#1989 water movie

[atomic-chronoscaph]

Christian Slater and Winona Ryder - Heathers (1989)

[yourartmatters-itswhatgotmehere]

https://twitter.com/scuttlesz/status/1663244654609825797?s=20

https://x.com/scuttlesz/status/1663244654609825797

https://x.com/scuttlesz/status/1663317722648698881

+ 

https://twitter.com/alexguerinss/status/1760385955498766828

.https://www.tumblr.com/yourartmatters-itswhatgotmehere/779295176827994112?source=share & https://www.tumblr.com/yourartmatters-itswhatgotmehere/753605532240216064/howard-ashman-i-love-you-forever-so-many-of-us?source=share & https://yourartmatters-itswhatgotmehere.tumblr.com/post/737426324387430400/god-forbid-that-i-romanticise-this

https://yourartmatters-itswhatgotmehere.tumblr.com/post/736134370771025920/23

https://yourartmatters-itswhatgotmehere.tumblr.com/post/723826151852818432/the-little-mermaid-2023-bloopers

https://yourartmatters-itswhatgotmehere.tumblr.com/post/682315300725768192/what-a-mood

https://yourartmatters-itswhatgotmehere.tumblr.com/post/721568602844790784/this-means-the-world-to-me-my-two-ariels

https://yourartmatters-itswhatgotmehere.tumblr.com/post/715658847591759872/im-screaming-i-just-love-love-love-every-second

https://yourartmatters-itswhatgotmehere.tumblr.com/post/718666713582960640/after-thelittlemermaid2023-my-tlm-love-ig-post

https://yourartmatters-itswhatgotmehere.tumblr.com/post/740478933802352640/jess-you-are-so-loved-twt-fallen-thread

https://www.tumblr.com/yourartmatters-itswhatgotmehere/778693063160774656?source=share

[ruinedholograms]

DEEPCORE II (1989)

[anecdotal-acorn]

The Little Mermaid (1989) Dir. Ron Clements and John Musker

[jeandejard3n]

The Abyss: Alien Secret Base

[savage-kult-of-gorthaur]

DISNEY'S ULTIMATE UNDERSEA ANTAGONIST FLIRTS WITH DIVINITY.

PIC INFO: Resolution at 1080x1347 -- Spotlight on a Divine & Ursula (or vice versa) mashup piece, and part of the Six Fan Arts series "Divas & Fictional Characters" by Sveta Shubina, c. 2021.

DIVINE/URSULA OVERVIEW: "There was one key Minkoff drawing, where it was just a drawing where [Ursula] looked like a Miami Beach matron. [Lyricist] Howard Ashman liked that. We liked that. That was a key one," said Clements.

"Howard said, "This is great. She looks like a Miami Beach Matron." And we got into a whole thing about Divine," said "The Little Mermaid" codirector John Musker on the audio commentary for movie's recent signature collection release.

The Baltimore-born drag queen, who had starred in 1988's "Hairspray" as Edna Turnblad, became a big source of inspiration for the sea witch. 

"Some of the early development art that Rob was doing and others were doing, was really trying to get some of Divine's big, campy, overweight diva, get that into the witch. And so there are still vestiges of it in the witch," said Musker.

A Disney Animation representative told INSIDER that John Musker played more with Minkoff's Divine-inspired version of the villainess. Animators Kevin Lima ("Enchanted" director) and Glen Keane took the design even further in the Divine direction, giving her a mohawk hairstyle similar to the star in "Pink Flamingos." 

It's not tough to see the influences of Divine in the final character. Ursula's hair, wide smile, her big personality, and the way she carries herself all appear to be references toward the performer."

-- INSIDER, "How "The Lion King" co-director, a drag queen, and one of Disney's greatest animators helped bring "The Little Mermaid" villain to life," by Kirsten Acuña, c. 2019

Sources: www.pinterest.com/pin133841420165065944 and www.insider.com/the-little-mermaid-ursula-concept-art-2019-7%3famp.

[hillaryisaboss]

A film set to unwinnable expectations. Too “woke” for having Halle Bailey play Ariel; not “woke” enough because it is still a classic fairytale written by Hans Christian Andersen in 1837, where a princess falls in-love with a prince.

What I saw was a fabulous live-action adaptation. The acting & music is truly on-point.

Disney also added backstory to the Prince, which was very worthwhile storytelling. Visually, it was a stunning movie. The water effects on the hair are a sight-to-behold. And if you’ve seen Pirates of the Caribbean, it is that style/mood mixed with Disney magic & great songs.

Though the 2023 live-action will never be our cartoon imagination from childhood, the original film from 1989 will always be there for us to watch over-and-over again.

However, if you watch the other live-action Disney adaptations, this one truly is the best one by far. Some just want to hate it for whatever reason.

Halle Bailey did a phenomenal job as Ariel & I saw many African American kids in the audience at the theatre. Representation matters ❤️🧡💛💚💙💜

Go see The Little Mermaid!! It is the right film for the moment — a moment where Disney is being banned in Florida.

Sing & celebrate under the sea with this truly amazing film!! Go Halle Go!! Our Disney heroine 🧜🏾‍♀️

[thegothicalice]

I absolutely love your style and was wondering as a cinemaphile what obscure, off the wall horror movies would you suggest for the spooky season?

Uhhhh how about various levels of obscure from the 80s and 90s? (Not a complete lists because I’ve seen literally thousands of films and forget half of what I watch and use Letterboxd to keep track)

1999– Idle Hands, Don’t Look Under the Bed, Bats, Ravenous, In Dreams, Lighthouse, Stir of Echos, Audition, Kolobos

1998—The Last Broadcast, Devil in the Flesh, Whispering Corridors, Urban Legend, Shadowbuilder, The Eternal, The Quiet Family, Strangeland, Deep Rising, The Wisdom of Crocodiles, Tomie

1997– The Relic, The Ugly, Event Horizon, Cure, Wax Mask, Snow White: A Tale of Terror, Quicksilver Highway, Office Killer, The Night Flier

1996– From Dusk til Dawn, Little Witches, Uncle Sam, The Frighteners, The Dentist, Karmina, Thesis, Tromeo & Juliet,

1995– Blood & Donuts, Screamers, Tales from the Hood, The Demolitionist, Mushrooms, The Girl With the Hungry Eyes, The Day of the Beast, Serpent’s Lair, Rumpelstiltskin, Mute Witness, Evil Ed, Project: Metalbeast, Habit, The Addiction, Tales From the Crypt: Demon Knight, Lord of Illusions

1994– Tammy & the T Rex, In the Mouth of Madness, Lurking Fear, Cemetery Man, Death Machine, Brainscan, Nadja

1993– Love Bites, Doppelgänger, Necronomicon, Body Bags, Ed & His Dead Mother, Dark Waters, Skinner, Jack Be Nimble, Ticks, Carnosaur, The Temp

1992– Death Becomes Her, The Vagrant, Tale of a Vampire, The Unnameable II, Innocent Blood, Dr Giggles, Auntie Lee’s Meat Pies, Aswang, Sleepwalkers, Netherworld, Split Second

1991– The Resurrected, The Boneyard, Body Parts, Popcorn, Subspecies, There’s Nothing Out There, Highway to Hell, The Runestone, Cast a Deadly Spell, Children of the Night

1990– Frankenhooker, Fear, Nightbreed, Lisa, Mom, Grim Prairie Tales, Shakma, Pale Blood, Baby Blood, Mirror Mirror, Hardware, Meridian, Def by Temptation, The Vampire Family, Reflecting Skin, Demonia

1989– Sundown: The Vampire in Retreat, Nightlife, I Madman, Dr. Caligari, The Black Cat, Paganini Horror, Phantom of the Mall: Eric’s Revenge, The Dead Pit, The Phantom of the Opera, Dead Calm, Intruder, The House of Usher

