broadcast to ask you a vital question: should i fill my depression hole with cake or chips? or make some popcorn? sweet? salty??? or should i just accept where i am in life and crumble the chips and cake INTO the popcorn and kill all the birds with one stone?  

(goddamnit my skin just cleared up this week. fuck me and my bad life choices.) 

GOD THAT’S ANIKA ISN’T IT???????? THIS BITCH LIKES TO FUCKING REPLACE EVERYYYYYYYYY DAMN BRIDE IN THIS SHOW. 

YUP. KNEW IT.

who the fuck is this random aunty giving reproductive advice to rudra in a railway station waiting room? what the fuck is wrong with desis? 

this annoying child is lucky he’s so stinking cute, or someone would have murdered him for being such a wiseass. 

the humidity has done the opposite on shrenu’s hair - the extensions are all frizzy, and her original hair is still silky smooth. girl how? leak your routine plz. 

omkara you naalaayak dheent fucker PICK UP THE FUCKING PHONE

OMFG HE DIDN’T JUST PULL THE “WE’RE ON BREAK” CARD. BOY, I WILL LEGIT KICK YOUR DAMN ASS FROM HERE TO BAREILLY IF I HAVE TO 

ANIKA THIS IS NOT A SMILEY WINKY SITUATION THIS IS A FUCKING YOU’RE GOING TO GET MARRIED TO A RANDOM TALLI BUDDDHA IF YOU DON’T GET THE FUCK OUTTA THERE RN SITUATION

“phatphatiiii maiyya” 

shivaay’s too busy staring at the stupid ring. i swear the man is really a cat. easily distracted by shiny things. 

god. idhar antakshari chal rahi hai. is gul single handedly trying to revive the dead game of antakshari? why do they play it so much in this damn show?

uncle so besuraaaaaaaaaaaa 

ok fwding this nonsense. 

great, mukhiya has seen anika’s chikni chameli chandni whatever 

greaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaattttttt. the cat is out the bag. the anika’s out the ghoongat. (have i said this before?? i feel like i have. i probably have. this girl’s replaced so many brides, i’ve lost count.) 

shivaay’s finally gotten out the damn ring shop and looked at his phone. 

apparently we’re also in the year 2014, since shivaay’s suddenly using an iphone 5s outta nowhere. 

no she’s most definitely not theeeeeeeeeek. didn’t you hear her scream???? 

great. it’s waaaaaay past 1 am and my cat is screaming too. i know that feel, cat-son, but as an adult human, i have to do it on the inside. but you do you, i guess. *puts on headphones* 

ok this pirate mukhiya is ridiculoussssly OTT 

ok anika, stop with the pati crap. since when are you like this? you used to be a badass all on your own. and you have gauri with you too! pati pati pati, pffft. ugh, this is why everyone hates couples. 

bansi kaka gives zero fucks about the oberoi bahu about to be shot right in front of him. best. what khatirdaari. 

omfg gauri’s bhaujaiiiii yell just added 10 years to my godforsaken life. gauri is my everything. my everything. i love her so much. ‘

lol anika’s in her elementtttttttttttt once on scootyyyyy. just look at her “bitch come mess with me now” face

omfg suman you stupid girl why are you back here???????

ok fwding this ruvya nonsense. 

literally just watching this svetVi plot for my queen’s amazing face. what a face. gosh. i am so in love with her. 

god fuck you jhanvi. you’re so stupid, you deserve to go to jail even if you didn’t do it. 

WHAT OBEROIS KA RAAZ INSIDE PAINTING WHAT THE FUCK EVEN IS THIS STUPIDASS PLOT GODDDDDDD

do they know the raaz? tej and jhanvi i mean? 

ok this episode is called “svetlana’s sneaky escape” but that wasn’t even sneaky? she just literally threw something at him and ran away. zero sneak involved. just quick reflexes. 

back to ruvya nonsense. fwding. 

my mind won’t stop playing that stupid trippy trippy hickey hickey song on repeat. what a horrible yet addictive fucking song. 

OH GUN KA SHOT LAAGE LU GANDA THOUGHT LAAGE LU OH BABY HOT LAAGE LU NOW TELL ME WHAT TO DO?!?!?

ok done fwding. 

khanna waale actor ka contract renegotiate hua hai kya? he’s getting a lottttt of footage these days. 

OMFG KHANNA YOU’RE THE WORSTTTTTTTTTTTT SRSLY. A MOULDY POTATO CAN DO THIS JOB BETTER THAN YOU

pinky is selecting her jewelry for shivaay’s shaadi? reallllly? she’s so happy to be part of the wedding? 

has she made palti back on to the good side and is just playing svetlana? god, with pinky i can never tell. i just accept whatever. 

svetlana may be on the run, but she completely switched up her outfit and makeup like the queen that she is. love it. love that commitment. meanwhile, i would wear the jammies i slept in even to work if i could. 

here, have some more of svetlana’s flawless face: 

dadi who the fuck even is left in the house to scream? there’s literally only one woman in the house rn.

yes, teaaaaaam up, my two evil queeeens. 

lmaooooooooooo pinky’s look at svetlana when she said she might hit her up for more cash. 

ugh more of this ruvya crap. 

oh apparently tej is back as tej. what phuski end to that track. 

every time dadi says “is ghar mein sabbbbbbbb kuch theek ho gaya”, a new disaster comes. can she not? 

fwding this garbage, where are my girls and are they ok??? 

what even is this stupid ruvya track ouffffffff fwdingggggggggggggg

GREAT. FWD KARTE KARTE EPISODE HI KHATAM HO GAYA 

aaaaaaaaand the phatphati is outta gas or whatever. great. 

on the bright side it’s raining and we might get a rain hug for our couples? no? i’m just clinging onto the last vestiges of my hope wrt this show? yeah, sounds about right.