#((old man rambles about how love is the most fickle of bitches and takes actual WORK rather than just BOOM DISNEY MAGIC))

[underground-boss-clay]

Hello, Gym Leader Clay.

I'm writing to you concerning your romantic relationship with Gym Leader Drayden. If... it is not presumptuous to ask, I was hoping to inquire about the beginnings of your relationship. What... what exactly was it that made you realize you were experiencing romantic attraction?

Ain't no problem ta ask. Just that the answer ain't machine cut clean. 'Course, it'd be easy ta give you that "you'll know on yer own" kinda garbage but I ain't the sort ta lie like that.

See, it's been brought up a coupla times on here, but Drayden wasn't the first relationship I was in. An' well, I knew I loved her. Not think, knew. The feelings I had round her were... Intoxicating. Like there were Beautifly 'n my gut, an' even the rainiest days with her could be sunny. Jus' seein' her made the day brighter somehow. 'Cept well, love don't last long without a decent foundation, an' turns out we didn't have one. Ain't gettin' into the grit of it but the tougher times got, the harder it became to love her--ta stay 'n love with her. Them gut-Beautifly died down, sunny days got cloudy, but I--we both thought we were close enough friends that we could sort things out. ... We didn't. An' that's on both sides, mind: we didn't talk much bout our problems, an' so they just built up an' rotted the already-shaky foundation till it all fell apart under us. Whatever love we had didn't last as long as we were told it would.

An' then, a' course, the part ya actually asked fer. The feelings fer Drayden didn't come up right away honestly--hell, I didn't even realize 'em right away. We'd been friends fer so long, an' he'd been there fer so much a' the bad times, at first I just thought that what I was feelin' was appreciation fer him stickin' by me despite bein'... well, more disliked 'n usual at the time.

It took some long thinkin' before I realized what I was feelin' again, an' uh... well I didn't like it right away. Not only was I unsure after... Errythin' that happened with Celia, but growin' up I was told that feelings towards another man weren't somethin' a fella should act on. Sure I'd had them before growin' up, but as they passed quickly I figured it was just a normal, if intrusive, kinda thought? So why was it comin' back tenfold towards Drayden? I didn't get it.

An' then Mildred hit me over the head with the "it has been how fuckin' long an' you don't know what 'bisexual' is" hammer. ... In my defense it weren't covered when I was growin' up.

But talkin' with her made me realize that I jus' had to bite that bullet an' come clean to Drayden bout how I was feelin'. Even if he didn't return the feelings, least it wouldn't be hangin' over my head no more an' we could find somewhere ta go from there, either still as friends or... not.

Course, y'all know what musta happened. Not only did we talk bout how I felt, an' how he felt back, but we also kept talkin' afterwards, bout how ta deal with each other's issues, disagreements... We stayed as friends, jus'... made sure our foundation was sturdier before we built on top a' that.

Boilin' it all down though, yer gonna fall 'n love with people, they'll make every moment with them feel the best, but it's gonna take work ta make it actually last ferra long time.

[tb5-hellbound]

here is a long ago conversation about talented amateurs, between me and a much better writer

if it’s of interest to anybody, here’s a long ago conversation I had with a very dear friend (and the best writer I know), about this story and the shape of it. it probably would’ve taken place around November of 2018, which is wild to remember. My daughter was 3. I was in the middle of moving house. TAG still hadn’t aired S3. I came to know so much about this story that it’s surprising to remember that I didn’t know when I wrote the first chapter that it even WAS a first chapter.

and not featured here, but still necessary to thank personally for putting up with similar ramblings over the course of the past two years are @space-baegel, @scribeofred and @drdone. 

Anyway. Here’s a behind the scenes glimpse at what I knew in November of 2018. Thanks for reading <3

