#(narrator: she was - in fact - a whole kingdom away from fine)

[iceinherheart-kissonherlips]

“That old reflex never died; the little pang of Don't go, just stay. Settle over me like the tide, cover me like a blanket, wrap around me like the sun. 

Don't go, don't go, don't go.” [x]

[hoodlessmads]

Dark Heir spoiler thoughts:

Okay some of these are criticisms but please understand I really liked it! I liked it even more than Dark Rise. I’m just an overdramatic person and need to yell sometimes.

These don’t have any particular order, I’m just freestyling -

Reading Captive Prince years ago (and rereading since) before reading Dark Rise made me have an unfair resentment towards James for being basically the same character as Laurent but not as good and that continued here

Will is the second best character Pacat has ever made after Laurent and book 3 might push him ahead

I loved seeing Will use more and more of his evil powers

The best one being where he possesses anyone with a brand and his eyes turn black and he turns into Legion (maybe shoulda turned that off before trying to appeal to Violet…)

Finding out his mom actually was tying him to bedposts and beating him this whole time somehow shocked me because for some silly reason I believed one of the most unreliable third person subjective narrators ever, Will, that she was a nice lady just doing her best. Anyway I love this revelation because it makes such perfect sense, it’s just, “Oh. Of course.”

Violet and Cyprian are both himbos yet Violet is somehow the only character with a single brain cell left at the end of the book

Cyprian drinking from the cup makes no sense after they had a whole discussion in the first book about how drinking from the cup put the Stewards into the Dark King’s plans and made them his thralls and was the entire reason they died, a massacre which Cyprian experienced viscerally, and then he goes and drinks from the cup anyway and oops surprise Will can in fact enthrall him. Cyprian is able to fight it off but that doesn’t change the complete recklessness and out-of-character-ness of it to me.

Violet/Cyrprian is a good ship

Phillip/Visander is hilarious (in a good way)

Will/James is fine but I wish I was more compelled by them than I actually am. For being the main couple, I don’t feel like their relationship has been given the room it needed to develop organically and instead it feels like we’re falling back on physical attraction and a vague shadow of a past relationship in the old world that we didn’t get to see. It’s hard not to compare to Damen/Laurent which by contrast was developed so painstakingly.

Elizabeth is incredible

Visander sucks, actually

The whole Light kind of sucks. The Stewards, the Sun Kingdom, they were all assholes

People with black-and-white morality are truly terrible, aren’t they? And pretty much everyone is like that except for Will, James, and Violet

Sometimes I felt like that fact was really being hammered in on purpose almost as though to make James murdering like 300 people seem less bad (but it didn’t….)

But I don’t dislike James because he murdered 300 people, I actually love villains and I especially am attached to the idea of everyone being redeemable. But what I don’t like is the book telling me I should like James without giving me a good reason or the book downplaying his actions to make him seem more sympathetic. He can have murdered all the Stewards and still be compelling, we don’t need to diminish what he’s done in order for him to be likable

Also everyone in this book except like, Will and maybe Violet and James is an idiot (and I’ll excuse Elizabeth for only being ten). Someone send these characters to Psych 101, they don’t seem to understand the concept of a self-fulfilling prophecy…

Like obviously if you tell someone they’re evil over and over again for their whole lifetime they will become evil

Theory - I don’t think Violet will turn on Will. I think she’s just shell-shocked. She wasn’t really given a chance to take a stance before James Peter Panned him away. Violet knows exactly what it feels like to be told you are evil because of some past thing, and she knows Will better than any of the other characters. And she knows that morality is not black and white (Tom is her brother). She’ll definitely end up in Will’s corner by the end.

Theory - The line of the Lady and the line of the Dark King are the same bloodline and they split off later. Sarcean’s “cataclysmic night together” with the Lady was mentioned not once but twice. Pacat doesn’t waste lines. The child that the Lady had was Sarcean’s, or at least one of them.

Will better figure out how to destroy that collar quick…before they both get even more traumatized. I think that will be one of his main goals in book 3. Or I hope…otherwise it will be hard to develop the genuine romance

I sure hope Will can also figure out how to expel that shadow from Cyprian before he like… dies. Don’t do that to Violet D:

So, I’m not a huge fan of YA in general (outside of YA anime and manga which for some reason hits different). I used to like it a lot, it used to be most of what I read. I grew up reading series like Redwall, Darren Shan, Demonata, Pendragon, and so on. But I’ve grown out of the genre (I’m 27). Not every adult does - one of my best friends who is a year older than me still really enjoys YA. But because I don’t like YA, I think my enjoyment of Dark Rise/Dark Heir is influenced and my criticisms may be unfair.

But I find that with fantasy series like this, I the books really need to be longer. Or there needs to be more of them. I feel like Dark Rise has so many moving pieces, enough characters that there could be a trading card game (and there are literally collectible cards), so many different magical artifacts and magical powers, an entire magical old world beneath the semi-magical 1820s Europe world to develop, and also by the way a whole story that took place 10,000 years ago that has to be told at some point. I find myself feeling like all these different elements are being introduced and moved on from too fast and I wish they were all given more time to breathe. I think that’s part of why the relationship between Will and James feels a bit rushed to me. I don’t know if the short length of the series was Pacat’s choice or an editor’s, though. I don’t feel like Captive Prince had this issue because there were no supernatural elements, the cast was much smaller, and the plot was comparably simple so a lot of it got to be characters just talking to each other, which was great, and the world building was accomplished mainly through these interactions. The plot and world of Dark Rise is much larger in scope but the page count is the same (a little longer maybe).

So wait who is Mrs. Duval

Why did Ettore leave the Stewards anyway? Other than the obvious, which is that they suck

Where was Grace during the whole ending scene? Wasn’t she there but just not saying anything. As this total calamity befalls her only remaining friend group she finally has seen too much and just nopes out and is busy making tea in the corner or maybe popcorn

I do really like Cyprian btw in spite of thinking his moral code is shitty. Gave Violet a chance but sold Will for one corn chip… I see how it is (okay that’s not fair but you know what I mean, he has flaws)

It sounds like I’m in the majority when I say that I still don’t like Devon - I saw that theory about him being the final big bad and I’m so on that train. I think he’d make a good enough final villain. I agree there is something predatory about him and Tom. I don’t necessarily think Pacat wants us to root for them as a couple, though. There were better ways to pull that off if that was the intent.

Not to repeat myself but Phillip was such a pleasant surprise. Like who is this fruit and how did he get here

So next book, I hope (assume) we get to see the rest of the old world story filled in so we can understand where it all went wrong for Sarcean and also the exact nature of his relationship with Anharion because so far it’s been quite vague (intentionally I assume). Like….. you know….. did he agree to put on the collar?

The tricky thing about this series is that once the reader learns that Will is the Dark King, it’s hard to maintain any sort of external tension. Right? It’s hard to feel afraid of the forces of the Dark when the protagonist has total effortless control over them just by virtue of who he is. Will can literally just be like, “No, don’t” and everything’s fine. He did just this at the end of Dark Rise. I find the way Dark Heir seems to end with their “only hope of stopping the Dark army” destroyed to be pretty unconvincing. Why on earth would Sarcean create a destructible object that is the only way of controlling his own army? Of course Will should be able to control them with his will alone. If he can control Shadow Kings and make them die with his words alone, why didn’t he try yelling at the shadow army to stop trying to possess people? This doesn’t make sense to me. And if people become Returners through his magic, shouldn’t he be able to exert some control over their existence the way he does with the branded? Pacat has done a good enough job at getting us to know Sarcean (an extremely good job btw) so as to make the destroyed brand plot point unbelievable. Anyway…

Instead, the tension in Dark Heir is almost entirely internal or realized in character relationships rather than physical threats. The tension is between Will and himself, and between Will and his friends. (There are tensions between other characters but focusing on the main plot here.) The possibility that they might find out and abandon him, and the possibility that he might actually be as nasty of a guy as Sarcean was, the slim chance that he might learn something that makes him go, “You know what, I agree with my past self after all.”

Now that everyone has found out who he is, that particular source of tension has sort of evaporated, so now in book 3 Pacat has to find a way to make Will’s conflict with himself and his friends compelling enough to carry us through 450 pages (I don’t expect this will be difficult). What I see as the problems now are 1) what was Sarcean actually planning and how did he plan on getting Will (himself) to fall in line with them (this was a question in Dark Heir as well but now it’s bigger), 2) how is Will going to destroy his own (Sarcean’s) Dark artifacts so he can free James, and 3) Can he convince anyone to ever love him (oh no ouch).

If I had to rank these books at this stage I’d probably give Rise a 3.7 ish…. and Heir a 4.2. I’m holding out for Dark King to be a 5 or close. (I don’t know what the actual title will be, I’m just guessing lol.) I definitely think Dark Heir is an improvement over Dark Rise since I always thought the most interesting part of the latter by far was everything that happened once Will learns he is the Dark King at the very end.

“Are we going to talk about the magic pseudo-sex scene—“ No and I hope we never will

[emilyhufflepufftlk]

Review of Seven Kings Must Die

I feel like people are going to have mixed feelings towards this film, however I really liked it and I think it did a good job within the constraints it had. Could it have been better as a whole season? Probably. But I think it was still a fitting way to end TLK.

Overall an 8.5/10 from me. I have written a very detailed review (lots of spoilers!!!!) under the cut. It is perhaps too detailed - I got carried away lol.

First things first, I loved the opening credits with the extended title sequence. Loved that it incorporated the original title art alongside movie specific sequences. Also the fact that the music started off different and then went into the iconic TLK theme was great, signalling that the film is both it's own thing and part of the TLK story. I have always loved the way they use the titles as a storytelling device, like how they changed it for season 5 to make Northumbria the 'last kingdom' rather than Wessex, so I thought changing it to have the burning start in Ireland, Scotland, Isle of Man etc where the 'kings' in the film were from was really effective. Maybe it's the nerd in me, but I love these kind of details.

Finan doing the voice over was interesting as we've never had anyone else but Uhtred do the narration. It gave a different perspective from what we usually get which was cool. I also like to think that this was Finan telling the story of how Uhtred made England happen after Uhtred's death (I know it was left opened ended, but I personally think Uhtred did go to Valhalla at the end) which is cool as Uhtred always said he would live on in the songs his men will tell of him (thinking about his dialogue with Alfred in 3.09).

I was fine with Ingrith having the 'prophesy'. Yes it kind of came out of nowhere but it didn't really matter - by that I mean if she had not had the vision nothing would have changed, Uhtred was not acting on her advice or took real heed of it, in fact he shrugged it off. Having the prophesy gave us extra intrigue and the twist that 'the woman you love' was directed at Finan and she was the one to die was surprising and I thought well done. I did like that it was the sons of kings that died rather than the kings themselves, especially after the kings talked about how having an heir meant their kingdoms would live on.

In terms of the new characters, I cannot say they were particularly memorable (with the exception of Ingilmundr who I will talk about later). We did not get much of a chance to get to know them which is to be expected due to time constraints. I personally didn't mind this as I think most movies have a similar problem so I am used to it. I think the kings served their role for the plot and I was fine with not knowing much about them. Same for the Danes, they served their purpose plot wise. It would have been nice to have a bit more focus on Astrid (the Dane's daughter who spied on the Saxons) but I'm not that fussed about it.

Onto Ingilmundr - I thought he was an excellent antagonist. He was everything Aethelhelm was trying to be. I think with Aethelhelm in season 5, he felt a bit too much like a comic book villain to me, I kept expecting him to break out into cackles of evil laughter. But Ingilmundr felt more real and I thought the actor's performance was very good. He was manipulative without being too obvious. I also liked how he was the opposite of Uhtred - born Dane, taught Saxon ways and eventually betraying them for the people of his birth (just like how Uhtred was born Saxon, grew up Dane, but in the end chose to serve Saxon kings).

I was pleased that they gave Aethelstan a male lover as I believe it's referenced in the books (I have not read them personally) and I didn't know if Netflix had the balls to do it. I think it added to the manipulation and helped to explain why Aethelstan was so easily influenced by him (as I feel like Aethelstan genuinely cared for/loved him). It also makes the sense of betrayal on Aethelstan's part greater and I thought that was portrayed well.

In terms of Aethelstan in general, I think the writer's did a good job building him up to be the antagonist in the beginning third of the film. Him killing his brother in cold blood after the surrender clearly signalled he'd changed from who we met in season 5 and showed how Ingilmundr influenced him. Killing Aldhelm really shocked me and made me SOB (especially how he went calmly and accepted his fate). As much as I hated to see Aldhelm die as he had grown to become one of my favourite characters over the course of the series, I think his death was effective. It showed that Aethelstan had gone mad from paranoia and how lost he rally was, both to the audience and the characters - it's only when Uhtred sees Aldhelm's body does he realise what Aethelstan is capable of and realises he isn't the young man he had raised.

The change from Aethelstan being an antagonist to siding with Uhtred was a little abrupt and could have been done better over the course of a whole season, but I still thought it worked. Harry Gilby did a good job with the scenes he had, from the denial when Uhtred first tells him of Ingilmundr's betrayal to the acceptance and guilt when he discovers the truth.

The attack on Bebbanburg and the killing of Ingrith and the rest of the people was gut wrenching but thinking about it in hindsight I wonder what purpose it served? They would have still gone to look for their sons regardless. I guess it made Uhtred feel totally defeated and maybe alerted them to the immediate danger but I feel like it wasn't necessary. Ingrith's death destroyed me, mainly because of Mark's acting - that man knows how to sell an emotional scene! His scream and the sobbing was soul destroying. However, what really took me out of this moment was wondering where the hell Sihtric's wife and kids are? I guess they no longer exist?

There were lots of characters that were absent without explanation. This always happens when a series with a whole range of characters developed over many seasons have to condense down into a two hour film - it happened with Downton Abbey, although I feel like the writers of the Downton movie at least gave missing characters reasons for not being there. I didn't care so much about Hild or Eadith as much as I love them as I don't see what role they would have played in the plot anyway, but I feel like they should have at least explained Stiorra's absence as it feels odd she didn't come to Uhtred/Bebbanburg's aid if she had been able to.

