#. Some of the anti-voting posts on here are starting to sound really weird

[bensiskos]

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[thecrimsonjaguar]

A Short List of Adventure Time AUs

So I got a google doc of adventure time aus I’ve made over the past two or three years. Here are some of my favorites (and also the ones I came back to and edited)

If you’ve got ideas for an au or ideas to add onto the preexisting ones I’ve got here, please tell me! I’m always up for some au discussion. 

1.) Jermaine AU: Jermaine comes to live at the treehouse after his house blows up. This, unlike canon, happens rather early in season 3. The rest of the series mainly stays the same, except this time there's three brothers instead of two. He's a kinda anxious dude with demon hunting expertise and a painting hobby. He sometimes wonders if he made Dad disappointed by letting all his work explode. Finn and Jake help him out, and he helps them. Despite this, Jermaine is the only one with a brain, and Finn and Jake share exactly one (1) braincell that they trade every so often. Jermaine is tired. (Jermaine is the only one who tries to clean regularly, and he's also the one to keep Neptr, Ancient Psychic Tandem War Elephant, and a few others company. He's a bit of real wisdom the early series Finn and Jake needed.

2.) Melted Ice AU: Mid season two, IK is hit with something that de-ages him. He turns six. Maybe this mystery de-aging thing blows up the top of the ice mountain, who knows. Maybe he wakes up in the snow, with no memory of how he got there or why. No memory of the last one thousand years. Finn and Jake don't know about his backstory since that happens in season three. Simon is carried by a snowman out of the ice kingdom where he breaks down in the plains. Finn, of course, finds him and is ecstatic to meet another human. Completely missing the fact that this small child is, in fact, the Ice King, Finn declares to help this boy no matter what. That promise soon becomes difficult when people hear about the second human in Ooo, and whatever effect that's keeping him young starts to wear off. (Marceline comes to visit and has a heart attack)

3.) Adventure Falls AU: AT x GF baybee!! Seventeen year old Stanley Pines hops on the Stan O' War and sets sail when he's kicked out. Unfortunately, that boat is nowhere near sea worthy, and all it takes for him to go overboard is one sudden (magical) storm. But, miraculously, Stan doesn't die. He washes up on Ooo, the island of misfits. Where there's daddy issues galore and punching things and getting gold is a legitimate career. He's found on the shore by none other than Finn, who asks if he's okay and if a dungeon adventure would soothe his worries. Stan accepts, because that sounds awesome, and they maybe date. For the next ten years, Stanley is a professional hero. He travels with Finn, he lives in a tower with tons of gold, he's respected, adored, and has made a family for himself. Ooo has a habit of forcing traumatic therapy onto to people, so Stan gets (read: is forced) to work his issues out. And then, somehow, he gets a postcard from his brother.

4.) Young Pups AU: Jake's kids grow up fast- but not that fast. He stays with lady for a few episodes being Dad and when the Pups are old enough, go visit Finn and Jermaine. Also Jermaine is there when the pups are born that always bothered me in canon like what the fuck. This whole AU results in Jake the Dad being a better father than in canon, because he actually has time to make mistakes and learn from them. He sometimes shapeshifts into one of those baby carriers but suited for five kids instead of one. Finn and Jermaine fight for best uncle privileges. Finn is considerably more awesome but Jermaine's got magic junk and juicy stories about Jake. So far the votes are: FINN: Jake Jr, T.V.  JERMAINE: Kim Kil Whan, Charlie. Viola remains undecided.

4.) Evilgreen AU: Evergreen was evil. His idea to make the crown to stop the comet was actually a cover story to take control of all the elements and freeze everything. Of course the same thing happens here as it did in canon, Gunther gets the crown and wishes to *be* evergreen. This is bad. Very bad, so bad in fact, that things get FUnKy. A couple eons later, Simon gets the crown as per canon, and then things start to slide downhill. Since the crown is significantly worse, Simon tries to get rid of it. No amount of magic pull is going to get him to put on the eldritch hat. It teleports back. When things go to shit, the crown tells him he's got two options: He can either live, or he can live unwillingly. This all coalesces in super angst and mild horror as Simon has to fight off evil urges and somehow keep both he and Marceline safe. Things start looking up, though, when he summons Hunson Abadeer.

5.) Nightmare Therapy AU: Simon, now himself post canon, has some funky nightmares. Problem is: he's due for a visit from the cosmic owl due to some mystical bureaucratic bs. If that were to happen, Simon's dreams of Golb and Orgalorg and the world ending and everyone dying and maze would come true, without the veil of metaphoric junk dreams are known for (also due to bureaucratic bs). So, Simon gets a dream therapist. An OC, probably, that would fight off his nightmares when they came and talk to him about his issues.

6.) High School AU: Except they're all still magic and crap. Finn's a jock that's part of the LDnD club(Literally Dungeons and Dragons), Jake's got a job at a pancake place and hosts the Card Wars clubs on Wednesdays, Jermaine's in college and their parents were still detectives/demon hunters. PB is preppy/nerdy girl with weird fucking family and is absolutely a mad scientist. Marceline is still a demon/vamp (vampire biker gang, they all died, deaths pending) and her uncle is Simon. Simon is a history teacher whose ex wife might be an eldritch abomination (the students wonder, but there are no answers)((simon says cryptic things every so often that are the subject of much ridicule, but he's a nice guy)). Ooo High has all of the AT characters in some shape or form. Tree trunks is the lunchlady, Mr Pig is a janitor. Lemongrab is just there. LSP(Q?) is a teacher because that's hilarious. Hunson is dead along with Marceline's mom because fuck hunson. Magic Man is a hobo that snuck onto campus and can't be chased off (his brother is the superintendent, Glob). there's a lot more but that's for a different word doc.

7.) Back to the Future AU: So PB fucks around with time travel, right? For science. She gets sent back in time a thousand years, before the war. Now, she's a pink lady who can shoot jelly beans from her hands, of course needs to lay low. And of course she needs to get home, but she's in a Futurama situation where she only has one type of time machine; the one that can go into the past. Not to mention her own time machine got busted on her way there, so she's double screwed. But, she remembers something. There is an individual (two, actually) that knows about time travel in this time period. She knows him, and he's likely to help her if she plays her card right. She needs to find Simon and get back to her own time, preferably without dooming herself in the process. (perhaps she tries to steal the notes Simon has, and Simon's completely oblivious, except Betty can smell trouble from a mile away and immediately notices some pink woman trying to steal books and she goes ham. Perhaps she goes ham in such a way that Simon doesn't notice. Perhaps this goes on for seven acts.)

8.) Bread and Butter AU: Bella Noche during the episode Betty creates a huge black cube that engulfs all of Wizard City. This box acts as a cage and prevents Wizards from escaping the magic purge. Simon is unable to bring Betty back from the past, and he's fading fast. In a desperate attempt to stop things from escalating, Simon chugs a bottle of anti-magic like a fucking god. He gets through the cube that surrounds Bella Noche and knocks their lights out. He passes out, and when he comes to, the anti-magic he consumed as merged with him. This is because of a simple rule: Magic sticks to magic, anti-magic sticks to anti-magic. And since humans have always had just a little bit of anti -magic present within them, humans and anti-magic go together like bread and butter (badumtish) ((I have actually written a fanfic about this, you can find it here))

9.) Swapped AU: Through various shenanigans Ice King's and Magic Man's powers gets swapped. These shenanigans somehow land them in space as well. This happens before Magic Man's trial. The swapping of their powers results in Simon getting his memory back. It also gives Magic Man the Ice Crown, unfortunately for him though, it seems to hate him. Simon's glad to back, but quickly realizes one issue: He's still crazy. So the pair try to make it back to Ooo. MM needs his powers to swap himself with some other shmuck so he doesn't croak when his trial comes, but Simon's made it clear he isn't giving his powers up without a fight. The pair starts off rocky, neither trusting the other, but space trouble forces them to work together. Simon's a nice enough guy he wouldn't leave someone to die and MM really needs Simon alive so it works out. A weird friendship forms, and they learn get along. Just a couple of crazy space wizards. Then the crown is destroyed. MM is freed from the crown's control, and he's freed from magic. He gets his sanity back, just in time for his trial.

that’s all I’ve got for now!

[anexplanationofunfortunateevents]

this is an alarmist post

This post might sound alarmist because I don’t know the respectable, non-alarmist way to put this. He’s going full final-days-in-the-Fuhrerbunker. I want to be alarmist. We need to be alarmed.

On one level, I’m pretty sure you know this. You can probably see a vague reference to “what happened in Portland” and know exactly what the writer means. Unidentified little green men in military-style fatigues deployed against peaceful protesters. Protesters kidnapped off the streets in “proactive arrests.” ordered by someone illegally acting as the head of DHS. Journalists attacked. Middle-aged women beaten and tear-gassed. The mayor of Portland tear-gassed. It was, of course, worse than it looked, and only the most telegenic of concurrent power grabs.

But it’s really hard to stay at the appropriate level of alarm for even three hours – and we need to stay there for the next three months. It’s exhausting no matter what, and nearly all of our current information environment makes it even more difficult than it needs to be.

Most of what the mainstream media has to say about the election isn’t reporting so much as it is fanfiction. Characters with familiar names and recognizable faces feature in an alternative universe where “normal” political forces (which were defunct ten years ago) apply. Sniping about “messaging,” pathologically boring lectures about “enthusiasm” – it would be annoying anti-Democratic concern-trolling in a world where a free and fair election could be taken for granted. In the real world of powerful and accelerating anti-democratic threats, it is both dangerous and bizarre, like dumping a fifth of vodka into a Super Soaker and trying to use it to put out a brush fire.

The mainstream conversation is so disorienting that it’s understandable why there are also a fair amount of influential progressive commentators who have burrowed themselves into the reverse narrative. It doesn’t matter what we do, Trump is just going to steal the election anyway; it doesn’t matter if he loses, he’s going to refuse to leave anyway. A subset of these fatalists swing all the way around to conventional Pundit Brain: Trump has already blown up all the rules of democratic politics because Democrats aren’t using the One Weird Trick that would make them good at democratic politics!*

Before jumping down the rabbit hole of whether these narratives are true, it’s important to emphasize that they are not constructive. We are in a crisis. In a crisis, you need to help people understand that something abnormal is happening AND that there is something they can do to make things better. Communicating to people that things are fine, as the mainstream horserace normal politics model does, isn’t helpful, because it helps people rationalize the false but comforting belief that everything is fine. Communicating to people that things are hopeless, as the doom-mongering counternarrative does, is even less helpful. If you’re acting normal about something abnormal, there’s at least the off-chance you’ll get lucky and unwittingly bluff your way through the short- and medium-term. But if you’re constantly getting the message that you’re screwed no matter what, it’s human nature to either a) go into denial and double down on an unproductive response, which is irrational but understandable or b) get cynical and give up, which is an entirely rational response to a situation that actually is hopeless.

Trump is already trying to steal the 2020 election. He has help from the henchmen he has put in charge of important federal agencies and from the white-shoe lifers in the Republican legal establishment. Anything you can imagine he might do, you should assume he has at least considered it. He will consider things that would never even occur to you.

He hasn’t succeeded yet. He can be stopped with overwhelming turnout. We know this because of the 2018 midterms. Autocrats who are successfully smothering a democracy do not allow the opposition party to win partial or full control in regional governments, take over half the federal legislature, and gain a foothold in the presidential line of succession. That’s not how autocracy works. If you come across a commentator who is under the impression that a burgeoning dictatorship just gives away that kind of power for the lulz, consider taking that person’s opinions on the subject with a grain of salt.

Thanks to the 2018 midterms, House Democrats have been able to foil some of Trump’s schemes and warn the public about others. Even with Individual 1’s desperate thrashing at the intelligence agencies, we’re getting a lot more specific information about Russian attacks on the election than we were this time in 2016 from the Obama administration.

One more important thing we learned in 2018: just because Trump would do something, doesn’t mean he will. Here’s the Once and Future Speaker a few weeks after reclaiming her title:

At least Trump “didn’t declare the election illegal,” Pelosi said. “We had a plan for that” — though really, she acknowledged, the only workable plan was “to win big. Had it been four or five seats, he would’ve tried to dismantle it.” In his news conference the day after the midterms, Trump spoke respectfully of Pelosi….

The Spectacularly Failed New York Times buried the lead as usual, but there are a few really important points packed in here. Democrats did, in fact, have a plan for that, which you’re going to need to remind yourself if you try to follow political commentary in the next few months. For whatever reason, a surprising number of supposedly anti-Trump writers are  eager to undermine Trump’s opposition with false claims that Democrats are bumbling naifs who in 2020 still haven’t realized that Trump might not respect the results of an election.** This demoralizing premise is, as you can tell from the Wayback Machine link, not true, but for some reason it remains a popular lie, so it’s worth debunking.

More importantly, we didn’t know about the plan until afterward because they didn’t need it. Trump has blinked before, so there’s no reason to assume he won’t blink again. We shouldn’t assume he will do the same thing in 2020 that he did in 2018, because it’s a different situation! Just that people who have assumed Donald Trump will act in a completely different way than he has in the past usually end up with egg on their faces.

My two cents – AND THIS IS JUST MY OPINION SO YOU CAN SKIP IT – is that any kind of post-election autocratic power grab would probably need decisive action from Trump within days, maybe even hours, of polls closing. That, in turn, would require Trump to absorb the narcissistic injury of a loss immediately, which he has been psychologically incapable of doing for the first 74 years of his life. Remember, he didn’t have to come to terms with the curb-stomping he received in the midterms right away. At first he could tell himself that Republicans holding onto the Senate (by the skin of their teeth when they should by all rights have swamped it, but whatever) represented a “split decision” and even a moral victory for him, so he could afford to go into, like, con man autopilot mode and try to charm “Nancy.” Everyone else adjusted to the Democratic victory the next day, and the next night, people got into the streets warning him not to try any bullshit. It was only after bigger districts finished counting and mail-in ballots were counted that it sunk in for him how badly he had lost and what the consequences would be. Then he soothed himself by shutting down the government indefinitely, which he seemed to feel was a display of his power – until “Nancy” pantsed and dog-walked him so he had to slink off and pretend it never happened.

If an election which was more or less as legitimate as the 2016 election (questionable but not Belarus) were held today, I think the most likely result would be a scenario a lot like the midterms: East Coast states make it clear which way the wind is blowing to most people, but Trump goes to bed at 3 AM thinking he’s close enough to fight it out in court. Over the next couple of weeks the mail-in ballots get opened, Miami and Philadelphia finish counting, and the real numbers start penetrating even his toxic bubble. Eventually someone reminds him that his armed Secret Service detail can escort him off the premises no matter what he does, so he loses what little nerve he has and skips Biden’s inauguration to go golfing at Mar a Lago. Or maybe Sochi.

But again, that is not a guarantee or even a prediction. The FACT is that anything can happen in the next three months, and Trump and his goons are putting a lot of effort into ensuring that everyone does happen. I spelled out my opinion of what seems most likely at the moment because it can get really easy to dwell on the worst-case scenario, which leads to fatalism and inaction. The least-bad scenario is actually more plausible than it’s been for the last few years, if we motivate ourselves to get it done. We can’t waste all our time and energy thinking about what he’s going to do, because we need to think about what we’re going to do. Voting is the core issue as always, but it helps to be more concrete.

If your state has early in-person voting, and if you can do so safely, vote in-person as soon as you can. Every state’s vote by mail infrastructure was going to be strained this year before these dirtbags decided to sabotage the postal service. If you can cast your vote early, you can help make the lines a little shorter on Election Day while leaving vote by mail resources for people who need them.

If you are a person who needs vote by mail resources for whatever reason, use them! Request your ballot now. Fill it out and return it as soon as you get it. You might not have to mail it back – your county may have drop boxes, or maybe someone can bring it to the local elections office for you. If that’s a safe option for you, please take advantage of it. If it’s not a safe option, mail your ballot back as soon as possible. You’re not helping anyone from the ICU.

If you and the people you live with are relatively low risk, or if you’ve survived COVID and your health care provider thinks you have immunity for the next few months, consider volunteering as a poll worker. Usually a lot of poll workers are retirees, who are by definition in a high-risk group. If enough of them decide to sit this year out – and that’s the smart, responsible choice – then polling places end up closing, which helps Republican voter suppression by making the lines longer. The more volunteers your area has, the more polls they’ll have open, which makes it that much easier to let people vote quickly and at a safe distance from each other.

This last one isn’t directly about voting, but it’s still pretty important: get used to pushing back on bullshit. There already is another effort to drive down turnout by inundating voters with disinformation. Last time we weren’t ready; this time, we have no excuse.

*Avoiding sources because this stuff is toxic. If you think I’m making this up because you haven’t seen it anywhere, good.

**Look, nobody*** is more sympathetic to The Men and their psychological frailties than me, but seriously, guys, some of you need to log the hell off for a few days.

***For certain non-traditional values of “nobody.”

[gleefail]

Glee Memories: 1x10 Ballad

A long, long time ago, as Glee was approaching graduation in Season 3, I found myself nostalgic with some rare free time on my hands. So I decided to rewatch the series from the beginning and jot down some memories, discrepancies that have arisen since, fave quotes, tally solos - all that good stuff, strictly for shits and giggles.

