#(that is also where i learned how to eat with chopsticks bc we were at an asian restaurant)

[keii]

wait i havent interacted with mha in years besides seeing a bunch of togachako(?) a little while ago. what even happened in the ending

It's not anything bad bad, but SPOILERS AHEAD-- also also I'm rambling A LOT UHHHHH TLDR: I wished romantic subplots were portrayed better in the MAIN series and I feel like Bakugo's ending was so lack-luster and bittersweet for someone like him... especially being the most popular character in the series. It felt too realistic on portraying the mundane nature of our lives that not everything is spectacular and special and he learned that as an adult. But I also liked the message that we, as humans, don't need to limit ourselves to one thing and we're allowed to grow beyond what we originally pursued/wanted to be.

Rough ending of 430 (which was the first ending): After the final fight between Deku and Shigaraki, Deku loses OFA and becomes quirkless again (eventually bc it fades away.) 8 years passed, the rest of his class moves on to become pro heroes while Deku is a teacher at UA and during those 8 years Bakugo was the lead on this big ass project to fund a totally new, state of the art, AND SUPER EXPENSIVE hero suit for Deku that emulates his previous abilities so that he could be a hero again because Bakugo wants to continue their dreams of competing against each other as heroes. Other 1-A classmates also helped, but majority of it was from Bakugo. And it ends with Bakugo extending his hand out to Deku after he handed him the suit saying "Come." LAKDSJFLASK

I can't fit my whole ass summarization and thoughts/commentary of ch 431 in my tumblr ask unfortunately, but here's the link to some rough translations of the final chapter LOL https://x.com/mikkyae_/status/1863181175570698626 My thoughts on certain parts: There's a class 1-A reunion bc Shoto was celebrating on becoming #2 in the hero ranking. Bakugo gives Kirishima and Deku a ride in his brand new Porsche LOL and Bakugo pretty much asked Deku to join his agency (after turning away EVERYONE else who applied bc he wanted someone to say that they wanted to surpass him) and Deku said "huh? oh... no thanks, I'm a teacher now, so that's what I want to concentrate on, but I'm happy I get to do hero stuff again." And Bakugo told Deku that he should be a bit more selfish and begin to prioritize his needs and wants since he's spent so many years behaving and thinking in a way just for the sake of others. And during this conversation Bakugo just... HE JUST DOESN'T LOOK HAPPY? He told Deku "Because you treat everyone as "special" that means that no one really is special to you because there's nothing to differentiate what they mean to you. You won't realize what you have in front of you if you see everything as the same." (This isn't the exact words but yea.) There was a part at the restaurant where 1-A were catching up with others, talking about how there's so little villains that they think that the world will eventually have no need for heroes like that. And Shoto talks about how he feels about his duty as a hero and because of that he doesn't want him being a "hero" to be the only thing defining him, which is why he wants to begin taking classes on how to make chopsticks and bowls since he loves eating LOL. Which I do like that aspect in this chapter where Horikoshi portrays their adulthood as them becoming their own person instead of revolving everything around being JUST a hero, right? Like yeah they're heroes, but that isn't who they are ENTIRELY. And the LAST thing we see of Bakugo is him sending Deku off and a narration bubble that reiterates Bakugo's words to Deku about how Deku doesn't give special treatment to anyone, so that means no one is special to him, and so Deku uses those words to approach Ochako. I DON'T MIND ROMANCE AND SHIPPING. I consider myself a HUGE fan of romance, but my biggest gripes is that, when a story sidelines the romantic subplot of the SUPPOSED main couple and puts greater emphasis on the MC and heroine's other relationships, this just seems... a disservice to end it where we don't get to see the building of the relationship. Does that make sense? Like I always dislike it when authors end their series on two characters opening up to each other when... I'd rather see that shit happening WITHIN THE SERIES ITSELF. Like why are you making me try and fill in the blanks with the bread crumbs when you yourself could've shown me how great they could've been? And again, Deku's strongest relationship within the series was with Bakugo, and for it to be so... lack-luster... like I don't even care about it in a romantic sense bc I don't ship them like that (but the art I've seen of them is nice HAHA) but IDK IT WAS SO BLAND... LIKE ANOTHER TUESDAY. I mean maybe that's what Horikoshi wanted to portray, the mundane nature of that part of their lives, but that ending for Bakugo just seemed so... sad to me... especially considering how popular of a character he was to his series (I mean let's be real, he's number one in the global popularity poll.) Didn't see him smiling once in there or even a grin IDK LOL HE GOT NO SIDEKICK, DEKU REJECTED HIS OFFER TO JOIN THE AGENCY, DOESN'T BANTER W HIM WHEN THEY'RE DOING HERO STUFF, IDK-- AND THEN TOGA BEING USE AS A PLOT DEVICE TO PUSH OCHAKO TO OPEN UP HER HEART TO DEKU AT THE V END.

Just can't help but think why they never got the chance during those 8 years to talk. I do genuinely love MHA, and I enjoy the message that as we grow older our dreams don't necessarily stay the same and we as humans are ever changing-- It just felt a bit bittersweet in a way? Maybe it's because the portrayal of it kinda takes away the fantasy of how things will be an amazing happy ending. Again, it's like how I felt about Naruto's ending where there were absolute BREAD CRUMBS for Naruto and Hinata's relationship, and then all of a sudden they try to cram and backtrack everything and try to make the feelings make sense in a movie after over a decade of showing me how LITTLE Naruto really interacted with her. Same thing with Sasuke and Sakura, had such little interactions and now you want me to read about their relationship in a light novel??? How are you going to have one of the biggest developments within two important characters in your story IN A SIDE STORY... I just wanna see it IN the actual main stories.

Anyway, my last thoughts, YEAH Deku didn't ask for the suit, but then I feel like Bakugo was expecting a bit... more?? IDK DEKU USED TO LOOK AT BAKUGO AS IF HE WAS A SHINNING LIGHT IN THE HEAVENS, ONLY FOR BAKUGO TO COME TO THE REALIZATION THAT NO ONE WAS EVER REALLY SPECIAL TO DEKU (until Deku decided to take Bakugo's words to pursue Ochako). All those years of Deku chasing after Bakugo and wanting to catch up and as an adult, we get the ending where Deku diverges from that path. LIKE DAMN OK LIKE I GET IT BUT IT'S SO??? IDK WHY BUT IT MADE MY HEART HURT A BIT LMFAO. Idk maybe the ending will grow on me bc I do sometimes like bittersweet stuff... that only makes the fanfics all the much better... BUT I ALSO LIKE THE ESCAPISM AND FANTASY OF PEOPLE ACHIEVING THEIR DREAMS AND BEING HAPPY AND HAVING THE LIFE THEY WORKED SO HARD FOR LMFAOOO

[jeongtokkie]

cultural alienation

I think I’ve slowly come to realise over the last year that I now see my Asian heritage very different to how I saw it when I was in grade school (ages 8-18). And I’m also learning that what I was putting myself through was cultural alienation and resenting the fact that I was half Asian, half Vietnamese, yet not Asian American… This is by no means a sob story or a way to get attention but rather me just sharing my experience so that maybe others, if anyone else, can relate and feel some sort of comfort knowing that they aren’t alone as I felt growing up in a place where Asians were the minority to African American and Latinx communities. 

To start off, I am aware that I am very white passing, but I have enough of an Asian appearance that people often never quite figure out wtf I am. I didn’t meet another mixed Asian-European until my first year of university. So you can imagine how ‘rare’ we were in my surrounding. During my school years, I had almost zero Asian friends and the ones that were, were very much americanised and not of South East/East Asian decent. 

So I forced myself to adapt. I began to resent my Vietnamese name, my legal middle name that showed up on all records, refusing to ever tell anyone what it was because ‘that’s embarrassing.’ One time a teacher called me by it and was humiliating. 

(I think my name was also a special kind of horror because of its dual meaning in the different Asian languages. Its virtually unknown in Vietnamese, probably bc ive never met anyone outside family speak Viet. However, its a very popular Korean dish, also known to non-Asians, and all the Asians surrounding me growing up were, you guessed it, Korean. To most people I was literally a food dish; it was a nightmare. It actually still kinda is, but now im proud of it bc it shows who I am and where I come from without even really knowing me. ‘No no I’m not Korean, I’m Vietnamese’) 

So basically, I told people I was Asian but that was it. Now I realise that my americanised Asian friends were probably just doing the same thing. Assimilating to the culture that engulfed us, taking away our individuality because Asian culture was ‘weird’ and ‘too different.’ The way I lived at home with my family was a secret. No one could know about the little things that made us different. No shoes in the house, just eating with chopsticks, rice at every meal (granted there was a mix of food, both very French dishes and very Vietnamese ones, but that was already too different.) I was different enough as it was by being French, and not at all fitting in the American norms. Speaking French at home was already a shock to everyone (though in my head at the time it was, thank god it’s not Viet) My Franco-German last name, one letter off from an English swear word was enough. So I continued to reject anything related to my heritage. My mom and grandma suggested I wear the traditional Vietnamese ao dai for prom. You can imagine how quickly I shut down that idea. I can’t imagine how hurtful that was for them, to have family rejecting our shared culture. Looking back I wish I’d done it. It’s a beautiful dress that really highlights Vietnamese beauty. Actually, my mom ended up making my dress and the fabric and cut is kind of like a more western version of the traditional look, so maybe deep down I hadn’t completely rejected it but was still trying to fit in nonetheless, especially for such a significant part of American high school.  By that point in high school I think I was slowly more accepting of being Asian but it wasn’t something I was ready to scream from the rooftops. To this day, I have never felt American, because I have such a strong connection with my homeland and nothing will ever take that away not matter how long I’m away from it. Instead, I accepted the place where I have lived most my life and how grateful I am to have this privilege. 

University was the first time I was surrounded by other mixed and South East/East Asian diaspora. True, I was in a place were Asians were no longer the minority but I was interacting with them now. My housemates were Asian; we celebrated the Lunar New Year, had hot pot parties with games of mahjong, we all cooked Asian dishes together (dumpling night was always fun). It was the first time I could really relate to the lifestyle that my mother and grandparents had. That being said, I found that I connected more with the Asians international student rather than Asian Americans. I found that somehow, they were more like me, and that part I don’t quite understand yet, but this is a start in self identity. This was step one. 

And then there were the things that you could watch from Asia itself, which I realise now that I had whole heartedly rejected because I never wanted to associate myself with ‘that.’ Things like anime I rejected because ‘eww they’re speaking a different language and its showing a different lifestyle to the one I was expected to live while being in the US; the animation looks weird, it’s not western.’ It was my reintroduction to Asian culture and how  diverse it is, but also at the same time how similar each country can be to each other. 

Dramas and series were another way to visualise it all. It was like ‘hey they’re like me, they do that like we do.’ 

And then there was kpop and music. This is probably the most recent one and the one that made me realised the internalised block I had put up because of my need to fit in when I was younger. My first years of high school I distinctly remember hearing about Kpop and BTS for the first time. Except it wasn’t a good reaction. It was one that judged people who did enjoy that genre of music. When Gangnam Style came out, everyone mocked it, made fun of the way they talked or dance. So I shutdown the possibility of ever liking a Kpop group. Every time anyone ever mentioned BTS the response was simple, ‘oh I don’t like that’ but until recently, I never knew why. I had never understood that it was an internalise block I had put up myself, because of the judgment of others and the shame of being where I was from, where my parents were from. I had heard their music, I knew I liked it, but liking something like that was just embarrassing and perfect for teasing. I was ashamed of ever liking something that wasn’t from the English-speaking part of the world. I disliked these people because I was scared that someone would find out and make fun of me for it and never thought for a second of giving them a chance. ((And for that, BTS, I am very very sorry. They deserve absolutely no hate. It’s their work to share asian culture and experience with the rest of the world that has greatly influenced this whole realisation actually. Better late than never, right? We’re making up for lost time now))

So to sum up, in my true artistic nature, it was different medias that made me realise my cultural alimentation and internalised phobia of my heritage just because we were from a different part of the world that was too dissimilar in so many aspects. Looking retrospectively at my art practice throughout university, I can finally see the pattern. A lot of my work revolved around culture, I now understand why. (That can be a post for another day) now I feel like I’ve reconnected with the pride that comes from being Asian and living it to the fullest. I’ve connected with my mum in a totally different way and we love talking about our culture and that of the rest of the Asian counties with interesting things we’ve learned. All the varying Asian cultures, especially through food. Cooking has been a love of mine for a long time and now we’re trying out all sorts of dishes from all over, it’s been a great experience, especially to share with my younger brother so he never feels like I did. If there’s one thing I can protect him from, cultural alienation is it. You lose yourself with it, left alone to grasp at false realities and not being yourself which is detrimental to your mental health. It’s that exact experience I would not want to recreate. 

And all these realisations come from shower thoughts (I’m not even kidding lmao) so I’ll end this on a positive, light note. 

Today, I cannot be more proud to be mixed Asian and European. I’m accepting and I couldn’t be happier tbh. I know that I’m not the only one to go through an identity crisis. It makes us human to be different, to have lived different experiences; it’s what makes us all special and valid to be ourselves, and that’s so fucking important. So love yourself, love each other

- 金枝

[fukurodaze]

if i ever get lost

pairing/s: third year!haiba lev x gn!reader genre: fluff, romantic tension aka best and softest tension word count: 3.2k warnings: like, one curse word this was also requested by anon! “3rd year Lev w a reader who’s struggling to pass all their homeworks, projects and quizzes (bc they piled up their works ;;) while thinking of how should they study for college/uni entrance exams?”

special thanks to nat @natszoo​ and ellie @lcnelyinthesky​ for beta reading and helping me w this!! 

LISTEN TO: somebody loves you - jeremy zucker; glitter - benee

lowercase intended!

you throw your head back when you forget the term written on the flip side of the flash card haiba lev is holding. it’s a friday night, far past anyone’s bedtimes, but final exams for the first semester start on monday and you’re not sure where to start. haiba lev, being the person who has nothing better to do, agreed to come over and flip cards with random kanji, english, and biology terms on it.

lev might also be here because it’s an open secret that he’s liked you since first year, and you’ve never answered to his feelings, but you’re thinking friends for now - until you memorise all of this semester’s kanji, english vocabulary, and biology terms, that is.

“the phospholipid bilayer is made up of...”

lev gives you time to think, his wide eyes going between the answer on the card and your thinking face.

“shit, uh, the phospholipid bilayer is made up of two layers of phospholipids?”

