#(kabru-ass behaviour. again.)

[yuri-puppies]

like my first impression of him as i speedran the manga was just utter bafflement, he was growing on me but i just didn't understand what was going on with him at all and i couldn't predict what he'd say or do and i knew i was missing something and then i read the adventuring party and it took me out at the knees /oh, he's also autistic/

and the more i learned about him the more i couldn't look away from him, and then sea serpent came out and it hit me that he looks like me, he has my curly hair and my big intense eyes (but blue) and my mom's skin and his face moves like mine

and i can't stop learning about him and thinking about him and then i find out he shares my birthday????? and i've tried so so hard to be an Adult Who is Normal About Their Birthday but it's his birthday too????

and then. i'm reading the metas. the conciliating and calculating and overthinking, the messiness and disordered eating and survival responses. the interest in narratives and political ramifications and the crafting of masks. the. fuckign. same curry order for fuck's sake.

how can i do anything but love him?

i give myself a lot of shit for being so obsessed with kabru but on second thought, coming into a show because i heard there were lesbians and fixating on the only brown man in the main cast is an incredibly me move