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sophiexteresa · 4 years ago

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Thomas Sanders Instagram Q&A Transcript

From @thatsthat24’s Instagram story, 25/8/2020. Questions in bold. Text added to the story in (parenthesis/brackets), and descriptive info in *italics*. I tried uploading the video(s) too, but Tumblr is having issues, so here’s the transcript only!

Thomas: I had some time this evening so I figured, hey, why not? Another lil’ Q an’ A, so if you want to ask a question *posh French voice* be my guest!

When approximately will the next sanders sides be out? Very good question! Uh, we are aiming this for a late September release, that’s what we’re all working towards.

Favourite musical you have been in or just favourite musical in general? This is really tough, I can’t decide. I’m between Rent where I was in the ensemble, Peter Pan where I played Slightly Soiled, which was just one of the lost boyos — boyos? Boys — and, uh, Into The Woods where I played Cinderella’s prince and that’s where Roman’s first costume came from.

Are you ever gonna due your hair purple again? I loved it! Yes! I miss the purple hair too.

Do you love me? *laughing* Yes of course! I do love me.

What would each of the sides’ reaction be to seeing the Grand Canyon? *speaking very quickly* Roman would be revelling that we made the journey, Patton would be marvelling at the memories being made, Logan would be telling you to look at these fascinating signs for important information, Virgil would be telling you to ‘get back from those cliffs!’, Janus would be telling you to take pictures to make it look like you’re next to the cliff, ‘for clout’, and Remus would be like *Remus voice* ‘you could push somebody and get away with it’.

Also when will we get more Picani, I miss him? You and me both, Bri, and honestly with the amount of amazing cartoons that have come out recently *sighs while smiling* yeah, I am a-hankering (?) to get back to Emile!

How have you been doing, like really? Mental health is important as you teach us: I feel like everybody’s kinda struggling with mental health right now, especially people in the USA with COVID. Uhm *clears throat* for me I continuously struggle with the balance between work and leisure time, um, social media makes that difficult, blurs the lines, and I’m working on it.

Do you have any tattoos? Umm, I don’t, uh, I struggle with the permanence of tattoos. And like do I, can I, make a decision that I like? But! There are tattoos that I might like. Where I’d put them, I have no idea, umm, but I think like, maybe like, little stars!

What rank of “Gay” are you? Big gay? What rank? *speechless pause* uh... General. You know? I wanna do my duty. Come back a hero. An all-American Queero *gets an idea* *roughly quoting Hamilton* Queer comes the General!

Can you please make Logan day something Patton would say? *Logan’s voice* Something Patton would say? Umm... please, I request more baked goods from the kitchen so that I can fill Thomas’s body with more trans-fats at 3 am. I don’t know, I don’t like this game.

Have you ever dated a girl? *awkward silence* I have. It was pretty uneventful.

Do you miss your friends? *laughs* Oh... *face crumples as if he’s about to cry*

What are you voice acting in or are you now allowed to say? Not until tomorrow.

When did you know you were gay? I think I answered this one on the last Q&A, but it was early. I was like, 9 or 10 at least.

When will we see Gavin? Gavin has started school! He’s back in his hometown, so I don’t know when I’m gonna see him. He’s still getting taller — I can actually include a picture of him that his mom sent me after he got a new little hairdo *insert photo of an awesome Gavin here*

Do you miss vine? For like, sentimental reasons, yes. Uh, I mean, technically it had its issues and I don’t miss being restricted to 6 seconds anymore *laughs*

What has been your favourite part of the day? My favourite part of today was actually... I came up with this last minute short video, and I got it done and I sent it to some friends and they really liked it. I have to save it until Thursday thought, but it’s just nice to come up with stuff that makes your friends laugh.

Janus acting like Remus? *Remus’ voice* Remus here! Looks like the Dukey just dropped in! *Remus’ laugh* *Takes a breath and snaps into Janus’ character* I spend a lot of time with him so I’ve had a lot of practise.

Why do I feel like we’re gonna have another angsty Virgil moment? When is Virgil not being angsty...?

Please can you say trans rights? Uh, heck yah trans rights! I, uh, this one was very simple but I wanted to say it!

Do you think Virgil would be into anime? Actually, if you remember from, uh, Accepting Anxiety, uh, part 2, there’s actually a Death Note poster in his room, so he definitely likes some anime.

Hi! Can you say hola to the Hispanic fanders in el vecindario fander? Please? We love you! Oh my gosh, *a very naturally american pronunciation* hola! that’s very kind of you guys. I appreciate all of the support you guys give, and I love all of you guys.

STORYTIME! I love you: *upbeat voice* Storytime! I love you back.

How gay are you? Like, 15 gay! I rank General!

How did you end up meeting and babysitting Gavin? Gavin is actually Leo’s nephew, so he would come up here, uh, during the holidays or during the summer, and alternate being baby-sat between me and Leo’s mom - his grandma.

What was the inspo for Janus’ outfit? Ooh, that’s a really good question, uh... Joan had a vision in their mind for almost kind of like this early 20th century or late 19th century kinda Jack the Ripper vibe.

Any advice for gaybies to fit in with society? Don’t apologise for being yourself. If people have an issue, that’s their issue that they have to work through. Do not apologise for being yourself.

What type of gay are you? (Math gay, plant gay, caffine gay, etc): Wait, there’s such thing as a math gay? I am absolutely that, and I feel like I’m just gonna be naming traits about myself but I’m a trivia gay, a driving gay, apparently a math gay, a Disney gay *laughs* and a theatre gay.

Not a question but I’m glad to be alive at the same time as someone as great as you: Dude, this stuff is really sweet. *laughs* That’s really sweet, umm, trust me, I feel the same way about all of you. Honestly.

Why don’t you own a doggo yet? I... went to Petsmart today - I didn’t get an animal, but like... I’m thinking about it and this question is like... hmmm...

I’ve run out of cartoons to watch, any recommendations? Owl house! Owl house, owl house. I just tried it, and I immediately got hooked. Infinity train’s also a really good one, duck tales is amazing, and I’m getting ready to start Tangled: the animated series, so *shrugs*.

What is Patton’s opinion on rats? *adorable Patton voice, slowly zooming in on his face* They are tiny little squishy precious babies!!!

How do I ask people for their pronouns? I don’t know, I mean, I don’t think it’s like a big deal? I hope we could get to the point where we could just be like ‘what are your pronouns?’ and then they would tell you, and then you’d just, you know, carry on the rest of your conversation.

A circle has no bounds and it’s the same with your beauty: This is really precious, and it of course came from Nash (?) who is a poet, he published a lot of wonderful, wonderful poems on twitter, they are are amazing, and you are once again far too sweet, Nash.

Dream role? This is a pretty broad question, so maybe dream theatrical role would be Sweeny Todd, dream movie role would be anything in the marvel universe, uh, really just give me anything in any voice acting role, *smiling mischievously* egg rolls are also really good.

Can Remus please say ‘I am the sand guardian, guardian of the sand’? *Remus voice* I am the sand guardian, guardian of the sand! (love that vine)

Are there still plans for the Roman series? *nods* Oh, yeah, yeah, it was definitely hindered by COVID, uh, as was this Sanders Asides episode that’s coming up, which is why it’s taking longer in the editing stage, it is our, uh... strategy, for circumventing the obstacle, and we hope you like it.

Are we still getting an August playlist? Uh, heck yah you are! But honestly, actually, if you guys have any suggestions I should include in the playlist, lemme know! I’d be happy to get some suggestions - but yes. You will be definitely getting one.

May I please see your feet? *confused, slightly disgusted expression* *begins to move the camera away from his face* *holds up a tape measure, extended to 1 foot long* *grins*

Any shows on Netflix to recommend? Umbrella Academy is really good, Dragon Prince, uh, She-Ra, of course, umm The Hollow (?) is really cool, there’s a documentary about video games called High Score, that was really fun.

Roman, who would you say the gayest side is? *Roman’s voice* Oh, we’re all equally gay, okay? *chuckles* it’s a sexuality, not a personality trait. *takes a breath and speaks quickly* I’m just kidding it’s *sings* meeeeee!

If you were not a YouTuber, what would you see yourself doing and why? Uh, maybe putting my chemical engineering degree to some use. *laughs awkwardly* Uh, I went to school for 5 years for that one.

Like you literally make me so flipping happy: I’m glad! I don’t know what I’m doing to do that, but the feeling is absolutely mutual.

Can we have Virgil saying “Falsehood”? *hair already over one eye, in Virgil’s voice* Uh, c’mon, okay, sure. *very quietly and unenthusiastically* falsehood. Is that good? Is that? I don’t know, I don’t wanna steal his bit.

Which Sanders Side do you feel you embody most? Ah, I would probably say it’s either Patton or Roman because Patton can be definitely me, all the time, just really enthusiastic about things and finding things cute, but Roman... Roman’s sensitivity, oh. That’s me.

What was the first job you had? I actually worked as a page in a library! A- pages basically just kinda like, shelve books, check books out; it’s one of the chillest jobs I’ve ever had, one of my favourites, and my dad always had a lovely dad joke for it: ‘you’re working as a page, when do you get promoted to a book?’

How tall are you? I usually say 5ft 10, but I think I’m trying to be a little more realistic with myself. And I’m probably 5ft 9 and a half. *zooms in on his face, staring into the camera* I’m holding onto that half a foot for all dear life.

DROP THE SKIN ROUTINE PLEASE! This is very sweet, uh, I, *laughs nervously*, uh, I use Curology? They’re very nice. Umm, just... different kinds of lotion, I guess. (I suppose I should write down what I do lol)

Can we get a FALSEHOOD? *is standing* *clears throat* *points upwards from his eyeline* FALSEHOOD!

Do you have a boyfriend if not are you planning on dating soon? I do not, uh, dating is kinda difficult right now midst COVID, you know, kinda tough... love... in the time of Corona... umm, but, you know, option’s open.

When was your first kiss? I’m sure I’ve answered this somewhere, it was in high school, I might have been 15 or 16. It was with a girl. *Shakes head* And all I can remember is hitting teeth. A lot.

