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#(there are specific Reasons™ for this but I don't want to put them in this post. unless someone like. asks me to elaborate or something.)
musical-chick-13 · 7 months
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re: Wicked the musical being my favorite thing, I feel obligated to see the movie when it comes out in November to give my Opinion™ on it, but also. I'm scared.
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moe-broey · 1 year
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Boots :)
Another Started As A Test Subject and now they're literally the only thing I ever fucking wear. Idk how well it shows in the pics but they are badly cracked and have been worn into the ground but like. Shoe comfy :(
Also the wings are a new addition! The inner ones slap against each other. Doesn't really bother me personally though so I'm keeping them as is 😅 Oh, and the laces are paracord!
#funnily enough these are also something i got at the beginning of my transition thinking 'oh yeah this is masc. surely.'#final tangent but this is why insane fucking terfs/transphobes who are like#'noooo don't transition what about our butches what about our tomboy gfs :(((('#i was literally never either of those things.#they are all so stupid 🥲 (for. a lot of very obvious reasons LMFAOO but specifically for that as well.)#but yeah i literally used fashion and artsy self expression as a way to cope LMFAOOO#and as a way to draw attention away from myself. despite. drawing SO much attention to myself.#seems counter intuitive and i won't argue w you there LMAOO it was to sort of just. be like.#look at my cute outfit :) don't. don't even think about the guy underneath them.#AND it was ALSO the only way i could somehow feel some semblance of self. cause i did truly love what i'd wear#and then i'd wonder why i'd break down crying at the thought of what i am without those clothes.#just? a girl? the idea gutted me and made me want to tear my skin off with my nails and teeth#but like. i'm sure this has zero implications about me. who i am. ect. and has nothing to do w trans thoughts i had in middle school.#time to pick a perfect outfit and get a good grade in Girl™ 😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊#nowadays i just wake up put on a band tee and i'm just some guy. forever and always. it's so fucking cool#literally does not matter if it's a pants day or a shorts and tights day i'm just some guy. it's so fucking awesome 😎👍#for real even though i do still struggle w dysphoria some days worse than others i am so at peace.#i just wish everyone saw me the way i do. i literally cannot comprehend how anyone looks at me and goes#'ah....... a woman.' like. dude. for real? what are you seeing that i don't.#like bro!!! way not cool!!!! lame ass motherfucker!!!!#<- GSJSGSJ WAIT WHEN DID I USE THIS TAG BEFORE LMFAOO?? IT'S. SO FITTING HERE HAHAHAHA#anyways i was gonna say idk if i saw a motherfucker who's clearly striving for some androgyny#and a sick ass mullet no matter what immediately registers in my mind that i may have to correct later#i'm just. going to assume. they are some type of queer. and i am avoiding pronouns/gendered language#til they tell me 'oh yeah i'm :) and my pronouns are :)' and i'd adjust accordingly.#like idk that's so normal to me. what's not clicking for literally everyone else.#UGH ANYWAY i've been ranting and infodumping way too long i wanna get ready for bed now LMFAO#also if at any point you've looked at these pics and thought 'damn bitch you live like this'#yes. i know. i'm aware. i do live like this LMFAO 🫡😔#my projects
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travalerray · 8 months
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it's the WORST when you can't interact with a particular fandom at ALL because they are simply incapable of talking about the plot but WILL talk about your NOTP for hours on end so you just mope about it in silence
#griping and grumbling about fandom as usual#I understand that shipping is like. A huge part of fandom culture#but it's getting on my nerves lmao#and I am going to bitch about it on my personal blog if nowhere else#(another reason I hate the ship is because of the awful power dynamics that are passed off as sexy™ and specific scenes that annoy me to#death. It's just a specific irk of mine. I don't really like ships where there is SUCH a huge power gap and then the narrative is like. But#did you know that the MAN in the higher power position ALSO suffered SO much. Like yes I know it's not the fault of the novels themselves#(they are...passable. Not the best I have read but I like them fine so) because they do engage with the themes somewhat (even if I wish tha#the author did not put the romance element due to fandom pressure. Airplane ass writing in play here. Feeling more and more like Cucumber b#the day) it still feels icky. I am very much for bad meetings turning to love trope but god this is just annoying#I don't know. He is a good character. She is a good character. Everyone is a good character. Romance? Trash. Plot? Lost track#I think the main reason is that it's trying to pull the ''she is not like the other girls because she is not into his looks (lmao) and thus#they are fated'' like I don't want to say it but I really don't like the romance trope of ''they were not like the other girls because they#were the only person who did not want to fuck them. Thus the story can only end when they do would want to fuck them'' like bitch what#it's worse when I see someone hc'ing her as as/pec like.....I wish we could have that#I wish we could have as/pec characters in mainstream media without having to specifically keep typing and filtering for them#it hurts so bad.#it's one of the biggest reasons I can't be bothered to watch the other one#sigh.#is it so bad to want a story where the mc isn't attracted to the creep and remains not attracted to said creep (who also! Isn't! Attracted!#To! Her!)#like yeah yeah there probably is but I have to put effort into searching that up so I am going to complain for a few more seconds and go#back to sleep.#kk's rambles tag
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14dayswithyou · 4 months
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Meowdy Saint! ^^ lolol hello hello o/ hope you are doing good!!
So this masterpiece of a game has been invading my mind with ZERO chill lately which directly translated to me coming up with a TON of questions orz I really didn't realize how many I ended up compiling lol
If you don't feel like answering this many please feel absolutely free to ignore this ask or only answer the ones you like the most, the last thing I want is for you to feel overwhelmed! ^^
ALRIGHT LET'S-A GO
-do Rendacted's memories remain intact when he resets the day or do his wipe too with everyone else's? Also is there an in-universe answer for why he has these glitchy powers or is he just Built Different™?
-if angel made it VERY clear that they would be mad asf and prolly even start hating and leave Ren/[REDACTED] if he were to hurt their friends(or killing people bc this man needs to chill fr), would he listen to them? Bc I know that if he touches Violet, Elanor, Kiara or god forbid Moth I'm personally deleting his kneecaps 🥰
-since it seems to me that Ren/[REDACTED] is only kinda meh at cooking I was wondering if he actually made the not burnt pancakes in day 3 or if he had some store bought ones that he passed off as his own lol
-does he know how to give massages? :00
-during day 1, how did Ren come up with a book on the local flora?? It seems like such a random topic to pick when put on the spot without already having a genuine interest in it lmao
-if I understood correctly Maple should be Jae's dog right?? Did you have a specific breed or age in mind when creating her? I got curious because in my head she automatically popped up as a young australian shepherd to match with Jae's hyperactive dumbass energy lol❀⸜(˶´ ˘ `˶)⸝❀
-staying on the dog topic lol, in day 1 when angel gets up from the couch to get Ren the inflatable mattress(iirc) and he follows right behind them i immediately thought he acted like a puppy lmao. So would he mind being called 'puppy' as a pet name?
(I am not sure if this⬇️ questions falls under character deaths, if it does I really apologize and absolutely feel free to ignore it ^^)
-from an ask from last year it seems [REDACTED] would ultimately kill angel if there was ultimately not way to enter in their life?? Gotta say I was very taken aback by this, would this still be the case after a year of building more to his character? (Ok I went back to check the ask again but I can't for the life of me find it anymore maybe I dreamt it up idk😭😭 im really sorry if that is the case jdkslajdl)
-uuhh I know there is already a lot in this ask(im seriously sorry orz), but I was wondering if we will eventually get an SFW alphabet for Ren/[REDACTED] for the folks who don't care about the nasty 👉👈
-THIS IS THE LAST THING I PROMISE 👹 will there be a guide to get all the endings? I'm not sure if there is one already and in that case I missed it 100%
Also I find it ironic how the fandom is trying to find out every single aspect of Ren/[REDACTED]'s character the same way he must do with angel lmao
ALRIGHT THATS ALL IM SO SORRY FOR ASKING SO MUCH THE REN BRAINROT HOURS ARE SO REAL IM LOSING BRAINCELLS orz Remember to take care of yourself drink water and take breaks!! ദ്ദി ˉ͈̀꒳ˉ͈́ )✧
(Also sorry if some phrases don't make sense, english isn't my first language as I am 🤌 lolol)
✦゜ANSWERED: Under da cut because this got long >:3
-do Rendacted's memories remain intact when he resets the day or do his wipe too with everyone else's? Also is there an in-universe answer for why he has these glitchy powers or is he just Built Different™? Ren's memories remain intact!! I mean... He remembers each time you get a bad end and sometimes says something different... >:3 There is also an in-universe reason as to why he has his abilities — I won't spoil anything, but his real name (along with River's and one other character) have a reeeeally big tell. But what this tell is is for me to know and you to find out >:3
-if angel made it VERY clear that they would be mad asf and prolly even start hating and leave Ren/[REDACTED] if he were to hurt their friends(or killing people bc this man needs to chill fr), would he listen to them? Bc I know that if he touches Violet, Elanor, Kiara or god forbid Moth I'm personally deleting his kneecaps 🥰 Ren (and by extension [REDACTED]) knows not to harm anyone if he knows you won't like it — and even then — he won't actively show that murderous side of him in the first place. To Angel, Ren is just a timid, normal guy.
