#* mew mew kissy cutie enthusiast. ;; ( alphys )

[apostrophe--dog-blog]

take a tag dump i guess. i still cant believe im actually making this damn blog

[scribble-hell]

Undertale September Day 17: Mew Mew Kissy Cutie Enthusiast, Alphys

I put way too much work into the background of this, but it was pretty fun anyway. Now the question we all need to ask is whether she's actually working, or blogging about Mew Mew Kissy Cutie discourse?

[smells-like-mettaton]

Oh yeah I never posted this. Last chapter of Alphys's saga of bad dates! Featuring an Alphyne date that is actually good! It can be read out of context of the rest of the fic if you want. (Rated T for Alphys's thoughts)

---

Under the dark cloak of night, the beach didn’t seem that different from Waterfall.

Stars sparkled like crystals overhead. Waves crashed rhythmically. The sound was similar to the flowing water of the Underground, yet completely new.

The smells were the most different. The stagnant stench of the garbage dump was replaced by fresh, salty air.

Yeah, this was definitely a better place for a date. She just hoped she wouldn’t ruin it by being… well, herself.

“I’m a d-delight,” she reminded herself, echoing Papyrus’s training. The claws of her feet still kneaded nervously in the sand. “Undyne c-cares about me. We’re going to have a great time, and nothing b-bad is going to happen.”

“Heck yeah!!” Undyne suddenly picked her up by the waist and spun her around.

Alphys shrieked. She swore she’d lost ten HP just from the scare.

“Undyne!” she said, trying to catch her breath. Her friend’s warm arms around her didn’t exactly help. “Wh-when did you get here?”

“Just now!” She grinned and set Alphys back on her feet. “Sorry I’m late. Papyrus had some last minute dating advice for me.”

Alphys scanned Undyne’s outfit, noting the MTT-Brand Fashion Basketballs (For Wearing, Not Playing)™ attached to her shoulders. The rubbery material looked ready to split from the size of Undyne’s biceps. It was a little distracting, but, not necessarily in a bad way? At least it reminded Alphys that she could look silly and it wouldn’t ruin their friendship, or their date.

“Heh, you like ‘em?” Apparently noticing Alphys staring, Undyne flexed—and the basketballs exploded.

Alphys ducked, narrowly dodging a flaming piece of debris.

“A-are they supposed to do that?” she asked.

“Y’know, I’m not actually sure,” Undyne admitted with a thoughtful frown. “It looked cool as hell though, right??”

Her voice sounded strangely nervous. Alphys was probably just projecting.

“It did!” Alphys agreed enthusiastically, and not just because she had a big gay crush on her.

Well. A little bit because of her big gay crush. But also the literally-flaming edges of Undyne’s tank top were really hot. Literally and metaphorically. Wait, was admiring Undyne’s hot shirt included in her big gay crush?

“Y-you’re still on fire,” she finally thought to point out.

Undyne looked down at her shoulders and cursed. Then she ran directly into the ocean.

“Undyne!” Alphys chased after her, shivering when the cold water splashed over her feet. She hiked up the hem of the pink dress Mettaton had helped her pick out.

She hadn’t planned to actually get wet during their romantic walk on the beach, but she should’ve known better. Not that she needed to swim out and rescue Undyne! Undyne was perfectly capable of putting out her fire herself… probably. How many times had she burned down her house, again? Alphys would need to install some heavy-duty sprinkler systems whenever they got their own (separate!) homes on the surface. Right now she and most of her friends were still living out of a small RV at the bottom of Mount Ebott.

That was another reason Alphys had been looking forward to this date. Just her, Undyne, and the quiet beach. Maybe it would even be like the beach special of Mew Mew Kissy Cutie where Mew Mew and Raine snuck out at night and—

“Whew!” Undyne burst from the waves, flinging droplets of saltwater at Alphys in the process. Alphys tried to dry her glasses on her sleeve, but the tulle material only smeared the water further. “That was a close one! Thanks, Alphy!”

“Y-you’re welcome.” She grinned nervously, putting her glasses back on her face.

Maybe it was better that she couldn’t see Undyne clearly through her smudged lenses. Undyne was wringing water out of her red ponytail, and her sleeveless shirt and jeans clung to her wet figure, and suddenly Alphys wasn’t cold at all.

“If it weren’t for you, my whole shirt might’ve burned off!” Undyne grinned and clapped Alphys on the shoulder.

Alphys made some kind of sound in between a laugh and a panicked shriek.

