#-> they can be thought of in both emotionally divorced and deeply compassionate ways both of which prove theyre eligible

[ghsolicitors]

Navigating Legal Waters: The Role of Local Solicitors in Your Community

In a world where legal complexities can often feel overwhelming, having a reliable and knowledgeable solicitor by your side can make all the difference. Local solicitors, in particular, play a vital role in serving their communities by providing accessible legal guidance and support. Whether you're dealing with a property transaction, drafting a will, or navigating a dispute, the expertise of a local solicitor can be invaluable.

Understanding the Importance of Local Solicitors

Local solicitors are deeply rooted in their communities, often serving generations of families and businesses. Their familiarity with the local landscape, including regulations, court systems, and community dynamics, gives them a unique advantage in addressing the specific needs of their clients.

One of the most significant advantages of working with a local solicitor is the personalized attention and tailored advice they offer. Unlike larger firms, where clients might feel like just another case number, local solicitors take the time to understand the individual circumstances of each client and provide solutions that are customized to their needs.

Areas of Expertise

Local solicitors typically offer a wide range of legal services, covering various aspects of both personal and business law. Some common areas of expertise include:

Property Law: Whether you're buying, selling, or leasing property, a local solicitor can guide you through the intricacies of property law, ensuring that your transactions are legally sound and protecting your interests every step of the way.

Family Law: From divorce and child custody disputes to adoption and prenuptial agreements, family law issues can be emotionally challenging. Local solicitors provide compassionate support and expert legal advice to help clients navigate these sensitive matters with care and confidence.

Estate Planning: Planning for the future is essential, and local solicitors can assist with drafting wills, setting up trusts, and establishing powers of attorney to ensure that your assets are protected and your wishes are honored.

Business Law: Whether you're starting a new business, negotiating contracts, or dealing with employment issues, local solicitors can provide valuable guidance to help your business thrive while staying compliant with relevant laws and regulations.

Building Trust and Relationships

Perhaps one of the most significant advantages of working with a local solicitor is the trust and relationships they build within the community. Clients often turn to local solicitors not only for their legal expertise but also for their reputation for integrity, reliability, and commitment to serving their clients' best interests.

Local solicitors understand the importance of building long-term relationships with their clients, earning their trust through open communication, transparency, and consistent results. Whether you're facing a legal challenge or planning for the future, having a trusted advisor who knows you and your community can provide peace of mind and confidence in your decisions.

Final Thoughts

In a world where legal matters can be complex and daunting, local solicitors serve as trusted guides, helping individuals and businesses navigate legal waters with confidence and peace of mind. Their expertise, personalized service, and commitment to their communities make them invaluable assets to those they serve.

[glorybcrn]

hihi everybody !! i’m kelly ( eighteen , she/her , mst ) and uh h ... i haven’t been in the roleplaying game for a hot minute but i’m really excited to be here n get back into it ! this is my garbage son gabriel who is technically an old muse ?? ngl i’ve dragged this poor binch to hell n back so if this intro kinda funky ... that why ....... also i may or may not be running on 3 hrs of sleep jfifjnck

◟ * ◊ ─ jason bateman + cismale + he/him » * believe it or not gabriel dombrova is working for the lothario family. they are forty seven years of age and are known to usually spend their time around city hall. the mayor, who has been a part of the alliance for sixteen years, has been living in victoria for forty seven years. the people closest to them describe the bisexual + capricorn to be driven and astute as well as reserved and unforgiving » 

background

— born and raised in victoria, despite not being a founding family, gabriel’s family still had relatively deep roots within the city; it was said that his great grandfather had moved here from massachusetts looking for the american dream. the patriarchal dombrova came from humble beginnings, building the family business ( a local inn ) from the ground up and over the decades it only got bigger and bigger until it had turned into the respectable hotel that it is known as today and now has multiple locations across the state of florida. naturally, his father inherited this business and his mother, on the other hand, is your typical southern belle, moved here from a small town in texas. she was a corporate lawyer ( it’s how she met gabriel’s father ) but since becoming a mother she really has had no interests in any other occupation other than trophy wife and socialite.

— to say that gabriel’s parents were old school would be putting it lightly. basically, both of his parents were deeply religious republicans and were very aware of their image as a family. they were harsh parents, extremely controlling when it came to their children’s lives but at the same time were also really emotionally absent. to this day they still believe that it was all in the name of tough love but obviously it was just emotional abuse. his father was especially hard on gabriel, he was a strong believer in physical discipline and thought gabriel to be too “soft”. he was always berating him, punishing him for petty offences, and pretty much just fostering your typical environment of toxic masculinity. though he never laid a hand on gabriel’s sister as she was what he called, “a lady” and his “pride and joy.”

— but gabriel was a good kid, he was obedient aside from stupid mistakes that kids are bound to make. he was your typical golden boy, a jack of all trades of sorts. not exceptionally good at one thing, but averagely good at a multitude of things. he was a quick learner and dedicated, anything he took a crack at, he eventually excelled in. throughout high school, he mostly kept to himself, choosing to focus on his education and after graduating valedictorian, he went to harvard where he earned his business degree. the plan was to come back to victoria, work for his father, and make his way up until he was ready to inherit the business himself.

— but while away at university, he met abigail. it was your typical whirlwind of a first love where it felt like it was just the two of you against the world. with her, gabriel experienced a sense of normalcy and sincere, unconditional love. for someone who severely lacked both up until then, maybe it wasn’t so crazy that the two decided to marry as soon as they graduated. together, they moved back to victoria to start their lives. to an outsider, gabriel’s life had seemingly always been perfect, envy-worthy. with a renowned and respected family, a successful business, the perfect wife, and now, a baby on the way too, it’s no wonder he’d been chosen by the lothario’s to be their candidate as mayor.

— his connection with the alliance started out small; the hotel business had been in a rough spot for a couple of years and out of nowhere, they seemed to have just come in at the right time, saving the day. he could be on their payroll all for the price of a few, teensy favours. favours such as his hotel being used as refuge for some of their men, a place of business when needed, and gabriel refusing to be a failure, especially in his father’s eyes, easily succumbed to their offer. 