8 years later (eek!) and once more I find myself with an unexpected abundance of free time. With so many revisiting or being newly introduced to the show between binge watching during Quarantine and all the tragedy that has surrounded the show since it went off the air, I figured I’d finish what I started. And by finish, I mean go through the end of S3. Cause I truly cannot acknowledge what happened after that. Except for 5B.

Kicking this off by reposting the first 15 episodes I already went through. Enjoy!

1x10 Ballad “Ok, who can tell me what a ballad is?” “It’s a male duck”

ok, I disagree with Schue’s definition of a ballad. “Stories set to music” – um…isn’t that every song? Or is it just in musicals that it’s supposed to be, lol?

“Looks like my weekly letter to the Ohio showchoir committee FINALLY paid off” and the look she gives Puck. Haha. This Rachel Berry is funny. Cause they’re letting us laugh at her right along with her. Not asking us to put her on a pedestal and/or take her seriously all the damn time. I’m not even gonna get started. I’m watching this post Props/Nationals, and though I didn’t think it could, my hate has grown. In abundance. Trying to keep it in check. Moving on…

“I bet that duck’s in the hat”

“Matt’s out sick today. He had to go to the hospital cause they found a spider in his ear” Um, ew. Also terrifying. However, humorous nonetheless. And an effort to explain a random absence of a Glee club member. Remember how they used to do that?

Aw, Artie drew Quinn’s name out of the hat. :) 2 seasons later and they’ll get 2 duets (both of which I loooove). Shame they didn’t do it this ep. Romantic or just friends, I ADORE the chemistry with Diana and Kevin. I really wanted to see more of that. :(

omg. Kurt’s face when Finn pulls his name. Adorable. Also, I love that Finn is not cool with it but a year later Sam is totes fine. Maybe that’s just cause I love dudes that are comfortable enough in their sexuality to do things that d-bags in high school might tease them about being gay for. Or maybe that’s just cause I love Sam Evans. Couldn’t tell ya. Except yeah, I totes could. It’s cause I wants a Trouty Mouth to call my very own. *lesigh*

“other asian” Ha!

Brittana!

“The fates talked, Mr. Schue” #BlessFinnsHeart

I love the voice-overs during Endless Love: “Screw him if he thinks he’s taking the Diana Ross part from me” “I love the days when I wear no underwear” “I never noticed how nice Rachel’s butt is…oh crap! I think Quinn knows I’m staring at it!”

I also love the facial expressions of Rachel and Mr. Schue here. Hilarious.

Haha – Brad’s like “wtf is happening?”

“Crap – she looks crazy right now!” hahahahahaha

Because of Rachel’s realization through this song, it means Lea Michele can’t squint nearly as much. Wow. It’s like a whole new Rachel with her eyes open while she’s singing.

Artie’s face after the duet. It’s like someone stepped in dog poop.

Ok, Charlotte Ross was in a show in the 90’s I used to watch that, if I recall, failed miserably but nonetheless had a brief stint as my guilty pleasure show. And I can’t remember what it is for the life of me and keep forgetting to look when I have access to google it. Anyone?

“I don’t want you to lift a finger for me. I’m your wife!” Oh wow. So unhealthy. So republican. Soooooo some parts of Ohio. These are the folks that voted for Bush. :/ Yep, I’m still ashamed to be from Ohio when I think of that election.

Suzy. Pepper. Yes. I love this actress. Bright and Hannah were my OTP on Everwood. I miss them.

“You knew it was me just by the sound of my breath. That’s so romantic.”

“Listen, you little psycho, this is Will’s wife, and if I don’t get enough sleep my anti-depressants won’t work, and then I’ll go crazy and I’ll kill you.” Oh Terri. So maternal and loving.

Suzy Pepper is sobbing to More Than Words. That was my jam back in the day!

“Your lashing out at me is fantastically compelling…and….inappropriate.”

“Thank God I never missed a piano lesson” – really Kurt? Is this the first and only time we’re to believe Kurt can play piano well enough to accompany someone from memory?

Finn singing I’ll Stand By You to a sonogram dvd on his laptop. I have no words. I don’t think I thought it was this weird the first time I watched it.

So Finn’s mom busts him singing to said laptop sonogram dvd…and he doesn’t close the laptop…or stop the dvd…or try to hide the screen. He sits up next to it as she approaches him, almost begging her to see it. I felt the same way then as I do now – it was an opportunity for him to not tell her necessarily but for her to find out anyways and I think he really wanted her to know so he could go to her for help and comfort and to relieve everything he couldn’t deal with about the situation. I’m just sayin’.

Oh old school Carol with her denim and that hair…she’s still such a great mom though. And this actress. My God. She’s amazing.

“You’re wrong, I’m right. I’m smart, you’re dumb.”

“Dude. Impulse control!” haha

“I dunno why I find his stupidity charming. I mean, he’s cheating off a girl who thinks the square root of 4 is rainbows.” #BlessFinnsHeart

Oh Young Girl/Don’t Stand So Close to Me mash-up. I fell in lust with you from the first moment I laid eyes on you.

Seriously. Matthew Morrison is so hot in this mash-up. Yowzah.

“So, Rachel, do you think you understood the message I was trying to get across with that ballad?” “Yes! It means I’m very young and it’s hard for you to stand close to me.”

“You’re a very good performer. He’s very good.”

Finn and Kurt bonding over their lost parents. This is a sweet scene.

“You think I should bring a gun?” #BlessFinnsHeart

“Casserole’s almost ready. Hope you like venison!” Ok. TERRIFYING to come home and find Rachel Berry in an apron, cooking you dinner, in your home.

Hey, remember that time that Rachel literally sang 3 lines of Crush and they released it in its entirety as a single from this episode? Ridonk.

“I found out today that my hamster was pregnant in biology class and I just started weeping!”

Aw, Mercedes and Puck are paired up for duet ballads.

haha. Babygate.

“Finn’s not the father! I am.” People be spilling out their truths to Mercedes y’all.

“Alright, look, you need to get something through your Mohawk real quick: you’re the baby’s daddy. It takes a hell of a lot more to be a father and that role’s already been cast because Quinn chose Finn. You need to accept that and move on cause you have no business messin’ up that girl’s life more than you already have. You need to back off. You owe her at least that much. ”Aw, Mercedes. Laying down tough love. And looking out for Quinn before they were even friends. Man. I love Mercedes.

Oh that’s right – Quinn has an older sister! Why did we never meet her?

“He wears a helmet when he plays, right?” – THAT’S WHAT I’M SAYIN’! #BlessFinnsHeart

“I have to go, they’ll think I’m pooping.” Hehehehe.

omg. So I love this still. Finn is doing karate moves in the bathroom mirror to pump himself up to sing to the Fabrays that Quinn’s pregnant. That is so effing funny. What happened to this Finn?

You’re Having My Baby. Haha. This song is so cheesy. This scene is so uncomfortable.

So Quinn’s parents, unlike Finn, are NOT simple-minded and have figured it out. And it’s terrifying.

“We didn’t even have sex” #BlessFinnsHeart

Quinn’s parents are kicking her out. Well, her dad is and her mom isn’t standing up to him. This is rough. Especially when you realize they’re supposed to be 15. So wrong. Poor Quinn. And her dad just screamed at her that she was a disappointment. Yeah…she’s had to deal with some shit. And in the end, they don’t acknowledge that she did and try to make her out to be the bad guy, and selfish… Way to go, RIB.

Oh good ole Carol, without a moment of hesitationlets Quinn stay with them.

“Honey, you can stay here as long as you want.” Carol’s the best. So glad she found Burt.

“We’re not so different, you and me. We’re both mildly attractive and extremely grating. Love is hard for us. We look for boys we know we can never have. Mr. Schue is a perfect target for our self-esteem issues. He can never reciprocate our feelings which only reinforces the conviction that we’re not worthy of being loved. Trust me. I’m a cautionary tale. You need to find some self-respect, Rachel. Get that mildly attractive groove back.” Suzy Pepper, ladies and gentlemen. Dropping truth bombs.

“There’s some boy out there who’s gonna like you for everything you are, including those parts of you that even you don’t like. Those are gonna be the things about you that he likes the most.” Hmm…might be true. Never thought about this, but I’d say that describes Jesse. But not Finn so much. Maybe recently. But…he has made several comments about her being annoying or controlling as they were dating. And not in a ‘those are my favorite things about her’ kinda way. Just sayin’.

Aw. Kurt seems like he feels really bad about Quinn getting kicked out.

“Open your eyes! I didn’t tell you to close your eyes.” “Is there a cake?” No, there’s no cake!” #BlessFinnsHeart

Lean On Me. Watching this now, with one ep left and it’s graduation…yeah, I’m crying. Dammit, Glee.

haha, Mercedes just kinda pushed past Rachel who was front and center to sing her solo. Probably not intentional but still funny.

Damn, Kevin McHale.

Damn, Amber Riley.

SOLOS: Rachel (1), Will (2), Finn (2), Artie (1), Mercedes (1)

[stolligaseptember]

shenannygans replied to your post “okay, just because i’m literally freaking out over the scope of this...”

I‘d love to read an in depth explanation why it isn‘t real. What I saw so far seems real to me and tbh I‘m really worried.

This is article 13. This is the article that everyone is (apparently) freaking out over.

I personally think that the hysteria that has been spreading is because of a very delicate mix of the far-right and the anti establishment hijacking the American net neutrality movement to push for their own agendas, a misguided SJW culture that’s way too America-centered here on tumblr, and just a general misunderstanding of how the EU works.

(Remember how the first thing that most britts googled after the EU referendum was “what is EU”? Yeah, it’s a bit like that.)

So, being upfront and transparent about this; I really don’t care about if you think the ideas being presented up in article 13 is horrible or whatever, because I personally haven’t really decided on it yet. What I want to set straight is that the apocalyptic death of “the European net neutrality” isn’t what article 13, or the directive on copyright in the Digital Single Market, is about.

Now, I know that EU and its bureaucracy is a literal hellscape. I’m a law student, and I’ve studied 15 points of EU and constitutional law, and 10 points of international law, and it wasn’t until I studied intentional law (2 years later) that the EU law finally started settling for me. (And from the sound of it; for the rest of my classmates too.)

So I know that the EU is complicated and stupid and that they don’t make it easier for themselves, but I just want everyone to know that the EU isn’t the life-sucking demons that the far-right is painting them up to be. They can be a massive pain in the ass, but they aren’t an all-powerful despotic.

And here’s why;

So starting with the basics of the overall law making process in the EU; Article 13 comes from a directive. It’s often been compared to GDPR, which is, weird, but also understandable, seeing how big of an impact GDPR had. But GDPR had such a huge impact because it was a regulation.

There’s two different ways the EU makes laws; through directives and regulations. Regulations, like GDPR, are directly applicable on all member states, are directly incorporated into member states’ national law systems, and can be directly plead for by EU citizens. Hence the huge impact.

Directives, on the other hand, are frame regulations with goals set up by the EU, and then it’s up to each and every member state to incorporate the directive into their national law systems and make sure that those goals are met. That is why the wall of text up there is a literal hot mess that makes little to no sense; it’s because it sets up a framework of what the EU wants to accomplish, then it’s up to the member states to come with their own solutions of how they want to accomplish that.

So, unlike GDPR, the copyright directive isn’t going to change the internet overnight once it’s voted through. It’s going to have to go through several different national law procedures, with various different outcomes, which could take years and, in some cases, might not even change anything at all.

(There are ways in which directives can be directly applicable for EU citizens, but then it has to be battled out through the EU court, so let’s make a noise if it comes to that, then, shall we?)

So you can’t fight this at an EU level. I mean, I guess you can, but be honest with yourself, did you even vote in the EU parliament election? Do you even know who’s representing you in the EU parliament? Do you even know what the EU parliament is, or what it does?

If you want to fight this, it would be so much more effective to do it on a national level.

First of all, depending on which member state you live in, this might not even effect you. The most common procedure when it comes to directives is that the national parliament/government looks at the goals the directive sets up, goes “lol ya our national laws already live up to this” (even if the national laws doesn’t live up to the directive, because, honestly, no one really gives that much of a damn, and the commission has too much to do to keep track of all the directives they spew out), and then everyone goes on with their lives.

But let’s say that your government would actually take measures to incorporate the directive into your national law system. Now, the law procedures are different in every country, but unless you live in a quasi-democracy (looking at you Hungary. And Poland.), you as a citizen, or at the very least an association of citizens, get to have a say in the matter.

They will most likely draft their own proposal of how the directive will be incorporated into your national law, and then you can take a stand if the change is for something good or bad. Call all your national politicians, twitter bomb them, whatever floats your boat. But the directive isn’t going to actually affect you until it reaches the national level.

The European net neutrality is not going to be killed over a night through a directive.

First of all, because that’s not how a directive works, and second, the EU doesn’t have that kind of power, even if they wanted to.

The EU is an odd bird in the international community. It has its own, unique way of operating, and it’s the only “semi-above” association of nations so far in the world. But it’s still an association of nations, and the union’s entire basis is the surrendering of sovereignty from each member state. And while that scope of sovereignty is a constant battle between the union and its member states, that sovereignty still always originate in the member states.

And no member state has surrendered enough power to allow the EU to censor the entire internet.

Copyright laws are also so weird. Like, I can’t speak for any other country, but in Sweden we already have copyright protection for every human made creation. It’s already forbidden by Swedish law to use others copyrighted material without their consent. (We’re one of the countries that would most likely just go “lol ya our national laws already live up to this” if the directive was passed.)

But copyright laws are so incredibly futile.

In Sweden we have laws forbidding piracy copying of just about everything. Still I can (illegally) stream countless of episodes of my favorite TV series, and movies, and music, and download pictures left and right, and no one really bats an eyelash. It’s a shitty thing to do, yeah, sure, and the copyright holder has every right to chew me out over it.

But the point still stands; we already have regulations of it, but nothing really happens.

Copyright infringement is simply too big of a problem, and not acute enough, to be solved. Like, yeah, it’s shitty downloading copyrighted material, but it’s a little more urgent to actually pay attention to our collapsing environment and the impending third world war.

So copyright regulations are statement regulations. They tell us that “yeah, this is a shitty thing to do, please don’t do it”, and then most of us do it anyway. Because a proper sanction system isn’t in place. And it’s most likely going to take a hell of a long time before it does, if it ever.

And it’s not going to come from the EU.

Because then there was the goddamn “link tax”. I just. Oh god.

First of all, “link tax” is the literal worst name to use, because the EU is outright and strictly forbidden to deal with taxes. That’s one sovereignty posts that absolutely no member state is willing to give up. The EU has nothing to do with taxes whatsoever.

So again, this would be dealt with and regulated on a national level. Even if it would be a tax or a fee, it would go to the national economy, and not to the EU. The EU is directly funded by the member states budgets (which they are actually discussing right now, tbh), import duties (because while the EU has no right to deal with taxes, import duties are an entirely different matter because of the inner market), and fines from when you don’t follow EU regulations (which, once again, the commission is way above their ears trying to sort out (hello Sweden’s continuous refusal to become a part of the Euro)).

So if the “link tax” would in any way end up benefiting the EU, it would be through a fine, which would only happen if your member state refused to incorporate the directive. Which is a long way to go, and tbh, isn’t that likely.

And as you can see above, article 13 doesn’t mention a “link tax”, or links, or taxes, and neither does the rest of the directive.

So, no, the EU isn’t gonna make you pay for linking stuff. That’s ridiculous.

And you wanted an in-depth explanation of why that fucking video isn’t real, and I barely even touched the video and haven’t even started going through what article 13 even says, but I’ve already talked my own ear of and this probably makes no sense so. Don’t be afraid to ask me more-head-on questions, and I’ll try to answer them as best as I can!!

Just. Don’t freak out. The internet is safe, for a good long while still, no matter what happens to the directive once its voted on on June 20th.

The memes are still safe.

[rottenbrainstuff]

I noticed in the tags for one of your posts that you said Canada is heading down the same kind of path the US is. Would you mind explaining that to me? I haven't heard about that kind of thing going on but as someone who's major life goal is to move to Canada to be with her lover this sounds pretty terrifying. No pressure if you don't want to discuss that kind of thing though, I generally use Tumblr as an escape for this kind of shit so I totally understand.

