#(cuz the parents seemed nice and normal at times and then were murderous monsters at others all 'YOU NEED TO BEHAVE')

[krysmcscience]

Brain attempted to visit a nightmare on me, only to wind up planting itself facefirst into my monster fascination, instead, so now there's a whole ass story outline sitting in my notes, lol

Fucker did still wake me up, though

[steve0discusses]

Yugioh S4 Ep10 pt2: Yugi’s Never Ceasing Commute Continues

Last we left off, it was time to eat. Thank you. Thank you, Yugioh. You get me.

Not one of their better spreads, TBH.

No cheese wheels, too. They are truly living in hard times.

(read more under the cut)

Rex and Weevil decided to look for rare cards in the rubble of Arthur Hawkin’s house.

I don’t know why they bothered with this, everything was very clearly exploded and on fire, but youknow, these two just seem to be very hellbent on being bad at life. Just two jokes that are here just to be jokes, wearing these duel disks that they’re not going to use until it’s finally time for them to betray us. Checkov’s jokes.

And I hate to say this but they really are this season’s Bakura.

I know I just said that.

But this show really likes having at least one character that might turn at any moment and stab our protagonist in the back. They like to have at least one at all times there, hovering over Yugi’s oblivious shoulders, with that figurative knife (or literal, in the case of that time when Bakura stabbed himself without nearly any provocation).

In the past, when Bakura was out to lunch, we would have betraying friends like Kaiba, who would go solo in the middle of his own card game and end up throwing everyone in danger, and also Tristan who got full on possessed by the Big 5 and tried to murder everyone, but I guess after 4 seasons they were like “Youknow...I think Kaiba got over it.” and like...you can’t have Rebecca stab us in the back so lets bring Rex and Weevil.

At least their showtime is minimal, because unlike Bakura, who is pretty likeable even when he’s being an asshole, Rex and Weevil never turn off the asshole and are mostly just visual gags stumbling over eachother. Bakura was quite clever and had a bit of depth and mystery, while I don’t think Rex and Weevil are smart enough to even know how to spell mystery.

And if Rex and Weevil end up being good guys and the saviors of the whole show then my sincere apologies, but they are still kind of grating.

Now Rebecca gets a duel monster’s card that has a death threat on it, which is probably the normal way to sign your duel monsters cards in this universe. I imagine every card in Yugi’s deck has a couple death threats on each of them by now. Probably makes them more lucky.

Ya so...

I can forgive this. The people who made this looked at a map of California, forgot that California is roughly the same size as Japan, and were like “I mean, there’s like 50 states, it can’t be that big.”

But here’s the thing about Death Valley. I am a Californian, but I have never been there. This is why.

Death Valley is ASS to get to. Barely anyone lives there. Nothing goes there. You can’t just take a train, you have to drive there by going south past it and then turning around. It’s real round about and just in the middle of nowhere. May as well get there by flying into Las Vegas, and if you are flying into Las Vegas, chances are slim that you will leave that Vacation Town USA to vacation in a literal desert.

Clearly they saw the name “Death Valley” and got super excited but y’all...there’s a reason why we call it that, and everyone who knows about geography or is a Californian is kind of like “um...is Yugi...going to Death Valley???? That city slicker?”

Cuz this is not a normal desert. Normally, a human can survive 3 days without water, in Death Valley you apparently can only survive for 14 hours. It is the lowest point in the US and also the hottest point in the US and the place where the highest temperature was ever recorded on the Earth. And while that heat is only for 5 months of the year...it’s not winter in the show, is it? It’s fairly warm. San Fransisco wasn’t even foggy?

Like even the Death Valley website is like “please don’t leave the main roads and hike during the hot months” because y’all, this park is damn serious. Like this is one of the only National Parks that has not just one, but multiple ghost towns in it.

Don’t get me wrong, Death Valley’s very pretty and very fun I’ve heard, and it has like a very fancy dayspa in it, and if you like geography and like to rough it, then you will absolutely love how freakin weird Death Valley is. So, if you’re safe and know how to pack your gear, you’ll have no problem, but...Y’all, Yugi Muto, who barely survived Pegasus’ island (and only because Mai fed him) is going to just casually go into Death Valley.

In that outfit.

Then, in some barn somewhere (I have NO IDEA where this exchange takes place) Rafael is grilling Arthur only to realize that this is a very pointless conversation.

And in case you forgot Darts exist, he’s still out there, murdering people off for kicks. we’ll just add 20 more to the death count, the internet told me that’s the average amount of people on a fish boat of average size (although sometimes this boat seemed like the size of a shipping container barge but youknow...)

And in case you missed it, I have been doing the death counter wrong so I was 2 people behind--it’s correct now. With the rate this show goes I feel like we might see death 666 eventually. But, yes we did pass 269 so we’ll have to wait another 100, I guess, because it went to some rando on this boat. Nice.

(The highest surface temperature of Death Valley ((not the air, but the ground)) ever recorded, was 201° F.)

(That’s 94° C for those in the back.)