Prelude 9:27 pm also i have another 2k in TA Kate 9:27 pm and you do not have enough hours in the day Prelude 9:27 pm and they are about to have a Big Talk Kate 9:27 pm OOOOH KHNDFKLVGERUILG i just got SO excited Prelude 9:27 pm no and I have a small person sitting on my lap yelling SUPER JUMP SUPER JUMP and not finishing her pizza Kate 9:28 pm hahshaaha she is my spirit animal except i would have finished the pizza in the first 30 seconds Prelude 9:29 pm hahaha yeah she got distracted by puppy games on her phone Kate 9:29 pm oh well then that is understandable Prelude 9:30 pm the problem is she still sits on my lap and she weighs forty pounds she is 3’6" and people think she’s a six year old Kate 9:31 pm she sounds exactly like my cousin sam she’s going to be TALL Prelude 9:31 pm oh yeah freakish Kate 9:31 pm are you and hubby tall? Prelude 9:31 pm oh yes Kate 9:31 pm both? Prelude 9:31 pm I’m 5’9", he’s 6’1" Kate 9:31 pm ahhh yess Prelude 9:32 pm I’m the shortest member of my family, although that may have changed Kate 9:32 pm but good height comparison between the two of you Prelude 9:32 pm My sister tells me she’s 5’7" I do not believe Kate 9:32 pm i would like to be 5’7" or even 5’5" Prelude 9:32 pm oh no kate are you tiny i write Penelope as very very tiny Kate 9:32 pm yes, i relate like in TA when you wrote that bit about gordon hovering above her i am her height Prelude 9:33 pm ehehehehehe Kate 9:33 pm so i could completely visualize it Prelude 9:33 pm niiiiice i love me a good height difference Kate 9:33 pm i mean anyone can visualize it but i mean i have been there lil lol i like guys at like 5’10" Prelude 9:33 pm Not Too Tall Kate 9:34 pm the 5’9" or 5’10" is great for my height YES EXACTLY Prelude 9:34 pm She wears like crazy high heels also like she’s wearing platform stilettos half the time. Kate 9:34 pm right i used to, i miss heels Prelude 9:34 pm i love a girl in Good Shoes Kate 9:34 pm i like opportunities to wear heels i haven’t in like a full year ME TOO! Prelude 9:34 pm (spoilers gordon is going to discover that he has a bit of a Shoe Thing) Kate 9:34 pm OH YES I AM READY Prelude 9:35 pm hahahahaha you just sit on the sidelines and cheer everytime I say these sinful things about this very good boy Kate 9:35 pm because i am the biggest, biggest fan of said sinful things Prelude 9:35 pm good, you keep me going Kate 9:35 pm really, just the biggest fan Prelude 9:35 pm It is very helpful Kate 9:35 pm i will be your cheerleader i am that peron person that wants the gritty stuff i want the details Prelude 9:36 pm bless your heart but also like I don’t think I’ll ever get to SMUT territory Kate 9:36 pm keeps me going Prelude 9:36 pm I just like writing like Kate 9:36 pm right Prelude 9:36 pm passions Kate 9:36 pm not that i would expect you too Prelude 9:36 pm not that I couldn’t either Kate 9:36 pm but you tow the line like where you are with TA is Prelude 9:36 pm I walk that tightrope Kate 9:36 pm perfect Prelude 9:36 pm the artful cutaway Kate 9:37 pm b/c then it’s really all left up to the imagination to fill in what you please yes! Prelude 9:37 pm the “oh by the way I can hold my breath for four minutes and I played clarinet in highschool” like Kate 9:37 pm i like that more than actual smut Prelude 9:37 pm subtle yknow Kate 9:37 pm LOL Prelude 9:37 pm see, you get it 😉 Kate 9:37 pm but you say things like"fuckfest" and it makes me happy b/c the deed was done, but again your imagination fills in the details Prelude 9:38 pm exactly and honestly the hardest thing about writing this stuff is writing what they’re both actually doing because I can’t just have the pair of them lying there but i’m very bad at visualizing I need like a pair of very bendy barbies artist doll things Kate 9:39 pm i like it when it’s right there, right at the edge, but then you (as the reader) take it there b/c we all have our own ideas and interpretations of events and what should happen and the way it happens Prelude 9:39 pm yeah! Kate 9:39 pm lol right Prelude 9:39 pm like, i will give you all of the bricks and all of the mortar you fit 'em together Kate 9:39 pm yes, love it! Prelude 9:40 pm ahhh but also like Kate 9:40 pm aw dang now i need more, prelude Prelude 9:40 pm well I mean also like, talking about the terms of their relationship and the fact that they’re going to have a relationship or at least see what happens Kate 9:41 pm i need it okay Prelude 9:41 pm oh man kate if I keep it going there’s gonna be So Much drama with Scotty Kate 9:41 pm like romance is also my New Thing okay like WAIT WAIT WHAT ABOUT DRAMA WITH SCOTT Prelude 9:42 