#21 years old being considered a milestone is completely useless to me because I don’t and will never drink alcohol. so I get different treat

[cr0wc0rpse]

My 21st birthday is in a few days and I’m excited to do puzzles and get juice reward

[conquerorofshamballa2-blog]

This could not be more last minute lol

Sorry @tsumi-alchemist​ but you got stuck with the worst procrastinator on the planet for your @fmasecretsanta2018​. Here’s some royed domestic college AU fluff and smut for ya, hope you enjoy :)

Roy tapped his foot against the linoleum floors of their kitchen as he thought to himself, mulling Ed's question to him over in his head. But it was hard to think when he’s getting glared at impatiently, no matter much he loves those fiery eyes.

"Yes or no question, Roy."

"Don't play that card with me. You know it's more complicated than that." Nothing is ever complicated to Ed. Roy wishes he could live with that kind of clarity, knowing so strongly with all his being right from wrong, seeing the world in stark, contrasting colors. At least he’s had the comfort of getting to see the world in golden brilliance ever since Ed came into his life.

Ed huffs in annoyance, which is his typical response when Roy dares to make words with his mouth, as if he could ever be correct. Or at least, as correct as Ed is. "Fine. Okay... what if it's guaranteed that neither of us will get hurt?"

Well, that does make things simpler. Roy crosses his arms and leans back against the counter, hand coming up to stroke his chin as he watches Ed raid their pantry. He'll never understand how he can come home from movies hungry, after hoovering up both his own and half of Roy's popcorn like his body was fueled solely by salt and butter and he was close to dying.

"Hm... that does make it more tempting, but... no. No, I wouldn't let a symbiote enter our relationship."

Ed scoffs at him. "Coward."

"Selfish." Roy corrects him with an amused smile. "I simply don't want to share you."

Ed finally finds something that pleases him, kicking the cupboard door shut behind him as he unwraps the tinfoil prize in his hand, chomping into the poptart with gusto. And Lord, Roy loves him. How can he make the most barbaric behaviors come off as irresistibly charming?

“No wonder you changed your career choice.” He says with a mouthful of the cardboard snack, spraying crumbs as he talks. “You’d make a lousy scientist.”

“And what makes you say that?” Roy asks, though he doesn’t question Ed’s judgement on the matter. He’s barely an adult and already halfway through his PhD program, plowing through courses at a rate that makes even the coldest, most sardonic professors at their university worry about his health. His mind is as brilliant as the golden hair that halos him, and Roy marvels at being allowed to take up space in that ever whirring mind.

Meanwhile, Roy was at a loss with what to do with his BS in chemistry when he first graduated, not knowing how to structure his life outside of school. After a particularly miserable stint in the military, he returned with new purpose, finding a home in politics. He was a little behind, however, having to start over and now still working towards his MS in polisci at the tail end of his 20s.

He wouldn’t change any of it, though. Not at the risk of never meeting the incredible man standing barefoot with a mouth full of sugary sand in his kitchen. That’s the one good thing that came out of his now useless chemistry degree; the ability to sign up as a TA for the class he met Edward in. He’ll never forget that first meeting, a furious angel with looks that could kill storming into his borrowed office, failed assignment in hand and mouth already running. Roy could barely keep up with the colorful, creative insults (mostly aimed at his intelligence) hurled his way, partly because he was too taken aback by suddenly being face to face with the most beautiful human being he had ever seen in his life.

After finally calming him down and getting to take another look at his assignment, Roy was able to confirm that yes, Ed did get everything correct, and my apologies, I must have mixed your grade up with another student’s, and also, would you like to get coffee sometime?

The ridiculous, gawking look Ed had given him was almost worth the sting of rejection he felt when he stomped out of his office, slamming the door hard enough to knock off some professor’s doctoral degree that had been hanging on the wall, glass front shattering.

It wasn’t an entirely surprising reaction, considering what he had quickly learned about the young man’s temper within that brief meeting. What was surprising was when a familiar, golden wreathed angel stomped right back up to him in class the next day, shoving a scrap of paper with a cell number hastily scribbled on it into Roy’s hands before stomp stomp stomping away again without a single word.

It was a rare occurrence for Roy, getting surprised. He knew instantly this could be something special, something real.

“What makes me say that,” Ed starts, pulling Roy out of his nostalgic reverie, “is that any scientist worth their salt would not hesitate to fuck Venom. Or fuck their boyfriend while being bonded to Venom.”

Yes. This has absolutely become something very, very special.

“Well, I’m happy to know where your mind was at while we were watching that movie.” Roy says dryly, frowning at the crumbs that were now dusting his previously clean floor.

“My mind was at science. Shut up, everything I say makes perfect sense.” He commands before Roy gets the chance to tease him for his wording. “I mean, how can you not wonder at the logistics of it?”

“I also wonder at the logistics of cloning and creating advanced AIs that could one day destroy us all, but that doesn’t mean I’m actually going to do it.”

“Because you’re a coward.” Ed reiderates, putting the half eaten poptart, unwrapped, back in the cupboard, because he’s a savage.