1988– Paperhouse, Spider Labyrinth, Spell Caster, Sorority Babes in the Slime-Bowl-O-Rama, Cellar Dweller, Pin, 976-EVIL, Brain Damage, Rejuvenatrix, Blood Relations, Party Line, The Unnamable, The Wicked

1987– Psychos in Love, Blood Rage, The Caller, Stagefright, Graveyard Shift, American Gothic, Street Trash, From a Whisper to a Scream, Blood Diner

1986– Spookies, Poison for the Fairies, Vamp, Gothic, Deadtime Stories, TerrorVision, Witchboard, Trick or Treat

1985– The Doctor and the Devils, Phenomena, The Stuff

1984– Decoder, The Company of Wolves, Monster Dog, Sole Survivor, Special Effects

1983– The Lift, Wilczyca (She Wolf), Eyes of Fire, House of Long Shadows, The Hunger, Angst, Curtains, Blood Beat, Mortuary, The Keep

1982– Ferat Vampire, Next of Kin, The Sender, Tenebre, One Dark Night, The Living Dead Girl, Superstition, Alone in the Dark, Parasite

1981– The Black Cat, Fear No Evil, Dead & Buried, Possession, Night School, The Monster Club, Allison’s Birthday, Frightmare, Ghost Story, The Funhouse, The Pit, Evilspeak, Strange Behavior, The Nesting

1980– Macabre, Fade to Black, The Ninth Configuration, The Legend of Sleepy Hollow

These are all just what I’ve recorded on my personal Letterboxd since I started it in April of 2017, I’ve seen plenty more but tried to just pick possibly less-known stuff, some bad and some good.

[alpaca-clouds]

Let Us Talk About Insects For Once

I could swear I have talked on this before, but I cannot find it (tumblr search is still busted) and also, it is something important, that sadly a lot of the big science communicators have communicated wrongly - mainly due to trying people to care about it.

You probably have heard this phrase before: Save the bees!

And the image this conjured up for you is this one:

The kinda adorable, fluffy little honey bee, who make nice and tasty honey for us, are being kept all around, and also have a very weird movie about interspecies romance dedicated to them, that communicates this issue wrong once more.

Well, what if I told you, that a) honey bees are just a very tiny minority of the insects responsible for polinating plants in the world, and b) are actually doing right fine, given that they are somewhat domesticated and people make money with them. So yeah, to the shock of absolutely no-one the Bee Movie is horrid pro-honey-bee propaganda.

Instead the animals mainly responsible for polinating our plants are other species of bees - those actually endangered often - who live often more solitarily and do not produce honey either at all or in as high quantities as the honey bee does. Butterflies, moths, wasps, flies, beetles and wasps instead are doing a whole lot of polination work, too.

And yeah, I get that the flies - such as the humble hoverfly - are not as cute or sexy, as the honey bee is, but... we kinda need them fort his whole pollination shit. I mean, by as much propaganda as the Bee Movie it, it was right about one thing: While it would absolutely not affect anyone if all honey bees went on a worldwide strike (good labor coordination though!), if we run out of polinators we might be a bit fucked.

So, honor the beetle and the humble hover fly.

Of course polination is not the only thing that we need insects for.

Yes, I am well aware that most time humans think of insects mostly as annoying pests, but let's be honest: We kinda know that they are somewhat important for the eco-system.

Other jobs that insects take over in the eco-system include, but are not limited to:

Removing waste (such as feces and dead animals)

Providing a food source for all sorts of small critters

Help plants filter water

Loosen the ground by digging through it and making it hence better suited to grow plants

Control one another and other animals, who without them would turn into a danger for humans and/or the eco-system

And that is without helpful jobs insects might actually take over for humans - especially in agrarculture, like hunting other pests or breaking down weeds.

So, you might notice: Even the stupid, digusting kinds of insects are kinda important and fulfill their own specific place in the eco system.

And as anyone who so much as looked at a car in the year 2000 vs today might have noticed... insects are kinda in trouble. Because in the year 2000 your typical car windshield looked like this:

Which is not what it tends to look like today. And while this is anecdote and not scientific data, we of course also have studies that confirm this subjective information.

Scientists have measured the biomass of insects in the environment with certain measures and have found results worthy of concern. Over here in Germany the flying insect biomass has decreased by 75% between 1989 and 2016. Sweden found the same 75% for a similar timeframe. The ground based insects looked better, though their biomass is harder to measure. Depending on the study their biomass has decreased between 18 and 34% over the last 30 years.

An US study found that the overall biomass has decreased by about 34% in the US, the abundance of insects (basically how densely they live and how likely it is for you to encounter insects) however by 61%. And mind you, the same study noticed that while this is an issue the abundance of certain insects - ones that in their current population might become a problem for either humans or the environment - increased.

Several studies also have found that while these decreases were observed, a similar decrease was observed in some species feeding on certain insects - especially birds and certain rodents.

Which lets me speak about the origins of this issue. Why are the insects dying?

I am guessing that both solarpunks and guerilla gardeners might be most familiar with the issue of the lawn and the impervious surfaces.

To make it short: A lot of insects rely either on earth to dig in, or on those plants to polinate - because it is an important food source. They might also rely on certain forms of biological waste (like dead animals and animal feces). And basiclly in a lot of areas we removed all of this. We replaced natural flowers with well maintained lawn, and compacted the ground, if not sealed it all together with concrete. We also remove those dead animals and the animal poo from nature, because it bothers us. And with that we take a lot of insects important elements to live on.

Which means that, yes, ideally a garden should look a lot more like the one beneath than what the HOA (a thing that pretty much is non-existent outside the US) wants you to have.

But again, this is not where it ends. We need more ground that is not sealed and not compacted. We need ground that insects can live and borrow in. Just as we need some animal carcasses to just rot where the animal died - and some animal poo to stink up some areas were humans might live. I am sorry, but there it is.

And yes, I hear you screaming. "But what about the poison?!" And yes, that is also another issue, that definitely is impacting the biomass - though the abundance is more influenced by the last three points.

Basically, yes, a lot of the stuff that farmers use to fight off either weeds or pests are obviously also killing the insects that we technically would love to survive. Because poison tends to not differentiate.

And then there is of course the other issue: Invasive species and climate change.

Germans might be well aware of these fuckers, that kinda look like ladybirds (no, but really, why are they called ladybirds and not ladybugs?) but are not. Or are, but not the right one. Basically they are species of ladybirds that are from other places on the world and somehow ended up over here, where for a variety of reasons they kinda end up killing the local ladybirds. Partly by competing for food sources, partly by being poisonous, and so on.

And of course they are not the only invasive insect species. In fact, the most invasive species tend to be insects and arachnids. And the reason for them living here is two fold.

While most of the time insects and arachnids tend to not be rewilded in places were they are not supposed to be, they do at times hitch rides on humans who travel the world - or in the luggage of said humans.

At times some of those species just happen to do the travelling on their own. For example, I spent the last two years collecting a couple of spiders of the Nosferatu spider species, that just managed to make their way from Southern Europe up here to Germany on their own.

And the reason they manage to survive is obviously climate change. It has gotten too warm and a lot of insects that would not survive here before now are capable of doing so.

And of course some insects that are natural in these parts, can no longer survive because it is too hot for them.

Those issues are obviously not just a thing in Germany. They are a problem basically everywhere.

Which reminds me of one thing. Don't get me wrong. There is some insects that are generally not really beneficial outside of feeding birds maybe. Mosquitos are one of those, which is why there are researchers arguing for erradicating them. Not becuase their bites are annoying, but because they get us - and some animals - all sorts of sicknesses. (Even though we obviously know that their existence once saved earth, lol)

But yeah, insects dying is a problem. And we should do something about it. Not just the sexy honey bee, but also some annoying flies and stuff.

