#(ooc: the translations in readmore is really good i should do that)

[incorrigibleimpasto]

°h fuck +he rum°rs are +rue ! d° have p!ss p°°r read!ng c°mphrehens!°n

g°°d f°r y'all +h° ha+e w!ns °r wha+ever

(plain text under cut)

translation:

oh fuck the rumors are true I do have piss poor reading comprehension

good for y'all tho hate wins or whatever

Hey, II pulled a biitch. You losers need to learn how to get more comfortable wiith the iidea of dyiing and possessiing your kiismeses' eyes.

OOC THE HTML IS WORKING AGAIN!!

YE^H TBH WH^TEVER YOU TWO H^VE GOING ON IS WEIRD ^S FUCK. ENTERT^INING FOR ME THOUGH

[freevoidman]

Okay I’m reading through Porg’s update so some of y’all can save your braincells and here are some great highlights (under a readmore bc i couldn’t help but tear into a few things she suggested):

Flat out ignoring that Vergil had changed by the end of the game as a result of V and Urizen’s separate experiences.

In trying to make V and Urizen their own character, she throws out the idea of Vergil being manipulated by the Qliphoth/Urizen (??? somehow??? even though the tree is implied to be non-sentient i believe???), with V being a Devil hunter looking through the remains of Mallet Island (which was completely blown up, turned to rubble, and then swallowed by the sea, so... that can’t happen), finding the cane which makes him youthful and not sick but... having the cane makes it so he can only kill demons through the cane??? for some reason??? And he needs the Qliphoth fruit to heal himself and free him from the curse???

How did she make V’s backstory even more confusing and complicated how the fuck did she do that

Almost immediately after bringing up the cane, she instead changes it to be one of the rings he’s wearing because she wants her “precious V” to use weapons other than the cane, which makes all the prior paragraphs about the cane’s curse and only using it pointless. She’s the one writing this fic, why can’t she edit her own work so it’s more cohesive?

Despite saying that V should be a Devil Hunter, she doesn’t explain why someone who is supposed to be killing demons would form a pact with at least three to fight demons. Her rewrite dismisses Visions of V, and she even states later that the manga is a waste of time as it won’t ever be translated into English (which 1) is not a limiting factor to reading it as many people have translated it already and 2) doesn’t dismiss it’s value at building up V’s character, who she supposedly likes the best).

Also, for someone who complains about DMC5 being a rehash of DMC3, she’s sure doing her best to change it to a rehash of DMC1 (Vergil being controlled by an outside force, bringing back Mallet Island, bringing back Mundus [the cane is supposed to be tied to Mundus]).

V apparently can’t be human because she wants to give him a devil trigger, despite having 3 familiars and his own strength. Okay I guess?

Also it’s really fucking sick how she describes V changing, because it’s apparently V fusing with Nightmare? Devil May Cry has never been one for body horror but she straight up says she was inspired by “The Thing (1982), The Fly (1986), Bloodborne, and Resident Evil 7″ for the transformation imagery and I wanted to nope the fuck out of there real quick.

Her segments of actual fiction writing and dialogue are really bad it’s almost like a parody Youtube skit.

She switches between prose and script writing randomly, it’s really odd. She does it primarily with Dante i’ve noticed? Here’s an example I wrote of what she does:

“Hey, don’t stress out about it will you?” Says John following a few steps behind VINCENT: Don’t get your panties in a twist

And that just happens... randomly? Like, there’s no indication why she’s doing that it just happens.

She straight up writes notes in her fic about the controls for character actions in-game what the hell--

She also shamelessly puts in a link to artwork that clearly isn’t her’s (and I highly doubt she got permission to post about) to try and show what V’s Devil Trigger would look like. I couldn’t find it because I don’t know how pixiv works, but that’s just a shitty move, especially with how she treats artists on tumblr when they draw art of Vergil.

EDIT: Porg has now straight up copy-pasted the art into her fic without the artist’s permission which is, we all know, fucking theft. While it is good artistry, is just a weird mashup of Vergil’s and Dante’s. It’s not all that unique and I don’t understand why she had to reference a bunch of body horror shit when all the Devil Triggers in game are essentially just a large flash of light and a seamless transition between forms??? It’s good art, I’m not trying to bash the artist, but... Porg, you could’ve been a little more original here rather than just ripping off another artist’s designs...

Everyone in her fic acts super casually to seeing Vergil alive in the Qliphoth and it’s like... honey, no.

Vergil acts WILDLY out of character holy fuck. Like, I know I should have expected that but this is NOT how Vergil would act in the slightest. She’s pretty much writing an OC.