“That! Would’ve been h-horrible!” She clapped her palms to her cheeks as if she was horrified on Undyne’s behalf, and not just trying to hide her cherry-red blush.

“Eh, it wouldn’t have been the first time.” Undyne shrugged. “But, uh, I guess that would’ve been awkward for the whole date, thing…”

Undyne bit her lip, looking down at her soggy outfit. It looked like she’d left her boots further down the beach, at least. Though that might’ve been just a few pieces of driftwood. Alphys pushed her glasses up onto her head, deciding it would be easier to see without them entirely than to look through the wet lenses.

“I guess it’s already awkward, huh?” Undyne grimaced. “Mew Mew wouldn’t have jumped in the ocean just because she got nervous in front of her crush.”

Alphys blinked and rubbed her eyes. She didn’t know why; it wasn’t like seeing better would felp her understand Undyne’s words.

“You were nervous? About going out with me?”

“Huh?” Undyne straightened. “Uh—no! I’m not scared of anything! I like to eat rocks!!”

Alphys couldn’t help it. She doubled over, snorting into her hands.

“What? WHAT?” Undyne demanded. “There’s nothing funny about eating rocks! It’s super cool and sexy!!”

“I b-believe you,” Alphys said through her snorting laughs. It was only half sarcastic—she knew Undyne could make anything look cool and sexy.

“Good. Because I’m right.” Undyne nodded decisively. “Oh, you dropped these.”

She held out the fuzzy outline of Alphys’s glasses. Alphys hadn’t felt them fall off of her head. When she touched the lenses, they now had sand stuck to them in addition to being blurred with saltwater.

“They’re too smudged to see through, anyway.”

“Not if I have anything to say about it!!”

Undyne snatched the glasses back, scrubbing at them with the hem of her tank top. It couldn’t do much—her shirt was too soaked to dry anything off. But after a moment of frustrated cleaning, and against all odds, there was a flash of light. Undyne passed the glasses back, and Alphys could see through them perfectly.

“H-how did you…?”

“Magic.” Undyne grinned. “Sometimes the answer actually is to catch stuff on fire! Fuhuhu!”

But, Undyne couldn’t use fire magic—could she?

Alphys still had a lot to learn about her best-friend-and-crush. For now, she just smiled, and enjoyed being able to see Undyne’s gorgeous face again.

“Thanks.”

“You’re welcome!” Undyne held out her arm, her elbow bent at an awkward angle. “Now, shall we commence this romantic stroll or whatever?”

Alphys bit back another snort and took Undyne’s arm.

XXX

Somehow, the walk was romantic. The moon glistened off the waves and Undyne’s bare arms. She eagerly scooped up every pretty shell they passed, handing them to Alphys and saying that they reminded Undyne of her. Having her arms full of shells meant that she couldn’t hold Undyne’s arm anymore, but it was a small price to pay for the countless reminders that she was loved, loved, loved.

Undyne loved her. Undyne wanted to be around her, even when she was awkward, even when she’d made horrible mistakes. Even when her dress was splattered with water and her feet almost tripped over its puffy hem.

“S-sorry,” she apologized when Undyne caught her for the fourth time. “This dress, um, is a little too long for me…” It had been Mettaton’s, but it no longer fit him now that he spent most of his time in his EX form.

“I can fix that!”

Undyne grinned, summoned a spear, and sliced off the trailing end of the dress. The ragged hem now hit at the middle of Alphys’s calves. The cool evening breeze hit her legs at full force.

“I—er—thanks?” Oh gosh, she was so awkward. Undyne had just been trying to help! Sure, the cut might not be perfect, but Alphys needed to get it hemmed if she wanted to keep it anyway. There was something organic about the ragged edges, too—something that would always remind Alphys of this night.

Maybe she wouldn’t get it hemmed after all.

“It’s terrible, isn’t it,” Undyne said, a tense grin still frozen on her face.

“N-no! Of course it isn’t!”

Undyne sighed, plopping down in the sand and crossing her arms over her knees. Tentatively, Alphys joined her, setting the armful of seashells between them.

“I don’t know how to do all—” Undyne waved an arm at the sky, “—this.”

Alphys’s brow furrowed. “All what?”

“Mushy stuff. Romance. I dunno.” She shrugged. “Human hist—I mean, uh, anime makes it look so easy.”

“You think… I want you to be more like an anime character?”

A wave of shame crashed over her. Hadn’t that been exactly what she was thinking? Picturing their date like an episode of Mew Mew Kissy Cutie?

“I mean, why wouldn’t you? They’re cool and hot and I’m just… ugh. I’m being stupid.”