I liked the introduction of Osbert and Edmund, although we didn't get much of them. I don't think there was time in the movie to address the whole 'Uhtred abandoning Osbert for most of his childhood' and I guess there has been a big enough time jump to assume they have worked out their differences. I also liked the fact Osbert protected and trained Edmund, it feels like it's carrying on the legacy of Uhtred teaching and protecting Edward.

I was glad that Eadgifu's characterisation was the same as in season 5 despite the change in actress. Her friendship with Uhtred was a surprise but worked well.

We didn't get a whole lot of Finan and Sihtric which was sad but was what I expected. There really wasn't time for side plots which means Finan's past is reserved for fanfic alone. I did like how they inferred Finan was getting older (falling asleep, sore arse etc) which at least acknowledges the fact that these guys should be like 80 by now lmao.

As always in TLK they travelled across the country in what seemed like no time at all - however I feel like although we didn't get extended scenes of them travelling places, the length of time it takes to get to places was acknowledged: when they get to the cave where the residents of Bebbanburg were imprisoned, it's said that Ingrith last spoke three days before they got there, which at least signals that time has passed since Uhtred left and not five seconds like it feels in the movie.

Something both the movie and Season 5 did was show the barbarity of the Christians. I feel like in previous seasons it was always presented as the Danes being the savages that rape and pillage and leave destruction in their wake, whilst in Season 5 we saw in the massacre at Rumcofa Christians doing the murdering and we saw it again here with them slaughtering everyone in Aegelesburg even after they surrendered and the burning of the Scottish settlements etc. I think this gives the show more nuance and makes it less black and white.

The end battle was epic. I loved that it was a return to the standard shield wall which was so iconic in the series but I feel like they moved away from in seasons 4 and 5. The tactics of moving them around so they could attack them from behind was clever, especially as I didn't realise that was what they were doing. The putting down of spikes in front of them was also such a cool idea. The whole battle reminded me a lot of Ethendun and so it feels like we've come full circle. I really thought Pyrlig was going to be another Leofric, but he miraculously survived yet again. Honestly I think this man is invincible - he's been stabbed TWICE, tortured, walked for miles and been through numerous battles. I love Pyrlig so I'm not complaining lol.

I thought Uhtred was going to die laying on the battlefield. I can't decide if I would have preferred him going down with a blaze of glory on the battlefield rather than the ending we got, but it was still emotional seeing him fight on whilst bleeding out. Sihtric and Finan finding him afterwards also made me tear up.

Uhtred seeing the feast hall of Valhalla with his friends laughing together was very emotional and I really liked it. It would have been nice to have seen Young Ragnar, Gisela and Thyra (although maybe Thyra is in heaven with Beocca) there alongside them but I know the actors were probably unavailable.

The fact that they don't specify if Uhtred lived or died was clever, especially with Finan's voice over saying that the chronicles didn't record his fate. It ties into this idea that Uhtred was written out of history, again linking back to his dialogue with Alfred in 3.09. I like the idea that we can pretend that the events in TLK did happen, that the Uhtred we know did exist, just it wasn't included in the chronicles.

I loved that the ending shot was modern Bambrugh castle, showing that the thing Uhtred fought so hard for lives on. Bebbanburg was such an important part of the show; even in Season 3 when we don't go to Bebbanburg at all, it still looms over the show and everything Uhtred does. It's also integrally linked to Uhtred's 'destiny' and as we know 'destiny is all'. The way the camera pans away in that final shot reminds me a bit of the last shot of Season 5 which ties the endings together.

Overall, I really enjoyed it and I thought it was done well. As always with TLK the costumes, hair and makeup, stunts, fight scenes and music were awesome. The crew really outdid themselves. I do think that it would have benefitted from having a bit more space to expand on certain plot points and it would have been more effective as a whole season, however, I am really glad we got this movie and saw the creation of England which (alongside Uhtred reclaiming Bebbanburg) has always been the biggest theme running through the series.

I can't believe TLK is really over. I might cry. I will miss it dearly.

[libertyreads]

Book Review #141 of 2023--

Falling Kingdoms by Morgan Rhodes. Rating: 3.5 stars.

Read from December 13th to 16th.

I'm going to start this review by saying that I'm conflicted about continuing this series. It came out over a decade ago and you can definitely tell. But there's something about it where I can tell a lot of the plot beats ahead of time yet there are moments when I think I know where the story is going and it diverts in a different direction. If I had read the series when it first came out, I would have been utterly obsessed. But as someone who has read a lot more now than I had a decade ago and as someone who is reading a kind of dated piece of fiction...it's less obsession worthy. If you've read this series and have an opinion about me reading further, let me know if I should dive in. (I will note that if I DO in fact decide to read the next book I will be getting it from my library.)

I like that we're in a sort of chaotic political situation in this novel. It has entanglements that you normally wouldn't see in a YA SFF novel from 2012. And I like that these characters we're following are the ones who are going to have to make the political choices moving forward eventually. We see a lot of moment even in this first novel of pieces being put into place for a big shift in the rest of the series. The characters were mostly fine. I enjoyed Magnus more than I was probably supposed to. We have this sort of emotionally broken boy with a tragic history who is pretty morally grey. That's like the recipe for a favorite character for me. What do you want me to do? Not have them be my favorite? I think Lucia is a bit vapid which I'm hoping gets rectified as she has to use more of her magic and has to see more horrific things happen in this war. I was rooting for Cleo for most of the novel and I DID see her falling in love with her guard coming from a mile away--rooting for it the whole time.

But a major downside for me was that I never felt that emotionally connected to the characters. It felt like the narrator keeps the reader at arm's length and I don't ever like that in a novel. It made it hard to care at times. I wanted to see emotional development between the characters that wasn't there, especially in the early chapters. I didn't even really believe that Cleo could have fallen in love with her guard based on what was seen on the page. If the author had written in all of the developmental stuff and all of the emotional stuff that I would have wanted, we would be looking at a book that's at least another 75, maybe 100, pages longer. I know I always harp about wanting books to be longer but it felt so necessary here.

Overall, it was fun for what it was and I could see myself possibly enjoying the rest of the series in the future as we get to know the characters better and see them interact more.

[lochnessies]

I feel like 3H discourse gets fucked over a bit by people not taking into account that characters will say inaccurate information (without it having to be a plot hole). Perspective is a huge theme in Three Houses and characters are going to make, sometimes, dramatic actions based off that misinformation.

yeah

Like, Dmitri accuses Edelgard of being involved in the Tragedy of Duscur, but, she was like, 12 when that happened. It’s a lot more likely that Edelgard was being experimented on or recovering from experimentation during that point in time considering that the Tragedy happens not long after Edelgard and Dmitri last see each other.

do i think edelgard was involved? nah. it’s one of the few things i genuinely believe her on. however, it isn’t unreasonable for dimitri to think she was somehow involved. i mean, faerghast is pretty standard medieval when it comes down to fighting. was sent to quell rebellions at like 14. that’s really young. and in the middle ages the standard age that boys trained to be nights was at the very least seven (glenn was 15 when he was full on knighted). felix says he learned to fight before he could write his own name and dimitri was already swinging swords at nine. not to mention she was in the kingdom and then not long after she leaves the tragedy happened. so it could also look like she was a spy even if she didn’t set lambert on fire herself.

then there’s the whole shit of her saying nothing. a whole nation gets wiped out and she has no plans to ever vindicate them. hell, even dedue says that her being involved in any way is unacceptable and he’s fucking pissed. is he delusional? is he being irrational and unfair to edelgard? she isn’t the victim here, dedue, his people, the kingdom royals and co. are.

Likewise, Setheth accuses Edelgard of trying to become a false goddess when that’s not even remotely close to her goals.

ok this part right here is the reason that this fucking thing took forever to come out (sorry anon). i have so much to say and i wanted to write it all but i decided to put in my edelgard essay instead. i then waited to post this answer but sadly it’s taking longer to edit than i planned and i feel bad so you’re going to have to wait for this bit. so if you stick around i’ll talk about that in depth in the essay but just know that i disagree with the op very much.

Edelgard makes a ton of false accusations and misconceptions about Rhea. She accuses Rhea of being a power hungry inhumane tyrant who has no regard for life outside her own when that just isn’t remotely accurate.

And then there’s Claude, literally the only major faction leader that cares to uncover the truth and nuances of everyone’s decisions. He’s literally the only faction leader to not act like his version of events is the definitive truth. He acknowledges that he and Edelgard are fighting for similar things: a system overhaul of Fodlan. He also doesn’t oppose the Church because he’s learned enough about it to want to keep it’s institution in place. That’s why he’s the only faction leader that can survive in every route (I’d consider Seteth and Rhea to share the role as Church Leader since Seteth leads the Church Route but Rhea’s the one actually in charge of the Church). Claude is also the only leader that doesn’t make any false claims about other factions. I said a while ago that Claude would make the best ruler and this is why.

ok this is fine

But going back to what I said earlier about discourse, this impacts discourse drastically because people can just pick whichever version of events they prefer and there’s probably a character who claimed it went that way. The plot also doesn’t seek to clarify events one way or the other in any route. So even if you’ve played every route, it’s up to the player to make judgment calls on who’s speaking out of their ass.

except it’s literally not. we are told what routes have correct information from the devs themselves. and unreliable narrators can be proven and disproven when you put their words against everyone else, their actions, and the lore.

Between all the relevant character and plot details the game hides behind supports, endings, and other easily missable content and the fact that no two characters interpret the series of events that happen in the plot the same way (due to coming from various background, being present for some stuff but not others, having different priorities and biases that will cause them to interpret different things in different ways, etc.), no two players are likely going to interpret the events of 3 Houses the same either.

just because two characters interpret the events differently doesn’t mean they’re right. for example, the agarthans think the crest experiments are good but edelgard and lysithea would say otherwise. but you wouldn’t say that twsitd’s perspective is valid just bc they see things differently.

and when i see players trying to excuse some of the most horrific things bc they don’t want their fave war criminal to look bad yes i will judge them. you can like whoever but don’t excuse shit like imperialism and racism and we will be fine.

So, if you want to talk 3H, please acknowledge that none of the characters should be taken solely on their word, especially when describing major things. With the examples I gave earlier of misinformation in the game, it makes sense that Dmitri would place the blame of the Tragedy of Duscur almost entirely on Edelgard because he doesn’t know about the Agarthans or Edelgard’s history with them.

ok but she’s still complicate if nothing else. that’s still terrible. like if she was planning to clear duscur’s name that’s one thing but she isn’t. the only way to do that is to reveal twsitd and we know she doesn’t since it is a shadow war that the people don’t know about since that would reflect badly on her for working with them.

It makes sense that Edelgard has a lot of misconceptions about the Church because once you start completely rewriting and erasing history (and the Church does openly censor literature, which is shown in Claude’s route), any possible “true story” is more likely than the story you’re giving. Alongside that, Edelgard is getting most of her information from the Agarthans and a very private source only accessible to the Imperial Family.

fair but choosing war at like 13 is an extreme jump. maybe wait till your brain fully develops and you have a better picture of the world around you

It makes sense that Seteth might assume that Edelgard is trying to become a false god because he’s been helping lead a religion based on lies for centuries.

she is. also the religion isn’t based off of lies. sothis exists. she’s in your head. a few details were changed to hide nabateans from a red canyon massacre 2.0. however, the values are the same. also he came to the monastery 20 years ago not centuries.

When you’re trying to understand some part of Three Houses, you have to think about where that information came from, what factors might be biasing that information, and that there might be some detail that shines a new light on that information somewhere else in the game that you’re missing. And that’s generally a good philosophy to have when processing any information.

yeah

That’s something I like about Three Houses. I like how you have to sort through a ton of biases and misinformation within the game to understand the story. If you let your own biases get away from you too much, you’re going to miss the larger picture. The game let’s you know exactly where everyone is coming from in some way and (almost) everyone is given a sympathetic eye in at least one route. And (almost) everyone is viewed as irredeemable in at least one route.

the only people who are portrayed as irredeemable are edelgard and rhea (and maybe dimitri if you count edel’s contempt for him in cf).

[fanficflaneuse]

One Day - Part 7

A/N: Dear magical tumblr friends, today I have not much to say but an expression of my gratitude for your comments, hearts and reblogs. I really wasn’t expecting many people to like what I write. So, it does come as a surprise, one that’s very pleasing and leaves a fuzzy feeling inside me :)

Details: 

Draco x reader (she/her pronouns) Word count: 2165

Summary: One day AU. Post-war. Since The Battle of Hogwarts, Draco and y/n meet one day a year.

Masterlist 

Enjoy! 

3 May, 2005

(Y/N) and Draco stood in front of each other, unsure of what to say or do. The muffled sounds of the celebration inside only made their silence heavier. They were in the garden of Ginny and Harry’s new home. Their housewarming party was the first time they met in two years.

Ginny had given birth to their firstborn, James Sirius, in August. With the newest Potter in tow, they decided their little flat in London was not the right place to raise their growing family and moved to a house in Devon. It was closer to the Burrow and had a huge back yard for their mischievous nine-months-old boy. That Tuesday night, (Y/N) had knocked on the door expecting a very adult reunion with her closest friends. She was greeted by a full-blown party. The music was deafening and there was a thick smell of booze in the air.

She greeted her friends, unaware of the grey eyes fixed on her from across the room. Draco was determined not to let another day pass. Two years had gone by since he last saw her and even more since they had truly enjoyed each other’s company. He wanted her back.

“(Y/L/N) is truly like fine wine,” Draco’s gaze shifted to Blaise, his eyebrows knitting in confusion.

“How so?” he asked carefully, guessing he really didn’t want to know the answer to that.

“As years go by, she just gets better and better,” Blaise answered, a sly smile on his face.

Draco gulped. He couldn’t deny that every time he saw (Y/N) she seemed much more beautiful than before. Whenever he had the pleasure of rediscovering her, he’d find something new to…well, love. He hadn’t had that chance in the last two years, so the effect she had on him now, even across the room, was tenfold.

