#(just like how the mandy thing went down)

[mewhenimanangel]

need that, hamzahthefantastic

pt.1* next

—synopsis. mandy invites you to hangout with some of her friends. christmas vlog vid

notes 🫧: guys i need hamzah bad

— 🐞

you sighed with content as you finally landed on an outfit you liked. it was a plain long sleeve with a pair of loose dark wash jeans, you weren’t sure what everyone else would be wearing so you picked something simple.

your phone buzzed, mandy asking if you were on your way to her house. you sent her a voice message as you threw on your coat and grabbed your keys along with your purse and phone.

mandy had invited you over to hang out with her, martin, and hamzah and his friends, who you knew from 4freakshow.

you'd never met chase and claire before, but you've hung out with martin and hamzah a few times with mandy.

you met her when she was in nursing school, becoming friends after a few awkward encounters. she introduced you to martin and after a while you met hamzah, in person at least, since the two of you already followed each other.

you parked your car outside their house and adjusted your lip gloss in the rearview. you were a little nervous for some reason. maybe it was the fact that you were late, maybe it was the new people you were meeting, or maybe it was the vlog.

you have your own youtube channel but being apart of other people's videos always made you feel a little awkward.

you texted mandy that you arrived and headed for the front door, martin opening it before you could knock.

"someone's a little late" martin joked as he let you inside. "oh my god i forgot you guys went bald. that was a freaking jumpscare." you teased.

mandy came up to give you a hug "i know, they look insane. i did not approve." she said  before you were introduced to chase and claire. chase walked up with the camera, focused on you. "hi youtube" you stuck out your tongue.

"now that y/n is finally here, the trio outfit is complete." claire handed you a set of pajamas, matching the ones her and mandy had on. you grinned and complimented the set before hamzah came out from the back hallway.

"oh hey, didn't know you got here already" he dapped you up. "boi yes you did, literally went to the bathroom to fix his hair" claire teased. "oh wait..." chase joined in, making you laugh.

"i don't know why he's got this freaking tuque on anyways. embrace the bald dude, embrace the skin." martin pulled his beanie down and rubbed hamzah's bald head, urging hamzah to push him away.

"yo! he just fucking sniffed me" hamzah laughed, grabbing his beanie from his hand. "we're just cucking the viewers i guess" martin said, leaving everyone just staring at him awkwardly.

"yeah anyways, y/n you could go change in my room" mandy told you. "heh, just be careful what you find in there" martin leaned into a shrug. "dude stop" hamzah flicked his hand over martin's head.

once you were changed, chase made you do a twirl for the camera and you posed before tripping out.

"so how come y/n gets a pajama set, but you said no to me?" martin asked mandy. "cause she's one of the girls and you're not a girl"

"plus nobody told you to wear them freak ass leggings boi" hamzah teased him and you laughed. he looked over at you, taking in the fact that he made you laugh.

hamzah always thought you were really pretty and cool, even back when you first followed each other during the 4freakshow days. you didn't even have a youtube channel back then, only posting random tiktoks he thought were funny.

"alright y'all let's get to baking, i'm hungry" chase said behind the camera before flipping it towards him.

you stood next to hamzah as claire pulled up the recipe on her tiktok and her, mandy, and chase got started on measuring things out.

“you can’t just do it willy nilly style brah, measure it” you told martin as he began pouring sugar into the mix. “sometimes you have to live life on the edge, y/n” martin scoffed.

as you continued baking the cookies, you realized how glad you were that you decided to come. martin and hamzah were always a hoot but you really liked claire and chase too.

“noo it was my legs and he said ‘you’re scratching your ass’” claire defended herself from chase and hamzah’s teasing. “girl no i was right behind you”

“we’re having booty cookies” “we got fucking booty flavor” you and hamzah joked at the same time, causing you to crack up and slap his arm.

you took your hand off, not expecting his bicep to be so strong. he nudged you with his elbow, still laughing.

“so, are you actually gonna help bake, y/n?” chase playfully raised his eyebrow. “right, standing here doing nothing” hamzah added. “oh bitch says you, who’s actually done nothing. mr. nonchalant baldhead.” you joked, grabbing the camera from chase and putting it in hamzah’s face.

“boi get outta here boi” he laughed.

while the cookies baked, you guys moved on to putting up the christmas tree. you sat down with chase and claire and began unfolding the branches of the tree. hamzah followed suit, taking a seat on the floor next to you.

rudy walked up to hamzah, who grabbed him with one hand under his belly and placed him in his lap. “awww rudy, who’s a cutie cootie coo. ah poochy poochy poo” you reached over hamzah’s leg to pet the dog.

you scratched behind his ear, unknowing of hamzah staring at you while you did it. “alright let’s put in some freaking work guys” claire said and hamzah lifted rudy into the couch behind him.

“why do you literally manhandle everything that comes your way?” you teased. “like in the video where you’re flinging around fish” hamzah just chuckled in response.

“wait chase, i like your leggings” claire said from behind the camera. “what these aren’t leggings?”

“i’m just saying i’ve never seen a boy wear leggings, it’s a compliment”

“they’re not leggings, they’re thermals! they’re long johns..long johns?” martin retorted, displaying his leg out in front of the other. “you’re wearing fucking leggings”

you and hamzah stifled your laughs in the corner as they continued and martin teared up, walking off with the camera as a bit. “claire you actually made him cry” you giggled.

you felt hamzah lean himself closer to you, taking advantage of the laughing fit everyone was in.

after a while, the cookies were done as you finished decorating the tree, adding a little christmas bunny along with everyone else’s personalized ornaments.

you turned around to hamzah manspreading on the couch, trying to ignore your thoughts about how sexy it was and followed everyone else into the kitchen.

you all iced the cookies before doing a taste test, “boi crumbl cookie could neverrrr” you joked, as the cookies actually turned out bad. “this shit is way too sweet oh my god” hamzah said, spitting his into the trash. “ew dude have some manners” martin scolded him.

once mandy ended the vlog, you all lounged around her living room until you got a emergency text from your roommate.

“bruh, my roommate messed up something with our dryer. i have to go” you frowned. “awww noooo” chase frowned with you. “it was really nice meeting you” he said. “yeah, you’re funny as fuck” claire added. “oh i love you” you hugged her before getting your coat off the rack.

“im so glad you actually came” mandy said. “well thanks for inviting me” you playfully stuck out your tongue. “i’ll see you next time we hang out in like four to six weeks” you said, sarcastically. “ugh tell me about it” she smiled as you dapped martin.

hamzah came out from the bathroom, “you’re leaving?” he asked. “yeah my roommate needs help” you pressed your lips together. “oh…..it was cool seeing you though” he dapped you up, pulling you into a small hug. “you too” you smiled, holding his hand a little longer before your phone buzzed again.

“anyways merry christmas and happy holidays everyone! byeeeee” you closed the door behind you and head for your car.

lvryn

Liked by hamzahthefantastic and others

lvryn mini dump 💩

user omg is she the reason hamzah was acting so mysterious this video

user yall saw the way they were so close to each other this video

user love your whole life 😍

— 🐞

[arroganceisherfavoritecolor]

It’s hamzah birthday so birthday sex fic 🙏🙏🙏

birthday sex

ੈ✩‧₊˚How could you ever forget your boyfriends special gift for his special day?

warnings: mentions of alcohol, hamzahs a lil drunkity, bday sex obviii, bad grammar LOLLL

Hamzah was never the type to ask for things. That included gifts. Although his 23rd birthday was coming up, Hamzah didn't ask for anything from you. "I just wanna be with you, babe. That's enough for me" is what'd he would say anytime you asked what he had in mind as a gift.

So, Hamzah, you, Martin, and Mandy all went to Nobu. The night was filled with laughter and the joys of enjoying each others company. Martin and Hamzah, being the competitive best friends they are, challenged each other to see who could drink the most. This lead to Hamzah being pretty buzzed, as well as you who had more than a few shots. Drinks and hours kept passing by, everyone chatting and having a good time.

By midnight, Hamzah was ready to go home. The two of you stumbled in, giggling like children. It was only 12:15, but your drunkenness made you lose track of time. You and Hamzah took of your coats and shoes, setting them by the door. "I'm gonna go shower, babe" you said, kissing him on the cheek and walking to the bathroom. Hamzah went into your shared room and flopped down on the bed. He heard the water turn on and smirked to himself, his hazy mind flashing images of you in his head.

As Hamzah stared up at the ceiling, he realized something: you hadn't gotten him a gift. On a regular basis, you were one to spoil him with thoughtful gifts and sweet gestures. But today, there wasn't anything. Although he denied you getting him something (like every other time) he found it surprising that you actually listened. Its not that he felt uncared for, in fact, he didn't really care that much. He just found it to be surprising that someone so giving didn't have anything to give him on this special day.

"Oh, Hamzah?" Hamzah looked away from the ceiling and towards the bathroom door when he heard you. Immediately, he felt a sense of desire run through him. You stood there against the frame, a smirk on your freshly-washed face. Your hair was damp, the droplets of water sinking into the fabric of the black, silky robe you wore. Your skin was so clean that he could smell the cocoa butter scrub from where he was. Hamzah smirked and sat up on his elbows. "Yeah?" was all he could say as his gaze roamed your body, your curves on display even with the robe covering them.

"Do you wanna see your gift?" you asked, running your fingers along the neckline of the robe. Hamzah swallowed and nodded his head. "Yeah, I do. Come here and show me" he said, sitting up straighter against the pillows on the bed. Your smirk grew wider as you slipped the robe off of your shoulders. It hit the floor, revealing black lace lingerie underneath. Hamzahs eyes grew in surprise and delight, drinking in every detail before him. The black bra held your breasts perfectly, barely covering your nipples with its lace. The panties were the same, merely a string covering only your clit. Hamzah had shown you this particular set a few weeks ago. He had jokingly said that you should buy it for his birthday, with no expectation of you actually following through.

Hamzahs eyes only grew wider when you began to walk over to the bed. You straddled his hips, your thighs on either side of him. He could feel the heat of your skin and the wetness of your core through the lacy panties. Hamzahs hands began to slide up your sides as he leaned in to kiss you. As your lips intertwined, Hamzahs hands began to wander. He traced the delicate lace of your bra, his fingers brushing against your pretty tits. They went lower and cupped your ass, the fabric of your thong-like panties barely covering your anus.

You broke the kiss and smiled down at him. Hamzah could feel his heart swell at your radiant smile, a grin of his own spreading across his face. Your soft lips began to press kisses onto his skin. Hamzahs breath hitched, shivers being sent down his spine as he felt your warm breath on him. He tilted his head to the side, allowing you better access to his neck. "Can I unwrap my present, baby?" he asked, his voice still rough from the alcohol. That alone made your pussy throb. "Whatever you want" you said, beginning to suck a hickey onto him.

With that, Hamzahs hands went to your back and unclasped the bra. He let the lacy undergarment fall away, throwing it to the side somewhere. So much for his gift, I guess. As you gave him dark marks all over, you began going lower and lower. Hamzah took off his shirt, granting you more freedom for your mouth to roam. You kissed and licked his chest, giving him small love bites. You pressed a trail of kisses down the middle of his torso, following his happy trail down to his pants. Hamzah tangled a hand in your hair, looking down at you with hooded eyes. "What are you gonna do, baby?" he asked, slightly bucking his hips up to let you feel his bulge. You smiled up at him as you began unbuttoning his pants. "Whatever you want me to. I just wanna make you feel good."

Hamzah groaned, rubbing your face against himself. You slid his pants down his legs, leaving him in just boxers. Your teeth grazed his pelvis as you bit down on the waistband of his underwear. You pulled down his boxers, your teeth lightly scraping his skin. Hamzah threw his head back, your teasing only spurring him on further. His grip on your hair tightened. "Fuck, such a good girl for me. You wanna be a real good girl for me, baby?" he asked, rubbing your face against his thick, leaking cock. You nodded your head, in a daze at the sight of his dick. You were so eager to please him, so desperate to make him feel good. "Then wrap those pretty lips around this dick. Show me you're a good girl."

You wrapped your lips around his aching cock. Hamzah let out a low groan, already bucking up against your mouth. You looked up at him with a mix of submission and desire in your eyes. "Fuck, just like that" he grunted, his fingers tightening in your hair as he guided your head. "You're so perfect for me, so fucking good." You arched your back, ass in the air as you sucked him off. The sight of his dick in your mouth, those lacy panties leaving nothing to the imagination, was almost too much for him to handle. Hamzah threw his head back as you took him in the back of your throat. He could feel you tighten around his sensitive cock, your throat constricting around him.

Right when he felt his climax approaching, his balls tightening with impending release, he pulled you off of his cock. "Wait, stop," he panted, his voice ragged and rough. "You've got me so close already, but I don't wanna cum yet." He tugged your body up to where you were straddling him again. He gripped your ass, grinding his cock against your pussy. The lace of your panties gave delicious, teasing friction. "What do you want me to do now, baby?" you asked, your lips swollen and glistening. Your mouth was smeared in pre-cum and drool, leaving it to trickle down your tits. The sight of you eagerly awaiting Hamzahs next command had him throbbing desperately, almost painfully.

Hamzah slid his hands down to hook his fingers in the waistband of your panties. He yanked the delicate fabric down your legs, tossing them to the side along with your matching bra. Here you sat atop of him, your pussy drenched with arousal, nipples hard from the cool air. The musky scent of your desire filled his nostrils, making his head spin with lust. He gripped your hips and lined you up with his cock. "Ride me like you mean it. Show me you wanna make me feel good for my birthday" he said, gripping his cock to insert it inside of you.

You both moaned and groaned as you sank down on his cock. "Oh fuck yes, just like that," he panted, his voice strained with pleasure as you began to ride him "Ride that shit, baby. Take it deep, fuck yourself on my dick like a good girl." Hamzah watched, enraptured, as you bounced on his lap, your tits jiggling hypnotically with each roll of your hips. The wet, obscene sounds of your skin against the others filled the room. Hamzahs eyes widened as you gripped onto your own ankles, anchoring yourself as you rode him wildly.

Even with your new position, your legs began to grow weak. The feeling of Hamzahs thick cock inside of you and the way your thighs muscles were straining made it difficult to keep your oace. So, Hamzah gripped your hips tightly and fucked up into you. He leaned forward, changing the angle of his dick inside you. With each thrust of his hips, the head of his cock bumped against your cervix. It made you gasp and whimper, clench around his throbbing cock. You threw your head back and came with a loud moan, your juices gushing out and coating Hamzahs dick.

Despite your climax, he didn't stop for a second. He continued to fuck up into you, using you like you weren't just wearing $60 lingerie. You sat there on his lap like the good girl you were, letting him use you even though your pussy was almost aching from pleasure. Your eyes rolled into the back of your head, drool spilling out from your mouth. Hamzah groaned loudly as he slammed up into you one last time. "Gonna fucking fill this pussy up...FUCK!" His fingers dug into the soft flesh of your hips, holding you in place as he emptied his balls inside of you. He captured your lips in a rough kiss, making you swallow down his sounds. His hips twitched as the final sparks of his orgasm faded out. He broke the kiss and gazed up at you, male satisfaction written all over his pretty face.

All you could do was smile at him, barely conscious. "Did you...like your present?" you asked, out of breath. Hamzah nodded as he panted, stroking your warm cheek with his thumb. "Loved it, my pretty girl. Love you." Hamzah knew this was a birthday he'd never forget.

(happy birthday to bae! sorry dis was kindaaa rushed but super long and ik the picture i put dont really match but guess what I DONT CARE AAAH)

[shallowseeker]

#if she ever says hello in public to him again #dean is like !!!!#and sam is like ????? #also i fully believe that dean already knows about the crush by virtue of paying too much attention to cas's tv viewing habits #cas likes humans who are tender... and tough.. moving seamlessly between one and the other #wow i wonder who ELSE is like that#Youtube#also i NEED a fic about this#just so everyone knows (me)

#literally Cas's little crush on the anchor is truly so endearing!!!#and she thinks so too! he's a sweet and deeply earnest guy and she's charmed despite herself!!#also re: prev we really should include Cas's crush on the lady who presents the news more often in AUs#like that's so cute actually via @ilarual

Today, I'd like to say how absolutely adorable I find Cas's crush on the anchor lady.

Also/// Literally, sometimes Cas's earnest "smooth talk" works 200000% better than Dean's tryhard posturing???? WTH, Cas!!!

I mean. Good God, she goes from closed off

to

CAS: "you're tough one second...compassionate and tender the next..."

CAS: "Sorry I took up your time."

///

(blooming into a big smile, despite herself) "Wait..."

