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mystic-myrtille · 3 years ago

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Music of the heart [Marinette Dupain Cheng x Luka Couffaine]

So anyone remember this idea I had for Luka the street musician?Yeah, I've finally turned that into a fic :D

Apologies for any typos or grammar mistakes in advance, hope you enjoy!

After Marinette hugged Alya goodbye, finally exited the school and walked through the park towards the bakery, she thought about the only good thing about this sunny, warm friday.

That it was almost over.

Because Marinette had an absolutely horrible friday.

It has started when her akuma alarm had gone off one hour before her actual alarm, so she had jumped out of bed, tried her best to fight the akuma with her half asleep partner while still being half asleep herself. The duo had somehow managed to end the fight before school started. Marinette had considered that to be a good thing, until the universe had decided to reward her with a surprise history test, for which Marinette had not studied the day before due to an akuma attack from the evening before, which really begs the question if it really was a good thing they had defeated the akuma from this morning so quickly.

That had pretty much set the standart for the rest of the day, when Chloe was also in a bad mood and letting it out on Marinette with mean comments on Marinette's new jacket that she had made herself.

Later some other student had accidentally bumped into her during lunch, leading her to drop her plate, which already was humiliating enough, only for Lila to step in and to make sure that every single student in the cafeteria was informed about how awfully clumsy poor Marinette could be while playing the helpful, selfless person by helping her up. Which later was the katalyst for Alya to hype her up, rambling how great of a person Lila is.

But the cherry on top was a thing that Adrien had said to her after lunch, walking to their classroom.

"It was really nice of Lila to help you during lunch! I think she's improoving, so maybe you guys can finally be friends."

As soon as the words had left his lips, Marinette had felt a sting in her heart and she had tried really hard to not snap at Adrien. And had failed.

She had shouted at him, about how he still decided to ignore all of Lila's red flags, how she had clearly tried to humiliate Marinette and how, under no circumstamces, was she ever ready to forgive Lila, let alone befriend her.

Even if she had regretted her outbreak the second the words left her mouth, the damage has already been done.

Before her eyes, she could still see his disappointed expression when he told her she was mean and that it was unfair to not give Lila a chance. And then he had walked off, leaving her all by herself in the corridor as she tried to hold back tears.

Marinette let out a sigh. She really felt like she had screwed up big time.

"Are you okay, Marinette?", she heard a quiet voice from her pocket and looked down to her purse, where her eyes met Tikki's.

Marinette shrugged.

"I don't know, Tikki. Today was just kinda..."

The kwami streched her head out of the purse, pressing it against her holder's hand.

"It's going to be fine, I'm sure of it. Everyone has bad days," she noted.

Marinette bit her lip.

"Yeah and my quota of bad days is probably above average," she let out another sigh and petted the little creature, "I really have surprisingly bad luck, considering my power is good luck."

Tikki smiled gently and squeezed Marinette's finger.

"I'm sure everything will work out. You're a really strong person, Marinette. I think you can overcome any kind of bad luck."

"Still, needing to overcome things constantly gets exhausting after a while."

Marinette gave Tikki a quick smile, then looked away to blink away some tears, as the Kwami assumed.

Tikki continued to pat her holder's hand when they suddenly came to a halt, picking up some music in the distance. While Tikki disappeared back into the purse, Marinette looked around and soon found the source of the music on a bench a few meters away.

"Oh... it's him."

The boy had it's eyes closed, it looked like he was meditating while the wind brushed through his black and blue hair as his hands danced along the strings of his accoustic guitar, creating the wonderful sound.

She had met the blue-haired guitarist before. Though, "met" was maybe not the right word, because she hasn't actually had any sort of conversation with him. But she had run into him a few times, when he had picked a spot somewhere near the big tourist attractions of the city. She had already seen him at the Eiffel tower, the Louvre, L'arc de Triomphe or Notre dame. In a crowded place, it was easier to attract an audience, she assumed. At least a few people were always listening, maybe gave him a few coins before moving on with their day.

And when they would, he would always give them this kind, genuine smile that Marinette, for some reason, found incredibly attractive. His eyes were always filled with so much appreciation, wordlessly thanking perople for their generosity, for taking a few minutes of their day to turn their attention to him and his sweet tunes.

He had also given that smile to Marinette once before, when she had donated him 2 euros, She had been out with her friends to try out another wild idea to grab Adrien's attention somehow. She had walked over to him, put the coin in the open guitar case and he had looked up from his instrument and had given her this wonderful smile of his. And she hadn't stopped thinking about that smile for the rest of the day. In fact, she had been so distracted by it that she wasn't even that disappointed when their Adrien plan hadn't worked out.

Marinette figured that he must have an easy time attracting people's attention, because she found herself mesmerized by his music. Even though she never recognized the songs he was playing, it always felt... right, in a way. Understanding. Familiar.

Marinette wasn't sure how to describe what exactly the music made her feel accurately, but she didn't think about it any further when she walked a few steps closer, sat down in the grass, closed her eyes and just tuned everything out but the music.

She felt every note, every chord echoing in her heart. It was a strange feeling, but still nice. It was as if something would pat her shoulder, wrap an arm around her, whisper in her ear that everything will be fine. That Lila was an idiot but it would be fine. That Adrien was wrong but it would be fine. Everything would be fine.

Marinette felt a shift in the Melody, the hopeful, optimistic notes turning more into a relaxing tune, wrapping her in a warm blanket and lying her down on a soft, pink cloud. Up in the sky, where nothing could harm her. Where everything was peaceful. Where she could simply exist in peace.

Marinette could've wondered when the last time was she felt that way. She could've also wondered about other things, like Adrien or Lila or Hawkmoth or anything, really. And yet she found herself not thinking about any of these. Her head was empty, free of any negative thoughts.

Marinette felt herself smiling. She hadn't felt this relaxed in a while and she was so in the moment that she didn't really notice that the melody slowly faded out. She still kept her eyes closed and took in that calm feeling that had taken over her body and mind.

"Seems like you enjoyed it."

Marinette flinched a little, opened her eyes and looked up to meet the blue eyes of the musician sitting across her on the bench. Wow, those were some pretty eyes.

She forced her brain to form words, but quickly realized that it couldn't, so she just nodded. The musician smiled. "I'm glad," he said. His voice was pretty, too. Why were so many things about this boy so pretty?

Marinette smiled back.

"What- uh, what you play sounds really nice," she complimented him, not only because it was true but she wanted to avoid awkward silence.

"Though I'm a little surprised to see you here."

'What are you saying, Marinette,' she mentally scolded herself, 'What kind of conversation starter is that?'

But the guitarist didn't really seem to mind. His smile didn't fade. Instead, he lifted an eyebrow.

"Why would it be so unusual to sit in a park, all by myself, strumming my guitar?", he asked curiously.

Marinette could feel herself blushing and looked away.

"Uh... it's not that you're not allowed to be here, it's just... well, normally I see you in more crowded places, you know, where you can attract an audiende..."

Marinette felt stupid for asking such a dumb question. As if he wasn't allowed to be in the park. He probably thought she was weird.

"Well," he answered, without a hint of judgement, "sometimes it's nice to just enjoy music on my own, without all those people surrounding me."

He lightly strummed a few chords.

"Besides, it appears I still was able to attract an audience after all," he poked his tongue out and it made Marinette blush even harder.

The way he had just said that... was he flirting with her? And more importantly, was she a into it?

"I'm sorry," she heard him say and she looked up. He wasn't smiling anymore, he rather looked embarassed.

"I didn't want to make you uncomfortable," he told her.

"Oh no, don't worry, I'm not uncomfortable, I was just- uhh..."

Marinette bit her lip nervously.

"I mean, of course you'd find an audience anywhere. You played such a beautiful melody, it would be a shame not to listen," she finally said, "Although I didn't recognize the song you were playing."

The boy smiled again in response.

"Well, that's because...", he thought about what he's going to say for a moment, "you could say I was playing a melody I heard in my head when I noticed you."

As soon as the world had left his lips, his eyes widened and he nervously bit his lip.

"Sorry, that came out wrong, that sounded kind of weird..."

"It's fine," said Marinette, a little too loud, "that wasn't weird. At least I don't think it was." The boy relaxed again and let go of his lip. He really had nice lips....

Marinette tried to not focus too much on them.

"Uhm, but still, what exactly do you mean by 'hearing a melody when you noticed me'?", she asked curiously.

The boy took a few seconds to think about an answer.

"I'm not sure how to explain it," he admitted, "but when I look at other people... it's like I can hear what's in their hearts."

He strummed his guitar.

"I hear their feelings and emotions... and so much more. It's like... I listen to their song and I have an idea what kind of person they might be. And the more time I spend with someone, the clearer the song becomes... if that makes sense. The songs I play I pick up from other people's hearts."

He was biting his lips again nervously.

Marinette got rid of the though of his lips (somehow) and thought about his explanation for a moment.

"So... what you played earlier... that is what I have in my heart?", she asked. That seem to have relaxed him, because he stopped biting his lip and seemed relieved that she didn't see him as a total weirdo.

"Well, I think I did" he answered, "What do you say? You know your heart best, after all."

Marinette thought about it for a moment, then shrugged.

"I'm not exactly sure I know what's going on in here," she put her hand over the area where her heart was located, "it's really... I guess you could say complicated."

The musician nodded.

"Complicated, you say.... like this?"

He put his hand to the fret board again and played the same melody he had played before, but this time, he added some extra notes and more complicated chords. It sounded fuller and, in a way, more complete than before.

"Yeah, that seems more accurate," she said jockingly. That made him laugh and that in return did funny things to her heart. She prayed he wouldn't be able to pick up on that.

After their laughter died down, the sat in silence for a short while. It wasn't as awkard as Marinette imagined it would be with a stranger. She actually felt kind of comfortable.

"If I'm being honest," she said, "I think you got an incredibly beautiful gift. Playing people's hearts like that is... I think it's very fascinating."

The boy stared at her for a few seconds until his lips curved into that beautiful smile of his.

"You know, I never introduced myself," he noted, "my name is Luka."

"Pleasure to meet you, Luka," she answered, "I am Marinette."

"Marinette," Luka repeated slowly, tilting his head a little, "yeah, that fits. A pretty name for a pretty girl."

Marinette couldn't help but giggle. At this point, she was certain he must've heard the nervousness, the admiration, the... whatever that feeling he gave her when he smiled at her was in her heart. But for some strange reason, she really didn't mind anymore.

Maybe that's what gave him the courage to invite her to a glass of orange juice, to exchange phone numbers, to take a walk along the Seine together and then walk her home. They laughed, they talked, they learned about their hearts and even if Marinette wasn't able to hear Luka's heart, something told her that there were the same feelings inside of his.

And after a long, eventful Friday, Marinette's day ended with a text from Luka, wishing her a good night and asking if they could meet up again, and it was at this moment she decided that this day might've not been so bad after all.

#ml #ml fanfic #fanfic by me #Lukanette #pro Lukamari #marinette dupain cheng #Luka couffaine

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fly-flower-fanfics · 4 years ago

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I liked the previous one i requested so much I wanted to come to you for my new request. May i request a Spencer Reid x Male/ftm reader (your choice) where the MC has previously long hair and one day he walks to work with a buzz cut? The rest is up to you. And thank you just for reading the ask

Absolutely! I love this honestly. I��ll try and do it justice for you. 🥺👉🏼👈🏼 I’m also sorry it took so long. Things have been hectic lately... I know it’s not a super long fic, but I hope that it’s still worth the wait!