“I can’t believe she’s still single.” That was Draco’s cue to stand up. He didn’t want to listen to anyone talking about his best friend in such terms. Guided by a rush, he walked towards her, interrupting her conversation with Hermione and Neville.

At first, (Y/N) thought she was hallucinating. She looked at him from head to toe, admiring the cool and kind energy that emanated from him. He was a breath of fresh air, one she had been missing for almost five years now. Then, (Y/N) noticed how, standing silently as they were, they attracted people’s attention. Pansy and Hermione looked at them intrigued. Harry was offering them a kind smile. Ron and Ginny were most definitely scoffing. Her friends’ antics made her realize she was not imagining him; Draco was standing right in front of her.

She didn’t doubt for a second when he asked her to talk privately.

That’s how they had gotten there, standing solemnly on the veranda with tears in their eyes. After a few minutes of doubting, (Y/N) inched forward and hugged Draco’s middle, burying her face on his chest. Draco smiled, relieved, and hugged her back. He pressed kisses on the top of her head.

“I missed you so much, Dray,” she said.

“Me too, (Y/N/N). You have no idea how much I’ve missed you,” he answered, bringing her closer to his chest.

A friendship was reborn.  They sat side by side on the porch, their backs to the house. They allowed themselves to be pulled towards each other, so their bodies were as pressed together as they could possibly be.  

“Don’t you want to let off steam? I’m here, you can roast me, insult me, call me on my behaviour. Really, nothing can possibly be worse than what I’ve said to myself,” even if Draco tried to press a humorous tone in his voice, (Y/N) could feel the regret and shame.

“Dray…for the longest time I thought about barging into Malfoy Manor to give you a piece of my mind. I wanted to insult you. Circe! At times I even thought about hexing you to kingdom come. I am not going to lie, I was hurt,” as she said all of this, she noticed how Draco’s face dropped, “but I’ve forgiven you. I’m not going to pretend like things didn’t happen. But I also prefer not to dwell on them.”

Draco then told her he had been sober for almost two years. He explained that their meeting had been a wakeup call and he decided he didn’t want to be that prick ever again. He told her, excitedly, that he had started healer training and he felt he had finally found his true calling. (Y/N) genuinely rejoiced at this. Draco then described his chance encounter with Harry at a muggle tea shop. They rekindled their friendship almost immediately and met every Wednesday evening for afternoon tea. This fact made her giggle like a lunatic.

He also narrated, just for the pleasure of hearing her laugh again, how Ginny went ballistic when he first set foot on their house.

“Well, it wasn’t undeserved. You were a git,” she teased. Draco nodded, feeling a bit guilty.

“What I’m wondering is,” she added, her dashing smile leaving her face, “why didn’t you reach out to me, Dray.”

Draco squeeze (Y/N)’s hands. “Don’t think I didn’t try, (Y/N/N). I did. Many times, actually. I just couldn’t bring myself to do it. I know I hurt you for some very stupid reasons. I even asked Harry and Ginny – and Ron and Hermione and everyone else, basically – not to tell you about me because I wanted to contact you myself. And then I just couldn’t…I…”

“It’s okay, Dray,” she consoled him, like many times before, by putting her hands on his cheeks and making him face her. They stared at each other for what seemed like an eternity, they gave each other that look of longing and lust that begs to be ended by a kiss. But before either of them leaned in, Draco reminded himself of the many, many reasons why it was not okay for them to kiss. I’m not that imbecile any more, he told himself.

“So, tell me about you. What have you been doing lately,” he said, ending abruptly their little moment.

(Y/N) blushed and fixed her gaze on the sky. She shared with him something nobody else knew: she was going to publish her first book. Draco was so happy for her – and for the fact that she had told him first – that he almost cried. She then explained how things were going spectacularly at her job. Once again, he hanged onto her every word as she poured so much passion into what she was saying. For some reason, (Y/N) mentioned her breakup with Ernie.

“I figured as much when he arrived holding hands with Cho,” he murmured. He didn’t say that MacMillan hadn’t even returned his greeting and had even glared at him from across the room.

As they spoke, he waited for the right time to tell her a not so little detail of his life, which was nagging at him. He convinced himself to wait another day to tell her, that they had just found each other, that it was better if they eased into their friendship first, when, all of a sudden, the door behind them opened with a bang.

“There you are, baby,” he heard a woman’s voice say.

Draco winced when he saw (Y/N)’s confused expression. She turned around to face the newcomer, a woman with auburn hair, delicate features and a very soft complexion. She was staring at them expectantly, her hands on her hips and her head a bit tilted. Draco stood up and the woman walked up to him, wrapping her arms around his neck. She kissed him, a soft kiss he responded so reluctantly it reminded (Y/N) of her time with Ernie.

Still, she was startled, baffled even. Draco put his arms around her waist and (Y/N) looked away, feeling like she was intruding.

Draco cleared his throat. “Tori, this is (Y/N),” he said awkwardly signaling between both women, “(Y/N/N), this is Astoria.”

The auburn-haired woman squealed and turned to (Y/N), enveloping her in a hug. “Drakey has told me so so so so much about you! I have a lot to thank you for. You’ve made my job easier,” she joked, hugging (Y/N) tighter, “I’m glad you’ve reconnected and I really hope we can also be friends. You sound like a beautiful person.”

The situation as a whole was asphyxiating, to say the least. But even as Astoria kept talking and violating her physical boundaries (and also despite the fact that she was clearly Draco’s something), (Y/N) couldn’t dislike her. She was...sweet. Draco gave her an apologetic smile. She smiled back, hoping it concealed the sadness and disappointment she felt. Draco noticed that there was something behind her gesture, but out of respect for his girlfriend he didn’t want to name it. Nor admit he was feeling something similar.

“Astoria,” (Y/N) said, trying to be as friendly and good-tempered as possible.

“Tori,” she corrected.

“Tori,” (Y/N) tried again, the nickname still foreign in her tongue, “It was a pleasure to meet you. I really need to get going now, though. I don’t know if Dray–co told you this, but I am a teacher at Hogwarts. Tomorrow is a school day and I need to apparate to the castle first thing in the morning.”

“How interesting! You didn’t mention that, love,” she reproached her boyfriend playfully, “It was a pleasure to meet you too, (Y/N).”

“(Y/N/N),” she corrected her as well. As cringe-y as she found strangers calling her by the nickname only her friends used, she felt like she needed to return the gesture.

“(Y/N/N),” Astoria agreed with a smile.

“It was great to see you again, Draco,” she said before heading back to the party.

(Y/N) said goodbye to all of her friends and picked her coat. She was trying to let go of any feeling of rejection or discouragement. She had her friend back and that alone was enough to make her happy, right? Of course, things were meant to change. That’s what she tried telling herself to avoid the heartache.

If she was completely honest with herself, (Y/N) had to admit she had been waiting for a day in which Draco came back and they could be together. As the years came and went, her hope diminished, but it was never completely gone. It was always there, in the back of her mind, even when she dated other people. Finding him here today, as good as it was, had been a reality check. As much as she felt her heart chattering a bit, she knew it was for the best. (Y/N) needed to move on.

She closed the door behind her, getting ready to apparate back to her apartment. All of a sudden, someone hugged her from behind. She tensed for a second until she recognized Draco. He felt her relax in his arms and then tense up again, which made him a bit sad.

“It’s always like this with us, isn’t it?” he said, trying to humour her.

“What do you mean?” she asked, her voice trembling.

“You’re always leaving and I’m always chasing you,” he answered.

(Y/N) thought that it was the other way around, but laughed anyways, knowing very well that Draco was trying to lighten the mood. He felt satisfied and kissed the top of her head again. Feeling her relax in his arms once again gave him the courage to face her. He didn’t know how to address this. How can you even begin to explain to the woman you’ve loved for such a long time that you’re in a relationship with another woman – who you’re also in love with – but you haven’t entirely moved on?

“(Y/N)-”

“Don’t (Y/N) me, Dray,” she said sternly.

“(Y/N/N), I’m sorry”

“Why would you be sorry, Dray?”

“I don’t know. Astoria…”

“Is your girlfriend,” she finished.

“Yes,” he answered, not knowing what else to say.

“Listen, Dray. Today I found one of my closest friends again. He was affectionate as ever. And he’s getting his life back on track, which an absolute relief. If I tell you a secret, he had turned into a bit of a git the last time I saw him. Seeing him like this has made me very happy. So, let me enjoy that,” she said, a kind smile on her face.

Feeling like the luckiest man alive, Draco engulfed her in another hug. Once again in his arms, (Y/N) remembered the words of wisdom he had said all those years ago in Mexico, how he preferred to be her soulmate destined to be best friend than a boyfriend of a couple of months. She realized that maybe that’s what their thing was all about. And even if it was going to take time for her to get used to it, (Y/N) felt content.

tags: @fandomscombine @okaydraco @naomi02hook @iliketoast23 @winnsmills @oldfashionedlovergirlsblog @happycomb @xtrashmouthxtozierx @hopplessdreamer

[jaxsteamblog]

Cave of Two Lovers

Click here to read the full fic on AO3

The next pick-up day, Katara woke up and didn’t want to get out of bed. The days after Zuko’s birthday party had been weird, to say the least. When she pictured him bringing in cookies, or clipping thorns, it was impossible to then imagine him standing next to that woman, Mai.

It didn’t occur to her that incessantly thinking about Zuko was the actual problem.

She just didn’t like it when things didn’t fit, she supposed. While Mai hadn’t been outright rude to her and Suki, she certainly wasn’t the type to be nice. Zuko was nice.

Putting her hands on her face, Katara groaned.

Katara stopped for coffee on the way in, wanting to avoid the whole tea situation. When she got to the flower shop, she didn’t see Sokka’s car. Slightly concerned, Katara got out and jingled her keys in her free hand.

There was a note taped to the back door.

The tape pulled free with a pop and she opened the hastily folded note while sipping her coffee.

Kat- Had to leave for a slight emergency. Can’t text, running to car. Close up after Z gets flowers. Love, Sokka.

Frowning, Katara put the note in her mouth and used her key to get into the shop. It was dark in the back room and the hum of the air conditioner sounded like the call of an ocean animal. Putting down her keys and coffee, Katara fished her phone out of her purse and unlocked it as she walked to the front.

What’s going on? Call me.

Katara shed her purse by the workroom door and slipped her phone into her pocket. As she turned on the light and walked to the counter, she finally pulled the note from her lips. She read it again, hoping that if it were something serious he would have let her know.

With the shop being quieter, Katara could hear the van pull into the alley. She sighed and went back through the workroom, getting to the door just as Zuko hopped out.

“I just got here and Sokka is out for,” Katara paused as she thought. “Something.”

“Is everything okay?” Zuko asked, walking to the door. Katara shrugged.

“Honestly, I don’t know. I’m waiting for him to call.” She replied. Zuko nodded and rubbed the back of his neck. He started to say something just as Katara turned to the back door.

“It looked like a small order though. We should be okay.” She said.

“Yeah. After how much the party was, Uncle felt like scaling back a bit this week.” Zuko said. They walked inside and Katara helped Zuko with the vases, filling them as he went back inside and to grab the flowers. It didn’t take long at all to get everything loaded and secured.

“Hey, since the shop will be closed, do you have some free time this afternoon?” Zuko asked and slid the van door shut.

“I mean, yeah. Why?” Katara asked.

“There’s a new exhibit at the art museum downtown. I’ve been wanting to go but I need someone to take with me so I can lecture them about art styles.” Zuko answered.

“Okay, but I need to go grocery shopping first.” Katara said, shifting on her feet.

“Can I get your number?” Zuko asked. Katara bit the inside of her lip and nodded, watching as Zuko pulled out his phone from his pocket. She took it, just entering her number to let him add her name. When he got it back, his fingers moved deftly over the screen.

Her own phone dinged in her pocket.

“Alright, text me when you’re done?” He asked, replacing his phone and smiling at her. Katara’s fingers stretched wide for a second down by her leg. She nodded.

“Yeah.” She replied and Zuko’s smile widened briefly. She watched him get into his van and salute her before driving off.

Katara watched the van disappear around the corner and went back inside to lock up.

“Everything’s fine.” Sokka reassured her as Katara cradled her phone between her cheek and her shoulder. She scanned her groceries at the self checkout and glared down at her milk carton.

“You still haven’t told me what happened and it’s irritating me.” She hissed into the phone.

“Only because you’ll be mad.” Sokka replied.

“I’m already mad.” Katara jammed her card into the payment pad and entered her PIN.

“I went back to the flower market because I heard that Jimmy’s friend had a source coming in from the eastern provinces with a small shipment of panda lilies. You know how much I can sell these babies for?” Sokka explained in a rush.

Picking up her tote and sliding it over a shoulder, Katara moved her phone to her free hand.

“You ran out and couldn’t call me for panda lilies?” She retorted. After a brief pause, she continued. “Wait, you got them?”

“Three-quarters of the shipment! I couldn’t afford all twelve.”

Katara nodded to herself as she exited the store and went out to her car. “Are you going back to the shop?”

“Absolutely not.” Sokka answered firmly. “I don’t want to get robbed.”

“How cutthroat is the flower business?” Katara unlocked her car and placed her groceries in the backseat. All of Sokka’s clothes from the party were still in there; luckily the summer heat baked away any smell and now they were just limp.

“The best flowers bloom in blood.” Sokka said with theatrical menace. He cleared his throat and went on. “But seriously, there are a lot of people in the area who would want to move these. I’m going to try and find a buyer today.”

“Make sure to take Suki with you.” Katara said and got into the driver’s seat, immediately turning over the engine to get the A/C started.

“Hey, I am fully capable of protecting myself,” Sokka said. “But yes, I will be bringing Suki.”

Katara snorted and said her goodbyes before leaving the grocery store parking lot. While she waited at the side street, waiting for a pocket to open in the cross traffic, Katara chewed the inside of her cheek.

“Okay Booble, text Zuko.” She said and turned.

---

Katara waited outside of the museum and stared up at the large posters strung up across the face of the building. There were advertisements for the exhibit Zuko had been talking about and it looked fairly interesting. However, after standing in the afternoon sun, Katara was mostly looking forward to air conditioning.