//

CAS: THANK YOU. And she throws him a bouncy lil' smile. }:]

[cup1dluvhss]

˖ . ݁𝜗𝜚. ݁₊ JEALOUSY JEALOUSY, written by cup1dluvhs

˖ . ݁𝜗𝜚. ݁₊ after reconnecting with one of your old high school friends, your boyfriend begins to act strange and distance himself from you. eventually, you confront him and find out the truth (request).

| warnings: kind of angsty, fluff, swearing

| taking requests!

you stared at the text you had sent to your boyfriend an hour before on your phone, your eyes scanning over and over the words under it reading ‘read’ in little gray writing.

the past month, hamzah had been acting weird. he was ignoring your texts or leaving them on seen, saying no to plans, and being short and quick with you in conversations, as if he had no desire to be around you in any way.

it had been keeping you up at night, your head replaying things you had said to him in the past few weeks that might have triggered his actions, but nothing stood out to you, and it was driving you insane.

it was there and then, while lying in your bed in your apartment, that you decided enough was enough. you weren’t going to let him continue to behave like this and not even give you a reason why, because frankly, you didn’t deserve it.

your relationship had always been positive, the two of you meeting each other halfway and always showing each other affection every chance you got, but you hadn’t ever argued like this before. you wouldn’t even call it arguing, though.

you snatched your car keys off the island and headed for the door, not really caring about the fact you were in your pyjamas and not looking in any way presentable, making your way down to the parking lot.

the drive to hamzah’s apartment was occupied with thoughts of what you were going to say, how you think he might react, and what exactly his excuse was for his sudden change in attitude. you were slightly nervous, because hamzah had no idea you were coming and you didn’t know how he’d react to you randomly showing up to his apartment when the two of you aren’t on the best terms.

however, you didn’t care. you were on a mission, and you needed to know the truth.

when you arrived at hamzah’s door, your knock was firm and your foot was tapping against the floor as you heard movement from inside his apartment, his footsteps slowly getting closer and closer.

when he opened the door, his brows furrowed at you, his expression clearly telling you he wasn’t overly pleased to see you. you also noticed that his eyes looked red and puffy, and his lips were swollen as if he had been crying. you shook off the thought, marking it down as unlikely as you cleared your throat.

‘y/n, what’re you doing here?’ hamzah said, his eyes travelling away from you as he scratched the back of his neck awkwardly, your eyes narrowing at him slightly.

‘can i come in for a second?’ you asked him, not giving him a chance to respond before you were pushing past him into his apartment, feeling him hot on your tail as the door quickly slammed.

‘okay seriously—what’re you doing here?’ he asked, his gaze steady as his brown eyes met yours, your arms crossing over your chest.

‘i’m your girlfriend, hamzah. you don’t sound happy to see me.’ you said, your expression looking unimpressed as he looked away for a second, his gaze returning to yours with his body language telling you he was slightly uncomfortable.

‘i am happy to see you.’ he mumbled quietly, watching you like a hawk as you scoffed, throwing your arms up in the air.

‘no, you need to tell me what’s going on right now. you’ve been distant the last month, and i don’t know if i’ve done something. if i did, please just tell me hamzah, because this is torture.’ you sighed, running a hand through your hair as you returned your attention to him.

he paused for a second, biting his lip.

‘the night we went to that bar, in the city.’ he said bluntly, his gaze flickering away from yours as your brows furrowed.

the night in the city? it took you a second to remember, but it eventually clicked. you, hamzah, mandy and martin had all went out a few weeks ago to a few bars, just to have fun and get drunk before hamzah and martin would get busy again. but what you couldn’t figure out was why exactly hamzah was upset over it, because it was a good night.

‘i remember, but why? i thought we had fun.’ you said, your voice soft as you stepped closer to him, his face falling slightly as it he didn’t want to say his next words.

‘we did—it was that guy you met, y/n.’ hamzah said, your mind trying to remember what exactly he was talking about, until it clicked with you again.

at one of the bars you went to, you met an old friend, zack, who you went to high school with. he recognised you, but your conversation didn’t last longer than two minutes, just catching up on life and what the two of you had been doing since graduation. but once again, this was what hamzah was upset about?

‘you mean zack? —the guy from my high school? hamzah, what do you mean?’ you said, shaking your head in confusion as hamzah eyes darted to the ceiling, avoiding your gaze as he let out a heaved sigh.

‘i don’t know, y/n. i just saw the two of you together and i freaked out. i mean this guy was talking to you about how he’s in law school, how much fucking money he’s making, and he was just so much better than me. i mean, i make fucking youtube videos for a living. not to mention he was hitting on you, as well.’ hamzah said, his words taking you aback slightly as your lips parted slightly, at a loss for words.

this whole time, hamzah was distancing himself because of—jealousy? jealousy of another man you hadn’t seen or spoken to in four years, and who you had talked to for less than five minutes. you weren’t going to lie and say it wasn’t slightly pathetic, but he was your boyfriend, and you knew you should comfort him instead of being an asshole about it.

‘hamzah, you have absolutely nothing to worry about. your the only one i want, and every other guy is completely irrelevant to me. i’m happy with you, and nothing could change that.’ you said, stepping closer to him and wrapping your arms around him, his head falling against your shoulder.

‘fuck—i’m sorry. i shouldn’t have ignored you like that, i don’t know what was wrong with me.’ hamzah mumbled, your face softening as you broke away from him.

‘is that why you were crying?’ you asked bluntly, his head snapping in your direction as his face fell, a slight smile sneaking onto your face.

‘i’m not weirded out or anything, i just wish you’d have talked to me about it.’ you said, watching him as he nodded, his eyes on the floor.

‘i know. love you s’much, y/n.’ he said sweetly, pulling you into his arms again as your wrapped your own around his body, your face buried in his chest as you hummed in response.

[screwitbaby]

naive

hamzahthefantastic x reader (fic)

day 2/7

[part 3]

summary: this is part two of my short story about the boys’ trip to curaçao (read the other one first, or don’t). hamzah’s getting you all riled up and mandy and martin begin to notice his unusual behavior with you.

contains: SFW content

wc: 2k-ish

~

You wake up to an empty bed and some part of you feels disheartened at the sight. The only evidence of Hamzah ever being there is the indent in the pillow and the shorts he borrowed folded neatly atop the mattress. You sit up to stretch, rubbing the remnants of sleep from your eyes. The digital clock on the nightstand reads 10:02 and you decide to get dressed.

When you grab your phone on the way out, you see a text message light up your screen.

morning :)

Your fingers hover over the keyboard, but before you can type out your reply, a pair of large hands grab your shoulders and you nearly launch into the ceiling.

"Fuck—Hamzah!"

He cackles at your scream. You slap his arm, immediately shutting him up as he rubs the spot to soothe it.

"Dumbass," you grumble.

"Good morning to you, too." The grin on his face doesn't fade for a second.

"Whatever.” You shut the front door and walk down the hallway alongside him. “When did you wake up?”

"'Round 9,” he yawns out. "Martin called me back and we got the room situation sorted."

He pulls his new key card out of his wallet and holds it between his fingers to show you. “Nice.”

Upon finding the hotel pool already chock-full of people, the two of you decide to meet Mandy and Martin at a restaurant they told Hamzah they'd be at. The GPS on your phone’s map gives you a hard time and you nearly walk into oncoming traffic with your nose deep in the screen. Hamzah reaches out to grab your forearm and pulls you back right as a taxi flies by.

"That was way too close," he says. Both of you breathe heavily at the realization that it could've ended way worse. "I think I know where it’s at anyway, just follow me."

"Sorry," you apologize, blushing. He smiles and shakes his head to dismiss your embarrassment. His hand stays on the middle of your back as he leads the rest of the way. The sparks you feel from his touch can hardly be ignored.

You get seated in a booth with the couple, who have already ordered some appetizers in anticipation of your arrival. The four of you dig into some sort of steamed veggie dish and catch up.

"Martin kept me up all night," Mandy says.

"Yeah, I got stamina." Martin nonchalantly shrugs.

"No, you literally passed out the moment you went to bed." She rolls her eyes. "I had to check if he was breathing, like, 5 times."

"She got yo lying ass, boy," Hamzah says, laughing with you. "I think I was snoring all night. Those drinks had me messed up."

"You weren't," you assure him.

"How do you know that?" Martin diverts the attention to you.

"Because someone was dead asleep and couldn't help his best friend get back into his hotel room," Hamzah replies pointedly. Martin sinks into his seat and takes a bite of food while pouting.

"So, you guys were stuck in the same bed?" Mandy asks, genuinely interested. "How'd that go?"

"It was—"

"We were—"

You look at each other and you nod your head, gesturing for him to talk first. He nods back and places his hand on your knee under the table before continuing. Your heart leaps to your throat.

"We were watching some show in Dutch that we couldn't understand until we knocked out."

"That's it?" This earns Martin a light smack on the arm from Mandy and a fiery glare from you.

"Was it the one with the bald dad and the ginger kids?"

"Yeah, how'd you—?"

"I watched it with Martin's mom the day before we came. It’s pretty popular here."

Hamzah's hand is still on your knee, occasionally running his thumb over your skin like it's the most natural thing in the world. You try to be attentive and contribute to the conversation, but it's a struggle when your mind is constantly wandering. When the waiter comes to take your orders, you choose something random off the menu because you were too lost in thought. You’re starting to think you need to be spayed because of how much this affects you.

"I can't believe we have to leave in a week," Hamzah says. You look up from the table.

"Don't remind me," you groan.

"I miss Rudy," Mandy admits with a sigh, "and Fish and Carl, of course."

"Every parent has their favorites.” Martin shrugs.

Your food arrives after some more chatter. Hamzah's hand leaves the spot on your thigh he’d slowly worked up to and you feel like you can breathe again. This trip has made you guys a lot closer than you ever anticipated, but it makes you wonder how things will be once you get back home.

“Wanna bite?” Hamzah whispers to only you. “It’s pretty good.”

“Lemme try.” You pluck a piece of omelette from his plate and bite into it. “Yum. Try mine.”

He shovels a scoop of your yogurt bowl into his mouth and hums. “Let’s split?”

“Yes, please.”

The meal ends with Martin paying for Mandy and Hamzah paying for you, in a surprise turn of events. You try to fight him back on it, but once he swipes his card without a word you know it's settled.

"All that YouTube money has gone to your head," you joke.

"I got fat stacks."

"Ew." You and Mandy cringe.

The couple walks ahead of you up the street and the two of you walk side by side.

"Was that alright?" Hamzah asks once the others are out of earshot.

"What do you mean?"

"Y'know, me paying." He nudges your shoulder. "It felt like the right thing to do."

"It did?" you ask, a smile growing on your face. "I didn't mind it."

"Good, good..." He walks with his hands in his pockets, kicking a rock every couple of steps.

"I actually thought it was cute."

He exhales through his nose, smiling at the ground. "Was it?"

"Yeah." You nod. "Thanks, Hamzah."

"No biggie."

You scrunch up your face and he laughs once he sees your expression. His laughter could cure even the most fatal illnesses, you're convinced. You take steps in unison for a bit—right, left, right, left—until he clears his throat to speak again.

"And, um," he starts, licking his lips. "When I put my hand on your leg..."

"Mhm?" You enjoy seeing the way his face contorts as he tries to find his words.

"Was that... alright, too?"

"I didn't mind it," you repeat.

He shakes his head and this time it's your turn to laugh. The tips of his ears turn red under his hat, making your heart pound at the sight. He fixes the hat tighter on his head and you fight the urge to tuck one of his stray curls behind his ear. Instead, you find that your feet lead you closer to his side, your fingertips brushing past his ever so slightly.

The couple eventually stops at a building and the two of you rush to catch up.

"We made it, kids," Martin says with a smile once you reach them.

"An art museum?" Hamzah questions as he reads the sign at the door. "Are we museum people?"

"We are now," Martin says, turning to walk inside.

"He's been talking about this since we landed," Mandy explains. "C'mon, guys."

Your group enters the museum and you look around at the historic paintings and sculptures from various Curaçaoan artists. Any and all doubt is washed from your mind as you make your way through the space, carefully observing art you haven't had the pleasure of seeing before. Hamzah follows close by, never straying too far as to not miss the way you react to each piece with 'oo's and 'ah's.

"Here's what we came for!" Martin points at a painting in the corner.

You walk closer and catch sight of a beautiful beach landscape. There's bright green shrubbery in the forefront, leading up to a peachy-toned sunset with tropical birds flying in the background. Mandy excuses herself to check out the gift shop and Martin huddles the three of you together.

"One day, I'm gonna propose to her here," he whispers. His finger traces the plaque below the canvas. You'd been to this beach the day you touched ground in Curaçao. It was the first thing you guys did, even before checking in at the hotel.

"Martin," you gasp, eyes wide. He shushes you and you lower your voice. "That's so sweet, oh my god."

"She walked right by it," he beams. "She has no clue."

"That's great, man." Hamzah clasps his hand on Martin's shoulder, giving it a squeeze. "She'll love it, for sure."

"I can't believe I'm gonna be a maid of honor," you squeal as quietly as you can. Martin shushes you again but you can barely contain your excitement, turning to Hamzah to find his eyes already on you.

"What makes you so sure it'll be you?" he teases.

"It will be." You raise your eyebrows, challenging him to say otherwise.

"As long as I can be best man."

You take a couple pictures of Martin standing next to the painting with his thumbs up, narrowly avoiding Hamzah's photobombing attempts. When you finally walk away, Martin motions for you both to zip your lips. You mime crossing your heart and make your way to the gift shop.

There's shelves of souvenirs with prints of the art pieces from the museum, as well as some nearby tourist attractions that you recognize from visiting recently. You get to the jewelry section and run your fingers across the array of bangles and necklaces, hearing how they jingle as they move. Once you get to the end of the table, you notice a reddish-brown beaded bracelet.

"'Handmade,'" you mumble, reading the tag.

Hamzah stops close by your turned back and sees what's caught your attention from over your shoulder. "What's that?"

"Isn't it pretty?" You slip the bracelet onto your wrist and hold it up to show him. He grabs another one, doing the same.

Mandy suddenly calls for you and you walk over to her.

"I want this book so bad." She holds up a leather bound book with golden letters on the front, flipping through the pages to reveal photographs of nearby landmarks. "Wouldn't it look cute on our coffee table?"

“We have so much stuff from this trip already—“ Martin starts, but upon seeing Mandy’s glare, agrees.

You conclude that married life would suit them very well.

Your group loiters around the museum until you've seen everything it has to offer, snapping a few pics of your favorites along the way. Hamzah volunteers to take a few aesthetic photos of you, but when you get your phone back, your camera roll is full of him making funny faces. You know you’ll get him back for it eventually.

The four of you make it halfway back to the hotel when you look down and realize the bracelet is still on your wrist. You halt in the middle of the sidewalk and curse at the wind.

"Guys," you call out, making them stop as well. "I'll meet you there, I forgot to put this bracelet back."

"You stole?" Martin exaggerates. "Dang it, now we're all accomplices!"

"Say it louder, why don't you?" You roll your eyes, turning on your heels to walk back up the street.

"YOU STO—"

Hamzah slaps his palm across his friend's mouth, "I got it, don't worry."

"What?" You turn back.

He holds his free hand up and shakes the bracelet on his wrist. "I paid already. You don't have to go back."

You part your lips, but no words come out.

Mandy and Martin share a glance with each other, him mumbling something unintelligible. Hamzah drops his hands and fidgets with his hat.

"I feel bad," you finally say, your cheeks warming up uncontrollably. "You're too nice."

"I wish I had a sugar daddy," Martin complains. You collectively ignore him.

"Thank you, Hamzah," you say with a smile. "I appreciate it."

"You liked the bracelet, so..." He shrugs it off.

The walk back to the hotel commences and you feel your pulse thumping with each step. Once again, the couple get ahead of you two, but that’s fine by you. Mandy turns a few times to make eye contact with you and raise her eyebrows ridiculously. You just shake your head and try not to grin too hard.

The weather is muggy and the sun is beaming on your heads, but Hamzah’s warm hand finds yours despite it all. Your bracelets graze each other and you wordlessly make a pact to not let go.

~

a/n: u get what u want in the next part ya filthy animals!!! also sorry i took so long, i’m still not 100% happy w how this turned out but i wanted to pump something out before u guys start chasing me w wooden stakes and pitchforks :-)

[l1ndseyper3z]

Gallavich headcanons cause I'm tweaking out about them

- mickey loves bands (basically confirmed in 1-07 cause of the radiohead shirt) and the first time he heard I Love You by Fontaines all he could think about was ian so that's basically their song to him

- mickey runs cold, ian runs hot

- I kinda get the vibe that after a while Terry's death actually started fucking with Mickey kinda in the way Monica's death fucked with Ian. it made mickey get kinda clingy but Ian didn't mind

- in s5 when Ian broke up with Mickey. it was 100% self destruction, he'd seen Monica and didn't want to drag Mickey into what he thought he was destined to be

- ian calls mickey baby and anyone who teases mickey about it gets threatened cause mickeys a softie who will never admit it

- although Mama Milkovich canon is unclear, I think she died somewhere in season 1 after being ill for a while. it definitely fucked with mickey and I believe that's why he ended up hooking up with ian. he thought because she was gone he had no reason to live and was just winging life. he was definitely close with her

- some songs that make them think of each other are Arms Length - Sam Fender, Open Wide - Inhaler, The Craving - Twenty One Pilots.

