#(or in other words 'ITERATE faster' gotta be willing to wallow in the muck to find the gems)

[an-organized-confusion]

Okay. So I just watched an interesting podcast/interview between two writers. One of which was involved in the utter trainwreck of bad ethical decisions that was “The Heads of Sierra Blanca“. It was supposed to be a fictionalized investigative murder mystery sort of podcast... but marketed itself with the pretense of being “true crime“.

Frankly, it was entertaining and illuminating.

That just made me think of how a the mere idea of a single, foundational creative choice can make a project fail spectacularly would affect any of the Sides needing to comment on that sorta thing happening (in the abstract)...

I think that's one of Roman's deepest fears. Get so invested in a project and blind to the problems until the chickens have already come to roost. This might hang him up from starting new projects often (fear of failure can lead to indefinite procrastination). It hurts to fail, especially if it became a true lynchpin sort of scenario... but I think he recognizes the virtue of dusting yourself off after them and keeping on trying to make stuff. He has had to do that countless times, and will need to do that countless more. (Can fuel determination to remind oneself how many times we’ve gotten back up after a tough time. And that our entire body of work isn’t defined by just the mistakes.)

Remus probably already doesn't expect his ideas are winners - he'll just move on to the next thing. Not really taking it’s failure all that personally. (Which can be a strength in of itself, sometimes you gotta be willing to kill your creative “babies/darlings”, let it go, and move on to something else. In a weird sense, I can see him actually provide Roman moral support - there’s more shit worth exploring. More fish in the imagination ocean.)

Virgil would probably amplify Roman's feelings of insecurity about failures - using that imagery/theme to reinforce his generally pessimistic outlook. BUT. realistically/maturely there is a point where you gotta let yourself fuck up so you learn the valuable shit. It can motivate one to avoid repeating that mistake and care more about what you actually are putting out. (Just gotta find that Goldilocks Zone of anxiety/excitement.)

Logan may feel at least SOMEWHAT culpable if he was ever involved in such a project - hoping he would have enough objectivity to realize this boat was going to sink if not intervened on sooner. And generally, I could see him preventing a few of these... definitely would take cues from Virgil’s assessments to plan for future projects better, ensure that they are structurally sound.

Janus... hmmm. I can see him being that instinct to dig in the heels and attempt to deflect the clear failings at show. That instinct to protect self from negative feedback by kinda putting the head in the sand or even dishing it out on critics. (Also recognizing that yeah “we done fucked up big time and have learned better ways of handling things in future.” Especially in terms of how to handle potential reactions to the project. When to defend oneself and when to eat the humble pie.)

Patton might be the hopeless optimist - wanting to keep up the morale as shit is falling apart. in some ways, the other side of the denial coin with Janus. (However he does have a point to make on recognizing there CAN be good that comes from failure. There can be stuff worth digging outta the trainwreck to take away. It’s important to at least try to nurture hope in self and in the future.)