Building off of this: EVERYONE acts OOC and... it’s not exactly cringey, but it is perfect proof that Porg doesn’t know what she’s doing and hasn’t properly analyzed the characters.

Dante acts weirdly... detached? There’s no sign of him acting like his normal goofball-y self, and he’s much more serious than normal. He actually acts more like cannon Vergil than himself, actually. (He also knows CPR apparently? Which... is a skill he would really never bother learning, so...)

Nero doesn’t act nearly as emotional, and acts calmly for some reason. You can’t feel any of his emotions behind his dialogue, only through the adverbs added to the tags)

V is too informative. He knows way too much about random shit that... no one should rightfully know. I’ll mention it more later, but... V doesn’t act like himself and I don’t really know how to explain it.

Vergil is essentially her OC. Seriously--he’s not as brooding or snarky, he’s far too open and apologetic, there’s practically no sense of rivalry between him and Dante. Weirdly, he acts more like canon V than fic!V does, despite the fact that Porg wants to establish V and Vergil and separate characters. His actions also make no sense when put alongside his canon personality. We aren’t reading anything about Vergil, we’re reading about Porg’s weirdly idealized version of him.

I’m going to make a break in the post here because I feel like this is the part that needs the most attention:

Porg goes OUT OF HER WAY to dedicate a GIANT portion of this chapter to her own OC: Nero’s mom. There are several long paragraphs of establishing the relationship between her OC and Vergil, talking about leaving Fortuna, how they were ‘happy’ and then saying that after a hurricane (inspired by hurricane hugo, you’ll see later) she got separated from Vergil, never reconnected with him, GAVE BIRTH, died from a demon attack with Nero staying near her corpse, and then Nero was found by humans and taken off the mainland to be taken to an orphanage on Fortuna. She wanted a massive amount of time to be taken out of the fun parts of playing Devil May Cry to establish a relationship that would never come back and essentially turn into a 15 minute soap opera inserted into a game about having fun killing demons.

Alright back to the noted highlights.

Porg confirms in her fic that the universe of Devil May Cry happens in the US, and that Fortuna is an island along the southeast coast and I want to fucking rip my eyeballs out at this point.

The ONLY REASON why she is doing this is because she lives in Florida. I know she does, and she just wants to imply that this is all happening near her home turf. How anyone who lives in Florida thinks an island like Fortuna can exist is beyond me though, because playing through 4, most of the buildings are inspired by Italian designs, and no one in the states would build an entire island with italian designs. I’ve been to Florida multiple times--there’s no buildings there even REMOTELY designed to match Fortuna.

EDIT: I have been informed that Porg actually lives in Pennsylvania, not Florida, which makes both more and less sense. Why Florida? Why not a hidden island up on the east coast? Why does this have to be taking place in the states at all Porg???

Yeah, let’s take Nero off the MAINLAND OF FLORIDA after a DEVASTATING HURRICANE and send him to an orphanage on an ISLAND which would’ve been hit the hardest by ANY hurricane. TOTAL SENSE. 

She tries to make her own timeline for the series using actual real world dates and events and it’s terrible (she references Hurricane Hugo in 1989, and confidently states that 3 took place in 1990, despite all evidence for the actual dates of events being fan theory established through circumstantial evidence).

There’s so much horror movie inspiration here--not cheap horror, but really twisted shit that... doesn’t fit with Devil May Cry’s tone at all? In the slightest? She references Jacob’s Ladder, plus all the other body horror media I wrote above.

Straight up just tears Vergil’s arm off which sure, I guess we gotta make THAT a parallel between Nero and Vergil. They can have a father son moment over being physically maimed.

In the scene immediately before this, Urizen picks up Vergil by the head and roots around Vergil’s memories (somehow???) to show him all the ‘bad moments’ in his life to traumatize him. She describes it as the audience getting flashes of him falling to hell, charging Mundus, being Nelo Angelo, etc. 

This causes Vergil to cry and beg for Urizen to stop. Then Urizen rips off his arm. So. Yeah. Another point for the OOC!Vergil/OC-taking-Vergil’s-place board.

Also this point ALONE made me realize that Porg does not know how much time, effort, and money needs to be put into making assets. Like, the entire fic she was stressing that everything be done in 5′s HD Graphics--including the ruins of Mallet Island, so I have to assume she’d want these little snippets in HD too, which would be a massive money hole creating these assets for one scene that lasts maybe ten seconds total.

I know I stated it in one of my earlier posts, but most of what she’s writing would fit better with a sequel for the reboot series, not DMC5. It would make her OOC writing of Vergil make sense, all the horror movie inspiration and body horror shit would fit better there, especially all the crappy dialogue too.

