#*Personal

[brothersandtragedies]

My favourite part about RITE HERE RITE NOW was when everyone sat there in the dark for a moment after the last scene and someone then blurted "YOU MOTHERFUCKERS"

[s-krybe]

Finally got a new decoration

[mercurygray]

Made the mistake (choice?) of going to a networking event for work this evening. It was kind of poorly attended, and because it was at a local university, I ended up chatting with a bunch of students, which...would be fine, I guess. Except that it wasn't.

One of these students sees my name tag, and says "Oh, I've applied for a bunch of jobs there. They keep turning me down."

I express polite interest, as one does, and flannel a little bit about just because you're not the best candidate doesn't mean that you're a bad one. (We're a big organization. We hire for all kinds of things.) The student doesn't seem to be hearing what I'm saying and keeps complaining about this.

Except during the course of this conversation, it occurs to me that I do know him, and I do remember that he was a candidate for one of our jobs, and I do remember having a conversation with my team member about hiring him. I remember this because he emailed afterwards asking what would have made him a better candidate, and we gave him...half of an honest answer. We told him we would have liked to see more cash handling experience, which was true, and which (I am learning) he took very poorly because 'you can teach that in five minutes.'

True story. We can teach that in five minutes. However, in three minutes I've figured out that this kid has all the pleasant personality of a wet dishrag, and I've now remembered that was a VERY deciding factor about why we didn't hire him, because I cannot teach you how to be nice to people. I also remember talking about something he said during the interview about being at his job for some time and not seeking out additional responsibilities or learning anything new, and indeed turning down opportunities to do more. If you're complaining about being a bagger, but you've also never tried to learn how to be a cashier, and share openly in an interview that you 'didn't want that responsibility,' please know that might reflect badly on you when you apply for a job where selling things is a huge part of the role.

Also, the entire conversation has been him complaining at me. Which is a great first impression to make with someone.

Anyway, the moral of this story is that everyone should have a way to spin themselves in interviews, I will never look down on anyone who's worked retail unless you look down on yourself, and being pleasant is not a secret requirement for customer service.

Anyway, the two people we hired instead are working out great, and that's an hour of my life I won't get back but at least I had some cheese and crackers.

[donfermin]

Madrid

[zebrafiz]

watched a mouthwashing playthrough…. Anya… MY SHAYLAAAAA 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭

[romanreigns]

I'll post on this blog, too, I guess 🖤

[agreatandhonorablesoldier]

defeatist mindset is not catching me lacking, the fuck you mean they called texas before all but one of the major population hubs have reported? baby that's 12 million + people. it took til saturday in 2020, i'm not panicking today.

[brothersandtragedies]

I think the worst thing that has happened to me so far in BG3 is that I started to think Gortash is weirdly hot.

[timothyslucy]

i'm angry crying rn bc as always whenever trump or elon is on the news the rest of my family starts giggling like they're watching a stand up comedy special. super long rant i had to get out under the cut, sorry.

i fucking hate this. i hate them. i hate the family that i was born into. they all claim to be so loving and accepting of everyone when that has always been the furthest thing from the truth. they've all used the n-word more than once (everytime with a hard "r" too), and for my brothers it's a normal word in their everyday vocabulary. everytime immigration is brought up everyone raises a glass and yells, "send them back to where they came from!", and hmm.... "i don't have anything against anyone who's transgender, but they should not be switching genitals, that's wrong." for god's sake if we have a family movie night together, i have to go out of my way to make sure there are no queer couples at all, even for minor/background characters. all because it makes them that uncomfortable to watch two people of the same sex kissing- (seriously, everytime i've watched a gay kiss with them i can physically feel everyone else's buttholes in the room clenching. the tension is so palpable you'd think someone just died). which, in turn, sucks, because that means i can't be who i am either. i cannot claim that i'm bisexual because nobody (in my immediate family anyway) believes me, because and i quote, "don't have any dating experience" which.... wow. what a great way to kick me while i'm already down and depressed, by pointing out my very nonexistent dating history and bringing down the hopeless romantic i secretly keep hidden away from all of you. because if i didn't then that would just give them more ammo to make fun of me.

so i keep it hidden. i keep it hidden... that from the bottom of my heart i feel about as much for them as they do for me- which if you couldn't tell, isn't very much. i keep my disdain for all of them hidden as best i can, but i think they already know based off how many times they've told me i'm "evil" whenever i get worked up about these basic morals they're lacking.

i've always, always felt like an outsider from my family ever since i can remember. from a very young age i always felt like there was something differentiating between myself, my older brothers, and my parents, and it's all unfolding like the crashing tides.

i've been living with my mother for the past 5yrs, and idk if i'll ever get out from her grasp, but when i do i'm not sure how much i am going to want to do with her. i always knew she was conservative, i mean... she was born in 1964 to my grandparents who were very religious and instilled their narrowminded beliefs into their children, but ig i just foolishly always thought she was..... different and didn't actually believe all these horrible things, that have only just now come to light in trumps 2nd term of presidency.

i don't think i'm ever going to keep in contact with any of these people again if i ever find my way out of here (my mom's basement). i don't care how cold it sounds, i've never felt the proper familial attachment to my family members. my father is a physically/verbally abusive pos that i don't talk to anymore, my brothers are irish twins, and i wasn't born until about 7yrs down the line, and we have nothing. in common. their one and only interest? sports. if they're not watching football, then it's basketball, then it's baseball, then it's hockey (which they're not even that interested in?). just one game after another with absolutely nothing else in between. which is... fine ig??? i mean whatever floats your boat, but as someone who's more artsy i don't see how you wouldn't wanna palate your brain with something fictional... but anyway i'm getting off track.....

i guess i should learn not go upstairs when the 5 o'clock news isn't on. even for a simple glass of water.