pm oh yeah Kate 9:42 pm TELL ME MORE Prelude 9:42 pm if Gordon gets Penny pregnant, Scott is gonna rip him the fuck in half Kate 9:42 pm BUT LIEK like i don’t care i need it i need to see how it shifts the dynamics for all of them Prelude 9:42 pm oh yes it’s gonna be like, to the point of massive overreaction, almost for a Reason Kate 9:43 pm but that fits with scott i would expect that from scott does it have to do with age Prelude 9:43 pm well, i think for Scott the thing is that he like got a girl pregnant when he was in high school Kate 9:43 pm with scott stepping into dad role OMG YES keep going i am so excited Prelude 9:43 pm and she didn’t keep it, and that was for the best Kate 9:43 pm there are 5 boys in this family you can’t tell me an oops didn’t happen at least once Prelude 9:44 pm But he hates himself for being so irresponsible and stupid and impulsive and young Kate 9:44 pm yes yes yes the scott/gordon dynamic i am fucking HERE for it Prelude 9:44 pm me too But this is also just such a huge thing for Penelope because like her whole life and this was just supposed to be a sort of “well we’ll see” kind of a thing and the first impulsive night they have together, the unthinkable happened and of course she’s not on birth control, she hasn’t been in a serious relationship in a couple of years now And why would he have brought condoms to his grandma’s birthday party and they both should’ve thought about the potential for this consequence, but there’s such an afterglow and it seems more important to think about their relationship and neither of them figured this could happen Kate 9:46 pm right right and passion is like a real fucker that changes everything Prelude 9:47 pm no pun intended Kate 9:47 pm HA Prelude 9:47 pm and they were both looking forward to that courtship phase like Kate 9:47 pm but passion is a fickle bitch, it’s all about the moment she comes for even the most sensible Prelude 9:48 pm the thing that’s going to happen in this chapter is that she’s going to say “okay, let’s do this right. would you rather I took you out for valentine’s day or for your birthday?” “And would you rather go to Paris or Nice?” Kate 9:48 pm oh man grabby hands i’m super excited for the scott parts of this like i love the g/p part too obvs but what scott would go through would be a big Thing he is very emotitonal Prelude 9:49 pm oh yeah Kate 9:49 pm emotional Prelude 9:49 pm I think like Gordon doesn’t know about Scott’s thing And like john or somebody sort of has to take him aside and quietly explain Kate 9:50 pm also, you may not have ever even gone here, but due to my recent obsession, that then makes me think of virgil and kayo if they’re messing around too to be careful shit happens any of them, really, i guess Prelude 9:50 pm oH yeah Kate 9:50 pm i wanna be inside scott’s head when the news comes out Prelude 9:50 pm no they are fanatically careful and they are like Kate 9:50 pm so they are like straight up doing it though? Prelude 9:50 pm no, they’ve been doing this for like a year and a half No one knows Kate 9:50 pm like they are THERE Prelude 9:50 pm Oh yeah They are total fuckbuddies Kate 9:50 pm OH WAIT really? that long?! Prelude 9:51 pm oh yeah Kate 9:51 pm wow, that’s even ebtter better Prelude 9:51 pm no, they have a Thing They have a System Kate 9:51 pm also, i am super impressed that they kept it quiet for that long Prelude 9:51 pm Oh yeah Kate 9:51 pm which makes sense considering kayo Prelude 9:51 pm Yeah, entirely Kate 9:51 pm is special ops or whatever Prelude 9:51 pm I think Virgil’s just like I mean Kate 9:51 pm but like, i dunno, i love it Prelude 9:52 pm I think he’s the place where everybody else goes with secrets Kate 9:52 pm and i kinda like looking at the various dynamics Prelude 9:52 pm but he’s insanely good at keeping his own Kate 9:52 pm of what is and what isn’t YES i’ve always headcanoned virgil that way too Prelude 9:52 pm I think Somebody might know about Virgil hahahaha I also kind of I mean like Kate 9:52 pm wait tell me about the system Prelude 9:52 pm there’s a place I wanna go with Virgil Kate 9:52 pm i am sorry Prelude 9:52 pm haha I don’t know much yet Kate 9:52 pm i hijacked this conversation Prelude 9:52 pm but it’s like no no, it’s cool Kate 9:53 pm from pen and ink to virgil Prelude 9:53 pm No, I gotchu fam Kate 9:53 pm and kayo lol but i have thought lots about the first 2 Prelude 9:53 pm I think they have like Kate 9:53 pm and v/k is new and exciting for me lol WAIT THIS PLACE TELL ME MORE Prelude 9:53 pm hahaha well like I mean, it’s meant to be sort of an overall examination of relationships