#..there is so much nuance and detail to Mary and her mannerism - all these little elements ranging from endearing to frightening -

[masterhandss]

How would you describe the original Katarina’s personality?

Hmm, that's kinda hard to answer. I feel like I've read so much FL!Katarina fanfics that i'd be combining canon and fanon interpretations of her haha.

(I'll be calling Hamefura Katarina "Bakarina" and Fortune Lover Katarina "Catarina" so I don't have to write FL!Katarina lmao)

There's not really a lot we know about the Fortune Lover version of the characters except for the surface level stuff. People have come up with their own explanations and extensions to those incarnations of the cast based on what little we know, creating interpretations based on our own suspicions and understanding of the life they could have lived if Bakarina had never bumped her head.

Bakarina described herself as a spoiled, prideful and selfish wealthy lady. She is far too spoiled, to the point where her selfishness causes problems for others. She is catty and brat. She was raised like a princess during her childhood, which made her haughty, but is nonetheless well-mannered is aware of her station (probably not as perfect as Mary's, but is still prim and proper). Since she is so used to the spotlight being on herself, she bullied Keith who was a threat to her position and because of the influence of her dejected mother, Miri. She doesn't care about anybody who isn't on her radar (people like Alan and Mary, who even her own fiance is indifferent towards) but will visibly act hostile to people she does not like (people who either not of noble birth or those who don't deserve to be, like Maria and Sophia).

Being the haughty daughter of a duke, she has high regards towards the importance of ranks in high society, making her hate Maria the commoner. She would belittle and put her down at every opportunity she can get, in order to make sure that Maria does not forget her status as a commoner even as she continues to stay in the academy and interact with their peers. Her feelings of disgust and betrayal over being on equal grounds with a commoner in the academy, as well as being surpassed by her magically and academically, leads Catarina to bully and harass her to an extreme degree to destroy her self-esteem and eventually make her leave the academy entirely.

In Fortune Lover 2, she returns as a villain who is intent on making Maria pay for her downfall. It shows that she isn't remorseful, and still thinks that she had done nothing wrong. At this point, Catarina goes from a selfish and spoiled brat duchess to a vengeful (and kinda murderous) villainess.

That's kinda all that I got from skimming Volume 1 or the light novels at the moment; I'm sure there are still some insight on what Catarina was like in the other books, besides what we know of her relationships with the other volumes.

While Verge of Doom in mind, we see that Catarina's overconfidence in herself can become a positive as well. She is so sure of herself that she declared anyone by her side is excellent and worthy to a degree, which had helped Sienna feel comfortable being in the academy. Katarina always has her chin up high, even though she is intellectually and magically weak, because her upbringing has made her feel like she is naturally leagues above everyone due to her status.

Catarina is just your typical surface-level villainess character, who is prideful, selfish and mean to other people who isn't in her circle. That's pretty much it to be honest.

Anything beyond this is pretty much laced with analysis and interpretation. One of the reasons why I really like reading FL-verse fics is the different ways they interpret the personalities and motivations of the characters with the little amount of history that we know of. Some of it are pure interpretation, while some of them are good extensions to the stuff we already knew.

Since Catarina is implied to not being good at reading the room, it'd be no surprise to imagine that her growing love for Prince Geordo is the outcome of not being able to read beyond his princely facade, thinking that he genuinely is returning the feelings rather than just being polite since that is expected of him. She lives in this perfect world where everything is made for her, and anyone who threatens it or disturbs it is worthy of her malice.

Some interpretations of Catarina say that she never bothered to try academically because of her status, since she's a prince's fiancee and a duke's daughter, she already has everything so there's nothing she would gain from a good grade. She had probably used her time socializing and growing her circle of followers rather than reading and studying. Since Catarina and Bakarina share the same soul, some would say that maybe she is airheaded and socially dense as well which is why she can't tell that other people dislike her (and even if she did know, depending on who they are she'd be so full of herself that she wouldn't care). Some have said that her physical abuse towards Keith as a child is more than just arrogance about wanting to keep the spotlight on herself and rejecting the idea of having a brother, but a reaction towards feeling threatened and (initially) scared rather than pure jealousy and anger. Some have even made her an accidental seductress who is unknowingly using her charm, wealth and arrogance to gather people to her side. Miridiana from what we know is an insecure person growing up due to her face, so some people have said that Catarina's arrogance is encouraged by Miri, if it helps her be more confident in herself as a duchess, and that in her eyes Catarina had grown into a perfect noblewoman.

Whenever fic writers try to draw lines between Catarina and Bakarina makes me happy actually :DD I love the idea that two have some similar quirks in the same way Aachan and Sophia does. It's so fun when writers make Catarina dumb in the way Bakarina is, while still maintaining her air of arrogance and poise.

It really makes me wish we could have seen more of Catarina in Verge of Doom. Like, have more flashbacks to Catarina's original personality, or have more scenarios where she is forced to act like her villainous self in order to get through a situation. At this point even the main story has more instances of this qwq. I mean it's really good that VOD gives a more remorseful Katarina, and it is interesting to see Catarina and Bakarina react to situations in the exact opposite ways, but one can dream, ya know?

Catarina is as simple of a villainess as one can get, but it's nice to see people try to give more history, detail and nuance to that villainy. It's fun to see it in fanfics, but let's not forget that she's a simple character in canon.

There's still so much I could say, but it's been so long since i've read a hamefura fanfiction so my stock knowledge is dried out lmao. I'm not a writer, so I can only really describe what I remember from reading Fortune Lover-verse fics. I really like them, even if they can be out of character and too different from the source material at times.

If anyone wants to add with more details about Catarina, or their own interpretations of her character, that would be awesome! :DD

Thank you for the ask :DD

[celiabowens]

2020 reads, summer tbr edition. The plan is to come back to this post as I read the books and probably dump my thoughts here, not sure yet lol

On Earth We’re Briefly Gorgeous: really liked it, although the narrative structure wasn’t quite my cup of tea. Still, Ocean Vuong’s prose is incredibly beautiful and raw. Overall, I’d still recommend it to everyone, even if non-linear narratives aren’t your thing, because Vuong’s prose is incredibly frank and yet stunning, and the way it captures memories and brief moments in time is absolutely incredible. The novel has so many layers, its complexity and nuance are truly outstanding. 

The Empire of Gold: really liked this one! It develops the political conflict that was built in the first two books very well. The build up is quite slow and I get why some people may have issues with the pace, but I really liked the different storylines and how they all came together. Also loved the romance so much. I wouldn’t have minded more space for female side characters though.

Provenance: this wasn’t a bad read, but not as good as I expected it to be either. It reads much like a comedy of manners mixed with interplanetary politics, which was fun, but not as in depth as I wished. The characters fell a bit flat (especially the secondary characters) and their relationships weren’t as developed as I had hoped. The world was very cool though, especially with how fleshed out it felt, even when it came to minimal details.

The Seven Husbands of Evelyn Hugo: i’m very conflicted about this. On one hand, I really did like it, the book is fast and compelling (and reads very much like a tv show). On the other hand, the ending felt like unnecessary drama and it ruined it just a little bit for me. Anyway, worth the hype.

Girl Serpent Thorn: sort of disappointing? It’s a nice YA fantasy, but the premise begged for a more complex and nuanced development. The characters weren’t particularly fleshed out and the plot was a bit too flimsy. The mythology and world building, mostly inspired by Persian folklore, were really interesting and the bisexual rep was nice as well. 

The Nickel Boys: I really don’t mesh well with Colson Whitehead’s writing style (it just sort of reads very essay-like? I’m more of a purple prose person and his books almost read like non-fiction in general), but I liked this much more than The Intuitionist. This is such a hopeless and cruel novel and it delivers one punch to the gut after another. The final twist was as brilliant as heartbreaking truly. Glad I read it, as hard as it was. 

Shorefall: I liked it as much as Foundryside, but I still think this series lacks the spark and the nuance The Divine Cities Trilogy had. It’s still a pretty complex fantasy series (and Bennett is a master of his craft for sure) and I liked the economical and political subplots so much, but the characters do very little for me. The f/f romance is super cute and the cast works well, but the characters aren’t as compelling on their own. Still, a solid read.

Realm of Ash: this was great! I really like how Tasha Suri creates so much tension between her characters (the slow burn, the yearning...) and the character development in general. I love how this book was mostly focused on the court, because the moral ambiguity and the intrigue really set it apart from its companion, in a good way. 

Salt Slow

Dune: DNFed this one at 40% (which is like, over 250 pages), because it was extremely boring and yet confusing. As much as I like modern science fiction, I think most of the classics may not be for me. 

The Once and Future King

Angels and Insects: DNFed this one, no regrets. I read Possession earlier this year and as tough as it was (it’s just really such a dense book), the painfully slow pace was worth it, because of how well crafted and complex it was. Angel and Insects contains two novella and the payoff wasn’t worth the boredom, so I just dropped it.

A Gentleman in Moscow: this was literally perfect until the ending. I just...found it overly bizarre and forced. The rest of the novel is, however, 100% worth the hype. It’s compelling and nuanced and such a good character study. Really loved the prose too.

The Impossible Girl: the premise was better than its execution, I guess. I feel like my biggest problem with this one was how flat the characters felt to me and how the plot was a little messy. The premise was great (crossdressing girl with two hearts working as a resurrectionist was interesting to say the least), and I can’t say I didn’t enjoy the novel overall, because I did, just not as much as I thought. 

Notes on a Nervous Planet (if all the academic reading I need to do for thesis doesn’t end me first)

I actually don’t do too well with structured TBRs and I might read these in a month truthfully, so I don’t know how this experiment will go, but I guess I’ll see.

Stuff I’ve read out of the TBR: The Kindgom of Back by Marie Lu (I loved this one, would totally recommend checking it out), The Gameshouse by Claire North (the first novella is good, the rest was painful to read tbh), The Glass Hotel by Emily St. John Mandel (well written, but I really just did not care at all for it).

[charliejrogers]

Birds of Prey (Or, Men Suck: An Action Movie!)

Before 2019’s Captain Marvel or 2017’s Wonder Woman had the opportunity to be smash successes, Margot Robbie’s turn as Harley Quinn in Suicide Squad, a character that was equal parts bad-assery, sadism, and unabashed sexuality, was the closest the comic book movie world had to a genuine female star. And, yes, that’s a direct knock on ScarJo’s Black Widow. Given the character’s popularity, Robbie’s interest in playing the character, the Me Too movement, and the subsequent success of Wonder Woman and Captain Marvel, a Harley Quinn movie was somewhat inevitable. The marketing for the film made it quite clear that Quinn’s new movie, Birds of Prey, aimed to rise far above the ashes of its predecessor. The previews advertised Quinn literally killing off the Joker (and symbolically cutting ties with one of the most complained-about aspects of Suicide Squad) by blowing up an ACE Chemicals building with Joker presumably inside. It was the location in the previous film where the Quinn and Joker’s relationship was born. This seemed like a bold, exciting jumping-off point for the film. Combined with its striking art design and lengthy sub-title (Birds of Prey and the Fantabulous Emancipation of One Harley Quinn) the movie had me excited to watch a spirited indictment of the patriarchy under the guise of a comic book movie. That’s mostly what I got.

The movie indeed starts with an effectively brief animation detailing Harley’s life up to that point: haunted by her abandonment by her father and raised by harsh nuns, Harley’s need for male approval and hate of the establishment were finally realized when she met the Joker, a man for whom she cast aside her MD/PhD in psychology for a life of crime. But she gets tired of doing all the work and planning for Mr. J., but receiving none of the credit. It’s here you’d expect some big fight between Joker and Harley culminating in the explosion from the trailer. But the trailer was deceiving. We don’t see the fight. We just see Quinn’s reaction to being dumped by the Joker in a manner similar to how break-ups are portrayed in thousands of other pieces of fiction: crying hysterically, getting belligerently drunk, getting a pet, and denying that the break-up even happened. All this onscreen activity is accompanied by constant narration from Quinn who, instead of telling the truth about her pain and insecurities, lies and brags about her strength and maturity in dealing with the situation. When she ultimately decides to blow up ACE Chemicals, it is not an attempt to fight back against her abuser, but is instead her response to hearing other women talk shit about how she will likely go running back to the Joker. Blowing up the building doesn’t kill Joker (he’s not even present); it was just an immature, symbolic gesture to let the Joker know that she wasn’t coming back to him (like he would even care).

This rather weak portrayal of Quinn stands in stark contrast to the character as portrayed in the pilot of the recent animated show Harley Quinn. Interestingly, the show has Harley, who has recently been left for dead by the Joker, empower herself to leave the Joker. Yet, the portrayal at the start of Birds of Prey is intentional. It paves the way for eventual growth. It wouldn’t be much of a movie if she achieved her emancipation in the first five minutes. Plus, it perfectly falls in line with the relationship and characters established in Suicide Squad. There, Quinn and Joker were a couple madly in love, always desperately trying to get back to one another. Still, by shying away from the truth and horrors of the abuse Quinn suffered from the Joker and instead choosing to couch her abuse as “not getting credit/appreciation,” the movie weakens her power, strength, and growth in character. Her emancipation becomes less an empowered victory over abuse and misogyny and more just escaping the shadow of her arrogant boyfriend. This is unfortunate as symbolically it is satisfying that even Quinn’s first step towards independence, blowing up the ACE chemical building, is met with punishment and the assumption by male society that she can no longer defend herself. Seemingly every other bad guy in Gotham City knew to interpret the explosion exactly as Harley intended, and now they all seek vengeance for Miss Quinn’s many misdeeds, now that she lacks the protection of Mr. J.

The actual plot for the movie focuses on its villain, Ramon “Black Mask” Sionis, the epitome of white male privilege but without the confidence, a wealthy billionaire man-child so insecure he lashes out violently in response to the smallest insult. Sionis is trying to acquire the film’s MacGuffin, a diamond, on the exact same day all of Gotham’s underbelly, including Sionis, is out for Quinn’s head. The diamond is inadvertently pickpocketed by Cassandra Cain, a teenaged, female ne’er-do-well (Ella Jay Basco) who, like Quinn, is the victim of abuse and abandonment and has now turned to thievery to get by. For reasons I won’t spoil, Cassandra is unable to part ways with the diamond, so the hunt for the diamond becomes the hunt for Cassandra. It’s a hunt that involves multiple female protagonists. There’s Detective Montoya (Rosie Perez), a veteran detective trying to make a criminal case against Sionis. There’s Black Canary (Jurnee Smollett-Bell), a singer in Sionis’s nightclub whom he forces to be his personal driver and errand-girl. And then there’s the Huntress (Mary Elizabeth Winstead), a cross-bow-wielding bad-ass who actually isn’t after Sionis at all but is just kinda there on her own, separate revenge scheme. And, of course, Quinn inevitably gets involved in the hunt as well.