- they're such girl dads this is not up for discussion

- I think they end up having one kid, a girl. mandys the surrogate and she basically ends up being mickey with red hair

- mickeys a big Eminem fan cause I said so and once he has his daughter mockingbird RUINS him

- I imagine the first time Mickey held his daughter he literally just sat there for hours in awe and all the Gallaghers were just like woah ian you've managed to break mickey what the hell

- they're such good dads

- if their kid ended up with bipolar they'd deal with it so well

- honestly they're the ones most likely to break the cycle

- ian is generally clingier but mickey doesn't mind. he actually quite likes it (although he'll never admit that out loud)

- ian fell first, mickey fell infinitely harder

- mickey gets quite emotional sometimes, I mean you saw how much he cried over ian. I think finally coming to terms with all the shit he went through hit him like a truck around the time terry died

- ian is big spoon

- cause they're little domestic bitches one of their favourite things is ian reading a book while mickey naps on him or next to him and ian messes with his hair with his free hand

- people act like they don't engage in pda but they TRADEMARKED pda

- mickeys too possessive to not like pda

- mickey and debbie plus ian and mandy. lethal

- ian loves seeing mickey fit into the family. family's a massive thing for the Gallaghers so seeing mickey blend right in makes ians heart melt

- ALSO seeing mickey do anything domestic like laundry or shit makes ian horny just saying

- mickeys scent 100% grounds ian. it's what he was around at the peak of his bipolar and it brings so much comfort to him

- hence why they share clothes so much

- mickey just likes robbing all ians shit cause why not and ian loves smelling mickey

- going back to if they had a bipolar teenage daughter mickeys literally the best dad ever

- needs a day off school cause shes struggling? absolutely let me call them.

- she feels like shit? come here we'll get comfy on the couch and watch a movie

- doesn't wanna take her medication? talk to me about it, tell me why and I'll explain why you should, we can try new stuff if you need it

- mickey hated ians black hair

- after they banged in prison for the first time they were lay there and mickey just went "why u not a redhead anymore? you look like a fucking idiot"

- part of him being such a good dad is because of terry but also because he's genuinely a gentle person deep down and it just took security and comfort to bring that out. plus he wants to make his mum proud

- everytime ian sees mickey with their daughter he just like falls into a puddle on the floor

- they visit Monica's grave every year. mickey doesn't really like her but he wants to make sure ian stays connected to her

- same with mickeys mum, they visit her a lot

- everytime they go into the Kash n Grab when they're in the southside they just giggle. it's so goofy to them now

- they see Jimmy Steve's dad out somewhere one time and they're both like 😦😦😦

- they're such bad influences

- always up to some dumb shit

- basically they're all of our parents and I love my sillies

[onlinesuzie]

☆ hooking up with hamzah ☆

words: 3.1k

genre: heavy smut, dom hamzah

summary: You are invited to a small party at Mandy's apartment but when you are introduced to Hamzah, you realise he's the boy you had the most insane hook up with and now obviously you can't resist the chance of hooking up again.

notes: i gotta be real, i gotta ring the police after this cause damn this is most insane thing i've ever written.

♡

You were sitting in your living room, half-watching TV when your phone buzzed with a message. It was from Mandy, one of your close friends.

"hey my love! i’m having this little party thing at my place this saturday, please please please can you come! martin’s bringing a friend… ;)"

You smiled at the message, feeling extremely excited. You hadn’t seen Mandy and her boyfriend, Martin, in a while, and the idea of a relaxed evening with friends sounded perfect. You quickly typed back your reply.

"i’m free!! i can’t wait to see you"

When Saturday arrived, you spent a little extra time getting ready, choosing an outfit that made you feel extra good. As you arrived at Mandy’s apartment, the familiar hum of music and chatter greeted you from inside. You knocked, and a moment later, Mandy opened the door with a wide grin.

"You made it!" she exclaimed, pulling you into a hug. The apartment was slightly hot from the people moving around and laughing loudly, it was filled with chatter and the slight smell of alcohol.

Martin was in the kitchen, mixing drinks. When he saw you, he waved. "Hey! come here and get a drink!" he said, motioning for you to come over. You exchanged a few waves and hugs of the people you knew, catching up on life since the last time you’d all hung out.

Mandy appeared beside you, practically bouncing around, probably already tipsy. "Oh, yes! I need to introduce you to Martin's friend!" she said, her eyes disappearing with how smiley she was. Without waiting for your response, she started grabbed your hand, leading you through the room.

As you followed her, you wondered who this friend could be. Mandy stopped near the living room, turning to you with a smile. "This is Hamzah," she said, gesturing to a man standing nearby. Your breath caught in your throat as you recognized him immediately. It was Hamzah—the guy you had hooked up with a few weeks ago.

His eyes widened slightly as he recognized you, and for a moment, there was a silent exchange between the two of you. He gulped slightly but finally breaking the silence with a small, amused smile.

"Hey," he said, his voice soft, with just a hint of teasing. "Nice to see you.. again." the last word quiet enough for only the both of you to hear.

You felt your cheeks heat up, but you managed a smile. "Yeah, you too."

Mandy, oblivious to the history between you two, grinned. "I’ll leave you to get to know each other!" she said before disappearing back into the crowd.

Once she was gone, you and Hamzah exchanged an awkward laugh. "This is... unexpected," he said, scratching the back of his neck.

You nodded, feeling the same awkwardness. "Yeah, definitely unexpected."

Despite the initial feeling, the conversation quickly found its rhythm. You and Hamzah started talking, easing into a comfortable banter. The more you talked, the more you remembered why you’d been drawn to him that night a few weeks ago. There was a spark between you, a feeling that was hard to ignore.

As the night went on, that spark began to intensify. You noticed the way his eyes lingered on you when he thought you weren’t looking, the way his voice dropped a little lower when he spoke just to you. You especially noticed the way he slowly swiped his tongue along his bottom lip when he looked you up and down. It was like there was a tension building pull between the two of you, something that had been there all night, just waiting to be released.

At some point, you found yourself standing close to him near the hallway, the rest of the party fading into the background. The air between you was tense, and you could tell by the way he was looking at you that he felt it too.

"Do you want to... go somewhere more private?" he asked, leaning in close to whisper in your ear.

Your heart raced at his suggestion, but you nodded, a shy smile on your lips. Without another word, you led him down the hall, toward the bathroom at the end. Once inside, you closed the door behind you, the small space suddenly feeling even smaller.

The moment the door clicked shut, the tension between you snapped. Hamzah stepped forward, his eyelids heavy and warmth grew within you, his hand brushing against your cheek as he leaned in. His lips found yours in a rough and sloppy kiss, the familiarity of it sending a rush of adrenaline through you.

As kiss got deeper, it was becoming more intense as the memories of that night came flooding back. His hands snaking their way to your waist, pulling you closer, and you responded by placing your hands on his chest , your fingers gripping the fabric of his shirt.

Time seemed to stand still as you lost yourself in the moment, the rest of the party forgotten. The thrill of being so close to him again, in this unexpected situation, was intoxicating.

Eventually, the sound of laughter from the party brought you back to reality. You pulled back slightly, both of you breathing heavily.

Hamzah smiled, his thumb brushing your cheek. "That was... so hot," he said.

You laughed softly, feeling a mix of excitement and satisfaction. "Yeah, but I need more of you Hamzah."

He chuckled, pressing a quick, playful kiss to your lips before stepping back.

You and Hamzah linger in the bathroom for a moment longer, catching your breath, exchanging a few soft laughs as the reality of what just happened sinks in. There’s a shared look between you. The party outside feels like a distant hum, irrelevant to the little world you’ve just created together.

Finally, you straighten your clothes, both of you taking a moment to collect yourselves. Hamzah glances at you, his smile soft and a little teasing. “Ready to head back out?” he asks, his voice low.

You nod, still feeling the warmth of his touch lingering on your skin. “Yeah, let’s go.”

Opening the bathroom door, you slip back into the hallway. The noise of the party floods your senses once again, but it’s as if there’s an invisible bubble around the two of you—nothing else seems to matter. You share a quick, private smile with Hamzah before heading back into the main room.

The two of you rejoin the party, and while you try to blend back in, you can’t help but notice the lingering gazes between you. There’s a silent communication in every glance, every touch. It’s not long before Hamzah leans in close, his breath warm against your ear as he whispers, “Want to get out of here?”

Your heart skips a beat, and you find yourself nodding without hesitation. The idea of continuing, of seeing where it could go, is too tempting to resist. Together, you make your way to the door, weaving through the crowd.

As you approach Mandy and Martin, who are chatting with a couple of other guests, you gently tap Mandy on the shoulder. She turns around, her face lighting up with a smile when she sees you. “You’re heading out?” she asks, her eyes flickering between you and Hamzah.

“Yeah, I think we’re going to call it a night,” you say, trying to keep your tone casual. But there’s no hiding the way Hamzah’s hand finds yours, fingers intertwining as he steps up beside you.

Mandy’s smile widens, a knowing glint in her eyes. “Well, it was great seeing you both! Don’t be weird, okay?” She pulls you into a quick hug, and then one for Hamzah, who exchanges a nod with Martin.

Martin gives you a thumbs-up and a wink as he notices your linked hands. “Take care, guys,” he says, clearly amused but in a friendly, supportive way.

You and Hamzah say your final goodbyes before slipping out of the apartment together. The night air is cool and refreshing after the warmth of the party. Hamzah leads you to his car parked a little way down the street, his hand still firmly in yours.

As you reach his car, he gets into the driver’s seat, and for a moment, neither of you moves. The quiet of the car is almost deafening, filled only with the sound of your breathing and the faint hum of the engine when Hamzah starts it. His hand rests on the steering wheel, the other on the gearshift, but you can feel his eyes on you, stealing glances as if he’s trying to gauge your thoughts.

You turn to look at him, your gaze meeting his in the dim light of the car’s interior. The tension is strong now, thickening the air between you. The memory of his touch in the bathroom, the way he made you feel weeks prior, is all too fresh. And by the way his eyes darken when they lock with yours, you know he’s thinking the same thing.

“Are you okay?” he asks, his voice low and rough, almost hesitant. It’s a simple question, but the weight behind it is heavy.

“I’m more than okay,” you reply, your voice soft but steady. There’s a slight quiver of excitement in your tone, something he doesn’t miss.

A small smile tugs at his lips, and his hand finally leaves the gearshift, sliding over to rest on your thigh. The touch is gentle at first, but you can feel the warmth of his palm through your clothes, the heat spreading like a slow burn. He squeezes lightly, his fingers flexing against your skin, and it takes everything in you not to shiver under his touch.

“You’re sure about this?” he asks, his eyes searching yours. There’s something deeper in his gaze now, not just desire but a hint of vulnerability, as if he needs reassurance that this isn’t just a fleeting moment.

You nod, feeling a surge of affection for him. “I’m sure, Hamzah.”

That’s all it takes for the tension to snap. He leans in, his lips brushing against yours in a kiss that starts slow, as if he’s savoring the moment. But it quickly deepens, his hand tightening on your thigh as he pulls you closer, the kiss becoming more intense.

You can feel the heat building between you, the way his touch becomes more needy, the way his breathing quickens. Your hands find their way to his chest, feeling the rapid thump of his heartbeat beneath your fingertips. It’s the kind of kiss that makes you lose track of time, of everything except the feel of him against you.

Finally, he pulls back just enough to look at you, his breath coming in short, ragged bursts. “Let’s get out of here,” he says, his voice rough with need.

You nod again, unable to find the words to express the whirlwind of emotions you’re feeling. He shifts the car into gear, his hand returning to your thigh as he drives, this time with more urgency, as if he can’t get you to his place fast enough.

His thumb strokes your skin absently, and every touch sends a jolt of electricity through you. It’s almost unbearable, this tension that’s coiled tight between you, ready to snap the moment you’re alone again. The city lights blur past as you drive, but you barely notice, too focused on the way his hand inches higher on your leg, teasing, testing you.

When you finally pull into his driveway, the tension reaches its peak. Hamzah cuts the engine and turns to you, his eyes blazing with desire and something deeper, something that makes your heart race even faster.

“Ready?” he asks, his voice a low, throaty whisper.

Instead of answering, you lean in and kiss him again, your hand sliding up the back of his neck, pulling him closer. It’s all the answer he needs. The kiss is hungry, desperate, as if you’ve both been holding back for too long. His hand on your thigh tightens, pulling you even closer, and you can feel the heat of his body radiating through the small space between you.

Breaking the kiss, Hamzah quickly gets out of the car, and you follow suit, both of you stumbling out. He takes your hand again, leading you toward the front door. The night is cool around you, but the heat between you both is undeniable, impossible to ignore.

The moment the door closes behind you, you know there’s no going back. The tension that’s been building all night finally has its outlet, and neither of you is going to hold back.

As you walked towards his place, you subtly moved closer to him, your shoulder brushing against his. You could feel the heat between you, and you knew tonight was going to be intense. Hamzah couldn't take his eyes off you, his gaze burning with desire as he took in your body.

You smiled to yourself, knowing the effect you had on him. Reaching his door, he fumbled with the keys, his hands shaking slightly as he struggled to focus. You placed your hand on his, a simple touch that sent a spark through him, as he guided the key into the lock.

The door swung open, and he stepped aside to let you enter first. You took a moment to glance back at him before stepping into the hallway. Hamzah followed close behind, his breath soft on the back of your neck, making your skin tingle.

You didn't turn on the main lights, opting for the softer glow of lamps instead. You turned to face him, your bodies now just inches apart.

Hamzah's eyes devoured you, taking in your every curve and the way your clothes hugged your body. You could see the desire and hunger in his eyes, which only further turned you on. Leaning forward, you pressed your body against his, feeling the hard planes of his chest and the stiffness of his cock through his pants.

His hands found your hips, pulling you closer as his mouth claimed yours in a passionate kiss. You moaned into his mouth, your tongue dueling with his as your hands roamed over his broad shoulders and down his back. You could feel his cock twitch against your stomach, and you knew he was just as desperate for release as you were.

Breaking the kiss, you trailed your lips down his jaw and neck, nipping and sucking at his sensitive skin. He tilted his head back, a soft groan escaping his lips as you marked him with your mouth.

"I want you," he whispered, his breath hot against your ear. "I need to feel you, all of you."

You smiled at his desperation. This wasn't the first time you had hooked up, but it was clear that Hamzah was still just as obsessed with your body as he had been the first time. And you loved having this effect on him.

Guiding him towards the bedroom, you pushed him gently onto the edge of the bed. He sat there, watching you with dark, wanting eyes as you slowly began to undress. You removed your shirt, teasing him by covering your breasts with your arms, before finally revealing them.

His breath hitched as your breasts were exposed, his eyes glued to you as you slowly unbuttoned your jeans. Sliding them down your legs, you stepped out of them, now wearing nothing but your underwear. Hamzah's cock twitched in his pants, straining against the fabric as he got a full view of your body.

Kneeling before him, you placed soft kisses up his thighs, your hands roaming over his hard chest as you undid his belt. With slow, deliberate movements, you unbuttoned his pants and pulled down the zipper, reaching inside to wrap your hand around his throbbing cock.

He hissed at the feeling of your soft hand on his hard length, his hips bucking slightly as you began to stroke him. You leaned in, pressing a kiss to the head of his cock before taking him into your warm, wet mouth. He groaned, his hands tangling in your hair as you sucked him deeply, your tongue swirling and teasing.

"Fuck, that feels so good," he murmured, his hips thrusting gently as you took your time, exploring every inch of him with your mouth. You moaned softly, the vibrations sending shivers through him.

Pulling off his cock, you stood up and finished undressing, revealing your naked body. Hamzah's eyes feasted on your every curve, his mouth hanging open slightly as he took in your perfection.

"You look even hotter like this Hamzah," you whispered, pushing him back onto the bed and climbing on top of him. You straddled his waist, your pussy hovering just above his cock as you leaned down to kiss him deeply.

He kissed you back hungrily, his hands grasping your ass as he pulled you against him. You aligned yourself with his cock, feeling the head press against you. Slowly, you sank down, sitting down on his length as you threw your head back in pleasure.

Hamzah groaned, his eyes rolling back as he filled you completely. You rode him slowly at first, savoring the feeling of him stretching you wide.

"Your body is so fucking perfect," he muttered, his eyes taking in the sight of your naked skin glistening with a light sheen of sweat. "I could worship this body forever."

His words sent a rush of heat between your legs, and you increased your pace, riding him harder as you clenched around his cock. He thrust up to meet your movements, his hips slamming into yours as he filled you completely.

The bed creaked with the force of both of you, your moans and groans filling the room as you drove each other wild. Hamzah's hands gripped your hips, his fingers digging into your soft flesh as he pounded into you.

"Cum for me," he growled, his voice husky and full of need. "Let me feel you cum around my cock."

His dirty words sent you over the edge, and you cried out as your orgasm washed over you. You clenched around his cock, enjoying the wave after wave of pleasure crashing through your body.

Feeling you tighten around him, Hamzah let out a moan, his cock twitching as he filled you with him. You collapsed against him, your breath coming in ragged gasps as you felt his warm release deep inside you.

For several moments, you lay there, your bodies entangled and your hearts pounding. Eventually, you rolled off him, a lazy smile on your face as you snuggled into his side.

"That was incredible," he whispered, his voice full of satisfaction as he played with your hair. "I can't get enough of you."

You smiled, knowing that this wouldn't be the last time you'd hook up. Hamzah was obsessed, and you were more than happy to give him more.

[darkficsyouneveraskedfor]

Frisky Friday thot?

