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nofacedpoet · 11 months

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AWWT | Ch.14: Family

TW: pt.4 of this chapter contains self harm. There is additional spacing before and after this part to make it easier for those that want to quickly scroll to the next part.

(Pt.1)

Three years later….

“Happy fourteenth birthday, you fucking weirdo,” Valentine shoved Ava and she collided into Eren.

“Ouch,” Ava rubbed her arm.

“What should we do to celebrate?” Eren asked. “Rob the donut shop or-oh-wait I know. I can steal us some alcohol from—”

“No! Please-God-no,” Ava put her hand up to his face. “I only ask for one day of peace without you and Valentine causing havoc around here.”

Armin giggled. “You’re asking too far much from them.”

Eren sighed and crossed his arms. “No! I can do it,” he carried such little confidence as he glanced over at Valentine for reassurance. She smiled and nodded no. “I don’t know why you’re giving me that look as if you’re not the one that causes most of the chaos!”

“Shut up!” Valentine shoved him. “We all know it’s you,” she said under her breath.

“This!” Ava held her arms out in front of an ice cream shop that had a gigantic ice cream cone on the front. “Is all I want.”

They each got a 6-inch tall ice cream cone and sat on the side of the road as they raced to see who could finish theirs first. Ava got cotton candy and birthday cake, Valentine got chocolate, Eren got strawberries and cream, and Armin got lemon vanilla. Ava took a giant bite of her ice cream and Eren seized the opportunity. He leaned over and barley nudged the bottom of her cone to where the ice cream smooshed into her face. A bit got on her nose and he laughed.

“Eren!” She wiped it with her sleeve.

“What’d your parents say about you guys sleeping over at my house tonight?” Eren asked as he attempted to lick the side of the cone that dripped with ice cream.

“They were weird about it,” Ava shrugged. “Seemed really uncomfortable about the whole idea, really.”

“I’m not surprised,” Armin said. “Especially since the great disaster.” This is what they called the night in which all of their parents, except Armin’s grandad, freaked out and grounded all of them.

***

The four of them had originally planned to hang out but Armin and Ava decided that they wanted to do something more “fun”. Which in their opinion, consisted of their usual hobby of reading each other’s favorite books and conversing over the writing techniques, plot, and character analysis.

“I don’t want to do that boring nerdy stuff,” Eren pouted.

“We’re not asking you to,” Armin said. “And it isn’t nerdy stuff. It’s just interesting—”

“I don’t want to know,” Valentine interrupted.

“Well fine then,” Ava stood straight up with her hands on her waist. “Why don’t me and Armin hang at his place to do our nerdy stuff and you two can go do whatever weird shit you usually do when we’re not around.”

“We don’t do weird shit!” Eren crossed his arms and scowled.

Armin gave him a look of disbelief. “Spying on your neighbors with a telescope—”

“Or having burping contests,” Ava pinched her nose as she waved her hand out.

“Is weird!” Ava and Armin said at the same time.

Valentine and Eren glanced at one another. “Nah,” they said at the same time.

Ava sighed. “Whatever. If you need us, we’ll be doing nerdy stuff.” She grabbed Armin’s hand and walked off back toward his house. Armin glanced back with a light wave.

“C’mon, we don’t need them!” Eren snatched Valentine’s hand and stomped off back inside of his house.

Eren and Valentine played through most of his video games, wrestled one another (Valentine won each match), practiced throwing ice into each others mouths from across the room, made a specialty tea that Eren spat all over Valentine because he began to laugh as soon as he took a giant gulp, (she had to end up changing into one of his wrinkly shirts from his dirty pile because he still hadn’t done his laundry) and afterwords they cooled down with one of their favorite things to do: they took turns reading through their favorite mangas in a tone and voice that they thought fit the characters. It usually ended with them laughing so hard that they couldn’t even continue. And later that night, at about three in the morning, the great disaster took place.

Carla, Eren’s mother, had bursted through Eren’s door as if she was on a heist mission and was appalled at what she walked into. Her eyes widened as her jaw dropped and she gave the biggest gasp of her life. “Eren!” she screamed horrified.

Valentine and Eren were tangled up in blankets on his bed and completely passed out. Her left arm and leg danged off the edge of the bed as her head rested in a pile of Cool Ranch Doritos, which were Eren’s favorite. Eren laid half way on top her with his face smooshed into her right shoulder and his arm stretched out across her stomach as he drooled onto her.

“Grounded! Oh, you’re in so much trouble mister! A week! No! Three weeks!”

“Huh?” Eren opened one eye and slightly moved his head up. “Why are you screaming?” he said annoyed and slightly confused.

“Hm?” Valentine squinted her eyes open to see Eren’s saliva stretching like a spiderweb from the corner of his mouth onto a small puddle that absorbed into her shirt. “Ew! What the fuck, Eren!” she shoved him so hard that he fell back on the floor.

While this chaos unleashed, there was another war zone happening at Armin’s house. Unlike Valentine and Eren, Ava and Armin were still awake. They were camping inside of tent in the corner of his room with a starry sky projector. Inside, they squished into the same sleeping bag and whispered back and forth and giggled about certain chapters of the books that they were reading with their tiny flashlights.

BANG! Armin’s bedroom door slammed open so hard that it nearly cracked the wall behind it. They gasped and both glanced at each other with wide eyes.

“It’s the alien monster,” Armin trembled as he and Ava squeezed each others hands. The zipper of the tent ripped open to unveil a very upset Mila glaring down at the both of them as if they had done the worst thing in the world.

“I’m really sorry about that,” Armin’s grandfather could be heard saying from the background. “I assumed it was alright.”

“Really, Ava?” Mila said in the most disappointing tone that Ava had ever heard from her. “And where is Valentine?” She stretched an eyebrow so high that it nearly left her forehead.

Armin and Ava glanced at one another for a long moment. Then Ava slowly moved her gaze back to Mila. “I don’t know,” she answered quietly.

“Armin,” Mila said.

Armin’s eyes widened but he kept his stare on Ava, who wasn’t even looking at him anymore. “Yes ma’am?” he said politely as he refused to make eye contact.

“Do you know where she is? Or Eren? Are they together?”

Armin began to tremble as he struggled to get his lips to make out a response.

Mila sighed. “I guess I have a pretty good idea where she might be. Let’s go, Ava.”

When they reached Eren’s house, it only got weirder. Mila put her hands on her head as she stared at Eren’s shirt that Valentine wore. “Oh my God,” she walked off with Carla and they both whispered back and forth in the corner as they shook their heads and occasionally glanced back at them.

“It’s just a shirt,” Eren mumbled. “What the hell is going on?” He scratched his head.

“So how long do you think this time?” Ava said exhausted.

“Three weeks,” Valentine said. “We’re definitely all grounded for three weeks.”

***

“I still don’t understand why we were in so much trouble that night.” Armin shook his head. “I mean, I get that we didn’t explain to any of them that we split plans but was it really worth the freak out and drama?”

“If we’re going to get yelled at and grounded, they should at least tell us what we did that was so forbidden!” Eren said annoyed.

“Parents are so weird.” Ava giggled. “Anyways, they eventually did say yes to tonight.”

“What?!” Armin screamed. “Really?”

“Yeah,” Valentine said. “They just want to have a talk with Eren’s parents and your grandad to ensure that we’re all going to be in the same place.”

Eren rolled his eyes. “My parents also want to talk to them first. And they made it a rule that we all have to sleep in the living room,” he sighed. “I cleaned my entire room for no reason!”

Armin shrugged. “At least we get to have another sleepover together. I thought they’d never allow us again.”

Later that night…

They made an entire fort in the center of Eren’s living room with blankets and sheets with pillows inside. Snacks scattered everywhere as they sat in a circle and prepared for the long awaited birthday finale, the gift exchange.

“Alright, mine first!” Eren slammed his gift in front of Ava. It looked like a crumbled up paper ball. Ava was certain that it was another joke of his and that there was nothing in there at all. Last year, he claimed that his present was his friendship.

“Hm. I wonder.” Ava began to tear through it. There was a small 2x2 black box in the center of all the wrinkly paper but still, she was certain it was nothing. She shook it a few times and could hear something hitting the edge of the box. She gasped and her eyes lit up. “You actually got me something?”

Eren crossed his arms. “It’s not anything crazy, so don’t get your hopes up.”

She paused for a moment as she glanced at the box as if her life would never be the same after she opened it. Then, she hesitantly slid the top lid off. Her eyes widened as her lips slowly parted. Eren refused to watch and instead stared off into the other direction.

“Well what is it?” Valentine asked. Armin leaned over and gasped.

“It-” Ava’s eyes watered. “It’s the necklace.” She slowly moved her gaze up to Eren, who was still staring off into nothing. “Eren,” she said in a somewhat serious tone. “Why did you get this?”

Ava had wanted this necklace for months. Every time they walked down Shop Avenue, she’d always stop by this one shop just to stare at it through a small glass case. She knew that she could never afford it but just seeing it was enough for her. It was a four petal flower that had a different colored gem on each petal. Each one reminded her of each of them. The yellow was Armin due to his soft and warm nature. The red was Eren due to his passionate rage. The green was Valentine due to her explorations. The pink represented Ava just because that was her favorite color. And in the center laid a white gem that connected all of them together. That one was special. It represented a pureness of their friendships that could never dull.

“You must’ve saved up months of allowance for this,” Ava’s voice nearly broke. “I-I can’t accept it.” She laid the box in her lap and stared into it with regret.

Eren rolled his eyes and glanced at her finally. “You think my allowance could pay for that? I stole some of my parents money.” Ava gasped.

He was lying but only Armin and Valentine knew that. He did extra work around his house and even some yard work for nearby neighbors to save up for it. It was the first time that Armin and Valentine had ever seen him put so much effort into one thing.

“It’s not like they’ll know! Plus, you’ve always wanted that. Just enjoy it. It’s not like the shop takes returns anyway.” His cheeks blushed but he tried to look as unbothered as possible.

Ava grinned and moved her gaze back to the necklace. “Thank you.”

“Yeah, yeah,” Eren waved his hand.

She pinched two fingers on either side of the chain and carefully took it out of the box like she was defusing a bomb. A massive grin stretched on her face as she wrapped it around her neck and Eren helped her hook it on. She caught Eren smiling but he quickly wiped it off and looked away.

“Okay-okay, open mine now!” Armin scooted his neatly wrapped gift across the floor toward Ava. It had a fluffy pink bow on top.

She gently took the bow off to where it wouldn’t break and unwrapped the box. “Oh my gosh! You did not!” She yanked a hoodie out that had a pear with a face on it. It was an odd clothing brand that was some weird joke between the two of them. Eren and Valentine never understood it and never really cared too. “I cannot believe you actually got it!” She laughed as she put it on.

“You can add it to your collection,” Armin said.

“Our collection,” she smiled at him. They usually borrowed each other’s shirts and hoodies. Especially when it came to that collection.

“Okay, let’s just get this over with already,” Valentine slid a box over. It wasn’t wrapped at all but it was in a box at least.

“Hm,” Ava smiled as she opened it. She glanced inside and her eyes widened. She reached in and pulled out a handful of books. “No way…the entire collection?!” She had mentioned this series, titled “Monsters”, subtly to Valentine years ago. She didn’t have the money when the final copies were sold and complained about how she could never obtain the only copy from the library because it was always checked out. “But I thought no other copies existed?” Ava said in awe as she held the first book up like it was gold.

“There isn’t. It was a real bitch to hunt down one of the owners and even a bigger bitch to make a deal. But they finally budged. And I didn’t have to kill them for it,” Valentine said.

Ava glanced at her with watery eyes and Valentine looked away. “Thank you,” Ava whispered.

“Don’t make a big deal,” Valentine said. “They’re just books.”

They giggled as they passed around a flashlight and confessed their biggest secrets that they only entrusted in one another. At first, Armin didn’t want to play and claimed that he had no secrets to tell but each time the flashlight made its way around to him, Eren pressed him.

“Seriously Armin, you have to tell us at least one secret. Something you’ve never told anyone, ever.” Eren gave him a devious smile.

Armin sighed as he glanced to the side at Eren’s shadow that smeared against one of the sheets of their fort. He squeezed onto the flashlight between his hands that aimed directly from under his face. He moved his attention back to Eren with a look of exhaustion. “Sorry. I just don’t feel very good. I don’t have anything.” He opened his hand so the flashlight rolled out and made its way toward Eren.

Eren’s eyes widened. He leaned in to grab the flashlight and whispered, “Did you take your medicines today?”

Armin scowled. “Eren,” he crossed his arms. Anytime anyone brought this topic up, he became severely uncomfortable and slightly agitated. He didn’t like to talk about it. All they knew was what he told them, which was that after what happened to his parents, he had been directed to use certain medications daily.

“I’m just asking.” Eren stared into the flashlight. “You said you didn’t feel good, so—”

“Okay.” Armin wanted this conversation to end already.

“Someone else go then.” Eren flipped the flashlight in his hand to where the handle faced outwards.

“I guess I can go,” Valentine grabbed it.

“Oh, this is going to be good.” Eren shoved some popcorn into his mouth.

They all got situated in their spots to where they faced her.

Valentine aimed the flashlight to where it was partly hitting her face. Most of it beamed alongside her face and stretched behind her. She stared into a single piece of popcorn that laid on the floor. “I…did something.” Her tone shifted into a dark and mysterious one. She hesitated to fully glance up at the others.

“Well, what is it?” Ava asked. Valentine slowly parted her lips as if to speak then sealed them again.

“Ah, c’mon. It can’t be that bad.” Eren laughed. “It’s not like you killed someone.” Valentine’s eyes slightly widened and their was a few seconds of pure silence. Armin and Eren glanced at one another. Ava stared at Valentine with wide eyes and didn’t bother to break it when Armin and Eren glanced at her. Eren moved his gaze back to Valentine, who was still staring downward. She didn’t want to see their reactions. “Did you?” Eren finally broke the long silence.

She slowly moved her gaze to meet Eren’s eyes. She was perplexed to see a calmness in his eyes. He didn’t even look slightly alarmed, just a bit surprised.

“Two,” she answered in almost a whisper as if she didn’t want to really admit it.

Armin’s eyes widened as he slightly moved his head back. He had always known that Valentine was violent but he would’ve never imagined that she actually killed people before.

“Well, did they deserve it?” Eren asked with a completely unbothered expression.

“Yeah. They did.” Valentine glanced over at Ava, who was still staring with shock at the fact that she admitted that. They had all been friends for years now but this was the ultimate test of trust. One that could change everything forever.

“Well then,” Eren smiled from the corner of his mouth. “There’s two less shitty people on this earth.”

This time, Valentine was the one that was taken aback. But she was grateful of his reaction. “Yeah.”

“I’ve killed too,” Eren admitted. Everyone jerked their heads toward him.

“You don’t have to say that to try and make me feel better,” Valentine glanced to the side.

“I’m serious,” Eren admitted. “Armin was the only one that ever knew. Until now.”

They all glanced at Armin and he sort of shrunk in himself as if he was the one that did the actual crime. Valentine and Ava caught each other’s eye for a moment before Valentine glanced back at Eren. “What happened?” she asked with a sort of relief that she wasn’t the only one in the group that managed to do this.

“They were trying to kidnap this girl, one of my father’s patients. They killed her parents and took her hostage. They were animals and deserved the death they got!” He crushed a popcorn inside of his hand.

“Four less shitty people,” Valentine said.

“Hm,” Eren smiled. “Yeah.” He moved his gaze to Armin and caught his eye. “By the way…” his tone shifted a more serious and angry one. “I’d kill for any of you if it ever came down to it.”

Armin’s eyes slowly widened. “Don’t say that,” he whispered.

“I mean it,” Eren’s tone was stern. He and Armin stared at one another for a few long seconds in silence.

“Alright. Don’t get all emotional now,” Valentine grabbed the piece of popcorn from the floor and tossed it at Eren.

“You’re the most emotional one here!” Eren grabbed a handful of popcorn and threw it at her. Some of it got on Ava.

“Eren!” Ava laughed as she grabbed whatever snack was closest, which was chocolate covered almonds, and chunked it at him.

“Ouch! Those hurt!” Eren shouted as he grabbed a water bottle.

“No! Eren—” Armin tried to get up to move but it was too late. Water splashed everywhere and on everyone.

Armin, Valentine, and Ava gasped as they glanced down at the mess. Eren started laughing. “That’s what you all get!”

“That’s it,” Ava grabbed a water bottle and yanked her arm around to spill water on everyone.

“What did I do?” Armin tried to shield himself.

Within seconds, the inside of the fort had turned into a massive food and water fight.

Eren decided that they had to do something crazy for Ava’s birthday, even if it was subtle. After much debate, mostly from Ava and Armin who absolutely hated doing most things that consisted of trouble, it was settled that they would all sneak out of the house to their secret spot. This consisted of a ten minute hike to an abandoned and collapsed house that sat on the edge of a mountain. It overlooked the entire city of Shiganshina with all of its beautiful mountains and city lights. It was like being in a secret world that was only theirs and it was always more magical at night.

When they finally reached this majestical place, Armin and Valentine sat on the edge of a giant slab of cement that laid off the edge of the mountain with a huge drop right below it. They swung their feet back and forth as they took in the view. Meanwhile, Ava and Eren, who both refused to get that close to the edge, stayed back and giggled in the background. Eren put his right earphone in Ava’s ear and placed the other in his. He put on one of their favorite songs, one that he swore was made for her, and they held hands as they pretended to know how to dance. He couldn’t dance for shit, and neither could she, but he had always teased that he would have his first dance with her. This was the closest thing to it.

Valentine subtly glanced at Armin and noticed that he was wearing one of Eren’s hoodies, which looked odd on him since they had contrasting styles of clothing. But he didn’t have a choice in the matter because it was chilly out and he hadn’t brought his own pullover to the sleep over because he hadn’t planned on sneaking out at three in the morning. He clutched tightly onto the strings that dangled from the neck line as he stared out into the view. The light from the full moon gently caressed the surface of his skin and the soft blonde peach fuzz that brushed against his cheeks sort of glimmered. It had a similar effect on his blonde hair, which looked as if it contained bits of glitter. The way the blue toned moonlight hit the iris of his big blue eyes made it seem as if they were slightly illuminating. Valentine always admired these small glimpses that she captured of Armin and would collect them in her mind as if it was an album made just for him. They were rare but always so…

“Beautiful.”

Armin slightly moved his head as he was taken out of whatever thought he was stuck in. He turned and glanced at Valentine with his big blue eyes. “Hm?”

Now that he was facing her, she could see the full portrait of him. And now, she could tell that there was a gloominess clouded inside of his eyes. “Did you say something?” he asked with his usual soft and gentle tone.

“No,” she said in almost a whisper. Her chest became heavy. Why hadn’t she noticed that gloominess before?

“Oh.” He stared for a second. “Alright.” He moved his gaze back to the city lights.

Valentine hesitated for a moment. “Armin…” she said in a serious tone that still had a gentleness to it.

“Hm?” He turned to look at her again.

“You know you’re one of my bestest friends.”

He looked a bit confused. “Yeah? And you’re one of mine.” He smiled. His smile was so warm, as usual, but there was something off about it tonight.

“Yeah. So that’s why I need to ask you…”

The smile slowly faded from Armin’s face. “What is it?”

“Are you-” she glanced to the side to ensure that Eren and Ava weren’t paying attention and leaned in a bit closer to Armin. “Are you alright? Like alright, alright?”

Armin’s eyes widened and he quickly looked away. He moved his head to where his blonde hair covered the side of his face to shield her out. “Why would you ask that?” His tone was incredibly heavy now.

“Well…like I said. You’re one of my bestest friends. I want to make sure you’re alright and I want you to be able to tell me if you’re ever not.”

Armin moved his hands to the outside of his legs and clutched onto the edge of the cement as he stared downwards at the drop. He didn’t respond.

Valentine looked toward the lights. “I won’t bring it up again.”

There was a long silence and it felt like a dark invisible entity had made its way between them. Then, the silence broke with the sound of nails scratching against concrete. She glanced down to see his fingers now squeezing tightly onto the edge of the cement. She slowly moved her gaze up to him but could still only see his hair. His breathing became heavier and his entire body began to tremble. Is he just really cold? Valentine leaned forward a bit to peak around the curtain of his hair. Her eyes widened as she realized his face was completely drenched with tears. He clenched his teeth and scrunched his eyes shut as if it was taking everything he had to hold them back. She slowly leaned back.

“Do you…want me to do anything?” she asked.

“I’m sorry,” he sniffed his nose. “I just,” he tried to keep his tone down so no one else could hear that he was crying. “I really don’t want to be a bother.” He wiped his face with the sleeve of the hoodie.

“Armin,” Valentine said in a serious tone. “You’re not a bother.”

He glanced at her as a tear dropped from his eye and slid down his cheek. The bottom of his eyes were red now. “A-are you sure?” He struggled to speak through his tears.

Valentine extended her hand out to him with the palm faced up and her fingers just slightly curled. He glanced at it for a moment before placing his hand in hers.

“You’re my fucking best friend, idiot,” she said.

This made him laugh. “I know, but—”

“Armin, I’m telling you.” He looked at her and noticed her serious expression. “You’re not a bother. If you were, I’d simply tell you.”

He gave a small broken laugh and wiped his face with his other hand. “Yeah, I guess that’s true.” He glanced toward the city with sad eyes. “I’m really not okay…” he squeezed her hand and everything that came after was a shock to Valentine.

He told her everything that he’d been going through and it wasn’t just recently. Armin had been struggling silently for years. She realized that all of this time, Armin was enduring a mental torture and none of them knew. This made her feel incredibly guilty as a friend. He admitted that he thought about his parents every single day and blamed himself for their deaths because he should’ve prevented them from going. He felt like a complete idiot for placing Eren in that position and wondered a lot of the time of what it would look like if he had lost all of his friends in the balloon that day.

He revealed that he had nightmares nearly every night, seeing his parents die over and over again, and sometimes his friends. The medication helped him to not have as many nightmares but it still couldn’t block them all the time. He was surprised and slightly relieved that Valentine knew what it felt like as she admitted that she also had night terrors and Ava had to wake her up a lot of the time. She tried to explain to him that the incident with his parents had nothing to do with him and that he shouldn’t blame himself for that. Then, as their conversation deepened, he revealed one of the biggest secrets of all…

“Wow.” Valentine stared at him with wide eyes. “I would’ve never guessed that.”

He laughed. “I hope not.”

“Do you think you’ll ever tell him?”

“I don’t know.” He glanced forward and a light gust of wind brushed his hair back. His hair looked so soft. “I doubt that he feels the same way towards me and I would hate to ruin our friendship by making it awkward. So probably not.”

Valentine held her pinky out towards him and Armin squeezed it with his. He released a giant sigh of relief.

“Hey!” a voice called out as a bright light shined onto them. They both glanced back to see a soldier making his way toward them but struggling to get through the rubble fast enough. “The hell you kids doin up here?!”

They all gasped and glanced at each other. “Shit! MPs!” Eren bolted before giving anyone else a chance to react.

“Uh!” Ava hesitated for a moment then chased after him. Armin and Valentine jumped to their feet and followed.

“Get back here!” a second MP made his way through the rubble and followed after them. His light flashed back and forth as he chased them.

They laughed as they zig-zagged down the road and watched the MPs struggle to catch up. Nothing else matters in the world than this moment right here, Armin thought as his face warmed up and blushed. Running down a brick road, at four in the morning, with my bestest friends, being chased by MPs, with a full moon and sky full of stars. It’s perfect.

(pt.2)

It had been two weeks since Valentine and Ava saw the boys. Eren was grounded due to something terrible that he refused to explain to them and Armin caught a bad flu. Ava and Valentine were filled with boredom since they were so used to spending nearly everyday with Eren and Armin. While on their time away from them, Valentine’s behavior had shifted into a more somber one. At first, Ava teased that it must be separation anxiety since she’s been away from her partner in crime sidekick, Eren, for longer than usual. But then Ava realized that her behavior became even stranger.

Valentine would wake up in the middle of the night and walk around the house to ensure that everyone was alright and all of the doors were locked up. She had never done that. Some nights, she would sit outside mumbling strange words to herself as she drank herself off until she could pass back out again. She also never did that before.

And on this day, she sat on the room floor staring into a book that had been the same page for two hours. Rain slammed against their bedroom window and a loud thunder roared so heavy that it shook the walls. The light flickered a few times before shutting off completely.

“Ugh. Great. I was nearly done reading this page,” Valentine mumbled.

Ava, who was laying down on the bed counting the number of spit balls on the ceiling, rolled over to face Valentine. “You know what we should do?”

“Hm,” Valentine said unamused.

“We should go play in the rain!” Ava said excitingly. “We haven’t done that in awhile!”

“Mm.”

Ava tilted her head. “You love playing in the rain. We can play hide and seek and you can be the seeker!”

Valentine shut the book and stared at the cover. “I really think we should just stay inside today—”

“Okay, I’m going!” Ava jumped off the bed. “You better come find me or I’ll be waiting for nothing!” She quickly slipped on her rains boots and ran out the door before Valentine could say no.

“Ava,” Valentine glanced toward the door with annoyance. She sighed and slowly stood up. She slipped on her boots and dragged her way toward the bedroom doorway. She peaked her head down the hall as if something was going to be waiting for her. All of the lights in the cabin were still shut off and there wasn’t a bit of sound. Not even a small mumble of talking or laughing from their parents. “Mila?” Valentine turned to face the other direction. “Hm. That’s weird. Where are they?” She walked into the living room and glanced around. The front door was cracked open and rain was pouring in. She had just realized that she hadn’t seen Mila or Mannie all day. She wasn’t sure of whether that was because she was in her own world or if they had left somewhere. Regardless, she felt incredibly uneasy.

She opened the door and hesitantly stepped one foot outside. She watched as her boot drowned into a puddle. “Better just get this over with,” she pulled herself outside completely and slammed the door behind her. The rain poured down so hard that it felt like small needles colliding into her skin. It was so intense that she could barely see anything a foot in front of her. It also didn’t help that there was a heavy immense fog clouding the air, which also made it hard to breathe.