I mean Yugi is part Pharaoh so I guess he just has a strong attraction to really terrible deserts. He’s also half a dead guy so maybe he also just has a strong attraction to being dead.

But I dunno, maybe this is the months of the year where Death Valley is manageable? Maybe? Possibly? We’ll just assume that it is.

Now you can go horseback riding in Death Valley, as you can in any National Park, but it isn’t real normal to ride your horse all the way from San Fransisco. And like you can’t even let your dog off a leash in Death Valley. This is such a bad park for pets!

Also, I found out some fun facts about horse travel, for anyone interested in writing fantasy and wants to know the average speed of a horse.

So a horse can go about 100 miles in a day, but only for one day. If you do 250 miles, the time has to be more spread out since you must recharge your horse. According to some horse-specialist on the internet who does horse marathons from coast to coast, if you have to do 500 miles, then you average about 24 miles a day, accounting for horse-recovery time and assuming it’s a horse that wasn’t bred for super long distances. (this is about a 500 mi horse ride, ps)

The pony express of old, the iconic Wells Fargo, would actually have horse stations along the prairie, where you would trade in your tired horse for a new horse, so that way you would never have to stop going 100 miles in a day. Since Yugi never changed his horse, this ride would have been absolutely ridiculous, and Copernicus the horse, would have stopped somewhere in Gilroy.

But this is a kid’s show so wtv, we’re gonna ignore that.

(reminder that Yugi decided not to unhitch the perfectly serviceable truck and drive away with air conditioning.)

And Yugi really did make Rebecca promise not to tell these much older teens that he took off (something about how he doesn’t want to put more people in danger yada yada, normal Yugi stuff), but the show kind of blames this on Rebecca...but like...she’s 12. This one is on Yugi.

But, if Rebecca were older, maybe she would have done the same thing. Rebecca seems like maybe the type that realizes that when you like an idiot boy, you gotta let them do idiot things, and make idiot mistakes. You can’t just control what your friends do all the time, unlike this crew, which is controlling because that is the only way they keep eachother alive.

So Joey decides to ignore both of the cars right next to him, and just book it to save his stupid ass friend. On foot. To Death Valley. From what the show insisted was just outside San Fransisco.

And I guess that Rafael decided to just let Hawkins go?

Probably because Yugi got on a horse and Rafael was like “of course I know Yugi is chasing me on horseback off the main roads. Of course I know that.” and then he just...let Hawkins walk all the way back...

Hawkins should be dead, but not yet.

So lets check out Death Valley.

So like...again I just think they probably boarded everything and had a rough idea of “America has a bunch of natural canyons, right?” and didn’t realize that the Grand Canyon was soooo far from California.

There are actually canyons in Death Valley but like...I dunno if the art matches that so much? They aren’t nearly as massive as the canyon situation farther East.

Again this was their art choice that they made and it’s...a choice. And they committed to it.

And this bike thing happened?

This tandem bicycle for children lost among the wreckage of Rebecca Hawkin’s home is like a whole “baby shoes, never worn” short story in itself. Rebecca has nooo siblings or parents, right? She has a really old grandpa who is like 80 and doesn’t bike? Just uh...bringing that up...was this tandem bike for her to hang out with Yugi? Does Rebecca even have friends her own age? She already graduated college.

So much inferred by the bike that I know is just here because it’s a funny joke to see Rex and Weevil on a stupid tandem bike.

So I’ve heard about the bike/car/horse paradox before in regards to this season, (it’s one of the few things I knew about this season before going in) so I’m happy to see I’ve recapped enough Yugioh to see it play out.

The paradox being, if Yugi is on horseback, and Rex and Weevil are on a bike, and the rest are in a car, who arrives first?

Apparently the show itself isn’t even sure because Rex and Weevil can keep up with a horse???

Anyway, the correct answer to the paradox is that everyone not in a car is dead for not bringing any water.

Everyone except for Raphael, who probably put a camel pack into each of his shoulder pads.

OH NOW IT’S AN ANIME.

I don’t get why this is happening. But it’s a thing now. Rafael has either literal or metaphoric wings. Bear in mind I thought Pharaoh was Metaphoric for like 14 episodes. These Icarus wings might just be real. Rafael might have been a card this entire time, and I wouldn’t even blink.

Anyway, if this is your first post of mine you’ve seen of this, my apologies, we’re in S4 and this is very confusing. You can read from S1 ep 1 in chrono order by clicking this very handy link here!

[helpimstuckindreamland]

November 1st-2nd, 30 day lucid dream experiment

November 1st.-2nd 

I was on a "waterboard" at a skate park that looked like an abandoned car wash. I hung out there for a little while trying to make sense of how the waterboard worked on the skate park walls and rims. It seemed like a thin layer of water was constantly flowing on the surfaces. 