-since it seems to me that Ren/[REDACTED] is only kinda meh at cooking I was wondering if he actually made the not burnt pancakes in day 3 or if he had some store bought ones that he passed off as his own lol Ren is actually good at cooking, he's just a bit out of touch since he doesn't normally cook for himself! It's normally microwave meals or takeout for him... ^^; And yes, Ren did burn and burn the pancakes in Day 3 — he was distracted by something on his phone :3
Bonus cut Day 3 content: I took out the scene where Ren started to profusely apologise for burning the pancake because he often had to cook when he was younger. Given the dynamic of his family and the environment he grew up in, Ren didn't have much room to make mistakes ;n; I cut this scene out because I felt bad ksgskd So y'all get to have flustered, happy Ren instead!!
-does he know how to give massages? :00 If that was one of Angel's interests or desires, then sure!! ^^
-during day 1, how did Ren come up with a book on the local flora?? It seems like such a random topic to pick when put on the spot without already having a genuine interest in it lmao Someone else likes flora too, and it sure would be funny if Ren (eventually) starts to mimic certain traits and interests of the person you have the highest affinity/relationship points with in order to make himself look more appealing… >:3c
-if I understood correctly Maple should be Jae's dog right?? Did you have a specific breed or age in mind when creating her? I got curious because in my head she automatically popped up as a young australian shepherd to match with Jae's hyperactive dumbass energy lol❀⸜(˶´ ˘ `˶)⸝❀ It was mentioned in Jae's lore post (I'll link it here once I find it), but Maple is a Labrador! (Leon would be Jae's Australian Shepherd hehe) In my mind, Maple is only 2 or 3 years old, but that wouldn't really fit the official timeframe... ^^; Jae adopted Maple during high school so he wouldn't feel lonely at home, and it's been over 6+ years since then.... hgdshjg
-staying on the dog topic lol, in day 1 when angel gets up from the couch to get Ren the inflatable mattress(iirc) and he follows right behind them i immediately thought he acted like a puppy lmao. So would he mind being called 'puppy' as a pet name? Angel affectionately calls Ren a puppy during the scene in Day 1 where they meet up after work, so that nickname definitely could work!
-from an ask from last year it seems [REDACTED] would ultimately kill angel if there was ultimately not way to enter in their life?? Gotta say I was very taken aback by this, would this still be the case after a year of building more to his character? (Ok I went back to check the ask again but I can't for the life of me find it anymore maybe I dreamt it up idk😭😭 im really sorry if that is the case jdkslajdl) aaa I think you might be mistaking that ask for something else? ;v; [REDACTED] would NEVER harm Angel in any capacity, and they're a very patient person. Even if it took decades for Angel to fall in love with him, they'll wait.
-uuhh I know there is already a lot in this ask(im seriously sorry orz), but I was wondering if we will eventually get an SFW alphabet for Ren/[REDACTED] for the folks who don't care about the nasty 👉👈 You're fine!! And I'm open to doing that! I'll add it to my list hehe
-THIS IS THE LAST THING I PROMISE 👹 will there be a guide to get all the endings? I'm not sure if there is one already and in that case I missed it 100% I've shared a spreadsheet that lists all the available choices, the points you earn from each of them, and the endings you can get — however it's only available on Discord and I don't really want to share it outside of the server and potentially put it in the hands of minors. Sorry!!
Also I find it ironic how the fandom is trying to find out every single aspect of Ren/[REDACTED]'s character the same way he must do with angel lmao Hehe >:3 There's a loooot of lore that won't ever be mentioned in the game (since it doesn't seem fitting/I don't see a reason to), so I'm happy to provide it here!
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missashketchum · 2 months
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Vice Dorm Leaders and Ash’s Pokemon!
here we are, it’s the vice dorm leaders time to shine!
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me when rook just rooks
FINALLY THIS HAS BEEN IN MY DRAFTS FOR MONTHS AND I FINALLY GOT THE INSPIRATION BOOST TO FINISH IT DIUSGFCUJKSD (doesn't include Ruggie since he's not a vice dorm leader)
Trey- Noctowl
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Out of all the students, if Ash couldn't take Noctowl anywhere with her, he would rather stay with Trey over anyone else
The two just vibe together, being rather calm within the chaos of their respective places
Noctowl is also very helpful with his psychic moves
There's really not much to say about these two, they enjoy each other's company
Jade- Buizel
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Buizel’s a smart cookie, so at first, he doesn't even glance at Jade
It wasn't until Buizel began getting interested in Twisted Wonderland and began picking random plants that Jade garnered his attention
Imagine this, Buizel's picking some flowers and mushrooms and stuff to show off to the others when Jade approaches them
And Jade is curious about what Buizel has, and he wants them
Eventually, after a lot of charades, they made a deal
Buizel gets plants and stuff for Jade's terrariums, and Buizel gets the terrariums in return
Cue Ash being hella confused as to where Buizel's getting all these terrariums from lmao
They're chill, but one wrong move and Buizel's using Ice Aqua Jet on his ass lmao
Jamil- Heracross
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hahaha F E A R
The first time Jamil saw Heracross, he was terrified, mainly because he fought the bug while Overblot
And the idea that this bug can fight and toss him like a sack of potatoes made him very uncomfy
Heracross actually hates Jamil in the beginning and actively went out of its way to scare him
But that eventually evolved into Heracross scaring Jamil because he thought his reactions were funny
Jamil is having a BadTime™
And see the gif? Heracross would do that SPECIFICALLY TO FREAK HIM OUT XD
Rook- Glalie
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i know this one seems a bit random but i put Unfezant with Vil AND Rook so i had to change it lmao
Rook is very curious about Ash's Pokemon, but for some reason, Ash's Pokemon are always on alert when he's around
Glalie is as cheerful and curious as his is protective, however
The Ice-type is one of the first of her 'Mons to approach the hunter
And despite his funky looks, Rook is smitten with him, finding him rather cute, in it's own little way
Is entraptured by Glalie's ice attacks, and is constantly singing his praises, which both embarrasses and makes him huff in pride
So Rook is... okay in Glalie's book, but the others? He still has a lot of work to do...
Lilia- Noivern
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Noivern! The baby!!!!
Despite his large stature and intimidating aura, Ash's Noivern is still technically a baby
And Lilia, if given the chance, would absolutely SPOIL HIM ROTTEN
Just... don't let him get close to Noivern with his concoctions...
Wait...
NOIVERN LIKES IT?!?!?!?!?
Noivern is the ONLY creature that can and is willing to eat Lilia's food and keep it down
Baby is indestructible
Also likes Lilia's taste in heavy metal music and would sometimes join in on the jam sessions the Light Music Club has
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yukimomodivorce · 2 months
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The Ghosts in IDOLiSH7 are a Literary Device, Mostly
(an essay by me)
People are always asking me, "Robin, what the fuck is up with those ghosts in IDOLiSH7? How come this otherwise completely non-supernatural universe randomly has these two ghosts that show up and then never get acknowledged again? Is it just canon that ghosts exist and only Riku and Momo can see them?" and I am always telling them that I have an analysis about this I just haven't written it yet. But that ends today, as do all of these very pressing concerns about the i7 Ghosts™, because here I am, finally writing the analysis. This essay will have two sections, the first on the training camp ghost from part 3/third beat, and the second on the Re:vale house ghost from Yuki's third chapter of Re:member. So, spoilers for all of part 3/third beat in both sections, Re:member in section 2, and there's one extremely minor spoiler for part 4 in section 1 but it's honestly so predictable I don't think it even counts. Also, I'll reiterate this once we get to it, but just a warning that section 2 will contain discussions of depression, suicide and suicidal ideation, and a brief mention of self-harm, so please stop reading after section 1 if you don't want to see any of that! Another less important disclaimer about section 2 is that I am going to spend an entirely unecessary amount of time talking about Yuki. I am normal about Yuki. Okay. Without further ado, let's watch my spiral into ghost analogy insanity unfold!
Game translations: @seigyokus Re:member translations: @ takara_time (+ scans and editing by @ waitamomoment) Rabbit chat translations: @osakaso5
Section 1: The Training Camp Ghost
This first point applies to both ghosts, but I wanna start by noting that I think superstitions and beliefs like this are more common in Japan than a lot of other places, so yeah it is entirely possible that ghosts are just a canon and accepted thing in Idolish7's universe and this isn't really that strange of a detail for the series to include. However, I don't have any real background knowledge about if ghosts are normal in non-supernatural anime/etc. and I am not committing to that kind of research, so we'll have to leave the specifics of the ghost canonicity issue to someone else. But regardless of how canon they are, I think we've established well enough by now that the i7 writers don't put much of anything in the series without reason (re:vale band name you will always be famous. to me), and that definitely applies here as well - both of our ghosts are doing a LOT of potential symbolic work in their brief appearances, and that's what we'll be unpacking today, starting with the TCG.
The infamous TCG (training camp ghost) of Atami needs no introduction, but I'll give her one anyway. During the filming of the Friends Day special, upon following the shopping group home, she offers her services to Riku (inexplicably the only person capable of communicating with her) for the evening entertainment group's test of courage, terrorises several cast members throughout the day, and finally brings us Soma Saito's incredible cover of Dis One before probably being sent back to idol fan purgatory forever. Who is she? Where did she come from? I have several theories.