Buzz Off

Spencer Reid x Trans Male Reader

Warnings: Slight transphobia mentioned

~~~~~~~~~

I closed my eyes, inhaling deeply. Today was the day I was actually doing it. I was actually getting a hair cut. Not that it was a big deal to anyone else, but it was to me, making today a big day.

I had been out as trans for almost fifteen years now, coming out when I was sixteen years old. The team didn’t really know I was trans as I had gotten top surgery and started testosterone by then.

The only ones who knew I was trans was Spencer and Hotch. Spencer knew because I wanted to be honest about my past with him. Hotch knew because I’d had to explain some slight complications in my old information.

However, regardless of all that, I never got rid of my long, almost waist length hair.

I was always holding onto a little piece of my past. My parents had been very transphobic toward me, never allowing me to cut my hair or buy masculine clothing. I had to do everything all by myself once I had moved out. Yet I kept my long hair in an attempt to please my parents even after I changed.

It didn’t work, and they dropped all contact with me. Today, I had finally gotten up the courage to cut my hair as I had always wanted to: a buzz cut. Nothing too dramatic, but dramatic enough to match my personality. And it was long overdue for a change.

I opened my eyes, smiling a bit to myself as I got out of the car and locked it. I hadn’t yet gotten a call from Hotch saying I needed to come in, so I hoped I’d have enough time to get this hair cut.

Once I sat in the chair and the coat-like covering was draped over me, I couldn’t stop smiling. I explained to the hair dresser, Debi, exactly what I wanted, and she was obviously excited for me. That made me feel all the more excited for it myself. I had been going to her for years and for years she had been trying to get me to loosen up and cut my hair.

We had been high school friends, so she knew all about my transition and why I never had cut my hair. But now, she was super excited, hyping me up the whole time.

I kept my eyes closed most of the time, not wanting to spoil the surprise. I was hoping, praying, that it would look good on me. It was hard to focus on the doubts when Debi kept saying how handsome I looked and how Spencer was absolutely going to melt when he saw me.

Spencer and I had been dating for about a year now. He knew of my being trans and how my parents treated me. He never met them, and granted, he didn’t want to. However, he fully supported me not cutting my hair, even though he wasn’t a huge fan of why I wasn’t.

“You’re all set, hun!” Debi exclaimed, putting her razor down. She stood in front of me as I opened up my eyes. “Are you ready?!”

I nodded eagerly, and she stepped aside, allowing me to look in the large mirror in front of me. My jaw dropped as I saw my reflection.

It was perfect.

Tears welled up in my eyes as I reached up to touch the shaved spots. The short hair looked absolutely perfect on me, and I’d be lying if my self esteem didn’t skyrocket because of it.

“Thank you so much, Debi. I love it. I should’ve listened to you sooner.”

She gave me a pointed look, but couldn’t stop herself from smiling as well. “Did I not tell you so?”

At that moment, my phone went off. I checked it, seeing as it was for work. “You did, Debi. But duty calls. Let me pay you so I can get outta here.”

Within three minutes, I was back on the road. I was smiling the whole time I drove. Part of me felt a little guilty for being so giddy since there had been a murder, but I eased my conscience by reminding myself I was giddy over my own personal experiences and the team seeing me, not the murder itself. I only wanted to see the team’s reactions.

I walked into the bullpen, my eyes darting around wildly as I tried to avoid eye contact with everyone. Suddenly, I felt very, very shy, and I was overly aware of the cool air on the back of my neck. Has it always been this cold in here?

“Oh. My. Goodness.” Garcia was the first to notice me. She rushed up to me, a bright smile on her face. “Oh! Look at you!”

Her excited exclamations tugged over JJ and Emily’s attention. Both of them smiled at me.

“Hey, lookin’ good, Y/N,” JJ said. “Suits you.”

“I like it. Different than what I’m used to seeing you with, but it looks really good on you,” Emily said, nodding in approval.

“Thanks, guys,” I replied with a light blush dusting my cheeks.

Derek was the next to come in and notice me. “Hey, hey, hey! Look at you! Gettin’ all snazzy with a new hairdo. New you; I’m digging it.”

I laughed and nudged him with my shoulder as he reached out to fluff what was left of my hair. “Thanks, Derek.”

Hotch came in, took a glance at me, and gave me a small smile and nod. “Ready for work?” It wasn’t much of a reaction, but after working with Hotch for this long, I knew that was his approval. He was proud of me.

All of us got up to go to the conference room when a soft gasp took my attentions way from Hotch and the others.

Spencer was standing behind me, his lips parted in a slight shock. It then turned into a large smile as he walked up to me and took my hands in his.

“You did it,” he mumbled softly, bringing a hand up to my cheek.

“Yeah,” I breathed out softly. “It was time. Long overdue, if I’m being honest.”

He ran his hand up the side of my face, rubbing it over my head. His smile widened, if that was even possible. “God, you look so good.”

My cheeks darkened with a blush. “Yeah. I think I’ll miss the man bun, though. Maybe at a later date, I’ll get it back. But for now? For me? Yeah... I do look good.”

Spencer pulled me into a tight hug, placing a kiss on the top of my head. “I’m so proud of you, Y/N. So proud,” he whispered.

Tears pricked my eyes. It was so satisfying and freeing to let that last but of past me go. To let it disappear forever. To finally be me. I clutched his shirt tightly, reveling in his soft praises.

“Thank you, Spence.”

A throat cleared, and the two of us separated, seeing Hotch standing outside the door of the conference room. He gestured to the file in his hand with his eyes.

“I am very glad you guys had this moment together. It’s a good move for you, too, Y/N. But evil does not wait for a haircut. Please, both of you, join us.”

My entire face heated, and I nodded quickly. “O-of course. Sorry, sir.”

Hotch gave me a small smile before disappearing back into the room.

I took Spencer’s hand. “I guess we better get in there; he is right.”

Spencer gave my hand a small squeeze and pressed another kiss onto my forehead. “He is. Maybe we can celebrate later tonight after the case.”

I laughed a little bit as we walked to the room. “Don’t have so much hope for the ease of this case. You should know better, Spence! You of all people.”

He let out a light laugh. “Perhaps. I’m just really happy for you.”

I took a seat beside him around the table as Penelope began to show the pictures and explained what we knew about the case.

I was happy for me, too.

#x male reader #gay #spencer reid x male reader #spencer reid fanfiction #spencer reid #criminal minds #criminal minds x reader #spencer reid x trans male #x trans male reader #x trans reader #spencer reid x reader #criminal minds x male reader

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peeterparkr · 3 years ago

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red; tom's version|one.

chapter one: sad, beautiful tragic. “Long handwritten note deep in your pocket”

pairing: Tom Holland x Reader (tom's not famous here) story summary: you’re reminiscing through your relationship months after the heartbreak and breakup. Wondering if it went wrong from the very start when Tom arrived at New York, and him being a cautionary tale or if the problems came along the way. Perhaps the key to find back your way to him is going back through the nice things before the heartbreak came. Or is it too painful to go all over again?

chapter summary: you haven't seen him since he ditched you, after months of wearing plaid you go out and realize he's back in new york warnings: angsty, I mean it's a breakup, swearing. word count: 7.3k playlist (updated after each chapter, including Red songs+ other for the chapter): Spotify | Apple Music

fic masterlist next chapter

a/n: Hi, I couldn't wait to share it so I said, screw it, I'm posting this. You don't know how excited I am to write this and share it with you. As you know, this is inspired by Red by Taylor Swift and will hurt. So I expect us all to be crumpled up pieces of paper wearing scarves by the end of this. (perennial is still coming, I'm just waiting on a few people who're reading it). SPECIAL THANKS TO @erodasghosts for reading it and hyping me up and helping me figure this all out. I hope you guys all like it as much as I did. The story is set in New York. Please give feedback!

One month after the breakup.

Strong whiskey, on the rocks. That was his drink of choice that night. The night before had been a beer. You knew you could imagine the taste of his lips by only looking at him. You wondered if he’d gone there for a second night for the same reason you had.

When you had seen him across the place the night before, you had tried to decide how to feel. We always think we will react one way or another when we see our official heartbreak walking through. Victorious as he is perfectly dressed, with his hair flowing.

He hadn’t brought her. Which you didn’t know how to feel about.

The day before you had not been alone, Jules, Matty, and Lula were there.

“Shit, the axolotl at 10 o'clock, you’ve got to be shitting me,” Lourdes, Lula, had whispered before sipping her drink, a Long Island Tea. “We are celebrating she’s doing better, can’t fucking believe this,” she hissed at Jules who only lifted her chin slightly to see who she was referring to. “What the fuck is he doing here? Ay, es que, con qué huevos se atreve a venir aquí? Que no mame.” [with what balls did he dare to come here? He shouldn’t fuck with us. ]

You loved hanging out with Lula and listening to her very refined Spanish cursing.

“It’s not him,” Julia said.

You tried looking back to see who they were referring to. “Who is—?”

“Y/N, wait I just noticed the haircut!” Matt pointed out, reaching over, getting your attention back to them and not at whatever they were referring to. “It looks great. It’s like a new you!”

This new you. The one that had been screwed over twice. Men really have the nerve when it comes to breaking hearts. They recklessly go in and let you believe love comes in all shades of colors, passionate red like the roses they send, and tender pinks like your sweet innocence that they end up stealing. But they never tell you it’ll be you all alone in a dark room with shades of grey under a flickering light that barely warms you.

The new you, which was still a bit lost. Your old self was a stranger to you now. You had no idea who this new you was, she was quiet now. Didn’t have a heart because someone had stolen it and broken it and left it behind a dumpster. Still trying to find it. The new you wasn't.. you.

Your friends were glad, however, they finally got you to go out again. After weeks of wearing plaid and watching Fleabag, and even considering watching Greys Anatomy, a low point, you had finally decided to come back to see if there was any sunshine left for you.

It’s important to point out that you had been broken-hearted and almost crazy when the breakup had happened. Very… delusional. You were not proud of the way you’d reacted. Although you wouldn’t have reacted any other way.

The city had been quiet, the red lights seemed to last longer, and the crowds would often swallow you. The city you once loved was now an open book of a relationship that seemed real, should’ve known it was all fiction.

In your dreams they’d be bright, colorful. The village is aglow. Cold days with warm hearts. Like his.

You’d been cold ever since.

“Ah, yeah, the haircut. Got it today. Lula’s idea” The haircut had come as the solution to a problem that would never be solved. As if cutting your hair meant there was something you had the power on. You didn’t.

How stupid was it? You couldn’t control your life.

“It suits her well, doesn’t it?” Lula admitted proudly.

You still had his picture engraved in your heart. You still dreamed he would come back and say it was all a nightmare.

“It’s nice, I’m glad to have you back,” Jules commented. Julia had probably been the most surprised with the news of the breakup, she had almost gone and killed Tom when he had….unimportant. She hadn’t, though, and she had yet to tell you the reason why. Julia had been mysterious since.

“I’m glad to be back,” you confirmed. You’d ordered a beer, and maybe you shouldn’t have. Stella Artois, his one favorite. You pocketed the beer cap. “Though I was not gone.”

Matt watched you, him and Julia had recently started dating. Best friends since kids who just recently confessed their feelings for each other, took them long enough. “How back are you, though?”

“Meaning?” You asked, taking a sip.

Matt shrugged, “I could introduce you to some friends from work, there’s this hot guy—“

“No,” you interrupted him, leaving the bottle down as you had almost choked. “No, no. Not in the dating area yet. Won’t be in a long time. Still healing.”

Lula still had her eyes glued elsewhere. “Healing from a bullet hole, y/n, whatever you’re doing isn’t working, and band aids won’t fix it—Jules it is, I swear to god it’s him.”

“It’s not him,” Julia rolled her eyes.

“Ay, que sí!” [he is]

“Who?” You asked.

Julia took your hands, “you know Lula,” she rolled her eyes. “I love that you ordered a beer.”

“Yeah,” you gulped. “Beer is universal language for men as in: ‘don’t get close to me.’” A lesson someone dear had taught you once.

Matt tilted his head in agreement, “Yeah.”

“Really?” Lula frowned, “should’ve ordered one. Next time I’ll ask for my drink but instead of a glass I’ll ask them to put it in a beer bottle.”

“Wouldn't it be easier to order a beer?” Matt suggested.

“But then I’d break our tradition.”

Matt watched her, “you really are something.”

You chuckled.

“Why is beer seen as not—feminine?” Matt questioned.

Julia shrugged. “It’s beyond me, really. It’s a drink.”

“Like does my drink make me less of a man?” Matt watched his glass, another Long Island Tea. A stupid inside joke you all had.

“No,” you admitted. “But you know how society is. Since it’s sweet, it’s got to be—“

“Oh, no, no, I love you, y/n, but tonight I don’t want you lecturing us on it, no, tonight we are having fun, ok?” Lula reminded you. “We will not talk about femininity or lack of a beer—or whatever your agenda is up to these days, which, hey! Why does y/n get to break the rule?” Lula questioned. “No Long Island Tea?

Julia glared at her, “Because she can do whatever she wants tonight,” she hissed and then turned to you. “But how are you feeling? It’s your first time going out in months, is it as fun?” Julia was the one to try to cheer you up the most.

No, it wasn’t fun.

“I—feel good!” You lied. Although you were not. But you guessed that’s the response they wanted after seeing you laying down on the ground and crying yourself to sleep. Staring at windows and walking down in the rain. They wanted you to feel better.

Your body was covered in scars.Though, they were from adventures.

“Bullshit,” Lula intruded. “You seem sad. Maybe I’ll get some shots,” she announced before going to get some.

“Well,” you chuckled. “My first time going out and you bring me back to the place where it all started?” You answered cynically but then shrugged. “I’m—I…no. I just—It’s weird. I still see him everywhere, and as I’m here it’s like watching a movie of our greatest moments,” you admitted. “Like hey, look over there, it’s Tom and Y/N’s greatest moments,” you stated, Lula got back. “Let’s start memory lane…”and you sighed and continued with the best presenter voice you had. “Here you’ll wonder how the hell did it go so wrong since they were so perfect, what the hell went wrong, when did it turn into some sad stupid love affair. You’ll be asking yourself hey, they seemed in love, over there, they danced! Over there… they sang a song together! See over there? There was a fucking jukebox in which they have memories! Oh they have memories there too! And you’ll ask yourself, he made it seem real, what the hell happened?” You sighed exhaustedly. “What happened? What the fuck happened? How was I so stupid?” You ran your hands through your face.

Your friends only watched you, with pity, sadness. Even Lula had turned her gaze guilty.

You cleared your throat, “I’m sorry. I’m sorry.”

“No,” Lula sighed, “it’s our fault for bringing you here. We’re fucking idiots. Besides he is—Julia I swear to god, he is there.” Lula raised her hand and Julia quickly pulled it down.

Julia bit her lip, “I—hadn’t realized how much Tom there is here.”

“Yeah.”

“He called me—“Matt had started.

“No, no, we can’t talk about him, baby,” Julia reminded him. Matt widened his eyes and nodded.

You blinked, “no, it’s—He called you? Tom?” Why had Tom called Matty? What for?

“Yeah, had a missed call,” Matt explained, ignoring his girlfriend. “I—it was this morning.”

You felt your chest twist. “Yeah, I get a lot of those too.”

Perhaps he wanted to talk to you and thought Matty was dumb enough to give you the phone.

Julia glared at Matt. “We promised not to—“

“No, hey,” you stopped her. “I—sorry, I brought him up.”

“But we shouldn’t talk about him,” Julia insisted. “Tonight is all about having fun,” she stated as she handed everyone their shots.

“No, it’s alright,” you said. “I’m fine talking about it.”

Lula turned her gaze to you. “Shouldn’t you hate him?”

Were you supposed to hate someone who gave you something so beautiful? Just because it’s over doesn’t mean you have to look back and hate it.

“No,” you answered simply.

Matt watched you. “Wait, really?”

You took a deep breath. “Yeah, I’m—I decided I’m thankful for everything. He really… I… I mean I knew from the start he was trouble. But he got me to get rid of Will. So I’m thankful for Tom. He showed me some beautiful things about him, about myself and… I’m thankful. Even the part when he broke my heart.”

It was a lie. Partly. You had been so full of doubts that you only tried wondering why it had gone so wrong. Or course, the lie was there. His lies. But how could any of it be a lie?

Julia smiled gently, “You’re really a grown up.”

“Or very stupid.” Lula commented.

“Thanks, Lula, I appreciate it,” you rolled your eyes. “I… well, I’ve gotta admit I was pretty stupid.”

Lula shrugged, “Hey, I don’t blame you, boy came in with an accent, he had a cute smile, he was hot, I must admit, and he wasn’t one of those Brooklyn fuckboys that take you to the rooftop and offer you a whiteclaw to watch the sunrise together,” Lula gave in.

“Oh, and they take candid pictures, and they say that their phone camera isn’t as good as their polaroid,” Julia laughed, “But hey, you’re lucky they took you to the rooftop, they never take anyone there, they took you there just because you’re…”

“Different,” Julia, Lula and you chanted.

Matt laughed, “You guys are the worst.”

“Anyway,” Lula said. “We should drink these,” she pointed at the shot glasses as she raised her own. “I came here to get drunk. So, to Y/N being thankful Tom was a piece of shit even when the boy had a dreamy accent?”

You closed your eyes, and let out a defeated dry chuckle. “Yes, to that.”

“To the piece of shit, then!” Lula grinned as the shots clinked and were downed. You instantly regretted drinking it.

Lula scowled as she had her eyes glued back at the bar, “It’s him, Julia, it’s him! What is he doing here? Pendejo, I swear to god I’ll go kill him.” She was furious, and you tried once again following her gaze.

The bar was crowded, red lights crossed around the place, with girls walking with tall heels, trying to smile and nod at guys who were talking to them but clearly were not of interest to them. Friends laughing, people flirting. You didn’t know who your friends were watching.

But the bar seemed to be enough of a reminder of him. How he had made you feel like crowds were never there, and how whenever you had been with him everything disappeared just to be with him.

“Who are we killing?” You questioned.

“Is new y/n a murderer?” Asked Matt. Matt and Julia were your oldest friends. The three of you grew up in Staten Island, and now moved to the crowded places.

Lula coughed. “Hope she is.” Lula, on the other hand, you’ve met in college, she was a very defined addition to the friend group. With more personality. A strong one. Lula, Julia and you shared a small apartment.

Julia cleared her throat.

“The fucking scarf,” Lula scowled.

“What scarf?” Matt asked. And you had the same question.

Julia whispered to her boyfriend’s ear who had turned cold. He lifted his head.

“But it’s not.”

“It is him,” Matt confirmed to Lula. “Jules, it is.”

And now your three friends were acting strange. Usually they did but this was strang-er. They all shared looks, Julia struggled with her hands.

They were watching you with pity but you’d gotten used to that. After the breakup they had been extra careful around you, kinder, you guessed.

Fools they were to believe that by not mentioning him you wouldn’t think of him. He was a memory that would haunt you for the rest of the days.

“So, y/n,” Julia was clearly hiding whatever Lula was seeing.

“Wasn’t he in London? What in this fucking world is he doing here?” Lula continued.

“Shut up!” Julia ordered.

“London?” You asked and you lifted your head, and any noise that was bustling before had stopped.

Tom.

Tom was there.

Thomas.

Tom who had broken your heart. In every possible way that he could’ve. Like he had planned it. Like he was aware.

He was there, on a stool with a beer in his hand and wearing a red scarf. The red scarf. As if he was mocking you.

Tom.

Did he pride on hurting you?

He had always said you were invincible. That you were unrivaled in matters of the heart. Was he proud he had beaten the unbeaten?

You’d always thought he would.

When we love deeply, getting hurt comes as a given. But when we love deeply, we are never expecting it to come. And when it does come the skies cannot turn grayer. Funny thing, you were a fan of the rain but when the rain doesn’t cease, the hope doesn’t perdure.

But he was back in your life. Or at least he had been in the same room as you after months.

What was he doing back in New York with your scarf?

You turned back to your own table, breathing in quickly, bringing your hand to your chest in an attempt to calm yourself down.

You saw your friends speaking but you couldn’t make a word of what they’re saying. Your heart was rushing. Thomas was there. Tom. Your Tom. And there was a part of you that had completely forgotten over the heartbreak and wanted to run to him.

Kiss him, try to fix it. Try to bring back the beautiful thing you both had. Because it was. And it hurt looking back.

You were having trouble breathing now, the heartbreak had come.

That’s the worst thing about heartbreak. You never saw it coming, though you should’ve. Though it was beautiful you’d known from the start you’d end up hurt. But when a lie is crafted so beautifully, how could you?

“It’s him.” The words had come in whispers.

You barely remembered what had happened next. You had only stood up, decisive to leave, you’d seen him try to walk his way to you. You’d heard him call your name, but you hadn’t turned back, you had seen Matty stop him from running to you.

It was blurry. You didn’t know how you got home. Desperately trying to understand why he was there and how the night had turned too badly.

Lula and Matt had come back later to find Julia trying to comfort you, hugging a pillow that you were sure he had slept on. Breathless.

But it was in the past now, you were there again. Same bar, both in stools far away.

You were almost sure he’d gone to that bar in hopes of finding you again.

Just like you’d gone again.

His eyes the night before were guilty. You only took a deep breath, you remembered trying to avoid his glance at any chance as you had walked out.

Why were you there again?

That feeling in your chest growing, like there was something heavy expanding. Yet your stomach falling smaller. The pain was but a shield, as if it was creating a special protection around your heart, and though it hurt it was enough for it to make your heart strong to leave the place.

You didn’t want to see Tom. You hadn’t talked to him since. Even when he’d tried to call. Even when you’d tried calling.

Not when you had replayed the breakup over and over and over again since he was gone.

Everyone deals with breakups in different ways. Yours, specifically, was avoiding it. Everything and everyone. Especially Tom.

It was hard when he was everywhere. In that tattoo he’d convinced you to get, in that ring he’d left, in that cereal box that you still hadn’t finished. Whenever you listened to a song he’d recommended. Whenever you’d open Netflix and that series you had started watching together was still recommended to you even when you’d deleted it.

Everywhere.

You couldn’t use your favorite colors because you could hear it, in the back of your head “I love how it looks on you.” “You should wear more blue, it suits you.”

Even your stupid laugh remind you of him. “Your laugh is the most wonderful thing I’ve heard, even if it’s so ugly.”

You missed the person you were when he was with you. How everything was happy. Who was that y/n? Who didn’t mind if she was slightly late to a place because he’d come with you? Who didn’t feel alone at parties when she knew nobody because you knew him?

A y/n that existed only for a short period of time when he’d been around and that he’d shattered like glass when he had the chance.

You missed that y/n.

The y/n that would sometimes lose her breath and catch it back when he walked into the room. A y/n that sang along to her favorite songs all day. The one that would give her heart in a rush to him. The one that watched movies no matter if they were good or not.

Life had colors back then.

Now you were full of regrets and of doubts. Wondering what you had done wrong? Where did it lead you?

You looked up at him then. He was staring down at his glass.

There was a slight trace of him still there, the Tom you once loved. The one with the silly smile and the gentle chuckle, the one with the jokes about everything.

You wondered how much of that y/n he saw too.

You were the same two people, in essence. But how different you were now.

The Tom you knew before finding out it was a lie.

There was still a hint. You knew. But there was so much of him in you that it was hard to see if you still were there. Or the Tom you thought you knew. Not the one with the lie. Or maybe this was the truest Tom he could ever be.

He had to move on, rather quickly, you recalled. If he ever did.

There was a stupid reminder of you in his hand, that red scarf from the very first day.

You still remembered how it all started, a stupid red scarf. He kept it, then, and he wore it.

You had ordered a beer, too. You pocketed the cap again.

But there was an image in your mind, maybe he had gone back and probably had his arm around her and he laughed at a joke she made. Maybe she was funnier than you. Definitely prettier, with her hair falling down all the way to her waist, her clothing accentuating everything you didn’t have.

You recalled having to leave the room when you found out. You had been a mess.

Leaning against a wall as you caught your breath before the tears came down, as if he had pierced right through it. A pain chest that had expanded all the way on your body, not sure how you were able to keep walking back to your place. Falling down to your knees when you did.

Pain. Words failed to describe such a deep sentiment.

But it was gone now. Not entirely but at least you could hold your breath fine when he was just across the room.

What went wrong?

You could ask him. He was right there.

Maybe even tell him how you had lost sight. He hadn’t walked up to you. He was nervous, but he seemed calm enough to see you were there. You were still unsure why you had gone there.

Maybe all the good things were enough to bring you there, maybe the fact that you still didn’t believe it was a lie brought you there. Maybe the fact that one of those pictures from that photobooth was still in a locket. So stupid.

He fiddled with the glass.

You waited and waited but he didn’t approach you. He took out a paper out of his pocket as he stared at it.

You wouldn’t approach him. No matter how happy he had made you once, you wouldn’t walk to him. No matter how beautiful it was. No matter if you were lonely and that when you dared to sleep he’d be haunting your dreams.

It was a tragedy now. What you both were, and not even worth enough to try and save it. You knew you were haunting him too. Otherwise he wouldn’t be here.

He was shakin, as he stared at you, nervous. He downed his drink, you guessed it was for some liquid courage and stood up, with the note in one hand and your red scarf in the other.

Your own courage for coming here was gone, as you saw his intentions, the urge to run you had the night before was becoming you. But he couldn’t walk. He had to sit down again, rubbing his face.

The courage that had come when choosing what Lula called the ‘revenge black dress’ was nowhere in sight. You were cold and regretting putting it on.

“I can’t do this,” you said to yourself and quickly let out some dollars to pay for your drink before picking up your stuff to leave.

You saw he panicked when he saw you leaving, he quickly called the bartender to pay for his drink.

You closed your coat as you were shaking yourself, punishing yourself for going there. Why had you gone there? The man had broken your heart? Were you really there to see him?

Was your heart foolish enough to ignore the warnings in your mind once again?

You walked your way to get to the subway station, how irrelevant you were through the crowds. You hadn’t felt this way for a while, caring for the crowds. But you had to get through them. There was a part of you that wished Tom was following you after. But the crowds didn’t let you see if he was.

Besides, you shouldn’t want that.

You finally managed to get to the station, you clung to your purse as you stared at the tracks, waiting for the next train to come. Peaceful it seemed, the station. As peaceful as New York could be. You guessed if you cried nobody would care.

“y/n!” You heard your name in the distance and you couldn’t handle it.

You took a deep breath and shook your head, angrily. Why had you gone? You could’ve easily kept ignoring his calls. You could’ve stayed in your apartment, crying as you watched SNL videos on youtube, or rewatching a cartoon for the hundredth time, letting your own sadness and self pity swallow you.

But you had gone to him. This was your fault. You should’ve taken a cab, instead, he would know you’d get at this station and he for sure would know what train you’d take.

“y/n, y/n!” He kept calling as he finally arrived next to you. “Sorry I would’ve gotten here faster but the damn MetroCard-”

“I’m not doing this, Tom,” you stated before he could go on rambling like the idiot he was. You couldn’t do it. “Not here, not anywhere. I don’t know what you’re doing here.”

“I…” His face was kind, and he seemed to be nervous. You could tell he hadn’t been sleeping, probably the jet lag.

You took a moment to look at him, he didn’t look as victorious as you had thought he was. His hair was messy, and his cheeks flushed, the buttons on his shirt were not buttoned right.

Seeing him again, with that signature look he had made you want to go down to your knees.

“Aren’t you supposed to be back in London?” You snapped. “With that pretty girl-”

“No, no, I’m-I’m sorry, I’m really sorry,” Tom stuttered. “I was an idiot.”

You stared into his eyes, you were not ready for this. You were not ready to look into his stupid eyes. You looked away. “That’s all you have to say?” You tried walking away from him..

He shook his head. “No, no, no, no, I… No, I actually… I had this… I wrote down my apology,” Tom confessed. He showed you a sad, handwritten paper, now slightly teared up with the ink running. “I… I had….”

You looked down at it, his messy handwriting, crinkled with words scratched down. “You wrote it down?”

You didn’t know why you felt your heart warm. This kind of stuff was why you couldn’t understand what had happened. Someone like him, who writes his apologies down. Someone who stutters when he’s speaking.

“Yeah, I… but I spilled my drink on it after seeing you fled,” He explained, swallowing hard. “I… I… I had written it down so I wouldn’t forget it but now I realize how stupid that is… I’m… I’m really sorry, y/n.” .

You could hear the train coming. You were seeing him again. It hit you right there. And this was not the reaction you thought. You had said you would be delusional, crying and fighting and questioning him why the fuck he had done that.

Yet you weren’t. You were only watching him, eyes full of tears wanting to slide down but unable to. But there was that pain still in your chest.

How could he ever dare to hurt you that way? “I don’t want to talk to you,” you said. And meant it. “Please leave me alone.” You said before walking into the train.

“Y/N, please, no, please, please, listen to me,” He followed you in, the scarf still in his hand.

You tried sitting as far away as you could. Arms and legs crossed as you tried breathing in.

He sat beside you and you changed seats. He sighed but followed you again. “Please, I need to talk to you. I never meant to hurt you.”

“Well you did,” you snapped. “You did, and now you come here a month later with a handwritten note apology thinking I will be fine with it?”

He pinched the bridge of his nose. “I had to solve-Please, would you listen?” Tom asked, knowing damn well he had to ask, and not just straight up blurt it out.

“Why would I, Tom?” You turned to him, with a tear traveling down your cheek. You were incredulous. “You’re kidding me, right? I… You… You think that just because you show up with that stupid face of yours and my scarf I’ll want to listen to you? You’re an idiot.”

He sighed and reached to give you the scarf. You ignored it.You were furious now.

The other people on the train were certainly getting a show. A guy with a backpack was trying to pretend he wasn’t listening but his reactions were giving it away. Another woman pretended to keep reading her book but she hadn’t turned any pages.

Tom took the scarf back staring at it. “I need to explain everything to you.”

“What if I don’t want an explanation?” You snapped. Though you did. You had been waiting for one, you wanted one. You would beg for it. But your pride was taking the wheel of the conversation. “Don’t you think it’s fucking late for it?”

“Is it?” Tom turned back to you.

“Yes!” You couldn’t believe him. But this seemed a bit too familiar of a conversation. “And beside no explanation would make me forgive you!” You stated, whispering, not wanting any of the attention you were receiving.

“I’m not… I… If you just listen to me,” Tom said.

You glared, “I don’t want anything to do with you.”

“Then why did you come to the bar?” He asked.

He fucking asked.

Your eyes widened. He had gone there. He knew. He fucking knew you’d gone back because you wanted an explanation. Or so he thought. No, you’d gone back because… Yes, because you wanted an explanation. Because everything he’d done had been beautiful. Until the heartbreak. He had crafted and vexed his way into your cold stupid heart and then he had gone and pierced right through it, crushed it.

You wanted to ask why. Why did he do it so vehemently?

You didn’t answer, instead you moved one seat away. He kept his eyes on you.

“You wouldn’t have gone if you didn’t want an explanation,” he said. “Or to see me, at least. I know I did, I needed to see you.”

You saw the guy with the backpack purse his lips, knowing that Tom had got you. There was little context for them. The girl with the book directed a glance to you, trying to read your emotions.

If they knew, they’d be on your side and yelling at him as well.

He rested his elbows on his knees and rubbed his face.

“I didn’t, it was a coincidence,” you answered coldly.

“No, it bloody wasn’t,” Tom scoffed and then sat up. “No, I’m… No, but you know, you went to the bar for a reason.”

“And I left for a million more,” you frowned.

Tom pursed his lips and took out the paper again, trying to make out whatever he’d written before. “I’m really sorry.” His eyes traced through the note.

“Are you genuinely trying to read it? Don’t you know what you’re supposed to apologize for?”

Tom looked up, “So you do want me to apologize?”

The guy with the backpack squeezed his eyes shut, knowing Tom had fucked up.

“You’re kidding, right? Yes, you have to apologize, what you did is really, really shitty!” You pointed out.

“But you won’t forgive me, then?” Tom watched you.

“I don’t know,” you said and he looked up, a beaming gaze. “No, I won’t.”

He wrinkled his eyes, “I… I know I’m supposed to apologize, not to expect you to forgive. I'm just…”

He gulped, and then sat back, staring at the dirty walls and lights. He had dressed up. Badly, but he had tried looking good, you could tell. You could smell his lotion, too.

He was fiddling with the paper, crumpling up and then it fell to the floor. You looked at it and somehow related to it, not sure how.

You took a deep breath so you wouldn’t kill him and turned to him. “I have questions for you, if you answer them I might consider listening to you.”