You've caught the attention of not one gorgeous blonde, but two at one of Stark's parties. Each charming in their own way, they make room for you to sit between them and offer you a drink. One drink won't hurt.

Right?

Just a Drop

“You are such a buzzkill," Mandy snaps as she untangles the thin strap of her bag. "I'm tryna do something here and you keep whining that you're all alone--" 

You reel at your friend's harshness. She asked you to come. She even said she needed the moral support. After all, how could she go alone to one of Stark's infamous parties. She's so nervous, don't you know? 

"Sorry, but I don't know anyone but you--" 

"It's a party. Get out there," she retorts and pulls out her mirror compact. She checks her lips and flicks her lashes. "Now, if I keep Tony waiting, he's going to find someone else. So go. Plenty of people to mingle with." 

You sniff back your reticence and the sting of her tone. You nod and she spins on her heel and stomps back through the door. You contemplate leaving. Would she notice? Well, if she realises you ditched her, you would have zero friend in the city. 

You look down at yourself. You even let her dress you. The sweater is blush pink with sequins on it, but she was frustrated that it was so baggy. She paired it with a skirt even though it’s cold. She couldn’t lend you any of her clothes because they wouldn’t fit. The one thing she did give you from your wardrobe were the shoes. Heeled booties that make you teeter. 

You make yourself go back into the room. The voices hit you like a sonic wave. Everyone is so cheery and excited to see each other. It’s crowded and chaotic and you have no place there. It’s no different than you’ve felt your whole time in the city. Lost and alone. 

You set to wandering around. You’ll pace away the time until Mandy releases you from this purgatory. You shrink away from the woman you know to be Natasha Romanov. You tried to say hi but she looked at you as if she would swat you away like a gnat. Then there’s the men she’s with; they’re hulking, mean looking figures. 

You fold your arms and try to will yourself into invisibility. Certainly, given a number of your company, that can’t be entirely impossible. You pass behind the couch and something knocks against your elbow as you walk along the leather. 

You recoil and turn to rub your elbow as you watch the man touch his blond hair. Oh no. As he leaned back, you must have bopped him. You cradle your arm and cringe. 

“I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to,” you say as his blue eyes find you. It’s Thor. The god of thunder. He was one that Mandy was sure to point out; a backup plan, she proclaimed. “I didn’t see you.’ 

“Not to worry, lady. My own fault. I was being rowdy and did not think before I threw myself back,” he drops his hands. “I should be honoured to be battered by a woman so enchanting.” 

You blink. You’re not sure if he’s mocking you. Sometimes Mandy’s compliments turn out not to be. The man beside him glances back too. Oh, Steve Rogers. 

“Hey, you seem lonely,” he says, “who’d you come with?” 

“Oh, uh,” you look around. You don’t see Mandy. “A friend.” 

“A friend?” He echoes. 

“Yeah, but I don’t know where they went...” you trail off. 

“How improper of us, Rogers,” Thor reaches over to muss Steve’s hair before he stands. He turns and faces you over the couch, “my lady, I present to you Steve Rogers of Brookland.” 

“Brooklyn--” Steve corrects. 

“And it is I, Prince Thor of Asgard,” he touches his own chest as he booms, “would you do us the honour of joining us for a drink?” 

“Oh, a drink?” You squeak in surprise. “I hate to impose--” 

“Impose? We could use the company,” he assures you and waves you around. “Rogers, make room, you lump.” 

“Lump?” Steve mutters, though there’s a lilt of humour in his voice. 

You hesitate, swaying, then come around the long leather sofa. You don’t want to be rude. Especially to them. And it’s exactly what Mandy told you to do; mingle. 

Steve stands as you approach and gestures you down to the cushion between them. Thor remains on his feet as the other man sits with you. You peek over at the captain then up at the prince. 

“I’ll fetch us a round,” Thor declares. “I shall be fleet.” 

He turns and struts off. You stare after him and twiddle your fingers nervously. Your eyes skitter around. What do you say? 

“Not a big fan myself but Tony loves these things,” Steve says.  

“Oh, yeah, I’ve never... I don���t go to many parties.” 

“Well, you’re not missing out on much. I always end up dragging out the punchiest moron in the room. Unfortunately, that’s often my buddy.” He points and you follow it to the dark-haired man with Natasha; Bucky Barnes. 

“Oh, right,” you murmur. “That’s... too bad.” 

“He doesn’t even have a good excuse. They don’t serve anything he can get drunk on,” he snorts. 

Thor returns, giving you a start. He sets down three glasses on the low glass table across from you. “My lady,” he says and turns to sit, his weight shifting the couch. “The bar man says it is something fizzy. I can’t be certain,” he explains. “Rogers,” he turns to look at his cohort, “I’ve brought some of my home brew...” 

“Of course you did,” Steve scoffs. 

Thor reaches under his jacket and slips out a small flask. It’s gold and round, with elaborate patterning in it. He twists the cap and you feel a tug on your sweater.  

“I like this, it’s pretty,” Steve says. 

“Oh, uh, thanks.” 

“Yes, very becoming,” Thor adds as he pours into one glass, “and for you, Rogers.” He trickles more into another.  

You turn and look at the clear, bubbly drinks. Thor tucks away the flask and grabs two. He hands one to you. Rogers reaches for the third. 

“Thank you,” you accept the cold glass. 

“Skol,” Thor raises his glass. 

“Cheers,” Steve mirrors him. 

You look between them, feeling smaller as you feel their body heat brewing. You just lift your glass higher to let them clink it. You follow their lead, drinking when they do, though you nearly cough it back up. 

“Oh, bubbly,” you cover your mouth. Strong, you think. You don’t have the highest tolerance. 

“How long have you been in New York?” Steve asks, catching you off guard.  

“Oh, just about...” you tally in your head, “one year now.” 

“Wow, newbie,” he comments. You take another drink, just for something to do. 

“As am I,” Thor adds. “I do miss home but I like your planet too.” 

You nod and sip again. 

“Have you been to this place, Central Park?” Thor asks. “I was lost for a whole day.” 

“Imagine that, a whole god, lost,” Steve laughs. 

“Eh, I was off duty,” Thor argues. 

They banter back and forth and you’re all too happy to fade into the leather. You slurp tentatively. Mandy is still elusive. You suppose she managed to snare her game but what about you? 

As your eyes flit around the room, it seems to rock. You lurch forward in a sudden bout of dizziness and lean forward to put the glass down. You miss the table but the glass is caught from underneath. Thor takes it and puts it on the table. The ice hits the glass. You drank it all without realising. 

“Thirsty,” he remarks as you slouch forward. He pushes you back and Steve help eases you against the cushion, “are you feeling it?” 

“How much did you put in hers?” Steve hisses. 

“Just a drop,” Thor assures, “never worry, Rogers, I know as I am doing.” He pets your forehead as your head falls back under its own weight. You blink at the ceiling as your body slackens. “My lady, never fret. We are heroes, we will take good care of you.” 

[storm-angel989]

Vox and Val don't know how to hold babies. They get handed their newborn to get some bonding in and they're all "ok what now? I just hold it? Where do I put my hands?" Until Auntie Velvette gets sick of their bullshit and physically rearranges them into a proper baby holding position because "you don't have to hold them out so far away from you, they're not contagious" and "anything they have, you're gonna catch real soon anyway"

Ok that's my contribution for today

Hi friend, 

Oh I love this idea! My biggest struggle with this one was “where do Vox and Velvette and Valentino get a baby?” (because there is no baby store, let's be real) so it took me a while to chew on what I think is an entertaining situation. I hope you enjoy it!

<3 Mandy

Valentino didn’t hold babies. Not in life. And certainly not in death. In fact, he didn’t think the idea of children had ever been discussed in his relationship with Vox and Velvette. And when his phone rang and Asmodeus' voice called him, Vox and Velvette to his restaurant in the lust ring, the last thing he was thinking about was kids. 

“What does Ozzy want with the three of us?” Velvette asked as she watched the rolling hills of fire pass by as they jumped from ring to ring. 

“Fuck if I know,” Valentino replied as he took a drink of wine. “Any idea, Voxxy?”

“No,” Vox replied without looking up from his phone.

Velvette sighed in annoyance. “Well you two fuckers are no help.”

Both ignored her. Several minutes later, the limo pulled up outside one of the biggest restaurants in all of hell. As soon as they stepped out of the limo, they were escorted back to Asmodeous’s office.

“Who's a sweet little baby? Yes you are, yes you are!” Asmodeous’s voice floated out from behind his office doors. 

“Huh, didn’t expect him to have a caretaker kink,” Vox muttered. “Hey, ow!” 

Valentino elbowed him, hard and gave him a writhing look. 

“We don’t judge,” he said sharply. “Especially not Oz.”

“Judge what? Huh?” Fizzeroi’s voice floated as the doors opened. “Come in, dumb little…”

“Alright, that’s enough Fizz, calm down, you’ll scare the baby,” Ozzy said firmly. “Come in you three.”

The V’s exchanged glances but stepped inside. Of all of the sighs they expected to greet him, Asmodeous holding a tiny pink blanket wasn’t anywhere near the top of the list. Hell, for that matter, it wasn’t even on the list.

“Congraduation’s Valentino, you’re a father,” Asmodeous said as he stood up.

Vox and Velvette stared at Valentino in disbelief.

“That isn’t possible,” Valentino argued. “I always use protection, I…”

Azmedous stood up and walked across the room.

“In nineteen seventy three you made a deposit to a sperm bank. Upon your arrival in hell, our agents were supposed to destroy every single source of your DNA on Earth. It appears someone fucked up I mean…uhn…” he looked down at the baby, “made a mistake. This little girl is a product of that. And with her mother in heaven, she’s yours.”

“Wait, her mom died? Who was she?” Valentino demanded, taking a step back away from Asmodeus. 

“She did. And went to heaven. But as you know, unbaptized babies?” Asmodeous made a slashing motion across his throat. “Not welcome upstairs.  And upon this little one’s arrival, I went myself and personally destroyed the rest of the vial. But there is no mistaking, she’s yours. And by the contract you signed, she’s your responsibility, just like any other child who falls who has parents in hell. And I know you want to honor your contract.”

Asmeodous’s normally lighthearted voice dropped to a dangerously low tone. The fire that surrounded him perked up, and even Fizzeroli jumped from his shoulders. 

“Give me,” Velvette said quickly, stepping forward. 

Asmodeous shot Valentino and Vox a look, but carefully handed her the tiny pink bundle. 

“We’ll take her,” she declared firmly. “Valentino will honor his contract. Do you have a diaper bag, or formula or anything?”

Instantly, Asmodeous relaxed. From beneath the desk, he pulled out a pink bag and dropped it at Valentino’s feet. 

“I put a sleep spell on her, so she should stay down the entire way home,” he told them. “But she’s going to be hungry when she wakes up. Formula is in the bag, along with diapers and a few extra things.” 

“Great,” Velvette said as she looked at the pink bag with distaste. “We’ll get a more stylish one in time, come on boys.” With those words, Velvette turned and walked confidently out the door. 

“Do you think they have any idea of what they’re doing?” Fizzeroli muttered as he watched the retreating figures. 

Asmodous shrugged. “We’ll check on it in a few days.  Make sure Valentino truly does uphold his end of the contract.”

Back in the limo, Velvette carefully cradled the newborn to her chest.

“There should be a carseat,” she declared. “Vox, get out your phone. Make a list of the things we’re going to need to keep this thing alive.”

Valentino and Vox stared at her.

“What? It’s either keep it alive, or Valentino breaks his contract and Asmodeus…”

“Yeah, no I get that,” Vox interrupted. “But we, I really never took you for the motherly type.”

“Oh fuck you, I’m motherly,” Velvette snapped. “Now get the phone out and start making a list.” 

By the time they arrived back at the penthouse, the spare bedroom had been transformed into a workable nursery.

“It’s basic, but I can do the design later,” Velvette told them as he looked around.

In her arms, the baby began to fuss as she opened her eyes. 

“She’s probably hungry,” Velvette said to them as she turned and walked out to the kitchen. “One of you, hold her while I make a bottle.” 

Both stared at her in confusion. 

“No, I’ll hurt her,” Valentino confessed finally. “She’s so tiny.”

“Yeah, no. How do I hold it? What do I do?” Vox asked.

Velvette rolled her eyes. “You, Vox, look it up. Valentino, it came from you. So you, sit down on the couch. Vox, take notes.”

Valentino obediently sat down on the couch. Carefully, Velvette placed the baby in his arms and Valentino held the child out at arms length. 

“No, no not like that. Closer. She isn’t a disease, you won’t catch anything from her,” Velvette admonished. “And if she gets sick, we’re all getting it anyway, so buckle up buttercup.”

Velvette watched as he slowly inched his arms closer. Annoyance flooded through her. 

“No, you know what? Unbutton your shirt,” she snapped as she snatched the baby back. 

“Fuck you, no,” Valentino retorted. “That has nothing…I’m not…no!”

“Actually, she’s right, it’s called skin to skin,” Vox interrupted as he looked up from his phone, “we should all probably do it. It helps…with their vitals and stuff. Body temperature and heartbeat regulation. Helps them thrive.”

“And I’m pretty sure if this thing dies, Asmodous will consider it a violation of your contract in some way and kill you as well,” Velvette added.

Hesitantly, Valenitno undid his jacket and unbuttoned his black shirt. Carefully, Velvette positioned his hand under the little girl and laid her against his chest. To his surprise, it felt good- natural, almost. Carefully, he leaned back and settled the child comfortably against him.

“Good. Now don’t be alarmed if she cried,” Velvette warned. “She’s got to be hungry.”

As quickly as she could, she hurried off into the kitchen. As quickly as she could, she mixed a bottle and brought it back to Valentino.

“Here, you feed her, Vox,” she directed. 

“Oh hell no, it ain’t my kid,” Vox protested. 

 “We’re in this together, right? Otherwise the empire crumbles,” Velvette said firmly. 

The look on Vox’s face told Velvette she had won. She watched as he took off his jacket, rolled up his sleeves and unbuttoned his shirt. 

“Fine, I’m ready,” he said reluctantly.

 Carefully, Valentino handed the baby to Vox and Velvette adjusted his arms so the baby was in the correct position. She watched as he gently pressed the bottle to her lips and to Velvette’s relief, she instantly took to it. 

“She is kind of cute,” Vox admitted as she suckled frantically. “Are you hungry, little girl? She needs a name, right?” 

“Let’s call her Reader,” Valentino suggested. “It was…well, it doesn’t matter. I’m her dad, I get to name her, right Velvette?”

“Reader,” Velvette said slowly. “Yeah. I like it.” With a swish of her skirt, she turned away. “I’m going to make some design notes for the nursery. Yell for me when she’s done eating, she’ll need to be burped.”

“Great,” Vox muttered as he looked at Valentino. “That ones on you.”

“We’ll all be doing it,” Velvette yelled over her shoulders. “She’s a member of this family, we take care of each other. Period.”

[alotofpockets]

The regular | Part 1 | Alessia Russo

Pairing: Alessia Russo x Reader

Summary: Your cafe gains a new regular after Alessia's move to Arsenal.

Masterlist | Woso masterlist | words: 2.1k

Part 1 | Part 2

Over the past few months you gained a new regular at your cafe. You loved seeing familiar faces and having small conversations with these people that showed your business love over and over again. You had recognized this new customer instantly as you are an avid watcher of women’s soccer, it was none other than Alessia Russo. When she first came into your shop, you greeted her with a smile, “Goodmorning, what can I get for you today?” You greeted her like you greeted every customer, understanding that besides being a famous soccer player, she was also just a person looking for a morning coffee. She ordered and took a seat in one of the corner booths. 

She had come in almost every morning for the next few weeks. You were slightly suspicious of what the Manchester United player was doing here in North London, but again you were not wanting to impose and let her live her life outside of fame. So, when you came across the announcement that Alessia had transferred to Arsenal, the pieces clicked. Though, of course you continued treating her like a regular customer, letting her enjoy her personal space.

You opened up the cafe for the day and got to work on setting out the freshly baked pastries. You had opened the door for some fresh air, while you cleaned off the tables you didn’t get to last night. At the sound of footsteps, you turn around, you were met with the smile of none other than the newest member of Arsenal herself. “Hi, good morning.” You greet her with a smile of your own. “Hi, sorry I know you’re not officially open yet but I was wondering if maybe I could get a coffee to go?” The girl had such an hopeful look in her eyes that you could hardly resist, not that you would have resisted in the first place. “Yeah, no worries, of course you can.” You knew Arsenal was playing Manchester United today at Leigh Sports Village, the home stadium of her old club, and the players' bus likely had to leave within 30 minutes.

She gives you her order and you start working on it. “Thank you so much,” She starts as you hand her the cup. “you’re a lifesaver. Your coffee is the only thing that keeps me going in the morning.” You laugh with her. “Any time, I hope you have a great morning!” As she pays for her drink she tells you to keep the change for getting her a coffee before opening, you try to refuse but she insists. “Thanks again. I hope you have a great day as well.” And with that she’s out the door again. 

That night you watch the match from home, you’re incredibly shocked at how rude the Manchester United fans are towards Alessia, every time she touched the ball the crowd chanted all kinds of boo’s her way. You felt for the girl, this was no way to treat a person. When you heard the Arsenal fans chant ‘Lessi Russo we’ve got - Lessi Russo we’ve got’ you were proud of your team's efforts to make Alessia feel welcome, and hoped that she was able to focus on the positivity instead of the negativity. 