1.1: The TCG is the audience
While the 'ghosts are real in i7' possibility is there, I think it's also important to note in this case that the whole training camp is very explicitly being filmed for TV, and the biggest vibe I get from this episode of the anime is that the ghost is a part of the show, and we're seeing that show through the eyes of its in-universe audience. This happens pretty often in i7 (for example, when we see the groups talk to their fans during concerts), and generally the line between the real fans and the fictional ones can get pretty blurred (which deserves its own much longer analysis but I Am Not Writing All That), so everything with the in-universe audience here kind of naturally extends to us as the real audience. The TCG would probably be easy enough to manufacture with special effects as long as Riku and the driver guy were in on it, and it would make sense for the Friends Day producers to include it to keep things entertaining and be a stand-in for their viewers/fans of the idol groups - the ghost is specifically a female fan of male idols (Zero), and a lot of her interactions with the cast would qualify as self-insert material (e.g. Tenn singing for her and Riku looking directly into the camera to smile at her). And speaking of Tenn and Riku,
1.2 The TCG is Nanase twins angst
I think this connection is fairly obvious in their exchange here. You could make a case for the ghost representing either one of the twins. Like Riku, she's being pushed away by Tenn before she's ready to leave, told that it's necessary and for the best that they stay separated - after all, they live in different worlds. Like Tenn, she's leaving despite Riku's protests and part of her not really wanting to go at first, because she believes it's for the best that they stay separated - after all, they live in different worlds.
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There's also the association with ghosts of being ignored/invisible, and Riku being the only person able to see or talk to her. Maybe it's because he's the only one who's able to reach her. Maybe he can see her because he understands her on some level - she was torn away from life like he was torn away from his brother, and she's now practically invisible to everyone else around her, like Riku probably feels to Tenn (and arguably the rest of his family in some ways). Maybe he wants her to feel seen, and he can make Tenn acknowledge her in the way he wants to be acknowledged by him. I might actually be going somewhere with this so bear with me for a second.
1.3: The TCG is monster Riku foreshadowing
So my first thought when I watched the Nanase twin angst portion of this episode was 'well obviously the ghost isn't real and Riku is just using it to talk to Tenn indirectly' because they are always having indirect conversations like this and it makes me insane, and I do still think that's the idea here, just not quite in the sense that Riku is making things up. Going back to the whole 'ghost is a stand-in for the audience' thing, and assuming that she's saying the things that Riku wants to say and Tenn is telling her the things he wants to tell Riku, then we could say that rather than Riku purposefully having the ghost speak for him, this is an extension of the monster effect. I guess in this scenario the TCG is a real ghost (and a figurative representation of the audience), and Riku is having the same effect on her that Iori says he has on everyone else. He unknowingly projects his desire to connect with his brother onto her, and she tries to help him. Really, the only times we see her after she follows the shopping group to their cabin are when she's helping Riku, with the test of courage and then with speaking to Tenn. This gets convoluted so I kinda doubt it's intentional? But it's fun to think about.
1.4: The TCG is the friends we made along the way
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Riku spells this out a bit more explicitly in the game here, but the TCG represents the each of the groups in the series in a couple different ways. I guess one way you could interpret this is that the ghost is meant to be there to emphasise how extraordinary it is that they're all together, but I don't think that really holds up considering how often they end up working with each other throughout the series anyway. What's important here is the idea of the ghost itself, something that can be present and felt even when it isn't physically or actually there. Again, the ghost is the audience - a constant influence for better and for worse on these idols even when they aren't watching, even in their personal lives; and vice versa, the ghost is the idols being able to reach their fans without ever actually knowing them. More relevant to what Riku says, the ghost is the groups to each other - friends, mentors, rivals, pushing them forward even when they aren't standing side by side. You could even say the ghost is ZOOL, friends who aren't here right now but will be someday. Re:vale and Idolish7 as groups don't especially fit the ghost description, but they have their fair share of ghosts - Banri, Haruki, Tenn, Aya, Sougo's uncle. Zero. The list goes on, for Trigger and ZOOL as well, but I think the most important way the ghost analogy applies to this section of the story is with Trigger. Because during the imminent Arc Where Trigger Gets Cancelled™, despite leaving their agency and disappearing almost entirely from the public eye, they're still very much there to their fans and to their friends. So. I kinda forgot what I was saying but to sum it all up the ghost here represents everything that stays with you even when it's far away or after it's gone from your life. Mikanseinabokura and all that. And now that I mention it-
Section 2: The Re:vale House Ghost
Once again, a warning that this section has a brief mention of self-harm, as well as in-depth discussions of depression, suicide and suicidal ideation (which I'm gonna be talking about pretty bluntly the entire time), so please don't proceed unless you're comfortable with all of that!
Like most things in Re:member, the RHG (Re:vale house ghost) makes me insane. Today I am going to attempt to form coherent thoughts about it and it is unlikely that I'll succeed, but try to bear with me. Though it isn't around for as long as the TCG, we have a little more info about the RHG - it's the ghost that haunts the shitty apartment Yuki and Momo live in together in their early days as Re:vale. Supposedly. All it actually does is slam the door of one kitchen cabinet and I don't think that this is definitive evidence of paranormal activity because most houses are just like that. It's all a little bit vague, but according to Re:vale, their house is definitely haunted by the ghost of someone who died in the kitchen, because when they move in there is a mysterious black stain on their kitchen floor. Momo introduces himself to the floor stain while Yuki stares at him in awe and blushes and shoujo filter flowers appear in his eyes. God I hate them. I think the RHG is just a figment of their collective imagination or maybe they're having one of those shared delusions or something. But that's really besides the point because this ghost exists for one very specific thematic purpose: the RHG is Yuki.
And on that note, let's go back and talk about Yuki for a few minutes (potentially hours) before we get to our actual analysis of the ghost scene. Mostly because I just wanna talk about him, but also because I do understand why some people think the 'Momo starts talking to ghosts' part of Re:member is kinda weird and random, and I think at least some of this is important to go over before we unpack it.
A consensus has already been established among Yuki scholars that our subject has autism (Kei et al. 2024). Today, I would like to propose an additional diagnosis: Yuki has depression.
2.1: "I lost my dreams, friends, and passion as well."
So, Yuki pretty clearly gets depressed when Ban leaves him. He loses interest in everything he used to care about, gives up on his dreams, blames himself for Ban's injury and disappearance, he's constantly sad, tired and irritable, and he lashes out at Momo (and Kujou, though there are some other pretty strong reasons for that one) and presumably everyone else he knows (I doubt he had a particularly good relationship with anyone else in the first place, but still).
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He's grieving here, and it would make sense for him to react this way because of that fact alone. But I really don't think that's all there is to it, because he exhibits these symptoms (among others) long before Ban leaves him. He can't get out of bed in the mornings, he rarely leaves the house if he can avoid it, he has days where he can't eat or sleep, he's underweight and always tired and generally known to lack energy and be slow (or 'lazy') and in some cases listless and despondent. Ban even says that he wouldn't put it past Yuki to start slitting his wrists. And it's subtle, but there's one more really big one that really never goes away for him, even after he finds Ban.
2.2: "I don't need anyone to love me."
I'll get straight to the point. Yuki hates himself. Maybe only a little bit, maybe only sometimes, but it's there. Especially when he struggles with composing - he even says it himself in part 1 of his birthday photobook rabbit chat, almost immediately after saying that it made him want to kill himself but we'll get back to that part.
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But it's really everywhere on what seems to be a mostly subconscious level for him, if you know how to look, even from the very beginning:
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On paper, this line is just his frustration with being judged by anything other than his music, because it's something he cares a lot about and puts a lot of work into and he wants that to be acknowledged. But I think that if you take it in conjunction with some of the other things he tends to say, there's a little bit more to it.
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I dont need anyone to love me. Yuki's songs are worthy of love. Yuki is not. There is nothing valuable about Yuki other than his songs, he has nothing else that deserves any sort of praise, and without them, he's just a useless burden with nothing to offer. He doesn't need anyone to love him - he doesn't understand why anyone would. And Momo does, and he's a good person, and Yuki doesn't deserve that when there's nothing he can actually do for him. And when that starts to change and he starts getting better at showing kindness to others and being there for Momo, he doesn't see it as learning to better express his feelings, he sees is as learning to feel affection and be a good person, because he believes that he is inherently not. As far as he can tell, Yuki is just naturally a bad person and a bad partner who isn't kind and isn't capable of love or compassion, not unless he tries to be. He knows, because he's heard it god knows how many times - even Chiba Shizuo blatantly tells him that neither of them can become good people - and maybe things are different now, but on some basic level it'll always be who he is.
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Ok breaking character for a second, imagine you show up to your acting side gig and on the first day Keanu Reeves comes up to you and gives you $300 cash and then later he indirectly tells you that you're a nasty lonely egotistical failure. Now imagine you're Yuki and you have no fucking clue who Keanu Reeves is. He also shows you pictures of his top secret illegitimate son after talking to you for like 10 minutes and you have to lie to him about being straight. I think this is objectively the funniest situation to be in ever. Chiba Shizuo and Yamato both probably have depression also, but I'm not gonna spend any time on it, because every three months a person is torn to pieces by a crocodile in Northern Queensland. I forgot what I was talking about. Anyway
2.3: Hey remember that one time Yuki just straight up tried to kill himself
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Yeah, that one. As far as I know this is really never addressed or acknowledged again, so we're just gonna take the page-long gag from Re:member at face value and say that after Ban's disappearance, Yuki (almost) attempted suicide, and the only reason he didn't go through with it is because he couldn't find anywhere to hang the noose. And like, yeah you could say it's just because he thought Ban might have killed himself and he's always been the kind of hopeless romantic to be waxing poetic about how "I can't live without you," but at the same time, he had no apparent reason to believe this (even if Ban did have suicidal tendencies I doubt Yuki would've really known), and he was planning to go through with it (I know it's probably just for comedic effect but he left a will. He left a will. He's, like, 20, and surely not the kind of person who would just have something like that in order already). This is also emphatically not the last time or the only reason he thinks about it.