Tom’s eyes brightened up. “Yes, yes, anything.”

You eyed him up and down as he watched you with begging eyes. You avoided his gaze. Tom followed your gaze as you tried to figure out what was the first thing you could ask him. Why had he hurt you?

Why did he not stop and think before making you fall in love with him?

Why did he not stop and tell you the truth?

“Where are you staying?” You asked,

Tom blinked. “Is that… is that the question?”

“No, but I know you don’t know how to fucking get anywhere,” you said.

Tom gulped, “I… uh, again with Harrison,” he explained.

You sighed. You remembered Harrison alright. And though there was a petty part inside you, you would help him out. Knowing he’d always get lost in the city. Though you could let him get lost, so you’d have to go after him and spend a bit more time. With an excuse, because you didn’t seem to have any excuse to be with him.

It hurt. What hurt the most was trying not to look back at the incredible moments you had because none of them were true.

You sighed. “Okay, when we get down you’ll take the F train—“

Tom stopped you, taking your hand. “No, wait, I don’t care if I get lost, okay, I… I just.”

You snatched your hand away from his cold hands he had. You darkened your gaze at him.

“Please, Y/n, I just need a chance. If you don’t want to listen… maybe I’ll just…” He handed you the note.

You crossed your arms, and tapped your foot, trying to decide whether or not to give it to him. “Fine,” you took the note.

You've gotten to your stop. So you stood up.

The girl with the book and the guy with the backpack watched you both as you walked out, pitying they couldn’t follow the drama.

Tom followed after you, he licked his lips. “You… you had questions, right?”

“Yeah.” You nodded, taking yet another heavy breath. You turned on your feet to look at him “One, did you lie to me?”

Tom was taken back by this, his eyes, consternated, only watched you. He gulped. “What?”

“Did you lie to me?

“I… well.”

You were getting desperate. “Did you ?”

“I didn’t lie about how I felt,” he said. You knew he wasn’t lying about it. He couldn’t. He couldn’t have ever lied about how he felt because you knew he had felt it too, a bit, at least,

You rolled your eyes, “Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, whatever.”

“I mean it, I…” Tom gulped. “I really liked you.”

“Yeah, I know, you liked me yadda, yadda,” you started. Liked not loved. “Cut the bullshit for once, did you or did you not lie to me?”

Tom took a deep breath. “Yes. But I had feelings for you.”

You bit your inner cheeks. “Uh-huh, yes, okay, good, yes, you acknowledge it. So, we have two statements here, Tom. You say you had feelings yet you lied to me,” you squinted. “Sounds-”

Tom gulped and avoided your gaze. “I know yes,” he looked down. “But, if you give me-”

“Ah, buh-buh, nope, I’m just gathering my thoughts here,” you coughed. “I need you to look me in the eyes and tell me what you felt.”

Tom shook his head in confusion. “I—I’m”

“Go on,” you motioned your hand.

“Y/N,” he said. And the way he dared to say your name was like having a knife right through you. “I had—I have feelings for you,” he said looking right into your eyes.

He didn’t say what feelings.

You were not sure where you wanted to go with this. “Fine, my next question…” you really didn’t know where this was going. “So, alright, you…” You couldn’t even phrase it. “You… made me fall in love with you knowing….Well, we both know what you did. What you hid from me. You’re a liar who made me—“

Tom took a deep breath. “Yes, but I didn’t… plan that.”

Your eyes widened. “Oh, so it’s my fault?” You stepped back. “Sorry for developing feelings for you. Sorry for ruining your life—“

Tom closed his eyes, “No, no, look, I… wasn’t. I didn’t come here expecting to meet you, I didn’t want… It just happened, okay, I never thought—You're making it sound like it’s some big master plan. I—I never planned—I never would’ve ever planned on hurting you.”

You watched him, incredulous. “Thomas you do realize what you did to me?”

“I do.”

“No, you don’t! You’re trying to make me seem like I’m crazy for not even wanting to talk to you!” You called him out.

“I’m not, I’m just saying that if you’re here—you must miss it too, you know it was too real, and you want it back, possibly—M-maybe not, but if you came to the bar tonight it was in hopes of finding me again because you knew I’d be there, and you want to feel how you felt before, and i just… you know I miss it and that you knew I didn’t lie—“

You glared at him. “You did lie!”

“Okay—yes, yes I did—But not entirely, I just happened to omit one truth—“

“One very important truth,” you snarked.

“Fine but—please listen,” he tried to convince you. “and I’m sorry, okay? I—I didn’t want to hurt you. But I never planned this. It just happened. I didn’t come here expecting to fall in love with anyone, I didn’t come here trying to date, and I never expected it to be someone as complex—“

“Complex?”

“Yes, I never came to New York trying to find the most mental relationship I’ve ever had—“

“Mental?” You snapped.

“Yes! I love you but you’re fucking crazy! And I am too! I’m fucking crazy and mental but I—I—I loved being crazy and mental with you! We are fucking mental! Driving to nowhere? Breaking into places? Getting a jukebox on the subway? That’s mental! But—but I love that about you, alright? Don’t you get it? I could’ve stayed in London, I could've been the asshole who just ditched you and lied to you—“

You scoffed. “Well that’s comforting!”

“But I’m—I’m here, ain’t I? And I know I fucked up, I know, I accept that, I’m the asshole here, and I know you’ll never—I hid it from you because I didn’t know what was going on, I didn’t even get it myself. I’m here to give you my version of it. I didn’t realize I was falling in love with you…I am…,I am in love with you, and I never planned that, I wasn’t supposed to fall in love with someone else, it just happened. I may have thought it was just—Some fling, initially.”

You laughed cynically. “A fling.”

He gulped. “And the moment I realized what was really going on—”

“You left, that’s what you fucking did, when you realized it was way too real for you, you destroyed the one real thing you’ve ever known,” you barked, he stepped back. “I fell in love with you, I—I—and then you ditched me, and I thought that was the worst thing you could ever do to me but then I realized that it wasn’t real! I—you were never mine, Tom! I simply was—a break you needed or—a fling.”

“It wasn’t that—“

You watched him. Looking so innocent, kind eyes and tender lips. You would’ve believed him had he come before.

“You used me!” You snapped, the words that had wanted to come for a while just blurted out. “I just can’t believe you,” you said. “You don’t feel sorry.” You shook your head, your voice was cracking. “You're not sorry because you don’t understand. You don’t know what I went through, and if you had come earlier, if you hadn’t left me, I probably would have believed you. But—No! No!” You stepped back. “No!”

“I did call! You never picked up the phone! I tried—“Tom started.

“Was I really expected to pick it up? Let’s get back to it. Shall we? The facts. Did you or did you not date me? And made me fall in love with you?”

Tom sighed. “I—yes.”

“Did you lie?”

“…yes.”

You nodded. “Was I the other one?”

Tom squinted his eyes. “No… yes, no.”

You took a deep breath. “Did you leave me without an explanation?”

Tom looked down. “I did.”

“Did you ditch me?”

Tom looked everywhere and nowhere. “Yes,” he answered, defeated.

“Now, do you think I can ever forgive you?”

Tom didn’t answer.

You reached for your purse, for the locket that dug deep inside. “I don’t know you,” you stated giving him the locket, the stupid locket you’d bought as a joke when making fun of other couples and now laughed in your face. “Whatever happened means nothing. Because that’s the thing Tom. Everything we lived was a lie, those two people in the locket are not us, because you weren’t who you said you were, no matter how much I loved it, it’s not true and though it was too many emotions all at once I’m—It’s not real, not for you. I spent this whole time thinking I wanted you to apologize but I don’t want it. That charming guy wasn’t truly you because you omitted one very important thing. You—What were you thinking? Were you planning to never say it? Or did you plan it like that? Just ditching me, hoping I wouldn’t find out—“

Tom took a deep breath. “No—No, I didn’t. I just—-I didn’t know what to do. I’m so sorry, I should’ve told you and I should’ve fixed it before—-“

“No, no you didn’t because it wasn’t enough for you.”

Tom gulped, “It was, it was—-the best thing I’ve ever had.”

“And you ruined it.”

“I’m sorry.”

“How little words mean when you’re a little too late, huh?” And that was the cue you needed to walk away. He silently watched you as you tried not to cry.

“I’m really sorry.” He said.

Was he?

“What if I try to prove it to you?” He asked as you were steps away from him.

You didn’t stop.

“If we go over this, you’ll see I never lied about it.” He continued.

“I already went over it, I remember everything, Tom, and maybe that’s why I don't want to talk to you.”

Tom walked behind, slowly. “I just happened to be very unlucky when it came to my own circumstances,” he reached over. “And I wish the timing had been better. But you’re right, it’s the one real thing I’ve ever had and I lost it because I hid something in fear of losing you. I lied because it was too good to be true. And I understand if you don’t want anything to do with me but I think you deserve to know why. But you went to the bar for a reason, and you had the locket for another.”

You stopped this time. Looking down at the floor and then at his hand, holding your stupid scarf. You shook your head, you really didn’t want to go through it all over again.

“I know you won’t forgive me,” he stated. “But I can’t let you go. You’re everywhere. And I miss the person I was when you were around, and I won’t stop fighting because you’re everywhere. Dreams, nightmares.”

Funny. You were his demons too.

“Am I haunting your nightmares?” You asked. Tom only watched you.

He took a deep breath. “I don’t expect you to forgive me, I just need—I really need you to listen to my version.”

“Fine then, let’s go down this sad, beautiful tragic love affair.”

next chapter

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nctyhoney · 4 years ago

Text

a helping hand (m)

Pairing: mark lee x fem!reader

Genre: smut, fluff, office worker!mark, friends to lovers, office!au

Word Count: 7.6k

Warnings: oral sex (male receiving), car sex, dry humping, praise kink

Playlist: pickled ginger - mac ayres, fill my holes - YESEO, wait for it - H.E.R.

Summary: You were used to workplace flirting. Everyone at some point would have a 'work bae'. Mark was different though, he was your intern. There were things you wanted to teach him, things he wanted to teach you and none of it had anything to do with work.

A/N: Mark in a suit is just too damn cute. This is my first fic on here so thank you for reading! There will be another part to this at some point.

—————————————————————————

It’s just gone 8 am and you're on your morning commute to work. You have a car but the traffic in Seoul made it almost impossible to drive during rush hour. Your eyes still feel puffy from sleep, and you hope your mascara has masked their appearance somewhat. As you and a mass of other office workers spill out of the subway station, you're greeted by an autumnal wind. Although it felt mild for the time of year, you couldn't get used to the early morning darkness that the promise of winter brought.

In just 2 years, you'd progressed to head of the marketing team at Hyphen, Korea's biggest publishing house. You were proud to have landed a job at such a reputable company straight out of university, but with each pay rise came more responsibilities.

The elevator reached your floor, 39. Going through to the kitchen area, you put two iced Americano cans in the refrigerator. You weren't a fan of coffee but it got you through the day. As you were organising the refrigerator, you felt someone behind you and turned around quickly - it was your manager. He had a weird way of creeping up on his workers and you found him somewhat seedy. You always made sure to be polite to him, though.

"Morning manager Kim," you stand up, adjusting your pencil skirt slightly.

"Morning y/n! Here bright and early I see. Did you get my email last night?" He asks, his eyes flicking between your body and your face.

"Sorry, what email?" You ask, feeling slightly panicked.

"This year's interns start today. I sent it last night so you probably didn't get a chance to read it."

Crap. Interns. You didn't know if it was your imposter syndrome talking but something about being observed by interns made you feel underqualified. Perhaps you just got a bad batch of interns the first time around. You remembered Kyungsoo and Minhee from last year. Kyungsoo's uncle was CEO of Hyphen and he wouldn't let you forget it. He refused to work and you'd find him and Minhee coming back from their lunch breaks an hour late, often out of the unused stock cupboard.

"No sorry I didn't read it," you apologise, "when are they coming?"

"The receptionist said there are four downstairs waiting. They'll be up in a minute," manager Kim says checking his watch.

You nod, "How many will I be working with this year?"

"You'll each have one intern this year. You'll be working with Mark Lee, he's Canadian. A good kid. I think you'll like him."

Just then, the sound of the elevator reaching the 39th floor alerted you. Four of the interns shuffled out of the elevator.

"Welcome to Hyphen, I'm manager Kim, you might remember me from your interview," he said looking between his sheet with their faces and names and up at them.

"So we have Mark, Haechan, Jeno and Sooji. I hope you enjoy this year working in marketing. This is y/n, she's head of this department."

You exchange handshakes and bobs of the head, feeling relieved that these interns at least look shy rather than cocky rich kids.

"Mark you'll be giving y/n a helping hand this year. Y/n, I know you'll make him feel welcome. The rest of you, let's find the workers you'll be shadowing," manager Kim says before they're off out of the kitchen to one of the conference rooms.

Mark is staring at you from a distance, awkward and tense. His black hair falls into his eyes despite styling it neatly for work; he brushes it out of his eye nervously.

"Tea?" you ask him, grabbing your two favourite mugs out of the cupboard.

"Oh, yeah, please - if that's not too much trouble," Mark says hesitantly.

"Of course it's not. You can sit down, we don't start work for another 20 minutes."

He does as he's told, opting for one of the chairs closest to the kitchen worktop.

"Do you take sugar?" You call over to him.

"Two," he replies, fiddling slightly with his wristwatch. This boy is endearing you think, definitely an upgrade from arrogant Kyungsoo.

"How are you feeling about interning here?" You ask, stirring his tea, before coming to sit at the chair next to his.

He takes the mug, "Oh, thank you. I'm kinda nervous I'm not gonna lie, but thankful to be here."

You laugh, his casual tone is refreshing but he catches on and apologizes quickly.

"There's no need to apologize, you can be informal with me. I don't want you to feel uncomfortable," you say, catching his eye over the rim of your mug. He's blushing slightly, and you wonder why you are too.

♡

It's been 3 months since the interns came. December comes and with it is an endless rain.

In those 3 months, it didn't take long for you and Mark to grow close. Sure, he still had his occasional shy tendencies but you spent all your working hours together. Rather than a forced relationship between a senior and their junior, this was something you both saw as natural.

You're just not sure if the feelings you've developed are natural, too. His eyes hold onto yours for longer at company dinners, his hands linger at your waist when he reaches to get a file from the shelf in front of you. And it sets something off in you. You crave the contact. Mark Lee is driving you crazy.

You certainly weren't imagining these moments. You were used to workplace flirting. Everyone at some point would have a 'work bae'. Mark was different though, he was your intern. There were things you wanted to teach him, things he wanted to teach you and none of it had anything to do with work.

When you first started at Hyphen, Johnny used to be heavy on the flirting with you, and being from America, he was confident with it. He’d make you cups of hot, sweet tea each morning. He gave you those flirtatious touches on your arms while complimenting you, and he’d always make sure you got home safe after a company dinner. But he also had a long-term girlfriend and you knew nothing could come of it. Johnny still flirts with you, but that’s just him. And when you first began working at the company, you fell for it...almost. It happened a second time, with Jaehyun but then you learnt that these were just the ways of the office.

Today was a Friday, which meant your division would have drinks with the manager. You weren't keen on drinking, especially not with your manager but your coworkers made it bearable. And since the CEO was attending this week, the manager wouldn't be bothering you, Yerin and Mina for the entire night.

You lean over Mark, reading through the document on his laptop. He's edited the press release you wrote for a new book launch.

He shifts around in his seat. You can't tell if he's nervous about you reading his work or nervous about being sat underneath you. You hope it’s the latter option, though.

"As expected from our Markie. You're really helping me by editing these documents, it's great - thanks," you smile, moving away slightly.

He's blushing a violent shade of pink and touching the back of his neck. He couldn't get any cuter.

"It's not fair that y/n gets such a helpful intern. Sooji left early when she promised to help with my reports, that's the second time this week," Mina huffs, folding her arms.

"It's compensation for the hell I went through with the interns last year," you laugh.

Johnny walks up to you and nudges you playfully.

"Nah it's not compensation. Y/n is just so hard-working, that's why they gave you the most hard-working intern," he says winking.

Mark looks between you and Johnny, an eyebrow raised.

"Yeah, thanks for that Johnny but that's definitely not true. Not the part about Mark not being hard-working...or me, I mean, I am hard-working, just not the most," you stutter, suddenly feeling foolish.

Luckily it hits 5 pm before anyone can dwell on your tongue-tied speech. You're all tidying away, turning off your monitors and getting ready for a night of drinking.

You catch eyes with Yerin and go to the bathroom to touch up your makeup.

You're reapplying a dab of lipstick and Yerin brushes her face lightly with powder. She stops for a moment, glancing at you.

"You don't still like Johnny do you?" Yerin asks.

"Johnny?! No way, I'm not going back there," you laugh.

"You seem nervous around him," Yerin points out.

"Come on Yerin, that was awkward. It's weird when someone hypes you up like that. It's bad enough being marketing lead now, it's like I'm expected to be some bigshot when I still feel like a uni student," you admit.

"Yeah, I understand, but you're totally capable. Could it be that you’re feeling shy around a handsome, new worker, I wonder?" Yerin winks.

"What do you mean?"

"Well, I've noticed that you've been spending a lot of time with Mark recently. I'm left to take lunch with Doyoung. I mean I'm not complaining but you know, Mark does look kinda smitten."

You look over at your friend and catch her looking back at you, expectantly.

"We have to look after our interns, Yerin. And it's not every day that you get such a hard-working one like Mark. Remember the hell I went through with Kyungsoo? Let's just say I'm relieved I've got a good worker."

"Right...so you don't think he's even a little bit cute?"

Hell yes, you did. But you couldn't admit that, could you?

"He's cute but like, in a little bro way. He's too goofy for me to see him romantically," you bluff but you know Yerin can see right through you.

"He's an intern, what's the harm? As long as Kim doesn't find out," Yerin says.

"Yerin! You're talking nonsense."

"I've seen the way you look at him. And the way he looks at you," she laughs.

"The way he looks at me?" You blurt out, "The way I look at him? We're just good coworkers."

"Girl, you're such a bad liar."

♡

Yerin's words stay in your head for the entire night. Suddenly you're thinking about what Mark's lips would feel like against yours. Wondering what it would feel like for him to touch you, more than the light touches in the office. You've thought about it before, of course. But mostly while touching yourself in bed.

Mark is sat at the low table opposite you, Yerin and Mina at either side of you. Mark is laughing, taking a shot of soju as Johnny pats him on the back. He clearly can't handle his alcohol because he's giggling like a school kid and his face is already flushed. He looks stupidly cute and you realize how much you want to hold him, feel his flushed cheeks underneath your palms. But you peel your eyes away, tuning in to a conversation Yuta and Mina are having about Christmas holidays in Japan.

Manager Kim announces that him and the CEO will be moving to drink somewhere else, stumbling from the long table and telling you to enjoy your night. You all know where that 'somewhere else' is, but you don't bother questioning it. Corporate culture can be parasitic.

Even so, you're relieved that they've left, the atmosphere less stuffy now. Things feel playful and flirtatious. Jaemin is whispering in Jeno's ear and Jeno is laughing. Yerin's hand is dangerously placed on Doyoung's thigh.

You can't snatch glances at Mark anymore because he's looking right at you, his eyes filled with something you haven't seen before..lust? Maybe your tipsiness is altering the situation but you like it.

“Shall we play truth or dare?” Lucas grins, clapping his hands.

“Let’s just do truths, we’re in public,” Jaehyun points out.

“I second that! But this stays between us, company oath,” Mina says, taking an empty soju bottle and spinning it on the table.

The bottle lands on Jungwoo first and Jaehyun and Mark nudge him on either side, laughing.

“Jungwoo! Who would you date out of everyone here?” Mina asks.

Jungwoo’s eyes are playful and he throws his head back laughing.

“You want me to be completely honest? I’d probably say Lucas,” he says without hesitating.

Everyone is laughing and teasing the pair, except for Mina who nudges Lucas in the ribs to stop him from smirking.

“Moving on, where is the riskiest place you’ve ever had sex?” Jaehyun asks, spinning the bottle as it lands on Mark.

Mark rubs at his nose, looking at you momentarily. You pretend to focus on your soju shot but you’re listening carefully.

“I mean…a car I guess?” Mark chuckles, he’s bright red now and you feel jealousy rising inside of you.

Why were you jealous? He wasn’t even your boyfriend.

Johnny is ruffling his hair but Mark looks up at you, looking slightly shifty. Maybe you understand how Mina feels now. You can’t look at him.

“Okay, moving on,” Mark says taking the bottle, “Do you like anyone here?”

It lands on Jaemin and he reclines back in his seat. He raises an eyebrow, “Sure, they like me too.”

Everyone laughs at that and Jeno just shakes his head cutely, everyone knowing they’re practically an item at this point.

“Who would you make out with right now if we were doing dares?” Jaemin asks.

The bottle lands on Johnny. It’s Mark’s turn to pat Johnny on the back now and Johnny just smiles to himself.

“Aren’t you gonna answer, Johnny?” Yuta laughs.

“I’d make out with y/n” Johnny shrugs.

There are collective gasps, and you can feel everyone’s eyes on you. That wasn’t what he was supposed to answer, surely? He had a girlfriend; he could’ve passed on the answer. You look up at Johnny and as if reading your thoughts, he shrugs.

“I had to answer,” he says, putting his hands up defensively.

You laugh then, typical Johnny.

There’s a playful glint in Mark’s eye. Was he that unaffected? You suddenly felt annoyed, foolish for feeling jealous about Mark’s confession.

“If you could have a threesome with two people here, who would they be?” Johnny asks.

It lands on Yerin then, who is already flushed with embarrassment at the question.

“Doyoung, and hmm..” she pauses looking around, “Probably y/n, because we’ve seen each other naked.”

“What?!” Mark, Lucas and Jaehyun say simultaneously. Mark just about chokes on his soju.

“Calm down Mark, looks like someone’s getting a bit turned on,” Yuta winks but Mark’s eyes are still wide, shocked by Yerin’s statement.

Yerin was your best friend, all best friends had seen each other naked. It was perfectly normal. At least it was for you two.

“It’s a girl thing,” Yerin says simply, taking another shot.

“Oh! I have a good one,” Yuta says grabbing the bottle, “Have you masturbated thinking about anyone around this table?”

Of course it lands on you. To be honest, you had touched yourself thinking about 3 separate people at the table but no one needed to know that. Everyone’s silent and you don’t know where to look. You could lie, it would save your reputation but where would the fun be in that? You were all as tipsy as each other. So you reply with a small “yes” instead.

“Who was it?” Jaehyun asks.

“I’m not gonna answer that,” you laugh.

You try not to blush but you can’t help it and cover your face with your hands momentarily.

“She’s thinking about them again!” Yerin nudges your shoulder.

You didn’t want to look, you didn’t want to see if Mark was staring at you so you take the bottle to ask the next question quickly.

“How many people have you slept with in total?” you ask, spinning again.

It lands on Doyoung, his eyes are wide and he looks confused, you can’t help but laugh at his cute expression.

Yerin is smirking, expectant.

“Hmm...maybe fifteen?” Doyoung says, tilting his head.

“Fifteen! No way,” Johnny laughs but Doyoung just nods.

“You said you wanted the truth.”

Yerin looks slightly pissed as she pours another shot of soju. It’s only when Doyoung whispers in her ear that her frown softens into a slight smile. She’s got it bad, you thought.

“Let’s stop the game now, I don’t want to hear all these details,” Mina says, side-eyeing Lucas.

“Yeah I didn’t even get picked,” Haechan huffs, “Let’s just drink a bit more!”

"Hey," Yerin murmurs in your ear over the noise a few moments later, "I'm going home with Doyoung, I'll see you on Monday."

"You naughty girl! Have fun," you laugh. She blows you a flirtatious kiss as she leaves, her arm in Doyoung's.

It's gone midnight when you and your remaining coworkers spill out onto the street.

"To the next bar, let's go!" Haechan shouts, stumbling as Johnny props him up.

"Dude, you've had way too much to drink. I'm getting you in a taxi," Johnny says.

Sooji and Jaehyun also opt for getting taxis, following Johnny down the street.

"Are you coming y/n? Mark?" Jaehyun calls.

"I think I'm going to get some food first, I'll see you guys on Monday," you say before you realize. You're not even hungry.

"Yeah me too, see you later!" Mark waves.

You say your goodbyes, leaving you and Mark to walk the opposite way. Mark follows your step, but he's taking his tie off, undoing his top button because he's hot from drinking even though it's the middle of December. The sight of him makes your stomach flip.

"You don't think they'll suspect anything, about you coming home with me?" you ask suddenly.

Mark raises an eyebrow and looks at you, "Who said I'm coming home with you? I thought you wanted food."

"Yeah...yeah, just they might think something else."

Mark shrugs, "Do you care what they think?"

"No, and I guess everyone's fucking each other anyway," you say emphatically.

"Exactly. Everyone in the office knows we're friends, let them think what they want," Mark says.

"I guess you're right."

"So where are we going?"

"McDonald's?" you ask.

"I don't really feel like food, to be honest," Mark chuckles.

You turn to Mark, "You're seriously just gonna watch me eat?"

He shrugs, "Why not?"

His eyes are glazed over and shiny from the alcohol, his lips formed into a little pout. It takes everything in you not to kiss him right there and then on the street.

"You're so weird when you're drunk," you say instead, "Seriously, where do you want to go? If you're not going to eat, we might as well go home. I mean...you go to yours and I go to mine."

Mark pulls at his ear, thinking for a moment. But it doesn't really look like he's thinking, more like pretending to think. You can see the trace of a smirk hiding on his lips. This whole conversation feels weirdly contrived. You want him and you're pretty sure he feels the same way.

"I could come with you? Just, you know, to make sure you get home safe," Mark blurts out.

You can't take it anymore. You want Mark Lee so bad it hurts. "Right, okay...well, shall we go now?"

Mark nods and you haul a taxi, just as it starts raining.

♡

Mark is stood in your bedroom doorway, looking as awkward as when you first met him. Now you're not so sure if it was a good idea to invite him in.

"I'll sleep on the sofa if you want," he insists but both of you know it means nothing.

You laugh, "Mark, you can sleep in my bed, it's alright. You can sleep on the left side, I'll sleep on the right if you want."

He smiles in response but doesn't move.

"Seriously Mark, I'm not going to bite," you say patting at the bed.

He sits down gingerly then.

"Your apartment is decorated so nicely," he says looking around your room.

You can see the moon outside of your window, already on its descent for another night.

When you turn back to look at Mark, his eyes are on you. You don't know what to say, but you know what you want to do.

"Can I kiss you ?" he asks, confirming your thoughts. He looks down at your lips and back up to your eyes again.

You nod your head, you can't talk but it doesn't matter because Mark is already leaning in and then his lips are moving against yours. His lips taste faintly of soju, but you don't care. You want to taste him and you slide your tongue against his, suddenly feeling desperate. He takes the hint because you're both taking off each other's clothes then until you're both just in your underwear.

"Wait," Mark says, his hands faltering, "Do you think we should be doing this?"

It's dark, only a street lamp and the moon partially illuminating the room. The raindrops are highlighted and cling to the windowpane. You feel melancholic and you realize now more than ever that you want to be held by Mark. You can make out Mark's expression, a mix of flustered and horny rolled into one. You know he wants this too, this dorky, shy intern who was barely able to make eye contact with you is now in your bed.

"Why not? There's nothing wrong with what we're doing."

That's all the confirmation he needs because he starts to plant kisses on your neck. You stroke his hair as he makes his way down to your boobs.

"You're so hot" he murmurs, taking off your bra.

He nuzzles his face into your chest, breathing heavily before taking one of your boobs in his mouth. He swirls his tongue around your nipple first and then sucks again. His tongue feels warm and wet against your skin. He looks up at you, his eyes wide and needy.

"God that feels so good - keep doing that," you breathe.

He hums in response against your boob and you shiver. You want to keep hearing him, that voice that you've dreamt about for nights on end.

Mark lifts you to sit on his lap and you can feel his hardness pressing against you.You guide Mark's head back up to meet yours and you're both kissing again. You grind down on him, both knowing you need this. You want to feel him against you and you can't control it. Your movements are instinctual. Mark understands because he's bucking his hips up to meet yours, despite still having his boxers on. You can hear him grunt into the kiss.

"Do you have a condom?" you sigh.

"Shit, no."

You break apart briefly, Mark's eyes are hooded and his lips are swollen. You're almost certain that you look the same.

"It's okay," you say, getting off his lap to sit next to him.

"Wait - what are you doing then?" he asks, a trace of disappointment in his voice.

"What does it look like I'm doing," you say, pushing him lightly so he's lying down on the bed.

You pull off his trousers and he helps by kicking them at the ankles. He's eager now, his eyes hungry.

You pull down his boxers next until he's lying there, his beautiful, fully naked body exposed. You can see the shadowed contours of his lean body, the smoothness of his skin.

You kiss on his thighs, his skin is so soft and you hear his breath hitch as you do it. He's completely turned on now, you're satisfied knowing you've done this to him. So satisfied that you begin rubbing your clit in slow motions as your face hovers over Mark's crotch.

You take his dick with your free hand and pump it in your hand a couple of times. The tip is wet already and you kiss it, the precum on your lips. He whimpers then and you circle your clit quicker, feeling yourself growing wetter. As you lick Mark's tip, his hips raise to meet your mouth.

"I can't show my face when I'm like this," he murmurs, putting your bed pillow over his face.

"No, I want to see you," you say, climbing up to take the pillow.

Mark just turns his face to the side in response, too horny to argue.

You take him fully in your mouth, bobbing up and down slowly before finding a steady rhythm. He groans in time to your sucking motion.

"Fuck y/n, I'm gonna cum soon," he moans.

You hum against his dick, "You taste so good, Markie. Please cum for me."

He holds your head, pushing it down to reach his raised hips and you can feel yourself choking as his tip touches the back of your throat.

"I'm so...close, fuck" he moans, thrusting into your mouth.

He whimpers and wriggles beneath you, before jerking violently in large strokes as he cums in your mouth.

You swallow it up, but continue sucking, feeling yourself reach your own climax.

"Shit," Mark hisses.

"Oh my god, Mark -" you cry as you orgasm, your center pulsating.

You come to lie next to Mark, kissing him, open-mouthed and hungry. He can taste himself on you and he likes it.

"You were so damn good at that, y/n," Mark whispers.

"You were so good," you mirror, taking his now sweaty cheek in your hand.

"But I didn't get to do anything," Mark mumbles, placing soft, small kisses on your face.

"I came too. It was so hot seeing you like that."

"No seriously - I wanna make you cum, like for real though," he murmurs into your hair.

"Mm?"

"I know you're sleepy now but would you let me some other time?" he says in the darkness.

Mark's dark hair is plastered to his forehead now. He's hot and flushed, it makes your heart want to burst.

"Do you want to see me again? Like...outside of work I mean," you ask, brushing the hair from his eyes to look at him.

He nods, "What are you doing tomorrow?"

"Nothing, are you asking me out?" you giggle, pinching his cheek a little then.

He smiles and you know he's blushing.

"I guess you could say that, yeah," he laughs.

"I'm free then," you say, giving him a small peck on his lips.

Mark pulls you in for a hug. It seems like he wants to say something, whisper to you but you find yourself drifting in and out of sleep quickly. The sound of rain mixes with Mark's rhythmic breathing and lulls you to sleep.

♡

Mark had told you to wait on a nearby street by Apgujeong station. So you're surprised when he pulls up in front of you in his car. It's an old model, just about affordable for a student but it suits him well.

"I never knew you had a car," you point out, climbing into the passenger seat.

"What can I say, I'm a man full of surprises," he winks, laughing because he knew that was as cheesy as it sounded.

"Is where we're going a surprise too?" you ask.

"It might be," he says tapping at the steering wheel with his thumb to the beat of the music. It's a Lucky Daye song.

"You look so pretty by the way," he says, rubbing his nose slightly. You can tell he does that when he's shy.

"You don't look bad yourself," you reply. That would be an understatement, Mark looks like a full course meal right now. Skimming your eyes over his casual clothes, you remember that this was the first time you were meeting Mark outside of work.

You feel good. Despite how cold the late morning feels, the low winter sun is shining, the sky a soft blue.

"Where are you taking me?" you ask when you eventually realize that you're leaving Seoul.

Mark just taps his nose and tells you it won't be a long journey.

And he's right, in the next half an hour, you're driving on Incheon bridge, next to a stretch of blue sea.

♡

It turns out that Mark brought you to Incheon to eat.

You're sat on the floor at a low table of a seafood restaurant. Both of you know how good Incheon seafood is. There's what seems like a hundred different side dishes on the table, and despite both being big eaters, you're not sure if you'll be able to clear even half of it.

"Have the spicy seafood stew, it's delicious," Mark says, pouring you a bowl and putting it in front of you.

You take a mouthful and he's right, it is delicious. It’s warm and spicy, exactly what you need on a cold day. Mark is looking at you intently, his eyes shining like an eager puppy. He seems happy to see you enjoying your food and that warms your heart. You want to kiss him again.