“Ava?” she called out but the rain was so loud that she could barely hear her own voice. She put her hands above her eyes to shield the rain from her face and began to walk further into the forest. The ground carried a thick slushy mud with giant puddles of water everywhere. “Can’t exactly track her with this shit.” As she made her way further into the murky forest, she realized that the feeling which she felt for the past two weeks had strengthened significantly. She stopped in her tracks and stood for a moment. Her chest became heavy and her lungs felt like they were collapsing. She tried to take a deep breath but the air was too thick. She leaned over with her hands on her knees and realized that they were trembling. The rain was getting louder now and her eyes were becoming blurry with all the rain in them. The air became denser and colder and she began to shiver. Lightening struck from nearby and caused the ground to shake all around her. “Agh,” she fell back on the ground and landed into a massive muddy puddle. She tried to breathe through her mouth but incidentally inhaled a bunch of water and choked. She heard the sound of cracking wood from nearby and glanced in the direction, yet she still couldn’t see anything. BOOM! There was a giant crash from the other direction and she jerked her head towards it. Did the lightening knock a tree down? I’m certain it came from the other direction.

She made her way to her knees and noticed that the ground in that particular area felt different. Huh? She crawled a bit more and felt area with her hands. She found where the sinking mud stopped and became normal again. I don’t understand, is this a track? If so, what kind of animal can be that huge… Her eyes widened as she felt a presence behind her. It was one that she had never felt before but knew was massive and sent chills down her spine. She slowly turned around to be met with an eye of a titan staring directly at her. It was leaning down towards her and seemed like it’d been there for a few seconds. They stared at one another quietly for what felt like the longest minute of her life. Then, it huffed as if to sniff her and there was a massive wind that blew against her face.

“Ahh!” Ava screamed from the forest. Valentine broke out of her frozen stare down and realized that Ava was still out there somewhere. The titan moved its gaze in the direction of the scream and slowly stood and faded into the fog above. Valentine bolted towards her best guess of the direction in which Ava was.

“Ava! Where are you?!” Valentine looked around in circles but only saw a heavy fog surrounding her. I’m not going to reach her fast enough. Is that the only one out here? If there’s one, there’s surely more. How many more-

“Valentine!” Ava’s voice screamed from the left. Valentine bolted in that direction. Please be okay. Please be okay- BANG! She collided into something and gasped as she stumbled back. It was Ava.

Ava’s eyes were big and full of a terror that Valentine had never witnessed on her before. “Th-there’s a t-t-t-I-I saw—” she was shaking so bad and could barely get her words out at all.

“Ava, listen to me.” Valentine squeezed her hand. “We have to run. And don’t stop. Just run!”

“Hey! Kid! Can you hear me?” a Garrison soldier kneeled down on one knee as he shook Valentine by the shoulders. “Where are your parents? Are there others?” Valentine stared straight through him like he wasn’t even there. He glanced up to another soldier and nodded. A nearby soldier screamed as he was snatched by a titan.

“Gah-damn it! We gotta go!” The soldier snatched Valentine up. “Listen, you’re going to have to hang on. We don’t have time to run. We’re flying!” Valentine nodded and clutched onto him. “You got her?” he asked a second soldier that carried Ava. “Let’s go!” They launched their ODM gear and headed for the inner city of Shiganshina.

When they got there, it was pure chaos. Alarms went off in every direction. Canons fired off as soldiers attempted to hold the titans back from reaching any further inside of the city. Some people were being eaten alive by titans. Most people were fighting each other for a spot on the last boat that was already filled and getting ready for departure to the other side of Wall Maria, the only escape route. The soldiers that held Ava and Valentine struggled to get through the crowd and decided that it was best for only one to attempt to fight his way through with both girls.

“Let us on! Please don’t leave us here!” a woman screamed.

“Children only!” a guard yelled from the entrance of the boat.

“You’re going to let me on that damn boat or I’ll kill you for it!” A man threatened as he got in the guards face. He pulled a knife out and a separate guard tackled him into the crowd.

BOOM! There was a loud stomp from nearby and everyone glanced back to see a titan that made its way through the canon fire and was now heading straight for them. Everyone screamed in panic and began to shove each other to get on the boat. Some drowned in the crowd and were trampled on. Others attempted to risk their life and jump from the ledge toward the boat, all of which fell straight to their deaths due to the immediate impact of water or due to drowning.

“Go! Get them out of here!” the guard screamed as he waved his hand up to motion the other soldiers. The boat nudged forward a bit and slowly began to move.

“Wait!” the soldier that held both Valentine and Ava tried to shove his way through. “I have two more children!”

The guard waved his hands for the soldier to toss them over the people that stood between them. He tossed Valentine first, then Ava. The guard threw them into the boat and they both landed on a few other children. The boat nudged a bit more and began to move faster now. Screams erupted as the titan made its way to the crowd and began to snatch people up from the ground.

“Don’t leave us!” a man yelled as he shoved through the guard at an attempt to make it on the boat. Yet, they both fell off the ledge to their immediate deaths.

The children cried and screamed of panic as they watched their friends, family, and homes being ripped to shreds by the very giants that they had only ever heard stories of.

“Grandad!” a painful and broken voice screamed.

Valentine gasped and glanced up to see Armin down the boat. He reached his hand out toward the chaos as tears streamed down his face. His grandad waved to him as he tried to hold a brave face. He screamed something out to Armin but it was much too loud to hear.

Valentine and Ava made their way towards Armin. When they finally reached him, Ava wrapped her arms tightly around him and squeezed as she cried. Armin could barely hold himself up and collapsed to his knees as he weeped of pain. Valentine glanced around and found Eren a few feet away. He sat and stared straight ahead with wide eyes. She made her way towards him and silently sat beside him.

When they reached the other side of Wall Maria, it was fairly silent as everyone glared and gave them disgusted expressions. There was a few murmured remarks here and there through the crowd.

“Ugh, just look at them. Should’ve let the poor bastards just die with their parents.”

“Who’s supposed to look after these damn orphans? It isn’t coming out of my taxpayer money is all I’m saying.”

“Damn gruts. They’re going to eat all of our food and take all of our resources!”

“Do you think the titans will break through our wall as well?”

The boat came to a halt and a garrison soldier approached the entrance gate to let them off. He gave them a gross expression as if they were a disease that made its way to his home. “Well hurry it up!” He yelled angrily. “We don’t have all day. Get the hell off!”

“Dirty gruts,” another soldier mumbled underneath his breath as he glared at them.

(pt.3)

It was a long two years for the refugee children of Shiganshina. The usual behavior they faced from commoners and soldiers consisted of being spat on, shoved around, laughed at, made fun of, treated unfairly, punished for no reason a lot of the time, forced to work without pay, and forced to eat left overs after the commoners had their share, if there was any left that was. They were forced to live in a secluded area away from the commoners.

Valentine scooted her tray away that had one scoop of old mashed potatoes. “Eat.”

Armin sighed. “Valentine, stop it. You keep giving your share away to everyone else and you need to eat too.”

“I’m fine,” she sounded weak. “I can handle it. You three split it.”

“Get to work, you damn grut!” a nearby soldier yelled as he kicked one of the Shiganshina refugees down on the ground. He dug his boot into his back and forced him to his stomach. Other nearby soldiers laughed. Eren clenched his fists and began to tremble with anger.

“Just leave it,” Armin glanced at him. “You barely got out of the hole yesterday.”

The hole was a giant 15-meter hole in the ground that was filled with sewage. It was where the soldiers would send the refugees for punishment or if they did any little thing that the soldiers didn’t like. They would usually leave them for days at a time without anything to eat or drink. Since it was outside, it would be scorching hot during the day and extremely cold at night. Over the last two years, nearly 100 refugees died in that hole.

Valentine glanced at Eren with heavy eyes. She and Eren were always in and out of the hole. They were a lot alike and weren’t the type to take any shit from anyone, especially the soldiers. One soldier walked behind Valentine and smacked his lips as he glared at the back of her head. “Fucking grut bitch,” he mumbled under his breath. It was the same soldier that she always got into with the most. Ava glanced at Valentine and subtly nodded her head no. Valentine sighed.

“Why aren’t you eating, grut?” The soldier walked to beside the table and glared down at Valentine. “Is it not good enough for you? Maybe we should take away your eating privileges for a week.”

Eren clenched his jaw. The soldier reached for her tray and dragged it all the way to the edge of the table until it fell. The potatoes splattered everywhere on the ground. “Oops,” he said.

A nearby soldier watched from a few feet away and laughed. “Careful with that one. She has a temper, now.”

The soldier leaned closer to her. “Pick it up.”

Valentine slowly moved her gaze to him. “No,” she said calmly. Nearby refugees gasped as they watched.

“What did you just say to me?” he leaned a little closer.

“Are you deaf?”

The soldier’s jaw tightened. “That’s it—”

Valentine grabbed his head and slammed it against the table so hard that it broke his nose. He fell back on the ground and groaned.

“Get the damn grut, she’s back in the hole!” a soldier yelled. A separate soldier grabbed her by the back of the collar and threw her to the ground.

“Hey!” Ava yelled as she, Armin, and Eren all stood.

The soldier attempted to hold her down but Eren tackled him to the ground and began to punch his face over and over. “You bitch! Don’t you touch her!” Eren screamed.

More soldiers began to make their way over now.

“It’s just a misunderstanding!” Armin pleaded with his hands up. “Please, let them off!”

“Don’t fight back!” Ava screamed. “Please!” She knew it would only mean more time in the hole and was exhausted from constantly worrying everyday if she’d ever see them again.

Valentine punched one of the soldiers in the face and kicked the other in the head, knocking both of them down. A third soldier threw a fist at her and she dodged it and upper cut him so hard that his bottom jaw cracked. Other soldiers held Eren and began to beat him.

“No, get off of him!” Valentine screamed as she ran towards him. Four soldiers yanked her back.

“Get down, now!” They threw her to the ground and shoved her face into the dirt. “You dirty fucking grut!”

“Stop!” Ava cried with her hands over her head.

They shoved Eren to the ground beside Valentine to where they faced each other. They couldn’t help but laugh.

“You think this is funny?! Get up!” The soldiers yanked them up. “Back to the hole for these two.”

\\\

“How long do you think this time?” Eren asked as he leaned against the wall of the hole and stared up at the distant sky.

Valentine stood across on the other side as they weren’t allowed to be too close. She sighed and studied the human waste along the walls. “Who knows. A week maybe.”

“Wouldn’t be our worst.”

“Yeah.” She moved her gaze to Eren. He looked so exhausted and defeated. He had a black eye and streams of dried blood that stained from underneath each of his nostrils onto his shirt. “You shouldn’t have done that for me by the way. It was my fight. Not yours.”

He sighed as he rested the back of his head on the wall and glanced at her. “I don’t know how many times I have to tell you this. I’m never going to just stand by and let them or anyone ever touch you. Ever.” Valentine rolled her eyes. “I’ll always fight for you. For all of you,” Eren said in a more gentle tone.

She smiled from the corner of her mouth. “But you kind of got your ass beat.”

“Yeah, well,” he glanced away. “I guess I’ll just keep getting my ass beat for you then.”

She laughed and shook her head. “You’re an idiot. But I’ll always fight for you, too.”

(pt.4) ***TW: pt.4 contains self harm.

“I’m just”—Ava squeezed her arms tightly together as streams of tears fell from her face—“a bystander. And that’s all I’ll ever be.” Her lips trembled. “I hate myself,” she whispered.

Armin’s eyes widened. “Ava,” he said softly. “Don’t say things like that.”

“I do,” she admitted. “I’m such a fucking waste. I can’t even save my friends from being hurt. I can’t save them from anything. All I ever do is just watch,” she covered her mouth as she began to weep.

Armin put his arms around her. He knew exactly how she was feeling because he felt that way his entire life. But he’d never admit that to her or anyone else ever. It always worried him when Ava got this bad because he knew how dark her thoughts could become. One time, it became so bad that he caught her attempting to harm herself.

***

“Ava, stop it!” he cried as he yanked the piece of glass from her. He hadn’t even realized that his hand was bleeding from how hard he grasped onto it.

“I’m sorry,” she cried. “I’m so sorry.”

She made him promise to never tell anyone about that moment, especially Valentine.

***

He gulped down to try to fight back his tears as he held her. “All we can do is just be there for them as much as we can, in whatever way we can. It’ll be alright.”

(pt.5)

Valentine grabbed her tray that had cheddar soup, crackers, half a piece of toast, and a canteen of water that read, “Cadet Sakleysi”. She glanced down the long and crowded room that filled with new recruits on the first day of training.

Valentine was the last to get her tray of food due to an extra 5-mile run punishment she was ordered to after training practice. There were a number of odd glances and whispers as she made her way through the crowd. “How the hell did she finish her punishment that fast? Did they let her off easy?” “Is that the one that got into with drill instructor Miko?” “Yeah. I wouldn’t mess with her. Did you see how quick she knocked him down? “That’s a man three times her size.”

“Well if you ask me, it sounds like you’re asking for a challenge!” a voice screamed over everyone else’s and caused most of the chatter to die down and everyone glanced in the direction from which it came.

“Oh yeah?! Well bring it on, horse face!” Eren’s voice screamed.

Valentine’s eyes widened. “Shit!” She took off toward the chaos but struggled to get through the crowd that surrounded the scene. “Fight! Fight!” the crowd cheered.

“Move it!” Valentine violently ripped through everyone and made her way to the front. Armin and Ava had their hands over their faces. Eren was in a stand off with another cadet that was much taller than him. They both held their fists up but neither was really making the first move. Valentine sighed as she threw her tray down on the table and everyone took a few steps back from her.

The cadet that stood across from Eren was about to throw his fist when Valentine ran towards him and pushed him so hard that he flew into the cadets that stood behind him.

“Ohhh!” the crowd screamed of excitement. This was the best action they had gotten the entire day. Other than Valentine’s scene earlier with the drill instructor.

She glanced down at the cadet that was now on the floor. “If you want to a fight, then fight me.”

The cadet glanced up at her with wide eyes then bursted out into laughter. Nearby watchers gasped as they glanced back at Valentine to watch her reaction.

“Huh?” she said confused. She never received that reaction before. Is this guy insane? Maybe he doesn’t know who I am—

“Valentine, right?” the cadet said as he struggled to stand up.

Her eyes widened. So he does know who I am and he isn’t afraid? More of the crowd around began to move further away to prepare for a disaster. “Yeah,” Valentine answered as she glared at him.

He glanced down at her and put his hands up as he gave a warm and friendly smile. “I’m not about to fight you, okay? I know you’ll beat my ass. I was just messing with Eren anyway. It was all jokes!”

“It didn’t look like much of a joke to me.”

“Look, I’ll even make a truce,” he walked up to Eren and extended his hand out to him. The crowd moaned of disappointment as they scattered back to their tables and groups. “Truce?” the cadet asked with a smile.

“Yeah, fine. Whatever.” Eren firmly grabbed his hand and they shook.

Jean leaned in a bit more to where only Eren could hear him. “This is also a shake to say that I will graduate above you in the top five.”

Eren snatched his hand away. “My ass!” This entire quarrel began because they quickly realized in training that they were each others biggest competition for a spot in the top five. Then soon enough, the argument became more so of who was going to be above who in the top five.

The cadet turned to face Valentine and put his arms out as if to invite her for a hug. “See? We’re cool now.” Eren could be heard growling from behind him. “I’m Jean, by the way,” he extended his hand out to Valentine.

She gave him a stern stare as she walked up to him and snatched his hand tightly. “If you ever mess with my friends again,” she said in a low threatening tone that let him know she wasn’t kidding, “I’ll beat your ass.”

“Yeah. I get it,” he said with a smile as he shook her hand. “Truce.”

///

“Go, go, go!” drill instructor Thomas yelled through the hard pouring rain. “If your squirrel asses don’t make it to this gah-damn line in two minutes, you’re done for! I don’t want to see your ugly face back in this training again!”

Cadets were performing the first of many difficult courses in training. It consisted of flying through the rainy forest on ODM gear that they had only learned to manage the day before. Rather than using blades to swipe the napes of fake titans, they were being shot at with paintballs the size of baseballs. Which as you could imagine, hurt like hell. They had to quickly learn to fully balance themselves through unpredictable weather and events while dodging every single hit. If one cadet was touched even slightly, it would stain their uniform a bright neon color that they couldn’t hide and they were to receive punishment after words. Not only did they have to worry about not falling from the air while dodging painful hits, they had to make it to the end of the forest within ten minutes. Then do it all over again and again for hours.

A giant pink paint ball was heading straight for Jean’s face and he quickly yanked his body to the side. The ODM gear jerked a bit and he nearly lost balance and almost rammed straight into a tree. “Shit!” He grabbed a hold of the gear and found his balance again. “Whoo, that was close. But I’m still better than you, loser!” Jean screamed.

“I’m not competing with you! You’re better! Fine! I just don’t want to die!” a voice answered back.

“Huh?” Jean glanced to the side to see cadet Bertholdt. “The hell? Where’s Eren!? He was just right here.”

“I don’t know! I don’t care!” Bertholdt swung to the right to dodge a paint ball.

“Shit,” Jean clenched his jaw. “Don’t tell me that little twerp made it to the finish line before me!” He raced out of the last part of the forest but failed to have a clean landing and plummeted into a muddy puddle face first.

“Ha!” Valentine said. “Nice one.”

“Shut up!” Jean stood up and swung his arms outward to get the mud off. He glanced around and noticed there was only a few cadets that made it out so far and Eren wasn’t one of them. “He didn’t beat me?” Jean smiled.

“One minute remaining!” drill instructor Thomas screamed through a megaphone.

Jean glanced back toward the forest as more cadets began to make their way out but still didn’t spot Eren. “Agh!” Jean clenched his fists. “C’mon you big idiot.” A few seconds went by and Eren still wasn’t in sight. “Gah damn it,” Jean took a step forward.

“The hell do you think you’re doing cadet Kirstein?!” Thomas yelled.

“Sir. I’m going back in there for a fellow cadet, sir!” Jean answered.

“You will do no such thing, cadet!”

“With all do respect, sir, I am!”

“Cadet—”

Jean flew off into the forest before the drill instructor could finish his sentence.

“You big headed idiot! I can’t believe you’re making me do this!” Jean yelled as he flew to the spot where he saw Eren last. “Eren?!” he screamed out but didn’t hear anything back. He landed on a tree and glanced around. A giant neon yellow paint ball was heading straight for him. “Shit!” He jerked his head to the side and barely missed the hit, yet slipped and fell from the tree. “Ah!” He quickly launched his gear and saved himself from hitting the ground below. He gasped as he spotted Eren upside down a couple yards away. “Eren!” He flew towards him.

“I’m stuck! The damn gear locked up!” Eren yelled.

“Shit, hold on,” Jean attempted to pull on Eren’s gear that was locked into the tree.

“Thirty seconds, you ass wipes!” the drill instructor could be heard screaming.

Eren gasped. “Just go!” He shoved Jean away.

“No! I’m not leaving you here!” Jean pulled on Eren’s gear from the tree and it began to loosen.

“You idiot!” Eren shoved him again. “Don’t lose your spot for me!”

“Oh shut up, I’m not doing this for you!” Jean pulled one last time and Eren’s gear unlocked. It made a zipping sound as it quickly retracted back toward Eren and he shot it off toward another tree. “Go!” Jean yelled and they both took off racing out of the forest.

“Five! Four!” the drill instructor counted down.

“We’re making it out, damn it!” Jean screamed.

“Three! Two!”

Both Jean and Eren flew out from the forest and rolled across the ground a few times.

The drill instructor glanced down at them as he screamed, “One!” He made his way over and glared down at them. “I gave you an order to not go back in there, cadet Kirstein. For your misconduct, you are ordered to a ten mile run after practice!”

Jean stood up and glanced at him with wide eyes. “Ten?!”

The drill instructor walked up to where his boots hit Jean’s. “Do you want to make it fifteen, cadet Kirstein?! Cause I very much can!”

Jean put his head down. “No, sir.”

“That’s what I thought!” The drill instructor turned and walked off. “Everyone get ready for round 45!”

“Sir!” the cadets screamed.

Eren glanced at Jean, who looked like a sad wet dog. “You didn’t have to go back for me. You shouldn’t have.”

“Well it’s done now, isn’t it?” Jean said in a sad tone.

Eren lightly slapped Jean’s shoulder. “Thank you…idiot.”

Jean glanced at him. “No problem…idiot.”

“Go!” Thomas screamed and the cadets took off back into the forest.

///

“Alright then. Fine,” Annie said with crossed arms. “Girls vs boys it is.”

“Ha,” Reiner lifted his sleeves. “Pick your best five to represent your team and let’s get this over with already.”

Annie turned around to face the girls. “Any volunteers?”

“Uh,” Sasha raised her hand. “I’m not volunteering to fight the guys but I just want to say, don’t volunteer unless you can fight because I really really really want some of that steak and sausage and beer so—”

“So are there any actual volunteers?” Annie cut her off as there were more important matters right now. “I myself am going.”

“I’ll go too,” Valentine stepped out in front of everyone.

“Oh, we’re for sure going to win now!” one of the girl cadets screamed.

“I change my mind. I didn’t know she was going to be competing!” a boy said from a few feet away as he stepped back into the boy crowd.

“Ah, c’mon. You can take her!” Reiner said. Valentine rolled her eyes.

“We need three more,” Annie said as she studied their side of the crowd. She glanced at Ava.

“Oh, no way,” Ava nodded her head as she stepped back. “I’m not embarrassed to say that I very truly suck at fighting and will lose!”

Sasha covered her mouth and giggled. “You’re funny! I like you.” She gently shoved Ava’s shoulder with her own.

“Hey Sasha!” Connie yelled from the other side. “If you fight, I’ll compete against you! We’ll finally find out which of us is the stronger half!”

“That’s it,” Sasha stepped out. “You’re on!”

“Woohoo!” the girl side cheered.

“Alright, anyone else?” Annie asked. No one else answered. She sighed and glanced toward Valentine and Sasha. “I guess that means some of us will have to fight twice. I can do two rounds.”

Sasha glanced back and forth between Valentine and Annie. “Ah, c’mon! It can’t be me! You’re stronger anyway!” She shoved Valentine.

“Fine. I’ll double round,” Valentine said.

“Alright then,” Annie said.

“Phew,” Sasha wiped her forehead.

They faced the boys to see that the five lined up consisted of Connie, Eren, Bertholdt, Reiner, and Jean. The crowd began to cheer and throw out names as to who they were rooting for.

“Hey!” Reiner said “You’re supposed to choose five! Do you not know how to count or what?”

“Some of us will be doubling,” Annie said.

“Which of you—”

“You’ll find out eventually.”

The guys nervously glanced at one another.

“Fine, whatever! Double the ass-beat for your team then,” Reiner smirked. “Put your first runner up in the center circle and let’s do this!” The crowd cheered even louder. Annie rolled her eyes and turned to the girls. “Alright, anyone care to go first or should it be me?”

“I’ll go!” Sasha said excitingly. “I really want to get this over with already to be honest.”

“Alright then. Go ahead,” Annie moved to the side and turned back around to face the guys.

“Okay,” Sasha made her way to the circle as she stared back at Annie and Valentine like she was a kid going to her first day of school. “Well aren’t you going to wish me luck or something?”

Valentine sighed. “Goodluck—”

“No,” Annie said at the same time.

“Yay!” Sasha turned around to be faced with 6-foot Bertholdt standing across from her with a giant smirk on his face. “Wh-what?! Wait! I thought I was going against Connie!”

“Change of plans,” Bertholdt said.

“Uhh,” Sasha nervously glanced back. Valentine nodded for her to go ahead.

“Ready, get set,” Reiner said. “Go!” The crowd began to jump and scream.

Sasha turned around to see Bertholdt racing towards her. “Ahh! Don’t hurt me!” she screamed with her arms crossed over her face as she braced for the worst.

Bertholdt tackled her to the ground and there was a “Ohh!” from the crowd. Valentine made an expression like she sort of felt bad for her.

Sasha kicked her feet and arms out. “Okay! You win! Ahh! I’m tapping out!”

“One for the boys!” Reiner screamed and his side cheered.

“Pathetic,” Annie mumbled.

Bertholdt made his way off of Sasha. “That was too easy.”

Sasha struggled to stand and walk back to the girls. “I’m never”—she said through heavy breath as if she did much—“doing that again!”

“Alright, so who’s taking me on now?” Reiner flexed his arms out as he made his way to the circle.

“Oh, please,” Annie rolled her eyes as she walked up. “I’ll be kicking your ass today.”

“Ha! Well I’d like to see you try—”

He was already faced down on the ground before he could even finish his sentence. “Oohh!” the crowd went crazy.

“Agh,” Reiner groaned. “That hurt.”

“I should’ve chose a more competitive opponent,” Annie said as she walked back towards Valentine.

“I didn’t know you could fight like that,” Valentine said amused and impressed. She hardly ever met anyone that fought with skill close to her own.

“Yeah, well,” Annie rolled her sleeves back down as she faced toward the boys. “I don’t go bantering about it to everyone like you.”

“Huh?!”

“Alright, who’s up?!” Reiner screamed as he held the side of his stomach. Valentine and Jean made their way to the circle and everyone cheered.

Jean rolled his sleeves up. “I’ll try to take it easy on you,” he smirked.

Valentine laughed a bit. “Sure.” She put her hands up.

“He’s going to get nuked!” a boy screamed.

“Hey, you’re on my team!” Jean yelled.

“Ready?” Reiner screamed. Jean glared into Valentine’s eyes. “Go!” Reiner screamed and the crowd cheered.

Jean attempted to rush a tackle and leaned down as he grasped his arms around her waist. Valentine pivoted her feet into the dirt and began to push against him.

“Huh?!” Jean’s feet began to push back.

She took one step forward and he lost all of his balance on his feet. He didn’t even know how it happened but all he knew was that his back was against the ground and Valentine was on top of him. The crowd screamed with cheer.

“Too easy,” she shoved him into the ground and pushed herself up.

“How did—” he glanced around confused and noticed Reiner shaking his head with his hand on his face. “Well you try to fight her then!”

“Get up already!” Reiner yelled back.

“Shut up!” Jean stood and walked back embarrassed.

Annie fought Eren and easily won within a second. Valentine fought Connie and it was barely even a fight if anything at all.

“I’m sorry! Please don’t hurt me!” Connie screamed as he dropped to his knees. “You win! You’re stronger! Please!” he desperately tapped his hand on the ground over and over. Valentine gave him a peculiar expression.