— of course, gabriel’s family has no idea about the real root of his sudden interest in politics, much less how the family business has managed to be so successful still despite his now even busier schedule. and as a result, his relationship with his wife and children have deteriorated over the years. it began as a defense mechanism, intentionally distancing himself from his loved ones as a way to protect them. and while his children maybe the one last soft spot gabriel has left, his sudden absence as a father has definitely put a strain on his relationship with them. however his relationship with his wife seemed to suffer even more, things between the two of them are definitely not how they once used to be. they’re cold to one another and see each other more so as strangers rather than husband and wife. unfortunately, a divorce doesn’t exactly fit into the white picket-fence image gabriel had so carefully curated over the years. 

personality

— after decades of playing different facades, gabriel’s definitely lost a sense of his true self, or maybe it’s just fully gone. he used to be this really compassionate and benevolent person who always prioritized family over anything. it’s why ( at least this is what he tells himself ) he initially risked getting into business with the alliance in the first place, but now, he really only pretends to be those things to get the people to like him. he can be incredibly charming when he wants to be but it’s all just so .. hollow ? if that makes sense. like, nowadays there’s rarely an ounce of honesty or sincerity in him. he’s just so consumed with being a part of the alliance, it’s all he really knows at this point.

— extremely driven and cunning, if there’s something gabriel wants, he’ll get it. even as a child, he was an over achiever and so he’s known to always come through when it’s requested of him. he’s not exactly evil .. ? but he is loyal to the lotharios. i think there’s a small part of him that hates them, hates himself, and hates what he’s doing but idk he kinda just tells that it to shut up lmao. having had to learn it as a child, he’s very good at compartmentalizing which is probably why he can play all these different roles so well without going insane dnkjds

— really reserved, tries ( and succeeds ) to put out this strait-laced and conservative image. has the ability to remain calm in any sort of situation and twist things to his advantage. like honestly ?? gabriel is probably a pr manager’s wet dream .. he just comes across as this very charming and kind man, he’s the type of politician that’ll say hi to your baby and sign its head idk

but ugh idk it’s hard to explain gabriel’s personality since he’s such an emotional mess, i would just end up rambling about the same thing over and over again if i tried to keep going so i’m gonna .. stop right now.

connections

— personal assistant ?? someone incredibly organized and competent. this plot can range from really basic like .. yeah book my doctor’s appointment thnx to someone he’s actually pretty close to ? maybe he doesn’t even realize it, idk. like we can literally do wtvr w this, so !

— other members of the alliance, could be just someone he’s acquainted with or knows well and works pretty close with.

— if you have any muses involved with politics or managing ? his campaign manager or just anyone who worked on his campaign. like w the personal assistant we can .. go basic or brazy w this.

— love interests ? doesn’t have to be ~romantic~ per se .. but idk like affairs ig ?? cause .. gabe’s not perfect, rip. but he is careful so it wldn’t be like .. smth messy or if it was he’d prob make certain measurements after. idk what that means exactly dnjsnsdjk just tryna not get caught uk … or even something as small as flirtationships !

ok these all suck bc gabe is….. emotionally dead inside cnjdsnksnjd but ! obv tht can change per circumstance n whatever so pls .. feel free to mssg me whenever if u have any ideas !!

[uhh-the-green-thing]

“You just make things so hard sometimes.” | Becca x MC (Jey)

Hey, guys. This is the first fic I have ever written. Ever. In my entire life. It’s a bit lengthy too, so I’m sorry if it bores you or if it’s not up to your guys’ standards. Hope you guys like it though. AND PLEASE GIVE ME FEEDBACK :( I wanna know how I can improve my writing. Thanks guys.

It had been so boring today. Classes were bleak, the professors just droning on and on about whatever uninteresting topic they were talking about. Having no one to rant to about this also wasn’t helping, and Becca somewhat found herself missing Madison’s company.

“I don’t need her,” she thought, furrowing her eyebrows.

She still felt bitter about everything that’s happened–the divorce and the outvoting–and thinking about those soured her mood even more.

She started walking down the quad with a huff, the light spring breeze blowing her hair gently across her face. She needed a distraction from all of this; she needed Jey.

Becca reached down and opened her bag, grabbing her phone to send a text to Jey. Busy? Where are you?

Her reply was quick. Just working on an article. I’m by my tree. Something wrong?

She found it cliche that Jey’s ideal working place in Hartfeld was under a tree in the more secluded area near the quad. The silence makes sense, but where would she charge her laptop?

I’m coming. She replied, disregarding the latter question.

As Becca made her way to the tree, she took out her compact and fixed herself a little. Gotta look good at least.

From a short distance, she could make out Jey’s relaxed frame, typing away on her laptop. A notepad and some sheets of paper lie by her side. She looked about, checking if there wasn’t anyone nearby that she knew. There wasn’t a lot of people around, but it wouldn’t hurt to be sure.

“Hey,” Becca greeted as she walked over to her.

Jey looked up from her laptop and smiled as she saw Becca. “Oh, hey.”

Oh, dear god that smile. Becca would never admit how she loved seeing it. She was slightly flustered by Jey’s subtle scrutiny, loving the way how her brown gaze felt just as kind as normal but held a degree of intensity to it–a look mostly reserved for people Jey deeply cared about–and she almost forgot how her throat worked. Yep, she felt better already. “Classes done?”

“Y-yeah,” Becca stuttered. She sighed, sitting down next to her.

“I’m guessing they went well?” Jey teased, seeing the woman’s lack of enthusiasm. She put her laptop aside and turned to Becca, tucking a few strands of hair behind her ear and kissed her cheek softly. Becca rolled her eyes.

“Ugh, hardly,” she grumbled as she laid her head on the brunette’s shoulder, Jey wrapping an arm around her waist. She closed her eyes and took a deep breath.

“So what happened?” Jey asked.

“Nothing.”

“Nothing, huh? You wouldn’t be acting like this if ‘nothing’ happened.” She cast a side-eye.

“No, that’s just it. My classes bored me to death and there’s literally nothing to do.”

“Well, you could always do me…” Jey trails off. Becca raised her head from Jey’s shoulder and gave her an unamused look, chuckling slightly when Jey gave her a sly wink.

“Shut up,” Becca said, looking down as her smile faded. “And all this divorce and sorority crap isn’t doing me any good either.”