“I already feel sorry for the poor ethics committee members who are going to have the misfortune of dealing with your bullheadedness once you start leading your own research projects.”

“Good, somebody has to. Cause I sure as hell won’t.”

“I’m aware.” Roy says with a sigh, making a mental note to sweep his kitchen later. “Are you aware that when we get mice, you’re the one who’s going to have to get rid of them?”

“I’m aware that I’ve been living here for a year and I haven’t seen a single mouse yet. Clearly I’m not as much as a slob as you think.” He retorts, leaving the kitchen behind so he can flop down on the couch in the living room.

Roy’s train of thought is completely thrown off by that statement, and he joins him silently without anymore witty remarks. “... Has it really been a year?”

“Almost. In about a month.” He sighs and closes his eyes, stretched out on the couch like a lazy cat soaking up sunlight. Roy sits on the opposite end, muscle memory commanding him to pick up Ed’s flesh foot and start rubbing, thumbs digging into his pressure points.

“That means it’s your birthday soon. I’ll finally be able to take you out for a drink.” He muses, already trying to figure out which bar Ed would like best.

“Who says I wanna go drinking with you, old man? 21’s a big milestone, I’m supposed to party all night. You like to be in bed by nine.” He mocks him, face scrunching up before the initial pain turns into pleasure, expression melting into a more relaxed state.

“You wound me, Edward. Also, I know for a fact that you’d rather help Professor Izumi grade undergrad papers than stay at a bar all night long.”

“And that’s sayin’ something.” Ed mumbles miserably, lifting up his arms so he can interlock his hands behind his head. “Win and Ling will still make me, though. Nothing says a good time like mandatory fun.” He pauses, then, before looking up at Roy with unsureness in his eyes. “I was joking, you know. You’ll come, right? It’s gonna be miserable anyway, but it will be beyond miserable without you there to distract me.”

Roy smiles at him reassuringly, thumbs pressing into the bridge of his feet as he runs them slowly up and down. “Wouldn’t miss it for the world, sweetheart.”

The dusting of pink that coats Ed’s cheeks is delightful, and Roy can’t help but stare at it. He shyly looks away, suddenly very interested in inspecting the couch cushions. Ed never did quite get the hang of pet names, which means Roy uses them as often as possible.

“Sweetie. Sugar. Honey. Pudding. Pumpkin.” Roy’s smirk gets more and more devious as the list goes one, voice dripping with increasing amounts of fake, syrupy sweetness with every word.

That smirk transforms into a wide, laughing grin when he has to raise his arms to block the decorative pillow being hurled at him. He throws it back, of course, though not quite as hard. This turns into Ed holding onto the pillow as he batters Roy with it, which turns into Roy absconding from the couch to get extra ammo from the armchair. That turns into Ed chasing him, which turns into Roy running for dear life, stumbling into their bedroom to grab the bigger, bulkier pillows.

Things only escalate from there, the two of them ducking up and down from hiding behind their sides of the bed, taking pillows to the face and arms and tossing them back across the mattress. Ed’s loud, bright laughter fills the room when Roy vaults up onto Ed’s side of the bed, reaching down to pull him up onto the bed with him. His laugh is highly infectious, Roy laughing along with him as the battle continues in close combat, both their sides and chests getting pummeled by the plump, soft weapons. It ends with Ed collapsing backwards, Roy following and leaning over him as they both keep laughing, faces red from the exertion, panting and breathing in each other’s air as they struggle to catch their breaths.

He’s an absolute vision. Roy could stare down at the beautiful form below him for one hundred years, and still not be able to fully drink in and appreciate every perfect detail of Edward Elric. His chest rises and falls with each labored breath, cheeks a bright red and forehead covered in a thin sheen of sweat, bangs beginning to stick to it. His one thousand watt smile lights up Roy’s life, sparkling eyes more beautiful than any star. A halo of mussed hair frames his chiseled face, ponytail loose from the pillow fight with a multitude of flyaway strands sticking every which way. One strand is caught on Ed’s deliciously plump bottom lip, and Roy brushes it away before reaching behind Ed’s head to pull his hair tie out, letting the silken strands splay out onto the sheets.

“You,” He starts, bringing a hand up to cup Ed’s cheek, “are the most stunning creature I have ever laid eyes on.”

Edward’s smile falls, replaced by a hungry expression as he stares up at Roy through hooded eyes. “Dork. Shut up and kiss me.” Roy couldn’t possibly say no to that.

He braces himself on his hands next to either side of Ed’s head, slotting their lips together easily and naturally. He watched Ed’s eyes flutter close before he lets his own eyes slip shut, letting his other senses take control of drinking in just how wonderful the man under him is.Their lips move together slow and sweet, the soft, wet noises between them lulling Roy into a state of absolute zen. He could stay this way forever if it were up to him, but kisses with Ed would never stay this gentle. It wasn’t long before he felt two strong, muscular arms wrapping around him, pulling him closer and a hungry, searching tongue probing his lips for an opening. Roy surrenders easily, lips parting so he can suck Ed’s tongue into his mouth.