We had to wash something with liquid Albuterol. I think it was somthing similar to a car but not quite the same in how it functioned. Normally Albuterol is supposed to help you breathe, for asthmatics. We started playing around with the hose and eventually the whole room was covered in a fog of Albuterol gas. but instead of helping me breathe it was suffocating me, and I worked on trying to wave it away and find a way out of the fog. This was in the desert world I visit. The one that looks post apocalyptic, with the hotel and trailer park. Almost like ghost town Texas. I have a few friends there, they drive around in a van, a very big hispanic family that look like they've succumbed to capitalism and vanity, but not with the superiority complex. They just really seemed to like the style they wore. Very nice family, they've helped me out a lot when I was stuck at a creepy hotel (If I remember correctly I was supposed to meet A suspicious person there but it got too sketchy, that's when I met the family) I've also rode my bicycle through the neighborhoods. There's a huge contrast going from an old transformer looki g power source through a trailer park then through a very nice upper middle class neighborhood. 

Sokka (yes from the show avatar) character and I are traveling through the jungle trying to uncover a murder. He's making fun of my fear of heights and rigidity in not straying from our mission. I'm getting frustrated that he's not taking it seriously. But he's quite funny so I allowed myself a little fun. Until we drop from a vine to a puddle of water at the bottom of a cliff.

I'm under a table making playful banter with my siblings in the next room. Quietly giggling at our jokes focused on how ridiculously child like our parents were. The kids are making dinner, there's more siblings than I actually have. Some are sitting on the couch and our parents come into view a couple of times to stamp out the laughter. I'm not supposed to be there but the adults haven't noticed me under the door, you know the crack between the floor and the bottom of the door? They also didn't seem to notice the topic of our jokes.

Last dream I remember is being sent single file with a bunch of women in red robes to these locker rooms. Everyone took a seat at a mirror and laid their heads down to sleep. I was the only one awake. Or maybe I was also asleep at the mirror and looking from a third person perspective as Someone who seemed to be in charge came in and left a pad of paper with words written in blood on each of them. When they leave I get up from my spot at the mirror to explore. Out of our locker room and into another, I find "half-lings' they were like my group but not as refined. They were a bit too barbaric to be all that sophisticated, and they had suspicious intentions. I felt a warning rise in me as I realized they were hungry and they knew we were close by. I run back to our locker room and try to wake everyone up. No one is moving and I can hear the other monsters in the hall. I take pages from the blood book left behind and shoved a piece into everyone's mouths and they immediately woke up. As soon as the lesser beings came in to eat us we were ravenous and brutally murdered them all by drinking their blood. I think we were supposed to be vampires or something. But as we were drinking from them with the intention of killing- we also drank small amounts from each other to gain strength. I felt how good drinking my comrades blood felt. And the paper with the blood on it seemed to have "awakened" this thirst. It was Like taking a line of coke. a blissful relief and very vivid. 

I thought I had woken up cuz I was looking for a clock and I saw the numbers 12:44, and another set that was changing every other second. But when I had first looked at the changing numbers it was the number 1996, the year I was born. Then the year changed to a different 90s year and then an 80s year. I dont remember the specific years.

It appeared on the side of what looked to be an old computer tower on a desk in the room. I guess it's called hypno-pompic hallucinations when you think you've woken up but you haven't (I get those A LOT). Everything in the room was the same, and I knew there was a desk in the room. But then I remembered the desk was a light colored wood and not a black painted wood. And the desk was against the wrong wall. the image of the real desk was in the background of my brain as I was staring at the fake desk and that's when I knew I was still asleep. I mentally rolled my eyes.

Then I actually woke up.

[ultraclops]

Once more, before the Hiatus!

This one'll be extra short since there were only two new eps.

Fright Wig

For a second I thought the shadow was Orangusnake and Snugglemagne got freaking MURDERED

Why is Badgerclops up playing Xbox Live so late?

"How old are you again?" You never know nowadays...

Angry Gay Cat and Feral Bat Who Just Woke Up

No one: Nobody: Not a single soul: Parents when you explain to them you can't pause an online game: Te̶l͢͝l̡̛ yóu̶͘͞r̢͢ ̵f̢̡͜ri͏è҉ńds̀҉̷ you͟ nee̢͟d t̴̨͞ǫ͡ ̶́͞ģ̴͠o.͞

"Go to bed, kid!", says the guy who's up at 3 in the morning playing GTA.

The Sheriff Gang's here - JESUS CHRIST THE WHOLE CASTLE GOT TRASHED! But Snugglemagne is completely fine for some reason? And why does he want everyone to leave so badly? Oh God, is he a monster or something?

OHGODWHATTHEFREAKINGHELLISTHAT.

"They must not know the truth-" "Truth about what?" JFC Mao you need a bell.

I see Chef Rhett's still scared of Mao after the events of Perfect Adventure. I mean, I'd be cautious around someone who jumped in my face and started shaking me the last time we met. That little "Boo." tho...

Oh my God, Badgerclops legit thought Rhett died and was gonna hide his body. That just begs a lot of questions. Has Badgerclops watched someone die? HAS HE KILLED SOMEONE??

Hey it's the guards everyone loves so much! They seem pretty nice. And...easily distracted by candy?