Can we get a super super vague hint about the new Asides episode? Alright, I’m getting ready to end the Q&A, so this, you know, if you’ve made it so far you deserve this super vague answer, umm... it includes a side that was not in the last episode. (This isn’t much, I apologise lol)

Thomas: And that is it for this evening! Thank you so much, you guys, for watching. I know some of you are still over in Europe watching and it’s like 4 in the morning, and I need to go to bed so thank you all so much for your questions - I gotta do this more often ‘cause I really enjoy it. Love you guys, gals, and non-binary pals. Peace out!

#edit: if you want to see the video(s) then please feel free to ask and i’ll try to send it to you! thanks so much #WOAH #This took me literaly hours to write up #probably 5 or so hours #i've been at it all day #anyhow tags!#thomas sanders #sanders sides #tss #tssides #ts roman #ts patton #ts logan #ts janus #ts remus #ts virgil #ts #if there's any corrections i need to make please tell me since i'm too tired to re-read

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fullmetalscullyy · 5 years ago

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the way it was - chapter 11

this old heart darlin’ is weak for you

summary: what if riza never went to war? riza hawkeye has just married the man she loves. six months into their marriage, an unexpected surprise stops her from following roy to the military. a canon divergence au that explores what might have happened had riza been unable to join the military. there will be plenty of family fluff, angst, and royai.

rated: m | warnings: no archive warning apply

chapter 10 | read on ao3

1911

i love you

this old heart darlin’ is weak for you

Their holiday was a welcome break from their usual busy lives and while they’d both missed Mia terribly, they had to admit that it was nice not having to look after a toddler all day.

The next week was a complete blur. Riza’s teaching classes could be done from home. She had to attend the East City University in the morning to collect her paperwork for the day, which was a welcome exercise because the walk to the university meant Riza could give Mia her mid-morning nap. Then, she had two days to complete whatever she’d been given by her professor. It was a system that worked and Riza just hoped it always would.

At this pace she’d be a qualified teacher in two years. It was an exciting concept. Riza loved Mia, but she didn’t want to be a stay at home mother her whole life. She became restless after being in their apartment for too long, longing to go out and see what the city had to offer her that day. Riza wanted to learn and explore. There was so much knowledge out there in the world and so many places to see. Riza, now with the freedom she’d craved her whole childhood, wanted to see it all. Taking Mia along for the ride made it even more enjoyable.

The weekend after their short getaway, they found themselves in East City Town Hall, at a military ball. Roy was required to go and Riza was interested to see what this kind of party was about. She expected there to be stuck up big wigs in the military parading about with their medals, and Roy told her she wouldn’t be far off. It was a lot of sucking up to the higher echelon of the military, and the thought left a sour taste in Riza’s mouth. She’d heard some stories from Roy when he’d been venting after work. The higher ups didn’t seem to be particularly pleasant company to keep.

“They’re not,” Roy told her, buttoning up his shirt in the mirror in their bedroom. “But I have to go. Having you there would make the whole experience infinitely better. Plus, everyone is dying to meet you.”

“Everyone?” Riza asked, raising an eyebrow while she secured the necklace around her neck. She didn’t normally wear jewellery however Roy had been very sweet and surprised her with the necklace as a gift this morning. He’d bought it for her to wear to the ball, and she couldn’t turn it down. It was beautiful, but simple in design. Just how she liked things. It was a spontaneous gift from Roy and that was all it took for her to love it.

“Yeah,” he chuckled. “Everyone in the team is convinced you aren’t real and that I’m making you up.”

“Why?” she asked, amused.

Roy shrugged, then grinned. “I don’t think they believe that I could’ve ever secured a woman as lovely as you.” He kissed her temple as he passed, brushing his hand along her waist gently as he entered their bathroom and closed the door.

“The feeling is mutual, by the way.”

There was a pause, then the sound of the toilet flushing. After he’d washed his hands, Roy’s head poked out the door as he dried them on a towel. “You don’t believe in how amazing you are?”

Riza shook her head with a fond smile. “No. Well, yes, but not the point I was trying to make. I don’t believe how lucky I am to have fallen in love with you,” she clarified.

“Don’t ever think you’re not the most incredible person on the planet.” He hung up the towel before approaching. He gripped her waist gently while Riza wrapped her arms loosely around his neck. “And I’m the same. I can’t believe I’m so lucky.”

Chris was in town for the weekend to visit, so she’d taken Mia off their hands to spend some time with her granddaughter. Mia adored Chris Mustang, which was strange given the latter’s personality, however she was a completely different person with Mia. She loved her granddaughter unconditionally, and it showed in everything she did for her. Riza’s stomach dropped when she saw just how many gifts Chris had bought for Mia for this visit. In her mind, she mentally searched their apartment for where they’d store them all.

A taxi took them to the Town Hall. It was a subdued ride. Roy chatted with the driver while Riza gazed into the streets of East City. It wasn’t often she got to drive anywhere in the city. Whenever her and Roy went out, they always walked. It was mesmerising to watch the lights flash by as they flew along the road.

“Hey, boss!” a portly ginger man greeted them from afar. He called across the room towards them, offering Roy a wave. A blonde head popped up above everyone else, scanning the room for Roy. Upon spotting them, his eyes widened and his head ducked. He disappeared from view.

“Come on,” Roy urged, steering Riza towards the members of his team. Nerves tickled her stomach as they approached as it always did when she was introduced to someone new. Roy had stated there were four people in his team, so meeting four new people made it slightly worse.

“Hey!” the first man greeted enthusiastically with a wide grin. He glanced over to the blonde man beside him while wearing a rather smug look on his face, then turned his attention back to them both.

“Hey, Breda,” Roy greeted before turning to face her. “This is Second Lieutenant Heymans Breda,” he introduced, gesturing towards the ginger man. Lieutenant Breda grinned and offered Riza his hand, which she took.

“Nice to meet you,” Riza smiled.

“Likewise, Mrs. Mustang,” he beamed. The title was far too formal for her liking, but from the glint in his eye, Riza guessed it was for the benefit of the blonde man who was glaring at him. She glanced between them both, resisting the urge to raise an eyebrow at their antics.

“Please, just call me Riza,” she offered. The smirk dropped from his face, and Lieutenant Breda’s smile was genuine this time.

“Of course.”

“This,” Roy announced, moving onto the next member of his team, gesturing to the blonde man who snapped out of his glare hurriedly. “Is Second Lieutenant Jean Havoc. Don’t mind the glare or sullen look,” Roy added smoothly, making direct eye contact with Lieutenant Havoc. “He’s probably lost a bet with Breda over something. Ignore him.”

“Hey,” he muttered quietly but indignantly.

“This is Warrant Officer Vato Falman.” A grey-haired man took her hand and shook it firmly. Before being introduced his face had been a picture of seriousness, but now he smiled at Riza warmly.

“A pleasure to meet you, Ma’am.”

“And this is Sergeant Kain Fuery.” The last member of the team looked young – almost too young – with black hair styled in a boyish look. His glasses rose as a smile overtook his whole face. It lit up the room with its warmth, and Riza took a liking to the young man.

“It’s so lovely to finally meet you, Ma’am,” he greeted enthusiastically. She liked Sergeant Fuery. He seemed very sweet.

“Likewise, to all of you.”

“What would you like to drink?” Roy asked her.

“A wine would be lovely, thank you.”

“I’ll get it, Ma’am,” Lieutenant Havoc interrupted. He looked slightly sheepish, and she supposed this was his way of making it up to them over whatever had stirred up the one-sided glaring match between him and Lieutenant Breda. “Don’t worry about it, Boss. I’ll be right back.”

“That was… Unexpected,” Roy stated, blinking after Lieutenant Havoc.

Lieutenant Breda snorted. “Havoc didn’t believe you’d actually married someone. He was convinced it was fake. A whole scam,” he chuckled. “It would’ve been elaborate if it had been, however, I don’t think you’re that smart to pull it off.”

“Hey,” Roy frowned indignantly.

Lieutenant Breda shrugged, but his grin remained.

“It’s a likely conclusion Breda arrived at, Sir,” stated Warrant Officer Falman. “It would require a whole lot of planning and backtracking that even a normal person would struggle and fail completely with it.”

“Thanks… I think.”

“Don’t worry about them,” Sergeant Fuery interrupted their conversation, drawing Riza’s attention away from her husband and his two colleagues. “They do this all the time. It’s all good fun.” Riza found herself smiling.

Sergeant Fuery gave off a very “little brother” vibe, and Riza felt the pull towards it. She thought he would be someone she’d get on well with. She wasn’t quite so sure about the other three yet, but wasn’t one to jump to conclusions. She’d give Lieutenants Havoc and Breda the benefit of the doubt. Warrant Officer Falman seemed perfectly cordial and friendly though, like Sergeant Fuery. He seemed very intelligent, and Riza wondered if they would have any deep and interesting conversations at any point. Roy wasn’t unintelligent by any means, but his focus was alchemy and military strategy and that was it. He had no interest in subjects that weren’t a science. Riza was fascinated by the world, and often wondered aloud why things were the way they were. If Roy had an answer, he would tell her, but the beauty of the world lost some of its wonder when a scientific theory had been applied to it. Riza was undeterred though. She still loved that about him. She’d often sit and watch the cogs work in his head as he tried to figure something out, or how he passionately described how something worked. She’d find herself falling in love with him all over again.

Lieutenant Havoc returned with their drinks and offered them to her and Roy. He gave her an apologetic smile as he approached. “Sorry for the glare earlier. I hope you didn’t think it was directed at you.”

Riza shook her head. “Not at all.”

Lieutenant Havoc let out a sigh of relief, and Riza found herself smiling behind her glass, amused. Bless him. “Okay, good. Breda can be an asshole sometimes and likes to rub it in my face when he wins.”

“What did he win?” Riza asked innocently. It was comical the way his face fell. Lieutenant Havoc glanced towards her briefly, then away, swallowing hard. His Adam’s apple bobbed in his throat nervously.

“Okay, don’t take this the wrong way,” he began, turning her away from the rest of the group. He placed a hand on her shoulder, walking a few steps away. She resisted the urge to shrug it off and went with him, too intrigued to pass the opportunity up.

