#(ominous yodeling in the distance)

[plotbunbun]

it would logically follow, then, that - operating within this hypothetical paradigm - that i mcfricking lose it,

[kabukiaku]

ominous yodeling heard in the distance

[loveanimalstory-blog]

Why turkeys circle dead things—the creepy vigil, explained

Back in 2017, the 'net became briefly hooked into a video of turkeys holding a weird, circular vigil round the corpse of an unfortunate cat within the street. Two years later, the video has started circulating again—those dead birds are back, baby, and they are better than ever. There's certainly something compelling about what seems to be an avian black mass afoot. But what's really happening, consistent with a 2017 blog post from the National Wild Turkey Federation's Mark Hatfield, has more in common with an Instagram influencer's half-hearted attempt at a full-of-the-moon ritual than any true witchery. In Hatfield's words, “turkeys are very basic.” The birds, Hatfield explained are just keeping their distance while deciding whether or not the extremely dead cat in question could be a threat. Hatfield's colleague Tom Hughes alleged to National Geographic at the time that the behavior of the cat, whether it had been fully dead or still dying, may have struck the birds as strange and prompted an investigation. The circular nature of their march is simply a result of their instinct to remain within the security of their flock. In other words, what seems like extremely ominous behavior to human eyes is really just a bunch of birds who can't decide how scared they ought to be of roadkill. It's also possible they've totally moved on from examining or trying to intimidate the feline, and instead, have kind of forgotten why they're following each other. "It's commonplace for them to urge into those dances where they chase one another around," California Department of Fish and Wildlife's Scott Gardner told The Verge back in 2017. Given the sort-of-pathetic reality behind this almost-super-hardcore behavior, you would possibly end up wondering: just how stupid are turkeys? the solution is: not particularly stupid. Even domesticated turkeys, which are bred into a fat and helpless existence so we'd feast upon their subpar flesh once or twice a year, don't deserve their bad reputation. the thought that these birds are so unintelligent that they will drown within the rain is definitely debunked. a minimum of some turkey owners swears they have been ready to train their flocks to reply to herding and anticipate feeding times. nobody goes to urge a turkey to unravel a puzzle or play fetch, but they manage to call at the planet just fine. And simply because turkeys are susceptible to lose hours of their lives running in a circle around a cat corpse doesn't suggest you should not take them seriously. they will actually be quite terrifying. Because wild turkeys rely heavily on establishing and maintaining so-called pecking orders within their flocks, any animal that acts frightened of them is susceptible to get bullied. Humans are not any exception, and other people who interact with wild turkeys without working to determine dominance—making loud noises, throwing tennis balls, wielding a squirt gun—can find themselves in trouble. During wild turkey breeding season especially, male turkeys are known to urge aggressive with other animals (or reflective surfaces). Once a bird gets bold, it is often hard to reestablish your own dominance—which can eventually cause animals growing violent enough that animal control has got to step in. So while it'd seem rude (or just unnecessary) to run into your yard yodeling and waving a brush whenever a flock of turkeys starts messing together with your bird feeder, you're actually doing them a favor by keeping them scared of humans. So pack up any tempting seeds or crops in your yard, set a sprig bottle by the door, and canopy all the mirrors: these creepy fowl won't be summoning demons within the streets, but you'll end up with a requirement to exorcise them.