Excuse me, did Camille just say "A cannon that blasts your greatest fears out of your brain"? Is the Sheriff Gang gonna get hit with it?

Camille's definitely on some sort of drugs right now, 'cuz I don't think seeing everyone as "rainbow fire" is normal. And there goes Honey trying to catch her with a dog catcher leash. Good for her.

Aww Badgerclops is carrying Snugglemagne- wait, exposure therapy? Oh God what's gonna happen...

Ah, so he can't buy groceries but he can build a football field length carnival ride/torture device. Priorities.

Badgerclops is clearly blushing when Snugglemagne starts screaming and I don't know how to feel about this.

Aww Adorabat's gonna use her cuteness to convince Snugglemagne to confess...nevermind it didn't work. Damn she went feral! KICK HIS @$$ BABY!

HOW'D MAO STEAL THE FEAR CANNON?? WHERE'D HE HIDE IT?? HIS SASH??

Ooh boy I'm getting Shadowkeep flashbacks.

So Snugglemagne is afraid of...the Sheriff Gang? Kinda understandable but why?

...is that I Will Survive?

DID CAMILLE JUST SHOOT MAO WITH THE FEAR CANNON?! Ah it was just an imagination sequence.

SNUGGLEMAGNE AND MAO FREAKING SUNG A DUET SNUGGLEMAO RIGHTS

Killing shadows with the power of song and dance! Lovely

Ah, so he was scared of their OPINIONS, not them as people. That makes a bit more sense, but if so wouldn't the shadows have said what he thought their opinions were instead of being silent?

He destroyed the castle because...he saw himself without his wig. Are you kidding. I mean, I'M scared of mirrors but I wouldn't go on a rampage over my own reflection.

Aww they modified his mirror to compliment him that's so cuteee

Sleeper Sofa

So Mao just stashes his weapons everywhere? Not just his bed? And is that a Sai?

Aww look at this artsy girl painting her pictures. Love her

Where did all those boxes come from? Are they doing some spring cleaning? Despite it being fall?

I KNOW YOU'RE UPSET ABOUT THE REMOTE, MAO, BUT PLEASE DON'T YELL AT YOUR DAUGHTER

OOH THAT'S NOT GOOD. OOH THAT'S EVEN WORSE.

"YOU DID THIS!" I see what type of episode this is gonna be. And I don't like it.

When did the Sky Pirates install wire taps into HQ? How many phone calls have they been monitoring? ...did they hear Mao's conversation with his mother in Small?

Ratarang said "F--- it, baby mode"

I love this sequence. It proves the Pirates are smarter than they let on and the transitions are amazing, reminds me of the Best in Show sequence from Baost in Show.

"Where did you get those balloons?" "What are you, a cop?" "Uhh, yeah." DECEASED.

When did Mao become so obsessed with safety? Is it some sort of trauma reaction?

Adorabat reminds me of Tako Maki here.

Okay, what type of couch has built-in laser cannons and robotic legs?! Did Mao have it custom built? Oh God the Pirates are dying.

Everyone's talking about how 'thicc' Mao looks in this scene but my first thought was "WHAT HAPPENED TO HIS SPINE. AND WHY'S HE DOING THE SHAFT HEAD TILT."

I'm referring to my kitchen as Snackopolis for now on.

ADORABAT SWEETIE BE CAREFUL

"I HATE THIS I HATE THIS" I felt that in my heart I felt that in my soul

WHY AREN'T THEY SLEEPING IN THEIR BEDS? Did something happen to their bedroom? ...does this take place after Orangusnake Begins?

Does Ramaraffe know how much of a national treasure she is? She needs to know.

Orangusnake had the perfect opportunity to kill Mao...but he decided to drink sauce instead. I respect that.

Nice callback to SugarBerry Fever with the cobbler OH GOD DAMN IT BC.

OH MY FREAKING GOD WILL YOU THREE JUST CALM DOWN FOR TWO MINUTES.

For some reason this song started playing in my head when Mao started breaking everything.

Orangusnake loves his crew so much awwww!

NGL I didn't get the "I'll pay you with exposure!" joke the first time. I actually had to Google what that meant. Did you know there's a cryptocurrency called Exposure? I thought that was interesting.

They all stop bickering and use their respective items to take out the Sky Pirates! Nice

"Badgerclops...will you help me take out the trash?" "DudeIalreadycompromisedallmyVCRS..."

TONY?! HE NAMED THE SOFA TONY?!

He's so hurt over getting rid of Tony aww

[notorious-titan-productions]

Wanted to draw something that mixed creepy with cute for Halloween this year. Dunno why, just felt like it.

Story Below! Click the read more:

‘Baphomet was - for the first time in an unfathomably long life, even as far as eternal lives go - at a complete loss for words.

She had slain angels. Murdered gods with nary a thought, even toppled empires through nothing more than a gentle whisper into the ears of the right individuals. She was an icon of sin; a monument to all of humanity’s most grievous errors. An infallible demon of the highest order, often being regarded as one of Beelzebub itself’s own elite.