But for as much as the plot is about acquiring the diamond and escaping Sionis and his goons, it really is a film about female empowerment. The patriarchy, its inherent misogyny and perpetuation of rape culture, is the true villain. And emancipation from the grips of patriarchy is ultimately desired by all its female protagonists, not just Quinn. Detective Montoya is constantly passed up for promotions at work for decades even though she’s the brain by many successful operations. Black Canary, a Black woman, has an arc that combines misogyny with racism as she is forced into near slavery by Sionis (a white male who refers to her as “his little bird” and, not so subtly, “owns” an extensive collection of shrunken African heads). Her arc is my favorite in the film. And then there’s Huntress who… well, she’s just doing her own revenge thing, man. Like she’s killing dudes and stuff, but it’s hard to really link her with the deep anti-patriarchy themes the other three protagonists have. But where the movie really elevates itself beyond the sort of surface-level “girl power!” (that the Huntress unfortunately sorta represents) is in its willingness to be honest and nuanced about the brutality of sexual assault, even in the small degree it does address it.

Twice, Quinn finds herself incapacitated while being directly threatened by a man. The first occurs after her post-break-up binge-drinking night out where on the verge on consciousness, she is being caressed and fondled by a man in an alley and nearly kidnapped (and presumably raped) by two men. In the second instance, she’s hit with a paralytic agent. Her assailant crouches down next to her, puts her arm around his neck. “You’re still conscious,” he says to himself, as if reassuring himself like a man about to rape a drunk girl on the drink of consciousness. It’s rather disturbing and powerful to see our protagonist who is, in every sense of the phrase, a bad-ass be just as susceptible to be raped and taken advantage of as any other woman in society. No one is safe, and she’s not alone. There’s another rather difficult scene where the movie’s villain, Ramon Sionis, forces an innocent female patron at his night club, under the threat of death, to strip and dance on top of a table in front of the whole club. These are powerful and scary scenes that generally aren’t a part of superhero movies. No doubt, the success and nuance of the scenes is due to the fact that the movie is directed by a woman, Cathy Yan, written by a woman, Christina Hodson, and produced mainly by women (including the star Margot Robbie herself). If allowed to explore these issues more deeply, it would have been a fantastic film.

Still, this movie is not intended to be a deep, serious dive against real issues women face; I recognize its an action-focused comic book movie. And to that degree, the movie is mostly a success. It’s a fun movie with clever, visually-stunning action sequences. I was floored by its use of color (of purples, reds, and blues particularly) throughout all the fight scenes. There’s an extremely satisfying scene where Quinn infiltrates a police station with a gun that shoots out what looks like bean bags that release colorful dust/confetti upon impact. And the final battle scene in an abandoned boardwalk’s funhouse featured one of the most creative set pieces for an action movie this side of Temple of Doom, replete of trampolines, mirrors, and gripping melee combat (with mallets, bats, and kicks to the groin, instead of the often-more boring-shoot-outs.)

I really cannot say enough good things about the visual style of the film or its tightly choreographed fight scenes. Less good things can be said about scenes that do no feature fighting/action. McGregor as Sionis is fine, but Sionis is an uninteresting villain, and his over-the-top childish nature is boring to watch. The movie would have been better served by a villain like Jason Schwartzman’s Gideon from Scott Pilgrim vs the World, a well-respected, successful, confident, misogynistic tool, rather than the insecure mess seen here. Also, Ella Jay Basco as the teenaged pickpocket Cassandra is not a great actress and there was little chemistry between her and Robbie. This is unfortunate since the movie aims to cast Harley as Cassandra’s new foster-mother to highlight Quinn’s growth and this sequence takes up a good chunk of the middle of the film. I did like how the film explored the idea that Harley Quinn, though a “super villain,” is a normal person who needs to get groceries like the rest of us. Scenes like these helped to make Quinn more sympathetic but were largely hampered by bad dialogue.

Furthermore, are we just going to ignore that Harley handed Cassandra a bomb with a lit fuse, giving Cassandra no choice but to throw the bomb out a car window thereby killing one of their assailants?! Cassandra cannot be more than 15 years old, but the movie does nothing to explore what this obviously traumatic situation does to Cassandra. I’ll buy the film’s excuse that she has a penchant for pickpocketing as a consequence of her social circumstances… but you can’t tell me that she would have no second thoughts/trauma about killing another human being! Sorry, that’s the pediatrician in me getting out.

So yeah, I liked the movie. It’s not great, but it ain’t bad. Its weak dialogue and weak villain are made up for by the film’s great visuals and its absolute commitment to doing right by its themes, even approaching serious issues with nuance and grace, something that would never have happened if a bunch of dudes crafted this picture. And even if the first hour isn’t great, most of my complaints washed away in the last half hour when all the female protagonists finally join together and that awesome funhouse battle takes place. Further, it is satisfying to see that Harley Quinn really does change throughout the film. In defeating Sionis, she is able to finally free herself from the Joker, but also from all the men who assumed she was nothing more than the Joker’s bitch. The movie doesn’t leave much room for a sequel which in itself is refreshing. It tells a complete tale. Still, I’d happily seek to watch more of these birds of prey having been let out of their cages, free to take on more of patriarchy.

 **/ (Two and a half stars out of four)

[swamp-world]

When I’m reading reviews of books, sometimes I see things that really make me question quite a bit about what people are looking for when they read these books. A lot of this is in relation to women characters and how they’re portrayed, and the fact that it seems like there’s no right way to portray them at all without people getting upset--if a woman is a typical “strong female character” then she’s a trope and unrealistic; if a woman doesn’t fight and needs to be rescued then she’s a poor caricature of women and offensive; a woman cannot be decisive and in power one minute and then cowed in a different scenario right after--but there’s so much to the writing overall.

[minor spoilers i guess for TYE, maybe Song of the Lioness and Nevernight?] 

First of all, I see a lot of people who lack critical understanding and comprehension, or who aren’t willing to put in the effort for it. I’m going to use a lot of examples from YA literature for this, because that’s mostly what I’m reading reviews for, because that’s what I largely enjoy reading. 

The other day I was reading some reviews for The Young Elites by Marie Lu, after rereading it. I found that on the second read, as per usual, it didn’t hit in the same way; that’s not a bad thing, just to say that it didn’t have the same first-read wonder to it. But I still enjoyed it very much. Now, this one particular reviewer spent quite a while complaining about Adelina, and how she isn’t good, etc etc etc. Adelina goes on a villain arc. She does the wrong thing, she hurts people, she kills people when she shouldn’t and has no reason to. She is traumatized and doesn’t deal with that in a healthy or acceptable manner, instead taking it out on everyone around her. The entire point of her character is that she is trying to take control, but that her power thrives on fear and fury. She is in the wrong, she is told that she’s in the wrong, and then she goes and does awful things. That’s literally the point of the book. Apparently someone didn’t get that, because they spent quite a while complaining about all of this. So that was more of a short rant on my end. 

Let’s go to some specifics: worldbuilding and characterization and as a footnote, plots.

I love worldbuilding. For me, physically creating new worlds to write in is one of my favourite things to do, and reading books where the author has put in effort is just as good. For peak worldbuilding, let’s look at a classic: Tolkien. He spent his life building up the world of Middle Earth. As the joke goes, he tells the story of every single tree. And that’s his style. Personally I haven’t read any of his books, and I know I’ll get murdered for saying that (I will I promise!!!!) but the worldbuilding is absolutely incredible, sometimes to the verge of Too Much, it seems. A modern level and a step down is Jay Kristoff, specifically the Nevernight Chronicles. I have yet to finish the third book, but the series is really amazing and I absolutely recommend it. There are a lot of people who dislike his writing style, which is understandable; I personally adore it. Kristoff does a lot of worldbuilding as well. He has little tidbits of history for each country and culture, both relevant and irrelevant; he makes the place feel real. For me, I didn’t find that this was too much, largely because it’s my preference. For other people, it was, and that’s also understandable: not all of it was relevant to the story or to what the audience needed to know. Another step down from there in terms of worldbuilding was The Young Elites. The world is developed enough that you know what’s going on, and you are given the information that you need to know. All of the countries involved seem to have the same or a similar religious system, though independent cultures and distinguishing features. You are told what is relevant to the story, and the worldbuilding isn’t lacking, but it isn’t going out of its way to the same extent that Tolkien and Kristoff do. And that’s not a bad thing! For some pieces, the worldbuilding is amazing, and that’s what sells it. For others, the worldbuilding is what it needs to be, because it doesn’t need to have the rest of it, and it’s just fine on its own. 

However, it has to be balanced. I’m going to rip into basically every main-shelf author that you see at the front of the bookstore here. Wilbur Smith, John Grisham, any of these names--are they good at character development? The answer is, usually, no. No, their characters are all two dimensional, copy-pasted caricatures of one another. The abandoned brother, the incredible casanova, the strong woman, the wife, the lawyer. The characters are not spectacular. And you know what? That’s ok! Because those ones are about plot and setting, usually. John Grisham doesn’t write about characters, he writes about high stakes legal cases, and all of the fallout from them. Wilbur Smith writes about families, using them as a vehicle to write about African history, but the focus is on the events and not the characters. And that’s ok!! (I have other problems with these authors but for the point of the argument, let’s just go with it.) You don’t need to have amazing characters always if you have a good plot, and if the plot is the intention. 

Sometimes you get a weird balance of these three elements, which I’m marking as what I’d consider the most important for me, for what I read. (The last paragraph is mostly exempt from worldbuilding because most of what’s the front shelf stuff isn’t SFF and doesn’t need it.) Sometimes you get authors like Tochi Onyebuchi, who, love him to bits, is not the best at plot or characterization in comparison to a lot of other authors. But do you know what!!!!! That is ok!!!!! He writes incredible worlds, with the focus being those worlds. The plot occurs because of the worlds, instead of the other way around. The characters are vehicles to move the plot. And that isn’t necessarily a bad thing! Just like if it were the other way around, with an intriguing plot and somewhat interesting characters but lacking worldbuilding, or amazing characters who are interesting and bring it to life, despite having a mediocre plot or worldbuildling.

What I’m trying to get at is that it feels like, regularly, people who are reviewing books want everything. If a book doesn’t have amazing characters and plot and worldbuilding, if you can see the plot twists coming, if you can’t relate to a cardboard character, if you don’t know everything about the world, then it’s a regular writeoff. I saw a lot of people tearing into Song of the Lioness by Tamora Pierce, because it’s written in a style more for children, or new teens; because the pacing is fast; because there isn’t a lot of detail. But it doesn’t have to be written at a higher reading level; it doesn’t have to be detailed or have immaculate pacing, especially when the first book is just exposition. 

Reviews are a good thing, I wholeheartedly believe that. They’re a way to express what you feel about a book, to give feedback and criticism. It encourages critical thinking, and for me as a writer, helps me to find what I want in a piece that I’m both reading and writing. But at the same time, many people it seems lack the understanding that nuance exists, and that different pieces can have different styles and different focuses, and that doesn’t make it bad in and of itself. 

[hellzyeahwebwielingessays]

Superior is INDEFENCIBLE Part 2: Odds and Ends

Part 1

As a little follow up to this post I want to wrap up some defences I have encountered for both Superior #2 and the Superior storyline in general.

To start with we have more hypocrisy from the man I once admired as he tried to defend his position on Superior.

He was challenged on his primary argument that Peter and MJ’s separation justified her obliviousness now that they are back together; for further details see the above linked post.

In response to this challenge he said:

“I think there is more to my argument then "They've lived apart for a year" and her relationship with him during that time doesn't have to hold relevance to their relationship after being apart.”

Like…this guy was for fucking real.

OF COURSE their relationship back then is going to hold relevance to their relationship after being apart.

Obviously with the benefit of hindsight Nick Spencer’s run proves this to be the case. And you can refer back to my prior post where I dive deeper into the topic.

However, in that post I was talking about the specific nuances of Peter and MJ’s relationship.

What’s mind boggling is that in the above quote he’s making an even bigger reach. Jesus Christ OF COURSE their past relationship is going to hold relevance for their then-current one.

That’s how relationships work!

FFS, romantic or otherwise everyone’s relationship with everyon else is shaped by the past. This is like arguing Peter hating Norman for killing Gwen Stacy doesn’t have to be relevant to their relationship after his return to the Clone Saga.

I mean shit dude, Peter’s high school romance with Betty Brant was relevant to their romance after he graduated college!

This is how all types of relationships work. You don’t just jump in after awhile, start fresh and then nothing from the past has any bearing on the present. Even in the most positive of scenarios the fact that you are getting together again  would still be shaped by the fact that you liked each other in the first place.

And for the life experiences those two shared that’d go a thousand fold.

Now let’s move on to some over miscellaneous comments sent to me a  looooooooooooong time ago.

I’ve had this stuff in my drafts for years! 

For the sake of catharsis I’ve decided to clear it out. It revolves around Superior Spider-Man and the comments I’m responding to were made before the original volume ended in 2014.

“Rob Wrecks wrote:Why would Aunt May even react to it? She doesn't even know the identity of Spidey now.”

In Civil War she was able to tell that the Chameleon, a MASTER of disguise who was being more subtle than Otto was, was not her nephew.

Whilst she might not know he is Spider-Man she knows her nephew so she should react and become questionable regarding his change in demeanor and behavior. What’s the old saying ‘A mother always knows’.

“As for MJ, they aren't even married anymore either. Sure she remembers who is under the mask. But I doubt she's gonna bring trouble on herself for prying.”

I address a lot of this in this  post.

Basically, not being married anymore has nothing to do with it. This woman lived with this man for years (five to be precise) and had a very close relationship with him which involved countless tragedies and traumas. That doesn’t just go away. This is to say nothing of the fact that she has known this man for about 10 years and has been his friend and girlfriend during that time. In fact in Stern’s run when she knew who he was but didn’t let him know, she was depicted as knowing him better than anyone and was able to read him as a book. This was back when they weren’t as close as they are now, hadn’t known each other for as long and she didn’t know him as intimately as she would later come to down the road. In ASM #290 Peter himself says MJ knows him as well as he knows himself and this was before the marriage.

Even in Slott’s run this depiction of Mary Jane knowing Peter better than anyone else was highlighted in various stories like Spider Island, a time travel arc, Alpha, and a Lizard arc at HORIZON labs. 

In JMS’ run Peter and Mary Jane were shown to be somewhat in synch even though they were separated at the time and had been for a long while going back. This was showcased in ASM V2 #50 and they had been effectively separated with minimal interaction as far back as ASM V2 #13; arguably even issue #1.

And yet she understood him and knew him very well, falling back into synch with him when they reconciled. Yes there was some awkwardness and them getting to know each other again but it was not on the same level of Otto guzzling champagne, creating spider bots, talking in a manner which was unlike the way he’s ever spoken before and MJ just wondering passingly then dismissing it. This woman has lived through the Chamelon, robot parents and clones and lives in a world where friggin Skrulls have invaded.