“Havoc?” Roy called behind them. The hand left her shoulder, and Riza watched as he waved Roy off irritably. This was still very entertaining to Riza. It was adorable the way Lieutenant Havoc’s face had turned slightly pink in embarrassment.

“I’m sorry. I’ll start with that,” Lieutenant Havoc stated. He downed his drink – it looked like whisky – and placed the glass not so gently on the table next to them. He looked incredibly nervous, and like he didn’t want to offend her. “But Breda and I made a bet that Mustang had made you up.”

“Oh?” Riza asked, raising an eyebrow. She only just managed to hide her smile by taking another drink. Who would have the time to craft an entirely fictional wife and child, and then have the patience to maintain that for a year and a half?

“Yeah.” Lieutenant Havoc coughed to clear his throat. “I’m sorry. He never really mentioned you, but we saw a wedding photo. I thought it was some wife he’d lost years ago. From the way he’d handled it, it certainly seemed that way.”

Now that was interesting. Just how did Roy handle their wedding photo in the office?

“What do you mean?” she asked before she could think, her curiosity getting the better of her. She hadn’t meant to ask out loud, but she was interested to know the kind of person Roy was at work around these men.

Lieutenant Havoc shifted on the spot. “Oh. Well, uh, he would always be so careful with it. He would never show anyone and wouldn’t bring it up, but I caught him a few times smiling at it when he was alone.” Lieutenant Havoc paused and shot her a genuine smile. “I must say, Ma’am, from the way he smiles at that photo, he loves you a lot.”

Riza felt warmth spread across her whole entire body. A smile slowly spread across her face, and she nodded. “I feel the same way about him.”

Lieutenant Havoc grinned. “For what it’s worth, I’m glad you’re real and still among the living.”

Riza chuckled at him. “Thank you, Lieutenant Havoc.”

“Just Havoc, Ma’am,” he grinned.

“Then it’s just Riza for me too.” His grin was infectious. She liked him. He was a bit of a goofball, he didn’t seem to be the sharpest tool in the shed, but he was open and honest. Plus, if Roy had hand picked him, then he must be loyal. From the way he spoke, Riza could tell Havoc had a lot of respect for Roy. That was probably why he’d apologised to her immediately. Riza could respect that about him.

“What are you two talking about?” Roy asked with a grin, announcing his approach. Havoc stiffened slightly and Riza smirked to herself.

“Oh, nothing,” she waved off. “I was just telling Havoc about one of my lovely single friends that might be interested in him.”

Riza snorted, unable to hold in her laugh, when she saw Havoc’s spine straighten even further. His cheeks turned a light colour of pink.

“Wow, relax, Havoc. It’s a woman, not an eight-foot crocodile.”

“Excuse me,” Havoc muttered, shooting a glare at Roy, who just laughed at his misfortune.

“It was about the bet, wasn’t it?” Roy stated, slinging an arm around her shoulder. They walked towards the dance floor, Riza noticed. Excitement coursed through her veins at the thought she’d be able to dance with Roy again. It was one of her favourite past-times, being held close in his arms as they swayed together.

“It was, yes. Poor guy was genuinely apologetic. I respect that though.”

“Havoc’s the kind of guy that will bet on anything – and I mean anything – so it didn’t surprise me. I want to address that though –”

There was the quiet tinkling of someone hitting glass, followed by an announcement that dinner was about to be served.

“Ah,” Roy smiled at her. “After dinner then.”

Dinner was beautiful. The food was exquisite, and Riza was thankful that the company at the table was solely the men in Roy’s team. They bantered back and forth, which was captivating. Riza laughed so much during dinner that it took her an age to finish her meal. They were good men, and Riza was glad they all had Roy’s back. She often worried about him at work, going out on field missions and the like. It made her feel better to know these men were looking out for him.

They were incredibly loyal to him, and now, by extension, her. Havoc had announced that quite loudly – he was on the way to getting very drunk – and the rest of the team agreed, raising their glasses in a toast. Roy had just beamed at her, giving her hand a quick squeeze under the table. She supposed this was what he’d wanted all along – for them all to meet and get along so well. The fact she’d been so readily included in this little group made her happier than anyone would probably ever understand. She’d been on her own for so long as a child, then Roy came along and lit up her life. However, it had just been the two of them. Now, she had a plethora of people around her who were happy and willing to look out for her. It was a wonderful feeling.

On the dancefloor Roy twirled her around effortlessly. She felt like she was flying in his arms. She could dance, but he was much better at it than her. He’d taught her when they were growing up together, in stolen moments away from her father’s oppressive presence. It was a welcome reprieve from her monotonous evenings of cooking and cleaning up after Roy and her father.

“I love you,” Riza murmured as a smile spread across her face. Her arms were looped behind his neck, her fingertips playing with strands of his hair.

A loving smile broke out across Roy’s face. His eyes softened and he bent low to capture her lips with his own. She sighed into his kiss, embracing the love he showed her. “I love you too.”

The memory of Havoc’s confession floated through her mind at that moment, broadening her smile.

“I must say, ma’am, from the way he smiles at that photo, he loves you a lot.”

“What?” Roy asked, noting how big her smile was.

“Nothing. I’m just happy to be with you.”

Roy hummed in agreement. He shifted his stance so that her body was pressed against his. Their cheeks rested against each other and when Roy spoke, his breath tickled her ear. It felt divine.

“I’m glad you’re here. These balls are always so boring.”

“You’ve been to more than one?” she asked, curious. She tried to think back to when he may have brought it up before but couldn’t find anything in her memory.

“Well, just one. It was after coming home from Ishval. It was a “celebration” of the war being over. It… Well, it wasn’t enjoyable in the slightest. Most of the time, Hughes and I just people watched. It was thrilling to watch the amount of ass kissing that went down that night. There were so many brown noses.”

Riza snorted, hard. She felt Roy laugh, the sound reverberating through her own body.

“It was nowhere near as good as tonight has been.”

Silence enveloped them, but it was Riza who broke it.

“I’m curious…”

Roy hummed in reply.

“Why didn’t you tell anyone about me?”

Roy met her gaze.

“I’m just wondering,” she reassured him.

He was quiet for a moment, contemplating his answer. “At first, I was told not to trust anyone by General Grumman. He’s kind of become my mentor over the years.” Riza resisted the urge to react to the news. She wasn’t even sure if Roy knew the General was her grandfather.

Was he here tonight? Riza wasn’t sure if she was ready to deal with that interaction just yet. She’d been told as a child there was bad blood between her grandfather and her father, so they cut ties and moved away. How would the General feel, knowing his granddaughter had married someone working so closely with him?

“So, I didn’t and kept my cards close to my chest. I know I can trust the boys, but everyone else…” His face screwed up. “There’s a very small pool of people that I can trust in East City Headquarters.”

“That sounds very paranoid, Roy.”

“With you on the line, I’m very paranoid about this kind of thing.”

Riza thought he’d be joking, even just a little bit, but when she pulled back to look at his face, she saw his expression was serious. While she was glad, it didn’t sit well with her. It spoke of danger.

“But,” Roy continued. “It’s been a few years and Grumman has filled me in on who’s best to avoid and who can be trusted. I became more comfortable with the idea. I never denied it when people asked, but I didn’t want to project it, just in case. Plus, I’m not Maes Hughes, screaming about my family every two seconds,” he chuckled. “I don’t want to irritate people so much they began to hate me,” he winked.

“No, and I don’t blame you,” Riza agreed with an amused smile.

Roy wasn’t one for making grand gestures for her in front of an audience, and that was because he knew she’d hate the attention on her like that. And if no one at his work knew he was married, that didn’t matter to her really. She’d just been curious. He showed her, and her alone, how he felt about her. Everyone else didn’t matter, so long as she knew how much he loved her.

“I’m proud, in a way, that you played it so smartly.”

“Yeah?” Roy asked, seemingly surprised at her admission.

She nodded. “Like you said, ‘with my family on the line, I’d be very paranoid too.’” Her voice dropped in volume, causing Roy to press his cheek gently back against hers so he could hear her. “What you’re planning on doing is dangerous, and while I don’t like it for obvious reasons, I’d never hold it against you. After what you went through and seeing how it has affected you, I don’t want it to happen to anyone again either.”

Roy pulled away. She was trapped in his eyes, but Riza didn’t mind. She never would when it came to him. Taking a deep breath, she let it out in a rush, her decision made.

“You’ve got a good, solid, team behind you. I see that, now. It makes it less frightening for me, knowing you have this support behind you,” she admitted. “Before, in my mind, it was you against the whole world, and it was terrifying. But I see now that there are a lot of people who support you. Not just the core team. I’ve overheard others talking tonight, at the bar and around the room. Some people here really like you, Roy. They look up to you, and it soothes my nerves a little to know that there’s a lot of people who have your back. It’s not just me doing all the work,” she smiled wryly.

“Yes, but you do the best job out of everyone,” he murmured as he hugged her close to his chest. Smiling, she patted his back twice, affectionately, as he gave her body a tight squeeze.

Her hand found its way to his cheek when he pulled back. His eyes poured out with love for her, and it thrilled her to see it.

“Of course, I do the best job,” she replied, as if it was obvious. It made him laugh, a grin playing over his lips.

“You really do. Maybe I didn’t bring you up before because I wanted to keep you all to myself,” he grinned cheekily. “Since you do such a good job, after all.”

Riza stuck her tongue out at him, making him laugh again, but louder this time. His head tipped back slightly. It truly was a beautiful sight seeing Roy so carefree and happy. He deserved it.

The rest of the night was perfect. During the fast songs they took a break to return to the table with the men. They were greeted each time with enthusiasm and joy. She was goaded into telling them how she and Roy met. She kept some parts out. Her childhood experience was still very raw within her, and she didn’t feel like dragging the past back up. That was firmly behind her. The only thing that had been worth keeping from it had been Roy, and she was eternally thankful that she had.

Fuery – they’d all insisted on Riza calling them by their last names rather than their titles – asked what their wedding ceremony was like. Falman asked to see the ring, complimenting her stone and band, stating they were the perfect combination. Havoc bought them a round of drinks to celebrate their wedding, despite it being over two years ago. His reasoning was they’d all missed it, so now was as good a time as ever to make up for it. Breda agreed wholeheartedly and staggered after Havoc to order the drinks with them. As they walked, they slung their arms around each other’s shoulders, slapping each other on the back amicably.