“Boo!” The crowd screamed.

“Hey, what the hell is going on in here?” a drill instructor yelled from nearby. Everyone gasped and scattered like ants back to the dorms.

In the end, the girls won the match and got to feast on the stolen meat and beer from the officers pantry.

Eren, Armin, Reiner, Bertholdt, and Connie snuck into the girls dorms to have a secret party with Valentine, Ava, Sasha, and Annie. It had been a year since they joined the scout training program and they figured they deserved some celebration for being among the ones that have passed onto the second and final year of training. Eren managed to steal some very expensive blue rare wine, along with some other alcohol, from the officer’s pantry while Ava and Sasha managed to steal a ton of food.

“Oh-oh! I know! A titan!” Sasha screamed as she jumped up and down and pointed at Connie. He nodded no and tried again at his turn of charades. He was terrible.

“I’m going to get another bottle, do you want one?” Ava slurred as she leaned all the way into Valentine.

Valentine laughed. “Sure, I’ll take one. Are you sure you can make it to the table and back?” she teased.

“Yesssss I’m sure!” Ava stumbled as she tried to stand. Valentine shook her head and moved her attention back to the terrible charades.

“How the hell was that supposed to be drill instructor Thomas?” Reiner yelled out at Connie.

“Hey,” Connie extended his hands outward. “It’s not my fault I’m so good and you guys suck.”

“I’ll go and show you guys how it’s done,” Annie stood up and made her way to the front.

Ava grabbed two bottles and noticed that the door was slightly opened. “Hm?” She walked over to shut it when she realized that someone was standing outside alone. It was Jean. He rested his elbows on the wooden balustrade as his arms hung slightly over with one hand barely holding a grip on his empty bottle. He stared into the few drops that remained at the bottom. She walked up beside him and noticed that his face was wet.

“Hey,” Ava said in her usual soft tone.

Jean nearly jumped as he hadn’t realized that she was standing directly beside him. “Uh,” he wiped his face and sniffed his nose. “Hey,” he said without glancing at her.

“Are you alright?” She placed her warm hand on his cold one. He never knew what it was about Ava but she always gave him a sense of home, even though he was so far from home. “You can talk to me if you need to. No pressure.”

“Yeah,” his voice broke before he could even finish and he began to cry uncontrollably. He covered his face with his other hand embarrassed and began to hyperventilate. She rarely saw Jean cry but she had never seen him this broken before. “I kn-know it’s lame and pathet-ic but,” he struggled to breathe and speak at the same time.

“Here,” Ava placed the two bottles that were in her other hand on the balustrade and pulled Jean in for a hug. She tightly wrapped her arms around his neck and squeezed. Jean completely collapsed into her arms as he rested his chin on her shoulder and wrapped his arms around her. He began to weep now. She could feel his entire body trembling and parts of her shirt getting caught in his clenched fists. “It’s okay, just breathe, okay?” she patted his back.

“You-you’re so nice,” Jean said as he cried. One of his favorite things about Ava was that she never needed to know what exactly was wrong to comfort someone. Even though she had no idea why he was hurting, she just held him.

Ava smiled. “Sometimes.”

This made Jean giggle a bit. After a few moments, he felt himself begin to calm down. “Sorry,” he whispered as he awkwardly broke away from her. He wiped his nose with his sleeve.

“Don’t apologize,” she said. “You don’t have anything to be sorry for…Do you want to talk about it?”

He put his head down as if he was ashamed. “It’s so pathetic,” he said with a light laugh that sounded more broken than cheerful. “But,” he hesitated as his breath became heavier. “I just…really miss my m-mom.” His eyes began to water again and he glanced away toward the wilderness around them. “I was always such an ungrateful asshole. I never appreciate the things she did for me until she wasn’t around anymore”—he wiped his nose again with his sleeve—“not even big things either just little things like…her blueberry pie and the way it smelled the entire house…I miss going down the stairs and hearing her hum to the same song each morning. It used to irritate me,” he laughed. “But I just miss it so much now…I just think this first year of training is really taking its toll on me now.”

“Hey, ya know what?” Ava said as she poked his cheek. He gave a broken smile as he glanced at her. His eyes were still really watery like he was about to break again. “Why don’t you write your mom and ask for the blueberry pie recipe and we can make it here?” Jean’s eyes widened and lit up. “I used to help my mom with baking so I have a bit of experience. I’m sure I can’t perfect it as well as your mom but it may give you a small taste of home in the meantime until we graduate.”

“You”—Jean wiped his face—“would do that?”

“Yeah, why not?” Ava smiled.

“That’s literally the sweetest thing anyone’s ever said to me.”

“Yikes. Sorry for that,” Ava teased.

Jean laughed. “Okay! Let’s do it! I’ll write her and ask for the recipe!” His tone changed into a more excited one.

“Yay!” Ava cheered with her hands up.

Jean put his arms around her and lifted her from the ground. “Thank you! Thank you!”

“Ahh!” Ava yelled. Jean was much taller than Ava so it felt like a giant lifted her from the ground.

He gently placed her back down. “Sorry, I don’t what came over me,” he scratched his head.

Ava laughed. “It’s alright. Do you feel better?”

“Yeah,” he smiled. “I do.” He moved his gaze to his hands. “This is going to sound so weird but…you’re kind of…” he glanced up at her with an awkward expression. “You’re like home to me in some ways.” Ava’s eyes widened a bit. “Not like in a weird way or anything!” he quickly said.

Ava giggled. “It’s not weird.”

“In the least weird way possible,” Jean smiled. “All of you guys are like family to me.” He quickly wiped the smile off of his face as her realized that that sounded even more weird. “Is that a creepy thing to say?”

“No! Of course not,” Ava said. “I feel the same way about all of you. You’re my family.”

Jean smiled from the corner of his mouth. “Don’t tell them I said that though. Especially Eren. That little twerp.”

Ava laughed. “Okay, I won’t tell them. But for the record, they see you as family too. Especially Eren.”

“Really?” Jean was waiting for her to that she was joking.

“Of course. I know you and Eren are constantly lighting a fire under each others asses but he does care about you a lot. He just doesn’t show it the same way that I do.”

“Hm,” Jean rolled his eyes.

“In fact, I think that’s his weird way of showing he likes you.” Ava grabbed the bottles and handed one to Jean.

“I could sure use one of these—” he glanced at Ava with a peculiar expression as she bit her teeth into the cap. “Dude, what are you—”Ava’s cap screwed off and fell to the ground. Jean’s eyes widened. “How did you? But your teeth?”

She grabbed his bottle and did the same thing. “Valentine taught me that trick when we were kids.”

“You guys were drinking when you were kids?!” He grabbed the bottle from Ava. “Sheesh. Your parents must’ve been so cool.”

“They were actually kind of strict. But Valentine and I would sometimes sneak a beer from the fridge and sit in the closet and drink it.”

Jean laughed. “Definitely sounds like something she’d do. But you? I’m surprised.”

Ava smiled. “Me too, to be honest.” Jean laughed again. She held her bottle towards him. “To family.”

“To family,” he repeated as he tapped his bottle on hers.

Eren glanced at Armin and noticed that he was shivering. “Are you cold?” Eren’s words slurred.

“Oh-uh. Yeah, but I’m fine.”

“Here,” Eren unzipped his jacket.

“No-stop that. You need it.”

“We can share.” Eren wrapped one half of his jacket around armin’s shoulder and violently pulled it to where Armin’s body jerked towards him.

“Eren,” Armin said in a soft tone.

“Sorry. Hold on,” Eren slurred. “Let me just…” was all Armin heard before mumbles. He glanced down to see that Eren was rubbing the ends of the zipper strips together and wasn’t even in range of the actual zipper hook.

“Here,” Armin brought his hands out from underneath the bottom edge of the jacket. “I got it.” Eren dropped his hands and sighed like it took all of his energy. Armin gently slid the zipper up until it reached the top. “There.”

Armin turned his attention back to Bertholdt, who was telling some random story to the group, but Armin could barely keep up with the details and quickly became confused. He felt Eren’s stare and turned to him. “Hm?”

Eren’s eyes looked so heavy like he could barely keep them open. He tried to concentrate on Armin’s face and began to slightly sway back and forth. “Do you,” he mumbled.

Armin laughed. “You have dragon breath.” This is what they called it when one drank so much that their breathe smelt of such intense alcohol to where they could ignite a fire if they wanted.

“Like her?” Eren slurred.

“What?” Armin smiled. It was hard to take Eren seriously.

“Do you l-like her?”

Armin gave him a peculiar expression. “Who are you talking about?”

“You know.”

“No, I don’t.”

Eren sighed and drunkenly rolled his eyes. “Reiner told me.”

Armin glanced over at Reiner. Alcohol spilt from the sides of Reiner’s mouth as he gargled down his sixth bottle. “Chug! Chug! Chug!” Bertholdt, Sasha, Connie, and Annie all cheered.

Armin shook his head and moved his gaze back to Eren. “I don’t know what you’re talking about. I think you’re just drunk.”

“Reiner!” Eren screamed so loud and abruptly that it hurt Armin’s right ear. Reiner released a giant burp and slammed his bottle down on the floor.

“Woohoo!” the others cheered.

Reiner turned to Eren. “Huh?”

“Tell Armin!” Eren slurred.

Reiner leaned toward them. “What?” he tried to scream over the loud noise.

“Tell him about the girl!”

“Oh!” Reiner wiped his mouth. “I forgot about her.”

“Who?” Armin asked.

“There’s this girl who’s interested in you. She’s like a major nerd like you too and kept asking me to invite you to her study but I forgot.” Reiner grabbed Armin’s shoulder. “She’s a hot one too, boy, let me tell you.” Armin made a gross and awkward expression.

“Whoever won the last game gets to start this one,” Sasha interrupted.

“I know. That was me, idiot.” Valentine snatched the cards from her.

Reiner turned his attention back to the others. “I won the last match, you liar!”

Armin moved his attention back to Eren, who looked somewhat sad. “I swear, I didn’t know,” Armin said in a soft tone.

Eren mumbled something but Armin couldn’t make out what he said. Then, Eren put his arm around Armin and pulled him closer but was so drunk that he hadn’t realized he pulled him so rough that they head butted one another.

“Ouch,” Armin said as he rubbed his head.

“But if you did,” Eren slurred as he slightly swayed. “You’d tell me, right?”

“Tell you what?”

“If you had a crush on someone.”

“Oh. Yeah, sure.”

Eren leaned into Armin’s face and whispered, “So do you?”

“You’re so drunk.”Armin slightly moved his head back. “And do I what?”

“Do you have a crush on someone?”

Armin’s eyes widened. “W-what?” he laughed nervously. “Why are you asking me that?”

Eren smiled. “Because, I think I know who it is,” he whispered as he stared straight into Armin’s eyes.

“Uh—” Armin jerked his head the other direction. “You do?”

“Yeah.”

Armin was terrified. He felt his stomach nearly fall out of his ass. “Oh,” his voice trembled as he stared away from Eren. “Who, then?”

Eren stayed silent for a long moment. Armin felt his chest tighten as he slowly turned back to face him.

“I’m just joking!” Eren laughed.

“Oh,” Armin laughed nervously but was on the verge of passing out.

“But if you did, you would really tell me, right?” Eren asked.

“Y-yeah.”

Eren rested his head on Armin as he took in a big gulp of his beer. “I think I’m going to puke.”

“Me too.”

///

One year later…

Cadets gathered around a giant bonfire that took place a mile away from the training grounds so they wouldn’t get caught. It was the day before the graduation ceremony and the bonfire was a celebratory tradition.

Armin glanced up at the stars that twinkled in the dark black sky above. He reached his freezing hand for the two laces that dangled from the edge of Eren’s hoodie that he wore. He closed his eyes as he felt the warmth it gave off along with the warmth from the giant bonfire. He smiled and as he opened his eyes, he noticed Eren staring at him. Armin’s eyes widened.

“What?” Eren asked.

“Oh-uh,” Armin became somewhat shy. “I was just thinking of that night when we snuck out of your house…on Ava’s birthday.”

Eren smiled and glanced at the bonfire. “Feels like so long ago. We were just kids then.”

“We finally get to do our long awaited mission,” Ava said as she and Valentine walked up beside Armin.

“Jeez,” Valentine said. “I actually thought I had a chance at getting passed those guards at the gate.” They all laughed. “And now…those gates will be opening up pretty soon for us.”

“I can’t believe it’s actually happening,” Ava said in a more serious tone.

“We finally get to see the world we’ve talked about,” Eren put his arm around Armin and pulled him closer. “Lands of ice,” he moved his bottle outward toward the bonfire as if he could already see it.

“Fiery water,” Ava said.

Armin’s face blushed and he glanced up at Eren. “And the sea,” he said in a soft tone.

Eren glanced at Armin and their noses nearly touched. “What should we do first?”

Armin stared into his eyes and instantly feel felt his face heat up. He could feel Eren’s calm breathing as his chest slowly raised and lowered. He could feel his warm breath brushing against his face. “The s—”

“Sea! I knew you were going to say that!” Eren smiled. “That’s still your favorite.”

Armin smiled. “Yeah. It is.”

“Panel 30 of A World With Titans,” Eren whispered like it was some big secret.

Armin’s eyes slightly widened. “You remember?”

“Of course I remember.”

Valentine smiled from the corner of her mouth as she watched them from the side of her eye.

“I don’t know what all that is about but,” Jean interrupted as he rested his elbow on Eren’s other shoulder.

Armin’s smile quickly faded and he jerked his head away to glance at the bonfire. Eren gave him a peculiar expression.

“All I know is that I’ll have the first titan kill and you can all suck it!” Jean said.

Eren sighed and rolled his eyes. “We’ll see about that, horse face.”

Jean scowled. “Stop calling me that!”

Eren laughed but the smile quickly faded as he became incredibly serious all of a sudden. He dropped his arm from around Armin and turned to face all of them.

“Eh? What’s wrong with you?” Jean asked.

“Can you guys promise me something?” Eren said in a serious tone. They all glanced at one another. “It’s just...we’re graduating now and all of our lives will be very different from this point on. Nothing will ever be the same. Especially after we leave out those gates,” he glanced at the ground. “Just promise me that,” his breath shortened and he struggled to get his words out. “We’ll try our best to all make it out of the scouts alive because…I-I don’t know what I’d without you guys. You’re my f…” he moved his gaze up to them and they could see now that his eyes were slightly watery. “My fam—”

“Yeah!” nearby cadets cheered as Reiner ripped his training jacket off and tossed it into the bonfire.

“Idiot, you need that for tomorrow!” Jean yelled out. Reiner waved his hand out as if to say whatever. Jean moved his attention back to Eren to see his cheeks were deeply flushed now. “Ah!” Jean yelled as he stepped back. “What are you doing? Don’t do that! Stop that!” He pointed to Eren’s face.

“Stop what?!” Eren yelled angrily.

“Stop blushing, you weirdo!” Jean screamed as his own cheeks went pink.

“I’m not! I’m just hot from the bonfire!” Eren yelled.

Ava covered her face and glanced at Valentine and Armin to see that they all had the same blushed cheeks. But it was definitely not from the bonfire.

Eren crossed his arms and glanced to the side. “Don’t make this into a big deal. Just fucking promise me already so we can stop talking about this!” He violently stuck out his pinky.

“You serious?” Jean laughed.

“Hurry up!” Eren yelled.

Jean sighed and rolled his eyes as he and everyone else wrapped their pinkies around Eren’s.

“Promise!” they said at the same time.

#aot #attackontitan #enemiestofriendstolovers #enemiestolovers #levi_ackerman #leviackerman #levifanfiction #leviff #levixoc #levixoriginalcharacter #slowburn #slowbuild

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an-anticlimactic-bass-drop · 3 years

Text

Tall

Prompt: Tech is too tall for his own good. Constantly hitting his head on objects and desks as he works on projects. The other bad batchers make fun of him for this but you find it endearing.

Tech X Reader

Slow Burn/ Angst

Warnings: Mild 1.10 Spoilers

Word Count: 1.5K

Part 1/?

This was 100% inspired by this gif from episode 7 of Tech under the main control desk.

You enter the cockpit of the Havoc Marauder late at night slowly and quietly as you try not to disturb the tall man who is working on the wires under the main panel.

“Tech?” you call softly to him when he doesn’t notice you.

He abruptly sits up hitting his head on the underside of the panel and laying back down quickly with a loud thunk.

“Well that was unpleasant.” he says with a grimace of pain as he leans out from under the panel. You try to not look worried when he rubs his head where he had hit it on the panel.

“Is there something you need?”

“Sorry! I just couldn’t sleep. Figured you were still up here.”

He nods slowly as he leans back down to continue working on the wires.

“Do not mind me. I am upgrading the general security system of the outer walls. The door has been slow to close recently and I am trying to fix the timing. Feel free to sit in here as long as you want. I could use the company.”

He becomes absorbed back into his project as the time passes. Mindlessly chatting about the upgrades he's making and the general gossip of the other men and Omega. It is mostly you gossiping honestly. Tech isn’t the biggest gossip in the world but he listens like every detail you talk about is the most important and interesting information he has ever heard.

“I’m pretty sure Omega thinks we don’t notice when she borrows our blacks to sleep in. I swear every time I turn around I’m missing another shirt out of my basket. I think it must be a comfort thing.” you say with a yawn as you fight back the call of sleep. Tech’s presence is a calming one and you love hearing him talk. He is your favorite of the bad batch and you might have a small crush on him but you would never admit it to him. He is your best friend. Tech nods absently as he pulls another wire from under the panel.

“I have noticed mine disappearing too but I assumed Echo was doing laundry and got them mixed up with Hunter’s again.” he says slowly. His goggled eyes glance towards you with mirth in his eyes at the joke.

“If Echo is confusing your black’s with Hunter’s then he really must be bad at laundry. You have at least 5 inches on him and your blacks are much bigger. At least he doesn’t think they are Wrecker’s.” You chuckle sleepily at the thought.

Tech crawls slowly out from under the panel, making sure not to hit his head again, apparently done with his upgrades. “I think it is time for you to go to sleep,” he says with a small smile in his voice. You don’t complain as he helps you stand and leads you towards the bunks where the rest of the crew is sleeping.

“You need sleep too.” you protest as he turns to go back towards the cockpit. He smiles wryly at your pathetic attempts to chastise his insomniac tendencies. “I will be fine. Someone needs to stand guard until morning.”

You wake up to the sounds of the rest of the Bad Batch moving around and packing up for the rest of the day. Hunter is passing out rations, Wrecker is curling Gonky like a barbell, Echo is slurping what is obviously his 2nd cup of caf of the morning, Omega is still curled up in her little corner with her clone trooper doll and Wrecker’s blacks on looking more like a night tent than a nightgown, and Tech is nowhere to be found but is more than likely in the cockpit still.

“Any caf left?” you ask in Echo’s general direction. He grunts in the direction of the pot that still has ¾ of the brown liquid in it. You pour 2 cups of the precious drink and head towards the cockpit. Tech is absorbed in his datapad and again doesn’t hear you enter. You wait in the doorway and watch the tall man as he scrolls through the information he has been pouring over all night. The smell of the caf fills the cockpit. Tech sniffs the air and turns towards you as a smile appears on his face.

“Is that for me?” he asks hopefully. You hand him the cup you prepared for him just the way he likes it. He smells the cup before he takes a sip. “It is perfect. Thank you.”

You fall into the co-pilot seat with your cup and start to examine the new security system that Tech spent the night working on.

“Looks good to me! Anything I need to know before you all leave for your mission?”

Tech starts explaining the broad strokes of the new system and how the upgrades make it easier to use. You nod along as you listen to the explanation. The men are headed out on another one of Cid’s bounties. This one is on Raxxus? You think.

“Isn’t Raxxus the separatist capital? Why are you all headed there?” you ask slowly, not comprehending.

“A job is a job. We must pay back our debts.” He’s doing the really cute finger thing he does when explaining things.

Your heart melts at the gesture. He doesn’t realize how cute he is sometimes. Tech gives you a strange look as you realize you have been staring at him for a moment too long.

“Hey Tech!” Hunter calls from the back of the ship.

Tech stands up to head back towards the bunks where the other men are gathered around a map of some kind. He hits his head on the top of the doorway as he forgets to duck while walking through it.

“OW”

You stifle a laugh as he rubs his forehead and pushes through to the back of the ship. You can hear Echo making a crack at Tech’s mishap with a light laugh.

“Watch out for the roof Tech. Your head might damage it if you aren’t careful.”

That man is too tall for his own good. He towers over you when you stand next to him and you won’t deny it makes you feel things. You have had a crush on the nerdy clone pretty much since you joined the merry band of deserted clones. You joined in the aftermath of Order 66 with Omega from Kamino. You were her nanny and you gladly went with the clones when the imperials took over. You never quite trusted Palpatine when he was the Supreme Chancellor and you trusted him even less when he turned the clones against the Jedi and declared himself Emperor. The Bad Batch offered you freedom and you seized the opportunity. Shaking off the memories, you make your way back towards the back of the ship. Omega is awake now but is still sitting in her bunk. Her big eyes are blinking away sleep. You help her down and she immediately goes to stand next to the clone she has claimed as her makeshift father. Her nightshirt is almost dragging the ground with how long it is and you chuckle at the sight. Hunter gently pats her hair, mussed from sleep. Echo hands her a ration bar then turns back towards the map. Tech has an angry red mark on his forehead right above his glasses from where he hit the top of the doorway.

“So what is the plan?” You ask as you look over the map. It appears to be a blueprint of the palace on Raxxus. Hunter starts explaining the mission in simple terms so that you can understand. Basically they need to rescue the senator from the Imperial clones. Omega and you are to stay on the ship and protect it from patrolling clones. Omega protests this as you frown at the idea. Hunter shuts down the complaints with a wave of his hand.

“It is safer for you two to stay on the ship than risk losing you to the imperials” He says quietly. “I can’t lose you again.” he says to Omega as he bends down to her level, “This is the best option right now. We don’t know what we are walking into on this planet. We already have 2 at least bounty hunters after you and the last thing we need is the clones to find you too. We still don’t know where Crosshair is or if he is even alive after the last encounter. I can’t lose anymore of you.”

He finishes slowly and turns back to the men gathered around the blueprints scattered on the table as he rises. Hunter nods to the others and they head towards the ramp. You gather Omega up in your arms and head up to the cockpit to watch as the men depart. She is not happy at the thought of being left behind and her big eyes are shining with anger and hurt. You hold her close as you watch the men disappear into the trees with the droid client. I hope they are going to be okay. You think to yourself.

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wroteasongabouther · 4 years

Text

can’t stand to see you lonely: part 1

a/n: oh my god guys it’s finally here!😬 i really hope i didn’t hype myself up too much and that you guys actually like it. overall i just wanted to put out a story that revolved around christmas and this is what i came up with! so without me babbling too much, i hope you enjoy part 1 of my new story and as always any feedback/reblogs are very much appreciated.

and of course, thank you to the lovely jess @arrogantstyles and jill @havethetimeofyourstyles for beta reading this part for me and giving this rusty old writer the help i needed lol

word count: 17k

warnings: mentions of alcohol, some sexual tension, and an over consumption of starbucks holiday drinks.

fic page // let’s chat // cstsyl playlist

“What floor?” Harry asks, eyes stuck on the many buttons in the elevator instead of seeing who had entered the small space with him. He can tell it’s a woman, and they smelt lovely.

“Six please,” her soft voice replies.

Harry looks over his shoulder in what he hopes is a smooth motion to get a quick peek at who was behind that sweet voice. Her eyes were squinting slightly as she smiles at him. She must be my new neighbour, he thinks as he hits the number six button and it lights up before the elevator begins to move. He steps back, standing in the opposite corner of the young woman. Harry assumes that she is maybe a few years younger than him, but one thing he knew for sure was that she was very pretty. He may even say she was stunning. She's all bundled up with a long coat and a thick scarf as he guesses she had just gone out for some shopping, judging by the few large white paper bags hanging off her arm.

“Did you just recently move in?” He questions, catching her eyes switching from gazing at the wall to his own instead.

She smiles again and nods, “yeah.”

“I thought I heard someone move in beside me,” he exclaims. He was certain that someone had moved in beside him. It caused him a bit of a headache hearing all the moving around. And then on top of that, his new neighbour had decided to get right to hammering in on the wall they shared. Little did he know, there was a determined and beautiful girl on the other side.

“Oh you’re my neighbour then?” She says, bringing Harry back from his memory of a few days ago.

“Harry,” he introduces himself, reaching a hand out into the space between them. She switches her Starbucks holiday cup into her other hand in order to shake his. Her hand is warm from holding the drink and it causes Harry's stomach to erupt with little bitty butterflies.

“Y/N,” she says in the same gentle voice as before. He wanted to hear her talk more. There was something about the soft tone of her voice, like he could listen to her speak into the late hours and early mornings and never once get tired of it. He blinks a few times and drops her hand at his intimate thought.

Harry didn't believe in love at first sight per say, but he was known to develop an infatuation of sorts very quickly. A crush as some would call it. Well, to be precise, Mitch teases him the most of his little crushes. There was that one time that Harry fumbled over his words over and over again when they had gone for dinner and had a rather attractive waitress, having asked for her number at the end of the night too. Mitch mocked him for days about it, asking if she had ever texted him back - she didn’t. And Harry didn’t even want to think about the time he spilled an entire blended margarita on his white vans when a certain handsome lifeguard had winked at him during their trip in LA last summer. Mitch still doesn’t let that incident go either.

The elevator doors open, and Harry gives her a smile and motions with a hand for her to walk out before he does. His mom must’ve raised him well, Y/N thinks at her new neighbours mannerisms. First holding the elevator for her, then offering to press the elevator button, and now letting her exit first. Suppose it was just minor things, but growing up in this lovely city that is New York meant she was used to the rudeness of people and sadly the simplest of gestures can make her heart beat just a bit faster in her chest.

“If you uh,” Harry pauses as Y/N stops at her front door but looks back at him as he speaks. Harry slows his steps to keep eye contact with her. “If you ever need anything, don’t feel shy to knock on my door.”

Y/N smiles again, nodding at his offer while she twists her key in the lock and opens her front door. Harry's walking backwards now, just a few steps to that same door he’s saying she can knock on. His eye contact is intense, but addicting, like every word she had to say to him mattered. His eyes are green, just green, nothing crazy and yet she found them very endearing. Would it be cliche of her to say she swore she saw them sparkle?