This out of character behaviour should send off alarm bells. She DOES clock something is off in Superior #10 but only when he says a phrase she’s never heard him say before. He was doing shit MUCH more out of character before then and she was dismissing it.

Later she was STILL dismissing the notion that Peter wasn’t himself as merely crazy on her part.

Again this woman knows Peter can be/has been cloned  repeatedly. This woman even for awhile believed Peter himself was a clone so she knows even memories can be replicated. But Peter is acting so obviously NOT himself that it’s practically SCREAMING at her that she should get this. In fact Peter’s ghost point this out which is Slott lampshading the situation. That doens’t make it good writing that’s just pointing out how bad your story is.

“Hasn't she (I'm guessing he's referring to Aunt May?) been focused lately on her new marriage though? I don't read enough of Spidey these days so I'm only going with bits and pieces I've read about here and there.”

What does being married recently or focusing upon it have to do with anything?

In Civil War she was focused upon not dying because Peter’s ID reveal had upended her life.

If you are someone’s MOTHER and have raised them all their life you will absolutely  be able to tell when something is wrong, when they are in fact not the real deal.

“As for MJ, who would she go too? Not like anyone would likely believe her unless she had a telepath scan her mind.”

Who would she go to? I dunno maybe the fucking Avengers or Fantastic Four who are Peter’s friends and team mates. Or maybe not go that far why not go to Black Cat, Human Torch or Daredevil . These are all people whom she knows (at least vaguely in regards to Daredevil) personally and have access to technology that can prove things one way or another.

Even if you argue that it’s not fair bringing in the wider Marvel Universe, Black Cat, Carlie, HORIZON labs, the Bugle staff and Scarlet Spider are all Spider-Man franchise characters.

“Now there could be a possibility she's making a list of his behavior and the like and is just waiting for the right time to say something when she knows she's less likely to die from it.

Maybe Slott's just got something going that'll eventually be revealed? Who knows.”

Oh boy, that didn’t stand the test of time did it?

This is just shitty analysis on principle. It hinges upon blind faith and writing stuff in your head about what characters are doing behind the scenes.

There was NEVER an indication MJ was doing anything like that and her actions actually contradicted event he idea of her doing any of that stuff.

The net responses are to the statement that Doc Ock was a gentleman who would treat women with respect.

“Keyword there, 'was' a gentlemen. I can imagine after years of defeats at the hands of Spidey, certain habits would change and he wouldn't care anymore.

It could have just been a subtle change that no one really noticed. He did try and end the world before #700 if I recall right.”

You need to SHOW those habits changing. The last major Doctor Octopus story before BND was in JMS’s run when he was very much a gentleman. You can’t just say his illness and defeats suddenly transformed him into a would be rapist. It’s utterly out of character for him. It’d be like bringing back Ben Reilly and making him a mass murderer. WHY is he a mass murderer.

(Fun fact. The stuff I bolded about Ben Reilly was something I wrote at the time. I kept it in because of how sadly ironic it wound up being…fuck Clone Conspiracy seriously)

Ending the world before #700 is one thing IN Doc Ock’s character. He is egotistical and wants acknowledgement of his genius.

Superior depicted him going against a character trait he’s always had. In his origin story, when he was ‘courting’ Aunt May, when he was involved with Stunner and Lady Octopus and the like he has always been show to have a respect for women and not had to resort to cheap ploys to woo them.

In Superior he was trading off of MJ’s relationship with Peter and Peter’s memories to basically abuse this woman. That is beneath Doctor Octopus. He is an intellectual a man for whom such actions are debase, the realm of the common thug whilst he is much more he is DOCTOR OCTOPUS.

BTW in Web of Death it was established that Doc Ock probably would not target MJ or Peter’s family even though he knew Peter’s identity.

So for him to suddenly switch to ‘I’m gonna fuck his girlfriend to get one over on him” is again utterly out of character.

‘Web of Death’ was co-written by Tom DeFalco btw, who established Otto’s origin. Thus the argument is flying in the face of someone who helped define the character with no explanation at all.

Slott had done this with other characters like Ashley Kafka.Suddenly the most naively compassionate woman in the world who believed she could redeem CARNAGE is saying this lesser serial killer is a complete monster. That is piss poor writing.

Even if Slott WERE to establish and show how Ock went from one extreme to the other it doesn’t make it a good idea. Doc Ock would be rapist is a lot less interesting than Doc Ock the lone super villain who is part gentleman and part humanitarian with a respect for women. If this was Norman Osborn in Peter’s body, or Electro, or Shocker I’d believe these actions.

The topic then changed to Carlie Cooper’s depiction in Superior as a goddam idiot who isn’t even telling MJ Peter might  be evil. “Red Hood wrote: Carlie and Wraith followed Ock’s paper trail because she knows for fact that peter parker doesnt have the money to fund his own private army, the reason she hasnt said anything is because it's not such a good idea to go pointing fingers without absolute truth, remember eddie brock and how he was so sure about the sin eater?”

Carlie’s investigation was going incredibly sloooooooooooooooooowly. Not only was it dull reading, but it made her completely unsympathetic. Why not warn Mary Jane by saying “Look before he died Doc Ock told me he and Spider-Man had swapped bodies. I’m not saying Peter IS Doc Ock but just....be careful MJ”.

Or why not inform the Avengers or Fantastic Four about this. Sure the Avengers gave him a physical but they wouldn’t know what to look for. And why is Carlie Cooper all of a sudden saying “Wait I KNOW Peter doesn’t have this kind of cash so this is a big clue that he isn’t himself.” When her first big clue should have been that time Spider-Man SHOT SOMEONE IN THE FACE!

“also peter and mj arent married anymore.”

See above.

You don’t just suddenly fall out of knowing someone if you’ve been THAT close to them and known them for that long just because suddenly you are not married anymore. She has deduced subtle differences in the Chameleon and clones before this but Ock is NOT being subtle whatsoever. He isn’t even talking the same way he normally does. And Mister Red Hood even says so himself, Carlie can tell right way. His co-workers whom he’s known for LESS THAN A YEAR can tell something is up. But the woman who’s been closer to him than ANYONE in his life, she can’t tell. That is bullshit of the highest order.

“1. mj and peter arent married anymore, idk if they were married in identity crisis but remember how after the deal with mephisto they were separated for x amount of years before she even came back to new york, i can see her not being able to tell peter is acting different at that point. aunt may and the avengers though don't get a pass especially when carlie who knew him the least could tell right away.”

See above.

You don’t just suddenly fall out of knowing someone if you’ve been THAT close to them and known them for that long just because suddenly you are not married anymore. She has deduced subtle differences in the Chameleon and clones before this but Ock is NOT being subtle whatsoever. He isn’t even talking the same way he normally does. And Mister Red Hood even says so himself, Carlie can tell right way. His co-workers whom he’s known for LESS THAN A YEAR can tell something is up. But the woman who’s been closer to him than ANYONE in his life, she can’t tell. That is bullshit of the highest order.

When you separate from someone you’ve been that close to those feelings don’t just disappear. This is especially true of people who’ve been through immensely traumatic events together. Soldiers often find that only fellow soldiers, specifically ones who were with them in combat, can truly understand what they went through and how they felt. It creates an emotional/mental bond. Same thing here. Peter and Mary Jane went through Venom, Kraven’s Last Hunt, the death of Harry, Gwen, aunt May, Ben Reilly, the clone saga as a whole, Civil War, Peter’s OWN death, Maximum Carnage and so on. They’d have that kind of connection I was speaking about, you don’t just forget it to the point where you let MASSIVE differences in behaviour slide, especially massive differences in behaviour which are different to the way he was acting LAST WEEK!

“3. Also i don't think his  [Doc Ock’s] actions are entirely out of character, i mean he was dead, then revived, beat down for several years into a dying body. given time to think about all the things you would do if given another chance i dont think its out of the question for doc to say "great, second chance at life with a movie starhottie gf". also if you'll threaten the city, then the world, then mind swap with someone i dont think having sex is that big a stretch.”

See my comments above why this IS out of character for Doc Ock. Again this isn’t just him wanting to get laid this is him potentially date raping an innocent woman. You need to SHOW the progression of that change

And rape in comic book fiction is understood to be worse  from the reader’s POV than the various Saturday Morning Cartoon style crimes he’s pulled.

The next comment was in response to the public’s indifference towards Spider-Man shooting Massacre in the face! “7. As far as no one caring about massacre, didn't he break out a few times and inflict his namesake? no one is going to care that a killer like that gets shot, humans aren't dignified at all. i can see aunt may saying something but no one else is going to be like "oh great that killer is back in jail, too bad all criminals break out" no they're going to be like "finally someone put down this thug, maybe my life or someone i care about will be spared from him at least in the future" and maybe it was caught on security cameras or phones but maybe they deleted it, i mean spider-man just shot a dude in the face and if he wanted there would be nothing anyone could do to stop him from putting the hurt on someone else”

This is just rubbish.

No one is going to care? For God’s sake the police in real life get reprimanded for using unnecessary force.

The law is the law you CANNOT publically execute an unarmed man. And my point was no one, not even Mary Jane or Jonah, were reacting to this mind-blowingly out of character action on the part of Spider-Man. Maybe they do not care that Massacre was killed but they should be wondering “Jesus that’s not like Spider-Man at all”. This was Spider-Man becoming absolutely EVERYTHING Jameson ever falsely accused him of and no one reacted. And I am sorry but the attitude of ‘human’s aren’t dignified so they’d react like THIS” is extremely broad and generalised. This would be a major talking point and a major issue. This is EXACTLY what the entire ‘Civil War’ debacle was about. Super heroes running unchecked doing as they pleased. It’s been what, a year tops Marvel time since Civil War? If that stuff was deleted YOU NEED TO SHOW IT. The cover story is that EVERYONE in that massive crowd covered for him. That is in no way shape or form how humans actually act. And who would there be to stop like a teenager or a kid or a lone person in the crowd from tweeting “OMG Spider-Man just shot this dude” or uploading a video or picture. They were CHEERING him on they wouldn’t be afraid of him being reprimanded. Once something like that hit the internet it’d spread like wildfire, it wouldn’t be something that if immediately taken down would die away, especially when THE NEWS was stating Spider-Man had ‘neutralised Massacre’ and then Massacre shows up dead, WTF would the public THINK happened?

“Aaron Alexander Luthor wrote: Superior is an excellent title, but I feel you approached it having already made up your mind. Doc Ock NEVER attempted date rape, and I don't know where you get that from”

Boy, I wonder where I got the idea of Otto trying to rape MJ from? What an obviously ‘excellent’ title.

Trying to sleep with Mary Jane whilst tricking her into thinking he is Peter Parker then that is categorically trying to date rape her. He didn’t go through with it because he discovered he could just wank off to her memories (I can’t believe I wrote that) but that is exactly what he was trying to do. Maybe to HIM he didn’t think of it as rape but yeah that’s exactly what it was.

“He ripped off his own shirt, not hers.”

I honestly have no idea what he’s talking about here btw.

“Mary Jane had/has mentioned several times that there is something wrong with him and that she thinks there is something strange going on, he also hasn't spoken to her in weeks in the time frame of the comic.”

Yes MJ has noticed passingly things are wrong but then he feeds her a line and she buys it or otherwise she dismisses it herself. This in monumentally out of character for her given her history and makes her incredibly stupid, which is the ONLY way this title could have worked out. Again, she lives in a world of Skrulls, clones, LMDs and shape shifters one of which is literally an enemy of Peter’s and has tried impersonating him multiple times (targeting her specifically twice). But she either doesn’t clock anything is wrong or doesn’t really react when she does. And he HAD spoken to her within weeks by the time or Superior #2.

“Same goes for Aunt May, he visited her the first few weeks as Parker, and hasnt spoken to her since. He is basically ignoring the people in Peter's life, and they have taken notice.”

See my response about Aunt May not knowing. Again, this woman RAISED him and she could tell when the master of disguise who was being a lot more subtle about impersonating Peter was not her son/nephew.

Also he wasn’t exactly ignoring  the HORIZON labs staff was he?

“When he killed Massacre, some of the civilians were shocked and appalled, but when the police investigated all the officers on the scene lied for Spidey, because they think he did the right thing. That is why the only officers still interested are Carlie Cooper who does know, and is ACTIVELY trying to prove it isnt Peter, and Captain Watanabe aka The Wraith”

My point about NO ONE taking photos, tweeting, facebooking or whatever still stands as does the security cameras thing and the fact that Massacre was TRYING TO GET PUBLICITY. Again with Carlie why is she not warning SOMEBODY at this point. It isn’t like they wouldn’t believe her after Massacre. It isn’t like Spider-Man isn’t acting weird. It isn’t like body swapping is a legit THING in the Marvel universe. For God’s sake this happened to Captain America!

Kaine, the CLONE of Peter Parker with identical memories and everything. In the Sibling Rivaly crossover between Scarlet Spider and Superior Team-Up even HE couldn’t tell that Peter. Was an imposter This guy doesn’t just know Peter well, he IS Peter. And Otto was ranting none too subtley about how Kaine has bad blood with HIM. He doesn’t say he’s Doc Ock but he’s conveying unsubtly to Kaine that he is not Peter Parker and he is not TALKING like Peter Parker either. When his CLONE is still operating under the delusion that he is Peter Parker that’s put it beyond doubt this was ridiculously contrived.

“BTW, Carlie and MJ have talked about the suspicious way Pete has been acting, Carlie just hasnt told MJ directly.”

WHY didn’t Carlie tell MJ! And WHY were she and Peter noticing Peter’s different actions yet being totally blasé about them.

FFS in ‘Kraven’s Last Hunt’ MJ and Peter had been married for just 2 weeks and in that time she was able to deduce from his actions that the guy in the Spider-Man suit was NOT Peter. In the Mark of Kaine an identical clone of Peter approaches her and she is ultimately able to tell (twice) that he is not her husband. And she did this whilst pregnant and stressed out from a life or death situation to say nothing of the fact that Aunt May had recently died which would be weighing on her mind. Yet in Superior her mind was clearer and she was still buying this was Peter. This is enormously bad out of character writing for her

“As for the Avengers scans, it wasnt that no one could read them, its that they all came back NORMAL.”

No, the scans DID NOT come back normal at all. Doc Ock looked at the scans and could TELL something was not normal because he saw ghost Peter was in his mind. Yeah there was a tiny inconsistency in the brain waves but why the heck weren’t there people on the Avengers team that day to take note of stuff like that. Cap, Wolverine, Black Widow and Thor are obviously NOT going to be able to properly read this scientific equipment like Iron Man or Hank Pym or the Beast. ANY of those guys would’ve been able to tell but no only the Avengers who categorically would not be able to properly read the brainwaves were there. Why? Why get the unscientific Avengers? Because of plot contrivances is why.