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I told you we'd get back to the photobook chat! I think there's also a lot you can infer from all the times he says he'd probably be dead by now without Momo and he wouldn't be able to handle losing him, what with the whole "when you jump, you'd better take me with you" thing. But regardless, this really isn't just that one time that Yuki tried to kill himself. It's suicidal ideation, and it's something he consistently struggles with especially in the few months after Ban leaves him. It even comes up in how he sees the 'paranormal activity' his new apartment:
2.4: "It seemed as though someone had hung themselves there."
Yeah it's the ghost I'm finally gonna talk about the ghost. I'm done with my Yuki has depression rant we can talk about why the ghost is Yuki now. I guess it might be more accurate to say that the ghost is Yuki's depression/suicidal thoughts/Banri trauma/whatever, but either way I think it represents him and he might also be semi-consciously projecting onto it, and I'm gonna go through line-by-line and try to explain my interpretation.
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I think if you want to there's definitely room to take the 'usual paranormal activity' super literally and say that Yuki was having outbursts and slamming doors at the time (which would also match up with him being startled by it). I think it's also important to note that this is happening around the time he mentions feeling suicidal and not being able to compose in the photobook chat, but the main thing here is that second line. Even though Momo is always so nice to him, he can't stop himself from getting mad and being difficult and depressed, and he can't return that kindness - he can't even be useful to him.
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I've already mentioned how I think Yuki's conclusion about the stain here plays into his suicidal ideation, but let's look at it a little more thematically. It's the way that even though it's glossed over earlier in the manga, Yuki's suicide attempt and everything that accompanied it still follows him, and it hangs (lol) heavy in their house like a ghost. To Yuki, it's startling and eerie - it scares him, and he's expecting it to scare Momo once he sees that side of him too. And it probably does scare him a little, and he hesitates, but he doesn't scream. Again, there's room to interpret this more literally as Momo finding out about his attempt/ideation/depression, or just as him inevitably seeing how he gets on his worse days, but either way the outcome is the same. Momo is starting to know Yuki as a person instead of an idol, flaws and probable mental illness and all, and his first reaction isn't to shy away or start to hate him or want to leave. It's an introduction. He makes it clear that they'll both be staying here from now on, that he's willing to live with the 'darker' sides of Yuki, and to help him do the same. Another point on this that's up to interpretation (because let's be real they're probably never gonna deal with this stuff explicitly in canon), you could see the whole ghost thing as neither of them really being able/wanting to accept that Yuki's symptoms are actually a part of him (and this is veering completely into fanfic territory but now I'm just imagining both of them silently agreeing to blame the things Yuki does on bad days on the ghost) but we've had enough angst for one day.
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Everything else lines up well enough with the ghost and Yuki, but it's really his reaction here that sells the whole thing for me. It's a simple gesture, but just by Momo greeting him, being by his side, waiting for him when he comes home, that constant reminder of all his darkest thoughts becomes just another mark on the floorboards. It's not gone, and it probably never will be. But at least now, he doesn't have to face it alone. And it doesn't look so scary anymore.
2.5: "Now I know joy, and the meaning of a smile."
I must confess that I lied to all of you earlier. I'm actually not done with my Yuki rant and also there's a good reason I've been ignoring all the parts of Re:member where he isn't being self-deprecating or trying to kill himself. The end of the ghost scene is only the beginning of the end of this analysis, and the end of this analysis is pretty much just me having a meltdown about Yuki. Also I'm running out of space for images so we're doing some of the quotes like this instead.
After losing Ban, I lost my dreams, friends, and passion as well. I could only feel a sting as the wind passed through an empty, gaping hole in my chest. But I breathed as best as I could, and he tried to clear the dirt out of that hole, filling it with his earnest words instead.
Yuki still exhibits a lot of symptoms of depression all the way through the series, like the low energy and the trouble eating and sleeping, and [redacted part 5 spoilers] makes me think there's definitely some sort of connection between his writers' block and his depressive episodes. He still mentions feeling guilty towards Banri in second beat, the suicidal ideation doesn't really come up explicitly but he kinda hints at it on a few occassions, and he's very adament that he was a bad person and still isn't really a good one. But it's like. I don't really know how to put this, but I guess it's not his default state anymore like it was right after Ban left (and possibly before that, too). For the most part, he really does get better, and these things become less intense and fewer and farther between. He would probably say that it's all thanks to Momo, and it is, but he also very much does it of his own volition. Momo refuses so desperately to give up on him, and because of that he makes that choice to keep going by restarting Re:vale with him.
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Yuki allows himself to let someone else in and start to love again - his partner, his music, his life. Even while he's thinking that he's just a burden to those around him, he doesn't resign himself to his fate like he might have done in the past. He's determined to become a better person, someone who can be a source of strength for Momo just like he was for him. And in the end, he does, but it's not just that. Now he knows joy. Now he can genuinely smile. And now,
I want to hear them scream my name. The voices that called out had annoyed me in the past. But now, I'll smile, together with Momo, who'll be by my side.
Going back to what I said about some of Yuki's subconscious self-hatred coming through in the way he wants people to look at his music and not at him, I. Cannot finish a sentence. Do NOT think about Yuki learning to love himself and see himself as worthy of love because Momo loved him just that much in a way that he could accept. BAD IDEA. Okay. So. It's Ban's advice and Momo's fan letter that get Yuki to accept that his fans do genuinely love his music in the first place, and I think it's here that it really starts to turn into him accepting the idea that they love other things about him too? Or that he really starts to want it and be happy about it instead of just accepting it? Whatever. I give up. I don't even like Re:vale anyway
That day, I would play the guitar I'd almost thrown at Kujou, because I now knew the power of a song that could not be silenced. I would dry my tears, open the door, and say, "I'm home."
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gale-gaze · 1 year
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@morganzephyr oh my gosh, I had to respond to this and I hope you don't mind me sharing, but this tag made my night because I have Gale and Astarion both very specifically wearing bandanas in Act 1 and someone liking that detail made my heart SING
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so my headcannon is that my Tav noticed Gale's "tattoo" and Astarion's bite marks pretty early - she got that high perception, ya know - and also noticed that they didn't seem comfortable talking about it yet without some trust
so my Tav was like "well if I noticed, someone else will surely notice, too - and I don't want them to feel pressured to talk about something before they feel ready if someone else calls it out and puts them on the spot"
so she puts together lil homemade bandanas with rags they happen to find and offers them to anyone that stays or visits camp under the guise of "I made extras, so you can wear em if you want to - I just needed something to keep my neck cool and shaded"
and both of those pampered babies were like "oh actually that's not an awful idea, I would hate a sunburn" - and thus my Bossbabe Bandana Brigade™ was born
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anyhow, thanks for coming to my impromptu headcanon dump, but it made my night to have a reason to post this lil brainworm and share a few gifs I hadn't posted!
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kafus · 1 month
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the epic conclusion to The Freakylocke™
recently i did a hardcore nuzlocke of pokemon firered but with an extra gimmick layered on top to keep me invested: naming all my encounters after my friends, randomly chosen by spinning a wheel of names whenever i get a new encounter. this is not the same as a "friendlocke" as popularized by saltydkdan if you're aware of that btw, my friend's don't roleplay the pokemon or pick what they do, i just livepost my playthrough with my friends and they get to feel like they're involved and it makes it a semi-social thing, which is fun for me. i did one of these in emerald last year with friends from a specific group chat with "club" in the name that i fittingly called the clublocke, and this time in firered i deemed the playthrough the "freakylocke", based off of a running gag in the group chat of friends i named my pokemon after this time (the likodot server!! hi guys!!) tbh if i keep doing these i should really think of a name for this Type of nuzlocke but i haven't figured one out yet... anyway
i did not actively livepost the freakylocke on tumblr because i already had my hands full liveposting it on discord to my friends in question! but the ending to the run ended up being so much fun that i wanted to do a retelling of the E4+champion here to memorialize this run lol
so! after NUMEROUS hours of grinding, i finally got the whole team to level 60, which is the level of lance's highest leveled pokemon, and was ready to take on the E4. my copy of firered is in japanese so for convenience's sake, i've edited these photos of my team taken before the E4 to have the move names in english
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a little more detail about the team: first off, they do all have hold items. frosty (frost in-game because frosty didn't fit the JPN character limit lol) the charizard has charcoal, bibi the golem has leftovers, zur the persian has a spell tag, motsu the jolteon has a magnet, mari the gengar has a twistedspoon, and vee the lapras has a mysticwater. multiple of these can be obtained easily, but i had to grind for the magnet, twistedspoon, and spell tag off of wild pokemon that only had a 5% chance of holding them, which was a bit of a nightmare lol. the spell tag had enabled zur to sweep sabrina (barring her venomoth which i swapped out for) by just clicking shadow ball, the twistedspoon was necessary for some damage ranges for koga with gengar's psychic, and i grinded for the magnet before the E4 because motsu's special attack was um... shit. i was making up for the minus special attack nature, careful lol
second, it's worth acknowledging that i half picked this team based on what encounters i thought i had that were strong, and half just because of emotional attachment, ESPECIALLY in the case of zur the persian - for some reason i got super attached to using persian during this playthrough and i was DETERMINED to get him to the end alive, even though persian was definitely not the most optimal pokemon for the job lol. i could go on about my move choices on these mons, but i'll spare you and let the upcoming fights speak for themselves, aside from quickly mentioning. Yes i put explosion on golem. ideally i wanted to go deathless but i figured it could be useful in a pinch if i was driven into a corner.
