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koushirouizumi · 3 years

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* d o . n o t . r e b l o g [likes ok]

title: donor pair: taishiro[u], hinted koushiro x past not-quite-partner implied summary: original version of an old vent-fic bc im battle-worn & tired warning: bit of angst-y introspection over-the-years style but otherwise a good end

Koushiro Izumi is five years old when his parents bring home a computer. * Koushiro is eight years old. His family registry is displayed clearly {before him} . His parents don't know that HE KNOWS .

{ HE ALWAYS KNEW } * [ in another place , ] Koushiro is eighteen years old. He finished high school long ago. * Koushiro is twenty years old. Does he even want a family ? * Koushiro is in his early twenties. His parents are once again celebrating their anniversary. He smiles at them yes I WANT A FAMILY * Koushiro ages some years. ‘ Maybe if I TRIED, ... ’ * He gets put on A WAITING LIST for a d o p t i o n {... a waiting list ...} [....?] * Koushiro is around twenty three years old. HE'S STILL WAITING FOR A REPLY. * Koushiro is twenty four years old (or so) when he realizes for the second time exactly how broken the systems across the world really are. * [ in another place , when he is in University , BUT NOT AS A STUDENT --- ] Koushiro Izumi is twenty five years old when he MEETS TAICHI YAGAMI. * Koushiro is a few years older. He could wait FOREVER if he HAD TO, but ... ... * [ the ORIGINAL WORLD ] Koushiro is hitting his late 20's when he reads about {that} technology. Koushiro wonders. " If this technology had been around before , to help my mother , {would I not have BEEN A D O P T E D ? "} ... He's not sure how he feels about these thoughts. { It hurts, a little, maybe -- or, more }

{ he doesnt want to think about it anymore } * [ the ORIGINAL WORLD ] Koushiro is hitting his thirties. {He's STILL WAITING.} He wonders " Am I being " " SELFISH " for considering ‘THIS’ INSTEAD ? After all, {THIS} SHOULD BE EASY , R I G H T ? * [ the ORIGINAL WORLD ] Koushiro is in his early thirties when he meets her. SHE'S NOT THE ONE HE WANTS . SHE ISN'T " HIS WIFE " ... But , her, too, he cares about her, too * " Didn't you want a family ? " she asks , ... Koushiro nods , mutely , she smiles , " You're not being selfish . " * Koushiro is a father not much later * Koushiro is in his thirties when he realizes he's A D O P T E D this girl all the same .

{ ITS - ALL - THE - SAME } * [ the ORIGINAL WORLD ] Koushiro is in his thirties when he once again meets Taichi Y a g a m i . *

#koushirouizumi posts #koushirouizumi fic #koushirouizumi text #koushirouizumi text post #koushirouizumi response fic #c: koushiro #izumi family #koushiro x oc #(OC is basically tall with dark reddish to auburn brown hair and similar dark eyes)#(except shes definitely taller than Koushiro and has an air of mystery and confidence about her but is also Soft TM)#(dresses in moderately modest but mature clothing probably)#(not necessarily full on modesty but she doesnt hate it either)#(anyway this was most of the original draft with some significant parts added back in that i cut out from the older version)#(out of hesitance bc i didnt want to cause confusion but like)#(Genuinely. im getting tired of walking on eggshells around this fandom when it comes to bionorm@tivity issues and the like)#(Ppl who think @doption through systems solves everything as if my own parents werent put on a waiting list for. over. 2+ years)#(for both my older sibling AND ME)#(every time i think about the issues they had i want to scream eternally)#(i might not even had been born and tbh i might have been ok with that if it meant another child was loved)#(but maybe if i hadnt waited so goddamn long to get that @ncestry test done)#(if i hadnt waited so long to contact them)#(so forgive me for ranting about how awful other S.J. lurker ppl in this f@ndom can be in many instances when im dwelling on these issues)#(maybe i could have actually met my donor parent if i hadnt WAITED)#(because i was so tired and stressed over f@ndom issues and negativity and ppl i blocked lurking my blogs)#(ive at least learnt more details since from their family passing on some but it still godd@mn hurts)#(like . i could write actual in depth thought on these issues but instead NOOOOO were STILL FIGHTING over allowing M-spec HCs to exist)#(anyway idgaf i wrote this while thinking of my bio parent WHO PASSED so you know pls just . let me be . god)#(i didn't even find out they passed until day after their death aka July around this time 2 years ago because they passed so fast overnight)#(anyway Koushiros daughter is donor child in my verse and ppl can Leave TM if they dont like it. Taishiros son is @dopted too anyhow.. Yeah)

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