And where were the telepaths? One telepathic scan from SOMEBODY should have told all. And again these tests come back normal....no one thought he could be a clone? Spider-Man has joked to these people about his clones, they know about them. Correct me if I am wrong but at the time of the Avenger’s physical of Peter wasn’t there a character involved with the Avengers who was supposed to be the living universe? SHE couldn’t tell Doc Ock is Spider-Man? The universe literally didn’t know this?

“Even Dr. Strange and Wolverines tests all came back regular.”

If Dr. Strange with all his power wasn’t able to deduce the truth that’s even MORE contrived!

And what the heck were Wolverine’s test? That he smelt the same? Of course he would.

“There was a tiny inconsistency in the brainwaves, it wasnt that no one could read it, its that it was so small that no one would even take notice of it, except for Peter or Ock if they were to look for it.”

See above for why this is bullshit.

“And the Avengers are STILL very suspicious, if you read the current titles.”

At the time a ‘current title’ was  Superior Team Up #1.

In it the Avengers told him they were wrong to put him in probation and are still just ‘suspicious’ when he INVADED SHADOWLAND WITH AN ARMY!. Because THAT’S so usual for Spider-Man right?

“You're entitled to your opinion, but you cant just make up facts and call it a discussion. I get the impression that you a)Havent read the whole series; b) Had already made up your mind before reading the issues you have read; and c) Havent read the companion stories (i.e. Avenging Spider-Man, Superior Team-up, Hickman's Avengers titles). If you look at the story as a whole, its actually quite good.”

Said the guy who got all the above information I outlined WRONG.

From a technical point of view it doesn’t make sense, it uses contrivances and out of character writing to keep it going. You want to write Doc Ock as Spider-Man. Okay then don’t surround him with people who should be able to figure this out. Or say there is some kind of device redirecting their attention.

Don’t have Doc Ock not act like Doc Ock because that defeats the point of the exercise. Don’t go for deliberate sensationalism or crass storytelling which was essentially everything revolving around him hooking up with Mary Jane and then the oh so lovely page of the Superior Spider-Wanker.

That issue in particular even resolved itself in a contrived manner. Doc Ock begins uttering gibberish which recalled One Moment in Time about “we cannot be together because it’s an unsolvable equation blah blah blah”.

Basically he is saying “I can never be with you because of the danger I put you in”; which is Slott using the character as a mouthpiece.

In the next issue Otto began courting a student at his college because consistency rocks. Even Ghost Peter is out of character at this moment “WOW Ock you did the one thing I could never do and walked away from Mary Jane”. Peter is right he probably can’t walk away from Mary Jane but...does he WANT to? Where the heck is this coming from? What is worse is that it’s so unnecessary. There was a MUCH better explanation for Ock breaking up with MJ. If Ock were in character he could just come to the conclusion that sleeping with MJ under these circumstances would be wrong and beneath him hence he wouldn’t go through with it. If Ock was out of character as he was in their issue but still vaguely in character he could just come to the conclusions that since accessing Peter’s memories he’s begun to have genuine feelings for MJ and doesn’t just want to fuck her, it would involve him having a relationship with here which at this point in time he is incapable of, he doesn’t know how to handle it. I will wholeheartedly admit I was not jazzed about the concept of Superior from the outset. If nothing else I want to read about Peter Parker not Doc Ock and if I did want to read about Doc Ock AS Doc Ock, not as Spider-Man and not as an rotting body.

An arc in a comic is one thing doing this long term all the problems I foresaw have come up as well as some I didn’t even predict. This could have worked if Doc Ock was separated from Peter’s supporting cast who should be able to tell something is amiss but then that defeats a lot of the point of the story. It was a lose-lose situation.

People can enjoy garbage if you want but don’t call it gold.

Part 1

[traincat]

Do you think Uncle Ben and May HAVE to be an older couple? I read a pretty good fanfic where Ben and May were younger (Ben was said to be like Rob Lowe|Chris Traeger, if that helps) and also police officers, and Ben volunteered at the FEAST Shelter. I could go more into detail about what they were like (The fic has long since been deleted) but having Ben and May as police officers really added some themes of power and responsibility, and other stuff I can’t share because word limit.

Let me put it this way: I don’t think Ben and May have to be an older couple, but I do feel it serves the canon better than the opposite. Ben and May being older than the parents of Peter’s peers serves to heighten his sense of isolation from them, and in 616 having a frequently ill much older guardian served to cement both Peter’s independence and his sense of responsibility, and probably had something to do with the fact that Peter, in his later relationships, tends to try and take the role of protector, considering he was the primary family breadwinner after Uncle Ben’s death. That being said, I defended Marisa Tomei’s casting when it happened and I still think there’s nothing wrong with either the casting or her performance; she just happens to exist in a film franchise that has both a major problem with women and a deeply weird desire to reallocate Peter’s primary parental relationship elsewhere. It’s not like they cast a 35yo actress to play Aunt May to a 20yo actor’s Peter. Marisa Tomei is a young looking 50, but she’s still 50 – so she’s an appropriate age to be the guardian of a teenager, if a little younger than what we usually expect of May. (That said: they need to stop making haha isn’t it so funny how she’s HOT now jokes, because no it’s not.) Furthermore, I think we have to acknowledge that how we view age in the modern day isn’t the same as how we viewed it in the 60s. The 50 of today is not the 50 of years past, and the 70 of today isn’t the 70 of the 60s. The tropes Aunt May was originally rooted in – the kindly but naive and flighty aunt figure, ala Aunt Clara of Bewitched – no longer really exist, so we have to move forward with a character who has very naturally evolved and developed her own strength through the years. So while it’s not a deal breaker for me to depict them as younger, and while I do think that trying to stick to a 1960-ish Aunt May depiction in modern adaptations is going to seem dated, I do think it misses some of the nuance if Ben and May aren’t on the older side for parents. My sweet spot in adaptations of May are Spider-Man PS4′s May, who is listed as being in her 60s to Peter’s 23 and who manages the FEAST Center in a very hands on manner, and TASM’s May, who was played by Sally Field when she was in her 60s, and who picks up extra shifts while simultaneously training for a new career. We don’t have an exact age for TASM’s May, but she’s old enough to have been married nearly 40 years when Peter is 17 years old, so she’s most likely at least 60.

All that aside, and I haven’t read the fic in question, I’m not sure how I would feel about Ben and May being cops. My instinct is not positively. For one thing, the one parental figure who already exists in Spider-Man who was a cop is Flash Thompson’s father, who was violently physically abusive towards him during his childhood. For another, it feels too close to Peter’s parents, Richard and Mary, who were both SHIELD agents, and aside from that to Spider-Gwen’s setup with Gwen and her father. Also I’m not so sure that stories about cops relating to power and responsibility is such a good fit in the current day; see the criticisms Spider-Man PS4 received for it’s Spider-Cop gag. But it’s not my fanfic and like I said I haven’t read it, so I don’t know how the author handled that subject matter.

[ewh111]

2018 Annual List of Favorite Film Experiences

HAPPY NEW YEAR!!

I hope you’ve been having a great holiday season. It’s been another fun year in film, television, and streaming. It felt like a particularly good year for diverse voices, visions, casts, and storytelling. While I still feel like I’m catching up on year-end releases, here’s my annual list of the ones that have entertained, moved me, provoked thoughts, or just plain stuck with me the most with their story-telling and artistry (In no particular order).

All the best for a wonderful 2019!

Cheers, Ed

Indelible (But VERY Different) Cinematic Experiences

Roma—I wasn’t sure what the hype was about for the first hour which leisurely unfolds before you, but it’s just the build-up as Alfonso Cuaron’s beautiful and powerful film slowly draws you in, and then suddenly grabs you with unexpected emotional impact. An intimate, yet sweeping story of a maid who holds together a crumbling family as her own life combusts. Based on the director’s own life and the woman who raised him, Roma is a complex multi-layered domestic/social/political drama with some truly haunting and indelible sequences. Some may be challenged by the pacing and seeming lack of narrative. Be patient and stick with it; it’s worth it.

Sorry to Bother You—Audacious, original first film and new vision from rapper/hip hop musician Boots Riley starring a terrific Lakeith Stanfield as down on his luck young man who gets a job as a telemarketer and advised by veteran caller Danny Glover to use his “white voice” to become a power caller. The story then takes a twisted wackadoodle turn that truly defies description. This bold and outrageous absurdist social satire/surreal anti-capitalist black comedy also stars an excellent Armie Hammer in a bizzaro role.

A Full House of Documentaries: A Pair of Giants of Our Time and Three of a Kind

Won’t You Be My Neighbor—Celebrating a true hero, it’s a warm and loving look at this pioneer of children’s television who became a role model of kindness and compassion for generations. Little did I realize when watching him as a child the bold and courageous manner in which he addressed the social issues of the day. And it is worthwhile to see the full six-minute video of Fred Rogers Senate testimony that saved funding for public television: https://youtu.be/fKy7ljRr0AA.

RBG—An inspirational telling of the brilliant legal mind who shaped America’s legal landscape on gender equality and women’s rights and became a pop culture icon. 

Three Identical Strangers—Fascinating documentary that starts as a “can’t believe it’s true” tale of separated-at-birth triplets who miraculously find each other as young adults, and then takes a very dark turn as the layers of the story are revealed, raising some real ethical questions about research and the debate about nature vs. nurture.

Additional Docu-series to watch: The Staircase (a gripping and powerful docu-series that is an intimate and detailed look at our criminal justice system as seen through the eyes of a man accused of murder who claims the death of his wife was an accident); The Fourth Estate (a fascinating behind the scenes look at the NY Times and their reporters as they cover the beginning of the Trump administration).

Historical Dramedies

The Death of Stalin—Dark and bitingly funny, this relevant political satire by Armando Iannucci of Veep portrays the intrigue surrounding the flock of sycophantic bureaucrats who vie to become the next Soviet leader after the sudden stroke and death of Stalin. A masterful historical farce with a great cast that includes Steve Buscemi, Jeffrey Tambor, Michael Palin, and Jason Isaacs. And it’s worth noting that the most absurd moments actually did take place (e.g., a rerun concert just to make a recording for Stalin; the alcoholic and meglomaniacal son of Stalin who lost the entire national hockey team by ordering their flight into a snowstorm and then replacing the dead players in hopes his dad wouldn’t notice).

The Favourite—While I decidedly did not care for filmmaker Yorgos Lanthimos’s much acclaimed The Lobster, this is a much more accessible outing. A highly original period/costume piece with an amazing trio of performances from Olivia Colman, Rachel Weisz, and Emma Stone, The Favourite is a dark and wickedly humorous look at the conniving palace intrigue, love triangles, and back-stabbing world of Queen Anne’s court, complete with fops, duck races, pigeon shooting, and rabbits that rule the roost. 

Vice—Not your typical biopic. From the man who brought you The Big Short, Adam McKay delivers an entertaining dark dramedy. Christian Bale wholly transforms into the enigmatic Dick Cheney in this boldly told tale (including a faux Shakespearean pillow talk bit and a mid-film happily-ever-after credit sequence) of a ne'er do well who becomes the most powerful man in the world, all “in the service of the people.” With a very strong supporting cast of Amy Adams as Lynne Cheney, Sam Rockwell as George W. Bush, and Steve Carell as Donald Rumsfeld.

BlacKkKlansman—Director Spke Lee and the producers of Get Out deliver the unbelievably true buddy-cop tale from the 1970s of a black man who goes undercover to infiltrate the KKK by phone while his white Jewish partner stands in for him in face-to-face meetings. Told in a funny and entertaining manner, it’s one of Spike Lee’s best film in years, though it’s unfortunate how little the racial issues have changed over time.

Odes to Stan Lee and the Marvel Cinematic Universe

Black Panther—This is not just another Marvel superhero movie. This is what every origin story should be: a totally immersive world is created with a sophisticated and impressively well-told story, balancing big themes, character development, action, mythology, and strong messaging, including female empowerment. Black Panther is perhaps the best (and most political without being heavy-handed) entry in the MCU while leaving a very large cultural footprint on Hollywood.

Spider-Man: Into the Spider Verse—I really didn’t think we needed another entry into the Spidey world, but this one was truly fantastic, perhaps the best of the bunch. With visually stunning animation unlike anything I’ve seen before, it’s the most trippy, inclusive, and soulful Spider-Man ever, and the one most true to its comic book roots.

More Fantastic Animation, Stop Motion, and CGI

Isle of Dogs–I am an unabashed fan of Wes Anderson, and here he creates a masterful stop motion universe, much more sophisticated and intricate than his last one, the wonderful Fantastic Mr. Fox. Taking place in a fictional dystopian Japan, he creates yet another Andersonian obsessively detailed world, infused with Japanese culture and canines. On the surface, it’s a simple story of a boy seeking his pet dog in a world where dogs have been banished to a trash-filled island, but it works on so many other levels, existential and political. A great cast of voices infuse each character with individuality and nuanced personalities, including Brian Cranston, Edward Norton, and Bill Murray. 

Ready Player One—An unexpectedly wild and entertaining journey, this Spielberg film that takes place in a dystopian future steeped in the nostalgia of the 1980s (video games, movies, music) where its citizens find salvation and escape in a virtual world called the OASIS. The central story of a teen in a whirlwind contest seeking control of the OASIS is a visually stunning and thrilling ride combining live action and CGI that is thoroughly satisfying (though I feel I need to go back to take in all the pop culture references that whirl by).  

Incredibles 2–Well worth the wait after 14 years. Just what you would hope for in summer film. Well-developed characters, action, and story with amazing animation and a terrifically snazzy Michael Giacchino soundtrack.

Other Enjoyable Film Experiences Worth Mentioning

22 July, A Quiet Place, Beautiful Boy, Boy Erased, Crazy Rich Asians, Eighth Grade, Green Book, Love, Simon, Mary Poppins Returns, Mission Impossible: Fallout, Paddington 2, The Price of Everything, Ralph Breaks the Internet, Science Fair, Searching, The Hate U Give, Tully, Victoria & Abdul

In the Queue

A Star Is Born, Burning, Cold War, First Man, First Reformed, Free Solo, The Frontrunner, If Beale Street Could Talk, Shoplifters

Binge-Worthy Television

The Americans, Barry, Succession

For the Foodie Set

Fat Salt Acid Heat, Ugly Delicious

Favorite Theater Experience

Harry Potter and the Cursed Child--if you’re a HP fan, it’s like being reunited with old friends. Great story and incredible stagecraft. 