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the first three members of the e4 were uneventful and i made pretty quick work of them, even with motsu's terrible special attack missing some thunderbolt damage ranges on lorelei's water types, forcing me to send out vee, lol. but when things really got heated was during the lance fight. at this point i was playing on my ds capture card to share my screen to my friends, so i have clean photos! (the layout is leafgreen themed, it's something i made literal years ago, i was too lazy to make anything new lmao)
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one thing leads to another and i'm staring down lance's ace dragonite with frosty the charizard on half HP. my team at this point is incredibly healthy as i've maneuvered the battle well so far, but now i'm in a bit of a dilemma, because this dragonite has outrage AND hyper beam, both very powerful moves that will definitely get the KO on frosty if i leave him in, and to make matters worse, since both will KO, which one out of the two lance picks is random, so i can't accurately predict what he's going to do. i need to ideally get vee in to use ice beam, which should be a 1-shot, but it's risky... if i wanted to play fully optimally, i would scan my team for which member i would need least during the champion fight against blue and sacrifice them to get a clean swap into vee, but... i'm still dedicated to wanting to beat this E4 deathless at this point, so i decide, okay, vee is bulky, they can definitely live a hyper beam or two hits of outrage, i just need lance to not get a crit
and you won't believe what happens next when i hard swap into vee!
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lance uses hyper beam on the switch and GETS THE CRIT, FAINTING VEE IN ONE SHOT... the reaction in the discord chat speaks for itself LOL
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so at this point i'm kind of panicking since not only do i have to somehow make it out of this fight against lance's dragonite, i have to get out of it healthy enough to still handle the champion fight against blue, of which vee was my answer into his blastoise so that's. not good. and to make matters worse, while staring down my options and verbally reasoning out what i should do, i ACCIDENTALLY PREMATURELY SEND OUT FROSTY!! I LITERALLY JUST PRESSED THE WRONG BUTTONS BECAUSE MY HANDS WERE KIND OF SHAKY WHILE TRYING TO OPEN THE SUMMARY SCREEN SINCE I WAS INVESTIGATING WHETHER FROSTY (THE PERSON IN THE CHAT) WAS RIGHT ABOUT THE DRAGON CLAW 2HKO 😭
my one saving grace is that dragonite is now in hyper beam recharge, so now that i've accidentally sent out frosty i'm able to fire off a single dragon claw for free...
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and it's not even a two hit KO 😭!!! so the dream of just outspeeding dragonite and 2 shotting it with dragon claw is in the dust now and i have to make some tough choices.
ultimately, i decide frosty could potentially be too important for the champion fight to let them go down, and i decide to switch into bibi the golem... my thought process was, i definitely needed bibi the least for the fight against blue, so if dragonite picked outrage and bibi went down, i would be able to get a clean swap into something that could take on the last of dragonite's HP, or if dragonite picked hyper beam, bibi would tank that like a champ on account of resisting normal and having high physical defense, and be able to get a free hit in during the recharge turn.
i send out bibi holding my breath AND...
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LANCE CHOOSES HYPER BEAM!!! YES!!! and HILARIOUSLY it was ANOTHER CRIT, but bibi still shrugs it off like it's NOTHING
so now i'm in one last dilemma: i have two options here, taking the KO with a super effective rock slide, or taking the KO with an incredibly powerful explosion. rock slide seems like the obvious choice, but the issue is... it's only 90% accurate, and if it misses, bibi definitely dies next turn, and living the hyper beam would have been for nothing. on the other hand, explosion ensures the battle is won, but bibi definitely dies, in that case. i'm excessively indecisive on what to do so i ask my friends and their answer is pretty damn clear
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so i click rock slide. AND!!!!
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BIBI, THE ABSOLUTE CHAMP, LANDS IT!!!
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bibi clutching up against lance lets her not only live another day, but it means that i get to fight blue with a team of 5 instead of 4 or even worse! ...this does NOT mean the blue fight is going to be free, though.
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blue's team is actually pretty threatening at this point, especially without my lapras to tank blastoise's potentially rain-boosted hydro pumps. before jumping into the fight, i think very carefully about my options, but ultimately my prep work amounts to taking the charcoal off of frosty and giving them a chesto berry, just in case i have to hard swap into exeggutor and take a sleep powder, so i can one-shot it with flamethrower easily in that scenario.
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my lead is pretty straightforward, i just take out pidgeot immediately with thunderbolt from motsu.
next, blue sends out Rhydon. i debate on what to do for a moment, since obviously i need to swap out, but i'm unsure if rhydon will use earthquake or rock tomb - if EQ 1-shots motsu, it will definitely use EQ, but otherwise there's a huge chance it could use rock tomb since the gen 3 AI loves to use moves that lower speed if you currently outspeed them. ultimately i realize with a quick bit of thinking that there's no way EQ doesn't KO motsu, even from full, so i send out mari the gengar on it, who has levitate and takes no damage from it, letting her outspeed and fire off a massive psychic attack into rhydon's pitiful special defense
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unfortunately not pitiful enough for Mari to get even close to a 1 hit KO, forcing her to take a rock tomb in the process. but despite the speed drop, she still outspeeds and is able to take out rhydon with another psychic on the next turn.
out next comes alakazam and i decide alright, i can handle the rest of this fight without gengar, and i don't want anyone to swap in on the obvious upcoming psychic, i don't have any mons that can tank that... so i decide to sacrifice mari
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...but then blue just... goes for future sight??? LMFAO so the hail mary hypnosis that i clicked just in case something like this happened fires off and actually lands!
this massive luck plus some lucky sleep turns allow mari to take out alakazam with two consecutive thunderbolts, leaving her alive when blue sends out arcanine next... but she takes the future sight damage at this point and is left too low to survive a flamethrower from the arcanine, which outspeeds her because of the rock tomb speed drop from earlier... ultimately, mari is still sacrificed. but taking out alakazam was a MASSIVE help, she performed amazingly
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my next move is fairly straightforward - i send out bibi the golem who can survive any move arcanine tosses out and KO it with an earthquake (something i couldn't have done as easily if she fainted against lance!)
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unfortunately, this brings in the pokemon i was afraid of, Blastoise, and considering bibi is weak to and doesn't outspeed both of blue's remaining pokemon, blastoise and exeggutor, there's no reason to preserve her life over getting a clean swap into another pokemon, so i let her go down to a hydro pump.
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MASSIVE salutes to bibi though, her surviving hyper beam during the lance fight and landing the rock slide against his dragonite pretty much saved this run. coolest golem ever
at this point, i have just motsu the jolteon, frosty the charizard, and zur the persian remaining, and even though motsu cannot get the 1 hit KO on blastoise with a thunderbolt, even with the magnet item due to their pitiful special attack, it's still the most obvious choice to get guaranteed damage off, so i send in motsu and use thunderbolt. at this point, i'm pretty relieved because i've essentially won the fight - even if motsu faints from a hydro pump (i'm unsure if they can live one or not), the thunderbolt will get enough damage for zur and frosty to clean up the remainder of his HP, and then frosty can 1 shot exeggutor with flamethrower like planned. but, there's still a little more left to this story...
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motsu actually does live a single non-crit hydro pump on the red, so they're able to finish off blastoise with another thunderbolt, leaving blue with only exeggutor. the answer is obvious - if i just swap into frosty right now, i can win the battle instantly, not even risking getting put to sleep because of the chesto berry i put on them before the fight began. BUT...
remember how i said i was really emotionally attached to my persian? i'm overjoyed that zur was going to live to the very end like i wanted, but they also didn't get to do anything in this fight and i thought that was lame. i knew they had spell tag boosted shadow balls which were super effective into exeggutor, so surely they might be able to take it out instead of frosty, right? and beating blue's final pokemon with a persian in a hardcore nuzlocke was HILARIOUS in my opinion.
this is in addition to zur using shadow ball being a running joke during this run; back when i fought sabrina, i mentioned this before but i was able to grind for the spell tag and 1-shot all of her psychic types with zur, making the fight super easy... and back when i was liveposting that to the discord server, my friend babs said this in response to me making a typo on shadow ball
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zur "blasting bals" became a running gag from here on out so it would be ACTUALLY poetic for me to finish this run with a shadow ball. i HAD to try.
issue: motsu's special attack was still GARBAGE and the bite i used (a special attack in gen 3 as a reminder, all dark type moves are special there) to get some damage on exeggutor first wasn't enough to ensure that zur could follow up with a clean shadow ball knockout. my friends were encouraging me to send out zur anyway, but i really didn't want to because it could go south so fast and if zur DIED in the champion fight i'd be REALLY UPSET. but THEN. i REMEMBERED.