And because y'all managed to read all of this so far, you get a picture of a pretty butterfly.

[kudotsurugi]

Random Thought: Why does all "90's Anime style" fanart just look like Sailor Moon?

Okay, obviously not all fanart looks like it. But if you were to type in "90s anime style" here on Tumblr or DeviantArt at the time of this post, it at least seems to be the majority stand-in for 90s anime aesthetic, right? Especially in the characters' eyes.

Don't me wrong, this is not a knock against Sailor Moon. It is a great anime, and the collective character designs by Kazuko Tadano, Ikuko Ito, and Mari Tominaga among other staff are iconic. So iconic that Tadano was brought back as the character designer for the latest Sailor Moon movies. That is quite the staying power.

But let's be fair, there are plenty of 90s anime out there that can also be used as inspiration. So, here are the names of 11 character designers alongside some gifs of shows/projects they worked on in that role. Some you may not know but you've seen their work, and others you probably know for their distinct art style or association with a franchise.

Things worth noting: First, the years listed here with some anime may reflect when the artists' work started airing, rather than when the anime itself actually started. Some folks listed here enter their projects mid-production in other roles, while others are in the role from the start. Second, each entry will list 1 or 2 projects aired/released during the 90s, but it will be noted if the artist's role continues beyond that with certain franchises. Lastly, these artists are listed in no particular order, so no "top 11" hierarchy. With that said, here's our examples:

Hisashi Eguchi (Roujin Z[1991], Sonic the Hedgehog CD [1993])

2. Katsuyoshi Nakatsuru(Dragon Ball franchise (Z [1993-96], GT [1996], Daima [2024]), Digimon franchise [1999-2002, 2019-2023])

3. Kumiko Takahashi (Cardcaptor Sakura [1998-2000], Birdy The Mighty[1996])

4. Takahiro Yoshimatsu (Trigun[1998], Slayers franchise[1995-97])

5. Atsuko Nakajima (Ranma 1/2[1989-1992], You're Under Arrest[1996])

6. Sayuri Ichiishi (Pokémon[Pokémon design: 1996-present, human character design: 1996-2017])

7. Atsuko Ishida (Magic Knight Rayearth[1994-1995])

8. Masaya Onishi (Yu Yu Hakusho[1993-1994])

9. Toshihiro Kawamoto(Cowboy Bebop[1998-1999], Mobile Suit Gundam: The 08th MS Team[1996])

10. Hiroshi Osaka(Gundam franchise[Mobile Suit Victory Gundam: 1993-1994, Mobile Fighter G-Gundam:1994-1995])

11. Yoshiyuki Sadamoto(Nadia: The Secret of Blue Water[1990-1991], Neon Genesis Evangelion franchise[1995-1997, 2007-2021])

Might've leaned a bit more on the Shonen side of things than Shojo, but I hope you can see my point😅. There are tons of 90s anime out there with their own unique feel and aesthetic. These are only 11 names that I found.

For anyone drawing 90s anime style fanart, I hope this has given you some inspiration, and I encourage anyone reading this to look up your favourite anime on Anime News Network's encyclopedia and see who's responsible for helping bring your favorite characters to life on screen and what other shows they've worked on.

[milfjagger]

horror recs 2024

categories are a little broad but take from it what you will. personal favs are in bold and a * next to the name means this movie genuinely scared me

serial killers/stalkers/home invasion the black phone (2021) the invisible man (2020) hannibal (series; 2013-2015) maniac (2012) american psycho (2000) the silence of the lambs (1991) opera (1987) tourist trap (1979) halloween (1978) deep red (1975) black christmas (1974) the texas chain saw massacre (1974) peeping tom (1960)

ghosts/hauntings talk to me (2022) the haunting of hill house (series; 2018) i am the pretty thing that lives in the house (2016) under the shadow (2016) crimson peak (2015) mama (2013) the orphanage (2007) lake mungo (2008)* dark water (2005) the ring (2002) the others (2001) the devil's backbone (2001) ring (1998)* candyman (1992) poltergeist (1982) the haunting (1963) the innocents (1961)

vampires interview with the vampire (series; 2022- ) midnight mass (series; 2021) let the right one in (2008) bram stoker's dracula (1992) near dark (1987) the lost boys (1987) fright night (1985) dracula (1958) nosferatu (1922)

werewolves dog soldiers (2002) ginger snaps (2000) & ginger snaps 2 (2004) the howling (1981) an american werewolf in london (1981)

demons/witches longlegs (2024)* smile (2022)* incantation (2022)* hereditary (2018)* suspiria (2018) veronica (2017)* terrified (2017)* pyewacket (2017)* the autopsy of jane doe (2016) the exorcist (series; 2016-2018) the blackcoat's daughter (2015) the witch (2015)* evil dead (2013) the exorcism of emily rose (2005) the blair witch project (1999) the craft (1996) hellraiser (1987) suspiria (1977) the exorcist (1973) the devil rides out (1968) rosemary's baby (1968) black sunday (1960)

survival horror yellowjackets (series; 2021 - ) the terror (series; 2017) rogue (2007) the descent (2005)* open water (2003)

sci-fi horror crimes of the future (2022) annihilation (2018)* the fly (1986) the thing (1982) alien (1979) & aliens (1986)

monster movies willow creek (2013)* troll hunter (2010) the host (2006) pumpkinhead (1988)

folk horror the ritual (2017)* wake wood (2009)* the hallow (2015) pet sematary (1989) the wicker man (1973) the blood on satan's claw (1971) night of the demon (1957)

fantasy/fairytale horror gretel and hansel (2020) red riding hood (2011) the juniper tree (1990) the company of wolves (1984) psychological horror (that doesn't fit better into another category) candyman (2021) the lighthouse (2019) us (2019) get out (2017) gerald's game (2017) a cure for wellness (2016) the invitation (2015) it follows (2014)* excision (2012) may (2002) frailty (2001) dead ringers (1988) gothic (1986) carrie (1976) cat people (1942)

indie/experimental (mileage may vary) enys men (2022) skinamarink (2022) bones and all (2022) men (2022) the house (2022) relic (2020)* saint maud (2019) mandy (2018) the wind (2018) raw (2016)

balls to the wall crazy/fun as hell evil dead rise (2023) fall of the house of usher (series; 2023) late night with the devil (2023) saw movies (2004-2023) the menu (2022) nope (2022) malignant (2021) escape room (2019) & escape room: tournament of champions (2021) run (2020) the chilling adventures of sabrina (series; 2018-2020) 31 (2016) the boy (2016) american mary (2012) repo! the genetic opera (2007) trick 'r' treat (2007) sweeney todd (2007) dead silence (2007) house of wax (2005) house of 1000 corpses (2003) final destination (2000) ravenous (1999) lair of the white worm (1988) brain damage (1988) the texas chainsaw massacre 2 (1986) re-animator (1985) & bride of re-animator (1990) evil dead movies (1981-1992) phantom of the paradise (1974)

[heartbreakgrill]

how you get the girl: calum hood.

1989 (Heartbreak Grill’s Version)

stand there like a ghost, shaking from the rain. she’ll open up the door and say, ‘are you insane?’

“there’s someone here for you!”

i looked up from my computer screen, eyes trailing across the rainy window, pattering softly from the droplets that drenched the glass. my roommate passed my room, lazily shouting the sentence through the open door.

i furrowed my brows. i wasn’t expecting anybody, and i didn’t have any packages that were getting delivered- at least, not until tomorrow.

“who is it?” i shouted down the hall, towards the living room, as i stepped from my room.