“Oh…” Jey frowned. “Have you talked to Madison yet?”

“Of course not, why would I?” She scoffed, shaking her head. Jey moved her other arm and took Becca’s hand in hers, running her thumbs in slow, comforting strokes. She felt Becca relax a little against her.

“Becca, she really wants to patch things up with you. Just hear her out, I’m sure that she’s having a hard time with this too. She is your best friend, right?”

“Oh please. She stole my position. She’s probably having a grand time now that she’s queen bee,” she said, rolling her eyes.

Jey sighed and looked at Becca, thoughtful. “I highly doubt that, Becca. She’s a really sweet girl, and it’s not like she asked for the girls to vote for her. That’s just very un-Madison.” Jey reasons. “And remember how you told me that you only got one vote? Did–”

“Wow,” Becca interrupted, her face forming her trademark scowl. “Thanks for reminding me.”

“I’m just saying,” Jey said emphatically, “Did you ever stop to think that that vote could come from Madison?”

Becca’s scowl softened. Huh. Madison would do that. She knew the endearing dummy too well, but was far too proud and stubborn to admit that maybe Madison did vote for her. The thought did little to quell her annoyance though.

“I don’t wanna talk about it anymore.” Becca finally said, suddenly cold and withdrawn. She looked down and started plucking at a patch of grass by her side. Jey breathed a sigh resignation, clearly disappointed, but knew better than to push. “Okay.”

They stayed like that for a few minutes, Jey holding Becca in her arms, hoping the silence and her touch may calm Becca. Jey held her closer and nuzzled against her neck, relieved when there weren’t any signs of protest from her.

Birds’ chirping could be heard in the distance along with the low murmur from a few people occasionally passing by. Leaves rustled as the wind blew, and Jey closed her eyes, reveling in the quiet and Becca’s warmth. Maybe I should bring Becca here with me more oft–

“I’m sorry I’m like this.” Becca spoke, her voice interrupting Jey’s thoughts. “I don’t get how you put up with me, why you put up with me” she continued, her somber tone worrying Jey. She removed her hand from Jey’s grasp and looked down, staring at that same patch of grass she was plucking earlier.

“Becca…” Jey turned her body towards Becca, her heart breaking as she assessed the woman beside her, studying the woeful expression on her face.

“Every time you see me, I’m either mad or sad. I’ve been so horrible to you, Jey,” Becca looks at her. “Since day one. I spilled coffee on you, I humiliated you in front of the whole sorority, I fucking pushed you into a pool, I’ve been a bitch to you everytime we saw each other, I–”

Becca broke. The shame of her actions overwhelmed her; the force of it almost physical, so much that she glanced away from Jey and stared at the ground. One day, Jey would forgive her, because it was in her nature to forgive. And maybe she already has. She was a compassionate woman, who for whatever reason, cared about Becca and was willing to give her a second chance. But could Becca ever forgive herself?

She doubted it.

Hot pinpricks lit behind her eyes. Becca closed them and tried hard to blink back the threat of tears. She hated showing any kind of vulnerability to anyone, but her strength was wavering.

“Hey, look at me.” Jey said softly, grasping Becca’s chin and gently raised it. Becca lifted her eyes, reluctantly meeting Jey’s gaze.

But then Jey kept staring at her, kind brown eyes searching and forgiving, so lovely and soft and full of caring, and that traitorous warmth in her chest started to seep through the cracks, and it was all so unfair.

“I care about you, Becca. I care about you a lot more than I let you on to know,” Jey said, wondering if her admission gave too much away. She raised her hand and cupped Becca’s cheek, running her thumb across her skin lightly. “I didn’t know those things still bothered you until now. I thought we’ve gone through this before…” Sure, they’ve mentioned it briefly before, but Jey never knew that Becca was still holding this close to her chest.

“I’m sorry, Jey. I’m so, so sorry.” Becca wasn’t the type of person to say those words so easily. You usually have to fight with her just to get her to apologize, and even if she knows she’s clearly in the wrong, she’d still be unwilling to say those damned words, stubborn and unrelenting. But dear god, why was she so willing to let her walls down when it comes to Jey? Why did she keep on showing vulnerability around her? Becca couldn’t understand. “I… I don’t deserve you,” she weakly whispered, knowing well that Jey had already put this issue past them.

Jey watched Becca struggle with her feelings, her heart aching at the sight before her. She’d never imagined Becca, the mean, abrasive Becca, to show this magnitude of emotions to her.

“Maybe you don’t…” Jey replied slowly, making Becca look up at her. “But even so, do you think that would change the way I treat you or how I feel about you?” She paused. “Even if you don’t believe it, you deserve to be happy, Becca. And I’ll do anything to make that happen.” Her eyes were full of sincerity and something more, Becca couldn’t put her finger on it. It was too soon to tell but, was it… love?

“Come here.” Jey cupped Becca’s face with her hands and leaned forward to kiss her. The sudden pressure of Jey’s lips on Becca’s was dizzying, and it was only because Jey’s hands held her steady that she didn’t break contact. Her lips were warm, placing soft and gentle kisses that seemed to devour every scrap intelligence from Becca’s mind, constant and reassuring.

Jey pulled back after a long moment, breathless. She tangled her fingers in Becca’s blonde tresses, leaning forward to rest their heads together. Becca’s eyes were still closed, and a great deal of color returned to her cheeks.

“Jey…” Becca started, opening her eyes. “You… Christ, you. I…” she pulled back a little and swallowed a lump in her throat, looking straight into Jey’s eyes, unbelieving yet grateful. She didn’t see the point in arguing with Jey anymore. She was so emotionally drained.

“I meant what I said before, Becca,” Jey said, her voice slightly hoarse with emotion. “That I cared about you… You’re just. Ugh. You just make things so hard sometimes.” Jey laughed lightly, stroking Becca’s cheek affectionately.

Becca snorted softly, pressing an exhausted kiss against Jey’s cheeks as her fingers combed through Jey’s hair. She couldn’t believe how this girl could stand her, she’d just taken them both on a roller coaster of emotions after all.

There was a long silence, both giving each other meaningful looks full of raw emotion. Becca buried her face against Jey’s neck, loving the way Jey’s arms wrapped around her in a sweet, comforting embrace.  