It was a busy Saturday morning at the cafe, still each time you heard the little bell at the door ring, you looked up to see if it was Alessia but it hadn’t been her all morning. You went around the shop seeing if anyone wanted refills on their coffee as your coworker Mandy helped the people in line with their orders. It was only after the lunch rush that Alessia walked through the door. The usual smile plastered on her face was replaced with a tired looking frown, your heart sank. When you notice her slumping down into a seat without ordering, you decide to go ahead and make her regular order for her. You set the cup down in front of her. “On the house.” You tell her when she looks at you in question. 

When a group of middle aged men wearing Manchester United jerseys walked in your eyes quickly shot to Alessia, she had her backs to them so she didn’t realize. You hoped these fans weren’t like the rude ones you saw on TV last night as you took their order. The group walked past Alessia’s table and sat down a couple tables over. They immediately started whispering to each other and pointing Alessia’s way. Alessia noticed the group and looked up, the men started laughing loudly when she made eye contact with them. You saw Alessia look back down at her coffee with a sad expression on her face. “Hey, Mandy, can you take over for a bit?” Mandy agreed instantly and you walked straight to Alessia’s table.

You stand with your back to the men, and send Alessia an apologetic look. “Hi miss, that private table in the back is ready for you. If you follow me, I’ll lead you to it.” Alessia nods, grabs her bag and follows your direction. You hold open the door to the back and lead her to your office. “I am so sorry for them, Alessia. Please take all the time you need here. I can kick the group out if you want.” Alessia shakes her head, “It’s okay, they didn’t do anything yet. Wait, you knew something happened without them doing something and you know my name.” A slight blush reached your cheeks, there was no more hiding the fact that you didn’t know who she was. “I, eh- yes, I didn’t say anything, but yes. I’m y/n, to keep the name part even.” Alessia takes a seat on the couch in your office, “You knew this whole time and didn’t say anything?” You shrug, “Yeah, I’m sorry, I figured you got recognized enough and deserved regular interactions too.” Alessia smiled for the first time since she walked in. “No, no, don’t apologize. It is refreshing, just being able to order my coffee and stuff, it’s one of the reasons I enjoy your shop so much.” 

“You saw the game yesterday then?” Alessia questions, once again looking down. “Yes, I did. Those Manchester United fans were absolutely horrible and I am so sorry that they treated you so badly during the game. I think you played really well, Alessia, you didn’t deserve that, no person does.” After a deep sigh, Alessia says, “Yeah, they were.” You sit with her, “For what it’s worth, I’m very happy that you joined Arsenal.” Alessia’s smile grows again, “You’re a Gooner?” In response you just say, “Lessi Russo we’ve got.” and you both start laughing. Alessia looks around, now that she’s calmed down a bit she realizes where she is, “The owner won’t mind that I am in here?” You decide to joke with her as your first answer. “Yeah, I don’t think she will mind.” She searches your face, “Are you sure?” The corners of your mouth perk up, “Oh, very sure.” You can’t hold your laughter in anymore. “I feel like I am missing something.” Alessia says with a confused look on her face. “Okay, okay, I’m sorry. Alessia, I am the owner, and I do not mind that you're here.” She rolls her eyes and playfully hits your arm. You talk for a bit longer before Alessia says that she has an appointment to get to. “Can I get you a coffee to go real quick?” She nods, “Yeah, I’d love that.”

You head to the front to make her coffee to go and see that the men are still there. “Here you go. They’re still here, we have a back exit if you want to ignore their presence entirely?” Alessia thanks you and follows you to the back exit. “You should come to one of our upcoming games, if you’d like.” You smile at her, “Yeah, that sounds fun.” She points to your apron, “Can I borrow your notepad for a second?” You hand it to her and watch her write something down. “Here’s my number, text me and I’ll get you into whatever game you’d like.” And with that she’s out of the door. You look down to the number with a smile on your face. When you hear Mandy call out for your help you quickly drop the note on your desk and head back to the front. “Thank you for covering, Mandy, I appreciate it.” After work that day you texted Alessia, and made plans to come see them play against Aston Villa.

The next day was slow, one Sunday it was super busy, and the other it was quite the opposite. However, soon after that thought the quiet got interrupted by the bell ringing, within seconds the room filled with chatter, you looked up and saw Alessia welcome in a group of her fellow Arsenal players. She sends you a quick wave and follows her teammates, Katie, Beth, Viv, and Leah to a booth. It was just you today, so you headed their way to take their orders. “Hi ladies, what can I get for you?” Beth is the first to talk. “Hi, Alessia over here has told us all about you, and we wanted to come see for ourselves.” After a warning nudge by Viv, she adds, “Your cafe, of course. She said the coffee was amazing here.” You smile and take their orders. “All right, coming right up.” You say not noticing the warning glances Alessia sent the other girls. 

You make each of their drinks and bring them to the booth. Katie gets your attention before you turn back to the counter. “I heard you were going to come see us play next week.” You smile at the group, “Oh yeah, I am. Alessia is going to get me a ticket. I’m very excited to see you all play live.” You engage in some more small talk with the girl before letting them enjoy their coffee. As soon as you turn your back on the group, the table starts pushing Alessia to go talk to you.

Alessia walks up to the counter, you smile at her when she greets you. “Hey, did I forget something?” You ask in return. “Oh no, I just wanted to see how you were doing today.” You were happy to see that she was back to her smiley self. “I’m doing good, it’s been slow today, so I was happy to see you walk in. How about you, how are you?” Alessia leans on the counter, standing in a more comfortable position. “I’m doing well, we just got back from practice and when the girls said they wanted to get some coffee together, I told them this was the perfect place.” “Well, thank you for the compliment, I really appreciate it.” Alessia turns around and walks back to the table but you see her teammates pushing her back towards you, you smile at the scene in front of you, but quickly hide it when Alessia comes back your way. “Actually, I did have a question.” 

You noticed the woman in front of you getting nervous. “Okay, ask away.” Alessia plays with the rings on her fingers. “I was wondering if you had any plans for tonight.” You smile at her, butterflies start filling your stomach. “That depends on your next question.” You joke. She stops fidgeting with her rings and looks up to read the expression on your face, when she sees you’re smirking she knows that she can continue. “Would you like to get dinner tonight? With just me, not the whole team, though we could do that too if you’d like that more.” She starts rambling. “Yes, I would love to. It’s a date, just you and me.” You discuss some details before Alessia heads back to the table. You hear them cheering her on and smile to yourself. 

Not long after more people enter the shop. You help everyone with their orders with a smile that won’t falter. Alessia joins in the small line of customers. “Hi.” You greet her. “Hey.” She says back, you both smile at each other and hold eye contact for a moment before Alessia continues. “Can I pay for the whole table?” You put in the amount for the table and she pays, again with a tip. “I’ll see you tonight.” She says before joining the rest of the girls, you wave at them when they walk out. The rest of the day flies by as you are looking forward to your date with Alessia. 

Continue reading part 2

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[maxwellatoms]

Good day sir. Hope I'm not bothering you My brother and I are rewatching The grim adventures and it's been fun. Miss cartoons that were just plain random fun. I'm curious about 3 things if I may ask - Jeff the Spider's design changed a few times, his first appearance was more simple, his second appearance was more detailed and gross looking, then after that he went back to a simple design. Was it because the "gross" design was too hard to animate? - I've noticed in some episodes a few characters with glasses would have green eyes, similar to Nergal Junior. Was there a miscommunication with the animation team? - Lastly, is there anything you wish you could've done differently in Billy and Mandy? Like doing certain episodes or characters different? Just retrospective sorta stuff I know this is probably asking a lot, but I just want you to know you're a great source of inspiration and one of the many reasons why I love spooky supernatural content. Keep up the good fight

Hey!

#1:

The reason that most of the characters changed over time was because I updated the models to help the overseas studios (and our own internal artists) get things on-model. I'll go deeper into Billy & Mandy's history with designs in "Billy & Mandy vs. The Entertainment Industry", but I went from wanting to allow artists to have complete freedom to tightening things down as time went on. The smart play would've to develop solid models first and then explain how, when, and why you can break the rules. That's the opposite of what we did.

Jeff was a more complicated character than most, with his double-mandible, multiple eyes, and eight limbs. I suspect that what happened in this case was that the overseas studio either didn't keep or didn't share the original Jeff model with their teams, and instead only used the "special pose" model of Jeff looking gross. Like a lot of the model stuff, it was a quality control issue. Back then when everything was analog (we still had to deliver on film up through the turn of the century) it was pretty hard to change anything once it had been done. So I'd always say, "next time" and then do a clarity pass over the designs.

#2.

Same deal. In the first few seasons, we had analog color correction, where you'd go to a big suite and some guy would run picture and you'd call out anything big that was bugging you. Chances are that we either didn't notice the error, or did and just couldn't do anything about it.

All of those early Mandy smiles were put in overseas, and I wasn't allowed to fix them. It bugged me so much that I vowed to find a way to fix stuff like that myself. I eventually figured out that I could export individual frames to Photoshop, tweak them, and then give them back to the editor. That way I could actually reanimate things that really bugged me but we didn't have the budget to fix.

#3.

Nah. It's fine.

Thanks and good luck!

[callivich]

@dazzle02 was looking for fics from Ian’s POV. This got me rereading some Ian POV fics I love and then I went down a rabbit hole. I thought I might as well do a rec list. So here’s some of my favourites and some newly discovered gems- it’s a mix of AU and canon divergent/compliant. Enjoy! 💖 If I get some time, I’ll do a Mickey POV list too!

I hit the link limit with this first post so there’s a reblog with more, don’t miss that. I’d love to know everyone’s favourite Ian POV fics so feel free to reblog with your own recs!

Map of the World by westernredcedar

Ian Gallagher knows a lot of geography.

Intro to Quantum Dating by @spoonfulstar

another college au

Everything About You by @gallavichy

Retelling of Like Real People Do from the perspective of Ian. In hopes of saving for his future, Ian Gallagher works nights on kestrel, an iOS app specializing in paid sex services. The rules there are pretty simple: appeal to your clientbase, build fantasies, and maintain appropriate boundaries. This is the story of how Ian breaks every damn rule and falls in love with Mickey Milkovich.

Darkness comes before the Dawn by @creepkinginc @ian-galagher @transmurderbug

Frank's done it again and this time, his actions have consequences in the form of a curse. How to break it is a mystery, as is the quiet, raven haired stranger that shares the woods with Ian. If they want to survive, they have to learn how to make darkness and silence go hand in hand.

hysteria by serenfire

Ian throws the first punch.

oh, deceiver, is it worth it? by segs

ian thinks he'll want to remember this forever, even though he won't.

What Goes Up by ArtsyAfrodite

He’d sling Appletinis tonight for the big tips, and dance on the diamonds he saw in the floor. He glued a smile over the sadness that long settled in the freckles you could barely see now. But he was happy, he was.

Just Enough Time by osointricate

Ian thought he knew what was coming, but he had no idea. This is Ian's point of view on his bipolar disorder.

this is the essence of love and failure by misandrywitch

“You’re sick,” Mickey says. “Hospital,” Mickey says. And your body is numb and your heart is breaking and you run.

put my faith in this hole in the ground by @gardenerian

He stands at the plot for a while before he begins working. This is it. After weeks of internet searches and sketches in his notepad, it’s time to put it all into action. Ian closes his eyes against the afternoon sun, breathes in the smell of dirt and greenery. Thinks about that giver of dreams. Opens them, squeezes the trowel in his hand. He works. He works well. And then: there it is. A goal accomplished. A beginning.

a mountain at my gates by @gardenerian

Ian loves serving cold gin and champagne to the laughing flappers that visit his family's speakeasy. Even as the Gallaghers struggle to build an empire, he thinks the only thing missing is a lover to dance with. Desperate to get out from under his father's thumb, Mickey sets out to undermine the already thriving Milkovich empire. Tasked with taking the Gallagher operation out, Mickey knows to expect violence and danger. But he never could have expected Ian.

to the thawing wind by @gardenerian

Living and working in the icy chill of an endless winter, Ian and his family are assigned to work the farms to bolster food supply. They live quietly enough, following the rules, until Mickey and Mandy Milkovich (with all their secrets) are moved in across the road.

pulling a fiona by littlemoretouchme

"Pulling a Monica. What a fucking joke. His whole life, he’s been pulling a Fiona." [Small moments between Ian and Fiona over the years, based off Cameron Monaghan saying "Fiona and Ian, who were, in many ways, the most stable components of the family… they were the ones who were consistently employed and taking care of people… are now the least stable."]

The Shirt by AlyCalypso

Ian wears Mickey's shirt by accident the first time. But then he wears it again, and again.

Not Your Mother's Love Story by orphan_account

Alternate S7 ending. The phone dinged. Missed call. Ian waited to see if there was a voicemail. He didn't know if he was going to listen to it, if Mickey left a voicemail. Part of him thought he kind of owed it to Mickey. Part of him was sure that if he heard Mickey's voice one more time, if he remembered the way he sounded when he said Ian's name, he was going to fall right back into everything he was trying to escape. There weren't any more dings. No voicemail. Nothing. It should have made Ian feel better.

Selfless Acts of the Illegal Variety by @abundanceofnots

The last thing Ian Gallagher thought he'd be at 19 is married—and to a grumpy Ukrainian bouncer called Mickey who's barely said ten words to him since they first met, no less. But when a rare chance at love knocks on your door, you don't just send the cute guy in dire need of a green card back to his homophobic father in Kyiv, right?

Undead Agents of Chaos by @abundanceofnots

Ian is fourteen when he discovers a comic book series called Undead Agents of Chaos. It’s going to take years before he’ll know what it’s like to lose a heart. First, he has to find out how it feels to have it beat out hard against his ribcage as he stands on the corner of a street, having just produced the most embarrassing sound of his life. It all starts with an unlikely friend.

Part 1 & 5 of Scenes from a Marriage by @abundanceofnots

Hilarity, love and banter ensue as Ian and Mickey navigate their life together as husbands.

young and stupid (left wide open) by @sam-loves-seb

“The fuck is wrong with you?” Mickey barks with no bite. “Can you hear me?” Ian looks up and blinks slowly at Mickey. “Sorry—what?” “Jesus,” Mickey mutters, looking over Ian with a furrowed brow. “I said are you alright?” And, like, half of him wants to say yeah, I’m fine, just forget this ever happened and get your pants off, but the other half of him wants to say no, I’m a mess, can you just come and sit next to me for a while. He doesn’t end up saying either of those things; he doesn’t even come close. // 1x09: what happens after “I need to see you” and “I’ll meet you there in twenty.”

walk away, walk away by @sam-loves-seb

Mickey half-shrugs incredulously at him with glassy eyes, his mouth hanging slightly open. Ian just blinks back at him, thoroughly lost. Mickey’s jaw twitches. “Is this the end?” Ian shakes his head. “The end of what?” “Of us.” // post-canon: ian and mickey have their first big fight as a married couple.

if i could never give you peace by @sam-loves-seb

“You need to get over him,” Lip tells him. “I know,” Ian sighs. “It’s been two months.” “It’s been two years.” And that, more than anything, just makes the rumbling in Ian’s chest pound on his ribs even harder. Because, yeah—it’s been two years since they broke up, but somehow their parting at the border felt more like an ending than their breakup ever did. // post-7x11: ian feels unsettled ever since he left mickey at the mexico border.

hold tight to your umbrella by @sam-loves-seb

Because he is fine. Really, it’s nothing. It’s not that bad. He’s just tired, fatigued from the day and the racing thoughts in his head. It’s nothing he hasn’t felt on a normal day before. It’s nothing for Mickey to worry about. “You sure?” Mickey asks, wrapping his arms around Ian’s waist, hands trapped between Ian’s back and the couch. “Yeah,” Ian tells him, nodding a bit. “I think so.” He’s being honest when he says it, but that doesn’t necessarily make it true. // post-canon: ian isn’t feeling quite like himself these days.

i'd like to be my old self again (but i'm still trying to find it) by @sam-loves-seb

Mickey runs his hand over his mouth, staring at the closet and the arrangement of shirts and jackets that looks no more and no less organized than before. “You feelin’ okay?” Something prickles at the back of Ian’s neck. “I feel fine,” he answers, shaking it off. “Why?”“You don’t feel… off?” Ian scoffs. “Because I did the laundry and cleaned the apartment a little bit?” “No… yes?” Mickey winces.“Mickey. What the hell are you even saying?” // post-canon: ian is feeling better, until he’s not.

The Buzz Under His Skin by @palepinkgoat

Set in early S4. See end for mental illness warning/notes. This is definitely not what Ian meant to have happen. He had no idea what this would really be like, when he imagined it. But he never even really imagined it. It was like he snapped his fingers,and he's just here, and this guy is here, and now this is here. Happening. (or: Ian's manic thoughts tend to circle back to one blue-eyed boy.)

Before the Dawn by missmichellebelle

Mickey holds him tighter, and Ian wonders how he can feel like he’s breaking apart into a thousand pieces while being held together.