“don’t know. some boy,” she replied. the television unpaused and a laughter track interrupted any further conversation we could have.

i turned back towards the front door. a blurry shadow was illuminated through the frosted panes of the door. it was a tall man. part of me worried that this was the moment at the beginning of a horror movie, when girls like me always died.

part of me worried it was someone worse.

i latched a hand around the door knob, cowering in on myself as the brisk wind gushed through the foyer of the apartment. goosebumps nibbled at my skin. i shivered. my hair wafted over my shoulders.

and my eyes focused on the figure looming over my doorstep, their black clothing dripping with water, hair soaked to the scalp.

my jaw slackened, my eyes widened. “what the fuck are you doing here?”

calum let out a heavy sigh, as though he’d been holding his breath since the last time we spoke. my eyes drug over his stormy demeanor, images flashing through my mind of a time i tried so hard not to remember.

“calum,” i insisted, “what are you doing here? what- don’t you have tour? shouldn’t you be in- in mexico right now?”

“i had to see you,” he rushed out.

rain splashed on my bare feet, against the exposed skin on my arms, as the sky continued pouring. i flinched at the cold droplets.

“what…” i couldn’t put together many words right now, but i knew, “you need to come in, you’re gonna get sick!”

i stepped aside, ushering him into the foyer. the carpet dampened under his converse and a puddle started forming on the hardwood. calum shook his hair out, spraying water across my shirt like a dog fresh out of a bath.

i huffed, “um…let me get- a towel. hang on. stay,” i gestured to him like he really was an animal.

he chuckled shortly.

say it’s been a long six months and you were too afraid to tell her what you want.

i ushered calum into my room, shoving a towel into his hands. i lay another one across the floor to clean up his mess. he shed his converse, his jacket, tossing it into my hamper.

“you still have my zeppelin shirt,” he stated, memory clear as a day.

“is that what you came here for?” i crossed my arms, a little defensive at his somewhat rude accusation.

calum dried his curls out with the towel. he chuckled again at my words. “no…i-“ he ran the towel over his face, then pointed at his body, “i’m soaked. you have my shirt.”

“oh!” i straightened up, red in the face at my lack of understanding. “yeah…i…”

i ashamedly dug through my pajama drawer, pulling out the top-big t-shirt that i resisted the urge to wear to sleep sometimes. i turned my body away from calum as he began to take off his shirt, with no warning. but, i could him in the mirror.

my eyes trailed over his body, as sure as my fingertips remember it.

say it’s been a long six months, and you were too afraid to tell her what you want.

calum spoke my name, a sound so sweet, so sacred, that my body wracked with anticipation, with a drawing want for what we had.

i looked back at him, arms uncrossing themselves. “why are you here, calum?” my tone had dropped, a saddened furrow pulling my brows together. “it’s been…six months.”

“i know,” calum stepped towards me, hands shaking before him. he lay them out like a truce. i wanted to grab them, to hit them yet hold them. to curse them and worship their fingertips.

i pressed my own fingers to my forehead, cooling the heat that sprouted there. “what- just please, say something! i don’t hear from you for six months and you just…show up, out of the blue? what’s going on?”

calum fidgeted with the ring on his finger, rolled his lips together. they were nervous habits i’d picked up on in the short time we’d spent together.

flickering memories i’d never seemed to be able to forget.

“i’m sorry,” calum shook his head, as if rejecting his own actions. “im sorry for leaving. im sorry for not saying goodbye. im sorry for…for not telling you…”

and that’s how it works, that’s how you get the girl.

“telling me what?” i could feel frustrated, angry tears welling up in my eyes. i was just so…how could he do this?

how could he come into my life, unexpectedly, make me feel things i’d never known before, then shut the door on a chapter that had gone unfinished?

then, pick back up the book after six months, as though he could just finish me off whenever he so pleased?

“telling me what, calum?” i pressed, taking a step closer.

“telling you that i love you,” he nearly whispered it, as though he was scared of the confession, as though it would shift the entire world.

i blinked.

calum stared back at me, the hood in his eyes flooding over with confusion as the silence lingered on. “i…” he tried to find some new words, tried to fill the blanks, “i love you, y/n. i’ve loved you since i saw you at the bar that night. i- i haven’t been able to forget you, and i-“

“get out.”

calum’s words stalled. his lips sat parted, the unfinished sentences lingering on the tip of his tongue. he ran it over his lips, “what?”

i crossed my arms again, tightening the clutches, as if to hold myself together, to hold myself strong. i wasn’t going to give into this.

“get out. go. leave. go back to mexico and go play your stupid little concert,” my voice was low because i was afraid that if i spoke any louder, i would crack. i’d cry.

i’d tell him that i love him too.

but i just couldn’t.

“what-?” calum went to defend himself, to try to explain the situation.

but, i was shoving his shoulder. i was gathering his shoes, tossing his coat at him, opening the front door. he battled me, weakly, sputtering out useless words, twisting around to face me, though i kept pushing.

“leave me alone.”

remind her how it used to be with pictures in frames of kisses on cheeks.

i locked the door. calum’s shadow lingered on the porch, blackened against the light. i reached a finger up towards the button and shut the porch light off. i heard calum groan.

the tears fell down my cheeks.

i had spent the last six months getting over him.

i had spent hours in therapy, wondering why he had never picked me in the first place, why he had abandoned me like an unwanted path of his life.

i had grieved a relationship that never even got to exist, i had gotten over somebody who i never even had in the first place. i had rebuilt myself, i had redownloaded the dating apps. i was starting over.

i was moving on.

and now he was here and i felt like that naive girl from six months ago.

i went back to my desk. i crossed my legs, balanced my chin on my fist, and stared at my computer screen, blankly. my mind spurred with unwanted thoughts, my heart palpitating with emotions i had been used to not feeling for so long.

i typed out a few words for my essay, hoping it would stimulate the academic side of my brain. maybe if i focused on something else, i could pretend like tonight never even happened.

i continued on my assignment, until i reached a pass. there was a section of the reading that referenced another book. i needed to get it from my closet.

of course, while i was reaching for the textbook, a box, tucked far into the corner of my closet- the corner of my mind- came toppling down onto my head. i helped at the impact, rubbing the minor injury as i reached down for the shoebox.

my brows furrowed at the sight. when it rained, it poured.

i slowly lowered myself to my knees, shaking hands reaching out for the spilled contents of the box. pictures, ticket stubs, receipts, dry flower petals, a pop can tab, candy wrappers, a ring, and a thing of red lipstick.

calum and i, at the state fair, riding the carousel like we were just kids. kissing when we hit the top, and we could see the entire town. us at the diner, two straws for one milkshake, a plate of fries, and a song on the jukebox that we’d dance to every night he stayed over. in the recording studio, on the couch, sprawled out like old friends, listening to ash and luke argue over a single beat of a song, and discovering a pair of lyrics calum had written about me.

concerts, comedy shows, basketball tournaments, high school football games, recitals we had been to.

a print out of a plane ticket to australia for next month, now refunded in my bank account. a promise for a visit that would never come to fruition.

red roses for my birthday, red roses for my grade of an a in a hard class, red roses for a friday night dinner, red roses for a late night visit. red lipstick i’d wear when we went out, just to leave vibrant, still, stuck lip prints on his cheek.

tell her how you must have lost your mind when you left her all alone and never told her why. that’s how you lost the girl.

i gathered the items back into the box with hands that would not stop shaking. it took longer than it should have because i ruminated on every detail. i held every photo like a piece of glass, examining its contents like i could renter the moment and fix things before they broke.

i set the box on my bed, gently sitting down beside it. i didn’t know where to go, what to do. i needed to work things out, i needed to find an answer.

because i loved him, too.

i found myself reaching for my phone, dialing his number. i found myself under an umbrella, headed towards that old diner.