“I’ll keep that in mind, thank you,” she says and before she can say anything else, she steps into her new apartment and shuts the door behind her.

Y/N finds herself standing there for a moment, remembering every word Harry had spoken to her as she slips out of her shoes. She then remembers his facial features while undoing her coat and hanging it up along with her scarf. The bit of facial hair he was sporting, how it seemed like it may have taken a while to grow so he kept it minimal. Or that little mole by his mouth, she even took note of that in their short time together. He had a cute nose too, she thinks. Harry takes up every inch of space in her mind for over an hour before she’s brought out of whatever dream state fog she was in. She lets out a deep breath and shakes her head a little before going about wrapping the presents she had bought earlier in the day while sipping her Christmas Starbucks drink, falling back in love with the holidays all over again.

“No, no, no, no,” Y/N groans as she twists and turns the knobs for her shower, and yet, nothing happens. Only a few drops fall to the tiled floor causing her to let out another string of curses. “This can not be happening,” she says.

But it was. Y/N’s hair was a mess, beyond greasy and a bit matted from her sleep last night. Not to mention she smelt like sweat from bringing up the box that held her new fake christmas tree this morning. She had been tempted to walk down the hall and knock on Harry's door, but she didn’t want to be annoying and fall into the stereotypes of the helpless young female living on her own for the first time. So instead she grabbed a cable knit sweater, tugged on her old dirty ugg boots, and went down in the elevator to meet with the Amazon delivery person. Little did she know that the box was way too tall for the elevator. So, she ended up bringing it up herself. All six flights of stairs, Y/N pulled and dragged that box up to her floor which caused her to break quite the sweat. Thankfully, it wasn’t so heavy, but she couldn’t help but think that she went through all of this just so she could get her new fake christmas tree up. Freaking fake! Not even a real one because apparently that wasn't allowed at her apartment building. Oh, how she was going to miss the smell of a fresh christmas tree. And oh, how she wanted to get rid of this disgusting smell of sweat she embodied now.

“Why me?” She winces, looking up at the ceiling and letting the glass door for her shower close as she gave up on the water magically appearing.

Is this the most appropriate time to not be shy and knock on Harry's door? Suddenly, her Apple watch vibrates, and she brings her arm up to see the reminder she had set before to tell her of the tight schedule she’s on for the day. With only 45 minutes left to get ready, she needed to get moving quickly. Y/N curses herself for wasting the past fifteen minutes on her phone, reading over her newest Instagram comments and aimlessly scrolling through her feed. So she tugs both sides of her purple robe that she had changed into anticipating a shower in her own home. Y/N pulls it tighter and ties the belt around her waist into a bow, and before she can give it a second thought, she’s out the door of her own apartment and starting down the hallway.

Harry didn’t know when he thought Y/N would eventually knock on his door. A part of Harry was hoping that she would have knocked sooner than a week later. But nonetheless, when there was a frantic knock on his door, he didn’t miss how his heart skips in his chest as he imagined Y/N standing on the other side. Peering through the peephole in his door he saw her standing there - in a bathrobe? Harry's brows pull together in confusion as he unlocks the door and heaves the door open.

“Is your water working?” She asks, her voice sounding as panicked as her knocking had been. But before Harry can answer she starts talking a million miles an minute. “Cause mine’s not, like not a single drop and I need to shower. So badly. And I know it’s probably super weird and rude of me to just bang on your door and ask to use your shower. Honestly, I can’t even believe I am but I am in such a hurry and I have the busiest day ahead of me with work and going to the-”

“Y/N,” Harry cuts her off abruptly. Y/N rolls her lips into her mouth and blinks up at him. “You need to use my shower? Is that what you’re getting at?”

Harry is a bit thrown off, not once did he think she’d come knocking for this reason. He glances down the hall awkwardly. He hopes that that noisy neighbour of theirs across the hall wasn’t peeping into their conversation, or seeing Y/N in this bathrobe. Mr Matthers can be a bit of a creep, Harry thinks. At the thought he hears a creak come from behind the door that’s across the hall.

She nods, “I know it’s like super strange to ask but mine is not working and I don’t have time to figure it out.” When Harry looks back at her, he notices she’s staring down at the ground between them, her eyes blinking rapidly as if she’s realizing what she’s gotten herself into. Harry didn’t want her to feel uncomfortable.

“S’alright, really, come in,” Harry says while opening the door to his apartment wider.

Y/N gives him a smile of appreciation before stepping into his home. The layout of Harry’s apartment is really just the opposite of hers, but the interior design he’s gone with is a lot better.

He’s gone for the classic monochrome look with blacks, white and greys. But with pops of colour where it matters, like a blanket over the back of his large L-shaped couch that looked handmade. She wonders if a family member made it, quite liking the light blues and pinks blended together. He’s got the same hardwood flooring like her own apartment and the plain off white paint on the walls - but with a few very unique paintings hung up on them. There’s two tall shelves, full of vinyls and novels and some picture frames too, that are on either side of his large flat screen tv which he took the time to hook up on the wall. It’s got a TV show paused on the screen, in her quick glance she can’t tell what show he was watching before she knocked but it looked like a cooking show. The corners of her lips twitch up into a smile at the thought of Harry being into cooking or baking maybe. He’s got a matching chair to his couch in the living room too that looks like she could fall asleep in it within a second. Overall it simply seems more grown up than her apartment - more put together and clean, that’s for sure.

To give her some credit, she has just moved in while she’s sure Harry’s been here for a while. Harry steps away from the door after locking it again, taking a few steps in order to be in her line of sight. With an arm thrown up, finger pointing down the hall, he gives Y/N another smile. He can’t help it, she looks rather adorable in that purple bathrobe. Was that all she was wearing? He thought to himself. He clears his throat as his mind goes on to imagine what’s under that plush purple material she’s wearing.

“Bathroom’s the first on the left,” he states, “did you bring your own soap or anything?”

“Honestly, no, I just kind of ran out of my place in quite a hurry and didn’t think twice as I got the sudden nerve to come over here.”

“Well, lucky for you I care about hair care, so there’s some good shampoos and even a nice hair oil to put into your hair afterwards when it’s damp. It’s in a small clear bottle with a white and gold label, by my toothbrush,” Harry explains. Y/N nods and starts towards the bathroom. With each step further into Harry’s home, she realizes what exactly she’s done. She can’t believe it really - just asking a complete stranger to let her shower in their home. She could be a murderer for all Harry knew, and he just opened his home up so freely. She steps into the bathroom, switching on the lights and the fan, she shuts the door and sighs. Lifting her arm up her Apple watch lights up to show the time. She had twenty minutes tops to shower, that’s all.

The bathroom is clean, very clean actually. Y/N lets her gaze wander around the space for a moment. There’s matching hand towels and all his skin and hair care are placed neatly on the small counter space too. She assumes he’s a bit of a neat freak. Turning to the shower, she opens the glass door gently and instantly reaches for the silver knobs. As she turns them water falls from the showerhead above her.

“Thank God,” she whispers while looking up at the water.

Y/N adjusts it to her preferred temperature and then she works on untying the knot of her robe. Words can’t describe how grateful she is that it held together in front of Harry. Him seeing her in the robe and with her hair in the state it’s in is embarrassing enough. Honestly, she can’t believe she even knocked on his door in it, and without any clothes to change into afterwards too. Stupid, she thinks while opening the glass door once more and stepping into the shower.

As Harry had said, there’s many bottles littering the built in shelves of the shower. Her fingers lazily turn the bottles so the labels face her. They’re all scented lavender of some sorts, helping with curly hair and volume. Well that explains why his hair looks so lovely, Y/N thinks as she opens a bottle of shampoo and squeezes it till a good amount falls into her other hand. As she hums ‘Have Yourself A Merry Little Christmas’ she lathers up her hair and massages her scalp. Rinsing it out after and then doing the same with the conditioner. While she lets the conditioner sit in her hair she scans the few other bottles on the shelves for a body wash. She didn’t want to come out of the shower smelling like a pre-teen boy, but she also did not want to smell like sweat. Goats milk and lavender infused, Y/N reads the label of what looks to do a locally owned product. She can’t help but smile as she reaches for it and pours some into her hands before rubbing it over her skin. There’s something so sweet knowing that Harry supports local businesses. He really doesn’t seem like the guys that Y/N is used to.

Three sharp knocks on the door startle Y/N, bringing her out of her day dreams. She quickly brings her arms up to her chest, trying to save herself some modesty if Harry did walk in. Because of course she didn’t think to lock the door. God, what if Harry is a murderer? Y/N thinks. She doesn’t know him, he could very well walk in here with a large kitchen knife and stab her multiple times in the chest while the water begins to run red and she dies right here all because she thought his dimpled smile and green eyes were enduring. Didn’t she learn anything from the whole Ted Bundy thing? Hello, hot guy doesn’t immediately mean nice!

“Y/N?” Harry calls out from the other side of the door, raising his voice just slightly so she could hear it over the running water. She shakes her head from her ridiculous thought - no more Criminal Minds at night for her, she takes the quick mental note.

“Yes?” She responds.

“I just realized I didn’t give you a towel,” he says, his voice sounding strained as he closes his eyes and tries to not imagine his neighbour naked in his shower. Harry’s fist tightens around the towel as his mind ignores him and thinks of how the water is dripping down her skin.

“Oh, yeah,” she breathes out. Looking around the bathroom beyond the foggy glass. There weren't any towels that she could see. Maybe they were under the sink.

“So I uh, I grabbed one for you. I can just open the door really fast and drop it in, I wouldn’t look in I swear, I’d face the hallway and just reach through,” he clarifies, “wait, you locked the door didn’t you?”

“Actually, I didn’t,” Y/N says, “so yeah just drop it in, please and thank you,”

Harry nods, regardless of the fact Y/N can’t see him. He takes a deep breath before turning the doorknob and opening the door just a crack. The towel doesn’t quite fit through, so he opens it a bit more. His eyes are on the towel as he makes sure it gets into the bathroom. He notices the steam pillowing in the small space and just before he looks the other way, he sees Y/N’s purple bathrobe on the floor. Only her purple bathrobe. Harry swallows and drops the towel to the floor and quickly shuts the door again. Y/N jumps at the sudden slam of the door, her heart having been beating out of her chest as she stood under the warm stream of water and listened to Harry deliver the towel.

He spins around and walks away from the bathroom in a brisk walk, making it to his kitchen in record time. He takes a few breaths and blinks at the view from his kitchen window above the sink. It’s beginning to snow. Something tells him this will excite Y/N - just a feeling he has. He hardly knows the girl and he’s been conjuring up versions of her in his head these past seven days. He’d heard her play music through the walls Tuesday night, he recognized the artist after a few moments. Van Morrison, one of his favourites. What were the odds? He had thought. But then he quickly shut that thought down because many people liked Van Morrison, and just because his very cute neighbour liked the same music he did, that didn’t mean she was meant for him.

Then on Thursday in the middle of the day he had seen her running across the street from his apartment. One thing he loved about his apartment facing the front of the building is how he got to see people coming and going. That day it looked as though she was carrying a take out bag from his favourite restaurant. Again, what were the odds that she liked the same place? But again, he had another hard conversation with himself saying that it was a rather popular place in this area and lots of people liked to go there. Y/N was still a stranger to him. A naked and attractive stranger who was in his bathroom right now.

Harry breathes in deeply and leans both hands at either side of his sink as he watches the large snowflakes fall over New York City. He still couldn’t believe he lived here sometimes. Having grown up in a rather small town in Northern England, where the most exciting thing was the bakery he used to work in as a young teen or maybe the fun graffiti on some of the walls downtown, living in NYC always seemed a bit unrealistic to think of. But this was always a dream of his. To be in one of the biggest cities in the United States and doing what he loved the most.

“It’s snowing?” Y/N’s voice full of irritation catches Harry off guard. He turns around to see her standing in the threshold between his kitchen and living room. That purple robe, which would be making an appearance in his dreams he’s sure of, is back on her now clean body while the towel he had given her is wrapped around her hair atop of her head.

“You don’t like the snow?” Harry questions, both of his brows raised high at how off he was about his instinct of her loving the snow.

“No, I mean, yes I do,” she shakes her head slightly, “I just don't like driving it in. New York drivers already freaking suck and the moment snow starts falling it’s like they forget how to drive altogether.” Y/N explains, crossing her arms at her chest.

“It’s the same in London, nearly got into a few accidents in my early years of driving thanks to it,” Harry reveals. Y/N smiles at the knowledge about himself he had let slip, regardless of how irrelevant it is.

“Anyways,” she sighs, “thank you for letting me barge in here and use your shower.”

“It’s no problem, really,” Harry assures her.

“No seriously, you saved me a lot of trouble.”

Harry’s chest swells at her words, mirroring her smile as he stuffs his hands into the front pocket of his trousers and leans back against the edge of the counter. Y/N takes this time to look over Harry’s outfit. He’s got on a cream collared ribbed t-shirt, a beaded necklace adorning his neck, a pair of brown pants that flare out and nearly hid his white sock covered feet. He doesn't dress like the men Y/N sees day to day. It's different, kind of old school, but she likes it. Suits him, she thinks, despite the fact that she barely knows him.

“You’ve got to drive somewhere?” Harry questions, unsure if he’s prying.

“Yeah, JFK unfortunately,” she frowns.

“That’s going to be a nightmare,” Harry says.

“Thanks for the reminder, yeah,” Y/N teases him while fighting back the smile pulling at her mouth.

“Sorry, I just meant that it’s sort of a long drive and airport terminals are a pain, that's all.”

“I’m just bugging you. It most definitely is going to be a nightmare,” Y/N agrees with a chuckle, “and I’m going to be late if I don’t hurry.” She adds while jabbing a thumb over her shoulder in the direction of her own apartment. Harry nods and notices how her robe’s a bit looser than before as she drops her arms and it falls a few inches down her shoulder - exposing more of her soft looking skin. Harry has to look away and walk towards his front door with Y/N before his imagination gets the best of him.

Harry unlocks the door and holds it open for Y/N to walk out of his home. He liked having her in his space. Harry internally curses himself for yet another intimate thought about his neighbour fogs up his mind. Just as she steps over the threshold of his apartment, Y/N spins on her heels quickly and reaches up with both hands to grab the twisted up towel around her hair. Harry nearly comes undone right then and there. The sight of her wet hair falling down effortlessly around her freshly washed face causes Harry’s mouth to feel dry suddenly. But as she makes the move to reach up, pulling it off of her head, and then holding out the towel in front of her, all of this causes her robe to fall even more off of her shoulders. Now both of her shoulders were fully exposed for him to see. Which Y/N notices right away and blushes, rushing to try and readjust herself, then only holding the towel with one hand while she bares her other arm over her chest to keep the robe from falling open completely.

“Nearly stole your towel,” Y/N breathes out.

She’s distracted by how her robe is slipping apart and how Harry’s eyes are falling with it. Harry clears his throat and takes the towel from her, giving her a chance to fix her robe, and he leans against his door for support as his head spins from the scene he has played out in his head. Her robe falling apart, seeing the swell of her breasts, how her nipples must look. He imagines they’re hard from the chill in the hallway, pebbling into little buds. Then he’s imagining how he’d pull her back into his apartment, kissing and touching all over her skin till she’s left breathless and begging for more.

“Thanks,” Harry says and drops his arm to hold the towel down at his side.

“I owe you one,” Y/N states, “for letting me use the shower,” she adds. She’s not sure what else he would think she’s talking about, but she just felt the need to clarify. And she really needed to get back to her own apartment and finish getting ready. “See you around, Harry,” she says with a smile before walking away and hurrying into her home.

Harry thinks of how he should've wished her a safe flight, or even said goodbye. But instead he heard her door shut and followed suit by closing his own. Harry walks into his living room - discarding the towel on the back of his large arm chair, before moving his acoustic guitar from where it was laying on his couch and taking a seat. He then reaches for his cell phone that was left on the coffee table. Opening his contact, he finds the building's maintenance number and calls them.

“Hey Phil, how are you doing?... Good, I’m good yeah, uh, I’m just calling because the water in 602 isn’t working...Yeah Y/N, she actually had to leave in a bit of a rush, so I just wanted to make sure someone got in there as soon as possible to check it out,” Harry explains the situation to the building’s head maintenance man. “I’m not entirely sure when she’ll be back home, maybe you could give her a quick call and double check... Just being a friendly neighbour, Phil… Thanks Phil, have a good day and say hi to Georgia and the kids for me… Bye.”

Harry hangs up the phone and sets it back down onto the table, looking at the open notebook beside it. He hadn’t written anything all morning. Just had a few good cords stuck in his head. Harry picks up the guitar once more and plays the cords.

“Tangled wet hair, soft silk skin, looking so good it should be a sin,” Harry sings softly. It’s not his best and it’s not even that good, if he’s honest with himself. But it seems that Y/N sparked some inspiration inside of him. He grabs his pen, and starts scribbling down the words that now flow through his mind. Finishing with writing ‘Plush Purple Robe’ in capital letters before dropping the pen and going back to strumming the guitar.

He wrote nearly an entire song, thanks to how Y/N looked in that damn bathrobe standing in his apartment, and he just knew this would result in some teasing words from his friends when he brought it into their studio session next week.

Y/N was tired and her third Starbucks of the day wasn’t helping her out at all. She brings a hand up to cover yet another yawn that escapes her. Her eyes feel heavy, drooping as she blinks slowly a few times at her screen. She feels as though she might doze off if it wasn’t for the loud bang of the mail cart smacking against the elevator doors signalling it’s arrival for the day. It jolts her upright once again and she takes another big gulp of coffee, and sends a prayer up above, before she begins clicking away again at her laptop trying to finalize her schedule for the upcoming month of December.

Fittings, photoshoots, buyers meetings, and more fittings, there was rarely any free time in the first two weeks of the month. But thankfully her boss isn’t a complete Grinch and gave her minimal work during the last two weeks. Plus Y/N really did love her job. She lived for the magic world of fashion. The way her bustling office just meant that the designer’s creations were coming to life as A list celebrities and New York's elite fell in love with the pieces she’s gone through lengths to get for them.

She also loved Christmas just as much, if not more, as her job. Even thinking about everything she was looking forward to this holiday season made her feel all giddy inside now. Growing up in the city meant she knew the thrill of skating in Central Park and seeing the Rockefeller Christmas tree being lit up. Her smile was as bright as the lights. She loved going to the annual Christmas markets that were held; walking around with hot chocolate in her hands as she browsed the many homemade soaps and ornaments, and even clothing too. Y/N even enjoyed shopping at the Macy’s down the street and gasping at their holiday displays, and found herself buying a few too many decorations for her home while there. Over the past few days - with any free time she had off work - she had gone into full blown decorating mode in her apartment. It was like Santa’s village and it filled her with so much joy as she set everything into its rightful place in her new home, smiling from ear to ear at the twinkling lights and tinsel lining the perimeter of every room.

“Earth to Y/N,” her co-worker, Sammy, sings while leaning back in his desk chair to try and make eye contact with her.

“Sorry,” she mumbles, zoning back into reality and turning her own chair away from her desk that was up against the large floor to ceiling windows.

“Daydreaming about that hot new neighbour of yours?” Sammy teases her with a smug look on his face. Y/N rolls her eyes and crosses her arms over her chest.

“No, I was not,” she says, “I’m regretting telling you about him already,” she adds. Sammy returns the eye roll.

“There’s no shame in having some eye candy as a neighbour you know,”

“Yeah there is when-“

“Y/N!” Her name suddenly being yelled across the room cuts her sentence off and makes Sammy and herself look over to where it came from. They both see their boss, Amanda, standing in the doorway of her office with both hands up in the air and a look of annoyance across her face. Y/N’s watch vibrates just on time to remind her of her meeting with Amanda. She’s always at least five minutes early; suppose daydreaming about the holidays - not her hot new neighbour - had put her behind schedule a bit.

“Better not keep her waiting,” Sammy says as he rolls his chair back over to his own desk while Y/N closes her laptop, taking it and a notebook with her quickly before slipping her feet back into her black heels. She always took them off when she sat at her desk to give her poor feet a break. As she broke into a speed walk across the office space, nearly avoiding the mail cart, she internally went over what today's meeting entailed.

“Sorry Amanda,” Y/N apologizes as she steps into the office, closing the glass door behind her quietly.

“It’s alright, you’re rarely even a few minutes behind that schedule of yours, so I was more surprised than anything,” Amanda states as she smooths her dress out and takes a seat at her desk. Y/N takes a seat in the chair across her desk, setting her laptop on her lap and then the notebook on top of it while she keeps her favourite pen in hand. It had a cheesy Christmas sweater snowflake pattern on it, which Y/N had bought a whole set for her and Sammy at Target last week.

“I wanted to quickly talk about your time with Miss Woods a couple days ago,” Amanda says, referring to one of the clients from North Carolina that had visited recently. “She said you showed her great hospitality and were a true New Yorker in her eyes, her words exactly.” Amanda gives Y/N a proud smile. “So, great job. She ended up purchasing those Gucci purses we had bought in hopes she’d like them even though she didn't ask for them. All thanks to you putting her in such a good mood, really.”

“Well she was a blast to be around, age really didn't slow her down,” Y/N and Amanda share a laugh. “She turned up my radio every time we got in my car, ordered doubles at dinner and brunch, and even talked about boy issues with me. It was a great time,” Y/N explains while adjusting herself in her seat and crossing a leg over the other casually.

“I think it’s your energy. Your love for this city can be infectious sometimes Y/N,” Amanda says. Y/N’s lips pull up into a smile at her words, they made her feel warm inside.

“Thank you,” she says softly with a nod.

“Now, onto what’s happening over this next week, let’s see how our schedules look,” Amanda starts as she opens her large planner than was always either on her desk or brought home in her large Louis Vuitton purse.

“I got an email from the lovely Mrs. Archibald this morning,” Y/N states. Amanda shakes her head as her face twists up at the mention of one of their bigger clients who happens to be married to the richest man in New York City. It’s just too bad she’s a real bitch sometimes because her attitude could make doing their job a bit harder at times. But Amanda and Y/N loved a challenge, and Mrs Archibald was just that. “She has a last minute dinner party tomorrow and she needs the newest item from Gucci that we can find immediately,” Y/N explains.

“Shit, our new stuff from Gucci doesn’t come in till next Monday,” Amanda curses, eyes roaming around her desk as if the answer to her problem would pop up somewhere.

“I know, which is why I went ahead and called Greg at the store on Fifth and Fiftieth, he said they just got a handful of exclusive holiday pieces early and would gladly have one of us pick a couple items up for Mrs Archibald,” Y/N says. Amanda’s sour look fades instantly and is replaced with a wide smile.

“What would I do without you, honestly!” Amanda exclaims. “Head over to Gucci after lunch today, and then we’ll get Mrs Archibald in first thing tomorrow.”

“Will do,” Y/N says while jotting down her after lunch plans onto a blank page in her notebook.

“How’s your influencer work going for you?” Amanda asks, her eyes on her planner in front of her instead.

“It’s been good, getting closer to five hundred thousand every day. I think the holidays will push me over the mark soon enough,” Y/N states.

“Great, make sure you’re getting close up shots of the dresses Greg shows you. Tease the people of what an exclusive holiday gown looks like,” Amanda suggests. Y/N smiles and jots down the note.

Having an audience was never the goal for Y/N. In fact, she thought of suspending her Instagram account all together once she got the promotion at work. She was worried that it would cause a conflict of interest, but Amanda and the rest of the team saw it as a plus. Having so many people follow Y/N’s life, being interested in what she’s interested in, wanting to get their hands on what she had, all lead to good publicity for the company. It even got them a few A list celebrities because of her account as they saw the company’s name in her bio, which led to contacting the company about setting some fittings up.

And with that set up, they settle into the rest of their itinerary for the week, making note of who needed to be involved with what, and who would be coming into their offices. Jennifer freaking Aniston was scheduled for a fitting this Friday and Y/N was praying she made it back from picking up an order of Louis Vuitton scarfs in time to see her in her custom grown that their team's seamstresses had been working tirelessly on with Prada’s team.

By the end of her and Amanda’s meeting, it was time for lunch. Sammy was waiting by her desk with his black Gucci backpack in hand that Y/N was sure held a Kardashian sized salad. Y/N was glad she meal-prepped teriyaki chicken and rice, so she didn’t have to eat yet another salad seeing as Sammy had gotten her into the over sized salad eating last month; she’s had enough of it.

“I’ve gotta head over to Gucci on Fifth Ave after,” Y/N states with a smile as her and Sammy walk into the conference room that they used for lunch sometimes, shielding themselves away from work a bit - even if the walls were glass and they could still see everyone working around them.

“Lucky bitch,” Sammy grumbles, “Greg always hooks you up with some free pieces when you go there, I swear.”

“Hey it’s only been a few items, nothing crazy,” Y/N defends herself before taking a bite of her lunch.

“Oh I’m sorry, two rings and a pair of tights are nothing crazy? Every other influencer would kill someone for those tights. Firstly, they’re so cute. And secondly, those rings cost my monthly rent.”

“I’m not complaining about any work perks. Maybe you could come with and get to know Greg a bit and get your own ring or two?”

Sammy chews his mouth full of salad, “no thanks, it’s so freaking cold out there. I’ll stay inside where it’s warm,” he says.

“Then don’t complain when I get another pair of tights and you don’t,” Y/N scowls playfully.

“I’d look so much better in those tights, you can’t even deny it,” Sammy says and pokes his fork at Y/N. She raises her hands up in surrender.

“Oh I wouldn’t dare to deny it, ever,” she smiles. They eat a few bites in silence. Y/N starts to feel a bit more energized by the protein she’s eating, thankfully. She now had a long journey to the Gucci store and back as well as a ton of emails to filter through too - which she’s sure will follow her home till the late hours of the night.

“What are you planning to wear for the Christmas office party?” Sammy chimes in, his eyes still on his phone.

“I don’t even know,” Y/N sighs and brings up her Pinterest app on her phone. “I found this outfit and am dying over it every day but I really should just find something in my closet and restyle it, I'm getting more broke by the day.”

“Blame your excessive christmas shopping habits,” Sammy deadpans while glancing at her phone screen.