They were a good bunch, these boys, and Riza was officially initiated as “one of the team” that night.

Rebecca finally found her shortly after their “wedding toast”.

“There you are!” she exclaimed, flopping down into the chair next to Riza. “I’ve been looking all over for you! Where have you been?” she accused.

“Right here,” she smiled. Rebecca was slightly drunk, her cheeks pink and flushed from the alcohol, but she wasn’t fully drunk. Riza had seen her drunk a few times, and this wasn’t it. This was “merry Rebecca” – the Rebecca who had no filter and no shame. Riza had envied her confidence from day one and strived to be as good as her someday. Since meeting the brunette, it had done wonders for her confidence. It was freeing, and Riza was very thankful. Rebecca had also taken Riza to the East City HQ shooting range, smuggling her in late at night like they were a couple of teenagers. Riza had learned to shoot in the forests outside her home as a child, and she was pleased to see that she hadn’t lost her touch over the years.

Rebecca had done so much for Riza since they’d met, and tonight may just be the night she repayed her big time. It might not, however it was worth taking the risk. Plus, she deserved a little fun.

“Have you met Second Lieutenant Jean Havoc?” Riza asked, gesturing towards the blonde man who was slouched in his chair at the table. He smirked over at her, upon hearing his name, but he froze when he spotted Rebecca.

“No, I haven’t,” Rebecca stated slowly, eyeing him carefully.

“Havoc, this is my friend, Rebecca. The lovely lady I was telling you about earlier?”

Rebecca snorted. “Lovely,” she muttered underneath her breath, as if offended to be referred to in such a way.

“Uh, yeah. I remember.” He seemed to have sobered up rather quickly, Riza noticed, amused. He sat up straighter in his chair, like a bird preening at the prospect of a mate.

“I’m anything but a lady tonight, my friend,” she stated boldly, rising from her chair and striding over to Havoc. He watched her like a deer caught in the headlights.

Riza snickered when she noticed Rebecca had put extra sway into her hips as she walked. “And have you been talking about me, Riza Mustang?” she accused good naturedly, casting her eyes back over her shoulder.

“You said you wanted to find yourself a good man,” she shrugged with a grin.

“You,” she commanded Havoc. “Come with me.”

“What?” he asked, looking quite terrified.

Rebecca grasped him by his biceps and lifted Havoc from the chair. He yelped, almost falling over in his haste. Then, with a coy look over her shoulder and a wink, she dragged him over to the dance floor.

“God, help him,” Roy stated, taking up the chair beside her, the one Rebecca had just vacated.

Riza chuckled. “I agree. He’ll have his hands full with that one.”

“It’ll be good for him,” Roy stated, as if he was a proud parent watching his child go on their first date. “Either way, it will be character building.”

Riza snorted. “Rebecca can be lethal. I hope he’s strong enough for it.”

“He’s a good man,” Roy stated, his tone taking on a surprising sincerity after all their joking. “He’ll be good for her, I think.”

It certainly seemed that way, because not even half an hour later, Riza spotted the two of them slipping out the ballroom, hand in hand. Riza grinned when she spotted it. She was happy for her friend. Havoc seemed like her type – tall, handsome, and probably with some cash to play about with. He was a military man, so that was a given.

That would be a conversation for later.

All in all, it was a wonderful night. They took a taxi home, more than buzzed from the alcohol. Both Roy and Riza whispered and giggled to each other in the back like a couple of teenagers. With excitement in his eyes, Roy led her up to their apartment with a grin, his hand gripping hers tightly as they ran up the stairs. Once inside, Riza locked the apartment door in anticipation, only to be backed up against it. Roy’s kisses were feverish as he slipped her jacket off her shoulders. Riza gave him the same treatment, ridding him of his tuxedo jacket and leaving it to fall in a heap on the floor. It was expensive, as all his clothes were, but Riza didn’t think he’d care. Not right now.

They stumbled their way to the bedroom, bumping against the walls and breaking apart to laugh. It made Riza feel young again. It was like they were newlyweds on their honeymoon.

Roy held her close as they drifted off, both spent. Riza gripped his hand tightly, smiling down at their joined hands.

“I love you,” he murmured sleepily into her hair. Riza smiled, feeling sleep tug at her tired body, enticing it into unconsciousness. If she gave in, her only regret would be cutting this beautiful moment short. She wanted to live in it forever.

“I love you too, Roy. So much that it leaves me breathless sometimes.” Her admission was bolder than usual, but it was the truth. It came right from her heart. The alcohol had managed to pry it out of her grasp, and Riza was glad. At that moment, it was something she wanted him to know.

Roy hummed happily behind her, adjusting his grip on her waist, tugging her tightly against him. “You’re the best thing that’s ever happened to me.”

“What about Mia?” she yawned, letting out a quick laugh.

“That angel is the light of my life,” he stated, his speech broken as he began to drift off. “But you are the warmth.”

Riza smiled and settled back against him. His breathing evened, signalling he was asleep.

“And you are mine.”

#royai #royai fic #royai fanfic #royai au #emma writes #the way it was

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dawggcs · 5 years ago

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all american twilight rejects

pippa, member @ the red council:

usually chill but going through a rebellious phase (probably a mid life crisis but being immortal u know)

she’s turned by kamala centuries ago bc she was about to die after being beaten to near death yikes

very calm and peaceful, also very curious about everything

kinda snobbish so she likes keeping traditions and whatever

tends to coddle everyone in the clan and it 10/10 makes them sick but they all secretly love it (just bc i said so aight u can fite me on this)

she’s not too social outside her clan, doesn’t trust other vamps and prefers to stay quiet if they ever have any visitors

hayoung, member @ clan 3:

a youngster, she’s just recently come out of her immortality depression after seeing his late husband die probably lmfao

she’s one of those that got turned against her wishes and was bitter about it. she focused on watching over her family to avoid thinking about it and now has to deal with it, albeit slowly. she probably avoids the topic by watching her children now that her former husband died.

after her ‘awakening’ she didn’t try to get in contact with her human family. she saw them mourn her enough and kept a safe distance.

she’s a lil scaredy cat so she just follows whatever orders ppl give her lmao

tries to cling to her humanity somewhat, she’s one of the vamps that avoids feedings and stretches them out as much as she can.

she’s got a thing for crystal work so her house is probably filled with it :/

jaehwa, member @ clan 3:

he actually asked to be turned. his family has a history of it and he’s one of the oldest, most influential members in it.

used to be ruthless and messy during his first 200 yrs but then he collected himself lmao

he keeps tabs on his family line, constantly checking in on ppl. he turns a few people on his bloodline, though not many. junseo (he refers to her by that name only) included.

he’s also big on tradition but is trying real hard at updating himself with the times

he used to be a notorious leader in his family’s clan but decided to take a break. he’s now enjoying life as a member in a different clan instead of being the one in charge.

he still advises the newer leaders of his family clan, though. keeps scrutiny on who wanna turn there after he had to disposed of 60 or so members after a riot a decade ago.

atticus, member @ clan 3:

not that old. he was an experiment of sorts since a young vamp wanted to see if he could build an army and started turning ppl at random. atticus was among them.

however, this bitch just straight up turned his back and searched for other vamps that vibed with him more, didn’t care about being turned either.

as a human he was struggling to make ends meet and didn’t have a family of his own, instead staying with his parents. in a way, being turned felt like a huge weight was off his shoulders.

he’s really just trying to survive, has probably contemplated how he could die but doesn’t actively pursuing that. it’s an idea he toys with in case he ever gets tired of ‘living’.

aggressive, he just kinda likes fighting and is good at it. he’s a brute force kind of guy who has been learning about tactics and strategy now.

the thing he misses the most about being human is eating. he’s particularly wistful whenever he sees plums (unless these vamps can eat in which case i’ll take this off lmao).

yer a wizard

lester, member @ the pentacle:

comes from a respected fam of witches but he lowkey a mess. his family is well versed within dark magic and they keep high standards as to what a member ought to be like. in a way, he’s the shamed kid in his family tree.

honestly he’s terrible at incantations and spells, but is an a+ summoner. very few people know this, however, as he’s tried to keep it hushed as his own little vengeance against his family.

the neighbourhood guy tbfh, friendly and chatty with everyone he crosses paths with

he’s book smarts, if anyone ever needs to know about any spells, potions, ingredients, whatever --- they consult with him. the witchcraft walking encyclopedia for any questions or research. if he doesn’t know the answer himself, he always knows where to search for it.

he likes cats, has 2 and they’re his life.

ritual sacrifice though no one except his sisters know. he’s somewhere among the living and death, which is the reason he’s so good at summonings.

lulu, member @ the pentacle:

older identical twin of lola, their parents have a thing with names with ‘l’ bc they supposedly bring good luck to the family.

she’s really embarrassed of lester all the time.

the twins share a close bond and are usually seen together, they’re talented and help upheld the fam reputation lmfao

lulu specializes in potions and projections.

she’s the kinder twin, more polite. she’s also the one who likes to think things through.

has a thing for anything with turtles in it and owns about 5 tortoises that all roam wild in the house.

though she doesn’t have anything against other species, she doesn’t go out of her way to mingle with them. in a way, she’s the one who keeps up with the family’s snobbish ways of considering witches a scale above the rest.

lola, member @ the pentacle:

younger identical twin of lulu.

she actually enjoys spending time with his brother. he kinda teaches her how to be more patient and less confrontational.

her speciality are curses lmfao and talismans

she’s a risk taker, gets in trouble all the time, though doesn’t typically face any repercussions bc she’s that good. it also helps that her sis and her bro help her out always asldjfadsf

she loves iguanas, has 3 and they all roam around with lulu’s tortoise lmfao

she loves milkshakes, 15/10 times you’ll see her stopping by to get one.

she loves, loves hanging out with other species. the more diversity, the more trouble there can be.

sasha, member @ the coven of the moon:

athena’s older sis. they’re the first two people to show signs of magic in their family after a looooong time. they’re kinda exploring and rolling with it.

the sisters decide to join different covens in their search for answers and guidance. they share information constantly.