She somehow made Griffon even MORE annoying than in cannon.

BTW if I had to listen to poetry while fighting the final boss of a video game, I’d sooner turn my PS4 off. Not that poetry isn’t cool and all, but it cheapens the final fight and distracts you. It wouldn’t work.

EDIT: I realized this point made no sense without context, sorry. Porg made the Book of Urizen (the poetry book by William Blake referenced multiple times by V) either weirdly prophetic or made it out like Blake had inner knowledge of demon powers or... something along those lines, and V magically has the knowledge that reciting poetry from the book about Urizen will... harm him? Weaken him? Open a gate to hell (she mentions a portal appearing near him)? It’s very unclear, but she essentially rewrites Urizen as the final boss, and makes it three stages (V [Griffon recites some verses, which is what the first point was about], Vergil and Dante [this is where Vergil gets his arm ripped off btw], and then Nero) with all three of them reading poetry from the book to deal the “final blow” to Urizen. I’d much rather have Vergil be the final boss than have to go through a three-stage boss fight while every character I play as recites poetry to kill the boss.

She mentions Dante using Sin DT against Urizen but I’m pretty sure with her fuckery of the game’s events Dante can’t GET Sin DT? Because there’s no fight between Nero and Urizen where he’d intervene?

COMPLETELY IGNORES VERGIL’S DEVELOPMENT OF WANTING TO TRAVEL WITH HIS BROTHER THROUGH HELL TO ELIMINATE THE QLIPHOTH FUCK OFF.

Also she changed the lore of the Qliphoth so that it sprouts semi-naturally around every 500 or so years? So... shouldn’t leaving the Qliphoth roots be fine now? Since it’s natural?

Nico acts like growing back arms is totally normal

Wrote an INCREDIBLY shoe-horned in moment in the van with Dante filling Trish and Lady in about finding Vergil and everything that happened where, once again, Trish and Lady act almost completely nonplussed that Vergil is alive after 20+ years in hell, with about 9 of those ten years being trapped under Mundus’ control and corrupted by the Demon King

Seriously why is no one surprised in this fic that Vergil survived? Dante has a brief moment before finding him, but everyone finds out and accepts it like flipping a switch (once again--ESPECIALLY DANTE, which is NOT how the grieving process works)

Porg states that the ending is trash because the twins are fighting in hell, but completely ignores that most of Dante and Vergil’s lives have been built on conflict and they like fighting demons, especially Dante. Both of them were happy and doing what they love.

She also completely ignores through this entire thing that Dante was really fucking depressed in the novels leading up to 5 but hey I don’t even know if she can read.

I can vaguely agree that Trish and Lady were sidelined and they should’ve had a bigger role. However, I can’t fault the directors for not doing this, because they were already developing three playable characters with their own unique fighting styles. She writes all this shit about the story, writes notes about controls and mission layouts, but forgets that it takes a lot more than pressing a single button to code a game.

She just doesn’t know what she’s talking about. Seriously, none of these things are cohesive or edited properly, and despite her saying she wanted better for Vergil, or Nero, or Dante, or V, she writes all of them incredibly out of character and doing illogical actions. I just... I don’t get it.

The best part is--I can’t even tell her about these things, or give constructive criticism. She moderates the comments on her fic and isn’t afraid to delete anything she doesn’t agree with or can’t make a ‘passionate rant’ about.

[biinarysttars]

Pride!

Djkfdghd I have more feelings about Pride. Like a Lot more. I should put this under a readmore but I’m going to force everyone to read (or at least scroll past) my thoughts

favorite thing about them: He’s a fantastic antagonist! He was so well built up to, and he was almost a surprise. I remember when I first saw Selim Bradley... well okay I thought he was the Fuhrer’s butch daughter, Celine Bradley. But then after that my next thought was “man I sure hope there’s nothing Up with this kid”, and as I said that I immediately knew that there Was. I might’ve started out as an Envy stan, but I loved Selim the second I saw him & that translates into my feelings of him being a villain. So just. Everything, I guess, is my point

least favorite thing about them: I mean?? I sorta wish that there really was nothing up with that kid. But I’m not that upset about it, all things considered, because then there would be no Pride so!!

favorite line: There are So many. I’ll limit myself to 2 because those are the ones that showed up on the website lmao but here we go:

"Stop this. Stop this. PLEASE STOP!!!"-- His last words. That’s so!!! Compelling to me. The begging, the shame, the desperation. Idk, this is the first we’ve seen him emote through the whole show, and what we see is Pride’s fear.