“The stew is really good for a hangover too, it’s probably what you need,” he says, smiling.

“Hangover? I’m not hungover, do I look it?” You say self-consciously.

“No, no, I just meant we both drunk quite a lot last night,” he says, laughing nervously.

You blush remembering last night and then your thoughts flick back to truth or dare, and how jealous you were.

Mark must be thinking about it too. "Have you dated any of the guys at Hyphen?" he asks.

You just about choke on your stew, "No, why do you ask that?"

Mark shrugs, "I just wondered. They all speak really well of you, especially Johnny. And you're pretty, why wouldn't they want to date you?"

You laugh then, "Do they?"

Mark frowns a little, "You don't like Johnny, do you?"

"God no, we barely interact these days. No, I haven't dated any of them."

"Did you interact a lot before?" Mark asks.

"Me and Johnny? No, has Johnny said something?"

"Nah, apart from saying he’d date you last night. He just looks like he likes you," Mark says, rubbing his cheek.

You laugh a little then, "No, Johnny has a girlfriend and I wouldn't date him now even if he didn't have one."

Mark relaxes a little then.

"Is there a rule about dating coworkers then or do you just decide not to do it?"

"There's no rule, people just like to keep their personal and work lives private and often separate," you point out.

Mark thinks for a moment, toying with the noodles on his plate.

"What do you like to do, keep things private?" he asks.

"Private or public, I don't care, they can choose," you say quietly.

"Okay...that's good then," Mark says, smirking slightly.

He always has a roundabout way of saying things.

♡

It's 5 pm when the wintry sun sets in Incheon. You and Mark are walking along the beach. It's not perfect weather for it, since it's cold and you shiver in your coat but you're happy to be here with him.

"You need to dress warmer, y/n!" Mark says as he turns to you to retie your scarf properly.

He rubs his hands over your arms to warm you up.

"I'm okay - feel," you say, reaching your hand up to his cheek.

Mark searches your eyes and so it doesn't come as a surprise when he leans in and kisses you. His lips are warm and soft against yours and you feel as though you're melting. The kiss is a light, sweet one and you have to break apart because you feel giddy.

"Sorry, I couldn't help myself," he says.

"No, I like it."

You look into the fading light and see figures at the busy part of the beach in the distance. It wouldn't matter if you were publicly affectionate, no one would care. But you know if you start kissing him again, you won't want to stop.

You hear the sea breeze and then the first rainfall before you see it. It's soft and gentle but you know if you stand here for much longer that you'll catch a cold.

"Shall I take you home?" Mark asks.

You nod, feeling dazed and slightly lightheaded.

As you get into the car, Mark puts his Spotify on. 'Wait for it' by H.E.R. is first to play.

You peer over at his phone screen, it reads 'sex playlist'.

"There's no way you have a sex playlist," you laugh, pushing his arm playfully.

"Nah, it's just random," Mark bluffs, rubbing his nose in the cute way that he did.

"Well, whoever created this playlist has good taste."

"Yeah, alright, it is mine. But it doesn't mean anything," he says.

You raise an eyebrow then.

"Why doesn't it mean anything?" you ask. You don't know why you're probing but you enjoy teasing Mark, hearing him search for words to form an acceptable answer.

Mark just shrugs though, "I just like this mood...being here with you, I like it. This playlist just represents the mood."

"You're so good at bullshitting, Mark," you laugh but Mark is looking at you seriously now.

I know you on the way, but now I want it I can't take it I'm merely tryna chill, but I'm impatient Stay on my mind Can't sleep at night

“I’m being for real though. Like yesterday, I didn’t tell you but it was the first time someone’s given me head before,” he says, playing with his hoodie drawstrings.

“What? You’ve never had a blowjob before?” you ask, eyes wide.

“I’ve only dated one girl and she straight up didn’t want anything in her mouth so nah, it was the first time and it was amazing” Mark says.

“Well there’s a first time for everything,” you smile, feeling happy that you got to share that moment with Mark.

You look at each other in silence again. It’s a comfortable silence but it’s heavy with intent. You both know what’s coming.

"Y/n, you know I'm not good with words," Mark says and then he pulls you to him so that you're kissing again.

The kiss is different this time, it's slow and intense as if you're something he craves. It's the type of kiss that expresses he needs you now. His lips on yours feel so good and you kiss him back, mirroring his eagerness. Your hands are in his hair and then he bites at your bottom lip. He's gentle but it drives you crazy. His hands are travelling into your bra now.

"Mark," you whisper against his lips, "Mark we're in public."

"It's crazy, I keep wanting to kiss you," he murmurs, pressing his forehead to yours.

"I want to kiss you too, all the time," you admit.

"No one's here to see and it's dark now anyway."

You look around and Mark is right, it is dark. The rain is lashing hard against the window now, the H.E.R. track barely audible. Your breath and body heat is already steaming up the windows of the car.

"Can I touch you? I want to touch you," Mark whispers, kissing your neck.

There's no use in trying to stop, you feel your willpower disintegrating by the second. There's a desperation in Mark's voice. He's wanted this for so long, and so have you.

Before long you're a tangle of arms and legs in the backseat. Someone might find you but that prospect turns you on more than you initially thought. Your stockings and panties are pulled off and your skirt is hitched up now.

Mark hovers over you.

"Can I touch you?" he murmurs, his half-lidded eyes flick over your body.

You try to close your legs, embarrassed about being observed like this. But Mark just parts your legs with a hand, "You're so beautiful. Can I?"

You nod, you're so wet and you want to feel Mark inside you, you've needed it for so long.

Mark finds your clit easily, rubbing at it slowly but it's enough to make you wriggle underneath him.

Mark leans down to kiss you hungrily. He slips his tongue into your mouth as he continues circling your clit, faster now. You moan into the kiss and Mark bites your lip gently again. That habit he had which drove you crazy.

He breaks the kiss, still touching you and looking at you intently.

"You're so wet, do you want me that bad?" Mark teases.

You bite your lip, bucking your hips up to meet his fingers.

Mark massages you in quick circular motions. You can only focus on the sensation now, coming closer to your orgasm. Nothing matters anymore, not Mark observing your body, not the possibility of being caught by someone, nothing at all.

"Mark, Mark - please," you moan.

"Mmm?" he asks, smirking slightly.

"I want you to fuck me," you murmur, suddenly losing all inhibitions.

"But we're in public," Mark's eyes widen and you realize he's teasing you.

"Please, please fuck me, Mark."

You've never seen Mark like this before, so in control of the situation and you feel disorientated because of it.

Mark takes a condom out of his pocket then and tears it open with his mouth.

He pulls his jeans and boxers down, rolling the condom over his length. As he touches himself to adjust the condom, he suddenly looks more like his nervous, boyish self. He concentrates when he's horny and you realize how cute it is.

"I need you now, please," you whisper, feeling increasingly needy.

Mark is so soft for you, you can tell by the sudden redness of his cheeks, the begging turns him on.

"Please, Mark," you mewl, scratching lightly at his left arm propping him up over you.

Mark positions the tip against your center and you whimper at the sudden contact.

"What would the others say if they saw us like this?" Mark says.

"I don't care," you whisper, feeling even more turned on by the thought. You're not doing anything inherently bad but Mark is still your intern. Why did bad things always feel so good?

Mark’s pupils are dilated as he leans over to kiss you again, and then he slips into you without warning. You feel yourself tighten around his dick and he feels it too because he's groaning.

"Oh my god, y/n, you feel so fucking good," he moans into your mouth.

“Better than the last person you fucked in here?” you murmur.

Mark is taken aback but he clearly likes the jealous tone. He bites his lip and nods “Much better, you’re so hot, y/n.”

Mark fucks you gently, moving inside you with slow movements. His breathing hitches and he closes his eyes momentarily.

"Mark faster," you plead, your voice filled with innocence.

Mark puts a hand on your thigh and the other grabs at your boob as he starts thrusting into you harder.

"Mm fuck," you moan, feeling him hit your sweet spot.

"D-Do you like that?" Mark whispers and you can't even nod in response. You just know he feels so good.

“Who do you think of when you touch yourself?” Mark pants between groans. So he’s thinking two can play at that game.

“Ah - it’s you, I think of you Mark,” you moan.

He licks his fingers before placing them on your clit and rubbing once more. The combination makes you a moaning mess and you can't think of anything but your approaching orgasm.

“That feels good, doesn’t it?” he asks.

“My god, Mark” is all you can manage.

Mark's strokes get sloppy and he has to grip at your waist with one of his hands to keep steady. Your bodies are both damp with sweat, the leather seats of Mark's car underneath you are wet. You want to melt into Mark, you want to feel like this forever.

It doesn't take you long to orgasm. With a few more slow strokes and a rub of your clit, you pulsate around Mark's dick.

"Mark, I'm - fuck" you moan, shuddering violently with every pulse.

"You feel so fucking good," Mark grunts and his praise is enough for you to tighten around him once more. He thrusts again, groaning in your ear before he empties himself into the condom. You feel his dick twitch inside of you and pull his neck down for another kiss.

It's sloppy and needy, your tongues against each others in desperation. When Mark breaks the kiss, he collapses on top of you breathing heavily. You both lie there, trying to catch your breath. Mark's dick is still inside of you though and you can feel the warmth of it and the now filled condom.

"Shouldn't we throw the condom out?" you whisper, stroking the back of his neck.

"I like this feeling, though. Can't we just stay like this for a while?" he says and you feel shy knowing he's still inside of you, that he likes the feeling of you.

"I don't think I can keep away from you," Mark whispers into your hair.

"Me neither," you say as he props his head up to look in your eyes.

"You know yesterday I asked if you cared if people at work knew about us - did you really mean that? That you don't care?" he asks, his eyes are wide like a puppy’s and you know you're too far gone, you want Mark to be yours.

"I don't care at all, Mark", you say, stroking his hair and then his cheek.

"I'm gonna pull out now," Mark chuckles, pulling himself out of you and taking the condom off.

He pulls his boxers and jeans up and you do the same, adjusting yourself into a sitting position.

Mark opens the car to dispose of the condom. Luckily it isn't as busy as you thought outside thanks to the uninviting winter cold and darkness.

As you both get back into the front seats, you look in the mirror, fixing your hair but not bothering with your makeup, which has sweated off completely.

Mark turns to look at you, "You look beautiful, y/n. Seriously."

"Anyway why did you ask me if I care or not?" you ask, trying to change the subject because you're blushing too hard now.

Mark drives away from the parking lot and back towards Incheon bridge.

His eyes are focused on the road but you know he's thinking of what to say next.

"I was just wondering, well, if I can see you again tomorrow. For a proper date?" Mark asks.

"We did go on a proper date, Mark, we ate seafood and walked on the beach. I loved it," you say.

Mark bites at his lip. He looks nervous as if everything he's done with you so far has lead up to this moment.

"I can't lie, I really like you. Like to the point where I want to be around you all the time," Mark murmurs and his face is going bright red again.

Your stomach is fluttering from the sudden confession and you're can't look at his face anymore. You press for him to go on, though.

"Mmm?"

"Being able to talk about normal shit, do normal things, it's made me realize how much I enjoy spending time with you. I don't even want to drop you off tonight."

He clears his throat, "I think I've fallen for you, y/n. I know I sound stupid but you wanted to hear it. I like you and you don't have to accept it, we can go back to work and forget this ever happened, go back to norm-"

"Mark," you cut him off, "I like you too. I've liked you for ages, I just didn't want to be the first to admit it."

"Why?" Mark chuckles, his eyes wide. He looks genuinely taken aback.

"You're my intern! Why would I confess first? That wouldn't be professional," you laugh.

"Well we're past professional now," Mark admits, "But if anyone asks, I can just say I've been giving you a helping hand." He winks then and you can’t believe how easily you’ve fallen for this dork.

As you drive across Incheon bridge back to Seoul, you look out of the window and see the same stretch of sea that you saw on the way there. Except this time, the sea is not a glittering blue, it's black, barely noticeable against the wintry evening sky. The passage of time in Mark's company comforted you, it reaffirmed how much you wanted to see each subtle change of the world with him.

"And to be honest, I don't care if anyone at work knows. It's better if they do know we like each other," Mark says quietly, reaching out a hand to stroke yours instinctually.

"Yeah, they've probably guessed already. I don't mind though, half of them are fucking anyway."

Mark laughs at your candidness. "For real though, the number of times I've seen Jaemin and Jeno come out of the unused toilet together is crazy."

"Don't forget Lucas and Mina in the stock cupboard," you point out, giggling.

"We're going to have to find our own spot before they're all taken up," Mark says, his tongue poking at his cheek. He was such a tease.

You could see the first few stars sprinkled across the sky through the car windscreen. The rain had cleared and it was one of those beautiful, chilly winter nights. Still, the stars made you feel solitary.

"I don't want to be alone tonight," you admit to Mark quietly.

Mark nods "I'll stay. So the cinema and aquarium tomorrow, how does it sound?"

"It sounds lovely," you smile.

You see the city skyline in the distance, nothing more than a cluster of twinkling dots. You're excited, the night is young and filled heavy with promise.

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geminisholland · 4 years ago

Note

heyy hunny, how are you?? If you’re still taking requests, maybe like reader, tom and paddy bonding time? like them taking paddy out for hot chocolate/coffee, and just strolling around the city ... maybe the two of them helping paddy with girl problems and all. just fluff and bantery in general hehe :)) thanks!

a/n: ugh nothing hits better than some good ol’ fluff.. thank you for your patience <3 you are so appreciated!!

warnings: fluff

word count: 1521

join my taglist!

Staying with Tom’s family was always an adventure, the amount of testosterone in the house was a testament to that. You loved going to London to be with his family, though. They were all truly amazing people that you loved being around, and they loved you as well. They put your comfort as their highest priority, making sure you knew that this was your home as well.

“So, what’s on the schedule today?” You asked while walking towards Tom. The two of you stood in front of his bed, your eyes locking with one another. You moved your hands to his chest, leaning against him as you kissed him.

“Mmm,” He hummed during the kiss. You pulled away to look at him again, a smile creeping on his face. “I was thinking we could just walk around the city, maybe be tourists for the day?”

“Tourists?” You questioned. “You would do that for me?”

You smiled as he pulled you closer to him, his hands on your waist. You interlocked your hands around the back of his neck, the two of you interlaced together.

“I would do anything for you, darling,” Tom responded, eliciting a smile from you. He kissed you once more, then broke away to start getting ready.

The gloomy weather in London tends to bring down the mood of others, as they do desperately craved the sunshine. You, on the other hand, were drawn to the gloomy days. You loved everything about them, the way they made you feel. How the weather brought people together, more specifically how the weather brought Tom closer to you. He loved to snuggle, the two of you would be walking down the street, and he’d open his jacket and wrap it around you. He made sure you were always warm, but most importantly, warm from him.

When the two of you made your way downstairs, you were welcomed by every member of Tom’s family, and you flashed all of them a smile. One thing about the Holland’s, was that they were always there. You didn’t mind, really, but this meant no alone time with Tom. Today, you were getting that alone time- just the two of you, being tourists in London.

You were discussing your plans with everyone, barely noticing that Paddy had snuck away from the conversation, going upstairs to talk to Tom. You were deep in conversation with Harry about how to properly pronounce words when Tom tried to pull you aside.

“Y/N,” Tom whispered in your ear, making you turn around to face him. “I need to talk to you, let’s go in the hallway.”

You nodded, your face was filled with concern as he took your hand into his own, pulling you away. Paddy stood in the hallway, looking back between both you and Tom.

“What’s going on?” You asked, looking between the two of them.

“Tom promised me hot chocolate,” Paddy stated.

You raised an eyebrow, “What?”

“Okay, a little back story, Paddy,” Tom shot back. You were looking at them with an extremely confused expression. Paddy and Tom kept looking at each other, giving you no explanation.

You started to laugh, “What is going on?”

“Paddy is coming with us, we’re getting hot chocolate, and listening to his problems,” Tom explained. You started to laugh, you could tell that Tom and Paddy had been bickering before they came to this conclusion, and it was quite amusing.

“Okay,” You responded. “I’m excited! Who’s excited?”

You looked between Tom and Paddy, then chuckled to yourself. You shook your head at them, then walked away.

“I’ll be waiting in the car!” You called out.

Tom drove into the city, talking about a new project he has coming up. You and Paddy talked about the best places to get hot chocolate, and never missed an opportunity to make fun of Tom.

“My agent thinks this movie is going to be really big,” Tom explained, keeping his eyes on the road.

“Anything you’re in is big,” You responded, flashing a smile to him.

“That’s what she said,” Paddy whispered.

You shook your head, a small chuckle escaping your lips.

“That’s not how that saying works, Paddy,” Tom responded, shaking his head. Paddy couldn’t see it, but a smile formed on Tom’s face.

The three of you eventually made it to the cafe with the best hot chocolate, according to Paddy. After you ordered your drinks, the three of you started walking the streets of London.

“So,” You started, turning to look at Paddy. “Can I ask why Tom promised you hot chocolate?”

“It’s nothing,” He dismissed. You looked up at Tom, and he just shook his head.

“Girl problems,” Tom admitted.

You placed your hand over your heart, as you gave a soft chuckle.

“Aw, Paddy,” You began.

“I don’t want to make a big deal out of it,” Paddy responded. He huffed out, then took a sip of his drink.

Tom placed his hand around your waist, pulling you closer to him. You also wrapped your hand around his waist, the two of you walking together.

“Well, I’m a girl,” You joked. “I might be able to help!”

“I don’t know,” Paddy started. “I’m embarrassed.”

“What?” You stared at him. “Why?”

“Don’t be embarrassed, mate,” Tom responded. “We’re here to help you.”

“You have to promise you won’t make fun of me,” Paddy said.

You and Tom looked at each other before looking back at him.

“Of course we won’t!” You said.

“I was more talking to Tom,” Paddy joked, a smile forming as he looked up at Tom.

“Piss off,” Tom said. “I would never make fun of you,” he paused. “For that.”

“Tom!” You exclaimed, playfully hitting his chest with your hand. He flashed you a smile, then placed a kiss on your forehead.

“It’s just that,” Paddy started. “Well, there’s this one girl that I really like, and I want to ask her out, but I don’t know how she feels about me.”

“Do the two of you even talk?” Tom asked, half-kidding.

“We talk every day! After school, she facetimes me!”

You looked at Paddy, your mouth wide open. “What are you waiting for, it’s obvious she likes you!”

Paddy shook his head, “What makes you say that?”

“Umm, mate, if she calls you every day it’s pretty obvious,” Tom explained. “Y/N used to text me every day, and that’s how I knew she liked me.”

“Yeah,” You started, looking up at Tom. “And you called me every time you saw my text. We would talk for hours.”

You leaned onto his shoulder as the three of you kept walking, giving Paddy endless advice. The drive back to the house consisted of you and Tom hyping Paddy up, creating a game plan on how he was going to ask the girl out. He was incredibly grateful for the advice, and was extremely excited about his plan. In fact, when you got back to the house, he immediately ran out of the car to start planning. You and Tom looked at each other, and started laughing.

“Oh to be young again,” You whispered. You sat in the car, your body facing Tom’s.

“You talk as if we’re old,” He responded. He placed his hand on your cheek, moving a stray hair away.

“It sure feels that way,” You joked, laughing into his hand.

“Paddy has that effect on people,” Tom chuckled. The two of you sat in the car, not ready to face the entirety of Tom’s family right now.

The grey clouds that hung above you turned angry, water hitting the windshield of the car as you and Tom talked. You smiled, you loved this weather.

“Should we make out in the car?” Tom asked. Your eyes grew big, you couldn’t hold back your laughter.

“What?” He cried out. “Don’t you want to feel like a teenager again?”

“Oh,” You whispered. “I absolutely do.”

With that, you climbed into the backseat of the car with Tom, laying down in the leather seats. The rain splattered outside, the warmth of your bodies causing the windows to fog up. Tom placed his lips on yours, your hands tangled in his hair as he towered over you. He moved his lips down your neck, leaving a trail of warmth along your body.

“I love you,” You breathed out. Tom stopped kissing you to look at you. He was breathing heavy, the curls of his hair covered his forehead.

“You what?” He whispered. His cheeks were growing red.

“I love you, Tom,” You said. His silence was making you anxious, your breaths started to become heavy.

Then, he let out a sigh of relief.

“I have always loved you, y/n, the minute we met I knew,” He started. “I was waiting for the right time to tell you, but I was nervous that it would be too soon, and I jus-“

You brought your lips onto his, interrupting his rambling. You pulled away for a second, looking at his face as you held it in your hands.

“For the record,” You breathed out. “I felt the same way.”

hiiii!!! if you see this, how would you feel about me including the last fic i read in my own posts, so like a recommendation kinda? i think it would be a unique way to promote amazing writers, let me know what you think! send me either yes or no, my inbox is open!! thank you!!

taglist:

@white-wolf1940 @holyfrickfracks @stylessugarhigh @lilhoodhippie @lowkey-holland @lmaotshollandd @thehumanistsdiary @tomshufflepuff @zspideyy @lovely-blackinnon @hollandfanficlove @minejungwoo @th45 @stylessugarhigh @holyfrickfracks

#tom holland #tom holland one shot #tom holland oneshot #tom holland fanfiction #tom holland imagine #tom holland x reader #tom holland x you #tom holland x y/n #geminisholland #tom holland fluff

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willy-bee-tree · 4 years ago

Text

Not such a bad idea

Hi! This is my first Imagine fic so please bare with me! If I used any violin terms incorrectly, please let me know! (Btw, this wasn’t proof-read, so, sorry for any mistakes) Thank you and enjoy!

Fandom: BNHA/MHA

Summary: You play violin and the class realizes how sweet you are.

Pronouns: he/they

You had been playing violin for two years now, unbeknownst to the rest of 1A. Fortunately for you, the class had dropped any inquiries about your home life once you made it clear you didn’t want to share. Of course, with the class’s individually saddening backstories, they had assumed it was because you had a terrible life and constantly tried to make you feel better despite your reassurances all was fine. In reality though, you had the best life he could hope for! Living with your aunt and her pet hamster was quite nice despite your peer’s worries.

After you all had moved into the new dorms however, things were able to calm down a bit. At least, as much as it could with Bakugou and Midoriya in the same vicinity along with the other students who just seemed to want to hype them up despite the fact that both of them could literally murder any of them at any given moment. So...crazy, but less annoying. Yay.

Back to the original point- so long story short, you are a major violin god and are too modest to admit facts. Like seriously, people could thank you for saving the whole world and you’d go ‘oh, it was nothing! I’m sure anyone else could have done the same and even better too!’ Anyways, you had no intention of ever playing violin anywhere near the rest of the class, that is...until today.

“Ugh, I miss it when we were kids and our parents could just turn the lights out and boom. Passed out. Goodnight. If i still had the power to do that, I’m pretty sure I could end world hunger here and now.” Kaminari grumbled sleepily while leaning back against the common room couch from his seat on the carpeted floor. The whole class had flocked into the common rooms for a movie night after a particularly hard day of training, and were now laying in precarious positions on the furniture.

“I know right!? I’m pretty sure at this rate, I’m gonna pop a vein from all the all-nighters I’m pulling.” Sighed Sero from across the room on the floor. After all the tests and extra spar sessions they had done recently, they were lucky they had the energy the even walk out of the rooms. After a few small attempts at choosing a movie the group of cranky teens had just given up and started conversing amongst themselves. This specific part in the tiring conversation was where everyone whined about their equally tiring week.

“I dunno guys, I could only really sleep when my mom sang to me.” Midoriya quietly supplied from his perch on a misplaced beanbag chair. ‘Thank god bakugou is asleep’ you thought ‘or he would have started mocking Midoriya and all hell would break loose.’

“Yeah, like deku-kun said, i couldn’t really sleep at all without one of my parents playing music.” Uraraka lazily commented after snuggling closer the the couch arm. “What songs did your mom sing to you deku-kun?” She inquired after a moment.

“Oh! um there was this one song that she would sing to me… it was called hurts like hell by fluerie.” Midoriya stuttered once he collected himself from the attention suddenly focusing in on him.

“Dude! Isn’t that song like, super sad? Why would she sing that song??” Kaminari asked incredulously, his brain not quite realizing the sweet nostalgic state Midoriya had slipped into. Upon being asked that question Midoriya furrowed his brows in very faint hurt.

“It’s a really beautiful song kaminari-kun! Plus I was four! I didn’t understand half of the songs lyrics!” He defended, making Kaminari finally realize he was contradicting something close to Midoriya's heart. It seemed the rest of the class realized this too if all of the ‘shut the heck up’ looks being chucked Kaminari’s way hinted anything.

“Oh shoot- sorry bro! I didn’t mean anything bad by it!” Kaminari blurted out, abruptly straightening up into a sitting position. The electric blond boy frantically waved his hands in front of him, trying to convey his sincerity. “Besides, your right! It is pretty cool!” He tried to reason.

“Yeah! It sounds very manly!!” Kirishima called with a wide grin adorning his face. He shifted slightly away from the cushion he was leaning on to raise his fist in a friendly manner. This exclamation quickly dissipated all of the tension in the room, prompting an energetic conversation about old memories to strike up between the class members. That is except for one particular (H/C) haired male.

You couldn’t shake the look in Midoriya’s eyes out of your head. While the green haired boy was reminiscing about this past comfort, his eyes seemed to light up with galaxies of different worlds, times, and memories. His face softened impossibly so, and his normal anxious nature seems to lift a bit. Just then, you were reminded of how Midoriya was the main one out of you who had had issues with sleeping those past few weeks. And suddenly, an idea was struck in your plotting mind. ‘What if i played that song tonight? Would it maybe help Midoriya sleep? Wait no! He wouldn’t want me to meddle in his own life! Just forget I even thought this! But..,what if it does help…? Ugh, stupid hopeful thoughts, making me hopeful.’ You sighed, realizing your mind wouldn’t leave you alone if you didn’t do this for your classmate. ‘So much for getting sleep tonight’ you thought.

“(Y/N)? Are you ok?” A voice called out, making you snap your head up. You realized the whole class was gazing at you with various looks of concern and worry. That is except for bakugo, who, despite the animated conversations having been thrown over his head, stayed passed right out out on a small armchair.

Blushing slightly, you sheepishly replied, “sorry, I was just thinking!” This answer seemed to satisfy the class and they soon returned to their conversations.

‘Ok. I’m doing this tonight and that’s final.’ You confirmed, despite your subconscious already preparing to sprint down the halls to deliver the gift like you know you will. You were just barely able to contain the urge to do just that immediately and started fidgeting with your sleeve in the effort.

This was going to be a long night.

<><><><><><><>

‘Why did I decide to do this? Why the heck did I ever consider doing this??’ You were currently sitting at your large, tidy desk, holding your black electric violin with a small microphone held up on a stand in front of you. ‘I’m really about to do this, huh?’ Is the last thing you could think before you opened up google and started scouring the internet for hurts like hell by fleurie. You found it fairly quick, due to all the times you had done the same thing for yourself alone. ‘I can just stop this all right now and nobody has to know’ you reasoned with yourself. You opened the lyrics. ‘I will just say, I’m not going to do this. Sorry Midoriya, just can’t do it’ you opened the violin music sheet option on the corner of the page. Before you knew it, you were staring down at what you could no longer stall. ‘Gosh, you better absolutely love this Midoriya.’ Sighing, you propped the phone against a stack of books on your desk, getting into position with your bow poised and fingers holding the strings in A minor. Closing your eyes, you let your bow slowly sail across the strings, fingers dancing in tandem on the fingerboard with the beat your foot was tapping out.

How can I say this without breaking?

How can I say this without taking over?

As the first lyrics were introduced into the sheet music, your bow sung for the silent voice ringing in your head, the melody jumping out of the violin. ‘Maybe.. this wasn't such a bad idea after all?’

How can I put it down into words?

When it’s almost too much for my soul alone...

Preparing for the next lines, you slowed your bow into a slow vibrato. Just as the notes start to pick up, the high pitched vibrato turns into a low G note, dragging into a prolonged, aching chorus.

I loved, and I loved, and I lost you

I loved, and i loved, and i lost you

I loved, and I loved, and I lost you…

Skimming your bow over the tight strings, leaving only a faint ghost of sound emitting from your instrument before slowly picking up again. Furrowing your brows, you let the final chords ease out.

...and it hurts like hell…

Finally, you let the melody and chorus completely peter out. Letting out a small huffed laugh when you noticed how your entire body had relaxed. With a click, the microphone that was recording your little talent show flipped off. ‘Now, for the easy part!’ You thought gleefully before setting your violin down in its awaiting case on the floor.

Walking over to the large chest next to your bed, you pulled out the CD maker that you had been allowed to keep after a particularly good project in music arts. You plugged the recording gear into the CD maker, moving over the art supplies hanging on the wall. Grabbing some teal construction paper, double sided tape, and your favorite black fountain pen, you got to work. Folding the paper into a large envelope was easy, just a few fold there, and a few creases there! However, adding the tape to keep it in shape without messing any of the folds up was a bit harder. After a few failed attempts and a lot of paper cuts later, you had managed to pull something decent together. With fumbling fingers, you uncapped the pen and went to write a note on the unblemished back of the envelope. ‘Hmmm, what wouldn’t sound like I’m a stalker who found out about Midoriya’s childhood and decided to send him a poisoned letter??’

Dear midoriya, Hi! I’m from your class and i noticed that you haven’t been sleeping well lately, (WICH YOU SHOULD) and you said something about this song helping you sleep! Since i know how to play the violin, I thought I might help you out! I hope i didn’t mess any of it up and i only really played the first two verses but hope you like it! Goodnight midoriya! Sincerely, your worried classmate

P.S. (please try to sleep more! It’s not healthy and could affect your training if you don't get at least 8 hours of sleep every night!)

Deciding that that was decent enough, you recapped your pen and set it to the side. As you turned around you were delighted when you saw that the CD had been finished and was waiting for you to retrieve it. Quickly sliding it out of the slot, you stared down at your creation. ‘Maybe this wasn’t so bad after all.’ Smiling, you slipped the shiny disk into a case and put it into your DIY envelope. Finally, you were able to gaze at your masterpiece with pride! ‘Now, for the not-so-fun part’ you said, deflating a little.

Gathering the gift into your arms you glanced at the clock that read; 9:23. ‘Perfect’ you thought as you slinked out of your door, quietly closing it behind you. Taking a deep breath, you practically flew down the stairs (albeit quietly), not having the patience to wait for the elevator. You saw Midoriya’s door quickly coming into view as you slowed down. Breathing heavily, you slid the envelope underneath his door before you could chicken out. Later that night you blushed furiously at how you had practically punched his door and zoomed back up to your room. Wow, way to give a present (Y/N). Way to go. Anyways, it was about time you slept anyways. As you slipped into a peaceful sleep, you dreamed of violins and broccoli.

<><><><><><><>

Yawning and scrubbing at your eyes, you slowly shuffled into the common room. It was around 10:47 in the morning and you were just two skip’s and a hop from chugging an entire blender's worth of coffee. You started walking to the kitchen doors about to do just that when you noticed a little blob of other 1A students, a bubble of delighted shock encircling them. ‘Oh god did I miss something already?’ You mentally cursed as you begrudgingly quickened your pace, heading towards the small group.

“Guys? Is something happening?” You asked, your voice still slightly veiled in groggy sleep. That is, until the whole class turned to you with massive grins and evil glints in their eyes. “U-uhmmm, what’s up? Guyss?” Huffing a nervous laugh, you were suddenly very aware of the lazy pajamas you were wearing. The class however, only seemed to grow even more amused and excited when you let out the chuckle.

“I knew it was you!! Pay up kiri!” Mina yelled, breaking the foreboding silence. Her answer though, only served to make you even more confused.

“Wha-” you managed to get out before Midoriya was suffocating you in a tight embrace.

“THANK YOU SO MUCH (Y/N)!!!” He managed through his big, wet tears. As you stood there, being hugged to near death by a certain broccoli-boi, who was crying his tear-ducts out in your hair, and thanking you profusely, everything seemed to finally click.