she’s decent at any topic, doesn’t really stand out in any as she has a avarage control over them all. (will develop an affinity for light magic and healing in particular, aided by water).

she loves singing, probably does it all the time and people are sick of her bc of it

loves to have fun, will definitely jump at any given opportunity to spice things up

kinda mischievous, though she tries to keep in mind the rules so as not to cross them

puppies (liza, 2020)

amaia, member @ the boldclaw pack:

older sister to kiseon, she baby that kid always and it probably embarrasses him

she’s right hand and tends to be more patient than other ‘alphas’. if anything rub her the wrong way though, she gonna snap in no time

really, she just wants everyone to feel safe like that’s her main goal in life

used to be very weak and sickly as a child so when she matured ppl were surprised, esp when she started making her way onto the higher ranks in the pack

although pack life consumes most of her energy, amaia tries hard to figure how to keep up a life outside of it. she’s the one who encourages people to try out different things and paths.

arthur, member @ clan 6:

loves working out, spends a lot of time with his bro bc of it. they have a thing against shirts, aimee and i already established this for everyone’s benefit bYE

he’s actually very touchy, so he’s always finding ways to be in physical contact with people

he a lil dumb but it ok bc he has a good heart. u know what, i really want u all to think seth clearwater when u see this man lmfao

he likes betting, probs always plays for dumb things like who’s going to get yelled at first or whatever

he likes exploring on his own, probably spends a lot of time outside because of it. it sometimes gives his pack a headache, though he’s always there when they need him to.

zane, member @ clan 6:

appearances fooling ppl bc he out there looking like he gonna be in charge but really zane the biggest softie out there lmao

he’s the one trying to avoid conflict and looking at alternatives for solutions

shy and quiet, he just keep silent to let things unfold as they should

despite hating physical altercation, he still keeps up training so as to not be dead weight. he’s good at it and even teaches the younger members.

he’d 10/10 die for anyone he cared about, stupid loyal puppy

he used to keep away from anything related to his species. possibly avoided any type of relationship in that regard bc he really wanted to be normal. when he found out that there’s a whole world of species out there, he started working on coming to terms with. at times he still struggles and wishes he could live independently but he also knows that he likes being in a group.

chonglin, member @ the boldclaw pack:

unlike his meme-y name LMAO he’s very serious

he’s an action kinda guy, though. always the first to jump in, albeit a lil recklessly. ppl sometimes have to hold him by the neck or he’ll get into trouble lmao

he finds the notion of a werewolf adopting a dog fascinating but has not yet found The One for him. he’s not giving up and is still looking.

he likes clever people and is always reading up on some new topic for more fun conversations

he’s very open to species mingling and enjoys being friendly with others. he’s a lil bit more careful around humans, though around other supernaturals he’s v. chill and doesn’t hide his nature ja feel

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mnemememory · 6 years ago

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happy people

They’re probably made up of 90% alcohol and 10% spite at this point. And good intentions. Spite and good intentions.

(or; "it's what molly would have wanted")

It begins – well.

Intentions had never really been a big part of the Mighty Nein before the series of unfortunate events that had begotten kidnapping and death, but that hadn’t stopped good deeds from squeezing themselves into the group’s shared vocabulary every now and again. Even as individuals, doing the right thing (though annoying) somehow was more appealing than just sitting back and watching the world burn. Depending on circumstances.

So here they are, sitting back and watching the world burn. Nott is, predictably, the one who says it:

“It’s what Molly would have wanted.”

Beau’s eye twitches, because she’s somehow become the most sensitive to mentions of Mollymauk Tealeaf, despite the group having all-round misgivings when it came to conversations on the dead. “What? No.”

Nott gestures to the – whatever it is that is unfurling behind them. It’s a mess, is what it is. A lot of blood. Some fire (somehow, even with Caleb snoozing peacefully in the back of the cart, there always seems to be fire). The screaming has mostly stopped, but that’s probably more because they’ve moved out of audial range than anything else.

Up front, Fjord surveys the open road glumly. “I just wanted to buy some food.”

“Don’t be silly,” Jester says, sprawling out next to him and patting the top of his head. He makes a valiant effort to dodge, but it’s no good, and he sullenly gives over to his fate with all the good grace that seventy-three hours without sleep can give. None of them are in a particularly pleasant mood, but Nott thinks that as soon as they get away from that broken excuse for a settlement, things will get back to normal.

(Burning down the world is sometimes the right thing to do, in the end).

(Funny, that).

Nott has the buttons on Fjord’s vest mixed in with the rest of her collection; she has Jester’s ribbons looping through the holes in her bag; she has three of Beau’s throwing stars tucked tight into the lining of her coat. Nott has a satchel of Deuce’s tea pressed up against a paper-thin flower, both hidden inside one of Caleb’s old books.

Don’t steal from happy people, Molly said. Nott is trying.

The second time, Nott is less drunk, and also has had more sleep. It makes the reference simultaneously more and less tasteless, which seems on brand.

“C’mon,” she wheedles, tugging gently at the edge of Caleb’s jacket. She’s learned just the right amount of pressure to put on the fabric without making the movement overly insistent – too much, and she’s being pushy. Too little, and she doesn’t want it enough. Humans are weird, but Nott is determined to learn all of their strange idiosyncrasies, if only to be better able to dupe them. (Oh, and also to walk around without getting arrested, Nott wants that too). “It’ll be fun.”

“No,” Caleb says, with all the petulance of a teenager. Nott had thought she’d been lucky to skip out on that stage of developmental hell, but hey, at least she can cross teenage rebellion off her list of life experiences. Children these days. No respect for their parents.

“Caleb,” Nott sighs. The rest of the group are playing hooky doing some very important serious business – that is, trying to find some freelance jobs so they don’t starve to death. Being good people or whatever that’s supposed to mean isn’t really cheap. Nott hoards gold, but that doesn’t mean she can keep supporting these freeloaders forever. They need to come up with better investment strategies, and fast, or Nott is going to have to do it for them. Accounting hasn’t ever been one of her skills before, but travelling with these morons has helped her to refine down the important things in life. Like keeping track of party funds. And shooting straight while drunk. (Well, she’s had that last one for a while).

“Nott,” he sighs, right back at her. Nott makes a face up at him. They grow up so fast…

“It’s what Molly would have wanted,” she says.

Caleb’s eyebrow ticks up. “Molly would have wanted us to leave the rest of the group for an unknown period of time to go – gambling.”

Nott nods, vigorously. Jester’s been teaching her a few things she hadn’t heard of before (probably because they were really illegal, but Jester didn’t know that, and Nott isn’t going to tell her your mum is basically a genius when it comes to counting cards). The city rests on a riverbed of gold – “if you want to make a fortune, come here” is the unofficial motto, tacked onto “to all the people in need of a disposable income; who have no future plans for success; who are desperate around to gamble everything you own in a single sitting”. Nott loves places like this, she really does.

Though she should probably stop saying that within hearing distance of the rest of the group, because they’re trying so hard to make this “we’re definitely absolutely 100% the good guys now” thing stick. There have been…slips ups…but Nott is confident that with enough perseverance mixed into this powder keg (ha, get it?) of interpersonal family planning and parental issues, they can make the world explode in the best kind of way.

“Molly would have definitely wanted us to leave the rest of the group behind for three guys, Caleb, that’s all I’m asking, to go gambling. I’m very sure that Molly would have been in support of this plan.”

Caleb is still giving Nott the sceptical eyebrows, but Nott is right (Nott is always right) and Caleb should just give up now and accept this. She’s never gambled with actual money before (Jester trades in chores, which is fun right up until Nott loses) so this is going to be a thrilling new experience. And also Caleb will be there, watching her back and keeping her safe from the undoubtedly fierce card sharks that will be waiting in the seedy taverns and grand casinos (there are a lot of grand casinos around here). Nott has heard enough stories about gambling – mostly from Jester, now that she thinks about it – to know that she will definitely need her son there, watching, to make sure that no one else cheats.

Caleb blows out a breath, long and low. He looks around the intersection, which is full of people shouting obnoxious insults at bystanders from behind foods carts, which seems a little counterproductive to the whole “selling of wares” thing, but hey, what does Nott know? Nothing, Nott knows nothing about making money, except that being drunk and killing things generally provides favourable results. In her experience, anyway.

“I suppose I cannot argue with that,” he says.

Caleb has to set fire to the casino, because of course. Of course he does. Nott will never be able to go anywhere ever again without having to set fire to something, she just knows it.

Third time, and it isn’t even Nott – which is progress! Nott thinks that it’s progress, anyway; on the downside, Beau starts a barfight, but that’s not uncommon, so Nott is calling this a ‘win’ in her books.

They’re drinking, heavily, because if there’s one thing this group knows how to do, it’s drink. They’re probably made up of 90% alcohol and 10% spite at this point. And good intentions. Spite and good intentions.

“I just –” Beau says, with the kind of slurred voice that only comes with mixing caffeine and liquor. “I just miss her. A lot.”

Fjord sits next to her and pats her on the back. It’s a rhythmic, absent kind of gesture, like he started because of a reason, some reason, there was definitely a reason, and how he can’t quite get his arm to stop moving. Nott predicts that he’ll be passing out soon, the amateur. She takes another swig of her flask (less quality, more burning familiarity) and leans into Caleb’s warm weight.

It’s good, being here, watching her family make a mess out of themselves. Painful, in a way, but good. Letting things fester under loose bandages is a good way to lose a limb (Nott knows, she’s seen it) (she’s done it) (there is nothing more terrifying than watching your body disintegrate in on itself). Here, talking and drinking and crying their eyes out (no judgement!), Nott is watching them sew open wounds back together.

Now all the needs is Yasha, and she’ll almost have the full set.

“I should message her!” Jester says, sipping at her milk and watching her drunken friends with mild fascination. She still hasn’t really gotten the hang of socialising with drunk people, for all she’s very good at following weird conversation tangents. “I can definitely message her – we haven’t seen Yasha in ages, she’ll be wanting to know where we are –”

Beau blinks. Well, sort of – one of her eyelids goes down, but the other one is a little slower to follow. It’s a weird parody of a wink, is what it is. Nott snickers into her flask, but quietly, so she doesn’t draw attention to herself. She’s happy to let things fade into the background, for now. Look at them! Being so responsible, sorting out their relationship issues. Nott is so proud.