Sure I can explain what I mean.This is long, guys, and I'm on mobile, so I apologize.I mean. First of all. I think I might be exaggerating a bit, our politics are always less extreme than the USA and I think they always will be. Our government is organized differently. But a lot of people, Canadians included, have this idea that Canada is this magic land of polite people and free healthcare and we're so much better than the US, and that's just really honestly not true.And I am getting worried about our political situation.First of all, Canada is not and never has been a magic perfect land where there is no racism and everyone is lovely. Our government has a shameful history dealing with indigenous people. We took entire generations of children away from their families and put them in residential schools and beat their culture out of them. We stuck them onto reserves where the conditions were terrible. There's been a huge problem with native women going missing and the police don't care, they don't devote the resources to investigating. And google starlight tours. That's a fun little thing where cops would grab a drunk native, drive them way the hell out on the highway, and just dump them off in the middle of nowhere, at night, in the winter, to let them find their way back to town in the cold. People have died from that. They deal with a ton of social issues now and there's a lot of racist sentiment against natives and it makes me want to scream, like, do you not understand, we did this to them? We broke their culture and all this shit you're complaining about is the fallout from that.We had Japanese internment camps during WW2 just like the US. After 9/11 we had a sharp increase in anti-Muslim bullshit too. There's rural areas in southern Alberta with "a proudly pro life community" signs stuck along the highway. Our government does stupid shit too. Our education didn't get gutted as bad as in the US, but my province made deep cuts to education funding in the 80s and 90s and TO THIS DAY we're still recovering from that. I just want everyone to forget this notion that we're just so much better here and all this crap can't happen here, and honestly I think it's Canadians ourselves who are the worst for this, because i think it makes us stop examining ourselves and asking questions.Which brings me to...I don't like where I see things headed. Living right next to the US, it's inevitable that we are influenced by what goes on there. I think some Canadians are really shocked by what's happening down there and it's really solidified this sense of "well I don't want THAT to happen HERE!"....But there's other things going on as well. I definitely notice a lot more racist buzz. Familiar members of mine who were just annoyingly conservative before are now blatantly and offensively islamophobic. In my province we recently had someone set fire to a mosque during evening prayer. There's graffiti and hate crimes. I do notice it getting worse.Recently we had a bit of a political shakeup, in that we got rid of Stephen Harper, a conservative premier who had been in office for a while, and elected Trudeau, who is liberal, and... despite what you might think of him, is a charismatic leader. In my province, we've had a conservative provincial government for decades, and we got so sick of it that we voted NDP in the last election, which is a worker's party, essentially, and they raised our goddamned minimum wage.And just like in the US, when you elected Obama after all the grumbling there was about Bush and there was push-back against Obama, there seems to be a conservative push-back to all of this.In Ontario they recently elected an absolute buffoon as premier, Doug Ford, and to be honest he strikes me as Trump Lite. He is related to an absolute fuckhead who used to be a mayor, Rob Ford, and whose "antics" were so ridiculous it got us international attention. Anyway this asshole Doug, he wants to do fun stuff like limit access to abortion, and roll back the minimum wage, and other bullshit like that. I thought he was too ridiculous and extreme to get elected premier, and I was wrong.A year or two ago we had a municipal election in my city, and there was concern that there was a mysterious lobby group that no one knew anything about trying to influence the election. Municipal elections are municipal! There was a gross smear campaign and people even stooped to literally sweeping the city and removing all the signage placed out by one of the candidates. Luckily it turned out the campaign didn't work and the candidates that had been targeted mostly all still won, but like. It was just so chilling to me, in the context of everything else that's been happening lately. I'd never seen anything like that happen in my city before.I hear nothing but articles about what a shitty job Trudeau is doing, first it was he was fucking us over by not pushing through this stupid goddamned pipeline, then it was that he was a liar and a traitor by eventually signing the pipeline, he's corrupt, he's a liar, all this shit. My *liberal* friends are telling me all this stuff. I'm not saying he's perfect. He's not. But here's the thing.There's been reports of concerns of Russian and Chinese involvement with our elections. I take consumer response surveys to earn money. Sometimes the surveys ask about local politics or concerns. Suddenly in the last year, the political surveys are unprofessionally biased and asking me questions about conservative politics. A fun local paper we had was recently bought by someone else and now instead of fun local stories, it's all this urgent scaremongering. FLOOD SEASON! AIRLINE STRIKE DISASTER! CITY HOUSING CRISIS!And I think about how we had the facebook data mining, I think about the Russian Tumblr accounts spreading discord to demoralize left leaning voters, and I'm worried that I'm watching the start of that. It makes me feel extremely uneasy. I think there's something going on.The Conservative party is kind of fumbling around at the moment, and I'm worried there's going to be a massive reorganization, and come next election, we're going to be looking at a racist, religious conservative candidate who wants to privatize our healthcare, limit immigration, reduce abortion access, freeze minimum wages, let oil and gas do whatever the fuck they want, etc etc etc. I'm worried it'll be a scary candidate like we've never seen before.And I'm worried that our next election will be Trudeau VS Trump 2.0, and the left-leaning voters will be split between parties, because these shadowy groups have spent a few years making everyone disagree with each other, and it will be the same thing, the exact same goddamned thing that happened in the US. "But Trudeau is so corrupt...." they'll say, and they'll split the vote, and we'll have some awful, awful shit who wants to ruin everything.Now, that's a pretty alarmist attitude, perhaps. There's certain values and certain rights we have in Canada that we're pretty passionate about, and I don't think politicians would be able to get away with as much bullshit up here as they do down there. But I don't know what's happening any more. I'm not sure of anything. Every time I think "it would never get that bad" or "people would never let that happen" something happens that proves me wrong, so. I honestly don't know. I have a really bad feeling in my gut from the weird things I see happening, I've put two and two together, and I don't like what I see.So I mean. At the end of the day, I don't think things up here will ever be as crazy as things in the US. Our government is organized a little differently, we deal with issues a little differently. But I'm still concerned. I don't like what I see, and these last two years have taught me that human beings are fucking disappointing and we don't fucking learn, from anything.I think Canada is a good place to live, and I think it will probably continue to be a good place to live. (Maybe stay away from Ontario and the prairie provinces though)There's my extremely pessimistic point of view. Probably other Canadians wouldn't tell you this, so maybe take it with a grain of salt. Message me if you have any other questions, I would love to answer them.

[groundramon]

Actually you know what, hot take because I was talking about MOGAI discourse earlier: discourse around media (such as “anti” behavior) can be just as harmful to kids as MOGAI labels.  Not in the same way of course, the only similarity they have is that they both come from a place of good intent.

To preface this before you read my first paragraph and go off on me: I am an anti.  I am a minor.  I have been an anti for years.  I’m talking from my experiences as well as things I’ve observed on this website.  Also, if you call yourself an anti-anti or think anti discourse is stupid or whatever, stop reading this right now because you’re not welcome here.  This is not arguing that anti mentality is bad - no, anti mentality should be the norm.  I’m just exploring the possibility that it can be toxic to kids to engage heavily in this topic.  It is not toxic for kids to be antis, especially if they don’t engage in discourse, and it is NOT the kid’s fault for being dragged into it.  It’s 100% the fault of all the weird adults and older teens who normalize this kind of shit.  I’m simply recording how older antis (which, I could consider myself one despite being a minor) can create a toxic environment for minors as well.

Okay? Alright.

I’ve been thinking a lot about how I express myself and my views on media lately.  I won’t get into details of how that came about, and honestly if you think you know the reason you don’t actually know the full story because I’ve discussed this with multiple people now.  Some context: I’m not a naturally angry person.  I have a tendency to sound very angry while ranting about things in media, because I have a strong sense of justice, a passion for fictional media that I hate seeing botched like that, and I have a shitty way of wording things.  I’ve realized lately though, that what could’ve started as me overreacting about my annoyance from something (I honestly don’t remember at this point, because of how deeply ingrained this behavior has been into me) has turned into legitimate rage.

I don’t like being angry.  I feel very, very bad when I’m angry.  It’s honestly worse than the lowest lows of my depression for me.  Anger isn’t a common emotion for me and it makes me uncomfortable, especially because I feel like I could easily hurt someone while I’m worked up.  And I don’t like feeling like that.  Anger pretty much makes all my mental illnesses/disorders get worked up into a tizzy and makes me feel Bad.

There’s honestly not a single thing I go into not scanning for something to nitpick.  Normally it’s just a shitpost, because I’ve tried to streamline what I watch to the few things that don’t make me mad (namely kids cartoons) so there’s nothing to really get that worked up about.  But when I try to watch any anime, which I enjoy when im sad btw because absorbing myself in complex fictional worlds and continuous storylines is very therapeutic to me, hoo boy...

Do you see the problem?  There aren’t enough Steven Universes in the world to satisfy my crave for content while also avoiding anything that ticks me off.  Hell, at this point at Steven Universe I dont even know whats going on so I’m kind of just there for the ride, but at least it doesn’t do anything as horrendous as most of the anime I’ve seen.  I may be able to pick up some silly situational cartoons like We Bare Bears that are fine, but a lot of those don’t interest me too much - and go back to the peak of action cartoons and there’s a lot of equally questionable stuff to most PG13-rated anime nowadays.

What I’m doing right now, the way I’m processing media right now, is not a good thing.  Is it Horikoshi’s fault for creating Mineta that I feel this way?  Yes, 100%; I have a right to feel indignant about a sexual assaulter being promoted in such a way.  But can I do anything about Horikoshi creating Mineta?  No, no I cannot, except hopefully advocate in the future for the banishment of pedophilic undertones in media.  But right now?  I’m a kid.  I can’t even vote yet.  I could protest, but where?  Who would care?  I don’t have a car anyways, also I’d get heat stroke.  I can yell about it online but I’m not yelling about it to anyone who needs to hear it, I’m just reminding good people that shitty people Exist.

There’s nothing I can do, so for my sake, I need to try to calm down about it.  I need to stop myself when I start to get angry, not go on a rant - or go on a rant just to get it out of my system, but hopefully work to the point where I dont have to rant every time it happens.  I can just roll my eyes and move the fuck along.

But I see people, namely older antis (usually around my age or a little older?  Maybe college-aged), act like this stuff is good, act like this stuff is okay.  They tell 13 yr olds and 14 yr olds that this is how they should process media, that they need to deconstruct media every time they watch it to be aware of who they’re supporting.

Stop that.  I agree that awareness is good, but you’re going to make these kids self-destruct any time they try to enjoy something.  There’s a difference between acknowledging flaws and still enjoying something anyways, and the overanalyzing shit that Tumblr encourages.  And you’re putting this shit on KIDS!  Literal kids!  You’re acting like it’s kids’ responsibility to identify problematic stuff in media!  IT’S NOT!

Saying that it is is like saying I, personally, am responsible for global warming because we own a van and a hybrid car instead of two electric cars.  That’s not true; even if I became a forest creature I wouldn’t make a dent in global warming.  The people controlling it are the people at the top of the food chain - the rich.  Honestly living in california has taught me that poor people get fucked over at the expense of the rich; sure we’re democratic, but tell that to the people who cant water their lawns bc the water bill is too high because of a “drought” that’s been artificially created by poor resources and rich people in malibu or w/e over-watering their lawns.

Kids can be antis because it helps them protect themselves.  But for god’s sake, don’t act like kids have to analyze every piece of media they come across.  Nobody has to do that, it’s not healthy for anyone, but it’s ESPECIALLY not healthy for kids.  Don’t guilt trip them for not giving up BNHA because of Mineta.

Be fucking careful with your words; your intentions may be good, but your results may not be.

Once again “anti-anti”s/anyone who supports that kinda shit don’t interact, this post isn’t for you.  This post isn’t about how anti community is inherently toxic; it’s about how you created a potentially toxic counter-movement because of your even more toxic behavior.  You’re far worse than the people I’m talking about in this post.  You created them.  Also fuck you.

[chaquismaliq]

Acoustic Adventures: Chaquis Maliq Slept at a Gas Station

Okay... I haven’t written anything since MARCH?! Wow! Yeah, I’ve had a lot going on this year...and still going. But. I’m here to fulfill my commitment to myself and continue with Acoustic Adventures. 

So, I believe I’m starting with the end of March in this entry. 

First Time Teaching

ECM Pilot

So, I finally got my shot at teaching and it was an experience that I look forward to having over and over again. I taught Science & Physics through music. There was doubt about me being successful in my quest. Did I prove those folks wrong? Well, I proved myself to be who I say I am and do what I say I can do. I don’t live to prove to others, but live to expose the future to a better future with my gifts.

I was indeed nervous about teaching on my first day. But what I found was that it all felt so natural. I felt like I’d done it before, like it was a dormant calling all these years. I broke the ice with doing the #1WomanBand version of “Music and Me” and they simply loved it! I will not exploit my curriculum in this blog entry, but I was able to get the children to understand Physical Science a lot better with my creative approach to teachings. I still need to put the footage together of their final projects. Although they roughly had 3 hours (in 3 Days) to complete their tasks for presentation, they all pulled it off!  

 I've had too much fun with the 5th graders of Ashley River Creative Arts Elementary over the  3 day pilot. They were nothing but productive and eager to learn while creating! 🏆🙌 The school teacher is probably still trying to figure out why I raise the ✌ and shout peace to get their attention lol. When you're from #SanFrancisco and been in the #dmv soooo long....it stays with you no matter where you are.

At the end of the student's musical performance on what they learned over the 3 day Science workshop with me, one group wanted to have a vote on who had the best song. 

I asked: why? 

The group said: because it's fun and we need to know who's the best. 

I said: but this isn't a competition. 

The group: but we need to know who's the best of the best. 

I responded: you all are the best. And trying to find out otherwise are just people's opinions. Do people's opinions always matter? 

The group: No. 

Me: Everyone put forth effort and came up with great songs and were very creative in how they presented what they learned in such a short workshop. You all are fantastic! 

A post shared by Chaquis Maliq (@chaquismaliq) on Mar 22, 2017 at 10:05am PDT

492

And on the same day as the last day of the teaching pilot, I had to do a 3 hour gig...LOL! I was supposed to perform on the patio at 492. A pretty cool new restaurant in Charleston. But somehow we had a shift in weather. It was a beautiful day and then ALL THE RAIN AND WIND came out of nowhere. 

The ambiance in this establishment is pretty relaxing. I really wish I got to experience the patio. There isn’t really a performance space inside 492. I pretty much performed in the entrance way. But I was welcomed by everyone who came in. And when I took my first break (the gig was 3 hours), some patrons asked if I was coming back to sing, because they really enjoyed my sound. As I walked past the kitchen, one of the cooks actually said, “Thank you so much for performing tonight. We never like the performers that come and play here. But I really love your music.”  And then when I was closing up shop, the folks that had a private party going on upstairs were like: Wait! That was you down here?! I thought it was the radio!”

ME 2 Times in A Row:

A post shared by Chaquis Maliq (@chaquismaliq) on Mar 24, 2017 at 10:56am PDT

Spartanburg Unplugged

So my first time performing in Spartanburg, SC and these wonderful peoples put me in the newspaper!!! Guess what?! I didn’t even know until after the show was over. First of all..... I did like 90 mph to get to this gig on time. It was a 3 hour drive lol! Don’t worry I used to street race and I have a clean driving record. 

I posted the online article the day before the show. I had know idea about any of it. I just have a healthy habit of googling myself because..... you never know. And when I took a break during my performance to allow the audience to chat with me, purchase CD's; etc. One lady (Ms. Vanessa) said that she saw me in the paper. 

I said: online? 

She says: yeah. But printed in the paper too. 

Me: 

So, it got to the point where I just asked if she could ask clerk if there were anymore. (They usually toss them daily) But my new supporter Ms. Vanessa went and asked for me. And Mr. Tom (so helpful the entire day) knew there was 1 left and brought to me!!!!!!!!!!!!! 🙏🙌😭 . 

When they say: "It doesn't hurt to ask...." 👌🚀 

And the gig was fun! They were waiting for me (at the doe) before 2pm 💜 !

WE ARE NOW ENTERING THE MONTH OF APRIL LOL!

Venus Williams

I had actually thought I missed the day to go see Venus Williams play. And then I said: “Let me check the site and make sure”. And YES! I still had a chance to see her. I know some of you are probably reading this like, “Have you seen Serena?!” Here’s the thing, I’m not really about competition. I grew up knowing about the both of them. After all, they are sisters, no need to pin them against each other. They both changed history for Black Women and that’s what counts. 

Anyhow... I’m always on a budget and looking for cheap or free things to explore. I finally made it down to the Volvo Stadium for WTA. Parking was really weird. There were all kinds of street closures and detours to lead me to the parking lot. I finally get there, and then  I have to catch school bus back to the stadium. So, I get off the bus like it’s the first day of school and I know no one. LOL! 

I asked the guy at the gate where to buy tickets.... AND he gave me a ticket! 

Me: Are you sure

Stadium Employee: Yes. It’s fine. The ticket is fine. Go and have a good time.

Me: Geee. Thanks!

Stadium Employee: Is this your first time at WTA?

Me: YES!

So, I make my way to the general admission section and speak with the attendant there. He ended up letting me sit in the lower section. And volunteered to take my photo so that the memory reflected Venus Williams playing in the background.

The Attendant learned that this was my first time at a tennis tournament. Anyone who really knows me, knows that I did not stay for the entire tournament. HOURS AND HOURS of (click play below lol). But finally Venus came on out and did her thing. The scoring in Tennis HELLA weird. I played basketball, softball, volleyball, and football. But never tennis..... I started to see the opponent’s successful tactic, but couldn’t see why Venus didn’t see it or catch on earlier. 