“Have you been waiting long?” Zuko’s voice came up behind her and Katara turned. The lack of visible sweat on him made him seem cool, and Katara shivered at the thought.

“Yes, can we go in now?” She replied hastily. Distressed, Zuko walked quickly to the museum steps. They rushed to the ticket booth and Zuko bought two entrance passes. It being the beginning of the week and with little activity at such a hot hour, Katara supposed there weren’t many people staffed. Unsurprisingly, the ticket salesperson also punched their passes.

“Here you go.” Zuko said, handing Katara her pass. Her fingers brushed against his hand; he was cooler than she.

“You’re lucky, we’re getting the vents fixed so we’ll be closed the rest of the week.” The woman in the ticket booth said.

“The vents?” Katara repeated.

“Yeah, the air conditioning went out on us this morning. We got out some industrial fans but that’s just to get us through today. Enjoy!” The woman said.

Katara looked reproachfully at Zuko, who looked decidedly away from her.

The museum itself was grand, with ceilings that towered over her as practically far away as the sky. The stone around her was cool and offered some relief from the heat; the biggest problem was the lack of air circulating. She could hear various fans humming away like a hybrid of cicadas and jet engines. Just a constant, irritating wash of white noise.

“Have you ever been to Omashu?” Zuko asked. Katara shook her head and Zuko started walking to the side gallery.

“I’ve wanted to go see the cave there.” He added.

“The Cave of Two Lovers?” Katara asked.

“Yeah. Do you know the legend?”

“No, it’s just what the posters said.”

“Oh.” Zuko looked momentarily dumbfounded and they walked into the gallery in silence. There was a massive box fan at the door, angled to blow air into the room. Two large oscillating fans were standing like sentries at either end; both of them looked like they could take down a child if they fell.

The art on the walls, however, was simply breathtaking.

Done in a traditional style, watery brush strokes moved across multiple large canvases.

“Oma and Shu belonged to two different villages who had always fought each other. The war raged on for so long because a mountain separated them, making it difficult for either side to claim victory.” Zuko said as they stopped in front of the first canvas. As they moved around, he narrated the story. How the two lovers met atop the mountain, how they learned earthbending from the badgermoles to make a maze of tunnels, and how Shu was killed in the war between their homes.

As Zuko related Oma’s grief and how she used her earthbending, something the others had never seen another human being do, Katara felt goosebumps ripple over her skin and tears stung her eyes.

Finally, Omashu was created and an entire city-kingdom lived peacefully, laying on the foundation of stones carved out by a grieving woman.

Sniffling, Katara dabbed her nose with the back of her hand.

Zuko looked at her and then glanced around the room. “The whole exhibit is about them. Want to see the other pieces?”

They walked through a few more galleries with Zuko in fact talking about art styles and historical periods. Artist names popped up as frequently as place names and Katara stopped trying to discern the two types.

“Are you sure art isn’t your thing?” Katara asked at one point. Zuko laughed but didn’t respond.

After making it through four rooms, Katara was hot and tired. She said as much to Zuko and he turned about, looking around the room.

“Look, there’s a dark room there. We can at least cool down while I pull a map up on my phone.” He said, pointing to a door that was propped open across from them.

Katara looked in and saw paint cans in the dim light.

“It doesn’t look like this room’s finished.” She said.

“Want to go somewhere else?” Zuko asked.

“No. It has a bench. None of these other rooms have had a place to sit.” Katara said, feeling her feet start to throb as she stood still.

“Okay.” Zuko replied and they both entered. Zuko held out his phone with the flashlight on and they saw that this exhibit was far from being done. Drop cloths were haphazardly draped over painting supplies and a large ladder leaned against a wall. A push broom and large dust mop rested against the door frame and they jostled as Katara stepped in, pushing the door in a bit.

As she moved to sit on the bench, Zuko paced around the room, holding up his phone.

“I cannot get a signal.” He said. Katara watched as he stretched himself upward, leaning precariously over piles of hidden tools and paint to point his phone at the top of each wall. Noticing the lack of a tremble, Katara realized he must be very limber.

“Does this place not have wifi?” Katara asked, now taking her own phone out. There was a loud wooden clatter and the room darkened, causing her screen to illuminate a bit more.

Then there was the sound of metallic clatter.

“Well, that’s not ideal.” Zuko said.

Katara stared at the x over her bars on her cell phone screen.

“Zuko.” She said.

“Yes.”

“Did you knock over the brooms?”

A hesitation. “Yes.”

“And it closed the door?”

“Mmm.”

“And it’s locked?”

Silence.

“Zuko!” Katara whirled around and saw Zuko standing at the door, both hands wrapped around the doorknob.

“I’m sorry!” He said.

“We need to get out of here! What if they close up and we’re stuck in here all week?” Katara asked, panicked.

“Look, that won’t happen. If it, uh, if it comes down to it, uh,” Zuko let go of the doorknob and started pacing in front of the door.

“Can’t you freeze the hinges or something?” He asked.

“This place is too dry! Where am I supposed to get the water from?” Katara asked. Zuko, his hand hovering in the air over his hair, stopped and looked at her.

Katara recoiled, blushing. Seeing her reaction, Zuko held up his hands, blinding her with the flashlight.

“No! Oh no, I’m sorry. No, I didn’t mean, I’m sorry. Katara, I thought.” Zuko walked briskly to her and she swatted at him.

“Turn that stupid thing off before it drains your battery.” She snapped. Zuko obliged and spun a flame from his fingers, holding it in the palm of his hand.

“I was just trying to figure out how much we’d have to, I don’t know, spit on it. But that was also a stupid idea.” He said. Katara gaped at him, dumbfounded, before the corners of her mouth started to pull upwards and she laughed.

Chuckling, Zuko moved around and sat next to her, finally running his free hand through his hair.

“How are you so dumb?” Katara asked through her laughter.

“Azula is the prodigy. I was just lucky to be born first.” Zuko remarked. The bittersweetness in his voice stopped her mirth. Looking at him, she noticed how the shadows from the fire made his face look thinner.

“You’ve got that kind of family huh?” Katara questioned. Zuko nodded.

“Is that why you’re with Mai?” She went on. Zuko faced her, looking confused.

“What do you mean?”

Oh spirits he’s with her by choice. Katara thought and was glad that the dark room hid the tells of her embarrassment.

“It’s just, you two seem pretty different.” She clarified. Zuko sighed and focused on the flame. He started to fidget, shaping it with both hands.

“We didn’t use to be. I was just as emotionally drab as she is. Then this happened,” Zuko said and gestured to his face. “And then the end of the war. I don’t know.” His hands returned to the flame and he pulled on it, making the orange ball grow larger. “I wanted to look forward to things and enjoy them, the way my uncle enjoys his tea.”

At the mention of the war, Katara’s throat dried and she shifted away from him. Sensing the movement, Zuko leaned over a bit to look at her.

“Are you okay?” He asked.

Katara nodded; she balled one hand into a fist on the bench, the other went to the necklace sitting snug at her throat.

“I lost a lot in the war.” She replied, her voice husky.

“Sokka told me about it. I’m sorry for your loss and, well,” Zuko suddenly sounded tense. “I know you might not want to hear it from the enemy but, I lost people I loved too.”

Another question jumped up from her chest but Katara caught it in her teeth, biting down and catching the tip of her tongue with it. He was as old as Sokka and would have been that young during the war. But they had both been young when they had done what they did.

And so Katara couldn’t bring herself to ask because she didn’t want to know the answer.

“You’re not the enemy Zuko.” She said.

“Well, I did get us locked in here and we might die.” He replied. Katara huffed out a breath that might have been a laugh and stood. Walking slowly to the opposite wall, she squinted at the paint.

“I think something’s here. Bring the light over.” She said. Zuko walked over and Katara stepped back as the image expanded in the light.

“It’s the curse.” Zuko said.

“What curse?” Katara asked in alarm.

“The tunnels the lovers made were created to entrap those that would follow them. Basically, it says that you will be trapped if you don’t trust in love.” He said.

“So how do you trust in love?” Katara asked. Zuko frowned as he thought, his gaze lingering on the large painting before trickling down to the floor.

“The rest of the myth talks about how the love is the brightest in the dark. How in the worst of times, the two found the greatest love.” He said.

Katara looked at the painting. Two figures knelt across from each other, kissing. In the middle of the war, far below the earth, literally in the most impossible place, two people were free to love each other.

“Or.” Katara started. Zuko faced her and she turned to him. “Or we just remember that badgermoles are blind.”

“And?” Zuko asked. Silently, Katara stepped forward and placed her hands on the backs of Zuko’s. Rolling his fingers inward, he extinguished the flame and they stood in darkness.

His hands were warm.

“Look.” He whispered. Unable to see him, Katara still turned around. The open room seemed vast, but a faint spill of green made her look up. Dots like hanging crystal, glowing in green light, illuminated a path. It ended at the locked door, but began behind the ladder.

They shuffled slowly to the ladder and pulled it past the edges of the green path. Their eyes, having adjusted to the faint light, picked up the lines of a door in the edge of their vision. Zuko pried it open, disrupting more paint cans, and they were suddenly in an alcove. A man coming out of the bathroom across from them jumped at their sudden appearance before scowling at them and walking off.

Sheepish, Zuko and Katara hurried out, closing the door behind them.

“You owe me lunch.” Katara said. Zuko laughed and rubbed the back of his head.

“Deal.”

1 2 3 4 5 6 7

[starcharmfunzies]

spoilers My thoughts on KHMoM

Although I’m not done with the game yet I already finished the story, and with 30 hours of game time under my belt I think it’s enough to share my thoughts on it, both good and bad:

At first I thought Kairi’s narration would come to a close with her retelling the memories of her heart to someone (Ienzo, Ansem the Wise, etc), but it’s obvious by the fact that she mentions things there’s no way she could know of that the narration is more likely for us the players. This took me out of it a little because it couldn’t fit with MoM’s story; yes they were searching Kairi’s heart and it would have made sense if it was only Kairi’s perspective, but a lot of it has no place in her memory at all. It was just the franchise’s recap, and anybody else could have been narrating. Chirithy could have been a better option since he may actually know a lot more than Kairi does.

Alyson Stoner does a good job voice acting, but she’s not good at voicing Kairi. Her narration sounds more like Xion than Kairi, so you can tell she’s not able to separate them like Jesse does with Ven and Roxas. Alyson’s hoarse raspy voice in the narration gives Xion vibes, but idk if she was directed to do so because in KH3 her Kairi actually sounds a little more high pitched than she does in the narration of MoM.

Although the mapping of some songs could have been better I immensely enjoyed most of the songs in the game. I played in Proud mode and it felt balanced, challenging and fun.

The memory tracks were fun as well since the slight difference in gameplay, and I liked how they adapted it to boss battles as well.

Mickey changing outfits depending on what team you’re using is nice. I especially appreciate his look with the black coat it looks so silly I love it xD

I can’t believe there are 6 songs for Neverland plus Ruler or the Sky’s theme and “Neverland Sky” did not make the final cut goshdangit.

I’m genuinely surprised there were no Pirates of the Caribbean tracks. Probably something to do with copyright.

Seeing Aqua fly was lovely she looks so graceful and pretty I loved it QwQ

I appreciated that One Winged Angel made it, it was a pleasant surprise xD

Original Simple and Clean was nice but I was kinda hoping we’d have at least one of the remixed versions. Oh well.

It was so strange being able to interrupt Aqua’s animations to have her attack or jump because of how I used I was to having to wait for all her animations in BbS xD I mean it was nice! But it felt weird like ‘woah I can do that???’ Crazy stuff.

To this date KH3D is one of the games I like the least of the franchise and after playing the songs I realized how much I don’t like its soundtrack either xD Only songs I can actually hum from memory is All for One. For me most of the Disney world songs are pretty meh.

I can see what they were going for adding the extra Disney songs of Circle of Life, Beauty and the Beast and A Whole New World but because they can be kinda slow songs I don’t feel like they fit so good for a rhythm game? Specially Beauty and the Beast I did not like as much.

Seeing Elsa being shoved on the back of the box felt so shameless from Disney’s part you can tell they had Square at gun point and told them to have her there. That and also that Arendelle’s song was Let it Go instead of the actual world song like the rest of KH3′s Disney worlds.

VS Battles online are fun, I like ‘em c:

In the final battle it felt so wrong that Sora was the one to fight Xehanort instead of Kairi. It felt like a slap to the face after Kairi was so hyped as protagonist for this story. You wanna include Sora in this fight? Have Kairi fight with the Kingdom Key instead of Destiny’s Embrace, that way Kairi gets to fight Xehanort while also letting the players know that Sora is there helping her.

Seeing the flashback of her being taken by student Xehanort was hella interesting and creepy but in a cool way. I liked it.

I... don’t know how to feel about the fictional world. I’m still taking it all in xD but I’m open to it.

The way Kairi and Riku were so excited to see each other was hella cute ngl <3

I was kinda hoping Nameless Star would be Strelitzia, but it really seems like she’s Yozora’s gf. That’s fine I can live with that, she’s nice and I like her.

I can understand the logic of why Kairi did not go with Riku. Really, I do. But it felt like another slap to the face xD Like damn this poor girl barely got the spotlight before Riku went away with it again.

Kairi is gonna be Aqua’s student!! I’m actually really looking forward to this and I hope we get to see more of their interactions c:

Mickey trying to run off after Riku and having Donald and Goofy tackle him was so funny like bro who the hell are you kidding? You went off on your own to do shit without telling anyone all the way back from KH1.

“But Master Yen Sid, he’s all alone in a world we know nothing about!” That didn’t stop you before from taking your sweet time to rescue Aqua did it??? 💢💢💢

See? I told you guys there wouldn’t be any new Ven dialogue :’v

The final credits with everyone flying with Sora that one moment where it was him, Roxas and Ven just made me go 😍😍😍😍😍 !!