Rage Against the Dying of the Light by missmichellebelle

Ian still remembers his first visit to therapy, where he expected the chaise lounge for him to lay on and the constant sound of someone scribbling notes. What he’d gotten instead was a regular love seat, and when he’d tried to lay down on it, his therapist had given a startled little laugh and told him that it was, “Quite unnecessary, really.” She never took notes. She never even held a clipboard. She just clasped her hands in her lap and gave Ian her full attention.

superman (dumb fucking magnets) by ArtsyAfrodite

Yeah, Ian wants to be just like him. At least he’ll stick to something, point his arms towards anything.

gotta wait for you, honey by @biblionerd07

Ian's been counting down to his 30th birthday.

every time I think I've lost my way by @biblionerd07

Ian wakes up alone on a road in the woods, and he has to decide if he's going to stay or go.

fix me up by @biblionerd07

Mickey has a lot of scars. Ian has a lot of feelings about those scars.

when you get there you'll know by @biblionerd07

Ian gets out of prison 352 days before Mickey does. They do their best to make it through.

something so wretched about this by @onthepyre

five times ian thought about kissing mickey and one time he actually did

Wishbone by @fangirl-on-fire3

There’s something building, bubbles rolling across frothing water, heat and sound and thick steam curling like an impenetrable wall of humidity over the city. Each time Mickey comes into the store, gives him that predatory look, the rope of tension between them tightens, laden with the tantalizing possibility of more. For someone so stubborn, Mickey's about as flighty as a deer. The slightest threat of a kiss, even Ian looking at his lips for a second too long, always has him bolting.

take your shoes off in the back of my van by @fangirl-on-fire3

After, with the bleachers trickling a slow shower of dust above them, layers of sweat still clinging to their skin, Mickey says, “I missed you.”A storm of starlings break free in Ian’s chest, lurching his heart sideways. It’s beating so fast it might crash straight through his ribs in a violent, bloody mess. “You did?” “Yeah, man. Had to do all the fucking in prison.” Ian wilts.

Something So Pleasant About That Place by @haunted-phantom-student

Five time Ian thinks Mickey is there, and one time he actually is.

Always Darkest Before the Dawn by @haunted-phantom-student

Every time Ian feels himself going low, there’s a moment, a very distinct moment, a moment that confirms that no, he isn’t just tired after a long few days.

I Didn't Know It at Fifteen by @haunted-phantom-student

For a long time, Ian would have said that the thing with Kash started on the tenth of May. He always remembered the exact date because it was the day after his fifteenth birthday, the day he’d come into work with a new mix CD, courtesy of Lip, and a busted nose, courtesy of his father.

Love That's Laid Beside Me by @we-couch

ian's pov of the morning/day after

Glow by @we-couch

Character study of Ian over the years. (s1-7)

Apartment 4A by @we-couch

When the chaos of the Gallagher home gets to be too much, Ian decides to move out. He answers a roommate ad, and gets more than he bargained for.

keeper of the prize by @squidyyy23

Ian and Mickey, growing and learning as they become domino champions, hustle their way through their prison sentences.

Ristretto by @howlinchickhowl

Ian works the late shift at the Tamp and Grind. It's not what he always planned to be doing at 22, but it's a steady paycheck and he doesn't hate it. When he gains a new colleague with a wicked sense of humor and a sinfully hot boyfriend, he starts to think maybe he should be trying to do more with his life than perfecting his latte art.

Love, like a river by @howlinchickhowl

And it’s as Ian’s turning properly to look at him so that Mickey can fully appreciate the eye-roll that Ian feels is the necessary response to his husband being his own special brand of idiot that Mickey’s eyes start to bug in panic and his free hand slaps quickly over his mouth. He’s gonna boot again. Mickey doesn't drink enough water on hot days and Ian thinks that's dumb, but he loves him anyway.

elevator music by @iansfreckles

He’s late, he’s covered in coffee, and he’s trapped in an elevator with the biggest asshole he’s ever met in his life. (Fifteen minutes ago, Ian Gallagher slept through his alarm — and things have only gotten worse since then. OR: Ian moves out on his own, makes an impression on his new neighbor, and learns a thing or two about forgiveness.

details in the fabric by @iansfreckles

Pulling that EMT jacket on for the first time feels a little bit like donning a super suit. Like gearing up to take on the world. (OR Ian's life, as told through clothes)

we'll be a fine line (we'll be alright) by @iansfreckles

“Tried to get a job today. Didn’t work out.” Ian, feeling stiff as a board as he settled beside Mickey on their bed, let out a tight breath. “I know,” he replied after a moment, trying to be patient. He shifted to lay on his back, pointedly not looking to the man beside him, instead staring up at the dark ceiling. “I was there, remember? With the other minimum-wage earning, rotten-pig-smelling bozos.” Alright, so maybe he was hitting petty a little more than patient, tonight. Sue him. (Or an alternate ending to 11x02, where Ian and Mickey actually resolve some tensions)

a sort of fairytale by redkay

By the time Ian is tossed out of the army and makes his reluctant way home, Mickey is long gone.

Sweetpea by @whatthebodygraspsnot

Sweetpea, the stray that eats his neighbors flowers, is a little asshole of a cat. But Ian still hopes to win her over with treats from his lunch and rambling conversation as he tends to his failing garden. Just as he thinks he's starting to get her to like him, everything flips on its head. You see, Sweetpea is not a normal cat. And Sweetpea is not a she.

Customer Satisfaction by @whatthebodygraspsnot

For someone who works at a sex shop, Ian’s love life is tragically dead. That is, until a hot, flirty, tatted up customer decides to enroll in their product review program for the cash. Ian gathers the toys and takes him to the back room for their first session. He’s always kept things very professional at this job - no problems discussing sex-related things at all. But how the hell is he supposed to keep his cool behind the camera and ask corporate’s review questions when he’s got the hottest guy on the planet playing with himself just a few feet away?

How To Bag A Baddie by @whatthebodygraspsnot

Getting a text from a stranger threatening to bash his kneecaps in isn’t something Ian planned for tonight. But he’s intrigued. Call it morbid curiosity, fed by both ends as their conversation continues well past “you’ve got the wrong number”. The more he uncovers about this mystery guy, the more he likes, and the more he wants. Especially when he learns he's not the only one gunning for him. Ian is about to have a very interesting night.

@hornygaythug by @whatthebodygraspsnot

Ian's roommate is pretty. Ian's roommate is kind of an asshole. Ian's roommate posts pictures of himself online and Ian swears to god he's got it under control.

ligature by @catgrassplantdad

It was only a matter of time before they finally hit this moment, before they finally felt like they had enough experience to try this.

sink in by @catgrassplantdad

The pursuits of a married couple just trying to take a damn bath. Why is this so hard to accomplish?

Icarus Is Online by @mishervellous

AnonMate is all everyone is talking about. Ian wants in on it.

I Am the Walls of My Home by @mishervellous

Ian’s journey towards healing and self-acceptance.

Five Times Mickey Wears Ian's Clothes and One Time Ian Wears Mickey's by @teatimeallovertown

A brief look at the journey of Mickey and Ian through the clothes they share

Pink + White by @flamingbluepanda

Ian and Mickey reunite, separate, and reunite again.  (Or, The Early Season 10 Prison Arc we Deserved(TM) )

how to love by proval

Mickey's body's been a bit quieter for a while now, no longer wracked through with those heaving sobs. But Ian gets the feeling if he leaves they'll start up again. Ian POV gap filler for 11x09. Starts after the end of 11x08.

Stages by @dreamylyfe-x

It’s nice for married couples to share interests and experiences. But they didn’t really need their dads to die one after the other like this.

Risk by @dreamylyfe-x

Ian and Mickey figuring out marriage, and each other, in the middle of a global crisis. Canon compliant to the end of season 10.

'Til the Day My Life is Through by @ianrightsonly

Ian is devastated by the thought of Mickey not remembering their first wedding anniversary. He should know better than to ever doubt his husband.

Baby, That's What Makes Us... by @ianrightsonly Ian says no more sex until Mickey gets a job. Mickey says no more sex until Ian gets over himself. Easier said than done, when you’re married and sharing the same bed.

Every Time We Say Goodbye by @ianrightsonly

Ian remembers every kiss he’s ever shared with Mickey. The quick pecks on the cheek; the frantic, biting and bruising makeouts; the slow, languid movements of their mouths against one another. He remembers them all, and he thinks of them often. This kiss though, it’s one of his favorites.

Claim by @gallavictorious

Mickey wants back into Ian's life. Ian wonders if, and how, to let him. Or, the one where the boys conduct their meaningful conversations not by talking but by having sex.

Foreign Country by @gallavictorious

Never returning had not been a conscious choice. Neither was going back. Ian, Kash and Grab, and the memories of good times and bad - and most of all of Mickey.

All You Wanna Do series by @usercelestial

explorations of ians sexual trauma

I Got This by @usercelestial

ian learns to accept help or three times ian deals with it on his own and one time he doesn't have to

The waves come forward, we are traveling together by sadwhales

Ian remembers the first time Mickey ever smiled at him. or, On the night of their wedding, Ian and Mickey talk a little bit about the past, and surprisingly, their feelings.

life of the party by framboise

In which Ian and Mickey are domestic bitches, and deal with some of Ian's memories of those lost months working in the clubs.

These Undomesticated Wilds by @arrowflier

When Ian Gallagher left Chicago behind him to traipse aimlessly through the wilderness, he was hoping to find himself--the self that he had lost when his bipolar diagnosis had his family treating him with kid gloves and his boyfriend annoyed with his melancholic acceptance of his new life. He wasn't looking for a rescue. But when he's injured on a hike through the woods in southern Indiana, a rescue is what he gets. And if he's lucky, he might find a little more than he was looking for.

Bold Will Hold by @smokey-mickey

Ian tries to play it cool as he’s greeted with bright blue eyes standing out against pale skin. Ian can see the edges of tattoos poking out of his jacket at his neck and wrists, and a simple silver nose ring in his right nostril. Awkward yet adorable Tattoo AU.

body and mind by @unbridgeabledistances

He immediately pushes the thought down. He doesn’t fucking need that anymore to keep his head above water; he’s stable, he’s loved, he’s fed. He’s growing organic tomatoes, and definitely developing a farmer’s tan from his days hunched over their way-too-tiny community garden plot, tenderly watering and pruning the vines and brambles. He's desired. So it doesn’t make fucking sense that the hunger, the clawing in his stomach for an absence, doesn’t really stop. or, ian’s body image through the years (based on the tumblr prompt: ian struggling with eating once they move to the west side)

kings of the southside by @unbridgeabledistances

The storefronts on the block were different now— fragile minimalist displays and organic coffee shops uprooting the aged wooden bar signs with peeling paint and bullet holes— but against all odds, and with everyone else moving on, he and Mickey had decided to stay. (or, a canon divergent fic in which ian and mickey stay on the southside and take over the alibi)

we’re the center of our universe by @unbridgeabledistances

It wasn’t like Ian wanted to bring up the conversation again, about monogamy and boundaries and fuck-knows-what-else; but these past few weeks had been hard, like something cavernous was cracking and splintering between them. Their banter had slowly turned less and less humorous, and more pointed and jagged, about who was the breadwinner and who was the “man”; and even though they’d patched it up and built small bridges between them, and had hung off of each other’s bodies at Lip’s apartment the night Ian had brought up the monogamy conversation for the first time, Ian couldn’t help but feel the weight of the things unsaid wriggling and rustling inside him, like a germinating seed about to bloom. or, a communicative little one-shot of ian and mickey discussing their boundaries and processing traumas

The Second-Time Commitment by ListenListen223

Ian levels out after a manic episode, 74 hours into an involuntary hospitalization. Mickey won't bust him out, and insists that he got him to the best hospital in Chicago, so Ian better get better. Surrounded by people who think that the stuff they've been through is maybe a little bit serious, Ian and Mickey have to decide what's worth talking about, and what to leave on the South side. At least for the next 70 hours.

Because…You’re My Husband by @wildxwired

“Monica would have loved today.”

Last of a Dying Breed by @wildxwired

After the death of his sociopathic PO, Ian’s sent to work at XK9, the dog rescue that gives second chances to the unwanted pets and ex-cons of the southside — and it just so happens to be run by the most unlikely success story of them all.

There Are Places You Belong by @livinginsunnyhell

He knew he had his siblings, but sometimes they were so caught up in their own stuff, they couldn’t be there in the way he needed. Mickey was. Mickey always had been. He was his home after all. Ian and Mickey adjust to the West Side and grow closer in their second year of marriage.

your voice is the sound of sirens (to a house on fire) by hypernomad

Ian learns how to read; he never really learns how to stop. When he’s six, he reads Alice in Wonderland and wonders, vaguely, if Lewis Carroll was actually predicting the life of a certain freckled redhead in Chicago with an alcoholic father and an erratic mother. It certainly seems that way at times. His life is a psychedelic mess of being left at the roadside with his brother and sisters, being “given” to random women in the street by his stoned mother, and blinking ash out of his eyes after his father drunkenly throws an ashtray at him for looking like his uncle. The thought is fleeting and he shakes it away as quickly as it comes.

saut dans le vide, my lover by armsoftheocean

When Ian sees Mickey’s smiling response, he can’t help but smile wider with his eyes lighting up and he knows he looks fucking ridiculous; beaming as if Mickey had handed him the key to the universe, but his heart is thrumming with happiness and fuck, he’s so far gone that he doesn’t even give a shit. 

[ipso-faculty]

Today's rabbithole: the origins of "dyadic" as opposite of intersex/h-word

TLDR: "dyadic" seems to come from 1970s radical feminism and seems to have entered intersex vocabulary via gender studies. This implies it is NOT a term coined from within the intersex community.

I've been reading Cripping Intersex since it's this month's pick for @intersexbookclub (and it's not too late for you to pick it up yourself! 💜). One thing that caught my attention is Orr spends a bunch of time presenting the origins of "endosex" and "perisex" as disputed for whether these terms were coined by intersex people or not.

Orr does this because they clearly prefer "dyadic" and are trying to justify why they're talking about "compulsory dyadism" rather than "compulsory endonormativity/perinormativity" etc. 🤨

Interestingly enough, Orr makes absolutely zero attempt in the book to find an origin for the word "dyadic". 🧐 Orr also never questions whether the term "dyadic" actually came from the intersex community. 🧐 So..... rabbit hole time!

Before I get into what I found on dyadic, I wanna quickly fact check Orr on the origin of endosex. Best as I can tell, the term was first used in German in 2000 by Heike Bödeker. Bödeker is controversial for supporting autogynephilia 😬, but I've never seen anybody doubt Bödeker having mixed gonadal dysgenesis. If anybody knows of an older use of endosex, please send it my way! But as far as I can tell, "endosex" was coined by an intersex person.

Okay, onto the origin of dyadic. Orr presents this word as though its only detractors come from its implication there is a sex binary, even though as @intersex-ionality discusses here there are other reasons people don't like it. One reason is that the term is considered to originate from outside the intersex community.

Orr never questions the origins of dyadic. But intersex-ionality's post got me wondering if I could track down an textual origin.

So I went to Google Scholar, searched for "dyad" or "dyadic" plus "intersex" or the h-word and kept changing the time period increasingly far back in time. (Initially I just used intersex until I remembered the h-word slur would be more common in older articles 😬.)

I went into this thinking maybe dyadic would be related to how in early intersex studies literature like Critical Intersex (2009) you can see authors trying out terms like "dimorphic" and "dimorphous" that reference sexual dimorphism. (Neither "dyadic" nor "endosex" show up in the book.)

But the earliest works by intersex scholars that invoke dyadic tend to use it in a way that implies to me it has its own origin - e.g. Malatino (2010) talks about "at one pole, the dyad of the dimorphic heterosexual couple and, at the other, the hermaphroditic body" and "the heteronormative promised land of proper dyadic, dimorphic sex" which gives me the impression dyadic has a more sociological origin rather than the biology origin of dimorphic.

This 2010 gender studies article by Mandy Merck that talks about the intersex rights movement was my first solid lead. Merck draws a direct connection between the intersex rights movement and the 1970 book The Dialectic of Sex by Shulamith Firestone. 😯

In the book, Firestone explicitly talks about the "male-female dyad". This book had a fairly big impact when it came out. Firestone was a big-name second-wave radical feminist. And as Merck puts it: "[Firestone's] aim is to release women and men from the culturally gendered[5] dyad of the “subjective, intuitive, introverted, wishful, dreamy or fantastic” and the “objective, logical, extroverted, realistic”[6] into a society undivided by genital differences. This she calls “integration.”" (emphasis mine)

Pushing the search terms to before the 00s, I found I there were some 1980s botanists kinda using "dyad" as an opposite to "hermaphrodite" (example). I don't know how standard this was though, and with Google Scholar it is important to remember that digitization becomes less common the further back you go. 🤷‍♀️

Judith Butler used "dyadic" in a 1985 article about Foucault's Herculine Barbin.

The Butler article got me searching for more generally - "dyad" or "dyadic" plus "sex-roles male female". I found lots of results using dyadic to talk about female/male sex roles from the 1970s.... and a rather sudden paucity of such articles in the 1960s. 🤔

When I restricted the search to anything before 1970, I get results from symbolic interactionist sociology. I.e. the sociology use of "dyadic" (i.e. any social interaction happening between a pair of individuals).