“I’m aware of why I'm broke, thank you,” she deadpans back, narrowing her eyes at him. “Maybe Greg will have it in his heart to lend me a special piece for the party,” Y/N taunts Sammy with a smile on her face.

“Shut up,” he groans. Y/N laughs and is just about to shut her phone screen off when a phone call comes through from her apartment building maintenance.

“Hello?” She answers. “Hi Phil… Oh that’s awesome news thank you so much for getting it fixed so soon… Yes, I’m glad Harry called in about it right away too…” Y/N notices how her friend's eyebrows fly up at the mention of Harry’s name. “Lovely, thanks again Phil… Have a great day… Bye,” she hangs up the phone and sets it on the table in front of her.

“What did Harry do now?” Sammy questions without a second to spare. Y/N rolls her eyes, but can’t stop herself as she smiles.

“He called in about the water in my apartment like right after I made a mad dash out of his place to go pick up Mrs Woods in time. I hadn't even thought of calling about it and then I got a call on my way to the airport from the head maintenance guy saying Harry told him about it and asked for verbal permission to enter my apartment while I was out,” Y/N explains to him. She was still shocked by Harry’s kindness. Not only did he offer his shower to her, but he then got hers check out that same day. She probably wouldn't have called about it till the next day, if she was lucky to have any free time to stop by her house between entertaining Mrs Woods.

“What a neighbourly thing to do,” Sammy says smugly.

“Shut up, he’s just a nice guy.”

“Mhmm,” Sammy hums while stabbing his salad again for another bite.

The two of them continue to enjoy their lunch break and catch up on what’s been going on in the office. Their fellow associate Kate was trying to sleep with the mail cart boy. He seems freshly twenty one, if that. Just seven years younger than Kate, but she’s a well known cougar - it’s been a thing for, like, two years now. And Julianne was sick again, for the third time in two months. That was the extent of the office drama, sadly. Y/N packs up her bag with her left over lunch, notebook, and laptop before heading back to her desk with Sammy to get her coat and bundle up to brace the cold weather.

At least it wasn’t snowing.

The snow is coming down like a blizzard, making it hard for Harry to see in front of him. It was a colder day, his weather app had called for cloudy skies and a chance of some light flurries - but that all changed in a split second and had Harry racing home from the coffee shop a few blocks away. He’s just praying his notebook full of new song ideas, based off his people watching this afternoon that’s now in his tote bag, doesn't get wet in the short trip he has to walk. Just as he’s about to turn left down the last block till his building, he sees a young woman struggling to walk along the sidewalk in her heels just in front of him. She’s carrying a large beige garment bag, having it folded over her arm as she tries to maneuver around the busy sidewalk and everyone is rushing to get out of the storm. Harry’s just behind her now, that’s when he recognizes the jacket and scarf.

“Y/N?” Harry says, trying to not startle her. But of course, as Y/N turns around to look behind her at whoever had just called out her name on the busy streets of New York, she slips.

“Oh my god!” She squeals, trying to keep the garment bag up so it doesn’t damage the dresses inside, but that means she doesn’t have any hands to throw out to catch herself. Harry sees her begin to fall and reaches out without hesitation. “The bag,” she says, trying to get Harry’s attention to saving the garment bag rather than her. But of course he manages to wrap his arms under hers and hold her upright, standing straight to get her back on her feet once more.

“Shit, I’m sorry, shouldn’t have scared you like that,” Harry says.

Y/N squints at him through the thick snowflakes, he’s standing so close though that she doesn’t have troubles staring into his enchanting eyes. She smiles, adjusting the dresses and her bag before motioning to their apartment building only a couple blocks away. “Let’s get out of this snow storm,” she suggests.

“Right,” Harry agrees and lets her start the walk - that way he can stick close behind in case those death heels of hers cause her to slip again.

Y/N regrets her decision of wearing heels so much right now. She’s sure her cheeks are still red from embarrassment of nearly falling on her ass in front of so many people. Harry’s seen in her purple bathrobe, which is already embarrassing, but falling in heels in this snow storm would’ve only added to her list of making a fool of herself in front of him.

When she arrived at Gucci it was just cloudy, but then after nearly two hours inside the store - mostly chatting with Greg and his associates, she walked outside into the blizzard. Her office was too far of a walk, she knew getting a cab or an Uber during the storm would just be a nightmare and she didn’t want to wait around. There was no way she was going to risk taking the subway while carrying the garment bag that said Gucci right on it and have some lowlife steal thousands of dollars of designer clothes from her. So, she went with the most obvious option of getting these pieces out of the snow storm and headed to her apartment building that was only a few blocks away, thankfully.

“Thanks for saving me back there,” Y/N says with a sigh as Harry uses his key to let them into the building. They both brush the snow off themselves as they walk across the lobby and to the elevator. “I would've been dead if this fell into a puddle or something,” she states while lifting the garment bag.

“Does that say Gucci?” Harry asks, eyebrows raised as he looks at the label on the bag.

“Yeah, I just had to pick up a few things for work,” Y/N explains vaguely. Harry has followed Gucci on Instagram for years, he loves their pieces and finds what they make to be so wonderful. He wishes he had the money to spend on a shopping trip there and yet here is his neighbour - who he may or may not be crushing on - with a large garment bag with Gucci items inside. “I can’t even imagine what Mrs Archibald would've done if I messed these up, god she'd have a fit,” Y/N says with a chuckle, looking at the floors lighting up as the elevator moved.

“Your boss?” Harry questions.

“No, a client, super rich and super bitchy,” Y/N answers, emphasizing both times she says super to really get her point across. She moves the garment bag from one arm to the other, leaning back against the elevator wall.

“Client? What kind of work do you do?” Harry tries to ask casually, not trying to seem creepy or invading in any way.

Y/N smiles, “I’m a part of the, oh so lovely, fashion industry.”

“You don’t like it?” Harry questions, eyebrows furrowed together.

“No, I do,” she corrects him.

The elevator opens then, Harry motions for Y/N to exit first as he had before. She smiles and walks down the hall to her apartment. Just as she fishes her keys from her coat pocket she turns back and looks at Harry when he walks past her. “I owe you, again, for saving my ass, literally from falling,” she says. Harry stops walking and looks at her, she smiles and tilts her head to the side. “And for calling the maintenance guy for the issues with my water,” she adds. Seems Phil spilled the beans, Harry thinks.

“I um, I wasn’t sure how long your trip was, and I just thought it’d be the nice thing to do by making sure they could get it fixed as soon as they could,” Harry explains.

“I actually didn’t go on a trip, I just had to pick someone up from the airport. But regardless it was very nice to know you thought of it for me. So thank you, I owe you, Harry,” she says again, giving him yet another one of her dreamy smiles. Harry’s heart did a little pitter patter in his chest as he looked over her face, taking in how her wispy hairs were wet from the snow that had melted on her head and how her eyes seemed to sparkle under the dim lighting of the hallway. But her lips, he’s been imagining those lips for two days now. Along with that purple bathrobe being on his floor again - his bedroom instead of the bathroom though.

“How about dinner?” Harry blurts out. Y/N had turned back to her door, having it unlocked and open as he had fallen into one of his daydreams about her. She pauses mid step and looks back at where he had stood still, her eyebrows are furrowed together as she thinks he misheard him. Oh shit, abort! Abort! Backtrack and say nevermind before she flat out rejects you, Harry thinks while he waits for her response.

“I, uh, I,” Y/N stops her stuttering and closing her eyes for a moment. She lets out a sigh and opens her eyes again to meet his nervous stare. “I have to hang this up, and change these shoes first,” she says.

“Of course,” Harry nods.

Y/N ponders over it for a moment before coming to the realization that the weather outside was truly frightful and they shouldn’t go out anywhere. “Honestly we shouldn’t go back out there. What if I just ordered something in and you came over? You like pizza?”

“Love it,” Harry smiles. Y/N nods and opens her door further, stepping in to survey the state of her apartment. It’s not messy, thank God. She had time this morning to put away her clean laundry that had taken up her couch over the past few days. There’s a couple hoodies draped over the back of the couch though, a half full glass of water on the coffee table and her kitchen has a pile of dirty dishes beside the sink that she hadn’t gotten to putting in the dishwasher yet. She quickly bends down to put away the few pairs of shoes that were kicked off in whatever direction they went, and turns on the two light switches by the door to light up her living room and hallway.

“Well, come on in,” she says as she turns back to Harry. He smiles as she lets out a deep breath and opens her front door for him.

He should’ve guessed that it would look like Santa had thrown up in her apartment. It was traditional, which Harry loved opposed to the new all white or all gold themes some people went with, but there was a lot of it. A red and green checkered throw blanket over the back of her grey couch, a decent sized tree filled with lights and tinsel and ornaments that all matched, a family of snowmen in one corner of her living room, and many little vintage looking nicknacks along her tv stand, and few shelves around the space. Not to mention the priceless looking tiny christmas village that was set up on top of the desk by her front door, fake snow laid on top to really pull it all together. So much Christmas, and he was only looking in one room. He imagined this festive feeling went throughout her entire home.

“It kind of seems like a lot whenever someone new sees all of my Christmas crap,” Y/N says, breaking Harry’s stare away from her living room and back to her now. She had hung up the Gucci bag on the closet door to her left, and had slipped out of her shoes and was now undoing the buttons of her coat. Her eyes are on the decorations around them though, looking unsure as she takes it all in.

“It’s lovely, honestly, not crap at all,” Harry assures her. Y/N turns back to look at him and mirrors his smile.

“I just have a big soft spot for the holidays, I can’t help myself from buying four Christmas themed throw pillows if they make me feel all warm inside,” she explains, motioning to the couch that did in fact have four pillows on it.

“If it makes you happy, you don’t have to have any reason for buying ‘em.”

“I suppose so,” Y/N hums, finally taking off her coat and hanging it up.

Harry quickly takes his off too as she reaches for it, to hang it beside hers. He gives her a small thanks and then takes his shoes off, setting them beside hers . Y/N has walked into the threshold to the left that led to her kitchen. He notices the tinsel hanging from the beam and smiles before taking a quick peek into her kitchen. As he guessed, it’s all decked out in Christmas stuff too. Towels and nicknacks that seem to replace everyday things like salt and pepper shakers and her soap dispenser that was spaced like a snowman.

“I’ll order a pizza right away. Hopefully this weather won’t slow them down. Have you ever eaten at Sal’s down the street?” Y/N questions.

“Tons,” Harry says. He leans against the threshold to the kitchen and watches as Y/N sets her purse on her small kitchen table and fishes through it for her cell phone. She’s got this crease between her brows as she can’t seem to find it, but it instantly goes away and is replaced with a smile as the iPhone is in her hands.

“Do you like anything on your pizza?” She asks, eyes on her phone screen and she brings up the menu. She typically just gets a cheese, sometimes spices it up with a vegetarian pizza cause she likes the green peppers and red onions.

“I’m actually a vegetarian,” Harry states. “Well, I eat fish on occasion so I guess I’m a pescetarian.”

“Oh cool,” Y/N says, looking up to see Harry’s watching her from the space between her kitchen and living room. The way he’s leaning against the small space of wall, arms crossed at his chest and head tilted to the side - he looks good. He’s dressed in a pair of beige trousers, straight and baggy as his last ones were too, and has a white tank top tucked into the waistband while he layered with a fun patterned button up shirt. She can’t quite make out what is printed on the shirt, but the little squares seem to each have a picture in them.

“Where did you get that shirt?” Y/N can’t stop herself from asking, the fashion lover in her wanting to know.

Harry glances down at the short sleeved shirt on his body, then shrugs, “I think I thrifted it back home in England a few years back,” he says.

“I like it,” she says, then brings up one shoulder in a shrug to make it seem more casual. It’s not weird to compliment your neighbours clothing, Y/N thinks as she glances back down at her phone. “I’m going to order a cheese and they have a great vegetarian pizza too that I like,” she tells Harry while punching in her order on her delivery app.

“Yeah, I’ve had it before, it’s pretty great,” Harry agrees. Y/N can’t help as her body reacts to how low and slow Harry’s voice is. How she gets small chills throughout her body, as if threatening to pebble goosebumps along her arms, and how her mind feels foggy almost as she listens to him speak. She rolls her lips into her mouth and stuffs her phone into the pocket of her fitted black pants. He could tell her the most pointless story and she would let him, just to hear his voice and that accent that went with it. Moving to her fridge, she finds the bottle of red she had opened last night. It’s such a normal thing for her to have a glass or two after work that she doesn’t even think of her guest. He might not even like wine.

“Do you drink?” Y/N asks, looking over her shoulder to see Harry still in the same spot but his hands now in the front pocket of his trousers.

“What are we drinking?” He asks with a smile.

Y/N smiles back, as she always does, and reaches for the wine she had her eye on. “I opened this bottle of wine last night, it’s red. Would you be interested in a glass?” She asks, holding the bottle up for Harry to see.

“I’d love a glass, thanks.”

“Perfect,” Y/N nods and sets the bottle down on the counter beside her fridge. “You can get comfortable on the couch, I’ll bring our drinks in a moment.”

“Sounds good,” Harry nods. With one final glance up her body as she reaches high in her cupboard for two wine glasses for them, he shakes his head and turns around. He has to stop checking her out, he has no idea if she’s into him or not. She’s simply being a nice neighbour, and here he was, fancying her so much he’s checking her out like some horny teenager.

Harry runs a hand through his hair, walking around the back of the couch to take a seat on the corner furthest from where the Christmas tree lit up Y/N’s living room. He really did like all of her joy that she’s put into decorating her home. There’s no doubting her love for the holiday, not a single space feels like it was forgotten as she must have spent all day setting it up. He especially liked the framed photo on the side table to his right, where there was also a rather plain lamp and a Santa spaced coaster too. Inside the frame was a small child who he knew immediately was Y/N. There was no mistaking that smile of hers even at such a young age. She’s sitting on a man’s lap, a man dressed as Santa, but it’s truly the most realistic mall Santa he’s even seen. Harry thinks back to his home in that moment, imagining the many photos of him and his older sister with many variations of mall Santas that must be littering his mum’s house by now. Truthfully, many of them didn’t leave the shelves during the year.

“Here you go,” Y/N says as she holds out a wine glass nearly half full of red wine to Harry. He takes it from her, his fingers brushing hers for a moment and sending those childish tingles through his body.

“Thanks,” he nods and brings the glass to his lips to have a taste. If he wouldn’t be so infatuated by Y/N, he would have told her that he typically didn’t drink red wine. He typically doesn’t drink at all, except for the occasional night out with his mates. But he saw that look on her face that said ‘I need a glass or two’ and he couldn’t say no, knowing it’d make her feel awkward and end up not having a glass herself.

Y/N lets out a long sigh as she takes a seat on the other side of the couch, relaxing alongside Harry as if they aren’t complete strangers. He liked that she felt comfortable around him. She did in fact enter his apartment the other day in a bathrobe and use his shower after all. After she takes another long sip of wine, she sets it down on a matching Santa coaster that sits on the coffee table - Harry notices now that she had brought the bottle of wine with her too.

“Long day?” He questions. Y/N nods, tucking her legs under her as she gets comfortable on the couch beside him. She clears her throat softly before answering him.

“Uh, yeah, work’s just been a lot lately and I’m actually looking forward to some time off,” Y/N says, running a hand through her hair, and then leans her arm on the back of the couch. Harry watches her movements, bringing his glass of wine to his lips to have a small sip, which he notices she watches him do. He likes her eyes on his lips, he thinks before turning his body slightly and setting his wine on the side table. When he turns back and looks her way he notices the slightly tint of pink flushing over her cheeks. Harry fights the tug at his lips to smile at how she seemed to catch on that he caught her staring at his lips.

“That’s always the worst, feeling as if you’re counting down till the days off,” Harry exclaims.

“I typically don’t, to be honest. I love my job,” Y/N states. “It’s my career so I better,” she adds with a chuckle.

“So you’ve already found your career at such a young age then, that’s awesome. Have you always known you wanted to be involved in the fashion industry?” Harry asks, his eyebrows pulled together as he does find himself very curious of how she herself a career so young.

“First off, twenty four is really starting to not feel young anymore so let's not label me as a youngster or anything alright-“

“Um, twenty four is young but okay,” Harry cuts her off with a playful look on his face. Y/N rolls her eyes and chooses to ignore his teasing. He’s always hung out around people older than him and typically dated women older too. But Y/N doesn't seem young. From what he’s seen from her, she doesn’t fit the mold of any twenty four year olds he’s known before - most being rather rude and partying their youth away while it’s obvious that Y/N worked hard during those years. Y/N looks as though she's got the whole world figured out already, and he admires that a lot.

“And secondly, yeah, I guess I sort of did know, not at first, of course, but it was always an interest of mine,” Y/N states, bringing Harry back to their conversation.

“What did you want to be when you were a youngster then?” He questions, using her choice of words back at her which makes Y/N chuckle. She shakes her head and looks up at the ceiling for a moment as she falls back into memories of her childhood. She remembers being emotionally attached to a pair of plastic pink princess slippers and how she slept in her matching tiara for nearly a year before her mom put a stop to her fantasy.

“I wanted to be a princess-“

“Me too,” Harry says.

“Stop interrupting me,” Y/N laughs and reaches across the couch to smack his arm. Harry's head feels light, his cheeks hurt from grinning at Y/N so much. He hasn’t felt like this in quite a while. Being able to have a light conversion with a pretty girl. How she makes him smile and laugh so easily too, it’s a really nice feeling. “But you’d make a much prettier princess for sure-“

“Not at all,'' Harry disagrees, managing to cut her off yet again. She glares at him but can’t help the smile that's still on her face.

“Anyways, I wanted to be a princess and then I wanted to be one of Santa’s elves-”

Harry chuckles, “of course,” he says as he’s not so surprised to hear her say so - seeing as it looked like Santa’s village inside her apartment.

Y/N chooses to ignore his short interruption this time and continues on. “But then as I got older and got ahold of the internet, I wanted to be a model cause I thought it was the most glamorous thing, but I wasn't as beautiful or skinny as Candice Swanepoel so that was out of the question-“

“This is the last time I'll interrupt you I promise,” Harry says, Y/N presses her lips tight together and gives Harry another look as if to say yeah right. “But I cannot let you sit here and say you aren't pretty or skinny enough to be a model, Y/N, because you are one of the most beautiful people I’ve ever seen and your weight is nothing to ever question,” Harry pauses as he looks down at the sofa between them, realizing that he had said all that out loud. He was slightly embarrassed as he’s not sure how she’d take her neighbour saying all that to her.

My heart needs to calm down like now, Y/N thinks as she wets her lips and fidgets with her own hands as she watches Harry. “Y/N, don’t ever think less of yourself,” he adds in a gentle voice that sends chills down her spine.

Y/N doesn't respond right away, because honestly she's speechless. No one has ever said something so kind and so genuine to her. Sure, she’s gotten compliments from people, but the way Harry immediately stopped her from talking poorly of herself had made her stomach stir and her heart race. They had only just met, only had a few interactions - they were all good, great even - but Harry wasn’t like most people she’s met before and she’s beginning to realize that. She looks up to see Harry's watching her, his green eyes staring back at hers. Something switches in the air between them as Harry feels like he should lean in. Should he lean in? Would she want that? Does she want him?

“Thanks,” she smiles, bringing Harry back to their conversation. She clears her throat and sits up straight again, flipping her hair over her shoulders and snuggling into the couch some more. “If I ever feel down about myself again, I’ll be sure to knock on your door and demand you shower me in compliments,” Y/N teases.

“I’d be honoured to,” Harry says. There's another beat of silence, but it's not quiet inside his head. All he’s thinking about is how he should've made a move. She felt it too, right? Harry stops himself before he can go too far inside his head again while thinking about Y/N. “I won’t cut in again. Continue from the dreams of being a model - which you’d be a great model, by the way, don't count that one out just yet.”

Y/N smiles again, not even sure if she’s stopped smiling honestly. “Right, well, modeling led me into the world of fashion. Not that I hadn't known about Vogue or any of the high fashion houses since I did grow up in New York; fashion week had always been a highlight for me. But I actually started to look into the other sides of it. Designing wasn't an option, I just didn't feel original enough. So I did some personal assistant stuff during my high school years at fashion week, working behind the scenes at shows.”

Y/N pauses to lean forward and grabs her glass of wine again, needing liquid to coax her throat before she continued. Harry noticed that she was talking so passionately, probably not even realizing how much she was using her hands while speaking or how her eyes lit up at the world she painted for him. “And then I got a scholarship into FIT, the Fashion Institute of Technology. I was lucky enough to get an internship at my current workplace but quickly got offered a position on my graduation day, and now I'm one of our senior associates.”

“And what does your job really entitled to exactly?”

“We do a lot of things, but we’re really a personal shopper and stylist company. Working with many of New York's elite, even some of the east coast’s elite really, as well as celebrities too, which is always fun to see the dress you styled at the Met Gala or the Grammys. I just do a lot of running around, it feels like,” Y/N explains, “like how I had to rush to the Gucci store on Fifth Ave in order to get some pieces for Mrs. Achibald for tomorrow morning.”

“Sounds like a real tough job,” Harry taunts. Y/N returns his smug look and narrows her eyes at him playfully.

“Right, well what do you do then? You always seem to be home, I’m starting to think you don’t even have a job. Maybe you’ve just got a sugar daddy, hmm?” Y/N jokes. Harry lets out a loud laugh, throwing his head back. Y/N laughs with him before taking a sip of her wine that she had almost forgotten about.

“Definitely not a sugar baby, although that would be the dream, wouldn’t it?”

“Oh, totally,” Y/N nods in agreement. They both chuckle again. Harry reaches for his wine to take a sip before answering her question for real this time. Blame the wine, he thinks, for any longing looks or laughing too much at her jokes just blame the red wine in his glass.

“I’m actually in the music industry, kind of,” Harry states.

“How are you kind of in the music industry?” Y/N questions curiously, her brows pulled together as she takes another sip of wine.

“I am a studio rat, as people in the industry would call it,” Harry says, Y/N’s face scrunches up at his words utterly confused at the term. “I pretty much live in music studios most of the year. Most of my time is taken up by writing. So I guess I’m a songwriter, but I also make demos for my songs with a few people I’ve grown close with in my studio, so I end up doing some instruments for artists' studio versions of songs. I do a bit of producing too, but I mostly leave that to my buddy, Tom.”

“Wow, that sounds like a really cool job. And here I was jabbering on about my job when you’re a songwriter? That’s so cool,” Y/N repeats, another sip of wine going down her throat as she stares at Harry. His cheeks are starting to turn red, eyes avoiding hers as he fidgets with his rings. “Have you written any songs I’d know?” She asks, trying to get more information out of him.

“Maybe,” Harry shrugs.

“You’re not going to tell me?” Y/N asks, brows pulled together.

“Nope,” Harry shakes his head.

“Shouldn’t you be proud of your work?”

“Of course I am,” Harry says, bringing a crooked finger up to his nose before rubbing it twice. “I just know that my music might not be everyone's favourite.”

Since the beginning of his freelance songwriting career, Harry's always been nervous to show people what he’s poured his heart and soul into, especially to people he’s friends with, or people he likes. What if they hated it? He couldn’t bear listening to the fake “it's great” with an even faker smile. Although he knows people do like his songs, those people were mainly artists that bought his songs and their fans, of course, along with his fellow colleagues. He just doesn't want Y/N to hate his work.

“Well, I'm sure it's brilliant,” Y/N says. “And maybe one day you’ll show me.” She adds with a smile, not wanting to force the subject, over the rim of her wine glass before taking another sip and finishing off the red liquid in one small gulp. She frowns at the empty glass and sets it down on the Santa coaster on the coffee table. “Do you write all the time then?” Y/N asks, bringing her gaze back to Harry’s.

“Pretty much, although I’m in the studio less in December due to it being so close to the holidays. I’ve actually got my last session with my mates just in a few days.”

“Counting down the days till you have some time off?” She asks, referring to what he had said earlier to her.

“Not particularly,” Harry says.

Y/N is about to ask why, but then her phone bings from her pocket. It’s then that she realizes she hadn’t thought of looking at her phone once since sitting down with Harry. She had been so engrossed with their conversation, and feeling a light buzz that she managed to forget about the pizza she ordered. The notification on her screen read that her pizza had arrived at the building, and the delivery person would be here any second. Then her phone starts ringing.

“Hello,” Y/N answers the phone in a sweet voice. Harry has to stop himself from staring, instead finding himself grabbing the red wine that he wasn’t too fond of, and has a few sips as he listens to Y/N talk to, what he assumes, is the pizza delivery. She buzzes them up with one tap on her phone before the call ends. “Our dinner is finally here,” she tells Harry, even though he had gathered as much, but he still smiles in response. She stands from the couch and adjusts her pants by pulling them up slightly. They fit her so bloody well, Harry thinks. “And we are both nearly done with a glass of wine each before we’ve even eaten,” Y/N chuckles as she walks past Harry and to the kitchen to her purse.

While Y/N pays for their food, Harry takes it upon himself to top off her glass of wine. He was content with his last few sips between bites. Y/N sets the two pizza boxes on the coffee table before rushing into the kitchen to grab two plates and some napkins for them. They work together in a comfortable silence to get things set up; both boxes open and Y/N settles back onto the couch before they dig into the large New York slices.

Y/N brings a piece straight from the box to her mouth, once she bites into the greasy food she moans around her mouthful of cheesy pizza. Harry is just about to take his first bite as well but stops just short at the sounds that come from Y/N. He dares to glance her way, throat bobbing as he takes her in. Both eyes closed, her head hanging back and lips turned up into a smile as she chews her food. He watches her swallow, utterly mesmerized by her soft skin moving just slightly. Dear god, Styles, get it together, he thinks as he imagines her swallowing something else.

Y/N opens her eyes at the sound of Harry clearing his throat, turning her gaze to him and seeing him lift his piece of pizza to her in a ‘cheers’ manner. “Thanks again for the meal,” Harry says. There his voice does it again, sounding all low and throaty as it makes chills go down her spine.