Yen Sid asking Donald and Goofy to tell everyone to stop their respective searches was such a relief Terra, Aqua and Ven can finally get out of the Realm of Darkness after a year of searching there QwQ

The setup for the next entry in the franchise got me definitely excited! I’ll be looking forward to anything new Nomura releases, and I’ll be on the lookout for KH’s 20th anniversary in 2022 c:

[the-fiction-witch]

My Princess

MOVIE MAZE RUNNER AU

COUPLE NEWT X READER (BLIND)

RATING SWEET

All good old fashioned fairy tales begin with narration, And this is no exception.

A long time ago, in a land far from here, sat a kingdom. Prosperous, clean and pleasant. And in this kingdom was a king and queen who unpon a winter morn, blessed there kingdom with a baby girl, a princess. However the day after she was born for reasons unknown to the kingdom the princess was sealed away never to be seen again.

Across the kingdom however while all this was going on a family rather wealthy and high standing welcomed a new baby boy, who they named newt. Yet his father already had two older more talented sons and thus newt was left purely to the attention of his mother.

And as in all old fairy tales, not long after his third birthday, his mother died.

The father wanted little to do with the blonde boy so he put him to work as a servent for his elder sons.

I groaned as I turned over trying to avoid the sunlight peering in thought my window hitting me in the eye I turned to face the wall hugging my old pillow tightly nuzzling close to the soft old fabric "uuummm princess..." I groaned holding it closer to me giving my pillow a kiss "good morning.... Uumm I know, I don't wanna get up either. Maybe we should just stay in bed a little while longer"I smirked pulling my pillow closer lightly rubbing myself on it but-

The sound of a thousand bells erupted from my wall so I groaned getting up and getting my clothes on running downstairs to the kitchen quickly making tea and breakfast taking the trays upstairs to my brother's room

"Your late!" They both complain

"I'm sorry the stove wouldn't light" I lied giving them there breakfast and there tea

"Liar! You where slaking!" They yelled

"He was probably off with that dam rat again!" Mark yelled

"He was probably sleeping in dreaming he was snuggling up with a princess again!" Alex yelled

"Shut up!' I complain going to leave

"You'll never get a princess newt! You'll be lucky dad doesn't just marry you off to the whore house, or some old crone!" Mark yelled I sighed shutting there door and going down the hall

"Good morning father" I smiled bringing him his breakfast, his tea and the morning paper

"Ahh newt, your late" he says

"Sorry the stove didn't want to light" I answered

"Very well" he nodded "Don't you have other things to be getting on with?" He asked and I nodded going back down to the kitchens to put on the pots for lunch and dinner once they where going I went around the house cleaning and dusting best I could, as soon as that was done I went out and fed the animals taking the laundry pot with me scrubbing and cleaning all the clothes often having to run inside to do some little task for my family to clean up after them, tie a shoe, get them a drink, I hated it but it's not like I have anywhere else to go, I wouldn't last a day out on the streets atleast this is a roof over my head, once I was done with the laundry I went and inside to start sorting the lunch sorting the soup I but on this morning, once it was done I took it up and severed it to them just as the door knocked my father glared so I went and got it, it was a messenger he handed me a letter and went off so I took it to my father who opened it and looked shocked

"Dear subject of our noble kingdom, all unmarried of age men are invited to a ball this evening to celebrate the birthday of the princess... And she will be choosing her husband" he read "this Is it boys I want you both looking your best one of you is bringing home a princess or so help me I'll roast your cocks on the open fire" he warned and my brother's ran off "what are you just standing around for?" He asked me

"So- so I can go father!" I asked excitedly

"What? You! No, go run there baths, go pick there clothes go on" he said

"But... The letter said all unmarried of age men.... That includes me father. I- I could try to marry the princess, better to have three options then just two?"

"Newt, I could never disprove your mother... But I have doubted since the day you where born that you where my son. Your not going that's final." He says I stormed upstairs to my room ignoring there bells and calls until I couldn't ignore them anymore I went and did the jobs they asked of me bidding them goodbye as they went to the palace I went up to my room feeding my little mouse a bit of biscuit looking at the castle across the way it lit up so beautifully I'd give anything to go...

"Your wish is my command" a voice smiled I jumped out of my skin looking to see a man behind me I pulled my little mouse close to me and screamed in terror "oh god I'm so sorry I didn't mean to scare you" he says

"W-w-w-ho are you?' I stuttered in fear

"Your fairy godfather you idiot' he laughs messing with my hair

"Fairy what?" I asked "if your my fairy... Godfather, why the hell haven't you helped before? You know my mum died! I've been abused and neglected since she died by my own father, who in fact might not be my father, and me not going to a party is the time you get off your ass to help with my problems?" I complain

"Look kid, were having to stretch alot of fairy tale cliché to get this weird ass plot to work it's really not the time for questioning it" he warns "now you wanna go have a shot at banging a princess or not?"

"Fine" I sighed "but this is really a stretch"

We headed outside and with a wave of a wand I was washed dressed and presentable "whoa! I wish I could have a bath and get dressed with a magic wand that would make life so much easier"

"Its amazing trust me, and your going to need some transport" he says taking my mouse from me

"Hey leave him alone!" I complain but with a flick and some magic dust he was a beautiful white horse that looked very confused "whoa... You uhh you got big Mr mouse. I Uhhh I just like sniffed some ye old

Fairy tail floor cleaner didn't I? I'm on like some kinda trip? Are you just some nutter who broke into my house and is feeding me acid?"

"Two things can be true at once" he shrugs "now go get that girl!" He encouraged...

When I arrived at the palace I was ushered to a huge hall filled with people I felt everyone's eyes on me it was horrible I went through the hordes of people trying to escape to a less populated area when I bumped into someone

"Ooh goodness I'm so sorry" a voice said

"No, no quiet alright it was my fault" I said opening my eyes to see a girl in a beautiful blue dress with a Vail of lace covering her face she had been knocked to the floor as had I so I got up and helped her

"I'm sorry sorry I didn't see you" she says

"No, no really it's quite alright, it's my fault I should have been looking where I was going, I'm very sorry," I told her

"Where were you going?" She asks

"Oh the outer room get our from the masses a bit" i laughed which made her giggle

'likewise, would you mind?" She asks putting up her arm

"Of course not" I smiled letting her take my arm as she lead me to the little side room full of pictures and bookshelves

"I rather like it in here" she says

"The work is beautiful, and there are some amazing books" I said

"I like the quiet" she said "knowone ever comes in here"

"How do you know?" I ask her

"I go here often, I've never heard anyone else here" she smiled "I'm sorry... I should probably get back to the party"

"Well not if you don't want to" I told her

"I don't really want to" she giggled, we sat on a sofa chatting for what felt like forever she held my hand the whole time "I should really go back now, it is my party after all" she says

"Y-your party?" I asked "your the princess?"

"I am, I don't like telling people they tend to treat me differently" she explained

"I understand, my princess"

"Your sweet" she giggled "what's your name?"

"Newt" I smiled "what's your name princess?"

"Y/n" she smiled we sat and chatted for a while more talking about books and things until "newt... You know I'm looking for a husband tonight?"

"I do" I smiled

"Could I show you something?" She asks and I nodded she then slowly pulled back the lace pushing it over her head, she had beautiful hair, a adorable face, a smile that made me smile even more, she had a couple of scars on her cheeks and around her eyes and her eyes ... They where unique.

"Can I ask you what happened to your eyes?" I asked her

"The day after I was born when my family showed me off to the kingdom, someone tried to kill me. They failed but I was blinded"

"Y-your blind?" I asked "ohh you sweet princess"

"I wanted to find someone who didn't care about my eyes, but didn't want me for just my kingdom" she explained

"Y/n... I think your eyes are beautiful" I told her caressing her cheek "could uhh Could I kiss you?"

"I'd be delighted" she smiled I went to kiss her but I heard the chimes of the clocktower

"Im sorry... I have to go" I told her

"No please" she said holding my hand

"I'm so sorry y/n, if you want to see me again.... My name's newt I live on glade drive," I told her giving her head s kiss and quickly getting out the castle and before I even got out the gates everytime changed back so I sighed picking up my mouse and heading home.

I groaned hugging my pillow tightly

"Uuuummmm good morning princess" I smiled kissing my pillow I sighed as I heard the bells so I got up getting dressed "ummm see you later y/n" I smiled giving my pillow a kiss and going down doing all my usual jobs till there was a knock on the door that my father went to get it my brother's following him

"sir we are looking for the boy from last night, the princess has chosen him for her groom" the man said as he came in with y/n in a little light blue dress and her Vail still over her face

"She has!" I asked excitedly

"Quiet you! Excuse him young servent boy" my father said

"Humm he sounds familiar" she said

"Your highness he didn't even attend last night" he said

"Wait he's-" I began but he slapped me to Shut me up she went over holding the hands of each of my brother's

"Are you sure there is knowone else here?" She asked

"Of course not" he said holding my arm tightly and she sadly left with the castle men but I slapped his hand away and ran out

"Y/n!" I yelled going out the door she turned on the garden path "y/n... My princess"

"Newt?" She asked flicking up her Vail I smiled going to her and holding her hands she smiled widely and I caressed her cheek "it is you" she smiled "can you kiss me now?"

"Of course princess" I smiled happily kissing her sweet lips

"Let's go to the castle darling" she smiled

"Yes my princess" I smiled getting the few things I had and letting her take me home.

[theredscreech]

Grammar Tips That Are Actually Useful #2

So I honestly didn’t expect to do another one of these, but ever since my first GTTAAU post got a whole bunch of hits over the last few days, I decided to do another one about a popular piece of grammar that I notice is often misused.

Writers, gather ‘round as we explore the dreadful and terrible aspect of writing that is the...

Epithet.

Dun, dun, duuuuuuuun!

I first want to preface this by saying that I was notorious for this. I am so sorry to everyone who read my TMNT fics from 2016; I didn’t know better and I apologise profusely!! I went entire pages without naming a character in the narrative and I have no one to blame but my own ignorance, which has now been remedied - Hallelujah!

To explain: An epithet has a few definitions, so let’s take a look at them. (Definitions courtesy of dictionary.com.)

1. Any word or phrase applied to a person or thing to describe an actual or attributed quality: “Richard the Lion-Hearted” is an epithet of Richard I.

2. A characterizing word or phrase firmly associated with a person or thing and often used in place of an actual name, title, or the like, as “man's best friend” for “dog.”

3. A word, phrase, or expression used invectively as a term of abuse or contempt, to express hostility, etc.

In other words, an epithet is an adjective or noun to describe or name someone without using their proper name.

(There’s a ton more under the Keep Reading, so buckle up.)

Epithets are used in a variety of ways to describe a variety of any character’s characteristics (haha). Most common examples for this are:

hair - the blond, the blonde, the black-haired person, etc.

eye-colour - the green-eyed person, the brown-eyed person, etc.

skin-colour - the pale-skinned person, the dark-skinned person, etc. (Side note: NEVER use food to describe skin colour/tone (eg. olive-skinned). It is offensive and wrong, so just don’t. If you have any questions, I’d encourage you to follow @writingwithcolor (which I do). They have excellent commentary for writers who write characters of varying ethnicities, religions, etc. Check out their FAQ before asking anything, though, because they’ve answered a ton of different questions already.)

status - the child, the teen, my boyfriend, his husband, etc.

profession - the engineer, the doctor, the ninja, etc.

species - the dwarf, the human, the dragon, etc.

or any combination - the green-haired teen (I saw this one in a fic from Izuku’s own POV), the orange-masked turtle (this one is mine and also from Mikey’s POV, and I am sooooo sorry.), etc.

There are, of course, dozens more of examples, but these are the most common ones, especially in fanfiction, so let’s leave it at that.

So why do writers use epithets so often?

Honestly, it becomes tedious and repetitive to write out the characters’ names all the time. It looks odd, too, all those ‘Mikeys’ and ‘Izukus’ and ‘Natasha Romanovas’ and what-nots. They’re just prancy-dancing all over your page and it looks. so. off. There’s just something about seeing characters’ names that, for whatever reason, some writers don’t like. And I kid you not, I had to train myself out of this way of thinking.

I had to train myself because as soon as I learned about epithets, I saw that I was using them absolutely everywhere. I would write literal pages without using anyone’s name, and four years later, I look back at those stories I wrote and posted publicly, and I cringe. But it’s the good kind of cringing because it lets me know how far I’ve come in my writing craft, that even though I’ve been writing for years and years, there’s always something new to learn. There’s always something to improve upon.

“Good for you, Red, but why are epithets so bad?”

Well, technically they’re not bad. They’re just used poorly or overused or both (as was my case).

We’ve already talked a bit about over usage (unless you missed the parts where I confessed to writing pages without using names), so let’s talk about poor usage.

Poor usage of epithets is when epithets are used incorrectly.

Here’s an example: Mikey looked at his red-masked brother.

Gah, that physically pained me to write! Okay, so what’s wrong with this sentence? Well, unless we’re writing for Mirage Studios’ comic (1984) where all four turtles of the TMNT wore red masks, then we’ve got a pretty good idea that ‘red-masked brother’ actually means ‘Raphael’.

Okay, great, so we know ‘red-masked brother’ is Raph, so why is this an example of poor epithet usage?

Answer: Because we already know Raph has a red mask. It is set. It is eternal. It’s a part of who he is, just like his skin or his shell. If you are at all familiar with this character, you will know that Raph is the ‘red-masked turtle’.

Here’s the thing epithets do. Epithets estrange characters from each other. This is why they’re most commonly and properly used for characters whom either we as the audience/narrator or the characters themselves do not know.

This is why phrases like ‘the dark-clad figure’ or ‘the blonde cashier’ are so popular - because we do not know who the people are! Sure, we can always go up to the dark-clad figure and introduce ourselves, or we can look at the blonde cashier’s name tag, and that’s sort of the point because we do not know who these people are yet. Epithets are used, more often than not, for unknowns until they are made known.

There are exceptions to this, of course, of course, most commonly of which are status ones: my husband, his son, their niece, etc.

These are fine, but use them wisely and sparingly (tying into the over usage part again).

Here’s a better example: I walked into the kitchen and found my husband already there and making breakfast for all three children.