in the family Kate 9:53 pm yes yes Prelude 9:54 pm and how some of them know some things about each other and some of them know other things and some things are secret Like, Scott/Jane have a secret relationship, but I think like Alan knows or something Alan also still kind of has a thing for Kayo, but he’s aware that it’s dumb and he needs to get over it but he’s still gonna be really hurt if he finds out about her and virgil Kate 9:54 pm awww yeah Prelude 9:54 pm And then like I waaaaaant like Kate 9:55 pm poor ala alan just in general Prelude 9:55 pm like, there’s sort of two major ships with Virgil are V/B and V/K. and I kinda wanna go both places. I think Virgil is bi, but people tend to assume he’s gay. And I think maybe for a while he and Brains were kind of a thing, but also with that same sort of secrecy, and not like, in the fuckbuddy kinda way. I think they did more like traditional dating, just out of curiosity. But that hasn’t been a thing in ages, and they basically came to the conclusion that they’re happier as friends. Kate 9:57 pm hmmm would you try to explore both within this universe? Prelude 9:57 pm I think so. Kate 9:57 pm like the TA universe? wow! girl, you’ve got your work cut out for you! Prelude 9:57 pm Mostly just because I want Gordon to get mad as hell at Virgil, for having fooled around with the only two people on the island that they’re not related to, “you enormous lumberjack slut.” like, i want FIGHTS Kate 9:58 pm hahahahahha Prelude 9:58 pm “you beefy plaid whore” Kate 9:58 pm i don’t know why, but i have a hard time seeing brains in any sort of relationship with anyone Prelude 9:59 pm Yeah, that’s fair Kate 9:59 pm maybe it’s because i never formed an attachment to him? Prelude 9:59 pm I hear you Kate 9:59 pm or because he’s always like WORK SCIENCE OOPS Prelude 9:59 pm I mostly like the idea of Virgil being secretive about his personal relationships to the point that people assume he doesn’t have them. Kate 9:59 pm but also i LOVE the insults from gordon you beefy plaid whore HHAHAHAHA so virgil/kayo would end up coming out? Prelude 10:00 pm “you flannel strumpet” “there are two people on this island you don’t share dna with and you fucked both of them” (he didn’t, actually) (also scott knew about virgil/brains being a thing and this is why he thinks virgil is gay) Kate 10:00 pm like a total accident? how would gordon know? i wanna see this fight Prelude 10:00 pm Oh yeah, they’re in better shape than anyone else Kate 10:00 pm hahahaha Prelude 10:00 pm I think it comes out in one capacity or another Kate 10:00 pm hahahhahahaha the insults are amazing how would scott feel about that? Prelude 10:00 pm Either Virgil owns up for some reason, possibly to keep Scott from really tearing into Gordon Kate 10:00 pm with his whole secret jane thing oooh you know that is EXACTLY what virgil would do try to reason Prelude 10:01 pm i think there’s a massive blow out Kate 10:01 pm ooooh no i’m getting even more invested in v.k now Prelude 10:01 pm and Virgil grabs John and is like “okay, I’ll take Scott, you take Gordon.” Kate 10:01 pm like, what happens from there OOOH OOOH Prelude 10:02 pm i think V probably goes to Kayo and says “okay, i think I need to talk to Scott about us” Kate 10:02 pm KEEP GOING TELL ME MORE Prelude 10:02 pm And she’s like “MMMMMMM NOT SURE I DIG ON THAT, THERE IS LITERALLY A SMOKING CRATER WHERE GORDON WAS STANDING” “yeah but that’s why we gotta” I think John’s a bigger factor for Gordon vs the whole potential parenthood thing because I’ll always write him as aro/ace But he’s also the person with the closest analogue to a child, in EOS Kate 10:04 pm okay okay although, scott too Prelude 10:04 pm Oh yeah Kate 10:04 pm kinda assuming father role Prelude 10:04 pm Oh totally Kate 10:04 pm oh man oh man sarah Prelude 10:04 pm “I’m just telling you what Dad told me when I did this” Kate 10:04 pm you have no idea the kind of feels i have right now OH OOOH MAN Prelude 10:05 pm Gordon being like “excuse me, I did not knock up a cheerleader I’d known for three weeks in the back of Grandpa’s truck when i was seventeen” Prelude 10:06 pm “if the great state of kansas had an age of consent any younger than sixteen, what you did would’ve been statutory” then probably there’s some punching Kate 10:06 pm ooooh shit lol yeah yeah, there’s definitely some punching Prelude 10:07 pm hahaha oh man i just wrote a line Kate 10:07 pm OH DID YOU NOW Prelude 10:07 pm “Not much for sleeping late, then?” she inquires, curious more than she is critical. “Personally, I’ve got a terrible fondness for a good lie-in.”