“thanks for meeting me.”

i wrapped my frozen fingers around the steaming cup of coffee, grateful for the radiating warmth. the air conditioning was still sputtering above us and i shivered.

“y-yeah,” i barely nodded, still unsure of what to say.

calum took a sip of his own coffee. he gulped. he licked his lips. he prodded at the ketchup bottle on our table with a stray straw. his eyes trailed over to the colorful machine on the table. “they raised the price of the jukebox.”

i followed his gaze. so they had. it used to be 50¢ per song. now it was $1.00.

“hm,” i remarked, staring at the dollar sign. “strange.”

“you didn’t know?” calum inquired, looking to me with a raised brow.

i shrugged, “i haven’t been here since…”

“july,” he filled in my gap. “it’s been…since july.”

“ah,” i nodded once. “seems like forever ago.”

“i know.”

a thick pass of silence sat stale in the air.

i nursed a few sips of my coffee. if he wanted, then he should talk. i would not be the one figuring this out. i would not beg him to make up for the loss he’d made me grieve.

eventually, he whispered, “i had to go.”

i flicked my eyes up to his before pulling them back down to the table. he dropped his head, chin against his chest, defeated. “i’m sorry. i’ll say it a million times- i’m sorry. i had to go. we- we decided last minute to announce the tour. there was a lot of bullshit we had to handle before starting it. and i, i don’t know…i didn’t want you to get caught up in the drama of it all. i didn’t want the world to get its hands on you…”

“so, you ghost me? you leave with no letter, no text, nothing?” i blinked back a tear. “wow…my knight in shining armor. thanks, calum.”

he huffed at himself, “no…i- listen, please-“

“no,” i denied him, “no, you listen, okay? i devoted myself to you for six months. i centered my whole life on you. i fell in love with you and i- gave you everything. because you were everything to me. and, i fucking waited and waited for you to say something, to tell me you wanted me, to ask me to drop everything and come with you because i would have! i would have gone to the ends of the earth with you because i loved you.

“and you left me,” i quickly brushed away tears as they rushed from my eyes, pattering against the table like the raindrops outside the diner window.

calum didn’t respond. he shuffled in his seat, leaning back, head dropping again.

and you know that i don’t want you to go. and say you want me.

i couldn’t handle it anymore. i’d given him a chance. i’d heard him out. his explanation just wasn’t enough for the heartbreak i’d had to handle.

so, i pushed up out of the booth, tugging my purse strap over my shoulder, my hood over my head. i veered for the door, passing our waitress with a half-hearted, “excuse me.”

i cursed the diner for being so big, for the exit to be on the other side of the building from where our usual table sat. i cursed that friday evening for drawing in so many customers to watch me, mascara blackening my cheeks, snot on my nose, storm like a baby from the restaurant.

just as my hand reached the bar on the door, the jukebox wound to life. the regular radio had been playing from the louder speakers because no one really paid for the old sound machine anymore. it didn’t have any modern songs, and it cost too much, apparently.

a familiar sultry beat came from the rusty speakers. my sneakers squeaked against the linoleum floors. i pushed the strap of my purse further up my shoulder. my heart tugged itself back towards the table, but i grounded the soles of my shoes.

i turned my head, caught his eye. he smiled, sadly. his hand had been cranking the knob on the quarter insert and it slowly dropped to the table. i glanced my eyes over the back of the diner, near the bathrooms, where a space sat for dancing, abandoned by the modern years. i saw two people dancing, consuming one another, lost in the thrill of it all. lost in the music.

and then you say i want you for worse or for better, i would wait forever and ever.

i crossed my arms over my chest and slowly walked back to the table. i slid back into the booth, dropping my purse down beside me.

“why did you leave?” i whispered, that heartbroken disbelief still heavy on my chest.

“i was scared,” calum admitted. he reached a hand across the table.

i leaned back, away from it. “of what?”

“of you,” he let out a breathy laugh. i didn’t smile. calum frowned again, searched for words, “i was scared of what loving you might mean. when we were here to record the album, we got to pretend like we were normal people for a while. i didn’t have to care about the pressure from the fans, staying sober, being a good person. life just came easy and naturally. but, if i left here with your heart in my hands- things would get hard. i wouldn’t be able to keep you distant from my real life. i wouldn’t be able to keep you sacred. nothing would be normal for us ever again.”

i understood it, now. i didn’t like it- i was still angry about it. but it made sense.

he wanted a peaceful love, but life made it so everything was rocky. not even i could prevent the world to taint this.

“i couldn’t…” calum trailed off. he reached out his hand again. “i can’t do it with out you anymore. i don’t care…”

he lost his words. i set a hand upon the table, fingers inching near his. he gratefully pressed his fingertips into mine, opening my palm. i stared at our hands. electricity crackled under my skin.

“i want you and i don’t care about the rest of the world. we’ll deal with it. we’ll figure it out. if it means losing you…these past six months have been hard. i’m sure you know what i mean…”

i nodded with a hopeless chuckle. “yeah, i do.”

broke your heart i’ll put it back together. i would wait forever and ever.

“i struggled with staying sober cause i just…i felt so stupid and worthless. i know i put you through so much pain. i know leaving was wrong and awful and i’ll never forgive myself for not even explaining it. i never want to…i never want to leave you again,” he was crying.

“calum, i…” i took his hand in both mine, “i don’t know. i’m just…you took so much of me with you. i had to learn how to exist without those parts of myself. i had to relearn who i was. i had to grieve her- us. it was so hard- you just left me. but…i don’t know. i need time. i need time to think and…”

“i know, i know, i know,” calum nodded quickly. “no, i know. i don’t expect…i don’t expect any answers. i don’t expect you to confess your feelings for me. i just…i needed to tell you that i love you. i couldn’t go another day without you knowing it. i needed to tell you and…and try to get you back.”

“well,” i glanced up from our hands, meeting his eye with a hopeful smile, “i think you got me.”

and that’s how it works. that’s how you got the girl.

[thesmilingfish]

So you wanna watch some of David Hewlett's pre-Stargate work?

I've compiled a list of everything that I could find that's available to stream for free (at least in the US) that he's done from 1987-2001.

If there are mistakes, links don't work or something is missing, please let me know.

Oh, and I didn't write the blurbs, some of which are pretty awful but as with a lot of you I've not seen everything on the list so I can't vouch for their veracity. If I have seen it, I'll include a little comment at the end with how much David is on screen or moments of interest.

Sites include: YouTube, Tubi, PlutoTV, Plex and Fawesome.

YouTube:

The Dark Side (1987) - A cab driver gets mixed up with a fare he picks up who turns out to be a adult film actress and she claims she has proof that the people she is working for are producing snuff films. Her claims seem to be validated when the cabbie notices suspicious looking people following them. (He's in a good portion of it but I remember being unimpressed with the movie as a whole.)

Night Heat - S3 E18 Simon Says (1987) - The exploits of the detectives of the Mid South Precinct, in a generic North American city not unlike New York (but a lot like Toronto), chronicled through the eyes of newspaper columnist Tom Kirkwood and his "Night Heat" column. (David plays a teenage prostitute. He's only in a few scenes spread out through the episode. It's a very dark subject matter so this isn't for everyone. Gotta say, 19-year-old David is beautiful.)

Friday the 13: The Series - S1 E10 Tales of the Undead (1988) - Ryan believes that a half-man, half-monster comic-book hero has come to life and is responsible for the murder of a shopkeeper. (He's in the first half of this cheesy, fun episode. He gets in a fight with Ray Walston - and loses.)