‘My husband’ and ‘all three children’ are epithets, but they don’t estrange the characters, per se, because they’re letting us know who’s who and their importance to the narrator/character. That being said, you should still use ‘my husband’ sparingly because if you’re ‘my husband’-ing your husband, whose name is Henry, all over kingdom come, it begins to sound...not good. Like, why would you need to remind yourself Henry is your husband all the time? Do you have amnesia? Are you just forgetful? Are you insecure? Maybe he was unfaithful at some point and he’s doing better, but you’re internalising that and reinforcing the fact that he’s yours? Maybe you just don’t like his name? Or don’t know his name?

Hard to say.

The fact of the matter is this: the closer the characters are in terms of their relationship (platonic, romantic, as friends, as siblings, whatever), the less they will use epithets for each other.

For example: I, personally, have never thought of my mother as ‘the brown-haired woman’. She has always been mom or mum or other such derivatives. It never crosses my mind.

Contrarily, when I’m working at the book store and I’ve taken a few things up to the cash desk for a customer, I’ll let the cashier know that the items are for ‘the curly-haired woman with sunglasses’. Because she is a stranger to me.

Consider Disney’s film Lady and the Tramp (1955). I haven’t seen the live action, so I can’t make a comparison, but the 1955 version fits for what I want to talk about here.

Please name Lady’s owners.

If you said, ‘Jim Dear’ and ‘Darling’, you would be absolutely correct! While we can safely assume that ‘Jim Dear’ is actually ‘Jim’ or even ‘James’, we have no idea of Darling’s real name. Some pet names and nicknames are technically epithets if we’re being especially pedantic today (please see Disney’s Tangled’s character Flynn Ryder’s nickname for Rapunzel), but let’s say for the sake of argument that all pet names fall into the category of proper names, particularly since we’re talking about Lady and the Tramp (1955).

If you listen closely, you will notice that not once - not a single time, ever - do any of the characters that know Jim Dear and Darling call them by anything else (except for Jim Dear’s men friends at the baby shower; they all call him ‘Jim’). Even Darling’s friends call her ‘Darling’. Jock and Trusty both call Lady’s owners/masters ‘Jim Dear’ and ‘Darling’. Never ‘Lady’s owners’ or whatever else.

This is a perfect example of using names instead of epithets. It helps immensely that they aren’t main characters - secondary characters, certainly, but not main - but the point remains.

“But, Red, the Tramp never calls Lady by her name!”

And you’re right! But there’s a reason for that: Lady never formally introduced herself. The story begins in December of 1909 (thank you, Wikipedia). So by the time Lady is six months old, we’re well into 1910. Conventions in this era, as far as I know, not that I am an expert, dictate that ladies/women introduce themselves so that men could then address them (or something like that? Someone please correct me if I’m wrong). Since Lady never does that, Tramp is reduced to giving her the pet name ‘Pigeon’ or ‘Pige (Pidge?)’. Also, Lady doesn’t find out Tramp’s name until the dogs at the pound tell her.

Either way, Tramp is forced to use a pet name, but it is not an epithet simply because ‘Pigeon’ isn’t describing Lady’s characteristics.

Now, Tramp on the other hand...is a characteristic, and someone can definitely win the argument of whether this is an epithet or not. Hint: it is because it’s preceded by ‘the’. He is literally introduced as ‘the Tramp’ (Bull, the bulldog, says it first in a scene with him, Peg and the Tramp, and then Toughy drops it at the pound in front of Lady). This is his epithet, his defining characteristic, because he is introduced as it: The Tramp.

But this is not his only characteristic. He’s helpful and compassionate (the entire scene when he fights off three alley dogs chasing Lady and then proceeds to help her get the muzzle off), he’s also playful (shows Lady there’s more to life than “life on a leash”), courageous (he fights a rat), and respectful of Lady’s choices (tries to persuade her to run away with him but pursues the matter no further when she tells him ‘no’, and he also backs off when she’s mad at him).

This is what epithets do. Not only do they estrange the characters, but they also reduce the characters to a base level. Those well-rounded, complex babies you so carefully crafted become one-dimensional and flat in the span of a single phrase. They become ‘black-haired men’ and ‘green-eyed teens’ and ‘red-masked brothers’ and in that moment, that is all they are and when you continue to reinforce that, that is all the readers will see them as. Besides the fact that readers might very well forget their names entirely, especially if it’s an original work where the audience is not as familiar with the characters as they would be with fanfiction.

This is why Lady never addresses Tramp directly in the film. If she’s speaking to him, she’s looking at him so he knows she’s addressing him. It’s a subtle nuance in the film because Lady refuses to reduce Tramp to his epithet (once she learns it) because he isn’t that basic. (Another reason why Lady and the Tramp II: Scamp’s Adventure bugs me because I swear she actually calls him ‘Tramp’ and it feels so wrong for her to address him like that.) But Tramp gives Lady a nickname. See the difference?

So, yes. While epithets are not strictly bad, they are best when used properly and sparingly. Like, yes, please, feel free to remind us that Mikey loves his brothers and that Katsuki calls his friends ‘Spiky-hair’ or whatever. These are descriptive and good and should be used, just be aware of when and how often you use them, not to mention why. If you’re simply using an epithet for the sake of avoiding saying someone’s name, then it’s poor usage.

And holy freaking wow, this thing is ginormous! I’m going to stop here because I don’t think I can write another word about epithets and how important they are.

Thank you for reading! I hope this helps. And a reminder: check out RavenshellRorschach on DeviantArt for comprehensive how-to’s on some of English’s toughest homophones and grammar points.

Cheers, y’all!

~ Red

[booksoanahasread]

Trei Coroane Întunecate by Kendare Blake

Did I just start squealing because I have fallen in love with this novel and this series? Yes, I did. Damn. It’s so good. So good. A masterpiece. A wonder in modern fantasy series. How on Earth is this book so good?

The writing is fantastic, the omniscient, omnipresent, and objective narrator is the only way this novel could have been executed so perfectly. The way the reader could somehow live vicariously through multiple characters other than the three queens was well-thought out. The characters were finely described, finely shown. They were absolutely the diamonds of the story. 

I love the characters already. I thought I would end up hating two of the queens, but the way the author decided to explain how each of them was brought up was a strategic move. I love Katherine in all honesty, she is my favourite of the three queens, but Arsinoe and Mirabella are both fantastic as well. The way each of them had perfectly obvious strengths was a miracle, but their weaknesses were just as visible. 

Katherine, oh my gosh. I love her so much. I find her so incredible. She isn’t a toxic in a family that only wanted her to do that. She was constantly poisoned, constantly hurt. Damn she is incredible. She managed to gain an immunity to some poisons, she learned of so many poisons, and she would administer them just as easily. She is so strong, but also human. She falls in love with Pietyr, she falls in love with a boy at the heart of the family that tortured her. Her last appearance in the novel is so awe-inspiring. Her comeback from her all in the abyss was one of the most amazing sequences I’ve read in a while. I didn’t think Kat would return, unless it was her cadavre. 

Arsinoe is a really cool girl. She was brought up in a seemingly poor household, but that didn’t mean much. Her tries to run away from her duties as queen were relatable, after all who would want to kill their sisters to gain a throne? Her friendship with Jules shows how much she cares about others, her underlying empathy. Her relationship with Billy was sweet, honest, simple. It was nice to see her around someone she felt on the same plan with. The ground-breaking fact that is revealed at the end of the novel, in the last page, the last sentence, truly makes the reader hunger for the next book in the series.

Mirabella is illustrated as a powerful woman who is also too obsessed with her power and her past. She does show a lot of empathy for the other sisters, unlike Katherine and Arsinoe. Despite her being backed by the Temple and their leaders, she sometimes shows humility. She doesn’t really want to hurt anyone. She falls in love with Joseph so quickly and so deeply that it should be discouraged. She is forced to do whatever the Temple would like and when she tries to run away, her friends pay the price. I’m curious to see whether she will become bloodthirsty in the next books, after what she thinks is a betrayal. 

I loved the setting of the novel, the fact that the author created a whole different world. The matriarchal society was such a new concept to me, I never dreamed of such a thing. Everything must be heard by the women of the families. The head of the religious order was a woman, the head of the kingdom was a queen, the head of the council was a woman. Instead of hearing of how so many men rule over women, it was refreshing and eye-opening to read about a world in which women are the leaders. 

The men in the novel aren’t even depicted one dimensionally, but they are portrayed as being the women’s equals. It was so cool to see how the repercussions of the novel truly were because of the women who decided that they shouldn’t listen to the men in their lives. The women were the stars of the novel. 

I loved the construction of the universe and the relations between the Fennbirn Island and the so-called Continent. The way the king-consort must be from the continent so as to keep the economy prospering and keep the peace that has been struck between the two masses of land. The author really thought out so many small things that make this whole book even more fascinating and splendid. It is extravagant and detailed. 

I think I could have read this book all in one day, I was glued to my seat, or rather my bed. It is an amazing book. I would recommend this book to so many people, I may not shut up about it for the next couple of weeks. I loved it so much. It is incredible. 

[terramythos]

TerraMythos' 2020 Reading Challenge - Book 8 of 26

Title: Wildwood (Wildwood Chronicles #1) (2011) 

Author: Colin Meloy (illustrated by Carson Ellis) 

Genre/Tags: Kid Lit, Fantasy, Fairy Tale, Contemporary, Illustrated, Third-Person, Female Protagonist 

Rating: 6/10

Date Began: 3/15/2020

Date Finished: 3/22/2020

12-year-old Prue is babysitting her infant brother Mac when they are attacked by a murder of crows. The birds kidnap Mac and carry him into a mysterious forest on the edge of Portland known as the Impassable Wilderness -- a place no one seems to ever acknowledge or talk about. Prue resolves to enter the Wilderness and rescue Mac, but is trailed by one of her classmates named Curtis. The two are accosted by a party of sapient coyote soldiers and become separated. Before long, both become entangled in the strange politics between various factions of the forest.

She scanned her surroundings and then looked back at the squirrel, which had cocked its head to the side, studying her. “So what do I do now?” asked Prue. “My brother was kidnapped by birds. My friend was captured by coyotes.” She snapped her fingers. “And I nearly forgot: My bike is broken. Sounds like a country song. If country songs were really, really weird.” 

I'll admit, the only reason this book was on my radar is it's a middle-grade kid’s book written by, uh, the lead singer of The Decemberists, Colin Meloy. That is too hilarious to pass up considering the very adult subject matter of most Decemberists songs. Wildwood is Meloy's debut novel. It certainly isn't terrible, but it suffers from several core issues in its execution. The result is, unfortunately, a pretty mediocre story.

You can probably tell by my summary, but this book follows the whole "child protagonist transported to an alternate/parallel world" formula. Whether it's Narnia, Alice in Wonderland, Coraline, Harry Potter, The Wizard of Oz, or even Spirited Away, I guarantee you've experienced similar stories. The problem with Wildwood isn’t that it uses this formula, but that it just doesn’t bring anything new to the table. If you've read The Lion, the Witch and the Wardrobe by C. S. Lewis, you have basically read this book. The setting and some of the characters are different, but it has so many of the same beats and tropes that, at best, it feels like a modern retelling of that story.

There are parts where Wildwood feels more original, mostly when it skirts into darker subject matter, but it seems like Meloy (or his editor) was afraid of putting too much of that in a kid’s book and flaked out. Other original and interesting concepts do appear over the course of the story, but despite the length of the novel there is very little focus on any one idea, character, or setting at any given point. Most of these fizzle out or are simply forgotten.

It isn't a terrible book just for having a generic setup, though. In fact there are some aspects of the story I really like on a conceptual level. I adore stories with sapient, talking animals. In particular I love the idea of a literal kingdom of birds, and I thought the Avian Principality was a pretty neat execution of that. There's a part in the story where a character is captured, and I love the design of the prison they end up in. It's a vast underground cave under a giant root system, with rickety cages hanging like pendulums from the ceiling. That's just really cool! There is a fairly interesting twist/side story about Prue's parents that connects to the main story which I also liked. And I would be remiss to ignore the excellent illustrations by Carson Ellis. She has a very distinct style that lends itself perfectly to a kid’s book.

I did generally like the writing-- but the execution was not particularly interesting. I'm a big fan of The Decemberists largely because of the interesting worldplay and vocabulary in their songs. In some ways that does come across here. There were many words I had to look up (”what the heck does Lilliputian mean? ...oh”). Meloy has a good sense of humor; many jokes and allegories were genuinely funny as an adult reader. And the wilderness/forest imagery was on-point, though sometimes repetitive. But beyond that, the narration just doesn't commit to an interesting style. It's adequate for the story but not very noteworthy otherwise.

As for the plot itself, it felt contrived, like Meloy was working off of an outline and connecting events in the most convenient ways possible. Much of the action is not character driven; just events happening to the protagonists outside of their control, or side characters driving the action instead. While this improves over time, the problem plagues the whole story regardless, all the way up to the climax. Wildwood also suffers from idiot plot syndrome, where characters do extraordinarily stupid things to advance the plot. There are multiple times the villain could solve her problems by just killing someone and... doesn't, for some reason, even though we are led to believe she has NO qualms about committing genocide on a whim. Stuff like that just left me scratching my head.

Unfortunately this book suffers from one other big flaw... it is just too damn long. This book is a middle-grade book written primarily for 10-to-13 year olds... and it is 541 pages long. Length isn't necessarily an issue if the story is really good, but this one just drags after a while. If the characters or story were particularly compelling, maybe 500+ pages would be fine... but in my experience that wasn’t the case. Add that to the attention span of even the most voracious middle-grade reader, and this book really needed to be shorter.

This is the first book in a trilogy, and it sounds like some of my issues are addressed in future volumes based on skimmed reviews. But the thought of tackling another huge tome on the off chance that it's a drastic improvement on Wildwood is a bit too much for me at the moment. I might give it another shot later, but I'm going to read something else next.

Again, it's not an awful book by any means... just pretty mediocre. I was mildly entertained, but I did get bored by the book several times and had to press myself to keep going. If you are looking for this type of story, countless books and films have done it better. Maybe it does get better in Under Wildwood and Wildwood Imperium, but this wasn’t a very promising start.