“Oh.” You stated simply, not trusting your mouth to make anything other than a verbal keysmash of you tried to articulate something more. The class burst into laughter at that, that is except for Midoriya (who was still crying his eyes out), Bakugo (who obviously wanted to be anywhere else in the world at that moment but was being restrained from jumping out of the window by kirishima), and Iida/Todoroki (who were very polite as always). (Also Mineta was unconscious underneath one of the couches, but no one needed to know.)

“Oh?! (Y/N) you probably just gave Deku-kun the best night of sleep he’s had since he was five and all you have to say is ‘oh’!?” Uraraka yelped incredulously after she had stopped her laughter.

“I have to agree with Uraraka. We all know that Midoriya doesn’t take care of himself as he should and you are the first person who has had any success in taming him.” Iida added once the class quieted down.

“I’m not that bad” Midoriya pouted before the entire class responded with a monotone ‘yes you are.’

“That was super manly dude!” Kirishima beamed at you. ‘Too bright’ you thought as you shielded your eyes from the bright boy.

“It was very kind of you to do that for Midoriya, (Y/N)” Momo politely complimented from her stance a little bit away from the rest of the group.

“Your violin is super great too! We should play some music together sometime!” Jiro called from her perch on a couch’s arm. With all of the compliments being thrown your way, you were starting to resemble strawberries with the furious blushing you were doing.

“H-how do you guys even know it was me?” You asked defiantly, because you’d be darned if you were going to go down without a fight. The class was silent at that, and for a second, you thought you had won. Boy oh boy were you wrong.

“Beca-because we didn’t even tell you what had happened except that i slept well yet you still seem to know??” Midoriya answered. ‘Well, heck.’ You thought.

“Also because you made that cute little chuckle you make at the end of the recording kero-kero!” Tsu added, standing next to you and Midoriya, who hadn’t let go of you but loosened his grip enough that you weren’t moments away from stepping into the purgatory. At Tsu’s addition to the evidence, the rest of the class nodded energetically. You knew there was nothing you could do to change their minds so you just decided to admit defeat while you still could. Sighing you mumbled out an embarrassed

“Fine...it was me.” At that, the class erupted on you. From all sides you were being suffocated by bear hugs or gently being praised on your skills and kindness. Both of those experiences, though, were making you blush a deep scarlet.

‘Maybe...this wasn’t such a bad idea after all…’

#mha imagines #bnha #mha #imagine #x reader #reader #you #Y/N #violin #violinist #class 1A #my writing #meadow logbook #nonbinary reader

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harryhandstan · 4 years ago

Text

I am so excited to finally be posting this for y’all! Thank you so much for all the hype and support it is very much appreciated. :) this is my piece for @goldenbluesuit‘s Christmas Fic Challenge! my prompt was the song “Do You Want to Build a Snowman?” from the movie Frozen and I hope you all enjoy how I’ve incorporated it into my Dad!Harry series. You don’t necessarily have to read the other parts to understand this one, but I’ll link them below in case you want to re-visit them.

I Want Your Belly ❄ Wonderful and Warm ❄ Washed Away in You

Thank you to @tbslenthusiast and @heartbreakweatherharry for reading over this for me and giving me such amazing feedback!

Word count: 2.3k

You still couldn’t believe the little wonder that had been created by you and Harry existed to be yours. Things hadn’t been perfect, far from it, but it was definitely a new and fun adventure you were both eager and terrified of.

The first challenge presented was finding a name perfect enough to fit your son. He was alive for 24 hours before you discovered one you and Harry were absolutely sure of. Even seeing it written on his birth certificate made your heart swell with pride.

It’s your mother who asks first, “Well, are you two gonna make a formal announcement to the press before us grandparents get to know the name of our grandson?”

“Think we’ve made them wait long enough, Harry.”

He smiles at you from across the hospital room where he sits in a chair, the baby resting peacefully on his chest. You’re propped up in the bed, wrapped in the soft pink robe given to you by him just a few days ago. Anne sits nearby, a proud grin on her face at the sight of her baby with his.

His eyes dart from the baby to you, “You wanna tell them or shall I?”

“You tell them. You’re the one that found it, been bragging about it all day too.”

“Alright then,” He gently lifts the baby, turning him to where the whole room can see him, your son’s face now scrunched up by the light from the window shining on him, “Ladies, meet your grandson, Sterling Edward Styles.”

“Oh, you didn’t,” Anne giggles, reaching over to pat your leg, “You’ll never hear the end of it, love, letting him name the baby after himself.”

“Hey! S’her idea to give him my middle name. I picked the first,” His features switch from temporarily offended back to beaming, “Wanna tell ‘em what it means, darlin’?”

“Sterling means ‘starling’, or as Harry likes to call him..”

“Our little star.”

5 weeks later, your son certainly lives up to his name, charming everyone he meets. Sweet smiles and coos at strangers from his carrier when you’re at the grocery store or falling asleep in Auntie Gemma’s arms when she comes to visit. You were not surprised he already had his father’s charismatic ability to make everyone fall for him so quickly.

With Harry’s schedule as busy as it had been, it hadn’t been easy to adjust to life together as new parents. As much as he had tried to push things back or reschedule to have more time off with you, there was only so much that he was in control of and he was away from you and Sterling more than he liked.

So it’s no surprise when he comes home one evening and the space you share is mostly already decorated for the winter holidays. He smiles warmly to himself when he hears you singing along to the movie playing from the tv, peeks around the corner to see Sterling tucked away in his swing, his eyes open and bright. Your back is turned so you don’t hear Harry approaching, continuing to sing aloud as you work.

“We only have each other, it’s just you and me, what are we gonna dooooooo?” You spin around, expecting to only see Sterling watching you, yelping when you find Harry, giggling at the shock on your face.

He bends to look out the window, “Could be wrong, but I think you have to have snow to build a snowman, yeah?”

“You’re early! I wanted to surprise you,” You weave your way around boxes to greet him, “Left the tree for the 3 of us to do together though.”

“S’nice of you.” His hands remain in his pockets as you move closer, tired eyes looking down at you, lazy smile as you work your arms around his waist. He doesn’t make you wait long, freeing his hands from his pockets to wrap around you.

He buries his face in your neck, “Missed you today.”

“We missed you too, H.”

He pulls back, turning to look down at Sterling, his arm still holding you close to his side, “He’s growing too fast. Can’t believe he’s already 5 weeks.”

“5 weeks and 3 days,” You remind him, “All the mommy blogs say we have an infant now.”

“S’that s’pose to mean? ‘Course he’s an infant.”

“Just means he’s growing out of his tiny baby stage.”

He directs his attention back to the movie playing, laughing as he teases you, “Least y’could’ve done is found a proper Christmas movie t’play while you put up decorations.”

You shrug, “It’s close enough to count. Plus he LOVES it. Think Elsa might be his favorite.”

He can’t resist anymore. As comfortable as his son may be swaying back and forth in his swing, he bends to scoop him up, one hand cradling behind his head and the other behind his back to easily support him. Sterling clearly doesn’t mind, a grin developing when he realizes who it is disturbing him.

“Don’t care what anyone says, bub. Y’ll always be daddy’s baby.”

You never doubted Harry’s capacity to love his son, but you definitely questioned his expertise and knowledge of the basics of caring for a child. He had become somewhat experienced now, tackling late night diaper changes and early morning feedings or anything else in between without complaint when he could.

Though he had done great, you were never too far away that you couldn’t offer assistance when he needed it. So when he gets a rare day off and suggests you let him stay home with the baby while you run errands, you’re hesitant.

“Do ya not trust me?”

“Of course I do. You know I do. I just don’t want you to get overwhelmed.”

“S’just for a few hours, right? You can write out a list of his schedule if it makes y’feel better.”

Sterling’s stretched across your lap, dozing off while you try to finish the last of your breakfast. Harry stands at the counter, drinking coffee out of a bright pink mug. You look between your almost sleeping son and then back up to Harry, chewing a bite of toast as you contemplate the idea.

He doesn’t take offense to your hesitation, quite the opposite actually. He adores the sight of you, Sterling’s face squished against your chest; one of his hands tucked under his chin, the other wrapped around your side, his little fist holding tight to your t-shirt. It’s the purest form of love in his eyes, to see the bond between mother and son grow and deepen with each day. Makes him reminiscent of his connection with his own mother, fills his heart with so much joy knowing he had chosen someone that would give his son the same sweet upbringing he had.

He makes his way back around the counter to you, a hand resting on the top of Sterling’s head as he bends down to kiss the top of yours. He moves his hand, repeating the act of affection to the top of the baby’s head.

“Really proud of you, y’know that right, baby? Been so amazing watching you take care of yourself and our little boy, never doubted for a second you were meant for this, but it’s been more incredible than I could’ve ever imagined.”

“Proud of you too, H. Know you’ve had a lot of guilt about being gone, but Sterling and I love you so much. He already lights up at the sound of your voice when you FaceTime us from set, and I see the way he grins at you before he falls asleep when you’re here to tuck him in at night.”

His eyes meet yours, sees the moment you make your decision to say yes, deep exhale of warm breath trapped between the two of you, “You have to promise to call if anything happens, if you need anything at all. Don’t care how small it is.” He nods firmly, further setting your mind at ease, “He should sleep most of the time I’m gone, but I’ll prepare another bottle just in case I can’t get back in time.”

You feel silly for feeling so protective, and you were thankful to have Harry as your partner on this journey. His patience and support had been more than generous, covering you and Sterling in more love and adoration than you’d ever known could exist from one person. He kisses you again, on your lips this time, a hand cupping one side of your face before gently lifting Sterling from your arms, shushing and bouncing him a bit when he starts to whimper from the sudden change in his comfortable position.

“S’okay, bubs. Daddy’s got you, g’nna have us a lil’ boys day while mumma’s gone.”

You rush through whatever tasks you had scheduled that seemed so important that morning. Suddenly the groceries you needed and last minute presents you were dropping off at the post office to mail to out of town family didn’t matter, nothing did but getting back home to your boys.

It’s quiet when you shut the door behind you, almost too quiet. As much as you always prayed he would, Sterling never slept through his morning nap, so you’re surprised at the possibility of him still sleeping peacefully. Not that he was old enough to make too much noise yet, but still the silence worries you enough that you don’t even take the time to put away the groceries. You set the bags on the kitchen counter, making your way through the house to the living room first.

All your concern fades at the sight of Harry on the couch, Sterling snuggled in his arms with his back pressed against Harry’s front, his little body covered in a red and white striped onesie with a reindeer on the front, matching pair of green socks on his tiny feet. It’s such a comforting image, you once again question why you had any doubt at the thought of leaving the two of them alone. Harry hasn’t noticed your presence yet, or if he has he hasn’t said anything, and you’re content to keep it that way for a few more minutes to observe the vision set before you.

You notice the movie that’s playing, it’s the same one from a few nights ago that Harry teased you for. You cross your arms, quirking one eyebrow upwards before you repeat Harry’s words from that night out loud, “Boys day, huh? Could’ve at least found a proper Christmas movie to watch while I was gone.”

“I’ve decided you’re right, it does count. I can see why he loves it so much.” He looks up at you from where you lean over back of the couch now, a soft “hi” falling from his lips, tilting his head up to accept the kiss you offer. Sterling coos, and when you look down, he’s looking up at you too.

“Mommy missed you too, baby boy.”

“Come sit with us, lovie, watch the rest of the movie.”

“Gimme a minute to put the groceries away and I will.”

“I’ll pause it and come help.”

“No, stay,” You run your hand through his hair, pushing the curls away from his face, “There’s not that much, I got it.”

You work swiftly to put everything away, taking a minute to change back into your pajamas before you rejoin them, curling yourself against Harry’s side under his free arm. Sterling’s dozing again, most likely falling into a milk coma from the bottle he had just finished, but it doesn’t stop the two of you from continuing to watch the same movie together. You offer to take Sterling or put him in his swing, but he just shakes his head no, clinging tighter to him and you.

“S’my favorite part, this song.”

“What? It’s the saddest one. Elsa and Anna’s parents die in this one.”

He shrugs, careful not to shuffle Sterling and disturb his sleep, “Maybe, but s’catchy, gets stuck in my head more than the others.”

He begins humming along to the intro music, nudging you softly to persuade you to start singing along with the character on the screen. You sit up, dramatically clearing your throat before you do. Harry knows more of the words than he cares to admit, but would rather hear the lyrics sung by you. He giggles at you as you even change your voice to mimic the silly parts.

“It gets a little lonely. All these empty rooms. Just watching the hours tick by…”

Harry provides the tick-tock part, clicking his tongue off-tune to the ones playing in the song. That’s enough to make you laugh out loud, temporarily forgetting the sleeping baby now resting on Harry’s chest. He shushes you playfully, his body shaking through his own laughter thankfully soothing Sterling enough that he doesn’t wake up.

You compose yourself as the song turns slow and mournful, tucking yourself back to Harry’s side again. His hand works around to cup your waist, squeezing lightly to pull you closer, the vibrations of him humming along again a comforting rumble against your body. His voice is quiet, barely above a whisper as he sings the last notes of the song.

“We only have each other. It's just you and me. What are we gonna doooooo?”

Your eyes scan the whole of the room. Your boys nestled together next to you, the tree in the corner of the room the 3 of you had decorated together a few days before, the pile of presents that had already accumulated underneath it. You spot your favorite ornament, a silver star with Sterling’s full name engraved on the front, “Baby’s First Christmas” etched on the back. Sterling’s first present from your family sent from home. Well, what used to be your home for the holidays. A smile spreads across your face at the simple happiness and realization that this is your home now.

Harry, Sterling, and you; sun, moon, and star, spending your first holiday together.

Thank you all for reading! As always likes/rbs/and comments are more than welcome. Tell me what you think here!

tag list: @taintedwonder, @cock-a-doodely-doo

#GBSxmaschallenge #harry styles imagine #harry x reader #my writing #dad!harry

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dirty-urie · 3 years ago

Text

Jam Sesh

Second Person

Brendon x Female Reader

PFTW Era

Smut Oneshot

NC-17

3.3k Words

Warnings in order of appearance: real person fic, alcohol, slight insecurity, fingering, some dirty talk, penetrative sex

Author's Notes:

This is... not my best work. I don't really like anything about it, but instead of wasting any more of my time on it, I'm just publishing it and hoping that my dislike for it is just me being self-critical and not because it's a really bad fic. Normally I'm all for hyping yourself up, but meh, I'm just not feeling this one, and that's okay because it's my blog and I can do whatever I want. Hope you like it though lmao

He answers the studio door and pulls you in for a hug, which is a little awkward with the guitar on your back, but you make it work. "Y/N!" He exclaims happily.

You're a little surprised that he answered the door and didn't accidentally get caught up in his work. It's not like Brendon would purposefully stand you up; he's just a little bit of a mess sometimes. But he looks happy to see you, and that's all that matters. He motions you inside, and you follow him, collapsing on the couch next to his desk.

"Beer me, Brendon!" You request, and he does, grabbing a beer from the mini-fridge in the corner of the studio and handing you the tall silver can. You wrinkle your nose. "How successful does the band have to get for you to stop buying Coors light?"

"Hey! I like Coors light," he defends, grabbing yours and replacing it with a pretentious-looking IPA. "There you go, a fancy beer because you're my guest."

"Thank you. I'm sure it'll still taste like stale piss, but now it'll taste like fancy stale piss." You joke, taking your guitar out of its case.

He laughs and takes a sip of the beer he stole from you. "Oh shit, is that new?" He gestures to your guitar. "I haven't seen it before."

"New to me. I found it at a thrift shop for 20 bucks, but it barely looks used and look, it's a fender," you say, handing him the guitar.

"Woah, Y/N, this is a find," he says, playing a few chords.

You take your guitar back and start messing around on it yourself. Brendon makes his way over to the drums and starts playing along with you. You try not to ogle or anything, but he looks fucking good giving his all to the instrument. Almost makes you wonder how he'd be in bed... intense, totally in-control. Shit, you need to stop letting your mind wander; you're just as bad as the throngs of thirsty fans. Plus, you came here to play guitar with one of the most talented musicians you know, you shouldn't let your hormones get the better of you.

After a while, you start getting hot in the stuffy studio and stand up to take your jacket and shirt off, leaving you in a white tank top. That helps for a bit, but the heat is still getting to you. "Hey, B, I'm getting hot in here. Do you mind if we go outside?"

Ever since you took your jacket off, he's been laser-focused on the drum-kit, so you're not sure he hears you at first.

"B?" You repeat.

He stops his drumming but doesn't stand up. "Oh yeah, no problem, let me just tidy up the studio a bit. Can you bring the guitars out?"

"Yeah, sure," you step out of the studio with the guitar you brought and one of his acoustic ones, but when you step out of the studio, you notice dark clouds coming towards the house.

"I think it could rain; we probably should leave the instruments inside, just in case," you tell him, walking back into the studio and leaving the guitars on the couch. You notice that he's still sitting behind the drums, his head in his hands. "Hey, Brendon, you feeling okay?"

He waves you off with a laugh, still not really looking at you. "Yeah, yeah, I'm great. Just a little headache; I'm probably dehydrated. I'll bring out some waters with the next round of beers."

"Okay, if you say you're fine, I'll wait for you outside," you say suspiciously, leaving the studio.

You settle into the outdoor sitting area, kicking your feet up on the coffee table. Brendon comes out with two more beers and two water bottles, still looking a bit distressed.

"Sorry, I cut our jam session short," you apologize, as he sits in the chair across from you and crosses his legs.

"What? Are you kidding me? We were at it for hours," you swear he blushes after he says that, but he's probably flushed from drumming, "and even if it was cut off, I just wanna hang out with you, no matter what we're doing."

"Aww, I'm so glad we're friends. Ooo, and now that we have time to talk, you can tell me all about that tour story that you didn't want to write out in an email."

You two exchange stories for another half hour, but Brendon still looks pink even after he hasn't been drumming for a while now.

"Hey, you still look really hot. You wanna jump in the pool? I don't have a swimsuit, but I could just wear my tank top and panties and then change back into my t-shirt and shorts after," You suggest. He looks a little panicked if you interpret correctly, but you're not sure why. And he's getting redder but the second. "Brendon, you look really flushed; you should cool off."

He laughs, but you don't get the joke. "I actually think I should get into the air-conditioning, we could watch a movie? Plus, those dark clouds are getting awfully close. We'll get rained-on as soon as we hit the water." Sure enough, as soon as he says that, the sky opens up, and it starts pouring. You both dash through the rain to the house. He unlocks the door, and you both go inside, laughing.

Your top is positively soaked through, and you're shivering in the cold house. "You mind if I shower real fast? I don't want to catch a chill."

Brendon is looking at something behind your head, not meeting your eyes. "Well, um, you could, um, shower here. But wouldn't you rather be all comfy at home?"

"Would I rather drive through LA traffic in the rain in wet clothes than take a warm shower in your mansion? No. I'm gonna shower." You turn around, walking into his bedroom and then deeper into the en-suite bathroom. His shower is large and fancy, and you almost don't want to get out once you're sufficiently warm. You do though, it is a drought, after all. You wrap yourself in a fluffy towel and then rummage around his bedroom for dry clothes. He clearly needs to do laundry because his drawers are sparse, and his hamper is overflowing. Still, you manage to find a long t-shirt and a pair of his boxers to wear underneath.

Brendon walks in and freezes when he sees you. "Are you," he trails off, takes a deep breath, and then starts again, "are you wearing my underwear?" He eyes the black briefs you stole that are peeking out from under the t-shirt you also stole from him.

"Yeah," you say dismissively, putting your wet clothes in your purse.

"Y/N," he says exasperatedly.

"Mm? Something wrong?"

"Something wrong? Y/N, you're wearing my underwear!"

"So?"

"So my dick has been in them!"

You turn to look at him, rolling your eyes. "Your dick has been in your hands, too, but it's not a big deal because, like your underwear, I presume you wash them." He gives you a look that tells you he's not convinced. "Plus, you loaned me sweatpants after I ripped my shorts a couple of weeks ago, and are you honestly telling me your dick has never been in those?"

"That's different!"

"It is not." He gives you another exasperated look. "Okay, if it's that big of a deal, then I'll take them off, geez," you relent, tugging on the bottom of the underwear.

"Ahh!" He exclaims, turning his head, shielding his eyes, and waving his other arm in your general direction as if to ward you off. "Let's all keep our clothes on."

"What is wrong with you? Why are you being so squirrely? Does my gross body really freak you out that much?" You accuse.

His eyes widen. "Shit, no, I love your gross body, fuck, I mean, I love your perfectly normal body," he stutters while you stare in silence.

"You've made your point," you say, not bothering to hide the offense in your voice. You grab your bag and storm out of his bedroom.

"Y/N, wait," he calls.

You stop and whip around to face him, "You've been weird around me all day, Brendon! When I took my jacket off in the studio, your eyes were glued to your drums! When I said we should swim, you offered to watch a fucking movie instead! When my shirt was soaked through, you looked right past me at the wall! When I asked to shower in your house, you nearly kicked me out! And now you're having fucking conniptions over your underwear!" You shout. "Brendon, I know, believe me, I know, that I don't look like your other LA friends. That I'm not model-skinny or anything, but god, you could put some effort into not making me feel like a freak."

Brendon furrows his brows. "Y/N, of course, I don't think you're a freak."

"Oh really? Because Nicole has been buck-naked right in front of you, and you didn't bat an eye, but apparently, the sight of my arms without a jacket is so disgusting that you can't look at me." Tears are streaming down your face now.

His face falls, and he rushes towards you, "Y/N, sweet girl, oh my god, no, no, that's not it at all. I," his voice trembles, "like you," he says quietly.

You scrunch your face in confusion. "Brendon, of course, you like me; we're friends, but that doesn't make any of your behavior today acceptable."

"Are you really going to make me spell it out?" he asks. "I am attracted to you. Very attracted to you. And this whole day, I've just been trying not to get aroused by the sight of you because that's gross and objectifying and disrespectful, so I've been staring at the ground and thinking about Margaret Thatcher naked so I didn't have to go jerk off in the studio bathroom," he confesses.

"Oh."

"And now I've made things awkward," he rubs the back of his neck. "So, um, see you later, you can keep my clothes. I won't need them back. Probably do something creepy with them once you gave them back anyway. Er, that was a joke. I should shut up."

Your offense and then confusion morph into understanding and then shock and delight. "Yeah, you fucking doofus," you laugh. "You absolutely should shut up."

You take two steps forward, closing the gap between the two of you, and grab his chin. You lean in, and your lips meet his without any reservation. He kisses back, unsure. Then, you take more initiative, looping your arm around his back and pulling him against you.

Brendon stays tentative but enthusiastic, letting you take the lead. "Fuck. Margaret Thatcher naked, Margaret Thatcher naked," he chants against your lips.

"How's that distraction working out for you?" You ask knowingly, pressing your hips against his.

His cheeks warm, and must be blushing. "I think you can feel as well I do that it's working out poorly." He's trying to make a joke, but he's right. You can feel him hardening against you as you kiss. You finally remove your lips from his but keep yourself pressed against him. He turns his face away, blushing like you suspected, and grinning from ear-to-ear.

You run your hand down the side of his face. "For what it's worth, I'm very attracted to you too, if you didn't pick up on that already. Probably why I was so upset," you say softly, "I can leave if you want to be responsible and take this slow," you offer. "Or," you trace the hand from his face down his neck to his chest, "you could take me back to your bedroom and apologize for hurting my feelings." You fake a pout.

Brendon's eyes darken, and he grabs your hand to practically drag you into his bedroom. He slams the door behind you, pinning you against it. "Is this okay?"

"More than okay," you breathe out, and he kisses you hard. You reciprocate, not caring how sloppy and desperate you feel with your probing tongues and clashing teeth. He parts to breathe and then buries his face in your neck, nipping and kissing. You tremble, grateful for the door behind you, so you don't collapse. One of his hands is above your head, supporting himself against the door, and the other is on your hip. He plays with the waistband of the briefs you're wearing, a silent plea for permission.

"Touch me," you beg, and he doesn't feign any confusion, just slips his hand under the fabric and strokes your swollen clit with his index finger. You moan, trying to ask for more, but your vocal cords aren't working. He seems to understand, though, because he moves his hand back to gently slide his middle and ring finger inside you. Instead of thrusting them like you expect, he curls them and rubs against your g-spot. At the same time, he's still stroking your clit, now with his thumb, and kissing you. His coordination is crazy good, but it makes sense with all the instruments he plays. Your core is starting to feel warm and buzzy, and you're only half-shocked that he's coaxing an orgasm from you so soon. You don't know how you're still standing; your knees are weak, and your brain feels like it's filled with a static of lust and pleasure.

Brendon feels you tightening around his fingers and speeds up ever-so-slightly. The small part of you that's still lucid feels his dick, hard and pressing against you where your bodies meet. He isn't rutting or grinding against you, just keeping you pinned against the wall with his hips, and somehow the self-control is even hotter. He presses harder on your clit, and that does it. Your orgasm explodes through you, soaking the underwear you're wearing. Your legs turn to jelly, and you slump forward onto Brendon, who supports your dead weight easily. "That's it, come for me," he coaxes softly. You bury your face into him, feeling blissed-out and overstimulated all at once, unable to do anything but ride it out.

"Y/N, darling, can you move over to the bed with me?"

You nod, letting him support you as you take small steps to his bed in the middle of the room.

"Good girl. Can't believe this is really happening; I can't believe I get to touch you. Dreamed about you for so long," he marvels.

You crawl into his bed, settling back onto your knees. "Dreamed about you too," you admit. "God, can I take my shirt off, Brendon?"

"Pretty sure that's my shirt, actually."

You giggle. "Well then, can I take your shirt off?" You wink, regaining your composure.

He laughs. "Yes, please. In both senses, take my clothes off."

You pull off the t-shirt you're wearing and throw it on the ground, exposing your stomach and breasts to his hungry eyes. His chest rises and falls quickly as he soaks you in silently, trying to get control of himself. "I like looking at you in my underwear." His voice is gravelly.

"Well, wouldn't you rather look at me without your underwear?" you offer.

He swallows and nods. You strip completely. You know your cunt is shiny with your juices, and you're pretty sure that's what's caught his attention. Brendon takes his shirt off, and now it's your turn to stare. He unbuckles his belt and unzips his jeans before taking them and his underwear off. His leaking cock settles against his stomach. He approaches the bed and gets in next to you, rolling on his side to face you.

"Fuck me," you moan, grasping his erection and stroking.

Brendon lets out a choked sound and gropes around the nightstand for a condom. He grabs one and hands it to you to roll on him. You spread your legs in expectation, and he takes the cue to enter you. He slides in easily with how wet and ready you are for him. You don't wait for him to start thrusting; you're too impatient. Instead, you rock your hips up to meet him. He hisses, not expecting the motion, and tenses his entire body to stay in control. It feels like it takes him forever, but eventually, he starts moving, slowly dragging his cock up and down. You squeeze your legs together to better feel him, and he hisses before his thrusts quicken, already working desperately towards release.

You can practically feel the veins running across him. "You're so much thicker than I would've guessed. Fill me up so nicely," you tell him. He throbs at your words, and you suspect the praise is turning him on even more, so when his hips snap forward perfectly into your g-spot, you praise him again. "So good, B, keep this angle, please." Your suspicions are mostly confirmed when he moans, and his thrusts falter a bit as a wave of pleasure washes over him. His hand moves to stroke your nipple while he supports himself with his other arm to avoid crushing you. You move your hand between your bodies to touch your clit, but instead, decide to form your fingers in a V and feel him moving between them instead. He hisses at the new sensation, and you love affecting him with your touch.

You finally do move your other hand to rub your clit, fast and hard. There are so many different pleasure points being activated on your body that you don't know what to focus on, so you don't focus on any; just let all the feelings meld into one as you lay back and mostly let Brendon do all the work. And god is he working hard; his muscles are tense and shiny with exertion, his head is thrown back with an expression of sheer bliss on his face, and his thrusts are unrelenting. Not to mention the hand still fondling your breast. He's gorgeous, too caught up in fucking you to muster any speech. You'd feel bad that he's putting so much effort in while you just get to lie back, touch yourself, and meet his thrusts when you can if he didn't seem so deeply gratified himself. Not only is the friction around his cock divine, but he also loves getting to pleasure you. Seeing your mouth fall open, unable to keep moans from escaping. The sex is messy and unrefined, neither of you quite knowing how to drive the other crazy yet, but pulling out every trick you can think of. You feel like a gamer smashing all the buttons to see what will work.

Despite the usual LA climate, the rain outside is pouring harder, and it's adding to the intensity and frenzy you both feel. "Shit, I'm close to coming," he groans.

"Hang on for me a little longer, Brendon, please. Just five more minutes," you plead. Admittedly, you could come too, but you only get one first time with Brendon, and you don't want it to end. He cranes his neck to suck behind your ear, clearly trying to get you to come faster.

"No fair, you already came," he complains, moving your hands out of the way to rub your clit himself. You use your free hands to play with your nipples, now rock hard from the constant stimulation.

"Shit, okay, come," you allow. As you say it, the first clap of thunder booms through the house. He sighs in relief, kissing you deeply as he lets himself go, getting lost in euphoria. You love feeling his hot come gather in the condom, and it triggers your own orgasm. You shriek as your second orgasm of the day is more intense than the first, and you're pretty sure you soak his bedspread just like you soaked his underwear.

He pulls out quickly and tosses the condom before snuggling up against you. "Guess your weird, gross body is good for something after all," he mumbles against your neck, already falling asleep.

"Hm, if only we could find a good use for yours," you retort, wrapping yourself around him.

#brendon urie smut #brendon urie fanfiction #my work

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bunnyywritings · 4 years ago

Text

unexpected

tenya iida x fem!reader

[a/n: he’s so cute hehehe 🥺 here’s my first Iida fic, it’s your basic summer trope but...I simp for this man on the daily, I was a little sad to see that there aren’t many Tenya fics out there so I took it into my own hands, this is slightly self-indulgent but other than that, he deserves some love so uh yeah, enjoy! -yours truly, bunnyy -`ღ´-]

Class 1-A just couldn’t take the heat anymore so they begged and begged and begged until Aizawa finally gave in and planned a class trip to the beach.

Today, the girls decided to head to the mall and buy some new swimsuits since wearing the very non-flattering school issued swimsuits would be absolutely terrible. You had gone along since you didn’t really have a swimsuit, you had one from back in middle school but it hadn’t fit you anymore. So far, they had all been able to find one they liked except you. You had been to countless stores but hadn’t really found one that caught your eye but the girls insisted on going to one more store so you could look around. As you looked around, you had started to doubt that you’d actually find one. That doubt was realized when all the ones you had tried on were the wrong size.

Once back in the dorms, Momo had offered to make you one. An offer that you gratefully accepted. You had searched online and showed her what type of bathing suit would be ideal. After thanking her 100 times or so, you had gone down to the kitchen.

“Oh (y/n), You’re back. How was the mall?” I don’t think Todoroki realized how loaded that question actually was. He and Midoriya seemed to have been just chatting, eating snacks. Iida had been making some tea.

“Uhh well it was great, the girls were able to find some bathing suits.” You sat down across from your two friends.

“Is someone wrong? It doesn’t sound like you had a good time?” The freckled boy asked carefully

