#((also forward date this to later in the night))
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thesoulforgeorder · 2 days ago
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hello!!! congrats on the chapter 2 part 1 release!!! you've worked very hard and you should be proud of what you've accomplished!
so far I've only played as the Military!MC and god i could just feel how much their family cherishes them. i specifically play as a Military!MC who's not really entirely sure what she wants and is just trying to fulfill their duty so to speak and thus hasn't really voiced any of their doubts, but that little moment made me think, "you know, i don't think they would immediately turn their backs on you like you fear they would." idk it just made me tear up a lil bit ;3; disappointing them would still make me sad, but i was gladdened to see MC loved by their parents and siblings. i will probably defo come back after playing as an Orphan or Wastelander MC (*w*)
that said, i had to mention something funny. so i often use "Nikola", shortened as "Niko" as my preferred name. i also tend to play as a Chinese MC if the setting is conducive for it because well I'M Chinese xD so it was ESPECIALLY funny for me to meet Nico as Niko. like ok buddy, one of us is gonna have to change--especially if we're dating LOL
even funnier is that you said Nico would be a bard in DND...because I, too, am a bard in DND/BG3. when asked the same question about me, all of my friends took one look at my dopey, loves to sing, "but can i kiss the eldritch abomination?", troublemaker gremlin ass and said "yeah that's a bard." and now i am so curious and excited to see what makes Nico a bard >W<
*insert Spiderman pointing meme*
✓Chinese
✓Shared/homophonous nickname/preferred name
✓Bards
✓Military background
✓Rhyming surnames (Zhu VS Wu)
ONE OF US IS GONNA HAVE TO CHANGE, BUDDY!!! nah jk we can just be Nico^2. or to avoid confusion i'm just gonna give him THE most annoying nicknames. and/or petnames if i romance him LOL please wish me luck that i come out of this IF unscathed for i am just as likely to get eaten by an Exillium as i am to get blasted by Nico for calling him "my dumpling" over the comms.
anyhow. once again, congratulations on chapter 2 part 1!!! i look forward to what else you've got cooking up; that said, please take all the time you need! you've worked very hard!!!!
Thank you so much for the kind words, Anon! All the hard work is worth it when I see how much you and others are enjoying the game.
Military!MC has a lot of interesting family moments throughout the game. The battle of wanting to not disappoint your father, live up to the family legacy, fear of isolation and rivalry and tension with siblings will all come into play in later chapters.
But there will be a lot of sweet moments to soften the angst!
Also that is absolutely hilarious, what a coincidence! Not so long ago another anon said the same thing but in regards to being Astrid! So I see I have anon twins. I can't believe it.
I am still new to coding so I'm not sure how to get characters to recognise players as having the same name as them but when I do, I'm writing that as a scene. Nico would 100% insist that he gets to be nico prime and MC will have to go by a nickname.
Perhaps people will get to see his bard side in part two hehe.
Thank you for the ask and you made my night! I love the Niko and Nico duo. Truly iconic
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vivalas-vega · 23 hours ago
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fine line / part one
look at me trying new things !!! dipping my toe into a new fandom - long time lurker, first time contributor. first four parts are written, I just wanted to get this out and get some feelers and feedback. this is gonna be a big one, i'm working very hard !! please please please, let me know what you think (gonna update the header - just wanted to put something for now lol)
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fine line / mcu x reader / part one
summary: Three kids from Brooklyn. A war that asks too much. And a woman with secrets stitched into every seam.
also - seems obvious bc of the title but fine line by harry styles is the song for this fic, if you like listening while reading that should def be on your playlist (maybe I’ll make a playlist, I’m undecided)
to be tagged in future works, please turn on post notifications for @vegaslibrary
word count: 2.5k
warnings: (not specific to this part, but for the series as a whole. this fic is 18+, you are responsible for your own media consumption). language, angst, drinking, smut, violence, references (and descriptions) of bucky's abuse within hydra, canon-typical situations - this is the mcu y'all, shit will get a little crazy, and a little devastating
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Summer, 1943
“Come on, doll,” Bucky sighed, hand on your waist gripping firm to try and stop you but you just gave him one of those looks that was so classically you. A little annoyance, a little mischief. “A double date with Steve and Bonnie isn’t really what I had in mind for our last night.” 
His hand shifted just slightly, not enough to be considered indecent for how publicly you were situated, but enough towards your hip that you knew what he meant, what he wanted. “There’ll be plenty of time for what you’re suggesting later, Sergeant Barnes,” you replied, the smirk on your lips completely undercutting how innocent you sounded. You pushed him closer to Steve, forcing them to soak up as much conversation as they could before Bucky left at first light tomorrow morning. 
“I don’t see what the problem is. You’re about to be the last eligible man in New York.” Bucky said. “You know there’s three and a half million women here?” He was trying to make him feel hopeful and optimistic about his departure but you and Steve both knew it was fruitless. Bucky was leaving, leaving the two of you behind to go fight the war. It had been just you three since you were children, against the world, and your trio was about to fracture… in ways the boys didn’t even know. 
“I’d settle for just one,” Steve sighed and you flashed him a bright smile, trading places with Bucky and looping your arm through his. 
“Well, then it’s a good thing I’ve taken care of that, isn’t it?” you asked, waving to Bonnie in the distance, waiting for you all just at the entrance.
“What did you tell her about me?” he asked apprehensively.
“Oh, only the good stuff, Steve,” you replied, leaning closer, “and there was a lot to tell.” You made introductions and nudged him forward, trying to push him out of his shell but Steve didn’t do well with letting the rest of the world see who he was. You and Bucky were larger than life, and so was he according to you, but you two seemed to be the only people who knew that.
Howard Stark took the stage—a technology man so ahead of his time you half-believed he was a time traveler. You considered yourself a fairly practical woman, but even you couldn’t help feeling giddy as he spoke of a flying car. You watched in awe as he made it hover above the ground and you turned to face Bucky when you heard him mutter holy cow, with an awe struck smile on your face and delight in your eyes.
He leaned down to press a kiss to your cheek before turning to say something to Steve, who had disappeared at some point in the last five minutes, causing him to look around confused. You gave a sad smile, pointing toward the recruitment center. Bonnie didn’t notice, still marveling at Stark’s other inventions.
“I’m not sure why he wants to face the rejection time and time again,” Bucky said, a mix of disappointment and sympathy in his tone.
“He’s a dedicated man,” you said. “It’s a fine trait in what would make a fine soldier… I just wish they could see that.”
“Well, not everyone can see the world as you do, doll,” he said, pulling the door open for you. “But it’d sure be a good thing if they did.” You frowned slightly when you found Steve, standing in front of a mirror meant to show the person in front of it in a full military uniform… and Steve’s eyes rested where the neck was supposed to be. You thought the world of him, as did Bucky, and you hated how much him and everyone else fixated on his size. You always said a man was measured not by his stature, but by what his heart contained, though Steve could only hear you say it so many times before he stopped believing it.
“Come on,” Bucky said, clapping him on the shoulder and Steve turned, almost a little embarrassed at being caught in front of the display. “You’re kind of missing the point of a double date, we’re taking the girls dancing.”
“You go ahead,” he replied, stepping away from the mirror with his hands in his pockets. “I’ll catch up with you.”
“You’re really going to do this again?” Bucky asked with a disapproving look and you shot him one of your own.
“Well, it’s a fair. I’m gonna try my luck.”
“As who? Steve from Ohio? They’ll catch you… or worse, they’ll actually take you.” You gave Steve a sympathetic look, you’d watched him torture himself with this since the war began, and it broke your heart.
“Look, I know you don’t think I can do this-”
“This isn’t some back alley, Steve. It’s a war,” Bucky shot back and you sighed, realizing Bucky’s little side mission before he met up with you was pulling Steve out of another fight.
“I know it’s a war.”
“Why are you so keen to fight? There’s lots of other important jobs-”
“What do you want me to do? Collect scrap metal in my little red wagon?”
“Yes! Why not?” Bucky was exasperated and you let out another sigh. This is how it always was, it was you in the middle of them constantly… because you could so clearly see both sides. Bucky had points, but so did Steve. 
“I’m not gonna sit in a factory, Bucky. Even Button is doing more than me,” he protested and your eyes darted around… of all the places you didn’t want your laundry aired, a recruitment center was pretty high on that list.
“Steve,” you nearly whispered, a warning. You didn’t need any attention on you or what you did for the war, the less people knew the safer you’d be and the better you could carry out your tasks.
“Sorry,” he muttered, giving you an apologetic look. “Men are laying down their lives, Bucky. I’ve got no right to do any less. It’s not just about me.”
“Right, cause you’ve got nothing to prove,” Bucky shot back and the air grew more tense around you. You wished they wouldn’t fight, not when you had a gut feeling things would never be like this again. Tomorrow Bucky would ship off to war, you’d disappear into your work, and Steve… you didn’t know what Steve would do. This moment could have been the last where you were all still just kids from Brooklyn.
“Come on, aren’t we goin’ dancing?” Bonnie called out, lingering near the entrance.
“Yeah, we are,” Bucky answered, a slight edge to his tone as he tried to pull you away but you planted your feet.
“James,” you said, voice firm. “Not like this.” You gave him a look and he glanced back to Steve, letting out a sigh as he conceded. You were right, as always.
“Promise me you won’t do anything stupid until I get back,” he said, a teasing lilt to his tone as he fixed the distance he’d created just a minute ago.
“How can I?” Steve asked. “You’re taking all the stupid with you.” You cracked a smile, watching Bucky pull him in for a hug, both of them muttering something like punk and jerk. “Be careful,” he added when Bucky pulled away and you could see the longing in his eyes. Longing for his best friend’s safety, longing to go with him.
“Stop by the shop this week, okay?” you asked, leaning down to press a kiss to Steve’s cheek and he nodded half-heartedly. “Don’t disappear on me too, Rogers,” you prodded, keeping your tone light and he gave you his full attention, promising he would come by before you ran to catch up with Bucky. Perhaps it was a low blow pulling on his heartstrings like that, but you felt you had to. You didn’t have much time to make sure he’d be alright without Bucky… without you. You all had jobs to do, and as soon as Bucky shipped out yours would be your focus, you just didn’t know what Steve’s focus would be.
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You and Bucky burst through the door like you were outrunning the end of the world, clumsily making your way inside your small apartment without letting your lips stray from his. Your back hit the wall with a soft thud and he took the opportunity to trail kisses down your neck as his hands roamed everywhere, trying to memorize the feel of you as best he could and you were doing the same. You wanted his touch burned into your skin, the memory lodged in every fiber of your being.
He groaned when you grabbed him by the lapel of his coat, one you’d made for him, and pulled him back to your lips, kissing him with such an intensity that his grip on your waist became bruising. Good, you thought. Give me something to hold onto when you’re gone. The sound that tumbled from your mouth when he hoisted you off the ground to set you on the table shot straight through him and he couldn’t get his hands to move fast enough as they pulled your coat down your arms and began working on the buttons of your dress.
Each inch of skin he exposed made him crumble for you, and his hands landed on either side of your neck to pull you back into a kiss, demanding and hungry… possessive. The slide of his tongue against yours melted you into him, sent tingles to the tips of your toes…. Your fingers were more controlled as they undid his belt, more graceful than his movements had been but the way you tugged it off and threw it on the floor was anything but. You slid your fingers through the loops and pulled him flush against your core, softly biting his bottom lip as he groaned into your mouth.
“God, Button,” he whispered, pushing the hair from your face. “You tryin’ to kill me before I ship out?” 
“Maybe just incapacitate you,” you replied and he shook his head before his lips traced a path along your chest. Your fingers tangled in his hair as he lingered just above your heart and when he lifted his eyes to meet yours they were dark, unreadable.
“You’re gonna vanish, aren’t you?” It was barely above a whisper but it felt loud as it rattled through your ears, heart still thudding rapidly and his hands still holding you like you might vanish right now. You’d grown so still you felt a little like glass beneath his fingers but he pressed on anyway. “I know what you’re planning, you might be able to fool Steve, but not me.”
You didn’t answer, just let your hands slide up to rest on his chest… not quite pushing him away, but not pulling him closer either. “You think I’m stupid?” he asked, catching your chin and pulling your gaze to him… not forceful, but insistent. “You’ve been wrapping things up for weeks, meeting people you won’t name. Soon as I got my papers, you started pulling away. Don’t think I didn’t notice.”
“Bucky-”
“I get it. You want to do more. You’ve always wanted to do more.”
“So please don’t fight me on it,” you replied, soft and sure. “Not tonight.”
He swallowed hard, jaw flexing as he considered his next words. “I’m not trying to stop you, I just-” he exhaled sharply. “I don’t know how to walk out of here tomorrow and feel like it’s really you that’s leaving me.”
“Because it’d be so easy if it were you leaving me?” you asked as you ran your fingers through his hair and he didn’t have an answer, because it wasn’t easy either way. “Forget tomorrow. Just be here. Just… be here.” 
There was nothing else to say, and he didn’t know how to deny you anything, especially not when you pleaded. His eyes scanned your face for a moment and his grip on your face squeezed, just slightly, before he pulled you back into him, kissing you with a new purpose. Now, it wasn’t just him that had to make it back home to you, you had to make it back home to him, too. He didn’t like those odds, both of you being out there.
He pulled you up and helped you pull off the rest of your clothing before pushing you back onto the bed and settling above you, hands taking in every inch of flesh they could. Each movement felt loaded, a whisper of I love you, of I miss you, of please don’t break my heart. Each push of his body into yours filled you like fire and you wished you could stay here like this with him forever… that there wasn’t a war you were both so determined to fight, that you didn’t have to worry about the world outside your apartment door. You wished you lived in a world where the only thing that mattered was you and Bucky in this bed, giving and taking everything you had to offer.
You laid curled against his side, head resting on his chest and listening to the steady thump of a heart that you knew belonged to you. Your fingers moved idly along his skin, as if you were trying to stitch something into him. “I keep thinking about everything we’re never gonna get.”
Bucky was quiet for a long moment. His hand moved slowly along your back, like he could calm the ache out of you one inch at a time. “Like what?”
“Sunday mornings,” you said. “Stupid arguments over curtains. You kissing me in a grocery store, and it not meaning goodbye.”
He smiled, a little sad, “I would kiss you in a grocery store.”
“You’d kiss me anywhere, Sergeant.” you teased, voice thick with affection.
“True,” he chuckled before you fell back into silence. You could feel sleep trying to pull you under, your body exhausted from the weight of his touch, the weight of what it had meant, but you fought it… wanting another minute. Another ten. Another twenty.
“Promise me something,” you said, your voice smaller than you meant it to be.
He looked down at you. “Anything.”
“Leave before I wake up.”
“Button,” he started, already knowing he’d barely be able to stand leaving you as it was.
“Don’t make me watch you walk away,” you murmured. The pain of it lived in every word. “I won’t be able to take it.” He stared up at the ceiling like it might hold a better answer, jaw tense. “Promise me,” you prompted and you saw it break in his eyes. That familiar crack, the one that always came right before he gave in… because it was you. It would always be you. There wasn’t a single thing you could ask of him that he wouldn’t do, even if it broke his own heart.
“Okay,” he whispered. “I promise.”  You stared at him for a long moment, memorizing every sharp line, every soft crease, like your eyes could hold onto him when your arms couldn’t.
You pulled him back into you, losing yourself in him again. There would never be enough kisses. Never enough I love you’s. Never enough of this.
But it had to be.
This one night had to hold all the ones you’d never get.
Time was already moving on without you. But for now, it was just him. Just you. Just this.
And that would have to be enough.
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next part
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jakesimfromstatefarm · 3 months ago
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no doubt ── s. jy
↳ summary ── struggling to balance a world tour, endless responsibilities, and...well, the sting of getting dumped by his girlfriend, jake finds peace & comfort confiding in you—one of his closest friends. what begins as lighthearted late-night phone calls while he's away on tour deepens into something more, quickly pulling you both into uncharted emotional territory. as your connection with jake intensifies, so does your inner turmoil—torn between the comfort of your easy relationship with him and the terrifying possibility of falling for someone you're not even sure you can have in the first place. but jake? jake has absolutely no doubt of what he wants—and spoiler alert? it's you.
↳ pairing ── jake x f!reader, [ft. childhoodbestfriend!jungwon, bestfriends!enha]
↳ genre ── idol!jake, friends to lovers!au || angstttt, fluff, crack
↳ ��ᝰ. 23.7k [never beating the allegations of getting too attached to my works and having too much fun writing i fear...]
↳ contains ── angst! very angsty but only after a lot of fluff...the cheesy cringe type but then it goes downhill real quick...but happy ending i swear!, mentions of insecurities, maybe one or two curse words, fic starts with jake dating og character named jenn, the use of pet names, jungwon practically plays therapist, jake is absolutely whipped for reader but is terrible at communication and a certified idiot . also jungwon is reader's best friend so the beginning sets up the context for that lolz
↳ addie's ✉ .ᐟ ── she's DONEEE [do u hear me crying in the background]...so some backstory lore abt this fic—basically two years ago i had a dream about the ~angsty scene~ of this fic and ever since then, i've had this itch of putting it into words. and when i finally decided to do it, no doubt came out and i thought it was literal fate since the lyrics match the vibe so well...don't tell me it isn't fate guys :') anyways..this is a little different than my typical writing style even though of course i had to include summm crack..but i am still nervous abt how it came out so i really really hope you guys like it :') thank u for all the support and love always <3
↳ update .ᐟ ── check out the sequel series of this fic here!
.・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。..・。.・゜✭・.・
You and Yang Jungwon were literally born to be best friends.  
Like, there was no other option.  
Your mom? Their high school's poster child for academic perfection—top of her class, president of every club imaginable, a certified teacher's pet.  
Jungwon's mom? Their high school's unofficial social chair—life of the party, karaoke queen, probably responsible for half the faculty's headaches. 
Nothing alike. 
So naturally, of course, they were inseparable. By their junior year, they'd already started planning their futures together, including one very specific and totally realistic goal that all teenage girl best friends make when they're young:  
"We should have our first kids around the same time and force them to be best friends!"  
"Oh my gosh, yes," Jungwon's mom agreed enthusiastically. "Like, we'll make them share everything! Matching outfits, playdates, joint birthday parties!"  
But what your moms didn't realize as they were giggling over the playful promise that probably didn't hold any meaning to them at the age of 17? 
The universe was taking notes.  
So fast forward a couple decades later, and there you were, baby best friends from birth, fulfilling the shared dream of your mothers—the true puppeteers in this scenario.  
All your moms had to do was execute their promise as planned, but the rest of it? The rest of it was easy.  
You and Jungwon clicked before you even knew what words were, communicating in a series of shared giggles and unintelligible baby noises. By the time you turned two, you were finishing each other's sentences in your made-up gibberish language, and by preschool, the bond was unshakable. 
You two—just like your moms—were inseparable.  
By high school, everyone knew you were a package deal—where you went, Jungwon followed, and vice versa. So, when he announced your sophomore year that he was leaving to compete on a televised idol survival show, you were, understandably, skeptical.  
"Are you sure it's not a scam?" You had asked, rolling lazily around on his bed while he scrambled around his room, packing his bags.  
"It's not a scam," Jungwon laughed, carefully folding his clothes. 
"Did they ask for your social security number?"  
"Y/N."  
"Exactly. I'm just saying—if you end up on one of those exposé documentaries about fake talent shows, don't say I didn't warn you."  
Despite your teasing, you knew how much this meant to him. Jungwon had been dreaming about being in the music spotlight since he figured out how to work a karaoke machine at the age of six.  
So when he eventually did make his debut with his group, you weren't surprised at all—it was inevitable, written in the stars, just like how your friendship with him was.
What did surprise you, though, was how seamlessly you got roped into his new world.  
Sure, Jungwon's life got infinitely busier overnight, but there is no universe that exists in which he'd forget about you—his non-conjoined twin, ride-or-die, and ultimate life-long nuisance (his words, not yours).  
And so naturally, you became an honorary member of this new life of his. The boys' practice studio might as well be your new home—the endless days camping out on the floor of their dance studio with your head in your textbooks while they drilled their choreography for the hundredth time proved that. Or maybe how you crash on their dorm couch so often that Sunoo coined you your new nickname: their unofficial eighth member.  
Which brings you to now: a marketing major by day, unofficial idol by night, and, as always, a certified magnet to chaos.
Case in point? Whatever madness was happening around you at this exact moment.  
"Okay, but hear me out," Heeseung says, gesturing dramatically with his pizza slice—one of many scattered across the coffee table everyone was sitting around. "Pineapple is the perfect combination of sweet and savory—"  
"It's a crime against humanity," Sunghoon cuts in. 
Tomorrow? The boys leave for their five-month tour.  
Tonight? Tonight is tradition: the pre-tour pizza bash.  
Naturally, it's chaos, as no one has bothered with the last-minute packing they're supposed to be doing.  
Not a single bag is packed.  
"It's fruit on bread," you scrunch your nose, taking a bite of your own normal pepperoni pizza. "This isn't dessert, Hee."  
"Thank you!" Sunghoon reaches across the table to high-five you. 
From the couch behind you, Jake chuckles and nudges your back with his knee, "Big talk coming from someone who claims pickles belong on everything."  
"Uh, because they do," you whip your head around to glare at him. "Pickles are versatile."  
"Versatile my ass," Jungwon mumbles from his spot beside you. "I love you, but you're deranged."  
"Look who's talking, Mr. 'I-put-hot-sauce-on-everything'," you shoot back, eyes narrowing at your best friend. Everyone chuckles from around the table at your dramatic, yet endearing, overreaction. 
"Hot sauce is different," Jay chimes in without even looking up from his phone. "It's an enhancer."  