She was...rendered entirely mute. 

By the sight of a mere child.

Under normal circumstances, said child would have been eviscerated without so much as a second glance purely for being in her way. However, these were not normal circumstances.

She was in a human room. In a human household. Judging by the immense tome of eldritch knowledge that lay, opened onto a certain page, in this child’s bedroom...he had summoned her.

He had a fucking racecar bed, for crying out loud.

“...You...summoned me.” Baphomet, one of the most powerful demons in Hell, barely managed to choke out, the sound of thousands of ashen feminine voices speaking at once leaving her maw as she did so. She stared pointedly at the minute, insignificant human-spawn. 

He didn’t really seem to care.

Actually, he seemed delighted.

She was concerned.

“Mhm!” The human maggot gleefully hummed, rocking in his cross-legged sitting position in the centre of the pentagram he’d drawn onto his carpet in crayon.

Yes, his carpet. It seemed like painstaking work, crayons or not. Baphomet somewhat respected the dedication, no matter how misguided.

“So...you have a deal to make.” The goat-headed abomination said it more as a statement than as a question. Honestly, she still wasn’t really feeling of sound mind.

“Mhm!” More rocking. Jittery little human maggot.

A moment of silence took its cue to permeate through the air, now having been tainted with the scent of rot upon Baphomet’s unholy arrival into Human-Maggot’s quaint little home.

“Where are your...breeders.” More questions that sounded more like statements left Baphomet’s rapidly-drying throat.

“Y’mean my parent-th? Athleep!” The maggot answered with a prominent lisp, oddly enthusiastically.

The demon towering over said maggot then took a moment to flick her three yellow eyes over to stare at the cartoonishly-colourful clock on the human’s wall, seeing that it was in fact 5 AM.

An uncertain triple-eyed gaze was then cast back down to Maggot.

This had to be a joke.

“Okay. Your deal?” Baphomet finally relented, the scent of countless gored enemies leaving her maw as she spoke.

The child was still smiling. Did he even have olfactory receptors? Usually her summoners would be grovelling or...or cowering by now, or...dead, or something.

“Welllllll...” Maggot immediately drew out in response, obviously knowing what he wanted but choosing to stall before saying it.

Another moment of choking silence. His tiny feet, encased in croc shoes styled after alligators in a deliciously ironic twist, tapped against the soft carpet beneath him.

“Out with it.” Baphomet growled, already beginning to lose her patience.

The child finally flinched in response. So he COULD emote beyond suffocating happiness. He seemed to take a moment to gather his resolve, before tightly shutting his eyes, pointing to a sizeable red mark on his face, and beginning to speak.

“I have a birthmark on my fathe and it-th really huge and my mom thayth it-th becauth I’m thpecial but I know it-th not and nobody talkth to me in thchool ‘cuz of it so I thaw thith book in the bathement and thought maybeyoucouldbemyfriend?”

...

...

...

What.

Baphomet simply stared.

Then...stared some more.

She blinked!

Then continued staring.

She licked her teeth (in lieu of lips), before saying the first thing that came to mind.

“...You have a tome of ancient pagan summoning spells...in your basement?”

Maggot opened his eyes to regard her dumbfounded question, before nodding embarrassedly. 

A final air of silence.

The author also finally begins tiring of writing the word ‘silence’. 

For the first time in six million years, Baphomet snorted. A mighty gust of hot smoke poured from her nose-hole from the gesture. Then she began chuckling mirthfully, before soon doubling over in raucous, shrieking laughter. She desperately clutched at her stomach, then hugged her ribs as if she’d fall apart at any moment.

Enormous, cloven-hoofed legs kicked out wildly as she lay on the floor, howling with mirth. 

Maggot simply watched, thoroughly humiliated.

Soon enough, though, red smoke billowed from Baphomet’s mouth as her laughter died down and she simply sighed contentedly.

She looked to the human child once more as she lay on her spiny back, rolling over onto her front so that she could look at him eye-to-several-eyes. 

Her four ears twitched in satisfaction. Damn, she’d needed a good lifting of the spirits. Figures that a human-spawn would be the one that did it.

She looked to his birthmark, letting him also take in the multitude of scars adorning her timeless visage.

As was beginning to become the norm for her, Baphomet took a long moment to muse. Under any other circumstance she’d have eviscerated this spawn the moment the word ‘friend’ left his lips. However, something about the child stilled her hand.

He had guts, she’d give him that. Conjuring up a dark lord purely for the sake of chit-chat? Beyond ballsy.

A smile would’ve cracked her lips, if she had any. Or if she could even bring herself to smile.

This kid obviously had no fucking clue what he was getting himself into. Demon-summoning was SERIOUS. He’d have to give her something permanent in exchange for her permanent service as his friend...

...under normal circumstances. But this weird kid had...a charm to him. She never thought she could grow to respect the snotty, dumb-as-bricks human-spawn of Earth, but this one really was unique.