“No problem,” Y/N nods. She tries to focus back on eating her food, willing the thoughts in her head to go away. But she can’t stop them from entering her dreams later that night after Harry and her had said their goodbye - Harry noticed her yawn a few times and began to clean up their plates and empty wine glasses while he continued to tell Y/N about his time in school before he was writing songs full time on his way to the kitchen. Y/N watched him from her spot on the couch, smiling at how he didn’t think twice on cleaning up after them. She was pretty sure that’s how her dream started too, but then it led to Harry’s voice whispering in her ear, asking if she’s been naughty or nice this year while they laid in bed. Y/N blames the large glass of wine. One hundred percent she blames the wine.

There wasn’t a more perfect day in the year, Y/N was sure of it, as she sat on a bench in Central Park. It was t-minus three weeks before Christmas Day and she had just gotten off work. The sun was slowly setting in the horizon as she stared at the sparkling snow that covered the ground and trees around her.

“Y/N?”

She turns her gaze away from the skating rink in the distance to see who had called out her name. A smile tugs at her lips as she sees Harry a few feet away. He’s dressed in a long dark coat that reaches to his knees, one which was exposed from a rip in his loose fitting jeans. With his outfit he wore a pair of chelsea boots upon his feet that trudged through the snow. Y/N noticed that he was bundled up with a grey scarf around his neck and a matching beanie upon his head too. She liked how his hair flipped up at the ends, sticking out of the beanie.

It has been almost a week since their pizza night together, and thankfully, those wine induced dreams had stopped after that one night, which to be fair were rather innocent compared to some other dreams she had thanks to too much tequila - regardless, it’s making it much less awkward to face him now.

“Hey,” she greets him as she meets his eyes once more. Harry stops by the bench, motioning at the open space to her left.

“Mind if I sit with you?” He asks. Y/N shakes her head and moves to her right just a bit to make more room for him. “Was going for a stroll, thought I was imagining you sitting here by yourself to be honest.” Harry states.

“New York City can seem rather small some days,” Y/N says with a smile.

“Some days, yeah,” Harry nods. “What brings you out to this lonesome bench in Central Park?” Harry asks, looking out at the scenery before them.

“This,” Y/N answers with a hand out to the park.

“It's rather pretty.”

“Very, and calming. And after my day at the office today, I desperately needed to just sit here by myself and disconnect from the world for a moment.”

“Oh,'' Harry says, bringing Y/N’s gaze away from the couple holding hands across the pond and to him instead. “I'm- I'm sorry if I barged in. I just thought it’d be weird if I didn’t say hi.”

“Oh no, it’s totally okay,” Y/N assures him. “I’ve been out here for a good while now.” As if her body realizes at the same time, she shivers beside Harry.

“Did you want to head home?”

“Not particularly,” Y/N hums. Her eyes falling back to the sights before her. The sky is becoming a soft hue of pinks and oranges before their eyes. It warms her heart despite her entire body is cold.

“How about a cup of hot cocoa?” Harry suggests as he sees the cart serving hot drinks just to their right. An older couple and, what seems to be, their grandchildren are being served steaming cups and candy canes too. That seems like something Y/N would like, Harry thinks as he stands from the bench. He's about to offer his hand but thinks twice about it, sticking both his hands into his coat pockets before he can make a fool of himself. “My treat,” Harry adds with a smile.

“I would love that,” Y/N beams while standing from the bench and falling into step with him.

Harry orders for the two of them as they step up to the small cart. Y/N discreetly takes out her phone and opens her Instagram app, swiping to the right to open her camera before she’s bombarded with notifications. She holds down on her screen to begin filming her pointed Versace boots that she had been gifted from work this winter; they had become a staple as the weather grew colder and the snow kept coming down since they had the thickest heel of all the shoes in her closet. Holding the phone up, she catches half of Harry’s body as she films the hot chocolate cart. His back is to the camera, his large coat and beanie covering any angle she did get of him so she’s not afraid to post the story after adding a quick filter to it and typing ‘pro tip: always get a hot chocolate when you’re feeling chilly in central park’ tagging her location as well before hitting post to her story and feeding her nearly five hundred thousand followers with some content for the first time all day.

“Thank you,” Y/N says softly as Harry hands her a to-go cup without a lid since there’s an abundance of whipped cream on top. Her smile turns into a grin as he also reveals he bought her a candy cane. She gasps and is quick to unwrap it and stick it into her mouth.

“Woah, you’re like a toddler itching for a sugar rush, huh?” Harry teases as they begin walking along the path and away from the cart.

“Candy canes are my weakness,” Y/N states as she pushes it to the left side of her mouth in order to talk more clearly.

“Good to know,” Harry smiles over the rim of his cup before opening his mouth and licking off some of the whipped cream. Y/N has to look away as she’s brought back to her dream.

Shaking her head slightly, she brings her phone back up to her face and it unlocks for her. Since it’s still open on the Instagram camera, she holds out her heaping cup of whipped cream and attempts to take a picture as they walk. The first two turn out blurry, then she stops walking, in hopes it’ll turn out nice before Harry can notice she stopped. Only it doesn’t of course, so she ends up furrowing her brows and sucks harder on the candy cane in her mouth before trying three more times to take the perfect snap.

Suddenly, Harry’s hand is in her shot, a blur over her whipped cream. She gasps and looks up to see his forefinger in his mouth, obviously licking off the bit of whipped cream he managed to steal. She’s surprised he did it, and she can tell he is a bit too, but then she huffs out a short chuckle while her mouth is still agape, which makes Harry grin. He doesn’t think twice as he reaches out to swipes his finger over the sweet cream again.

“Stop stealing my whipped cream!” Y/N glares at Harry as he licks his finger clean once more.

“It’s gonna melt anyways, you're taking so bloody long to drink any of it.”

“I'm busy enjoying my candy cane, jeez,” Y/N rolls her eyes and takes the candy out of her mouth, having forgotten about the picture, her phone screen turns blank. Harry shrugs and reaches forward again to steal more. Y/N is faster this time, and moves her cup away from him while bringing her candy cane up and pointing towards him. “Do it again and I'll stab you,” She warns. Harry throws his free hand up in surrender, but both of his cheeks have those deep dimples showing. I’m beginning to really like those dimples, Y/N thinks.

“You get rather hostile over your holiday treats, hm?” Harry questions, raising a brow before slowly retreating his hand to hold his own hot chocolate with his other. He brings the cup to his mouth with both hands and takes a sip.

“Yes, in fact, I do,” Y/N mutters, looking down at her own cup and notices that the whipped cream is nearly gone now. Suppose Harry was right, she missed her chance to enjoy the extra sweetness.

She takes a few sips as they continue to walk together through Central Park. The sky is beautiful as the sunset is in its full glory with dreamy pinks and purples littering the skies. Y/N debates taking a photo but decides against it as she slips her phone into her pocket. Just as she’s about to return the candy cane back to her mouth, she glances over at Harry and notices just as he brings down his own hot chocolate from his mouth that he’s made a bit of a mess.

She chuckles before saying, “you’ve got a little,” Y/N points to her upper lip, “uh, a whipped cream moustache.” She giggles as Harry pokes the tip of his tongue out and swipes it over his top lip. Y/N chuckles some more and offers him her napkin.

“Thanks,” Harry says before wiping it across his mouth, looking back to her to ask, “did I get it all?”

Y/N finds herself staring at Harry for a few moments longer than it would take to give a simple answer if his face was clean or not. She’s never felt so comfortable around someone before, not even her childhood friends or Sammy honestly. There’s this ease around Harry the few times they’ve been around one another, and it makes her heart swell up in her chest. She rolls her lips into her mouth and inhales deeply through her nose, breaking her gaze away from his face and to the ground. In order to not seem weird or awkward, she looks back up and finds his eyes on her while she nods her head.

“Yeah, you’re good,” she tells him. They start their walk through Central Park once more, heading towards home at a slow pace. Y/N has her candy cane back in her mouth, alternating between it and her hot chocolate before it got too cold. She could live off them both one hundred percent; two of the best things ever invented.

“So, tell me about your day,” Harry says, bringing Y/N out of her own thoughts and meeting his gaze again.

“It was a pretty good day, I guess,” she sighs, “we just have a lot of clients that like to do last minute shopping during the holidays and have some pretty crazy demands, but we want to deliver for them so we bend over backwards to do so.”

“I’m sure that can cause you to be rather exhausted then, yeah?”

“Very,” Y/N nods, “but I’m sure your day was much more interesting than mine, so tell me what kind of songs you wrote today?” Y/N asks with a smile.

Harry chuckles and lets Y/N lead the way to their left on the path home, he wasn’t the most confident with getting around sometimes since he usually stuck to the few places in the city that he was familiar with. While he has learned that Y/N is a New York City Native, he trusts her way direction over his, that’s for sure. He thinks back on what he had done today, including a quick run on the treadmill in the gym in their building that ended sooner than he thought as he got a burst of lyrical inspiration out of nowhere.

“I was in my apartment for most of the morning and a bit of the afternoon, then got in a bit of a rut after writing a new song about love, of course. Then I decided I needed to get out of the house and hope for some inspiration from people watching, which I have done a lot since living here,” Harry explains. Y/N takes a big gulp of her nearly cold drink, leaning to her left to get to the garbage they are passing in order to throw out the empty cup. Harry takes the chance to throw his empty cup out too.

“Do you always write about love?” Y/N asks, not thinking twice if it may be a bit too personal of a question. Harry is taken back at first by how that’s all she got from what he had said, but he only clears his throat and shoves his hands into his pockets now that they are free.

“Mostly, yeah,” he nods, “most relatable thing in life, I suppose.”

“Sometimes, I guess it can be,” Y/N agrees and goes back to sucking on her candy cane. She wonders how many times he’s been in love? How many times has she really been in love? Y/N sighs internally and focuses on her steps, avoiding a puddle by having to step closer to Harry. She sniffles from the cold at the same time and is hit with Harry’s scent - lavender, as it always seems to be how he smells. She still thinks it’s lovely.

The two of them make more casual conversation on their fifteen minute walk home through the busy streets. Harry tells her about an elderly couple he had seen just before seeing her, maybe in their 80s, and looking more in love than he’s ever seen before. He wrote a few things about how they looked before going on his way. Y/N tells him about how her grandparents used to go on walks through the park when she was younger, which then brings them into the topic of grandparents in general. Harry tells her about how his grandpa refuses to retire and how his grandma ends up bugging his mom because of how lonely she is. Y/N is smiling the whole time, loving how he must feel comfortable around her too as he’s able to talk about his family like this. Y/N also yawns many times in their short walk. She’s tempted to invite Harry into her apartment for some wine and pizza again but decides against it and simply gives him a smile and soft goodbye at her door, deciding to get into her night routine earlier than normal due to how she can’t stop yawning.

After hanging up her coat, double checking her door was locked, and slipping out of her boots, Y/N pulled her phone out of her pocket to check out what text she missed while on her walk home. She liked how she wanted to feel so present around Harry, having no want to look at her phone but instead being more interested in his little stories about his grandparents. Her face ID unlocks as she looks at the screen. It’s still on the photo she last tried to take for her Instagram. Harry’s hand was a bit of a blur as he stole her whipped cream off the top of her hot chocolate. There was no way to not know it was Harry’s hand, though, his rings being so unique and noticeable in the photo as well - her favourite being his initials wrapped around his fingers in gold. Some would think it’s maybe a bit narcissistic, but Y/N thought it looked good and really there’s no harm in being a narcissist sometimes right?

Y/N saves the photo but doesn’t post it, deciding to simply keep it for herself instead of letting her many followers see into a small yet sweet moment between her and her newest friend. She could call him that right? They were friends? Y/N did hope that Harry thought of her as a new friend too because she was enjoying this time with him a lot, maybe even a little too much.

It had been another day spent at the cafe down the street for Harry. Marking only one last day off till his final studio time this year, he was itching to get to work in a couple days and see his mates too. Over the almost two weeks, he’s written more than he had expected himself to and he knew he could thank a certain new neighbour, or I guess, a new friend, Harry thinks to himself as he turns towards his apartment building. There was no denying the feeling he got around Y/N. He wanted to become more than friends, eventually, no rush of course - but he couldn’t ignore the feeling he got around her; the butterflies and heart racing nearly every moment together. And he couldn’t forget the constant smiling, which he was doing right now just thinking about her.

Harry walks up to the main doors of his apartment building and notices a man beside the main doors. Harry furrows his brows at him. He didn’t look like some strange man trying to find warmth during the beginning of the evening here in the city that had fallen to freezing temperatures as the first week of December came to an end. In fact, he had a brand new iPhone in his hand and rather expensive looking clothes keeping him warm.

“Hey, did you need inside?” Harry asks the man standing by the intercom system. The man looks up at Harry, eyes narrowing at him. He seems Harry’s age, maybe even a few years older judging by the lines around his eyes. He’s got dark eyebrows which makes Harry think he must have dark hair under the beanie he wore under the hood of his thick winter coat. Harry waits for an answer, staring back into the stranger’s brown eyes.

“Yeah, girlfriends not answering and I know she’s inside,” his voice is low and gruff, he then lifts a Starbucks hot cup up - Harry recognizes the holiday pattern anywhere now since Y/N seems to always have one on her even in quick passing in or out of the building. “Even got me to pick her up this stupid drink on my way too, her fault if it’s cold now I guess.”

“Guess so,” Harry mumbles, kind of put off by the man’s attitude. He decides to give him the benefit of the doubt and holds the door open for it. The man walks in without so much of a thank you. You’re welcome, Harry sarcastically thinks to himself.

They walk together to the elevator in an awkward silence. Once the doors open Harry steps up to the buttons and hits the sixth one, not bothering to ask the man what floor he needs as he steps away. The stranger gives the lit up button a brief look before he’s staring down at his phone. As the elevator moves Harry’s mind wanders off to how he’d assert himself into Y/N’s evening today. Maybe he could make her dinner, then ask if she’d like to walk over to Central Park after because he knows how much she enjoys it there, and when they decide to take a break from walking and find a bench he’d finally get the nerve to make a move - maybe reach for her hand during the walk even. One thing was for sure, he liked Y/N and he needed to buck up and do something about it.

He’s still deep in thought about Y/N when the elevator doors open. The man he let into the building steps out first without even glance at Harry. Typical New Yorker, he thinks. Harry finds himself looking at where Y/N’s apartment door is over the man's shoulder as they walk down the hall, he’s debating just walking right up and asking her to hang out right away. But then the man stops in front of the door that reads 602 - Y/N’s door.

Y/N hears the knock on her front door and blinks rapidly at her laptop screen, unfocusing from her long email that she was to send to her boss, Amanda, within the hour with an update on how the first week of December had gone. She glances at the time and sees it’s nearly four in the afternoon. Took him long enough, she thinks while rolling her eyes and standing from the couch. Just as she’s a few steps away there’s another knock on the door. She sighs and unlocks it, quickly throwing the door open to reveal Mark standing on the other side.

“You are home,” he says, that attitude she knows so well is thick in his voice already. Y/N opens her mouth, about to sass him back, but then she notices a certain tall figure with a mess of brown hair walking behind Mark.

“Harry,” Y/N breathes out, hoping he didn’t even hear it honestly. But he slows his steps and gives her a tight lipped smile once facing her. It’s one she was not familiar with and makes her stomach feel as though it was full of rocks.

“Hey,” he says with a small three finger wave.

“You know this guy?” Mark, her boyfriend, questions. Bringing her eyes from Harry’s green ones and to his brown ones instead. “He was nice enough to let me into this place since you were too busy,” he states.

Y/N tucks her lips into her mouth and looks away from Mark and back to Harry. She knows he’s questioning everything by the look in his eyes. She tried. Well, maybe not hard enough, but she wanted to tell him about Mark, even just casually and quickly. Y/N didn’t intend to give Harry any sort of mixed signals during their times together, she really was just being polite and ended up enjoying being around him so much that she thought there was no harm in making a new friend. But she’d be an idiot to try and deny she felt something more than friendship with Harry.

“Yeah, uh,” she clears her throat and waves a hand between the two young men, “Mark, this is Harry my uh, my neighbour. Harry this is Mark, my boyfriend.”

Well shit, that’s not ideal, Harry thinks as he looks into Y/N’s eyes and prays he heard her wrong. But he knows he didn’t. So, he just takes a deep breath and forces a smile to stay on his face while holding a hand out to Mark, even though it hurt him to be polite to the guy that was dating the girl he’s been crushing on for nearly two weeks now.

“It’s nice to meet you,” Harry says as Mark grasps his hand and shakes it lazily. Shit handshake, he thinks. “I would love to stay and chat but I’ve got some work to get to,” he says quickly after taking his hand out of Mark’s and backing away from the situation towards his own apartment.

Y/N opens her mouth, but the words don’t come out. She just watches as Harry turns on his heels and his posture hunches as he gets to his door and tries to unlock it quickly. Mark is suddenly pushing past Y/N, saying something but she’s too focused remembering the look on Harry’s face just moments ago. She steps back into her apartment and doesn’t look over to where Harry is shutting his own door before closing her own gently.

Really fucked this up didn’t you, Y/N? She thinks as she turns the lock on her door and listens to Mark complain about his day while flinging his belongings around her living room. What is she going to do? What is she going to say? If Harry ever talks to her again, that is. She sighs and closes her eyes before making her way towards where her boyfriend was lounging on her couch, giving him a small smile as he opened his arms for her to sit with him.

“I did miss you these past few weeks while I was away,” Mark says, planting a quick kiss to her hair as she leans into his body - praying he doesn’t question why her heart is beating so fast. She’s sure he wouldn’t enjoy knowing it’s because of her growing feelings for her new neighbour, and seeing the realization in Harry’s face at the fact she wasn’t single kind of hurt to see.

“Missed you too,” she mumbles, lying. Y/N hadn’t thought about her boyfriend all that much these past, almost, three weeks that he was away for a business trip.

“Do much without me?” Mark asks.

Y/N shakes her head, “no, not much at all,” her soft voice replies while she begins to zone out on the wall that was between her and Harry’s apartments, noticing how it made her feel more separated from him now more than ever.

>> part two <<

thanks for reading, please reblog/leave some feedback if you enjoyed it! until next week 😘

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sei-hoe · 3 years

Text

manager pt. 3

ok, it’s finally getting spicy in here y’all. this is my favorite chapter so far, actually idk because pt. 2 and the fingers (drools), but there’s more of that in here heheh. i hope you enjoy!!!

Reader x Tendou Satori feat. Ushijima & Semi

Part 1 - Part 2 - Part 3 - Part 4 - Part 5

TW: gaslighting, manipulation, fingering, hand kink, sex, language, toxic men omg

WC: 2.8k

Summary: Practice has ended, do you go through with what you have planned with Tendou? (spoilers: yes you do 🥵)

The final whistle blew signaling the end of practice. The team huddled together by the water cooler next to where you were sitting on the bench. Feeling as though you should join them, you stood up and walked over to stand next to Tendou. His body was close, heat radiating off his damp skin. He smelled like sweat, it wasn’t a bad thing though. As much as he fooled around during practice he also worked very hard, making himself one of the best middle blockers in the prefecture. You looked up at him as Ushijima gave his closing remarks to the team, he looked down at you with a lazy half smile giving you instant butterflies as you quickly looked away, blushing.

The huddle was dismissed, Tendou pulled you aside, lightly stroking your arm with his bandaged fingertips. “I’m going to shower real quick. Wait for me? I’ll be like five minutes.”

You nodded and Tendou jogged in the direction of the locker room. As you started packing up your belongings you were getting lost in thought, did you want this? You could just leave. You knew what was going to happen if he got you alone. Casually flirting was one thing, but being alone with him in his car was another. It’s not that you weren’t attracted to Tendou, but you weren’t sure if you wanted to do anything sexual with him yet. You felt like throwing up, what had you gotten yourself into? Before you could work through things in your head Ushijima cleared his throat to make his presence known.

“I don’t know what your relationship with Tendou is…” he lied. “But you don’t have to do anything you don’t want to.”

You looked anywhere but his eyes, embarrassed as you stuttered out an answer.

“I don’t know what you’re talking about.” you lied back to him.

He smiled as he walked to sit on the bench next to you, taking a drink from his water bottle. “Then it looks like I know something you don’t.” You looked at him, confused.

“Tendou is planning on you giving him head tonight in his car.” The captain spoke bluntly. “He told me in great detail during practice.”

“Oh god.” You cradled your head in your hands. What have you done?

“Is that not something you want?” He feigned concern. You wanted to disappear, to be anywhere but there. You didn’t want to talk about this with the guy you liked, the guy you had fantasies about. He leaned closer, “because if it’s not, you shouldn’t have led him on like that.”

Your eyes widened as your head whipped in his direction. “What?”

He took a breath.

“Did you know that we are ranked within the top eight teams in the whole country?” Ushijima looked off towards the court while you looked at him, eyes glassy and focused. “That’s something that takes rigorous practice and time...we don’t have social lives outside of each other.”

“I don’t unders-”

“That’s where you come in. You were oh so willing to be our little manager, coming in here all shy and clinging to Tendou. Don’t you think he deserves it? Don’t you think we deserve it?”

You were piecing together the puzzle. Connecting the dots. None of them had girlfriends, you never saw any of them talking to girls in the hallways during passing periods. The team had a sleazy reputation, for an unknown reason minutes ago, but now you knew why.

Ushijima scoffed when he saw your appalled expression. “Don’t act like you’re so surprised. Why else did you come here? To make friends?” He leaned closer, his whispered breath hitting your ear, “we’ll be the best friends you ever had”.

Maybe a part of you wanted this and knew it was coming. You told yourself this morning that this was a bad idea but you came anyway. You were still shocked at Ushijima’s behavior. You now knew the look he had given you before practice began wasn’t anger, but arousal and maybe jealousy. Then it hit you, just as much as you wanted Ushijima, he wanted you back.

“Sorry to embarrass you, but Tendou told me about your cute little crush.” He wasn’t sorry. He loved the panicked look in your eyes, it made you more pliable. You put your head back in your hands willing this moment away.

“Ah ah”, he tutted, pulling your hands away. “Look at me.” His sweaty palms coerce your head to turn in his direction. You hesitantly lift your glistening eyes to his stern ones.

“It’s okay, you’re okay.” He stares into your eyes convincing you that this is all okay. He’s okay with your crush, he’s okay with your hesitance. He leans in closer, face only inches away from yours, his thigh brushing against yours, a warm contrast to the freezing metal sticking to the back of your thighs.

He whispered against your lips. “Tell me to stop. Tell me to stop if you don’t want this.”

He waited a beat and you remained silent as he pressed his lips against yours. His mouth was hot and wet. Even though you knew it was coming it still took you by surprise. Your wide eyes eventually fluttered shut as you leaned into the kiss, resting your hand on his hard chest, gripping his practice jersey. His heart beats were steady, opposite to your sporadic ones. You felt his tongue licking against your lips, attempting to gain access to your mouth. You let him in, savoring the moment that your tongues intertwined in your mouth. This wasn’t your first kiss by any means, but it was your first kiss with Ushijima and one that you will remember forever.

The door to the gymnasium opened with the sound of a metal creaking against metal followed by footsteps and two voices. Ushijima pulled away from the kiss slowly, strings of saliva still connecting his mouth to yours until he distanced himself enough for them to break.

Looking into your eyes he spoke with a half smile, “You gonna be good for us?”

“Mhm.” You nodded hazily as Ushijima looked over your shoulder to investigate the disturbance. Tendou and Semi walked over to the two of you, shit-eating grins on both faces. Ushijima stood up and bridged the gap between you and the two new arrivals. They began talking about you like you weren’t sitting there, mouth agape wondering what the fuck was going on.

“Well, what do you think captain?” Tendou asked enthusiastically. “Do I know how to pick ‘em or what?”

“She’ll be perfect...well done”. Ushijima pondered.

“That’s as much of a compliment you’re going to get from him.” Semi laughed.

“You ready to go baby?” Tendou looked at you. You nodded, quickly packing up your backpack and grabbing your phone. Tendou laced his hand through your own as you walked to the parking lot. He smelled good, his hair was still damp from his shower so it wasn’t sticking up straight like normal.

The cool night air hit you as you exited the building making you wrap your jacket around yourself tighter. You looked back at Ushijima and Semi who turned to the opposite side of the parking lot. Ushijima held your gaze, the same look on his face as earlier, the one you couldn’t quite place.

“Have fun!” Semi yelled across the parking lot. Tendou chuckled and smiled down at you. “We will.” He answered to you instead.

_____

Tendou’s car is pretty much exactly what you would picture. Messy. Fast food bags in the backseat, school papers everywhere, various volleyball paraphernalia and empty energy drink cans littering the floor.

“Shit, sorry” he murmured as he brushed past you to throw everything that was occupying the passenger seat into the back. He gestured for you to get in. Hesitantly you ducked down and slid into your seat. Was this safe? Should you trust these practical strangers? Your thoughts were interrupted by the sound of the driver’s side door opening and Tendou’s legs making their way into the car followed by the rest of him. He just seemed like one of those tall lanky guys that would drive the smallest beat up car.

One of those tall lanky guys who had a long, thick cock to match.

You looked out the window as you thought about what was about to happen, taking a deep breath you reflected. You wanted this, you repeat this to yourself. What else did you have to do? You’re going to be involved in school activity, or rather a school activity is going to be involved in you. Whatever. You thought about what Ushijima said. About how hard the team works, every single day. Don’t you think we deserve it? His words resonate in your head. You took a hesitant look at Tendou. He was scrolling through his phone while his car warmed up. Doesn’t he deserve it?

You lean across the center console to put your head on his shoulder. Tendou locked his phone, setting it on the dashboard, chuckling, “I have to hand it to ‘em, Ushi always knows just what to say.”

“You deserve it Tendou.” you looked up at him with innocent eyes. You don’t know where this sudden courage was coming from but you reached down to grab his hand that was resting on this thigh. Taking his pointer finger between your thumb and pointer finger you begin lightly rubbing, moving up and down his stupidly long finger. His eyes went half-lidded and he quietly groaned as you made your way closer to his face. Completely mesmerized by your soft ministrations he hooked his arms underneath yours and moved you onto his lap. His erection was poking against your ass, your suspicions confirmed that his cock matched his body type.

Whispering against his soft pink lips, “you like having your fingers played with?”

He closed the gap between your mouths desperately. His kiss was different from Ushijimas. Where he felt practiced and calm, Tendou’s kiss felt heated and needy. His tongue instantly slipping into your mouth to lick everywhere he could reach; your cheek, teeth, tongue, lips; nothing was excluded. He was rutting up onto your ass desperate for any kind of stimulation he could get. You were still stroking his fingers as he brought both hands in front of your face.