"Pickles enhance flavor too!"  
"By making everything taste like vinegar," Sunoo deadpans from your other side. "Gross."  
"Whatever," you roll your eyes. "You're all uncultured."  
"And you're a menace," Jake quips from behind you, his voice dripping with amusement. You don't even have to turn around to see the smirk on his face—you can hear it loud and clear. 
"Careful, Sim," you say with a sly glance over your shoulder. "Keep talking, and I'll start adding pickle juice to your coffee."  
The room fills with laughter, but before Jake can fire back, his phone buzzes aggressively against the couch. You watch him glance down at his screen before his playful smile instantly fades.  
"I'll be right back," Jake mutters, getting up and heading towards the kitchen without another word.  
You frown as you watch him disappear around the corner, the sudden shift in his mood gnawing at you, and you can't help but wonder what's gotten under his skin. 
After a few more minutes of heated debates over pizza toppings—and yet another round of everyone ganging up on your weird pickle obsession—you decide it was time for a drink refill.  
Excusing yourself, you step into the kitchen, only to find Jake leaning against the counter, his arms crossed and gaze fixed on the empty wall in front of him. His phone sits abandoned on the counter, screen dark.  
"Jake?" You call out softly, approaching slowly. 
Your voice breaks through his haze, his expression flickering as he registers you standing in the doorway, your brows furrowed in concern.  
"What's going on?" You ask, moving closer to stand in front of him.   
"Nothing," Jake says too quickly, forcing a smile that didn't quite reach his eyes.
You give him a look and he knows that you know he's lying, "Jake.."  
He exhales, his expression crumbling as he runs a hand through his hair, "Just...Jenn called."  
Ah. Of course. Jenn.  
You almost flinch at the sound of the name, the weight it carries instantly souring your stomach. Jake's on-again, off-again girlfriend of two years was a constant source of heartbreak—not just for the poor boy, but for the entire group who helped pick up the pieces of his broken heart after every messy break-up…and even messier make-up.  
"She broke up with me," Jake admits quietly, his voice barely above a whisper. "For real this time. Something about me leaving for tour and how it wasn't going to work out."  
Your heart hurts at the sight of him in front of you—shoulders slumped, hands nervously twisting the hem of his shirt, as if trying to distract himself from the conversation.  
"Oh, Jake...," you murmur, placing a gentle hand on his shoulder as you lean against the counter next to him.  
"I'm fine," he insists, waving it off, but the expression on his face clearly betrays him.  
"No, you're not," you say, trying to catch his eyes. "And that's okay."  
Jake lets out a shaky breath, finally looking up from the ground to look at you, before shrugging, "I don't even know why I’m surprised. We've been...really off for a while now. Like, more than usual. But still, it sucks."  
“Of course, it sucks," you nod, agreeing softly. "You guys were together for a long time. You cared about her."  
For a moment, the two of you sit in a heavy silence with an unspoken understanding, the only sounds coming from the muffled chatter and laughter in the other room. You stay close, letting him process without pushing further.  
Still, you can't entirely suppress the annoying flare of emotions bubbling in your chest—a tangled knot of sympathy and…something else. Relief, maybe? Not that you would ever wish any sort of pain on Jake—but you hate the way Jenn always leaves him like this: drained, doubting himself, and trying to piece together what went wrong, where he went wrong. 
"Come back to the living room," you say finally, nudging his side gently. "Ni-ki is freaking out over which hoodies to pack. And I swear, they're all the same black hoodie."  
Jake lets out a small, tired laugh, "You don't need me for that. He's gonna end up packing all of them, just watch."  
"You don't know that," you tease. "Besides, I need someone's back up to help me convince him he's not actually going through an emo phase."  
His eyes carry a faint smile as he looks at you, the corners of his lips lifting just enough to remind you of the warmth he usually carries.  
"Okay," he says in a whisper, pushing himself off the counter.  
You start towards the doorway, forgetting about your drink refill entirely, but his voice stops you.  
"Y/N?"  
You turn to find him still standing there, his eyes filled with warmth and appreciation.  
"Thanks," he adds, a small smile on his face. It's such a simple statement, but the way he says it—soft, sincere, and maybe just a little desperate—makes something twist in your stomach. "For just...always being here."  
You smile back up at the boy, "Of course, Jake. I'll always be here for you. You know that."  
For a moment, he holds your gaze, as if taking a mental note of something. Then he nods, his shoulders relaxing.
"Okay," he says, exhaling as he gestures toward the doorway. "Let's go.”
You follow behind the boy back to the living room, silently hoping he knows just how much you mean your promise to him.  
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Jake's body is on autopilot at this point.  
Another city, another show, another string of flashing lights and deafening cheers. It's a month into tour, and the endless loop of responsibilities has left him no room to just breathe.  
And he loves this life—he really does. But tonight, for reasons he can't explain, the adrenaline that usually keeps him afloat isn't enough. Pure exhaustion lingers in his bones, heavier than the applause and screams echoing in his memory, and he just can’t seem to shake it. 
When his head finally hits the stiff hotel pillow, Jake exhales with a heavy sigh. The city around him is alive, the neon lights brightly dancing against his windowpane, but he feels none of it. 
Instead? He just feels the weight of homesickness and the ache of being alone. 
Normally, he would push through, shove these thoughts into the back of his mind, call it a night. But tonight, the ache feels different—sharper, louder—and before he knows it, his phone is in his hand before he can talk himself out of it, his thumb hovering over your name on his screen. 
A familiar battle wages in his mind, one he’s been battling more recently ever since tour became a little heavier on him. Slowly, the quiet yearning has been creeping in, and he’s been missing home more and more, craving the feeling of familiarity. But it isn’t just the physical places or the comfort of his regular routine that he craves. 
It’s something else, something harder to name. 
And for some other reason he can’t seem to explain, he thinks it’s you. 
Jake doesn’t know when it started. Maybe it was hearing the sound of your voice through the phone whenever the guys called you to check in every now and then. Or maybe it was the way you would text in their shared group chat, your messages always tinged with humor or a sense of calm that somehow made everything feel a little less overwhelming. 
Whatever it was, it stuck with him. He finds himself craving that unexplainable comfort only you seem to bring. He tells himself it’s nothing special, just the natural pull of familiarity. You’re back at home, the place he misses the most, so obviously, through association, it makes sense. 
It’s logical. Nothing more. 
That’s what he tells himself as his thumb hovers over your name. It’s not about you specifically—it couldn’t be. It’s just the connection to home. The grounding warmth of your voice. The way you somehow make the distance feel a little less suffocating. 
Obviously. Nothing more. 
He presses call.  
Two rings. That's all it takes before your voice cuts through all the static in his head. Groggy, soft, and achingly familiar. Like home.  
"Jake? It's late, is everything okay?"  
Jake glances at the clock. 10:13PM where he is. Much later for you, he imagines. Guilt stirs, but...  
He doesn't want to hang up. 
Hearing your voice feels like the first breath of air after surfacing from deep water. He instantly feels more comfortable despite the heaviness in his chest.
"Hey," he mumbles, his voice quiet. "I'm okay. Just...needed to hear a friendly voice, I guess."  
"Wow, are the boys that bad that you need to call me?" You tease warmly, despite the sleepiness lingering in your words.  
Jake chuckles, the sound low and tired, "Nothing against them, really. It's just...sometimes you need someone who reminds you of home, you know?"  
The other end of the line goes quiet for a moment. He can hear you shuffle, and he braces himself for a teasing comment about him being sappy and sentimental. But instead, your voice softens.  
"Well, I'm glad I could be that for you," your voice telling him you're smiling brightly on the other side of the screen. "Though if I had a private jet, I'd send it right now. Bring you back instantly."  
"A private jet, huh?" Jake's eyes flutter close as he's engulfed into the usual, playful rhythm that's always there between the two of you. "You'd do that for me?"  
"Only if you bring back goodies, preferably snacks," you quip back, and the warmth in his chest grows.  
There's another pause, the kind that feels comfortable rather than awkward. Jake shifts in his spot and before he can stop himself, he blurts out, “How do you do that?”  
“Do what?” 
“Make everything feel...lighter. Like, I can’t explain it, but just hearing you makes me feel like I’m not carrying all this stuff by myself.” 
Your voice softens at his sudden vulnerability. 
“Because you don't have to carry it all on your own, Jake. You know that, right? That’s what friends are for."  
Jake hums in response, a low sound of acknowledgement as he keeps his phone pressed close, your voice instantly soothing the heavy emotions he's been carrying. 
"You sound exhausted," you say after a beat, your tone cautious but filled with genuine care. "How are you holding up? With everything—the tour, the...break-up, just...you?"  
Jake lets out a low groan, his fingers brushing through his hair. "You sound like my mom."  
"Well, someone has to," you tease lightly, a relieved laugh slipping into your voice, as if you'd been afraid you overstepped. "Seriously, Jake. Are you doing okay?"  
Jake hesitates, the question catching him off guard. He hadn't let himself think too much about Jenn or the breakup since leaving for tour a month ago. The boys knew better than to bring it up, and Jake had been grateful for that—for the distraction.  
But now, with you, it feels different. 
Safer, easier. Natural.  
“Honestly? I don’t know,” he sighs, the sound heavy through the phone. “Some days it feels like I’m fine, like I’ve moved on, and other days...it’s like I’m stuck in this loop of ‘what ifs.’ Like, what if I did something different? Or..."  
He trails off to a pause, his throat tight, before he finally admits to you, and himself, "...what if I just wasn't enough?"  
“Jake,” you say gentle but firm, cutting through his spiraling thoughts. “You are enough. You've always been enough. Jenn...she just wasn’t the right person for you. That doesn’t mean you did anything wrong.” 
He swallows hard, your words settling into the cracks he didn't even realize were there. 
"Thanks, Y/N. I mean it. It's just...hard, you know? Haven't really talked about it since it happened. But talking to you helps—a lot."  
“I’m glad." He can hear the quiet sincerity in your words. “And for what it’s worth, I think you’re doing an amazing job. With tour, with...everything. You've got this, Jake. I’m really proud of you.”
Jake lets out a breathy laugh, the warmth in your words settling something in his chest—a knot he didn't even realize was there. 
“You always know what to say, don’t you?” 
“It’s a gift,” you easily reply, and he can hear the grin in your voice, the easy banter making him feel lighter.  
"I missed this," the words tumble out before he can stop himself. Then he quickly adds, as if to explain himself, "It's weird not having you around. The boys are great and all, but you give the best advice. Don't tell them that."  
You giggle on your end, the sound making Jake's lips curve into a small smile and his heart twists.  
In both a comforting and terrifying way. 
"I miss it too," your voice quieter now. "But I'm here. You know that, right? Even if you're on the other side of the world, or if you call me at four in the morning like you're doing right now."  
Jake lets out a chuckle followed by a sleepy groan, "Sorry about that. But...thank you, Y/N. For picking up."  
"Always," you reply, and he hopes you mean it.  
A beat passes. Jake knows he should hang up, that he should let you sleep. He tries to convince himself that you need the sleep more than he needs this call.  
But he can't help himself.  
"You'll yell at me if I don't sleep, won't you?"  
"Absolutely. Go to bed, Jake. Or at least try. Zombie mode doesn't suit you."  
"Fine," he sighs dramatically, but his eyes feel heavier and he knows he's falling asleep, the tension in his body from before easing away. "But only because you scare me sometimes."  
You laugh. "Good. Now get some rest. And call me whenever you need to, okay?"  
"Okay," he mumbles into his phone quietly, his mind already slipping into a deep sleep. 
"Goodnight, Y/N."  
"Goodnight, Jake."  
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"Don't you have a bedtime, Sim Jaeyun?" You tease, answering the call. The clock reads 1:27AM, and you should be asleep—you really should—but you smile anyways when Jake's name appears on your screen.  
"Bedtime? I don't know her," his voice slightly groggy, but as usual, still warm. "Besides I knew you'd be awake. You don't sleep like a normal person either."  
You roll your eyes, knowing fully well he can't see it, "Yeah, well, I don't have to dance around a stage for two hours tomorrow."  
"True, but you do have to deal with my constant calls and keep me entertained. That's way harder."  
"Oh yeah, obviously," you say with mock seriousness. "Being your emotional support human is a full-time job." 
“Emotional support human,” Jake repeats, chuckling softly. “You’re right. I guess I really owe you, huh?”
“Oh, 100%,” you shoot back, a grin in your voice. “I want one of those tour hoodies you guys keep posting with.” 
“Done. What size?” 
"The oversized one."  
Jake pauses. “Let me guess—so you can sleep in it?"  
You hesitate, suddenly sheepish at how he knows you too well, “Hey, it's only cozy if it's oversized!"  
You hear his soft laugh on the other end of the line. 
“Cute. I’ll make sure to steal one for you.” 
You try not to overanalyze the way your stomach flips at the word cute, and the easy way he says it, like it’s the most natural thing in the world.  
You shake the thought off immediately. This wasn't new, after all, Jake's always warm and easy to talk to. But lately—over the past month of phone calls—the way he says certain things, the tone he says them in, and the way they make you feel? It carried a weight you weren't sure how to hold.  
In both a comforting and terrifying way.  
“So, how was your day?” you suddenly bring up, trying to redirect your thoughts. 
"Tiring," Jake sighs, his voice muffled as he shifts around in bed. "And Jungwon keeps beating me at Mario Kart during our break time. My pride is in shambles, Y/N."  
"Let me guess," you smirk, repeating his words from earlier. "He picks Yoshi, and you keep picking Toad because you think he's underrated."  
"Excuse me," Jake scoffs. "Toad is underrated. But, for your information, I choose Toad because your go-to character is Toadette."  
Your heart does that stupid flip again. His words are light—I mean, you guys are talking about Mario Kart for god's sake—but it's stuff like that that keeps you questioning the true meaning behind his words.
You ignore the feeling, instead, a laugh bubbles up in response, an attempt to sound unaffected.
"You're so weird."  
“But you like it,” he quips, voice dipping just slightly, like he’s testing the waters. 
You're caught off guard by the sudden shift in his tone, but you recover just as quickly. 
"Debatable."  
“Liar.”
His tone is teasing, but there's something softer behind it, “You wouldn’t still be on the phone with me if you didn’t like me at least a little.” 
“Maybe I’m just bored,” you shoot back, though your cheeks are burning at his sudden forwardness, questioning if he’s serious or just messing with you. 
You hear him hum in response, "Then I guess I'll have to work harder to keep you interested."  
“Oh yeah? How are you planning to do that?” You try to match his teasing tone, but internally, you feel unsteady under the implication of his words. 
“By being my usual charming self, duh,” he says, his voice dropping into a smooth tone. “And, you know, calling you every night so you don’t forget about me.” 
Your heart squeezes. "You already do that, stupid. You think I'd forget about you?"  
“Never,” Jake's reply is immediate, almost instinctive, leaving no room for doubt. “But just in case…I like hearing your voice. Makes me feel like I’m not a million miles away.” 
His words linger in the space between you, heavier than the playful banter from earlier. You swallow hard, trying your best to keep your voice steady. 
“You’re not a million miles away, Jake.” 
“Feels like it,” he murmurs. You hear a pause in his voice, as if he's thinking hard about his next words. “I miss home. I miss...you." 
Your chest tightens, and your hands grip the sheets beneath you, as if the fabric could somehow ground you. Your heart is doing that thing again—the erratic, terrifying thing that makes you want to believe in something you're not sure is even real.  
And at the same time, your thoughts are scrambling to say something lighthearted before the conversation steers into that dangerous, dangerous territory you were sure you weren't ready for.  
Not yet.  
"Well, you better win at least one round of Mario Kart for me while you're out there," you force a laugh, trying to mask the tremor in your voice.  
Jake laughs, the sound genuine, "I'll try. But if I lose, just know I'm dedicating every race to you."  
"Wow, I'm so honored," you try to deadpan, but he can sense the grin in your voice.  
"You should be," his voice softens again. "Thanks for picking up tonight, by the way. I know it's late."  
He never fails to thank you every night, as if you haven't been picking up every day for the past month and won't be picking up tomorrow, and the next day...and the day after that.  
And, somehow, the same, genuine appreciation makes it so hard for you to ignore that weird, warm, fluttering sensation growing inside you every time you talk to him.  
But, regardless, you always give him the same reply: 
"Always," your voice matching his softness. "Call me whenever, okay?"  
"Don’t say that," Jake warns, the teasing edge creeping back into his tone. "I'll actually do it."  
"Fine," you giggle. "But if you call me at four in the morning again, I'm putting my phone on Do Not Disturb." 
"Deal." He pauses, then adds, "Goodnight, Y/N."  
"Goodnight, Jake."  
As you hang up, you stare at your phone for a moment longer than you should have, your room feeling oddly quiet and too empty without his voice.  
It's just another call, Y/N. Just another call between two friends.  
But deep down, a part of you tells you it isn’t that simple anymore.  
And maybe—just maybe—he knows it too.  
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“Are you busy?” Jake’s voice sounds more tired than usual, heavy with an overwhelming amount of tension. 
“Never too busy for our calls,” you easily reply without hesitation as you lay back in your bed, phone close to your ear. Your voice is light, a stark contrast to the weariness laced in his, and when he doesn’t respond with his typical chuckle, you immediately sense his mood. “Hard day?” 
He exhales slowly, the weary sound answering your question. Today was a lot. Hours of rehearsal followed by a concert, the adrenaline rush of performing, followed by the chaos of having the guys’ hotel information leaked. Crowds of paparazzi and fans swarmed the entrance, the relentless flashes of cameras breaking through whatever little pieces of calm he had left within him. The noise, the pressure, the endless cycle—all spiraled into a mental mess he doesn’t seem to shake. 
The second he settled into his hotel room, all Jake knew was that he needed to talk to you—the one person who could steady his racing thoughts. 
"I just...I didn't think this would get to me, you know? The cameras, the people, the flashes in my face—I'm just—it's like I'm never alone."  
Your heart twists at the vulnerability and rawness in his voice, as if he’s admitting something for the first time—not just to anyone else, but to himself. 
"I—I don't know. Sometimes I wish I could just disappear, just for a little while. Just to breathe, you know?"  
You close your eyes, your grip on the phone unconsciously tightening as if it could anchor him somehow.  
"I know it's not the same," your voice steady, even as you internally ached for him, "but...you can disappear with me, Jake. Even if it's just through the call. No cameras. No noise. Just...you and me."  
He lets out an exhale—shaky, but relieved.  
"You're really good at this. Making me feel like it's all gonna be okay."  
"Because it is going to be okay, Jake," you reply softly. "You're not alone, Jake. Not with me."  
"Yeah," he murmurs, his voice barely above a whisper, and he wishes more than anything else in this moment that he actually was with you. “I know.” 
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"Jake," you groan, sitting cross-legged on your bed, staring at the flustered boy through your laptop screen. "I'm begging you—just wear the black jacket. It's literally impossible to mess up black."  
"But what about the beanie?" He whines as he pops back into view, his face scrunched up in genuine distress. "Do you think I can pull it off, or will I look like I'm trying too hard? Be honest, Y/N."  
What started as a simple fashion-advice-question over the phone turned into a two-hour wardrobe emergency—all because Jake couldn’t figure out what to wear to the airport the next day (because, apparently, airport fits matter—his words, not yours).
"Jake, you could wear a literal trash bag to the airport and fans would still lose their minds," you tease, biting back a laugh. 
He rolls his eyes at you, but the smile tugging at his lips says otherwise.  
"Okay, but seriously, you’re trying too hard. Just go with the jacket, no beanie," you add on, just to end this two-hour long madness.  
"Hmm," Jake plops on his bed and turns towards his phone camera, and you swear you can see the pout forming on his lips. "But I already posted a preview of the jacket last week. Isn't that, like, repetitive?"  
"Jake,” you blink at him, "it's an airport. Not a fashion show."  
He stares at you for a beat, then lets out a dramatic sigh, "Fine! Jacket, no beanie. But if I see even one criticizing comment calling me basic, I'm blaming you."  
You laugh, shaking your head at his ridiculousness, "Deal. Now go to sleep, Sim Jaeyun."  
His grin softens as he adjusts the camera to fully look at you, pout gone, eyes glistening.
"Only because you said so."  
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"Hey," you say softly, answering the call as you snuggle deeper into your blanket, letting it engulf you completely.
The familiar sound of Jake's quiet breathing fills the space between you, and before he even says a word, you already know.  
"Rough day?" You ask gently when he doesn’t say anything after a few seconds. 
"Yeah," he murmurs, his voice quieter than usual, almost drowned out by the low hum of background noise. "I just...I don't really feel like talking right now, if that's okay."  
"Of course," you reply without hesitation, your tone gentle, no questions asked.
On the other end, Jake presses the phone closer to this ear in an attempt to feel closer to you, instantly feeling better from your pure understanding of how he’s feeling, and he thinks—not for the first time—that you might be his favorite person in the world.  
The warm silence engulfs the both of you like a shared blanket, unspoken yet understood. You can hear the faint echoes of his surroundings: the muffled laughter of the boys somewhere nearby, the distant honk of traffic outside his hotel, and then the quiet shuffle of Jake shifting positions in his hotel bed. You catch his breath catching slightly, like he's finally allowing himself to relax—to just be.  
You don't try to fill the silence. You know that he needs this—a moment of peace in the chaos. Instead, you similarly press the phone closer to your ear, as if doing so can somehow bridge the miles between you, hoping he can sense your presence reaching out for him. 
Minutes pass like this, and for a moment, it’s so quiet you begin to wonder if he's falling asleep. But then, a deep exhale breaks the stillness.