He had style. She had to respect that.

Maybe she’d let this one be a one-off freebie deal.

Just this once.

She wasn’t a monster, after all.

“You know what? ...I think I quite like you, Mag-er...what’s your name?” 

“Jake,” Jake answered confusedly.

“‘Jake’,” Baphomet, Queen of Souls and Slayer of Light, repeated, sampling the foreign name on her many tongues. “...I approve. So, you want to be friends, right?”

Jake’s head lifted slightly, hope beginning to shine through.

“Mhm?”

The demoness thought for a moment, one last time. Killing things *had* gotten pretty old over the last few millennia. Honestly, a lifetime of simple friendship would be a nice change of pace.

Lord knows that Hell was a SHIT social space.

Besides, Beelzebub wouldn’t miss her for a measly century or so.

She looked to the youth mischievously, holding out a hand in a gesture of trust.

“Then it’s a deal, Jake, buddy,” she happily continued, clasping his diminutive hand in hers as he reached out to meet the outstretched paw before gently shaking it in what may have been the most honest deal she’d ever made. Pentagrams carved into her palms glowed a brilliant red, symbolic of the pact she had just formed.

Rising to her feet, bringing Jake with her as she kept his small hand clasped in hers, she stretched with her free arm before looking to her new friend.

“Now then, kid...what’s first on the itinerary?”’

~ Fin ~

Happy Hell-oween, folks. Don’t make friendship pacts with demons.

[saintheartwing]

I’ve Got A Question for YOU

Sans had a question to ask in the Judgment Hall. Can even the worst person change if they just try? But Frisk has a question too. "Do you think that even the best person can change into something bad if everything is against them?" Spoilers for both Pacifist and Genocide route, a rather brutal and accusatory drabble. Don't be afraid to leave reviews or rebuttals.

He held the knife in his hands, quietly looking down at his feet and biting into his lip before he slowly ascended up, up in the elevator. Silence filled his ears as he stepped out...out into a beautiful, long hallway with rising ivory pillars, the Delta Run flanking stained glass windows on all sides as bells faintly rang through the air across the golden hall. Frisk made his way through it towards the doorway at the end before suddenly there, in the middle, stood Sans.

"...hey. you've been busy, huh?" the skeleton inquired, tilting his head ever-so-slightly to the side.

Frisk's body was caked in dust. Like he'd been rolling around in it, bathing in it. The dust of innocent monsters so fully covered the ten year old boy that he almost didn't even look like a child. He looked more like an undead ghoul. His eyes were so deep brown, they were almost red, and the hand that held the knife was slightly shaking, his expression flickering back and forth between a creepy, unnerving grin that looked more like an imitation of humanity than the real thing and a quiet, contemplative gaze.

"...so can I ask you a question?" The deep, normally amiable voice of Sans inquired, the skeletal monster's bony head hung low, his eyes shut, hands in the pockets of his blue ski jacket, the hoodie hung low behind his neck."...do you think even the worst person can change? if they just try?"

Frisk then did something Sans didn't expect.

He sighed, hung his head, and then spoke.

Spoke.

Sans couldn't believe it. At night, he'd have flashes of times and places. He could faintly see the future and the past, of times that could be or that couldn't POSSIBLY be. But of all the times he'd seen himself facing Frisk in the hall when the kid was like this, the kid had never, ever spoken up before the fight.

But now Frisk asked him a question.

"I'll answer that if you answer mine, Sans." Frisk quietly inquired, the brown-haired youth looking up, squarely into Sans's stunned skeletal face. "Do you think that even the best person can change into something bad if everything is against them?"

Sans stared. His mouth slightly gaped before he tilted his head a bit. "...what's that supposed to mean?"

"You got any parents?" Frisk asked.

Sans was quiet before he shook his head back and forth. "died a long, LONG time ago. my eldest brother had to take care of us cuz they were gone and now even he's gone."

"Then you know what it's like to be an orphan." Frisk said. "...it wasn't...too bad at my orphanage, but I hated just...just being passed over again and again. I just wanted out so bad, and I'd heard all the rumors about Mt. Ebott. I fell in and I found the monsters down in the Ruins...found Ms. Toriel. The former queen. That...that nice lady who you told jokes to behind the big door."

Sans stiffened a bit. The lady he'd promised. Frisk continued on, speaking carefully, deliberately.

"She tried to teach me to get out of fights. To just...talk to the monsters until she came to help. Well...it worked...at first. I got hurt a lot, but...but it worked. I managed to talk lots of Looxes and Froggits and Whimsuns out of hurting me. I almost got killed by a Moldsmal, but...well, I finally managed to get to Ms. Toriel's place, and I finally, FINALLY felt...happy." Frisk said, his tone getting softer, warmer as he looked up from the floor, gripping his chest with one hand. "I stayed there for over a week, and she made me Butterscotch-Cinnamon pie, she tucked me into bed with stories, she read to me by a fire, she..."