Pin (1988) - Isolated by his strange parents, Leon (DH) finds solace in an imaginary friend, which happens to be an anatomy doll from his father's doctor office. Unfortunately, the doll begins to take over Leon's life, and his sister's life as well. (He's the star and is creepy as fuck.)

My Secret Identity - S1 E2 A Walk on the Wild Side (1988) - The key component for Dr. J's latest invention is stolen by a group of wayward children. Andrew goes undercover and fakes loyalty to the gang in an attempt to recover the device, only to run into trouble when he meets the mastermind and leader of the gang, Rock (DH), who doesn't take too kindly to Andrew. (He's only in the end part of the episode but he's wearing a leather jacket playing a tough guy so you gotta watch it. Plus he's got a fight scene with Jerry O'Connell.)

T and T - S1 E16 Black and White (1988) - After his wife is attacked, Det. Jones thirsts for revenge. (He's playing another tough guy but this time he has great hair. AND he's got a fight scene with Mr. T.)

T and T - S2 E18 Thicker Than Water (1989) - The Brothers struggle to maintain their dance club only to be set upon by thugs, the neighborhood, the police, the Department of Health and the fire department. (OMG the hair! Big, black and reaching for the sky. You need to see it. The episode is actually pretty good and the band with the female lead singer is good too.)

The Penthouse (1989) - Dinah leads a charmed life with her father in a penthouse. Joe (DH), a friend from Dinah's past, breaks out of a mental hospital and into her penthouse to take her hostage. Can Dinah be saved while she tries to save Joe? (He's co-starring in this. He's suitably creepy. We get to see him wearing nothing but a towel and we get to see him juggle. Not at the same time.)

Where the Heart Is (1990) - A wealthy businessman shows his young-adult offspring how tough life can be. (He's one of the young adult offspring so he's in a fair amount of the movie. You've probably seen pictures/gifs from this where he's dressed like an angel flipping someone off or of his lovely bare posterior.)

Deep Sleep (1990) - Shelly, institutionalized following the death of her father, returns home desperate for answers about his death. Her memories return, revealing long-repressed dark family secrets. (He's the lead character's brother so he's in maybe a quarter of it. It's not a very good movie and David seems awkward in it.)

Scanners II: The New Order (1991) - A breed of humans known as The Scanners with dangerously powerful telepathic abilities are being recruited by a corrupt police commander in his crusade to take over the city. (I hate to say it, but the movie is kinda dull. I've put off watching it for ages because I was thinking it was going to be super gory and it really wasn't. There were a few gory bits but they weren't that well done which made is less gory somehow. His hair is styled badly and he's called 'pretty boy' twice I think but it kinda came out of the blue. Um, there's an adorable moment when DH heals a puppy but other than that it's kinda meh.)

Desire and Hell at the Sunset Motel (1991) - Right after Disneyland opens in Anaheim, California, in 1955, a toy salesman arrives in town a on for a toy convention. He brings his bored, beautiful wife with him. She's there so they can turn his business trip into a brief vacation, by planning a side excursion to visit Disneyland. They check into a nearby 1950s place four miles from Disneyland, a rundown place called the Sunset Motel, where affairs and sexual crimes among the motel guests quickly develop and cause trouble. But, that's not all, there's also get blackmail, beatnik style poetry, amnesia, and murder.

The First Circle (1991) - In the USSR, political prisoners who were scientists were not always sent to GULAG, but also to The First Circle (named after Dante's Inferno), a special incarceration unit near Moscow where they could work for the government. (This is uploaded into parts of about an hour a piece. The link is to the playlist.)

The Valour and the Horror (documentary) - S1 E1 A Savage Christmas: The Fall of Hong Kong (1992) - In the autumn of 1941, nearly 2,000 inexperienced Canadian soldiers were sent to Hong Kong at the request of the British government as a symbolic show of strength that would deter a Japanese attack on the colony. Canada's soldiers found themselves in the midst of a desperate battle they could not hope to win. (He only has a couple of moments on screen where he's playing a soldier reenacting letters home, but he's fantastic. The episode itself is very intense, so consider yourself forewarned.)

The Quiet Killer aka Black Death (1992) - When a teenage daughter of a wealthy New York City family returns home while feeling sick, nobody suspects a thing. At home, her health deteriorates quickly, resulting in a painful death on the streets before her Manhattan home. In the hospital, it does not take long before its discovered she's died of the bubonic plague and then its a race against the clock to locate and treat all the people who might be infected. (He plays a journalist who's after the truth! He's in the last half of the movie and has a couple nifty moments. He's got good chemistry star Kate Jackson.)

Forever Knight - S1 E10 Dead Air (1992) - Nick and Schanke are on the hunt for a deranged killer (DH) who brags about his crimes on a psychiatrist's radio show. Meanwhile, Nick has constant flashbacks to 1440 when he watched LaCroix torture a man for his own ends. (Back to creepy. But also poignantly broken.)

Split Images (1992) - A journalist knows more about a grizzly murder than is good for her. All her evidence points toward a mysterious millionaire but no one will believe her. (He's in maybe 2 minutes total, playing a cop, near the end of the movie but he's adorable. It was actually not a bad little made-for-TV-movie with Gregory Harrison taking on the creepy lead character duties.)

The Boys of St. Vincent: 15 Years Later - Fifteen years after the events of The Boys of St. Vincent took place, the various boys involved are brought in to testify against the brothers, now finally standing trial, who assaulted them when they were children. They are faced with revisiting the abuse and trauma they sustained as children.

Shining Time Station - S3 E4 Stacy Cleans Up, S3 E23 The Mayor Runs for Re-Election - At seemingly a ordinary train station in a small American town, extraordinary things happen including a tiny man called "Mr. Conductor" who tells stories about Thomas the Tank Engine and his friends. (He is so freaking cute with this huge black rim framed glasses. He also appears to be having a great time.)

Silent Witness: What a Child Saw aka Blood Brothers (1993) - A prosecutor tracks a gang murder to a Los Angeles youth who could name his own brother.

Monster Force (1994) - In the near future, Monster Force, a team of six teenager monster hunters, battle Creatures of the Night, monsters lead by the classic Universal monsters like Dracula, the Mummy, Wolfman and the Creature from the Black Lagoon. (The link is to a playlist which contains all of the animated episodes.) (This is a cute Saturday morning cartoon that I probably would have been into big time if I was in their target audience. It's hecka fun.)

Traders (1996-2000) - The show explores the intimate lives and loves of investment bankers whose high-stakes decisions and sizzling alliances can have grave international consequences. (The link is to a playlist which only contains the first two seasons.) (I've only seen the first season and David is heartbreaking in it. As I remember there's lots of close-ups of his eyes showcasing just have vulnerable Grant is. All five seasons are available to stream at Fawesome!)

Elevated (1996) - Ben and Ellen are thrust into adventure when Hank (DH), a blood covered security man of the building rushes into their elevator, claiming that there's a dangerous creature in the building. (This is a fantastic short film - it's like 15 minutes long. It's not super scary but it has moments of tension and David is fantastic. It's directed by Vincenzo Natali, who also directed the movie Cube.)

Cube (1997) - Seven strangers of widely varying personality are involuntarily placed in an endless maze containing deadly traps. (Very scary. Very disturbing. And oh so good.)

On the 2nd Day of Christmas (1997) - Trish (Mary Stuart Masterson) and her six-year-old niece, Patsy, make their living by picking pockets. But when they try to take advantage of holiday shoppers with fat wallets, they run into a little snag—a department store security guard named Bert (Mark Ruffalo) catches them in the act. The store owner wants them arrested, but decides to wait until Christmas is over. To ensure they don’t make a run for it, he entrusts their care to Bert. (David is featured in the subplot and is in quite a lot of this one but honestly after the first time I saw it I just skip to his scenes. Sort of has a fight scene with the Hulk, Mark Ruffalo. Wears a cast, a Santa suit and black hi-top Chucks throughout the movie.)