 A sudden beep cut through the silence.

“Crap,” Jey said quietly, looking over towards the source of the sound. She frowned.

“What?”

“My laptop died.”

Forgive me if you guys found this piece unamusing, too lengthy, or whatever. Like I said, I’ve never written ANYTHING of this kind in my entire life, so please bear with me if you found a lot of errors and flaws. I tried my best though.

[whitewolfofwinterfell]

I LOVE Stelena as well and don't have enough room here to explain why, but you covered it so beautifully in your post! I also loved the Juliet Burke gifset you just reblogged and would love to hear your brilliant analysis of her as well. She's a tough character for me to completely grasp! Also, do you ship her with Sawyer? Jack? Neither?!

Yay, you love Stelena too. They’re just amazing, aren’t they? I’m exactly the same as you and could speak forever about why I love them. It was so hard to keep my response in the previous ask so short, but I did my best haha. 

Ah, Juliet! I absolutely love Juliet and I ship her with Sawyer. Absolutely no hesitancy there. 

Honestly, I can see why some people might’ve found Juliet hard to grasp. I put it down to the fact that she’s introduced to us as an Other and therefore is essentially an antagonist. I also think that Elizabeth Mitchell was incredibly good at making Juliet appear mysterious and dark. I remember thinking in the beginning that she was nothing but a manipulator whose aim and job was to break Jack. I mean, that was true to an extent, but obviously as the episodes progess and we learn more about her back-story we discover there’s a lot more to it than that. 

How I’d describe Juliet is an incredibly compassionate, nurturing and loving person that was actually good right down to her core, but I feel like sometimes this gets lost on people. She struggled with intimacy and letting people get close to her as a result of her parents divorce (and the way her scumbag ex-husband treated her probably only added to that), but we saw how deeply and truly she loved with the select few that she did let into her heart. Her relationship with her sister was particularly touching. She was the one person she loved more than anything else in the world and everything she did on the island was because she so desperately wanted to get home to her. 

What I think is so often overlooked when it comes to Juliet is that she was a victim. She was cornered by Richard and essentially coerced into accepting a job they claimed would transform her life and her career, she was then drugged, transported to a mysterious island and once she was there held against her will. She was told she would only be there for 6 months and she expressed on numerous occasions that she wanted to leave (particularly when she found out her sister’s cancer had returned) but Ben wouldn’t let her leave. Because of his infatuation with her, which was completely one sided and unwanted by Juliet, he held her prisoner and kept her from getting the her sick sister. Ben emotionally blackmailed her, telling her if she stayed he would cure her sister’s cancer and let her go home, which meant she was essentially answerable to Ben at all times and forced to follow his orders, because she wanted to please him in the hopes that he would keep his promises.

That one line always sticks in my head where Jack says something like, “I saw it in your eyes. When that submarine blew up you were devastated. You want to get off this island as much as I do and that makes you one of us.” Juliet was never truly an Other, she was a prisoner of the island (and more specifically Ben) as much as Jack, Sawyer, Sayid, Kate, Jin, Sun and all of the others. 

Juliet at all times was driven by love and compassion. When she took the job on the island it was because she wanted to help people and save lives. She was told that women on the island were dying and she wanted to stop that from happening. She literally impregnated her sister whose reproductive system had been destroyed by chemotherapy, because what her sister wanted more than anything else in the world was a baby. She helped Sun when she was pregnant, saved Claire when she got sick, saved Jack’s life when he needed his appendix removed, she even helped try to save little Ben’s life, despite everything he’d done (or was going to do) to her. Likewise, when she manipulated Jack in the beginning it was because Ben told her if she did what he asked he’d let her go home to her sister and later when she went behind Ben’s back and asked Jack to let Ben die during the operation it was because she realised she couldn’t trust a word he said. The only way she could ensure she could return home to her sister was if Ben died. When Jack outed her plan to Ben and the others, she denied it because that was what anyone else in that situation would do. Ben was essentially a dictator and her captor who the hell would hold their hands up and admit they attempted treason against a dictator? She did what she had to survive. When she was branded a traitor for killing an Other, it was under Ben’s orders. Later, Ben ordered her to go undercover and mark the tents of the pregnant women and report back to him about issues regarding fertility, but she told Jack the truth about what Ben had planned and helped stop it. 

Now my reason for bringing up all of these instances is because her actions were all over the place in the beginning, which is probably why you struggled to grasp her character. One minute she wanted Ben dead, then she was helping him to survive, then she agreed to help Ben and go undercover, but she told Jack about Ben’s plans and it was hard to gage where her loyalties lay and what her motivations were. But actually, if you put yourself in her position, it’s very easy to understand. She knew Ben was a liar and manipulator and that she couldn’t trust his word. So when Jack came along she began to wonder if there was a different way and if by joining Jack and the islanders, she would actually finally be able to go back home. But she never quite knew what to do for the best. On the one hand, Jack blatantly seemed the better option, but on the other Juliet knew that Ben had the power to send her back home if he chose to (he had a submarine and boat at his beckon call) and she also knew that despite the fact he asserted his control over her, to an extent she also had control over him because of how he felt about her. Therefore, it was a risk to jump ship and betray and leave Ben and the Others to join Jack and the islanders, because it wasn’t a guarantee they could help her return home. She was torn and I think anyone in that position would be. Let’s also not forget that she did spend three years of her life with the Others and so to an extent she must’ve come to see them as her family and just walking away from them wasn’t going to be an easy decision. And honestly, I don’t think Juliet ever was one or the other - an islander or an Other. I think she understood both sides and although she disagreed with Ben and resented him for how he’d treated her, she knew that there were instances where he did things to protect the island and his people. 

But returning back to what I said about Juliet always being driven by love and compassion, she waited on the island when everyone was getting rescued because she wanted to make sure everyone else got to the boat first and she quite literally used the last bit of life she had in her to detonate the hydrogen bomb because she wanted to save everyone from the terrible fate they’d suffered and undo it all. She was all about saving, protecting and helping people regardless of who they were or what the circumstance. And obviously, that’s why she chose to work in medicine, because it’s where her passions lay and what she wanted to devote her life to. 

