#115. ❝synthesised & transformed; pathetic lifeform.❞ — V1 ( wanderer )

[decoysouled]

a meme from the old blog // not accepting. @apocryphis // ❝ we all have something bad in us. ❞ (kazuha for arakan)

& MAYBE THAT'S TRUE — maybe everyone ( gods, humans, those that exist in between, regardless of whether they wish to ) has skeletons in their closet & souls that are sin-blackened, unable to ever truly be cleansed. Arakan wants to agree, they truly do, but they aren't so sure that many people ( if any ) have the same type of bad that exist within them.

( the way grief turned to an anger that was enough to destroy so much, that had hollowed them out until nothing else remained... how many people have done the things i've done? how many others cannot atone for their sins? how many others can't forgive themselves from the past that they are chained to? )

They wonder, really, if he actually understands the extent of the bad that consumed them so long ago — where death was viewed as abandonment, where pain was necessary to divinity, where they clung to the belief that godhood would fill the void in their heart that was left when Ei had abandoned them so long ago.

Arakan knows the only way they ever filled that abyss was with cruelty, with a desire to hurt others. Nowadays, they feel more empty than anything in the places where anger once festered. They aren't sure if it's any better.

❝Sure.❞ Their words aren't an agreement, noncommittal as they may seem, as Arakan turns their gaze away from him. ❝Because most people are terrible enough to make the choices I would, right?❞ It's not a serious question, the words dripping with sarcasm — even if it weren't obvious by their tone, Arakan has no doubt Kazuha would still have seen through them.

He seems to manage that a lot of time, really.

❝Look, I don't doubt that most people have done bad things, but I'm sure humans are pretty talented at balancing that out with good, much as I hate to say it.❞ & then there were the people who balanced out others, who did so much good that humanity could not simply be judged as bad, regardless of one's experience. Even that they can freely admit. & perhaps gods are the same, for every bit of Ei's detachment was balanced by Nahida's benevolence.

But what of those like them? Could anything truly balance out the actions of a puppet when so few others exist like them, if any do at all? They doubt it & even if that were possible, Arakan's sins would follow them until the end of time, haunting their soul, woven into them like threads.

There was nothing that would ever destroy the malignity that was intertwined with everything they have ever been & everything they would ever become.

❝But not everyone, not everything, has good in it. I'd say that's the more important thing, isn't it? To have a redeeming quality?❞ They question, hesitance evident in the pause between this questions & the words that came before it. ❝You've got more good in you than anything else, I'd say, so maybe you're underestimating just how much bad is in me, if you're trying to... connect with me, or whatever this is.❞

( i don't know if i'm capable of good. )

❝Don't burden yourself with trying to see something other than a sinner in me, Kaedehara, or you might drive yourself insane trying to see something that isn't there & never has been.❞ They murmur, as if concerned for him — they aren't worried, really, but more for the outcome: that he will search for good in them & find nothing & still forgive them when they don't deserve it.

( or that he will find something good in them & they will spend the rest of their life wondering how anything good could exist in a creature like them. )

[decoysouled]

unprompted asks // accepting // @resolutepath. "It seems Lesser Lord Kusanali has asked you to be my company for this venture..." Observant gaze studies the other - the Hat Guy, as others have so aptly named, a Wanderer to others - before Alhaitham hums, judgement made. They seem capable, that much was clear from the Interdarshan Championship, so he holds no worry as to merit or their capabilities to keep up, only willingness to endure and listen to his lead. Arguing with others on such trips is exhausting when it contradicts well laid plans. "I assume you have been informed of the necessary arrangements. Are there any questions you have before we move forward...?"

MANY MORTALS WERE INCOMPETENT — grandiose in their ideals & lacking true self-awareness when it comes to their, typically rather evident, lack of ability. Although Arakan is no fonder of humanity now than they were before becoming Lord Kusanali's prisoner, they are capable of admitting that Alhaitham is far less troublesome & arrogant than other scholars, in that he is at least knowledgeable of his limits.