Frisk began to shudder, and Sans could see tears forming. "...I really felt like I had a mom. A MOM." He murmured. "But after a while I...I started getting kinda stuffed up. The Ruins were pretty small. So I asked her how to leave and...and then she tried to destroy the doorway out. To keep me from leaving. And...and when I...when I said she shouldn't, and I wanted to leave, to-to see what else was out there, she told me about Asgore."

Frisk lowered his hand from his chest and his tone slipped into a briefly dark growl. "...I had noticed there was stuff belonging to other kids in her home. Even though the pictures she had only showed ONE human kid and a cute little goat boy. But I was darn sure neither of them were the kind who'd wear BALLET SHOES. Like the ones I found in the closet. That's when I first learned about the Six. And learned that if I left, I'd die. And so I had to prove myself...

And I died. For the first time."

Sans's eyes widened as Frisk cringed. "I burned...to death...in front of her. I-It-it HURT, Sans! Do you have ANY IDEA how much it hurts to die?! To BURN TO DEATH?! It was agony all over! It was nothing but endless heat and I was screaming and screaming!" Frisk screeched, gripping his hair. "ALL because she just couldn't let me out! And I sometimes keep dreaming about that, the very first time, the FIRST time I died, because the SECOND time, oh WOW, did you NOT keep an eyesocket out for me, cuz I GOT MY HEAD CUT OFF BY ONE OF THOSE STUPID SNOWDRAKES!" Frisk screamed, shaking his fists at his side as Sans took a nervous step back.

"h-hey, e-easy kid-"

"I forgave Toriel! She didn't MEAN to, she LOVED me, she was so nice, so I forgave her! It hurt all over, but I forgave her because I know she didn't want to hurt me! But Snowdrake and his dumb friends DID, and they cut my head off! And that wasn't even the first time, cuz OHHH, did I die so many times against the Royal Guard!" Frisk said, punching the nearby pillar. "Axed through the chest! Sliced into chunks! Crushed by a giant armored dog! Over and over! And your brother, I..."

Frisk took in a deep breath. "...I thought he was funny. I really liked him. I could see he was lonely too. Lonely like me. And it looked like we wouldn't fight." Frisk murmured. "...but then he knocked me unconscious and tossed me into his shed. It kept happening so often I dunno how many times, it all started blurring together...three? Four? I lost count."

Now Sans was beginning to visibly sweat as Frisk's gaze became accusing. "But OHHH, now we get to Waterfall. I thought I'd gotten good at dodging. I actually got past all the other monsters just fine! But UNDYNE, oh, did she prove me wrong!" Frisk snarled. "That...that BIG BULLY! I was begging her, screaming that I didn't want to fight her! I just wanted to be friends, and she wouldn't accept my mercy! She tossed boulders at me! Impaled me through every part of my body! Kicked me off the high rise platforms! 28 times, Sans! She killed me TWENTY! EIGHT! TIMES!" He yelled furiously, taking a step towards Sans as he shook slightly in fear. The red in the eyes was gone. Now it was just a furious, baleful brown.

"l-look, uh, wh-why don'tcha put the knife down and-"

"She wants to talk about cowardice when she's HURLING SPEARS AT AN UNARMED KID IN A BALLERINA'S TUTU?! SHE'S the coward!" Frisk screamed. "You ALL are for trying to kill an unarmed kid! And you already killed six! I'm not surprised Undyne's so strong, how many has SHE killed to get that high a LV?" Frisk wondered aloud, bitterness seeping into every single word as he shook and shuddered with raw fury. "Oh, but I got away eventually. And then I met Alphys. I didn't die QUITE as much in Hotland with her helping me, I mean, don't get me wrong, being BLOWN UP BY PYROPES sure hurts, but for once, for ONCE...it looked like someone was really looking out for me. Giving me real advice. Unlike some people I could mention!" Frisk snarled, pointing an accusing finger at Sans.

Sans was now stepping back more and more, as Frisk kept slowly stepping forward. "l-look, I-I didn't-"

"Alphys seemed so lonely too. She seemed like she didn't believe in herself, and I felt bad for her." Frisk said, stopping as he turned to the side and closed his eyes, quietly sighing. "She seemed so unhappy, and...and being friends with her made me feel good. Because I could tell she wanted to impress me, and that made me feel better about myself. Like...wow. Someone really looks up to me, someone...someone thinks I'm so cool. Like an actor on TV they really love and wanna show off to. I...I really liked that." Frisk said happily, wiping his eyes on his dusty sleeve. "Then Mettaton told me the truth, that she'd been making up stuff, putting me in danger just to bail me out. But I could forgive her, cuz she seemed to really be so sad and she just wanted a friend." Frisk murmured. "But then she told me to get free of the Underground I'd have to kill someone."

Frisk cringed. "...I'd have to kill Asgore. And that...that was something I couldn't forgive. That'd she'd keep that kind of secret from me hurt me more than anything else she did." He murmured out. "...why do people have to lie and keep secrets anyway? Honesty's the best policy for a reason. It's not just a virtue for nothing." The ten year old child mumbled. "And Asgore, I, I KNEW he'd murdered the other kids. But I could tell he didn't want to. The minute I looked at him, I KNEW."