[longsightmyth]

Myth & Kat read Tiger’s Curse

Kat’s Post Here

So I read this and skimmed the second one years ago. Kat’s memories differ from mine, and put me in the unusual position (for me) of the one who doesn’t expect much. She remembers great setting descriptions. I remember wikipedia infodumps via Mr. Kaddam. We both remember the white savior stuff. Let’s see how this goes.

Prologue

Summary

We start out with The Tiger by William Blake because sure I guess what else were we going to start with?

The prisoner stood with his hands tied in front of him, tired, beaten, and filthy but with a proud back befitting his royal Indian heritage.

Houck, Colleen. Tiger's Curse (Book 1 in the Tiger's Curse Series) (p. 1). Splinter. Kindle Edition.

Oh no

The prisoner spoke first, struggling to keep the betrayal out of his voice, “Why have you—my soon-to-be-father—treated me with such . . . inhospitality?”

Houck, Colleen. Tiger's Curse (Book 1 in the Tiger's Curse Series) (p. 2). Splinter. Kindle Edition.

I will grant that that tickled my funny bone a little bit. Anyway, the prince is standing shackled in front of his fiancee (and Yesubai called as such in the narrative, and look, using common words to make fantasy understandable is fine but betrothed as a word and concept exists, why are you gonna use a french word here), his fiancee’s father (Lokesh, raja of a small kingdom) and the prince’s brother, Kishan. The prince asks why on earth this whole thing was necessary, since he’s about to be married to Yesubai and Lokesh could have just asked. Lokesh asys Kishan offered him a better deal and is in love with Yesubai.

The prince turned his attention to Yesubai, who, with cheeks aflame, assumed a demure, submissive pose with her head bowed. His arranged marriage to Yesubai was supposed to have ushered in an era of peace between the two kingdoms. He had been away for the last four months overseeing military operations on the far side of the empire and had left his brother to watch over the kingdom.

I guess Kishan was watching a little bit more than just the kingdom.

Houck, Colleen. Tiger's Curse (Book 1 in the Tiger's Curse Series) (pp. 2-3). Splinter. Kindle Edition.

Lokesh offers the prince a deal: give him the piece of the Damon amulet and the prince gets to live. Yesubai will be marrying Kishan. Lokesh is going to rule both kingdoms no matter what, somehow.

Kishan argues that that wasn’t the deal.

Lokesh shot out his hand as quickly as a snake and grabbed Kishan’s wrist. “You should have learned by now that I take whatever I want. If you would prefer the view from where your brother is standing, I would be happy to accommodate you.”

Kishan shifted in his chair but kept silent.

Lokesh continued. “No? Very well, I have now amended our former arrangement. Your brother will be killed if he does not comply with my wishes, and you will never marry my daughter unless you hand over your piece of the amulet to me as well. This private arrangement of ours can easily be revoked, and I can have Yesubai married to a different man—a man of my choosing. Perhaps an old sultan would cool her blood. If you want to remain close to Yesubai, you will learn to be submissive.”

Houck, Colleen. Tiger's Curse (Book 1 in the Tiger's Curse Series) (p. 4). Splinter. Kindle Edition.

Neither brother is apparently willing to give up their piece of the Damon amulet, so Lokesh cuts the prince’s arm and lets blood drip onto a wooden amulet. I question why he didn’t just take the prince’s necklace? Is there an enchantment? Unclear.

Actually Kat and I were talking while looking at each other’s notes and uh. It’s also unclear where Lokesh got the amulet from. Did he rip it from ‘the prisoner’s’ neck? Did he bring his own home-grown? Was store-bought fine? This joke is getting away from me. See for yourself:

Lokesh tore a wooden talisman from around his neck and placed it beneath the prisoner’s arm. Blood dripped from the knife onto the charm, and the engraved symbol glowed a fiery red before pulsing an unnatural white light.

Houck, Colleen. Tiger's Curse (Book 1 in the Tiger's Curse Series) (p. 5). Splinter. Kindle Edition.

I’m pretty sure Lokesh brought his own but Kat thought he had taken ‘the prisoner’s’ amulet, so I thought I should mention that.

Anyway.

The light shot toward the prince with groping fingers that pierced his chest and clawed its way through his body. Though strong, he wasn’t prepared for the pain. The captive screamed as his body suddenly became inflamed with a prickly heat and he fell to the floor.

Houck, Colleen. Tiger's Curse (Book 1 in the Tiger's Curse Series) (p. 5). Splinter. Kindle Edition.

Yesubai and Kishan attack Lokesh and Yesubai dies by way of falling and hitting her head on the stairs.

The prince was aware that his brother was near, overtaken by grief as the life drained from Yesubai’s limp body. Then he was aware of nothing except the pain.

Houck, Colleen. Tiger's Curse (Book 1 in the Tiger's Curse Series) (p. 6). Splinter. Kindle Edition.

Thus ends the prologue.

Thoughts

The prose is less juvenile than I remembered, but not by much. Maybe I’ll up my assessment to middle-school age, but we’ll see when we get to Kelsey.

Of course A Woman led Kishan astray. Of course. Though admittedly, there is a prequel novella entirely about Yesubai whose summary reads as much more mature than the rest of this, so who knows? Either way: sorry, Yesubai. Your life appears to have sucked and so did your death.

I am still not a fan of prologues (I make exceptions for years/decades/centuries exposition a la Anne McCaffrey’s Pern explanations and The Keltiad’s general ‘this is how we have celts in space’ stuff). This could have been worked into the story later in one of the truly impressive wikipedia infodumps.

And look. People might think I’m being mean for nagging on the language structure stuff here, but it’s a pet peeve. If you are otherwise trying to sound ornate or dramatic, sentence structure and rhythm is more important than word choice.

That doesn’t mean you should bandy around ‘guess’ instead of ‘suppose’ or any number of other relatively modern turns of phrase. “I guess” in your centuries old Indian prince’s head? Really?

Kishan, it seemed, had been watching more than the kingdom.

Fixed it for you. That’s not even the only way it could be fixed!

Oh, Kishan. You watched more than just my kingdom, it seems.

Ornate direct thought!

Also, like. ‘Proud back befitting his noble Indian heritage’? Ummmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm.

Why is he thinking about being Indian in a room full of Indians? Indian is his default. Indian is at this point of the book THE default, or it should be. Maybe mention his country instead or just ‘Proud back befitting his royal heritage.’ It would be a, better worded, and b, not weirdly racist. I get that the author is trying to establish that he IS Indian, but there are better ways.

Kat’s Thoughts

I think, overall, this prologue is a crash course in Houck trying to fit in with writers of olde who have managed this particular kind of narration. She’s trying to infuse it with mystery, magic, and mayhem, and achieving none of the above. For starters, there’s no reason for Ren to not be referring to himself by his own name (just like there’s no reason for him to be admiring his own “proud back befitting his noble Indian heritage,” as Myth mentions above), and if we didn’t want to reveal who he was right away, maybe we should’ve been in Lokesh’s head for this, or maybe even Yesubai. If I recall correctly, Yesubai is one of the biggest catalysts for the rift between Ren and Kishan (especially when they both start to develop feelings for Kelsey), and her death is therefore important, but still. It’s a cheap move that panders to the typical fridged woman for man pain trope people, for some reason, still use.

I’m less opposed to prologues than Myth is, since I do think they can be written well, but this one didn’t tell us anything we couldn’t have learned throughout the book. In fact, I think we even learn more about it when Kelsey learns of what happened between the two brothers, so this will simply be redundant information.

[mermaidsirennikita]

March 2019 Book Roundup

Did I read a lot of duds in March?  Yes.  (YA Fantasy is not off to the greatest start this year.)  However, I also read the first book of 2019 that I actually loved, Daisy Jones and The Six, and just finished the super fun thriller My Lovely Wife.  Are things looking up?  We shall see.

Four Dead Queens by Astride Scholte 2/5.  In Quadara, a queen rules each nation, huddled away in a palace that keeps all four safe.  Which is why it’s so shocking when Queen Iris is murdered within the very palace itself. Meanwhile, thief Keralie intercepts a comm disk that gives her a vision of not only Iris’s death, but those of the other three queens--all brutally murdered.  Teaming up with the very messenger she stole from, Keralie sets out to discover the intended recipient of the disk, believing that this will uncover the killer and give her a valuable bartering tool.  I really liked the concept of the four queens in theory--but first off, it really doesn’t work for a sci fi novel.  And I didn’t read the summary closely enough, so I figured that this was a fantasy book.  Second, the world is poorly built.  Scholte also has way too many perspectives.  Keralie is our ultimate lead, but we get a POV from each queen, and they are all more interesting and less annoying than Keralie, who just doesn’t think or act like a real person.  Wouldn’t recommend.

The Silent Patient by Alex Michaelides.  2/5.  Alicia Berenson is a popular and acclaimed painter--until she murders her husband with no warning.  After Alicia becomes the main point of obsession for criminal psychotherapist Theo--to the point that he begins working at the institution in which she is housed for the explicit purpose of studying her--the question is raised: can she prompted out of her catatonic state?  And if she is, what will she reveal?  Basically, I hated reading from Theo’s perspective.  What a typical boring mediocre male narrator.  And the twist wasn’t anything special.  I feel like the hype around these twisty thrillers is killing them early for me.

Intercepted by Alexa Martin.  2/5.  Marlee is a football player’s long-time girlfriend, barely tolerated by the catty wives on the team.  When her boyfriend is revealed as a cheater, the surprise comes in time with the arrival of Gavin Pope, the new quarterback--who happened to share a steamy night with Marlee years ago.  So.  I wanted to love this.  But Martin uses a ton of hashtags in Marlee’s inner narration, and Gavin is less of a character than he is a random good guy.  Everyone bad was cartoonishly bad.  Everyone good was bland.  The sexual tension was nice though.

Daisy Jones and The Six by Taylor Jenkins Reid.  4/5.  In the format of interview transcripts recorded for the sake of a book, we explore the rise and fall of Daisy Jones and The Six, one of the most popular rock bands of the 70s.  Daisy is a tornado, beautiful, talented, and hopelessly addicted to several different drugs when she runs into The Six, an established band that catapults into another level of fame when she joins. The band is full of dueling personalities--but no one clashes with Daisy more than lead singer Billy.  Fresh off of beating his addictions and devoting himself to his wife, Camila, and their young family, Billy finds an artistic partner in Daisy like no other.  But the tension between them can go nowhere good.  This is the first great book I’ve read of the year--and it’s funny because I’d nearly given up on the author.  This is either close to or at the quality of The Seven Husbands of Evelyn Hugo.  Reid just needs to write books about the lives of fake old school celebrities for all eternity.  Is the band clearly based off of Fleetwood Mac?  Oh, yes.  But it’s fucking addictive.  Many of the characters are fleshed out--I loved Karen, the independent keyboardist who was really Daisy’s opposite but never acted like a Superior Feminist--but this is Daisy and Billy’s book.  This is the kind of relationship I fucking love: the longing is there, and they kind of hate each other because they want to cross that line so badly but can’t.  It’s not just a matter of a love triangle, either, which I love--the story may have been much simpler if Daisy and Billy weren’t addicts, and if he wasn’t sure that she would ruin his sobriety.  Shout out to Camila, Billy’s wife; she could have been typical and long-suffering, but there was just enough of an extra something to make her whole.  The ending was a bit sudden.  That was my main issue.  But it didn’t take away from how much I loved the book.  Can’t wait for the TV adaptation.

An Anonymous Girl by Greer Hendricks and Sarah Pekkanen.  3/5.  Jessica is a starving makeup artist, barely making it by.  So she can’t resist the opportunity that falls into her lap when a client drops out of a paid research study.  Taking the client’s place, Jessica becomes Subject 52 in Dr. Shields’s study on morality.  As the questions in the study become increasingly intense, Jessica becomes wrapped up in Dr. Shields’s true motives--which are much more personal than professional.  This is a very standard thriller.  As with their previous novels, the writers create a well-paced and engaging story, even if the characters are more fun devices than fleshed-out people.  The issue with this one is that there is not only really no twist, but zero surprises.  You’ll see every single beat coming.  It was just a bit paint by numbers.  But I liked it well enough otherwise.

Kingdom of Ash by Sarah J. Maas.  2/5.  The last book in the Throne of Glass series, because you have to finish things sometimes, right?  (Even though I didn’t read the preceding book because it was about Chaol and I don’t hate myself.)  The thing about Maas is that I think she can write perfectly respectable trashy fun wish fulfillment stuff, but it just starts to take itself so fucking seriously.  And she added so many characters over time, and everyone had to have a (heterosexual) romance.  I mean, even her lone bisexual character ultimately ends up in a hetero relationship.  Not sure what that means.  Also: every time she calls a dude a “male” because he’s a fairy, a part of me dies inside.

Bloodleaf by Crystal Smith.  2/5.  Aurelia is a princess, loathed by her own people due to her supernatural abilities, and betrothed to the prince of a neighboring kingdom.  After an assassination attempt exposes her to the people’s wrath, Aurelia is forced to flee her nation in disguise.  She finds a surprising amount of freedom in her new home--but plots surrounding the crown follow her everywhere, and threaten the new life she’s forged.  Basically, this one is just like..  I don’t know.  The second star is an effort star, for sure.  This is technically a Goose Girl retelling, though there is very little that bonds it with the original tale.  Which is fine.  What isn’t fine is Aurelia.  Within 60 pages, I was very tired of her nonsensical actions and total petulance.  I had no idea why she was making the choices she made.  The story is also rather vague--though we’re presumably flitting between two different countries, the basic differences are “one is okay with magic, the other isn’t”.  I also really didn’t understand the structure of Aurelia’s homeland, wherein people could basically like.... threaten the princess’s life on the regular while also not wanting to overthrow the entire royal family in general?  And this is like, the rabble we’re talking about, not nobles.  It didn’t super make sense as it was explained.  I wish this was a better one.