Trailers

Black Panther: https://youtu.be/xjDjIWPwcPU

BlacKkKlansman: https://youtu.be/0vWHEuhEuno

Incredibles 2: https://youtu.be/i5qOzqD9Rms

Isle of Dogs: https://youtu.be/dt__kig8PVU

RBG: https://youtu.be/biIRlcQqmOc

Ready Player One: https://youtu.be/cSp1dM2Vj48

Roma: https://youtu.be/6BS27ngZtxg

Sorry to Bother You: https://youtu.be/PQKiRpiVRQM

Spider-Man: Into the Spider-Verse: https://youtu.be/g4Hbz2jLxvQ

The Death of Stalin: https://youtu.be/kPpXFnHoC-0

The Favourite: https://youtu.be/SYb-wkehT1g

Three Identical Strangers: https://youtu.be/c-OF0OaK3o0

Vice: https://youtu.be/jO3GsRQO0dM

Won’t You Be My Neighbor: https://youtu.be/FhwktRDG_aQ

[horrorkingdom]

Creepy pasta 🍝

Mary

Allen hurriedly gulped down the last of his milk when he heard the doorbell ring.

“Mom! Chad and Mike are here, I’m leaving for school,” he shouted at the ceiling of the kitchen. He grabbed his backpack off the counter and headed for the door.

“Wait!” His mother rushed down the stairs, half stumbling in the process, stopping him just as he grabbed the door handle. She looked haggard and a worry line creased her brow. Red rimmed eyes gave testament to the fact that she had been crying for some time. His mother absentmindedly adjusted Allen’s scarf with a nervous, shaky hand. “Remember to hurry straight home today, okay?”

“I know, Mom. Mary’s coming today.” At the mention of Mary a choked sob escaped his mother’s throat. Not wanting to see her so distraught Allen tried to cheer her. “Look, why don’t I just stay home today?” he ventured.

“You can’t, honey. You know the rules,” she managed to squeeze out, fighting to quell even more tears. “Now hurry and go.” With that she gave Allen a quick hug, and opened the front door with a sharp jerk, much like yanking off a Band-Aid so as not to prolong the pain. With a forced smile she ushered Allen out into the cold. As she shut the door behind him her sobs returned unbidden. She collapsed against the door, unable to support her own weight. She slid slowly to the floor, the whole time murmuring through her tears, pleading, “Please don’t forget…please don’t forget…”

***

The brisk fall air sent an immediate shock to Allen’s system. He pulled his coat tighter around him, watching his breath curl away in wispy tendrils before turning his eyes to his fellow 3rd grade buddies.

Mike was wearing his usual cocky grin and the ever present glint of mischief was in his eyes. He was the trouble maker in the trio, and as such he was always up for an adventure. By rights of being younger (“Only by a month!” as he was always quick to point out) he was the defacto second in command behind Allen.

Then there was Chad. The kids at school had many names for Chad. They ranged in creativity from “Stupid-head” to “Chard the Tard”, but they all expressed the same point. Chad was slow. Allen’s mother had once told him the technical term for it. To the best of Allen’s recollection it was “high function-something idiot something”. The kids at school chose to focus on the idiot part. What mattered the most to Allen and Mike was that of all the people in Willow Falls, Chad was the most sincere, the most innocent. They took care of him like a younger brother.

“Chad…your shoes are untied again, man!” Allen cast an exasperated look towards Mike. “Why didn’t you help him out?”

Mike, looking hurt and indignant at the same time, responded, “I tried, but you know he only lets you do it.”

Allen let loose a sigh that clearly stated how heavy the burden of the world weighed on his shoulders and bent to tie Chad’s shoes.

“Loop once, loop twice, and it all looks nice!” Chad sang his shoe tying song as Allen went about the work. “Friends to the end,” he rhymed again once Allen had finished. Most people found Chad’s chosen manner of communication irritating, but to Allen and Mike it is was one of his more endearing qualities.

“Chad buddy, you really need to learn to do that on your own. I might not be around to help next time.” Allen’s gentle admonishment was met with a warm smile and enthusiastic nod of Chad’s head. “Alright, Triumphant Trio, off to school!”

“I’m not a fool, I go to school!” chimed Chad as he fell in with the others.

Together the three youngsters made their way down Birch Lane heading for Willow Falls Grade School. Willow Falls was a quaint little town, no more than 100 families, and thus the walk from Allen’s house to school was relatively short. The boys made good time, all the while chatting about whatever it is that interested boys of their age. Chad would chip in with a well-timed rhyme causing all three to laugh. Considering what day it was, the boys were in rather high spirits.

“…and that’s when I pulled her hair!” Mike was in full story telling mode as he regaled his two friends with his latest misadventure involving his neighbor Sally. Arms swung and hands gestured to emphasize every point by pantomiming his actions. Despite the cold, he was working up a nice flush in his eagerness to relate the tale. Allen listened intently, nodding sagaciously. Chad, not fully grasping all the nuances of the story, took his cues from Allen. “Then she got this weird look in her eyes and started leaning tor-,” Mike stopped talking abruptly.

Allen looked up to see what had made his friend pause. He saw it immediately. They were coming up on the gate. The malice emanating forth from the gate was so evident that even Chad was able to recognize it.

“Chad hate bad gate,” he stated in a choked whisper. Both Allen and Mike nodded their agreement to Chad’s simple assessment, but words failed the other two boys. This was The-Gate-That-No-One Opened. Standing 8’ tall, the gate loomed over any who passed by it. The truly intricate details that went into the ironwork were only visible upon close inspection, most however, never got that close. Even Mike, the brave one, would not come within more than a few feet of it. The hinges on the gate had long since rusted, and the gate had looked ready to topple over for years. But it had not. Instead it maintained its constant vigil, forever standing sentinel to that which was behind it.

On the other side of the gate a worn cobblestone path ran straight for 15’ or so before rounding a bend and disappearing behind the giant hedges. No one knew exactly where the path lead, for on the other side of The-Gate-That-No-One-Opened was The-Park-That-No-One-Entered. Located in the geographical center of Willow Falls, the true name of the park was lost in the annals of the town’s history. In the middle of the massive park, rising above the hedges and sitting on the crest of a hill, stood the willow tree. Some quirk in the lay of the land made the willow visible from anywhere in town while the rest of the park lay shrouded in secret behind the surrounding hedges. The town founders had likely seen the tree and named the town after it. That was just speculation of course, just as it was general consensus that the path behind the gate most likely led to the willow tree.

With an unspoken agreement the boys hastened their steps, eager to escape the unnatural silence and icy dread that overcame all who crossed the gate’s path.

“Maybe we should just go back home today.” This from Mike, the brave one.

“No, we have to go to school,” answered Allen. “You know the rules. We all do.”

“Yeah, but…” he let his protestation trail off and instead turned his attention to stepping on every dead leaf that came within reach of his feet.

“School’s the rule,” Chad intoned with his head hanging and hands in his pockets, the walking picture of dejection. The boys continued down Birch Lane.

***

It had been another typical day at WFGS. At recess some of the other 3rd grade boys had devised a new game. They thought it would be funny to stuff a sock down Chad’s pants and try to get him to chase his “tail”. Chad, always hoping to please, had gleefully complied. Misunderstanding their teasing laughter for encouragement had caused him to try all the more enthusiastically. If there was one talent Chad did have, it was his ability to completely focus on one task to the exclusion of all else. This only lent fuel to the laughter as he doggedly spun in circles, determined to catch the sock. Mike and Allen were quick to intervene. One of the boys was sporting a growing black eye where Allen had punched him. Mike, fresh from the principal’s office (“My second homeroom,” as he liked to call it), already had his name on the board.

“At least it wasn’t Pin the Card on the Tard again.”

“Yeah,” agreed Allen. “Hey don’t look now, but they’re at it again!”

Ignoring Allen’s advice, Mike whipped his head around just in time to catch Sally and her group of friends peeking his way. They quickly ducked their heads back together and returned to hushed whispers laced with intermittent giggles.

“I don’t know what’s wrong with Sally,” Mike said with a look of consternation on his face. “Ever since yesterday she’s been acting weird and looking at me funny. Maybe I-“

Mike was cut short as the 3 chimes of the P.A. system declared an upcoming message from Principal Ladsen. Ms. Shoemaker, with her stern hair bun and horn-rimmed glasses immediately set to shushing everyone. Due to what day it was, quiet and attention were quick in coming. The eyes and ears of the twenty-three nine year olds in her class were focused on the loud speaker in the corner. The same was true for every classroom throughout WFGS.

Some slight feedback was followed by a hiss and a pop, trailed by Principal Ladsen clearing his throat. Finally he began to speak.

“Alright everyone, listen up,” he commenced rather unnecessarily. “We all know what day it is, so I need you all to go straight home. Don’t dally in front of the school, or stop on the playground. As soon as the bell rings, in about 5 minutes or so, you children get right back to your houses. That’s all.” Three chimes indicated the message was over.

The principal’s proclamation had set a noticeably somber mood through the halls of the school. In the back of the class, a small, timid hand raised slowly in the air.

“Yes, Stewart?” Ms. Shoemaker was slightly taken aback to actually have some form of interaction from the normally withdrawn Stewart. “What is it?”

“Ma’am, um…if it’s so important we go home right away…I mean…um…why can’t our parents just come pick us up?” His voice quavered quite a bit.

“Because,” she said around a sad, understanding sigh. “It’s not allowed. You all know what the Town Charter says. You know the rules, straight home.” As if to help punctuate her answer, the bell chose that moment to ring. She had to raise her voice to be heard over all the scooting chairs. “Now remember, children! Straight home!” Her voice had become shrill as it chased the children out the door, “Don’t forget!”

***

The halls of WFGS were eerily quiet. The chattering and general hubbub of an entire school’s worth of youngsters were replaced by grim looks and muttered whispers quickly hushed. The clatter of hundreds of shoes was supplanted by hesitant, slow steps, heading for the exits. Allen and the other members of his threesome followed along swept up in the silent, inexorable tide. Even Chad seemed to pick up and reciprocate the mood.

No one stopped at the playground. The usual groups did not gather at their usual spots. The hopscotch area was forsaken, children walking past it without a second glance. The words of the principal were heeded. The children had been trained well. They were prepared for this day. Within 5 minutes the school yard was completely deserted. The only sound came from a squeaky swing as the wind slowly pushed it back and forth.

***

The Triumphant Trio turned onto Birch Lane. Few words passed between them. Heads ducked, a few furtive glances exchanged. Every now and then a chilly fall breeze would whip around them, carrying a few leaves across the sidewalk. Other than that, the boys walked in silence.

Almost as if they could sense its presence, and all of the same mind, the boys crossed the street in order to skirt the gate. Despite his better judgment, Allen risked a glance. In the distance, on the hill, the willow tree danced in the wind. Its massive low hanging branches skipped across the ground. Allen imagined that he could hear the branches clacking together, even over this great distance, and to his young ears the noise sounded like macabre laughter. It gave Allen the impression that the tree was eager, full of glee for the upcoming events.

A shiver ran itself along the length of Allen’s spine, and he quickly jerked his gaze back down, staring at the pavement as he placed one foot in front of the other. He wished he hadn’t looked.

Soon, not as soon as they would have liked, the trio were outside Allen’s house. The air had already grown noticeably colder, and the light was starting to wane, fading faster than usual. Shadows of streetlamps and trees began stretching across the pavement, long skinny fingers searching, searching.

Mike, the brave one, barely looked at his friends as he gave them a perfunctory wave. He quickly turned on his heels and high-tailed it to his house across from Allen’s. Allen couldn’t blame him; he felt the urge to run home himself. He turned his attention to Chad.

“Alright, buddy. Remember, head straight home, okay?”

“I won’t be late for my dinner plate!” Allen couldn’t help but smile despite the situation.

“Straight home, Chad.” Chad gave Allen his usual grin and enthusiastic nod before turning and heading home. His house was at the end of Birch Lane, on the other side of the curve, just out of view. For a while Allen stood and watched, torn between walking his dear friend home and heading home himself. He had just made up his mind to escort Chad when his attention was drawn by a frantic banging.

He turned and looked at his house to see his mother pounding hectically away on the window. When she saw she had his attention she began forcefully gesturing, and the look in her eyes left no doubt about her intentions. Allen regretfully put all thoughts of chasing Chad from his mind and bounded up the stairs to his porch and into the safety of his home.

If Allen’s mother hadn’t gotten his attention in that instant, if he had just kept watching Chad as he rounded the curve, if he had looked a moment longer, he might have seen his best friend trip.

***

Chad had skinned his hands in the fall. It was okay, though, he fell often. He was used to it. His shoelaces had come undone again. They were the culprits behind his loss of balance! He looked around expectantly, waiting for Allen to tie his shoe for him. Then he remembered what Allen had said this morning. Allen wasn’t here to help him.

A fierce light of determination began to glow in Chad’s eyes. An idea began to formulate in his slow mind. He would tie his shoes himself and make Allen proud. With his giant grin on his face Chad eagerly set to work.

“Loop once, loop twice…”

***

Allen’s mother reached through the gap in the door and pulled her son into the house. She hugged him tightly. After she had satisfied herself that he was indeed real and home safely she pushed him out to arm’s length and glared at him.

“What in the world were you thinking?!” she demanded. “I told you to come straight home!”

“I was just going to make sure Chad got home and then I was going to run right back!” he protested.

“No Allen! No! You know the rules!”

“Okay, I’m sorry! I got it. Mary’s coming.”

***

Throughout the town of Willow Falls all the preparations for the night were the same. Doors were locked, curtains were drawn, and parents gathered up their children. They huddled together in whatever room they felt the most secure, hoping the events of the night would pass quickly. It was no different in Allen’s home.

He and his mother sat in the living room, lights dimmed. She hadn’t let him out of her sight since he’d gotten home. Every few seconds she looked his way, verifying he hadn’t disappeared.

***

Sometime between the late afternoon and dusk, Willow Falls changed. The cold deepened even more. Darkness seemed to envelope the town, bringing with it an unnatural silence. The wind slowed, and then eventually petered out altogether. No birds chirped, no squirrels squeaked. It was as if the town was a void, no sound, no movement, and at the epicenter of this lifeless black hole stood the willow tree.

In that dead, deafening silence, the town waited. In that silence, the heavy, oppressive silence, Time itself held its breath. And into that silence came a squeal. The cry of tortured metal reverberated throughout the town as centuries old rusted hinges were forced to grind against each other. On and on the sound came, setting nerves on edge and jaws to clenching. After an unbearable amount of time, the squealing thankfully stopped. The gate was open.

For half a heartbeat all was deathly still again. Then the whistling began. A slow haunting tune that carried on without end. A horribly unnatural sound that never paused for breath. It came under the doors, through the walls, found its way under pillows and through fingers, found its way in despite all efforts to keep it out. A ceaseless barrage of a nightmarish melody that searched out every soul, eroding strength and engendering despair. The whistling was the herald. Mary had come.