Clutch (1998) - Martyn (DH), an aging Toronto area college student with no degree yet to show for his so far ten years in college, has agreed to do an illegal job solely for the money: steal a rare book. In the process, Martyn ends up accidentally killing the owner. Not knowing what to do about the dead body, Martyn decides to take it along with the book.

Survivor (1999) - An Arctic oil rig crew discovers something strange far beneath the Earth's surface, which may or may not be responsible for the series of murders that begin to take place. (The plot is one we've all seen before, but it has a cast that is solid and it held my attention. It's a made-for-TV movie so very little gore, just a couple of bits of blood. It's mostly character reactions to what they're seeing. David has several nice moments with a character that's funny, endearingly awkward, exasperated, smart, reluctantly brave...)

The Life Before This (1999) - Several innocent bystanders are injured or killed when two robbers, fleeing from the police, run into the neighborhood cafe.

Chasing Cain (2001) - The drive-by shooting of a doctor and a woman who work at an abortion clinic leads Detectives to a suspect with ties to the pro-life movement.

And Never Let Him Go (2001) - The true story of a woman's suspicious disappearance after ending an affair with a powerful, married attorney. (This is one of my favorite mini-series. I giffed it a lot back in the day. Mark Harmon is marvelous as the creepy lead with David playing his baby brother. Oh and we get Paul Michael Glaser as a detective. Good stuff.)

The Triangle (2001) - A group of friends wind up in the Bermuda Triangle. (Eh. I've seen it twice and I can't tell you much about it. We get David in shorts wearing a bucket hat though so that's nice.)

Treed Murray (2001) - An advertising executive (DH), trapped in a tree by a gang of would-be muggers, manipulates them into fighting in order to save his life.

PlutoTV

The Penthouse (1989)

Scanners II: The New Order (1991)

Cube (1997)

Tubi

The Penthouse (1989)

T and T - "Black and White" (S1 E16), "Thicker Than Water (S2 E18)

Scanners II: The New Order (1991)

The Valour and the Horror - S1 E1 A Savage Christmas: The Fall of Hong Kong (1992)

Tropical Heat - S3 E19 Object of Desire (1993)

Silent Witness: What a Child Saw aka Blood Brothers (1993)

Ultraforce - S1 E1 Prime Time (1995)

Plex

Scanners II: The New Order (1991)

Desire and Hell at the Sunset Motel (1991)

Silent Witness: What a Child Saw aka Blood Brothers (1993)

Cube (1997)

Fawesome

Scanners II: The New Order (1991)

Traders (1996-1999) - They have all 5 seasons of the show

Silent Witness: What a Child Saw (1993) - also known as Blood Brothers

Cube (1997)

Treed Murray (2001)

**********************************************************************

If there's interest, I can do a 2002-2025 reference list with links to free streaming sites of his work as well. (Or any of the Stargate actors actually.)

And if you haven't done so yet, go vote in my poll please.

[istadris]

Trailer Analysis of Asterix & Obelix The Big Fight (Part 1) : Reference to the original comics

Part 2

So with the upcoming Netflix mini-series, we have much to look forward to. It's the first time the Asterix franchise is adapted as a serial, instead of a collection of separate adventures or a full-length movie (animated or live-action)

But it's not the first time the Big Fight gets adapted to the screen : in 1989, an animated movie combined the plots of the Big Fight (mostly Getafix becoming insane thanks to a menhir to the head) and the Soothsayer (with the character of Prolix and his subplot), leaving out the subplot of the Big Fight (the Chief's Fight in the French version).

The Netflix series has already some credentials : Alain Chabat, who's behind this series, is well known to the Asterix fandom for his job on Asterix : Mission Cleopatra, the live action adaptation of Asterix and Cleopatra, very fondly remembered if only for being the source of a thousand memes in France and Poland.

One can wonder how this series will handle the challenge. What will it keep from the original comic ? What will change? What can we expect ?

Thanks to the trailers, we may already have some answers to these questions. Let's delve into it this with this three-part analysis.

We already know from the official synopsis of the series that the Getafix Amnesia plot will happen. For those who might have gotten distracted and need a reminder : while gathering herbs in the forest, Getafix gets attacked by Romans trying to capture him (as they have finally understood that without the druid, the Gauls don't have access to the magic potion anymore). In an attempt to rescue him, Obelix throws a menhir, which scatters the Romans but knocks Getafix out, causing him to lose his memory and mind.

This incident makes the Big Fight (in which a Gaul chief challenges another for the leadership of his tribe) particularly dangerous for the indomitable Gauls, as the Romans enroll the collaboration* of Ceramix, a very strong Gallo-Roman chief completely devoted to the Roman cause, and convincing him to challenge Vitalstatistix.

In the comic, it was actually to make sure Ceramix had a chance to win that the Romans tried to kidnap Getafix

*I'm using that term on purpose

I'll explain a bit further how the series seems to expand on that bit, but it's clear that the one-page gag of a traveling carnival quickly setting up to capitalize on the fame of the Big Fight is present in the show, and will have a much bigger role in the series.

Tree patrol shows up! Owl Tree Roman shows up !! Maybe we can expect the Potion Testing subplot to happen (although it might be a bit too morally questionable to include)

Some people pointed out the similitude of a couple of shots with a scene of the Chieftain's Shield, which deals with Vitalstatistix having a sore liver after overeating and needing to have a water cure.

Obviously the series won't have enough time to deal with the actual plot of the Chieftain's Shield (Asterix&Obelix racing against Romans to find Vercingetorix's famous shield), but my personal theory is that the series starts with Vitalstatistix having a sore liver and being ordered to leave for a water cure, even packing his stuff (as shown in the shot below) before the menhir situation happens and shifts drastically priorities. It could be a gag situation to introduce the characters and humour, or it could have an actual impact on the plot, as Vitalstatistix isn't as strong as he used to be and might need to find a champion for the Big Fight.

A little yet charming bonus : Asterix' pose in this shot is very familiar to anyone who has read the comics

And also, seems like Alain Chabat couldn't resist referencing a gag from Mission Cleopatra, where Caesar tosses raisins to catch in his mouth but keeps failing

So, the series seems intent on being faithful and paying homage to the comics.

But!

It still has its own surprises. New elements, changes to the plot to fit a 5 episodes format episode instead of a 40 pages comic.

These will be explored in the next part of this analysis!

[gaykarstaagforever]

Heathers (1989)

"If everyone jumped off a bridge, would you?"

"...Probably."

[TRIGGER WARNING: The movie is about murder, suicide, depression, anxiety and bullying, and it's a Rated-R movie from 1989, so SA is going to keep coming up. I'm going to be referencing all of that in this review. Also I'm a gay man and will be teasing people who have made this movie their personality, so tap out now if you and your cool vinyl collection can't deal with that.]

The movie starts as a fun black comedic take-down of saccharine 80s John Hughes teen romance movies. New-kid-in-school badboy edgelord JD, and repentant former wannabe cool girl Veronica, hook up and decide to live out the ultimate bullied nerd fantasy by getting revenge on Heather, Veronica's frenemy and leader of the Heathers, the most popular clique in school.

But when things go darker than Veronica planned, the comedic satire becomes a Shakespearean melodrama, as Veronica is suddenly confronted by the surreal consequences of what she's done, including realizing that the simplest solution to a problem may in fact make everything a hell of a lot worse.

I'm not going to spoil it for the 5 of you who haven't seen this yet. Everyone else (including me now) has seen it, as it is probably one of the most universally-popular Internet-culture movies there is. You've seen at least one meme from it.

Probably this one.