"Wrath and like do not exist in me. There is no wrath, or lust, or sloth, or greed, or gluttony, or envy, such emotions have fled from my father. My name is Pride."/"I'm not angry. I'm never angry."-- I love this detail? Idk the Pride I RP @pridesshadows​ is absolutely OOC but this is something I’ve paid special attention to. Also! He’s only ever introduced himself, to my knowledge, with the phrase, “My name is Pride.” So. Idk, I love it when there’s Details for me to pay attention to

brOTP: Bold of you to assume Pride could have a friend. That being said I know that IC Envy doesn’t like him that much, but like. On the RP blog I absolutely Love RPing with Envy so that, I guess

OTP: Bold of you to assume Pride could land a S/O!!! I mean. I’d smooch. But also I run the risk of getting killed. So. Y’know, give or take lmao

nOTP: Pride x anyone. Don’t put him near anyone. A canon thing that’s been said is that he doesn’t care about anyone-- he doesn’t think of anyone as anything but as a tool, and the second that tool fails him, he throws it away and gets a new one. Lock Pride in a box. He’s my fave but he deserves to be alone

random headcanon: I have 3 and they’re all vaguely related

His persona as Selim Bradley isn’t entirely fake-- when he was Actually that young, he had a similar innocent and curious nature. This was torn down after a few century’s years of abuse and whatnot

Pride’s main role is to pose as a student and gather information-- keep up with trends and language and things

He likes to cook, even if he doesn’t eat. He just likes to Make Food & then throw it out I guess

unpopular opinion: I really like his ending. I don’t know if this is a “popular” opinion but I once saw someone complain about how he “becomes” Selim Bradley for real at the end, saying that it “redeemed” him. First off. No. Pride died! He’s dead now!! Now it’s Selim Bradley, a Good Boy who cares about birds and does his best and loves his mom!! I went on a whole rant, but ultimately, I love his ending because it’s not his. It’s Mrs Bradley’s. She lost her husband and her son, and she learned the truth about them, and probably wondered what she’d had to begin with!

songs i associate with them: Okay this one is solely about my RP blog dfjkghdf but I have a Playlist that details Pride’s feelings in 5 songs over basically the entire course of the RP “plotline”. It has All Eyes on Me, his feelings when Father left the homunculi and by default, him in charge of the plan; perfect nothing as he tries to fulfill the plan as it steadily slips through his fingers; ‘Cause I’m a Liar from when he starts treating people worse and worse and starts lying to himself about the plan still being a thing; ECHO is his character crisis as he struggles with a “purposeless” existence; and finally, Ghost Rule is him finally admitting to himself that he’s given up. Also!! Evan’s concept comes from For Forever from Dear Evan Hansen, and sometimes I think about their wedding to Voices in My Head from Be More Chill, and also sometimes in the shower I sing a very emotional Requiem again from DEH, and it’s Pride’s Feelings about everything he’s done

favorite picture of them:

I did it really quick so it’s kinda bad but fgdhjkgh please Enjoy

[worldoftheskeptic]

Rules

If you have any questions, or prefer discord rp while I'm hiding, you can contact me at mindmastered#0878.

Disclaimer: There are a lot of rules here and I understand if some are forgotten occasionally. If an ask breaks a rule, I’ll just delete it. My “do not” section has the real hard and fast rules, but if you break one once or twice, don’t worry about it. This is more here for reference as to how to interact, etc.

Do

👻 Cut me some slack ooc. I'm not always sure how or what to say, so if I'm terse or blunt it's because I'm awkward, not because I hate you.

👻 Translate emojis when sending memes. It’s not required, but occasionally the emojis don’t work on my phone so I’ll need clarification.

👻 Let me know if you need something made accessible for you!!! Bigger font, an image description, better contrast, you name it. If my theme is effed up or you can’t find something, tell me.

👻 Ask me to tag triggers/include them in your rules. I try to tag common ones, but sometimes I forget. Common triggers on this blog will be death, alcohol, some drug use, hospitals, and horror imagery.

👻 Send memes and IMs, especially if we’re mutuals, but being mutuals is not required to send them in. I will still be somewhat selective, however. If I don’t reply to an IM, I was busy when I received it and forgot to answer.

👻 Plot with me (I like plotted threads better than one liners, and an open line of communication makes plots 100% better). That said, if you come to me to plot, I don’t usually have an idea ready and would appreciate more than a “hey, can we plot?” if we’ve never spoken before. I’m also better at plotting ongoing threads because I have an idea of how our characters will interact, so if you start something small with a meme, etc. I’ll probably have more ideas.

👻 Have a rules page accessible on your blog. An about page is required for OC blogs so I can establish who your character is.