But when the attendant told me what the numbers were under Venus’ name...  VENUS’ Speed is INCREDIBLE! I would not want to be hit by her or Serena LOL! I don’t wish to be hit at all....but I’m just saying.... SHEESH! 

A post shared by Chaquis Maliq (@chaquismaliq) on Apr 5, 2017 at 11:26am PDT

Spring into Action

The of month April is child abuse and sexual assault awareness month. If you have been following my blog or my social media, you probably already know that I am an Anti-Domestic Violence Speaker in addition to the many other things that I do. One night at a show at the Eclectic Cafe and Vinyl, the owner and operator of Marion’s House approached me about performing at her fundraiser. I related a lot to the background and mission of this organization and made sure I was available for the event. The fundraiser was for children who have been sexually abused and to bring in prevention. night at the Spring Into Action  Awareness Fundraiser for Marion's House at Elliotborough Mini Bar. I Met great People and had good food from @chefjtwoods.  If you'd like more information on how to make a difference reach out to Marion's House, My Sister's House & PeopleAgainstRape. 

Always room to make a difference and change the world for the better one person at a time.  https://www.facebook.com/MarionsHousePCSA/

Incluza-Palooza

A little over a week ago at the College of #charleston for Incluza-Palooza. I was so nervous not doing my #1WomanBand set especially with a song I haven't performed in probably 3 years or more lol. I chose "Calling My Shots" for this event because it was about human rights and equality. The audience started clapping on their own, that made me feel a whole lot better and then they joined in for the hook 🙌. I had a great time that night. A lot of laughter and love in the space. And smiles and greetings from students 💜 Oh. This song actually was popular for 24hrs on my #spotify for the first time, thanks to the audience!

The "Hey I'm Chaquis Maliq. And I'm nervous" face. Doing a one song set was weird. So I didn't do the #1WomanBand . So I brought Mr. Maliq (only).

The Outdoor Fest lol

Soooooooooo....uuuummmmm. This was my first time going to this event. I had been trying to go to a festival like this for that past few years and I got my chance. It was like $10 to try everything that the festival offered apart from the vendors who had extravagant things to try for a price.

Any way, when I first got in the park there was a sign that said beware of the alligators. 

 Gratefully I didn’t witness any alligators. Especially when I had to cross the little bridge of the creek. Not some stable bridge you could  ride a bike over, but more like the bridges in Disney movies that always seem to end up with main characters hanging from it while attempting cross in order to save themselves. Like we had to wait until oncoming folks got through the bridge. (I’m trying to see if I can find a pic. I can’t remember if I took one. Or if I was concentrating on controlling anxiety.) Anyway... It was my turn to cross and all I could think of was the kids behind me doing way too much and trying to run across this damned thing. Like you had to hold on for your life to the roped “safety” rail the entire time. But yeah... I made it to the other side so I could try the rock climb.

So, at this point of the photo above, I am actually coming down. LOL! I didn’t hit the bell. I needed literally 2 inches to hit it. But I could not find anywhere to put my foot without feeling like I was going to slip away and be hanging from the damn rock climbing wall. So, yeah... In my eyes I made it to the top. LOL! I DO NOT CARE WHAT YOU THINK EITHER. I was terrified on that damn thing. 

And then shortly after the damn video. (And yeah I’m saying damn, a lot, because I am re-living this as I am telling you.) I pretty much WIPED OUT on the mini bike ramp. I got up and was like: “I’M SAFE! I’M SAFE!” I was fine. Nothing was broken. God forbid, because I have never broken anything before. 

However, I’m walking with the bike and notice there’s blood on my arm. And I tell one of the guys at the booth. They ask me to sit down and tell me to relax..... But then this Firefighter comes to the rescue and starts talking to me because he sees how bad the damn wound is. I haven’t seen it. No one wants me to see it. And I don’t want to see it. Because If I trip out... there may be no point of return. 

So, the Firefighter is speaking to me as if I am dying or have a concussion. Asking me things like: Do you know where you are? Do you know what day it is? Did you hit your head?

I do have video of the aftermath and photos of the wound.... but I don’t want to run ya’ll away from the blog. I think I will just put it in a documentary. But yeah... my care is stick shift and I had to drive myself to the hospital, because they made me leave the park. LOL! They were like..... are you sure you’re gonna be alright? I kept telling him. This is my right arm. I need my right arm. I’m A MUSICIAN! Because the firefighter insisted I go to the hospital but says it I didn’t have to, until they realized how bad the wound was, after waiting like 20 minutes for the people who work there to find a first aid kit. Yes, I just was sitting there  bleeding the entire time, until I finally started to feel the damn pain and  one girl walking by and being hysterical when she saw my nasty boo boo. She yelled: OH MY GAAAAAAAAAAAAAWD! Welp... so much for me thinking my wound wasn’t that bad. 

But yeah... I drove myself to the hospital. Grabbed a honeybun so I could endure the wait (I hadn’t really eaten yet). But the wait wasn’t long until I got checked in with a nurse. The doctor kept asking me was I HIGH?! Because I was calm... I said: NO! And then she just kept asking me. I’m like.... BRUH! I have extreme general anxiety. And if I trip out in here.... then I’ll be checked in here for another reason and could possibly die. So, stop trying to get me to panic and get this shyt over with. No, I didn’t say it in those exact words... but that the truth. STITCH ME UP DOC SO I CAN GO LIVE MY LIFE!. And this was the first time I got stitches with my grownup self. LOL! She took pics too. I have them lol! 

A post shared by Chaquis Maliq (@chaquismaliq) on Apr 22, 2017 at 12:47pm PDT

Lauryn Hill

So, yeah I got to see the post loc’d Lauryn Hill! It was everything! And yes, I prayed that she didn’t bail out on Charlotte. She started on time and everything. I just hated the fact that the venue did not allow you to have lawn chairs that were over a certain height. I understood why. But why couldn’t that be put on the site.I had to pay for a chair. SMH! but it was worth it! My weekend was looking bright! Next day was a gig at the Spring Fling in Spartanburg.

A post shared by Chaquis Maliq (@chaquismaliq) on Apr 28, 2017 at 8:24pm PDT

Spring Fling

One of the first things I do or make sure I do before I leave a gig, is see if I’m the booklet. I mostly do festivals, and there is always good chance there is some press worth keeping if you are apart of it. There may not always be a bio or blurb about you, but it’s always good to have printed memorabilia of your accomplishments. Well, because the online stuff almost always disappears. And yes, I screenprint/screenshot those things too. But it was cool to see me in the printed program for the Spring Bling. This is the first time I’d seen this photo printed on anything.

AND YES! I'm on stage a week after I wiped out on a bike ramp, rockin my bandages covering my stitched up wound; in the high and humid heat, at the Spartanburg Spring Fling. I was supposed to get my stitches removed on this day. But The EccentroSoul #1WomanBand gotta make it do what it do lol! 

There was a scare right before my set. Like the wind kicked up and it got DARK AS #$%Q*#$%*Q$&!  But we prayed that away. 

I made soundcheck fun and started my set a little early, because people filled the bleachers, and I didn't want to keep them waiting. Sound was on point and I sang to the crowd asking them how was the sound? They sang back to me to tell me it was was good and we went on with the show! They were soooooooooooooo lovely! 

I ended my set with "Tired of Being" and actually wasn't nervous about singing it, finally.  I got dap from a sistah. And a brotha in the bleachers made sure I could hear him when I asked them to sing with me on “You Are”. And after my set the kindest compliment and encouragement from a total stranger said, "I'm Proud of You." 

A lot goes on at shows and at festivals, plus things that happens to us personally.... But it's up to me to make the best of it and not to forget the bright moments that balanced out the day.

Later that night, on the way home I was sort of celebrating my happiness while driving. I had car trouble on the way to Charlotte the day before. But thought it was just the radiator. I had coolant and everything on hand....and paid attention to the temperature gage. I released all the bottled up energy I had by singing obnoxiously. I mean I was in the car by myself, so no one could hear me being really annoying and googy. I got off to grab a bite to eat. The drive was like 3 hours.....I was halfway home I think.... and then suddenly my car DIED ON THE MUTHAAAAAAAAAAAAAA $(Q&%($%&Q($%&Q$ Freeway!   

GEICO Called 3 tow companies before someone said they’d come and get me. It was a black tow company and the man sounded like a sweet grampa (grandpa). I straight up told him I didn’t have much cash on me and how far away I was from home. He was surprised that I know exactly where I was on the freeway, because most of the women who call him can never tell him where there are exactly. I was less than mile from the nearest and last exit for several miles. But I am going to tell you what I always know when I’m on the road...and this has been since I was a kid and was never taught to me.

1. PAY ATTENTION TO THE SIGNS

PAY ATTENTION TO THE DIRECTION YOU’RE GOING

KNOW WHAT HIGHWAY, FREEWAY, & STREET YOU’RE ON

ON THE FREEWAY THE Green Signs on the side of the road are the Mile Markers of what highway you’re on (That’s how you can tell someone exactly where you are if you know what freeway you’re on and the direction)

Same thing for signs on overpasses you see from the freeway.

Also, when I’m going to a new place, I tend to SCREENSHOT the directions in case the signal gets lost. You can also print them.

I DO NOT GET LOST. If you don’t have a good sense of direction, you should probably start PAYING ATTENTION. 

And yeah....I slept in the gas station that had the Greyhound station. I did not have a way to get home and could not afford a hotel room after all I’d done over the weekend. I had already stayed at a hotel to see Lauryn Hill. And needed to deposit my check from the gig. Grampa Tow Guy, made sure I was straight at the Gas/Greyhound station. Even offered to pay for the ticket. I didn’t let him pay for it because he towed me for free and made sure I was safe. 

The one person that I am closest to, was sleep while all of this was happening. I texted photos and updates to let them know I was okay. They called first thing in the morning to make sure. As you can see in the photo, I have on my favorite pants lol...and tapped into some Wifi to stream shows to keep me calm. I dozed off maybe about 4 times for like an hour... before the morning. And the ladies who worked at the station made sure no one bothered me and that the bus driver didn’t charge me for having my entire life with me getting on the bus. Yes, I had to get as much stuff out of my car as I could. 

So, yeah... I finally made it home and the Grampa Tow Guy checked on me again. I ended up just giving him the title to the car, because I couldn’t afford to get the car fixed. Yeah, the timing belt came off while I was driving... So, Hondy is gone forever.  

And yes... RESILIENCE ELUDES DEATH!

Thanks for reading... I did not proof this. I probably won’t lol! I really really appreciate your support! 

xoxoxoxo,

-Chaquis Maliq 8.20.17 

RESILIENCE ELUDES DEATH FALL TOUR 2017 DATES

RESILIENCE ELUDES DEATH AVAILABLE NOW!

chaquismaliq.com

[vkndr]

master cheryl x veronica post

This is my master post about cheryl x veronica relationship up to episode 7 (chapter seven: in a lonely place), so bare with my madness and you’ll see what I see.

Just have in mind that:

♛ I truly believe that Veronica Lodge is into girls, and that she’s at least pansexual or bisexual (but I can’t say that the writers know this too)

♛ I’m a little bit crazy and sometimes I see things where there’s none, so excuse me for that in advancement.

♛ I’ll be using what I think it’s foreshadow, popular references and reading between the lines.

♛ I’ll also be pointing out why I believe Veronica is queer (specially with Betty).

♛ I made this to my express my hopes that Cheryl and Veronica will become canon in terms of romantic feelings.

And please, join me into expanding this master post. Discuss with me and other all about it. Point me out if I’m wrong or extremely right about something. I love feedback.

So, I decided yesterday to do binge re-watching of all episodes, and I wrote while I was watching it. So here it is:

♛ Chapter One: The River’s Edge

♡ In the intro Jughead says ❝Get closer tho, and you’ll start seeing the shadows underneath❞ and that’s exactly what I’ll be doing here.

♡ Veronica is extremely happy finding a gay friend (Kevin) in Riverdale. This could mean a lot more than the cliche rich girl + her gay friend, after all if Veronica’s gay she will want to have another queer with her. The queer kids gotta stick together.

♡ Like someone already pointed out #There’s no heterosexual explanation for Cheryl turning around at the very moment Veronica comes to find a table, when none of her minions is even the slightest turned to see if the new girl was there. Like that’s a fucking gaydar or something. And she definitely checks Veronica out. And on the other hand Reggie turns like he’s not even interested. Mmm.

♡ The famous B&V kiss actually can mean A LOT. 

Firstly, I think that V had a crush on B since the begging for sure.

V was okay with doing it, like it meant nothing new to her; she’s so used to kissing girls that it didn’t make the difference for her. But she thought it would mean something completely new and bold to Cheryl and her minions, when actually it doesn’t. Cheryl rolls her eyes, implying that what she saw did not impressed her and that she was bored. If you didn’t caught that then she throws that at their faces saying  ❝Faux lesbian kissing hasn’t been taboo since 1994❞. This whole scene could be queerbaiting like many thinks it was, but this single scene could’ve also been done to show that neither Veronica or Cheryl were shocked with the idea of lesbianism; that is actually something normal for both of them.

♡ The aftermath that comes after the kiss is interesting as well. Veronica at some point says ❝I know what you need, Cheryl, because I know who you are. You would rather people fear than like you, so you traffic in terror and intimidation. You’re rich, so you’ve never been held accountable, but I’m living proof. That certainty, that entitlement you wear on your head like a crown? It won’t last. Eventually, there will be a reckoning. Or… Maybe that reckoning is now. And maybe, that reckoning… Is me.❞ Do I really need to say more? Veronica is the closest that Cheryl (besides maybe Josie) has that have been through most of the things she has. No one can understand Cheryl best than V can. And she just said that she's freaking messiahs or something that came to change the reality that Cheryl’s trapped into. 

♡ V also says that she used to be a spoiled rich bitch ice princess, and that is the perfect way to describe Cheryl.  ❝I was like Cheryl. I was worst than Cheryl…..  I made a pact with myself to use this as an opportunity to become maybe, hopefully, a better version of myself.❞ Betty replies  ❝That’s a lot of pressure.❞ and I believe that’s implied to Cheryl and Veronica relationship as well, and it’s what’s going to happen. Veronica will try to help Cheryl through what she’s going though, she’ll try to have Cheryl become the better version of herself. And that’s going to be a lot of pressure, it won’t be easy. 

♡ Betty after says ❝When Polly and Jason got together… It meant everything to her and nothing to him, and… And things got super intense and weird and toxic and my mom turned on Polly. Said Polly wasn’t her daughter anymore, said all these awful things to her. Jason hurt Polly, but it’s my mom who broke her.❞ It could also be a foreshadow to Cheryl’s and Veronica future relationship. I’ll link this to Madelaine’s interview later on this post.

♛ Chapter Two: A Touch of Evil 

♡ Veronica is poor af right now and she still manages to get Betty flowers and cupcakes flown from New York? #There’s no heterosexual explanation #So gay

♡ Veronica was checking Betty’s ass at practice or?  #There’s no heterosexual explanation #So gay

♡ ❝Most of the time the people we like don’t like us back. Romeo and Juliet are the exception, not the rule.❞ Besides being my favorite quote so far, I can’t help myself relating this line to something that Madelaine said in a interview, that I’ll link to it later on this post.

♡ Cheryl calling Veronica closet monster I believe I don’t even have to mention the ambiguity here.

♡ Veronica calling Cheryl the anti-christ in the first episode and Cheryl calling Veronica the evil incarnated in the second episode. It must be love.

♡ Cheryl having her panic attack and Veronica going after her just proves my point that Veronica will try to help Cheryl become her best version. Why in the hell would she help if she despises Cheryl likes it’s implied in the first couple episodes? This scene breaks that.

♡ In the begging of the episode Veronica is more than eager to pair up with Betty in class, but in the end, when the principal and the sheriff comes for Cheryl we can see that Veronica paired up with her. Why if they’re not friends or anything? Ar this point Veronica is closer to Jughead after the core four hang out @ Pop’s than she’s with Cheryl.

♛ Chapter Three: Body Double

♡ When Veronica’s crying about the nasty comments about her, we can see a comment by Cheryl ❝I usually pity the poor, but❞ and Cheryl’s comment isn’t that bad, but if I was Veronica I’d be hating everyone who commented.

♡ The most awesome scene in this goddamn series: party’s @ Ethel’s. I just want to say a huge thank you very much for who created this scene, ‘cause it definitely made me realized that Veronica Lodge is for sure into girls. That look that she gives Betty can only be translated as ‘OMFG, UR SO HOT I WANT U SO BAD RN’, everyone can see it.

♡ I find it rather interesting that Veronica couldn’t sleep after torturing Chuck. Betty I understand, she went full psycho over him, but why V? She should’ve slept like a baby after getting the truth out of that jackass. My guess is that she was so overwhelmed with her attraction for Betty.

♛ Chapter Four: The Last Picture Show

♡ Veronica preferences on films ❝I vote for anything starring Audrey Hepburn. Or Cate Blanchett.❞ Me too girl, specially the Children’s Hour and Carol (both LGBT films with main lesbian characters with Audrey and Cate respectively)

♡ Cheryl saying ❝You are a Lodge, after all, and Lodges are known to have sticky fingers.❞ God, this sounded so dirty in my mind that I can’t even.