"Thank you, Y/N," he says finally, his voice low but steady, carrying a weight of sincerity that makes your heart clench.  
"You don't have to thank me, Jake," your voice matches his softness. "You know that."  
"Still," his voice is low, so quiet, it feels like a secret meant only for you. "I appreciate you. More than you probably know."  
You smile to yourself, your heart aching in the best way possible, and you desperately try your best to ignore it, no matter how much excitement it brought you. 
"Always, Jake." 
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“Tell me something about you that I don’t already know,” you challenge him, your voice carrying that light and endearing tone over the phone that Jake’s come to crave. 
“Hmm,” Jake hums thoughtfully as he lies in his bed, eyes closed, just simply treasuring the small moments, like this one, with you. 
Even though it’s definitely 3AM where he is right now. And he definitely has to be up in a few hours for rehearsal. 
Oh well, completely irrelevant. Talking about everything and anything with you just felt so right. 
“I don’t know,” he eventually exhales, his brain too foggy to think of anything logical right now. “I feel like you know me better than I know myself at this point, Y/N.” 
“You’re so corny it physically hurts, Jake,” you scoff, and Jake swears he can feel your exaggerated eye roll from thousands of miles away. 
“Oh—wait, wait! I have one,” he perks up, his eyes shooting open as he turns towards the phone in excitement. 
“Hit me,” you say, unconsciously smiling at how cute he sounds. 
“I’m allergic to flowers.” 
The line falls silent for a beat before you erupt into a storm of giggles so wild it makes Jake feel sick from how fast the butterflies in his stomach start fluttering. 
“That’s your fun fact? That’s so tragic, Jake,” you gasp through your giggles. “Like, depressingly tragic.” 
“Hey! It’s not that sad, it could be worse,” Jake hopes you can hear his pout over the phone (you can). 
“So you’re telling me you’ve never bought a girl flowers before?” You tease, smiling to yourself as you stare at your ceiling. 
“Guess not,” Jake lets out a laugh, which surprises himself. “Jenn used to always get mad at me for never getting her any, but what am I supposed to do? Show up with a bouquet and an epi-pen? I literally start tearing up whenever I’m around any kind.” 
You lose it all over again, your laughter spilling through Jake’s phone like sunshine, and Jake doesn’t even realize he’s smiling so widely until his cheeks start to ache. 
But what Jake does realize is something unexpected: for the first time in forever, he can talk about Jenn without a single pang of…anything. No weird tension, no lingering sadness—just a casual mention and then…nothing. 
It’s freeing, this feeling of lightness, like an invisible weight he didn’t know he was even carrying has suddenly lifted. He wonders if this is what moving on really feels like, if he’s found his emotional freedom. He wonders when it changed. 
He wonders maybe it’s not when—maybe it’s who.  
And he wonders if it’s you. 
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Today was supposed to be Jake’s day off. The golden ticket to rest, recharge, and not think about anything.
Key term: supposed to be.
Instead, Jake found himself knee-deep in the trenches of emotional warfare—and losing spectacularly.
The morning started innocently enough. No alarm, no schedule, just the soft promise of freedom that was so close within his reach. But by noon, Jake came to a harsh realization.
Freedom was a lie.
Because every step, every sight, every breath, was haunted by one inescapable thought: You.
It started with a boutique. Him and the boys had wandered down a cobblestone street in a city that Jake had already forgotten the name of—city number ten or eleven of tour? He barely knew anymore. But then his gaze caught on a mannequin in the window.
Big mistake.
The outfit on display—similar to his mind—had you written all over it. Immediately, his brain spiraled.
Y/N would love that. She'd probably drag me and all the guys in and force me to hold her bag while she tried it on.
He had to physically stop himself from dragging the group inside to purchase it on the spot.
Next? A coffee shop. And there it was: a poster featuring some limited-edition iced peach latte. Jake froze, staring at it like it held the answers to life itself.
You’d love it. You would order it, (well, you'd make Jake order it, because you hate talking to cashiers), sip it, smile, and probably rant about how overpriced it was—even though Jake would pay for it—yet you’d still finish the entire thing.
And then, you'd steal half of his drink, too. 
Because you always did. 
And Jake always lets you.
The final straw? A cat. Just a random stray, peacefully lounging on a sunny part of sidewalk, looking like it had zero interest in the world around it. And even that didn't escape Jake's you-obsessed filter. Without even thinking, Jake whipped out his phone. 
It was instinctual at this point.
Jake [1:06PM]: (attached - one image) Jake [1:06PM]: thought you'd like this one :)
Because obviously, you needed to see that cat. Immediately.
By the time Jake collapses onto his hotel bed that evening, he feels like he’d run a mental marathon—except instead of a finish line, every road led back to you.
He flops onto his bed, hoping sleep would save him from the storm raging in his brain.
Spoiler alert: it doesn't.
Instead, it leads him to the complete opposite. He stares at your name on his phone, your contact picture, your last messages to him. 
You texted him two hours ago—a sweet goodnight message that ended with your usual, 'Don't hesitate to call if you need me.' 
Casual. Normal.
But it probably didn't mean, 'Hey, please interrupt my sleep from the other side of the world so we can discuss your ongoing emotional crisis over me.'
Don't do it, Jake. The remaining rational brain cells within him beg him to stop. You're being dramatic. She's not the air you need to breathe.
But at the same time, deep down, Jake really thinks you are.
The worst part? You two already had talked on the phone earlier—when Jake had another fashion crisis and couldn't decide what to wear for his day off exploring with the guys. Of course, you laughed at him, teased him, but then helped him pick something out anyways. Typical.
Personally, if it was up to him, he'd spent his whole day off on the phone with you. Talking about everything. Or nothing. Whatever you wanted, Jake would've done it, no hesitation.
Don't do it, Jake, his brain warns him again. What kind of obsessed-lunatic calls the same person twice in one day?
Answer: Jake.
But as Jake lies in his hotel bed, thoughts heavily clouded with the image of you and the sound of your voice, he realizes...this wasn't just a phone call thing. No, this was deeper, worse. And somewhere between staring at the same patch of ceiling and replaying every memory of you on a mental loop, Jake tries to rationalize it.
She’s just a good friend, Jake. A best friend, even! You think about her a lot because she’s cool and funny and…and she has the laugh of a Disney princess...But it’s normal to think about your friends, right? Right??
But the more he tries to downplay it, the clearer it becomes. This was something else.
And then it hits.
Like, really hits.
Oh my god. I like her.
Jake shoots upright, widened eyes filled with horror, as if the realization itself just physically smacked him across the face.
No, no, no, no, no. This can’t be happening.
Jake buries his face in his hands, groaning. But the groan quickly turns into a muffled scream, because the more he thinks about it, the worse it gets.
Because he thinks you're going to be the death of him. He really, really likes you. Not in the vague, 'Oh, she’s cute' way, but in the write-her-name-in-a-heart-and-doodle-little-stars-around-it kind of way. The stare-at-her-texts-like-they’re-poetry kind of way. The imagine-her-laughing-at-your-dad’s-jokes-and-enjoying-your-mom’s-meals-forever kind of way.
And this feeling? It's new. It's terrifying. 
It's exhilarating.
Jake realizes in this very moment that he's never experienced this heart-pounding, face-flushing, breath-taking kind of feeling towards anyone. Sure, his past relationship had been meaningful in its own way, but now Jake is realizing that the foundation of his past relationship was tangled up in obligations and unspoken expectations. A tightrope act of Jake having to be the perfect boyfriend, the perfect idol, the perfect...everything. He never realized how suffocating it was until now—until you. Because this feeling with you?
This was pure. Simple, clear, and undeniable.
Your sheer existence proved that it's possible for someone to understand him better than he understands himself. Your laugh had a way of making everything feel lighter, like the weight of the world had been momentarily suspended. Just one look from you alone somehow always manages to make him feel like he was still worthy even on his worst days.
With you, Jake felt...himself, for once. Not Jake Sim, global popstar. Not Jake Sim, the boyfriend of so-and-so. Just...Jake.
Jake's heart pounds as the realization sinks in. He's now transitioned from screaming into his hands to his poor hotel pillow.
Because as clear and strong as this feeling is, the doubt is just as overwhelming. What if you don't feel the same? What if this ruins everything?
But at the same time...what if you do feel the same way?
What if this is his chance? The butterfly effect that changes everything? What if you're it? You have to be.
And so, like an idiot possessed, Jake's finger is one millimeter away from pressing call on your name again.
Because, obviously, the best way to deal with overwhelming feelings is to confess them from a hotel room five countries away.
Obviously. 
Because what if he didn't call? What if he spent the rest of his night spiraling into an endless pit of unspoken feelings and overthinking, arms flailing as he knows the only way out of the pit is with your help?
What if his brain explodes with the sheer amount of feelings he has for you and he never has the chance to tell you ever again?
He presses call.
The line rings twice before you answer.
"Jake?" Your voice is soft, laced with surprise and just the faintest trace of sleep. "It's late for you, is everything okay?"
Jake's brain short-circuits. What time even is it for him? He has no idea, and frankly, he doesn't care.
"Yeah," he blurts, far too quickly that he winces at himself. He clears his throat before trying again, "I mean, yeah. Everything's fine. I just...couldn't sleep."
"Oh," you hum softly and Jake swears the sound alone could single-handedly resolve global wars.
Yeah, he definitely likes you.
"Is something stressing you out?" The genuine concern in your voice makes his chest tighten.
"No—well, nothing like that," Jake rushes to assure you, sitting up straighter in bed now, as if you could see him. His voice lowers, almost shy, "I just...I was thinking about you."
Silence. Jake's heart pounds so loudly, he's sure you can hear it through the phone.
"About me?" You finally tease, light and playful, but there's something softer underneath. "What did I do to deserve such an honor?"
Jake lets out a nervous, breathy laugh, running a hand through his hair, “You exist. That’s what.”
Another pause. He hears you exhale softly, and the sound alone sends his heart into overdrive.
"That was smooth," your voice is quiet, soft, as if teetering on the line of teasing and nervousness at the same time. "Ten out of ten, Jake."
"I'm serious," Jake tries his best to keep his voice from cracking, the weight of his feelings pressing down on him. "I was lying here, thinking about everything, and I realized something."
"And what's that?"
Jake's throat goes dry. His heart is screaming at him to say it, but his brain begs him to reconsider.
But Jake's sure he's lost all his rational brain cells for sure at this point, so he swallows hard, and braces himself for impact.
"I like you, Y/N."
The words spill out, raw and unpolished, but so utterly true.
“I mean, I really like you," Jake continues, his voice barely above a whisper now. "More than a friend, more than anything.”
The line goes silent, and for a split second, a lifetime of pure awkwardness and torture of not having you in his life anymore flashes in his vision, and he rushes to fill the void.
"I know this is probably the worst timing ever, and probably really scary...and it's okay if you don't feel the same way," his voice definitely cracks this time, laying everything bare, but he doesn't care anymore. "But I had to tell you. I can't pretend around you, not when being around you feels like the only time I'm really me."
Then, you let out a soft exhale—a disbelieving, breathless sound that makes Jake's heart skip a beat.
"Jake..."
"You're...you're everything, Y/N. You make life better just by being in it. And I haven't even seen you in four months, but you're all I think about," Jake lets out a small laugh, swallowing the remainder of all his pride and dignity. "I promise, when I'm back...I'll prove it to you. I'll show you how much you mean to me. Anything it takes. "
For once in his life, Jake feels completely vulnerable—and yet, strangely, it feels right.
Because he means it, every word.
He's never meant anything more.
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The line had gone quiet after Jake’s confession, his words echoing in your ears. 
“I like you, Y/N.” 
No, not like. Really, really like. 
You spent the last few days replaying his words over and over, dissecting every syllable, every tiny inflection in this voice. At first, it didn't even seem real.  
A part of you still thinks it isn't—that this is all a cruel dream and you're going to wake up any second now back in the real world. The one where Jake Sim, the boy who turns heads and steals hearts without even trying, didn't just confess his deepest, most vulnerable feelings for you in a single phone call. 
But no. He said it, alright. Clear as day.  
First, all you felt was pure happiness. Maybe it was hearing his voice everyday, or maybe it was seeing how his face lit up through the screen when you picked up his video calls—but somewhere along the way, you knew it was something deeper. 
Something that made your heart skip when his name lit up your phone, something that left you craving his voice to make your day feel complete. And now? Now the boy who’d effortlessly become your favorite part of every day was telling you you’d done the same for him. 
But then, came the fear. 
Because what if this was just a rebound? What if you were just a soft landing for him, a way to patch up the holes left behind by his past? Here you were, standing at the edge of something terrifyingly real, wondering if you were just a step in his recovery process—a way to fill the cracks, but not the kind of permanence you were beginning to crave. 
You weren’t naive enough to see Jake’s past relationship didn’t still linger in the corners of his mind. You’d seen him struggle with it before, how hard he’d tried to convince himself he was fine. What if you were just the next step in his healing, rather than something real—a Band-Aid for a wound that wasn’t even yours to heal? 
And worse—what if you let it happen? What if you let yourself fall, only to hit the ground at an alarming speed, and...splat. Not just a regular, embarrassing tumble, no. But the kind that leaves you flattened on the pavement like a cartoon character who ignored every warning sign. 
Because that’s exactly what it would feel like, wouldn’t it? Giving it, letting yourself hope—only to crash and burn spectacularly. 
Deep down, you knew you weren’t just risking a little heartache. Because Jake? Jake had quietly claimed a permanent spot in your heart at this point. 
You were risking everything. 
And the worst part? 
You were already halfway there. 
That was the reason why you told him you needed time. The reason why all you could manage to respond was a meek, 'I just...I need to think about this.' And to his credit, Jake hadn't pushed. Of course, not.  
But now, three days later, you were no closer to an answer. If anything, the time apart had made everything worse. 
Because as the days stretched on, with every passing hour, every text you didn’t send and every call you didn’t make, one thing became gut-wrenchingly, undeniably clear: 
You were already his. 
You miss Jake’s voice, his laugh, the way he rambles about the most random things late at night. You miss how, somehow, he made you fall asleep with a smile on your face from the other side of the world. You miss him, that even in his absence, he was still your first thought in your mind when you woke up and the last before you drifted to sleep. 
And no amount of overthinking or second-guessing could change the truth that finally settled in your chest like a secret you weren’t ready to admit to yourself:
You were his. Completely. 
The only question now was whether you’d let yourself believe he was yours too. 
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"Y/N?"  
"Jungwon," you groan helplessly into your phone. "Help me."  
A pause. Then, "Are you sure you meant to call me? It's Jungwon, not Jake," he teases lightly. "I can go get Jake if you meant—" 
"Jungwon!" You cut him off, panicked. "I'm being serious. It's about Jake, dummy."  
"Oh," his tone shifts instantly as he senses the seriousness in your voice. "Did something happen? Because I swear, for the past three days, Jake's been moping around like a kicked puppy, and I was gonna ask you about it because I know you guys have been talking a lot more, but I didn't want to push, and—" 
"That's exactly it, Jungwon!" You wail into your pillow, your voice muffled. Great, now you feel even worse, knowing Jake is moping around, waiting for you.   
"What's exactly it?" Your best friend presses, voice curious. "I need specifics, Y/N."  
You hesitate, the words clinging to the back of your throat like they're too heavy to admit. Finally, you take a deep breath and force them out.  
"Jake told me he likes me, Jungwon. Like really, really likes me. He gave this whole monologue about how I'm all he can think about, and it was so cute, and it made me want to explode from joy and fear all at once, and I don't know what to do!"  
A beat of silence. 
Jungwon sucks in a dramatic breath and then, "Wait, wait, wait. Back up. First of all, this is not news to me."  
You blink, as if he can see your look of shock over the phone, "What?"  
"This was obvious, Y/N. The guy's been smitten with you for months. You guys literally have been talking every day since we left."  
Your jaw drops, "So what? You and I talk every day! How is this any different?"  
Jungwon snorts, "Y/N, we text every day. About minuscule things. Like me reminding you not to forget your keys and you ghosting my last text. But you and Jake? You guys talk for hours—into the illegal hours of the night, mind you. Trust me, I know. Hotel walls are thin."  
You feel your cheeks flushing, "That doesn't mean anything."  
"Doesn't it?" Jungwon's voice is laced with amusement. "When's the last time you called me just to hear my voice?"  
"Jungwon."  
"Exactly."  
You groan again, "But Jungwon, what if…what if he's not over Jenn? What if I'm just a rebound?"  
Jungwon goes quiet for a moment, his tone softening when he finally speaks, “Jake’s not like that, Y/N. You know that. He wouldn’t tell you he likes you unless he meant it.” 
“Yeah, but—” 
“Look," he interrupts. "Jake’s a lot of things—annoyingly loud, for one—but he’s not the kind of guy who’d use someone, especially you, as a rebound. If he said he likes you, he likes you.” 
You bite your lip, his words settling over you like a warm blanket—because you know they're true.  
“And for what it’s worth,” Jungwon continues, “I think you like him too.” 
“I..,” you falter, your heart hammering in your chest. “I do.” 
“Then what are you waiting for?” 
You sigh, a small smile tugging at your lips despite the nerves coiled in your stomach, “I don’t know. I guess I’m scared.” 
“That’s okay,” Jungwon says gently. “But don’t let fear stop you from something that could make you happy. You deserve that, Y/N. And so does Jake.” 
You close your eyes, letting Jungwon's words sink in. Deep down, you know he's right, he always is.  
"Thanks, Jungwon," you say, your voice softer now, tinged with gratitude.  
"Anytime," he replies, and then, with a teasing lilt, "But seriously—you should probably tell him soon. I can't stand watching him mope around like a sad, abandoned puppy. It's seriously tragic, like, to the point where I’m gonna have to start letting him win at Mario Kart."  
A small giggle escapes you, light and genuine for the first time in three days, "I know, I know. Eventually."  
"Y/N," his voice turns playfully stern, like a parent lecturing their toddler. "Eventually isn't a time. Just call him. You've been thinking about him nonstop, haven't you?" 
Unfortunately, Jungwon knows you too well. Your silent response betrays you, and Jungwon lets out a triumphant hum.  
"Thought so. Well, you should go. You have a call to make."  
You sigh, a mix of nerves and a new determination bubbling, "Okay, okay. But if this goes horribly wrong, I'm blaming you."  
"It won't. But deal," his tone is reassuring, confident, like he already knows how this story ends. "You got this, Y/N."  
The call ends, and the quiet still of your room taunts you. For a moment, you sit there, staring at your phone, the little icon of Jake's contact picture—a selfie the two of you took together many years ago—staring back at you like a challenge.  
Your fingers hover. Your heart races, your palms feel clammy, and your stomach twists.  
But then you remember Jungwon's words.  
You deserve this.  
And so does Jake.  
You take a deep breath, then you press down on his name.  
The phone doesn't even reach the second ring before he picks up.  
"Y/N," Jake’s voice is rushed, a little breathless.  
"Hey," you say softly, suddenly unsure where to start. "Um, were you busy?"  
"No, no," he quickly responds. "Not at all. You could call me at 3AM, and I still would’ve picked up."  
"That's unhealthy, you know," your lips twitch as you lay back in your bed, taking a deep inhale. You missed this—you missed him.  
"For you? Worth it," you can hear the smile in his voice, but along with the slight tension just beneath it—the faintest tremor that tells you he's been waiting for this call, maybe agonizing over it just as much as you have.  
You swallow hard, gripping the phone tight, "Jake, about...our last call..."  
"Take your time," he says gently, though you don't miss the way his voice wavers ever so slightly. "I mean it, Y/N. There's no pressure."  
You exhale shakily, closing your eyes, “I’ve been thinking a lot, too. About you. About…us.” 
Jake stays silent, but you could hear the faint sound of him shifting, like he was bracing himself. 
You squeeze your eyes hard, as you let the words finally come out, "I like you too, Jake. A lot. So much, honestly. It's just..."  
"It's just...?" Jake's voice repeats softly, as if that's all he can manage to let out in the midst of his nervousness.  
You hold your breath, scared of what you're about to admit—to Jake and to yourself. 
"It's just...I'm scared," your voice comes out barely above a whisper, "I'm scared that this is too good to be true. That you're saying all of this because...I don't know—you're trying to move on...from the past, or because you're lonely on tour, or—" 
"Y/N,” Jake's voice cuts through firm, but gentle.  
"You're not…a rebound, or a distraction, or anything like that," he starts quietly, each word deliberate. "And this isn't about...Jenn, or me being lonely, or whatever else you think. This is about you."  
Your breath hitches as you take in his words and open your eyes, hoping that staring at the ceiling above you could somehow ground you.  
“You’re the one who makes me laugh when I’ve had the worst day,” Jake continues. “You’re the one I want to talk to, even when I’m running on zero sleep. You’re the one I think about when I’m on stage and wish I could just look into the crowd and see you there. It’s you, Y/N."  
His words are overwhelming, too much, and you're unsure how to even process them. Your throat tightens, and you can feel the subconscious tears prickling at the corners of your eyes without even realizing they were forming.  
"Are you sure, Jake?"  
"More than anything else, Y/N," he says immediately, like the words have been waiting on the tip of his tongue. "And I want to do this right, Y/N. No rushing, no expectations. Just...tell me what you need from me, and I'll do it. Whatever it takes, I'll do it."  
The sincerity in his voice makes your chest ache. You can picture him on the other side of the line, sitting in some unfamiliar hotel room, his brows probably furrowed in that adorable way they always do whenever he tries to find the right words.  
You bite your lip, a small laugh escaping despite the tears sliding down your cheeks, “You’re so cheesy, you know that?” 
Jake lets out a small laugh, immediately easing from the tension that hung in the air.  