👻 Tell me if you have a side blog you want me to check out! I might not be able to get to it during a busy day, but I do want to know about it. That said:

👻 Give me a couple of days or so to follow back. I’m actually not online for most of the day despite having my queue running and occasionally I’m just too exhausted to go through all of your blog info at the moment.

👻 Like starter calls and send memes even if I haven’t answered a previous one. I run out of inspiration sometimes, but I still want to write with people.

👻 Answer my opens, tagged #open or #open rp. These are open to all, no matter what icon style or formatting I’m using. You can also tag me in random starters, especially if we’re mutuals.

👻 Let me know if you want a reply to an ongoing thread after a week. Sometimes I lose them or tumblr eats my replies without me knowing. Sometimes I also need a little help figuring out how to reply at that point.

👻 Ask for another verse or AU, even if we haven’t interacted yet. I default to New Girls verse for Ghostbusters 2016 characters, but that doesn’t have to be the case for you.

👻 Reblog headcanons and art I’ve tagged you in. Basically, if you’ve been tagged, you may reblog. Don’t reblog headcanons otherwise.

👻 Write violence, limited gore, and angst with me. I’ll let you know if it’s too much, don’t worry.

👻 Ship with me. Please ask if you’re not sure, but as long as there’s chemistry, I probably already ship it.

👻 On a related note, do ask before writing smut with me. I’m only comfortable with it with certain people (over 18 years of age, thanks) and even then I have a hard time taking anything past an R rating (I don’t really wanna talk about dicks, yo). We have to have spoken ooc for this to occur at all. Threads like this will be tagged appropriately, but I will only put them under a readmore if asked (nicely) or if I feel uncomfortable with the content myself. I will not write incest. I will not write smut with characters under 18. I won’t follow if you happen to write either, even in cases of “technical” incest (characters were raised as siblings, etc.). I’m looking at you, Royal Tenenbaums.

Don’t

👻 Send drabble prompts involving your muse or dual promo requests if our muses don’t have an established relationship through rp. They’re just a lot harder to answer without one.

👻 Start a thread if you are an OOC blog, a self insert, or a blog for a living/recently dead person. You may still send memes not intended to start a thread, however, and anons whenever you want.

👻 Harass or bully me or other people. I’ll use my best judgement on this, but if I catch anyone doing this, they will be blocked. Spam blogs will also be blocked. DO NOT send hate on my behalf. Additionally, do not contact me via IM in order to force interaction with anyone. If you send me rude messages, I will block you immediately.

👻 Reblog memes from me. I don’t believe in reblog karma, but I also don’t want a ton of irrelevant notes on my feed. I reblog from the source, meme blogs, or dead blogs if the other two cannot be found. It should be easy to find the source.

👻 Send in asks simply greeting my muse (Hi, my name is X.) Instead, jump right in and say something he can really snark at.

👻 Send starters over asks. I love IC asks, or asks from memes I have reblogged, but if you just wanna send a starter, tag me in it. This is also so I can control the number of threads I have, and so I don’t have to move it off the ask post later. I do that enough for memes (when I feel like it. I don’t always make a new post if it’s a short para thread though I do prefer regular posts to ask posts).

👻 Reblog/turn my ooc posts into discourse. They’re not conversation starters for other people. It clogs my notes. My IM is always open instead.

👻 Dispute my headcanons for my character. I do try to stick to canon, but it’s easy to interpret differently between individuals. This is my interpretation.

👻 Have your muse be related to mine, or know things they shouldn’t about my character unless we’ve previously discussed this. Occasionally I will be uncomfortable with the level of intimacy your character expresses towards mine. If Peter seems uncomfortable, it is a good sign to pull back and develop the relationship before proceeding with further intimate gestures.

👻 I am unlikely to follow back if exclusivity is required for interaction with you. Because I play fairly rare characters, I feel it is unfair of me to limit who I rp with on a basis of who I interact with already. I will, however, be selective with partners based on writing style and character written.

Please note:

👻 If I don’t know your fandom, I may have trouble writing with you and may not follow back.

👻 I will unfollow if my rules are repeatedly broken (how many times will be at my discretion), or I feel uncomfortable with the content of your blog (a lot of NSFW image posts are a good example of the latter. I am often in public when scrolling through my dash and would like to avoid accidentally exposing others who do not wish to see that kind of content). I mostly block based on negative ooc interaction or harassment. I am working on confronting others if my rules are broken, but occasionally I will not if I feel anxious about contacting you or never followed you in the first place. Feel free to contact me if I do unfollow you as long as you do so in a polite manner. Usually it’s just a tumblr glitch.