“I get nervous when I don’t know what time it is,” he admits, a little sheepishly. “I mean—it doesn’t matter. S’just…I dunno, I’m all hungover. And we’re supposed to be outta here by noon. And—and I don’t mean to keep coming back to it, but my entire family, Penelope. Right outside your bedroom door. My grandmother. We weren’t supposed to get her anything, but like…happy birthday, Grandma! I slept with our London Agent.”

“Well, if it helps, it was well after midnight before anything of consequence actually happened.” Penelope tilts her head slightly (adorably), and seems bemused by the concept. “But then, it does beg the question—is that something she would consider a gift?”

Gordon shrugs. “There’s a reason Grandma rhymes with drama.”

On the topic of drama, her answering sigh is exaggerated, but tolerant. “Yes, because you’re an American and you pronounce everything incorrectly.” Kate 10:08 pm lol penny but seriously, i LOVE this and i love the direction it’s going and i love everything i know about the overall shakeup for the family Prelude 10:09 pm oh yes I’m very excited Kate 10:09 pm i can’t describe to you how excited i am for all of this!!! Prelude 10:10 pm hahaha good! motivate me! Kate 10:10 pm how?!?! i’ve done LOTS of screaming!!! lol Prelude 10:11 pm hahaha i mean you are! you are super motivating me Kate 10:11 pm YAYAYAYAY!!! i’m a sucker for relationships and analyzing them throwing wrenches into them lol Prelude 10:11 pm yeah! also Gordon and Grandma and “grandma i fucked up” and just like Kate 10:12 pm OH my gosh yes!!! Prelude 10:12 pm being so upset at how this changes what he thought was goign to play out like, he wanted the chance to fall in love with her i mean, more in love with her but like, to do it Right Kate 10:13 pm right, follow kind of the natural course Prelude 10:13 pm and to have to figure out how to make their relationship work out between their respective jobs because I also think she’s like “I don’t want an abortion” Kate 10:14 pm and the added pressure of distance Prelude 10:14 pm I kind of don’t think that’s in her nature Kate 10:14 pm or how to come together like at least v/k are on the same island Prelude 10:14 pm yeah, exactly Kate 10:14 pm i would assume too, for penny, there’s some sort of expectation of how things should be like, from a social standpoint from a name standpoint Prelude 10:15 pm Yeah, exactly she’s just like staring down the barrel of this scandal and like she’s run into a crumbling south american temple without batting an eye but this scares her Kate 10:16 pm yes that makes perfect sense things are going to change moving forward, forever but there’s really no way of knowing how things will play out Prelude 10:16 pm And their family is so private like so incredibly private she’s lived her whole life in the public eye and he just hasn’t aaaaaah and like man Kate 10:17 pm yesss there are so many factors at play Prelude 10:18 pm he wants so much to do right by her, and like, he already loves her enough to marry her but now he doesn’t know if he should ask or what she’d say if he did or if she wants that Kate 10:18 pm and emotions are so high that i’d think that’d impact a lot like as far as asking for marriage Prelude 10:18 pm also preggo hormones yeah, exactly and like Penny being told that she can’t do that secret side of her job any more she has to be just a socialite Kate 10:19 pm and i’d think maybe this might challenge the nature of their jobs? for anyone involved? Prelude 10:19 pm oh yeah Gordon’s gonna get benched Kate 10:19 pm yeeeep good thing they don’t need him for things like deep sea rig explosions Prelude 10:20 pm wELL not like Penny can do it either Kate 10:20 pm right but that’s what i mean they both do these kinds of things Prelude 10:20 pm exactly Kate 10:20 pm but now adding a child brings in a whole lot more to think about and i am thrilled to see how it plays out!!! Prelude 10:20 pm and now they both have each other on the sidelines Kate 10:20 pm ahhhhhh!!! Prelude 10:20 pm yeah!!! i gotta!!! write it!!! Kate 10:20 pm on the sidelines YES and the virgil/kayo Prelude 10:21 pm “go have a tea party with penny or whatever it is she does” oh yeah Kate 10:21 pm i hope you know you’ve created a monster and i will NEVER let this go even if it takes YEARS AND YEARS Prelude 10:21 pm I think v/k going like “…well should we try and be a thing now? like a real thing? like stuff is changing, should we take that opportunity?” Kate 10:21 pm i’ll always be there, whispering in your ear HAHAHA Prelude 10:21 pm “…what if we don’t work as a thing?” Kate 10:21 pm YES YES and it would be virgil that makes the proposition, yes? Prelude 10:22 pm Oh yeah oh man Grandma taking Gordon aside and being like “the only reason your mother and father got together was because Scott was conceived in a hayloft when your dad was twenty-one, he can get off his high-horse.” “And there are five of you and your parents loved each other more than anything.” Kate 