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chefbstrikesagain · 7 years ago

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MY PARENTS IN MALAYSIA

I feel like a shell of the human I used to be after a marathon of a week with my parents. Desperate for some sort of routine and 2 years of sleep I'm slowly adjusting back to life without them. What I didn't realize was how exhausting entertaining for a week would be. Explaining and translating a new language, ordering food, figuring out suitable accommodations, talking about my future, and so so so much driving are just the beginning of the trip. However, that being said, it was such a fun time showing them around my home for the last 8 months in the country that i've grown to know and love despite its abundance of geckos and lack of western toilets. I'll give you an idea of what our days looked like but remember, this are only a small glimpse into what actually happened. Documenting cultural exchange, moments of appreciation for life back home, or a new developed sense of understanding are all things hard to explain in words so you'll have to ask my parents about it!

DAY 1: The date was August 31 and it was brutally sunny and humid, yet again, in good ole' Malaysia. I made my way to the airport feeling oddly nervous to see my parents after the last 8 months of being apart. Fortunately, the airport in the city is fairly small (with only 2 terminals) which makes it really easy to park and pick people up at their gates like you see in movies! I had a 50/50 shot of getting the right gate and was unfortunately waiting at the wrong one. After just 10 short minutes I bee bopped to the other gate and there they were! Luggage in tow and surprisingly looking great. I imagined them in a rough state after their 18 hours of travel but I think the adrenaline took over and they seemed ready to explore a new country on the other side of the world. We loaded up the bags in the car and my dad went to get in (but opened the wrong door) I think they forgot about driving on the opposite side of the road here- and they marvelled at the Nissan Almera. Just kidding, but they were surprised how much room the car had for having a sewing machine for an engine. We made our way out of the parking lot to the hotel which was just a short 15 min drive.

We listened to Malaysian radio on the way back from the airport and took the scenic route along the waterfront. Malaysian and Sabah flags flew proudly everywhere as the day they flew in was 'Merdeka Day' aka Freedom day which lasts for one month in Malaysia. I told them to keep their expectations low for this vacation, as on their last vacation, they were in 3 giant cities in Spain. This was definitely going to be a more rugged, change of pace than walking around Park Guell in Spain with a glass of wine. We changed in the hotel room into our bathing suits and made our way down to the pool. Mom and Dad were surprised at how nice the Hotel was... We stayed at the Hyatt in Kota Kinabalu and it was one of the only 5 star hotels in the area. At the pool we played catch up and Dan Moore started yelling about drinks. About an hour in, my parents realized how strong the equatorial sun really is as they were both burned. It's not like going to the beach in New England where you can stay all day no problem. We left the pool, showered, and got ready to grab an early dinner. We went to El Centro, one of my favorite places, for pizza and margaritas. Afterwards, we headed to a rooftop to watch the sunset sink down into the South China Sea. Dmoore was falling asleep in his chair watching the sunset and he ended up sleeping at 7:30pm.

Day 2: We woke up really early on day 2, mostly due to the fact that dmoore was up and impatiently bopping around the room. I wanted to take them to my favourite curry restaurant for traditional food- but realized everything in town was closed! It was second raya or Eid which meant that it was a public holiday and everyone was at home celebrating with family. We walked to the waterfront where dmoore leaped across a storm drain gap (approx. 3 feet) where his legs gave out from underneath him. He coined the nickname DJ reckless for the rest of the trip and certainly lived up to the name with the hospital trip...something I'll get to later. We walked back to the hotel for breakfast where we had an incredible buffet full of noodles and even some western food. Mom and dad both tried mee hoon soup with vegetables and dad also had nasi lemak- the national dish of Malaysia. We changed into our bathing suits and booked island tours off the coast of Kota Kinabalu. It was another great day for island hopping and we spent about 4 hours total on 2 separate islands. We stood in the water, which was pretty much empty, as all the Korean and Chinese tourists were staying to stay out of the sun to stay pale and beautiful. After a few hours of lounging we grabbed lunch and took the boat back to our hotel. We changed quickly and I took mom and Dad to the City Mosque.