Undyne dropped her head on top of her knees. Alphys had never seen her like this—she’d never known Undyne could be like this. As much as Alphys’s heart hurt for her, she couldn’t help feeling a sense of relief.

“Undyne.” Alphys scooted closer, not caring about the sand that got stuck in her dress. “For one thing, I don’t want you to be anyone else. I always wanted to go out with you.”

Undyne looked up, her one eye blinking. “You literally told me that Mew Mew was the love of your life.”

“Th-that’s because I was stupid!” Ugh, she should’ve known that embarrassing mid-binge confession would come back to bite her. “And because—you were so far out of my league, it w-was easier to see myself with a cartoon character than with you.”

Undyne cackled so loud, a stray flock of seagulls scrambled to take flight, cawing indignantly.

“I know it sounds dumb, but—”

“No, it doesn’t.” Undyne got ahold of herself and smiled at Alphys. “It’s funny because I felt the same way about you.”

“You—what?”

“You were so cool.” Undyne looked back towards her knees. “You had a doctorate. You could build anything you put your mind to. Asgore loved you instantly.”

Alphys blushed, both from the praise and from the memory of her less-than-wholesome thoughts about the king.

“H-he practically adopted you! And besides, everything I did was—was a lie.” Her tail curled around her toes. “You know that. All my experiments did was make things worse for everyone.”

“I don’t think Shyren and the dogs think so.” Gently, Undyne wrapped an arm around her shoulders. “Maybe it didn’t turn out how you meant it, but you saved their families’ lives. You can’t feel bad about that.”

She could. Alphys was very good at feeling bad about plenty of things. But… she didn’t have to.

Undyne was friends with Shyren, and the dogs were all members of her Royal Guard. If she said that they were happy, Alphys trusted her.

“Th-thanks, Undyne.” She smiled up at her. “It’s still hard to picture, though. You thinking I was out of your league, I mean.”

“Then you need to keep taking Papyrus’s confidence classes.” Undyne grinned and poked her arm.

Alphys giggled, and channeling what confidence she did have, she rested her head on Undyne’s shoulder.

“You remember what I said, when we were talking with Frisk before leaving the Underground?”

“Uh. About watching anime online? Or about Asgore getting back with his ex?”

“N-neither!!” Alphys blushed. So far there were no signs of “Torigore” ever blossoming again, to her disappointment. That was what she got for shipping her friends, though.

“I mean, when I said that real life is the greatest fanfiction at all,” Alphys clarified. “No matter how much I dreamt about dating Mew Mew, it’s nothing compared to this.”

“Really?” Undyne asked. Her voice sounded adorably hopeful.

“Really.” Alphys snuggled closer against Undyne’s side. The pile of seashells dug into her legs through her dress, but she couldn’t bring herself to mind.

Just sitting with Undyne like this… she might have felt nervous at first, but the anxiety seemed to wash away with the tide. Undyne wasn’t larger than life—at least not in the way that Alphys had first pictured her. She was just a really cool girl, who happened to think that Alphys was really cool, too.

“Man.” Undyne chuckled. “I guess it wasn’t stupid to write that love letter after all.”

Alphys jolted up. “Wait—that was you?”

“Uh, yeah?” She stared. “What, did you think it was… no way.”

Undyne’s snort quickly turned to cackles again.

“Wh-what was I supposed to think? You didn’t sign it! And you had Frisk give it to me!!”

Unless Frisk had stolen it or something, which Alphys couldn’t entirely rule out. They were nosy like that.

“I meant to sign it!! Besides, it was in my handwriting!!!”

“I thought you transcribed it because Frisk didn’t know how to write!!”

At that admission, Alphys couldn’t help laughing too. It did sound really stupid when she said it out loud.

Soon she and Undyne were both cackling, flopped backwards in the sand.

“We’re both pretty stupid, huh?” Undyne grinned.

“You said it, not me.” Alphys smiled back. “But, um. I like being stupid with you. This is… this is the best date I’ve ever been on.”

“It’s the only date I’ve ever been on! Unless you count that one time with Temmie… which I don’t!!”

Alphys’s mouth opened, then closed. She’d ask about that eventually, but for now, she just wanted to enjoy their time together.

“Then… to being stupid together.” Alphys twined her fingers with Undyne’s. Her scales were cool against her palm.

“To being stupid.” Undyne squeezed back.

Alphys’s soul fluttered, giving her the confidence she needed to bring one of her fanfics to life.

She scooted closer, slowly enough so Undyne could pull back if she wanted, and pressed her lips to hers.