10:22 pm was it intiially like, one of them that said ‘let’s just keep it where it’s at’ or like, very adamantly keep it as fuckbuddies on the dl Prelude 10:22 pm “this doesn’t have to be a disaster” Kate 10:23 pm YES Prelude 10:23 pm I think Kayo is a little bit scared to be caught keeping another secret from the boys. Kate 10:23 pm GRANDMA FOR THE WIN Prelude 10:23 pm and also being like “your dad never meant for IR to be your entire lives” Kate 10:23 pm at least she has virgil in it with her and if anyone is sensible in that family, it’s virgil yes 😔 ir really is literally everything Prelude 10:23 pm “you’re meant to have partners, you’re meant to have your own futures, you’re meant to grow up and learn how to make this a part of your lives and not the totality” And like Kate 10:24 pm impacts ALL areas of their lives Prelude 10:24 pm the core of the reason why any of them keep these secrets at all is because they’re afraid of how it would impact IR and Dad’s legacy Kate 10:24 pm oh my gosh sarah i am fucking here for it and fucking pumped!!! Prelude 10:24 pm and none of them want to be the guy to ruin that. hahahahaha ily kate you complete me Kate 10:24 pm <3 Prelude 10:24 pm i am down to talk about this always Kate 10:24 pm ME FUCKING TOO cuz see, you’re looking at what comes next, and what happens later, not just right now and i fucking APPRECIATE THAT Prelude 10:25 pm oh yeah I am a Big Picture Person and I am very much about the interplay of all these relationships Kate 10:25 pm ugh me too Prelude 10:25 pm and how these different connections form and also like Kate 10:25 pm YES Prelude 10:25 pm unexpected connections Kate 10:25 pm and they’re all getting older Prelude 10:25 pm Like Kate 10:25 pm and things change Prelude 10:25 pm exactly! like it’s so significant that Gordon goes to her intially because he’s like “i need to start getting over you” Prelude 10:26 pm and she’s like “well first you’re gonna be under me for a bit” Kate 10:26 pm and if they’ve found someone that they could make a life with, it’s important that those things happen Kate 10:26 pm b/c of fulfillment and everything Prelude 10:26 pm exactly! and like This is the break scott’s been waiting for, even if he doesn’t realize it And he’s gonna be in this massive funk and he’s gonna be like “I’M GOING OUT FOR SOME AIR” Kate 10:27 pm YES! KEEP GOING KEEP GOING Prelude 10:27 pm and he’s going to fly across the globe to whatever airport Jane is spending the night in and be like Kate 10:27 pm GOOOOO KEEP GOING Prelude 10:27 pm “my fucking little idiot brother knocked up an english socialite” Kate 10:27 pm omg omg Prelude 10:27 pm “let’s get MARRIED.” Kate 10:27 pm i love this Prelude 10:27 pm “that’ll teach him.” Kate 10:27 pm this is literally what i live for omg ahhahahahaha scott Prelude 10:27 pm “he’s not the only stupid impulsive idiot in the family” Kate 10:28 pm hahahaha i love it omg Prelude 10:28 pm And Jane’s gonna be like “slow your roll, babe 😃 " “ily but you’re dumb as hell when you’re mad.” like that Scott’s found someone outside the family who does what Virgil does for him in IR in like an emotional capacity Kate 10:29 pm YESSS omg beautiful i love love love these things Prelude 10:29 pm saaaaame Kate 10:29 pm and like, above all else, these boys DESERVE this Prelude 10:29 pm yeah!!! Kate 10:29 pm they deserve love and something to indulge in and get that ultimate fullillment outside of what they know Prelude 10:30 pm and also I want Penny to go to John first with the news that she’s pregnant because bffs and also I think he’s just who she calls when she’s in trouble Kate 10:30 pm that makes sense and i thought she would cuz bffs hahahaha Prelude 10:30 pm well and also because that was where she went when she first kissed Gordon Kate 10:30 pm right follows patterns Prelude 10:30 pm and i live for callbacks yes also i just like Kate 10:31 pm yes i’m like in my glory right now thinking about it all Prelude 10:32 pm really love that she would trust him and would be correct in trusting him and that he’d be the person to say “well, I will help you handle this however you want to handle this and no one else has to know” “but also please don’t keep this from Gordon, because if he ever finds out any other way he’ll literally die.” “i cannot explain the degree to which this would hurt him and i know you don’t want to hurt him.” Kate 10:32 pm yessss yes Prelude 10:32 pm also parker is going to be Furious Kate 10:33 pm ooh i never really even thought about parker! Prelude 10:33 pm yeah, I keep remembering him at the last second Kate 10:33 pm there are so many players involved and so many lines to follow so many people impacted Prelude 10:33 pm yessssss i live for that shit hwd is like that Kate 10:34 pm like, nothing anyone in this family does only impacts that person Prelude 10:34 pm so complicated so many relationships Kate 10:34 pm or that couple there are repercussions for EVERYTHING any of them do that impact EVERYONE else