“makes sense, but no.” lev answers, flipping the card to show you.

“the phospholipid bilayer is made up of a polar, hydrophilic area containing a phosphate group bound to glycerol, and a non-polar, lipophilic area containing fatty acids...” you read aloud, trying to memorise what’s currently going out your mouth, in one ear, and out again through another ear.

“you know, your flash cards are pretty comprehensive.”

you raise an eyebrow, “is that... a good thing?”

“i mean, yes and no,” he takes another sip of the tea your mom had insisted to bring to guests, “it’s harder to memorise, but it’s better for details. but-”

“but?” you watch as he takes another sip. 

“i think if you really don’t know where to go, just understand the basic concept of everything. for one - what is the function of the bilayer?”

“why do you sound smart?” you question, tilting your head jokingly.

“hey! i am smart! most times! with tests like these that have essay questions, you just gotta learn the basic concept of each term and connect them.” lev advices, recounting his former volleyball captain and nekoma high school alumni, kuroo tetsuro’s, words when lev himself was barely scraping past his first semester finals when he’d just transferred.

“easier said than done in two nights,” you slouch your head on your desk, “plus! it’s not just biology. or exams.”

if memorising all these terms in the span of two days sounds bad enough, you’re still crushed with the supplementary course work and projects due next week as well. 

you let out a deep groan. you’re so tired. it’s like biology information only comes up when you’re studying for english, biology only coming up for modern literature, and mathematics somehow being inserted into the little unknown kanji in modern literature. it’s all too much at once.

“it’s all too much at once, huh?” lev places his head on your desk, only a few inches away from your face. normally, you’d push him away, pull your head back up, or maybe even give him a light slap on a bad day, but today you welcome him. 

you nod, quiet. you haven’t been able to get a breather. it’s essay this, quiz that, lab report here, test there. your mind is blank.

now, lev sits back up on the extra chair from your dining room, “have you eaten dinner?”

“why are you asking... it’s like, midnight.”

“the question still stands.”

you sigh, “nope.”

lev hums. he takes a pen, then twirls it, like his fingers possessed polar magnets that somehow let the pens never fall from his hands. but it does eventually, and when it falls with a plastic click on your wooden desk, lev visibly takes a big breath and says, “do you want to get ramen?”

you exhale through your nose and smile. “are you asking me out, haiba?”

“is it inappropriate to ask you out now?”

damn this tall dork. come to think of it, he’s never actually asked you out despite the obvious ways he’d vouch for your attention in the past. you’re quite surprised, frankly, as he’s always been so loud in the ways he’s wanted to be with you but never really made it seem like anything was going to happen. 

but, hey, it’s late enough for you to put down your doubts about him away. after all, he’s been in your room for four hours, just helping you study. he wasn’t even studying himself - he just sat there, doing almost nothing. and for a guy like him, you wonder how he’s managed to keep there for so long.

“sure.”

lev’s eyes widen. “wait, really?”

“yeah,” you begin to set aside all your study materials, “we can go to a twenty-four hour place in the city, too.”

“alright! let me get you your coat!”

“my coat?” you raise an eyebrow when he hands you the coat you wear the most, feeling both flattered and slightly surprised that he recognises it straight away from your messy room. the boy comes to retreat his coat as well from one of the hangers in your room, and he even offers to get you your socks and boots.

“alright, alright, you don’t have to be that ready to go,” you joke. 

he makes sure there is no noise when you two walk out of your house, through the suburbs of tokyo and to the nearest train to the city. 

“aren’t you two a bit young to be here so late?” the shopkeeper, an old lady, mutters under her breath. you catch it through her croaky voice when you and lev enter the place together, but you pay no attention because all you care to focus on is the smell of broth and your empty stomach.

“for two, please,” lev says, undoubtedly hearing the woman’s remark, but answering with a smile. she smiles too, and so do you, and it makes you remember all the times he’s smiled and you’ve wanted to either punch him or hold his hand. 

today just happens to be one of those days where you want to hold his hand. you shake the thought off.

when you two are seated at the ramen bar, your head falls onto your palm, tilting back to face lev, his chin covered partly by his usual maroon scarf. you had whispered to him earlier on the train what you wanted to order, and lev quickly speaks to the waiter as your tired gaze rises from from the squiggly wooden patterns embedded in the polished wooden table to the boy that’s sitting right next to you. 

at first glance, you remember haiba lev’s face to be satisfying to look at. you remember when he had just transferred to your class in the first year, and you developed the annoying habit of looking forty-five degrees to the right every time you were bored in class, as you thought his face was much easier on the eyes than complex quadratic equations or japanese history. 

for a while you wondered if it was because he certainly looked different - not only was he practically a giant, but he had eurocentric features that stood out from the majority of the student body as well (it also didn’t help that he quite literally and figuratively filled any room he was in). though, maybe, after a while, when everyone got used to the sight of a new face, you kept your line of sight at a forty-five degree angle, just peering above his cheekbones. the same way you’re looking at him right now.

and really, the only word for it is handsome. dashing. good-looking. you’ve always known that, but now that you put it into words in your head, you notice the chiseled jaw, pointed nose and emerald green eyes feel a bit more-

“what you staring at?” his baritone voice cuts through your thoughts cleanly.

you don’t like where this conversation will go. “haiba, are you doing any college entrance exams?”

lev cocks his head to one side, thinking, before nodding, “i think i am. why?”

“how are you studying for them?”

lev clicks his tongue, and it brings you to surprise, “get your mind away from studying! we’re not here in the city at, like, one in the morning to talk about college entrance exams!”

you sigh, “okay, fine. but, still, answer my question?”

“i just do practice problems for twenty minutes every day,” lev shrugs, “okay, now, can we move away from studying?”

you hum lazily, watching as two bowls of ramen arrive at the bar. he had ordered what you told him you wanted to order, both bowls almost identical in smell, shape, size, and content. almost, because lev didn’t have any spring onions in his bowl.

“haiba,” you call, earning a quick call of your name in response, “do you not like spring onions?”

lev nods so obviously that he seems proud. his chopsticks mix the entire bowl together before picking up the half-boiled egg and eating the slice whole. when he swallows it down, he asks you, “you noticed.”

“i mean, yeah,” you reply, “why do you not like them? they’re like, essential.”

lev takes a slurp of his noodles, and then a spoonful of the broth, “i just never liked their texture - which is funny, since my entire family loves adding spring onions.”

now it’s your turn to slurp into your ramen, one bite turning into two, and two turning into the entire content of the bowl. lev seems to eat twice as fast, seemingly having a strategy to cooling down the hot noodles on his spoon while simultaneously folding a piece of pork charsiu in between the loops of each spoonful of noodles, making sure that the little wrap is bathed in a little bit of broth. you find yourself smiling at his act, almost like he has a system of his own when it came to eating ramen - well, he usually had a system of his own when doing just about anything.

the meal is quiet for the most part, with little mumbles of how your tea needs a refill and the ruffling sounds between sheets of tissue to wipe off the broth around your lips. it’s fulfilling, and the look on lev’s face says he’s happy too.

when you two make it out of the ramen bar, 1am feels the same as 9pm. somehow, you’re no longer the kind of sleepy you were when you were flipping through flashcards on your desk, and instead, you’re almost dreading to go home. you think it might also be the neon lights, but there’s some kind of electricity you’re not yet willing to let rest for the night.

luckily, lev doesn’t feel the need to rush. although his steps are big and his voice is loud, he takes his time when you two make the silent agreement to make the walk to the train station as long-winded as possible. his voice is lower, and softer, this time, and when he speaks to you about his friends from his old school, you convince yourself it’s the most interesting topic in the world - because it is. because it’s lev.

when he stops in his tracks, you stop too, watching him go into a small trinket shop you’ve always seen but never had the means to afford to go in. you reckon you might own something from this store, though.

“haiba, you like little trinkets?” your eyes scroll through the shelves of delicate and virtually useless items, eyes landing on a small lion cub made of clear resin with a small blob of gold floating in the middle of its clear body. you’re not usually drawn to any animal trinkets, as you’ve gotten used to decorative objects like bows or feathers or lace, but today you think about the lion cub. despite it looking severely overpriced, you take it in your hand anyway, not noticing lev’s figure coming right behind you.

“do you want that one?” you yelp in surprise when he says that, turning around to find yourself so close to him you could smell the dried raindrops on his padded coat.

“i’m pretty sure it’s overpriced. trinkets are usually overpriced anyways.”

“wait, let me check it,” you hand lev the trinket, “how much is your keychain?”

you furrow your eyebrows, “what?”

“you know, the keychain on the bag you bring to school.”

“oh,” you try to remember the time you had saved up for that keychain, “i think it was about three thousand yen? it’s overpriced. definitely.”

“well, this one’s only two thousand and five hundred. i’ll get it for you.”

“wha- lev!” you whine, “you’re going to make me feel bad- wait what’s wrong?” you see the boy freeze up in front of you, a big smile creeping onto his cheeky face.

he doesn’t reply for a bit, and you’re faced with raised cheekbones and a wide mouth. you try again, “was it something i did? or said?”

“you called me lev,” oh, you did. 

now his smile spreads from ear to ear, and it’s spreading to you. “you never call me lev.”

“huh, well.” you bite the inside of your mouth, “i guess now i do.”

it’s enough for you to let him spend over two thousand yen on a single trinket. you watch as he waits for the trinket to be wrapped neatly in pretty paper and put in a pink cardboard bag, its motif pretty enough to be its own product in the store. 

you stand by the doorframe of the store, mouth ready to open with the words ‘i’ll pay you back’. but it seems like lev had heard you from the future, and before you could do anything, he tells you, “don’t pay me back. this is my gift to you.”

“for exams?”

he grins. “you know, lev means lion in russian.”

the bell of the store rings as you two make your way out, this time really going back to the station. you answer with a ‘really?’ at his fun fact but you keep it to yourself that you’ve known ever since he first transferred and everyone had asked him about it. 

“yeah, and the thing’s a lion cub, so, it’s like you have me all the time!” 

you giggle, walking up the steps to the train platform. “you’re really something, lev.”

lev stretches his arms out, with long limbs you swear ghost your shoulder. you get that feeling again, in your hands, where you just can’t seem to understand why you want to take his hand in yours so bad, so you ask the boy if you can hold onto the bag with your trinket. lev passes it to you, and you hate how you would’ve liked for your thumb to graze over his thumb for longer. you hate it even more when he motions you onto the train, and in a blur, you take his arm, leading him to corner seats on the train. you feel your face heat up. 

ah, so that’s how it is.

now you’re conflicted. not that lev had ever made you feel uncomfortable - no, never - but you had never known how to return his obvious feelings. he would act on them, as always, and one day, as you fell asleep one day after final semester exams in the second year, leaning back into the plastic seat of a suburban tokyo metro rail (which lev thought was very dangerous), lev had muttered in the quietest and most subtle manner, ‘what do i do with my feelings?’

then, in a haze, with eyes barely open, you had moved your head from your seat to his shoulder, painting his cheeks red - dumbstruck. he thought you forgot about it the next morning, and you barely remember, so nothing happened afterwards. yet, when you think of him, you think of hues of orange peeling the sky into purple; of freshly washed school uniforms; of heads leaning on shoulders and fingers intertwined. you don’t know how to answer him.

with lev, there is chatter and laughter and blunt remarks that almost get him slapped in the face. still, there is a box, bigger than the bag your trinket is in, that contains words that you don’t think you or lev have ever said in pure daylight and wake. 

“hey, lev?”

you want to open that box.

“yeah?”

but you don’t know how to do it yet.

“the phospholipid bilayer is made up of a polar, hydrophilic area containing a phosphate group bound to glycerol, and a non-polar, lipophilic area containing fatty acids.”

lev exclaims a series of ‘oooh!’s in delight. 

“was that correct?”

“um,” lev gulps, “i think so? i mean- i think so.”

but you will open it, sooner or later, and it rings in your head when you step off the train and walk into the neighbourhood. right now, nothing is different - the air is not heavier, his eyes do not sparkle like love interests do in the movies, and you do not look through a rose-coloured lens. monday is finals, and the weekend is studying. you tell yourself this.

lev stops at your doorstep, and you almost feel a sear in your chest at the thought of him leaving for the night. 

“so, good luck with next week, y/n.”

you nod, trinket bag in your hands, “you too, lev.”

you find that your arms are opening up, a small pout on your face as lev comes to wrap his arms around you, coats shuffling against each other as you hold each other at three in the morning. 

when you pull away from the hug, you start to ramble a bit, scrambling for new topics to bring up in hopes of just a few more seconds with him - that, and trying to stop yourself from your newfound want to cup this boy’s face in your hands and kiss him square on the lips. you wonder if he would be good at kissing, and you wonder how much you’ll regret having these thoughts tomorrow. 

but even conversation dies when you know it’s getting too cold, so you bid your sweet goodbyes and promise him not to overwork; he reminds you that it’s better to do short but frequent study sessions than fewer and highly intensive ones. you nod, your boots heavy on your doorstep, the hushed sound of keys in doors slowly becoming the only sound you hear as you assume lev’s left already.

until he calls your name.

your head spins fast towards the boy, watching as he makes long strides to stand at your doorway once again, scarf prodding the tip of his nose, so close to your face. he’s red.

“during exams, or tomorrow, or studying for entrance exams- if you ever get lost-” he pants, and unties his scarf from his neck.

“you’ll find me, okay?” the scarf comfortably hangs around your neck now, covering your mouth. he pats your head twice. it’s warm - literally. 

you barely get the chance to say anything before he darts out of your house with a quick goodbye. you’re left confused, flustered, and excited at once, and this time, you think you might have the words as to why. 

you like to imagine you taste sweetness, see eyes that sparkle, and feel butterflies in your stomach. 

“it might not be so bad,” you whisper, looking down at the pretty little bag containing one unnecessarily expensive item lev had bought you.

right; you have feelings for him too. 

then you make up your mind: you’ll tell him next friday. and if your finals stand between tonight and next friday, then, all the more motivation to get through them, right?

you make sure to set an alarm for seven in the morning, kanji textbooks lined up for tomorrow. 

[shhhlikeme]

Nin’s Matchup!