ZUR! HAS! FAKE OUT! I JUST FORGOT!
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and so, with a combination of the free fake out chip and the spell tag boosting shadow ball's power, zur is just barely able to ensure a KO onto blue's exeggutor, winning the fight and the entire run, resulting in maybe one of the funniest nuzlocke end screens ever (to me at least)
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and that is how i managed to beat the freakylocke despite some terrible luck while taking a massive risk against lance LOL. this file is no longer in "nuzlocke mode" and i've been using it for other gen 3 shenanigans, which i will post about eventually...
special shoutouts to the four deaths other than vee the lapras of the run as well:
kris the kadabra, who fainted to an easily avoidable crit from a koffing because i was playing tilted and tired (oops)
serena the gyarados, who fainted to a crit from a random trainer's weezing (less easily avoidable but still sucked, i had put a lot of time into training her!!)
kay the paras, who was sacrificed nobly against sabrina's alakazam to allow a free swap back into zur for the shadow ball KO after the rest of my team handled her venomoth
babs the growlithe, who i was really excited to use because it's a version exclusive and i almost always play leafgreen instead, but who died to a random crit from ANOTHER koffing that i didn't think they'd faint to (the koffing line was enemy #1 of this run i guess)
oh and in speaking of babs, to commemorate the run, they drew this.
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it's incredible. i'm cherishing this art forever. you can see more of their art on their blog @vulturevanity LOL
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cybersteal · 2 months
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OC SMASH OR PASS
tagged by @harellan 🥰
tagging @katsigian @elvenbeard @wraithsoutlaws @my-alternatevy @kharonion @theloverstemperance (no worries if you don't want to or have already done it ❤️)
rules: pretty self explanatory. include physical descriptions or pics, and propaganda. the “other” label can be used for “sexuality misalignment” (ie: oc is femme and you’re gay, vice versa or you aren’t into smashing but a specific thing you wanna do with them like perhaps hug or study them under a microscope idc).
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BASICS
Full Name: Viceroy De’Angelo Torres
Nickname: V, to anyone not a family member
Age: 27 in 2077
Height: 6’/182 cm
Eyes: Colour matched his Kiroshis to his natural dark green
Gender: Cisgender man
Pronouns: He/Him
Sexuality: Pansexual
PROS
Is tall and strong; you need something heavy from the top shelf, he’s got you covered, (but he’ll tease you the whole time).
Fosters a sense of community where-ever he goes! He has pals and acquaintances all over, even in some really hostile areas. Because of this, he’s very resourceful, and always knows a guy who knows a guy.
Have something you’re incredibly passionate about? Congrats! He’s passionate about it now too, and will listen to you talk about your interests for hours.
Is surprisingly patient with people in difficult situations (who didn't seemingly get themselves into said situation), and doesn’t take most things personally. Thick-skinned softie.
Enjoys every genre of music, and I do mean, every genre. Put on your fave tunes without fear of judgement, he’ll always jam out with you!
Isn’t afraid of looking silly if it makes you laugh! He’s secure enough in himself that he’s always comfortable in his own skin, and there’s very little he’s not willing to do to cheer you up.
Is very intense in bed, and tends to get wholly lost in the experience. When he wants you, he wants you bad.
CONS
Is an addict, straight up. Alcohol is the big one, but he also smokes, and uses hard drugs (bar synthcoke after a bad batch almost killed him) and while he’s self-aware enough to know he’s an addict, he isn’t interested in getting clean any time soon.
Has an explosive temper, and a very provocative sense of humour. He has to be reminded to censor himself in situations where it isn’t appropriate, and his anger is very hard to rein in.
Has a very fucked up sleep schedule; in fact, he doesn’t have much of a routine at all. There’s no rhyme or reason to his availability, as he’ll go off to do a gig at 3AM just as easily as 3PM, simply because he wants to, and will just sleep whenever he’s tired for maybe 5-6 hours.
It’s On Sight™ with some folk, and nothing you say will deter him. He’ll go looking for fights when he’s aggravated instead of trying any other, healthier coping mechanism.
Is a natural flirt, and sometimes doesn’t realise just how far he goes with it.
Left to his own devices, he will do some gonk shit if he gets bored. Tends to run toward danger, instead of away from it. Thanks to his heavy-duty protective cybernetics, he sometimes thinks he’s invincible. He’s a reckless driver, and has never really fostered any sense of self-preservation to speak of regarding speed, heights, or running his mouth.
Will hyper-fixate on something to the degree that he won’t answer calls or texts for hours. Doesn’t really feel any urgency to work on that either.
EXTRAS
Has serious FOMO and can’t really keep his nose out of things once he gets wind of them. He’s got a knack for getting himself involved in everything.
Is almost always playing music, or is humming or singing something under his breath. Can’t fucking stand silence.
Enjoys trashy tv – he watches shows like Watson Whore and Little Big Corporats religiously.
Eats a lot of junk food and if given the choice will always pick the nastiest, greasiest item on the menu.
His sense of fashion can be a bit much sometimes, and while he usually manages to pull his wacky outfits off, he understands not everyone else will vibe with it. Just don’t cramp his style.
Owns a frankly ridiculous amount of sunglasses. Yes, you can borrow them.
His love languages are words of affirmation, and physical touch.
propaganda time;
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Okay massive ramble about Sonic code-switching with all of his friends in Frontiers because. It makes me big emotional. Under cut because it's a decently sized one
With each of his friends in Frontiers (Amy, Knuckles, and Tails in that order) Sonic presents a different version of himself, specifically the version that he thinks they need to see at that moment. Code-switching, at least with how it's used in psychology, is defined as when someone, subconsciously or consciously, adjusts their language, behavior, appearance, or any combination of those for whatever reason when talking with different people/groups of people. This can be as obvious as changing languages if you have different friend groups that speak different languages, or as subtle as changing one word when trying to relay the exact same idea to someone. In Frontiers I think Sonic demonstrates this behavior specifically with how he presents different sides of himself to his friends.
With Amy, before she gets out he is very openly worried about her and the situation they're all in, but as soon as she's out he starts presenting himself in a slightly calmer, more compassionate, more heroic way. He's trying to live up to the ideal of him Amy needs to see in that moment: the hero who will never stop trying to save everyone and can't be defeated.
With Knuckles, he's obviously much snarkier and more "free spirited" or so, but he still doesn't show how much he's worried or what his actual emotions are. Any emotional talk they have is instead focused on Knuckles and his emotions and what he wants to do in his future. I think he's presenting himself in a very snarky way because of Knuckles sees him caring a decent amount but not too much, and not showing a whole ton of worry, he's going to think the situation is serious but not as dire as it actually is. He's also trying to stop Knuckles from worrying.
With Tails there's the clearest example of it imo. He's the cool older brother who's always going to save the day. He deliberately hides the worst symptoms of cyber corruption from Tails and again, all their talks are focused on Tails and his future and emotions and all that. Sonic never focuses on himself in this game, it's all about other people. He's always encouraging Tails and trying to help him even in moments where, let's face it, Sonic could probably use some emotional support as well.
He's fucking code switching between his friends to both comfort them, stop them from worrying about a situation which they have very very little power over, and also to stop them from worrying about him.
Also, interestingly, he slowly gets less genuine as the game goes on. With Amy he openly shows worry about the situation to some extent even while deflecting from his own problems, with Knuckles he's fairly obviously putting on a snarky face but still isn't actively hiding anything from him, but with Tails he deliberately hides his own weakness both in conversation and when it comes to the very obvious cyber corruption.
This is all pretty upsetting but imo the worst part about it (emotionally speaking, writing wise this is all the good shit™) is that none of them ever see him at his worst and as such don't realize that he's been putting on a facade for them essentially. Only Sage sees him trying to struggle through the worst of cyber corruption, at that point basically knowing that freeing his friends will lead to himself being trapped in cyberspace. Personally I'd love to see a game in the future (Frontiers 2 please please please Sega) where this gets expanded upon more.
Additionally, there is at least one moment with each of his friends where he slips up in how he present himself: with Amy he shows frustration with the koco leading to her getting angry with him, with Knuckles he shows worry for Tails leading to Knuckles giving him a confused look, and with Tails he is unable to hide the effects of cyber corruption, leading to Tails getting extremely worried about him. But in each case he brushes their emotions off, slaps whatever face he has at the time back on, and just keeps going.
Anyway, that's the post. I would have slapped pictures in here but I am lazy and just relying on the fact that I have a borderline encyclopedic knowledge of basically every Sonic thing that I have consumed in full at this point. The autism is strong with this one
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musical-chick-13 · 9 months
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If I'm not careful, I'm going to get salty about stupid music opinions again.
