#*gets cait sith in with pompoms*

[animus-inspire-archive]

1,5,16

1. What types of threads are your most favourite?

Something big, fat and juicy! Doesn’t have to be canon but something with lots of world-building or lore elements in it.

It’s been so long since I’ve done one so I’m rusty but I do like a bit of an action thread, especially if combined with above or a bit of emotional whumpage.

Something that allows for some banter between the muses is always good too!

5. What is your least favourite thing about your muse? What makes them difficult to write, or interact with?

See second point above, he’s not very prone to getting involved in action threads and a lot of what we tend to end up writing is introspection. Which, yanno, I love, but he’s not exactly a muse you can easily extrovert without the use of Cait Sith. Reeve uses his mind more in a lot of encounters and the guy is so much smarter than I am. That can be difficult to craft correctly, especially as I have so few spoons available to me these days.

Truth be told, if I was playing him entirely straight 100% IC along my headcanon lines, he would not be doing half as much with others as he is doing. But he grants me some leeway so I can get to writing with a wide variety of folks and exploring facets of his personality. He’s used to it, though he sometimes recoils at the more out-there or cracky interactions ;D

16. Does fandom intimidate you, or make you critical of your portrayal? Do you have any irrational doubts in what you are doing?

Not only am I old, but I’m also fandom old and been playing Reeve for so long that objectively I should’ve got to a point that I take some pride in my portrayal. And in some ways I do, but in many other ways I remain hyper-critical.

Quite a few evenings I sit down to write and just despise the look and sound of everything I produce. It’s embarrassing actually. I should definitely be past all this!

It’s generally thanks to an anxiety disorder that has been with me since childhood and having a personality type I have come to realise thrives on both receiving validation and encouraging others. So it’s less fandom itself, necessarily, even though I’ve never been particularly popular or highly regarded (I used to be more regarded which also contributes) - and that does niggle in doubts over the years.

I think out of fandom as a whole I have gotten most affected within the fic side of things - I actually orphaned most of my fics on my A03 account only last year, just because I was getting no comments and hardly any kudos etc. They weren’t unpopular characters or fandoms (most of it was Reeve and FFVII) and I don’t think I’m that terrible a writer or that my portrayal sucks, so I was pretty disheartened overall. I sort of regret that decision now.

I’ve come to realise I’m never going to be a popular ‘influencer’ writer or RPer so I am concentrating on what I think I am good at - which is someone who can craft some pretty amazing things with others whilst cheering them on, even if it has to be from the sidelines.