♡ #There’s no heterosexual explanation for Cheryl out of the blue deciding to sit with Kevin and Veronica at the drive-in after all that feud between the two of them. Like she just decided to sit there? SO RANDOM and weird. I don’t even know how to explain because I don’t even know what happened. It’s clear that Veronica couldn’t care less about Cheryl, trying to get her out to get more refill, but all Cheryl does is to ask Kevin to fetch more and when he does and Veronica starts to get away from Cheryl SHE JUST GET’S CLOSER TO VERONICA LIKE WHAT¿ SHE DOESN’T EVEN LIKE VERONICA. #So gay #So gay #So gay

♛ Chapter Five: Heart of Darkness

♡ Cheryl attacks Veronica while handing her the invitation for Jason's funeral ‘cause she’s Cheryl and Veronica is used to it. But Betty tries to reason her [Cheryl] behavior to Veronica, implying that Veronica actually got upset by Cheryl comments.

♡ Veronica decides that she’s done with her feud with Cheryl and the only way for it to end is by becoming friends. Or frenemies. Or girlfriends. And Cheryl accepts it in a heartbeat. For someone that despises Veronica she should at the very least five it a time to think about it, but instead she invites Veronica to her home, for a freaking sleepover. Too fast, like it was already planned. Veronica makes a face of ‘FML, if that’s what it takes for you to sop fighting’ but agrees to it.

♡ Penelope ❝Cheryl invited you. I have no idea why you’re here.❞ and to that Veronica replies ❝Me neither. I thought there’d be other girls.❞ and Cheryl doesn’t even bother to answer. # Random Cheryl moment

♡ Do I really need to mention the lingerie? Like c’mon, I know that’s to show that they are fancy girls, with the same background, but did they really needed to do that? Really?

♡ Let me just say that one of Veronica Lodge’s favorite hobbies is to look at pretty girls lips, and gurl, she does that not once, not twice, but four time in the gap of 5 minutes with Cheryl.  #There’s no heterosexual explanation #So gay

♡ Veronica insists ❝Why did you invite me tonight? Why not Tina? Or Ginger? Aren’t they your besties?❞ And Cheryl gives her the truth  ❝And yet, that night at the pep rally, after I had my panic attack, you helped me. Not them.❞ Okay, so Cheryl’s grateful for that but even after it happened she continued to treat Veronica like crap, like she forgot what Veronica did to her.

♡ How did they bonded over night so hard for Veronica to feel like she was that close enough to touch Cheryl’s hair like that? # Weird # Random Veronica moment

♡ Let’s just say that protective!Veronica is my favorite. And she was like that A LOT in this episode with Cheryl.

♡ She was so worried about Cheryl that she followed her and Penelope at a very private moment. I just think there’s a much deeper meaning in this scene where we can see Veronica looking to a broken Cheryl through the door crevice than I can put to words.

♛ Chapter Six: Faster, Pussycats! Kill! Kill! 

(None Cheryl in this episode)

♡ Veronica holding Josie’s arms? # So gay In a regular squad you wouldn’t do that.

♡ And there’s the famous caption of that choker Veronica was using during the Pussycats performance. It’s exactly the same we see Cheryl using in episode 3. There’s who believes that they are actually the same and Cheryl gave it to her. I see other two options: they both have the same taste in accessories (that’s also because you can always see some girl at Riverdale wearing a choker, what’s with this town obsession with chokers?) or Veronica actually stole it. That would be kind funny given the whole Cheryl’s speech about searching bags in case of robbery in episode 5.

♛ Chapter Seven: In a Lonely Place

♡ Veronica really close to Josie at the club # So gay 

So those are my thought while re-watching the episodes. Now it’s my thought about a certain interview that I find rather interesting that I already mentioned in a other post. 

In this interview they asked Madelaine (Cheryl) if her character would get a love interest this season, and she said: YES. Cheryl will be having a love interest, later the season, more like a fling. She dares to say that everyone will love, man I can’t think of anyone besides Veronica that people are rooting Cheryl to be with. She even says that people will go crazy about it (read it WE’LL GIVE YOU CHERONICA), there’s no character already introduced that matches Cheryl. None. Only Veronica and a little bit of Josie. But no guy. People are against Cheryl involving romantically with Archie (maybe people will agree to it if it means Archie doesn’t get in the way of Bughead and Beronica), but anyway, let me link you guys to what I’ve said earlier:

♡ Betty after says ❝When Polly and Jason got together… It meant everything to her and nothing to him, and… And things got super intense and weird and toxic and my mom turned on Polly. Said Polly wasn’t her daughter anymore, said all these awful things to her. Jason hurt Polly, but it’s my mom who broke her.❞ It could also be a foreshadow to Cheryl’s and Veronica future relationship. [Chapter One: The River’s Edge]

Madelaine said that Cheryl doesn’t want a relationship. Maybe if (when) she gets with Veronica she won’t be ready for it. It’ll fell like it means everything to Veronica and nothing to Cheryl. And like it’s the CW they will fuck it up and will become a weird and toxic relationship and stuff. Idk, this is really a personal weird post-high thought. You shouldn’t take me seriously here.

♡ ❝Most of the time the people we like don’t like us back. Romeo and Juliet are the exception, not the rule.❞ Besides being my favorite quote of this series so far I can’t help myself relating this line to something that Madelaine said in a interview.

Madelaine said exactly  ❝But of course, Cheryl doesn’t get what she wants because why would she ever?❞ Maybe her feelings is not mutual, maybe Veronica won’t be down for it.

Well, those are just what I think and hope will happen. As long as it becomes canon, cause seriously, they’d be the dumbest if they didn’t made a lesbian couple become canon in this series. Give us lady kisses. 

And last but no least I recall seeing some people making parallels between Riverdale and Gossip Girl, and what I already saw is: Veronica/Blair, Betty/Serena, Jughead/Dan, then there’s Cheryl and Archie left and I think Archie/Nate is obvious, so it’s left Chuck for our dearest Cheryl. And just in case you don’t know or don’t remember, Chuck and Blair, Dan and Serena were endgame. Long live Cheronica and Bughead.

Again guys, give me your feed back and also if you guys could answer a quiz I’ve created about LGBTQ+ representation on TV Series would mean A LOT to me, and I’d be extremely grateful.

[thesinglesjukebox]

SZA X JUSTIN TIMBERLAKE - THE OTHER SIDE

[4.50]

The final battle between corporate shilling and rockism awaits us!

Tobi Tella: SZA sounds smooth and fun, free of the baggage that makes her R&B so good and fully committed to making a great pop song, JT wisely plays backup. Why is a song from Trolls World Tour this good? [7]

Kylo Nocom: Okay, quick aside, can we talk about Trolls World Tour? It seems like it's actually going to try to tackle music genre distinctions in a way that's accessible to the kids: the trolls are all visiting worlds named after Pop, Funk, Classical, Techno, Country and Rock for the sake of defeating Rock World's dictator in some sort of Last Airbender quest. The premise basically being anti-rockist propaganda is badass even though it just confirms everyone's beliefs that poptimism is corporate shilling. But, really, what the fuck is going on? How are they tackling, according to the cast, the reggaeton troll, the K-pop trolls, the smooth jazz trolls, and the presence of a hip hop troll but no hip hop land? Like, duh, these are all just cameos to appeal to a broad audience, but there's no way this movie doesn't just confuse the kids. If the end-goal is to raise a bunch of children to piss off people that care about what's being called disco or not, then I'm all for it! But it's still weird! What I'm basically trying to say is that "The Other Side," like SZA's other two big white-man-funk singles, makes funk sound like the least fun thing in the world, and that if I was a 5-year-old having to listen to this I'd end up a Rock Troll too. [5]

Nortey Dowuona: Baby Keem waits on a plastic chair between 2 couches. Finally, SZA, Isaiah Rashad, Reason, SiR, Lance Skiiwalker and Zacari come in and sit on the right couch. Kendrick, SchoolBoy Q, Jay Rock and Ab-Soul come in and sit on the left couch. Baby Keem says, "Go." After 5 hours of rage, recriminations, tears, hugging, and Lance and SiR showing them a flowchart for watching King of the Hill properly, SZA wrote this for Justin Timberlake. [4]

Wayne Weizhen Zhang: There's a focus-group-tested, sterile quality that keeps me from genuinely liking this breezy, summery collaboration. Still, I'm sure it'll sound pleasant enough planning in the background of whatever JCPenny or Apple store. [5]

Alfred Soto: "You start to feel like you're losing your shine," Justin Timberlake mumbled while regarding his thickening features in the bathroom mirror. SZA might wonder if letting this lamprey attach himself to her will atrophy her self-control and innate sense of rhythm. Certainly neither needs canned Daft Punk post-disco. [2]

Katie Gill: Well that Man of the Woods period was thankfully short, wasn't it? This is a perfectly serviceable song that does its job of playing over the credits as something animated trolls can dance to. It's not as much of an earworm as "Can't Stop The Feeling" and thus I doubt it'll have a fraction of that song's staying power, but I appreciate its existence if only so I'll change up the earworm I inevitably get when someone sings the title phrase. The whole song sounds nostalgic, to the point where when I first heard this song, I spent a solid minute trying to think of what it samples because I've heard that sound before, it has to sample something. Turns out the 'something' is the mid 2000s Justin Timberlake sound itself. [6]

Will Adams: Timberlake's been flogging this cod-funk horse for nearly fifteen years; I don't know what else I could have expected. It's like he heard Calvin Harris's remix of "The Weekend" and figured he could do the same. A few problems here: 1) a "Can't Stop the Feeling!" retread that's been sweetened with aspartame; 2) SZA's vocal buried in an already muddy mix; 3) centering the song on a cliche as ground down as "the grass is greener on the other side." [3]

Jacob Sujin Kuppermann: "Say So," but even more kidz-boppified. SZA sounds good, but Timberlake sounds like he's a reanimated corpse. And yet, the electric piano loop still draws me in, elevating this from kids movie schlock to moderately groovy kids movie schlock. [4]

[Read, comment and vote on The Singles Jukebox]

[neon-mooni]

Yandere Dev debunk page

So the debunk page is not very accessible so I’ll do my best to get the information here. Keep in mind this is Yandere Dev himself saying this so don’t take my word for it.

“YandereDev is rude to his fans, and refuses to apologize!”

In short: 99.9% of the time, my interactions with fans are perfectly civil. The other 0.1% of the time occured under very stressful circumstances.

For more than two years, a group of people have been doing some pretty screwed up things to me. They prank call my phone, they send weird things to my house, they spam me with pictures of bestiality / animal abuse, they flag all of my social media to try to get my accounts banned, they try to hack my accounts, they try to turn my friends against me, and they submit false reports to the police in an attempt to get the SWAT team to show up at my house.

For a very long time, I was hesitant to ever use the word "harassment" to describe what was happening to me, because I didn't want anyone to think that I was trying to create a "victim identity" for myself. I avoided speaking about this matter for as long as I possibly could. But, at this point, I can't keep silent about it any longer, and I think that any reasonable person would agree that what's happening to me definitely qualifies as "harassment."

If you are harassed and abused for an extended period of time, it's eventually going to affect your mood. If your mood gets bad enough, it will cloud your judgement and affect how you speak to others. There have been times when, while I was under a lot of stress due to the constant harassment, I said something rude to another person. But, this is not an indication that I'm a bad guy; it's an indication that I've been treated like garbage for so long, I'm at the end of my rope.

Every day, the anti-YandereDev crowd sends me messages like, "I hope you die in a fire," "I hope you get raped to death by dogs," "I hope your whole family gets AIDS," etc. The meanest thing I've ever said to another person is tame compared to the abuse that I receive from the anti-YandereDev crowd on a daily basis.

When someone contacts me and says, "Hey YandereDev, you said something really rude to me, and it hurt me a lot." I feel guilty and ashamed, and I naturally feel compelled to apologize to them. So far, I've said "I'm sorry" to every single person who has approached me and confronted me about something rude I said to them in the past.

However, I do not plan to create an apology video or apology post aimed at the entire Yandere Simulator fanbase, because I don't feel that I have done anything wrong to the entire fanbase. I don't think it's reasonable to judge me for the small number of times that I lost my cool after experiencing prolonged harassment and abuse. With that said, I'm willing to speak one-on-one with anyone that feels hurt by something I've said, and if I regret what I've said to them, I will apologize to them directly.

“YandereDev steals assets!”

In short: No, I don't.

Sometimes, when developing a game prototype, it is convenient to temporarily use placeholder assets. For example: a model from another game, or a texture that was found through Google Image Search. For a while, Yandere Simulator contained placeholder assets. It was never my intention to keep these assets in the game; they were just placeholders. I explained this in a video, back in 2017: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eLw9Ym49HnE&t=4m49s This was done purely to make the prototyping phase go by faster and smoother. Referring to this as "stealing" or "theft" would be an exaggeration.

Ever since early 2015, the majority of the game's assets have been original. 2014 was the last year when the majority of the game's assets were unoriginal.

As of now, Yandere Simulator no longer contains any temporary placeholder assets. Every single model presently in Yandere Simulator is a model that was created exclusively for Yandere Simulator, or a model that was legally purchased from an online store.

“YandereDev streams video games all day long instead of working!”

In short: No, I don't. I work on Yandere Simulator for over 8 hours every day, including on weekends. I take a 3-hour break to play video games once per day, but I'm still working on the game for more hours than a normal full-time job.

In 2014, numerous people urged me to create a Patreon, so I made one. I stated that I would make Yandere Simulator my full-time job if I could earn $1,000 per month through Patreon. I met the goal, so I started working on Yandere Simulator in a full-time capacity; 8 hours per day.

When I started earning $1,500 per month through Patreon, I decided that I should spend more hours working, in order to justify the increased income. So, I started working 6 days a week. When the Patreon income increased to $2,000, I started working 7 days a week.

When the Patreon income increased to $2,500, I started working 9 hours a day instead of 8. The Patreon continued to grow; $3,000...$4,000...eventually, it reached $5,000. I convinced myself that I had to be working 13 hours a day, 7 days a week, in order to deserve the money I was earning. If I worked any less, then I felt guilty. I was determined to avoid disappointing my patrons.

I completely sacrificed everything else in my life so that I could focus exclusively on Yandere Simulator. When my friends invited me to their weddings, I declined, because I didn't want to spend my time doing anything other than working on Yandere Sim. I dropped my hobbies, abandoned my friends, grew distant from my family, and dedicated myself entirely and completely to Yandere Simulator.

As a result, I burned myself out. Totally and completely. Even if I was sitting at my workstation with Yandere Simulator on my screen and my fingers on the keyboard, I simply wasn't getting much work done, because I was exhausted and miserable. I played video games occasionally, but it was rare.

On February 17th, 2017, I explained my situation in a YouTube video: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oF-VWc3aEsE I asked my audience if they would permit me to work less hours, and presented them with a poll. They voted "yes", so I started to work 2 hours less than previously. I also resumed one of my hobbies: streaming video games daily. I announced this in a video on March 17th, 2017: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yAC_xjrY6aI&t=5m11s Streaming video games was never meant to be some sort of hidden secret.

After I started streaming daily, I began to follow this schedule:

12:00 PM ~ 1:00 PM: Wake up, eat, shower.

1:00 PM ~ 2:00 PM: Interact with fans, fix bugs reported by fans.

2:00 PM ~ 6:00 PM: Speak with volunteers, implement new assets, fix bugs, work on upcoming features, investigate technical problems, etc.

6:00 PM ~ 6:30 PM: Eat.

6:30 PM ~ 8:00 PM: Work on the game, same as above.

8:00 PM ~ 11:00 PM: 3-hour break from work to stream video games.

11:00 PM ~ 11:30 PM: Eat.

11:30 PM ~ 4:00 AM: Work on the game, same as above.

Even though I streamed 3 hours a day, I was still working for at least 11 hours every day, and I still worked on weekends. Streaming for 3 hours a day did not significantly reduce my productivity.

At this point in time, I am no longer following that exact schedule. My Patreon earnings have declined, so I have reduced the number of hours that I am working. However, I still work 7 days a week, and only take 1 day off per month.

“ YandereDev manipulated his audience by using the words "Chill" and "Heated!"”

In short: I screwed up when I chose those words. However, I wasn't intentionally trying to be manipulative.

This is about a video from 2017: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oF-VWc3aEsE In this video, I stated that I felt pressured to work insane hours because I didn't want to disappoint the fans. I also acknowledged the possibility that perhaps I was paranoid about nothing, and that the majority of fans would be forgiving towards me if I chose to work less hours. I used the words "heated" and "chill" to describe two categories of fans; the ones who were disappointed with my development speed, and the ones who were not.

At the time, I thought that those two words were relatively neutral, and wouldn't skew poll results. However, in retrospect, I realize that these two words carry stronger connotations than I initially thought. I wish I had said "Category A" and "Category B" instead.

“ YandereDev couldn't take criticism from Mike Z!”