Prelude 10:34 pm Exactly and deep down at the core of it, it’s just that they all want to protect each other Kate 10:34 pm yes comes from a good place and i’ll never think they’re in the wrong for wanting something more Prelude 10:35 pm and also none of them can BELIEVE that they’ve all been keeping these sorts of secrets with varying degrees of success Kate 10:35 pm i did laundry today and i missed one half of 6 pairs of socks lol Prelude 10:35 pm hahaha Kate 10:35 pm right!?!?!?! Prelude 10:35 pm skillz Kate 10:36 pm like, the kayo/virgil one is kind of mind blowing based on sheer length and thought that goes into it and keeping sage safe Prelude 10:36 pm oh yeah Kate 10:36 pm and secret like shit Prelude 10:36 pm they’re both just like I think they almost get more satisfaction out of the secrecy of it than any other aspect Kate 10:36 pm it’s kind of daunting lol Prelude 10:36 pm Like the sex is fine and great and whatever But what’s almost more fun is that they’ve gotten away with it for so long they’re both kind of competitive and they work really well together as a team and Virgil likes getting one over on his brothers and Kayo feels incomplete if she’s not keeping SOMETHING secret like it probably started up shortly after they found out about her uncle like Kate 10:37 pm oooh Prelude 10:37 pm if that’s the way the context of their relationship changes like that whole sort of “well, at least now it’s easier not to feel like we’re the only family you have” Kate 10:38 pm oooh yes yes yes dude there is so much to explore Prelude 10:38 pm I knoooooow Kate 10:38 pm also like how the hell do they keep quiet? in the literal sense Prelude 10:38 pm it’s a big island Kate 10:38 pm on an island eh true i bet they have A Place Prelude 10:39 pm little huts on the beach TB2 is Pretty Big Kate 10:39 pm but also like, if something really tough happens, do they sometimes just NEED tht touch, that reassurance i think they got the best end of the stick Prelude 10:39 pm (hahaha Gordon: “IN THE CO PILOT’S SEAT. I SIT THERE.”) Kate 10:39 pm they’re both right there HAHAHAHAHAH hahhahaha i love it so much Prelude 10:40 pm “ALAN’S SAT THERE.” “YOU’VE TAINTED OUR BABY BROTHER.” Kate 10:40 pm i don’t understand how my laundry piles up so quickly HAHAHAHAHAHA gordon questioning literally everywhre Prelude 10:41 pm “in MY POOL.” “DRAIN THE POOL.” Kate 10:41 pm hhHAHAHAHA this is my favorite part of that relationship everyone else finding out and gordon with his insults SO ENTERTAINING and i wonder if virgil keeping that sort of secret, in light of gordon seeking him out for a similar type of secret, would lead to some hurt feelings or if he’d be like, i gotchya bro Prelude 10:42 pm oh man i think the thing with Virgil is that like everybody trusts him but he also tells Kayo everything Because couples just do that. Kate 10:42 pm right, which she even told gordon LOL Prelude 10:43 pm exactly and so the thing with Virgil is going to be less that he kept his own secret and more that he didn’t keep anyone else’s. Kate 10:43 pm and like, even if they’re calling it ‘just a thing’ if it’s been a year and a half, like, they’re invested Prelude 10:43 pm oh yeah no, more than either of them realize Kate 10:44 pm that’s the shit i am 100% here for gawd i’m a total slut for that shit Prelude 10:45 pm ehehehe man and like the idea that maybe the secrecy was the only thing that kept them going Kate 10:45 pm also like, friends with benefits is great in theory but i really think it’s more of a short term thing Prelude 10:45 pm I think he’d probably try to argue that they haven’t ever been that. they’re definitely more than friends Kate 10:45 pm and when you don’t see them super often Prelude 10:46 pm like, her being really vulnerable to people knowing something so personal about her Kate 10:46 pm yes yes i think so too that’s a super vulnerable position to be in to even open yourself up to someone that much and put that kind of trust in them Prelude 10:46 pm and him being like “we’re still your family, you can still trust us” “nothing’s going to change about the way they feel about you” and her being like “literally everything will change about the way they feel about me.” Kate 10:47 pm right and more than friends i think has a really high probability of leading to more over time i think it was bound to happen Prelude 10:47 pm yeah, entirely Kate 10:47 pm they’re both right Prelude 10:47 pm I think the best place she could get to by the end of it would be “willing to try with a high hope of success” Kate 10:47 pm but like not in the way they expect, i think Prelude 10:47 pm yeah for sure Kate 10:47 pm i mean, this is just me thinking about it obvs Prelude 10:48 pm no totally, I need thinking about it Kate 10:48 pm also, i had a friends with benefits thing that turned into something more and it was a fucking mess so Prelude 10:48 pm Ooh see like Kate 10:48 pm that kind of impacts, for me, the way i see this playing out Prelude 10:48 pm the