The mosque is a giant floating structure that overlooks the ocean. It's coloured with cobalt blue tiles and is entirely white- definitely a sight for sore eyes. In order for my mom to enter, she had to cover completely, which meant renting a tundong (Malay word for Hijab). Check out the pictures- she certainly rocked the outfit! We didn't spend too much time at the mosque as prayer was happening soon so we left and headed towards the mall. We grabbed sushi for dinner which was incredible. I force-fed mom and made her try the smallest bite of sushi which she openly protested but in the end I think she liked it.... My dad was shocked at the cost of the whole dinner which came out to be 12USD or 4USD per person. In the US, that much sushi would have easily been $60. This was a theme for the rest of the trip. Every meal was converted and my parents faces would light up when they realized they spent 4USD to feed the three of us as well as 1 of my friends.

Later that night, my mom and I explored the hotel and found the hidden gym and then grabbed drinks while DJ reckless had a business call to make at 8:30. Joey joined us for drinks around 10:30 and we stayed up until midnight which was late for them.

Day 3: We checked out of the hotel around 9:30am and made the 3 hour drive up to The Tip of Borneo where we would stay for 2 nights. We listened to a bunch of podcasts and made easy conversation about things we passed along the way including cows, stray dogs, and why the gas stations were always so full. When we finally reached our destination, called 9 Huts on a Hill, we pulled in and were surrounded by geese, chickens, and bamboo huts. The cutest little woman greeted us at check-in and had us sit down while she offered us some water. Mom broke out into a laughing attack from trying to take in everything (chickens and bamboo huts) and had to put her sunglasses on to conceal her tears. It looked like she was having a nervous breakdown. I understand because it was definitely a downgrade from the 5 star hotel but the accommodations turned out way better than the first impression.

The huts were pretty much open air concept as the front wall could be broken down. There was a queen sized bed with a mosquito net over the top and an A/C unit and fan to keep you cool at night. Each hut had its own bathroom and shower which was a huge plus (not a squatty potty) so Cathy was happy. After settling in we ate dinner and explored the complex. We were on a big hill right above the ocean, complete with a giant yoga platform, a kitchen, and a 'chill zone' that had a bunch of hammocks to hangout in. We dragged a fan out from a room and drank beers and finished a bottle of wine while watching the sunset. Pretty great first night. We turned in around 10pm for some much needed rest in our comfortable beds.

Day 4: We woke early (around 7:30) no surprise there...and headed into town for our first Malay breakfast!!! I ordered mom and dad roti tulur (egg bread with curry) and tea tarik which is tea mixed with condensed milk. They loved it so much they each ordered 2 glasses of tea. They were also pleasantly surprised with the roti they had for breakfast. We paid (3 USD) for breakfast and made our way to my friend Robbie's beach at the secret place. We spent the whole day drinking at Robbies in the water and marvelling at the beauty and just how untouched the land was. I'll let them describe to you how amazing this place was because I talk about it all the time- but ask them!

We grabbed dinner again at the curry house after we showered and said goodbye to Robbie and his family. We finished the second bottle of wine that night under the yoga platform where it monsooned shortly after sunset for the rest of the night. Definitely a recipe for a great nights sleep which we needed to prepare for the marathon days we were going to have in Ranau and the rest of the trip.

Day 5: We checked out of 9 huts and made the dangerous drive from the Tip of Borneo to my small town in Ranau. It's dangerous because we were driving up and down mountains, some roads were non-existent, and landslides were everywhere. The signs said the hills were on average 16% grade either going up or down - if that means anything to you. Despite the dangerous drive it made for incredible views. You could see so far and just how mountainous the area I live in really is. We arrived to my house around 2pm where 40 of my students greeted my Mom and Dad! They were so excited to meet them and of course, take selfies. After about 5 hours of small talk and pictures, we left the open house with two of my students and grabbed some food in town at restaurant Muslim. We talked about ghost stories, possessions, and how the street I live on is haunted- just normal dinner conversation. We dropped off the students around 9:30pm and headed back to my street where we parted ways for 9 hours until the next morning when we had school.