Or so Arakan has heard from others in pieces of conversations they have had the displeasure of picking up on while roaming the House of Daena in search of learning materials.

It is second nature for the puppet to bristle when he speaks, albeit at least he has inferred that it was Nahida's wishes that they join rather than Arakan having had any choice in the first place. It is only because they owe her a debt that they go along with her whims, however ridiculous they are, & they are sure she abuses the privilege. That is, if she is even aware it exists at all.

( they doubt she would do so knowingly, kind & benevolent as she is. a far cry from other gods in their experience. )

While they are typically one to speak their mind, no matter the party involved, they have found there is no point in such a thing when some people are involved — some are too sensitive to handle it & they have little sympathy for people who have no need for a tough outer shell, whilst others think themselves to know more than anyone else & so will not listen, regardless of how unreasonable they are being compared to other parties.

They wonder, briefly, where Alhaitham falls into that spectrum, as someone who seems neither sensitive nor as if he believes himself above the rest of his kind. As much as they still detest humans, Arakan is rather eager to find an answer.

❝Asking me to keep you company is putting it nicely.❞ Arakan states eventually, almost reluctant to engage in any form of conversation for the time being. Most days, any time spent in the company of others was silent, a lack of interest defining each moment they dreaded of being around people. Exceptions had a tendency to be far & few between, people who they were indebted to rather than genuine care being the driving factor for them existing at all.

One day, when those debts are paid, they would live a blissful life away from mortals & gods alike, & the many ways they knew how to betray. Or perhaps, at the end of all, they would learn to co-exist. For now, they don't know.

For now, they don't particularly care, either.

❝With the way she phrased it, it sounded more as if I was being asked to babysit a wayward child.❞ Perhaps it is an unnecessary statement, & also not quite true, but the way Nahida spoke of her people had a tendency to remind them of the ways humans would speak of a cat they were particularly fond of. Then again, it was quite different from how she spoke to them, who she seemed to believe was far more cat-like than any of her subjects.

Such an opinion also had yet to change, much to Arakan's dismay.

❝She told me everything I needed to know, in her expert opinion.❞ The words almost drip with disdain, albeit it is more feigned & borne of annoyance than any dislike toward the dendro archon. ❝If I had any questions, I would ask her, not you. As much as I'm sure you're so great at answering people, I doubt you're willing to waste your breath speaking to me more than you deem necessary. You can forego the pleasantries, I don't care for them.❞

There is a part of their words that is almost taunting, as if they are daring him to prove them wrong. They find they aren't interested in the result for anything other than the entertainment it may bring.

[decoysouled]

prompts for touch-starved muses // accepting. @maquiscursed // [ doze ] sender falls asleep with their head on receiver's shoulder (and nahida to arakan!)

IF ONE WERE TO ASK ARAKAN IF THEY CARED FOR NAHIDA, they would likely reject the idea as if it were a personal offence to imply they enjoyed the company of their jailor — or that of any archon, for that matter, considering their strong dislike for the divine, a product of the life they have lived, erased from the world's memory yet so prominent in their own. Abandoned by one god & accepted by another, an irony that they had once laughed at & now could not seem to bear.

( to those that know them, it would be the most untrue statement they had ever spoken. it was good, then, that very few people truly knew them beyond the pseudonym of hat guy & their forced participation in academics. )

Yet there is no place for hatred in their daily routine of cooking for her nor in the way they handle books with gentleness, seeking knowledge as if to be a better helper for the goddess who guides them. There is no place for hatred in the way they treat her as if she is family — an older sister who takes care of them & in return, they do their best to do what they can for her.

( they are unsure of whether family is meant to be like this. they do not ask for the opinion of others, either. )

There is no room for hatred right now, either, in the way she rests her head on their shoulder as they flick through the pages of a book they have borrowed from the House of Daena, sharp gaze taking in each & every word as if they would miss something if they dared to skim through the sentences. & there is no hatred in the way they let her sleep, glancing over from time to time as if to check if she's alright, but making no move to wake her.