“I had a good time. It was nice to hang out with the girls but I’m just a little tired.” He nodded understandingly, Shoto had grabbed the packet of pocky and held it out to you in a silent offering. You giggled and accepted the offering, he nodded in approval when you took two of the strawberry flavored biscuits. You had joined their conversation about which pro hero had the best costume, a cup of tea was placed in front of you. Looking up, Iida offered you a small smile before sitting besides you and contributing to the discussion about All Might’s costume. You blew at the surface of the drink before taking a sip. It was black tea sweetened with just the right amount of honey and a bit of milk. You blushed at the fact that he remembered how you liked your tea. Too distracted in your thoughts, you nearly jumped out of your seat when Midoriya called you out.

“You agree with me (y/n), right?” Your eyes widened before you cleared your throat. Iida’s heart started to pound when he could see the mischief in your eyes.

“Well why are we even bothering to discuss All Might’s costume when Endeavor’s is clearly the best. Todoroki. Thoughts?” He had been friends with you long enough to know that you were just pulling his leg.

“Well, as much as I see your point. Why don’t we talk about how Kamui Woods has the worst costume.” Your jaw dropped.

“Okay now wait a second.” He knew that he was your favorite pro. “That’s a little much when someone like...”

Iida gave his 2 cents here and there but he enjoyed seeing you giggle and smile while joking with the other two. He couldn’t really explain why but his heart would pound harder any time you asked for his opinion or the butterflies in his stomach would go wild when you smiled.

Finally, the beach day came. Everyone had woken up bright and early to make sure everything was ready and loading everything onto the bus when it had arrived.

“IF YOU AREN’T IN THE BUS BY 9AM, WE WILL LEAVE YOU HERE! OH YEAH!” Aizawa cringed from beside Present Mic as he made that announcement. That meant that there was half an hour before you guys would leave. You nodded, amazed at the fact that you could hear your teacher while he was still outside. You finished packing your bag before getting changed into your swimsuit, standing in front of your mirror and scrutinizing your reflection. It was nothing to do with the swimsuit itself, Momo had done an amazing job. You were just...insecure. It was a one-piece with an opening at the stomach. It looked cute when you had seen it on the model online but on you, it seemed wrong. It made your thighs look like they were bulging out of the material and the pudgyness of your stomach seemed to be accentuated. Sighing, you pulled on your shorts and tank top before making your way out to the bus. Aizawa crossed your name off the list before you boarded and took a seat beside Ochako. Midoriya and Iida in the seats behind the two of you and Shoto and Tokoyami in the row in front.

Thankfully, the ride to the beach was only about an hour and a half long. Everyone unloaded the bus, as instructed by Iida. The beach was relatively empty so it gave you guys the abilities to claim a huge spot for the entire class. 1/3 of the class had instantly stripped down to their swimsuits and ran to the water. While the rest had set up the tent, some chairs, the volleyball net, or their personal umbrellas. You had offered to share yours with Tokoyami since it was big enough and he didnt seem too keen for on being in the sun too much. Even then, he had still peeled off his shirt and was sat on his towel in nothing but swim trunks as Dark Shadow had made an appearance and started to play with the sand.

You had sat down criss cross on your towel, book in hand. You had put it down from time to time to watch your classmates laughing and having fun. Midoriya had approached the two of you and asked if you guys had wanted to join their volleyball game. You had accepted the invitation but Tokoyami had politely declined. You were on a team whith Shoji, Shoto, Denki, and Shinso. Ochako, Midoriya, Iida, and Sero were on the other team. Mina, Tsuyu, Aoyama, and Momo were watching on the sidelines, cheering for both teams of course.

Halfway through the game and you all took a hydration break but you were starting to feel the heat. Quirks were allowed so with that and the fact that your quirk had to do with fire meant that your body ran warm.

“Are you okay (y/n)?” Shoji asked as he handed you a bottle of water. His question caught the attention of the others as they noticed that your cheeks were a bit more flushed than normal.

“Yeah, why don’t you change into your swimsuit?” Ochako asked, head tilted to the side.

“I-I have it on but well...” you sighed, deciding to be honest. “I’m just a little s-self conscious.” You looked away, slightly embarrassed as the words left your lips.

“Aww (y/n), no!! You’re super cute! Come one, I bet you look great!” Mina grinned encouragingly. “Plus, the girls have seen you pretty much naked before so there’s no need to be shy.”

“Mina!” There were calls of embarrassment from both the boys and the girls.

“You do have a point...” you mumbled to yourself. You walked off to the side and started to unbutton your shorts. All the boys had looked away to give you your privacy. (because they drink their respect women juice every morning)

“O-okay. D-done.” You nervously announced as you handed your clothes to Mina.

“See! I was right!”

“W-whoah! (Y/n), no disrespect but you look hot!” Denki smirked, nodding appreciatively. As the others had started to compliment you, no matter how hard Iida tried to restrain himself, he couldn’t stop his eyes running over your body. More specifically, your thighs. The way they slightly strained against the material of your bottoms made him blush. He couldn’t help but glance at them once the game had started. The way they flexed when you had gone to bump the ball or the slight jiggle they had when you ran for the ball. Don’t get me wrong, Iida likes you for you. Your personality, your kindness, and your intellect were very attractive to him but your body was a definite plus.

Your team had won the game and while Mina, Momo, and Tsu were congratulating you, Mina caught a glance at Iida. He had looked at you, eyes softened, and a blush on his cheeks before looking away.

“Ooh it looks like you’ve caught the eye of mister class rep.” She teased.

“W-what? Mina stop m-messing around like that.” You stuttered, her previous statement was making your heart want to burst.

“It’s true though! Don’t you have a thing for him too?”

“Well yeah but-“ you were cut off by her calling him over.

“Hey Iida! What do you think of (y/n)’s swimsuit? It’s nice right?” Oh how you wished the earth would split open and swallow you whole.

“Y-yes, I do. It’s very flattering (y/n).” His answer made your heart do somersaults. “May I o-offer some advice?”

“Oh uh yeah, sure.” You were a bit confused but wanted to see what we had to say.

“As a young hero, you work hard every day to get stronger and make sure you can be the best hero possible. You should be proud of your body because it’s the fruit of that hard work and well...because you look r-really beautiful. Regardless of what other people may say.” His sudden confession made your eyes widen but before you could respond, he had run off while shouting at Bakugo about the dangers of grilling without proper supervision.

Throughout the day, the girls teased you about your crush on the class rep. Currently, you were drying yourself off after having been in the ocean for a bit. You had wanted to confess to Iida. You had been slowly gathering the courage to do so, the other also helping hype you up.

“Hey uhm Iida. Would you maybe want to get a smoothie with me? From that place up the cove?” You were fiddling with your fingers.

“I would be glad to accompany you (y/n).”

So the two of you had gone off to get some smoothies. Chatting about trivial things as you waited. He had opted for an orange and carrot smoothie while you went for the simple mango smoothie.

“So uhm, before we go back. I h-have something to tell you...” he motioned for you to continue as he sipped at his smoothie. “Right. Well I just-well I...” you sighed, taking a calming deep breath before continuing. “I like you Iida, like uhm r-romantically. I have for a while now and I just thought I’d let you know.” He was silent, still sipping at his drink while processing your words.

“Well that’s a relief. I’ve been figuring it out over the passed couple of days but I have romantic feelings for you as well, (y/n). And seeing as the both of us seem to do relatively well in our normal studies and our hero studies, I could see that balancing a relationship with schoolwork should be relatively doable.” His words stunned you.

“Wait so does that mean-“ You really we’re at a loss for words.

“Yes. It means that I would like to pursue a relationship with you. As boyfriend and girlfriend.” The turn of events made you very giddy with happiness.

“C-could I hold your hand, Iida?” You asked nervously as the two of you walked back. He chuckled and nodded, taking your hand in his.

“I can do you one better.” He had leaned down, noses inches away. “If you’ll allow me to?” You nodded, closing your eyes and leaning forward to close the distance. Lips moving together, it was inexperienced but sweet and soft nonetheless. Both of you a blushing mess as you pulled away. The rest of the class cheering from a distance as they watched the exchange.

Later on that night, during the bonfire, the both of you sat next to each other. Having already changed into some sweats to protect yourself from the cold, he had let you wear his navy blue hoodie since you were still shivering. He hesitantly wrapped an arm around your waist, relaxing when you had moved closer and snuggled up to him. He watched with a soft gaze as you joked around with Shoto and the others and partaking in eating some s’mores. The way your cheeks puffed up as you gave him a tight lipped smile, mouth full of the concoction of gooey marshmallows and chopped made his chest feel fuzzy and warm.

Even as he held you close, as you nuzzled into his chest because the ghost story Tokoyami was telling was a little too scary for you, he still couldn’t believe that you had reciprocated his feelings. The girl that he had his heart set on since the second week of school was now his girlfriend. It was times like these that made him expect the unexpected.

gєиєяαℓ тαgℓιѕт (open): @ohbois-biggay-bnha

#tenya iida x reader #Iida x reader #bnha x reader #mha x reader #i wish i could cuddle with tenya at a beach bonfire :(

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lunatens · 4 years ago

Text

felix felicis (iii)

word count: 3.0k

part iii/iv

genre: fluff, harry potter au

pairing: hufflepuff!felix x ravenclaw!reader

a/n: it’s been uhhhhhhhhhhhhh over a year since i last update this whoOPS i am so sorry to keep you all waiting. thank you to everyone who patiently waited, and to everyone who’s new, i hope you like it!! there will be one more part to this series (that i will try my best to write in less than a year lol) (also for obvious reasons w**jin will no longer be a part of this fic)

the day of the gryffindor vs ravenclaw quidditch match has your stomach in knots, not about the game itself (you really couldn’t care less about the results) but about the boy you’re going to be spending the next couple hours with.

“okay y/n, first things first: that tiny ball is the golden snitch, and-”

“felix, i’m not stupid,”

“right, yeah, sorry i’m just uhh..excited is all,’ he says shyly. you watch as the two teams whizz around the pitch, trying to keep track of all the different balls and players as felix rambles on about the rules to you. despite chan, changbin and jisung being your closest friends, you’ve never actually come out to watch them play before, always finding an excuse to stay indoors instead of sitting miserable and alone on an uncomfortable bench in typically less-than-pleasant weather.

“wow y/n, your friends are actually really, really good quidditch players.” felix comments with a look of mild surprise. “too bad they’re not hufflepuffs!”

“actually, at your last game they were telling me they wish you were in gryffindor, so i guess you’re not too bad yourself,” you comment with a small smile, and you have to stifle a laugh as felix’s face turns bright red. you hate to admit it, but felix is really, really cute--especially bundled up in his yellow hat and scarf, his hair sticking out and gently waving in the breeze whenever someone flies by on broomstick.

you watch the game in silence for a moment, still trying to find the appeal for the sport. the game’s been going for a while now, with neither team having found the snitch yet, although gryffindor’s leading in points. jisung zooms around the far end of the pitch, expertly evading the ravenclaw beaters’ attacks and catching the quaffle with a flourish. it doesn’t take long before he’s put the quaffle through one of the ravenclaw goalposts, and the gryffindor crowd roars in excitement. jisung does a lap of the pitch, posing ridiculously and waving to the crowd to get them even more riled up. you hear felix squeal in excitement beside you, and turn to look at him with curiosity.

“that’s just the best feeling ever, flying through the air and just having fun like that. it’s so freeing,” he says with a contented sigh. you furrow your brows and turn back to look at jisung, who’s now rejoined his team as the game continues.

“really? i mean, it doesn’t seem that great. it looks so cold and windy, and what if you fall? yeah, no thanks i’d rather stick to the ground,” you state. it’s not like you want to offend felix or anything, but you just really don’t get the hype about flying.

“what?? you don’t like flying y/n?? but it’s so epic!” felix says in disbelief, and you shake your head in response.

“the only time i’ve ever ridden a broomstick is way back in first year, when we had to learn the basics, and i’ve got no interest in trying again.”

“i’ve never met someone so opposed to flying,”

“well, that’s what happens when you fall off and break your wrist and can’t take proper notes for weeks,” you say, wrinkling your nose at the memory. “see unlike you, i’m not gifted with good luck.”

felix looks at you blankly for a moment, thinking to himself, before a wide grin creeps onto his face.

“no.”

“i haven’t even said anything yet!!”

“ok but i know what you’re thinking and i am NOT riding a broomstick, felix!”

“oh come on y/n, live a little!! it’ll be so much fun! what, are you afraid of heights?” felix asks teasingly. you shoot him a glare in response.

“yes!! besides, i don’t even own a broomstick.”

“yeah i kinda figured, so we can just use mine! i’m sure we’ll both fit, it might be a bit squishy though…” felix trails off in his own thoughts, and you choke on your own spit. you turn to look at the pitch, trying to focus on the game rather than thoughts of being pressed up against felix and holding onto him for dear life, breathing in the scent of h-

“eh, i think it’ll work fine. so it’s settled, after the game i’m taking you for a ride.” felix says definitively, interrupting your thoughts (good timing too, your brain was entering dangerous territory).

“i dunno, felix…. it really doesn’t sound safe, i mean two people on a broomstick? i don’t care how lucky you are, i’m not taking any chances.”

“y/n, i promise nothing bad will happen. we won’t even go that high, and we can take it slow. trust me, it’ll be okay,” felix says, tentatively placing a hand over yours and looking into your eyes. you’re silent for a moment; has felix ever been this sincere in his life? you let out a sigh of defeat.

“i better not regret this.” you mumble, and felix squeals in excitement. your heart flutters a bit when he grabs onto your upper arm enthusiastically

“you won’t, y/n!! it’ll be so much fun, i can’t wait. it’s gonna change your life for the better,” felix says confidently, and although you roll your eyes at him, you can’t help but smile giddily to yourself.

***

the game ends in an overwhelming victory for gryffindor, and you and felix dodge red and gold banners and streamers on your way out of the pitch past ecstatic gryffindors and gloomy ravenclaws. you finally make it out, your stomach filling with dread as you remember what’s happening now.

“i’ll be right back y/n, i’m just gonna go grab my broomstick from the locker room!” felix says excitedly, before rushing off into the depths of the pitch structure. you stand awkwardly by yourself, shoving your hands into your pockets for warmth. your breath escapes your lips in visibles plumes, the air growing colder as the sun begins to sink lower into the sky. one of your professors walks by, reminding you to return to the castle, and you nod, telling them you’re just waiting for a friend. it’s not a complete lie, right? you think to yourself. the adrenaline from not only your upcoming flight, but also breaking the rules again (and for felix, of all people) fills your body with jitters.

as you wait for felix for what seems like forever, your mind starts to wander. watching the game with him today was...surprisingly fun? and my goodness, the way his eyes sparkled or his voice got squeaky when someone made an awesome play was maybe the cutest thing you’ve ever seen. not to mention his freckled cheeks, rosy from the biting cold, or his tiny hands that flailed excitedly when talking about strategies. was chan right after all? do you have feelings for felix? no, that’s absurd. you’re just excited to have made a new friend is all...haha...right?

you don’t get the chance to think more about it before someone pounces on you from behind.

“Y/N!!! YOU CAME!!!!” jisung’s loud voice rings in your ear.

“ew get off me, you’re all sweaty,” you say with a grimace as you shove the excited boy off your shoulders. “but good job guys, you did great! who knew you were actually good at quidditch huh,” you tease, and chan gives you a playful nudge.

“i saw you with a certain hufflepuff boy in the stands,” he says, wiggling his eyebrows, and you slap him on the arm.

“ok he practically forced me to go, it was the only way to stop his stupid begging and whining,” you argue, and your three gryffindor friends nod their heads in clear disbelief.

“sure y/n, keep telling yourself that.” chan says, giving you a pat on the head which you swat away.

“sorry that took so long, i-” felix’s out-of-breath voice stops mid sentence when he spies you with the other boys. “oh uh, hi,” he says shyly, clearly not expecting their presence. your friends grin knowingly and changbin and jisung start to whisper to each other. chan puts on a friendly smile and greets felix back, reaching out to shake his hand.

“thanks for coming out even though your house wasn’t playing,” he says, and felix seems to warm up to chan a bit.

“i’d never turn down a chance to watch a good quidditch match! you guys are amazing,” he babbles, and you giggle at his enthusiasm, glad to see him and chan connecting.

“you’re not so bad yourself dude. too bad we’ll have to crush you in a few weeks,” chan teases, and all the boys laugh.

“i’m impressed you were able to drag this one out, we’ve been trying to get them to come to our games for years,” changbin groans, gesturing to you. felix shrugs in response.

“i mean it wasn’t too hard, just a small bribe of some chocolate frogs and here we are,” felix says, and you feel three pairs of eyes burning into your soul. you can practically feel the smirks on their faces, and you can already hear the teasing you’ll experience later.

“well anyways, we’re gonna hit up the great hall for some snacks on our way back, you coming? you’re welcome to join us, felix,” jisung invites.

“um actually...felixistakingmeforarideonhisbroomstick,” you splutter out, and you hear jisung make a strange noise of disbelief at what he just heard.

“sorry, what?” chan asks, and the grin on his face tells you he knows exactly what you just said. you let out an annoyed huff and repeat yourself.

“felix is taking me for a ride on his broomstick, and we better get going before it gets too late.” you say in defeat and embarrassment, reaching to grab a confused felix’s hand so you can get away from your friends before they have the chance to say anything about it. jisung opens his mouth to make what you assume is a raunchy joke about riding broomsticks, but a death glare from you shuts him up.

“okay, have fun! but not too much fun,” chan says with a wink before quickly ushering a protesting jisung and changbin back towards the castle. you’re grateful for the falling darkness, because you can feel how bright your cheeks are burning right now.

“i’m so sorry about them,” you apologize, and felix laughs it off.

“they seem fun,” he says, then tugs on your hand gently. “follow me, i know the best place to go where we won’t get caught. trust me, i sneak out all the time with hyunjin and minho and we’ve never seen a soul.” you nod nervously as you follow felix’s lead, praying that you won’t regret this.

after a bit of walking and some light conversation, you arrive at a small clearing near the edge of the lake.

“this is SO against the rules,” you mutter to yourself as you step over some large roots. felix gets to a spot where the sky above is clear (and growing darker by the minute), and there’s lots of room around you. he straddles the broomstick and motions for you to join him. as you make your way behind him, you can’t help but wonder if you're more nervous about flying or about the prolonged close contact with felix. there are so many layers of clothing between us, you tell yourself, it’s fine. you place your arms loosely around felix’s waist, nervous to get any closer.

“we’re gonna start off just hovering, okay? we’ll take it slow, it’ll be alright. you can tell me if you want to stop, but i really think it’ll be fine, trust me,” he says to comfort you, and you nod. felix kicks off the ground, and you gasp as you feel your feet dangling in the air. instinctively, your arms squeeze tightly around felix, and you press yourself as close to him as possible.

“i can feel your heart racing, it’s okay just relax!” felix says with a laugh.

“easy for you to say, you practically live on a broomstick,” you grumble, and you feel felix’s body shake with giggles underneath you.

“i’m gonna take us a bit higher now,” felix says, and you press your face into his back as you feel yourselves rise higher, the air getting colder as you ascend. you feel a gentle breeze tangling your locks, and the broomstick begins to inch forward. you open one eye slightly and let out a small squeak as you see how far the ground is below you. you’re almost above the height of the trees now, and felix is doing slow laps of the clearing.

“see, it’s not too bad, right?” he asks, and you force yourself to open your eyes again. if you don’t look straight down, you have to admit the view is really nice. trees and rolling hills pepper the landscape, and you can see the quidditch pitch and hogwarts a bit farther in the distance. the last rays of sun are reflecting off of the lake, and the twilight sky is beginning to sparkle with the night’s brightest stars.

“yeah, i guess it is pretty nice,” you begrudgingly agree. your knuckles are white as you hold on to felix for dear life, but the more time you spend up here the more you realize how stable he’s keeping the broomstick, and how much he does seem to be taking caution to make sure you’re comfortable. you let out a shaky sigh as you try to relax and take in the scenery as you hover above the trees.

“there’s one more thing we can do, if you’re okay with it,” he says, asking for your trust. you say nothing, simply nodding into his back; you’re afraid if you open your mouth you’ll regret it. as soon as he has your confirmation, the broomstick suddenly bursts forward and you can’t help but let out a piercing shriek.

“FELIX!!! WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING!!” you manage to yell over the howling wind. your eyes are tearing up from the cold night air, and your throat feels dry, and you’re convinced your heart’s stopped beating. felix just lets out a joyful laugh in response, yelling back to you “SHOWING YOU THE BEST THING ABOUT FLYING!” before plunging the nose of the stick into a dive towards the ground. he pulls up, of course, and does a few more fancy tricks before slowing down to a more leisurely pace above the treetops.

you sit there in shock for a moment, wide eyed and breathless, trying to take in the wild turn of events.

“WHAT WERE YOU THINKING!! YOU IDIOT WE COULD’VE DIED OR SOMETHING,” you scream in between breaths, still trying to get your heart to stop racing.

“but we didn’t, right? i told you you could trust me!! was that not fun??” he asks, giddy with adrenaline. you choose not to respond, because he’s right--as much as his sudden moves scared the living daylights out of you, you have to admit it felt pretty freeing.

“this is my favourite view,” felix says to change the topic, and you lift your head up to look around. you’re coasting above the lake, the last rays of sun painting the landscape golden. more stars are out now, and the glow of the castle feels truly magical and welcoming. you steal a glance at felix, cheeks nose and ears bright red from the cold but an awestruck look on his face nonetheless. you don’t think you’ve ever seen him look so peaceful and content, and the feeling spreads to you as you finally relax your grip a little and rest your cheek on felix’s back.

“thank you, felix,” you mumble, feeling surprisingly at ease now.

“sorry, what was that?” he asks and you can hear the grin in his voice.

“i’m not saying it again,” you warn, and he remains silent. part of you wishes you could live in this moment forever, gliding over the mirror-like surface of the water with the warmth of felix to stave away the cold tendrils of night air.

“we should uh, head back. it’s getting pretty late,” he eventually says after a comfortable silence passes. you nod in agreement, and felix takes you back to the quidditch pitch, where he returns his broomstick quickly before coming back to walk with you to the castle. the walk back is mostly silent, with the two of you hiding from professors and prefects a couple times but making it back to the ravenclaw common room unseen. there seems to be some shift in the energy between you now, the silences feeling a bit more awkward than before, but neither of you wants to acknowledge it.

“well, uh, thanks for trusting me. and sorry if i scared you,” felix says with a small laugh as you reach to door to the common room.

“it’s okay, i uh...i actually had a really good time. you’re right, you know, it is a really wonderful feeling being up there.” you admit. you have to stop yourself from adding “with you” to the end of that sentence. “so thank you for everything, lix,” you say and you cringe at the nickname that accidentally escaped your lips. felix tries to hold back a smile but fails miserably, blushing at the nickname.

“goodnight, y/n,” he says after clearing his throat.

“um..goodnight,” you say before going to answer the riddle to enter the common room. as you mutter the answer and begin to enter, you hear felix call after you.

“y/n?”

“yeah?”

there’s a long pause.

“uh, nevermind. goodnight!” he says, and before you know it he’s down the stairs and out of sight. confused, you creep up to your dormitory to get ready for bed. your dreams that night are filled with the wind rushing through your hair, beautiful landscapes whizzing past you, and most importantly of all, felix’s joyful laugh ringing in your ears.

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beauvibaby · 4 years ago

Text

7 summers – j.oleksiak

a/n: this is very very loosely based on the song 7 summers by Morgan wallen, I heard the song and it gave me big inspo and a huge shoutout to abby for hyping me up so much about this fic 🥺💖

word count: 4.7k

warnings: I was too lazy to really proofread this and I wrote it in one day so

A sigh fell from your lips as you fell down on the bed beside him, trying to ignore the debate in your mind, Jamie instantly laced his fingers with yours. “I’ll be back next summer.” He reminded you, sensing the pain you were feeling. He brought your hand up to his lips. “Forever, yeah?” He reminded you, but his face fell when you didn’t repeat it. “Y/N, don’t do this.” He spoke, voice wavering, you sat up, feeling the tightness in your chest as you pulled your hand from his grip. “Baby, please.” He followed your movements, “Jamie, I can’t keep doing this.” You whispered, a tear falling from your eye, followed by another and another–until they were streams running down your cheeks. “We can figure it out, I can fly you out on long weekends, and–“ “Jamie! Just stop. Please. Don’t make this harder than it has to be.” You cut him off, standing to your feet, shaking your head when he went to reach for you. “Y/N, I love you.” He whispered, you squeezed your eyes shut, if you listened close enough, you would hear your heart shattering. You rushed over to him, cupping his jaw in your hands and kissing him deeply, “I love you too, and that’s why I have to let you go.” Your voice broke as you pulled away from him, he didn’t try to stop you, not anymore, because he knew you were right.

***

“Mommy!” You shot up at the shrieks of terror coming from your son's room, “Asher.” You whispered, springing out of the bed, “Asher!” You shouted, running down the hall towards him as he continued to scream. “Asher, honey, what’s wrong?” You stormed in there, eyes darting around, you didn’t see anything. “Mommy!” He cried, looking frozen in his spot, eyes glued to his bedroom window, looking over the front yard. “I saw someone outside!” He shouted, you looked at him oddly. You knew it was probably his little four year old mind playing tricks on him, but for both his and your sanity, you walked over to the window, peeking out the blinds. “I told you not to look out the window at night because it scares you…” you scolded him lightly, trailing off when you saw some stupid teenagers out by the road. “Stay here.” You sighed, your son nodding, arms clenched around the blue teddy bear his father had gifted him before seemingly walking out of your lives forever. You unlocked the front door and flicked the porch lights on, “you’ve got two minutes to get your asses off my property before I call the cops!” You shouted, hearing the teenagers rushing around before they sped off on their bikes. “Freaking kids.” You grumbled, shutting the door and walking back down the hall to your son who was still sniffling. “Come on, baby. You can sleep with me tonight.” You opened your arms for Asher and he bolted into them, smiling when you scooped him up like a baby.

“Mommy, I’m too old to be carried like this!” He giggled, wiggling in your arms, “Mhm, what about like this?” You teased, letting him dangle upside down, his legs hooked around you and your hands holding his to keep him from falling. “No, stop.” He managed to squeak out between laughter, his eyes already growing heavy again, the time reading midnight. “What do you say?” You tsked, “please.” He whined, sighing in relief when you pulled him back up, his arms wrapping around your neck. “Mommy?” He whispered, you bummed softly, laying him down on the normally empty side of your bed, “is daddy ever going to see the new house?” He questioned, already unable to keep his eyes open as you pulled the blanket over him, adjusting the bear in his arms, you looked at him–the constant reminder of your ex, he was a spitting image of him, brown hair, green eyes, a wide toothy smile whenever he got excited. “No, sweetie, he won’t.” You whispered, lips ghosting over his forehead, thankfully he was already asleep. You slid in beside him, letting a few tears fall as you thought of how hard this transition for him would be. You went from being in a crappy condo with his father, to you somehow finding a house available to rent just outside the city, it wasn’t easy, by any means.

If anything, it was the hardest thing you ever did. You were working as a teacher, which was a huge upside to being a single mom, you were able to have the weekends home with Asher, and when he was at school, so were you. Your parents begged and pleaded with you to move back to Canada, but you had built a life here, friends, a good enough job, and it was all Asher knew. And he loved it, every bit of Dallas was in him.

You’d gone to Florida on a trip, you were young and impressionable, just one short year after breaking up with Jamie, when you met him. Lucas–Asher’s father. He was from Texas, but vacationing in Florida at the same time as you, the two of you falling head over heels in love, quickly, and before you knew it, you were packing your bags and moving to Texas with him. You got married in the courthouse, more so you could stay legally in the states with him. Eventually you got pregnant, and that’s when things changed, you broke up, you even got divorced once Asher was born, and then back together. At the time you thought it was the right thing to do, you thought it would be better for Asher this way, but clearly, as you laid in bed next to your son, his father long gone for the past four months, it hadn’t been the right choice.

Eventually, you fell asleep like your son, dreaming of all the things you wanted to provide him with.

***

Over the next few months you fell into an easy routine, the summer flying by, and before you knew it, you were approaching Halloween already. “Mommy! Mommy!” Asher chanted running over to you, his friend Tommy in tow. “Hi boys.” You grinned, squatting down to their level, the two of them giving you hugs. You often brought Tommy home with you when his parents were working late, they’d pick him up just before dinner. “How was your day?” You asked them, standing to your full height, they each grabbed one of your hands, happily walking towards the car with you. “Good!” They answered insync, smiling up at you, Tommy was only a couple of months older than Asher, but the difference was remarkable. “Miss Y/N?” He asked, looking up at you, blue eyes shining with burning curiosity. “Yes?” You answered glancing down at him, “Asher wanted me to ask if you’ll let him start hockey with me.” He spoke bluntly, Asher gasping from beside you. “Tommy!” Your son complained, giving his friend the meanest look he could muster, but after the word hockey your mind went blank. Hockey, hockey, hockey, that’s all that went through your mind–Jamie, he plays for the stars, how could you not think of that. You inhaled sharply when Asher yanked on your hand, “can I mommy?” He asked with a pout, you knew he’d ask this eventually, he’d grown up watching the games with you on tv, and you also knew that Tommy’s family was interested in it, it was only a matter of time. “We’ll talk about it at home, Asher.” You mustered up a smile, faltering when his face fell, normally that answer meant no. But for him, you’d really consider it.

The boys played out in the backyard, while you sat at the kitchen table with Mary, Tommy’s mom, “so Tommy is going to play hockey?” You asked, she smiled. “Yes! He’s so excited, you should consider signing Asher up! I’m sure he’d love it.” She gushed, before seeing the apprehension on your face. “Oh, I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to overstep.” She apologized hurriedly, “no! No you didn’t.” You assured her, glancing down at your phone on the table, you were both young moms, the only difference is she was still with her son's father. “You know that guy I told you about? The one from the summer before I met Lucas?” You mumbled, sighing when she cocked her head to the side, urging you on. “He played hockey,” you paused, and her smile fell, “oh, I see.” She whispered, “there’s more.” You groaned, covering your face. “He plays professionally.” You rushed, her eyes going wide as saucers, “a professional hockey player?!” Mary gasped, hands laying out on the table. “Oh my god, who is it?” She asked, glancing out the window at the boys who were still happily playing in the yard. You bit your lip, rubbing a hand over your face, “Jamie Oleksiak.” You whispered, and she definitely heard you. “Jamie? Oleksiak? Like, from the Dallas Stars?” She spoke slowly, reeling in this information. “Yeah, that’s the one.” You sighed, the back door opening, the boys walking in with pouts, “we’re hungry!”

***

It was Asher’s first day of hockey and you were happily sitting with the other parents, Mary and Josh included, eager to see your boys out on the ice. “So, how cool is it that they have some pros coming in today?” Josh grinned, Mary went wide eyed, shooting him a look. “What? I thought she knew.” He pouted at his girlfriend, you looked at Mary skeptically. “I was going to tell you, I swear, but then I found out who was coming and I didn’t want you to back out.” She rushed, realizing what she was saying, your face fell. “Mary, he’s not–“ you got cut off as the kids coach started speaking. “Alright, kids. Today we’ve got Jamie Oleksiak and Tyler Seguin joining us from the Dallas Stars, everyone say hello!” He clapped, and you could feel your stomach clench on itself. Jamie and Tyler skating out and over to the kids, bright smiles on their faces. You looked over Jamie, feeling the burning in the back of your eyes, he still had that boyish charm emitting from him. They both waved to the parents, thankfully in the crowd, you didn’t really have to worry about him spotting you. If he’d even remember you after all these years.