“Yeah,” Beau says, with the dawning light of drunk revelation. “Yeah! You should message her. Say – say, er –”

“Tell her we miss her,” Fjord says. His arm is still patting Beau’s shoulder.

“And how to find us,” Deuce says.

Caleb hmms. “And that we may have another big job coming up, soon.”

“And that she should take care of herself,” Nott adds.

“Yeah – yeah,” Beau says. She clears her throat and scrapes her chair back a little, like she’s trying to get more room. It slams into the foot of a passing waitress, causing her to stumble forward and drop a rather large bowl of soup onto the head of a man on the next table over. “All of that. It’s what Molly would have wanted.”

Jester frowns. “That’s a lot, you guys.”

(“WHO DID THAT?” the man roars, lurching drunkenly to his feet and swinging his meaty fists wide. The waitress ducks, and he brains the person of indeterminate gender sitting next to him.

“WHAT THE FUCK!”)

“Don’t worry, don’t worry, we’ll write it down,” Beau says. She paws at the table in front of her, like she’s waiting for a piece of paper to spring forth from the lacquered wood. After a few seconds of disappointment, she turns to stare forlornly to where Fjord is still patting on her back. “I’ve got a pen somewhere in my bag,” she says.

(“WHAT DID YOU JUST CALL ME?”

“YOU HEARD ME, YOU –!”)

Jester smiles and takes out her sketchbook.

(They don’t flinch at the name. Nott is counting this as progress).

It sort of becomes a thing, after that.

Beau is a tipping point; she’s the leverage, especially when it comes to mentioning Molly. Without the threat of her flying into fits of rage of despair (none of them knows which one is worse), they relax their chokehold. Well, Nott relaxes her chokehold, which is good, because she’s never been much for staying silent.

“It’s what Molly would have wanted,” Caleb says, resigned, when they somehow (she isn’t sure how, she will never be sure how) manage to bluff their way into the festival line-up. They are not musicians. They cannot play instruments. Nott has heard (at one point or another) all of them sing, and of the group, only Jester can do a passable imitation of pleasant. This is going to end in disaster.

(It does, of course, end in disaster).

“It’s what Molly would have wanted,” Fjord says, lightly teasing, when they hijack another boat (what is it with this group and boats?) to make sail down the coast, human cargo ferried safely to the proper authorities. The group has taken a somewhat dim view of kidnapping, and hasn’t been overly thrilled to find the hold full of scared, dead-eyed people.

“It’s what Molly would have wanted,” Nott says, firmly, when she swipes a jelly doughnut from a rude man with a goatee.

(Don’t steal from happy people).

Yasha comes back to the group with all the drama and mystery they have come to expect from her; which is, she trips of Beau’s sprawled leg and then claims confusion at finding them here, in this tavern, which Jester had mentioned in her last message three hours ago. Yasha is fooling no one. Nott wonders why she even bothers anymore. What does she think they’re going to say? No, go away?

Nott wants to laugh. If she’s learned anything from this group of sanity-deficient people, it’s that family sticks together. She’s not letting any of her children go and ruin themselves without being there to help. Oh, well. Yasha will learn.

(Nott is never going to get the full set, but for this, for Caleb and Jester and Beau and Fjord and Deuce and Yasha, she will settle).

(It’s as much a concession to fate as she’s ever going to give).

Caleb is telling a story, face animated, arms spreading out in lively, sweeping gestures. He knocks his mug off of the table and onto the ground, the ale spilling onto the floorboards and all over poor Frumpkin’s head.

The group stare at the hissing, furious cat in a beat of silence. Then Caleb says, almost automatically, “It’s what Molly would have wanted.”

Yasha pauses at that, tankard halfway to her mouth.

Then she throws back her head and laughs.

#critical role #critical role campaign 2 #nott the brave #caleb widogast #the mighty nein #mollymauk tealeaf #beauregard #caduceus clay #yasha #fjord #jester #i think i'm funny #Nott is a Good Parent #who just wants what's best for her kids #her adorable disaster kids #100% not serious #my writing #fanfic

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finlaybeard-blog · 5 years ago

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narrative-prospector · 6 years ago

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Life is Strange: Before the Storm Game Review (7.5 / 10)

**SPOILER ALERT** (If you’d like to avoid spoilers, but still receive my input on the game, the Intro and Final Thoughts will always remain spoiler free.)

Intro:

I was recently speaking with a friend who described herself as “anti-video game.” When I asked her about it, she responded with the common belief that she found them a waste of time. In a market dominated by MOBAs and Battle Royales, I decided to make my case for video games from the narrative side of things, asking her if she had heard of (the original) Life is Strange game. She hadn’t, but immediately wanted to know why it was any different, why it wasn’t a waste of time, and how it changed / impacted me for the better.

I explained to her that Life is Strange reminded me of the great struggles each and every person faces. It shed light on the everyday ways, big and small, that I could help make burdens lighter for others. It reminded me that every choice in life matters, and not only did it show me ways to love, but it inspired me to love better, to cherish every beautiful moment, and to be grateful for every person whose life touches mine, or at the very least not to take their presence for granted. Needless to say, after our conversation, she was very interested in playing the game.

This power to change me is what made the first Life is Strange so great, and additionally what made me so eager jump into the 2017 prequel series, Life is Strange: Before the Storm. However, from its early stages, developer Deck Nine made it clear that Before the Storm would be a different game, and after playing it, I found that indeed it was. In some ways it surprised and thrilled me, and in other ways it returned to that same nostalgia I missed from the original game. There were, of course, also some elements of the game I would have done differently. I’ll give my thoughts on the game below, focusing mostly on its narrative elements, and as always leave a summarized TLDR (spoiler free!) version in the Final Thoughts section. Thanks for giving me a read, and here’s to making and playing the best games possible!

What Worked:

Effectively chronicles the evolution of Chloe. Before the Storm (BTS) takes the player through key events of Chloe’s past, which made her into the familiar blue haired punk from the original Life is Strange (LIS 1). It explores flashbacks and dream sequences of her father’s death and Max’s departure, all while showcasing other significant moments of Chloe’s formation: David’s moving in, her expulsion from Blackwell, and, of course, the relationship with Rachel Amber, powerful enough to break her by its ending. Every step along the way of Chloe’s path seems appropriate and motivated, and it’s fascinating to witness the moments that make Chloe who she is when you meet her in LIS 1. It’s well done, and something I really enjoyed.

Equally satisfying paths of friendship and romance. Just like in the original game, BTS unapologetically allows the relationship between its strong female protagonists to take a romantic turn. However, in an even braver move, the game also allows the player to have them remain friends, sending the story down a path no less developed or fulfilling. In a world where saying "we're just friends" is a strategy for rejecting unwanted lovers and the friend zone is something to be dreaded (speaking from personal experience are we?), this series continues to advocate for emotional intimacy in friendships, inspiring us to go deeper, love better and in a more supportive way, reminding us how life-giving (and often under appreciated) our friendships can be. This was a thematic thread I was hoping to see expanded upon from the LIS I, and once again, Deck Nine didn't disappoint.

Beautifully interwoven symbols & motifs. Pay close attention to anything related to ravens, fire, eyes, or lying. These all start small, but build powerfully and are visited throughout, tying the story together. The game also revisits images from LIS 1: the doe, storm, totem pole, squirrels, etc. drawing parallels between the games through these symbols (Chloe’s raven to Max’s doe - the storm to the wildfire). And while Max left her mark on the world through her photography, Chloe prefers a more literal approach. Her graffiti pen tags (along with her outfit selections) allow the player to further interact with these symbols, in addition to making fun collectibles to hunt down. It was really neat to notice these little details which the writers and designers crafted with care, and it definitely added to the impact of the story.

A nostalgic return to Arcadia Bay. The contrast of new adventures unfolding in familiar locations was a really neat element of the prequel series. The game provides the player with plenty of moments to simply take in their surroundings alongside a killer soundtrack (more on that later), and I definitely took advantage of it, especially in Chloe’s room, Frank’s RV, the junkyard, and all over Blackwell. It was so evocative just to see these places again, and interesting to get Chloe’s reflections on them. Like Chloe, these places also evolve as her backstory plays out (e.g. junkyard hangout room, Chloe’s truck) providing the player with a deeper understanding of the LIS 1 world’s origins.

The soundtrack. Deck Nine placed their game’s music in different hands than Dontnod, but ones no less apt. Daughter did an amazing job creating haunting, emotional, nostalgic, atmospheric songs to accompany Chloe’s journey, both diegetic (like Skip’s song) and not. The game also features other singles like Speedy Ortiz’s “No Below,” which perfectly capture what Chloe’s going through at this point in her life. It’s a soundtrack I simply had to purchase after playing through the game, and when I’m out and about and the songs come up on shuffle, I’m immediately taken back. I almost start expecting to see objects highlighted in white as I look at them.

Morally and philosophically thought provoking themes. Of course, like LIS 1, the game explores friendship, love, care, and trust, but overall, the central question the game asks is: Is it better to protect someone you love with a lie, or honor them with the truth? Whether or not lying, or concealing the truth, is always wrong is a very interesting question, and it’s one I’ve thought a lot about (I’m actually working on a theology essay about it - but that’s another blog). And, while it’s a question other games have explored (I’m looking at you, The Last of Us) the game provides a unique take on the question by having the player answer it with his/her final choice, ending the game with a more philosophical but significantly less dramatic choice than LIS 1, but nonetheless thought provoking in its own right.

What Got in the Way:

Chloe resists player shaping too much, much more than Max. With Max, I felt like her power of time control was in my hands. I could wield it for mischief, exact my justice as judge, jury, and executioner, or show mercy and love. Also, this power combined with the game’s mechanic of allowing you to restart from any point in the story made it easier to play Max right, ensuring that her story played out the way you wanted it to. Naturally, without Max’s time powers, Chloe’s decisions weigh more and are harder to undo. While this choice was intentional on behalf of the studio, rather than teaching me something about Chloe or life, I just wound up Googling the results of the choices more often or regretting not doing so as I’m smashing buttons, desperately trying to skip cut-scenes after loading a previous save. Basically, reversing your choices is way too tedious. Before you make a choice, get ready to live with it.