So looks like dyadic as a sex role thing entered the academic lexicon in the early 70s. Which lines up pretty damn well with The Dialectic of Sex coming out in 1970. 👍️ And indeed, many of the 70s uses of "dyadic" explicitly cite Firestone.

I'm guessing Firestone was probably influenced by the interactionist term. Lots of sociologists were talking about dyadic relationships and/or interactions such as teacher-student, parent-child, husband-wife, etc. In this context, it's not surprising that Firestone would pick dyad as a term to talk about male-female sex roles and interactions.

Other than the 1980s botany articles I didn't actually find much from the pre-2000 biology world, and no leads from the medical literature. This doesn't mean "dyadic" wasn't being used by physicans, just that it isn't showing up in my searches on Google Scholar.

I'm coming out of this with the impression that Merck's got it right to be connecting the intersex-related use of dyadic as originating from the writing of Shulamith Firestone. If anybody knows of competing evidence for an origin, *please* do send it my way as I'd be super interested. But in the absence of other evidence, I'd tentatively say that the term dyadic came out of second wave radical feminism and *not* the intersex community.

[cup1dluvhss]

˖ . ݁𝜗𝜚. ݁₊ DO I WANNA KNOW?, written by cup1dluvhs

˖ . ݁𝜗𝜚. ݁₊for some reason hamzah never really liked you, despite your bubbly personality, pretty face, and energy which drew people in. one night at a party, you confront him about it and it leads to a heated argument which leaves you in tears.

| warnings: angst, mentions of alcohol, bad language

| taking requests!

for some reason, hamzah had always hated you.

you never knew why, or what you did, but it irked you to the point where it kept you up at night.

you had met hamzah through mandy, your best friend, a couple years ago at a party, mandy having introduced him as her boyfriend’s boyfriend. it made you laugh, however, when you went to smile at hamzah he looked away and scoffed. and since then, it hasn’t changed.

you had never insulted him, given him any looks, or even had a proper conversation with him, which is why you were so so confused about his dislike for you. you were good at making friends, and had a tendency to make people laugh effortlessly, yet nothing you did or say would ever make him react in the way people usually would.

because of this you began to hyper fixate over him, and eventually, you developed a thing for him. it was completely unplanned, and you yourself were even confused considering he had no desire to even look at you. it wasn’t like usual crushes, where you would try to talk to or get the attention of the person, you just minded your own business and kept to yourself because you knew it would only make things worse.

you were currently getting ready for a party at mandy and martins, checking yourself in the mirror and making sure you looked perfect. even though hamzah never looked at you no matter how hard you worked on yourself, you still hoped one day he would.

you were wearing a black dress with little sparkles which hit about mid-thigh, and it flattered you well and showed off your curves. you smiled at your reflection, before grabbing your purse and heading for the door. you lived almost right next to martin and mandy, as when you were in the process of moving to toronto mandy helped you look for places and conveniently found you an apartment about five doors down from them.

it was extremely handy for when you were lonely or just wanted someone to talk to, and you even had a key to their apartment so you could show up whenever.

you knocked on the door, smiling as martin answered and opened the door enough for you so you could squeeze past him.

‘what’s up, y/n?’ he said in a friendly tone, a smile on his face as you turned to face him.

‘good! i’m so fucking excited, you have no idea.’ you said, turning back around and finding yourself making eye-contact with the one person you had not mentally prepared yourself to see.

you knew hamzah was martins best friend, and that he had every right to show up to his house before the party, but you didn’t really want to see him. yes, you had feelings for him, but now that it was just you, martin and him, he had easier access to scoff at everything you said and give you looks. it really did hurt your feelings, but you’d never tell him that.

‘hey, hamzah.’ you said quietly, swallowing a lump that began to form in your throat. he hummed in response, before returning his focus back to his phone again.

when you turned back around, martin had a look of frustration on his face. he and mandy also didn’t like the way hamzah treated you, but whenever they tried to confront him about it he would brush them off and claim it ‘wasn’t that deep.’

you gave him a look as if to say, ‘it’s fine.’ and walked into mandy’s room where she was still perched in a chair getting ready.

you sat with her, sighing and she began to talk about her day and tell you how excited she was for the party. you had zoned out mid conversation, your mind now occupied by thoughts of hamzah yet again. you hated how you liked him despite how he treated you, but it was something you yourself could never understand no matter how hard you tried.

two hours had passed, and it was safe to say you were completely and utterly wasted. you were about seven shots in, and martin and mandy’s apartment was full to the brim with people dancing and loud music bouncing off the walls.

you had lost mandy about half way through the night, and were now grinding against some random boy you didn’t even know the name of. you didn’t care however, because you were happy enough to distract yourself from thoughts of hamzah with anyone you could find.

you hadn’t seen him all night, and assumed he was in one of the guest rooms. you knew he wasn’t much of a party person, and often kept to himself alone or out of sight. you secretly hoped he would see you with the guy you were dancing with, but you knew it would probably have zero affect on him whatsoever.

‘wanna find a room?’ the guy you were dancing with whispered in your ear, and you found yourself nodding hesitantly. like you said before, you didn’t really care. plus, it had been a while since you’d gotten laid anyway.

you took his hand and dragged him off the dancing area to one of the two guest bedrooms, completely forgetting what had popped into your mind earlier regarding those bedrooms. on the way there, after you had turned the corner, the guy suddenly turned you around and began kissing you as you slowly made your way to the room.

your hand clumsily reached for the knob and turned it, your lips still connected with his as you stumbled into the room, his hands on your waist guiding you.

he pushed you against one of the walls, lifting your leg up as his hand travelled over your thigh and slowly up your dress. a noise left your mouth, followed by a gasp when you heard a grunt coming from further inside the room.

your head turned in the direction of the sound, and your mouth fell open when your eyes met with hamzah’s. he had an unimpressed look on his face, before turning to look at the guy who was currently holding one of your legs up with furrowed brows.

‘seriously?’ hamzah said, his eyes meeting yours before darting back to the boy again.

‘hey, head outside and i’ll meet you out there, okay?’ you said to him, watching as he slowly left the room hesitantly, leaving you with hamzah.

you swallowed, moving your back off the wall and walking toward hamzah who was sitting on the bed with his back against the headboard. you hesitantly sat on the side of the bed, your heart beginning to beat faster.

‘sorry, i wouldn’t have come in here if i knew you were here.’ you said, clearing your throat and running a hand through your hair.

‘yeah, obviously.’ he said, widening his eyes sarcastically before his attention returned to his phone.

and that’s when the thought overtook you, and the words slipped from your mouth before you could properly think about them. maybe it was because you were so pent up about things between the two of you, but your mind and body had just decided enough was enough.

‘why do you hate me so much?’

you watched as hamzah’s head darted in your direction, his expression slightly taken aback as if he had no idea what you were talking about. he clearly did although, because he didn’t say a word and simply kept staring at you. so, the words kept spilling from your mouth.

‘—i mean, im nice to you, i smile at you, i’ve tried so hard to make you like me, but you just wont for some reason, and it pisses me off.’ you said almost pleadingly, as if begging him for an answer. maybe you were though, because the two years of not knowing why was slowly driving you insane.

‘not everyone has to like you, y/n.’ he snapped, rolling his eyes as he dropped his phone on the bed, sitting up slightly.

his words caused a lump to rise in your throat, but you promised yourself you wouldn’t look desperate in front of him.

‘yeah, but why, hamzah? i just don’t get it.’ you said, your tone slightly whiny as he shook his head, pinching the bridge of his nose.

‘because y/n, i hate the way your always so fucking cheerful, i hate the way your so desperate to make everyone like you, how you constantly act like people owe you validation when they don’t. your just—so fucking annoying.’ he snapped, his words coming out quickly as if he had rehearsed them in his head.

tears pricked at your eyes, and when one fell, others followed. you were tired of pretending like it didn’t hurt you, the way he acted, and to cry in front of him over those actions felt somewhat refreshing. when he noticed your tears, his face softened slightly before returning to a look of distaste.

‘great. now your fucking crying.’ he said, shaking his head, his voice quiet.

‘what else do you expect me to fucking do! do you know how much it hurts to hear you say all of that when i’ve worked my ass of to at least try and get you to talk to me?’ you hissed, standing up and turning around, running a hand through your hair out of frustration.

you didn’t care anymore. you just wanted to know how much you hated how he made you feel.

‘y/n, you say this stuff expecting me to get on my fucking knees and apologise and be best fucking friends with you, but i don’t know what say. i don’t have to fucking talk to you, or look at you, or even pay attention to you. and i’m sorry if your used to that from other people, but i’m not fucking one of them.’ he said, and with that, you turned for the door. you didn’t want to talk to him anymore.

‘i can’t believe i had a fucking crush on you. your awful, hamzah. fucking awful.’ you said, walking away from him and opening the door, slamming it behind you before he could respond to what you had said. you didn’t want him to. let him know how you felt, and what he lost because of his own actions. he had his chance to apologise, to explain his hostile behaviour, but he didn’t, and you would never give him that chance again.

you left the party after that, and returned home to your apartment. you couldn’t even cry, or look at your phone, and settled for sitting on your couch with your cat, second guessing every last thing you’ve ever said to him.

that was when you realised that you didn’t have to care anymore, because you knew he was a waste of time, and you certainly didn’t have to put effort into trying desperately to him like you anymore. what had happened was a way for you to move on from him, and that was exactly what you were going to do.

[ac-19]

Friends or? D. Franklin (Bravo 6)

Summary: friends or more?

"Hey, I know you hate these. Say the word, and we'll find another way."

I shook my head as I looked back in the mirror at Jason who was leaning on the door frame of the bathroom I was getting ready in for the op.

"I'm good."

Jason nodded.

"You sure about going with Drew? I could send Ray with you instead."

I chuckled and put my head before I turned around to face Jason.

"No offense Jase, but I'm twenty-seven years old and I'd like to believe I look my age so I doubt anybody would ever believe Ray and I were dating. That's the reason I always went out with Clay because we were the most believable as a couple other than you and Mandy."

Jason nodded.

"Yeah, you're probably right."

I nodded.

"I can handle Drew."

Jason nodded.

"We roll out in fifteen."

I nodded as Jason pushed himself up right and walked back downstairs where the rest of the team was. I turned around and quickly finished curling my hair and applied some lipstick before I headed downstairs with the rest of the team.

"I guess you're my girlfriend now."

I shook my head as I stood beside Drew as Lisa briefed us on the mission. Next thing I knew Drew and I were walking over to the club where we were going to spend the next few hours probably hunting our target and dancing too if I had anything to do with it.

"Can we drink on these ops?"

I chuckled as I looked over at Drew.

"If you're footing the bill, yeah. As long as you don't get wasted."

Drew nodded and put his hand on the bottom of my back as we walked inside the club and through the crowd. We made our way to the bar and Drew ordered us two beers.

"I heard you used to do these missions with the other Bravo 6."

I nodded as I leaned my forearms onto the bar in front of me.

"He's got a name. Clay Spenser."

Drew nodded.

"But yeah I used to."

"You two ever?"

I started laughing.

"No. He was married to one of my best friends."

"That don't mean shit these days."

"Maybe not to you, and anyways when you're on the same team relationship's are always messy. Is all the sneaking around really worth it?"

Drew shrugged as he angled his body forward and leaned onto his left arm which was on the bar.

"Depends on the person."

I shrugged.

"I guess, but for real Clay and I we were..."

"If you say Battle Boos I'm walking out that fucking door right now."

I shook my head as I grabbed onto the beer bottle the bartender had just put down in front of us and then without a second thought I grabbed onto his hand with my free hand.

"Let's go dance for a while."

Drew quickly grabbed his beer off the bar and followed me to the dance floor. I inhaled sharply as Drew wrapped his arm around my waist and pulled me flush against him. I turned my head to avoid Drew's gaze and hopefully he couldn't make out the blush on my cheeks in this dark club. I swallowed my spit and breathed in as I felt his hot breath on my ear.

"Gotta make this shit believable right?"

I nodded as I wrapped my arms loosely around his neck and turned my head to look up at him only for our noses to brush against each other with how close our faces were to each other.

"Right."

"Bravo 6 and Bravo 7 check in."

Drew stood back up straight and I turned my head to look around.

"Do you see him?"

I peered over Drew's shoulder and nodded.

"Bravo 1 this is 7, he just walked in. Sitting at the bar."

"How much security?"

I leaned my head against Drew's shoulder as we swayed back and forth.

"Three men."

"Good copy Bravo 7."

"This could be classified as messy."

"Keep it in your pants 6, it's for the op."

"Right. For the op."

We spent another hour "dancing" and nothing was happening and I was getting fed up. My feet were starting to hurt and I wasn't drunk enough to be here.

"Time for another drink?"

I nodded as I looked up at Drew. He unwrapped his arms from around me and I instantly missed the warmth of his body against mine.

Focus.

He clasped his hand in mine, and we headed towards the bar and towards where our target was sitting. Drew pulled me forward and he stood flush behind me, and wrapped his arm around my waist.

"Two more please."

The bartender nodded and I took a peek over at our target who was just sitting there laughing and smoking a cigarette with his friends.

"If you don't stop moving your ass around like that, we won't be going anywhere anytime soon."

My cheeks turned a light shade of pink as I turned my head to look at Drew.

"Sorry, my feet are killing me. Moving my legs around helps a bit with the pain."

He nodded as he reached up and pushed back a strand of hair that had fallen on my face.

"Here you go."

I quickly turned around and took hold of the beer that the bartender just put on the counter.

"Shit."

"What?"

"He's gone."

"Bravo 1 this is 7 we lost eyes on the target."

"2 you got the tracker on his vehicle?"

"Negative."

"He couldn't of gone far."

"Let's go outside."

Drew nodded and grabbed onto my hand as we pushed our way outside the club. Our target was standing outside by the door smoking another cigarette and I looked over at Drew.

"You were fucking checking her out weren't you?"

I urged him to continue with my little fake fight in order to buy Omar some time to hopefully get a tracker on the guy's car.

"What the fuck are you talking about?"

"I saw the way you looked at her."

"You're a lunatic you know that?"

"Right I'm the crazy bitch."

"You've been checking guys out all night too, including this guy. Yeah I saw the way you looked at him, what does he have that I don't huh?"

I furrowed my eyebrows at Drew. Where was he going with this? He pushed past me and walked straight up to our target.

"Excuse me sir, my girlfriend here seems to think you're better looking than me."

I quickly turned around.

"Oh for fuck sakes, I never said."

"You didn't have to say it, I saw the way you've been looking at him all night."

"I think you need to control your girl."

"Control me? Who the fuck does this guy think he's talking to?"

Drew stepped forward.

"You can't talk to my girl like that."

"Oh yeah, what are you gonna do tough guy?"

He pulled his shirt up revealing a gun tucked in his waistband and I looked over at Drew. We didn't have any weapons it was time to walk away.

"This the type of guy you want babe? A short, fat fuck who clearly carries a gun for show, I bet you don't even know how to use that thing."

I took a step forward and before I could get Drew out of there the guy took a hold of his gun and pistol wiped Drew which landed him on the ground. Come on Omar, hurry up.

"1 this is 2, tracker secured."

Next thing I knew our target was kicking Drew in the ribs as he laid on the ground.

"Bravo 6 what the fuck is going on?"

I looked back and saw Jason standing in the shadows. I quickly focused my attention back on Drew and stepped forward.

"Bravo 6 cut the shit."

"Okay, okay that's enough. Lets just go home babe."

"Yeah I think it's time you take him home."

The target walked off and I quickly bent down to help Drew up.

"What the fuck was that?"

"Anything for mission sucess right?"

I shook my head as Drew stood up. The huge gash on his forehead was gushing out blood, and I sighed as I reached up to check it out.

"I'm fine."

Drew pushed my hand away softly and I nodded.

"Okay. Let's get out of here."

Drew nodded and we walked up the street and met up with the rest of the team. The ride back to the safe house was silent but Jason didn't hold back his dissapointement when we walked inside.

"What the fuck was that?"

"Jase mission was a success."

"It could of been a disaster Ray. Since when does Bravo 6 get to do as he pleases without checking in first?"

"It wasn't all Drew, I was part of it too."

"You should of known better. You told me you could handle going with Drew but clearly not."

"How is this our fault? We had to do something. We were in there for over an hour I think the better question here is why did it take Omar so long to put a tracker on the guys motorcycle ?"

"Coming after your 2IC do you want to get kicked off this team?"

"Right about now, sounds like the best fucking option to me. Clearly you don't trust Drew and I. I've been on this team for almost a year now I should of earned a little more respect than that."

"You'll earn my respect when you stop fucking things up."

"Okay, everybody take a breath. Mission sucess; who cares how we got there right Jason?"

Jason looked over at Drew.

"Get him stitched up."

I nodded and I headed towards the kitchen.

"What the hell was that?"

"Got the job done didn't it?"

"You two looking to get yourself kicked off this team?"

I ignored Sonny and got the med kit and headed towards the table that Drew was standing in front of.

"Can you sit please?"

"I'm fine."

"The huge gash on your forehead would disagree. Sit down."