My Lovely Wife by Samantha Downing.  4/5.  A married couple in an upper middle class neighborhood keep their marriage alive through a particular fetish--that happens to revolve around getting away with murder.  It’s hard to discuss this one without giving much away.  It’s actually told from the (nameless) husband’s perspective, which would annoy me more if it turned out the way I thought it would.  Because the wife, Millicent, is so vibrant and so very good at what they do compared to the narrator, I thought that this was heading into Gone Girl territory.  And indeed, I did predict a few twists that made it look that way even more.  I can’t say much more than to finish with the fact that just when you think the novel is going towards one ending, the final sentence happens.  A fun, compulsive read with very horrible human beings as the leads.  My brand!

[kiruuuuu]

Blitz/Rook oneshot in which they’re on the beach. (Rating G, fluff fluff fluff, ~1.6k words) - written for @magehir because it’s been too long since I wrote your favs being adorable 💕

.

Coming to the beach was a good idea, Blitz concludes. Even if it might not be the beautiful Mediterranean sea and even if they’re not in as desperate a need for a splash in the cool water as they were the week before when they half-heartedly made plans until Sledge actually looked up the shortest way to the sea from Hereford, it was still very much a brilliant idea. Blitz was hesitant at first since he’s not someone who prefers going on vacations to the beach, he’d rather explore the rest of the world and marvel at all the wonders it offers, so an accumulation of sand on Wales’ shores isn’t high on his list of must-sees – but they’re only staying for one weekend anyway. Besides, everyone else’s good mood is contagious.

Not everyone was interested, not everyone got the chance to join them and so they’re mostly comprised of the GSG9, SAS and a few others who share small holiday apartments into which enough beds have been crammed that they house up to five people each though they’re admittedly so crowded it’s hard not to trip over each other when they’re all present. Blitz is rooming with the younger operators, namely Mute, Rook and Glaz, the trio which sticks together like glue, Mute with biting yet entertaining sarcasm, Rook with unending enthusiasm and Glaz with fierce loyalty and patience. The German has become fond of them and watching them desperately trying to protect their sandcastle is a joy.

They earned some mocking remarks upon Glaz announcing the three of them would spend the better part of the afternoon engaging in an activity more suited for kids, though when Smoke jokingly called them manchildren, Mute drily countered that they at least don’t literally start crying whenever a wasp lands on them and successfully prevented all further attempts at making fun of them by simply pointing out an easier target. Blitz could barely hold back a grin whenever someone made a buzzing sound near Smoke’s ear.

So the younglings were free to buy spades and spend an inordinate amount of time on planning where to actually erect their pleasure palace, judging the markings of the tide but also keeping a future thrill in mind of having to defend it against the rising flood – if they built it where the sea wouldn’t reach, there’d be no danger, yet if they built it too low they’d risk being overwhelmed too early. This is when Blitz left them to it, wishing them the best of luck and gallivanting off with Sledge and whoever his friend dragged along.

When he came back a few minutes ago, he was greeted by an impressive structure, the design undoubtedly decided by Mute though the other two decorated and adorned the plain sand with seashells, algae, cuttlebones and even a dead jellyfish on a throne overlooking their efforts. And as sightly as it is, right now it’s being threatened by the approaching tide, every other wave filling up the first moat around the structure and clogging the drain with more sand, necessitating Rook to try and shovel it free in between jumping away from the saltwater with a shriek.

“How long do you think it’s going to hold up?”, Blitz addresses no one in particular, hands pushed into his pockets as he watches the bustling from only a few steps away, a smile playing on his lips.

“As long as we don’t give up hope!”, Glaz replies passionately and reclaims one of his feet which had begun to slowly get stuck in the wet sand.

“I’m never giving up”, Rook adds with a decisive nod while aggressively paddling the water out of the moat with his spade, “if need be, I’ll go down with it.”

“The moat won’t do much like this, we can try to build an impromptu wall and re-dig it while it holds off the waves”, Mute suggests and immediately begins delegating, starts to dig with a ferocity he’ll indubitably feel the next day. “Did the others bore you to death or did you come here to laugh at our efforts which will be inevitably in vain?”

“Neither nor”, Blitz responds. “James and Seamus wanted to go drinking in a local pub and are currently part of a shirtless push-up contest which I did not want to be part of.”

The digging stops, as expected. The three throw each other a series of meaningful glances that amuse Blitz to no end while a wave, uncharacteristically unnoticed, tears down the small lumps of sand designed to be a wall but ending up as a sad excuse instead. He feels his eyebrows rise the more pained Mute and Glaz glance at their companion who eventually rolls his eyes with a sigh. “Go ahead, then.”

“Which pub?”, the young Brit wants to know and Blitz readily gives him directions, acutely aware of how nonchalant Glaz is trying to look. “Ta, I owe you. Let’s go, pine cone.”

Blitz extends a hand and accepts Glaz’ spade, watching after the two hurrying up to the promenade from where he came just a few minutes prior.

“You’re a bad liar”, Rook tells him and he doesn’t need to turn around to hear the grin in his voice.

“I was telling mostly the truth.” The Frenchman’s cheeks are an endearing shade of red and Blitz’ follow suit despite how much he tries to suppress it. “They weren’t shirtless though. Still, the two will probably get an eyeful regardless.”

“And you get to protect Queen Squishy with me. Come on, start shovelling.” They both pick up the pace, Blitz familiarising himself with the feel of his tool first before he begins complying with Rook’s orders. The sea is moving in more insistently now, daring them to divert their attention for a second so it can flood their shoes but they manage to stay alert for now. During a lull in conversation which centres mainly on their immediate task and sometimes includes tangents about the trip itself, Rook looks up and asks quietly: “Did you really just want to spend some time alone with me?”

They both know the answer to it – how could they not when it’s this multifaceted, pre-emptively provided by a series of conversations begun casually in the presence of others and ended sometimes in the dead of night, in hushed voices, in one of their flats because they somehow stuck together like velcro and separating would’ve been too much effort for too little reward. And so they gravitated along before realising that no, normally, people don’t talk about their favourite childhood cartoons while lounging on the floor, propped up against perfectly fine furniture and trying to throw M&Ms into each other’s mouths. The answer is comprised of shy glances, standing just a tad too closely, faces lighting up for no reason other than seeing a certain name in their phone’s notifications. It feels flighty but isn’t, it’s a bird which returns when called but otherwise stays just out of reach. And Rook just called it to make sure it’s still there.

It is. Blitz nods. “I did”, he says. “And I still do.”

The swears Rook shouts across the beach when the first cold splashes get absorbed by his socks make Blitz laugh so much he has to stop trying to save the second moat for a few seconds. It doesn’t take long until he, too, notices his soaked trouser legs caked with wet sand and from then on, it only goes downhill. Walls fall after being eroded by the merciless sea, moats are flooded and ornaments washed away despite their best efforts. Blitz’ arms hurt and he tastes the salty air on his lips, grimaces at the way his shoes start squelching after a while. Queen Squishy sadly witnesses the fall of her kingdom, bravely awaiting the moment she, too, gets carried away by the neverending flood.

He gets caught up in Rook’s joyous energy nonetheless, smiles at his squeaks and yelps, grins whenever he lets out a heartfelt curse and soon they’re both giggling and dramatically narrating the castle being swallowed by The Deep, describing in detail how some residents spontaneously develop the ability to breathe underwater and realise this is where they belong. This is where they should’ve been all along.

And they look at each other with a spark in their eyes.

Eventually, they fail. It was inevitable when they chose their spot, allowing future generations of sandcastle builders to try their hand at the impossible and though the whole endeavour should feel futile, has an air of nihilism to it, there’s more. Because while it seems as though all they have to show for an entire afternoon is sand in Rook’s hair, wet feet and aching muscles, memories can’t be quantified nor seen. And so the result is rich and worth all the effort.

“She got a burial at sea”, Rook says wistfully. “Befitting a monarch.”

The grin they share is pure and familiar and knowing and Blitz’ gaze is drawn to the way the young man’s lips bend around his next words even though he catches none of them, his brain too preoccupied with a question – a question which, once having entered his mind, demands immediate satisfaction, declares itself highest priority and so Blitz has no choice but to give in. He does not yet think of returning to their tiny flat, taking turns in the shower, washing off the sea clinging to them and maybe having some time alone still. He does not yet consider the possibility of cuddling in a bed or leaning against each other on the sofa.

Because right now, he’s content with knowing that yes, Rook’s lips do, in fact, taste of salt and sun and intimacy. Just as he thought.

[vorthosjay]

Let’s Talk About The Race, Part 2

Today we get Ixalan’s finale! While we don’t get much closure, we definitely have some interesting hooks! As always, read The Race, Part 2 first, or a whole lot of this won’t make any sense.

Note: Alison Luhrs confirmed on Twitter that there are no major plans between now and the story’s return. Sadness.

Swamp by Christine Choi

I’m cutting this song verse up a bit so we can get just the song and not the text around it.

"A castle grows in Old Below," 

"Its windows shine with an ancient glow, Some wander its maze, a mess of decay—"

". . . and the Kingdom of Rot will rise one day."

This is obviously a reference to Pride of the Kraul, but does that mean that was part of Vraska’s plan, or were the Erstwhile a legend among the Golgari that Mazirek happened to know the truth of?

I don’t think they were part of Bolas’ plan.

Jace's voice was slow with sleep. "Breeches taught me a song."

"The one about figs?"

"It's a rude song. Very rude. He's a rude little goblin."

Breeches is the best goblin, and he better be okay.

Perhaps she'd ask him on a date when all this was over.

Uuuuuuuugh.

Fine. Whatever.

Ugh.

Vraska was still fuming. "That damn vampire must have learned what I did to that other captain. We shouldn't have left the crew alive."

Jace sighed. "Objectively, you're not wrong."

Objectively, that’s the most annoying way to put something, Jace. You’re implying subjectively she’s wrong, but making it seem like you’re agreeing.

"This may take some time," Huatli said.

It took nine hours.

Extremely narrator voice.

The greatest warriors of the Sun Empire never killed, but they would never let a hungry beast go without a meal.

That seems like a rather large, hypocritical loophole, given you summoned dinosaurs to eat her.

Also, note, Vona hasn’t actually been killed yet, since Huatli pulled a Bond Villain on her and walked away.

"It is part of the land around it, yet separate, to keep it hidden. It does not move, but the way to it is enchanted to change . . ."

This is an interesting tidbit that might have been glossed over. What does this actually mean?

It’s part of the land... but not?

I have some thoughts, but I’m not sure how much emphasis to put on them yet. Given the enchantment that prevents planeswalking, it seems like some extraplanar shenanigans going on here.

Huatli was about to demand answers, but Angrath spoke calmly and resolutely. "Whatever prevents us from leaving this plane is locked in that city. We can help each other escape to different worlds if we find it."

Notice his language: Locked in. Not hidden in, not contained in, not protected in. Locked in.

Spectacular, she thought to herself, the murder monster wants to be my friend.

Angrath is for sure a black-red planeswalker.

"It is home to more than just the Immortal Sun. Whatever enchantment keeps us here is in there, too," she heard from behind her.

This point has been repeated, so it’s worth noting. Ixalan’s Binding and The Immortal Sun are related to one another, but aren’t the same thing.

"It may," Vraska said. "It may also give eternal life without need for the ingestion of blood. It may make the Sun Empire undefeatable. It may be a wellspring of unimaginable power too precarious for any person to control."

"I think it's something that's not supposed to be here," Jace said. "Something introduced to this world."

Jace’s comments are telling. The Immortal Sun is almost assuredly not from Ixalan.

Which either makes it an outside object of great power...

Or a creature like a planeswalker (or one brought here by a planeswalker).

"Someone must have arrived at the city first."

Given the timing of everything, Kumena seems the likeliest candidate, no?

The bellow of some giant beast sounded over the shaking of the earth.

Vraska froze, the primal noise sending a jolt of terror through her heart. Her dread only intensified when she heard a similar sound of equal volume . . . then another . . . and another.  

Something had awoken.

Oh geez, where have we heard a scenario like this before?

She saw a young man, his face erased, stumbling among a garden of statues. High above the man a growing cloud of dusk attacked the sun. From somewhere outside the garden there was a mighty roar.

The Hand That Moves prophecy has come true!

As to what that roar is? It’s a dragon, people, get with the program. Everything is pointing to a dragon associated with Orazca. In case you need a referesher:

The city itself had opened like the petals of a flower. True to its name, the structure itself was a perfect, untouched gold, ornamented with turquoise, amber, and jade. Its ramps and walkways led over churning rivers and waterfalls, and high above were strange symbols and motifs carved with care.

And here’s the picture from today and the RIX Key art for comparison.

Art by Wesley Burt

So there are a lot of questions here. Why so much gold? Where did Huatli get the dragon banner? Why is there an Ugin-looking Mural, and why was there a giant beast’s roar as the city was opened up?

The fact that it opens up like a flower petal also seems interesting. As is the fact that it’s not really a city so much as one, giant, city-like artifact. And it was sunk deliberately, it wasn’t destroyed in a great cataclysm.

Azcanta wasn’t built like that, so why would Orazca be? I’m honestly circling back to my earliest thoughts, in that Orazca is a prison. Orazca is actually massive, probably around the size of the Dragonskull Summit... which makes me think there’s been a sleeping dragon trapped inside. Perhaps a third dragon planeswalker, as Ixalan doesn’t seem to be intended as a trap for planeswalkers. Maybe Ixalan’s Binding is specifically to keep the Immortal Sun on the plane, while it is planebound in the Dungeons of Orazca.

Unfortunately, we’re still missing pieces of the puzzle. I’ll be assembling all the pieces we have in a big piece for MTGS in the next couple weeks.

Jace's memory was returning all at once, returning as a flood and spilling over the sides, and he would soon remember everything about what Vraska was. He would soon remember their grudge, remember her guild, remember his job, and then none of what had happened over the last few months would matter. He would remember he was the Guildpact and she was an assassin and their friendship would certainly dissolve.

I mean, he was sleeping with a woman who had all his friends assassinated just a couple months ago, and was an interplanar gangster himself. I don’t know how much room Jace has to judge.