"Only for you," he mumbles, his voice soft but steady.  
You sigh, the sound reaching Jake on the other side. There's a pause, a moment of mutual understanding in silence, just listening to the quiet, peaceful hum of each other's breathing.  
“Jake?” You say finally, your voice trembling. 
“Yeah?” 
“I think…” You take a deep breath, and you think your heart is about to break out of your chest. “I think I want to try too.” 
The silence on the other end was electric, and for a moment, you think maybe the call dropped. Then, you hear the unmistakable sound of Jake’s laugh—soft, relieved, and filled with so much warmth that it instantly makes your own heart feel lighter. 
“You're driving me crazy, Y/N,” he says, his voice almost breathless, but tinged with humor.  
“Yeah?” 
“Yeah,” he says, a smile clear in his tone.  
“I hope I am,” you quip, and it makes him chuckle, the sound warm and full of relief. “Guess I’m stuck with your cheesy lines now huh?” 
“Stuck with me?” Jake repeats, pretending to sound offended. “No way. I’m stuck with you, Y/N. And trust me, I’m not going anywhere.” 
His words are so simple, yet so full of promise, and it leaves you feeling a little breathless. 
“Good,” you whisper, your cheeks warm. “Because I don’t want you to.” 
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“Hi Jake,” your voice bright as you immediately pick up his call and see his face appear on the screen, his expression softening when he sees you. 
“Hey pretty,” he replies, without missing a beat, his voice laced with a soft fondness that never fails to make your stomach flip. 
You roll your eyes, failing miserably to hide the blush rising to your cheeks, “Oh, so now I’m pretty, huh?”
Jake smirks at your words, leaning closer to his phone, “Nah, you’ve always been pretty. Just didn’t have the guts to say it to your face before.”  
You groan, dramatically planting your face into your pillow as an attempt to bury the smile on your face, your voice muffled, “You’re gonna be the death of me, Jake.”
“Stop that, don’t hide. Let me see your face,” his tone dips somewhere between playful and pleading, and you give in, lifting your head just enough for him to catch a glimpse of your red cheeks. 
“Cute,” he says with a knowing grin, leaning back against the headboard of his bed. 
“Whatever,” you murmur, but the smile on your face remains. “How was your day today?” 
“Mmm, it was good,” Jake says, running a hand through his messy hair. “Busy, but good. I forget how loud the fans get each time. But it’s nice. Makes it feel worth it, you know?” 
“I’m glad,” your smile grows as you watch him speak, feeling nothing but proud of him. “You deserve all of it, Jake.” 
“Stop,” now he’s groaning, throwing a hand over his face to cover his shy expression. “You’re going to make me blush.” 
“Mm, looks like you already are, Jakey,” you shake your head, laughing softly. 
“Maybe a little,” he admits as he peeks at you through his fingers, his grin boyish and infectious, and you can’t help but laugh again. 
The call falls quiet for a moment, but it’s not awkward—just comfortable, like a shared breath. Jake shifts, turning on his stomach and propping his phone up against some pillows to make sure you can still see him. 
“I miss you,” he says suddenly, and there’s something raw in his tone, something unguarded that catches you off guard. 
Your heart stutters.
“Jake, I literally called you this morning,” you tease, your tone light and sweet. But still, you can’t resist, “I miss you too.”  
“You don’t sound convincing enough,” his eyes narrow at you, the pout forming on his lips quickly turning into a small smirk. “Say it like you mean it.” 
“Fine,” you huff, rolling your eyes. “I miss you so, so much Sim Jaeyun, that it’s physically painful and I might conbust on the spot if I don’t see you soon. Happy?” 
“Very,” he grins into the camera, making your heart beat faster. Ugh. "But please don't combust for me. Who else am I supposed to call every day?"  
"Oh, please, you'd survive," you shoot back, smirking. "I'm sure anyone else would be more than happy to fill the spot."  
Jake clicks his tongue, shaking his head dramatically. "Nope, no one could keep with you, Y/N. You're a handful."  
"Excuse me?" You scoff, mock offense all over your face. "You're calling me a handful? Jake, who's the one that texts me random song lyrics at 3AM and expects me to interpret their deep meaning like it's poetry?"  
"Okay, first of all, they are deep," he argues, his grin widening into something boyish and utterly unfair. "And second of all, I know you secretly love it."  
You let out a laugh as you roll onto your side, propping your phone against the pillow next to you.  
"Maybe I do," you admit with a shrug, trying to sound nonchalant despite the smile on your face. "Or maybe I don't. That's up to you to find out."  
Jake shakes his head, laughing softly, his eyes twinkling as they linger on your face. 
"You really are a handful, Y/N," his voice teases while his eyes remain on you through the screen, as if studying you, and it makes your stomach flip.  
You glance away, suddenly feeling shy again under his unwavering gaze, "Stop looking at me like that."  
"Like what?" His voice is innocent, his eyebrows lifting in feign obliviousness.  
"I don't know—like you're trying to memorize my face or something," you mutter, your cheeks burning.  
"Maybe I am," his voice dips, low and soft. "Honestly wouldn't complain if that's the last thing I ever got to remember."  
His words hit you square in the chest, and despite how ridiculously corny they are, they manage to take your breath away. You don't know if you'll ever get used to this newly discovered side of Jake—the one that speaks so candidly, so sweetly—like you're the only person in his universe.  
But honestly? You love it. You love how he makes you feel, how his words wrap around you perfectly like they were tailor made just for you. But as much as you love it, you fear it too.  
Because the more you fall into this feeling, the more you wonder if there's anything solid beneath it. Despite all the soft words shared and sweet nothings exchanged, at the end of the day, deep down inside you can't help but ask yourself if his words, if he, is even yours to begin with. 
"Jake..."  
"Hmm?" His voice is gentle now, the teasing edge in his voice fading.  
"You really mean it, don't you?" You ask, your voice quieter now, the question laced with your vulnerability. "You're serious about...this? About us?"  
"Of course I am," he answers without hesitation. His soft eyes stay trained on you as he sits up in his spot in bed, as if to show just how serious he is. He lets out an exhale, as if mentally encouraging himself to continue, "I know we're not...whatever this is, officially yet. But I do know that I like what we have."  
He brings his phone closer, a small smile on his face, his expression earnest, "And that I like you. A lot."  
You swallow hard, his words settling in your chest in the best way possible. Because despite everything—the doubts, the undefined boundaries—you can't deny the truth of how you feel.  
"Me too," you admit, your voice steady and honest. "I like what we have too. And I like you."  
You pause, a small smile tugging at the corner of your lips as you feel the remainders of your walls crumbling down, "You make me happy, Jake. Like annoyingly happy."  
"Good. Because you make me happy too," His smile spreads wide, the kind that is contagious and could light up an entire room. "Annoyingly happy, if we're being specific."  
You roll your eyes again, though you're smiling just as much, "We really are insufferable, aren't we?"  
"Oh, completely," Jake nods, his tone playful. He's more relaxed, back to leaning against his headboard as he looks at you with a softened gaze. "We'll figure it out, Y/N. I promise. Whatever this is, or whatever it becomes, I'm not going anywhere. And honestly? I just can't wait to see you. Finally."  
"Me too," you perk up, your eyes sparkling with excitement as you bring your phone closer, "It feels like it's been forever. This tour feels so much longer than the other ones for some reason."  
"It does," Jake hums in agreement, his eyes thoughtful. "But you know what? I think It's because, this time...I actually have something waiting for me. Something—or someone—I want to come home to. And that makes every day feel so much longer."  
You think, at this point, you should check yourself into the emergency department for the sheer amount of times you thought your heart was going to pound out of your body from Jake's words alone.  
“You're ridiculous," you laugh, the sound bubbling out so naturally you couldn't hold it back even if you tried. "It's getting kind of out of hand how cheesy you are, Jake."  
"And yet," he fires back with a smirk, "you love it. Admit it. I've cracked the code."  
"Maybe I do," you tease, repeating your words from earlier as the corners of your mouth tug up into a smile you can't suppress. "But don't let it get to your head."  
"Too late," he grins. "It's already there."  
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Jake [2:15AM] : can I call you?   Y/N [2:16AM]: jake isnt it like 2AM for you?   Jake [2:16AM]: well…yea but I was thinking about you so… 
Your feet are kicking before you even realize, and before you can type up a response, your phone lights up with Jake's name and contact picture. 
“Hi,” you answer softly, trying not to let the giddy smile growing on your face take over. 
“Hey pretty,” he greets, voice warm and easy as he brings a hand through his messy hair. The lights in his room are off, and the dim glow of his phone screen casts a soft light over his features, making him look unfairly good for someone who should be fast asleep.  
“You have two seconds to give me a good reason why you’re here talking to me instead of getting a good night’s rest before your concert tomorrow,” your eyes narrow in mock disapproval as you give him a knowing look.  
Jake laughs lightly, “Hey! Okay, hear me out. I couldn’t sleep, so I did something.”  
You raise an eyebrow, “You did something? That sounds ominous, I’m scared.”  
“Yeah. For you,” he states plainly, leaving you even more confused for a second more before he continues. “I made you a playlist.”  
Your brain stalls at how simple he says it—so casual, as if not packed with so much meaning.  
“A playlist? You—wait, why?”  
Jake shrugs, “I don’t know—I guess I just wanted you to hear what I hear when I think about you. Which, by the way, is a lot. So..”  
You blink at the screen, your mouth slightly agape at the boy who's watching you with that lopsided grin that makes it practically impossible to function. You scramble to collect yourself, but the more you try, the worse it gets, and by now, you think he definitely took some secret class on how-to-make-Y/N-completely-flustered.  
And aced it.  
And of course, he notices—because Jake always notices.  
“You okay there?” His voice breaks you out of your overwhelming thoughts, his teasing tone laced with curiosity.  
“Define okay,” you mutter, rubbing a hand over your face in an attempt to cool down the warmth spreading like wildfire across your cheeks. “Because if it means not feeling like a complete fool over a guy who’s halfway across the world, then no, I’m absolutely not okay.”  
Jake lets out a low laugh, the sound affectionate as he leans closer to the camera, the light reflecting off his shining eyes, “If it helps, you’re not the only one losing your mind here.”  
“Oh yeah?” you arch an eyebrow, “What’s your excuse, Sim?”  
“My excuse?” He tilts his head with a small, exaggerated frown, pretending to think. “Hmm…let’s see…I’m hopelessly into this girl who somehow makes being teased fun, who makes me smile just by hearing my name come out her mouth, and who—“  
“Okay! Stop, stop, enough,” your voice strangled as you try to talk through the fit of giggles you couldn’t hold down. “You’re gonna kill me, Jake. Like, actually. I’m not strong enough for this.”  
Jake laughs at your flustered reaction, holding up a hand of surrender, “Fine, fine. But seriously, look.”  
You hear the sound of faint typing in the background before your phone buzzes with a text containing a link.  
“It’s called Songs That Remind Me of Y/N. Creative, right?”  
You open the link, and your thoughts are dazed at the sight of the endless playlist of songs. Some new to you, some you recognize—all of them feeling like little pieces of Jake's heart he's handing to you.  
"I think it's perfect," you murmur softly, scrolling through the titles, the warmth and appreciation for him now feeling almost too overwhelming.  
"Yeah?" Jake's eyes shine with a mixture of pride and hope as he watches your reaction.  
"Yeah," you repeat, switching your phone screen back to his face and giving him a genuine smile. "I love it. Thank you, Jake."  
Jake hums in response, the look on his eyes gentle as a beat of comfortable silence falls between you two.  
"Well, I should probably sleep for real now, but...listen to it when you miss me, okay? Because chances are, I'm probably doing the same."  
You pause, letting the weight of his words settle over you—vulnerable, yet undoubtedly honest. "Deal. I'll listen to it right now, then."  
"Good," his smile grows, eyes crinkling at the corners. "Because I am too. I miss you, too."  
You both linger for a moment, neither wanting to end the call just yet, simply enjoying each other's pure, raw presence.  
"Sweet dreams, Jake," you finally say, your voice gentle as you slowly let sleep take over. 
"Only if they’re about you," he quips, grinning.  
You roll your eyes, your chest feeling lighter, "Go to bed, Sim."  
"Yes, ma'am," he winks, and with one last fond look, he ends the call, leaving you smiling at your screen like the absolute fool he's turned you into.  
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"I can't believe you're finally coming back tomorrow," you murmur into the phone, your voice soft but buzzing with excitement as you take in the sight of Jake sprawled out on his bed. The dim glow of his phone highlights just enough of his face to remind you how impossibly cute he is—even with the pillow creases on his cheek.  
"I know," Jake sighs dramatically, flopping onto his side. His head sinks into the pillow, and you hear a soft fwump as he shifts to find a comfortable spot. "I just wish I wasn't landing so late. If I could, I'd come see you the second I land. Like, bags in hand, running to your door."  
"You'd probably trip and knock yourself out with your carry-on, Jake," you snort but then smile, the imagine of Jake rushing to get to you playing in your head.  
"First of all, I'm very athletic," Jake raises an eyebrow, pretending to be offended. "Second, that's exactly what would happen, but at least I'd be unconscious on your doorstep, which is still closer to you than I've been in months."  
Your heart does a little flip at the sound of the sincerity in his voice as you try to keep your tone casual, "It's okay, Jake. I'm not going anywhere. We'll see each other the next day? If you're free, maybe."  
Jake's face softens in that stupidly adorable way he always does when he knows you're just trying to play it cool. "Free or not, I'll find a way. Nothing's stopping me from seeing you, Y/N. Not jet lag, not my schedule, not even my manager if he tries to barricade me in the building."  
A giggle escapes you, partly at his sheer determination and partly to cover up the butterflies constantly causing the havoc in your stomach when it comes to him. And Jake, of course, looks all smug, like he knows exactly what he's doing to you. Typical Jake—sweet, determined, and impossibly endearing.  
But as much as his words make your cheeks warm, there's another reason why you're holding back your smile.  
Because, despite what Jake thinks, you're going to see him much sooner than he expects. All thanks to a message you got earlier from the group's manager:  
Y/N! Hope you’re doing well! We all miss you and can’t wait to see you soon! As you know, the boys are returning tomorrow late at night, but the staff and I want to plan a little surprise party at their apartment, they have no idea. The team’s already prepping everything. We’d love for you to come—it wouldn’t be the same without you. 10 PM! See you! 
You're practically vibrating with excitement, each passing minute on the call with Jake making it harder and harder to not just blurt it out and tell him you'll be seeing him in less than 24 hours. And, somehow, hearing his sleepy voice on the other side of the call, completely oblivious, just makes it even harder to contain yourself.  
Jake's brows furrow as he watches you try (and fail) to suppress your grin, "What's up with you? You're smiling so much, and I'm pretty sure I didn't say anything that funny."  
"Me?" You blink innocently, even though your heart skips a beat. But you shrug casually, masking your smile with a feigned yawn. "Nothing's up, you've just been acting too cute tonight. That's all."  
"You're lucky you're cute," Jake narrows his eyes at you, but even you can see through the dim lighting the red creeping across his face, "And that I'm tired. Or else I'd call you out for how you're gaslighting me right now."  
"Gaslighting?!" You sputter out, breaking out into laughter. "How am I gaslighting you for calling you cute?"  
"Because I know you're hiding something—" Jake replies, his pout audible in the way his voice drags. He yawns mid-sentence, the soft sound and the image of his eyes fluttering closed making your heart melt. "—and you're using my sleep-deprived state against me. It's not fair."  
"I'm not hiding anything!" You protest, your face one second away from cracking into a guilty smile. "Go to sleep—you're barely holding it together over there."  
"Like I'd ever fall asleep on you," he mutters, his voice heavy with drowsiness. "You're way too important for that."  
His words hit you like a train, and you have to physically restrain yourself from squealing, burying your face in your pillow before you let out a strangled, "Okay, enough sap for one night, Romeo. Go to bed."  
"Mmhm, fine, fine," Jake hums before he yawns again. "Goodnight, pretty. Dream sweet dreams, okay?"  
You let out a breath, losing the last remaining bits of your composure at this point—but in the best way possible, of course.  
"Goodnight, Jakey. I'll see you soon."  
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The day flies by in a whirlwind of anticipation and sheer chaos, the emotional hurricane brewing up inside you rooting from one source and one source only.  
Because ever since you woke up this morning, every step, every sight, every breath was haunted by one inescapable thought: 
Jake.  
The morning was a blur of pacing around your room like a Sims character who was glitching after being told to "Go Here", overthinking every possible scenario for how tonight—when you finally see Jake in person—could go down.  
Because, really—how exactly do you approach the boy you've been friends with for years, who you've fallen for, in a room filled with people, including yours and his closest friends, all while pretending your heart is trying its hardest to not control, alt, delete itself?  
Not exactly something you can Google.  
Like, do you hug him? Does he hug you? What if he doesn't hug you? (Unacceptable, you decide, before pacing faster.)  
By the time afternoon rolls around, you're about 78% sure you've developed three-and-a-half migraines from the sheer pressure of it all. Not to mention, the borderline illegal amount of caffeine coursing through your veins isn't helping—why did you think drinking four cups of coffee was a good idea? (You didn't. Your brain has officially gone rogue.)  
And now, here you are. The buzzing apartment of the boys is alive with the sounds of laughter, the crinkle of party streamers being hung up, and two staff members arguing about where to put the over-dramatically large "WELCOME HOME" banner. You, along with everyone else, await for the signal, passing time by keeping up small conversation with the friends and staff you've gotten to know over the years—all the while you desperately try to keep your nerves from causing a mental crash out right here and now.  
Eventually, one of the staff gets the alert that the group has landed and is minutes away, the energy immediately shifting, both in the apartment and mentally. You settle in place in the back of the crowd, near the door but not too near the door—because 1) you're 99.99% sure you're not emotionally stable enough to be front and center, and 2) the staff and camera crew are already hogging the entrance as if this was the world's greatest comeback (and spoiler alert—to you, it really is.)  
The lights dim, the chatter fades, and the room hums with anticipation. And meanwhile? Your heart won't. Stop. Pounding.  
Any second now.  
Your nerves bubble up even more than you thought is humanly healthy, and you're not sure if you're about to a) pass out, b) puke, c) or both.
Simultaneously.  
The sound of multiple footsteps echoes faintly in the hallway, followed with muffled voices—one of them the unmistakable sound of Jake's laughter. Your breath catches.  
And then the door swings open.  
"SURPRISE!"  
The boys freeze in the doorway, their suitcases still in hand, the looks of genuine, yet pleasant, confusion plastered on all their faces. Sunghoon's eyes dart to the snacks table, Jay looks like he's deciding whether to laugh or roll his eyes, Sunoo is on the verge of tears, and Jake—Jake looks beautifully, stupidly confused.  
Your eyes immediately find Jake's face, like some natural gravitational pull you can't fight, and suddenly it hits you: he's here. In front of you. No blurry video calls, no glitchy Wi-Fi interruptions—just Jake.  
It feels surreal, like you're living in a sugar-induced dream that you aren't sure of is real yet or not. Last time you saw him in person, he was merely just Jake, one of your best friends, your go-to guy for bad jokes and late-night rants about life. But now? Now he's Jake—the boy who's somehow become the main character of your life (and brain capacity) over the past five months.  
Every memory of your late-night calls, every teasing smile, every time his sweet, groggy voice promised he'd prove himself to you—it all comes rushing back. Like those cheesy montage scenes in a rom-com, except instead of a whimsical romantic song playing in the background, it's the sound of your brain, and heart, screaming WHAT NOW Y/N?! 
But then, finally, his eyes land on you.  
The moment your eyes meet, you think your lungs give up on life. Breathing? Never heard of it. It's like someone hit the pause button on the entire universe, and you're convinced that the only thing to ever exist is Jake looking at you with that soft, unreadable expression.  
But you manage half a second of calm—half a second—before that softness on his face disappears. Just as quickly as it appeared, it's replaced by...something else. Something you can't quite put your finger on. Something you've never thought could exist on his face. A flicker of...conflict? Hesitation? Like he's staring straight at you…but also from miles away at the same time.  
His jaw tightens slightly—so slightly only you would notice with how intently you're looking at him—and for a split second, his hands fidgets at his side before he quickly clasps it over the handle of his suitcase. And right as you process it, right as you're about to convince yourself it's just the million grams of caffeine rushing through your blood that's making you hallucinate and see things— 
He looks away.  
He looks away.  
He looks away. As if you're not even standing there, as if he didn't just short-circuit your entire brain. His attention shifts to the nearest staff member, greeting them with a quick nod, and suddenly he's smiling and laughing at something they're saying like nothing just happened.  
And just like that, the universe hits the play button again, and you're left standing there—staring, blinking, wondering if the last thirty seconds of your life was, indeed, a caffeine-induced hallucination after all. Surely. Right?  
Because Jake definitely didn't avoid you on purpose. Nope. Because that would be insane. Insane, you think to yourself, as the invisible angel on your shoulder continues to whisper into your ear the same sweet words Jake's been telling you the past five months about how much he cares for you, how much he likes you—remember all those times he said it?  
Right. Right. Of course, he does. But still, you stand there frozen, trying to ground yourself, even though your hands start fidgeting at your sides anyway. Great. Fantastic. Cool, cool, cool. This is fine. 
You mentally curse yourself for not being closer to the door after all, and then, you mentally curse every single person in this room for not magically gaining telepathic powers and knowing that you, personally, were trying to have a moment.  
It's fine. You'll find him again. He's just too preoccupied with all the staff members and people to greet. Busy Jake. Social Jake. You're just imagining things. Definitely.  
Trying to distract yourself, you glance around the apartment, everything suddenly feeling suffocating. Maybe a snack. Maybe a drink. Maybe a portal to another dimension. 