( it is better that they allow her to rest. )

❝Next time, you'll find a real bed a little more comfortable.❞ It is spoken more to themself than anything, for she is asleep & dead to the world, albeit it is surely a suggestion sparked of their own concerns for her. Nonetheless, their voice is quiet, an attempt to avoid waking her as they speak to an empty room & disturb the tranquillity that is growing a little too comfortable. ❝I hope you're having good dreams, at least, Nahida.❞

( & even if they could not protect her in the world of dreams, they would do so in the one outside of it. )

[decoysouled]

unprompted asks // accepting // @momdstadt. " Excuse me... " Her words came out in more of a whisper. Layla tapped on the other's shoulder gently, one hand still holding onto her few books as she did so. Golden gaze sweeping over him, she couldn't recognize him & wasn't quite pinpointing what Darshan he might be a part of. But regardless, all the other tables in the library had quickly filled up with other students looking to study. Once she was sure she had his attention she continued. " I'm sorry, would it be okay if I sit here with you? I'll sit on the other side of the table as to not disturb you. " A nervous tone to her inquiry. ( for Arakan! )

IT SEEMS THAT NO MATTER WHAT THEY DO, their self-imposed seclusion would always be interrupted. In such a public place as the House of Daena, surely anyone could find an empty table or twelve — yet it seems another human has gravitated toward them despite their best efforts to look intimidating enough that the scholars would run at the first sight of their glare like the cowards they were supposed to be. It's a shame, in their opinion, that the students of the Akedemiya have begun ignoring Arakan's annoyance regardless of whether it's on show or not.

( more & more it seems they treat arakan like some sort of socially challenged loner who didn't know how to make friends. or a weird cat with a tendency to bite the hand that feeds it. it's absurd. )

It can't hurt to allow her to sit by them, at the very least, considering the books in front of them ( those they so diligently seem to be reading ) have been open to the same page for the last half hour, their eyes scanning people in the crowd in lieu of studying for their thesis. It isn't as if they want to be here, after all, considering the only reason they even have academic work to do in the first place is because of Nahida's intervention — it is part of their prison sentence, they suppose.

Even if she never truly saw them as a prisoner. Even if they haven't seen themself as one in a short while. They still owe her a debt, whether she intends to collect on it or not, & the thesis is simply their way of repaying her. Or avoiding her inevitable disappointment, considering she had stated she would personally read it.

( for a moment, they wonder if they should ask what the person in front of them is writing. they banish the idea of pleasantries & casual conversation as quickly as it arrives. )

❝Haven't you already disturbed me by interrupting me?❞ There is a lack of true annoyance in their voice, the question asked more to see what reply it would garner & whether it would be as ridiculous as most mortal excuses were. ❝You're here to ask forgiveness rather than permission. Anyone could see that.❞ Save for the fools that seemed to make up the majority of humans these days. Then again, perhaps this is one of the many odd behaviours they cannot understand.

( as they are more machine than human, more divine than mortal. yet ordinary all the same. )

❝The pleasantries hum- people.❞ Their correction of their language is something they hope goes unnoticed, if only because the questions it would likely lead to were not the sort Arakan enjoyed answering. Nor would they bother to, regardless of the outcome. ❝Come up with are truly astounding. Why not just sit down rather than asking? I wouldn't even notice if I were as engrossed in my work as a good student should be.❞

( as someone who wasn't there against their will would be goes unspoken. )

❝You might as well just sit rather than idling nearby, anyway. Regardless of my feelings on your existence, I'd bet you probably have important work to do — but is it actually important or have you just convinced yourself of that to feel like your life has a purpose? Do tell. Indulge me.❞ The words are accompanied by a sharp smile, the sort of which one might find to be threatening, or perhaps menacing. It has always seemed unnerving at best to those, save for those who ( for some reason they could not figure out ) actually wanted to spend time with them.

Perhaps it is a personal question, the sort which might make her uncomfortable — & by all means, they hope it does. After all, humans had a tendency to escape a situation that was filled with discomfort & taking advantage of that would lead to the return of their beloved isolation once more.

Or so they hope.