I think when she fell in love with Sawyer and joined the Dharma Initiative, things changed for her a lot. For one thing, her main concern was no longer to return home, because they were in the past and therefore there wasn’t really a life for her to return to and her sister either wouldn’t have been born yet or a very young child. And really that was the first time since being on the island where she was actually free and able to do what she wanted, which I think allowed her to blossom and devote more time to her work again and just live. Juliet and Sawyer mentioned so many times how resentful they were of the islanders returning, because up until that point they were happy. They built a life for themselves and despite the fact that to an extent they had to lie because of the circumstances, I think they really found a place they belonged and a home. When it comes to the final season, I think it really showed just how selfless and amazing Juliet was. Not only did she welcome the islanders back (despite deep down wishing they’d never returned), but she risked her safety and everything she and Sawyer had built over the three years to keep them safe. She was lovely to Kate, which let’s be honest, was a very strained relationship given the circumstances. So many people in that situation would’ve been resentful and bitter since Kate was the woman Sawyer had been in love with, but she never took that out on Kate. In fact, she never took it out on Sawyer either. When she thought Sawyer still loved Kate, she simply told Sawyer that she knew he loved her and she was willing to let him go. She loved him so much but she immediately was willing to walk away and let him go if it meant he was going to be happy. She detonated the bomb all because she wanted Sawyer to find his happiness and she didn’t care if that meant she may never see him again or even meet him. I mean, that really is the ultimate selfless sacrifice of love. 

Since I’m on the subject of Sawyer and Juliet, I might as well briefly talk about why I ship them. I think that Sawyer and Juliet as a pairing aren’t necessarily that popular amongst LOST fans, mostly because people claim it was too rushed due to the time jump. I do understand why some feel this way, because I’ve gotta admit that it’s not ideal when as a viewer we don’t get to see the full development of two characters falling in love and the process of them getting together. But with Sawyer and Juliet, I never felt like that was necessary. No, they weren’t together before season 5, but the signs were there and it was an inevitability. Juliet always seemed to be able to reach Sawyer and to pull him back, which was a very big deal when it came to Sawyer since there was very little that could restrain him and usually no one that could make him see reason. They watched everyone they knew and care about disappear before their eyes and they started to rely on each other as the time jumps were happening because they were all they had left. When Sawyer asked her to stay with him, it was so clear that they were going to fall in love. Why do we need to see it to believe it? I already saw it. 

The thing I love about Sawyer and Juliet is they were themselves with each other. Who Sawyer was in the early seasons wasn’t really him, it was who he’d become through the trauma of his parents death, need for vengeance that consumed him and selfish and cruel lifestyle he led. Sawyer isn’t even his name. It’s the name the man assumed that caused his parents deaths. And that’s one of my favourite things about Juliet and Sawyer - she never called him Sawyer. To Juliet he was always James (or Jim) and I think that’s such a beautiful thing. He wasn’t Sawyer the con man to her, he was just James. Sawyer became a real person when he was with Juliet. He was able to shed that cold, hard exterior and stop hiding behind a name that wasn’t even his that represented nothing but misery and everything he hated about himself and his life. That barrier when it came to love is something they both had and it all can be traced back to their childhood and parents, but they broke through it together. With Kate, Sawyer could never be himself and he could never truly let his walls down because she never fully committed to him and she was always torn between him and Jack. Where as with Juliet he felt safe and assured because she loved him and only him. It was a relationship between two people, not three and that’s what he needed and what a relationship should be. As for Juliet, her experiences with men up until that point had hardly been positive and I’m sure she was terrified of opening herself up to someone again but because she knew Sawyer was just as scared as she was it made it easier. And as she got to know James she saw that he was a loyal, honest and good man that would devote himself to her and he did. 

Much like Stelena were built upon the idea of two broken people healing each other, so were Sawyer and Juliet. Up until the point where they were together they were both up and down. Sawyer was always torn between being the bad guy and the good guy and Sawyer or James and Juliet was always torn between being an Other or an islander, between doing terrible things and whatever it took to leave the island or doing the right thing even if it may prevent her leaving the island. It’s only once they were together that both of them seemed to really settle down and feel comfortable in who they were. And again, just like Stefan and Elena, they were so much better people together. It was amazing to see how they navigated themselves within the Dharma Initiative and how moral and good they were. When they were having to lie to their friends and people about the islanders, they hated it, but knew it had to be done. They both worked to save Ben’s life and agreed on that without hesitation. Up until the issues arose in regards to Juliet thinking he still had feelings for Kate, they were very much in sync. They had the same opinions on things and believed in the same thing and I noticed a pattern of them always being concerned with doing what was right. And they inspired each other to do what was right. There were so many times where one of them was afraid or doubting themselves and the other would step in and remind them who they were and that they were capable. I’m not a fan of belittling another ship in favour of another ship, but I feel like in this instance a comparison is the most effective way of capturing my point, so I’m going to talk about Sawyer and Kate for a second. Kate could’ve never done for Sawyer what Juliet did for him. Juliet was Sawyer’s conscience, his voice of reason, she was the good in his life, she saw who he was down to his core and allowed him to be vulnerable, kind and soft in a safe, understanding and encouraging environment. Kate was always so unstable, never able to soothe Sawyer or console him, she was always distressing him, she was selfish with him and unable to listen to him or encourage him or have any sort of positive impact in his life and despite the fact that she was considered one of the only people to see the good in him, I actually always felt like she saw the bad in him. There were times when things happened and she immediately assumed Sawyer had done them when he was innocent and I think unlike Juliet who saw James the person, Kate saw Sawyer the conman. I said I would only briefly talk about why I like Sawyer and Juliet and as always this has turned into an essay lmao. So I’ll end it by saying, in season 6 when Sawyer and Juliet reunited in “purgatory” that just cemented for me that they were absolutely soul mates. It was by far one of the most beautiful and romantic scenes across the 6 seasons and there was something about James’ and Juliet’s souls that just got each other. I also love that theirs is that kind of love where you go, “Oh, that’s unexpected, I never would’ve put those two together”, but it just works so damn perfectly and you realise that actually these two people were exactly everything they’ve needed and wanted their entire lives. For me, Sawyer and Juliet are that couple. 