Too many unconnected dots between BTS and the original game. While BTS uncovers much of LIS 1’s backstory, it still leaves many questions unanswered. For example, what kind of relationship did Rachel have with Frank? Or, how did Rachel first become involved with Nathan’s photography experiment gone-wrong? These were things I was expecting to understand before the game’s end, and I was surprised to see the credits roll first. If it were up to me, I would have gone through all of that and ended the game just after the start of LIS 1, when Chloe reunites with Max.

Humanizes the villains until there’s no one left to hate. Almost. At one point or another in the game, Chloe comes up against Drew, David, Principal Wells, Nathan, Mr. Prescott, Mr. Amber, Sheldon, and Damon as adversaries. With the exception of Damon, who is this game’s Mr. Jefferson (the creepy bad guy who’s evil to be evil) the game attempts to generate sympathy for nearly every antagonist. For example, Drew’s only a mean drug dealer because he’s trying to financially support his little brother and dad. David really cares about Chloe and Joyce, but he lost his best friend in the army. Wells is just trying to protect the school, Nathan was bullied into his perversions, Mr. Prescott loves Rachel too much and is trying to protect her, etc. Sheldon’s genuinely a creep but if you give him what he deserves and tell Damon he’s a snitch, you have to read his desperate texts begging for Mercy.

I actually think the game did a great job humanizing certain characters (David, Drew, Mr. Amber), but I think it was confusing to try to arouse sympathy in the player for Nathan, for example, before his commits his terrible crime. What really put me over the edge was finding a letter in the hospital from Nathan’s dad where he offers to anonymously cover Mikey’s hospital costs. We see him bullying his son, he’s supposed to be the reason Nathan turns to his evil ways, and yet we’re supposed to believe deep down he’s really a good guy?

I get the point. Real people aren’t black and white, good and evil, it’s always more complicated than that. Still, I would draw a distinction between understanding why someone is evil and actually feeling bad for them, and instead of cheapening his power as a threat, I would have left Mr. Prescott among the Darth Sidiouses of Before the Storm.

Initially jarring change of voice actors. It just so happens that I began playing Guerrilla Games’ Horizon: Zero Dawn as I started BTS, so I felt like Chloe pulled a Scooby-Doo: The Movie and transported her soul into Aloy’s body, (Ashly Burch voices Chloe in the original game and the protagonist of Horizon: Zero Dawn - quite excellently, in fact) but the change in voice actors shook me up at first. Though it seems like Deck Nine made an effort to get most of the original voice actors, you’ll notice the new voices for David and Chloe. This seems to be the result of a SAG-AFTRA strike, so it wasn’t really under anyone’s control, but still, it would have been nice to have the same actor for the game’s main character. Took me about an episode to get over it and used to it.

Ends on a sour note. Chloe’s relationship with Rachel made Before the Storm one of the most beautiful stories I’d experienced, and it almost ends on a nostalgic note, panning through photographs that capture their memories together. Instead, the game ends in that infamous dark room where Rachel is drugged and photographed before her murder, with Chloe’s missed calls blowing up her phone. This immediately ripped me from the warm, reflective feeling I experienced over Chloe and Rachel and instead brought back the rage and disgust I had for Nathan and Mr. Jefferson. Whether by ending the game when Chloe meets Max (as I’ve suggested earlier), or ending it on Chloe’s last moments with Rachel, maybe even allowing them to exchange some touching (final - as the player knows it) words, I would’ve ended the game in the mood it so effectively created where I felt both sad to let Rachel go, and grateful for the mark she made on Chloe. Ending it on that final scene seemed like a missed opportunity.

Final Thoughts: (Rating: 7.5/10)

For players who’ve never experienced Life is Strange before, I’d recommend starting with the original series. For those who enjoyed the game, Before the Storm is a definite should-play. It’s worth it for the return to Arcadia Bay’s landscapes and characters alone, but you’ll also discover what Blackwell looked like before Max, who the mysterious Rachel Amber really was, why nearly everyone adored her, and what transformed Chloe from Max’s pirate-obsessed childhood best friend into the blue-haired girl waving a gun around in the girl’s bathroom. However, if you’re expecting it to be too much like the first game, you may be disappointed. To get the most out of it, I’d recommend trying to step into Chloe’s shoes and playing the character as true to herself as possible, rather than trying to shape her choices according to your own preferences. Allow yourself to act impulsively, make mistakes, and brace for the consequences. Undoing Chloe’s actions proves a lot more tedious than those of the time-traveling Max, so try to do it right the first time. Oh, and don’t expect too many answers. You’ll get plenty of great ones, but just like the native spirits of the raven and doe, they have to leave some mysteries unsolved. In the words of Rachel Amber, “life needs a little mystery,” and after all, it’s mystery that makes life strange.

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clanwarrior-tumbly · 7 years ago

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What are your headcanons for the Crankegos?? (Saw someone call Ethan's egos that and I LOVE that name!)

Ooooooooo I never thought anyone would ask.

*cracks knuckles* Well strap in because I have a LOT that I wanna share~ ^^

@yahoo-protection-squad Hope you don’t mind the tag, I figured you may like to read this, too.

Saintgameplays (Saint)

-He’s a pope, what do you expect?-He tries his best to keep up with the cool kids.-But he will lecture them if he catches them cursing.-Actually gets along with Wilford surprisingly well.-Integrates memes and Vine references into his teachings.-“And I say unto you: Adam and Eve are my OTP and the only thing I vape is the Holy Ghost. Amen” is his favorite.-Signature phrase is “Bless up fam”.-V terrified/wary of Dark, Anti, Blank, and Corroded.-If he has to be in the same room with any of them he will always carry Holy Water in a mini-spray bottle.-He’s actually a very good listener.-The other Crank/Iplier/Septic egos often go to him to confess or simply get things off their chest (e.g. Chase with his divorce and Wilford with the people he’s murdered) and he will always keep them a secret no matter what.-Just a v pure and good dude in general who has done no wrong.

Mad Mike (Mike)

-Runs an ice cream shop and an ice cream truck (changes outfits depending on which job he’s doing).-And he’s also a drug dealer-Once owned a successful business but it shutdown after many lawsuits regarding drugs being found in the frozen desserts.-To this day, though, he still sells them illegally just because he can.-A LOT little bit on the crazy and giggly side.-Anti and Wilford have taken a liking to him because of his insane nature and his clever and malicious schemes.-Does harbor a soft spot for kids, though, and will give them non-drugged ice cream sandwiches.-But even so Chase still doesn’t trust him around his kids.-Steals drugs from Dr. Iplier’s clinics after his drug ring became busted by Silver Shepherd and Jackieboy Man.-Likes to hum/sing his “Mad Mike” song a lot.-Loves to wink and say “wink-wonk”, too.-V flirtatious.-Always manages to evade the cops no matter what.-Has the quickest reflexes out of all the Crankegos, so he’s excellent at dodging gunfire and making quick escapes.

Corroded Crank (Corroded)

-One of two of Ethan’s dark egos.-Has a rusted, grey/brown skin tone.-Under the surface he has metal in place of bones and wires in place of veins, although his blood and organs are still human.-Eyes are hollow, empty sockets as opposed to being pure black.-Has incredibly neat handwriting even though his hand trembles violently when he writes.-Much like Anti he is capable of glitching around and creating hallucinations (mostly in the form of hushed, unintelligible whispers and clones of himself).-Also capable of inducing paranoia on his victims.-Despises Ethan because he believes he was only created to serve as a cheap “advertising strategy” for the 5-year anniversary posters.-Because of that he will threaten anyone who tries to use him for their own personal benefit.-Will also lash out at anyone who thinks he’s just “copying” the other dark egos.-Gets along well with Dark, Anti, and Blank.-Although at times he does like to tease Blank about his anxiety.-He is actually rather protective of Yahoo and doesn’t want anyone to take advantage of him, either.

Blankgameplays (Blank)

-The second, but less malicious, dark ego.-Is the literal embodiment of Ethan’s anxiety and nightmares.-Has very bad anxiety issues which cause him to mumble a lot and make mountains out of molehills.-He is somewhat self-conscious of his black eyes and is afraid he will scare people away if he looks at them.-Suffers from haphephobia, although he will accept hugs from people he considers as friends.-Hates being compared to Anti and Dark, as he does not wish to hurt his creator nor manipulate his fans.-Cries a lot, and when he does he sheds black, oil-like tears.-During a breakdown he’ll mumble unintelligible gibberish for a while without pausing to take a breath (his worst one had him mumbling for a solid hour).-Should that happen he’ll only accept comfort from either one of the other Crank egos (except for Corroded who only taunts him) or someone that he trusts.-If Mike finds him in such a state, he will sit next to him and offer him ice cream, the best type of comfort food.-Tries his best to be a kind person and break the stereotype that all “dark” egos are automatically evil.-Saint is still apprehensive of him, but eventually he does see the good he’s trying to do and warms up to him.-Loves wearing baggy jackets/hoodies.-He’s also fascinated by plants, even the wilted and dried-out ones.-Bim would often lend him a couple of his plants and teach him how to properly take care of them.

Yahoogameplays (Yahoo)

-A search engine android similar to Google and Bing.-Speaks in a soft and sincere tone of voice.-His primary adjective is to “Answer questions as quickly as possible”.-When charging, his eyes will glow purple.-When fully charged he feels more energized that ever, as he’ll bounce around, laugh, and hug any friend that may be in the vicinity.-His special feature is in his left eye, which, upon activation, allows him to take X-Ray scans, see through walls, detect infrared light, and acquire any new information that is not already in his files.-He’s always willing to lend a hand to anyone that needs it.-Saint often asks him to look up Vines/memes/anything that is currently trending for him to incorporate in his teachings.-He’ll assist Mike if he needs advice on how to run a shop or what drugs are not too lethal to put into ice cream…despite him not approving of his business whatsoever.-He is usually the one Blank goes to for comfort, as he knows how to help him through his anxiety attacks.-Has an intense fear of glitches and water, due to the fact both can short-circuit him and corrupt his systems.-Because of this he avoids Anti at all costs, but he’s fine around Corroded, who he sees as an older brother of sorts.