***

Allen and his mother clung to one another. Eyes were squeezed tightly shut against the terrible, incessant whistling. The tune blotted out all else, muted all thought, leaving only the desire to cower in fear.

When the first footstep was heard on their porch they both held their breath. Slow, even paces took the steps one at a time, not in the least of a hurry. One by one the heavy steps came closer to the door and stopped.

The knock came, causing his mother to jerk and let out a little scream. She squeezed Allen to her all the tighter, rocking back and forth, whispering “No no no…”to herself over and over again as if it were her mantra of protection.

Another knock, not at all ungentle, almost shy.

“Please…” came the voice, a little girl’s. “Please…let me in. It’s so cold, and I’m hungry.” It was a pitiful plea that tore at the heart.

A third knock.

His mother was in tears now as she pressed his head to her chest. “Just go away, Mary.” She quietly pleaded.

“Please, it’s so cold. I’m hungry.” A fourth knock. “Please…”

“Leave us alone!” his mother shouted, fear lending power to her voice. On the other side of the door came an infinitely disappointed sigh. The weighty footsteps turned and slowly receded back to the road, leaving them to their isolation. Allen and his mother shared a look that communicated much. They were relieved that their trial was passed, but they knew they were not the first, nor would they be the last.

The ritual was repeated again and again throughout Willow Falls. Always the timid knock, followed by a heart-wrenchingly pathetic plea for shelter from the cold. And always hungry, always so hungry. The whistling continued on.

***

Success! He had finally wrestled the tricky laces into a knot. Chad was extremely proud of himself, and he couldn’t wait to tell Allen. Chad stood with a rare smile of self-satisfaction. Few and far between were the moments when he accomplished something on his own.

It was then that he noticed the whistling. He had forgotten! His mother, the principal, Allen, they all had told him to go straight home, but he had tripped. He had been so focused on tying his shoes that he had lost track of time. His house was only two doors down. He could see his mother in the window screaming through the glass, willing him to get his feet moving. He could still make it home, he still had time.

He took a step. Too late.

“Please…” the voice came from behind him. He could see the despair in his mother’s face, hands clutched to her chest. She was sobbing. He knew he should run. He knew it, but he couldn’t make his body work. Fear paralyzed him. “Please look at me.”

“N-no…” he stammered. His heart raced in his chest. Tears flowed freely from his eyes, matching his mother’s.

“Look at me please!” the voice beseeched.

“I’m not supposed to. I should have gone home.” No rhyming now, he was too terrified. His eyes watched his mother through the window. Her face drained of all blood, her eyes rolled back, and she fell out of view. “Allen told me to go home. My momma is w-waiting.” By now his whole body was trembling.

“Look at me.” Not a plea anymore.

“Allen told me…” His slow mind, dimmed further by terror, barely registered the warm stain spreading down his pant leg.

“Look at me!” The final command sapped the last of his meager resistances. His body was no longer his own. He managed a few whimpers as he was forced to turn and look at Mary.

***

The whistling was different now. Still haunting, yet a subtle undertone was different. Something had changed.

Allen’s mother noticed it just as he had. She scooted to the window and pulled back the curtain just enough to peek out. She gasped, covering her mouth with her hand.

“Oh poor Martha!”

Martha? That was Chad’s mother! Panic filled Allen’s heart. Before his mother could react he yanked back the curtains so forcefully that they fell from the rods. There! Mary was just out of his field of vision, but he could clearly see the small inert form that was being dragged behind.

“Chad!” Allen beat his fists against the glass. “Chad!” Logic and reason were forgotten in worry for his best friend. He raced for the door, prepared to charge out into the cold. His mother was faster and tackled him from behind.

“No! Stop, Allen! You can’t help him, baby!” For a moment they wrestled around, but she used her superior weight to keep him pinned to the floor.

“I told him to go home! How did he forget?” Guilt and shame drained Allen of any energy he had left to fight his mother. “I should have walked him home! How did he forget?”

***

Somewhere in the middle of The-Park-That-No-One-Entered an innocent, simple-minded boy began to scream. It was a scream of anguish, a scream of terror, a scream of pain. The scream carried on until it was drowned out by another scream. This was the scream of tortured metal as the gate once again began its harsh journey. The whistling stopped. The gate closed, not to open for another year.

The wind began to blow, leaves began to skitter. Birds chirped and squirrels squeaked. It was as if Time began to breathe again and life returned to the dead void.

Somewhere another boy sat, lost within himself, lost to his grief. His eyes wide open, staring at all, seeing nothing.

“How could he forget?”

Loop once, loop twice…

Someone always forgets.

Credit To – The Fox God

[eternaleve]

‘Simply Henry’

Welcome back costume and history fiends.

Thanks for those blank staring eyes, Henners. No nightmares here.

‘Henry and his court look to sign the treaty with France, though tempers of both kings flare up at the summit. Meanwhile, Henry takes on a new mistress named Mary Boleyn, though he soon tires of her and Mary’s sister, Anne, is summoned to the court.’

There’s a lot that takes place in this episode. I mean, the stuff with Mary Boleyn could cover an episode in itself but the pace just rattles on through several really important things.

What The Heckaroonie is a Field of Cloth of Gold Anyway?

The Field of Cloth of Gold was a peace summit between Francis I of France and Henry VIII of England, Ireland, and France that took place between the 7th and 24th of June 1520. The really interesting thing about English foreign policy under Henry and Cardinal Wolsey is their interest in creating England as a peaceful arbiter of Europe – to live out Renaissance Humanist policies in real life political policy. The Field of Cloth of Gold was designed to increase the bond between the French and English monarchs after the 1514 Anglo-French treaty. It was also a chance to show off. Both Henry and Francis were incredibly young, flashy, Renaissance monarchs who wanted to strut their stuff.

There’s a lot about the summit that is actually pretty accurate. Someone did really care about getting some of the finer details right.

This is a 1545 painting from Hampton Court depicting the Field of Cloth of Gold. You can see the English Palace of Illusion, a wine fountain, and Henry and Francis wrestling.

So, these parts are really quite accurate. What’s not so accurate is Henry turning around and throwing a massive temper tantrum.

You see, he lost a wrestling match. And as a perfectly logical thing for a twenty nine year old man to do, he’s having a temper tantrum that involves destroying all his belongings with an axe. The Tudors has gone for a very strange characterisation of Henry. They proclaim to be a new and interesting look at the young Henry, but this involves making him into a screaming, bawling brat with limited character depth.

Henners is also upset that Charles V of Spain, nephew to his wife, has become Holy Roman Emperor and pretty much the most powerful man in Europe. Only this happened in 1519, not 1520, so he’s having a bit of a delayed reaction.

‘Tis a Pity She’s A Whore

The next big thing in the episode is that Mary and Anne Boleyn are more formally introduced and start making things happen. Also they’re WHOOOOOOOOORRRESSSSS, sexy, sexy whores to add all this amazing sex appeal with their naughty sexy behaviour.

I hope I laid the sarcasm on thick enough. I generally find the portrayal of the Boleyn sisters to be pretty poor in anything, and I think Mary’s depiction is pretty degrading. (FYI, my family is descended from Mary Boleyn. Actually. So I tend to get very personally protective of her.)

Let’s compare the Tudors version of Mary and the real one.

Mary is introduced in a brothel/bar/some place full of sex workers. Because she’s a WHOOORRRRREEEEEE. She’s some woman that Francis I sleeps with – his ‘English Mare’ – and she’s shown as a stupid, slutty woman that has no idea what she’s doing in life other than looking for dick.

It’s a very nuanced character, you see.

In real life, Mary was an accomplished courtier who had been educated in the usual manner of a Tudor gentry woman. You know, maths, reading and writing, grammar, two or three languages, dancing, embroidery, music, singing, gaming, falconry, riding, and hunting. Maybe she wasn’t an overwhelming genius of science or theology, but she was still a highly educated woman. And her education didn’t involve sucking dick.

Suck my thumb. Do it. Show me your French wiles.

  Mary, it transpires, has been at the French court for two years. That makes this episode set in 1516, then. Mary Boleyn was sent to the French court in the retinue of Mary, Henry’s sister, when she was sent to marry Louis XII of France in 1514.

In real life, Mary and Henry did not meet until 1520 when she returned to the English court to be married. She may or may not have been a mistress to Francis I, but I would err on not. It’s very convenient for her to sleep around because it makes the family look bad, and I suspect it’s gossip that gets reported as fact. Henry and Mary did have an affair, but we don’t really know when or for how long. There’s actually very little evidence of their affair, other than Henry admitting it later when he needed to marry her sister, Anne.

Anyway, her dick sucking is not as good as advertised, and Henry tires of her.

So the Howard and Boleyn families decide that Anne should step forward and seduce Henry. Because over the course of fifty minutes, where Mary was in two scenes with Henry in total, they were showered with such preference and wealth and prestige that they’re just going to throw Anne at Henners and see if it sticks.

I don’t especially like the whole ‘the Boleyns and Howards planned and maliciously duped Henry for their own power’ idea which pervades shitty historical fiction, and this makes no sense in time. It’s 1520 – or 1516, or 1518 – and Anne and Henry did not become  involved until 1525/1526. Anne wasn’t even in England until 1522. They’re throwing her at him about six years too early.

Also There’s Some Treason

Yeah, the Duke of Buckingham is still plotting away. But not for too long because he’s going to die.

He’s gathering up people loyal to him and he’s going to… do something. Either just outright murder Henners or launch full, open rebellion. In real life, Edward Stafford did no such thing. There’s accusations of him doing treasonous things, such as talking about the death of the King and his lack of children, but he was never outright going to just stab him.

He’s also dressed just like Henry.

Literally just the same outfit. If you wanted to hire the guy as Henry, why didn’t you.

Anyway, Buckingham gets caught. Because he wasn’t exactly being subtle.

How could this happen to me, I made a mistake…..

Then some real bullshit takes place with his execution.

This is a catalogue of wrong. Executions of the nobility were generally private affairs, not open to the common sorts of the public. He’s a peer – and even in death, he’s treated with honour. He would not be dragged to his place of execution and he would not sob and weep on the scaffold. Yes, it’s awful to be dying, but he’s a member of the nobility. He would conduct himself with dignity and grace as to not reflect badly on himself and his family.

And a friend of Henners would not be holding a man’s arms down for an execution. That’s just… good lord, it’s terrible. What a terrible, sensationalised depiction of an execution.

Buckingham’s execution is secured by the Duke of Norfolk, uncle to Anne and Mary Boleyn. He’s blackmailed into this position by Charles Brandon, close friend to Henners, giving him his father’s ring. You see, the Duke of Norfolk’s father was executed by Henry VII.

There’s a lot of wrong in this short two minute scene.

For a start, Thomas Howard as not the Duke of Norfolk in 1520. His father would not die until 1524. Thomas Howard, 2nd Duke of Norfolk, died of old age in his bed. He was not executed by Henry VII. That would certainly be a feat of time travel, seeing as Henners 7 had been dead for twenty five years at that point. You could say that they conflated the third and second dukes, sure. Only the first Duke of Norfolk was not executed by Henners 7 either. He died from an arrow to the face at the Battle of Bosworth. So, there’s nothing really right in this scene. Especially to have Charles Brandon threaten the frigging Duke of Norfolk in the street.

Also, the Duke of Buckingham was arrested and executed in 1521. This was a plotline that could have been allowed to develop for longer; as such, it feels like a rush of hot air that goes nowhere.

God, I Have a Son!

Henry’s mistress, despite finding out that she’s pregnant in the last episode, is already popping it out. Even though it’s Christmas 1520, and Henry Fitzroy was born the 15th of June 1519.

Tudor women didn’t generally give birth lying in a bed. They used a birthing chair. If they were in a bed, it was the pallet bed that would be underneath the main bed. You don’t want to ruin your nice bed with blood and afterbirth. People have to sleep on that.

Henners is so overjoyed at this arrival of an illegitimate son that he almost breaks his neck. Good job holding the baby. Guess we know why only one of your children with Katherine survived.

Sashay Shantay

Collars and high necks are very in this episode. Shame they don’t really become fashionable in Europe until the 1530s. Francis was fashionable, but not this fashion forward. He needs to be wearing a low, square neckline.

This is better. Square shoulders with undergarments showing. The hair is weird though. Too modern. Even him that nice chinlength bob Tudor men wore.

Where are your undergarments, Francis??? Your doublet is silk. You know what ruins silk? Water! What is your sweat made of? Water! Keep your clothes fresh and non-stinky with your underwear!

The collar on Henry’s outfit is far too high, and the doublet looks like it’s from the later half of the sixteenth century. It’s still far better than whatever this get up that Francis has on. Weird Swiss Guard/Fall of the Roman Empire runway look there, Francis. You brought a concept here, but it really doesn’t fit. At all.

Henry is clearly the architect of the Puritan movement. For some reason. He’s a king. He needs to look it.

Canadian beaver realness. To be honest, there is not enough fur on these costumes. I know that fur is not looked upon with favour these days, but he should be decked out in the finest of ermine and cheetah. Henry should look more kingly. More money, more power.

Turns out the greatest hunt is man.

Thomas Boleyn is continuing his fight against bad costumes. His remain the most accurate. Bless you, you evil man. Bless your ongoing stance against high collars.

Curtain Realness

The exposed shoulders are a bit iffy, as is the single colour for the gowns. Skirts had underskirts of a separate colour. The one colourness is a little cheap for two queens. And there are no trumpet sleeves.

That nursemaid is straight out of the 1590s. That’s some impressive time travel.

How hard is it to make a bloody hood? Women did not have their hair uncovered in public. Women didn’t have uncovered hair in public until the fricking 1960s, and they certainly wouldn’t in the 1520s. I hate the jewelled headpieces, I hate the stupid headband thing, and I laughed at the strange Nefertiti inspired headpiece worn by the French queen because I have literally no idea what it’s supposed to be. I like her expression though.

It’s the latest in Tudor maternity wear; pregnancy sack! With added useless shoulder cutouts! Because that’s what you want when you’re pregnant. Not easy access to a toilet, painkillers, and something loose to wear. Cold shoulders is what you really need.

To prove that Mary Boleyn is a whore, they’ve literally dressed her as a Venetian prostitute.

Why is your hair loose? Where are your trumpet sleeves? There is an incredibly famous picture of Katherine – use that! Use that as your basis for her clothing and design around that. We know how she dressed, and it was not like this.

What the fuck is on your head.

Bessie Blunt is wearing some Restoration gown. Look at those thin sleeves and cuffs – seventeenth century, ish. The hair net is fine, some women did wear them, but look at that woman on the right. That is a 1490s style hood there. Did you get it from your grandmother? That’s thirty years out of fashion, and it’s still not right. The front part of her head is out.