(SFW + NSFW)

Matchup Profile: Sfw+nsfw matchup pretty pls! (1/5) Name: Nin>Female>5’4>Film & sfx/theatrical makeup freelancer>V athletic in MS-HS: ballet, was in volley ball, soccer &Basketball teams>Miss my prime days>Scared to start workout again b/c I’ll get lightheaded>If sum1 helps push me through initial fear, I’ll keep growing from there> Likes chilling in ballet stretch poses>paints, photographs&draws as hobby>draws a pic a day (mostly portraits)>writing a comic atm >Always plan contingencies.🦄

(2/5) >embarrassed of my loud laugh(it’s like Kuroo’s)>introvert>not afraid to lead a team tho> V shy & quiet most times>8/10 times, feels awk in public,like idk what i’m saying, but others told me I seem social>Once I’m comfy w/ u, i joke a lot(occasional mum jokes 2 annoy+Sassy dirty ones w/ S/O)>hides behind ppl who likes 2 talk, but not when they’re 2 loud>laughs @ mistakes/when embarrassed>Will stop mistreatment, even if I get in trouble>values communication&genuine discussions🦄

(3/5) Sings when home alone>competes @ Street Fighter tournaments, trains everyday 4 it>Sings “Hit Me W/ Your Best Shot” when fighting bosses in game&swears melodically when i lose>eats chips w/ chopsticks >make hats out of my cat fur when bored>Workahokic night🦉>likes 2 teach >full convos w/ my 🐱>LIVES in oversized hoodies & flip flops, regardless of weather>no pants@home!>Feels incompetent sometimes, but keep practicing 2 improve>Analytical fast learner>idk why ppl think i look innocent🦄

(4/5)>Forgets 2 speak eng when tired (Thai 1st lang.)>Headrubs 4 s/o every night b4 bed>will miss u but is bad@texting>yelps like puppy when I’m surprised>Unconventionally resourceful: Wire hangers’s fixes everything! >stress bakes & will gets pouty if it didn’t turn out well.>overwhelmed to water my 50+ 🌱 >Doodles on smt (always have a pen on me)when i feel socially anxious> 2 dance sober @ clubs> Wants a stable relationship where we work tgt like a team to bring out the best in one another🦄

(5/5) I like a s/o who is lovable, kind, genuine, mature, independent and caring, but can also joke & be silly with like best friends. NSFW: open 2 try new things>❤️restraints, blindfolds & sensual tickle sex (as lee+ler) but had always been too shy to share it with any1>occasionally self conscious of food baby+stretchmarks>🥰edging/teasing >has a thing 4 height differences (likes to feel smol lol!) & primal play.>Is a switch. I’m so sorry if it’s too much info! Thank you for doing this!🦄

————————————

A/N: HI LOVE @crushzone !!!! I SMILE WHEN I SEE YOU IN MY NOTIFS GIRL I WORKED HARD ON YOURS OF COURSE💖 But no matter whaaaat I’m going to be very authentic in my matchups bc they’re based on compatibility and therefore, without further ado, lemme introduce you to your NEW BAE:

————————————

KŌTARŌ BOKUTO 🦉

SFW:

so you’re a theatrical makeup artist.

Aight.

Mind if I offer you a word of advice? :

RUN

“DUDE THAT’S AMAZING IT LOOKS SO SICK!”

Startled by someone’s loud booming voice, you smudged the eyeliner you were applying to your actor’s face all over their forehead. Whipping around to see who had disrupted your work you were faced with a beautiful black and grey haired owl. A rather tall... and very attractive ‘beautiful black and grey haired owl.’

He started walking around the dressing room like he owned the place, touching everything.

“Excuse me, you don’t have a badge. You can’t be backstage—!”

“Pretty obvious don’t you think, Miss ________?”

You didn’t take his bait, refusing to give this stranger your name. Bokuto shrugged.

“Well since I don’t know your name I shall label thee—Miss HOT GIRL of the 9 Kingdoms!” He nudged the knight actor who was sitting in your makeup chair with his elbow. “Did I sound 15th century ish or what??” The owl turned to you expecting to be praised. “I had to meet the person who made the medieval vampire look so scary in the last act. But that guy with the lights didn’t tell me anything about you being so hot.”

You were speechless because he was hot too

But he shouldn’t be back here so you tried to shoo him out anyway

He allowed you to try to shove him out but he was way bigger than you so nice try sis

When he yawned while you panted because you weren’t able to budge him an inch....

Bokuto wagered that he would leave if you agreed to make him look like the Hulk with your makeup skills for a Halloween party he had to go to

You didn’t really want to because you were a professional and you had no idea who this owl was but because you had 15 minutes until the second act and you needed peace and quiet if you were going to finish your job!!! ....

( This boy was not peace NOR quiet )

You agreed.... but because you answered so fast Bokuto kicked it up one notch

Prince of pushing his luck (king is reserved for Shōyo‘s extra ass)

He pretended to allow you to push him out of the makeup room a few steps but before you closed the door he stuck his foot between the door so it couldn’t close.

Smiling, he peered back in, looking down at you:

“AND...... you have to agree to go on a date with me. Tomorrow night?”

“Ugh FINE!”

Bo removed his foot and let himself out with a bounce in his step.

SERIOUSLY WHO LET THIS MAN BACKSTAGE......

Needless to say, after a few dates, mans won you over like he wins EVERYONE over

It surprised you how comfortable you became with him but he just has that affect on people

***

In terms of your athletic relationship Bokuto does many things:

He pushes you to go to the gym with him for one

He signs the two of you up for impromptu Beginner 30-day challenges that you both must stick to

So every morning for 30-days straight he jumps on you in bed to wake you up:

“NIN BABY TIME TO HIT THE GYM. BABY NIN TIME TO GET IN SOME SEXY GYM SHORTS. MON BÉBÉ NIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIINNNNN—“

“Kōtarō, please shut up.”

he doesn’t

He drags you there and eventually you get back into the swing of things.. killing it in the weight room with your supportive man cheering on your every rep!

You don’t even need him to wake you up during the second challenge!

Your volleyball player boyfriend also signs you up (without permission) for the neighborhood soccer team that Akaashi’s girlfriend is already on

You hated it at first because it was uncomfortable going back after not playing for so long but you soon realized that all the girls there were ex-athletes too and not stars

You formed amazing new girl friendships (especially with Akaashi’s gf) and double dates with them were one of your favourite nights of the week!

You owed that happiness in your life all to your Owl 🦉🥰

He and Akaashi came to every soccer game y’all had and you and the three of you went to all of Bokuto’s games, obviously

Btw you all were FITTTTTT OML

***

In addition...

You already know that your man finds your artistic talents insanely fascinating

On your first anniversary together Bokuto gifted you with a new paint set and new French stand:

Because he admires you Bokuto also tries to draw and paint seriously just like you

You stand over his shoulder and give him corrections and baby owl learns so fast it’s amazing

You two make ‘paint night’ a thing when you move in together and it’s always the most fun event!!!!

Bokuto CONSTANTLY and I mean CONSTANTLY asks for you to add him to the comic you’re writing but you say no because he wouldn’t fit in

He sulks but one day you surprise him by showing him that you drew a cute soaring black and gray owl in the background of almost every outdoor scene in your comic,

you pointed out that it was him

BOKUTOOOO WAS SOOOOO HAPPY

HE WAS SHOUTING FROM THE ROOFTOPS

He called Akaashi right away and almost cried tears of joy hahahahaha

***

Your contingent based lifestyle has saved your reckless boyfriend’s life and career many-a-times

It’s one of the things he loves most about you.

Also, it is important to mention that he is in LOVE with your laugh

Bby owl does anything to hear it and showers your face with kisses when you laugh to draw it out

He loves you so freaking much

When you don’t make sense and speak gibberish in public because your awkward side randomly comes out......your boyfriend loves to make fun of you:

“Huh? Nin, that wasn’t Japanese, that wasn’t Thai and that definitely wasn’t English. What planet is my adorable baby girl from, again? And how do I return her in exchange for a floating space car instead?!”

suh cute

All of Bokuto’s teammates really like you because you work in conjunction with Akaashi which means you actually have the magic ability to get Bokuto out of emo mode even faster than his best friend 🤯🤯🤯

When he’s at an away game in emo mode his teammates will literally FaceTime you and point their phone in his general direction

“Hey, Kōtarō!!!! Look, Nin’s on the phoneeee!”

Bby owl turns around slowly when he was sulking in the corner and when he sees you on the screen he’s running and jumping on whoever is holding your phone.”

“Kōtarō baby. You’re going to stop this emo mode right now. If not I won’t let you paint me nude like we discussed.”

mans was like: 😨😨😨😨🤗🤗🤗🤗🤗

YEP the next second you see him hitting his best practice spikes and his teammate thanks you profusely

You do this several times until Kōtarō just knows to not go into emo mode anymore because you won’t be happy

A year into his professional volleyball career The Black Jackal’s coach sent a surprise fruit bouquet to your work one time:

With a note that read:

To Nin,

Thanks.

Thanks a lot.

Love,

The Team

***

I know you don’t really like people who are considered “too loud” and Bokuto is like...... “MEGA LOUD 🎙 “ but you and Akaashi work together to quiet your boy down as he gets older

He’s perfect

And you love him

***

OKAY THIS IS THE FUNNIEST day THING:

You know how you like standing up for people (even strangers) and stuff?

Well one day, you and Bokuto get caught on a show called WHAT WOULD YOU DO?

Where the two of you cussed out this cat-abusing actor on the show in a convincing scenario!

It was PRICELESS

Bokuto literally tells everyone that y’all are movie stars because of it 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

***

More in the relationship:

Bo is always singing with you 💞 when y’all make breakfast it becomes a national sport to sing at the top of your lungs!!

And when he sees you eat chips with chopsticks he’s pulling a Hinata “🤩🤩🤩” face .

He begs you to teach him how

So you try

......and try

..................and try

He can’t do it bruv 😞

You see bby Owl’s emo mode return for the first time in like a year when the chip shatters between his sticks again

This time, you have to enlist Akaashi as the FaceTime saviour and Keiji just tells him:

“Bokuto. You should prefer eating chips with your hands anyway. It gets to your mouth faster.”

cue Bo’s 🤩🤩🤩🤩🤩🤩 face

........And all is well again

There’s more:

So you’re a workaholic?

Bokuto is fine with that. He just makes you promise that he gets to take you out on your lunch breaks a few times a week or whenever he can

He’s so sweet and your coworkers are BIG jealous of your relationship

Your man BEGSSSSS you to teach him Thai but you find it too hard so when he’s travelling on a long flight he spends the time learning the language on YouTube (and actually get decent at it) so that he can understand you when you’re sleepy😴🥺💕

When Bokuto surprises you by wishing you goodnight in Thai before he falls asleep (while you’re giving him head rubs), your heart explodes BECAUSE why is he the cutest thing in the world ?!?!?!

RELATIONSHIP COMMUNICATION:

You don’t text/you’re bad at texting? That’s fine, mainly because bby owl is so busy with volleyball anyway, but if you don’t text him back when he is feeling needy the boy will call you 20 times in a row

When you finally pick up, your heart is beating like thinking it’s an emergency

But he will answer saying:

“Oh, no emergency. I just want booty pics. Please, Nin babyyyyy?”

you’re like: 😑

ANOTHER CUTE THING YOUR MAN DOES?????

AIGHT:

It’s cringey but.......

When you’re at work all day doing makeup and he’s home he will send you pics throughout the day of him taking care of your plants like they are y’alls newborn children:

His text:

Baby look!!! Ollie the Orchid grew to 7 inches today!!! Yesterday he was 6.8 inches!!!!! They grow up so fast 😭😭😭”

Your reply:

Not quite as long as your dick, Bo

His reply:

I hate when you get me horny when I’m trying to take care of the kiiiids 😭😭😭😭

Dkm

Of all the factors you look for in a man, Bokuto has all of them

Like I said he becomes much more mature when you and Akaashi are his closest compadres

What people don’t know is that Kōtarō is actually very mature he is just a hardcore optomist (besides emo mode lmao) so people often mistake him as immature or dumb

But He’s far from it and you see that everyday

It’s why you fell for him

When dealing with serious issues that life has to handle, you see a different side of Bokuto, a real side, the side he shows in every tough volleyball game when he makes you metaphorically step behind him so he can deal with any problem that comes your way

He would literally withstand all your battles if that meant you’d remain happy forever

We stan a relationship like yours💞

NSFW:

okay so you know how you chill in ballet 🩰 stretches sometimes?

THAT DRIVES KŌTARŌ WILD.

It turns him on so much and he is constantly testing how flexible you are in the bedroom

When you keep meeting his expectations he is POUNDING you cause he is so turned on

He fucking loves it

It also turns him on when you’ll be acting shy and stuff but then randomly you’ll lead your neighbourhood soccer team like a BAD BITCH

When he sees that he’s already asking Akaashi how long until the game ends because he’s horny:

Akaashi deadpans. “Too much information. And the game just started 3 minutes ago. Get a water and calm yourself.”

Bo is sad but it makes for one hell of a I’m-proud-of-you sexscape when you get home from your game!!

Your dirty jokes also turn Bokuto on.

A lot.

A lot a lot:

“Bo.....I was joking.”

“I know but if I hear the word ‘dick’ coming out of your mouth I automatically think of you blowing me so now I want us to go home.” He whines.

You sigh. He’s lucky he’s so fucking hot.

When you’re playing street fighter every night this boy will not leave you alone until you cockwarm him

“Nin can you pleaseeeeee warm my cock while you train? I miss you.”

Your concentration turns him on so he has to ask nicely 😊

You love his dick so of course you oblige

Bby owl is so happy just sitting there being in your company and in your warmth but sometimes or every time he ends up thrusting into you

Sometimes while he’s giving you deep slow thrusts he orders you to keep playing or he won’t get you off

Damn 🤤

Let’s not forget also that you drive your man wild by walking around the house in hoodies all the time and nothing else

Every day, another hoodie will be found in various RANDOM places in the house because Bo flings it off you before he makes love to you wherever, and they go missing

Finally, when you get all sad and pouty because one of your baker trials goes to shit (ruined chocolate brownies this time, boo 💔), your boyfriend is taking your hand gently in an instant, leading you to the bedroom:

“Don’t be sad my beautiful girl, you know how much I hate seeing you sad. It makes me sad.! Here, come in the room and sit on my face—I promise I’ll make you feel better.”

WELL DAMN—😳💦

Maybe you should screw up brownie recipes more often.