In short: Yes, but it was because of an extremely specific set of circumstances that will most likely never be replicated.

Mike Z is a programmer who has worked on such titles as "Skullgirls" and "Indivisible". There was a point in time when I put Mike on a huge pedastal; I idolized him and thought of him as a mythical, godlike figure. I practically worshipped him. So, when he criticized a game prototype that I developed in 2013, I took it personally, and felt really hurt. I felt like my dreams had been crushed by my hero.

That exact circumstance - idolizing someone to an unhealthy degree, and taking their words way too personally - does not happen on a daily basis. That incident does not represent me accurately.

If you're curious to know more about the situation, you can read this post: https://yanderedev.tumblr.com/post/120037118895/clearing-up-misunderstandings-part-1-mike-z

“YandereDev's fans harassed one of his critics, and YandereDev refused to condemn the harassment!”

In short: That technically happened, but you should consider the circumstances before casting judgement.

After being harassed for over a year, I eventually became very angry and bitter. One day, I heard that one of the people who harassed me was receiving harassment from Yandere Sim fans, in retaliation for what they had been doing to me.

I thought, "Wow! Sounds like karma! If you preach hate all day long, you'll eventually receive hate in return. Your actions have consequences. You can't get away with being a jerk on the Internet forever. It'll eventually bite you in the ass. It's about time this person was given a taste of their own medicine."

I was asked to condemn the harassment that this person was receiving. I didn't have the heart to do it. I had been tormented for too long, and I had grown too angry and too bitter. I could not bring myself to condemn fans who were striking back at the people who had been harassing me for over a year.

It later turned out that the person who was being harassed was in fact NOT one of the people who was tormenting me - it was just an innocent bystander. I completely reversed my stance on the matter when I learned this.

You might think it's really easy to simply say the words, "Harassment is wrong, and I condemn harassment!" But you need to put yourself in my shoes. I want you to try and imagine something - seriously, actually imagine it, as vividly as you can:

Imagine that you are the target of a harassment campaign for 12 months. A full year of people screwing with you, trying to sabotage every aspect of your life, trying to ruin whatever projects you're working on, trying to make your friends turn against you, and trying to ruin your reputaiton. After enduring that kind of treatment for an extended period of time, you'd change as a person. You wouldn't be your current self; you would slowly transformed into someone weary and miserable - but more importantly - you'd become bitter and spiteful.

You might not be able to imagine yourself ever doing something like this, but eventually, you'd actually begin to wish harm upon the people who had been abusing you. You'd eventually reach a point where you HOPE that your tormentors would start receiving the same treatment they had been giving to you. You'd want to see them brought to justice. It's not easy to say the words "Harassment is wrong!" if your life is being shattered to pieces, and you want your enemies to finally have a taste of their own medicine.

Imagine how broken a person has to be to reach a point where they can't condemn harassment, because they are so desperate for a solution that absolutely any option is on the table.That's the point I was driven to. People hammered away at me for months and months and months and months and months until I broke, and I couldn't even bring myself to say, "Stop harassing that girl."

Eventually, I did condemn the harassment, though: https://yanderedev.tumblr.com/post/166739910330/harassment

“YandereDev demonizes everyone who criticizes him!”

In short: No, I don't.

There are several categories of people involved here:

1) Fans of the game who point out a legitimate problem with the game's design and suggest an improvement. There are many occasions when I've responded, "That's a really good point, thanks!" and fixed a flaw or improved a feature based on criticism that I've read online.

2) Fans who express concerns about the game's development, but are simply asking for clarification. They ask questions in good faith, and their intention is to seek knowledge / get answers. I always respond to them and provide them with whatever clarification they seek.

3) Former fans who have become disenchanted with the game's development, and are now pessimistic about its future. Sometimes they express their disappointment in a civil way, and other times they don't. Sometimes their concerns are completely valid, and other times their concerns are a result of not understanding the nuances of game development.

4) People who have become completely convinced that I am some sort of con artist pulling off a tremendous scam. They believe that they are righteous heroes who are exposing an evil bad guy who deserves to be taken down for his heinous crimes. They are convinced I deserve no mercy or compassion because they think I'm some sort of cartoonish villain.

5) People who enjoy the act of shaming others, ridiculing others, humiliating others, gossiping about others, digging for dirt in peoples' pasts, and ruining other peoples' lives for entertainment. Their favorite activity is saying nasty things about other people. There is no component of righteousness involved; it's simply their hobby to be cruel to others over the Internet.

Categories 1, 2, and 3 are "critics". Category 4 are not "critics"; they are misguided people spreading misinformation. Category 5 are not "critics"; they are abusers who stalk, dox, and harass their targets.

“ YandereDev fired a tinyBuild programmer!”

In short: No, I didn't.

Yandere Simulator is banned from Twitch.tv, the biggest streaming website on the Internet. tinyBuild told me that if I signed up with them, they would try to get the game unbanned from Twitch. tinyBuild also offered to hire a programmer to help me develop Yandere Simulator. I thought that, if I signed up with tinyBuild, maybe the people who were harassing me would stop seeing me as a failure, and would finally back off and leave me alone. Because of these three reasons, I decided to sign a contract with tinyBuild.

(However, in the end, tinyBuild couldn't actually get the game unbanned from Twitch, and the harassment didn't actually stop.)

tinyBuild hired a professional programmer so that I could have assistance in developing the game. The programmer converted the game's code from JavaScript to C#, and upgraded the game from Unity 4 to Unity 5. Both of those things were a great help. However, after that, there wasn't really much more that he could do. In order for him to do anything significant, he would first have to re-write some of the game's core systems. I would be perfectly okay with that, but it would take several months to re-write those systems, and during that time, I wouldn't be able to produce any updates or release any new builds. We all agreed that it would be a very bad thing if I lost the ability to release updates and builds for a period of several months. So, the programmer's hands were tied, and he couldn't actually do anything significant. He still wanted to help, so made little changes to the game's code, but it was mostly just busywork that didn't actually improve the game, and it was kinda starting to interfere with my work. Things weren't working out.

The game wasn't unbanned from Twitch, the harassment didn't stop, and the programmer couldn't do anything significant. As a result, the tinyBuild partnership really wasn't benefiting anyone, so tinyBuild and I simply decided to part ways. I avoided talking about this for many months, because I was worried that I might accidentally say something that violated my contract with them, and I didn't want to cause unneccesary drama. However, I broke my silence about the matter on June 10th, 2018: https://yanderedev.wordpress.com/2018/06/10/hey-whatever-happened-with-that-whole-tinybuild-thing/

“YandereDev is a bad programmer!”

In short: No, I'm not.

There are people on the internet whose hobby is talking trash about others. To them, it's the most fun recreational activity in the world. They will look for any excuse to feel justified in hurling abuse towards another person. They will grasp at straws and make mountains out of molehills. They will exaggerate, stretch the truth, or just flat-out make things up whenever they feel like it.

People like that have targeted me. They scrutinize everything I do and look for a way to demonize me or characterize me as an evil monster. They want to maintain the mental image that they have of me, because it allows them to continue feeling justified in harassing / ridiculing me, which is their favorite activity.

When these people look at my code and identify anything that seems like a problem, they immediately jump to the conclusion that I must be a bad programmer, because they love the idea of having another excuse to say nasty things about me. However, I'm not actually a bad programmer.

For the sake of simplicity, let's say that there are two types of scripts: scripts that are always running, and scripts that only run for a single frame. When a script only runs for a single frame, it doesn't affect the game's performance at all. In these scripts, efficiency is not very important; they only need to be easy to read and easy to modify. When a script DOES run on every frame, efficiency is incredibly important. I always try my best to make such scripts as efficient as possible so that they don't have a negative impact on the game's performance.

When people identify "bad code" in my scripts, they're talking about the one-frame scripts that have no effect on gameplay. Nobody ever takes screenshots of the efficient scripts...people only take screenshots of the ones where efficiency wasn't a priority.

A bad programmer cannot make a combat minigame. A bad programmer cannot make a dialogue system. A bad programmer cannot make a shoot-em-up minigame. A bad programmer cannot create an inventory system. A bad programmer cannot create a rhythm minigame. You can't slip and fall on your keyboard and accidentally implement features like these. It requires competency. If I was a bad programmer, I never would have been able to implement any of the features that exist in Yandere Simulator. The claim that I'm a bad programmer falls apart pretty quickly.

“YandereDev ignored a suicidal girl!”

In short: Not intentionally.

There are weird people who record my video game streams for the sole purpose of trying to catch me saying something embarassing. To avoid providing these people with any new material, I try to ignore any sort of drama or touchy subject that comes up in my chatroom while I'm streaming.

At some point in time, I looked over at my chatroom and realized that people were having a discussion that somehow involved the topic of suicide. I wasn't sure what they were talking about, but I knew that it was drama, and I knew that if I commented on what they were discussing, my stalkers would have new material for their channels, so I decided to completely ignore whatever conversation was occuring in the chat room.

Much later, I learned the reason why my chatroom was discussing the subject of suicide. Apparently, a girl had been expressing suicidal feelings in my chatroom.

If I wasn't constantly being harassed by weirdos on the Internet, then I never would have made the decision to ignore my chat at that point in time.

“YandereDev doesn't credit his volunteers!”

In short: Yes, I do.

Yandere Simulator has a "Credits" scene that is accessed from the main menu. As you might imagine, it's dedicated entirely to crediting people for their work. But, outside of the game, there are two reasons why I usually don't publicly mention the names of volunteers:

I worry that if I make volunteer names public, Internet trolls will contact the volunteers and harass them in the same way that they harass me.

Sometimes volunteers want to be anonymous, without telling me ahead of time. There are times when I've credited a volunteer, then received an e-mail within minutes, saying, "Please don't credit me!! Please remove my username!!" so, I usually default to not publicly mentioning anyone's name, just to avoid this situation.

But, if a volunteer asks me to credit them, I credit them as they wish.

“YandereDev wants to include a rape feature in Yandere Simulator!”

In short: No, I don't.

Over a year ago, I wrote a post on Reddit about taking care of your kidnapped victims by feeding them: https://imgur.com/N4veApq.png

Someone photoshopped my post and replaced the word "feed" with "rape": https://imgur.com/OS1NV0w.png

“YandereDev deletes comments!”

In short: Yes, but not for the reasons that you might think.

Go back and read the opening paragraph of "YandereDev is rude to his fans." Think about what I've been through over the past two years. When you're going through that kind of abuse, there are three thoughts that dominate your mind:

"Why is this happening to me?"

"How can I stop this?"

"I feel powerless."

It's relatively easy to answer the first question. People feel justified in treating me like garbage because they have been exposed to "Anti-YandereDev" culture; a culture that teaches people to believe that I am an evil villain who deserves to be punished and abused. This culture is created by nasty comments on the Internet that depict me as a monster.

Nasty comments lead to a culture of hate, which leads to real-life consequences like constant harassment and abuse. The only way to stop the problem is to eliminate the source of the "Anti-YandereDev" culture; comments that mischaracterize me, demonize me, and portray me as something I'm not.

If I delete comments, I'll be accused of censorship. If I don't delete comments, people will read those comments and then feel inspired to harass me and abuse me. Both outcomes suck. This is a lose-lose situation with no positive outcome. I don't really think it's reasonable to blame me for deleting comments that will inspire a hateful Anti-YandereDev culture of abuse and harassment.

“YandereDev blocks and bans people for harmless criticism!”

In short: No, I don't.

There are Discord servers dedicated to stalking / harassing / doxing people. Some of these servers are targeting me. Some of my friends visit these servers and tell me what the people inside are planning to do to me next. When these people attempt to post on my subreddit or my Discord, they get banned immediately because we already know what they are planning to do.

These people assume that they were banned for posting something harmless, but they were actually banned because we were fully aware of their true intentions.

“YandereDev wants to kill his parents!”

In short: No, I don't.

I was extremely surprised to learn that, when I was a teenage kid, I apparently wrote a post about being so angry with my parents that I wanted them to die. I have absolutely no memory of ever feeling that way towards my parents, but since the post exists, I guess I must have felt that way at some point in time.

That post was written when I was a teenage kid. "Grrrrr, I hate my parents, I wish they were dead!" is the sort of thing that an edgy teenage kid would say. This doesn't seem like a reflection of who I am; it seems like a reflection of what edgy teenage kids are like.

That post feels alien and foreign, like words that were written by a completely different person. I honestly have no idea what to say about it, other than the obvious: it's from over 11 years ago, and it doesn't reflect how I feel in modern day at all. It seems absurd that there are actually people who judge me for it.

“YandereDev wrote an erotic story about rape!”

In short: No, I didn't.

I once wrote a fanfic set in the Fallout universe, which contains slavery. The protagonist of the fanfic was a slave who was being sexually abused. The slave's owner was portrayed as a nasty, evil, ugly person, and he died a gruesome, undignified death. The rape scenes were not meant to be erotic; they were meant to reflect the disgusting nature of sexual abuse, and also meant to villify the slave's owner.

I stopped writing the story in order to focus my time on Yandere Simulator. There is no way for me to prove this, but the plot of the story was going to involve the slave becoming a vigilante that travels around the world, hunting and killing rapists and slave owners. Even though I wrote a story that villifies rapists and was going to be about the genocide of rapists, people summarize the story as, "YandereDev wrote an erotic rape story!" which is as far from the truth as possible.

“YandereDev portrayed himself as a cute, innocent girl in order to gain sympathy!”

In short: No, I didn't.

This is about my "Hate and Shame" video, which features a female protagonist.

The point of the video was to ask people to imagine themselves in my position. YouTube's analytics page tells me that the majority of my audience is female. I decided to make the protagonist of the video a female character so that it would be easier for my audience to relate to her.

“YandereDev portrays his critics as demons!”

In short: No, I don't.

In my "Hate and Shame" video, I was not describing critics. I was describing a group of people who stalk, dox, and harass others for fun. I don't think that stalkers/doxxers/harassers should be portrayed with dignity, so I depicted them as grey-colored inhuman creatures. I called them "gremlins" because "stalkers/doxxers/harassers" is way too many syllables.

Around 11 minutes and 57 seconds into the video, I depicted the protagonist receiving feedback from a critic. The critic is depicted in a neutral way; not as an inhuman monster.

“YandereDev spends all day reading e-mails instead of working on the game!”

In short: No, I don't.

In early 2016, I was receiving an overwhelming amount of e-mail from very young children. The majority of these e-mails were very cringey and annoying. I didn't bother replying to them; I only used e-mail to speak with volunteers, have business discussions, and review bug reports. However, it was still irritating to see my inbox always filling up with cringey messages from little kids.

Eventually, I decided to try and do something about it. I tried to convince all the young children to leave me alone by making a video depicting stupid e-mails as the worst threat to Yandere Simulator's development. Unfortunately, it didn't really work; it only increased the amount of dumb e-mails that I was getting. It also caused a lot of people to develop the misconception that I spend every day doing nothing but replying to stupid messages.

The last time I complained about e-mails was over 2 years ago. I shouldn't need to spell this out, but: E-mails are not a problem for the game's development.

“YandereDev is intentionally prolonging the game's development to make as much money as possible from Patreon!”

In short: No, I'm not.

I rarely mention my Patreon. I've uploaded around 150 videos to my YouTube channel, and I think I've only mentioned my Patreon about 3~4 times in total. If my intention was to milk the Patreon, wouldn't I constantly be mentioning it in my YouTube videos?

I don't mention the Patreon in my video descriptions. I don't mention the Patreon in my blog posts. I don't put a link to Patreon on the main menu of the game. If my intention was to milk the Patreon, wouldn't I be trying to draw more attention to it? I think that most people are actually completely unaware that I even have a Patreon.

If my intention was to make lots of money, I would:

Not make a game with controversial content

Promote my merchandise at every opportunity

Already be selling the game as an early access title

However, I'm not doing any of these things. I'm actually doing the direct opposite of all of these things.

It doesn't make any sense whatsoever to conclude that I'm intentionally prolonging the game's development. There is no person on earth who wants Yandere Simulator to be finished more than I do; nothing would make me happier than to see the game come out as quickly as possible. However, I refuse to rush the project, because I don't want the quality of the game to suffer.

The game is taking a long time to develop because I'm burned out, because I'm mentally and physically exhausted, and because I'm the target of a harassment campaign. You need to realize that going through the experience of being character assassinated will have a strong negative impact on your enthusiasm, motivation, and productivity. It's simply impossible to feel inspired to work hard on a project when you feel like your future has been completely destroyed.

[diningrheum]

When it all comes tumbling down…gratitude!

I know my last post said that this month was SUPPOSED to be all about gratitude (and I promise I will still try to incorporate a little bit towards the end) but I’m struggling with it at this point, and I just want to make this blog REAL and HONEST…or else what’s the point of it.  Not to sound like one of those anti-depressant commercials that you see on TV, but most days in real life, I feel like I’ve had to wear a mask.  I don’t want my parents to worry, so I only tell them the good news about my RA, but don’t tell them about some of my lingering fears.  I didn’t want to disappoint my boyfriend, so I took a bunch of painkillers and hopped on the bike out of fear that the pain of my rheumatoid arthritis would impact my activity levels to a point that he would care less for me.  And it’s all driven me to this point….a breaking point where I feel backed into a corner and I just want to come punching and kicking and screaming my way out and say “THIS IS ME, DAMNIT!  This is who I am!  Love me or stop loving me, but I just can’t take hiding it anymore!”