That waiting woman is wearing a seventeenth century dress. They took that straight off the rack of an English civil war drama and thought ‘eh, it’ll do’. Her hood is Elizabethan as well.

In Other News

The Pope’s dead. Sorry bout it.

Unpicking the Tudors; S1 EP2 'Simply Henry' Welcome back costume and history fiends. ‘Henry and his court look to sign the treaty with France, though tempers of both kings flare up at the summit.

[mittensmorgul]

For the first time in weeks, I had exactly zero messages, anon or otherwise, asking me about the new episode. Let me say, I feel y’all’s apathy. There were a few things that are worth mentioning, though.

First of all I AM THRILLED THAT GAVIN WAS RESTORED TO HIS PROPER TIMELINE. As to HOW and WHY and all the rest of the details surrounding Gavin’s return... I’m just gonna...

BUT IT IS DONE. I am more than willing to just close my eyes to the timey-wimey bullshit fixing their original problem dredged up. It’s just gonna give me a migraine trying to sort through this problem. I just... can’t be fussed to care.

For ~plot reasons~ I’m just gonna... handwave the whole mess and pretend it’s just... not a problem anymore and just move on with my life. Especially since it didn’t really seem like Bucklemming themselves could be fussed to do it much justice. The whole plotline played out with the feeling that they’d been ordered to clean up their mess by Dabb and they went about it in the most perfunctory and grudging manner possible.

Okay. :)

On to the other important plot-related stuff, in order from least disappointing to most disappointing:

Mary’s descent arc is moving along apace. Those BMoL weapons that we find absolutely morally reprehensible (that mutate vampire blood to poison them en masse like some sort of radiation sickness, and now a ray gun that boils rugaru brains at twenty paces), Mary thinks they’re neat and effective tools. Her “training” session with Ketch was a more voluntary and only slightly less horrifying callback to Castiel’s “training” under Naomi to kill a warehouse full of Deans. To an extent, I think when Dean learns the entire truth about Mary’s involvement with the BMoL, it’ll have the same metaphorical impact. Basically a room full of “you’re dead to me” Deans... a la “the face.”

(aside to note that all I could think of when Mary complained about “the face” was Phil Dunphy on Modern Family talking about how “in the know” he is about the kids’ lingo... before listing off the acronyms he knew... including WTF, which he sincerely believed stood for “why the face.” WHY THE FACE. And yes. This was a serious WTF for me... in the correct meaning of wtf...)

So yeah, Mary’s come ~partially~ clean to Sam and Dean. She’s been willing to accept Ketch’s statements about Toni having been a “rogue operative” who wasn’t working within the authority of the MoL, but Sam and Dean have seen just a little bit too far behind their curtain. They’ve also had experience with these sort of shady deals, and unlike Mary, they’ve grown FAR past the “shoot first, ask questions later, just kill ALL THE MONSTERS” mentality. Mary still believes in that definition of hunting. On top of all the guilt she feels personally-- rightly or wrongly-- for the lives her boys ended up leading.

That fundamental core belief is in need of some serious shaking, and I think (I hope!) that 12.14 begins to address that for her. She’s still keeping some secrets (like her role in having been ordered to steal THE COLT in 12.12...) so Sam and Dean are still partially in the dark as to the extent of her shady dealings. There’s definitely more revelations to come to light before they have all the information they need to begin putting the RIGHT questions to Mary...

Dagon’s an interesting character. Kinda relieved she was used so lightly in this episode, so they didn’t have a chance to do anything regrettable with her... but still... both she and the two angels had no trouble finding Kelly, when Cas and Sam and Dean have been looking for her for weeks now with no success. I’m now rolling my eyes at the logic gap with that one, but then I remember Bucklemming and again it’s just easier to handwave it and accept they lack a grasp of narrative continuity and logic. *HEAVY SIGHING*

I’m slightly confused as to how she was able to just annihilate two angels so easily when Ramiel needed to use Michael’s lance on Cas... but then again maybe he could’ve just poofed Cas to death and he just wanted to watch him suffer with the wound from the lance instead. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

(I should probably just title this essay *shrug emoji*)

(anyway, moving on)

Rowena was a delight, as usual. I love that she’s developed her own interesting relationship with Sam and Dean, independent of Crowley. And despite the fact that Rowena has worked with Crowley when their motivations were to defeat a common enemy, it’s interesting to see the sort of situation that has the power to drive a wedge between them.

I’m glad that Rowena’s grudge over being forced to kill Oskar has finally gotten a little payback. I also find it interesting that her revenge also including a “child” who had been “displaced in time.” Rowena had given Oskar immortality, which in its own way is just as problematic as Crowley’s desire to give Gavin a shot at a normal life in the wrong time.

Crowley’s weirdly powerful feelings toward Gavin, I believe, stem from just how human and vulnerable he’d been through most of s9 when he was at the peak of his human blood addiction. Granted by 9.21 he’d “recovered” a lot from that, but he was also biding his time waiting for Dean to completely succumb to the Mark. Crowley had some weirdly familial feelings for Gavin, after having largely ignored the boy for most of his life. Getting a chance to give Gavin a taste of normal modern life was probably the least he could do to repent for that... but the fact he STILL seemed to care so much now is just... weird. IDK.

I saw another post complaining that Sam and Dean didn’t “let” Crowley have a proper goodbye, and Rowena had frozen him when he’d reached out to Gavin. BUT CROWLEY WAS NOT ABOUT TO SHARE A TEARFUL GOODBYE. HE WAS ABOUT TO BOOP OUT WITH GAVIN AND TAKE HIM TO PLACES UNKNOWN TO PREVENT HIM FROM RETURNING TO HIS PROPER TIMELINE. So, no. I don’t think their actions there were hypocritical.

Dean’s shirt during the “Send Gavin Back To The Bottom of the Ocean” scene was eerily similar to the ugly plaid couch on which Cas nearly died in 12.12. So, watching Gavin reunited for all time with the “love of his life” while wearing the goofiest look on his face as these people who were brought back together by the power of their love in order to repair a broken timeline and restore a bunch of innocent people to life... *it’s all about the love... and love* and I mean thanks costume and props folks for dressing Dean in Castiel’s 12.12 couch basically. I see what you did there. I only put this so far down the list because it’s interesting, but that’s all it is.

Cas and Dean are still having private phone calls. But after the intensity of 12.12, and the revelations about Cas and his feelings, what we were given as a reminder here was just... underwhelming. There was just no weight to it, as if 12.12 hadn’t even happened. As if Cas hadn’t nearly DIED, and confessed his LOVE and feeling of FAMILY and BELONGING. It’s just... opportunity wasted to have given some sort of (or ANY sort of) emotional punch to the fact that Cas has just ~randomly left the bunker to fruitlessly continue the random Kelly search~ all alone. I mean... ???

Crowley. Oh dear. Can you say, Character Assassination??? I mean, wtf, bucklemming. After one of Crowley’s strongest episodes in YEARS, where we got a plethora of incredible insight into his motivations, his history, his intelligence, and his FEELINGS for the Winchesters-- including Cas-- all of a sudden we get this ridiculous disaster of characterization?

Seriously, WHAT THE FUCK.

What was both ridiculous and terrible here:

Crowley really had no idea that the Winchesters had failed to kill the nephilim?

THEY HAD BEEN IN PRISON BUCKLEMMING! REMEMBER? WHERE YOU’D PUT THEM WITHIN MINUTES OF THEM BANISHING LUCIFER IN THE FIRST PLACE?! AND IT WAS YOUR STUPID FUCKING PLOT HOLE THAT ALLOWED THAT TO HAPPEN IN THE SAME MOMENTS THAT KELLY WAS ALLOWED TO “ESCAPE.”

I mean, you could’ve just left her in the White House with the President and had Cas escape safely with Sam and Dean, BECAUSE YOU, CROWLEY, HAD THE ABILITY TO JUST BOOP IN AND PICK KELLY UP TO DO WHATEVER YOU WANTED WITH HER DOWN THE LINE. BUT NOOOOOOOO IT’S YOUR OWN DAMN IDIOTIC CANON ACROBATICS THAT HAVE LED US TO THIS INANE PLOT SITUATION FROM WHICH THERE IS APPARENTLY NO REPRIEVE. YOU STUPID FUCKERS.

So in order to make this entirely idiotic and contrived plot line work, you have to warp a character so far beyond logic that they barely even seem to be the same character we saw the week before... and no. After the brilliant writing, the loving recollection of past canon and the incredibly nuanced characterizations we’ve had over the prior three episodes, this just felt THAT MUCH MORE FUCKING CONTRIVED AND WRONG FOOTED.

I’m not really gonna forgive this bit.

Crowley, Mr. “i’m the only one on the board who doesn’t underestimate those denim wrapped nightmares,” Mr. King of Protecting his own Self Interest, Mr. You’re Good But I’m Crowley... you... bucklemming... want us to believe that in ANY ITERATION OF REALITY that Crowley is not only petty and vengeful enough to have his demons pull the same “resurrect the meatsuit” bullshit they pulled to fix your meatsuit with in 11.01 TO DIG UP AND REPAIR LUCIFER’S FORMER VESSEL NICK, as well as “studying the molecular makeup of the cage” in order to forge some weird dog collar thing strong enough to hold Lucifer, and that you would risk unleashing Lucifer on the world again ENTIRELY OUT OF PETTY VENGEANCE BECAUSE YOU WANT TO FORCE HIM TO CLEAN YOUR FLOOR WITH HIS TONGUE?!

I’m sorry. That’s just... no. That’s too much no.

AND IT GETS WORSE!

Not only is Crowley suddenly behaving idiotically out of character here, HE IS ALSO SUDDENLY MORONIC ENOUGH TO LET INFORMATION SLIP IN LUCIFER’S HEARING? Like the fact that he even had a son at all, let alone was having some sort of ~personal issues~ surrounding this weird parental family dynamic?

AND CROWLEY IS REPEATEDLY PUTTING HIMSELF IN A SITUATION WHERE HE’S LET HIMSELF BECOME COMPROMISED THIS WAY?!

I mean... this is NOT the Crowley we’ve seen lately. The Crowley who would sacrifice the only weapon that could potentially put Lucifer out permanently. One of the FEW weapons that could even protect him from what he should likely expect will be the revenge of Dagon and Asmodeus after Crowley essentially broke his deal with Ramiel... yet he’s too busy being a petty little tyrant toward Lucifer to be concerned about them?

I guess I’m particularly outraged about this 180 degree about face in Crowley’s characterization because after three OUTSTANDINGLY character driven episodes in a row, what we got here was a TERRIBLE FUCKING MESS.

Most of s12 so far has felt so deeply personal, like all of the major plot arcs have been deeply rooted in the characters own feelings and history, and have revolved around the questions of what is family and what is love and who am I and where do I fit in this world.

And in 12.13, it seems like ALL of that was just tossed out the window in favor of a couple of utterly contrived and flimsy plot points.

With a few obvious exceptions as stated above, it just felt entirely out of step with the rest of s12. In the hands of a capable writer, that could’ve been an entertaining and believable episode. But what we were served lacked any of the finesse and character development we’ve grown accustomed to.

Pro tip for writers: You have to make the plot actually fit the characters you’re writing for. This episode is an excellent example of how NOT to do that... >.>

[merzelifestyle]

Where To Find All Those Secret Nuances of Etiquette - Meet Holly Holden

Living in a home with an interior setting that you love really is a recipe for creating a comfortable and elegant lifestyle.  The beautiful things that surround your home, and ultimately your life, really make a difference in how you feel in your environment.   

This is true whether designing for your home or hosting an event.  As a business owner, I know one thing for sure; paying attention to all the little nuances in a social situation, whether planning a wedding or styling a dinner party, can make a difference to the success of your event. 

How to set an elegant table, create the perfect dimension to a centerpiece, or where to put each member of your party when sitting for dinner all make a difference. These are all the small details that often are overlooked, but if included, bring your event to the next level. 

""classic old-school interior design, like good manners, never goes out of style ""  -- Holly Holden

A few months back, I sat down with Holly Holden at her historic Federal house, Fox Hall, c. 1803, in Farmington, Connecticut.  She has had a lifelong career as an international interior designer, author, speaker, and an Emmy nominated TV Host and Producer. I have admired her accomplishments for some time now and I was looking forward to meeting with her.

Amongst her many accomplishments, what really caught my eye was her YouTube channel and newsletter, Mummy's Monday Manners, Lessons for Lovely Living. In this newsletter, she shares tips about etiquette and classic design, unwritten codes of etiquette and faux pas that we all should be aware of in social situations. I have been receiving her weekly MMM newsletters for some time now, and since I work as a lifestyle host and designer, I couldn’t wait to talk in person to learn more about her.

When we met, Holly greeted me in her gorgeous grand foyer filled with beautiful personal family memories and lovely antiques collected through the years.  The elegant interior of Fox Hall is classically decorated in gorgeous colors and textures that are warm and inviting.  One can instantly tell that each piece of carefully collected artwork is as special as the next and has a story behind it.  We sat and visited while having proper tea and biscuits. My kind of late morning treat!

I instantly liked Holly and enjoyed my visit since we had much in common; love of family, hosting parties, beautiful linens, gardening and a strong work ethic that has spanned decades. She is an intelligent and creative businesswoman and a warm and engaging person.

I never had this blog in mind when visiting Holly, but as I grew to know her more, I thought that my followers, and others who read this blog, would benefit from her expert advice, just as I have. As you know, I try to take the mystique out of creating beautiful designs when entertaining or styling for your home, and Holly does it brilliantly. She has so much information from working internationally as an interior designer and is happy to share all that she knows with you.

Some of Holly’s publications

She has appeared on HGTV: Interiors by Design, national magazines and show houses.

She created and hosts the television series You Are Cordially Invited. It recently received a nomination for a NATAS Emmy Award. The show features masterpiece houses and advice for decorating. More episodes are currently in development.

Holly published her first book in 2013, The Pretty and Proper Living Room, and will be coming out with her next book, Holly Holden: Pearls of Palm Beach: A Private Peek at 8 Elegant Timeless & Tailored Houses, this year.

She has a YouTube channel and a newsletter, Mummy's Monday Manners, about the secret nuances of etiquette.

Here are some of my favorite MMM Newsletters!

For a stunning serving platter, do you know the secret touch?

Do you know THE secret, perfect PARTY PUNCH?

Party time! Cheers to linen cocktail napkins

Holly and MMM are now partnering and rewarding ambassadors who encourage others to sign up for her newsletter. MMM Ambassadors are rewarded with new merchandise, exclusive content, one-on-one calls with Holly, and more.

MMM Ambassadors who sign up 10 new subscribers will receive 2 linen cocktail napkins, as pictured above. Aren’t they adorable?

1. Send your friends this sign up form by copying and pasting it to them: https://bit.ly/39HhNEg 2. After filling in their name and email, the last question on the form will ask: “What is the name of the MMM Ambassador who reached out to you?” Make sure they write your name, otherwise it won’t count!