————————————

A/N: do you know the show what would you do??? Watch it on YouTube if you haven’t haha I couldn’t stop thinking about you and Bokuto being on it after reading your matchup profile!!!! I hope you liked it bb! Give me all your reactions, I want all the smoke 💞💞💞

[littlemusings2020]

Notes on Rice

The first thing I purchased in preparation to move out of my mother’s home was a rice cooker from a closing Zellers (I still use it religiously)

I had never made rice until I was living on my own, my mother never wanted me in the kitchen

It’s a huge privilege to appear ‘ethnically ambiguous’, the first time I remember talking about my background was at my new school in Grade 2 with my crush at the time, he responded something like “me Asian, me so horny, me eat rice”, I was mortified and stopped talking about it until years after (he never saw me eat rice)

I can only eat rice with chopsticks or recently, my favourite spork I took from Lufthansa Airlines, everything else seems morally wrong

I first suspected I had celiac disease while on my paid internship in Berlin, Germany. Germany is land of bread, but I was pretty content with only eating rice. My most frequented restaurants were the Thai restaurants on Gleimstraße and the Middle Eastern late-night fast food (found all over the city)

When I used the rest of the Shantz styrofoam cooler money to visit my Indonesian family in the Netherlands for the first time, I ate Rijsttafel or ’rice table’ (a Dutch dish adapted from nasi Padang) alone in an Indonesian restaurant in Amsterdam before travelling to Tilburg, ‘nasi’ means ‘rice’ in Indonesia, I used to be obsessed with Indomie brand nasi Goreng instant noodles but it is made of wheat noodles, not rice, I need to learn how to make the traditional rice version

Right now, I have jasmine and sticky rice stored in my designated cupboard, lately sticky rice has been my favourite, but I want to see what kind of rice is best in soups

The first time I had rice in soup was during my last birthday weekend when I was staying with Kristena. It was a Vietnamese soup with bok choy and regular white rice, I’ve made it multiple time since that afternoon

I once started resenting a former lover when they told me ‘pureed soup is fancier and better than broth soup’, my favourite soups are broth soups,  whole rice definitely goes better in broth

My old boss at a job at Chinatown Centre made herself a backpack out of one of the big fabric rice bags and I thought that was so cool. She asked me to bring her any bags I had and to ask my other Asian friends for them. I agreed, but had never purchased one myself until after this conversation (I’ve still been thinking about making one of those backpacks but haven’t yet, Segal’s has tiny bags with handles that I’ve been eying, maybe it could be a cute handbag)

My friend and colleague, Racquel Rowe, did two performances this past year where she washed rice, washing rice isn’t common in Canada, but she told me it’s common in Barbados where she is from, I wasn’t surprised about rice washing because I wash my fabric bag rice, it says to do so in the instructions, I felt comforted by her performances and I wish i saw them live

My French roommate made me rice the first night I moved into my flat in Tiohtià:ke (Montreal) and it was so soggy, they didn’t use my rice cooker and I lol’d and then the next time they made rice they did it again lol steam your rice, don’t just boil it

I am generally a bad cook but my Virgo Venus structure comes through with my rice

My mother bought me Minute Rice a couple years ago and I was so offended, I made her take it back

I asked my friend Kaythi about emotional connections to imported food while researching for Frying Krupuk and she told me “I remember feeling really alien and singled out for the kinds of foods I ate but idk whether this was real or imagined bc it was so long ago 😂I was also being bullied super viciously @ school around this time. my azn-ness feels very rooted in food bc it was also one of the only ways I ever got to experience anything from any asian culture and the only thing it made sense for my fam to practice since my burmese family is really dispersed...RICE! My partner and I keep three different kinds of rice in the house bc one of is is inciting it’s indispensable 🍚🍤, we always have basmati, Thai jasmine, and calorie rice in the house, I don’t eat as mush rice as I want tho”

The last time I bought rice was in Waterloo, ON at the beginning of quarantine. I went to the Bridgeport Sobey’s and felt stressed from the empty shelves and panic buying and left to go to T&T where it was quieter with better stock. I only shopped at T&T until I left mid April

DM me your favourite recipes with rice xx

b. wijshijer/ shrimpychip

[musicdork]

ooooo here lemme send the clip the tik tok was referencing!! that itself is damn hilarious— https://youtu.be/mjC-KpbeOSQ

also honestly for a split second i’m like shit we ARE mutuals...right? so now i double check every time i send a message/read ur replies AAAAAAAAA LOL. and yo i hate to be such a dorky dork but honestly i want to go to the roman collesium just so i can aesthetically jojo pose at the top and take pics. like b r u h . tbh tho italy is very beautiful and warm and stoney on the ground. i bet youd b able to use some of ur italian if u go!! 🤠 have u ever traveled outside of the country?(assuming ur in the US right now lolz) if so where!!

so random but i jus saw that chocolate ice cream thread and like.......dont mean 2 butt in....no offense to op but chocolate ice cream is bomb as HELLLLLLL. like for real. its the best flavor. no exceptions. none

i see u ask for specification on what i plaaayyy::i am a pianist, percussionist, and singer-in-the-shower-ist🤪🤪 my major is a performance major(aka learning to professionally audition/prepare for chamber groups and orchestras as a career) w/ an emphasis on percussion. its v hard but if i ever make it to carnegie hall or something i will personally send u a vip ticket i promise<3

(also i’m barely passing this one class too LOL but YOU CAN DO IT u got school in the bag!!!! i believe in u!!! )

DONT B INTIMIDATED y u intimidated???? bc i can hit a cow skin cylinder to elicit noise from it?!?!?!! bc i play chopsticks with my two pointer fingers on the ivories??!?!!! half the time i play meme tunes to warm myself up on piano. u could pour soup in my lap and ill probably apologize to u. silly goose.

oh and what kind of plans are u setting out to do!! if u dont mind me asking😗✌🏼✌🏼 aint nothin wrong with a sleep day u gotta get ur rest. tho i do hope u can accomplish ur tasks soon :) did u eat anything yummy tonite??

ok ok k i hope u have a nice night u night owl. im boutta pass out tbh. —ur little sneaky stealthy pogchamp of an anon👾 (thx for that kakyoin vid btw :) made me blush tbqh) i hope u saw the lil josuke reblogs..maybe u did find me? altho i myself am not sure if u did or not..all in good time my pal. :)

OH I SAW THAT!! i think this is the first episode,,, he forgot to wash his h a n d s

bro if ur gonna jojo pose there pls take me with u hehe. i take good pictures i swear >:^ also ye I'm in the US i kinda assumed u were too??? djsns since you're only an hour behind! i have never,, been out of the States but boy do i want to!! im hoping to travel abroad my junior year!! or for a semester :) !! i just,, wanna travel,,, hhh

ALSO I LOVE U !!! THANK U!!! ty doesn't like it for some reason it makes me sad. but to each their own, u know?

how are u,, so damn cool i,, [ stares at hands ] u r so cool i, sobs sjsnsn have u played,,, giorno's theme at all..? while warming up... :0 my brain is too tired to think of other jojo themes hhh it be like that sometimes. but HEHE!! i get,, the Cool Guy access,,, fuck yeah 😤

what are my plans... wtf are my plans Uhm. my plans after school?? no fuckin clue but i have a feeling i just wanna Help ppl. plans for the day? im gonna play animal crossing for the first time in a while with my best bud. it's been Months since i last played oml 😭😭 i need to clean my island!! get rid of them weeds,, >:( idk how my villagers are tho,,, i hope they're okay lmaoo. but other than that I'll probably just fuck around on tumblr n my other socials :')

i might have,, gotten the josuke rbs,, if they were with other people then yes! you sneaky bastard :')) throwing me Off like that 😤 one was super painterly n it looked so Good!! everyone in the post did and hhhh why are they all pretty in their own right :( my heart can't take it 😞

dinner was good tho,, very yummy,, 10/10 would recommend. did u eat...and drink some sorta liquid? if not i,,, idk what I'll do but I'll do something!! >:(( i hope u have,, sweet dreams <3 dream of kakyoin for me,, and yourself, definitely urself hahah

[justfollowmyhansel]

October 13th – By the Gold Light of Your Halo

And the end of this sentence has never been truer. I was almost close enough to touch him…. (Not quite, but I sort of tried to a couple of times since I was literally second row aisle seat.) But I’m getting ahead of myself. Or is that a-Hed? You decide.

I was actually awake when Miya’s alarm went off the first time. Pretending to be asleep, but I’d checked my phone a time or two already.

Shortly after, my mom texted saying she’d talk with my favourite person at the bank about my debit card. I had more than enough to cover what I had tried to buy with it and yet…. Both she and Vicki were going to try to get down to the bottom of this because clearly, this wasn’t good.

I decided to answer the message when I actually got up. Which as it happened was about an hour later when John posted.

Of course 4G in Japan is still super slow and it takes forever to load, but whatever. It’s still John.

The previous afternoon, it was announced that there was no stagedooring. A little disappointing, but the stagedooring aspect was making nervous. What if I said something stupid to him like ‘You were great except for .“ Or "What the fuck is up with your wardrobe? Don’t you know how to dress yourself?” What if I lost the ability to speak my first language? (“John, ich lebe dich. Du bist der Hellstestern, meine Schöner.”)

I mean…. That’s the sort of thing that he might appreciate more if he actually KNEW me and knew that I was meaning that as teasing and that I wouldn’t actually want him to change the way he dresses or that I’m not actually all that fussed about whatever line changes there were (that weren’t supposed to be there.) I know it must be frustrating as hell for him when he forgets his lines or loses track of where he is in the script, but I think it’s cute. Very Hedwig. Very rock n roll. Very…. Robbie Williams. That man sold out STADIUMS and still would forget the lyrics to his hits. (Now he has a teleprompter XD)

Miya and I had breakfast. I had bought a waffle-thing at the store the previous night, but instead I tried some of the raisin sandwiches that I had purchased the night before. They were a sort of hard biscuit cookie with a soft, almost whipped, crème with raisins in it. And tea made with the lactose free coffee creamers that Miya had generously bought for me the night before.

We packed up our stuff to go to the theatre and ride the train. On the way down, I photographed every few stops so that I know where I’m going. On the way in, I saw an ad for a record store. Tower Records. I briefly daydreamt about running into John there. I know we probably wouldn’t if we went, but…. Still. Records. John. Not only two things I love, but things that actually go together.

The station we arrived at was actually under construction, the usual signs in English and Japanese having either been covered or taken down because of the diversions. In their place were signs reading only in Japanese and with arrows. I took photos of the ones I needed to remember to either turn at or follow.

Miya showed me around the Hikarie a little. In the back of my mind, this word sounds familiar to me, but it’s not until the next day that I can begin place it. The tour is more or less just walking by the various shops, occasionally discussing what they are, but more often discussing what’s likely going to happen with the show or Japanese culture questions. We actually went to lunch shortly after arriving.

For lunch, we picked the sushi 🍣 place on the 6th floor. The entire 6th floor is restaurants. Some of the other floors have restaurants and cafes too, like the 11th has a cafe right outside of it, but I wouldn’t know that for a few more hours.)

We go in and are seated.The restaurant has a very Deep Space Nine ordering system. You can click for your own language on the wall-mounted menu, there’s pictures, you tell it how much of everything you want, and the food comes on a short little track thing that looks like one of those short train things you used to see in westerns. And there’s a sushi conveyor belt. Very cool.

Miya remembered that sometimes shops in the Hikarie give discounts if you have a ticket to that day’s/that night’s show at the Orb. She calls it up on her iPad and then calls over the waitress. We get free drinks because we’re seeing Hedwig! I ordered tea, Miya stuck with the water and matcha powder.

We cancel the drink order off of our digital menu and then get down to actually ordering lunch. Miya orders one of the lunch specials, whereas I go a la carte. 

The first things I picked were a tuna roll and two pieces of salmon avocado. I miss avocado. I miss when avocados didn’t cost $5 per fruit…. The food arrives and is incredible. The best salmon with avocado I’ve ever had…. It was one of the few times in my life that I have ever had avocado that was light and melt-in-your-mouth and the salmon was So. Fresh. just… so fresh. 

I then opted to try some of the conveyor belt, pre-made sushi that was circulating around the restaurant. I grabbed the first thing that looked interesting – some small fried shrimp on top of a small pad of rice that was then all wrapped in seaweed. It had a nice, surprising yet mild heat to it. Feeling less certain in my ability to put the whole thing in my mouth, I picked some of the shrimp off of the first piece with my chopsticks. I also tried squid with a little bit of rice.

What I had forgotten about squid from the other time I had it at Wasabi is that it’s a very chewy piece of fish that’s hard to break pieces off of. Which in turn, makes it very hard to eat any of without putting the whole thing in your mouth. And when you swallow it, gives the unpleasant sensation that the whole thing is about ready to come back up.

The last unique thing I ordered was a couple of pieces of red fish on top of rice. I think this one was also tuna, but I’m not sure. And another salmon with avocado.

After we ate, Miya and I went to Bic Camera.

What necessitated going to Bic Camera was getting printer ink. And what necessitated the ink was that Miya wanted to give me maps to help with the getting around. At this point, I was just happy to be along for the ride. I’d never been to any of these places and possibly wouldn’t get a chance to go to them again anytime soon so why not? Just because it’s seemingly mundane, doesn’t mean comparing the differences isn’t interesting. We arrived at Bic Camera and were told that we actually needed to be in a different building for Bic Camera. Later, looking at the map of Shibuya that the Hikarie had for tourists, I learned that there are actually three buildings for Bic Camera in a relatively short amount of space. Who would have guessed!

Once at the correct Bic Camera, we went upstairs to get the printer ink. This building of the BC was set up like a department store, but entirely for computers, cameras, phones, and other electronics with a single floor dedicated to laptops, a different one for printers, a different one for phones, and phone cases hanging off of the edges of the levels as you rode the escalator up. This is the one of the stores I would love to have had the time to truly explore, but this was one of the few days where everything didn’t seem like it was going in such a rush to go here or go there or get this and get that.

We bought the ink and returned to the initial building for Bic Camera. Miya showed me some of the shampoos on offer since I had mentioned wanting to buy some the previous night. I explained that I had meant that I would buy her more of her own shampoo as a thank you for letting me stay with her! (They didn’t actually have her kind of shampoo and then we both forgot about it before I left Japan.)