The past year or so has been a complete dumpster fire! A (not so) brief recap:

At the end of the summer in 2017, my boyfriend and I decided to take the next step after almost 5 years together and move in together.  It was my first time living with a significant other, so I was super nervous but also really excited. Things seems to be going really well….for about the first month.  And then….well…something unexpected that I’m afraid caused irreparable harm to the relationship happened.  This is something that I fear I will deeply regret every single day for the rest of my life. To be fair to him, even I did not anticipate the depth of the depression and guilt that I would feel, but I had hoped for a little more compassion that the decision would be a so difficult for me, both emotionally and physically.  I have never been suicidal, but many days I felt that I don’t deserve to live after what I had done.  This may seem like an extreme reaction and perhaps it is, and it was one I was ill prepared for.  It was something that I never told a single other person about.  He was the only one who knew, and therefore the only person I could trust to understand these feelings.  And it felt like a betrayal, when he just pretended like it never happened. It felt like a further betrayal when he failed to follow through on the steps he was supposed to take to help put my mind at ease about the situation.

In January, my symptoms began to make themselves more pronounced.  Joint pain went from “ok, I just slept weird” to ” hmm….something strange is going on here.  I don’t think this is normal.” It was enough that it inspired me to take the first food sensitivity test to look for a possible culprit to my pain.  Looking back, I still sometimes wonder if all the stress of the previous autumn were in some way linked to my onset of RA. I’ve read many accounts of trauma triggering an autoimmune disease, so if a car accident can trigger it, than I’m almost certain that an unplanned pregnancy and then being suddenly not pregnant anymore can certainly do it.  I mean, the rollercoaster of emotions between guilt and relief alone could probably do the trick, but the crazy hormone changes that the body goes through, first by getting pregnant and then in response to the demise of the fetus are not to be dismissed.

Also in January, my grandfather passed away suddenly.  On Christmas Day, he was going to a friend’s Christmas party, then by New Years he was checking into the hospital.  I never expected that he would never check out and go back home.  Then, at the end on June, I got news that my other grandfather had passed away, less than 6 months between them.  Two great men, just gone from my life during a time full of uncertainty.

Next, came my diagnosis in July.  And with it, rather than total relief or optimism that I’d finally start to get the treatment I needed, I felt more guilt.  Guilt that my boyfriend wasn’t getting the active girlfriend he thought he was moving in with.  What if I didn’t get better?  We had just moved in together and I got the diagnosis on the one-year anniversary of our closing date.  This wasn’t what he had signed up for…an invalid for a girlfriend.  At a time when I should’ve been focused on my own health, I was worried that my boyfriend wouldn’t want to be with me anymore.  Up to that point it wasn’t as if things were going swimmingly in our relationship either.  I’m not great at adjusting to change, and even though moving in together was something I wanted, I’m a weirdly private person and now it was impossible to hide my weird little quirks, like my embarrassing Netflix queue of sappy romcoms or the stupid goofy games I obsessively play on my phone or my cookbook hoarding habit. Instead of embracing it and trusting that it wouldn’t change his feelings for me, I got nervous about him finding out.  I remember more than once, he would ask about what I did on an evening that we didn’t spend together, and I got instantly defensive and secretive about it and said “Nothing! Geeez…why do you have to know so bad, you control freak!”  Truth: I binge watched some episodes of a CW show or played games on my phone all night long or danced around and lip synced in the living room while blasting the Guardians of the Galaxy soundtrack.

I’m not saying he was completely blameless either.  He had some expectations of me that I felt were a little unreasonable, like a quota on how many times a week he felt we should be having sex (way to suck all the romance and spontaneity out of it).  And he wasn’t always perfectly compassionate.  Before my diagnosis, he made a comment on how I wasn’t really working out any more.  Earlier in our relationship, I used to go with him to the gym, but as my hands and feet started to hurt I was less and less into it.  I know it disappointed him, but it wasn’t exactly my fault.  He asked what my new fitness routine was, and I angrily shot back “Right now I’m lucky if I can walk to and from work without pain”  Then he shot back that I needed to come up with something because otherwise I would get fat and he couldn’t see himself with someone “not fit.”  It was hurtful!  I didn’t choose to be sick, and I was trying my best to overcome my depression, but I felt like he was suggesting that I somehow planned this disease and its onset to happen after we were living together as a means to trap him! Again, this was before I knew what was wrong with me and how or if I could get back to normal.  And the tensions kept mounting and the rift between us kept growing.  We’d fight more often and every time we did, he’d throw in a subtle or not so subtle suggestion that we break up, like “Things won’t work out unless you……”  I got really defensive every time and just shut down or exploded in anger at him, which never helped the situation.

Finally came today.  A brief background:  I grew up and live in a very liberal area of the country, and have always tended to lean a little more moderate-conservative. Being election day, I put a 24-hour temporary profile picture up that said “I voted Republican.” Being someone in a liberal echo chamber, I often keep these opinions to myself to avoid debates that never tend to lead anywhere and in my experience have always results in name calling, but everyone else so proudly declares that they vote and also proudly declares how they vote, either online or in daily conversation, so why can’t I just because my opinion is a little different?  I’m just as proud of my choice and the hopefulness it brings me for freedom and I didn’t want to continue to hide it.  My boyfriend was not happy, and he took it as a personal attack on him and said my posting it endangered his relationships with others.  It felt like the ultimate betrayal.  I trusted him to know me and love me for who I am, and encourage me to feel comfortable about it.  I’m tired of hiding everything….my pregnancy, my illness, even this blog- a blog that no one in my real life knows about, including him (I planned it that way because I felt like I could be more honest with strangers that if I knew my audience and was worried about how they might read what I was writing).  Instead, I felt like he was controlling me and censoring MY facebook profile and MY opinions because of how it made HIM look. So I erupted in a series of angry texts back at him.  He asked to meet for lunch to discuss.  When we did, I erupted even more.  Eventually, when I’d lost steam on my tirade, he said that he was sorry but that our relationship was over!  So there it was: a 24 hour facebook profile pic was the straw that broke the camel’s back.  I feel so many things right now: angry, devastated, remorseful, and confused!

On some level, things with us haven’t exactly been healthy for a while, but then on the other hand, I’m finally starting to get a handle on my RA symptoms and I felt like things with us were starting to improve.  Two days ago we were talking about going to the store to start planning out cabinets and countertops for a kitchen remodel in our house.  And last night, we had just gotten a new comforter for our bed after struggling with a duvet that was always spilling out of its cover because of a few missing buttons.  I was really hopeful that we were going to be able to put all the bad things in past behind us and start to look forward and hopeful for a festive holiday season where we could finally get a reprieve from all the past year or so’s troubles. It felt like we were this-close to re-establishing peace in our relationship and if we could come out of the other side of this year, maybe a little battered, but still intact then we’d have the strength to get through anything together.  But I guess all of the setbacks of this year took their toll, and now I’m forced to find a time to start packing up our shared home and move back in with my parents.

So, I said I would end this post with gratitude, since that is supposed to be the theme of my posts this month.  It’s really hard to feel grateful for much when the man you love just gave up on you and broke your heart, but I am grateful that I do have other people that are in my corner.  My parents are loving and kind and will welcome me into their home to stay as long as I need. And not having to move into an apartment alone is probably good.  My parents will be caring and compassionate that I’ve just probably lost the love of my life (I know most people say that, but even though we’ve been together for about 5 and a half years, our story goes back all the way to the fall of 2000, so it feels like 18 years of my live—my ENTIRE adult life– has just fallen apart) but will also be the tough love I need to try to navigate moving on.  I don’t have a particularly large friend group, but the ones I do have I know love me unconditionally.  Even one of my friends, who I know disagrees with me on all aspects of politics really came through for me today.  I’ve been able to come clean with those people about last fall’s pregnancy and its aftermath and they’ve all been overwhelmingly comforting and supportive in ways I hadn’t expected. Now I only wish I had told them sooner, so I wouldn’t have had a year of self loathing over the whole thing and guilt about hiding it from everyone.  They were understanding of my reasons for wanting to keep it private and were truly there for me.  And will truly be there for me going forward.

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[iheartsurveys]

159

1. What was the last thing you ate? Parmesan bread bites from dominos

2. What kind of guys are you usually attracted to? I don’t really have a set type, per se. They’ve all had their similarities and differences. Have a sense of humor, be sweet, have things in common with me are the initial pre req’s that they’ve had but if you go deeper there’s differences

3. What’s the stupidest thing that’s happened to you that ended a friendship? In middle school this girl that lived down the street from me stopped being my friend because I wanted to ride the bus and not have her mom drive me to school anymore

4. What’s the longest amount of time you’ve had sex for? Do people count that? That seems weird…unless like it’s obvious and ends super fast lol

5. What reality shows do you watch? The bachelor/ette, kuwtk sometimes, I’ve been really into big brother this season, I used to watch teen mom and the real housewives in college but haven’t really since moving home

6. Post a video of yourself here: I’m doing this on my phone and that’s way too much effort

7. Where do you work? Technically from home, for a govt contractor

8. Have you ever gone up to a car thinking it was yours and tried to get in it? I didn’t try to get in but I have gotten close to a car I’ve thought was mine before

9. Where do you buy most of your clothes? These days, target and old navy

10. Are there any people on xanga that you’d like to actually know? Xanga isn’t a thing anymore is it? I don’t think I had one when it was anyway

11. If you were very intelligent and had the capability to have any profession, what would you like to be? I wish I didn’t suck at math because I’d love to be a forensic scientist. That was my dream for a while in middle school, and I attempted to minor in it, but it requires some difficult math, etc and yeah I switched gears

12. What’s your most irrational fear? Eye ball things still scare me. And omg what’s it called when you see like little hole clusters and it freaks you out because that’s so me ugh even just thinking about it I want to vom

13. How many radio stations do you listen to? I listen to xm more than the radio these days, I have like 18 stations saved but listen to mainly 5 or 6

14. What kind of music do they have? Some are today’s hits, and then I have the 90s, 2000s, and a few rock stations

15. What bank do you use? A bank

16. Would you rather go to Greece or Hawaii? Both but I’d go to Greece first

17. Musicals: Yay or Nah? I enjoy a few

18. What have you eaten today? I’ve eaten like shit today don’t judge me…mini donuts, chicken nuggets and fries, pizza and parm bites lollllll oops. And then I wonder why I don’t lose weight…I did work out today so that’s slightly better but not much

19. Have you ever called in and voted for someone on american idol or another show like it? Yes I loved American idol when it was still good way way back in the day

20. What size bra do you wear? 36B

21. What’s your myspace URL? I don’t even remember

22. What do all your saved texts say? I don’t save texts intentionally, my phone just keeps them all. << same

23. Do you still talk to your exs? One, kind of. We don’t text or anything but we have mutual friends so we occasionally see each other and we talk then

24. Is your accent common for where you live? I guess? I don’t think I have an accent and I don’t notice anyone else in my area with one too but to others that probably means we sound the same

25. Do you support your city/state sports teams? I’m from NY and live in VA and tbh I kind of support teams from both. Both baseball teams I like but lean more towards the mets, and I like both hockey teams but lean towards the capitals. I don’t really care about football enough but I say I’m a jets fan just because.

26. How did you meet your boyfriend? Single af

27. Are your parents constantly breathing down your neck? Not really

28. Have you ever cheated on a significant other? What did you do? Nope

29. Is there someone that’s always there for you, no matter what? My mom

30. What does your watch look like? I don’t have a watch

31. Is there any beauty product that you like so much that you’d recommend it to others? If you’re like me and want huge eyelashes but don’t want to wear falsies, cover girl the super sizer mascara is bomb for that

32. What time do you go to bed on work nights? School nights? I start my job on Wednesday!!!! I’m so fucking excited it’s been a long time coming. Idk if I’ll have a set time I go to bed, maybe a little earlier than I do now. I’ve been going to bed more towards 1 lately and I’ll probably try to switch to 11-12

33. Does your pet mean everything to you? We have 5 and I love them all

34. What’s the stupidist thing someone has messaged you about? No clue

35. What are the next concerts you’ll be going to? I’d love to see Lorde but she hasn’t announced dates for the US yet. The only set for sure plan I have is seeing Harry Styles next June <3 he’s coming around in October too and I’d really like to go but tickets are still fucking expensive

36. Do you have a movie watchers card? I’ve never even heard of that

37. What was the last conversation you had with your best friend about? Dogs, typical for us lol

38. Are you one of those people that LOVE to hug others? Hugging is fine, I’m not like anti hugging but I’m also not like omg hugs!!!!, ya know?

39. How much is gas where you live? $2 something

40. What’s a restaurant near you that has interesting food? What is “interesting”? We definitely have a variety of cuisines if that’s what you mean but calling foreign food interesting is kind of rude… maybe I’m reading this wrong idk

41. Do you use post it notes often? I did in college, and I just bought some for work so I probably will again

42. What’s the most money you’ve spent on a concert ticket? Too much tbh. Not like insane amounts but yeah idk at least 100. Can you believe people spend 1000s on concert tickets?! Even if I was rich I could never bring myself to do that

43. Do you like mexican food? Love

44. What size pants do you wear? It varies by store by usually like an 8

45. Some annoying songs are: Something just like this by the chainsmokers, that’s what I like by Bruno mars, shape of you by ed sheeran, stay by zedd, literally every song they overplay on the radio. I enjoy pop music and today’s hits but damn when they play a song to death it makes me hate it so much

46. Is there a pool in your backyard? No

47. Do your parents trust you to stay the night at your boyfriend’s house? Once again, single, but if I wasn’t, I’m 23 sooooo yeah. I think they would though, well at least my mom, I don’t tell my dad about stuff like that as I’ve said before

48. How do you like your steak? Medium

49. Don’t you just hate running into people you know? If I don’t like them then yes but if I do it’s fine

50. If you weren’t born in the US, how long have you lived here? Born in NY

[nwolf51-blog]

Chris Schwartz: Cedar Valley LGBT Activist

When people think of LGBTQ activism in the Cedar Valley, one name will often come to mind: Chris Schwartz. Schwartz is a founder and organizer of Cedar Valley Pridefest, the chairperson of the Iowa chapter of Americans for Democratic Action, and he's currently serving his first term as one of five Black Hawk County Supervisors. Schwartz is the first openly gay elected official in Northeast Iowa, and the fifth to serve anywhere in Iowa.

The LGBTQ community and the issues thereof have been a topic of interest for Schwartz for many years. "I first got started in LGBT activism my freshman year of high school when I gave my first speech on LGBT rights. That was 23 years ago," he said. "When I really got involved was after we had the marriage equality ruling in Iowa. I was working for Americans for Democratic Action at the time, and even though we are not specifically an LGBT rights group, we got involved in the lobbying effort to make sure a constitutional amendment was not introduced in the state legislature that would overturn that ruling. We lobbied very heavily and were credited with helping to deliver two of the final democratic votes that we needed to prevent that constitutional amendment from being introduced."

He is also very concerned about proper education for LGBTQ people and for the broader community about LGBTQ issues. "We've [Americans for Democratic Action] organized countless educational events, whether on transgender issues or school bullying issues," he said. "As one of the founders of Cedar Valley Pridefest, which we are now in our sixth year, we've really stayed true to our mission of not just having a celebration but also being a really educational event, so the areas I head up for Pridefest are ... the education series ... the teachings that happen at the festival, making sure that we've got the education/advocacy component so that it's not just a bunch of people getting together and having a good time. It's advocating and furthering the state of our community."

As a founder and organizer of Pridefest, Schwartz has a very unique perspective on what the festival brings to the Cedar Valley. "I'll never forget that very first Pridefest. We didn't know how it was going to go, how people would react. We thought we'd be lucky if we had 500 people there, and we had close to 3,000 people there," he said. "The thing that really struck me was one of the shifts I was working at the gate as people were coming in and seeing all these young high school students. They were coming from not just schools here in Waterloo and Cedar Falls, but schools from all around. We were tracking their zip code, so we knew where people are coming from. I realized that this is probably the first time that they were in an environment surrounded by people like them or who supported them, where they could really express who they were and be comfortable and know that this was a safe place for them. It almost brought me to tears, thinking about what it was like when I was in high school, it was radically different; it's changed really rapidly. For me it shows triumph of our community but also resilience for our community and determination to keep fighting and moving forward."

Schwartz described his feelings in 2009 and 2015 when marriage equality was recognized in Iowa and across the United States, respectively. "It was a beautiful moment. I remember I joined an impromptu rally that took place at the University of Northern Iowa to celebrate it when it happened. It was a great moment of personal relief for me because it's not something I thought I'd see, but the dynamics started changing very rapidly," he said. "And then in 2015 when we finally had the ruling that made marriage equality go nationwide, it was almost an overwhelming sense of pride, and it really made me reflect all the people that came before me and fought so hard, literally fought and gave up their lives, people that died in the HIV epidemic and those that still continue to die, but also made me want to honor everyone that worked so hard for generations before we came along. I think it's important that the people my age and people younger don't take any of this for granted because nothing's guaranteed."