Shaking your head out of your spiraling thoughts, you bite the inside of your cheek to ground yourself and turn away from the crowd, quickly settling yourself near the beverage table, pouring yourself a cup of...whatever this is—your mind too cloudy to even bother looking at the sign on the table.
You don't know how much time passes, and frankly, you don't even know if you're fully conscious. Your mind is still living in the past, lingering in that moment where you locked eyes with Jake for the first time in five months, and despite all the overthinking you did this morning of all the possible scenarios that could happen—this was not one of them.  
You're about to pour yourself a second drink just to keep your thoughts busy when you feel a tap on your shoulder.  
"Y/N!"  
Before you can fully turn around, you're engulfed in a warm hug, the familiar scent of Jungwon's cologne immediately grounding you, "Oh god, I missed you. Took me forever to find you with all these people."  
"Jungwon!" You exclaim, a genuine smile lighting up your face despite the emotional tug-of-war in your chest, because, of course, leave it to your best friend to immediately ease your inner panic. You squeeze him back, playfully ruffling his hair as you pull away, "I can't believe they made you grow out your hair. Now you actually look older than me for once."  
He stares at you, blinking. "Y/N. I am older than you."  
"Literally by a week. We all know I'm mentally older," you deadpan, crossing your arms.  
"Okay, I take it back. I didn't miss you after all," he scoffs as you laugh, pulling him into another hug for good measure just to annoy him.  
"I'm so glad you guys are back," you say as Jungwon grabs the drink in your hand and takes a sip himself as he listens to you. "I was dying of boredom without you guys."  
Jungwon raises an eyebrow, "Uh-huh. Definitely didn't sound like boredom all those nights you called Jake at 2AM."  
You freeze. Oh. Great. The one topic you were trying to avoid (how you were going to avoid it—given you're at his literal apartment, with his literal group members, and literal staff members that all work for him—you're not sure. Avoidance was a doomed plan from the start, I fear).  
But before you could answer, Jungwon continues, "So...are you guys, like, a thing now? I know you guys were just talking this whole time, but now that we're back, are you guys gonna be in a relationship and all that stuff? Because if so, I need a heads-up. As much I love you both, I don't know if I can stand you two being all couple-y right in front of me—oh, and also—"  
"Jungwon." 
"—if he hurts you in any way, I swear to god I will not hesitate to—"  
"Jungwon!"  
He stops, wide-eyed, before flashing you a sheepish smile. "Sorry. But seriously, what's happening? You haven't given me any updates!"   
You open your mouth to respond, but the words get caught in your throat. Because if he had asked you yesterday—or even an hour ago—you would've been able to answer confidently. But now? After Jake's apparent Olympic-level avoidance of you? You're not so sure anymore.  
"I...I don't know," you mumble, the words barely audible. Jungwon tilts his head, leaning closer to catch them.  
"What do you mean, you don't know? You guys haven't talked about it?" His brows furrowing as he studies your face, clearly picking up on your hesitation in true best friend fashion.  
"I, uh, I haven't...seen him yet," you admit, hoping the crack in your voice doesn't reveal the real reason you haven't approached the boy in question. "Everyone's busy, and I didn't want to get in the way."  
Jungwon gives you a look like you just said the earth is flat.  
"Get in the way? Y/N, you're insane. This is the guy who's been counting down the days to see you. If anything, everyone else is in his way."  
You give him a helpless shrug, but Jungwon isn't having it. He grabs your shoulders and spins you around, pointing across the room to one of the other snack tables past the crowds of people.
"Look. He's right there. Alone. Perfectly free to talk to you. Go."  
Your eyes land on Jake, back facing you and Jungwon, casually scooping chips into a bowl. You hesitate, scanning his relaxed posture, and the knot in your stomach tightens. Because that's exactly the problem. He's perfectly free. And if he's so excited to see you, how come he hasn't spoken to you yet?  
But before you can voice your doubts, Jungwon gives you a not-so-gentle nudge forward, "Go talk to him before I carry you over there myself."  
And next thing you know, Jake's right there. In front of you. His back is to you still, his eyes scanning the various snacks lined on the table, completely unaware of the full-on mental breakdown occurring just behind him.  
This is your moment, you tell yourself, despite the endless alarms going off in your brain. Every single nerve in your body is on high alert, screaming at you to abort mission, abort! But before you can give in to your panic, your hand is already reaching out, lightly tapping his shoulder.  
"Jake!"  
Jake turns around, and for a moment—a fleeting, fragile moment—you catch it. The way his eyes widen slightly at the sight of you. The way his lips part as if they're about to break into that familiar smile you've missed for months. But just as quickly, similar to earlier, it vanishes, replaced by that flicker of hesitation, and it's enough to make your breath catch.  
"Y/N."  
Your name on his lips used to sound like a warm promise. Now?
Now it feels like an afterthought. 
His voice is calm, steady—too steady, stripped of every ounce of emotion, and not at all like someone who's been counting down the days to see you. He rubs the back of his neck, his gaze flickering to the crowd behind you before reluctantly meeting yours, "It's been so long."  
Your stomach sinks. That's all he had to say? You were completely wrong. You spent precisely 23 minutes of your morning debating if he was even going to give you a hug—but now? Screw the hug, he won't even give you a full sentence. Something's off, and your mind races to figure out what happened, as if you missed a major chapter of your own life.  
Trying to ignore the sharp pang of something lodging itself in your chest, you offer a small smile, hoping to break the tension.  
"Are you...okay? I thought...I don't know, I thought you'd be more excited to see me," the words spill out before you can stop them, and you want to crawl into a self-dug hole from how raw and vulnerable you feel.  
Jake shifts uncomfortably, glancing at the floor, then at you, "No, yeah, of course I am. I'm just...really tired. The flight, you know. And all this," he pauses to gesture at the environment around you two, "it's a lot."  
You stare at him in disbelief, waiting for him to crack—silently begging for some sign of the Jake you thought you knew. But all you get is a shrug.  
A shrug.  
Suddenly, his words feel like a punch to the gut, let alone the way he can't even fully look you in the eyes. In just those few seconds, the invisible angel on your shoulder—whose voice sounded just like Jake's—whispering those promises into your ears suddenly disappeared with no trace in sight, as if it was never there—as if it was never yours—in the first place. Every late-night call, every whispered promise, every shared laugh. 
As if they never belonged to you.  
You swallow hard, trying to keep the growing lump in your throat from choking you, hoping your emotional turmoil isn't blatantly obvious to the boy in front of you.  
"Right," you murmur, nodding as if his excuse makes perfect sense. But it doesn't. "That's...understandable."  
The silence that follows is suffocating. Not the comfortable kind of warm silence you two used to share, but the awkward, unbearable kind that makes you claw at your own skin and makes you wish the ground would open up and swallow you whole right then and there.  
Jake shifts again, and for a moment, his eyes meet yours. There's something there—but before you can grasp it, a voice from the crowd calls his name.  
"I—I should go," he mutters quickly, stepping back. His voice is quiet, his tone almost apologetic, but his words feel like he's hammering the nails to your coffin. "I'll...see you later though, yeah?"  
He doesn't wait for an answer. He's gone before you can say anything, before you can process his words, and for the second time that night, he leaves you standing there with your heart in pieces and your thoughts in chaos.  
For a moment, you swear you're paralyzed. You can't move. Can't breathe. Your vision blurs as every doubt you'd buried for months comes rushing back, screaming in your face louder and crueler than ever. You've never felt smaller, more foolish.  
Your heart beats erratically now, fighting against the realization of the truth settling in your chest—a  heaviness so suffocating it threatens to take you under. The Jake who stood in front of you just now—guarded, distant, a stranger—was so unlike the boy who had made you laugh until your sides ached, who'd stayed up with you on countless late nights, sharing secrets no one else knew.  
The Jake who made promises.  
Your mind spirals. Maybe...maybe those promises were never meant to be kept. Maybe they were just words to fill the time.  
Maybe you were just someone to fill the time.  
Your breath starts to pick up and you're frantically scanning the room, desperate for an escape from your thoughts through any familiar face. Your eyes finally land on Ni-ki and Heeseung casually sitting on one of the couches, their carefree laughter a stark contrast to your inner implosion. You beeline to them, forcing a smile on your face as you plop down beside them.  
"Y/N!" Ni-ki grins the moment he spots you, scooting over to make room. "Where've you been hiding? Thought you ditched us for good."  
"I've been here,“ you give the boys a small smile, praying they don't notice the way your hands tremble as you sit down, “just...mingling."  
Heeseung raises an eyebrow at the faint crack in your voice, but doesn't push further, "Well, we all missed you. Pizza pig-out sesh and games tomorrow? You can tell us everything we've been missing out on."  
You laugh, trying to keep the conversation light, but it comes out shaky, your voice tight under the weight of your hidden emotions, "I think it's you guys who need to catch me up."  
Ni-ki tilts his head, narrowing his eyes at you, "Are you okay? You look...off. What—did someone spill punch on you? Lemme guess, was it Jake?"  
At his name, the knife in your stomach twists even deeper, and you look away, hoping they don't notice the way your face falls.  
But Heeseung notices. Of course. His gaze sharpens, the playful teasing in his expression replaced with a softened concern, "Y/N...what's going on?"  
"I'm fine," you reply a little too quickly, your voice a little too high. You plaster a smile on your face, turning back towards the two boys, concern written all over their faces. "Just tired. Long day."  
Neither of them look convinced, but before Heeseung can say anything else, Ni-ki nudges him and gestures towards something across the room.  
"Hey...isn't that—"  
You follow Ni-ki's gaze, and you immediately wish you didn't. 
Because just like that, your world crumbles.  
There she is—Jenn.  
You're not even wondering when she got here, how she got here, or even why she's here in the first place. No, not even.  
Because all that's occupying your mind right now is the way she's there, perched comfortably on Jake's lap on one of the couches in the distance, her arm draped casually over his shoulder.  
The way she's laughing freely at something he says, her hand lightly brushing against his as if it's second nature, her fingers briefly pushing a strand of hair away from his face.  
The way Jake doesn't even flinch, the way he doesn't pull away.  
The way he smiles at her.  
That same smile—the one you've spent weeks convincing yourself was yours—now feels like a cruel joke.  
And that does it. For the first time that night, despite all you endured, you shatter.  
You force yourself to look away, but it's too late. Your chest hollows out deeper and deeper with every passing second, until all you're left with is a final realization:  
Maybe you never really had him at all. He was never yours in the first place.  
Ni-ki and Heeseung exchange glances before looking at the expression on your face—all the color drained, as if you were merely just a body, paralyzed. Both of them open their mouths, but nothing comes out, clearly unsure of what to say, but you don't give them the chance. You're already standing, grabbing your bag at your side with trembling hands.  
"Y/N, wait—" Heeseung starts as both him and Ni-ki stand up with you, but you shake your head, his voice distant and muffled as if he's speaking to you underwater.  
"I need some air," you mumble, but you're sure neither of them hear you, your voice barely above a whisper.  
Before they can stop you, you're already weaving through the crowd, your vision blurring as you fight the overwhelming urge to break down. You stop at the door, your eyes quickly scanning the cluttered floor for your shoes. For a moment, you think you've made it—escaped the suffocating air and heartbreak clawing at your throat—but a mistake you didn't mean to make stills you.  
You glance over your shoulder, and there he is.  
Jake's eyes meet yours, and the world comes to a stop. His easy smile slips from his face and is immediately replaced by a flicker of panic, his brows drawing together as if he's just realized something, but you don't stick around to analyze it.  
Not when your heart is already in pieces on the floor.  
You quickly look the opposite way, fighting the sting of burning tears threatening to spill over as your fingers fumble desperately with the zipper of your coat when you hear a concerned voice from behind you.  
"Y/N?" Jungwon's familiar voice cuts through your haze, his hand resting lightly on your shoulder. "What—where are you going?"  
"Home," you whisper, avoiding his gaze as you finally manage to get your coat on, turning towards the door.  
Suddenly, Jungwon steps in front of you, a firm frown on his face, "Hey, hey, what's wrong? Talk to me—"  
"Jungwon, I need to go," you look up at him as your voice cracks for the nth time that night, feeling Jake's set of eyes on you still, "Please, Won."  
He hesitates, clearly confused but more worried over anything else, "Okay, but I'm driving you."  
You sigh, shaking your head, "No, it's fine—"  
"I'm driving you," Jungwon repeats, leaving no room for argument as he's already grabbing his coat and walking out the door.  
Not bothering to look behind you to see if Jake's still watching, you follow Jungwon out to the hallway, the chill of the air feeling like a fresh wave of emotions crashing over you all at once: embarrassment, anger, heartbreak.  
You're too caught up in your spinning thoughts to even notice the sound of frantic footsteps behind you until a voice cuts through the silence.  
"Y/N."  
His voice is quiet, almost drowned out by the muffled hum of music and laughter seeping from the party you should've escaped from a long time ago.  
But still, you hear it anyway—because of course you do. Because it's him. And no matter how much you wish you didn't, you'd silence the entire world just to hear that voice.  
And you hate it.  
You hate how your entire body freezes mid-step, you hate how every nerve within you comes alive at the sound of his voice, you hate how your heart stumbles, as if trying to root itself in the pain you've been trying so hard to outrun.  
You turn around slowly, against every ounce of logic telling you to keep walking. And when your eyes land on him—on the raw, desperate, almost broken look on his face—you hate yourself even more.  
Because even now, even after everything, your heart still sinks at the sight. And you hate how you give him the power to break you with just one look.  
“Can we talk?” Jake asks, his voice low and unsteady as he takes a small step towards you.  
From beside you, Jungwon hesitates, his gaze flickering between you and Jake. After a beat, he nods, "I'll get the car. Wait here."  
He spares Jake a final look of warning before nudging you for comfort and stepping into the elevator.  
The elevator doors close, leaving you and Jake alone in the hallway, the air thick with unspoken words and emotions.  
You swallow hard, your throat tight, but you steel yourself, "What do you want, Jake?"  
You shift your weight and instinctively cross your arms, a defensive barrier between you and the boy you spent too long letting into your heart. His eyes meet yours, and for a moment, the vulnerability in them makes your resolve falter. 
He takes a hesitant step towards you before exhaling shakily, running a hand through his hair.  
“I—I messed up tonight. I didn’t mean to...," he trails off, his words fumbling, his eyes searching yours in desperation, his heart breaking at the way your tears are a second away from falling over. 
"...to completely ignore me all night? Make me feel like nothing?" You finish for him, your quiet voice breaking despite your attempt to stay composed.  
"No. God, no. You're not nothing," he says quickly, his voice faltering on the last word. "Y/N, you matter so much to me."  
“Well it definitely didn't feel that way,” your voice is barely audible, but you finally look up at him, the hurt finally bubbling to the surface. “After everything you said—promised, everything we talked about…” 
"I know, I just—" he hesitates, his voice barely above a whisper. He takes a tentative step closer, his movements slow and careful, like he's afraid you'll break if he gets too close. "I was nervous." 
"It’s been so long, and I didn’t know what to say, how to act. I wanted to get it right—to make it perfect—but instead, I just—" he stops, dragging another frustrated hand through his hair. His eyebrows knit together in that familiar way that once made your heart flutter, but now only adds to the ache in your chest. 
You let out a hollow laugh, the bitter sound foreign even to your own ears, “Well, congratulations, Jake. You managed to mess it up anyway.” 
“Please,” he looks devastated, his hands trembling at his sides. “Y/N, please don’t think I don’t care about you. I do. More than you know. I just—I don't know how to do this. I panicked and I didn't mean to hurt you, I swear."  
"Then why was...," you look at him, your eyes still stinging from all the unshed tears as you take a shaky breath, “...why was she all over you tonight? Why didn’t you stop her?” 
He falters, his shoulders slumping under the weight of your question, “It wasn’t what it looked like. I didn’t—I couldn’t—” 
“You couldn’t,” you echo, the words spilling out in a rush now, each one cutting him deeper. “I should've known. Let me guess, she wants to get back together, right?"  
Jake's silence is deafening, and it immediately answers your question. He opens his mouth, but nothing comes out. The way he looks at you—eyes wide and filled with regret, lips trembling as if searching for the right words—confirms everything you were afraid of. 
You squeeze your eyes shut, a shaky breath escaping your lips—a sound caught somewhere between a scoff and a choked sob. No matter how hard you try, the wall holding back your emotions cracks under the weight of it all. The doubts you’ve tried so hard to bury suddenly resurface, crashing over you like waves, each one carrying the sting of every insecurity, every fear you’ve ever had about this moment. Your chest feels tight, your heart splintering under the realization that everything you were afraid of might be true. 
"Jake, I can't do this," you whisper, shaking your head. "I can't be the person you lean on while you try to figure out what you want."  
"No, no—Y/N, I do know what I want," he pleads, his voice cracking as he tries to step closer. "And it’s you. Always been you, Y/N. Everything I said—I meant it."  
His words hang heavy in the air, the faint echo of the party music filtering through the cracks in the door and into the quiet hallway. You look away, refusing to let him see the way your tears finally spill over.  
"You promised," you let out softly and slowly, through your sniffles. “You promised you wouldn't hurt me. You said you'd prove that I could trust you, that I didn't have to be scared. You knew I was worried, Jake. And you...you hurt me anyways."  
"And I swear I meant every word I said. I still do," Jake says, his voice desperate as he shakes his head. He steps even closer, his hand reaching out and brushing against yours, but you pull back before he can close the distance. "You have to believe me. Please, Y/N. You're the only one."  
You shake your head again, the tears now freely rushing down your cheeks despite your best efforts, "I—I don't know if I can believe that anymore, Jake. I want to, I really, really do. But tonight..."  
Jake’s face falls, the weight of your pain crashing into him all at once. His lips tremble as he struggles to hold himself together, his eyes turning glassy themselves. The sight of you—broken, because of him—cuts deeper than he thought was humanly ever possible. His voice is barely above a whisper, raw and pleading, “Y/N, I’m so sorry. I—God, please. Please give me a chance.” 
You look at him—at the boy who became your safe space these past few months—and all you feel is the ache in your heart.  
"I can't do this right now, Jake," you finally let out through your broken voice as you take a step back. "I think I just need space."  
The words hang in the air like a death sentence. His breath hitches as if your words physically hit him in the face, "Y/N..." 
Your phone suddenly buzzes, a text from Jungwon letting you know he's outside. You glance down at it, then back at Jake. For a moment, you hesitate, your heart screaming at you to stay—to give him the chance he's yearning for. But your brain knows better. 
"I have to go," you murmur softly, as you take a final step back, turning away before more tears threaten to spill all over again. You force yourself to keep walking, fighting the overwhelming urge to look back—to let him pull you into his arms, where you wished so desperately you belonged.  
Frozen, Jake watches helplessly as you walk away, his chest tightening with every step you take. Everything feels like it's caving in, regret clawing at him the more he lets you walk further away. He opens his mouth to say something—anything—but the words fail him, silenced by the weight of his own mistakes.  
To Jake, the sounds of the party are now far in the distance, drowned out by the pounding in this ears. Instead, the hallway falls into a haunting silence, broken only by the faint echo of your retreating steps—a cruel reminder of what he's just let slip away.  
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The car ride starts in complete silence, the only sound between you and Jungwon the soft hum of his engine and the faint sound of whatever playlist he was playing in the background. You stare out the window, watching the city lights blur together, your coat clutched tightly under your grasp as if it's the only thing keeping you sane.  
Jungwon glances at you out the corner of his eye, his hands steady on the steering wheel. He doesn't say anything at first, but you know him well enough to sense the storm brewing in his head.  
"Okay," he finally says, as if on cue, breaking the silence. "Spill."  
You don't respond, your eyes still fixed on the surrounding city breezing by you, as if the passing view could somehow erase the memory of him. Your fingers dig further into the fabric of your coat, your knuckles going numb.  
Jungwon gives you a few more moments of silence, but when you don't make any sign of responding, he speaks up again. 
"Y/N," his voice softens, but the edge of his concern cuts through. "Don't do that thing where you shut people out. Especially me, you know I hate that."  
"I'm not—" you start, but your voice wavers, and the lie dies on the tip of your tongue.  
“You are," he exhales sharply from beside you, his grip on the steering wheel tightening. "Look, you don't have to tell me everything, but don't pretend you're fine when you're clearly not."  
The words sit heavy in the air as you swallow hard, your throat burning as you finally whisper, "It's stupid, Jungwon."  
He doesn't take his eyes off the road, but his tone is firm, "I'm sure if it's got you looking like this, it's not stupid."  
You want to argue, to tell him to just let it go, but the hurt pressing down on your chest is too much. The ache in your body threatens to take over again, and you hate it. You hate how the tears form again, how you can still see Jake looking at you like that, like you were breaking right in front of him and he didn't know how to stop it.  
Jungwon waits. He doesn't push, because he knows you. He knows you're just hurting, struggling to grasp your overwhelming emotions, so he gives you the time you need. But his quiet patience is unbearable, like he's peeling back every layer of your resolve just by being there, and eventually, you give in.  
"It's Jake," you finally choke out, the name tumbling from your lips like a curse.  
Jungwon doesn't respond immediately, but you can feel the shift in his demeanor. His jaw tightens, and his fingers flex against the wheel, "I figured as much honestly, after what I saw in the hallway, but what exactly happened, Y/N?"  
You shake your head, your voice shaky, "It doesn't matter. I—I just feel so stupid, Won. Like, how could I think..." 
You trail off, biting the inside of your cheek hard enough to draw blood. Jungwon gives you a softened glance, signaling you to continue whenever you're ready to.  