The next thing on our list of things to do was to pick up the movie ticket for How to Talk to Girls at Parties. About two weeks before the start of the trip, it was announced that John was going to have his Japanese premiere of the film at the end of the week he was performing Hedwig. Of course, the tickets were again done by lottery and while we had won tickets to all of the Hedwig performances, I wasn’t certain that our luck would hold out enough to substantiate changing the plane ticket and extending my hotel reservation on the off chance that this would be the thing we weren’t lucky on. As a sort of consolation, when it was announced that fans could buy advanced tickets for when the movie actually opened in Japan, Miya offered to buy a ticket and give me the promotional pins that came with it. I had thanked her and offered to buy the ticket for her, again as a way of thanks. She had that said she did want to see the movie, that wouldn’t be necessary.

What was interesting then and what’s interesting to me still now is how many buildings in Japan have that department store structure. Where either it’s a multi-floor building that all of the shops belong to one business and you pay on at each floor or where it’s multiple businesses that are still interconnected and you have to walk through a shoe store to get to a dollar store. Being from the midwest where department stores are kind of the sole purview of malls and most businesses only get a single, possibly up to three levels, of their own, this was a fascinating anthropological difference. It wasn’t until I got to Osaka that I started to see more stand alone single story businesses.

We picked up the ticket, and I picked up some flyers for the movie. Miya stuck the pins and the ticket into her bag so that they wouldn’t get lost in my relatively huge Hello Kitty duffle bag that I had brought with me to carry my things and then we went back to the Hikarie. We still had over three hours before the show was supposed to start and had exhausted all of the errands that we had to do that day. 

Miya asked what I wanted to do, if there was any shops that had caught my eye, or if there was any particular type of store that I wanted to visit and I remembered seeing the billboard ad for Tower Records on the way in. Off of the prompt ‘record store’ (cos I couldn’t remember the name), Miya found where we needed to be and we set off again, past Bic Camera, and arrived at the record store.

What I was looking for most was David Bowie or Queen things. Both musicians are ones that I have numerous antidotes and stories both from and about in Japan. Freddie in particular absolutely adored Japan and had his house decorated in a Japanese/Victorian England style and David, well Japan was the first time that David felt like a success. (In addition – the story that he told in one of Mick Rock’s books about how he was given a beautiful cape that had writing on it, that he used in his Ziggy shows a lot, but didn’t know what it meant for over 20 years. It was his name.)

We entered on the second floor, and like I usually do in record stores, I found the clearance/discount section on the floor I wanted and started looking through. I didn’t find anything for David, but I did find some Beatles and George Harrison. It wasn’t until we started looking through the aisles that I found David. His section had the last photo that was ever taken of him as the header section – it’s by Jimmy King, it was taken on his birthday, I was not expecting to see that photo on that day. I started looking through the collected CDs, finding a few that I took photos of for later purchasing or eBay searching. (At this point, I was still using the money converter to estimate about how much each thing would cost.) All the while, I’m telling Miya little antidotes about David or about the recording of each particular album, session, or concert. It’s the first time this trip that I nearly start crying…..

Eventually, we leave the section – or rather, I decide that we have to leave the section – and go looking for Queen. It occurred to me in the process of making that decision how silly it would be to be crying on the day that I was seeing Hedwig for the first time.

Along the way, I found Freddie’s solo section. The price for his singles was just a little too high for what I was willing to pay at the moment, but I took yet another photo of the back for later research when I had the time and wasn’t anticipating potentially buying a lot of merchandise at the show. So far, the only things that had been announced were the t-shirt and the program, but in the back of my mind, I kept thinking that more things might have been announced. And of course, dropping a LOT of money on Hedwig merch was the reason I had come out to Japan right now anyway. Well, that and seeing John.

Unfortunately, the Queen section was the same story – I either already had it or didn’t want to pay as much as the asking price for it. According to Miya, it’s because of the import charge. I found this highly ironic since in the US, it’s usually the Japanese things that have the extreme import charges. 

Since that was it for that floor, after a brief flick-through of the clearance section up front, I purchased a David interview CD, a small magazine for my mother with The Smiths on the cover, and a bag of record sleeves since they were cheaper to buy here than to wait to get in the US.

We walked back down to the floor that we thought Ataru’s music would most likely be on and outside, I picked up some more flyers and booklets for things that I thought sounded interesting or cool. I ended up buying one of Ataru’s CDs – her most recent – before we moved onto the last floor we visited that day: soundtracks and movies.

That particular Tower Records had nothing for Hedwig nor RENT on the day that we visited, but I was able to snag some photos of the press for Trainspotting 2 (my favourite film with a US release this year) before we left.

We headed back to the Hikarie again and still had about an hour and a half before the show was going to start. Miya asked if I wanted to go get something on one of the lower levels or at the cafe outside the theatre, but since re-entering the building, it was all about Hedwig. Every part of me was focused on Hedwig. And like I usually am before seeing a show I’m highly anticipating or talking to a crush, I was trying not to vibrate out of my skin. Definitely too nervous to eat.

We went to the convenience store outside of the theater, this time a Lawson and not a 7/11, and I bought a pack of something that was shoved into my bag for later and a hot bottle of tea. The flavour of the tea was what I’d imagine hot barley to taste like, not bad, but not really….flavoured at all. Not that it mattered. Not that any of it mattered since it was getting down to ACTUALLY seeing the show.

A few minutes of nervously waiting outside the theatre passed and Miya opted to take another swing around the building again. We take some photos out of the windows at the now, very night time, Tokyo and then literally walk around the building. When we return, the doors have opened to go upstairs. We take the escalator, show our tickets, and are allowed into a room with posters advertising the program, a tv screen showing the currently static stage, the merchandise booth, and the many, many cosplayers for the evening. (While we had been waiting, I had looked up to one of the upper levels and very, very briefly mistaken one of the cosplayers for John.)

I bought the merchandise for myself and for Risa, Miya bought a program for herself, and then we went to find our seats. Our SECOND ROW seats.

They were playing Love Will Keep Us Together as we sat down and I was trying not to completely freak out since it’s one of the songs mentioned in the script! And then immediately after, Young Americans by David Bowie. Another song referenced in the script!! When they played Lust for Life by Iggy Pop, I figured the show would be starting since it was traditional that Iggy was usually the last artist played before the show started. In Japan, it wasn’t. Light My Fire by The Doors was.

And the show started with Ataru coming from one of the side doors and announcing “Ladies and gentlemen, whether you like it or not, Hedwig!!! Hed-wig! Hed-wig! Hed-wig!” getting the audience to cheer and chant for Hedwig, clapping for her arrival into the venue. I was turned, looking at Ataru, clapping of course, chanting for Hedwig’s arrival when the show started.

On Broadway, Hedwig had descended from the ceiling; Off-Broadway, she had come from the back of the venue, sauntering up to the stage…. but here, here Hedwig was standing behind the screen projecting an image of the Berlin Wall with graffiti on the Western side and stark nothing on the East. As the audience chants, the wall develops cracks in the middle, eventually exploding from the middle with Hedwig standing triumphant, beautiful…. in the sudden divide between East and West. I… had been looking in the wrong direction.

I whipped my head back towards the stage so quickly you’d have developed second-hand whiplash watching me.

Part of the performance, I’m watching the show completely amazed that this is happening, that this is real. That I’m actually in the same room as my favourite show being performed. I’m not sure I blinked the entire time I was watching the show. The other part of the performance, the part that features Yitzhak more than Hedwig, I’m still looking at John, looking to see how he is reacting to Yitzhak as Hedwig or simply being Hedwig without speaking and without making grand movements at that point. Mostly just…. being. To me, it’s fascinating, being in the second row. Being able to see all of the little reactions, expressions, costume alterations behind semi-opaque screens. In a way, it’s like a “How It’s Made” of my favourite show. Sometimes, during these moments I feel like I should probably actually be watching Yitzhak since she’s the one driving the action at that point….

The show was staged completely different from any version of Hedwig I’d ever seen before with new lines, new alterations to the script and to the format. For the first time since the movie, I’m seeing a production that doesn’t either actually have Emily Hubbly’s drawings or someone imitating her style. The design of the animations is specifically more Japanese than the other versions, which of course makes sense being as the show is set in Japan.

The show was also basically a public dress rehearsal; something that annoyed some of the people on Twitter later (apparently), but I found completely wonderful. Again, this is a show that I know so well that I can follow international versions where I don’t speak the language just based off of intuiting a few words, of course I want to see a messier version of the show. A less polished version in terms of performance. My two favourite differences that weren’t in the script were 1.) where Hedwig is talking about masturbating Tommy in the bath and her wig completely popped off. She looked very surprised for a moment before picking up her wig and continuing perfectly. And 2.) the line change that Hedwig had in Wicked Little Town Reprise? She sang it so confidently for being the absolute wrong lyrics…. And of course, a million other little improv things stood out, like Hedwig calling Yitzhak her “oto” and then asking “what’s the other one again? [Yitzhak supplies word] Oh that’s right.” And the golden Hello Kitty patch on her ass (up towards her hip more than centered like the handprints were on Broadway.)

At the end of the show, I felt like I had probably smiled through 90% of the show it was performed so well. John, of course was amazing. And Ataru was completely incredible. I had anticipated loving her from the things that I had seen of her on YouTube and she blew away any expectations that I had had of her, she was so good.

Afterwards, as Miya and I walked out of the venue, she asked what I wanted to get for dinner/snack after the show. I said I didn’t care; wherever she wanted was fine because I had literally just had one of the best experiences of my life.

We opted to go back to the sushi restaurant, this time actually sitting at the bar/lunch counter. She ordered some a la carte sushi this time, I took more things off of the sushi conveyor belt. Since we had seen the show now, we were technically entitled to more free drinks. I opted to go for a not-free option of cold sake and Miya had…. I think iced tea? Maybe more matcha.

Honestly, cold sake tastes exactly like hot sake, but just a little bit smoother. While I liked the smoothness of it, I think the hotness of the hot sake helped it out a little bit more. I definitely would not drink sake on a regular basis, but it is interesting to me to see how that strong of a taste when blended into a sauce for Chinese food is completely minimized outside of an afterburn when you swallow. Miya had a sip or two of it too and I don’t think she was all that impressed with it either. I accidentally knocked over my glass at one point, getting the menu and the counter wet and sake-covered. I think the waiter thought I was drunk, but truly, I was just that clumsy.

While we ate, I searched for that one video I had remembered John posting about being worried about a lot of serious things and then his ass. I thought it would be a good idea to say “I don’t know about the other things, but your ass looked amazing from the second row!” I swear to you, I came up with that before I even thought about ordering the sake.

We paid and left both the restaurant and the Hikarie. I was feeling very optimistic. And a little sleepy.

The journey back went very smoothly and unlike the previous night, we did not stop at the 7/11 before going back to Miya’s.

Back at her apartment, I flipped through my own copy of the program by cell phone flashlight before falling asleep. Only a few Instagram posts by John of various backstage photos and rehearsal video keeping me awake.

[jaeminlore]

Let Me // Jeon Jungkook

-

the prompt: prince jungkook au where he always comes into the kitchen for late night snacks and y/n is new to the kitchen staff. soon they become friends and maybe something more. (definitely something more who am i trying to kid)(also request was rlly long so i summarized it)

words: 3820

category: fluff + once again, fond!kookie

author note: never apologize for long requests bc that is how i survive. also, someone seriously needs to stop me from writing about fond jungkook bc ya girl can’t get enough. anyway, please enjoy!

- destinee

-

“You’ll have the night shift,” the head chef of the castle, Mr. Kim, stated, “along with a few other staff members. Your job will be to wash dishes and make food. Then, as you get used to it, you’ll eventually spend all day here.”

“I have to make food in the middle of the night?” You asked.

Your eyes drifted around the kitchen. Shiny pots and pans hung from the ceiling, along with dried herbs and spices. The walls were made of stone bricks, and wooden tables surrounded the floor. Crates of rice were hidden under the tables, along with bowls of fresh fruit and vegetables. Your fingers were itching to make something with all of these ingredients.

“A chef’s work is never done.” He said, a slight twinkle in his eye.

You had to agree. Excitement was rushing over you as you realized your dreams were coming true. Surely you would be cooking for the royal family soon!

“So, shall I begin washing dishes?” You asked.

“No, wait until after dinner. For now, you can act as an assistant to me while I make the royal family a meal.”

“Sounds good!”

-

Jungkook could only stare at his plate at this time.

One of his favorite meals had been prepared for him, and yet he wasn’t sure he could even consume it.

His mother had been grilling him all week about a future queen, and the young prince detested the idea.

He was only nineteen. An age ripe for going on hunting trips and learning about other cultures. An age for visiting sister-countries and trying out their delicious food.

Except Jungkook was different. His father, the king, had been murdered two years prior. Which meant that it was up to Jungkook to become King as soon as he could, in order to preserve the lineage.

Which also meant it was time for him to find a wife. At least, that is what the queen liked to bring up every meal.

Jungkook was a fairly obedient son, yet marriage was something he felt he could be rebellious about. After all, he was going to spend the rest of his life with this person.

So when his mother said that she would start bringing eligible ladies into the castle, Jungkook couldn’t find it in himself to eat one bite.

-

Naturally, as Jungkook was a growing boy, he was still hungry by the time the day was over.

He was supposed to be asleep in his bed. He had a meeting with the ambassador tomorrow, and it wouldn’t look good if he was yawning throughout.

Still, the young prince found himself walking towards the kitchen, a place where he often found solace.

All of the kitchen workers loved him, and they were used to his many journeys to the kitchen in the middle of the night. Jungkook was a stress eater, and if it hadn’t been for his fast metabolism and active agenda, he would’ve become a rather chubby boy by now.

Everyone bowed when he entered the kitchen. He bowed back respectfully and smiled shyly, “Would you guys happen to have any spicy noodles?”

“Coming right up.”

Jungkook leaned against the counter and talked to everyone about their day. In return, they listened to his stress-filled complaining. It was a good system.

You came into the kitchen after a bathroom break, only to see the one and only crown prince leaning against the counter, chatting with the staff.

You bowed deeply, keeping your gaze to the ground, as was respected. “Your Highness.”

“It’s just Jungkook,” he said awkwardly. “Are you new here?”

“Yes, Your Highness,” You bowed again.

Jungkook scratched the back of his head awkwardly.

Then one of the cooks stuck an entire pan of spicy noodles in front of the prince.

“I’m making spicy chicken for you as well!” she cooed, reaching out to pinch Jungkook’s cheeks.

Jungkook smiled brightly and accepted the chopsticks from her.

You hesitantly moved away from the prince as he ate his food.

The cook who was making chicken for him, Mrs. Choi, gestured for you to come help her.

“Jungkook doesn’t like formalities,” she whispered. “He also comes here often in the middle of the night to eat and talk to us. It’s best to just let him say his piece.”