But back to Juliet as an individual character, I’d summarise her as a character that was so completely benevolent that she dedicated her life to saving others, helping bring life into the world and giving people the joy of having a child where it was supposed to be impossible; who loved with every ounce of her being and was fiercely loyal and devoted to those she loved to the point whereby she’d do anything for them, despite having instilled in her skepticism and fear of love because of her parents divorce; that was understanding, open, forgiving and kind to everyone, even those that didn’t deserve it; that was manipulated, blackmailed, controlled, held prisoner and put into a horrendous situation whereby her life was stolen from her; that sometimes made bad judgement calls or wrong decisions in an impossible situation where all she desired was to return home to her sick sister; that through everything always did what she felt was best and right. 

I hope that seeing Juliet through my POV helps you to get a better understanding of her character, because honestly she’s a gem of a character and I want anyone and everyone that has watched LOST to be able to fully appreciate her for that. 

And thank you so much for asking this. I love love love giving analysis’ like this on characters/ships I love. 

[beyondthetemples-ooc]

....Gods... I forgot how intense that book is.

(tl;dr Bruiser, by Neal Shusterman, is one of my favorite books in existence, for many of the same reasons that Raven is my favorite character, and it’s an incredible rarity, and a treasure, and all too emotionally real.)

(( also, NTS: I really, REALLY need to write Neal a letter about this book, and how important and powerful it really is.))

Last week, I’d ran out of new books to read-- books that weren’t related to linguistics anyways, which I don’t currently have the emotional or physical capacity to focus on, so the Finnish and Italian grammar would have to wait.

So sometime last week I decided: I couldn’t spend money on new books, and I didn’t feel like reading comic books. But on breaks, at bus stops, and when bored of socializing: I need something to read...

...so I decided, re-reading. I’d re-read a favorite. And Bruiser was my best option.

I’ve always loved it-- to be honest, I loved it simply for the fact that it’s about an empathic healer. An EMPATH character! In a NOVEL! How often does that happen?! Nearly NEVER!

And put to Neal Shusterman’s questions about morality, emotions, humanity, and a storyline that digs its hooks in your heart and just refuses to let you go... It’s beautiful.

It’s not often a book can nearly bring me to tears. It’s not often I feel too deeply for the characters to stop caring the moment it’s closed. Very few authors are capable of putting me in touch with my own emotions to the point where my mind spins and those long-closed-off depths, re-open for me.

And it is a very, VERY rare scenario that, upon a RE-read, my fingertips tingle and that static builds in me to the point where, when a cat clambered up to my side to be pet, I shocked her with static. Repeatedly.

( ^ That’s not unusual when emotions happen, by the way. Belle seemed very determined to press against me and make me pet her until I lifted from that deep, dark fog of sympathetic, empathetic pain and plotpoints and personal rapport... but her poor ears, nose, and tail were zapped a few times in the process.)

...It’s emotion that’s WORTH exploring though, I think.

Especially since... You know how, every time you revisit something you’ve experienced before, you notice more, and more, and more of it? For books this is very true. And I think this is only my third, or fourth time re-reading it; at least in its entirety, I honestly forgot how many times I’d read it when i had it from the library, I’m pretty sure I reread it sections at a time... so I’m sure there are sequences I’ve read ten, twenty times by now. 

(I’ve long lost the paper I wrote on to record the page numbers and passages that meant the most to me... and maybe by now, it has even CHANGED.)

See, the thing about this book is that, for me: it’s PERSONAL. It’s RELATABLE. There are so many things-- so many finely-tuned, situationally-specific, unique and individual THINGS that made this book so well worth reading over, and over, and OVER again. Messages that needed to be spoken into my life. People I needed to consider. Concepts I needed to wonder about.

And all of its woven with such beautiful intricacy and layered HUMANITY, that I just...

....I appreciate this book so much, because everything, and I do mean EVERYTHING in it, is important to me.

~ I had a feeling from the very beginning of the book that he was an empath. ~ And a healer? A healer! ~ LOOK, AN EMPATH WHOSE “ABILITIES” AREN’T CONFUSED FOR TELEPATHY! OR PORTRAYED AS BEING CONVENIENT. ~ the intricacy of both the injured and the healers’ mindsets being involved in his healing capacity??? ~ seriously the way he writes Brewster’s empathy is scarily similar to mine. ~ the whole Familial Divorce thing. ~ Emotional escapism. ~ having to turn off his own ability to Feel and Care to SURVIVE with it. ~ “What would they do if they found out” ~ “i HAVE to keep my distance from them” ~ “it’s not just physical. it’s EMOTIONAL TOO” ~ That isn’t fair to him. ~ It isn’t fair to make him deal with all our problems FOR us. ~ So what if he seems to like it and is determined to save us from it? ~ We have to own and handle our own problems, too!

Just...

.......i have a weakness. (...many. But...) Compassionate to a fault. Humans, animals... sometimes plants. I’ll take what I can; endure their pains for them; heal them because I can, and on some level I NEED to, not because I want to. And I do want to, too, but, I can’t always; my own stability is at stake, and I just.... have so many limits.

I’ve genuinely begun wondering if the reason my health has failed so badly in the past couple years is because I’ve been living with people with very severe physical ailments, or emotional mental illnesses, and my existence is nothing but a sponge absorbing these things. The doctors couldn’t find what was wrong. $2500 and an emergency hospital visit later, and they claimed that nothing was wrong. I don’t think what’s wrong is able to be measured by instruments.

But I digress.

Still, I bear their scars. Physical. Psychological. The draining; the physical overwhelming... not as badly as it used to be, when the crowded high school halls surrounded me with 8,000 people, a hundred too close to me, eight thousand too many in range.

I fell terribly ill from that, too. Multiple times.

This time around? Reading the book, I mean? There were two things that really, really STRUCK me, as important and layered conflicts, and details...

~ The whole situation with the abuse. It felt too real to me the first time, reading it. Because sans the physical violence, the uncle’s abuse exactly, perfectly, eerily echoed my stepmother’s abuse to me all my life. Guilting. Venting. Yelling at me until she felt better. Even to the point where, like Brew, I had to stop caring about her to save myself. But the HUGE internal conflict, where, once they’re done abusing you: They love you, and you love them. And you don’t know why. But you do. And they say they’re sorry; they love you; they want what’s best for you, to protect you, and you have to listen to them, because they’re keeping you safe.