“I have to use the bathroom.” You excused yourself, seeing Jamie speaking with Asher, sending your mind into a spiral. “Y/N.” Mary tried to stop you, “Mary, please, I just need a minute, keep an eye on Asher.” You pleaded with her, she gave in, releasing your hand, Josh trying to figure out what was happening. “I’ll tell you later.” Mary sighed to her boyfriend, glancing back at you as you started speed walking to the bathroom. You locked the door behind you, letting out a strangled breath, you didn’t think it would hurt so much to see him again, you thought you moved on. But clearly, you hadn’t, not as much as you thought you had. “Y/N, Asher is asking for you!” Mary called, knocking softly. You snapped out of your daze, eyes instantly drying up, a smile plastered onto your face. “Where is he?” You asked as soon as you opened the door, “Josh is with him, he fell, it just scared the wits out of him.” She pouted, watching as you rushed out of the hallway. You rounded the corner and saw him sitting on the bench with Josh kneeling in front of him, “Asher.” You smiled, and he instantly looked over at you, the helmet on his head shaking as he moved suddenly. “Mommy.” He sniffled, Josh stood and went to join Mary as you took over in front of your son. “Why aren’t you on the ice learning with everyone else?” You questioned him, adjusting the helmet on his head. “I fell.” He explained shortly, and you raised an eyebrow, “that’s it?” You teased him, a smile coming on his face. “It hurt.” He mumbled sheepishly, “but it doesn’t hurt anymore does it? Sometimes when you fall you just have to get back up!” You reminded him with a comforting smile, he looked behind you. “Mr. Jamie, I’m ready to come back.” You froze at his words, you couldn’t bring yourself to turn and look at him, finally though, Asher moved to get off the bench, forcing you to move. “Want a hand?” Jamie asked, offering you some help off the ground, somehow you took his hand without him seeing your face. “Thanks.” You mumbled, finally having to take a glance up at him. He went blank, staring at you, his lips parted as it finally hit him, he inhaled sharply, releasing your hand, “Y/N?” He whispered. He looked over you, in shock that the first girl he ever loved was standing in front of him–the fact that you had a child hadn’t even hit him yet.

“Jamie.” You sighed, Asher looking between the two of you, “mommy, can I go now?” He whined, neither you or Jamie looking down at him, “yeah, honey go ahead.” You mumbled, waving him off. He trotted out to the ice, Tyler helping him as he eyed his teammate suspiciously. “You–wow, you have a son?” Jamie finally spoke, eyes following Asher on the ice. “Yeah, I do, he’s my whole world.” You smiled softly, looking over at the ice. “You should get back out there.” You added, he cleared his throat, “yeah, uh, would you ever want to grab a coffee and catch up?” He questioned, you froze, sputtering out a yes. “Great, I’ll get your number after?” He stepped on to the ice, “yeah, of course, yeah.” You stumbled over your words, heart beating fast in your chest, he probably thought you had a boyfriend, it wouldn’t be like that. You should just get out of your head. “What just happened?” Mary gasped whacking your arm, Josh looking quizzically between you two. “Uh, we’re going to get coffee and catch up sometime.” You mumbled, eyes fixed on the tall guy skating around with the kids, “that’s good, isn’t it?” She tilted her head at you, “it still hurts.” You finally turned to her, the closest friend you had here. “Oh sweetie.” She sighed, pulling you in for a hug, “if it’s any consolation, he keeps looking over here.” She whispered, you let out a dry laugh, “probably because he can’t believe how I’ve changed.” You groaned, your body was never the same after you had Asher, fuller than you had been all those years ago. “Oh don’t even go there.” Mary chastised you, pulling out of your hug, “you’re going to go? Aren’t you? Please.” She pouted, giving you a knowing look. “Wait, you know Jamie?” Josh finally spoke up, the kids cheering as practice ended, “she used to date him.” Mary told her boyfriend, he went wide eyed, “holy-“ “language!” You both scolded him as the kids started approaching, “sorry.” He mumbled, looking down at the ground.

“Hey, bud, did you have fun?” You grinned at Asher as he pulled his helmet off, “yes!” He shrieked, Tommy doing the same to his parents, all of you chuckling at their excitement. “So you want to keep doing it then?” You asked him as you sat him on the bench, beginning to undo his skates. “Can I?” He asked, breaking your heart, that he even thought you wouldn’t let him continue. “Of course you can, Asher.” You cupped his little jaw in your hand, he smiled widely, happily bouncing in his seat. “He did great.” The familiar voice nearly caused you to jump out of your skin, Asher giggled at your reaction. Jamie sitting beside him and undoing his own skates. You noticed his friend Tyler a few benches down, talking with some other kids. “A lot better than you used to do.” Jamie commented, your blush darkening, “you know my mommy?” Asher gasped. Jamie nodded with a gentle smile, “from a long time ago.” He smiled at your son, ruffling his brown hair up. “Woah.” Your son looked over at you, wide eyed, causing you to giggle. Jamie smiled at the sight, your eyes narrowing as the smile took over your face, just like he used to make you do. “Miss Y/N?” Tommy tugged on your shirt, “yeah?” You looked at him, seeing Mary and Josh smirking at you. “Can Asher come play with me at my house?” He asked sweetly, Asher looking at you expectantly, Jamie hoping you would say yes too. “Uh, sure, that’s fine.” You mumbled, shooting Mary a playful glare to which she winked, “come on, Asher!” She called, you slipped his sneakers on just in time, “bye mommy.” He gave you a quick kiss before running off with them, leaving you here with his pile of equipment. You shook your head with a small laugh, “coffee?” Jamie asked with a tilt of his head, “mhm, I guess my schedule just cleared up.” You joked, Jamie grinning at you, rushing to get his skates off. “Calm down, I’m not going to disappear.” You quipped, standing to your full height, Tyler approached, “you ready to go man?” He asked, shooting you a smile as you gathered Asher’s things. “Um, actually, I’m going to get a coffee with Y/N.” Jamie spoke, trying to signal something with his eyes to Tyler, and clearly he didn’t get the message as his head whipped over to you, “Y/N? Why does that–WAIT! Y/N, like the Y/N?” Tyler rambled, Jamie glaring at him the whole time, you looked between them with wide eyes. “You talk about me?” You whispered, eyes locked on Jamie now. He nodded sheepishly, “yeah, of course I do.” He muttered, Tyler took the chance to run off, “sorry!” He called, knowing he was in for it with Jamie now.

“Why did he say ‘The Y/N’?” You questioned, crossing your arms over your chest awkwardly, not knowing what else to do with them. Jamie shrugged, his mouth moving but he spoke so faintly you couldn’t even hear him. “What?” You egged him on, stepping closer, “because you’re the one that got away.” He mumbled, slipping his sneakers on, “oh.” You breathed out, unsure of if you should be happy or nervous that he thinks of you as that. “Can we still get coffee? I mean, there’s so much to catch up on.” He asked sheepishly, standing up, and even with the heeled boots you had on, he towered over you, it reminded you of the summers you spent together. “Yeah, we can still go.” You smiled up at him, “lead the way.” You stepped aside, blushing when he took Asher’s hockey bag from you. “Ladies first.” He gently directed you in front of him, smirking at the pink tint covering your cheeks.

“Wait, so you were married?!” Jamie nearly choked on his coffee as you told him about Lucas, he’s the one who asked, and you didn’t miss the smile when you said you were single. “Yeah, not for too long though.” You sighed, stirring the sugar in your cup once again, “we got divorced when Asher was a month old, then we got back together, just dating.” You paused, “then he left right before Asher turned four, in January.” You concluded your story, leaving out some details, like how you were terrified every man would leave you both again, how you and Lucas had gotten into a huge argument and you told him to leave, not expecting he would actually do it. “I’m sorry, Y/N.” Jamie sighed, reaching for your hand, “that’s fucked up, he doesn’t deserve either of you.” He assured you, rubbing his thumb across the top of your hand. You nodded, taking in a sniffled breath, “yeah, what about you?” You steered the conversation away from you and your past, Jamie easily agreed and told you some stories about his brief time in Pittsburgh, “but I’m really glad I came back to Dallas.” He mumbled, you lifted your eyes to meet his, hearing the change in his voice, he was already looking at you, the same way he used to. “Jamie–“ “Y/N, don’t do this again, don’t push me away without giving me a chance.” He cut you off, “if you’re genuinely not interested, that’s fine, but please don’t block me out of your life again, I don’t think I could handle that.” He pleaded with you, shattering your heart, you had to make a decision, to be vulnerable with the man that you truly never stopped loving, or to be reasonable and protect not only yourself, but your son.

You shook your head, “it’s not just about me, anymore, Jamie. Asher is the most important thing in my life.” You whispered, voice shaky, “I know, and that’s fine by me, I wouldn’t do anything to hurt him.” Jamie pointed out, subtly sliding his hand closer to yours. “Not intentionally.” You slipped up, Jamie’s gaze faltering, “one date, Asher won’t even know, he won’t get hurt, and if you can wholeheartedly tell me that you don’t feel anything for me anymore–then I’ll drop it. I’ll leave you alone if that’s what you want.” He bargained with you, and you couldn’t deny the excitement bubbling in your chest, the effort he was already putting in. “One date, Jamie.” You agreed, releasing some of the tension between you two, “one date.” He grinned.

***

“I love you, baby, have fun with Tommy tonight, ok?” You gave Asher a big hug and an obnoxious kiss on his cheek, “I will, mommy.” He giggled, pushing off of you, “thank you, both, again.” You thanked Mary and Josh, “it’s no problem, they’ve been wanting to have a sleepover anyways.” Mary brushed you off, “now, go get ready for your date.” She teased, pushing you towards the door, “maybe you’ll be having a sleepover of your own.” She added. “Mary!” You gasped, “I wouldn’t.” You blushed, “the look on your face says otherwise.” She smirked, “have fun!” And with that, she shut the door in your face, forcing you to leave and go get ready for this date.

You spent an ungodly amount of time getting ready, nitpicking everything you did, straightening your hair but then deciding you should curl it, which of course it didn’t hold after being straightened, so now you had this in between style going on. Then your makeup, you kept going back and forth between what to do, how much to do. Finally settling on simple eyes and a dark red lipstick to go with your dress.

The doorbell rang as you were slipping your boots on, you took a deep breath before standing up and walking towards the door. You turned the handle, slowly pulling it open to reveal Jamie, your breath hitching in your throat, the black pants and light blue printed button down hugging him just right. You had the same affect on him though, the red velvet dress falling perfectly over your body, the v neck showing just enough to be classy but still sexy, the dress stopping just before your knees. You dressed it down slightly with your heeled black combat boots, the two going better together than you would think. Jamie swallowed, his Adam’s apple bobbing in his throat, “you look incredible.” He finally spoke, neither of you realizing how much time had passed, “thank you, so do you.” You replied honestly. “Thanks.” He chuckled, eyeing you once more, “ready to go?” He asked, clearing his throat, you nodded, grabbing your small purse, “ready.” You smiled, stepping out the door with him. “Should I be worried about you kidnapping me?” You joked as he opened his car door for you, “I should be asking you the same thing.” He retorted, the two of you falling into easy banter during the date, conversation flowing, neither of you drinking more than one glass of wine, so you knew it was genuine. You couldn’t stop the fluttering in your heart as he walked you up to your front door, his hand low on your back.

You turned to each other after you unlocked the door, “I had a great time tonight, Jamie.” You whispered, biting your red stained lips, his eyes flickered down to them. “Me too.” He murmured, tucking a piece of hair behind your ear. “We should do it again sometime.” You leaned into his hand, he rested it on your cheek, the other coming to rest on your hip. “Really?” He asked softly, shuffling a little closer to you, his head tipped down, “yeah.” You let your eyes flutter shut, his breath fanning over your face. “Can I?” He whispered, the patience he was practicing was only making you want this even more. “Yes.” You whimpered, his lips on yours not even a second later, you turned to putty in his hands, your hands sliding up his chest before interlocking behind his neck. His lips moved against yours perfectly, you whined against his mouth when he slid his hand into your hair. Finally you had to pull away to breathe, “Jamie.” You sighed, smiling up at him, a peaceful look on your face. “Did you want to come inside?” You asked, twirling your fingers in the hair on the back of his head, “are you sure?” He questioned, the hand that was on your hip now delicately running up and down your side. “I’m sure.” You leaned into him more, “you’re so beautiful.” He groaned, kissing you again before pushing the front door open, letting you guide him through your house. His eyes never once leaving your body as you held his hand, pulling him along.

“We don’t have to do anything.” He whispered, not moving his hands from your waist as you ran a hand along his jaw. You nodded, contemplating your decision, you wanted this, you wanted him. You trusted him, even after all these years, he was still the sincere Jamie you knew when you were a teenager. Your mind quickly flickered to Asher, how this would affect him, if it would affect him. “Jamie, I know it was only one date.” You paused, glancing away for a moment, his hand came up to your chin, gently turning you back to face him. “I don’t want to scare you off, but if we do this, it has to be all or nothing. I don’t want to be hurt again, and I can’t let Asher get attached if you’re not committed to us.” You explained, expecting him to step away, to at least take a moment to contemplate this. “I won’t hurt you.” His voice was so gentle, hands moving to cup your face. “If I do, you have permission to kick my ass.” He joked, sighing in relief when you laughed. “Ok.” You grinned, attaching your lips to his, falling into a gentle rhythm with him. His hands grazed over the tie on the side of your dress and you tensed, he pulled back to look at you. “We don’t–“ “I want to, I really want to.” You cut him off, closing your eyes for a moment, “it’s stupid, really, but I’ve changed a lot, my body has changed a lot.” You trailed off, understanding coming across his face. “Ok.” He shrugged, you raised an eyebrow at him, “I still think you’re gorgeous.” He added, shocked that you would even think otherwise.

You blushed and moved his hand to the tie on your dress, nodding for him to undo it when he looked at you hesitantly. He tugged on the strings, watching them come apart, but the dress still clung to itself, he brushed his hand under it, watching as the fabric fell open, his eyes ran over your body. The small stretch marks left on your stomach from when you had Asher, to the way your thighs stuck together, you went to cover yourself back up when he didn’t move, but then in a flash he had you laid back on the bed, smiling down at you, “gorgeous.” He whispered, going on to show you just how gorgeous he thought you were…

That one date led to many more, to Asher loving him, to moving in together, to a marriage and two more kids.

That one date led to the rest of your lives.

taglist; @vinceduhn @jackiesquinn @kiedhara @kempe @vincecdunn @literarycharleton

#Jamie Oleksiak #jamie oleksiak imagine #Jamie Oleksiak fic #Dallas stars #nhl writing

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suchalonelysunflower · 4 years ago

Text

“One of the Boys” (M.C)

Pairings: Michael Clifford X Reader

Summary: College!AU ~ Friends to Lovers. You and Michael are best friends since forever, that’s why you feel the need to hide your crush on him. But when he makes a hurtful comment, you are determined to prove him wrong. Could that be enough to make him love you?

Warnings: The reader uses she/her pronouns, I’m sorry if I make anyone uncomfortable with that, it was not my intention. Angst with fluffy parts. Language, low self esteem issues, cheating (a little bit, it depends on how you view it) one sexual reference and some grammar and syntax errors (English it’s not my first language, I’m sorry)

Word Count: 5.5K

Author’s Note: My first Michael Fic! I waited so long and it’s finally here ✨ This is slyghtly based on a personal experience (mine didn’t have this ending) I hope you like it! Feedback, reblogs and comments are always welcomed, I love to hear from you guys 💕 You can read my other works HERE 🦋

You had to admit it, you weren’t exactly a very ‘feminine’ girl. But that the hell was wrong with that? Yes, you preferred leggings and big hoodies over skirts and tight dresses. Yes, you skateboarded everyday to school and hanged out with boys all the time, drinking beers instead of fancy little cocktails. Yes, you never really cared about boy bands or artists like Justin Bieber or Drake. And yes, you would rather die than have high heels on for more than 2 hours straight. But that’s just who you are, how you’ve always been. His comment shouldn’t have hurt that much, but why are you crying about it?

You have been roomates with Michael since you two started college. You always joked about how you were going to live together someday and have a fridge full of junk food and soda. Well, now you do (except from the junk food part, that proved to be an awful experience)

To be honest, you didn’t have that many friends besides him and your other four knuckleheads you know and love from your early school days. Luke was the youngest of all of you, and maybe that’s why everybody thought he was the innocent one (even though he was the mastermind of almost every prank you ever pulled) Calum was the shy one, as people would put it, but just get to know him a little bit and you wouldn’t be able to shut him up. Ashton is supposedly the mature one, but his quick-witted mind and his inability of staying put in a place gives him the same amount of energy as a five year old. And then there was Michael, your best friend, there isn’t a time in your life where Michael wasn’t by your side, weather it was for pulling a prank on someone, skipping school or just playing video games in his basement, he was always there. So moving in together was a no brainer.

The friendship consisted on having the same level of confidence as an old married couple, trusting each other with everything, nothing being off limits, well, except for one thing…

You and Michael were friends and nothing more. That was clear for both of you. For years you both ignored the teasing and assumptions of you guys being a couple. Just the idea of it seeming so absurd to even imagine. But there’s a fine line between love and friendship.

Over the last few years, you began to think that the idea of being Michael’s girlfriend didn’t sound so bad after all. It was impossible to pin the pivotal point of that thought, but somehow somewhere along the road, you started to feel more flustered every time he leaned into a hug, felt butterflies in your stomach with each look he speared your way or how he said your name with such a caring tone. You found yourself thinking of him more often than not, especially on how his arms would look around you waist, how it will feel to be loved by him, to kiss him…

But you couldn’t think like that, not about your best friend. So it’s better to keep it hidden in the deepest part of your soul, praying to whoever’s above that it will go away soon, but when does that ever work?

Maybe that’s why his comment hurt so bad.

It was a lazy Monday, you didn’t have to work today and that meant you could spend your afternoon beating Michael’s ass in video games. But you couldn’t concentrate with your thoughts wandering over the man who owns your heart. It was the third time you let him win in Mario Kart when he caught on your mood.

“You really suck today, huh?” Michael asked as he watches Mario celebrate yet another victory.

“Or maybe you’re finally getting good” You replied, resting your head lazily in one hand, not taking your eyes from the screen.

Michael furrowed his brows, worrying as he heard a light sigh come out of your lips “Hey, are you okay?” He asked, but you don’t seem to hear him, so he accommodates himself on the couch in order to look at you properly and puts a hand on your leg, just right above the knee “Y/N?”

“Huh?” You say, finally lifting your gaze in order to meet his and oh, how you wish you didn’t. Lost in the sea of those green eyes that consumed every thought of your mind, you felt yourself blushing under him and trying very hard not to think on his hand touching your thigh “What? No, yeah. I’m fine.”

“Liar. You let me win, that never happens. Tell me, what’s wrong?”

“Nothing’s wrong”

“Y/N,”

“Nothing’s wrong, Michael. I swear”

His eyes scanned you, knowing damn well something was up.

“Well,” He said, patting your leg, softly “If you’re not gonna tell me… Then I will make you”

Before you could even comprehend what he meant by that, he was already leaning over your figure with a devilish grin as his hands traveled to your sides and started tickling you mercilessly.

Tears formed in the corner of your eyes as you couldn’t contain the laughter that came over you. Begging him to stop, you tried to escape his grip, but it wasn’t the first time this had happened and you know this is a fight you can’t. Michael joined in laughter as he came closer to you, pinning you under him on the sofa.

But suddenly, his movements stop as he becomes very aware of the position you’re in. You give one last laugh before turning to face him, only to find him already staring at you. You shudder under his gaze as you realize the way his legs are intertwined with yours, wondering if it’s his cellphone on the pocket of his shorts or something else is brushing up against your lower body.

Michael’s eyes never leave yours as your breath becomes even. And he couldn’t help but notice the way that your lips parted slightly, almost inviting him for a taste.

“Hey, dude, sorry to bother you but.. Oh shit, you’re fucking on the couch?” A voice came through the door, making you push Michael onto the floor before getting caught in that position. Raising your head over the sofa, you were met by Ashton and Luke’s grin disappearing from their faces as your face came to view “Oh, it’s just Y/N. WAIT, Were you fucking Y/N?!”

Rolling your eyes and giving them the middle finger, you stand up from the couch, regretting ever giving them a key in the first place, and went straight to the bathroom, trying to hide the red of your cheeks.

But just before you could close the door, you heard Michael say “What are you talking about? It Y/N! She’s practically one of the boys!”

He didn’t mean to hurt you. He had good intentions with that comment, of course he did. But you couldn’t stop overthinking it, crying at the thought of you being so unattractive in his eyes.

“So he wants a girly girl?” You thought, already planning a strategy “I’ll show him, then”

That’s how it started. You began to wear the dresses that were long forgotten on your wardrobe, you started using makeup and styling your hair in something other than a messy bun.

It was confusing at first and not at all what you were used to, but there was a new energy surrounding you, a confident one. You were going to show Michael that you could be feminine, maybe that way he’ll notice you in a ‘more than just a friend’ kinda way.

The first time the boys saw you with your new look they were all sharing breakfast in your kitchen. With your apartment being closer to campus they might as well move in.

“Good morning, guys” You said cheerfully, not looking at anyone in particular.

They all stared at you, looking at you up and down. And just before you could reach the cereal box, the questions started coming.

“What the hell is going on?”

“Y/N why are you dressed like a girl? IS THAT MAKE UP?”

“Do you have a date? It’s 8 am on a Tuesday! Who are they? Vampires?”

“Who are you and what did you do to our Y/N?”

“Is the simulation broken?”

“Shhh” You said, raising the palm of your hand as you poured cereal in a bowl “It’s too damn early for any of you to do that much noise and I haven’t had my coffee yet” As in que, Ashton passed you your usual mug “Thank you, and to answer some of your inquiries. 1) Nothing’s going on, Calum. 2) I happen to be a girl, Luke. Thank you for noticing. 3) I do not have a date, nor I should use that as an excuse to put on some nice clothes. I just,, felt like it” You took a long sip from the hot beverage “The simulation broke down a long time ago and I’m still me. I’m just wearing different clothes, that’s all. Right, Mikey?”

Michael choked with his toast, coughing as he tried to gain some composure “Yeah, you look… great” He said with a shy smile, and he was right. The others joined in with the compliments, hyping and teasing you about how he will have to be more protective of you because you will sure bring home some hot dates looking like that.

It’s been a couple of weeks since that morning and everyday Michael complimented you. You’d be lying if you say that every word he says doesn’t fill your heart with butterflies. Maybe there’s a possibility that he feels the same way.

It was a pretty uneventful evening in the little coffee shop where you worked. You didn’t have many clients today, so the dim lights and the sweet voice of Hozier that blasted through the speakers allowed you to daydream. Michael’s face popped out in your mind, smiling as you remembered the way that he looked at you this morning. Finally proving that you were more than just “One of the boys”

You were so caught up in your thoughts that you didn’t hear the bell chime when the door opened, only waking up when you saw those same eyes that had you smiling just a minute ago standing in front of you, staring at you as well.

“Hey Y/N! How’s it going?” He asked, smiling at you.

“Nothing much” You shrug “Just the same amount of pain and tiredness of the average college experience” Michael rolled his eyes at your sarcasm. That’s when a giggle caught your attention.

The most beautiful woman you ever laid your eyes on was standing next to Michael. She had the bluest eyes you’ve ever seen and her wavy hair complemented her face like an angel. She sure didn’t seem real, how did you not notice her when she entered? Were you really that busy focusing on Michael?

“I can totally relate to that” The girl said with a smile, god even her smile was perfect.

“Y/N, this is Veronica. Veronica, Y/N” Michael introduced.

You smiled politely at her and she did the same “Oh, the famous Y/N! I heard a lot about you, I can’t wait to get to know you better”

Um, what? Michael has been talking about you? To her? You couldn’t tell if it was good or a bad sign.

“Really? Well, don’t believe anything he says. Unless they are good things, then he’s right”

“Okay! Thank you, Y/N” He interrupted, mocking annoyance “I’ll take my usual please, darling. And she will have…”

“Just a mocha, please”

You nodded “Coming right up” You smiled at her as she walked to a table. Michael leaned over the counter and whispered.

“Could you do one of those drawing people do in the coffee? She will love that. Thanks.” He gave you a kiss on the cheek and walked away, sitting close to Veronica in one of the booths just before he could notice the way your cheeks turned to a much brighter red.

An hour passes. Then two. Then two and a half. And you were standing there, acting as a witness of their chemistry. You cursed yourself as your eyes drifted towards them, watching them laugh and talk about life. It was clear that Michael was enchanted by her, moving closer and closer every time, and you could tell the feeling was mutual as she laid her delicate hand on his.

Of course Michael would go for the pretty girls. Veronica was gorgeous, you couldn’t pinpoint a single defect on that girl, not even with a magnifying glass and you hated that. You hated the fact that he brought her here, you hated the fact that you have to work while his love story unfolds like a Taylor Swift song, you hated that it you weren’t the one sitting next to him, talking about dreams and how everything just collides perfectly within the universe. But that’s not your story.

“Earth calling Y/N?” A voice calls in front of you “Hello?”

You blink a few times and stare at the tall blond man waving his hand in front of your face “Sorry, Luke. Didn’t see you there” You excuse yourself “What can I get for you?”

“The usual, but this time with at least four more shots of espresso. I have to put an all nighter again cause I have that stupid presentation and you are not listening to me again”

“Sorry, what? Four shots of espresso, yeah.” Your gaze averted his “Anything else?”

“Okay, what’s going on?” Luke followed where your eyes led and soon he was, too, staring at the reason of your distraction “Oh”

Out of the four of them, Luke was the only one who knew about your feelings for Michael. He was always very supportive and didn’t pressure you into confessing right away, knowing it must be hard for you. So he can’t imagine what is going on inside your head right now, watching the man you love on a date.

“He didn’t tell me he had a date” You told him.

“He mentioned this morning” Luke added “Said he met her at one of his classes and that she seemed cool. So he asked her out. He never told us he would bring her here “You clenched your jaw, trying to keep the tears at bay. Luke noticed that “I’m sorry, love. I thought he told you about it”

“She is gorgeous, Luke”

“She’s not you, though” You scoffed.

“Exactly”

“Y/N…”

“I’m fine,” You lied “Really, I’m okay. It was a silly crush anyway. And plus, look how happy he looks”

And it was true. Michael did look very happy chatting and flirting with Veronica. His smile reaching his eyes as she spoke and laugh at all his jokes. He truly must like her, and you… Well, some people are just meant to be the side character of another person’s story.

Luke let out a sigh, knowing well enough to assume you are just going to bury your feelings like you always do “He will soon realize what he’s missing”

************************************************

Well, six months passed and he still hasn’t realized. It’s been six month since that fateful evening where you got your heart broken by the man you love. It’s been six months since Veronica has been a constant part of your daily life, sleeping over, joining on movie nights and replaced your spot next to your best friend. It’s been six months of dressing more ‘girly’, wearing make-up and doing your nails, all of it trying to call Michael’s attention, to make you look more like Veronica, more like someone you are not. And all of that for what? You still ended up crying yourself to sleep almost every night.

Luke has been there for you all this time, letting you crash in his place whenever she came over and trying to distract you from the heartache by making jokes or goofing around, sometimes even letting you stay the night just to talk or cry or whatever you needed.

Tonight, however, it was a special night. Michael texted you saying that he finally found the movie you were dying to see for years! It was a special straight to dvd movie with Betty White that you remember it being your favorite growing up but you could never find it anywhere. And to say that you were ecstatic when Michael suggested a movie night for the two of you, would be an understatement.

You got the popcorn ready, ordered some pizzas and the ice cream was in the freezer. It was the first time in months that you would have time alone with Michael and, honestly, you missed him like crazy. Yes, you know he lives there, but it’s been a while since you guys actually talked or shared a good laugh together. Putting your feelings towards him aside, you just missed your best friend.

Suddenly, the bell rang. It wasn’t uncommon for Michael to forget his keys, so you weren’t really surprised.

“How many times do I have to tell you that we bought you that keychain for a reason and-“ But it wasn’t Michael standing at the door “Veronica.. I thought you were Michael”

The girl smiled, (really, not even a chip tooth?) “Yeah, he told me he’ll be a little late and that I should just go ahead” She said as she made her way into the apartment.

“Oh?”

“Yeah, I love movie night!”

He invited her. It was a moment for the two of you and he invited her.

You couldn’t be mad, could you? She’s his girlfriend, after all. She could be here and he had every right to invite her, but… But it still hurt. You thought you’d be spending the evening with your best friend, he said you would. It was a special movie for the both of you, why invite her?

“Can I be honest with you, Y/N?” Veronica said, pulling you away from your mind.

“Uh, sure”

“I have to admit, I was really intimidated by you”

“By me? Why?”

“Well, when Michael talked about you I always thought I had to compete for his attention. It was always Y/N this, Y/N that… He assured me that you were just friends, but I didn’t believe him until I met you. I love that he has a friend like you. You really mean a lot to him so, thank you”

You nodded and muttered a “no problem”

She was right, you were just a friend of Michael’s. Why did you ever think you could be more? Especially with someone like her in his life? It was foolish, it was crazy. He would never look at you the same so, why keep trying?

“So, what are we watching?”

“Oh, um… I don’t know. I’m not staying” You said, hiding the pain in your voice.

“But Michael told me-“

“I’m spending the night at Luke’s today. I totally forgot”

You rushed out of the living room and went straight to your room, letting the tears fall as you started packing for a few days. You needed to get away as soon as possible. You couldn’t handle staying here at the moment, it hurt too much.

Just as you were packing the last pieces of clothing, you heard Michael opening the front door. And surely, a few moments later he was pushing yours open.

“What do you mean you’re not staying tonight?” He barged in.

Your back was facing him, so you couldn’t see him, you didn’t want to see him, but he sounded hurt. Quickly, you wiped your tears with the back of the hand and tried to muttered something close to an unbothered tone.

“I’m going to Luke’s”

“You always go to Luke’s, are you two a thing or something? Because you seem to live there more than here”

You let out a small laugh, was he really that dense?

“There’s nothing going on between me and Luke-“

“Then why are you always in his place?”

“It’s none of your business”

“Well, Y/N it is. It is because I wanted you to spend the night because we rarely see each other anymore and now you’re ditching me again!”

He raised his voice a bit, clearly frustrated and confused. That alone made your anger take the best of you.

“Oh please, as if you really want me here”

Michael frowned “What does that suppose to mean?”

“Why did you invite her?”

“Veronica? She’s my girlfriend, I though-“

“I know that she’s your girlfriend, I get it. It’s just-“ You took a deep breath, trying not to cry or scream or both “It’s just that tonight was special, and I wanted to share that with my best friend. Only with my best friend. But I feel like everytime we try to do something together she’s always there and-“

“You don’t like her?”

“What? No, that’s the worst part. I actually think she’s great” You turned around and closed your bag, ready to leave “Michael I’m not going start a fight, I’m going to stay with Luke for a while. Don’t wait up”

You made your way out of the room, but before you could reach the door Michael’s hand grabbed you by the arm, making you stop.

“Michael” You warned “Let me go”

“No, wait. What do you mean with ‘that’s the worst part’?”

“I’m not having this conversation right now.”

“Yes, you are” Michael made you turn around. You were now looking at him in the eyes, he seemed hurt but you,, oh, you were in pain “Y/N, what is going on? You’ve been avoiding me lately, you’re not staying home, you don’t talk to me anymore, you’re dressing differently and sneaking out everytime I’m here. Is it because of Veronica?” You shook your head, slightly “Then what is it? Why are you pulling away from me?”

“Because it’s too damn hard!” You say looking away from him, unable to contain the tears any longer.

Michael’s eyes winded at your answer. His lips parted in surprise at your sudden outburst, wanting nothing more than to hold you but knowing you won’t let him.

“What?”

“You don’t get it, do you? No, you never did” You cry silent tears as your voice comes barely above a whisper “I can’t stay here because it hurts. Everytime I’m here she’s here too, like a reminder of everything I’m not. And I’ve tried-“ you choke “I tried to look more pretty, to be more ‘girly’ and feminine, losing myself every day. Hoping that maybe you’ll notice”

“Notice what?” Michael said softly.

You let out a breath.

“That I’m in love with you, you idiot”

Michael was taken aback by your answer, but he still wasn’t letting go of your arm. You love him? That’s what’s this all about?