It wasn’t like fireworks, or rainbows, or anything that anime had taught her. But it also wasn’t like kissing someone made of fire, or kissing a toothy burlap dummy. Sure, Undyne had plenty of fangs—which nipped pleasantly at Alphys’s lips in a way she was pretty sure was accidental—but she was also surprisingly gentle. Soft. Maybe even… shy?

“Um.” Undyne pulled back. “Was that… good? I didn’t hurt you, did I?”

“Babe.” Alphys grinned. “If that’s what you’re worried about, you’re going to have to try a little harder than that.”

Hesitantly, Undyne smiled back.

“O-okay! This time, there’s no holding back!”

Undyne’s lips met hers again, and she was true to her word.

[aroseandapen]

Bumfuzzle {Gem/Light/Alphys (Sanscest + Salphys)}

{Day 26 of a 30 Day Dictionary Challenge I’m doing}

Note: Based off of @ryliescreativecorner Starseed AU (BlackLight’s original timeline being a Dancetale/Handplates crossover). GemLight (A ship of two of their AU Sanses)+ Alphys from Light’s universe.

(Double note, Rylie is a great artist, and I’ve commissioned them a couple times and I’m never disappointed.)

Bumfuzzle (verb): To confuse or fluster.

“Well if you think about it, the second one wasn’t that bad.”

“What?!” Alphys jolted upright from the pillow she’d made out of BlackLight’s shoulder, leaning over him to fix Gem with a flabbergasted look. “Ohmigod, you take that back.”

Gem looked up at her from Light’s other shoulder, the corners of his mouth twitching up in a grin. He looked mischievous. “What? I’m serious. I actually like it better than the original.”

Alphys gaped at him, hardly able to believe this betrayal. How dare he think that season two was anything but garbage when compared to the original anime? And how dare he insinuate that it was even better! She’d never been so offended in her life, and if she didn’t know any better, she’d think that Gem was only saying it to rile her up.

Oh hell, Alphys did know better, and that was exactly the sort of thing that Gem would do.

“You’re lying, you do not!” she exclaimed, slumping forward so that her weight fell against Light.

Gem shifted, lifting his head and pressing forward as well to match her, and between the two of them they effectively had a BlackLight sandwich. “I’m not lying. Have you really paid attention to the new themes in Mew Mew Kissy Cutie 2? It’s actually pretty deep if you think about it.”

“You--!”

“He-e’s actually serious, watch out. He’s had plenty of practice with this sa-ame conversation before; he mi-ight have an edge on you,” Light warned from the spot between them that he’d been trapped in.

Alphys puffed out her cheeks, her eyes slitting behind her glasses as she tried to... stare down the offending skeleton? She actually wasn’t sure what the goal was. In the end, she decided that a full-blown debate probably wouldn’t go in her favor and it was in her best interest to drop it. A sharp huff escaped her and she slid down so that she was laying stomach-down across Light’s lap, almost missing the tiny “a-ahhh” that Light let out at the change in position.

“I can’t believe this horrible betrayal. How could you enjoy MMKC2 more than the first one? My entire world has been shattered.”

Two separate bony hands patted the top of her head in consolation, just barely out of sync with each other.

“There, there.” Gem was the one to speak. “The ending of the first Mew Mew Kissie Cutie is still the best.”

Alphys perked up immediately. “Of course it is! It’s so good, oh my god, hold on, hold on, I need to get my laptop. You need to hear this fan-cover that I found--it’s so good!”

“Le-et’s hear it.”

Thirty minutes later, they had listened to the fan-cover she’d mentioned and were several videos deep into the related section, ending up in a ‘how-to’ dance for some anime that only Alphys had heard of, but were content to listen to the music and watch how excited she would get while talking about her favorite parts and her analysis of each episode.

Suddenly she jumped up to her feet. “I can’t sit still anymore, come on Light, learn this with me.”

“Wh-a-at, wait, I--” His protests came too late, Alphys claiming his hands to tug him up to stand with her.

Gem scooted to the now-empty center of the couch, throwing out his support with some enthusiastic clapping. “Go get it, Hun, you got this.”

And despite Light’s initial reservations, with Alphys dancing at his side it didn’t take long before he relaxed and enjoyed dancing along with her. Alphys let out a little giggle of delight, doing a little hop and spin around Light, only to be caught around the waist and pulled in close. They definitely weren’t following the video anymore, matching bright glows in their chests, and bright looks on their faces.

Even just as a spectator to the two monsters that he loved dancing about, Gem couldn’t be more content.