[decoysouled]

IF THERE WAS ONE THING ARAKAN KNEW, it was that Cyno didn't ask a lot of them when it came to promises — they wonder, really, if he knows its because they are not one to promise anything ( although they find themself promising him more than anyone else they have ever known ) or if he simply isn't the type to ask much of others in the first place.

They find that they don't particularly care which reason is the truth, if only because it doesn't matter.

❝Why would I need to say it again if you won't forget?❞ They counter, if only for the sake of it — they've no plans to deny him such a simple request, in the end. ❝I'll consider repeating it one day, it's not exactly a monumental task, but don't get too used to me being so nice.❞

Words couldn't be more striking. They even took Cyno slightly off-guard. His readiness came less, and the General raised his head to stare back at Arakan with a grateful softness in his eyes.

"If I promise to not forget, will you in return swear to say that again, someday? I think that is the sweetest thing I've been told in a very long time."

[decoysouled]

TAG DUMP // ARAKAN.

[decoysouled]

WHILE THEY MAY KNOW WHAT HE MEANT, there is a certain satisfaction they take in the look of defeat on Albedo's face, if only for a moment before their expression becomes something more similar to disinterest — however feigned it may be.

❝If you think that's what I would be worried about, if I were worried at all, then you're mistaken.❞ Arakan refutes his words with ease, lips downturned into a slight scowl, the sort of sourness that is most commonly seen on their face. ❝I'm keeping an eye of our surroundings. Nothing more, nothing less.❞ They're used to having to keep an eye on everything around them, after all, & it feels odd not to.

❝I'll try a bit harder not to interrupt your sketching, if you're still looking to continue with it. It's not like it matters to me either way.❞

the artificial being sighs, removing himself from the seated position and shutting the sketchbook. silently albedo shades his head in admitted defeat. "no - i have already captured the bio-organisms of this area. you know very well what i was illustrating."

to say that he had great patience was a great understatement. between looking after alice's daughter, or finding ways to better understand who he really is, albedo hardly ever leaves his state of tranquility. arms cross whilst looking at the other, assessing body language before approaching. "you needn't worry, i promise i won't make any errors in your portrait." his mind remained a vast empty wasteland despite being mondstadt's most astute scholar; he had very much to learn about the realm including himself.

[decoysouled]

IT SEEMS THEY WILL NEVER BE RID OF THAT RIDICULOUS NICKNAME — even if it has started to grow on them in recent days, Arakan would much prefer to have no name at all than to be known as Hat Guy by the world around them. It doesn't matter, really, that it is a nickname bestowed upon them by one of the few people who has ever really cared for them.

They will never give Nahida the satisfaction of enjoying it.

❝You say that like it should have been difficult.❞ Arakan drawls, feigned sourness covering up any tone of pride that may have been mistaken as being in those words. ❝Well done for accomplishing something so simple.❞ & even if they may sound sarcastic, Arakan is never one to give false praise regardless of what they disguise it as.

❝You'll pass the next one too.❞ It is spoken a little quieter, if only because they wouldn't want someone to hear their encouragement for Durin and get the idea that they actually care about anyone in this world. ❝& since when is she Auntie Nahida? Don't tell me she asked you to call her that.❞ That's new.

[ 🐉 ]  ──  * @decoysouled

" hat guy ! " durin chirped as he hurried over to arakan , waving a paper around excitedly . " auntie nahida said i passed ! " the dragon beamed .

he seemed to be enjoying his new human form , as not everyone took too kindly to a dragon fluttering around sumeru .

[decoysouled]

ROWERS & SWIMMERS WERE MUCH THE SAME — both were stuck in the water all the same, at the mercy of currents they could not control & could only hope wouldn't drown them instead of being a guiding force. To row down a river, to have an eventual destination to reach, was something that was reserved for mortals, much in the same way that fallen soldiers followed the dendrobiums to the next life. The difference, they suppose, between their beliefs isn't uninteresting.