And Ed always kisses like a dying man, hungry and passionate and dizzying in the best of ways, leaving Roy breathless. The slide of their tongues against one another sends a shiver through him, that shiver only intensifying when he feels one of Ed’s hands run up into his hair to grip it at the roots. He responds in kind with a none too gentle nip to Ed’s bottom lip, causing his breath to hitch and his grip on Roy to tighten.

Roy would let him hold on like that forever, if he wanted to.

Luckily for Roy, Ed was always quick to let him know exactly what it was he wanted. He accomplishes it this time by shoving his crotch bodily up against Roy’s, making his rapidly developing interest in the situation known. The boldness alone is enough to make Roy moan, nevermind the tempting hardness that just got jammed against his thigh. Ed could be shy to initiate, but once things got going, Ed certainly got going himself. And who was Roy to deny him?

With well coordinated deftness, he has Ed unbuttoned and unzipped, shoving his boxers aside until he’s got Ed in his hands. Roy was never one to find genitalia all that aesthetically pleasing, but he’d be hard pressed not to find anything about Ed a marvel to look at, and his cock was no exception. Hard and pink tipped, nestled atop a bed of golden curls, pulse thrumming strong and hot through the prominent vein visible underneath…

“Take a picture; it’ll last longer.” Ed chokes out underneath him, eyes dazed and face alight as he bucks impatiently into Roy’s hand. “C’mon, Roy…” He whines so sweetly, and Roy was going to ask if he actually could take a picture, but well, he’s feeling rather distracted from that train of thought all of a sudden.

Long, slender fingers wrap more firmly around the beautiful, dripping cock beneath him, kisses migrating from Ed’s mouth to his neck, only so that he doesn’t block the litany of unrestrained sounds of desire that spill forth from Ed’s kiss bruised lips. The squirming beneath him does nothing to quell Roy’s need, and he can’t help but laugh at the frustrated moan that breaks free from Ed when he stops paying attention to him long enough for Roy to free himself from the constraints of his clothes.

He kisses his apology into the crook of Ed’s neck before taking both of them in his hand, pumping them together and rolling his hips against Ed as his own series of moans left his mouth, muffled against Ed’s sweaty, sweet smelling skin. He wasn’t able to appreciate the smell of a sexed up Edward for long, though, as two rough hands grabbed his face to pull him up into a hungry kiss.

The gasp that draws out of him gets swallowed hungrily by the ravenous mouth set upon him, the pace of his hand and hips quickening as a new desperation sweeps over him. That desperation turns into heat that pools deep within him, and if the frantic jerking of Ed’s cock in his hands is anything to go by, then Ed’s finding himself in a similar state. There’s no coordination anymore, no forethought, just bodies and tongues and lips and cocks rubbing and rolling against each other, slicked by mingling sweat and saliva and pre. The heat and pressure builds up to a point where it’s just almost too much to bear, nerve endings warring over whether to flood Roy’s brain with signals of pleasure or pain.

There’s a brief moment of absolute quiet and stillness below him before hot, sticky slick spills into his hand, a moan like shattering stained glass cracking through the air around them as Ed breaks from their kiss, finding his release. And that’s what Roy needed to finally tip over the edge himself, hips and hand stuttering as his cum mixes with Ed’s, moan muffled once he buries his face in the crook of Ed’s neck.

They stay that way for a while, clinging to one another as they struggle to catch their breaths, riding out the waves of oxytocin. Ed’s the first one to complain of stickiness, as usual, and after quickly discarding their clothes and briefly wiping themselves off, they’re finally snuggled back into bed again. They’re both quiet for the most part, a rarity between the two of them, as they soak up just how perfect an ending that was to a perfect day. Roy’s the first one to break the silence, living up to Ed’s constant insults about his ‘big fucking mouth.’

“Hey.” He takes Ed’s face between both hands, taking a moment to stare at his blissed out, post coitus expression before he breaks into a soft smile. “I love you.”

Flashes of doubt and uncertainty shine through Ed’s eyes, as they usually do when Roy makes such bold declarations. He’s able to settle into a state of acceptance after a moment, though, and Roy dreams of the day he can make that doubt disappear entirely. “Love you, too. Cheesy bastard.” Is Ed’s mumbled response, and how did such a dirty mouthed little brat come to make Roy’s chest swell so?

His amazement is cut short when Ed’s face wrinkles up with a yawn, which is just about the cutest thing Roy’s ever seen. “So,” Ed starts speaking on the tail end of his yawn, “we both have tomorrow off. What do you want to do?” Roy can’t help taking this opportunity.

“The way I see it,” he says with a deep voice, a pathetic, humorous attempt at imitating Venom’s alien growl, “WE can do whatever WE want.”

The sting of the smack he receives to his bicep is absolutely worth the bell like laughter that rings from Ed’s chest, filling the room as it fills Roy’s heart. Roy smiles wide and bright as he realizes there’s not a thing in this world that wouldn’t be worth getting to hear his angel laugh.