#159. together we'll make it & reach for the stars — teyuki (ingenxum)

[hxlfsoul]

birthday asks / @ingenxum​: "Happy birthday Fuyuki-kun!" And here comes a bear hug from his loveable boyfriend, blushing like crazy as his arms wrapped around the other. Tetsuya kissed his forehead before giving him a small wrapped gift. Inside was a figurine of Fuyuki inside his hero costume made out of clay. Definitely hand crafted since there's his little signature.

THAT WAS EXTREMELY KIND & HE OFFERED A GENTLE SMILE, almost dropping the figure when it was handed to him, fingers scrambling to keep a tight hold of it, sure that Tetsuya would be crushed if he didn’t treat it with the most care he had ever given anything. ❝You didn’t have to, you know? I’d have been happy just going on a date or something.❞ His whispered words would have sounded much like a complaint to anyone that could not see the rosiness of his cheeks & the expression on his face as he opened the gift, eyes staring at it in awe. ❝I’ll treasure this for the rest of my life, ‘suya!❞

( aren’t you so childish? nags their mind as they wrap an arm around the other, burying their face into his shoulder. will you ever grow up? )

[hxlfsoul]

@ingenxum

HE DID NOT KNOW THIS PERSON WHO STOOD IN FRONT OF HIM & SPOKE WITH THE VOICE OF A LOST LOVE. Iida Tetsuya looked as nice as ever, Fuyuki could note, & he wondered how he’d changed, when the love in his eyes had faded & all he could see was the lack of recognition that twisted his anger around deep inside & he wanted them to burn, wanted to set every person who took him away alight with nothing but his agony — it had felt like half his soul was missing, even though he had already been half of a soul. 

( fire & ice, shoto & fuyuki, destruction & creation melded into two separate beings with personalities to match & he wonders if his coldness was what took tetsuya away from him in the end, if he wasn’t kind enough to deserve him so the universe took away what little happiness he had left. )

❝Cicatrize.❞ His voice trembles under the weight of the word he had gifted his lover so long ago & he wonders if there are tears in his eyes or if he simply imagines the wetness on his cheeks — he raises a hand to wipe at nothing, staring down at it with a look that can only be described as despair for how can he not cry over someone he adored so much? Was he truly so heartless he couldn’t shed a single tear more?

The beat of his heart is an orchestra, he is privy to his own private symphony of melancholy, his own tragedy as it is written — this is a tragedy, he knows, for there is nothing but a cacophony of bells ringing in his ears & it is melancholic, it is broken & jagged & no sounds are quite the same as they spell out his death & his sadness & the life he will live without a single moment of joy left to be squeezed out of it.

❝What brings you here? I wouldn’t have thought you’d be associating with the smaller members of the organisation.❞ If he were one for socialising, Fuyuki would have seen him long ago & perhaps it would not hurt so much, to see the blankness in his eyes when he stared at him & he wonders if Tetsuya recalls anything: the white of his hair, the grey of his eyes, blankness & loneliness & colours that were easy enough to overlook — forgettable at best & he knew that because if he were so important, if he stood out more, then Tetsuya would not have forgotten him.

He holds out a hand & holds in a breath as he waits to see the other’s reaction, stares at him with a mixture of hope & uncertainty tainting his brightness, the gentle hold he once had held no longer kind but replaced with a heat that was not his to keep. ❝Kapel.❞ His own introduction is a simple word & it is quiet, as if he is speaking with shyness out of necessity rather than because he wishes to & that’s wrong, everything is wrong, but he cannot speak louder & he cannot let himself emote because he cannot fall into those pits of despair any longer.

( he is melt-water, his gentleness at least. it falls from his fingertips & rolls into the ground during the spring, it is the melting of the ice & the person he is underneath & who he could have been. it is love that falls from those eyes in the form of tears & it is love so easily stolen from him, but he does not speak of the reasoning for his name — one day, when his love returns into his arms & speaks his name, perhaps spring will finally have thawed his soul & summer will embrace him like the harshness of the winter did. )