“Suck.” he pushed his pointer and middle fingers past your lips, you accepted them greedily, wetting them with the excessive amount of saliva your mouth has been producing. Leaning back in his seat he watches you, mouth slightly agape, smiling. He pushes further, too far, causing your throat to constrict around his digits.

“You gonna gag on my cock like that too you little slut?”

You moan, unashamedly taking everything he would give you. He continues to rub himself against you, grabbing your half exposed ass with his other hand feeling your lacy panties for the first time.

“See you act all innocent, but you’ve been wearing this underneath your skirt all day?” His hand caresses the fat of your ass and squeezes its way around to the front of your thigh until his fingers are playing with the hem of your panties on your upper leg. His bony fingers snake their way under your panties, moaning as he feels the evidence of your arousal, thick and slippery on his fingertips.

“You don’t need any prep at all do you?” he condescends. His fingers toy with your wet little hole, playing with the tight ring keeping him out of your cunt. He pushes in with two fingers. It didn’t matter how wet you were, it was a stretch, length and girth-wise. You winced, biting down slightly on the fingers still penetrating your throat. Pulling his fingers out of your mouth he reached down to release his aching cock from his sweats. His other hand pulling your panties to the side you felt his cock brush against your folds.

“Looks like we’re going to have to save that blow job for next time.” he mentions as he begins prodding your cunt with the tip of his painfully hard cock. You wished you were able to get a good look at it, but you supposed you could save that for next time as well. The stretch was burning as he slid into your drippy hole, inch by inch. His head tipped back in pleasure, Adam’s apple bobbing as he swallowed. Seizing the opportunity, you latched onto his neck, sucking bruises onto his pale complexion as he began to bottom out.

He pulled you off of his neck by your hair, “don’t do that.” Embarrassed, your cheeks began to heat up, but a blush wasn’t given the opportunity to form as he began to move inside of you. Your gummy walls grip every ridge and vein of his cock as he holds onto your hips.

“Can’t be all marked up for games” he grunts, his eyes shut tightly, savoring the way you feel around him.

“Sorry Tend-”

“Aww, getting all shy on me now, huh? Where’d the little girl who was sucking on my fingers go?” You buried your face in the crook of his neck as he wreaked havoc on your poor little pussy. You could act as confident as you wanted, but this was still a crazy experience for you. You opened your eyes to take in the scene in front of you. Tendou’s neck was flushed, damp from sweat, veins jutting out ever so slightly. You lick a cautious stripe up his most prominent vein. He chuckles, “that’s ok baby, you can do that”. His hand is still weaved in your hair as he lets you have your fun.

The car windows were fogging up as the sun was almost completely set. “Fuck baby, you feel so good.” You feel your pussy clenching down on him and a familiar feeling churning in the pit of your stomach. He could feel it too, reaching down he toys with your clit. Rubbing small circles around it, various mixtures of praise and degradation pouring from his mouth, egging you on.

“You gonna cum for me? Huh?” he goads. “I want you to.” That’s all it took to push you over the edge. His thumb stills, but applies pressure as you spasm and moan over his cock and fingers. Head now heavy with sleep you rest your head on his warm shoulder.

“I don’t think so.” he commands, shaking his head and pulling you upright by the hand still attached to your hair. “You’re gonna watch me ruin this pussy.”

His humping was getting sloppy and uncontrolled and you began to get overstimulated.

“You on the pill?” You nod, eyes glued to his. “Thank fuck,” several hurried thrusts later, his thrusting stilled and he was spilling himself inside of you.

“Fuuuckkk,” he moaned, still holding your head in place ensuring that you were watching. You felt so full, his thick, sticky seed finding a nice home inside of you. He took a moment to catch his breath, releasing your hair from his sweaty palm, letting his head fall back against the headrest. He grabs his phone from the dashboard, to snap a quick picture of your abused cunt before you could protest.

“For later,” he murmurs, staring at the screen illuminating his face.

He pulled out and tucked himself back into his sweats. You felt so empty all of a sudden, your pussy still molded to the shape of him. He slid your panties back in place.

“We wouldn’t want any to slip out,” he smiled lazily at you.

___

The drive home was a quiet one. The radio was playing quietly in the background and the sun had completely set at this point. The only light was coming from the headlights in oncoming traffic. You directed him whenever he had to make a turn, but otherwise neither of you said a word. He had his hand resting on your thigh, which was reassuring you suppose. Maybe he was just tired after cumming. You had arrived in front of your house in record time; Tendou was a bit of a reckless driver. You unbuckle your seatbelt and reach for your backpack, not expecting another interaction. But he got out of the car to walk around to open your door, something you hadn’t expected.

Getting out of the car and walking towards your front door you mutter, “thanks Tendou, I’ll...uh...see you tomorrow I guess.”

“Hey, come here,” he spoke, pulling your arm towards him. You crash into his chest. Raising a finger to your chin, he lifts it. “You were everything I needed you to be today.” He kisses you on the lips then takes a step back.

“Also I kinda love knowing that you’re keeping my cum warm for me in there,” he ran his hand up your lower abdomen. Tendou released you from his hold and circled back around the car. You stood there once again, mouth agape, face beet red.

“See you tomorrow manager.”

#tendou satori x reader #tendou satori x reader smut #tendou satori smut #tendou smut #tendou x reader smut #haikyuu smut #haikyuu x reader #haikyuu x reader smut #shiratorizawa #shiratorizawa smut

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fruitcoops · 4 years

Note

More “biting” 😉 stories of coops please?

Anon 1: Do you think you’d be willing to do more kinky coops? Maybe a follow up to truth or drink where Sirius gets tied up again?

Anon 2: Mixed prompts 80-83 pls!!

Happy Valentine’s Day, everyone! This is part 1 of today’s fics--hope you enjoy! Coops credit goes to @lumosinlove, whom I love and adore.

TW for restraint kink, edging, smut, and hickeys

Mixed Prompt 80: “ You’re going to regret that sweetheart.”

81: “Are we clear?”

82: “Try to stay quiet, understand?”

83: “Don’t hold back, baby.”

“Did you see Coach’s email?” Remus asked as he scrolled through his inbox and reached for another piece of chocolate; they were shaped like little hearts, because Sirius was a sweet, sweet muppet of a man and had a romantic streak wider than the continental US.

“I did, yeah,” Sirius said from the doorway to the kitchen. “It’ll be pretty nice, having two days off in a row.”

Remus read through the rest of the message. Too much snow, unsafe conditions, practice cancelled, yada yada yada. A sudden thought struck him and he glanced up. “Hey, maybe we could try something a little more…”

Sirius grinned as the chocolate clattered to the countertop, along with Remus’ phone. “Happy Valentine’s Day, sweetheart.”

Remus swallowed around the sudden dryness of his mouth. Chest. Arms??? THIGHS. FUCK. “Huh?”

“I was saving these for our actual day off, but it seems fate had other plans.” Sirius’ grin became a downright smirk as he quirked an eyebrow and bent his knee.

“When—how—what?” Remus couldn’t tear his eyes away from the tight, dark red fabric that covered Sirius’ legs up to his thighs. Bows. The socks had bows on the top, and they matched his underwear. “How long have you been standing there?”

Sirius shrugged. The upper half of his body was bare, and Remus tracked the movement of every muscle. “About five minutes. Your email must be very exciting.”

A soft whine escaped his throat. “Where did you get those?”

“Online.” Sirius flexed his thigh and all the air rushed from Remus’ lungs. “Why, do you like them?”

“I want to take them off with my teeth,” he blurted. “Fucking hell, Sirius.”

“That can be arranged.” Mischief played at the edge of his mouth as he began backing away. “Though you’ll have to catch me first.”

And he ran. Remus stood there in shock for a moment before sprinting after him, skidding on the floor as he grabbed the bannister. Sirius was already on the bed when he made it to their room and snapped the top of one thigh-high at Remus playfully.

“You’re going to regret that, sweetheart.”

“Promise?”

Remus was on him in an instant, sucking a bruise into the side of his neck as he pushed Sirius’ arms over his head and settled between his thighs, grinding his hips down. “How long have you had these?” When Sirius smiled instead of responding, he bit down on his shoulder. “Tell me.”

“Four days.”

“Where did you hide them?”

Sirius gasped at the pressure on his wrists. “Nightstand.”

“Do you have any idea what you look like right now?”

A slow, smug look covered his face and he nipped Remus’ bottom lip. “Yes.”

“Turn over.” Sirius bucked his hips up instead, and Remus let go of his hands to flip him hard enough he bounced a bit, then attached his mouth to his shoulder blade. “God, you look fucking incredible in red, baby.”

“You think this was an accident?”

“Somebody’s feeling bratty.” Remus dragged his blunt nails down Sirius’ ribs, and he shivered. “Just for that, I’m going to finger you until you’re begging for it. Are we clear?”

Sirius turned his head to the side and rolled his hips back. “I’m not begging for anything.”

“We’ll see.” Remus continued mouthing along the strong line of his shoulders as he fumbled blindly in the nightstand drawer for the lube, then paused. He straddled Sirius’ waist and leaned over to sift through the various items that they had tossed in without thinking—playing cards, a book, Sirius’ tie, a few condoms that they hadn’t touched in months… “What the fuck?”

“What?”

“Where’s the lube?”

“Are we out?”

Dread pooled in Remus’ gut. The mere thought of trekking through the snow to get lube or—even worse—finding out all the stores were closed was almost enough to kill his boner. Almost. Sirius was still in red underwear and fucking thigh highs, after all. “No. We can’t be out. Didn’t we just buy some the other day?”

Sirius shrugged. “It’s been a while, I don’t know.”

“It has been a while,” Remus muttered.

“I think I put some in the laundry room so we would have extra.”

Relief made butterflies erupt in his chest and he kissed Sirius’ cheek. “You are so smart and I love you. Hang on one second, okay?”

Remus’ hands shook a little bit as he hurried back downstairs and down the hall, standing on his tiptoes to see into the cupboards. Laundry detergent, Windex, fabric sheets, two pairs of Jules’ socks…

He pushed the detergent aside and felt around for the familiar bottle. “Where the hell did you put it? Come on, baby, work with me here.”

Clear plastic caught the light on the highest shelf and Remus thumped his forehead against the washing machine. He got the stepstool with minimal grumbling and grabbed the lube, making a mental note to block that entire shelf and remind Sirius that he was five foot fucking eleven, which was well above average.

“Baby, we need to have a discussion about—” He stopped cold in the bedroom doorway, then sighed. “Really?”

Sirius arched his back as he pressed two fingers back into himself, his jaw going a little slack. “You were slow.”

Remus took a deep breath when he saw the half-full bottle of lube on the bed next to him. “Where’d you hide that?”

“Under my pillow. You didn’t even check.” Sirius’ breath caught as his hand changed angles, but his smile remained. “I thought you’d call me on it for sure.”

“You know, most people wouldn’t play terribly mean tricks on their fiancé on Valentine’s Day, especially when that fiancé was already going to fuck them so hard they can’t walk straight,” Remus said as he walked slowly toward the bed and tossed the other bottle next to Sirius. “You’d better count your lucky stars we don’t have practice for the next two days.”

“Oh?” Sirius eyes fluttered shut for a second and he reached for more.

Remus smacked his hand away. “Yes. Was the shelf really necessary?”

“I had to delay you somehow. Did you use the stepstool, or did you climb on the dryer?”

“None of your fucking business, tall-ass. Turn over.”

“Make me.”

Remus reached back into the nightstand and pulled the tie out, manhandling Sirius’ arms over his head and tying them to the small ring they had put in the headboard for that exact purpose. Sirius made a confused noise when Remus grabbed his silky-soft underwear off the foot of the bed and slid it back up his legs until it was snug and tight again. “Much better.”

“Wait, wait, wait, what happened to fucking me until I can’t walk straight?” Sirius’ eyebrows drew together and he nudged his leg against Remus’ side, only to have it guided back down by a firm hand. “Come on, sweetheart, it’s Valentine’s Day!”

“Is it? I hadn’t noticed,” Remus said drily as he squeezed the thin strip of bare skin on Sirius’ thighs. “Between the super fun game of tag and then hide-and-seek, I thought you didn’t want me to touch you.”

“But you will, right?” Nervousness laced his voice. “Right?”

“Maybe. Might get myself off and then leave you here, though.” He leaned over and dragged his lips down Sirius’ chest. “I’m still on the fence.”

“Non, non, non, get off the fence. The fence is not a fun place to be.”

“Really?” He continued to the edge of Sirius’ waistband and dipped his tongue under the satiny fabric, then feathered his mouth along the outline of his dick until Sirius’ knees started inching upward in pleasure. “Hmm. I think it’s a great place to be, actually. You could beg yourself hoarse and I wouldn’t have to do a goddamn thing.”

“What do I have to do?” Sirius panted. The front of his boxers was already darkening with precome and his pupils dilated when Remus palmed himself through his pants.

“Try to stay quiet, understand?”

Sirius clenched his thighs around Remus’ waist as he pulled his shirt off, only to shakily straighten them out again when Remus fixed him with a withering look. His dick looked painfully hard as Remus got off the bed and slid his pants down his legs, giving Sirius a great view of his ass under the tight black underwear he was wearing.

“Oh, yeah, that was supposed to be a surprise for you,” he said mildly when Sirius whined. “It’s Valentine’s Day, after all. One of us was getting railed tonight.”

Sirius perked up. “Really?”

“That was the original plan. Now that you’ve got these—” He plucked the edges of the thigh-highs as he knelt on the mattress again. “—I might need to rethink that idea.”

“Nope, no you don’t.” Sirius wrapped his legs around Remus’ hips and tugged him down. “You really don’t need to rethink that, it sounds like a fantastic idea—”

Remus pressed his palm over Sirius’ mouth and pushed his legs down with the other. “What did I say about being quiet?”

A soft noise tore from his chest as Remus ran the heel of his hand up Sirius’ dick and felt it twitch beneath the fabric. “Desolée,” he said as Remus scooted backwards a few inches. “Desolée, mon coeur.”

“Good job.” Sirius sighed happily as he worked a hickey onto the bit of skin between his underwear and his socks, but his chest hitched when Remus moved barely an inch to the side.

“What’re you doing?”

“Decorating.”

“Me?”

He sighed and bracketed Sirius’ ribs with his elbows, resting his chin on his hands. “Yes, you. You’re beautiful, and I’m just making sure people know you’re appreciated. Now be quiet.”

“Nobody’s going to see those. They’ll be gone in three days.”

“I’ll know.” Remus placed a slightly darker bruise on his inner thigh and Sirius’ hips canted to the side with pleasure. He hummed against his skin, then pulled away. “I’ll have to finish these when I turn you over.”

“When?”

“If.”

“Re.”

“Oh, come on,” he scoffed with a smile, leaning up for a brief kiss. “You know me better than that.”

Sirius’ eyes crinkled. “I do.”

“Let me enjoy myself in the meantime, yeah? I think I deserve it after everything you’ve done today,” he teased, adding new hickeys to Sirius’ other thigh until the bare skin was mostly dark lilac. He skimmed kisses down both his legs, paying special attention to the backs of his knees and the cute little bows at the tops of his thighs. “I love these.”

“Yeah?” A pink flush spread to Sirius’ chest.

“Yeah. Somehow, they’re both adorable and sexy.” Remus reached up and tapped his nose. “Just like you.”

And then he licked a long, slow stripe up the front of Sirius’ underwear, which made him shake from head to toe. “Oh, fuck me.”

“Not yet.” He did it again, this time giving his hips a squeeze. A choked moan slipped through and he shushed him softly. “Quiet, baby, remember? I’ll tell you when you can make noise for me.”

“Oh.” Sirius’ eyebrows pitched upward as Remus slowly slid the sticky fabric down and replaced it with his tongue. “S’il vous plait. S’il vous plait, mon cœur, je le veux, s’il vous plait. ”

“What did I tell you?”

“I—I—” Sirius clenched his teeth as Remus sucked just the head of his dick into his mouth. His abdomen jolted under Remus’ palms.

“You’re getting all accent-y.” Remus smirked, leaving a mark on the crest of his hipbone. “I told you that you could beg yourself hoarse and I wouldn’t have to do a god—” He kissed the soft skin below Sirius’ ribs. “—damn—” Another kiss, just under his sternum. “—thing.”

A tremor ran through Sirius and he pulled on his restraint for a moment, hard enough that the headboard creaked. “Ngh. I love you.”

“I love you, too. I think it’s time to finish those decorations, hmm?”

Sirius nodded enthusiastically and Remus untied his hands, flipping him by the hips for the second time. He practically purred as Remus tied him up again and pressed his hands into that broad back; Remus pushed his knees until they bent and Sirius propped himself on his elbows, breathing heavily and bare but for his thigh high socks.

“Color?”

“Green.” There was no hesitation in his voice.

“Good.” Instead of going straight to his legs again—which were flexed in the new position and doing absolutely wonderful things to Remus’ thought process—Remus grabbed the half-empty lube and poured some on his fingers.

“What’re you doing?” Sirius asked, trying to shift around and see. He froze when the first finger pushed in without an issue. “Huh. But—but you said—”

“I didn’t tell you to start making noise.” Sirius pressed his face into the pillow and his knees jerked inward as Remus added a second finger. “You already did this part for me, didn’t you?”

“Mhmm.”

“But I didn’t tell you to.”

“No.” The word was barely a whisper.

“And as much as I love you—” He kissed Sirius’ lower back and scraped his teeth along the dimples there. “—and want to make you fall apart, I can’t let you do whatever you want without consequences.”

“Yes, you can,” Sirius gasped, tightening around him as Remus pressed upward. “You can, I don’t mind.”

“No, I can’t, and you’d better be quiet before I drag this out even longer.”

There was a beat of silence while Sirius got ahold of himself again. “How long? The usual?”

“Since it’s Valentine’s Day, eight minutes.” Remus smoothed a hand up his spine and pressed down between his shoulder blades until most of his upper chest was on the pillows before slowly dragging his fingers in and out, pushing just next to his sweet spot until Sirius quaked with the effort of suppressing his moans. He added a third finger a moment later and Sirius’ thighs knocked together. “Hold yourself up, baby.”

Sirius pulled his elbows in once again, supporting his chest as Remus added a few new hickeys to his thigh and stretched him slow and deep. He gave his wrist a twist when he moved to the right side and Sirius dipped for half a second, one leg threatening to give out.

“Hold yourself up,” Remus reminded him, wrapping an arm around his lower belly and lifting slightly; Sirius’ breath caught and his shoulders folded in a bit. “You okay?”

“Ouais.”

“Alright. Two minutes left.” He pushed his fingers in further and felt the ripple of pleasure roll through Sirius under his mouth, then kissed the middle of his back. “Like that?”

“Uh-huh.” Sirius’ voice was tight with pleasure and wavered with swallowed moans.

Remus flexed his fingers and brushed against his prostate; Sirius nearly collapsed onto the bed and a whining noise was half-muffled by the sheets. “What was that?”

“ ‘s nothing, ‘s nothing, keep going.” Sirius tried to get to his elbows again, but even though Remus had stopped moving, he seemed to be having trouble. “Sweetheart, please.”

“You know the rules, baby. Five more minutes.”

“I can’t—I can’t—”

“You will.” Remus rubbed Sirius’ side to soothe him, but didn’t take his fingers out. “How about this: if you can hold yourself up and make no noises for two full minutes, I’ll fuck you and you can come whenever you want. Sound good?”

Sirius nodded frantically and struggled to get his knees under himself. “D’accord.”

“Time starts…now.” Remus kept his eyes on the clock as he plucked at Sirius’ seams, spreading his thighs to get a better angle when it looked like he was starting to relax into the feeling. One minute left. Something that would have been a moan if Sirius had a little less willpower lodged in his chest and he tensed around Remus, legs shaking with arousal. He was damn near dripping onto the sheets.

Forty-five seconds. Remus bit his lip and ran his free hand up Sirius’ thigh, digging into the bruises just enough to get his attention. “You look so pretty with these,” he murmured, leaving a trail of small bites down his spine. “It must have been hard finding thigh highs that fit, huh? You’re so strong, so beautiful, and I love that about you.” He made sure to run over Sirius’ sweet spot on every drag until his breaths got shallower and his dick twitched. Twenty seconds. “You don’t really want to come right away, do you? You like it when I take control. You like being tied down and edged until you’re a mess. Ten seconds left, baby.”

Sirius’ back bowed as Remus’ hand brushed his dick. “Pas juste,” he blurted, then groaned when Remus paused. “Fuck.”

“Was that a sound?”

“No, no it wasn’t.” He pushed back against Remus’ hand and whined when he pulled his fingers out. “Re, I only had five seconds left.”

“Bummer, isn’t it?” Remus said with mock-pity, rubbing wide circles along Sirius’ ass and thighs.

“One more chance?”

“We had a deal, love. Two minutes, no sounds, no falling. You did so well and then you tripped at the finish line.”

“You touched my dick.”

“Was that against the rules?”

Sirius huffed and glared over his shoulder, though the effect was somewhat ruined by the pink of his cheeks and the pleading look in his eye. “It was in my head.”

Remus made a sympathetic noise. “It’s a shame you’re not in charge today, then. Chest down.”

“I want to see you.”

“Later. Down.” Sirius rolled his eyes, but complied so his back sloped in a gentle curve; Remus smacked his thigh lightly. “Don’t roll your eyes at me.”

“Oops.”

“Apologize.” When he stayed silent, Remus slid two fingers back into him. “Sirius, apologize or I’ll get you off by fingering you.”

“I’m sor—sorry.” His hips jerked as Remus pushed on his prostate one last time.

“That wasn’t so hard, huh?” He pulled his own underwear down and tossed it to the side, reaching down to push Sirius’ thighs apart while he lubed up. “Don’t hold back, baby, you can be loud now.”

“Oh thank God,” Sirius breathed, shuddering a bit as Remus pressed in and began to move. “Oh—oh, oh fuck.”

“Color?”

“Fuck—green.” He gripped the poor necktie and twisted it in his hands while the pace made his knees slip. Remus put his arm around Sirius’ midsection once again while the other hand splayed on his back and held him down into the pillows.

The thigh highs began to bunch from all the movement and Remus slowed, reaching down to adjust them while Sirius clenched and unclenched his hands, mumbling out a string of pleas in English and French alike. Remus stilled for a moment and kissed the side of his neck as he relished in the heat.

“Move,” Sirius moaned, pushing back weakly. “Please, please move.”

“I love you so much,” Remus said into his sweat-slick skin as he started again, angling up on each thrust as he lifted Sirius’ hips into the right spot. “I do, baby. And I can’t wait to have two whole days to ourselves so I can admire those pretty bruises all over you.”

“Lemme—lemme see you. S’il vous plait, mon amour, I wanna see you.”

“Alright, shhh.” Remus combed a hand through his hair and untied his wrists; they were a bit pink from all the pulling, but otherwise looked fine. He gently pushed on Sirius’ shoulder so he could roll over and was met with glassy silver eyes and lips bitten so red they almost matched his socks. “Bonjour. Do you want me to tie you up?”

“Non.” Sirius smiled and pulled him down for a slow kiss, and Remus could feel his heartbeat hammering against his shoulder. “Je t’aime.”

“Je t’aime,” he murmured back as he lined himself up again. Sirius’ eyes fell shut with a moan when Remus pushed in and he inhaled deeply, winding one leg with Remus’ and letting the other splay to the side.

“There, there, there,” he pleaded, grasping for a hold on Remus’ arms as his eyes flickered between open and shut. “Oh, fuck, je veux—je veux—”

“Do you think you deserve to come?” Sirius made a conflicted noise and pressed his knee into Remus’ thigh, only for Remus to pull it straight once more; the sock rolled down with each rocking movement. “Sirius, look at me. Do you want to come?”

It took a moment before Sirius made eye contact with him and nodded, struggling to get enough breath to speak. “Yes.”

“You were so rude earlier, but I did make you wait a long time.” Remus thought for a second, but didn’t slow his brutal pace that made Sirius turn his face into the pillows. “Can you come like this?”

“Touch me—touch me please—”

Remus lifted his lower back up and ran his teeth along Sirius’ pulse point, then wrapped a hand around his dick and jerked him quick and tight until high, incoherent sounds slipped through his lips. “Now.”

Sirius nearly kicked him in the shin as he arched his back, mouth falling open, moans muffled in the hollow of Remus’ throat. He babbled some string of whimpered words, caught between pushing Remus away and pulling him closer until their warm skin pressed across his entire front and his knees bumped together over the small of Remus’ back.

Remus followed him a moment later, sliding his mouth along Sirius’ collarbone before he came so hard his arms shook with it. A soft hand trailing through his hair brought him back to earth, though Sirius still looked dazed and shuddered every few seconds as Remus stroked a hand down his cheek and slid the thigh-highs back up with the other. “Shh, mon amour. Ça va, chérie, respire. Je t’aime tellement. ”

Sirius smiled and kissed him again, holding him close and warm as he pulled out. “I love it when you speak French,” he murmured. “Si beau.”

“Happy Valentine’s Day.” Their quiet laughter buzzed against his chest and he littered Sirius’ face with kisses until his silver eyes cleared. “Are your wrists alright?”

With a heavy sigh, he let go of Remus and held them up. “All good.”

He kissed those, too, for good measure. “And the rest of you?”

Sirius raised an eyebrow. “I think you achieved your goal.”

“Which one?”

“There is no way I’m going to be able to walk straight.”

Remus hid his laughter in Sirius’ neck and rolled to the side, gathering him into his arms. “It’s a good thing we have all weekend, then.” He checked the clock and sighed. “I should make dinner soon.”

“No.”

“No? I’m not allowed to make us food?”

“Nope.”

“But that’s my present for you.”

“Your present to me is currently on my thighs and won’t disappear in half an hour.” He felt Sirius smile and nuzzle closer, then gentle pressure on his neck.

“What are you doing?”

“Payback.” Sirius rolled him onto his back and began speckling his neck and shoulders with small love bites, outlining his ribs with featherlight touches. Remus reached down and snapped the edge of his thigh high. “Hey!”

He grinned. “Couldn’t resist. You’re going to keep these, right?”

“Duh.” Sirius wound their legs together and cuddled into Remus’ side. “Mmm, you are so warm.”