You take a deep breath before you speak up again, "How could I ever think I was good enough for him, you know?"  
There's a silence that follows after your words and you hear Jungwon take in a deep inhale.  
"This isn't on you, Y/N. This has nothing to do with whether you're enough or not," Jungwon's voice is steady, but there's a firm edge to it now. "Look, I don't want to overstep or anything...and I definitely don't want to vouch for him—especially right now but...are you sure he's not just freaking out?"  
You tilt your head over at the boy next to you, "Freaking out about what?"  
"You," Jungwon says simply like it's the most obvious thing in the world.  
"That doesn't make any sense," you start shaking your head. "Why would he—"  
"Because you're you," Jungwon interrupts, his tone matter-of-fact as he keeps his eyes trained on the road in front of him. "And Jake's a complete idiot, but even idiots get scared when they care about someone as much as he clearly cares about you."  
You blink, Jungwon's words sinking into all the cracks formed within you, "You really think he cares about me that much?"  
“Are you kidding?” Jungwon scoffs, his expression a mix of disbelief and exasperation. “Y/N, the guy looks at you like you hung his moon and stars. Trust me, I’ve seen it.” 
And you don't know what comes over you, but Jungwon's words hit you like a punch to the gut, and suddenly, the tears you've been holding back come rushing forward, hot and relentless. You cover your face with your hands, your body shaking as the sobs you've been swallowing all night finally make their way out.  
Jungwon quickly looks over at you and, without hesitation, glances over his shoulder to pull over to the side of the road, the soft clicking of the hazard lights mixing in with your cries. When he finally puts the car in park, he doesn't say anything and just leans back in his seat, his hand resting lightly on your shoulder—close enough to remind you he's there, but not too much to smother you.  
"I'm sorry," you manage to gasp out between sobs, your hands going up to wipe your face as all the overwhelming emotions finally take over you.  
"Don't," Jungwon says firmly, "Don't apologize for feeling like this."  
You take a shaky breath, trying to pull yourself together as your sobs eventually start to slow down, "I just don't understand. If he cares so much, why does this hurt so bad?"  
"I don't think it's about how much he cares," Jungwon sighs, as if carrying your pain alongside you. "Sometimes...sometimes people care so much that they don't know what to do with it. They panic. They overthink. And they mess up in the worst ways because they don't know how to handle what they're feeling."  
You look up at him, your face still wet with tears, "So you're saying it's an excuse."  
"No," Jungwon replies, quickly shaking his head fervently. "Definitely not an excuse. Jake screwed up, Y/N. Big time. And it's 100% on him to fix that, not you. But—"  
He pauses and thinks for a second, his words deliberate, "—it doesn't mean his feelings aren't real. Or that he doesn't care about you."  
You look away, glancing down at your hands in your lap, fiddling with the hem of your coat as you take in Jungwon's words.  
"It's just feels like...like I'm the only one who got hurt here, Won. Like I'm the only one who..," you trail off, unable to form your thoughts into a coherent sentence, but leave it up to Jungwon to always fully understand you.  
"You're not the only one," he says softly. "He's hurting too, Y/N. Maybe not in the same way, and maybe he doesn't deserve any sympathy, but I can see it. I've seen it. Jake...Jake isn't Jake without you. And honestly? That idiot is probably tearing himself apart right now."  
Your lips part, but the words don't find you. Instead, you let the weight of Jungwon's words sink in, unsure what to do with how true they may be.  
"You don't have to forgive him right now," Jungwon adds after a moment. "Hell, you don't even have to forgive him at all. Honestly, that might satisfy me just a bit. But maybe...maybe you owe it to yourself to hear him out. Not for him, but for you."  
You turn to Jungwon, your lips forming into the smallest pout, "But what if it just makes everything worse?"  
He gives you a faint, grounding smile, equal parts reassuring and honest.  
"Then you walk away knowing you did everything you could—for yourself. And if it does come to that," he shrugs lightly, "we'll figure it out together."  
You're quiet for a long moment, the thought of walking away from Jake and everything he means to you terrifying you…but you know Jungwon's right. You owe yourself the chance to try—even if the unknown outcome fails you.  
With a shaky breath, you nod, brushing away the last of your tears, "Thanks, Jungwon."  
"You're welcome," Jungwon hums in acknowledgement before his lips curve into a small grin, the atmosphere lightening slightly, "but, uh, could you at least use the tissues in the glove compartment before my seats turn into a snot rag?"  
You manage to let out a small scoff of disbelief as you roll your watery eyes, "You're the worst."  
"Nah," Jungwon replies with a cheeky grin as he shifts the car back into drive, but not before he reaches over to ruffle your hair playfully. "C'mon. Let's get you home."  
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The knocking at Jungwon’s door comes at the worst possible moment. 
He’s halfway through organizing his desk—something he only attempts when he’s too frustrated to sit still—and the last thing he expects to see when he swings the door open is Jake, standing there looking like he hasn’t slept a millisecond all night. 
Jungwon makes no sign of saying anything or making a move, just staring at the older boy in question. Jakes shifts uncomfortably, running a hand through his messy hair, not used to seeing Jungwon in this sour, expressionless mood.  
"Hey," Jake finally says, his voice hesitant.  
“What do you want?” Jungwon deadpans, leaning against the doorframe, arms crossed tightly over his chest. He knows he sounds harsh, but, frankly, he doesn’t care.  
Jake falters for a moment, his gaze dropping to the ground, "I...I need your help."  
Jungwon's eyes narrow, "With what, exactly?"  
He knows what, but he's not letting Jake off that easily. Not after last night.  
"With Y/N," your name hangs in the air between them as Jake's voice cracks, and Jungwon clenches his jaw before he lets out a frustrated sigh.  
"I don't think you're in any position to be asking me for help right now."  
"I know," Jake says quickly, his hands raising in surrender. "I know, okay? I screwed up big time. I—God, I don't even know where to start, Jungwon. I just...I don't want to make things worse."  
Jungwon lets out a bitter, humorless laugh, stepping back and motioning his head to let Jake enter his room, "You've already got a good head start on that, I see."  
Jake steps inside, awkwardly hovering near the door as Jungwon moves to sit on the edge of his own bed. He doesn't offer Jake a seat, and Jake doesn't ask for one.  
"She cried, you know," Jungwon says after a few moments of silence, his voice stone cold. "I had to pull over because she couldn't even hold it together long enough for me to get her home. I've known her my entire life, and I don't think I've ever seen her cry that hard, Jake."  
Jake flinches, the words physically hurting him, "I didn't mean to—"  
"Yeah, I know," the younger boy cuts him off, his voice sharp, his anger rising on behalf of you. "You didn't mean to hurt her. But you did. And now you're asking me to help you fix it like it's that easy."  
"It's not easy," Jake mutters quietly, his hands fumbling with the edge of his hoodie. "Nothing about this...none of it is easy. But I know I messed up, and I—I can't just leave things like this, I can't lose her, Jungwon. I care about her too much."  
Jungwon deadpans at his friend, fighting back the urge to scoff in his face, "If you cared about her, you wouldn't have let her walk out of that party looking like her entire world was falling apart."  
Jake looks up, his eyes red-rimmed and filled with something Jungwon can't quite name...desperation, maybe. Or guilt. Or both.  
"I didn't know what to do," Jake finally admits, his voice still barely above a whisper, as if admitting to himself for the first time, too. "I saw her, and she looked so...broken. And I—I panicked, I didn't know what to do, and by the time I realized, she was gone."  
Jungwon leans back, groaning as he runs a hand over his face. The anger bubbling within him hasn't fully faded, but he knows there's something else now—something softer, something that makes it harder to keep his protective guard for you up.  
Because he knows Jake isn't lying.  
"You don't get to half-ass this, Jake," Jungwon finally says after he thinks to himself. "She's not some random girl you're trying to impress, she isn't Jenn. This is Y/N. If you want to fix things, you have to be ready to own up to everything. No excuses, no backing out. She deserves that much."  
Jake nods quickly, his eyes wide and hopeful at Jungwon's slight change in demeanor, “I will. I swear, I will.” 
"And don't think she's going to forgive you right away," Jungwon adds. "She's hurt. You have to give her time. This isn't about what you want—it's about what she needs."  
Jake swallows hard, nodding again, “I just want to talk to her. To explain. To tell her I’m sorry and—”  
His voice cracks, and he looks down, his hands trembling slightly. Jungwon lets out a sigh, his mixed feelings turning more into something closer to pity. Because as much as he wants to stay mad for your sake, he's known Jake long enough to know that he's a good guy—and that his heart is in the right place.  
But even more than that, he knows you. And he knows how much Jake means to you, even if you won't admit it, especially not now more than ever.  
"You're actually an idiot," Jungwon says after a few beats, his voice carrying a lighter tone now. "But for some godforsaken reason, knowing her, I think she might actually miss you."  
Jake looks up from his hands, his eyes searching Jungwon's face for any flicker of doubt, "You really think so?"  
Jungwon shrugs, standing up and moving towards his door, "I think you've got a lot of work to do if you want to earn her trust back. But...I think you still have a chance."  
Jake doesn't say anything as he follows Jungwon to the door, but the look on his face says enough—there's a new slight look of hope. It's small, but he's clutching onto it like it’s his lifeline.  
“You know," Jungwon says when he reaches the doorway. "Y/N’s not the type to let people in easily. She puts up walls—but with you…she let them down. You’re special to her, Jake, even if she doesn’t say it. Don’t throw that away. For her sake, and yours.” 
“I won’t,” Jake promises, his voice steady now. “Thank you, Jungwon.” 
Jungwon nods at the older boy before giving him a faint smile, "And just so you know, I defended you yesterday. So don't prove me wrong or I'm actually going to deck you."  
Jake lets out a weak laugh as he hangs outside Jungwon's door, "Noted. I promise I won't let her down again."  
Jungwon doesn’t respond, just closes the door with a soft click, and hopes—for all their sakes—that Jake means it.  
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Jake [5:12PM]: hi Y/N   Jake [5:12PM]: i know I'm the last person you want to hear from right now. and i don’t blame you at all   Jake [5:13PM]: but i cant just stay silent and let this sit between us, and i value you too much to not respect you needing space and just show up at your door  Jake [5:14PM]: even though it’s killing me to stay away  Jake [5:14PM]: after you left the party last night, i went back inside. i told jenn that whatever we had in the past is exactly that, the past. and i swear to you, Y/N, there’s nothing between us. there hasn’t been for a long time. and it’s my fault for making it seem otherwise.   Jake [5:15PM]: and as for how i acted…i don’t even know where to start. i fucked up extremely. nothing will excuse my actions and i don’t expect you to forgive me. but i need to apologize properly, you deserve that much.   Jake [5:17PM]: please let me see you, Y/N. i don’t deserve it, and i don’t deserve you. but you mean everything to me, and i hate that i hurt you. and i promise, if you let me, i’ll do everything to make it up to you.  
You stare at the phone in your hand, the messages feeling like salt to an open wound. The words on the screen begin to blur together as tears prick your eyes, spilling over before you even realize it. You don't bother wiping them away—the sting in your chest too raw, too heavy. Each word feels like Jake is standing right there in front of you, his voice soft and broken, tangled with regret.  
You tell yourself to stop reading. You've already gone through the same messages at least a hundred times in the past ten minutes, overanalyzing each syllable as if they hold the answers to all of your questions.  
And yet, you can't stop.  
You want to be angry. You are angry. Or, at least, you think. Because beneath the flame of your anger that's already threatening to die out? There's an ache you can't ignore—a small, stubborn part of you that refuses to let go to the sincerity in his words, clinging onto the hope that he's telling you the truth.  
You mean everything to me, and I hate that I hurt you. I promise, if you let me, I'll do everything to make it up to you.  
The ache twists harder, curling into doubt. What if he means it? What if he's telling the truth?  
But of course, the fear rises just as quickly. Because what if he's not? What if you let him back in, and it all falls apart again? What if you let yourself believe in him, giving him the second chance he's asking for, only to have your heart shattered worse than before?  
And then, there's Jungwon's voice, soft but steady, cutting through the chaos brewing in your mind: "Even idiots get scared when they care about someone as much as he clearly cares about you."  
Your breath catches.  
Because that's the worst part. Knowing that maybe—just maybe—Jake really does care. Knowing that maybe he's telling the truth—and you're the one too afraid to take the risk, ready to build up the walls Jake's managed to get through.  
Your phone screen suddenly dims, pulling you out of your thoughts and back into the moment. You blink rapidly, wiping at your face, your mind a mess of emotions you can't untangle or describe.  
Fear. Hope. Doubt. 
And something else—something you're afraid to admit, but you know is unmistakably real.  
And it's stronger than the fear churning in your chest—it's something that's pulling you forward.  
Your heart pounds almost out of your rib cage as you let out a shaky breath, the weight on your shoulders pressing harder and harder with every second you hesitate. The ache doesn't let up, but neither does your hope.  
So you stop thinking altogether, letting your heart take control instead.  
You shut your eyes, as if bracing yourself for a crash, take a deep breath, unlock your phone, and let your fingers fly across the screen, each word feeling like a leap off a cliff.  
You hit send.  
Y/N [5:30PM]: hi jake  Y/N [5:30PM]: you can come over 
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The soft knock at your door startles you, even though you know it’s coming.  
“Y/N?” 
His voice. Jake’s voice.  
Your heart clenches painfully, a conflicting mix of longing and hurt washing over you all at once. It hasn't even been a full day since the party, but the weight of his absence has already hollowed you out, leaving a hole you can't ignore. You know he's the one who caused it—that the cracks in your heart are his doing—but at the same time, the stubborn part of you whispers that he's also the only one who can mend them.  
You make your way to the door, your movements hesitant as you crack it open, peek out, and...there he is.  
"Hi," Jake says softly.  
He's a mess. A beautiful, saddened mess—his hair messy, like he's been running his hands through it all day, his eyes rimmed with the kind of exhaustion that isn't just physical. One hand is buried deep in his jacket, and in the other— 
"Flowers?" You ask, raising a brow in surprise.  
Jake's ears turn red. "Yeah. Uh, I didn't know if you had a favorite, so I got—"  
You open the door wider, revealing the full bouquet—daisies, tulips, roses, all wrapped together in crinkled tissue paper.  
"—a little bit of everything," he finishes awkwardly, his voice trailing off, pausing for a second before holding them out to you with a sheepish smile.  
Your lips twitch subconsciously, despite everything.  
"Jake, you're literally allergic."  
His mouth opens, then closes, the redness from his ears now spreading to his cheeks.  
"Well, yeah, but—," Jake mumbles, shifting on his feet. "—not, like, deadly or anything dramatic like that."  
He pauses, his voice dropping into something softer, more vulnerable, "I just wanted you to have them. That's all."  
You feel your insides tighten, the sincerity in his voice getting to you. For a moment, all you can manage to do is stare at him—at the way his eyes are silently pleading, wide and unsure.  
You hesitate for a second, then step back and open the door wider.  
"Thank you," you say quietly, your fingers brushing against his as you take the bouquet, sending a flicker of warmth through you. "Come in."  
Jake hesitates, his eyes searching yours like he's not sure if he's actually allowed to. When you turn away and walk towards your kitchen, he finally steps inside, kicking off his shoes quickly and hovering by the door like he doesn't know what to expect next.  
You set the flowers down on the counter, adjusting them carefully before turning back to him. He's still standing there, stiff and uncertain, the distance between you feeling larger than ever before.  
"So..." You say, crossing your arms tightly across yourself, shifting your weight as a way to ground yourself—though the lump in your throat makes it feel impossible.  
Jake exhales shakily, his hands fidgeting by his sides and gaze darting to the floor before finally landing on you, "I came to apologize. Properly."  
You blink at him, expression unreadable, "You already said sorry."  
Your voice comes out sharper than intended, surprising even yourself, but the words leave before you can stop them. Jake flinches, just slightly, but he nods, knowing he deserved that. 
"Not like I should have," he says, stepping closer, his voice low and careful, like he's afraid you'll run out of your own apartment. "I know I messed up. I hurt you, and I hate that I did. I hate that I made you feel like you weren't enough or that someone else could ever compare to you, Y/N."  
Your arms tighten around yourself as if the words might knock the breath out of you as look away, unsure if you can meet the rawness in his eyes.  
"Last night," Jake continues, his eyes filling with guilt, "I didn't handle last night right. And not just how I handled Jenn, but I let my own insecurities and stupid fears of being perfect for you get in the way. I let it happen and mess everything up. I let you think that you didn't matter to me, and I will never forgive myself, Y/N."  
His words hang in the air, heavy yet sincere, and for a moment, all you can do is stare at him as you process his words slowly.  
"And I don't expect you to forgive me either, Y/N," Jake's voice wavers before he continues, "but I need you to know that I'm so, so sorry. No excuses. For all of it—for making you feel like anything less than everything, for making you feel like you weren't my first choice. Because you are. You're my only, Y/N." 
His words hit you with a force that crashes over the walls you tried so desperately to build. They're overwhelming yet tender, like rediscovering a piece of yourself you hadn't even realized you lost. And you want to let them comfort you, you do. But the pain from last night lingers deep down, reminding you of why you built those walls in the first place.  
For a moment, the silence stretches on longer than you intend, the weight of his words settling in the air between you. Jake doesn't look away though—his gaze unwavering, vulnerable, and raw.  
As though he's laid himself bare before you, giving you the power to either accept or shatter him completely.  
When you finally find your voice, it trembles despite your best efforts, "Jake...I don't know if I can just forget what happened."  
"I'm not asking you to forget," he says quickly, taking another step closer until there's only a few feet left between you. "I just want the chance to fix us. I can't lose you like this, Y/N."  
Your breath catches at the proximity, his presence pulling you in like gravity. The pain from last night tries to claw its way back into your heart—sharp and bitter—but his warmth reminds you of something else that refuses to be ignored.  
That flicker of hope that's demanding your attention, screaming at you to just let him in—not just for his sake, but for you. 
You take a deep breath, finally meeting his gaze. "Jake, I don't need you to...to be this perfect person. I don't need you to prove anything to me."  
You pause, pushing past the lump in your throat, "Because since the beginning, I always believed you. And...I think I still do. Even after last night, I still believe you, Jake. No matter how hard I try to."  
Jake lets out a breath he thinks he's been holding in for hours, "Really?"  
"Yeah," you nod slowly, as if reassuring yourself as much as him. "But I don't need any of your promises or proof or any of that. I just...I just need you as you."  
His eyes soften at you as he nods so quickly it's almost desperate.   
"And I need you to be honest with me, Jake," you continue before he can speak. "If we do this, I need to know I can trust you. Because I don't know if I can do this...this waiting game anymore."  
"You can," he says immediately, closing the distance between you two, making your breath hitch. You can see the way his hands are trembling, the slight quiver in his lips. "You can trust me. No more hesitation. I'm all in, Y/N. This is it for me, you're it."   
You search his face for any sign of doubt, any speck of hesitation. But all you find is his sincerity—so hopeful and so real—the kind that makes you want to let him in fully and let your walls crumble all over again.  
So you do.  
"Okay," you say softly, almost as if you're testing the word.  
Jake's eyes widen, the relief and hope flooding his features. Slowly, as if asking for permission, he reaches out, his fingers brushing against yours tentatively.  
"Okay?" He whispers, his voice barely audible to you as his eyes flicker between your hands and your face.  
You nod, your own hand turning over so your fingers curl around his in an instinctive gesture that feels so natural it makes you want to scream. The warmth of his touch feels like the first real comfort you've felt in forever, and it's enough to make your resolve slip.  
"But," you add softly, your eyes not leaving the way his hand wraps around yours so perfectly, "this doesn't mean everything's fine. We need to talk. We need to figure out where we stand, and where we go from there."  
Jake nods again, his grip on your hand tightening slightly, "We will. Whatever it takes, Y/N, I'll do it. I need you to know how much you mean to me and I'll never stop trying to show you that."  
You let out a shaky breath as you take in his words, finally looking up from your intertwined hands to meet his eyes, your own slowly filling with the tears you've been holding back. 
"You really hurt me, Jake," you say quietly, your voice breaking from the sheer weight of your vulnerability being laid bare.  
Jake's face crumbles instantly, guilt etched into every line of his expression. Without hesitation, his free hand comes up to gently cup your cheek, his thumb light brushing away the tears that fall, as if he's afraid you might pull away.  
Your eyes flutter closed at the warmth of his hand, and despite the emotions raging inside you, you let yourself lean into him. It feels both reckless, yet inevitable, like free-falling and trusting—knowing—he'll catch you.  
"I know," he whispers, his voice thick with emotion he can't swallow down. "And I'll spend as long as it takes to deserve you, Y/N. I'll never make you feel like that again."  
You nod weakly, and before you can think too much, he wraps his arms around you, pulling you into the safety of his chest, his chin moving to rest on top of your head as his warmth envelops you completely.  
And for the first time in a long time, you let yourself break, burying your face into his chest as the tears flow freely, the weight of everything finally breaking free as you let yourself melt into his tight embrace.  
It's not perfect. It's not a fix-all.  
But as Jake holds you close, whispering quiet reassurances into your hair, you know it's a start.  
And a start is all you need.  
.・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。..・。.・゜✭・.・
epilogue:
“Hi, pretty.”  
“Hi, Jake.”
On the other end of the call, Jake lets out a playful scoff. Even with the slight lag, you can see his lips twitch into that familiar pout—the one that still gives you butterflies, no matter how many times you've see it now, even a year later.
“After all we’ve been through, you still won’t give me a cute pet name?” 
You roll your eyes, biting back a grin, “What do you want me to say? Hi, my handsome, perfect, kindest, funniest, boyfriend in the whole wide world?”  