“Okay.” You took in her words as you mixed the ingredients for the chicken sauce.

“Mom keeps bringing up marriage,” Jungkook said. He slurped his noodles quietly as he mulled over his memories of dinner. “Can you believe she’s going to start bringing ladies in for me to court?”

Mrs. Choi tsked. “You’re growing up, Jungkook. It’s time to take responsibility and get yourself a wife.”

You furrowed your eyebrows as you poured the sauce over the chicken. “With no disrespect, Mrs. Choi, marriage is a really big decision. How can he choose out of people his mom picked for him?”

“Thank you,” Jungkook breathed. He walked up towards you and took a piece of chicken.

You backed up respectfully as Jungkook ate his food.

He continued, “I have told her time and time again that I am perfectly capable of becoming a good king without a queen. I’m too young, anyway.”

Picking up courage to address him, you spoke, “As long as you have wise advisors by your side, you won’t need a queen. Besides, it’s not like the current queen will drop of the face of the earth.”

“That’s what I’ve tried to tell her!” Jungkook but into a chicken leg angrily. He chewed thoughtful for a moment. “This is so good it almost makes me forget my problems.”

While he ate, you collected the empty dishes and brought them to the sink.

“Where are you going?” Jungkook asked.

You turned around, your arms filled with dishes. “I’m just going to clean the dishes.”

“Oh,” the prince picked up his plate of chicken and followed you.

This action was strange, as the sink was only across the room. You weren’t going into another room or kitchen or anything.

“So,” Jungkook leaned against the counter. “How do you think I can get my mom to let the subject go?”

Mrs. Choi pulled on her coat. “I’m going! Y/n, finish the dishes and you’re done. Also, don’t give him any ideas.”

You nodded as you scrubbed the dishes. “Yes, Ma'am.”

As soon as she left, you turned off the faucet and turned around. “Okay,” you gestured with your soapsud-covered hands. “So you have to prove to the queen that you can run a kingdom without a queen. Make wise decisions based on facts and not feelings.”

Jungkook smirked, “Ah, so after she trusts me, I’ll ask her if I really need a queen.”

“Right.” You smiled at him.

“Thanks so much…” his voices faltered. “What’s your name?”

“Y/n.”

Jungkook smiled. “Thanks Y/n, I feel a lot better now.”

-

Jungkook didn’t come back for the next two nights. You heard a lot of gossip from your fellow cooks, that Jungkook had been busy lately.

You secretly hoped it was him taking your advice and proving his strengths to his mother.

Unfortunately, his efforts were fruitless.

You were sitting around the kitchen, idly waiting as the dinner plates soaked. The kitchen was lonely, save for you, since Mrs. Choi had fallen sick and wouldn’t be back for a few days.

Jungkook slumped into the kitchen, surprising you. The frown on his face was enough to answer your unasked question.

“Mother didn’t appreciate my efforts,” he said sadly. “She told me I would never understand.”

You sighed. The last thing you wanted to do was disrespect the queen. Still, you felt bad for the prince. “That’s hardly fair. I wonder why Her Majesty is so adamant about you getting a wife.”

Jungkook pulled a chair beside you and fell into it. “I think she is worried that she won’t be around much longer. Ever since Father was murdered, Mother fears that she is next. I think the real reason is that she wants to know I’m being taken care of, even if she leaves this world.”

“Hmm…” You hummed. “That’s understandable. But the staff takes care of you. It’s not like we would leave you if she died.”

“I know that, I just wish she did,” Jungkook said. He looked around the empty kitchen. “Where is everyone?”

“Mrs. Choi is sick so she’s been home. Why? Do you want me to make you something?” You stood up.

Jungkook stood up. “I dunno. I kind of want cookies.”

You stood up. “How about double chocolate chunk? I’m really good at making those.”

“Can I help?” He grabbed the chocolate from the cupboard while you preheated the oven.

“If you want.” You shrugged and passed a cutting board and knife towards him. “You can cut half of this into chunks while I melt the other half.”

Jungkook grinned. “Mrs. Choi never lets me help her.”

“Why not?” You asked. You broke up the chocolate and placed it in a glass bowl. “Oh! Wait, Your Highness.”

Jungkook paused while you ran to get an apron for him. You let him pull it over his neck while you tied the lower strings around his waist. “We wouldn’t want to mess up your nice outfit.”

Jungkook snorted in an un-princely manner. “I don’t care about that.”

You moved to place the bowl of chocolate over a pan of boiling water. “Well, I live in the servants quarters, and I know for a fact that the laundry workers do.”

Jungkook nodded appreciatively, “I’ll wear the apron.”

Once the chocolate was melted, you began to mix cookie dough from scratch. You didn’t have a recipe, since you knew it by heart.

“Wow,” Jungkook said, watching you. “How many times have you done this?”

“I used to make these all the time when I was younger. It’s my own recipe.”

“Really?” Jungkook reached his hand into the bowl and took a small piece of dough.

“Don’t do that!” You slapped his hand away. “You’ll get sick.”

“Try and stop me,” Jungkook sassily replied as he grabbed the mixing spoon and began to eat the cookie dough off of it.

You sighed and let him continue to eat off of the spoon. Then you added the melted chocolate, along with the chocolate chunks Jungkook had cut for you.

Jungkook watched you mix it with a new spoon. “When will it be ready?”

“In fifteen minutes,” you answered. “We have to play the waiting game.”

Jungkook pouted and blew air out of his cheeks. “Fifteen minutes is a long time.”

“Patience is a virtue, my friend.” You said calmly.

Jungkook peeked up, although you were busy greasing the pan so you didn’t see his happy expression.

“Friends?”

You turned around, “Of course, if that’s okay.”

“That is more than okay.” Jungkook said. Then, trying to hide his smile, he said hastily, “Now let’s get these cookies in the oven!”

-

Mrs. Choi eventually came back, along with a few more staff members.

Since there were more than a dozen eligible ladies in the castle, the entire kitchen staff had a lot more dishes to clean. Not to mention more portions to make.

You and the rest of the kitchen were very busy, as well as the rest of the royal staff. The royal family had been in meetings with the many ladies all day.

The first day the ladies came, you and the rest of the kitchen staff had to work very hard to create each of the new guest’s favorite meals for dinner.

By the end of the day, you and the rest of the staff were tired. The smell of grease and seasoning was stuck to your clothes and hair.

You were washing dishes when Jungkook came in. He plopped into the chair, and sighed. “If I get asked my goals for marriage one more time I am going to lose it.”

You smiled, “Don’t worry, I’ve got cookies in the oven.”

Jungkook’ expression brightened.

Mrs. Choi came over. “A cookie for Kookie?”

“Kookie?” You looked at the prince. “Is that your nickname?”

The prince’s face flushed. “Maybe.”

“Can I call you by it?”

“No.”

You frowned, “Why not?”

The prince looked down at his shoes. You didn’t noticed the red blossoming on his cheeks. “I want you to call me Jungkook.”

You rolled your eyes. “Fine.”

The oven dinged.

“Yes!” Jungkook sprouted up. He walked over to the oven and pulled it open.

You tugged an oven mitt over your hand and took out the cookie sheet.

Jungkook, in his impatience, grabbed a cookie off of the pan. “Ow, ow, ow!”

You yanked the pan away and grabbed his wrist. “What did I say about patience, Jungkook?”

“It’s a virtue,” he recited like a scolded child.

All of the other cooks were on the other side of the kitchen, washing the dishes.

You grabbed a first aid kit out of the cupboard.

While you were sorting through the kit, Jungkook carefully picked up a cookie with his uninjured hand and ate it in one bite.

“You’re ridiculous,” you muttered.

You dabbed the ointment onto his fingers before bandaging them.

Jungkook watched before he picked up a second cookie. “Even so, thanks for taking care of me.”

“No problem.”

-

“Y/n!” Jungkook barged into the kitchen in the middle of the day.

All of the staff were used to you and the prince’s strange friendship. Jungkook was most confident around you and he was able to confide only in you.

To be frank, the kitchen staff had never seen Jungkook more stress-free than when he was with you. They liked seeing the happiness on the prince’s face when he talked to you.

Many times he talked to you about anything going on in his life. More than nought, he talked about nothing at all. Sometimes he just liked to stay in your presence and help you cook or clean.

All of the older staff could tell Jungkook was very fond of you. With your humble and kind attitude, it would be hard for the young prince not to fall for you. They believed you would be a good queen for him, should he ever come to terms with his emotions.

“What’s up?” You asked. You were eating a sandwich on your break.

Jungkook sat across from you and opened his mouth expectantly. You fed him a bite of your sandwich.

“I went on a date today.” He said between chews.

“How was it?” You took a sip of your water.

Jungkook swallowed his bite and took a sip of your water as well. The boy had no boundaries when it came to sharing food. You had learned to get used to it.

“She wanted to go to the bakery to try some food. I ordered some chocolate chunk cookies.”

“How were they?”

“They were dry.” Jungkook frowned. “I kept thinking of your cookies and how cool it would be if they were sold at the bakery. Could you imagine having your own bakery?”

You ducked your head. “I don’t know if I could ever pull it off. I need to be good at business and I don’t think I’ll ever be good at that.”

“I think you could do it,” Jungkook said, assured. Then he sighed, “So I told her about your cookies and she got mad at me.”

“Why? Because you didn’t like the bakery cookies?”

“No. She said I shouldn’t talk about other women on a date. She said it was rude.”

“What did you say?”

“I told her that I didn’t even want to be on a date with her so I should be able to talk about who I wanted.” He took another bite of your sandwich, “Besides, she wouldn’t give me a bite of cheesecake. I can’t build a marriage on a foundation like that!”

You snorted. “Jungkook, you’re never going to get a wife if you talk to her like that.”

Jungkook rolled his eyes, “That’s the point, Y/n. I’m trying to stay single as long as I can.”

“You know what you should do?” You pointed at him with sandwich in hand. “You should run away.”

Jungkook snapped his finger and pointed back at you, “You know, if you and I run away and start a bakery, we can stay single forever.”

“True.” You agreed. “We can make the best cookies this kingdom has ever seen.”

“I’m ready when you are,” Jungkook smiled.

-

Jungkook came in the next night, hoping to make some more cookies with You. “Y/n?”

Mrs. Choi peaked around the corner. “She’s got an off day, today. Sorry, bud.”

Jungkook pouted unconsciously. “Will she come back?”

Mrs. Choi smiled. “Aren’t you the sweetest.”

“What? Why?” Jungkook’s eyes widened.

Mrs. Choi’s eyes glistened mischievously. “This whole kitchen knows how you feel about her.”

“How do I feel about her?” The prince gulped nervously.

“You love her, Kookie. The two of you are practically joined at the hip. Even when you talked about running away, you still wanted to take her with you. Isn’t it love when you can’t imagine life without another person.”

Jungkook’s entire face was red. “I don’t really know how it happened.”

“She takes care of you, Jungkook. You found someone who listens to you and is willing to help you fix your problem.”

“I don’t want to tell her,” Jungkook said. “She won’t feel the same.”

“You don’t think?” Mrs. Choi quizzed. “You think she wouldn’t take this much time out for you if she didn’t like you?”

Jungkook bowed his head, “I think I’m afraid she only treats me like that because I’m the prince.”

-

You walked down the halls towards the kitchen.

On your day off, you had spent it reading and sleeping the day away. Your only regret was that you forgot to tell Jungkook you were on a break. He must’ve been confused when he entered the kitchen last night.

“Y/n?”

You turned around and saw Jungkook leaving what you assumed was his bedroom. He was half-dressed, in his pants and an undershirt. His dark hair was messy and you were slightly surprised to see his bare, flushed face.

“What are you doing out here?” His raspy voice questioned you.

“This is my route to the kitchen,” you answered. “Shouldn’t you be on your way to breakfast right now?”

Jungkook leaned against the doorway and smiled sleepily. “You caught me. To be honest, I couldn’t sleep.”

“Oh? Why not?” You stepped closer to the prince. “Are you sick?”

“I just have a lot on my mind,” he said.

“Well, try not to stress about it. If you want, I can make you some chocolate chip waffles.”

“Really?” He straightened up.

His tall figure seemed even more attractive to you this morning. The prince was always attractive, but here, in the rawness of the morning, he looked so natural. And natural was beautiful.

“Really.” You ushered him back into his room. “So go get ready and I’ll have your waffles ready for you when you come out.”

“Alright.”

He retreated into his room and you walked on, a smile on your face.

How many other people got to see the prince in such a beautiful state? You thought it might be a privilege.

You began the waffles as soon as you entered the kitchen.

After making enough for the entire royal family, you placed them all on the tray.

Then you carried it out into the dining room, where the queen and her son sat, along with a few remaining ladies.

“Have you chosen a wife yet, son?” The queen spoke.

You timidly walked towards the table and placed the tray of waffles in the middle of the table.

Jungkook caught your eye as he answered, “I’ve got someone in mind.”

If you were already nervous, being in the presence of the queen, Jungkook’s comment rattled you fatally. In shock, you lost your footing and fell towards the table. Only, when you used your hands to keep you from falling on the table, your right hand fell onto a small teacup, which ceremoniously broke, stabbing your flesh.

“Are you okay?” One of the ladies asked, reaching out for your hand.

You held you hand close to your stomach and bowed in respect. You were biting your lip to try and distract yourself from the pain. “I’m fine, My Lady. Please enjoy your breakfast.”

You hastily cleaned up the broken teacup and speed-walked back to the kitchen.

A few tears escaped your eyes as you extracted the painted glass from your palm.

“Y/n?” Jungkook entered the kitchen.

You looked down as he grabbed the first aid kit and extracted some ointment and gauze.

“Clumsy girl,” he tutted, kneeling in front of you. He grabbed your hand gently and examined it before applying the antibiotic ointment.

“It’s your fault,” you retorted.

Jungkook pretended not to hear. He really hadn’t meant to let that little comment slip during breakfast, but he couldn’t stop himself.

“I can wrap it myself,” you said. “You need to go finish dinner with your mother and those ladies.”

Jungkook scoffed. “I told them I had a stomachache and needed to go.”

“But—” Jungkook cut you off with a soft gaze.

“Hey,” he muttered, “You take care of me all of the time. Let me return the favor just this once.”

Your heart beat just a tiny bit faster after hearing those words. Not sure what to say, you simply replied, “Thanks.”

Jungkook wrapped the gauze around your hand and tied it securely. “Just so you know, I wasn’t lying.”