Drew sighed, and plopped himself down in the chair. I could hear the snickers coming from Sonny and Omar but I just chose to ignore them.

I stepped in between Drew's legs and he let his left hand linger on my exposed thigh, from the dress I was still wearing, for a second before Sonny said something and he quickly pulled his hand away as he turned his head to look at Sonny.

"Guys you're not helping here."

"Oh come on you just need to flash Drew over there and you'll have all his focus."

"How is he not stitched up yet?"

I sighed as I turned around to look at Jason.

"I give up. Stich him up yourself."

I dropped the glue I was holding into the med kit, turned around and walked off. I shouldn't let comments like Sonny's bother me anymore, but they did. I hadn't been standing in the room by myself for more than a minute when Drew walked into the room holding the med kit.

"I'm sorry."

I shook my head as I pulled out a chair and grabbed the med kit out of Drew's hand.

"Why you saying sorry?"

"For those two idiots out here."

I chuckled lightly.

"Sit down."

"Yes ma'am."

I shook my head as I grabbed some gauze and the glue out of the med kit and started cleaning up Drew's wound.

"You know Jason is right, that was a really stupid move you pulled back there."

"Worked didn't it?"

"I guess, but you could of stopped it anytime why didn't you?"

"Because so long as he was focusing on me, he wasn't focusing on you."

I nodded as I finished cleaning up his wound and applied the medical glue before covering it up with a bandage.

"Look (Y/N)..."

"We roll out in ten."

I turned my head and nodded at Brock.

"Copy that."

I turned back around to face Drew.

"What were you gonna say?"

"Not important. We should get out there."

I nodded. We rolled out to check out another target before coming back empty. The tension was still high for the rest of the night and I was hoping that when I went down for coffee the next morning that it wouldn't be as high.

"If I'm sweet on Davis we need to talk about how Drew here is sweet on (Y/L/N)."

I stopped dead in my track as I easedropped on the conversation happening in the kitchen. I've had the biggest crush on Drew since he joined the team but no way he felt the same.

"Yeah right Sonny."

"Oh come on, we seen the way you were looking at her yesterday after the op."

"It's called acting boys. Look team relationship are messy, there's a reason why all three of us are single."

"Right."

"And one night stands are the way to go boys. You get a good fuck with no feelings mixed in."

I put my head down and headed towards the porch to get some fresh air.

"What are you doing out here?"

I chuckled as I looked over at Lisa.

"Probably doing the same thing as you, hiding from the boys."

She nodded.

"Can I be honest with you?"

I nodded.

"Always."

"Whatever is going on with you and Drew, be careful. It can get messy really quickly."

I nodded.

"You and Sonny right?"

Lisa put her head down and I smiled.

"I'm not gonna say anything, you've got my word. I just wish it wasn't so complicated."

Lisa nodded.

"You and me both. I'm just trying to warn you before you get to deep in it. Team relationship never work."

I nodded.

"Thanks for the advice Lisa."

She nodded.

"I better get back inside before Jason explodes at me again."

"Yeah he's been a little on edge this deployment. You're just doing you're job and you're pretty damn good at it so don't let Jason get to you okay?"

"Same goes to you, I heard the beating he gave you yesterday."

I shrugged.

"It is what it is. Being a women in this business is not easy."

"Amen to that."

I smiled.

"I'll catch up with you inside."

Lisa nodded and headed inside. I leaned my forearms onto the railing and sighed. Sure I thought Drew was hot and maybe just maybe we had a thing for a minute yesterday on the op but it was over now and I needed to get my head back in the game.

The next few days were spent hitting different targets and working crazy hours only to be sent home with basically nothing accomplished.

I could tell the guys were going stir crazy by how crazy the team group chat had been going off the last few days since we had been back home. I groaned as my phone buzzed again and again on my bedside table.

I pulled my pillow over my ear and groaned even further when I heard a knock on my door. I ignored the first few knocks but whoever was at the door was persistent so I rolled out of bed looked down at my over-sized Navy shirt and shruggred as I walked to the door. It was close to midnight whoever was at the door was getting me in my pyjamas.

"I swear to god if it's Sonny standing behind this door, I'm gonna freaking lose it."

I pulled open the door to my apartment and the last person I was expecting was standing on the other side.

"Drew."

Next thing I knew my back was up against the wall and Drew's lips were on mine. I quickly gained my composure and kissed him back. As much as I wanted this I couldn't do the whole one night stand thing so I pulled away and wiggled out of his grip.

"What's wrong?"

"I can't do this if it's going to be a one night stand thing."

"What are you talking about?"

"I overheard you one morning talking with Sonny and Omar in Thailand and you said one night stands were you're thing, a good fuck and no mixed feelings, but I can't do this not without feelings."

Drew just smirked as he walked over to me.

"Ever since that night in the club, I keep telling myself I don't have feelings but I do. I like you (Y/N). A lot for that matter and I know this is going to be messy but I don't think I'll ever be a one night stand only guy when it comes to you."

Without another thought I smashed my lips against Drew's and wrapped my arms around his neck as he wrapped his arms around my waist. Davis' word were somewhere in the back of my mind but right now I could care less.

This felt right, and when something feels this right you don't try and fight it right?

[storm-angel989]

hey could you do a Valentino x Daughter Reader where the Vees/Angel finds out that Reader has been starving herself and taking pills that make her lose weight?

Hi there,

So I did write one of these already (check out my master list!) but I wrote another version because you asked to include Angel Dust. Diet pills are another thing I have personal experience with, and I promise you they're not worth it. As hard as it is somedays, our bodies are worthy of love and respect always <3

<3 Mandy

Privacy had never really been a big deal to me. 

Growing up the tech overlord’s niece, I was acutely aware that anything and everything I brought, sent, typed, created, handed in was subject to scrutiny by my Uncle Vox. Not that he went out of his way to divulge into my personal life, but there had definitely been a few times I had been reminded of his power to keep tabs on me. 

It wasn’t until I started dieting to get more into shape for the upcoming school year that Vox’s constant monitoring became an issue. 

It started with the ballerina tea in September. Something my friends at school swore up and down would help me trim down before the holiday season. For the first time in my life, I heard whispers- too big, too small. Just right. Fashion presented in a way even my Aunt Velvette hadn’t shown me. As we thumbed through magazines, shifted through racks of clothes at the local mall, I slowly started to see my friend’s point, and everything my body wasn’t. 

Thoughtlessly, I clicked on the order now button and in minutes, my phone rang.

“Hey, kid. I canceled your order. You can’t drink that stuff, it will seriously mess up your gut,” my Uncle Vox’s voice came through on the line. 

I felt shame spread across my face. Not a single parental figure in my life had ever scolded me for what I wanted to put in my body. Hell, my Dad even let me have ice cream for breakfast one morning when my Mom was out of town. Why was my Uncle Vox even remotely paying attention to what I wanted to drink? Embarrassment. Did he not know just how flawed I was?

Somewhere inside, a little voice told me to keep quiet. 

“Reader? Did you hear me?” Vox’s voice repeated. 

“Ye-yeah, Uncle Vox, sorry,” I squeaked out. “I just…my friends at school they…”

“If your friends at school all jumped off a cliff, would you? I can make a doctor's appointment if you’d like and she can explain exactly what…”

“No, no, Uncle Vox. I’m good,” I replied quickly. “I’ll see you tonight.”

“See you tonight, kiddo.”

I hung up the phone in dismay as cracks in my fantasies began to form. How exactly was I supposed to be thinner if I was hitting a wall trying to use the resources available to me? How was I supposed to look like the models on the cover of Aunt Velvette’s magazines if I kept doing what I was doing? I needed help, but from where? 

My answer lay in the network of friends I had available to me. A quiet whisper- folded notes with paper currency passed in study hall returned with white powder filled capsules. 

Drink a glass of water and take one pill three times a day, the note back read. 

Instructions I could follow easily, and all it took was downing that first pill to get me absolutely hooked. I couldn’t pinpoint when I slowly started to cut back on what I ate, or when the little voice inside my head started to tell me I didn’t deserve food. That the number on the scale was the only thing that mattered and the faster the number went down, the happier the voice inside my head became. Beauty, numbers, purity took over my thoughts. 

As I stared at my reflection in the mirror, I decided that voice had a name. Ana. And she was my only friend in the entire world. 

Two months passed before my world came crashing down. 

“Hey babe, I know you’re on your way out the door, but meet me in my studio afterschool today, hm?” My fathers voice carried across the kitchen. 

I froze. On my normal day to day, I wasn’t allowed anywhere near my fathers business office- or studio, as he called it. I was well aware of what he was in the business of, but he did his best to keep me from it. Or at least, from the worst of it. 

“Why?” I asked, my back turned to him.

“You have a half day. Your Aunt and Uncle both have meetings, so you’ll be doing your homework in my office tonight,” he replied. “And I received several forms in the mail from the school. You need a physical before winter season begins, so we might as well get that done. And then I’ll take you out to lunch. It’s been awhile since we’ve spent time together.” 

The entire thing sounded like my current worst nightmare. I struggled to come up with the words to try to get out of it. 

“But I was going to go to…I have plans, I…”

“Bebita, whatever plans you have, consider them canceled. In my studio, by twelve. The limo will pick you up. That’s all.” Valentino finished. 

An overwhelming sense of dread washed over me. Ana’s voice grew louder, nonsense that I couldn’t discern. No matter how hard I tried,  I couldn’t see my way out of this. Anxiety flooded through me and I worried my way through the entire morning. In truth, I had planned on making up the extra steps I was losing by leaving early at the school gym before I went home. 

Just take an extra dose, Ana whispered. And double each dose, even. Make up for those extra steps missed, and the extra calories I was sure I would end up taking in. A sense of relief washed over me. Of course. Ana always knew what to do. 

I walked into my father’s studio, backpack slung over his shoulder. Noticeably empty was my father’s directors chair. On stage, Angel sat on the bed, wrapped in his pink red trimmed robe. I brightened up instantly. Angel was the only employee of my father’s I knew, the only one I had any sort of relationship with. 

“Hey sweetheart,” Angel said cheerfully. He stood up and walked over to me. “Yer Daddy said you were coming in, how’s school?”

I shrugged. “Fine. Where is Dad?” I glanced at the clock. Twelve thirty. I needed to duck out and take that fourth dose now if I wanted it to be effective. “I have a ton of homework and I want to get started.”

“In a meetin’, but you can use my dressing room,” he replied as he sashayed across the floor. 

I followed him and he pushed open the door, ushering me inside. 

“Trust me, your gonna wanna hang tight, Val- er, your Dad’s mood is gonna be good or bad dependin on how this meetin’ goes,” Angel told me. 

I settled myself on the couch and dug around in my backpack. Behind me, Angel took a seat at his vanity and picked up a brush. I seized the opportunity to unscrew my water bottle and pull out the plastic bag of pills. I had just swallowed the two capsule when a hand plucked the bag out of mine. 

Shit. 

“Hey, kid. Whatcha got there?” Angel asked as he held the bag up to his face. 

“Give those back, they’re mine!” I yelled as I jumped to my feet. “Angel, give them to me!” 

Angel ignored me and instead took the bag over to his vanity. I watched in dismay as he cracked open one of the clear capsules and inspected the contents. 

“How many of these did you take?” He asked.

Silence for a heartbeat. 

“Does your Dad know you’re taking these?” Was his next question.

“No, and I’d appreciate it if you didn’t tell him,” I growled. “Angel, give them back!”

He crossed his arms, plastic bag in hand. “Only if you tell me how many you’ve taken today,” he replied. 

“Four this morning. Four at ten. And I just took four. And I need to take another two tonight,” I replied sharply. “Now give them back.”

Surprise shot across his face. “You took twelve of them? Are you fuckin stupid?” He turned back to his desk and started to rummage through it. “Fucking stupid kids,” he muttered as he came up with a bright orange bottle. I watched as he poured the liquid into the cap. “Here, take this now or I’m goin right to Val,” he thrust the medication to me. “Now, or else. I mean it.” 

“Angel! I…”

“I said, now or I go pull your Daddy from his meetin and trust me, he’s gonna be pissed,” Angel shot back. 

I didn’t doubt any of that. Reluctantly, I took the cap and swallowed the contents. “There, now give me back my pills.” 

“Yeah, I don’t think so,” he replied. He reached out and grabbed my upper arm. “Come with me, otherwise you’re gonna puke all over my dressin room and I don’t think either of us wants that.”

“Angel!” I protested as he practically dragged me across the studio floor. “Angel where are we…” 

He shoved me into the nurses office and yelled to the lady at the front desk to page Valentino. Without waiting, he opened the bathroom door and shoved me inside. My anger turned to pain as my stomach cramped and I felt his hands pull my hair back as I emptied my belly of its contents. 

“That’a girl,” Angel muttered. “Yeah, get it all out.”

“Fuck you Angel, I’m fine,” I snarled. 

“Yeah, cause I make you puke. If I hadn’t, you’d have been dead in about twenty more minutes,” he replied. “Yer Dad’s on the way.” 

“Oh fuck you,” I snarled as the nurse came in. “I swear I…”

Whatever I was going to say stopped as a wave of dizziness hit me. I felt Angel help me kneel to the floor and laid me on my side. The feeling of hands on my chest, my fathers voice as my reality turned black. 

When I came to, I was sitting upright in a hospital bed. Wires attached to my chest and a plethora of monitors surrounded me. A tickle in my throat and I tried to cough as I raised my hand to itch my face. My fingers hit tape and plastic and I couldn’t Groggily, I strained to hear the noise on the other side of the door. 

“Val, I saw it in the mirror. She was sitting on the couch and she swallowed a few, but I got her to tell me how much she took. I had to make her puke or she woulda…” Angel’s desperate voice. 

“Where the fuck did she find that shit?” My father’s voice growled. “How the fuck did my daughter get ahold of that…Angel, just…” His tone shifted to frustration. Silence, and a sigh. “You did the right thing. Probably saved her. Just go, consider this shoot canceled and take the night. Go to the hotel or whatever it is you do, I need to handle this…situation.”

“Just, will ya lemme know when she wakes up?” Angel’s voice pleaded. “Val, if what she took was what I thought, she coulda died.”

“I know. And I will.” My father’s voice was softer. “Go.” 

Time passed and I felt myself slip in out of consciousness. I was vaguely aware of my father fussing, flashes of Angel, my Uncle Vox and Aunt Velvette. But for the most part I stayed asleep. At some point, the tickle in my throat vanished, but the needle in my arm stayed. It could have been a week, or maybe a day when I could I finally held myself awake long enough to hear what was going on. A few blinks, and I could make out my father’s figure standing next to my Aunt and Uncle at the base of the bed. 

“We’re lucky we caught it when we did, she’s lost some weight. Her bloodwork isn’t great, but it’s fixable. It’s more important now that she connects with a therapist and…” said an unfamiliar voice. 

“Daddy?” Even to me, my voice sounded scratchy. “Daddy?” 

Four heads turned to me. The Doctor walked over and began to check the monitors.

“Good to see you awake, baby girl,” my Uncle Vox said as he brushed away an invisible strand of hair. “How are you feeling?” 

“What happened?” I asked as my father sat on the side of the bed. “Why am I in the hospital?”

“Maybe you want to fill us in,” Velvette suggested. 

The doctor cleared his throat. “I would suggest waiting for the thera-”

“Leave us. This is a family matter for the time being,” my father commanded with the authority only an overlord of hell could have. 

I watched as he instantly turned and walked out the door, closing it behind him. My father turned his attention back to me. I hung my head and after a few moments of quiet, Valentino’s voice filled the air. 

“Let me break it down for you. Angel watched you- from the mirror- swallow two pills. You told him those were the twelfth ones you had taken that day. He, because he isn’t a dumbass and has probably taken them himself, recognizes them right away and forces ippapec down your throat. He gets you to the nurse and you vomit until you pass out. I show up, and we decide that your stomach needs to be pumped. Doc asks me how much you weigh and I realize that somehow, since September, you’ve lost about twenty seven pounds. Tell me, muñeca, how exactly does that happen?”

For the first time since this all began, Ana went silent. Without that voice to guide me, I swallowed back my nerves. 

“I went on a diet. I took diet pills, Dad. That’s what Angel got all mad about.”

“And rightly so,” Velvette interrupted. “All diet pills are dangerous, but the ones you took? They’re ten times as strong. Combined with skipping meals, they’ll wreck your body.”

“And don’t try to tell us you wern’t,” Vox added. “I reviewed the footage. We saw it all, honey.”

I looked down at the blanket. “So what happens now? Am I grounded?”

Silence from the three of them. I felt my fathers hand on mine and his finger tilted my chin up.

“I don’t think you quiet get the point. You almost died, honey. I…” 

I watched an expression I couldn’t quite read flit across his face. He took a deep breath before he continued. 

“Here is the plan. Now that you’re awake, you’re going to talk to a doctor. As soon as you get the all clear, you can go home. We can figure out where to go from then, but for now…for now honey, I’m just glad you’re alive.” 

I reached for him and my father folded me into his arms. 

“I’m sorry,” I whispered. “I wasn’t trying to die, I…”

“Don’t be sorry. We’ll figure it out. I promise. I love you, mi amore,” he replied softly. “We all love you. We’ll get through this, I promise.”