#(its ok though bc she's going to ascend with Gale and they're all going to have the most awkward family dinners in the outer planes)

[tuxedo-rabbit]

Oof.

Estryd's return to the temple of Bhaal was painful this time for different reasons.

Estryd's relationship with the temple and her father is a bit more complex in this playthrough. Though she did have a period where she actively resisted it all, she eventually fell in line.

She learned to accept the urge and try to work with it. The temple had, until recently, always been the only safe place she could return to when people learned her true nature and turned on her.

She hates her father but she loves her father. The urge comes from him, it's intrinsic to being the God of Murder. They are the only two beings who can really understand what that means and in Estryd's eyes, that gives them a closeness that she will never have with anyone else. And yet, Bhaal keeps her at a distance. She prays often, he rarely responds. Nothing she does is ever good enough. His control of her life is absolute.

Estryd's issue with the urge has never been about wanting it gone, it's been about wanting more control and independence in her own life. She is a-ok with being the bringer of end times. She has accepted that is what she must be. But until the time comes when she must enact Bhaal's plan, she wants to be allowed to choose not to kill people she doesn't particularly want to, whether that be for pragmatic reasons or because she cares for them personally.

That's it, that's all she's wanted.

When Estryd asked for this at the temple, Bhaal responded by killing her.