You bit your lip. “I know.”

“It’s just…you’re the only person I trust fully. I know that you’re fully capable of being a good wife and a good queen. But if you don’t want the responsibility, the runaway option is still available.” Jungkook gave you a nervous smile, as if he was worried you would reject him.

“Jungkook, you know you’re my best friend,” you said. Then, watching his smile falter, you shook your head. “I just mean that I can trust you with anything as well. You’re my favorite part of every day. Your voice is my favorite out of all the voices in the world and I want you to know that there is nothing on this earth I would rather do than be by your side for the rest of my life.”

With those words, Jungkook lifted himself to your level and kissed you. Gently, tentatively at first, until he grew more confident because you loved him as well.

“Besides,” you whispered against his lips, “Who says a queen can’t have her own bakery?”

“You are absolutely right,” Jungkook said. He grabbed your waist and pulled you closer to him. “I love you, Y/n.”

“I love you too, Jungkook.”

~the end~

[ganymedeandcallisto]

someone asked me for the 100 questions but tumblr is fuckin up so here u go my friend

1. What’s your middle name, and do you like it? a: lea (pronounced lee), it was my grandmas middle name and yes I do love it 
2. are you artistic? a: fuck yeah I am I sing and play instruments and do art 
3. Have you had your first kiss? a: yes 
4. What is your life goal? a: to be happy TBH 
5. Do you have any expieriences with a famous person? a: my dad went to grade school with this guy who won an Oscar! also Bernie sanders came to my high school for a rally which was so so cool 
6. Do you play any sports? a: what is a sport 
7. What’s your worst fear? a: that everyone I love is pretending to like me TBH 
8. Who’s your biggest inspiration? a: Kim from Matt and Kim ngl, also the people in Costa Rica who created the giant dog sanctuary 
9. Do you have any cool talents? a: I play 6 instruments and also I have a really good memory 
10. are you a morning person? a: YES I love getting up early especially when I don’t have to do anything 
11. How do you feel about pet names? a: hate (dyldoge) 
12. Do you like to read? a: YEAH I DO it’s so fun to me 
13. Name a list of shows that have changed your life. a: the office, game of thrones, the walking dead (mostly cause glenn and maggie) 
14. Do you care about your follower count? a: nope unless it’s 420 or 666 
15. What’s the best dream you’ve had? a: probably one where I was either flying or hugging someone 
16. Have you ever kissed someone of your same gender? a: I have not 
17. Do you have any pets? a: YEAH I HAVE TWO BEAUTIFUL BABIES (dogs) 
18. Are you religious? a: I am not 
19. Are you a people person? a: ahahahahaha noooooooooooooooo 
20. Are you considered popular? a: I’m not sure?? TBH 
21. What is one of your bad habits? a: saying yes when I want to say no, also procrastinating 
22. What’s something that makes you feel vulnerable? a: showing music I love to people 
23. What would you name your children? a: *dogs I love all dog names 
24. Who’s your celebrity crush? a: Marcos is the biggest celebrity of my heart 
25. What’s your best subject? a: English/history that uncovers how awful white america is/has been 
26. Dogs or cats? a: both!!!!!!!! but TBH dogs more 
27. most used social media besides tumblr? a: I’m not sure but I’m gonna say chat snaps 
28. best friends name a: Marcos and varla ofc <3 <3 <3 
29. who does your main family consist of a: my sister and my mom and dad and my two beautiful dog children 
30. Chocolate or sugar a: chocolate 
31. have you ever been on a date? a: yes! not formally like “would you like to go on a date with me?” tho 
32. Do you like rollercosters? a: I did……but Marcos and I went to the fair last summer and concluded that we are too old for this and our joints are too stiff 
33. Can you swim? a: yes and I love swimming so much 
34. What would you do in the event of an apocolypse? a: grab everyone I love and live in a Costco 
35. Have you struggled with any kind of mental disorder? a: yes ednos, depression, and trichotillomania 
36. Are your parents together? a: yes they are 
37. What’s your favourite colour? a: green forever and ever 
38. What country are you from/do you live in? a: USA :^) 
39. Favourite singer? a: I’m gonna say my favorite artist is Matt and Kim but there are so many other favorites ahahah 
40. Do you see yourself being famous some day? a: no TBH unless it’s for cooking 
41. Do you like dresses? a: yeah I fuckin love dresses but they are uncomfy sometimes 
42. Favourite song right now? a: poplar street by glass animals or vampire money by mcr honorable mention: planetary [go!] by mcr, well it’s true that we love one another by the white stripes, northeast by Matt and Kim, man on the moon by zella day, the way we move by langhorne slim and the law, when you’re young by Edward sharpe and the magnetic zeroes 
43. Does talking about sex make you uncomfortable? a: no I actually really like talking about sex! I think it’s healthy to 
44. How old were you when you first got your period? a: like 11 I think lmao 
45. Have you ever shot a gun? a: nope and I don’t really wanna 
46. Have you ever done yoga? a: yes 
47. Are you a horror girl? a: hell yeah give me some of that 😩💯😭👌🏽✔️✔️👅💦💦😳👀😍 babadook 
48. Are you good at giving advice? a: sometimes like I know exactly what I wanna say but I talk around it bc I’m bad at explaining things 
49. Tell us a story about your childhood. a: one time when I was 4 my cousin was bothering me and putting a pillow over my face so I bit him so hard it bled and now he’s a trump supporter but I can’t bite him bc I’m an Adult 
50. How are you doing today? a: I’m good!! I had a really great breakfast with my RA Rebecca and my roommate Sydney! 
51. Were you a cute kid? a: there was no kid cuter than me up until like 1st grade when I got glasses 
52. Can you dance? a: when no one is watching TBH 
53. Is there anything you do that you can’t remember ever not doing? a: eating with chopsticks and also wanting to be in love 
54. Have you ever dyed your hair? a: nooooo but I wanna 
55. What colour are your eyes? a: brown 
56. What’s your favourite animal? a: horses and dogs!! 
57. Have you ever made a huge fool of yourself? a: yes I definitely have :^)))) 
58. Do you have a good relationship with your parents? a: I think so!! they support my decision to change my major and I’m so so happy 
59. Do you have good friends? a: like 3 maybe who I never get to see ://// 
60. Are you close with anyone of the lgbtq+ group? a: ya bich it me (also yes!! many of my friends are) 
61. What’s your favourite class? a: this quarter, Asian American studies 
62. List all the tv shows you are watching. the walking dead, westworld, full frontal with Samantha Bee, daily show, game of thrones, I think that’s it? 
63. Are you organized? a: honey………no 
64. What was the last movie you saw? Opinion? in theaters I saw rogue one and I loved it so much THERE WERE POC LEADS 
67. Which tv character do you relate to most? a: I don’t know actually but probably Pam from the office TBH 
68. What are some things that stand between you and complete happiness? a: distance :/ and financial instability :/ 
69. If you received enough money to never need to work again, what would you spend your time doing? a: taking care of dogs 
70. What would you change about your life if you knew you would never die? a: id change the not dying part…….it’s gotta happen sometime just not now 
71. What would you do differently if you knew that no one was judging you? a: I’d dance all the time in public 
72. If you could start over, what would you do differently? a: stand up for myself 
73. Would you break the law to save a loved one? a: is this even a question of course I would 
74. When was the last time you travelled somewhere new? a: in August when me and Marcos went to SLO 
75. When you think of your home, what immediately comes to mind? a: the living room and my dogs greeting me and getting in n out for dinner 
76. What have you done to pursue your dreams lately? How about today? a: I found out I can change my major really quickly 
77. What did you want to be when you were a kid? a: a paleontologist I loved dinosaurs 
78. If you dropped everything to pursue your dreams, what would you be risking? a: not too much actually I dream of being financially stable with my love Marcos and being surrounded by dogs and having my family live not super close but not too far away 
79.When did you not speak up, when you know you really should have? a: in class bc participation is part of the grade 
80. Describe the next five years of your life, and your plans, in a single sentence a: I’m going to finish college with a steady job, hopefully travel a lot, and spend all the time I can working towards The Dream™ 
81. What would happen if you never wasted another minute of your life, what would that look like? a: me: graduates college and gets a masters degree within a year 
82. If you could live forever, how would you spend eternity? a: looking for a way to make Marcos also live forever and then taking care of all dogs 
83. How would you spend a billion dollars? a: I’d buy a big house that has a lot of land for my dogs to run around in and pay for a bunch of kids’ tuition and buy my parents a bunch of vacations and create spaces for dogs everywhere and donate to Bernie Sanders and Elizabeth Warren……that’s kind of a big question 
84. If you could time travel, would you go to the past or the future? a: the past so that I can see all the history white people cover up 
85. What motivates you to succeed? a: The Dream ™ of being financially stable in a nice apartment with a few dogs and the love of my life Marcos 
86. What dream that you’ve had has resonated with you the most? a: I had a nightmare that trump became president 
87. Would you rather live in the city or the woods? Why? a: woods bc city smell like pee and is smoggy 
88. Do you believe in life after death a: kinda but I hope it’s a life where I don’t really have to Do anything 
89. What teacher inspired you the most? How did they? a: my great uncle because he was a professor of English and he loved my great aunt so much and had a house in the middle of nowhere surrounded by forest and deer and it had a greenhouse and a place for bats to roost 
90. What’s your fondest childhood memory? a: making pillow forts with my sister and then destroying them by jumping on top of them 
91. If you could have dinner with any one person, living or dead, who would they be and why? a: I wanna have dinner with Donald trump, specifically so I can stab him in his orange face with my fork 
92. What would you have to see to cry tears of joy? a: not too many things TBH I cry very hard at practically everything 
93. What is the hardest lesson you had to learn in life? a: you shouldn’t have to change something about yourself in order to deserve love (unless ur a neo nazi or a mass murderer or something like that obviously) 
94. What do you think happens after we die? a: party in the afterlife 
95. What would you do if you would be invisible? a: probably steal money from trump but make it look like mike pence or richard spencer did it 
96. What’s something you can’t do no matter how hard you try? a: whistle ahahaha 
97. Would you want to choose the sex and appearance of your offspring? a: all dogs are beautiful 
98. How did your first crush develop? a: my first crush was on Luke Skywalker and it developed by me watching a new hope 
99. Is there a feeling you are trying to ignore? What is it? a: it’s the feeling of That Fuck Shit and i ignore it on the daily 
100. Do you live or do you just exist? a: time is meaningless and none of us Actually exist

[infernalkrp]

HERE YOU LEARN KNOWLEDGE BEGINS WITH FEAR.

STUDENT FILE. TAKAHASHI, Keiko.

PERSONAL. Takahashi Keiko, born on 18/10/2000 ( age 17 ) in Nagoya, Japan. Currently receiving no scholarship.

ACADEMIC. Second year. Registered in the Art Department, coursing history of fine arts and history of cinema. Currently ranking in Gamma Tier, assigned to dorm room GF-01.

SOCIAL. Participates in the Gardening Club, as member, and the Swimming Team, as member. Associated with the PSIC, as member.

RESTRICTED ACCESS.

HISTORY.

keiko is born as the second child to associate economics professor takahashi takeshi (a second-generation zainichi with chongryon upbringing) and advertising director shirota yumiko (a second-generation zainichi with mindan upbringing) in nagoya, though the family moves out to tokyo a year later when takeshi is appointed tenured professorship at waseda university.

her parents are well-regarded figures in their respective fields and work diligently to provide a stable foundation for their two children. keiko grows up without much of the hardships her own parents had faced as youth.

her brother, eight years her senior, sets an example for his little sister to follow. he attends amji institute after expressing his desires to learn korean proper (and not at weekend school or preparing gimjang with grandma) and study in the west for university.

the good-natured keiko is also easily distracted, with constantly flip-flopping interests. they think amji might instill the work ethic and resolve she lacks—and what older brother keisuke emerged from high school chock full of.

keiko undergoes intense private tutoring a year before application season. she barely tests in.

attending amji proves to be a double-edged sword. within her first year keiko quickly hones in on an area of study that she excels at and sees herself possibly pursuing after graduating, but it amounts to little as she struggles terribly with the rest of the school’s curriculum.

her failures don’t faze her; she manages to scrape by with her less-than-stellar performance, choosing to focus the bulk of her energy on things that matter instead: history, nail art, her budding herb garden, neo-noir night, and ghosts.

LIMITATIONS.

dad’s korean is getting worse as he gets older. you’re acutely aware of the hot embarrassment that tinges your ears red when he struggles to communicate with the waitress as he squints with great difficulty at the menu on the wall. what’s that one, second from the bottom? sorry, what was that? can you repeat one more time, please? and then, giving up, we’ll take one, before he turns back to you with a slow smile.

dad. you say, and your voice rises even though you don’t mean to get impatient with him. he’s just trying his best. he probably feels embarrassed, too, looking at the way his upper lip crooks and he reaches a hand behind his head, patting where the hair is thinnest. he switches back.

iyaaa, i’m sure it’ll be tasty. i’ve never had this regional cuisine before.

neither have you. everything about this is new. even having dad sit here in front of you like this is new. mom left a week ago on business but dad said he’d stay with you until you kicked him out. he’s actually leaving tomorrow. you think maybe he’d said it out of guilt for pushing you into this situation in the first place but mostly you think he said it because he loves you.

you love dad, too, even if you don’t have the courage or sense to tell him that right then and there. you pick up your metal chopsticks and nibble on an over-seasoned piece of fried fish cake, savoring this moment for all that it’s worth. when the mystery soup comes out of the kitchen, dad stands up to ladle it into your bowl. plop plop. he tells you to eat up before it gets cold. his voice sounds far away.

you take a bite. it’s comforting. the potato balls are soft and bounce happily on your tongue. the broth is gentle, and warms you down to your core. it’s simple food but emotion hits you like a wave and there are tears welling in your eyes when you look back up. dad.

by this time tomorrow, he’ll be on a plane back to tokyo and you’ll be on your own. you won’t see your family until summer. it will be like this—rare holidays and fleeting reunions—until the day comes when you assume your parents’ place and they are children again. the knowledge was always distantly there but it takes a bowl of hot soup for it to register. you look at dad’s bald spot and the first tear trails down your cheek. dad, i don’t want you to leave. when he sees you crying, he panics like you expect him to and grabs as many napkins as he can from the table dispenser to catch your tears.

keicchan, don’t cry. tochan’s right here. i’ll cancel the flight if you want me to. i’ll stay as long as you want.

you can hear a lump lodged in his throat, too. but you shake your head and shove another spoonful of soup into your mouth. you have to go and i have to stay. you chant the words over and over between chews as dad reaches across the table to hold your other hand. these are necessary growing pains. you have to go and i have to stay.