~ The whole, “We have to OWN our own pains!” I appreciated that; I always have, from the very first read. But this time, what struck me... They realized this, on their own. They CHOSE to take back their pains... FOR him.

And I thought about my family. The people I live with.

Would they do that?

Could they EVER?

And I was brought to tears, realizing... I don’t think anyone in my life even understands how much I bear for them, how hard I have to block myself to keep from passing out just to keep form blacking out when I stand the moment my body’s health falters. Recovery is hell.

If I went comatose, because I had chosen to save someone’s life...

....I couldn’t say with certainty that anyone would really, truly, ever be able to take that stand, and DECIDE they they wanted all of their hurts back.

...for context? My family has issues with such simple accommodations as “don’t talk about v*mit around me”. The claim, “I would do anything for you” - but when I tell someone “It hurts me when you say I have no common sense, because of course I don’t; my sense isn’t common, and I can’t help that I think differently”... they tell me I must learn how, and imply that if I can’t, I’m an idiot.

...like I said... Abusive. Most well-intentioned.. but abusive nonetheless.

...anyways...

......This book is heavy. It’s so, so heavy... But, tonight, I just keep tHINKING. It wasn’t until I’d endured 13 years of being hurt (and being told it was all my fault), and read certain posts that induced doubt, and then lived with my mother, how much I realized: I was living in an extremely volatile situation of emotional abuse and constant stress.

(...it’s a long and complicated story, but I’m back to living with them now.)

I knew I was being abused, and yet... I healed when I could, what I could. I soak in exhaustion and frustration and depression and anxiety every day.

I’m just... wondering, now...

...How am I supposed to keep myself HEALTHY, living this way?

...I do think it’s safest for me, to live alone. Most peaceful... (I need peace in my life, so desperately. I’m “not wired” for conflict. Another thing I share with Brewster...)

........it’sj ust...

...i don’t know, I’m far too tired and physically exhausted to put words to these darker thoughts just now.

But tl;dr, this book is really, really important. And I truly, deeply, sincerely respect Neal Shusterman for going to the depths he reaches regarding empathy, abuse, healing, and love.

It’s scarily real.

But there’s something so extremely and deeply HEALING about reading a situation too scarily close to your own... and finding truth and new thoughts and revelation in it.

Something healing.........

[empaths-hsp]

How Spiritual Direction Can Help HSPs in Troubled Times

We HSPs are arguably more at home in the enigmatic terrain of intuition than we are in diagnosis and treatment.

Ask most people what spiritual direction is, and you’ll get a host of blank stares. Eight years ago that would’ve been me — until I found myself in a rocking chair sitting across from my own spiritual director.

I’d been seeing a therapist I loved. He was an ordained minister, but had left the church to practice Buddhism and become a psychotherapist. We spent more time discussing meditation techniques than we did the typical modalities, and it was a focus I found more helpful at that time of life. Visualizations came that took me into new currents of emotional insight. A year-and-a-half in, however, he left his private practice to return to the hospital setting. I’d given up looking for a replacement when a friend suggested a spiritual director. 

Spiritual direction (also known as spiritual companionship) is a means of spiritual support offered most often in a one-on-one relationship; in some ways it’s similar to therapy. For example, it’s non-judgmental and conversational — like talk therapy — and helps a person come to insights on their own rather than giving direct advice. Unlike conventional therapy, however, it is structured around the idea that there’s a larger presence and purpose moving within your life. 

Today, spiritual direction is practiced across the globe in many world religions, as well as by those outside of any formal faith tradition (that is, spiritual but not religious). 

Why I Sought Spiritual Direction as a Highly Sensitive Person (HSP)

I figured seeing a spiritual director was worth a try — but the stakes were high. I’d just separated from my partner, and I was trying to build a new life with my two young children. Divorce proceedings were imminent. In the midst of the most emotionally charged time of my life, however, spiritual direction opened a door of deep support I never knew was possible one that spoke to my emotionally sensitive, introspective temperament.

You see, as a highly sensitive person (HSP), I’m operating with the volume and brightness turned up on the world. I’m more sensitive emotionally as well, often processing information more deeply than non-HSPs and within a greater field of emotional “vision.” I feel an energy in my surroundings and in my exchanges with others. I’m also highly attuned to subtle connections and symbolic inferences. These HSP traits are what drew me toward spiritual direction — and why I continue to be drawn to it today.

How Spiritual Direction Can Help Highly Sensitive People  

1. You start from a place of inner revelation, not diagnosis.

Therapy can be an illuminating and critical means for healing. For many of us, it’s an essential support in working through trauma or sustaining mental well-being. It can restore the functionality that allows us to live a full life. And, as an inherently medical model, therapy offered me ideal guidance for particular situations — but it wasn’t an effective ongoing support. The fact was, while certain struggles in my life benefited from the process of a diagnosis and treatment, my life as a whole did not.

While both talk therapy and spiritual direction may offer a compassionate approach to particular struggles, spiritual direction centers itself within the sacred journey of each person — the mystery we live into and the presence that accompanies us. This change in perspective opened a path for me into self-affirmation, empowerment, and peace. HSPs often notice subtle things that others do not, and by acknowledging the bigger forces moving through our lives, spiritual direction teaches us to embrace that.

2. Spiritual direction offers an expansive view of being human.

As HSPs, many of us feel we don’t always fit in well with the prevailing outer culture. While much of our conversation inevitably focuses on identifying our traits, needs, and strengths as highly sensitive people, we can also recognize that the dominant culture represents a mere blip in human history — and only a fragment of the larger picture of being human. 

Spiritual direction, by its embrace of the mythic imagination, cultivates other ways of knowing — means that are innate but largely neglected, imprinted in the human psyche and spirit. The soul is always larger than any structure it finds itself in.

As HSPs, we’re arguably more at home in the enigmatic terrain of intuition. Many of us are well-versed in the acuity of the senses and the resonance of silence. Ancestral memory, the soul’s timetable, sensory rituals, spiritual ceremony, heart-centered insight… these might be more accessible, and perhaps more welcome and intelligible concepts, to those already steeped in sensitized waters.