Jake leans closer to the camera, his expression completely serious as if you should already know his answer, "...Yes." 
Giggles burst out of you, shaking your head at his antics. “You’re too cute to be doing all that, Jake. Pick a struggle.” 
He clutches his chest dramatically, “You know, what? You’re my struggle—I fly across time zones, run on three hours of sleep, and you still won’t give me a crumb of your affection?” 
“You’re exhausting.” 
“And yet…,” Jake trails off with a teasing smirk, his voice dropping into that playful, yet low lilt that still makes your stomach flip to this day. "Here you are, calling me at 1AM in the morning.”  
Your cheeks flush as you glance away from the screen, trying to ignore the way his teasing gaze makes you feel, "Don’t' get confused, it's not like I wanted to or anything. I just figured someone should remind you to go to bed or else you'll look like a zombie tomorrow at the fanmeet."  
Jake laughs softly, the sound grounding you in a certain way only he ever can. "You're so thoughtful, babe. My number-one hater and number-one fan, all at once. I'm so lucky."  
You send him an air kiss, the teasing grin on your face mirrored by the fond one tugging at his lips. He looks at you like he did in that first-ever call way back then—like you're his whole world, and he can't believe you're real.  
"How's the jet lag this time?" You ask, steering the conversation to safer ground.  
"It's not so bad," he shrugs, despite the clear exhaustion in his voice. "At least this trip is only for a few days. Then I can come back to the comfort of our bed."  
You raise an eyebrow, "My bed."  
Jake's eyes narrow, "Our bed. Just admit it—you miss me."  
You pause. "Maybe. Just a little."  
His grin widens, and for a moment, neither of you say anything, the conversation lulling into an easy silence—the kind of warmth that only comes with knowing someone so well.  
Finally, you shift under your blanket, getting comfortable as Jake watches you through this screen, his gaze tender, as though memorizing the curve of your smile, the way you tuck your hair behind your ear.  
"You should sleep," you murmur, holding your phone closer to your face. The glow of your phone reflecting off your soft features sends palpations to Jake's chest so loud he almost doesn't hear your words. 
"Mm, I really should," Jake sighs, though he doesn't move an inch. "I'll talk to you soon, yeah?" 
"Mmhm," you hum, your eyes closing at the softness of his voice.  
“Sleep tight. I love you,” his says, voice soft and deliberate, making sure you feel every word. 
“Goodnight, Jakey,” you tease, letting the smirk creep into your voice, peeking an eye open just to catch his reaction. 
Jake groans dramatically, running a hand down his face, “Y/N…not this again.”  
You giggle, the fondness within you growing tenfold as you take in his face—the slight pout of his lips, his messy hair, his eyes shining with unwavering adoration for you. 
“I said I love youuu,” he whines, dragging out the last word, his lips tugging into the tiniest of smiles, his entire universe reflecting from his eyes.  
Finally, you give in, smiling sweetly.  
“I love you, too, Jake. You already know.”  
And you’ve never meant anything more.  
.・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。..・。.・゜✭・.・
Songs that Remind me of Y/N:
From the first call to forever—you've always been my favorite melody.   Yours, Jake <3
"As I Am" – Justin Bieber (ft. Khalid)  
"Daylight" – Taylor Swift 
"DIE 4 YOU" - Dean 
"Psycho, Pt. 2" – Russ 
"Heaven" – Bazzi 
"Every Kind of Way" – H.E.R. 
"Off My Face" – Justin Bieber 
"Before You" – Benson Boone 
"Sunflower" – Post Malone & Swae Lee 
"Pink + White" – Frank Ocean
"No Doubt" – Enhypen <3 
.・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。..・。.・゜✭・.・
update! if you enjoyed this and want more of no doubt!jake & y/n, check out my sequel series linked here for drabbles of their relationship <3
.・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。..・。.・゜✭・.・
the end! if you made it all the way, this is for you:
⸜(。˃ ᵕ ˂ )⸝♡♡♡♡♡♡
p.s. i wanted to leave the ending kinda up to interpretation—hence the time skip to a year later..but lowkey what if i wrote short drabbles/scenes of things jake does to gain Y/N's trust again, from small to big gestures etc etc..lmk if that's something anyone would wanna see !! (update — linked above now!)
<3, addie
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elstattoo · 6 months ago
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Cold & Wet
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MDNI, MEN DNI
Summary: You go to a lesbian bar with Ellie and find out she has more than a few surprises up her sleeve.
WC: 4.3k
Content: 18+, car sex, fingering(r receiving), head (r receiving), praise,
Author’s Note: Finally finished this!!! I need more Ellie Williams… if possible 🙏
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Normally, you weren’t the type to get love-struck, but Ellie Williams had that effect. Her presence alone stole your breath away. Both anticipation and warmth coursed through you, an unfamiliar mix of emotions for you.
Dina was the one who introduced you and Ellie, that night at the party, and you had no idea how you managed to score a date with her. It was a miracle, indeed, considering how popular Ellie was with girls.
You recalled that night vividly, the way she gulped down her drink, her tongue darting out to lick the remaining drops from her lips. Her eyes met yours, as she mumbled, “Hey… do you want to… I don’t know… hangout sometime?
There was a hint of nervousness in her voice, and a blush was visibly on her cheeks. It was quite endearing how she seemed uncertain as if you would say no to her.
A grin spread across your lips, “Yeah! That sounds.. really nice, Ellie.” You tried to sound as casual as possible, but you knew you failed miserably. The excitement was obvious on your face.
Seeing Ellie, private outside of the party? That would be so much more intimate. You could see the relief on her face as you accepted her invitation, and the small smile that moved across her face made your heart flutter.
“It’s a date then,” Ellie muttered. Your heartbeat sped up, it felt like it was trying to escape your rib cage from how fast it was beating.
Your eyes met, and you shared a silent moment of understanding and connection. You couldn't help but bite your lip as you stared at her, trying to contain your excitement.
You nodded to her words, your voice coming out slightly shaky as you spoke. "I'm looking forward to it," you admitted. There was no hiding the eagerness in your voice, and you knew that she could see right through you.
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So, you find yourself a few nights later, staring at yourself in the mirror for what feels like the hundredth time. You could feel your heart racing as your eyes gazed over your appearance. You look amazing, but the anticipation of this date was gnawing on you, and your hands felt warm and clammy.
This is all you thought about all week and you didn’t want to ruin it, so you took a deep breath. But, it was not used because it felt as if your stomach was twisting into knots.
A sudden ding from your phone brought you out of your thoughts, you saw notifications flash across your screen from none other than Ellie.
Ellie: i’m here
Ellie: where are you? 🙂‍↕️
Ellie: sorry, this apartment complex of urs got me confused asf
The messages made you giggle, so then you took a moment to compose yourself by taking a deep breath and exhaling slowly. Your palms were sweaty as you made your way to meet Ellie at her car. As you approached, exited your house, and made your way towards her car, she waved at you, opening the passenger side door for you.
Your heart swelled at her action, simple, yet so sweet. She gently closed the door before making her way to the driver’s side and getting in.
Ellie’s eyes landed on you, sitting in her car. “I’m really happy I get to take you out, ya know. I’ve wanted to…,” her cheeks heated up and she tucked a piece of hair behind her ear, “to.. take you out for a while.” She finally admitted.
This had you breathless. Ellie Williams wanted to take you out for a while? That means, she has been attracted to you and also had wanted you, like you wanted her for way too long.
Whenever you saw Ellie in passing, you found her so attractive. Her captivating presence and aura made her all the more special, which made you want to explore whatever this was. Your heart leaps in your chest, you don’t want to jump the gun on being hopeful. But you couldn’t help it.
“Well…” you mumbled, “I’m incredibly glad you asked. I’m still shocked you did.”
Ellie’s eyes widened a bit before she chuckled. “Babe.. you really shouldn’t be shocked,” her eyes ranked over your body, taking you in before speaking again, “You’re so hot, nothin’ to worry about.”
Her boldness caught you off guard and you had to hold back a giddy smile from stretching across your face. Fuck. Does she realize the effect she has on you?
Both yours and Ellie’s eyes met quickly, before she started the car. “You’re really… attractive, Ellie. This feels like a dream,” you truly were breathtaking whispering that to her, she couldn’t believe she had you here.
To you, everything truly felt surreal for you in this moment and Ellie felt the same. Both of you were in the same wondrous boat, two lesbians who were shamelessly giddy over one another.
Ellie’s tongue quickly darted over her lips, her focus now on the road and not ogling over you. “Well, this isn’t a dream. I’m glad because I get to take your fine ass out.”
She signaled before, turning the wheel of the car onto the road. Ellie earned a giggle out of you at her words, the sound causing her eyes to side glance to you, again. She couldn’t help herself.
You thought you were dreaming? Ellie felt as though she was, hearing that sound come out of your mouth.
With one hand gripping the wheel, her right arm passed over to grip your thigh, the tattoo flexing on her forearm. She clutched the fat of your thigh. Boldness growing over her, she smirked to herself when she heard your breath hitch at the feeling.
This was the first time Ellie had ever touched you that way, and it sent you wanting more than her just touching your plush, thick thighs. You shivered the creeping thoughts away, focusing on the moment.
Your hand grazed over hers that lay on your thigh, you ran your fingers slightly over her hand. Ellie felt like fireworks exploded feeling your smaller fingers against hers.
She smiled to herself, her grip on your thigh lessening and she just laid it there. You glanced down, intertwining her now empty hand with yours.
Ellie felt the warmth of your hand around hers, her hand held yours together more closely. Feeling her tighten her hand slightly, you looked down at your interlocked hands and felt your heart tug. Your whole body felt so warm, even from just holding her hand. It was electrical.
You’ve had girlfriends, flings, and more in the past, but none of them made you feel the way Ellie had. She even had you that way just from handholding.
The rest of the ride to the bar was quiet, the radio quietly buzzing tunes while you held Ellie’s hand the rest of the way. She gave you soft squeezes now and then until the car slowed and pulled into an unfamiliar parking lot.
Outside the windshield, you read a sign that was lit up in bright pink letters ‘Saffy’s Sapphic Bar.’ You started in awe, this bar is one you’re never been to.
“Is this new?” You whispered, still gawking out the window at the big black building with gorgeous writing.
“Yeah! It’s the first lesbian bar in our area that’s not like 30 minutes away,” Ellie laughed. She, unfortunately, removed her hand from yours and turned the keys out of the ignition. “You okay with being here?”
You turned your body towards her, “Duh! It’s a lesbian bar, we’re going to have a lot of fun.
A smile tugged at the corners of Ellie's lips as she heard your words, and her eyes sparkled mischievously. "Let's get inside, babe," she suggested, her voice dripping with charm.
The affectionate nickname sent a rush of butterflies fluttering through your chest, making your heart pound furiously against your ribcage as if it were trying to break free from its confines.
The way she continued to call you endearments, and each one sent a wave of heat coursing through you, leaving you feeling both flustered and exhilarated.
You nodded in agreement, feeling a surge of affection course through your body as Ellie quickly exited the car and made her way to your side. Before you could even react, she had the passenger side door open for you and the gesture made your heart skip a beat. Once you stepped out of her car, Ellie grabbed your hand, gently lacing your fingers through hers.
Her touch sends a wave of warmth through your entire body. The simple act of holding your hand made you feel safe, cared for, and utterly more captivated by her. Your attraction somehow deepens, if possible.
Ellie felt the way you shivered for a minute and gave your hand two gentle squeezes. You squeezed back, “Thank you for taking me here, Els.”
“Of course, now let’s go,” she stepped forward and you felt your hand tugged in tow with the movement. You giggled as you felt your hand being pulled along her with every movement. As you caught up to her stride, you heard her voice, warm and soothing, as she said, “Atta, girl.”
The praise and affection in her tone, made you suddenly feel aroused. You weren’t expecting Ellie to be one to praise, especially now and here of all places. She was full of surprises.
You walked side by side to the door of the bar. Ellie opened the door, still holding your hand and she waited for you to walk in, before following in after you. She didn’t want you to sit there and have you holding her hand, uncomfortably.
As if you could be uncomfortable holding her hand…
The bar was dim, candles aligning the bar, the small dance floor had people dancing around, and there were small tables and chairs, throughout the room for people.
You took the lead, grabbing Ellie’s hand more firmly as you steered her in the direction of the bar, feeling a sudden urge to quench your nerves with a drink.
Ellie easily caught onto your intentions and laughed, “Someone’s eager to get a drink.” She let you guide her towards the bar counter.
One of the bartenders saw you approaching and smiled, “Hey ladies! What can I get started for you?”
You thought for a second before speaking, “Can I get for starters one shot of Tequila and then after a Margarita, please?”
“Of course, hun!” The bartender chirped, then looked at Ellie, “And for you?”
“I'll take a cold beer, please," Ellie muttered, her focus more on you than the bartender. It wasn't intentional, but rather a natural reaction to the way the lighting highlighted your features and made your body look even more mesmerizing. Her focus on you was completely involuntary, and she couldn't help the way her eyes kept lingering all over you.
The bartender nodded and smiled to herself before preparing yours and Ellie’s drinks.
“So after we drink a little,” you pointed a finger playfully on her chest, “we need to dance!” You giggled, the atmosphere of the bar was so nice and inviting.
The dance floor was a vibrant mix of movement and sound, with people dancing and chatting with each other all around. As the music boomed from the DJ’s setup, colorful lights flickered behind the bodies of dancing people, casting a kaleidoscope of light and shadow upon the floor. Around you, the atmosphere became infectious and your body urged to move with the music in the very air around you.
“Here you go, ladies!” The bartender replied, setting your drinks down on the counter.
“Thank you,” you responded with a small smile as you took your shot. A small wince escaped your lips as the liquid met your tongue, however the warm and smooth sensation that followed as the liquid traveled down your throat was soothing, and you felt relief wash over you.
The taste of alcohol wasn’t your favorite, but the effect of it was undeniable. You were grateful for the temporary escape it provided from the nerves that previously had been coiled within you since the night began.
Ellie took a sip of her beer, and you felt a brief moment of disappointment as her hand left yours. However, she remained close by your side, not wanting to create distance between the two of you. Ellie glanced over your features as you took a sip from your Margarita.
Before you could dance, you slid your car towards the bar tenders and left her a cash tip of $10. You smiled at her when she handed the car back, you waved to her before focusing on Ellie.
“Want to go dance, now?” You questioned.
Ellie inhaled for a second, glancing at the dance floor, then took another sip of her beer. She nodded quickly, “Yeah, let’s go.”
You both placed your drinks on a nearby surface, and you couldn’t help but suggest you dance together. The idea had been in your head since you got there, but the idea seemed to intimidate Ellie. A mix of emotions flashed across her face both of excitement and nervousness.
You could see the hint of nervousness in her eyes, but at the same time, there was a spark of excitement in them. Her freckled cheeks were flushed in the lights, and she gulped. She felt like a deer in headlights for a brief moment, before you grabbed her hand and pulled her towards the dance floor.
Ellie’s eyes widened, your body moving in ways she didn’t think you would. She could see you feeling yourself in the music, slowly moving your hips against hers… and suddenly she forgot about being nervous because… fuck.
Here you were, swaying your hips, basically grinding against her and you looked stunning. The makeup you wore brought out your features so effortlessly, and the lighting of the bar… God, it made you look like an angel in Ellie’s eyes. To say you were irresistible is true.
Ellie allowed her body to give in and move to the music, you hummed feeling her hands wrap around your hips suddenly. You looked over your shoulder to see Ellie shoot you a smile, you felt the movement of her body moving with yours.
It was hot, the way you both moved together so effortlessly to the music. You turned around to face her, no longer wanting to see her face.
Ellie didn’t stop dancing, holding you close as she continued to move both of you in a slow but rhythmic manner. Her hand moved up to cup your cheek, her gaze locked onto yours, filled with affection and desire.
As you leaned into her gentle touch, relishing in the warmth of her hands on your skin, you could sense her eyes flicking down to your lips. Your tongue darted out, wetting your lips.
With a soft groan, she gently scolded you, “Babe, you can’t do that. I want to kiss you.” Her words were filled with both pleading and desire, the eye contact she held with you while saying that had your knees buckling.
“Then kiss me,” you teased. Before you could utter another word, Ellie eagerly leaned down and captured your lips in a firm, needy kiss.
Your eyes shut automatically as you reciprocated the kiss, savoring every moment of her lips pressed against yours. You didn’t want this to stop, and when Ellie’s tongue gently begged for entry, you willingly opened your mouth. Her tongue glided against yours in a passionate dance, you felt a cold sting of metal.
Wait a second… does she have a fucking tongue piercing? You moaned softly at the feeling, the intensity of the moment only growing stronger as you lost yourselves in the kiss.
Ellie’s hands descended to your waist, pulling you even closer, which deepened the kiss. You responded by wrapping your arms around her neck, your fingers idly playing with the hairs at the back of her head. The closeness was electrifying, sending shivers down your spine as she pulled back from the kiss.
Both of you were panting from the heated kiss, your chest was rising and falling. Ellie gave your waist a gentle squeeze, her firm grip on you was both possessive and hot at the same time.
Your body responded to her touch as if her hands were leaving a trail of fire in their wake. The alcohol coursing through your veins fueled your courage and emboldened your actions. The heat of her touch was almost more intoxicating than the alcohol itself, and you craved more of Ellie.
“When were you going to tell me you had a tongue piercing?” You panted out, twisting a strand of her hair between your fingers. Ellie smiled, a toothy grin appearing across her face.
“Guess I’m just full of surprises,” her voice was low, her lips hovering over yours, mere inches apart.
“Yeah? Guess you should show me,” your voice sweet like honey. It was a clear invitation, so Ellie closed the short distance between you two.
You were caught off guard by the unexpected moan that escaped Ellie's lips, the sound muffled against your own as your tongue sucked on hers. The noise sent a surge of heat straight to your core, making you ache for more.
In response, one of your hands moved up to cup her face, pulling her closer as you tried to deepen the kiss, desperation and need coursing through your body. The air around you thickened with desire, and you knew you wanted more - much, much more.
Ellie pulled back, breaking the passionate connection between your lips, a thin strand of saliva linking you for a brief moment before it snapped. You couldn’t help but whine at the loss of contact, your body craving her. Ellie looked at you, her green eyes darkened with sheer desire, and she asked, “Let’s go back to my car, yeah?”
You noticed the huskiness in her voice, and you wondered if she was just as needy as you. Either way, the proposition sent a thrill down your spine.
Your head eagerly nodded to her words, Ellie smirked a bit at your eagerness but understood. She clasped your hand in hers, before dragging you to the doorway of the bar. You felt as though you were on cloud nine, the giddiness of the whole situation settling in.
When you both exited the building, you felt the cold air hit you. You sighed softly, enjoying the coolness on your skin vs how hot it was only moments ago.
As you and Ellie neared her car, you expected her to open the passenger side door for you, but instead, the backdoor was open. Your eyebrows furrowed, confusion obvious on your face.
“Why the-“ you let out a squeal, caught off guard when Ellie lifted you and plopped you into her backseat.
“Wanna kiss you some more, can’t do it well sitting elsewhere,” Ellie mumbled as she pulled herself into the car and closed the door behind her.
“Are you okay with this?” Her arm reached out to your shoulder, eyes looking into yours. She needed confirmation you were okay with this.
“Of course, please do something, Els,” you begged.
Ellie’s body inched closer to yours, yearning to touch you finally in the privacy of her car. Her tattooed arm flexed as she grabbed one of your thighs, giving it a firm squeeze.
The whine you let out was swallowed by her lips, the two of you exchanging quick and hot pecks. As the kisses grew hotter, Ellie’s hand traveled to your ass. She grabbed the fat of your ass in her hand, savoring the feeling of how it felt in her hands.
Ellie was completely mesmerized by how your delicate skin felt against her rough skin. It didn’t help when her tongue poked out to enter your mouth, you allowed her in. Her mouth swallowed your tiny moans and whines, and the cold metal of her piercing swiped against your wet muscle.
You’d never before kissed anyone with a tongue piercing, but the feeling of it against your tongue made you let out a low moan. Ellie pulled back, her hand gave your ass a teasing squeeze. The suddenness of her action caused you to yelp from surprise.
Ellie chuckled, “If you’re okay with this… can I…” her eyes adverted from yours to the side, “can I go down on you?” She finally finished.
“Yes, oh my god,” you replied, eagerly connecting your lips in a kiss. Ellie smiled in the kiss, before separating quickly.
“Let’s take these off, yeah? My pretty girl,” her hand tugged at your skirt. Unzipping the skirt was easy, so you shimmed out of it, leaving you in just your little pink lace thong.
Ellie whistled, seeing you in your top and now just thong. Her pussy pulsated at the sight, you felt so exposed under her watchful eye. A blush spread across her freckled cheeks as her eyes ranked up and down your body.
“Ellie… you can take them off… please,” your voice was needy and whiny. Within the small space of the car, the air between you both became thick, the windows becoming foggy.
“Mmm patience, pretty,” Ellie purred out. She pulled your panties down and maneuvered your body so you could lie down comfortably. “This comfortable?”
You gave her a nod of reassurance before she unexpectedly swiped her long, slender fingers through your wet pussy. Ellie almost moaned, collecting your wetness with her digits before bringing them to her lips. She licked her fingers clean, eyes rolling back into her head at the taste of you.
Ellie then lowered her head and made her way to where you needed her the most. You spread your thighs, allowing her to slot her head between them. She then licked a strip from your clit down to your hole, which caused you to grab a fistful of her hair.
The movement of her wet tongue on your pussy felt so good, your thighs shook as she continued to lick around your pussy. Slurping noises could be heard, Ellie pushed her tongue into your tight, little hole.