“But I know you don’t feel the same. You never did and you never will. After all, I’m just Y/N. Just ‘one of the boys’ am I not?” He didn’t respond “It’s okay, I came to terms with that, I wouldn’t expect you to say something anyways” You released yourself from his grip and grabbed the last bag that laid on your bed “I’ll stay with Luke tonight and I’ll pick up my stuff in a few days”

Michael shook his head, as if he just realized what you just said “Wait, you’re moving?”

“What do you want me to do, Michael? Stay here? Pretend that things will be the same after this?! Go and have a movie night with your girlfriend and say that everything’s okay when I’m tearing myself apart in front of you?” You ask out of anger “I can’t do that, Michael. I need time”

“Y/N-“

“Why do you care anyways? I’m not a main character in your life. I’m not the type of girl you would fall for, or that you would consider feminine enough. I’m not pretty enough or funny enough and I’m tired of that. I’m tired of being an afterthought”

You turned around, already reaching for the doorknob when Michael’s hand wrapped around your waist, twisting you so your back was pressed against the door and your eyes were on him.

“Y/N, you were never an afterthought” He breathed close to you.

“Michael, what are yo-“

“Stay, please” But before you could say anything else, you felt his lips on yours.

The kiss was everything you dreamed it would be. Fast, rough and passionate. His hands traveled down your spine as he deepened the kiss, getting more needy by the second. Your hands flew to his neck, bringing him even closer, wanting to feel every part of him. You wanted to let yourself go, to fill these long needed desire. But you couldn’t forget about the girl waiting in the living room.

With all the strength you could manage, you pushed Michael away from you as the tears came flooding down again.

“What the fuck is your problem?!” You spat at him in anger “You can’t do that to me. You can’t just kiss me and expect to fix everything. Who do you think I am?” You could tell he was trying to say something, but you were not in the mood to listen “I won’t let you do this to me. I won’t let you do this to her. I’m leaving, Michael. Get your shit together”

And with that, you ran through the door and didn’t look back.

A few hours later, you were settled in with Luke in his apartment. When you arrived, you asked him to please not say anything, that you weren’t ready to talk just yet. He just nodded and let you in.

You cried on his shoulders for what it felt like an eternity. Your head was pounding and your voice was hoarse. You’ve never felt so heartbroken before.

“C-can I stay here for a while? Until I find my own place?” You asked him.

“Of course, darling” Luke said, kissing your head “Take all the time you need”

You stayed like that for a while. He comforting you through your silent tears until you fell asleep.

A week passes by and you are not feeling any better. You haven’t been sleeping well and you’re barely eating despite Luke’s pleads. Ashton and Calum showed up one day to check up on you, but you still refused to talk about it. Maybe you were embarrassed, maybe the memory of that kiss was too recent, too painful to talk about. Maybe you just didn’t know how.

One night you fell asleep on the living room, the TV working as the background noise that drowned your thoughts. You were peacefully dreaming for the first time in days when the sound of muffled voices woke you up. You were still laying in the sofa, but Luke was nowhere in sight. That’s until you heard him talk.

“I don’t think it’s a good idea”

“Please, I need to talk to her” the other man pleaded.

Michael was standing at the door. He looked like a complete wreck. His hair was undone and a bit greasy from ruffling it with his fingers way too much, his eyes were bloodshot and glossy, still fighting to contain the tears in front of his friend.

“Look, man. I love you, but she doesn’t need this right now and-“

“Let him in, Luke”

The two tall men turned towards you. You were standing behind the sofa, your eyes never leaving Michael’s. Luke simply nodded and headed to his room, giving you the privacy you needed.

“I’ll be there if you need me” He said to you.

You muttered a small ‘Thank you’ to him before fixing your gaze upon Michael. He was still frozen by the door, unsure on how to say what he has to say.

Letting out a breath, you decided to break the ice “Michael-“

“I broke up with her” He said in one breath.

“You what?!”

“The night you left,,, I-I broke up with her because I couldn’t keep lying to myself anymore”

“What do you mean?”

He hesitantly took a step closer to you, afraid that he was overstepping again.

“All this time, for years, I’ve been avoiding my own feelings. Tucked them away at the farthest corner in my closet, hoping that they’ll fade soon. I couldn’t cope with them, I was too afraid to.

‘“I told myself that I was being foolish, immature and downright stupid for thinking that the girl I love would love me back. How could she? She was beautiful, shared my sense of humor, my interests and she was extremely cool. I told myself that a girl like that could never want me. But, strangely, she did, as a friend. And I was content with that, at least I would have her be part of my life.

‘“So I hid my feelings until I couldn’t see them, but that didn’t mean that I couldn’t feel them. And every day I would remind myself that she was my friend and I was beyond lucky for that. I kept letting myself down on a daily basis, trying to keep the thoughts away, hoping that one day I could believe them. But I never thought of the consequences my actions had towards the girl.

‘“Y/N, when you left I felt like I couldn’t breathe. Like a vital part of me was missing and you took it away with you. And I deserved it, I truly did. Y/N, I was an asshole”

“Michael,”

“No, I was. Hearing you say those things about yourself, like you were broken and needed to be fixed, it broke my heart, darling” His voice broke at the end, fighting helplessly to contain the tears that were burning behind his eyes “I- I never meant for you to think that I didn’t love you for who you were. That you needed to change in order to get me to like you. You shouldn’t change for anyone, love, you are absolutely perfect the way you are. You always have been and always will be.

‘“Y/N, you were never just ‘one of the boys’, you are my best friend, my soulmate and the best thing that has ever happened to me by far. I’ve always known that, but I was just too much of a coward to let it show and I’m sorry.

‘“When you told me you loved me, god. Y/N, I’ve never felt so happy and confused at the same time! I couldn’t fanthom the thought of you loving me, it seemed surreal after so many years of telling myself that it was impossible, almost like a cruel joke. But you did, and I could tell by your eyes that it was true, and I hated myself for that. I hated the fact that I was hurting you instead of loving you like I wanted to. I hated the fact that you felt like you had to leave in order for you to fix what I broke. I hated that I ruined our first kiss by a stupid impulse because you didn’t deserve that. You deserve the world and I was so scared of the fact that I might’ve lost the chance to be able to give it to you.

‘“ I broke up with her the night you left. It wasn’t fair to you, to her or to me to keep denying my feelings any longer. And I know that I don’t deserve it, but I’m standing here to ask you for forgiveness. I’m sorry that I made you feel less than you are. I’m sorry that I broke your heart. I’m sorry that I wasn’t brave enough to tell you this the moment you walked out the door that night. I will keep apologizing for the rest of my life if necessary, Y/N. But I just- I just don’t want to lose you”

You were standing in front of him. Tears rolled down your cheeks as you took in everything he said to you.

He loved you.

He loves you.

And you love him.

Michael was staring at his feet, too afraid to look up and see the disappointment in your face. To scared to lose you and everything you meant to him. Maybe coming here was a mistake, maybe you don’t want to know anything about him anymore. And he deserved that.

“Well,” You finally say, swallowing the lump in your throat “You still owe me that movie night”

His eyes light up as he saw you smiling at him. He returned it by grabbing you by the waist and pulling you closer to him. Leaning so your lips could met again.

Smiling into the kiss, you swore that you will never let go of the other again.

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bigskydreaming · 3 years ago

Text

In a mood and I’m trying not to be, but oof. Not easy at the moment. Real life stresses are kicking my butt and I’m decidedly limited in resources for addressing that at the moment, so might as well get this off my chest, lol. Already lost the usual fifty followers or so I lose every single time I post about stuff the way I did the other day, so what’s some more, y’know?

So earlier today I tried to get my mind off things with some fic, and happened across one I hadn’t read before that promised Jason and Dick talking things out and bonding. Halfway through I sighed and went oh, this is familiar, and skipped to the bottom to check the end notes and comments to see if there was any mention of this next part, but nope. The reason for the sigh was it took me about halfway into the fic to realize that it was blatantly inspired by my post about what if Jason was missing some memories from his death/resurrection and the Pit, like specifically the ski trip they took, stuff like that. Now I’m not so egotistical as to think nobody but me has certain ideas, but its fairly easy for me to recognize when someone is basing something off a post of mine because of specific turns of phrases that I use and like, they hit ten or so bullet points from my post without missing a one. Like, there’s parallel evolution and similar ideas, and then there’s going down a check list, y’know?

And don’t get me wrong....I don’t mind people basing stuff of my posts, being inspired by them, etc. I WANT that. I’m GLAD to have that happen.

The part I mind is the way this all ties back into my interaction with fandom as a whole....and this fandom’s interaction with me. Which I don’t tend to hear NEARLY as much about as I tend to have people giving me shit about my impact on fandom....but ONLY the negative impact.

In the four years or so that I’ve been active in this fandom, I can think of only three people who have given me some kinda shout out for being the basis of one of their fics. Three people. And in that time I’ve come across literal dozens of fics that I am almost certain can trace their way back to popular posts of mine. There’s the post about Jason’s memories and the ski trip for one - this fic isn’t an isolated occurrence, I’ve found a good half a dozen or so I feel fall into the same pattern. There’s fics based off my posts about how fucked up the blame Dick got for Spyral was, with my certainty based on the fact that I know I’m the only fucking person who ever brought up various key phrases like “Bruce not having an extraction plan for Dick’s highly dangerous undercover op, leaving him stranded when Bruce got/(chose) amnesia.” I made a big deal about that in a few posts because of the fact I NEVER saw that particular element raised in any fics, and a couple months after I started including that bit regularly, I was seeing the words ‘without an extraction plan’ in every other new post Spyral fic. That’s not a coincidence.

There’s been stuff that included bits and phrasings from my post about Dick and Jason being partners who focused on helping kids who had been abused specifically....oh wait, no, my bad. The two fics I’m thinking of there lifted straight up entire lines from that post but just made it about Jason and TIM doing that instead, despite like.....the entire basis of that headcanon stemming from Dick’s juvie origin but whatever. There’s been stuff based on juvie posts of mine, stuff based on posts I’ve made about Mirage, there’s been stuff based on the post about Jason looking into why Dick was undercover as a mob enforcer and then Renegade, there’s been stuff clearly inspired by my headcanons about Jason calling Dick for advice after the Garzonas case. I could go on. There’s a fucking LOT.

I don’t try to give myself too much credit but I’m not unaware of being a loud voice in this fandom and that having an impact. And like I said, I’m not adverse to inspiring people to make their own stuff based off an idea they initially saw me present. That’s fine. People should feel free to do that. My problem is that none of this exists in a vacuum. It exists in a fandom where I regularly get people lecturing me on my presentation, people hyping up how negative I make fandom, my condescension, my anger, my hostility, etc, etc.

But the thing I never see is any awareness whatsoever that like....dudes, I’m literally just a guy on the internet. And that goes two ways. Yeah, I have an impact on people, but they have one on me too. And I’m tired and frustrated by it being acted like this is a one way street and everyone is just helpless victims of my bullying, while meanwhile SOME OF THE EXACT SAME PEOPLE GIVING ME CRAP FOR MY NEGATIVITY are ACTIVELY adding to their own fics with stuff that I JUST posted about.

And like, I see people vagueblogging about the negativity on their dashes and its impact on fandom right after I have a Dick Grayson rant blow up and get a few hundred notes......but its acted like I DID that to fandom, that’s my negativity and mine alone when its like....y’know, if you’re not following me yourself, and this stuff is still on your dash, you uh....have to be following people who reblog my negative posts for some reason or another. And given that there are obviously reasons you follow THOSE people, maybe instead of worrying about what I’M doing all the time, you can spare a thought or two for the fact that I don’t have any power to make people reblog anything, and for whatever reason, something about my oh so negative post resonated with those people reblogging it onto your dash, which also kinda suggests it wasn’t negative in THEIR eyes, but was actually a kind of validation of thoughts or feelings they already had?

Trust me, there’s no mind control ray at work here. This mood is also brought to you by the cricket sounds that come every time I fucking BEG people to reblog and signal boost posts I make about rape/abuse fandom trends and depictions from my POV as a survivor, specifically. Like I mentioned, I LOSE followers every time I bring that stuff up. It doesn’t benefit me in any way whatsoever, in fact my notes tend to go comparatively radio silent for a good couple weeks after I go off on one of those jaunts, because idk, people don’t want THEIR mutuals and followers to think they agree with some of my oh so controversial stances?

Actually, I say idk, but I do know is the thing, because people actually go on anon and tell me they appreciate me posting stuff like this, and its like.....that....doesn’t actually make me feel good? Because I never expect any single person in particular to reblog me, but when I say crickets after I post on those topics, I mean CRICKETS. I’m lucky if I can get five reblogs on those posts in total, and those are usually all from the same people. It actually kinda sucks knowing that people agree with me and what I have to say there, but they won’t put it on their own blogs because this fandom is so fucking STEEPED in its views, they don’t want to risk their friendships or back-and-forths with certain popular fandom authors by rocking the boat.

Because meanwhile I’m making myself target practice for the people who really would like me to shut up on certain topics but are too cowardly to ever confront me directly about why they dislike what I have to say there, in the vain hope that other people might finally even just START to pass some of that on even for consideration....because I can make waves by myself just by being loud and consistent, but I can’t do shit to actually make CHANGE without other people agreeing in PUBLIC so that fandom is forced to confront the fact that no, certain opinions aren’t just one loud asshole being annoying, there’s an actual viewpoint here that people actually have in greater numbers than we realized and we DON’T have as much of a monopoly on this topic as we thought.

I have anons who give me shit accusing me of driving off certain authors by making this fandom not fun for them anymore, when like, I never even fucking INTERACTED with the authors in question. Some of the names I’m accused of driving off I don’t even KNOW. I’m called an ‘abusive survivor shaming cunt’ with zero irony or self-awareness that they’re literally doing the exact same thing because they don’t like the stance *I* take as a survivor posting about how ‘some survivors use dark fic/rape fantasy to cope’ shouldn’t be treated as a monolithic defense of such things if it leads directly into the same kind of survivor shaming other people view criticism of such fic as being in the first place.

I’ve had to unfollow mutuals because I post about how reblogging posts about purity culture is a direct fucking slap into the face to people like me whose stances on fandom culture are directly based on our own personal experiences and the intersection those have with various popular fandom takes.....like you don’t have to agree with all my takes obviously, but if you can’t see how framing a naive pursuit of ideological purity as the only possible reason people object to certain fandom trends when I’m literally standing right here saying no actually, the way these fandom trends impact me is the reason for me saying the things I say when I say “here’s how this fandom trend impacts me”.....like.....c’mon.

And I’ve had mutuals unfollow me because despite following me because they liked my takes on social justice issues THEY care about, I just ‘post too much about what’s really just a personal issue’ and has no larger social relevance whatsoever, obviously. LOL. (Oh and this of course has nothing to do with them getting friendly with various popular authors on discord, who happen to be vocal about ‘disapproving’ of any fic criticism whatsoever. Just FYI, there’s a reason I haven’t followed anyone new or made any new mutuals in like....a year. I have my reasons for being....not quick about that).

I get condescended to constantly about not minding the tags, and then radio silence when I list literal examples of ways in which people haven’t tagged things correctly, tagged things at all, or literally used the tags in an attempt TO trigger people they just don’t like.

And meanwhile, allllllll of this keeps happening while the general narrative is I’m this loud asshole guy with zero concern about anything but his own personal likes or dislikes and who makes fandom a negative place that’s unwelcoming in general. And with basically zero mention of all the ways in which I’ve contributed to this fandom, the amount of content I’ve made that has DIRECTLY inspired people, and the productive conversations I’ve started which have resulted in people actually changing the way they approach various characters or dynamics in fics.

Its THAT part that bugs me, specifically.

Look, I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again now.....I’m not anyone’s victim. Negative fandom interactions are negative fandom interactions. All this complaining I’m doing here - lol, that’s all it is. I’m venting. I’m pissed off and I think its relevant to a greater fandom dynamic or tendencies a lot of people unknowingly or consciously reinforce, and so I’m just fucking SAYING it because while its not something I EXPECT this post will do much to change, if at all, I would still like it to change so any effort towards that end is still better than no effort at all...hence, my posting this rather than bottling it up so at least people have it to consider.

If you don’t agree with it, if you don’t like that it exists at all, if it ruins your day to have to consider whether or not you or people you know or even like are active participants in what someone else is describing as y’know....fairly day-ruining in its own way? Hit that unfollow, that block, that make new text post button of your own and have your own rant about what a douchebag I am.

Literally all I’m trying to express is like.....fa*ndom’s got a lot to say about the stuff I have to say about fandom, but like....this is a two way interaction. A lot of people make a big deal about MY impact (again, JUST the negative though, lol) but I don’t ever see anyone ever addressing anyone else about hey maybe you could spare a thought or two about YOUR impact for a change as well.

I mean, what if....just maybe...what if.....a lot of my behavior or attitude has a lot to do with how people approach or talk about me BEFORE that display of attitude or certain behavior? Weirdly....I feel like maybe something that could then have a transformative effect on the kind of behavior or attitude people dislike from me....is.....them acknowledging or addressing things they might have done to prompt certain responses from me?

I don’t actually like being whiny or negative or down in general, just to be clear? If I see something I have a problem with or think could use change or improvement, I say so - but I pretty much always put an effort into expressing both WHY and HOW I think possible change could look - because I’m not generally interested in being negative for the sake of just being negative. I just....want things to be better. That’s not an obsession with purity or perfection, btw, I will NEVER understand how people think that survivors of rape and abuse (which include a lot more ‘antis’ than anyone else seems to want to acknowledge) and the like EVER expects perfection or thinks that the world will ever produce that - lol no I’m actually pretty clear that things being perfect is pointless, I’m just interested in BETTER.

But I mean, I like being goofy and silly and also analytical and contemplative and also creative and spontaneous. I like lots of things. I like lots of moods. I like producing, creating, generating, interacting, engaging, I like a million things more than I like THIS kind of mood, THIS kind of post.

But I’m just not someone who is content to sit and stew in that sort of thing when I know full well that the problem does not actually stem from something broken or flawed inside of me, because I’m also someone who does believe very strongly in periodic bouts of self-reflection and honest self-assessment.....so that I can change things about myself when and where I feel necessary. But this also has the effect of me also being VERY aware of when the problem is not internal, but actually just me having a perfectly valid reaction or emotional response to outside stimulus. Aka fandom’s interaction with me, every bit as much as my interaction with fandom.

So....posts like this. I’ll do my usual rituals, get myself back onto my preferred trains of thought soon enough on my own, because ultimately that is all I can control and just because I make posts like this doesn’t mean I ever EXPECT any specific result - or a result at all - to come from it.

But, y’know, sue me for being hopeful.

I know. What an ass am I?

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lancearcherinrippedjeans · 4 years ago

Text

Eternity

**********

I know some of you are probably like "What happened to ICBTE bro?" It's in the fanfic cemetery never to be spoken of again <3

But WELCOME to the new multi part fic Eternity where we follow OC's Veronica Rodriguez, Sawyer Holden and Nova Jay throughout their AEW career

**********

Starring - Tony Khan, Kenny Omega, WARHORSE and of course, the OCs (also a small appearance from Madi Wrenkowski )

Word Count - 2,385

Category - Fluff, friendship, mentions of past romance

Part 1/?

Summary - Sawyer, Veronica and Nova wanted nothing more than to "make it". When they have a chance to main event with TK and Kenny Omega sitting front row, how will it go?

other author's notes - keep in mind, me and @adriii-omega wrote this in a day. there might be spelling mistakes, it might not make sense, trust the process <3 and YES a good portion of this is the ACTUAL match.

**********

“Yes Bullet Club is for life, but we’re Eternity.”

“Nova, Veronica, Sawyer you’re on in 10!” The producer yelled, knocking on the door of the dressing room. Though it wasn’t a dressing room, more like a closet. “We’ll be there in a second, damn!” Yelled Sawyer, trying to get her gear on in the tiny corner.

“It would be nice if they gave us an actual dressing room like the guys or something.” Veronica mumbled, pulling on her gear pants. Nova and Sawyer agreed. There could be thousands of dressing rooms, but they always got stuck in a janitor’s closet. “Could you imagine all three of us in our own private dressing rooms?” Nova fantasized as she tied her left boot.

The group of three had always had dreams, as small as a dressing room, to as big as being on the greatest stage of them all. But for now, a janitor’s closet, a couple bucks a night, and a high school gym would satisfy them.

“I got extra tips at the diner today so we can go out to eat after the show this time.” Sawyer announced, smiling towards Veronica, who had just told Sawyer about her craving for a milkshake earlier that day. “Oh thank God, the family I babysat for today only paid nine bucks for FIVE hours.” Nova complained, touching up her makeup.

“Nine?!” “Yeah, spoiled little white kids, AGAIN.”

Veronica and Sawyer chuckled, walking out the janitor’s closet, Nova following close behind.

The three friends had so much in common, but were so different. Like Sawyer for example, the tallest of the three and by far the smartest. She wasn’t afraid to take a bump in front of 10 people or 10,000. She would do whatever it took to make sure she ended up as one of the best professional wrestlers of all time.

Veronica, one of the sweetest people you’ll ever meet. Most people would call her a submission specialist, but making someone tap was just all in a day's work for her. She’ll do anything to put on the most entertaining match anyone in the crowd has ever seen, even if it’s acting like she almost died.

Nova however, was definitely a person who was ready to put on a show, taunts, hyping up the crowd and “OMG” moments were her specialty. She has gotten injured doing those special moves, many times, but she always got back up and showed out to put on the best performance.

All three of them had a purpose and decided they would stick together to reach it.

The whole roster was fond of how close they were. Others envied their success on the independent scene - except one of their closest friends, Warhorse. He was going to be on Dynamite tomorrow` to challenge Cody for his TNT Championship, but tonight, he was at the show, watching the trio wrestle.

They were walking closer to the “stage”, when he stopped them. “You will not believe who’s here!” Sawyer groaned, “Jake you know I hate guessing games so can you jus-”

“Tony Khan and Kenny Omega.” Their jaws dropped. “THE owner and EVP OF AEW?” Nova questioned. Veronica’s palms started to get sweaty. “Why are they here? I don’t even want to be here; there is no way the ACTUAL Kenny Omega and Tony Khan are sitting in a high school gym.” She wiped her hands on her pants and crossed them over her chest. “You don’t believe me? Well you guys will see in about an hour or so.” Warhorse smirked.

“We’re going out now, dipshit.” Sawyer insulted. Nova and Veronica laughed, but Warhorse had more to say, “Didn’t you hear? You guys have been bumped to the main event since the rich guys are out there.”

Suddenly calm, cool and collected Sawyer had her jaw to the floor. “Sawyer?” Nova whispered, shaking her friend's shoulder. “I can’t fly high and be energetic for the last 30 minutes of the show! I’ll break something or pass out!”

Veronica giggled at her friend’s nonsense, “You’ll be fine. C’mon, let's go watch the matches.”

Nova, Veronica and Sawyer sat by a monitor, watching the last few matches before their main event match. They were enjoying some of the two newer wrestlers face off when a hand slammed down on a table. They looked up and saw Madi Wrenkowski, fuming.

“They CUT my match so you guys could have your dumb main event.”

Sawyer held back laughter while Veronica spoke up, “Well it’s not our fault, we didn’t find out till five minutes ag-” “You think you’ll be big cause of a few matches? No way. Just stick to the janitor’s closet.” Madi scoffed, storming off.

“A few 5 star matches to be fair!” Nova called out, receiving a high five from her friends. It had been like this for a while, Madi going off on how she was “better”, but mean girls were SO high school.

They all took a deep breath, knowing it was their time to main event.

When the three reached the gorilla position. They saw Warhorse standing by the curtain waiting for them. Everyone was pretty happy that they got the opportunity to perform for someone like Kenny Omega, but deep down inside Veronica, Sawyer, and Nova knew that they deserved to be in the main event spot a long time ago.

“You three are going to kill it.” Warhorse smiled at his friends. He wondered how cool it would be to see them all in AEW at one time. “Thanks Jake.” Nova said. Sawyer was standing at the curtain, waiting for her cue.

“Say, bitch, I don’t wanna talk.”

Realer by Megan Thee Stallion blasted off the gym walls. The couple hundred of fans there jumped out of their seats to show their love for Sawyer, though she wasn’t supposed to be having such a loud reaction. She walked down the entrance way stopping at a young child who had their hand out for a high five. Sawyer went over to make it seem like she was about to, but smoothly pushed her hair back instead- flipping off the parents as well. As she got in the ring she took a quick scan to look for Kenny and Tony. She spotted them front and center in the front row she gave a sly smirk and went to one of the corners of the ring.

“TOOONIGHTTTTT-“

Nova shot out of the curtain while 24K Magic by Bruno Mars played in the gym. The crowd was also feeling the song as they got up and grooved. Even Tony Khan was bobbing his head along. Nova walked down to the ring, pep in her step. She gave people in the crowd high fives and hugs. She entered the ring and tried to get Sawyer to dance along, but backed away when Sawyer stood over her, glaring and clenching her fists. She walked over to her corner, climbing up to the second turnbuckle, waving at the whole crowd.

“I fly with the stars in the skies…”

Veronica pushed her black shades on as she smoothly walked through the curtain as “Moment 4 Life” by Nick Minaj came on the speakers. It was a perfect song to describe how she felt as she took the audience in at the top of the ramp. Her swagger was untouched but when she stepped in front of Kenny Omega, she felt his eyes never leave her which made her confidence blast through the roof. She used the stairs to get in and leaned on the ropes and waved to the other people that were there.

The three stared each other down, “this is awesome” chants from the crowd already starting. The ref asked all of them if they were ready, then called for the bell to ring. They all circled around the ring, the crowd wondering who was gonna hit first. Nova started taunting the two, planning to get the crowd on her side early in the match.

Sawyer had enough and tackled Nova to the ground, throwing punches, keeping away from the head. Veronica pulled Sawyer off, Sawyer widened her eyes, Veronica irish whipped Sawyer into the ropes, clotheslining her as soon as she came back. Veronica turned at the crowd, cheering along with them, not paying attention that Sawyer just did a kip-up behind her.

Veronica turned around just to be met with a kick to the face. Veronica turned around once, swaying side to side before falling to the ground, selling coming in clutch.

Nova came up from behind Sawyer, drop kicking her and making her fall to the mat. They planned to live to the phrase “fight forever”. Nova walked towards Veronica, dragging her up. Veronica started to gain her consciousness back, kicking Nova in the legs and Nova dodging as many as she could.

While they weren’t paying attention, Sawyer crawled towards the corner, climbing up the top rope, getting in position for a frog splash. It wasn’t till the crowd started screaming till Veronica and Nova looked towards the corner, Sawyer jumping off and crashing into both of them.

She stood up, hyping herself up, looking towards TK and Kenny, smirking.

*match skip*

Sawyer, Veronica, and Nova all struggled to get to their feet trying to use each other for balance. It had at least been 25 minutes of non stop action, and everyone was on the edge of their seat. Sawyer threw a punch in Veronica’s direction , but she attempted to counter it with an arm bar bringing her down to the mat. Nova saw the opportunity as she started to climb to one of the top turnbuckles. With Sawyer’s strength she manages to deliver a powerbomb to Veronica getting out of the arm bar. She crouched in the corner as Nova hit a devastating Macho Man like elbow drop.

1…

2…

But Sawyer broke up the pin by pulling Nova’s leg. Nova slapped Sawyer making Sawyer deliver a right hand back but harder, making her roll out the ring and on the apron. Veronica was slowly getting back up and Sawyer noticed as she charged towards her, making Veronica pull the top rope making her land on the outside. Veronica made her way to the apron where Nova was at; her back turned to Veronica not seeing her jump and wrap her legs around her neck for a reverse hurricanrana. With a loud thud, both of them rolled onto the floor in pain.

Sawyer crawled over , throwing Veronica in the ring and seeing Nova began to stir. Sawyer climbed to the top turnbuckle with her back turned to deliver a perfect moonsault, making the crowd gasp, and Tony and Kenny to stand up. Sawyer held her side, and rolled into the ring ready to finish the match. She stood in the ring, waiting for Veronica to get in position for her finishing move. Veronica stood and it was too late, and she tucked her chin ready for the impact of Sawyer’s devastating Canadian Destroyer.

1…

2…

Sawyer stood up, referee raising her arm in the air. She tried to bite back her smile but simply couldn’t. She watched as Veronica and Nova started to walk backstage, exiting the ring, breaking out of character as soon as she was behind the curtain.

Veronica, Nova and Sawyer started talking about the match, complimenting each other. “Excuse me ladies?” They looked over, and saw Tony Khan and Kenny Omega walking towards them. Nova spun around and almost caused Sawyer and Veronica to fall over. “Really impressive match out there. You know I didn’t think you guys would have met my expectations but I was way wrong.” Kenny admitted, and Tony agreed. “Yea , we would really love for you guys to come over to our company for a bit. Not on Dynamite yet, but some Dark matches maybe?” Tony suggested. They were beyond excited. Sawyer started imagining all of the memories she could create at AEW, and seeing some people she hadn’t seen in a while - until a certain person popped into her head. “I would love to wrestle for you guys, but does Wardlow know? Or is he even okay with this- “ Veronica gave Sawyer the death stare and Nova let out a laugh. “Wardlow? He’s the one that brought you guys up. He said you were all really talented, and since we’re looking for more women wrestlers you were the right people. Is there something going on between…” “NO.” Sawyer interrupted Tony.

“It’s complicated. I just wanted to make sure he was okay with working with me again.” Nova couldn’t believe Sawyer’s actions and it was making it extremely hard not to burst out of laughter on the spot. Veronica stood in between her friends listening closely to what Khan was saying. She felt eyes on her so she looked up and was met with Kenny’s soft stare. He smiled and looked away making her do the same.

“Yea, so tomorrow I was thinking you guys could get to Jacksonville and see Dynamite, then wrestle after the show?” Tony said. “That works fine with us.” Nova said, smiling wide

“Great!” Kenny said, smiling at Veronica. “Sawyer, Veronica?”

Sawyer and Veronica looked at each other, they could tell what they both were thinking just by the looks on their face. Veronica nodded, Sawyer spoke up, “Let’s do this.” “That’s great, the flight leaves at 11 tonight, so get there as fast as you can,” Tony said, looking at his phone, “Oh and Sawyer?”

Sawyer looked up, “Don’t interrupt me again.”

Nova couldn’t keep in her laughter anymore, not even when Veronica punched her arm and told her to shush. Tony and Kenny left the building, leaving the friends beaming and damn near tears. “Veronica and Kenny sitting in a tree!” Nova and Sawyer started to sing, making Veronica roll her eyes, “Yeah I’ll remember that when we see Wardlow tomorrow.”

Sawyer huffed. “But remember we promised if things ever ended up like this, we would stay together no matter what happens between any of us.” Nova brought up, talking about the promise they all made years before.

“Friends, no matter what.” They all said in unison, knowing in the back of their heads they would be friends for eternity.

thank you for reading! part 2 coming soon!

#tony khan #kenny omega #kenny omega x reader #kenny omega x oc #aew #aew fanfiction #aew x reader #all elite wrestling #warhorse #wardlow #wrestling fanfiction

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