( they wonder if those who doubt wisdom are shackled to the earth as a flower much in the same way as those who do not understand the eternity offered to them. )

❝What makes you believe that there's a boat for everyone?❞ Arakan questions & it is not out of annoyance ( no matter how their voice is laced with it ) but a curiosity they would never confess to. ❝Some spirits are destined to remain within the world itself, cared for by the living they protect & connected to the places they once wandered during their lives.❞

( or wandering alone, for not all had people or places to return to in their death. )

❝That aside, I wouldn't exactly call it restful to row a boat down a river, even if there isn't any struggle.❞ Truth be told, it sounds like quite the amount of work to row with the current, regardless of what was promised at the end — it all ties back, they suppose, to the other's idea that Arakan possesses a soul at all ( for does that not require a heart to be held? ) & the mortality that comes alongside that.

❝In the end, everyone returns to the places they call home, whether our ideas of it are the same. If that's at the end of a river to you, who am I to judge?❞ It certainly wouldn't be the only difference in their beliefs, considering the differences between them as people.

"... Rowers. Not swimmers. The dead men row the river on the golden boats loaded with their achievements and virtues." Cyno leaned forward, speaking with the calm and methodical tone of a teacher imparting his lesson. "And there is no struggle, for the boats follow the current. That is why we all get there, in the end. It isn't a force that should be fought."

Such was the fate of all that was mortal; that which was not mortal was cursed, or the divine. Cyno couldn't fathom anyone who'd wish to become the first, nor anyone who could become the latter. Gods seemed to simply be, above the laws of time and the earth. Surely Arakan did not believe to fall in this category? That would be incredible hubris.

But Cyno considered he could indulge their fantasies, if only for the sake of this conversation and getting to some form of mutual understanding.

"... If anyone outside of this boundary existed, one that is neither God nor mortal... maybe I would be afraid for their soul. An eternity without rest sounds like a cruel fate to have."

[decoysouled]

THERE IS A TEMPTATION TO LAUGH AT THOSE WORDS, to tell him that he is wrong & to show him all of the ways in which he is — Arakan has already told him of their past life, once, & they are sure he must know of the atrocities they once committed under the guise of vengeance. After all they have done & their poor attitude, how could Cyno think they were capable of being an angel on his shoulder?

It's absurd, really, for anyone to think that Arakan is anything less than cruel. But Cyno knows them. He knows them inside & out, better than anyone else in the world, & they have never let anyone else as close to them as he has become. No one else has ever been quite so sincere, so earnest, in every word they say & so they bite back their laughter, because it isn't funny that he thinks they are capable of goodness.

No, it isn't funny at all. It's sad that they have somehow tricked him into believing that. Even if he brings out the best in them, there is nothing about them that's good.

❝I'm glad.❞ They speak, hesitant to broach the subject of their thoughts in this moment. It is something best handled delicately & Arakan has never had a gentle enough touch to do that. ❝The last thing I'd want is for you to be lonely.❞ Because loneliness creates the most bitter of people, human or otherwise, & they know that intimately. It is not a fate they would wish on anyone else.

❝I think you've got the wrong person if you think I'd ever be an angel on your shoulder, Cyno.❞ There is no point in beating around the bush, no matter how they wish they could phrase it in a way that was a little bit kinder. They wish, for a moment, that they were capable of being kinder. ❝Don't tell me I've managed to fool you into thinking that with any sort of sincerity.❞

Hear, hear. Arakan could truly be sweet sometimes. And while in most of the now not-so-rare occasions this occurred it seemed to be mostly out of accidental slips of the tongue, Cyno could swear this once that the intention was there. Were they trying to make him blush, maybe?

If they insisted to look at him like that with those bright blue sapphires in their eyes, they might just achieve that goal.

But that was all right. The General Mahamatra had long since accepted the pleasant agony of showing vulnerability before the one he loved so.

"I stopped being lonely a long time ago." He reassured them, gently nudging at their head with his own for a moment of affectionate contact. "Though I wonder how you'd manage to handle that role when you're already busy being the angel on my other shoulder."