3. Spiritual direction offers us a bigger container for questions and struggles.

Adapting the lesson of an early Buddhist teaching, author Jack Kornfield wrote, “If you put a spoonful of salt in a cup of water it tastes very salty. If you put a spoonful of salt in a lake of fresh water, the taste is still pure and clear.” In other words, while our rational minds are easily overwhelmed, intuition tells us when we need a larger container for the challenges we experience. 

That’s more than a mere coping mechanism. As an HSP, I need a different way to relate to life. That “bigger container” frees me from overwhelm and allows me to move with more ease and clarity. While the social world around me promotes a chronic striving for more and better strategies, sometimes peace comes from surrender — a recognition of my own limits in a particular moment. As an HSP, this level of self-attunement has been essential. I make my efforts and seek my answers, but I also know the outcomes aren’t entirely dependent on me and my modest abilities. 

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4. Spiritual direction supports a creative life.

Many HSPs, myself included, swear by creative outlets to process our experiences and stay attuned to ourselves in the midst of daily chaos. Many spiritual directors encourage or even incorporate the arts, since creativity can move us into a more integrated, soulful space. When entered playfully and freely, creativity can be a powerful means to witness the sacred within and around us. 

Of course, it’s never about artistic skill or the end product, but about reverence for what wants to come forth from us at this time. Creative practice can open the channels of the unconscious in and beyond ourselves. Spiritual direction honors creativity as vital for our spiritual exploration and development — an affinity that many HSPs may find naturally accessible.

5. Spiritual direction illuminates the path to purpose.

Living in a culture of personal development means we might be rich in self-knowledge, but what will we do with this awareness? As HSPs, it may have been a long road to understand our sensitivity, to push back against the culture’s demands for chronic productivity, and to create a life that honors our needs. But where will those choices intersect with “the world’s deep hunger,” as Frederick Buechner wrote? Will we retreat from the imposing world or will we find more skillful and inspired ways to engage with it? 

Spiritual direction calls us to grow into our personal strengths and to examine the inner and outer summons we each face — an invitation that complements an HSP’s natural thoughtfulness. As we ask ourselves about our calling — “What is mine to do?” — spiritual direction can help us move into the heart of that inquiry, embracing inner courage over societal expectation.

For HSPs, Spiritual Direction is an Ongoing Journey

You may wonder: How will we grow into the benefits of our high sensitivity? How will we nurture our well-being and resilience as we bring those gifts to our next authentic horizon? For me, it’s an ongoing journey made richer through the intimacy and illumination of spiritual companionship. It’s helped me view my life as a greater narrative with meaning and significance within and beyond the throes of personal challenges. And, as an HSP, it also means finally embracing my innate sensitivity and all that goes with it — heightened sensory perception, empathic tendencies, emotional acuteness, intuition — as a sacred part of that story.

So many of us struggle against ambiguities and loss of many kinds. We may have a hard time holding our energy against the enormity of the world’s strife, let alone its effects on our lives and wellbeing. That’s why I think spiritual direction offers HSPs a healing and enriching companionship along the path.

If you’re looking for a spiritual director, Spiritual Directors International is an inclusive, non-denominational organization that offers an index of spiritual directors by location, age, gender, and spiritual tradition. 

You might like:

4 Ways Being Highly Sensitive Is a Divine Gift to the World

How I Learned to Stop Absorbing Other People’s Emotions

5 Essential Things to Tell Your Therapist If You’re Highly Sensitive

The post How Spiritual Direction Can Help HSPs in Troubled Times appeared first on Highly Sensitive Refuge.

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[cohencohen0-blog]

three Sizzling Online Relationship Tips For Ladies Over forty

It is totally unimaginable what Asian lady need. This form of bullying usually makes boys avoid girls and avoid relationships with girls. If an honest lady would not show him what a optimistic relationship with a woman appears to be like like, he grows up to consider all ladies as monsters. After my marriage ended I fell in love hard… really onerous. If Hollywood was right about love, if fairy tales were true, he was without a doubt my one real love. When we had been together it was electric. He so inspired Eros in me that every one evening I'd tremble. My heart was more alive than ever, there was no approach I may sleep, my being was elated by the highest expression of all consuming love I might think about potential. It was as if every other love was nothing and for the first time I used to be experiencing real love. Nothing changed that, I never misplaced those emotions, even after five very stormy years of his abusive, broken, off and on love for me. Ultimately he married someone else and I used to be left processing what on earth occurred and how one can survive the pain of this unrequited love. That is to not say that there isn't some great reading out there that can help in personal transformation - however you may in all probability find it within the psychology part as a substitute. And naturally, when you've got an issue that persists or interferes with your on a regular basis life, seeking professional assist is probably a better possibility. Join face-to-face with trusted family and friends members. People who have been via painful breakups or divorces may be especially helpful. They know what it is like and so they can guarantee you that there's hope for therapeutic and new relationships. Frequent face-to-face contact can be a good way to relieve the stress of a breakup and regain steadiness in your life. Sometimes, I'll have the cheating spouse tell me that they are anxious that their partner is making improvements so that they'll exit and retaliate with their own cheating. This is not often the case, and truthfully, it's in everybody's finest interest that both events are as emotionally wholesome and assured as attainable. A part of restoring the trust is believing that you're robust enough to deal with what comes your manner. And individuals who have been wounded deeply will typically have work to do with a view to get to this place. Don't pursue him endlessly if he is advised you that he needs some time. He is genuinely asking you for some area and unless you give that to him, you may be disrespecting his needs. Be sure that he is aware of that you simply love him and then leave him be. Do not call him or attempt to contact him whereas he is taking his break. Instead, show him, from a distance, simply how spontaneous and unpredictable you're. Exit and take a brand new class or join a marathon. Do one thing that he wouldn't ever anticipate you to. In case you do that, you'll be silently drawing him back in by making him really feel completely drawn to you once more. 1. Step one to high self worth is to cease berating yourself. All of us criticise ourselves. Some do it continuously. This is one of the most damaging issues you are able to do together with your thought processes. Be compassionate with your self while you make errors, all of us make them. Give your self congratulations for the actual fact that you've got overcome your previous adversity and lived to combat one other day. No matter what painful experiences you've had in the past rejoice in the truth that they've helped to make you the individual you're right now - wiser and more capable.

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