[mercurygray]

Had an interesting experience this weekend with sharing writing and commenting.

I was staying with my DnD college friends this past weekend to play two different campaigns, our regular Curse of Strahd campaign and a stand-alone one-shot lead by a professional at the local game studio. My friends were all using characters they'd come up with for a previous one-shot at the same studio, but my character was new, so the pressure was on to make someone cool AND come up with a ton of lore for why this person joined the group. We were also playing at level twenty, which, for those of you who don't play DND, is basically the highest level there is. There would be a lot of lore to get there.

Anyway, at the end of the session I really wanted to do more with the character, so I wrote a few hundred words about her returning home after they'd taken out The God At The End Of The Universe.

And then I wanted someone to read it. Which meant asking my RL friends while they were still in the room with me. Which felt very, very pushy, even though it was…maybe a page and a half long. But I was sharing because I enjoyed the one-shot, and I wanted to keep building the story, which I don't always get to do in DnD.

I haven't shared any of my writing with a RL friend in a long time - I did it once in…high school, maybe, and the reaction was…not great. Anyway, none of the people who recognize me in crowded rooms have read anything of mine in a very, very long time, and it's kind of conditioned in my head that people who know me in person do not read things I have written, at all, ever. Some of that is because it's fandom adjacent, and RL friends are not people I talk fandom with, but most, I think, is just another invisible rule I have: Writing is for the internet and the internet only, for ever and ever, amen.

So what do you do when the internet isn't going to understand what you wrote? You ask the RL friends who were there.

Two of them (a some-time writer and a visual artist, both with some flavor of neurospicy) read it and gave me a 'oh, that was fun' comment and moved on to the next thing. (It was late. Maybe I could have picked a better time. They read it to be nice, and they did read it.)

The third friend (who is the only one I've talked with extensively about fandom, and writing, is also a writer herself, and with whom I'd shared some angst about not being able to write recently) read it, reacted in the middle of reading with an 'Oh, I love this line!', laughed out loud at something from the campaign, said she loved how I set a secondary character up, and generally expressed appreciation for how it was written.

Anyway, I thought it was a nice analogue for sharing writing online. It is nerve-wracking to share something new, especially if you've never done it before. Sometimes setting expectations for where you're at with your writing and what you want from it is helpful. Not everyone has the same vocabulary for giving comments, but getting those specific feedback beats on what you liked specifically is amazing. We can't hear laughter in a typed comment unless you tell us it was there. At the end of the day, we are all just slightly lonely human beings who are looking for connections and if you liked it, we'd like to know.

[thedeadthree]

hello besties and moots if yall would like our rooks to be friends or somethingg that wouldn’t be too shabby 🥀👁️🤧🥹

[ghiirahiims]

i wish ghirahim was in totk 😔

[zebrafiz]

finding out someone you used to be mutuals with blocked you for some unknown reason is like julius caesar finding out brutus organized his murder

[aureatchi]

REV i need u to drop the lore abt the fyozai x reverie academia!au NOW 🙏🙏!!!!!

OKAY FINEE, here’s a brief !! summary of the academia!au bcz guess what’s (maybe) going to be written someday ;)

first of all this was all inspired by this one artist on twt who drew uni!au bsd characters; i saw fyodor’s first months ago & when i saw the info i was like I’D STILL FALL IN LOVE W/ SOMEONE LIKE HIM 😭 (btw here’s dazai’s for you + since he’s relevant too) + ofc it’s SO OBVIOUS THEY WOULD BE ACADEMIC RIVALS.

think: prestigious uni + academic vibes galore ofc !! def fall/winter setting. & you’re STRUGGLING with russian. chose to take it bcz you needed an xtra class & just wanted to appear studious :’) but ofc it was way harder than it seemed & you lowk regret it now !! backtrack btw, you’re competing w/ this one brunette all your friends r acquainted with (ada ensemble) for top of the class, & it kind of pisses you off bcz he NEVER studies & likes to tease you all day, but he still gets perfect scores. anyways, you like to study in the library. tht’s how you meet fyodor—a new transfer student—who also pisses you off !! bcz he sees you struggling & mocks you for it & says it’s so easy (duh cz it’s his native tongue).

then you decide to join the chess club and to your luck, both of them are there too !! you suspected fyodor would probably be interested, so he didn’t surprise you, but you were shocked with dazai, bcz again…he did not look like someone who would to you. but how wrong you were, about him, about fyodor—everything, once you got to know them better.

oh & btw it’s all three of you competing now ofc. and trust the dynamic here is SO IMPORTANT, (♟️ is so important !! in our dynamic in gen actually; it’s like if you ever read ‘if we were villains’ & you know how SHAKESPEARE was so important to their plot...😬) honestly i said too much but tht’s what i can summarize for now HAHA

[callowaysss]

little veilguard rant (nothing spoilery just graphics/computer things) below.

so, the game looks AMAZING, the issue is that since i have an intel graphics card the game just constantly has this lighting issue where bright spaces look like... they have these weird blinding white lights shining constantly in the background??

example here featuring my own rook: mina laidir.

it makes the game really difficult to play because i can't see where i'm supposed to go (i'm currently in the prologue after crossing the eluvian) and i keep falling off of cliffs lol.

i hope maybe someone releases a mod to fix it or something bc i doubt intel will and idk when the devs will patch it. i heard maybe turning off the bloom will help but i like the bloom look so i'm just going to sit here and wait until i can fix it.