@artificeheart

[decoysouled]

AGREEING TO DISAGREE WAS AKIN TO ADMITTING DEFEAT — it was a fool's errand & it wasn't happening, not in this lifetime or any other. Although, there is no rule stating they must verbalise such a thing. Instead, Arakan scoffs, shaking their head in disappointment ( the type that will never go away so long as Cyno lives, of that they are sure. ) as they release their grasp on him, looking away with a slight frown playing on their lips.

Sometimes, they find it ironic; how of all the people in the world, they fell for someone with a sense of humour they could hardly stand. Others, they decide not to think about it more than they have to. Cyno isn't without his redeeming features & to an extent, his fascination with awful jokes is endearing — when he isn't torturing them with horrific wordplay & nonsensical puns, that is.

( perhaps it is simply how he shows them love. considering it like that makes it mildly less irritating. )

❝You frustrate me sometimes.❞ They state in lieu of their gripes with his awful ( rather pitiful compared to usual, too ) joke about their nickname — it is their own fault that he has that as a weapon, considering they prefer to introduce themself by title rather than name to most. A habit they have not grown out of, a safety net that allows them to hide from those they wish would not seek them out. It works for the most part, but from time to time, they end up stuck with people like Cyno.

No other do they hold so close to their soul, however.

❝I was looking into something for Lord Kusanali. Don't read too much into my absence or you'll give yourself more grey hairs.❞ This is their own humour, a teasing concern that he has been stressing himself out over their absence hidden beneath layers of sarcasm. ❝I'll make sure to tell you in person. Leaving a note leaves liability in case someone finds out I'm gone, but... I should have let you know.❞

There is a hesitation before they speak again, voice almost inaudible, as if they can't stand to say the words they owe to him — this has never exactly been their strength, but they're sure Cyno is more than aware of it. ❝I'm sorry. I've missed you too.❞ They turn back to him, leaning in to press a chaste kiss to his cheek before pulling back; they might have given him an actual kiss if he hadn't already managed to annoy them.

Maybe next time, Cyno would think twice about subjecting them to such a joke. It is wishful thinking on Arakan's part, of that they are aware, but a little hope isn't such a bad thing. Or so Nahida would say, anyway.

"We should agree to disagree on that. I enjoyed it very much." Though, in that moment it was difficult for Cyno to discern just where his appreciation for the joke ended and the gratitude and happiness to see them back safe and sound started.

He'd rather not admit to it: the last thing he wanted was to encourage them to just up and disappear with short or no notice more often. But maybe it was late to even hide it, when he was holding onto them so closely. If Arakan paid attention enough, they could probably feel the drum of his pulse against the skin.

That thought made the matra self-aware enough to at least loosen up enough to pull his head back and look them in the eyes. They looked well, at least. It put some of his worries to rest.

"I did miss you, immensely." He decided to be honest, against his own reservations. Even in the face of dread, he should not let it cloud his judgment and hold back his own honesty. Late or not, Arakan had come back to him after all, and they should be rewarded for it. "A note in the future would be nice... though I suppose I should get used to seeing you just... go wandering off, sometimes."

One for one, they were even now.

[decoysouled]

HE HAS A POINT, as much as they loathe to admit it — his jokes & attempts to make them laugh are a part of Cyno & one that they do love, even if they wouldn't say his style of humour is particularly entertaining. Without those parts of him, the other would not be the person that Arakan had fallen for, as much as they brush his jokes off as irritating at the best of times.

❝I'd prefer you as you are, I suppose...❞ Their confession of their thoughts is begrudging, that much is obvious in the way they attempt to feign disinterest in what his reaction may be yet refuse to let their eyes drift away from him for even a moment once the words have left their mouth. ❝If it's your new ambition, then be my guest.❞ It isn't as if they have any way of getting him to stop, after all.

❝Although, you already make me happy, whether I'm smiling or not. Don't forget that.❞

"But then, I wouldn't be myself anymore... would I? Are you sure you'd prefer me to be someone entirely different?" Cyno asks back with a challenging tip of his head. Arakan could speak as quiet as they wanted; their voice always found its way to the General's ears one way or another.