While a flop in 1989, it quickly became a cult movie on home media, even by the late 90s being one of those movies your older brother and his friends introduced you to to let you know they didn't think you were a lame stupid baby anymore. And it seems now with streaming it is still kind of in that spot, the older brothers with tapes being replaced by Gen X / Millennials posting about how cool it is in front of teenaged lurkers.

So how did I miss it? I WAS the older brother growing up, and I was 7 when it came out. And when I did go back and get into all the 80s movies I missed out on by being a toddler when they were new, I stumbled into the Hughes stuff, notably Pretty in Pink, which is fundamentally the movie Heathers is mocking. As cynical and jaded as I am, I'm also a fruitcake, so I love me some sappy sunny crap (if it's to a greater artistic point, which the Hughes movies are). What I knew of Heathers had me thinking it was merely a demonstration of pretentious anti "popular media" whining from the sort of people who wear outdated hats and are insufferable about punk music.

...And it totally is. But also, it's more than that. It's actually really good and smart and occasionally insightful, when it restrains itself from all the emo "I can be your devil or your angle" posturing. Which, to be fair, it also makes fun of. Before that was even a thing.

Christian Slater and Wynonna Rider have fantastic chemistry, and there's never enough of the two of them just enjoying each other's company. Even when they're arguing, it feels like a real couple going through something they'll almost certainly get over in a few hours (until they very much can't, and then they'll literally try to kill each other). Passion, is the word for it. Sardonic and low-key most of the time, but still passion. And that's always delightful.

It's well-shot and well-directed, with good uses of lighting and dynamic camera angles. There is a lot of scenes that are just two people talking, and it's never boring. Impressive for filmmakers who were, at the time, fresh-faced and working with a small budget. The style ends up being like if John Waters (no relation to Dan Waters, who wrote it) had directed Corman's Rock and Roll High School: goofy and surreal and sarcastic, but also willing to get dark and push boundaries to make a point.

All the characters - even joke side ones - are thoughtfully drawn, given emotional depth and realistic motivations, even when they're doing something stagey and broad in this highly stylized, Tim Burton-esque dark fairytale world. Wynonna Rider fought for the role against all advice, and it is perfectly in-line with the characters she played and the movies she played them in of this era, Beetlejuice and Edward Scissorhands. Maybe even Bram Stoker's Dracula, if we're talking surreal melodramatic action-horror with disco lighting.

It is a movie with lots of big ideas (probably too many), but it manages to get those across effectively. What starts as a simple teenager revenge fantasy morphs into an armchair analysis of what America does to its children - instead of nurturing them and preparing them for the adult world, it points at them and gawks, and cashes in on their fear and self-loathing and predictable self-destruction. Everyone in the cruel high school world of Heathers is both a perpetrator and a victim, desperately fighting for survival by both submitting to abuse, and then immediately turning around and heaping it on someone "beneath" them. Death here isn't genuinely mourned or reflected upon; everyone simply starts plotting how they're going to exploit this new gap in the line. And whether the victims kill themselves or are murdered only matters as far as someone can spin that into self-promotion. Even the priest at the funeral (the late great Glenn Shadix, Beetlejuice again!) uses the supposed suicide of a child as an opportunity to make a ham-fisted youth-oriented alter call.

By the end of the movie, Veronica has triumphantly decided to rise up - not merely against the popular kids and exploitative / apathetic adults - but against the entire system of unending cruelty she didn't even know she was still playing a part in when she was actively attacking it. This finally sets her at odds with JD, who is too consumed by hatred to realize that the violence he thinks is a solution is fundamentally part of the problem.

And yet, as they come to blows, Veronica is also replaying the very same game that led her to become one of the Heathers in the first place, and then turn on them: use people to secure power, they use and hurt you, so you attack them. She knows the whole system is bad and broken and wants out, and seems to acknowledge the only way out is through earnest friendships and "growing out" of being shallow and petty. But by the end of the movie, despite her rebuke of JD...has she managed it? Maybe, maybe not. Maybe the system is inescapable, and all you can hope to do is find a way to force it to work for you. And choose then to make it less cruel. Maybe.

It's not a good or happy ending, it's just an ending. But a thought-provoking one, and the movie does it well.

...Mostly. The dialogue is trying very hard to be distinctively witty, but mostly comes across like a worse version of Clueless-ese, with more gratuitous vulgarities and no kitschy charm. A writer being very proud of how smart they are, without noticing that real people don't talk like this because it's awkward and obnoxious. Everyone's dialogue is basically interchangeable, including between the kids and adults (JD and his lunatic father have a fun distinctive thing they do, but that's about it). Now, lines being awkward and obnoxious doesn't mean they aren't eminently meme-able. In fact, that usually means they are. And they certainly are here. Nearly every scene has a memorable bon mot that can be endlessly parroted by people doing that so you won't notice their off-putting personality. ...I wouldn't call that a win for anyone, but it is certainly a thing.

Remember: just because someone said it in a movie, doesn't mean it's inherently funny or profound or relevant to the conversation you've currently having. And you're not suddenly smart because you found a movie quote that you think expresses your exceptional hot take. In fact, that might be a sign that your are NOT in fact smart or insightful. Just putting that out there.

Also the "mineral water is for fags" thing is only funny because it's stupid. It was stupid then. That's the point of that being in the movie, to show how stupid these podunk morons in Ohio are. Stop repeating that 'joke.' It isn't funny out of context.

Gen X. Looking at you on this one. It's just you trying to give yourselves permission to still call people "fags." Doesn't work that way.

Christian Slater claims he was "channeling Jack Nicholson for this film." Yeah, okay, dude. And for the rest of your life, all the time. He's still a good actor and very charming here, but if that "Christian Slater" thing he does annoys you, it's at 11 here.

The pacing and tone get pretty muddled after the initial black revenge comedy stuff stops, as the movie uneasily transitions to its second major focus. It stops being funny entirely for awhile, until near the end when it suddenly remembers that was supposed to be a part of this, then sitcomy stuff elbows its way in. And JD's plans post-breakup with Veronica are left vague until they suddenly aren't, and I feel like I missed something. I didn't, and there's a point to them doing it this way, but it is handled kind of confusingly.

The movie is a scaled-down version of whatever epic Greek tragicomedy the writer originally dreamed up, and the studio demanded the pitch-black orginal ending be changed. And you can kind of feel that throughout. As an R-rated movie it is a lot tamer than it feels like it should be, and I for one wish the kills were gorier and more over-the-top. That more fits the tone. Maybe that was never the original intention, but you don't do Titus Andronicus without getting gross with it, you know?

Any SA stuff is handled tactfully, and there isn't much of it, and it serves a narrative purpose. But that still feels like something that is only in here because it's 1989 and R-rated movies have to go there. And I don't feel like they really give those incidents the kind of emotional impact they should have on the victims. But again, this is a surreal world of unending cruelty, so maybe people shrug that off here. It's more my personal preference, if you're going to be gross to women in a movie (probably stop that, unless that's what the movie is about. Rape and molestation are not screenplay spices.)

The good far outweighs the bad, though. And Heathers is good, and is deservedly a timeless cult-classic for growing boys and girls, given what it deals with and how well it deals with it. It's entertaining and it makes you think, which is what good movies do. And it's endlessly meme-able, and that's okay, even if the people who meme it the most are silently warning you that they're pretentious and annoying about music. And that's only sort-of the movie's fault.

Also all the women in this movie have 9 lbs of dry fly-away hair that is just...painful. I realize this "unkempt Barbie hair" style was the best we could do at the time, but... I feel like I can hear it crunching every time they move.

Oh, and shoulder pads for days, shoulder pads FOREVER. I will never understand why the hell the 80s thought women weren't boxy enough. It was a thing.