#OTHER people's music opinions. not mine. MINE are great OBVIOUSLY.#OKAY OKAY. people can disagree with me over the quality of art that is ALWAYS 100% FINE#I just...idk. you can usually tell when the opinions are based on a sense of entitlement and elitism and like...EXTREMELY bad-faith#interpretations? most music opinions I disagree with are from the standpoint of just.#not understanding what the artist was trying to do or willfully ignoring the good parts because it wasn't specifically what YOU the#INDIVIDUAL LISTENER wanted.#(or--not quite as common but still prevalent--refusing to acknowledge the bad because that makes you feel better)#the thing is. when people who ACTUALLY thoughtfully put together lists/opinion pieces--critics like todd or diamond axe studios#or mr 96--even if I disagree with them they make their case in clear terms to the point where I see where they're coming from#you know like *I* didn't see the song this way (for good or for bad) but I can see how THEY would#plenty of people uh...do not approach music opinions like that lol. they'll just#call a band/artist a sell-out without looking at the wider context of their discography or evaluating possible reasons WHY#they would choose to move in that musical direction. they also. MUCH OF THE TIME. don't clarify what they MEAN when they say that either#(also people are waaaaaayyy too precious about clear genre divisions imo but. I don't have the brainspace to fully discuss that rn)#like ''sell-out'' doesn't mean 'has a poppier or more electronic sound' I'm gonna have to put that term on the shelf with the rest of them#unhinged lady screams about music#ugh I really gotta finish that 'discussing the best and worst of the punk goes pop/rock/etc. albums' project I started#(remember those? they sure were a thing that happened!)#maybe THAT'S the New Year's Resolution™ finish a fucking music critique video like I keep saying I will
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monster-gender · 1 year
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Honestly the more vaguely European-esque nobility stories, ascension stories, and fantasy isekai (and the various combinations of those things) that I read, the more I appreciate what Bookworm does.
Like for one, Myne is so much more interesting than almost any other protagonist in those stories that it's kinda funny. But also, I think I'm just too anti-monarchy to ever fully be sold on the specific brand of wish fulfillment that those stories usually have. Also a lot of them are really romance-centric, with any character that's not the love interest just kinda being there. In ascension stories, they usually don't have any actual attachment to their commoner roots, with the families or friends being either complete assholes or footnotes.
Even beyond those general things, there are specific tropes/common happenings that Bookworm does better. Like I've been trying to get into more villainess isekai; and for some reason there's almost always this moment where the MC, after being disrespected by a maid or other servant, will slap them to show her authority or whatever. Like it's supposed to be this badass girlboss moment, but she's just a rich noble girl slapping this peasant (that's usually just doing the bidding of the Evil™ noble rich lady who mysteriously goes unslapped). Cool.
In Bookworm, there are 2 notable "putting servants in line" moments, but they're much different. The first is with Gil, but 1) Myne isn't the one to hit him, 2) He's not being physically punished for being disrespectful, he's getting physically punished for putting his hands on Myne first [and in the lower city, where Lutz grew up, if you throw hands you get hands]. Then there's Traugott: Rozemyne doesn't even care that he was disrespecting her. She only decides to ruin his life when he shit talks Damuel lol
There's a lot more, like Urano/Myne being actually relevant, etc etc but I don't want this post to get longer.
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zephyra-in-the-house · 8 months
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Helloo! I wanted to say that I loved second chances sm, when I found a random chapter last year I read the entire fic in a couple days bc I had to know what happened next, then reread it every now and then while waiting for the updates
I like how we can see both sides of the coin with shadowpeach, how they both care but are still struggling for different yet similar reasons, their struggle with what they went through, dealing with each other's personality traits and habits(their own too) that are still hard to let go of, the glimpses of the consequences of the punishments and their backstory in general
And maybe it's a me thing, but I feel like your Wukong acts like he's a bit aro spec, maybe demi aromantic, and I love that he does, especially while still explicitly loving(and like longing for?) Mac sm
I got that feeling after rereading one of the conversations shadowpeach had in the kitchen when Wukong said something about just wanting to be near Mac, and having him as his best friend was so great kinda like there couldn't possibly be anything better
I know it's probably to show how he grew up, or his personality, and that he's dense (specifically when it comes to reading Mac's feelings towards him) but I feel that just adds to the similarities with the aro experience bc there's a side of the aro community that is blind to more romantic stuff, and romantic-coded gestures or more intimate closeness is just closeness all the same
And your Wukong gives me the impression that he just wanted Mac to be close to him, didn't matter what kind of close, and that he holds the title of "best friend" as a really special thing. Be it BECAUSE of Mac, or maybe since before becoming friends with him, like not just anybody would be his best friend (Also it was maybe to show his trust issues, but still)
I think Wukong said somewhere that he just wanted Mac to be happy to be around him, as happy as SWK was to be around Mac. And I know his inability to put his feelings(love) into words more than referring to a strong or special friendship is probably to show that he's not good with Feelings™, but I like to think that maybe he is enamored in the way a queer platonic love would feel like, so calling it a strong or special friendship kinda does cut it to some degree I think
Also the way Mei (everyone really, but she's more expressive about it, and we see her more than other characters) sees Wukong as a hopeless case, but I think Wukong would see Mac loving him strongly in any way as the best thing ever, as long as it's strong love, he wouldn't mind, love is love, like he just wants to be as special to Mac as Mac is to him
Also I'd love to see them be together even if they don't have the same kind of love for each other, bc the love they have for each other would still be just as strong, and would let them have just as strong of a bond, (in the future, as things are going I have hope, I do hope they end up together in this universe, even if nothing of what I'm saying fits them by the end)
I mean no disrespect to your original idea, or if that's not what u intended, I tried looking through your blog and I haven't found any mention of something similar or headcanons about it
But yeah, idk if u mind ppl putting headcanons on your stories? Some ppl do mind, so idk I just wanted to say that regardless of that hc of mine, I think how you write them is so cool and interesting, and I find that about Wukong really cool even if it's not really where the story is heading and it's been really fun to reread
Also sorry for the weird english, it's not my first language ^^'
First things first:
Thank you so much for reading and commenting!
I absolutely love in depth analysis like this it's so interesting to read and to hear what people think of my story. I 100% love writing this story specifically because it demonstrates how these two are completely different and yet eerily similar people who are just struggling to reconnect with other people despite them both having their flaws and traumatic experiences. It's really fun to write and explore and I absolutely love everything that you said here about it~
Duuude!! I fuckin looooveeee that headcanon! Holy shit that's so awesome! Honestly, I didn't even realize I was writing Wukong that way but now that it's been pointed out I can totally see it!
As someone who is kind of on the ace spectrum, I think I may have just subconsciously made it that way. Just like every other author I know, I have a habit of adding my own traumas/ideologies to my stories so I really shouldn't be too surprised LOL
But don't worry! I don't mind people making headcanons about my story~ In fact, that's my favorite part of writing is seeing how people interpret the story and seeing how they formulate it into drawings or headcanons like this! It's so cool!
Initially, my intention was to write Wukong as being oblivious/in denial about his own feelings and in general just bad with feelings. However, I really love your idea too! It's definitely one of those things where Wukong is just happy to be around Macaque. Macaque is "his person", the one he feels happy and comfortable around, the one he feels he can be open and honest around... and yeah I just realized how much that sounds like the beginnings of a queer platonic relationship LMAO
In any case!
I absolutely love your analysis and I 100% agree that Wukong would be okay with Macaque loving him in any way, shape, or form so long as Macaque feels as safe and comfortable and happy as Wukong himself feels when they're together. ❤❤
Thank you for reading!
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cola-grey · 2 years
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i've been informed that it's Aromantic Awareness Week which means it's the perfect time for me to inflict upon the internet a rare Thought™
the thought is this: i understand why aroace people sometimes push QPRs as the aroace version of romantic relationships (the usual reason that queer people try to put themselves and their community into clean, sanitised boxes: for legitimacy in the eyes of the cisheteropatriarchy) but. but it's not and we're kinda doing ourselves a disservice by treating it like it is, at least amongst ourselves¹.
QPRs are not, fundamentally, Aro/Ace Dating or Dating Lite™. they can function that way or feel that way, but they don't have to. QP is a label for life long best friends, people who gave been mistaken for dating so long that they don't bother correcting it anymore, people who would marry for tax benefits, roommates who are never planning to part ways. it's for people who are always invited to each other's family gatherings even though they're not related or dating.
it's for people who'd go to jail for each other. it's for people who are each other's emergency contacts even though they're "just" friends. it's for alloromantic allosexual people whose most important relationship/s are platonic.
it's for FWB who are never ever gonna catch The Right Feelings but are gonna be BFFs. it's for people whose feelings are fluid, or who can't label their feelings and honestly can't be bothered trying to anymore because the exact nature of them doesn't matter.
asking someone if they want to be QP is just a way to say "hey, you're one of the most important people in my life" — it's just a relabelling for what's already there. it's a shorthand for "we come as a package" in a society where everyone is always trying to tell you that that package is meant to contain a specific kind of feeling that it never will.
and a final, bonus thought: i really don't think QPRs should be A Thing That Should Be Sought Out.² it's extremely understandable to want A Relationship given the whole amatonormativity thing³ but I don't think that desire is ever the basis of a good relationship. if you'll take my advice, put the QP label in a drawer for if you ever need it, and focus instead on just being a good friend, and finding good friends who deserve your good friendship. spend more time with the people who are always excited to run into you. let ordinary friendship be important to you, instead of looking for happiness in a box.