3. They will email you once they learn that 10 new subscribers have signed up and given you credit!

For every new 10 who subscribe and give you credit, you will receive an additional 2 linen napkins. There is no limit.

And finally, Holly just announced the release of her next product, Holly Holden’s Private Peek: Darling Details and Interior Design. This is a series of short but sweet, Private Peek feature videos where she shares her timeless wisdom about classic interior design.

To access these videos click on this link below:

Private Peek Videos - Classic Interior Design

Holly LOVES to teach others about classic interior design and elegance while living in a stylish comfortable setting. Her entire business is about living and designing around a refined comfortable lifestyle. Her mission is to teach others about the touches that make an interior elegant, comfortable, timeless, yet unpretentious.

To learn more about Holly Holden, click on the link below

hollyholden.com

As with everything I post on my blogs, please feel free to comment, or if you have any questions, please email me through my contact page. I welcome it anytime!

Design with your heart™️

Happy entertaining my friends!

Mary

"May your home be a place where friends meet, family gathers, and love grows. "  -- Anonymous

[writinggeisha]

Writing:  How to Describe a Room I’ve noticed lately in the stats that people have been actively searching for “how to describe a room.” Even though I had done a writing prompt that called for using the description of a room, I never did go over the particulars of describing locations.  So for anybody looking for some specific answers, here are my thoughts on describing interior settings, for fiction and prose.

First and foremost, you got to ask yourself, what importance is the room or setting to the story or characters? If the room is only there for a brief passing scene, it may just suffice to say “so-and-so went into the broom closet.  It was dark, cramped, and loaded with brooms.” That may be all you need.

For more significant settings, where you really do want to paint the picture in the readers’ heads and firmly establish a sense of space or ambiance, then of course you’ll want to dig into more details.  The key issue here is that you don’t want to overdo it.  Unless you’re typing out an architectural report or something, there’s no real need for a reader to understand the full dimensions of the space, or what the composition of the walls are, or anything technical like that.  You will want to cover the overall impression of space, color, mood, atmosphere, furnishings, props, and anything else, as long as it’s distinctive, relevant, and contributes to the story or image in some way.

The objects in a room - furniture and stuff - may or may not factor into your scene.  If you say that people are in the living room, chances are that the reader will automatically populate the room with their own idea of what a living room will have:  likely a sofa, a TV, etc.  So there may not be a need to describe what furniture is in that room, especially if such furnishings are not going to be actively used.  On the other hand, if the characters are going to use something, it may be necessary to establish such things early in the scene, so the reader can understand that the given thing exists and the characters aren’t just making it materialize.  For example, if characters are in a room with a gun on the table, and one of the characters grabs the gun and uses it, it’ll help to explain right away that there is indeed a gun on the table.  Otherwise, it’ll sound like the gun just magically appeared on the table.  It may not be necessary for some things (grabbing a knife from the kitchen would be self-explanatory), but this kind of thing should be set up for everything else that isn’t so obvious.

You’ll also want to describe things if they’re not usually associated with a given place.  For example, in Robert Heinlein’s Stranger in a Strange Land, some living rooms had expensive lawns in them, with actual soil and grass growing in the middle of the room.  It was important to describe them, because the characters used the indoor lawns, and even commented on them.  Later in the story, one of these lawns was ruined.  It serviced the story (plus, an average reader will not associate grass in a common living room).  For sci-fi and fantasy stories, where settings are imagined and re-imagined more vividly, more description may be necessary to paint a picture of a futuristic or otherworldly setting in the readers’ heads.

Another thing to consider will be what the items of a room, or its decor and layout, says about the characters.  If the room is messy, you can conclude that the character is disorganized, and thus you find another way to show a character trait.  Or, if the room has expensive art, you can infer that a character has refined tastes (or maybe he just pretends to).  The possibilities on this level are limitless; if a detail is relevant to a character, you will want to capitalize on it.

In the end, however, all of this will depend on your own personal writing style.  Different writers will write settings in different ways.  Wordy writers like Stephen King or JRR Tolkein could spend pages and pages talking about the stuff in their rooms; James Patterson never seems to describe any of his settings, especially if they’re common places.  Really, the best advice I could give is to simply approach the scene naturally, and write out the first things that come to mind.  If nothing comes to mind, just proceed with the scene in the given setting with sparse details; chances are that you don’t need details anyway.  If you’re compelled to say more about the setting, then try indulging in such details as your imagination allows, and see what comes out.  It should be a natural occurrence; if you’re stuck on describing a place, it might be best to just skip ahead, write the next scene, and go back in the rewriting session to see if you really need to add anything more.

And when it comes to your own writing style, there is no set way to describe a place.  It’s not like you go through a room step-by-step to introduce the walls, floors, furnishings, etc to a reader.  If anything, this will come off as dry, long, and uninteresting.  If you have to explain every little thing about a room, it would be better to break up the exposition with action or dialogue; you have to keep the story moving, and lingering on interior design may stall plot progression.   You also don’t want to make the language describing the room overly dry or overly flowery; just use your natural narration.  

In summary…

Do:

Keep it simple.

Talk about colors, patterns, decor, and unique architectural details, if they’re relevant.

Talk about furnishings and props, especially if characters use them.

Talk about anything in the room if it reveals something about the characters within.

Talk about space.

Talk about unique details that readers may not usually associate with a given place (especially for sci-fi and fantasy works, where the settings are purposefully different anyway).

Describe it naturally with your own personal writing style and sensibilities.

Don’t:

Get technical or overly-explicit.

Divulge in unnecessary details.

Tell about room’s atmosphere or impression; show it instead.

Overthink or overdo things.

Dump details in one long paragraph.

Describe things in a dull, dry, choppy, or uninteresting manner; use your natural narrative voice.

Describe things that the reader will already assume for a given place, especially if such things don’t contribute to the story.

For some examples, here are some excerpts from my own projects, with varying levels of description (not to mention varying levels of skill and nuance).  I think you’ll find that I’m very light in details, and just give just enough to keep things flowing.  Chances are that I may break my own rules above (I’ve always been pretty bad at “showing not telling”), because it’s as much of a learning process for me as it is for everybody else.

From Rider of the White Horse, Chapter 25

I wrote this story as far back as high school; I’ve always felt this was a very amateurish story with a weak writing style, but it’s serviceable and got the job done.  The description here is pretty bland, doesn’t say much, and quite understated.

Kurt walked towards the old man, and he followed him through the ruins of Tokyo to a squat abandoned building a quarter of a mile away.  There, the old man led Kurt into a relatively clean room with cupboards, a single mattress on the floor, and a low table.   The old man lit a candle that was on the table with a makeshift lighter.  The candle illuminated the room, revealing the old man’s face to Kurt.

The old man went to the corner of the room, where a tub of water sat idle.  Kurt noticed that the man rigged a purification system over the tub, allowing him access to relatively clean water.   The man took some water and some leaves he had stored in a cupboard.   Then he prepared two cups of tea, working diligently with trembling old hands.  Kurt sat at the low table and watched as the old man prepared the tea, observing the man’s technique as he mixed ingredients and stirred them in wooden cups.

From Perfectly Inhuman, Chapter 3

This is one of my most recent works.  I did take the time to describe this area in bigger detail, to give the reader a lavish and futuristic picture.  It reflects on the power and wealth of the Mayor and his government.  Hopefully, you’ll get the impression of wide-open spaces, luxury, and cleanliness.

At the topmost floor, the city became a mere map beneath Mary.  The doors opened, and the guards pushed her out.

She found herself in a large lobby.   The floors were made of colored tiles arranged in jagged patterns, and the walls were made of glass, revealing additional views of the city and the mountains to the east.  A frosted glass partition separated the lobby from a private office.  Silk banners hung from the ceiling.   Polished stone pedestals held golden and silver statues portraying nude men and women. ��Everything in the room was rich and lavish; Mary found herself awed, and envious that she never had a place so luxurious.

The guards guided her through a set of glass doors in the frosted glass partition, and they passed into a wide open office space.  The office looked much like the lobby, only instead of statues and banners there were holograms and display screens.   Contrasting with the bright floors and the bright exterior view, there was a black desk on one end of the room, made of a rare dark organic wood.

From Ouroboros:  Demon-Blood, Chapter 11

This is one story I’ve worked with on and off; I’ve been a little wordier with this series of stories than with most others, to try and immerse the audience in a more detailed fantasy world.  Hopefully, you’ll get the feeling of seeing something different and fantastic (and possibly wicked) with this segment.  Note that the term Svartálfar comes from ancient Norse myth, referring to a race of Dark Elves.

In the middle of the woods, the Svartálfar had constructed a large settlement.  It was surrounded by a thick wooden wall, studded with huge wooden thorns and metal spikes.   The area around the wall was cleared of all vegetation, so that it could not be scaled with nearby trees.  There were trees on the other side of the wall, which had platforms and turrets for guards to stand watch on.  The settlement’s gate was a thick wooden door with iron supports; it swung open for us as we approached.

Inside the settlement, the Svartálfar used most of the trees as buildings; they were all hollowed-out to serve as homes, stairwells, storage, and stores.  They also had small wooden shacks and huts in between the trees.  Some buildings were also constructed on the sides of trees and on their branches.  There were scores of elves bustling around, trading with their craftsmen, mentoring their children, and practicing with their weapons.  When I entered the town, they all stopped to gawk at me; I met their gazes with my own look of contempt.

In the middle of the settlement, there was a larger tree, surrounded by a wooden wall with turrets all along it and a single gateway.  I was led through the gate toward the base of the tree, which had an expansive hall jutting out of its bark.  Passing into the hall, I stepped across a polished stone floor; the hall’s curved walls were ornately carved with elfin runes and mosaics.  Twisted pillars held up the ceiling.  At the end of the hall was the throne of the Svartálfar king, Lord Hygric.  It was a large throne ordained with pieces of gold, silver, gems, and there were skulls hanging above it.

[adrian-paul-botta]

Lillian Gish is a very considerable person. She is, furthermore, a lady. The word “lady” has become so outmoded as to seem archaic. Certain people do exist, however, to whom it truly applies, and Lillian is one of them. She is considerate and therefore good-mannered. Her values are good, her humor is good, and she has great good sense. All this excelence is flavored by a charming romanticism on one hand and an astringent sense of the practical on the other. These qualities are supported by a disciplined will, good health, and unflagging enthusiasm and energy, not only for her work but also for all the enjoyable things that life has to offfer. Finally she is and has always been a ravishingly beautiful woman.

Professionally she minds her own business, and film and theater gossip leaves her cold. She turns gently aside, without comment or reproof, from the failings and excesses of those who have attained more recent and inflated reputations. The prevalent sloth, bad manners, extravagance, exhibitionism, caprice and vanity of some stars she finds a curious but uninteresting phenomenon. If questioned about any particular example of a bad behavior or egomania among her colleagues she will discuss only the talent of the person in question and the dangers to which such excess expose it.

Lillian herself is not a vain person, although she believes that actors and actresses should guard their health and their appearance, the better to exercise their metier. Her early training and success as an idealized heroine incline her to cleanliness and prettiness, but she will follow most conscientiously the intentions of any director she respects. It must be admitted, however, that she is a little out of sympathy with the modern taste for comedy of stygian black and for drama that excludes the romantic in relationships in favor of the tortured, the twisted and the perverse.

As a professional she is impeccable. She loves her work and is always ready to tackle the daily responsabilities of whatever role, big or small, she has undertaken. Having contributed in no small degree to the early development of the art of film making under the aegis of D.W. Griffith, and having enjoyed several decades of great success as a film and stage star, she is nevertheless ready and eager to discuss the smallest detail and nuance of whatever role she now accepts.

In Dahomey, where we were filming The Comedians, I remember a day on which Lillian had a particularly difficult scene to play. The temperature was 130 degrees, and there was no shade – not a tree, not a house, not a cafe in which to take occasional refuge. Among the things that Lillian had to endure was being pushed in the face and thrown to the ground (a ground covered with sharp pebbles). As the sequence involved four cars, including a hearse from which a coffin had to be forcibly ejected, the work was slow, and the neccessary detail of rehearsing considerable. Lillian remained calm, cool and alert throughout the long day. Richard Burton, who was also in the scene, finally approached me and courteously suggested that the heat and excessive physical work might be too much for a lady of Lillian’s delicacy and that perhaps we should stop work for the day. Naturally, I put the suggestion to Lillian. “Nonsense,” she replied. “We are here to work, and we haven’t completed the scene. Anyway you need the sun – and it will be just as hot tomorrow. I prefer to work until sundown.” And that is exactly what she did. At 5:45 P.M. she finished the scene and gave a fine performance in it.

We all then drove back to headquarters. Lillian arrived at my villa later, looking fresh and radiant in a charming evening dress suitable to the climate, and we dined together. We discussed the theater, African politics, and the religious aspects of Graham Greene’s literary work. At 11:30 she retired, saying that she was looking forward to meeting everyone on the set next day – at 6:30 A.M. The evening demonstrated to me that a dedicated, disciplined actress is by no means inevitably a bore. Lillian would be equally at home with the Beatles and with the Archbishop of Canterbury. And they would equally appreciate her.

Peter Glenville

(The Movies, Mr. Griffith and Me)

  The Comedians – 1967

Director: Peter Glenville

Writers: Graham Greene (novel and screenplay)

There are also some hilarious scenes involving the Vegetarian candidate for U.S. President (Paul Ford) and his wife (brilliantly played by Lillian Gish). And there are some well-photographed location shots showing voodoo ceremonies and all that. The atmosphere of the Caribbean is invoked convincingly, if to no particular purpose, and there are semi-controversial statements about U.S. policy in Latin America (“Rebels only become Communist when the Yankees insist”). The movie tries to be serious and politically significant, and succeeds only in being tedious and pompous. Still, you have to hand it to Liz and Dick: For them to make a movie attacking Papa Doc Duvalier’s dictatorship took even more courage than when Senator Dirksen defended the marigold. Richard Burton … Brown Elizabeth Taylor … Martha Pineda Alec Guinness … Major H. O. Jones Peter Ustinov … Ambassador Manuel Pineda Paul Ford … Smith Lillian Gish … Mrs. Smith Georg Stanford Brown … Henri Philipot Roscoe Lee Browne … Petit Pierre Gloria Foster … Mrs. Philipot James Earl Jones … Dr. Magiot Zakes Mokae … Michel Douta Seck … Joseph Raymond St. Jacques … Captain Concasseur Cicely Tyson … Marie Therese

Lillian would be equally at home with the Beatles and with the Archbishop of Canterbury. Lillian Gish is a very considerable person. She is, furthermore, a lady. The word "lady" has become so outmoded as to seem archaic.