"Besides, I'm a man who always needs new heights to conquer. I might have won over your heart. Next, I want to see your smile."

[decoysouled]

IT IS TIMES LIKE THIS, Arakan thinks, that are the reason why they so rarely open their mouth — while actions are worth a thousand words regardless of the day, they have no desire to be a victim of Cyno's lacking sense of humour for longer than necessary, the amount they adore him be damned. For a moment, they wonder if they have become just like any lovestruck human.

They discard that thought mere seconds later.

❝You know very well that you don't have to try hard to win me over.❞ They murmur, if only because honesty is something he has earned by now & there is no point in poking thorns into hands that are so gentle with them. ❝In fact, I'd rather you stopped trying. You might have even more success that way.❞

ALL THE JOKE DOES, in the end, is elicit an annoyed groan from Arakan — there truly was no end to Cyno's abysmal humour, equal measures irritating & endearing at the same time. They wonder, really, when he would graduate to being actually funny, if he ever would.

❝First of all, we both know if I asked you for help with something illegal, you'd lecture me to no end & then some.❞ Arakan speaks, unimpressed tone seeping into every word. ❝Second of all, this? This is exactly why I'm never marrying you. You're just not funny enough.❞

[decoysouled]

THEY ARE NO VESSEL — while that had been their dear mother's intention, they had been a failure, something closer to an inhuman abomination than a mortal or a suitable vessel for her power. They have not dared to think for even a moment since then that they were capable of having a soul, regardless of Ei's intent in the creation of the inhuman abomination they were.

( a monster that could never change. a sinner that could not be redeemed. )

The river of life, as he so eloquently seems to put it, matters not to those who will live an unknown stretch of time as vast as the faux skies of Teyvat. They wonder, briefly, if he is aware of this fact & simply does not care, but those words seem far too genuine to be anything other than a true devotion to his beliefs. It would be interesting, Arakan is sure, if they actually cared for the attitude mortals held toward death.

Unfortunately, it seems they will be forced to listen regardless of whether they want to. Perhaps this is their true punishment from Nahida: to mingle with those they once despised.

❝What makes you think I'm afraid?❞ They counter, exaggerating the way they cross their arms as a mark of annoyance, if only to ensure he gets the message that he is bothering them — that may be the point, regardless of whether he thinks he has good intentions or not, but they have no interest in entertaining the idleness of humans.

They don't have the time nor patience for such a thing.

❝Just because someone sets themself aside from others doesn't mean they fear the death. I'd welcome it with open arms, personally, if it came to me.❞ It almost had, once, back when they had been a different, crueller person. Before Nahida had taken them under her wing as she did all those within Sumeru, endlessly more benevolent than the god they would have become. It almost makes their failure hurt less.

❝Maybe I should be asking you questions. What makes you so afraid of those who don't fit into that neat little box of mortality? Not everyone is in your little river, some walk beside it & watch the swimmers struggle.❞

This boy... what was he trying to say, referring to himself as not one among mortals?

He'd mentioned a mother just earlier, and Lesser Lord Kusanali seemed to hold him close. Could it be...? No. There was no way a new Archon could rise in Sumeru in such secrecy. Surely, his God would have informed her worshipers of such a development. At least the ones who had been close to her side in the past tumultuous events.

He'd be told. He shouldn't make haste with judgment.

Something about this being was off, in a way that made him bristle.

But he was still the General Mahamatra, and this individual his ward. Until his doubt was reasonable, he should maintain a neutral front.

"What makes humans mortal is the body; but that is merely a vessel upon which the soul is carried down the river of life. A husk that we are all bound to leave behind eventually, at the end of our journey." Calmly, he recited the teachings he too had received before. Preaching was not necessarily something Cyno enjoyed, yet it seemed to come out naturally on occasion. Clearly, his master had rubbed off on him.

And in the same vein the Professor had once challenged him, he questioned Arakan then. "You too are in this river. I can see you standing right in front of me, and that is proof enough. But you seem to believe it is best that you swim against the current. What is it that makes you so afraid?"