¹obviously it it makes your life easier to call it dating when talking to straight people/your family/strangers, do what's best for you, I'm referring specifically to the Discourse™ in Queer Spaces™ here
²although, i don't think romantic relationships should be either, so
³this Tara Mooknee video is a good primer on amatonormativity if you're not familiar
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walrus150915 · 1 year
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The most random out-of-order Nimona headcanons I've scrambled out of my mind and put in my notes as coherent as I could bc there's a LOTTTT
• I don't think Nimona uses specific names to label her sexuality/gender. Was she in love with Gloreth? Maybe she was. Maybe she was not. Does she like boys? Who knows, she sure doesn't. What's her gender? Nimona. That's it
• I think Ballister did try to be the cis ally™ and figure out the label Nimona would use but she'd just shrug her shoulders and say "I don't know, boss, it seems like you care about it more than I do"
• And even though she's NOT a girl, she uses she/her pronouns because 💥YOUR PRONOUNS DON'T DEFINE YOUR GENDER💥 you may use she/her and not be a girl, he/him and not be a boy, I even saw cis people use they/them simply bc they're comfortable. And that's okay!
• Although she's comfortable with people calling her he/they/neopronouns you name it. Just. Not it/its. You know the reasons😬
• Nimona is left-handed and it's CANON actually I am SO HAPPY as a left-handed person she's just like me fr💥💥
• Nimona isn't a big fan of domestic bliss Ambrosius and Ballister spend most of their time in (plus they're very sappy and very much disgustingly in love, Nimona's stoic organism can't handle their mushiness for the dear life), she's like an independent cat I think: comes to hang out, eats, spends time with her father-not-really figures and goes away for weeks only to come back again. She travels the world my dudes✨
• I think she has a bunch of photos from the places she'd been to and talks about her adventures a lot!
• Nimona also is the best cook of the fam I'm afraid. Ballister cooks, like, the bare minimum to serve himself as a functioning adult (rice, salad, pasta, some meat like you know the deal) but nothing too complicated. Ambrosius is a nepo baby who's probably lived in palaces and mansions with dozens of servants do you really think he's good at cooking😭 as he distanced himself from the Institute and moved in with Bal I think he learnt to cook, still not great at it.
• Nimona though? SHE CAN DO *ANYTHING* like she's madly good at cooking. It might look like she's burning the kitchen down only to reveal that she was putting Gordon Ramsay to shame!
Speaking of BallBros
• Ballister's experience is close to a second gen immigrant. Ambrosius's experience is close to a third gen immigrant. They can't be immigrants bc of the context of the story?? I DON'T CARE☺
• Ambrosius doesn't speak his mother tongue except for like a few words or phrases he's heard at home. His older relatives probably make fun of him for it on family gatherings. His parents didn't teach him because they didn't want him to stick out (totally not self projecting here - yeah I'm a third gen immigrant hiii)
• Ballister tho? I think Urdu was his first language but he learned English along the way
• And it kinda mixes in his head so he forgets the words from both languages sometimes and replaces them with the word from the other one (HA my experience again)
• When he's experiencing hard emotions, be it anger, happiness, sadness, or is overwhelmed, he drops English entirely and just starts bantering in Urdu
• Ambrosius didn't know Ballister was bilingual but when he learnt it? He was amazed and I think... Kinda jealous because he didn't get to learn Korean himself (self projection yeahhhhhh)
• "You know your mother tongue? Damn! I wish I did too!"
• That said, Ballister has no idea how to shorten Ambrosius's name (WHAT THE HECK IS THIS NAME BRO WHAT ARE YOU, GOD'S FOOD???), so he sticks to Urdu endearments, "luv" (in the most British accent possible) and "darling"
People who say French/Spanish are the romantic languages are wrong LISTEN TO URDU OR INDIAN LANGUAGES OR ARABIC. THAT'S WHERE LOVE IS DUDE
• Ambrosius has learnt like a few words in Urdu and tries to rizz up Ballister by saying some basic words like "jaan", "mohabbat" and just😭😭😭 fails😭😭😭 because he's a cringefail man😭😭😭
I remember trying to ask out my (NOW EX😔) gf who's Italian by writing "will you be my girlfriend?" in Italian and I used GOOGLE TRANSLATION🧍‍♂️🧍‍♂️ SHE UNDERSTOOD THAT I USED GOOGLE AND POINTED IT OUT AS A JOKE BUT I CRINGED AT MYSELF SO HARD..... Ambrosius would totally do that too and Ballister would chuckle and pull him in a kiss bc he loves this cringefail man so much
• Ambrosius also serenades like I KNOW DAMN WELL HE DOES. He goes "this one's for you, Bal" with a wink and sings like the sappiest most disgusting love ballad ever and Ballister tries his best not to laugh because that's his beloved boyfriend but also like.... So cringe. So embarrassing😭😭 Nimona has more balls than her boss so she would outright say that it's cringe
• Also. I don't agree with people saying Ambrosius's a jock because have you seen this man?? He's a theatre kid. The worst kind of theatre kid. Even after not being a kid anymore he's still a theatre kid. BRO IS A HAMILTON FAN UNIRONICALLY, OF COURSE HE IS. He makes weirdass references to musicals and giggles like an idiot
• Can we agree that Ambrosius was an awakening for many teenagers because OOOOH BOY he sure would be mine. Some pop news youtube channel probably has a video of him reading the kingdom's equivalent of "thirst tweets", like yknow this type of vids😭😭
While we're on the topic of thirst tweets
• Diego the squire runs a fan page account with edits of Ballister like he's some pop celebrity
• He also may or may not write self-indulgent "Ballister x reader" fanfiction in his off duty time
• Also hc that when Ballister was on the run he saw some "WANTED" poster of him and hang up on the wall like yeah boy's crush is EMBARRASSING (can we blame him? I'm the same with Riz Ahmed)
• Todd would be on the "straight" side of their equivalent to TikTok. You know the ones with shirtless men with the same haircuts who think they're hot when in reality they're not?? That's what Todd and his friends are up to in their free time *throws up*
To wrap it all up NOT with Todd, some super random ones:
• Ballister and Ambrosius force Nimona to take her shoes off ("DO NOT bring your European nonsense in this ethnic household") in their house even though she doesn't even have boots on😭😭 it's just her skin😭😭😭 so she morphs her form to simply be shoeless😭😭😭😭
• Ambrosius knows how to tap dance. Idk don't question it I just think he does
• Nimona plays piano YEAH SHE DOES she's lived for 1000+ years man she can do anything
• Ballister's hair routine is "genetics, coconut oil n some prayers"
Yeah that's it I'll probably make a part 2 because it's not all... These characters have occupied my mind and won't let it go🧍‍♂️
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sweeteastart · 4 months
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Tell me about "Soup"!
Also if you want to share a drawing WIP too, they have one for those floating around. <3
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Before anything else, I must admit, Soup is quite literally a GUY. I also have very little of the way of snippets for him as I'm still fleshing out exactly where I want to start off.
Soup is the hero of soup I created with the cursed link generator by @gaylactic-fire
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He was supposed to be a silly guy having silly adventures but I have no chill so...
I created a whole plot spanning 18 years with political conflicts, a assortment of new monsters, betrayal, a continent wide war, corruption and possession
For Soup :)) The hero of Soup :)
If I sat there and yapped about all the numerous twist and turns of Soup's story, we would be there for hours @lennsart would know, they really had to go listen to all that insanity
Soo for now I'll give you the nice and simple with some more character design and nicknames !!
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I present to you this universe Zelda, Ganondorf and OTHER LINK. Yes, you read that right. The adventures of Soup started with two childhood friends named Link going on an adventure what could possibly go wronng ? Every single thing went wrong
Before I even thought of putting any of those guys in LU which I ultimately did because the brainrot for both was so deep I gave them some nicknames for convenience sake !!
A little bit about each of them :
Soup is a playful guy. Friendly and energetic, he avoids any kind of battle like the plague. It is quite impressive how he slivers his way out of conflict, disappearing in the blink of the eye. Though he is of good company, the twenty year old farmer has nothing to his name. Given he has never had any money in his pockets, it's no wonder he became a pro at evading scornful enemies.
Wine is a full on warlord. She leads her country with an iron first ever since nobles tried to overthrow her family in her very early twenties. Years of corruption and a kingdom on its knees from evil taking over froze her over. She is rather cold but an impartial ruler. Impa helped her decipher and utilise Sheika technology to prevent the fall of Hyrule.
Whiskey isn't the big bad guy™ here. There is some lore behind it. He does remember Demise's previous iteration but it's distant and feels like another person's memories and wants. He is actually a pretty chill guy. Actually, with Wine, he was one of Soup's must-trusted companions during his second quest to save Hyrule.
Land is an energetic and headstrong child. If Soup wasn't his voice of reason, he would be long dead. Always running head first into trouble and monsters, it's a wonder he is still in one piece. He holds half of the triforce like Soup but he is the one that uses Fi most of the time. She resonated much more with him rather than the young careful almost fearful demeanor of Soup.
That's what I'll say for now has some more people asked about the boy !! I hope it's not disappointing lmao he is my silly boy who has the most specific hobby in the world : Soup
About the WIP !
I don't have a lot around as I have the LU/Zelda juice running hard in me and I finish most of my art but here's my current sketch of a Fierce Deity Mermaid illustration
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It's SUPER SUPER rough but that's like my first sketch sooooo I hope it's interesting !!
Thank you for the ask ♪♪♪♪
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