Frisk turned around, back facing Sans as he put the knife down and sat on the ground, covering his face. "I knew he didn't want to hurt anyone. He was too nice and sweet and he was so afraid of me. Afraid of hurting me. I could tell he didn't want to kill me. He didn't even have it in him to look at me during the fight. He told me he didn't deserve mercy. And I wanted to forgive him..."

A long...painful silence. And then...

"And then I died again...and again...and again. At his hands. 10 times. And I couldn't take it anymore, Sans. I was just so...SO mad. And I wanted to hurt all of you like you hurt me again and AGAIN AND AGAIN!" Frisk whispered. "And when I first landed down here, I...I had this person guiding me. Not Toriel. SURE as hell not YOU!" He yelled, whipping his head around at Sans to glare at him. "No, she-she said her name was Chara."

Were it possible to turn whiter than white, Sans would have done so on the spot.

"She kinda appeared sort of...like a wisp out of the corner of my eye, and-and I could hear her in my head and my heart. She said she'd guide me through the Underground but she kinda wanted me to beat people up if they attacked me. And the more I died, the more...angry she got that I wasn't fighting back. To her, it was Kill or Be Killed. And because I kept getting KILLED, I...I finally decided...no. I'm not going easy on any of you anymore. She kept telling me that was wrong, hurting them back was right, so I listened, Sans. And I hurt you all. Over and over. Just like you hurt me. Just like you hurt the other kids."

Sans frowned, the skeletal monster stepping forward a bit. "w-wait, that's not-"

Frisk gripped his legs tightly, whipping reddened, tear-filled eyes at him. "It's TOTALLY fair! I read the plaques in Waterfall, Sans, I KNOW you guys had stolen human souls before! I saw that picture of a monster with human souls absorbed into them, and the plaques got made BEFORE Chara fell, so that means you guys had stolen human souls before! I get why we sealed you down here! We were all scared you'd turn into soul-stealing beasts that'd probably go after all our kids, right?!"

Sans cringed a bit, rubbing the back of his neck. "...well...sorta, yeah...pretty much..."

"Well you proved us RIGHT, cuz that's EXACTLY what you turned into!" Frisk screamed. "And yeah, sure, blaming people for what their ancestors did over a thousand years ago is TOTALLY fair! But you know what?! As scummy as everyone else in the Underground was, for all the times they tried to hurt me, or for how they betrayed me, YOU?! YOU'RE the one I'm the most pissed at!" Frisk yelled, rising up, fists at his sides, shaking angrily. "Where were you when those dumb teens kept killing me?! Where were you when Greater Dog launched me off an icy cliff!? Where were you when Muffet ate me alive?! And where were you...when Paps was dead?!"

Sans's sockets grew dark as Frisk's tone turned baleful. "I could get not fighting me at first. You'd been shocked. Afraid. Unsure. But after seeing UNDYNE die, even after getting so powerful, to not do ANYTHING to try and stop me until I reach this place?! To not step in and try to kill me after you see Undyne melting away?! Where were you when I was going through Hotland? Cuz ALPHYS at least, for how cowardly she gets, was trying to evacuate people! You just twiddled your thumbs and stayed in this stupid hall!" Frisk snarled, gesturing around at the golden hall about her, nostrils flaring. "You're a completely lazy coward! And you hide behind the idea of "nothing matters so why bother" to cover up the fact that you don't wanna TRY! Because if you try and fail, then you've only yourself to blame, and you're too scared to really try! You’ve only started trying when there is LITERALLY nothing else to do! You're the worst person in the Underground! At least Undyne died trying to save a kid! At least Papyrus didn't actually kill me! At least Toriel tried to care for me and look after me! At least Asgore APOLOGIZED for trying to hurt me! And even Mettaton tried to stand up to me for Alphys's sake! I have more respect for Muffet, she's selfish but she owns up to it! I don't expect ANYTHING from that mean lady but-but I! I!"

Now Frisk was blubbering, snot coming down from his nostrils, fists clenched tightly, tears flowing freely. "I thought you would help me! Y-You said you'd keep an eyesocket out for me! I thought I could trust you, and all I did was DIE! And you wanna call ME a demon and a monster after everything all of YOU did?! You're HYPOCRITES! Especially YOU, you...you...you FUCKING COWARD!"

And with that final, furious, bile-filled bellow, Frisk finished, panting and heaving, chest rising up and down as Sans closed his eyes, quietly bowing his head.

"So I'm gonna ask you again Sans. Do you think...even the best person can become bad...if everything is against them?" Frisk finally said.

Sans slowly opened up his eyes, tears softly brimming in his sockets. "...yes."

"...that's the answer, Sans." Frisk muttered, picking the knife up...and tossing it away, making it bang against the wall as he flopped down onto his knees, gripping them tighty with his dusty little hands, head bowed as the tears freely flowed. "...and it's my answer too."