Day 6: If you've made it this far into the blog post, congratulations! I'm exhausted and distracted just from writing this so if you're still reading one thing is sure- you definitely don't have ADD! Wahooo. Anyways, Tuesday morning, day 6, was probably the craziest day my parents had while in Malaysia and they were such troopers the entire time. We woke up around 7am to get to school by 8 which was my first class. My class is with form 1 and 2 girls (ages 12/13) and who all live at the school. They don't have good English at all so we usually do some sort of art as a medium to communicate with one another. My parents brought sidewalk chalk to school and we drew the city of Boston's skyline. This was a great medium and the art turned out beautiful. My mom even had some of the girls lay down on the ground holding hands and she traced them all. She told them that when I was little she would trace me and I would colour in my body with clothes and hair and a face. Dmoore wasn’t as approachable and some of the girls told me in Malay that he’s so serious. It’s tough to communicate with young children when you don’t know the language. Their shyness can be misinterpreted as disinterest, which is usually the farthest thing from what they actually want. After saying goodbye, we had class with 4 Bersih- which is one of my favourite classes. These students are older and already have a good foundation in English which means I can teach more intricate lessons that go deeper than colors or numbers. I split the class up into 4 groups and gave them all category titles. Seasons, Food, Sports, and Slang all having to do with Boston. The students then had to interview my parents to get the necessary information and do a short, creative presentation on what they learned. They all did a great job and some of the presentations were hilarious - especially the Boston Slang.

After school, we left and grabbed lunch before our paragliding session! I convinced them both to jump off a mountain which I never thought would happen....After paragliding we went to a fish farm where you stick your feet in a river and a bunch of fish swim over and supposedly suck the dead skin off of your feet. Mom was freaking out the whole time and barely put one toe in the water. Afterwards, we grabbed dinner at the Sabah Tea plantation where we overlooked vast green tea fields and Asian mountains. Mom and Dad ordered more Tea Tarik and achieved a new level of sugar high before we had to leave for our next event. After a dinner of butter chicken and vegetables we made our way back to our house to shower and get ready for drinks out on the town. We had about an hour to relax before I picked them up and made our way to the 'Kolam'. In the middle of the jungle there is a fish pond place where you can order lots of food and drinks. My parents were shocked that there was any sort of habitable life that far in the jungle and not one mosquito. They were able to try Lihing, which is the local traditional rice wine, and they seemed to really like it. Doreen got them a cake that said ‘Welcome to Ranau Mr. and Mrs. Moore’ which was really nice of her. After eating some quick we decided that we should leave as the drinking was really starting to go downhill.

Day 7: After waking up tired and hungover we made our way to school for the last day. My first class on Wednesday’s is arguably the best class of the week with the special needs students. They always get so excited to see me and just all around have great energy. My parents had a warm welcome by the Teachers and worked with a small group of students on practicing the letters ‘I’ and the letter ‘S’. While working with the students the teachers were setting up for a small breakfast in the kitchen. They had coffee and small finger food, known as quey, for my parents to try. It was so nice of them to organize this- I had no idea they were going to do that! After making small talk about our trip and what life was like in America we said our thank yous and goodbyes. We left class and then headed to my next class with form 4 amanah which we were a little late for. The students are all crazy, in the best way possible, and I talked with them before about teaching my parents a traditional dance that we do in Sabah called the Sumazau. The students moved the desks and led my parents to the center of the dance floor where they instructed them how to dance while I blasted the music. I got some great videos on my go-pro and will be sure to post some pictures. We left that class after giving out some chocolate coins, and headed to a form 6 class who are all pre-university and about 18 years old. This class was harder to plan for as they are less willing to be really outgoing, so we did a lesson on Malaysia where they taught my parents about the major Holidays observed. This class sort of dragged on and I could tell my parents were getting tired so we ended class early and with a giant selfie.

After school, we grabbed a quick lunch of martabak sayur and headed to the famous Poring Hot Springs. We enjoyed a butterfly garden, tree-top canopy walkways, and a short hike to a 50 foot waterfall! Poring was great but it was such a hot and humid day we were just ready to relax. We headed home and I got to nap for 2 hours before Doreen asked us to dinner. When we showed up to dinner I just expected Doreen and maybe her husband to be there. I was not prepared for 10 teachers including the principal to show up. There was a big buffet and mom couldn’t stop talking about the pumpkin soup. All in all, Doreen really pulled out all of the stops while they were here- I really appreciate everything she did. Shortly after dinner, when all of the muslims left, we drove to a bar down the street with Ravi, Rose, Zeddy, and the three of us started drinking Tiger. Ravi kept ordering set after set and him and my dad were really getting along. Two kindred spirits for sure. After making a deal with Ravi that we could leave when all the beers were done, and no more sets to be ordered, we escaped and said our goodbyes to everyone as that was the last time my parents would see them. We laughed on the drive home about how funny the night was and were all looking forward to sleeping in the next morning.