Bernice-The sort of “Mother Hen” and “Mama Bear” of the group.-Absolutely LOVES the color red.-Catch her at the dye shop at least once a month where she’ll make sure her hair stays a lovely crimson.-Loves red, black, and glittery makeup.-Can and will fight anyone who makes fun of the egos even if they just give them a funny look.-Her anger is equivalent to or even greater than Darkiplier’s so messing with her or her brothers is pretty much a death sentence-She loves her brothers dearly, although she doesn’t like that Corroded makes fun of Blank and is usually the one who steps in when she sees the bullying going on.- Has a v sassy personality but inside she’s a real softie.-Especially when it comes to her family or anything that has to do with animals.-9/10 she’ll cry over the pet rescue/shelter commercials.-Usually asks Yahoo to look up beauty tutorials for her.-May have asked Dark for advice on eyeshadow at some point.-She’s the one who suggested that Mike give kids drug-free ice cream sandwiches even though she disapproves of his shop in general.

#clanask #crankgameplays #crankgameplays egos #crankegos #saintgameplays #corroded crank #corruptgameplays #blankgameplays #madmike #yahoogameplays #headcanons #bernice crankgameplays

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pichioto · 4 years ago

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lakelandseo · 4 years ago

Text

Accessible Machine Learning for SEOs — Whiteboard Friday

Posted by BritneyMuller

Machine learning — a branch of artificial intelligence that studies the automatic improvement of computer algorithms — might seem far outside the scope of your SEO work. MozCon speaker (and all-around SEO genius) Britney Muller is here with a special edition of Whiteboard Friday to tell you why that's not true, and to go through a few steps to get you started.

To see more on machine learning from Britney and our other MozCon 2020 speakers, check out this year's video bundle.

Get my MozCon 2020 video bundle

Click on the whiteboard image above to open a high resolution version in a new tab!

Video Transcription

Hey, Moz fans. Welcome to this special edition of Whiteboard Friday. Today we are taking a sneak peek at what I spoke about at MozCon 2020, where I made machine learning accessible to SEOs everywhere.

This is so, so exciting because it is readily at your fingertips today, and I'm going to show you exactly how to get started.

So to kick things off, I learned about this weird concept called brood parasites this summer, and it's fascinating. It's basically where one animal tricks another animal of the same species to raise its young.

It's fascinating, and the more I learned about it, the more I realized: oh my gosh, I'm sort of like a brood parasite when it comes to programming and machine learning! I latch on and find these great models that do all the work — all of the raising — and I put in my data and my ideas, and it does things for me.

So we are going to use this concept to our advantage. In fact, I have been able to teach my dad most of these models that, again, are readily available to you today within a tool called Colab. Let me just walk you through what that looks like.

Models to get you started

So to get started, if you want to start warming up right now, just start practicing clicking "Shift" and then click "Enter".

Just start practicing that right now. It's half the battle. You're about to be firing up some really cool models.

All right. What are some examples of that? What does that look like? So some of the models you can play with today are things like DeOldify, which is where you repair and colorize old photos. It's really, really fun.

Another one is a text generator. I created one with GTP-2 — super silly, it's this excuse generator. You can manipulate it and make it do different things for you.

There's also a really, really great forecasting model, where you basically put in a chunk of time series data and it predicts what the future might have in store. It's really, really powerful and fun.

You can summarize text, which is really valuable. Think about meta descriptions, all that good stuff.

You can also automate keyword research grouping, which I'll show you here in a second.

You can do really powerful internal link analysis, set up a notebook for that.

Perhaps one of the most powerful things is you can extract entities and categories as Google perceives them. It's one of my favorite APIs. It's through Google's NLP API. I pull it into a notebook, and you basically put the URLs you want to extract this information from and you can compare how your URL compares to competitors.

It's really, really valuable, fun stuff. So most importantly, you cannot break any of this. Do not be intimidated by any of the code whatsoever. Lots of seasoned developers don't know what's happening in some of those code blocks. It's okay.

Using Colab

We get to play in this environment. It's hosted in Google Drive, and so there's no fear of this breaking anything on your computer or with your data or anything. So just get ready to dive in with me. Please, it's going to be so much fun. Okay, so like I said, this is through a free tool called Colab. So you know how Google basically took Excel and made Google Sheets?

They did the same thing with what's known as Jupyter Notebooks. So these were locally on computers. It's one of the most popular notebook environments. But it requires some setup, and it can be somewhat clunky. It gets confused with different versions and yada, yada. Google put that into the cloud and is now calling it Colab. It's unbelievably powerful.

So, again, it's free. It's available to you right now if you want to open it up in a new tab. There is zero setup. Google also gives you access to free GPU and TPU computing, which is great. It has a 12-hour runtime.

Some cons is that you can hit limits. So I hit the limits, and now I'm paying $9.99 a month for the Pro version and I've had no problems.

Again, I'm not affiliated with this whatsoever. I'm just super passionate about it, and the fact that they offer you a free version is so exciting. I've already seen a lot of people get started in this. It's also something to note that it's probably not as secure or robust as Google's Enterprise solution. So if you're doing this for a large company or you're getting really serious about this, you should probably check out some other options. But if you're just kind of dabbling and want to explore and have fun, let's keep this party going.

Using pandas

All right. So again, this is basically a cloud hosted notebook environment. So one thing that I want to really focus on here, because I think it's the most valuable for SEOs, is this library known as "pandas".

Pandas is a data frame library, where you basically run one — or two — lines of code. You can choose your file from your local computer, so I usually just upload CSVs. This silly example is one that I really did run with Google Search Console data.

So you run this in a notebook. Again, I'm sharing this entire notebook with you today. So if you just go to it and you do this, it brings you through the cells. It's not as intimidating as it looks. So if you just click into that first cell, even if it's just that text cell, "Shift + Enter", it will bring you through the notebook.

So once you get past and once you fire up this chunk of code right here, upload your CSV. Then once you upload it, you are going to name your data frame.

So these are the only two cells you need to really change or do anything with if you want. Well, you need to.

So we are uploading your file, and then we are grabbing that file name. In this case, mine was just "gsc-example.csv". Again, once you upload it, you will see the name in that output here. So you just put that within this code block, run this, and then you can do some really easy lines of code to check to make sure that your data is in there.

So one of the first ones that most people do is "df". This is your data frame that you named with your file right here. So you just do "df.head()". This shows you the first five rows of your data frame. You can also do "df.tail()", and it shows you the last five rows of your data frame.

You can even put in a number in here to modify how many rows you want to explore. So maybe you do "df.head(30)", and then you see the first 30 rows. It's that easy just to get it in there and to see it. Now comes the really fun stuff, and this is just tip of the iceberg.

So you can run this really, really cool code cell here to create a filterable table. What's powerful about this, especially with your Google Search Console data, is you can easily extract and explore keywords that have high click-through rate and a low ranking in search. It's one of my favorite ways to explore keyword opportunities for clients, and it couldn't be easier.

So check that out. This is kind of the money part right here.

If you're doing keyword research, which can take a lot, right, you're trying to bucket keywords, you're trying to organize topics and all that good stuff, you can instantly create a new column with pandas with branded keyword terms.

So just to walk you through this, we're going "df["Branded"]". This is the name of the new column we're going to create. We have this query string "contains," and this is just regex, ("moz|rand|ose"). So any keywords that contain one of those words gets in the "Branded" column a "True".

So now that makes filtering and exploring that so much faster. You can even do this in ways where you can create an entirely different data frame table. So sometimes if you have lots and lots of data, you can use the other cell in that example. All of these examples will be in the notebook.

You can use that and export your keywords into buckets like that, and there's no stall time. Things don't freeze up like Excel. You can account for misspellings and all sorts of good stuff so, so easily with regular expressions. So super, super cool.

Conclusion

Again, this is just tip of the iceberg, my friends. I am most excited to sort of plant this seed within all of you so that you guys can come back and teach me what you've been able to accomplish. I think we have so much more to explore in this space. It is going to be so much fun. If you get a kick out of this and you want to continue exploring different models, different programs within Colab, I highly suggest you download the Colab Chrome extension.

It just makes opening up the notebook so much easier. You can save a copy to your drive and play with it all you want. It's so much fun. I hope this kind of sparked some inspiration in some of you, and I am so excited to hear what all of you think and create. I really appreciate you watching.

So thank you so much. I will see you all next time. Bye.

Video transcription by Speechpad.com

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epackingvietnam · 4 years ago

Text

Accessible Machine Learning for SEOs — Whiteboard Friday

Posted by BritneyMuller

To see more on machine learning from Britney and our other MozCon 2020 speakers, check out this year's video bundle.

Get my MozCon 2020 video bundle

Click on the whiteboard image above to open a high resolution version in a new tab!

Video Transcription

This is so, so exciting because it is readily at your fingertips today, and I'm going to show you exactly how to get started.

Models to get you started

So to get started, if you want to start warming up right now, just start practicing clicking "Shift" and then click "Enter".

Just start practicing that right now. It's half the battle. You're about to be firing up some really cool models.

Another one is a text generator. I created one with GTP-2 — super silly, it's this excuse generator. You can manipulate it and make it do different things for you.

You can summarize text, which is really valuable. Think about meta descriptions, all that good stuff.

You can also automate keyword research grouping, which I'll show you here in a second.

You can do really powerful internal link analysis, set up a notebook for that.

Using Colab

Some cons is that you can hit limits. So I hit the limits, and now I'm paying $9.99 a month for the Pro version and I've had no problems.

Using pandas

So once you get past and once you fire up this chunk of code right here, upload your CSV. Then once you upload it, you are going to name your data frame.

So these are the only two cells you need to really change or do anything with if you want. Well, you need to.

So check that out. This is kind of the money part right here.

Conclusion

So thank you so much. I will see you all next time. Bye.

Video transcription by Speechpad.com

Ready for more?

21 full-length videos from some of the brightest minds in digital marketing

Instant downloads and streaming to your computer, tablet, or mobile device

Downloadable slide decks for presentations

Get my MozCon 2020 video bundle

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