Remus wrapped both arms around him and kissed the top of his head, closing his eyes. Naptime sounded good. Naptime, then dinner, then back to bed for more snuggles, or maybe something more. It was Valentine’s Day, after all.

-------------------------------

The Next Morning

The first thing Sirius saw when he woke up was gray. The second was Remus’ shocked face, followed by an ‘oh, fuck’.

“What’s wrong?” he asked, propping himself on his elbows with a wince. His backside ached from yesterday’s activities, and his thighs were still incredibly sensitive—he noted that the matching rings of hickeys had not diminished much overnight with a sense of satisfaction. Remus was staring down at his phone as rain drizzled softly outside.

Wait. Rain.

Silently, Remus passed him the phone. Sirius squinted at the screen, blinking the drowsiness out of his eyes, then froze.

Hello team,

Due to improved weather conditions and snow melt, practice today has been rescheduled for 4 pm. Thank you for your flexibility.

Best,

A. Weasley

“Oh, fuck.”

212 notes · View notes

beigehearts · 4 years

Text

The Price of Self Respect

this is part one of a series of yandere chrollo x fem!reader. this story will contain explicit content. Warnings at the beginning of the chapter. Please send me requests if you wish to for hxh characters and scenarios! ❤

PART I Read part two here! CW: mentions of death, murder, and gore 1,730 words

____________________________________________

It had been many days since you had received an assignment as a hunter. At this point you would have taken a request to open a pickle jar. You had an agent who sourced your jobs through to you that way no one could know your identity. Your agent barely knows your identity outside of your phone number. While you are no where near as infamous as the Zoldyck Family- you definitely are not unknown. “The Creator” is what most people would refer to you as- quite fitting for your ability. Specialists are not as scarce as people make them out to be; a specialist who utilizes their ability as best as they can is scarce. You conjure a pencil, and you can draw anything into existence. Your nen concentrates in your hand and you can create life (or at least a husk of life). Drawing animals or weapons, even humans (who aren’t quite sentient) earned you your high respect as a hunter.

You gaze out of the window at the quiet streets of a city you’ve never travelled to. While the hotel is large and towers over the town, it is probably the biggest building for miles. Bzzzz. You turn towards your bed and see your phone screen is lit up. Picking up the phone you see a single message from the only saved number on your phone. York New. 14:00. 1278 Pearl Street. G Watanabe- Room 207. You scroll down to see the status of the person. Alive. Wanted Dead. 7 Days. Employer ---

A smile graced your lips knowing that you finally have a job. While town hopping and sight seeing for the past few weeks was a nice rst, you can’t just halt your income. You enjoy your job anyway so the money is a bonus. Ill pack in the morning you think to yourself, once you land in York New you may have some extra time to research your target.

The plane ride was smooth and quite comforting- you paid for first class. While you could use your hunter card to be priority seating, it leaves a trace of where you’ve been. Plus, you’ll be getting paid soon enough and the 12 hour plane ride in first class would be nothing compared to the fat check that would be wired to your account. Murder is expensive you know.

Stepping out of the taxi, the driver gets out and opens the trunk for you. You grab your one small backpack filled with nothing but snacks- drawn snacks are not particularly tasty. Just because you can create it doesn’t mean it’s true to the real deal. You jog towards the doors, fat rain drops assaulting you meanwhile. You get your room key under for the room you reserved under an alias and make your way to the elevator. You press the button to go up and when the elevator reaches your floor it sounds a satisfying ‘ding’ and the doors open almost soundlessly. You stepped into the confined space and to your surprise a man steps in with you. You hadn’t even sensed him nearby, it seemed as if he just popped into reality.

He’s tall, is the first thing you think when you look at him. Not necessarily tall as in feet wise (though he definitely had quite a few inches on you) but his aura and the way he carried himself made it seem as if he towered you. The corner of his lips turn upwards and suddenly he doesn’t seem so intimidating. It’s as if he was dragged back down to earth.

“Good morning, awful weather it seems.” The man says with a chuckle. You take a moment to drink in all of him. His black hair is somewhat messy, a middle part with water dripping down a few strands. A bandage is wrapped around his forehead and you wonder if it’s an injury or a fashion statement. A large fur coat cover most of his body, you’re only able to capture a glimpse of a white button up shirt at his neck.

“Terrible. My flight almost had an emergency landing.” You groan, recalling your annoyance when the captain announced this over the speakers.

“Ah so you just got in today? I got into York New about a week ago. What are you here for?”

Your eyes travel to his and you notice that they’re unusually large while seeming to only make him more attractive. “I’m on a work trip, though I shouldn’t be here long.” His lips stretch a little further into something of a grin, “What a coincidence, I’m here on business as well.”

The elevator dings and you give a quick goodbye, not necessarily because you didn’t like talking to him but because you wanted to take a nice warm shower. You sashay out of the elevator, and the back of your neck tingles, you can tell that his eyes are boring into your back.

You drop your bag onto your bed and wander over to the mirror. Looking at you in the mirror is yourself. Though you never seem to recognize this person as you. You pose in different angles but can’t find one that makes you like yourself. You grab the chub of your stomach and groan hopelessly. A world renown hunter who has killed the unkillable is staring at herself in the mirror and grimacing. You remind yourself that you’re one of the strongest specialists out there and you shouldn’t be critiquing yourself.

A day passed and your deadline is growing nearer. You draw your outfit for the day, and put on the jeans, hoodie, and heels that were super comfortable thanks to your nen. An assassin has to look good as well as kill. Your rented car waits for you in the hotel garage and when you finally make your way down there, you do a onceover of the car. There are no signs of foul play, tracking, or marking so you hop into the drivers seat comfortably. Once the car is started your phone buzzes.

+ $2000 to your account message attached: get his pass for the auction and send it to client

You nod to yourself, you had completely forgotten about the auction. Of course you were supposed to kill a member of the mafia during the auction. How could you not have made that connection. While you are intelligent, you wouldn’t say you’re smart. Once you arrive at the hotel your target is staying at, you book a room despite the fact you will not be using it for long. In the hotel room you draw a dress that makes you look like a model, all you need is to look good and your nen for this mission, this goes for most missions.

Each minute on the clock seems to last hours, you need to leave at 01:30, in order to complete your mission at 2. This is the part you hate the most, laying on the hotel bed listening to the clock tick and tick and tick. It feels almost like the clock is mocking you, and sometimes you want to just break it. Though despite this you lay on the bed staring at the ceiling, counting down every minute until the clock strikes 1:30.

The last mocking tick sound rings and you get up quickly. Walking confidently out of the room and down the large and foolishly elegant hall. You make your way to the elevators where you had a run in with that man and go down to the second floor seeing as you were residing on the fourteenth. The second floor was reserved for the mafia only, many families used this hotel to be near the auction.

The elevator opens up and you examine the hall. It is much different than the one where your room is. Lights are dimmer and the color pallet of the hall was that of red and black where as yours was blue and white. You step out onto the marble floors and your heels click against the cold surface. Something’s not right. Something is very wrong, very out of place. You can smell it. The smell of blood.

207 is closer to the end of the hallway than it is to the elevators. The lights are completely off at the end of the hallway as well. With each step towards the room of your target the lights get dimmer until there is no light. You halt and look at the room with gold numbers on it stating ‘207′. The door is cracked and you approach it cautiously. You push the door open and see your target laying on the ground in hundreds of pieces, it’s a bloody mess.

A man stands in front of the window that is the entire wall, his form dark. Now the only sound present is that of the rain pounding against the glass of the window. He turns towards you, and you quickly recognize the large fur jacket. It’s the man from the elevator, his coat is open and he’s shirtless, but covered in blood. His forehead is uncovered by the bandage that was on him previously, revealing a purple cross. His demeanor is still friendly and inviting but something is different about his eyes.

He smiles and for some reason you feel drawn to him, so you take a step forward. “I’ve been waiting y/n.”

You swallow any sense of fear you have and nod, “Oh you have?”

“Of course, I thought I would make your job easier for you.” He chuckles just like he did in the elevator, as if he didn’t just commit an atrocity. But who are you to judge? “Don’t worry, I’ll still be paying you every jenny of what was promised.”

Your head cocks to the side “So you’re my client?” He nods in response.

“And I got his pass to the auction so I would say you did a pretty good job of completing your mission.” He waves the pass at you as proof.

“Can I have the pleasure of knowing your name since you know mine?” You question.

He nods again, “Chrollo is my name. You were commissioned by the spiders.”

The spiders... It quickly clicks in your head. The phantom troupe. Which means, in front of you stands the leader of the Phantom Troupe.

“It’s nice to meet you Chrollo.”

#chrollo #yandere chrollo #phantom troupe #hxh #hunterxhunter #chrolloxreader #chrollo x y/n #chrollo x you #yandere #yandere hxh #chrollo lucilfer

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marshmallow-phd · 4 years

Text

Scarlet Moon

Genre: Scarlet Heart Ryeo!AU, Time Travel!AU, Alternate History, Royalty!AU

Pairing: OC x EXO OT9

Summary: This isn’t Gwen’s time. She was from the modern era, with technology and electricity. But during a solar eclipse, she’s transported back into a previous life in a time and place she does not know. Now, as the foreign daughter of a merchant living in a prince’s household, she must tread carefully, watch her back, and guard her heart. But with the princes locked in a battle over the throne, the chances of her making it out alive might disappear.

Part: 1 I 2 I 3

********

The paper sliced across the skin before any action could be taken to avoid it. A high pitched hiss followed by a short whine. The flap of skin that had been separated was being dyed red.

Gwen stuck her index finger in her mouth to sooth the stinging. It helped a little bit. Still sucking on the appendage, Gwen stumbled over to the supply closet and opened the thin metal doors with the other hand. She kept this feat up as she opened the first aid kit and pushed around the different types of bandages, trying to decide which one to use. The cut was right on the tip, right where you never want it to be. It was hard to get a band aid on that kind of cut. Eventually, she found a smaller version of a standard design and ripped the paper covering opening. She wrapped the band aid around her index finger before heading for her desk. It was back to the files that had injured her in the first place.

The pile was tall; by her standards, at least. Gwen had been dealing with it for the past hour. The dates on the files needed sorting, separating the ones could be sent to long-term storage. She almost gave out another whine, but she didn’t want the others to hear and start the relentless teasing. Her coworkers were quick and very witty.

It was a friendly floor. Everyone joked and played around without the fear of feelings being hurt. If Gwen didn’t have to do the actual work that came with the office space, she wouldn’t mind staying here forever. But dealing with these files and demanding customers and meeting quotas was not what she wanted to do for the rest of her life. Not that Gwen knew exactly what it was that she did want to do. She’d tried a lot of things over the last few years in her slow going college years. Marketing, history, education - hell, she even took several makeup courses and skincare lessons that focused on natural resources. None of it stuck, none of it held her interest, though the information could be recalled if needed.

“You alright there, Gwen?”

Drudging up from the bowels of her thoughts, Gwen looked up at Kimberly, who had stopped at her desk on the way back from the printer.

“Yeah,” Gwen nodded with a sigh. “Just… ready for the week to be over.”

“Ain’t that the consensus,” Kimberly laughed.

“How are the dogs?” Gwen was seizing the opportunity to distract herself from work. Kimberly owned two dogs with opposite personalities. One was the well-mannered older brother, the other was the skittish, hyper younger brother. She loved to talk about them and there was never a shortage of entertaining stories.

Kimberly rolled her eyes. “Kurt is back to back to demanding his breakfast at five a.m. Oh, but Kent now does this thing where he walks backwards. Whenever he starts doing that, we’ll beep at him. You know, like the garbage trucks? Then he gets all shy and hides his head.”

Gwen couldn’t stop giggling at the thought. “Oh, the poor thing!”

“You’ll have to see it next time you come over.”

“I can’t wait.”

As Kimberly walked away, Gwen sighed. She didn’t get out too much and the humor that most of her socializing outside of work was with one of her coworkers wasn’t lost on her. Just another dart to throw at the board that was Gwen Sinclair.

It wasn’t like her life was a complete disaster. Really, it could have been worse. She could imagine a thousand different scenarios that she could be living right now that were worse off then her current situation. Truthfully, if glanced at from the outside, Gwen’s life was simply... mediocre. She was blessed with tolerable roommates, an okay job that provided a nice paycheck for a twenty-three-year-old who had yet to finish college. But… the loneliness was killing her and overall, she was craving for something more.

She was exhausted from obligation and responsibility. She wished to go back to the days where she read about adventure and intrigue and imagined some day living that out herself. After having those words in her hands, she felt empty in her reality. Somehow, each day felt even more draining.

With the end of another workday, Gwen packed up the files that still needed to be sorted, locked up her cabinets and tugged on her coat as she waved goodbye to Kimberly and the others. A few other coworkers were chatting excitedly about the solar eclipse happening in a few minutes. Gwen, however, was annoyed. Annoyed at the fact that all anyone - online or in person - could talk about was the solar eclipse, as if it was the only one that had ever been seen in this generation. When one person mentioned the eclipse, it was fine. When it was every post and every comment and every conversation, it felt a little ridiculous. Gwen couldn’t care less about the event. Getting home was her current priority. But escaping wasn’t that easy.

For the millionth time, Gwen rolled her eyes as she scrolled through the newsfeed, waiting for her car to warm up in the parking garage. The weather was cold and dreary, slowing down her progress on getting home. Puffs of steam escaped her lips in the below freezing temperature. Other employees hurried past the back of her car to get to their own tiny sanctuaries. An alert for a new email popped up at the top of the phone screen. From the quick scan of the notification, she saw that it was from her eastern history professor. He wanted to go over the latest paper from class. Oh, no. That was never a good sign.

Gwen huffed, threw her car into reverse, and pulled out of the parking space. First the papercut, now this.

Since all her classes were online, Gwen had the minor luxury to not be forced to talk to her professor face to face, which surely would have been humiliating. But it couldn’t be avoided completely. She’d email him back once she arrived home. Or maybe she’d put it off until tomorrow. Dealing with this was the last thing she wanted to do. Stress was already causing her skin to revert back to puberty, she didn’t need this as well.

Her phone rang and she struggled to answer it while carefully winding down the levels of the garage. It was Jaynie, the favorite of the roommates.

“Hey, Janie, what’s up?”

“Oh, nothing, I was just wondering if you were coming straight home today.”

Gwen smirked, knowing exactly where this was going.

Over the past several months, a bit of an obsession had developed with Korean dramas. The shows the two of them consumed were different from the same old, boring American television and there were years worth of stories to choose from. Currently, they were in the middle of another romantic comedy. While Gwen loved the storyline and was in a constant state of swoon, as soon as the credits started rolling, she was reminded how pathetically uninteresting her life was. But those sixty plus minutes of pure escapism made it all worth the crash that came afterwards.

Gwen tried to wait patiently in the line to leave the parking garage, but her frustration was getting the better of her. It was stop and go, stop and go, stop and go.

“I’m planning on it. That is, if people decide any day now to not drive idiotically.”

“Ugh, I had the same problem on my way home.”

Curious. Both of them worked in the downtown area. “How did you get home so fast?” Gwen asked.

“I got off a little early today.”

“Lucky.” Her accounting job often led to flexible hours. Gwen was jealous of that level of freedom.

The road was slick from the freezing rain. Weather like this brought out all the stupid drivers as if this wasn’t a yearly occurrence. She was careful to look both ways before exiting the garage and inching into the street. What she didn’t account for was the other emptying lot across the street. A large black SUV pulled out right at the same time, but went too fast, hitting the water that was slowly turning to ice on the asphalt.

With no time to react, the SUV slammed into the side of Gwen’s compact car. Glass from the driver’s side window shattered and sprayed her face. Her phone flew out of her hand. The crunch of metal hit her ears before she could fully process what had happened. With the force of the collision, her forehead slammed against the steering wheel before the airbag deployed. The sound of screams echoed around her, but the words were unintelligible. Slumped over in her seat, a shadow creeped over the scene. Through the slits of her barely open eyes, Gwen watched as the sun disappeared behind the moon. Then all went black.

********

The water was what brought her back. It filled her lungs and surrounded her on all sides. She flailed her limbs, desperate for traction that couldn’t be found. Her clothing weighed her down, the hems being pulled as if hands had gripped tight on them. She needed a miracle. And a miracle she got. Two hands held onto one of her wrists and pulled her to the surface.

She gasped for air as her rescuer struggled to bring her to shore. The cloth that covered her felt as if it weighed a hundred pounds, making it nearly impossible to move. Water made its way up her throat, spilling over her lips. Her lungs were finally clear. They took in as much oxygen as they were allowed, burning with each brath.

“Lady Gwen! Lady Gwen!”

A young girl blocked out the bright sun. She shook Gwen’s shoulders desperately.

Gwen’s brain processed that the girl was not speaking English, but… she could understand her. The girl’s damp, dark hair was pulled into halves on either side of her face held in place by wide red straps. She looked at Gwen with deep concern, like a lifelong friend. But Gwen was sure she had never seen this girl before in her life.

“My Lady, can you hear me?” she asked frantically.

“Who are you?” Gwen finally choked out.

That made the girl pause in her panic. “What?”

Slowly regaining her strength, Gwen pushed herself up to her knees. As her eyesight cleared, she took in her surroundings. Gone were the tall metal and glass buildings, traffic lights, and speeding cars of her modern home. Now all that surrounded her were trees and a sandy beach of a large, calm lake. In the distance, wooden houses with curved rooftops, painted in bright reds and greens dotted the horizon. The heaviness that weighed her down was a dress made of too many layers and of no western fashion that she’d ever experienced before.

Whispers bounced around the rocky shore. All the faces that were looking on with concern around were unfamiliar. Gwen grabbed the hair cascading down her back, but it was still the red she knew, darker from the dampness of being pulled out of the water but still her hair.

“Where am I?” she asked in a quiet, gasping voice.

“My Lady, don’t you remember?” The girl panicked. “You’re in Songak. Goryeo.”

“Goryeo?” Gwen screeched. All the minor details she could summon up of the country came rushing to the forefront of her mind. It was information overload and her brain couldn’t handle it. Her lungs tried desperately to keep up, breathing in as much air as they could, but her throat was closing up from the panic. The landscape blurred and she fell to the ground.

********

She was in a bed this time when she regained consciousness. The room was cold and dimly lit with soft, orange candlelight. A man, Caucasian unlike the others, sat beside the bed on a stool, worry etched into every facet of his face.

“Gwen, sweet, are you all right?”

English. He was speaking English. But that was a footnote of comfort to the bigger problem. She still didn’t know what had happened to her or how she got here or who these people were that seemed to know her. The man, who was about in his mid-forties with salt and pepper hair, smiled down at her, though his eyes were confused. “Gwen, does it hurt anywhere? Can you tell me if you hit your head?”

Gwen took a moment, to calm down and to evaluate what she was feeling physically. Her head didn’t hurt, nor did any other part of her body. Wordlessly, she shook her head. The man seemed relieved.

“Are you all right?” He asked again, a different meaning under the question this time. “Chae Ryung said you couldn’t remember her or that we were in Goryeo? Do you at least remember your papa?”

Gwen weighed the choices in her mind. There wasn’t a mirror around, but she started to wonder if she had taken the place of someone else. Someone who knew these strangers. She could say that she didn’t know any of them - the truth - but would they think her mad if she spilled too much? Perhaps she could say she remembered a few things. Like him, if he is this poor girl’s father. Why am I here? In this time?

Choosing to comprise with herself, she gave the smallest of nods. “Papa.” Sitting up, she pulled him into a hug and there was something comforting about his embrace. This body remembered him, at least.

“What happened?” she asked after she let go.

“Chae Ryung said that you’d wandered off again and she found you, you’d been the water a long time.” The man, Papa, sucked in a breath, his eyes beginning to water. His genuine concern over her wellbeing made Gwen choke up as well. “The doctor said you stopped breathing. That could explain your lost memories.”

Good. The excuse was already in her hands. That should make it easy enough to play along while being forgiven for any missteps. But they shouldn’t be in Goryeo. That didn’t make any sense, historically. If anything, they might have been in Joseon – late Joseon. Was this some sort of alternate timeline? Or maybe she hit her head really hard in the car crash and this is really all a dream from the stress of her paper and too much K-drama.

Yes. Too much K-drama.

That had to be the explanation. This was all a strange dream. Which meant, she could play along and not be afraid. She could ask questions and live out the day until she woke back up in her own time, most likely in a hospital with a bandage on her head and her mother fretting over her.

She glanced around the room, taking in the architecture that she had only ever seen in pictures. In person, it was even more stunning and intricate. This wasn’t an ordinary citizen’s home. Interesting. What else could her brain come up with? “Why are we in Goryeo?”

“Your father’s a merchant, remember?” He spoke slowly. Each word was deliberate, giving Gwen time to process. Good filler for her mind. “I made a large fortune here and planned on taking you back home, but… your mother is buried here. We couldn’t leave her behind.”

A wave of emotion hit out of nowhere. Though her mother was alive and well, it didn’t stop a tear from escaping. “Mama.”

Papa wiped it away with a coarse finger. Gwen gasped back, surprised by the realness of the touch. Her dreams were never this intricate. The blanket strone across her lap scrunched in her fingers. It was cold and soft… and very real.

She wasn't dreaming, was she?

Confused by her reaction, Papa paused for a moment before continuing his explanation. “The eighth prince is graciously letting us stay with him while we wait on the construction of our home to be complete.”

The eighth prince?

Panic grew tenfold. If this wasn’t a dream, then she was in very big trouble. If history told her one thing, it was that proximity to royalty was the most dangerous place to be. Gwen might possibly have been able to skate by if they were simply staying in some unknown village far from the capital, but they were in a prince’s home. Which meant they were in… Songak, the capital city, just like that girl – Chae Ryung – had said. Right under the King’s nose. Breathing became difficult again. Each one was shallow, barely letting in any oxygen. Gwen could feel her chest tighten and her vision blurred.

“Gwen!” Papa jumped up and tried to keep her straight to give her lungs as much room as possible. He switched to Korean as he called out over his shoulder, “Someone, get the doctor! Now!” Shuffling sounds echoed off the floor on the other side of the sliding door and then faded away.

A minute later, breathing no better, two men and a woman rushed inside along with Chae Ryung. The older man stepped in front of Papa and took his place. He pushed Gwen’s shoulders gently until she was lying down. Two cold fingers against her wrist checked her pulse. The other, much younger man stepped up to Papa.

“What happened?”

Papa frowned. “It seems she’s lost some of her memories. I was explaining why we were here when suddenly she had trouble breathing.” He stopped, struggling with his own breath. “I’m sorry we’ve become a burden to you, Your Highness.”

Gwen’s breathing was regaining strength and she was able to concentrate on the conversation. So that was the eighth prince. He was younger than she would have guessed, handsome even, if she had to focus on something other than her lack of breath.

“Do not think such a thing,” the Eighth Prince replied. “Your presence has greatly improved the household. Lady Gwen will get better with time.”

Papa bowed, obviously grateful at the response. He turned to the woman. “Lady Hae, may I enquire after your own health?”

“Today is a better day,” she smiled, though her pale, drained complexion said otherwise. “Please, don’t worry about me. Keep your thoughts for your daughter.”

The doctor released Gwen’s wrist, satisfied with the improvement of her pulse and breathing. He stood up.

“It was a mild panic attack,” the doctor said calmly to Papa. “If it happens again, she should lie down and focus on her breathing. The incident at the lake seems to have taken a toll on her body. She simply needs rest. In time, her memories and her body will recover.”

Gwen didn’t agree with that statement fully. This body might get better in time, but there was no way memories that didn’t exist would ever return. One by one, the occupants left the room until it was only Gwen and Papa remaining behind. Silence hung in the air. After a moment, Papa sat down on the stool and took Gwen’s hand.

“I was worried I had lost you,” he whispered.

Gwen’s eyes fell down to the blanket covering her legs. Things were becoming clearer to her now. This was not a dream and she was no longer Gwen Sinclair from the twenty-first century. Something must have happened. She didn’t know what exactly had occurred or what would happen now, but she was here. And little did this man – known only to her as “Papa” – know that he had indeed lost his daughter. The face may be the same, but the Gwen inside was different. She would try her best to be good to him, at least until she found a way to get back to her own family. She gave his hand a reassuring squeeze.

********

The next morning, the doctor, along with the Eighth Prince, came back to check on Gwen. The doctor commented that her pulse was stronger and that she seemed well on the road to full health. However, he still insisted on keeping her on bedrest.

Bored with these same walls and too curious about her temporary home, Gwen sat up. If she was going to be here for a while, she might as well get to know it. “I’m fine. Please, don’t make me stay in here all day. The sun and air is good for you, isn’t it?”

The sudden rebelliousness against the doctor’s suggestion did not seem to sit well with any of them. Gwen gave Papa a pleading look. A father couldn’t resist those eyes. He sighed, turning to the doctor. “Perhaps, a little exercise in walking around the grounds would be all right?”

The doctor looked reluctant, but he agreed. “But she shouldn’t overexert herself.”

“Chae Ryung will stay with her,” the Eighth prince ordered. “If you’ll please excuse me, I must meet with my brothers.” He bowed and left, followed by the doctor.

Having heard her name from the hallway, Chae Ryung shuffled quickly inside and over to Gwen, holding out her arms for the latter to balance on as she slid off of the bed. “Are you sure you want to go outside?”

Gwen nodded. “Yes. Perhaps seeing more of this place will help jog my memory.”

Chae Ryung tilted her head. “How can your memory jog?”

Gwen snorted, both at Chae Ryung’s confusion and at herself for the slip of the modern phrase. ��Sorry, I just meant, maybe my memories will come back.”

“Oh.” The look on her face was enough to make Gwen laugh again.

Gwen scolded herself internally. She had to be more careful with her words. Every step was one on thin ice. She couldn’t change who she was, not completely, but she would have to pull back. Chae Ryung, however, felt safe, like a shelter from the rain. With her, Gwen could find answers that might be dangerous to seek elsewhere. Straightening her shoulders, Gwen smiled broadly and took her newest friend’s hand. Chase Ryung grinned brightly at her and guided her out of the room.

#exo royalty au #exo royalty!au #scarlet heart au #scarlet heart ryeo #exo time travel au #exo time travel!au #exo angst #exo series #exo x oc #exo x original character #exo ot9 #Scarlet Moon

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