ASPIRATIONS.

it’s field day and the relay has taken everything out of you, maybe even a chunk of your soul. you lay on the grass snow angel style in the dead of summer. the grass underneath is poking past the fabric of your shorts and prickles at your skin and even though it’s uncomfortable you are simply too exhausted to budge.

your eyes are closed but you hear her approaching you, feet padding softly on the ground until they’re next to your left pigtail. she crouches down and tells you to open your mouth so you do. then she pours water into your mouth. the water is cold and clean. it feels like that missing chunk of your soul has just slipped back into you—or that a part of her has entered you. “thanks,” you manage feebly, and cross an arm over your eyes to block out the sun but more importantly to cover your face. you think maybe the redness from having overexerted yourself will obliterate any chance of her finding out that she’s the one actually setting you on fire.

when you no longer hear her within earshot, you sit up and open your eyes. she’s left a water bottle next to where your right pigtail had been. you chug it down as quickly as you can to extinguish the flames in your face and the water rises in your belly, sloshing heavy.

BEHAVIOR.

 [ kkt ⇀ 구XX ] thinking of just getting my hair done during chuseok [ kkt ⇀ 구XX ] but that reminds me [ kkt ⇀ 구XX ] [x] [ kkt ⇀ 왕XX ] ??? [ kkt ⇀ 왕XX ] did you do these yourself or [ kkt ⇀ 구XX ] hahaha no i wish [ kkt ⇀ 구XX ] i just got them done by a friend i can rec you if you want in ;) [ kkt ⇀ 왕XX ] who omg [ kkt ⇀ 구XX ] uhh you might not know her [ kkt ⇀ 구XX ] takahashi keiko [ kkt ⇀ 왕XX ] whattt no we were in the same philosophy section last year i remember her she was cute. and kinda weird lol [ kkt ⇀ 왕XX ] don’t have her kakao or anything tho so yeah put in a good word for me [ kkt ⇀ 왕XX ] does she take appointments or smth? and how $$? [ kkt ⇀ 구XX ] i’m not sure actually she runs a mysterious operation and practically gives manicures away for free like i only paid ten thousand [ kkt ⇀ 왕XX ] not surprised lol she like never talked during our section meetings and was always sick or asleep [ kkt ⇀ 구XX ] she must have skipped hahaha she never gets sick [ kkt ⇀ 왕XX ] also recall her like.. filling up entire notebooks with flip art. and her handwriting is mad good so figures [ kkt ⇀ 구XX ] yeah IT IS omg so nice [ kkt ⇀ 구XX ] she’s sweet though!! i don’t see her a lot bc she’s always out with her club friends doing god knows what but she’s super sweet [ kkt ⇀ 왕XX ] how do you know her then [ kkt ⇀ 구XX ] we’re neighbors [ kkt ⇀ 구XX ] i’m a gamma bitch remember [ kkt ⇀ 왕XX ] oh that’s right. dumb bitch [ kkt ⇀ 구XX ] you wanna stay a dusty hands bitch? [ kkt ⇀ 왕XX ] love youuu

[omgcharleschen-blog]

GEOG 100 FIC:  Term PROJECT (201801)

FIC ID: CHEYD1502

Name: Charles Chen

Introduction:

Hi! My name is Yuaola Chen. I am a student of Fraser International College. I will share my personal geography story. This project will meanly describe the diversity of different cultures and places. Every culture is powerful and it gives a place an identity. It is an enjoyment to enjoy all of them and feel it. Within a particular place, a culture can play a role in everything; For example, cultural traits, agriculture, infrastructure, and traditional ceremonies. Canada is a place that is a fairly recent country with not that much of a history. Its diversity is due to immigration coming from all around the world. People made different places in Canada, for example, Vancouver Chinatown, to express their own feelings about their culture. Due to the existence of different types of cultures in Canada, especially in BC and AB, natural landscapes are becoming independent cultures. People who live in BC or AB or even on the whole west coast has their culture that they think natural is more important than economic development. Actuarially, I think cultures are related to many themes. Cultures affect economic in two ways. The positive way is that combine different cultures and different local economies will get the distinctive economy for that countries or cities. That will make big increase to the local economies. But everything comes with negative effects, the negative of culture shapes economic is that in some certain types of cultures that people will be confined by different feudal superstitions. They believe their unique beliefs, so that may obstruct local economic development. For example, there are many people disagree with the project of the gas pipeline because they think it will damage the natural in the future as the precondition of leakage of the pipeline will happen. Due to that, the gas price increased 19%, which is crazy because it making Vancouver become the most expensive gas price in North America. It is harder for people who have cars to live in Vancouver because the cost of living increase every year and that is economic development failure. Cultures are also staying together with politics. If the government want to publish new policies, they will need to consider all people that have a different cultural identity within the country. Cultures are the really powerful theme because it can relate to everything and people cannot live without cultures.

My Geography (Cities I lived):

I will talk about my personal geography in three big parts. Each part has its unique cultural trails and cultural system. Those parts are my life experiences and also my memory. Obviously, the first part is China, because it took nearly 3/4 time of my life. The second part is Canada, focus on the great Vancouver area, because it becomes like my second “hometown” where I came to university unit now. The third part is America, it is the place that I usually travel to. Some points of culture trails between America and Canada are similar, but there are also some points are conflicting.

China:

I was born in Hohhot in the Inner Mongolia that is the north part of China, the city takes about 17,224 square kilometers. The population of Hohhot is 5 million people. The main language is Mandarin, but some of the people they speak local slang or Mongolian. Some of my friends in Vancouver were born in the south part of China. Even though we are all Chinese, which means our ancestors were all been through same 5,000 Chinese culture. However, China is a big country and the north of China mostly face the mountain, the southern parts of China face the sea. According to nearness principle, people who are in the north Chinese culture like me mainly eat noodles or any wheat made the product as staple food, but my friends who were born in southern parts of China mainly eat rice or other rice made product as their staple food. This is the conflict of eating cultures between me and my friends. For the language, we all speak common mandarin, but sometimes my friends would like to speak their local slang with their parents. There is a special milk tea that people can only eat at here. This milk tea tastes salt and delicious. My mom always made those milk teas when I was still in Hohhot. My mom told me that I should learn how to make it properly because we only make salt milk teas when the family party or there are guests come to visit in our culture. So I have learned before I go to Canada.

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I spent two years living in Beijing before I went abroad to Canada. Beijing is the capital of China. It located also in the north of China, takes about 16.41 million square kilometers. The population of Beijing is not stable because there are lots of people that they came to Beijing to work and when the Chinese New Year comes, they will go back to their own hometown. That gives Beijing a new name called “Chinese immigrant city”. So, the population of Beijing usually around 21.17 million. They speak Mandarin in different tones, so we give a name to that unique mandarin called Beijingnese. People use chopsticks to eat. And the eating culture is similar to Hohhot. We both love noodles and meats. When I was lived in Beijing, I was lived in my aunt’s home. My aunt always makes me Zhajiang Noodle that is the unique noodle that only can be eaten in Beijing. My aunt used her prepared fired sauce that is mixed with meat and soy sauce and hand-made noodles and also some fresh vegetables. When I mixed those things together, I feel like paradise. I decided to learn how to make this delicious noodle so that when I miss China, I can make up myself with that delicious noodles. People who lived in Beijing are very polite and kind. There is the old saying in Beijing called “Far relatives are inferior to neighbors”. So, neighbors are always like families to each other. I also learn that manner.

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Canada:

I came to Canada to study two years ago. Before I went to Canada, I heard lots of rumors that said there are some white people who decimalized other people and people are not as nice as they act like in the films. I was worried about how to get along with people in here. But, when I arrived in Vancouver on the first day, it changed my mind. People are so nice here, especially those people who work in the Vancouver International Airport. Thanks for the globalization, some of them can even speak mandarin. It made me feel like I was still in China. The great Vancouver located in the west coast of Britch Colombia, it is one of the important gateway cities and also the financial center of Canada. The main languages are English and French, but most of people only speak French in Quebec Province. Vancouver takes about 1.15 million square kilometers and the population of here are just about 63.2 million which is widespread of people. It is the third largest city of Canada and it also has a wonderful nickname called “The northern Hollywood”, because lots of America films and drama are shot here every year and many famous directors and celebrities come from here. People who live in Vancouver love life. If you look closely, you can see that people who live in Vancouver have different dress styles. Many people are chosen clothes by comfort and they do not care about others’ opinions of how they dress. However, there are more people, especially in Downtown area, are chosen clothes by fashion. This is conflicts of the dressing culture in Vancouver.

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During the first university life in Vancouver, I lived in the homestay family. It is a standard Canadian white family. They are really nice to me and always think about me just like my own parents. Everyday they make different health diet dishes to me, during the dinner time they always talked about their life story and sometimes they will have talked about how they want to change the environment and also their health diet life style. Their health life style not only include how they eat healthy but also include how they can build their body more scientifically. For example, they always buy organic vegetables and meats and cook for me with those fresh ingredients. Sometimes its bothers me, because at my point of view that there is no difference between regular food and organic food. People will not die if they do not eat organic food. With these questions, I asked my homestay parents. They said to me that although organic food is more expensive than regular food, they are good for our body in the longer period of time. They also said that they would like to spend more money on the everyday meal, so that they can live longer. They also advocate me that daily exercise is necessary. They went to the Deer Lake Park twice a day and they also work out in every afternoon time. I was so impacted by them, because they already reached 70 years old. However, their daily health life style made them look like 40 or 50 years old. In my country, people of my age are always play video games and eat junk food. They never care about their body that make me feel bad, because they are waste their body. As the time goes by, I had learned how to take care of my body just like what my homestay parents did. During the first year of university, they influenced me a lot in the positive ways. They love Chinese cultures, especially our language and our traditional Chinese dishes, so I decided to do something for them in return. I tough them how to make traditional salt milk teas, they said they never make milk teas like this way and they only drank bubble tea before. I also tough them how to make my favorite Beijing-Zhajiang noodles and they thanked me to bring such delicious noodles to them. I feel happy about it, because I spread my culture to more than 10,000 kilometers away and I have impacted world for sure.

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America:

        During my university life in last two years, I went to the America a lot. Sometimes I went to border to get gas, because gas price was too high in Vancouver. However, during the vacation time, such as summer vacation, winter vacation or spring vacation, I have travel a lot of places in the America.

        Starting from the west coast. When I first got my driver licenses, I started my travel time. The first place is the Seattle, that is a very beautiful place has a similar size to Vancouver, but it is more like a microcosm of New York City. Its architectural style is the same as New York. In particular, the periphery of each building has a unique relief, which are impressive. The population of the Seattle is also similar to Vancouver. They are like brothers with same cultural traits and systems, because they are all the west coast cities. So, their cultural identify in the west coast cultural system. And thanks for globalization, I was not worried about that I could not find delicious foods that satisfy me, because most restaurants are chained in the west coast. I think that is also part of cultural system.

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 I often see on the YouTube that some bloggers drove along the western coastline all the way to Los Angeles. With the experiences in the Seattle, I planned to drive more distance with my friends at last summer vacation. It took us 17 days to travel through all the West Coast cities, such as San Francisco, Los Angeles, and San Diego. We even drove to Las Vegas. Being able to drive to Los Angeles was my dream when I was in the high school, because GTA that the developer was based on the Los Angles cities made the game was popular around the global. When we arrived in LA, I feel like that I was been here before. Everything was just like in the game, I was so excited. Each build also has the different reliefs. I think it is also the cultural traits that only play roles in America culture. Los Angles located in the southwest of the California state, it is the second biggest cities in the America. It took about 12.91 million square kilometers. The population of 3.976 million.  Most of people speak English only. People also call it City of Angles. Los Angeles is one of the major centers for industry and commerce, international trade, science, education, entertainment and sports in the United States. It is also one of the major bases for the US petrochemical, marine, film, aerospace and electronics industries. Because of globalization, it has Korea town, Japan town, China town. This multicultural combination is unique in the global level. People live in here participate the same behavior just like Vancouver’s people or all other west coastline cities. Together they form a unique West Coastline culture. I also was influenced by west culture a lot.

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I also wen to the east coast during the last winter vacation. New York and the Orlando are the representor of east coastline. I went to both place during the winter vacation. One thing made me feel so strange. During all my travel time in America, I can always find Chinese restaurants in the local area. But the representors which is Orlando and Miami of the east coast did not have many Chinese or Korean restaurants. That is the only thing that shocked me. I can feel the different between west coast culture and east coast culture. In the east coast, people’s life style is fast paced and everybody know exactly what they want to do in the future. People’s ambition is stronger than the west coast people. In the west coast, people are chill and their life style are slow and relax. The east coast culture impact me in the positive way, it made me think about more. It made me realized that young people who living on the west coast for a long time in a relaxed lifestyle will lose their ambition.

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https://www.google.ca/imgres?imgurl=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.jetblue.com%2Fimg%2Fvacations%2Fdestination%2FNewYorkSkyline_960x420.jpg&imgrefurl=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.jetblue.com%2Fvacations%2Fnew-york-city-vacations%2F&docid=MOXnniUmbjydYM&tbnid=mcya6UVuwFmHEM%3A&vet=10ahUKEwjqnKK10praAhVnwFQKHdcTB4IQMwiMAShMMEw..i&w=960&h=420&bih=925&biw=1920&q=new%20york%20city&ved=0ahUKEwjqnKK10praAhVnwFQKHdcTB4IQMwiMAShMMEw&iact=mrc&uact=8

How have I impacted the world?

As I mentioned, I impacted my homestay parents. I touch them how to make salt milk tea which I can only drunk in my hometown. I also touch them how to make traditional Chinese dishes. I even touch them how to speak my language. After I came back to my hometown, I impact my own families and friends. I touch my parents and my friends what the west coast cultures are and I also touch them how to live healthily, such as, eating organic food and keep working out. I think I am an qualified cultural spreader.

How the world impacted me?

My homestay parents impacted me in the positive ways. They touch me how to live healthily. During my travel time, I was impacted so much by west coast culture and east coast culture. Some people think they are against each other, but I think I can extract the good points from both cultures, so that I can become a multicultural person who can work efficiently and also know how wo live a health life.

http://www.mapsofworld.com/world-map-image.html