thing with me Kate 10:48 pm also Prelude 10:48 pm is that i have been in one (1) relationship Kate 10:48 pm why i am so attached to this idea of v/k and it just happened to be with virgil Prelude 10:48 pm and it has lasted for 14 years and we have a kid Kate 10:48 pm but like, the relationship itself is what got me hooked right, which by the way is fucking amazing!!! Prelude 10:49 pm hahaha thank you we got very lucky Kate 10:49 pm from my experience, and that that friends have had, it’s never easy, and it’s rarely clean Prelude 10:49 pm entirely Kate 10:49 pm even if the agreement is made at the beginning that it’s a ‘whatever will happen’ feelings change damn, memories lol you did get very lucky i think, i am also at the age, the ripe old age of 28, where these things are making a much larger impact on me like, the idea of finding someone or something as the next step 28 is a Year, man Prelude 10:51 pm oh yeah what the hell you’re only 28 you baby you infant Prelude 10:53 pm I’m 29, and I’m going to be 30 so I can say these things Kate 10:53 pm i was about to sya i am pretty sure you are not much older than me lololol Prelude 10:53 pm no, i am not but like I think that’s where Scott’s at I think he had a FWB thing with Jane but it turned into “well, now you’re the person I want to talk to at the end of every day” “even if you’re on the other side of the world” “and even if this is the least physical relationship I’ve ever had” “And usually I rely on that more than I rely on the other thing” Prelude 10:56 pm I think Scott’s been waiting for his moment for like this big reveal and whatever and he thinks that “I have a secret girlfriend and today is our six month anniversary” is going to be a big deal but possibly Gordon swipes that out from under him with “I got Penelope pregnant.” Kate 10:57 pm yes yes, that was one of my first thoughts, actually i feel like, scott’s secret is actually the last on the OH SHIT reveal list like, in order: Prelude 10:58 pm oh yeah Kate 10:58 pm 1: pregnant 2: 1.5 years sneaking around IN THE SAME HOUSE 3: 6 month relationship, not so physical Prelude 10:58 pm but like! the shame of it is, Scott’s so damn proud of himself because I think they started out as like Kate 10:58 pm right!! Prelude 10:59 pm she was just someone he’d bootycall occasionally and then it just got to be more Kate 10:59 pm and it’s good for him to have found that anchor Prelude 10:59 pm and his relationships don’t usually get to the “more” stage I think that was the mistake he made in highschool Kate 10:59 pm it is all very exciting Prelude 10:59 pm like he was seventeen and ready to marry this stupid girl Kate 10:59 pm but even with him, there are more complications Prelude 10:59 pm and her parents were like “NOPE.” Kate 10:59 pm b/c they do not live near each other so as far as more goes that can be hard, i’d imagine! Prelude 10:59 pm yeah, entirely I mean, I did the LDR thing for a few years with the husband Kate 11:00 pm dude and he (scott) totally would have Prelude 11:00 pm entirely he was young and stupid and he thought he was in love it would’ve been a dISASTER though Kate 11:00 pm aww poor scott lol yeah he wouldn’t be where he is! Prelude 11:01 pm no! Kate 11:01 pm and like the dynamics of the entire family would have changed!!! Prelude 11:01 pm and he would’ve had a horrible marriage that lasted a terribly short time and would’ve ended in a messy divorce because he cares way too much like, the way it worked out is still the best way it could’ve worked out but like, he also got a vasectomy as soon as it was reasonably possible (aaaaugh but also Grandma and Gordon sitting side by side at the edge of the pool, and he is just DEVASTATED.) (because Scott came down on him so hard, and even in spite of everything there’s this tiny tiny tiny little part of him that wants to be excited) (that thinks this is new and amazing and wonderful and maybe it means something) (and maybe it could be okay) (but like, Scott pulled the roof down on his head and made him feel like a bad person) (for something that was a mistake/accident) Kate 11:04 pm yesssss yes i see all of that Prelude 11:04 pm (and grandma being like “you know, you remind me very much of your brother and very much of your father right now, because I have been right here with both of them, and Scott was the cause of one of those situations and the result of the other. so don’t worry kiddo. it all works out.”) ('i’m going to have a very very pretty great grandbaby. those creighton-wards have some excellent genes.”) Kate 11:05 pm hahaa yes Prelude 11:05 pm (“and don’t tell your brothers, but you’re the cute one.”) Kate 11:05 pm i do love grandma tracy HA HAHA Prelude 11:05 pm (“best possible baby. let me get my phone, let’s look at your baby pictures.”) Kate 11:06 pm hahaha yes the comedic relief that is very much needed Prelude 11:07 pm For sure Kate 11:07 pm but also proof that things will be okay or that they can be okay that it can work out