Day 8: Dan Moore woke up super early, no surprise there, and was itching for me to connect my phone to his so he could browse the internet. With tired eyes and an attitude, I quickly connected our phones and closed my eyes for another much needed hour of sleep. We woke up and headed to the sports complex where we got ready to rent ATV’s. The paths the guide was taking us on were super overgrown, bumpy, and on the side of a mountain. All of these factors made it really hard to control the ATV. Dmoore was driving like an absolute savage and the guide and I kept exchanging worried looks when he would slam the gas instead of the break and narrowly avoided hitting one of us. Inevitably, something went wrong and we found ourselves in the emergency room for DJ reckless. In hindsight, it’s all really funny now but at the time I was nervous how this was going to impact our plans - especially if his ankle was broken! The hospital did an x-ray and said they didn’t think it was broken… but they would need an MRI to be sure about any other injuries. We asked for crutches and they told us that they were ‘finished’ no more crutches left.

We left Ranau with DJ reckless in the backseat and headed towards Kota Belud for a Proboscis river monkey tour and to grab lunch with my friends Janna and Kelsey. We found crutches at a Pharmacy in their town which really saved the day and made dmoore much more mobile and less hoppy. We ate lunch on a lake about a 10 minute drive from the ocean where we talked about the future, my parents trip, and the elephant in the room - dmoore’s swollen ankle. After lunch we went to my friend Jessi’s house where she lives with a Malay family and had tea and quey while we waited to go on the river monkey tour. We boarded a small boat and set off down a muddy river surrounded by jungle on all sides. We saw a giant monitor lizard, mud crabs, and the monkeys! It was hard to see the monkeys because they were so far but it was great to see them in the wild and in their natural habitat vs. a Zoo. The tour was really cool but I was really looking forward to firefly tour which we had to cancel because it was getting late and would be hard to fit dinner in with Claire later on. After saying goodbye to Jessi we grabbed a quick dinner with Claire before continuing the trek on into the city. We arrived at our hotel and we got ice for DJ recklesses ankle and gave into our craving for Western food and ordered pizza hut. Mom and Dad were so happy to be back in a clean, air-conditioned hotel room, while I was trying to live up the last few days before going back to reality (dirty water and fried rice). Mom and I went souvenir shopping and then we all turned in early that night.

Day 9: The last dayyyyy. We were able to sleep in until 9! We gathered our tired and sore bodies and headed to the hotel breakfast. The buffet overlooked the ocean and you could see all the small ferry boats shuttling people from island island to island like scurrying ants. We took extra coffee and tea from the buffet and brought it to the rooftop where we sat in the shade and tried to digest everything we’ve done over the last week. This inevitably led to DJ reckless ordering a healthy drink (coconut and cucumber juice) with a twist - just add vodka. We spent pretty much the whole day at the rooftop pool in and out of the water and shade ordering food and drinks. Dan and Cathy needed to get as much sun as possible as this is ‘it’ until next summer. Live music began around 7pm and was this awesome band doing covers of really mellow music- Maroon 5, The Carpenters, etc to give you the vibe. With an ocean breeze ruffling our hair, drinks in hand, and soft music in the background I knew we did good and was so happy everyone made it through the week alive. We definitely had some close calls with DJ reckless but nonetheless, a great time. Mom had been craving frozen yogurt all day and used our drunkenness to get us down to the first floor of the hotel where the mall connected to the hotel. Dmoore and I ordered tea in the piano lounge where a performer was just wrapping up playing. I waited until he was well out of earshot and began to play- it had been over a year! We ended with a really choppy version of Billy Joel’s piano man while dmoore was on vocals singing into his frozen yogurt like a microphone.

Overall, the week long trip felt like an eternity but also I blinked and then it was over. I feel so grateful that Mom and Dad flew all the way across the world to see me. It really validates my whole experience here and I know when I go home I can talk about it and someone will understand what I mean, or be able to relate past ‘oh that sounds cool’. I have really made a home for myself here and integrated myself into the community and it will not be easy to leave- especially with my students. I am also so happy they were able to come with open minds and hearts and experience a Muslim country in a time where it is unsafe to practice Islam in America. I hope they can help be a voice for the misunderstood and an ally against discrimination where it has become so normalised in the media to highlight a minority for their issues. Malaysia has become apart of me over this past year and I’m so happy the people that are closest to me are able to understand how this country and culture has shaped me.

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