Even though marriage equality has been achieved throughout the United States, Schwartz recognized issues for the LGBTQ community that are still worth fighting for. "I think there's still some 30 or so states around the country that don't have those protections [for LGBTQ people written into the civil rights code]. Folks can be evicted from their home or apartment. They can be denied housing applications, denied jobs, fired from jobs, denied services, all because they're a member of the LGBT community," he said. "Transgender rights are still very much lagging behind, and it's not just the legal rights, but also how transgender individuals are perceived by society. We need to be constantly educating people about that and opening people's hearts and opening people's minds. We still have issues like adoption rights in many states; same-sex couples are not guaranteed adoption rights in every single state, which is sad for all the children that are wasting away in the foster care system around the country. We need to eliminate those hurdles. Additionally, just because we have marriage equality now doesn't mean we're guaranteed to keep it. It's going to be hard for them to get rid of it. It'd be a big fight, but we're seeing how destructive Supreme Court picks can be. The idea that [Trump]'s going to have an opportunity, if he's not impeached first, that he could appoint one or two or three more, that would have a devastating effect on LGBTQ rights and really the rights of all disenfranchised and marginalized people around the country."

It's obvious that there's still a long way to go in this country for the perception of LGBTQ individuals, and it was no more obvious than last October when Schwartz's home was vandalized with gay slurs and anti-gay sentiments. "It was three weeks before the election. I came out of our house that morning where my fiance and I live, and I saw that some of the campaign signs had been spray painted with black paint. Then I got further outside, and I saw one of my campaign signs had the word 'fag' spray painted on it, which was really upsetting and shocking," he said. "Then I turned around and saw this Leviticus quote referenced on our front door, which basically reads 'a man who lies with a man shall be stoned.' We took it as a death threat. The police agreed with us that it was a death threat, and they classified it as a hate crime. It stayed unsolved. Even today it's still kind of unnerving knowing that there is someone or some group of individuals who would threaten our lives just for being gay. The response from the community was overwhelmingly positive, except from the hatemongers that incited that in the first place."

Unfortunately for Schwartz, this was not the beginning of hateful acts against him at his home. "That wasn't the first incident. That was the first incident that we reported. The May before that, I had two chihuahuas, and I had been on campus campaigning with one of them, the smaller one, Nico. I put a photo of her up on my campaign page. I get back home and her brother who's a little bit bigger than her started acting weird. It was clear something was wrong, so I called our vet, and the vet hours were closing, so they said try to get him to drink water, try to get him to throw up. We searched our yard, and someone had thrown a bag of antifreeze into our front yard," he said. "He chewed it up and ultimately he died that night. He made it to the morning. we were waiting for the vet to open so he could get back in there. He was having seizures all throughout the night and he died that morning. We didn't know exactly what happened. We didn't want to sound like we were exploiting the death of my dog. It was already sad enough when it happened, but bags of antifreeze don't just blow into your yard randomly. It was the same day I posted a picture of the other one, and it really seemed like we were targeted. I don't know if we were targeted for being outspoken progressives or targeted for being gay or what happened."

Regardless of the hate crimes committed against Schwartz, he pushes on in his fight for LGBTQ rights. As chair of Iowa Americans for Democratic Action, he has access to many resources which allow him to help the Iowa LGBTQ community even more. "With Americans for Democratic Action, I really feel blessed to work for such a historic organization. This is the 70th year of the organization, and ADA was actually the first organization that wasn't specifically LGBTQ to speak out on behalf of gay rights," he said. "It started during the McCarthy trials, when people who were either LGBT or perceived to be were fired from their jobs and barred from working in the government. Americans for Democratic Action was the first to speak out against the persecution. We have a 70-year history of fighting for LGBTQ rights, so they give me the ability to work on all the rallies that I mentioned before, and to be that advocate that spends time lobbying on these kinds of issues since it's something that's been there since the start of ADA."

Schwartz also uses resources available to him as Black Hawk County Supervisor. "I'm working with our county health department because Black Hawk County has alarmingly high STD rates, and those disproportionately impact the LGBTQ community, and so I'm really trying to help them connect with all the ways that they can communicate with the LGBTQ population and make sure the services that we provide at the county are reaching all the disenfranchised people out there, including the LGBTQ community."

[cyclicreferenceerror]

Chronomorph

This post is based on Archimedes’s Chronophone and its Motivations, which I urge you to read now if you haven’t. Properly understood, the chronophone teaches us why it was so hard for Archimedes to arrive at beliefs that our own culture holds to be obvious (like “slavery is wrong”).

I like it because it could be a powerful tool to derive an intuitive measure of the change-inducing potential of an idea. To come up with cognitive strategies you could transmit to Archimedes to get him to do the things you consider good, you have to think of the things future generations would consider obvious and good, but which our own generation thinks incorrect and possibly outrageous. And in reverse, it serves as a test to measure the cultural impact of a cognitive strategy you’re following. Talking about “prediction markets” is sufficiently non-obvious in our culture that it might get Archimedes to, say, think about tax reforms, but getting him to change his mind about slavery would require coming up with something worth centuries of progress in our time. “Make money by inventing technological gadgets” is so obvious in our time that it would probably just come out as “conquer enemy territories”.

On first glance, it would seem that the notion of transmitting cognitive strategies rather than beliefs is simple enough to understand:

You cannot suggest, for example, that women should have the vote.  Maybe you could persuade Archimedes of Syracuse of the issue, and maybe not; but it is a moot point, the chronophone will not transmit the advice.  Or rather, it will transmit the advice, but it will come out as:  "Install a tyrant of great personal virtue, such as Hiero II, under whose rule Syracuse experienced fifty years of peace and prosperity."  That's how the chronophone avoids transmitting overly anachronistic information - it transmits cognitive strategies rather than words.  If you follow the policy of "Check my brain's memory to see what my contemporary culture recommends as a wise form of political organization", what comes out of the chronophone is the result of Archimedes following the same policy of looking up in his brain what his era lauds as a wise form of political organization.

However, the problem with transmitting cognitive strategies instead of beliefs is that a cognitive strategy is derived from other strategies, and that chain usually has many levels. For instance, if I want to transmit “donate money to an effective charity”, what cognitive strategy do I transmit? How do I even identify my own cognitive strategy here? To oversimplify it a bit, it looks like:

Belief: “earn to give to the most effective charities”

strategy 0: “read widely to understand current thinking on effective altruism”

strategy A1: “seek to help the less privileged”

strategy A2: “understand my own (axiomatic) morality, whatever its origins”

strategy B1: “apply rational strategies since they help me win”

…

It’s cognitive strategies all the way down. Multiple strategies can combine (creating branching) to give rise to a new strategy, and strategies may feed back into each other (creating loops). Each of these levels will have a different cultural equivalent in Archimedes’ time because they have different cultural status in our time, so how does the chronophone select which level to transmit? Or in less abstract terms, how do you really figure out the result of trying to communicate a particular piece of advice over the chronophone? Saying “donate money to an effective charity” could be arrived at using any (and probably all) of the cognitive strategies “try the advice of the last reasonable-sounding book you read”, “follow your culture’s best stance on your favourite school of ethics”, or even “figure out something useful to say into a chronophone”, all of which would produce different results at the other end.

To really get at the heart of what powers the chronophone, you need to bypass Archimedes altogether. Imagine that our scientists, inspired by the chronophone, invent a kind of temporal manipulation device (“chronomorph” for short) which lets you manipulate physical reality across time! If the chronomorph is focused on you, then whatever actions you take here will be transmitted across to an ancient version of you that will dutifully obey.

Unfortunately, the chronomorph is subject to the same restrictions of time travel as the chronophone, so actions are translated through culturally equivalent cognitive strategies (“chronomorphed” for short).

The important thing to understand about the chronophone is that it is functionally equivalent to the chronomorph – that is, no more or less powerful. If you can describe a strategy into the chronophone that would come out the other end as something that’s actually useful for Archimedes to hear, then you can always execute the same strategy in your time and achieve the same amount of change-relative-to-your-culture (“chronomorphic delta” for short). As a consequence, you can test the impact of anything you want to say into a chronophone by instead focusing a chronomorph on yourself, and actually executing that strategy to measure its delta in your own culture.

This makes it much clearer what the result of saying “donate to an effective charity” into a chronophone would be. If you actually did this in our culture, it’s sufficiently non-obvious that the marginal benefit you achieve can be quite large. As a cultural ideal, if large numbers of rich people started paying attention to this, any measure of lives saved and improved would show massive gains. Yet it’s something that’s been around for a while without really taking off, suggesting that people don’t respond to merely being aware of it. It also faces valid criticisms. Any belief that comes out of the chronophone will hold the same promises and be beset by the same problems, and that’s all you need to know. It almost doesn’t matter what cognitive strategy is used to arrive at this belief; indeed you can back-calculate the common strategy that, when applied in the two cultures, gives rise to those two beliefs.

When we say that a chronophone transmits strategies instead of beliefs, we’re obliquely getting at what’s really conserved – the chronomorphic delta – the impact that believing in, talking about, and implementing a cognitive strategy has.

So what kinds of beliefs/strategies are good candidates to transmit through a chronophone? Or equivalently, what actions should you take today, that could be chronomorphed into desirable outcomes in Archimedes’s time?

A basic principle of the chronophone is that to get nonobvious output, you need nonobvious input.  If you say something that is considered obvious in your home culture, it comes out of the chronophone as something that is considered obvious in Archimedes's culture.

Non-obvious is often a synonym for “weird”, “nerdy”, “socially unacceptable”, or even “subversive”, so the budding chronophonist must be prepared to cheerfully accept these labels. If you try to seek out especially those new ideas that are ignored, rejected, or suppressed by the mainstream, that’s probably fertile ground for finding good candidates. The chronophone is the bridge that transports the horror of slavery in Archimedes’s time into our own time, transmitted through invariant chronomorphic ignorance.

In Archimedes's time, slavery was thought right and proper; in our time, it is held an abomination.  If, today, you need to argue that slavery is bad, you can invent all sorts of moral arguments which lead to that conclusion - all sorts of justifications leap readily to mind.  If you could talk to Archimedes of Syracuse directly, you might even be able to persuade him to your viewpoint (or not).  But the really odd thing is that, at some point in time, someone must have turned against slavery - gone from pro-slavery to anti-slavery - even though they didn't start out wanting to persuade themselves against slavery.  By the time someone gets to the point of wanting to construct persuasive anti-slavery arguments, they must have already turned against slavery.  If you know your desired moral destination, you are already there.  Thus, that particular cognitive strategy - searching for ways to persuade people against slavery - can't explain how we got here from there, how Western culture went from pro-slavery to anti-slavery.

This gives us another clue: “searching for ways to persuade people against slavery” wouldn’t work in Archimedes time just as “searching for ways to persuade people against… umm… X” wouldn’t work in our time, because we don’t know what X is. If you wanted to chronomorph “figure out slavery is bad”, the action you would need to take here couldn’t be anything you already know is right. You have to start with your best guesses, and take step by blind step, always trying to course-correct, without knowing your destination.

So how could Archimedes have figured out that he should be anti-slavery, if he didn’t know his destination? How can you figure out truths about your world when you don’t already know them, when you don’t know others know, and when no one knows?

At a minimum, you need to admit your own ignorance, and acknowledge explicitly that many, if not most things in your culture will be recognised by future generations as bad. But you can’t stop there – the proper use of humility is to take specific actions in anticipation of your own errors.

How would you behave today if you knew you were being chronomorphed?

    Footnotes:

So how could Archimedes have figured out that he should be anti-slavery, if he didn’t know his destination?

Perhaps the first step would have been acknowledging explicitly that there were probably in his world that were non-obvious to his culture, and that future generations would recognise them as such. Then he could actively seek out philosophers of his time who were considered subversive, and try to understand their thinking. He could have been more wary of mainstream ideas, prodding and poking at them until one rung hollow. He could have enlisted his smartest friends to help, but also tried to talk to the least obvious sources, even a slave. Maybe if he biased more towards the non-obvious, towards the fringe, it would have helped.

This strategy isn’t the best, and maybe not even good enough (given how deeply entrenched slavery was), but it’s a start. In our time, the closest equivalent I can think of is something like CFAR.

[thesinglesjukebox]

TONES AND I - THE KIDS ARE COMING

[3.56]

...to take back everything the boomers stole...

Iain Mew: Taking on the olds with a combination of youthful energy and possibility and an undercurrent of menace isn't a bad idea, and there's plenty of material Tones and I could draw on for the conflict. Her old fogey strawman starting with kids these days and their "millennium items" gestures towards that. However, for a song which moves on to kidnapping as an alternative to marching, it's remarkably toothless, chiefly thanks to a cowardly lack of specificity. "We don't just protest for fun" -- so why do you then? The song offers no answer. The cover art with its rainbow flag and anti-gun symbol and even its vegan sign offers some possibilities which would have all seemed less cynically empty. As it is, the beat is toned down Billie Eilish and the message is toned down Billie Piper. [2]

Alfred Soto: The feyly articulated repetitions, theatrical harmonies, and finger snaps suggest a record company's attempt to repeat The Billie Eilish Experience. This Australian act projects adult fear of a generation it can't resist branding with a letter or a polite response by a member of this generation. Who can tell? Does it matter? [5]

Jacob Sujin Kuppermann: kidz bop black skinhead type beat [2]

Kayla Beardslee: Cool, sure, make young activists sound like cartoonish movie villains, that's great and not counterproductive at all. On a musical level, I have the exact same problems with this as I did "Dance Monkey": three minutes long, yet nothing important actually happens. There's the same blue-balling for a potential drop, the same hellishly affected indie-girl voice, the same sparse production that suggests a rush job more than any intentional playing with empty space -- the horns are nice, I guess, but the song as a whole is just so thin and unconvincing. At a bare minimum, "The Kids Are Coming" earns a couple points for good intent, but loses so many more for frustratingly uninspiring execution. [2]

Ian Mathers: I suspect the political (or quasi-political) content here is well meaning yet dumb as hell, but I can't be 100% sure because I still hate her goddamn voice so, so much and being subjected to it in an even more leaden, plodding environment than her last song isn't helping. [1]

Kylo Nocom: It was only a matter of time before the Build-a-Billie committee threw "Triumph of a Heart" and "Thumbs" into a blender to see what would be spit out. [6]

Katherine St Asaph: The kids have abdicated good taste, which in 2019 means abdicating chill and shiny for that one Gary Glitter song via "Personal Jesus" via "Black Skinhead" via "Thumbs." So obviously "The Kids are Coming" sounds great, and is if anything more relentless, more thwacking than it had to be. Of course, the thing has words. "We won't be bought" is predictably rich from the follow-up to a major-label breakout single. The spoken-word elder brought in for Tones to schaffel all over has an olde-radio affect that sounds more Silent Generation than the boomers this is OK-ing. And the outcome of all the running and gunning -- perhaps self-censoring, aware of where kids these days fall on the topic of gunning -- is the Olds meeting the terrifying end of being locked in the basement. When Billie Eilish buried a friend, she didn't mean in a box of old winter coats. Nevertheless, this makes a good three-quarters of the Hot 100 sound blase and sleep-deprived; I will seldom be upset with pop for going huge. [7]

Scott Mildenhall: Trusty genius.com relates that Tones and I has provided them with "verified commentary" for this song, but it's a shame that she couldn't do the same for its listeners. That her takes are glib isn't a crime, and nor is that they are presented with undue gravity -- bottomlessly depthless and emptily weighty are two of the paradoxes of perfect pop -- but what jars is that they don't sound like they come from someone with much of an affinity for their sentiment. It is very hard to believe that Tones and I genuinely feels that something as vague as "no-one seems to understand... why we live this way" gets to the heart of any particular truth, or is anything but a semantic mystery. Perhaps part of the problem is that she seems intent on making all of her songs so messy, forgoing tight lyricism for an over-reliance on surprising noises. Unfortunately, the loudest noise lands with a thud: a person falling off a bandwagon without ever making it on board. [3]

Jonathan Bradley: When I was fifteen, Silverchair released its inspiring and rebellious generational call-to-arms "Anthem for the Year 2000," and I really tried to get into the spirit. Like, yeah, us kids are gonna make it up to you in the year 2000 or something! Tones and I has drab dance beats instead of drab post-grunge riffing, but two decades have passed and Australia's kids are as corny as ever. There's also a bit about guns, which is weird, because Port Arthur and the ensuing gun control legislation took place in the decade before this singer was born. (It's not as if we don't still have too many guns in this country or there are not far-right forces aiming to weaken prohibitions on firearms, but youth here over the past couple decades has not been intertwined with random irruptions of gun violence the way it has in other parts of the world.) It's another way "The Kids are Coming" hopes to speak boldly without saying anything bold. [4]

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