“Oh- fuck! Ellie! Pleaseee,” the sensation of her filling you up with her tongue made you so desperate and whiny.
Ellie peered up, still licking away at your hole. Her eyes darkened seeing your eyes roll to the back of your head, feeling you pull at her hair, and the way you tasted made her absolutely pussy drunk.
Her own eyes rolled into her head, her tongue entering and exiting your hole, before she licked her way back up to your clit. Her focus stayed there as she wanted to make you sensitive and squirmy.
Ellie kept a grip on your thighs to keep you in place, she moved her hand down to your pussy, and slipped in two fingers.
You felt a sudden stretch inside of yourself, your wetness echoing in the car, which caused Ellie to suck harder. The feeling of her fingers going in and out of you, along with the coolness of her piercing had you so close to the edge.
Ellie whined, and your fingers dug more into her hair. “Please… oh pleaseee… Ellie, I’m so close!” Your body wanted to rive around from how good the combination of her tongue and fingers working against you felt.
Ellie so desperately wanted to make you cum, and she was going to get you there. Your begging was egging her on, her boxers dampened just from going down on you.
“Such a good girl,” Ellie groaned, head still buried between your thighs. Ellie continued to work her fingers in and out of your tight, cunt. Squelching noises filled the car, she was relentless and wouldn’t stop. Her fingers curled, hitting your sweet spot.
Your mouth fell open, the action only made her go harder, sucking at your clit and swirling it around in her mouth like a fucking lollipop. That with the combination of her fingers, sent you over the edge.
“Ellie! Fuck!” You screamed, back arching as you came around her fingers. Ellie slipped her fingers out and into her mouth, her eyes closed at the taste as she enjoyed it.
One thing about Ellie is she loved giving head. She was pussy drunk off you. Popping her fingers out of her mouth, she licked the remaining of your cum from between your legs, leaving none behind.
A small groan was heard from her, you whined feeling her still licking away, your poor clit so sensitive.
“Els… please m’ too sensitive now,” you frowned. You didn’t want her to stop, but god were you sensitive now?
“Sorry… got carried away you taste really good,” she replied, getting up from between your thighs. She leaned down and kissed you, her tongue darting into your mouth for entry, and you felt the taste of yourself lingering in her mouth. That fucking tongue piercing…
You both pulled away, your breathing particularly harder after your intense orgasm. “Lemme get my clothes back on,” you shimmed into your underwear and skirt.
Your legs wobbling as you did, Ellie took notice and bit her lip at the sight.
“Was it that good?” Ellie teased, and you playfully hit her shoulder.
“Oh shut up! You know it was,” you both laughed.
Ellie gently kissed your forehead, “Wanna stay at my place tonight? We should stop for some dinner.
You eagerly nodded, “I would love that, thank you.”
“Course, love. Let’s get to the front of the car now,” you agreed and moved to climb to the passenger seat. Ellie playfully hit your butt as you climbed into the seat.
You gasped, turning back to look at her. She just smirked, getting into the driver's side. You both comfortably got into your seats, and Ellie started the car.
“Ready?” Ellie turned to you, you finished clicking your seatbelt into place.
“Course, let’s go!” You squealed and moved to grab her hand for the ride.
The car drove to her apartment, where you enjoyed late-night fast food and were cuddled to sleep by her. Success? I think so.
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hairmetal666 · 2 months ago
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There's a boy, Eddie meets a boy, and it's mundane because they're boys and it's summer and they find each other like lonely boys in summer do. It shouldn't be the defining experience of Eddie's life, that summer, that boy. His memories are all sun drenched, tanned skin, minnow catching, swimming, camping under the stars, a fumbling, toasted-marshmallow-sticky first kiss. He grows up and still Eddie thinks there will never be anyone else like that boy.
---
There's this new teen soap schlock on the CW. It fills his social media algorithms with gossip and BTS footage and spoilers. He ignores every bit of it, so far from the target audience it's laughable.
Jeff, Gareth, and Freak get into it. At first, he takes this as a betrayal of the highest order, threatens to kill all their characters in their next dnd session, but they convince him to give it a shot.
It's airs Thursday nights and thank god Wayne is at work, he'd never live it down. He turns the TV on just in time for the cold open, and within ten seconds there's a beautiful man on screen. Chestnut hair, coiffed carefully back; down-turned, hazel puppy dog eyes; freckles and moles dotting his face and neck--Eddie would recognize them anywhere, spent hours mapping the constellations of them during their one magical summer.
He sinks to his knees in front of the TV--nose inches from the screen--watches the whole episode that way. For the entire hour, the only thing he sees is Steve Harrington.
Eddie doesn't move until after the credits have rolled. He can't believe that the boy he knew all those years ago is an actor on a popular show, that he'd just missed finding him, all this time.
Before he can talk himself out of it, he Googles, which is a mistake immediately, because the most popular pictures are from a GQ photoshoot where Steve is very wet and very shirtless, the amount of chest hair on display enough to kill a man. He forgets how to breathe for several seconds, before quickly scrolling away, which is also a mistake because it's how he learns that Steve 1) dated his castmate, Nancy Wheeler for several years before 2) she got caught cheating on him with another castmate, and 3) he's often seen out and about with his current on-screen girlfriend, Robin Buckley.
For his own sanity, he has to put his phone away. It isn't like he's going to see Steve ever again, obviously, so he needs to forget all this. Keep the memory of that summer safe.
---
It's late spring and Gareth invites them all to their favorite bar in Indianapolis. One of their friends from their Corroded Coffin days got a gig playing bass for some up and coming indie guy, tickets and drinks are comped. It's not their usual vibe, musically, but who is Eddie to say no to a free night out?
And, look, night of, the music isn't his vibe, but the place is packed and he's with his best friends, and the drinks are flowing, so even he finds himself swaying along to the whiney hipster shit coming from the stage.
Eventually, the lights go down for the headliner, and the crowd crushes forward in a way Eddie isn't used to in this bar. He lets himself be pushed forward, somehow ending up right in front of the stage.
When the lights go up, he stops breathing.
It's Steve.
Steve right there in front of him, guitar strapped across his midsection. He's wearing dorky little Ray-Ban sunglasses, but Eddie would know that hair, those moles, anywhere.
There's no way Steve will notice him, remember him, but it's enough to see him now, to hear his music. Eddie dances and smiles at the boy who got away. Maybe he'll mourn later for the distant hope he harbored deep within his heart. But, he thinks, this is enough.
Steve comes out for the encore, takes off the sunglasses, tosses them straight to Eddie, smiles big and genuine and familiar. His heart stops. It can't be real, it can't mean anything, but he's so elated that his soul might rise from his body.
The show ends, the buzz of it, of Steve, reverberating through Eddie as he makes his way back to the bar. It's crowded with people, but he slides through the bodies until he's at the front. Someone taps him on the back, and he thinks they're trying to get through, but when he turns it's Steve.
His smile is so beautiful, Eddie thinks that maybe he's dying.
"Eddie!" Steve says.
"Stevie!" He doesn't mean for the old nickname to come out, couldn't keep it in.
"You remember me!" Steve is beaming.
"I'd never forget you." He's smiling just as hard. "Can I buy you a drink?"
Steve's nose wrinkles. "I've got, like, fifty coming. We could go somewhere quiet to talk?"
He's never said yes to something so fast in his life.
They go back to the postage stamp sized green room, and he's surprised to see Robin Buckley there. His stomach shrivels for a second, but she stands and he sees the lesbian flag painted on the side of her Converse, the oversized vest she's wearing.
"You want me to skedaddle?" She asks. He loves her immediately.
"Do you mind?" Steve asks. Robin shakes her head.
"Nice to meet you, Eddie," she calls as she sails out the door.
"You told her about me?" He knows his smile is downright goofy.
Steve blushes. "Um, yeah. Maybe a little? Just that I met a boy from near here one summer. And, uh, maybe something about him being my first kiss?"
"Oh." Eddie thinks he might burst into flame. "I wasn't sure if--I didn't know if you'd remember."
"I'd never forget," Steve says.
"You got famous." Eddie says, which is dumb, but he doesn't know how to deal with Steve cherishing those childhood memories the same way he does.
"I guess I did." Steve looks down, hair tumbling around his face. "It's probably not what you were expecting."
"Did I expect to turn on the tv and see my first crush staring at me in HD? Not quite. But It was amazing. You're amazing."
"I'm on a CW show," Steve laughs.
"So?"
"I think maybe you're a little biased about your first crush."
"Are you saying that's a bad thing?" They're flirting, he thinks. Can't believe it's happening, that Steve might--
"Well, maybe, but only if you tell me you don't have a crush on me anymore."
"Are you kidding? I saw that GQ photoshoot."
Steve's laugh is loud and bright, like fireworks in Eddie's chest. They're closer now, sharing warmth, breath.
"I have some candids if you want to see."
"Don't tempt me with a good time, Stevie."
They're quiet for a second, Eddie a little breathless from how hard they're flirting, how right it feels.
"You were great out there," he says.
"Thanks." Steve smiles, bashful. "I know it's not your kind of music."
Eddie shrugs. "I like what you do."
"And to think, you've barely gotten a taste yet." Steve pauses for a beat, horror dawning on his face. "Oh, shit. That was--I'm sorry--I--Robin says I always come on too strong, and I promised I would play it cool, but--"
"You never have to play it cool with me," Eddie says, sincere through his laughter.
"This is fast, though, right? I mean. The second I saw you in the crowd, it--it confirmed everything I thought when we first met. That's--is that crazy?"
Eddie's smile is softer now. "Not at all." Gently, he cups Steve's cheek with his hand. "Can I kiss you?"
"Please," Steve breathes. "God, Eddie, please."
Their mouths meet and it starts out sweet and slow, but it's not childhood crushes anymore. Eddie's tongue teases at the seam of Steve's lips, which part for him like he's the only one in the world with the magic words.
It's sweeter than any marshmallow.
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amazinglyashy · 6 months ago
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Hi! I was wondering if I could request a prompt where the reader is out at night with the LIs, wearing a pretty outfit, a man just approaches her and rudely asks “how much for a bj?” How would they react/protect her from such a creep?
(Sorry, for my English, I hope it made sense haha🤞🏼)
Very Minor N/SFW Warning!! This one really made me laugh because this has happened to me before, and the situation mostly pans out with my own partner having to yank me away to avoid having to post bail on me later in the evening. Remember to leash your dogs kids! Thank you for the request!! <3
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LaDS men when you get catcalled/propositioned on the street
Xavier -
He's apologizing profusely to you because the ensuing bloodspray from how hard he punched the guy in the nose got on your dress and he genuinely feels awful about it.
There is not much to it, besides he acted embarrassingly quickly, to the point you wonder to yourself if he's just been silently waiting for this moment to come.
He's used to going out with you for drinks or evening dates- it's one of the more common ways for the two of you to hang out aside from spending the evening in one of your apartments with the other. Juggling work and clocking out with social activities would also mean walking late at night, to go to a movie or even on a snack run.
So needless to say, he has in fact, been mentally preparing himself for something like this to happen.
He can't help it.
He doesn't ever want to see you disrespected- he doesn't care the context. Work, family, friends-
And now, what, a stranger asking you for sexual favors?
You wait calmly with him while he speaks to the officers about what happened, trying to contain your giggles at how sheepishly he looks at the ground, his face still painted with the most adorable anger.
Zayne -
Quickly, he's pushed you behind himself and holding eye contact with the guy. It doesn't matter if he's drunk, or perfectly sober, Zayne won't excuse someone saying such a ridiculous thing to you.
He has his usual air of politeness and manners, but the bite in his voice is more than apparent, even to someone who doesn't know him. Dressed as nicely as he is with the air he carries around him, it's a weird experience for those who don't know how protective Zayne can get.
He will tell the man to give you an apology and back off, or there will be consequences.
You know what those consequences are, and despite feeling smug about how protective Zayne is, you're trying to grab his arm and stop him, to no avail.
If the creep tries to reach for you, Zayne will back up into you to force you back gently, and the man will quickly realize that he can't reach forward anymore-
Even as Zayne walks away with you, the ice is still creeping up the man's body. Slow enough, but still moving.
Hopefully an OTTO calls for help in time. Hypothermia at night would suck.
Rafayel -
He's immediately between you and the guy, hand long since dropped your own as he crosses his arms and stares the guy down.
If you hadn't known him so long, you would expect him to fire off a tirade of insults and comments at the guy- but you know Rafayel. You know him well.
He tells the guy to back off, in the most simple of terms as he glare is enough to set the man alight- and Rafayel's evol does just that when the guy doesn't seem to back down- lighting up the shoulders of his clothing and causing him to flay around screaming, as Rafayel pulls you to keep walking.
The amount of tasteful compliments on your attire rise, and you know he's doing it to keep you from internalizing the earlier interaction and stop dressing how you want.
He doesn't need some random freak to keep you from expressing yourself how you want to. Of course, he'll always find you attractive, and the little outfit you're wearing is doing numbers to him, but that's not his focus here at all.
He wants you to feel comfortable, confident-
And he'll do everything in his power to make sure you always do.
Sylus -
I am not entirely sure the man who's asking you has finished his sentence before he's slammed once against a nearby building and then released.
Sylus makes no motion to indicate that it was his doing, continuing to walk along with you to wherever the two of you had been going in the first place-
But you knew.
You had seen his stupid red mist envelope him.
For a second, you'd been scared that he was going to kill the guy- and while you knew someone who was comfortable saying such a thing to someone needed to be put in their place, 'murder' was not at all the same as 'putting someone in their place'.
No, he was just slightly- sort of- broken.
Just a bit.
Sylus won't react much, he may give a passing comment about the man, but otherwise, he's back to complimenting you or conversing with you about whatever subject you two had been discussing prior to the creep showing up.
"Sorry, sweetie. I know you don't like bugs. I tried to handle it as... efficiently, as possible."
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writella · 3 months ago
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Here He Is, Finally
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Synopsis: “When’s it gonna be my turn? Open me up, tell me you like it, fuck me to death, love me until I love myself—” This is a story about the inner struggles of a desiring Daryl who just wants to be free of the perceptions the town, and his own mind, have put on him, so he can love you and love himself, in the ways he’s always wanted to.
—or: As Daryl becomes the talk of the town, insecurity sets in that hinders him from having sex with you— the thing you most want to do.
Details: Daryl Dixon x fem!reader, ambiguous age gap, mixing early seasons’ + later seasons’ personality of Daryl, the town being mean but also thinking Daryl’s hot because he is, discussions of gossiping, insecurity, and poor self-image, Daryl fights someone :), and smut— unprotected + he’s nervous but then it gets good, and it’s their/Daryl’s/your first time in whatever way you want it to be.
A/N: He’s literally me (I’m a girl).
— With love from writella. ♡
There it was. You finally said it. You told Daryl that you were ready to have sex.
When you told him, the two of you were having a quiet morning and he was about to leave. Pulling yourself up to his height, you wrapped your arms around his shoulders, and he took you by the waist, one hand reached up to hold your head, rubbing his thumb there. Good, you had thought, he’s reciprocating. That let you know he was okay, but still, underneath, you knew he was embarrassed about last night. You weren’t going to bring it up though, not then. You wanted to move forward, to show him that you didn’t care. “Daryl,” you started, words slow, uneasy in voice but sure in intention, as you whispered to him from above his shoulder, “I just wanted to tell you– that– I feel like I’m ready.” You paused for a moment. “And whatever you feel, I’m okay with it. Just talk to me.” As silence ensued, you kissed him on the cheek, “I love you,” you said, and pulled back.
Daryl kept his hands in yours as he looked at you. His features were sad and soft as much as they were unreadable. He kissed you on the forehead. “I love you too,” he said– it wasn’t the first time you two had exchanged those words– and then he left. Just like that.
You had no expectation for how he would react. You only knew he wouldn’t give you a flat-out no, so this, was understandable. But still, there was something hollow about it, even if his kiss and words were tender. It was another relationship moment that reminded you that these things never happen as they do in fairytale romances.
You see, you had always pictured him or whoever you were with at the time, bringing you close, kissing you, their fingers trailing down and under the hem of your skirt or pants, asking you if you were ready, if you were sure, if you wanted them to go slow, slower, but Daryl— as it turns—was incredibly pure, or at least pretending to be. Either too nervous or sensitive about these things, possibly inexperienced, or much more innocent with his intentions than you ever expected. It’s like you knew Daryl like the back of your hand, but when it came to anything about you as a couple, his history, who he’s dated before– you were clueless. You didn’t know what it could be.
One thing you did suspect, although Daryl has never told you, is that he thought of you as precious, something to be delicate with, like a flower. Sometimes you’d tell him he didn’t have to be so slow or soft when you were kissing– he was always a little sloppy anyway– and whenever there was a task to get done you’d be the first to tell anyone you could do it yourself— he knew this about you. And it’s not like he babies you or anything, that was never his way. Like when you two were fighting walkers, or doing work around the communities, or when he’d teach you how to do something. You’ve even told him that he could be a bit demanding sometimes; grouchy, rough, even; and he agreed– that was true. He didn’t do it on purpose, the whole being hard on you thing. But alone? When he was on top of you or you over him? Waking up to you? Feeling your hand reach for his own in the dark? Even just eating dinner with you? The guy was a mess! A little boy, even. Heart racing. Eyes averted at times.
Whenever he nipped you, on the lips, or the neck, maybe he pushed you on the bed too hard, grabbed your waist too tight that it squeezed the bone, there were always silent apologizes of gentle circles, sweet kisses, and tongue licks to soothe the pain or possible bruises he left on you. And sometimes, when you’re home alone or you shower together, and he starts to kiss you or pull you in by the waist, he almost always sets out with the intention that this time he’d finally do it— the sex thing— he always wanted to. Only if you knew! Honestly, he’d feel like such a pervert if he let you know how many times, both before and after you got together, that he’s thought of being inside you, or you on your knees for him, or him kissing up your thighs and tasting you– he genuinely thinks he’d really like it, all of it, but especially that. But every time you’ve kissed and kissed enough, he’d get too overwhelmed about how to proceed or too nervous to even try. He tells you that you two should shower or go to bed or that he has to go for whatever reason. So all you’ve done is grind on each other, a lot, but that’s about it. You know he’s gotten hard and you’ve gotten wet, but you’re not sure if he’s ever noticed. He wants to put his hands in your pants, he wants to rip your blouse, he wants to squeeze your breast and slap your ass, but every time he thinks about actually doing it, he feels it's too forward or raunchy, or maybe it's not actually like him in the way he’s pictured in his head, or maybe you’d hate it, and specifically the way he did it. And he has thought about doing it slowly, romantically, but every time he thinks about doing that, he feels stupid, thinking he’ll come off as clumsy and pathetic to you. He doesn’t exactly get the concept of slow and sexy yet— reaching up, breathing you in, letting his fingers linger, or hands caress and massage. It’s not that he couldn’t do it though, or so he thinks, if he really tries; it's that doesn’t even think he’s sexy to begin with.
The only thing Daryl knows for sure are the things people call him when they think he’s not listening.
“Deep and… grunty,” one much too young girl said to her equally young friend who giggled, indicating her agreement even if she was too afraid to verbalize it. “I just like his voice,” the first girl said, “it’s sexy.” Or, “Wild,” as one of Aaron’s friends whispered to him, “Like he could throw me around, do it in front of the whole town, and wouldn’t care who saw.” To which Aaron scoffed and replied, “That’s literally my fucking friend.” But in truth, it’s not like he hadn’t thought about it himself, how Daryl looked underneath his vest and button-downs– it was just once though!– he promises!– as if he needed to explain it to himself. He even told his husband about it; they had agreed on Daryl’s attractiveness. Eric called it “rugged,” and they laughed about it over dinner. Now, Aaron would repeat that word as he overheard another group of ladies discussing ways to describe or trademark some of the male leaders in town. As Aaron passed by, “rugged,” was his suggested alternative to the word “beast” when one older lady described Daryl, in a way that would make anyone not a part of the conversation cringe, “Beast, sexy armed beast.” But Aaron was only met with silence and weird hums until a girl replied that “sexy armed rugged,” doesn’t make any sense. Accordingly, all the ladies agreed. As Aaron walked away, wanting nothing more with this kind of conversation about his friends, he caught the new suggestion: “Daddy,” a girl had said with the widest smile on her face— she wasn’t a teenager, but it was obvious that this was her first time being vocal about these things. She must have felt she said something so salacious. And as much as Aaron wanted to gag, there was also a part of him that reluctantly stopped himself from laughing and blushing with the rest of the women. One of them, rolling her eyes said, “They can’t all be daddy,” to which another girl said, “But they kind of are!” and then he was too far away to hear anymore.
Daryl didn’t get any of it.
The only ones that truly bothered him though were when they added, “I know he’s a little ugly but,” or “I know he’s not my type but,” or “I know he looks a little dirty but,” “And he never does his hair but,” “And he’s not like the smartest but,” but, but, but—
It all made him feel bad about himself; more confused.
Even when it was just generally flattering, he found it hard to take any of it as a compliment. Sometimes he would, maybe the whispers of him being “kinda hot,” on the days when he’d return to his cut-off sleeved shirts, or maybe those moments when a lady would be talking to her friend saying how he’s “handsome,” or how she just knows “he’s packing–big–” and what’s better than a big dick, right? At least that is what Daryl thought (it's the bit of Merle in him) and he bets Negan wished he had one— Daryl was pretty sure Negan’s is a tiny little bitch just like his personality. No one gets to kill one of his best friends and gets more than a three-incher. Right, J.C.? If you’re even up there? Not that Daryl would mind if He were or weren’t, or cares if you cared– Daryl didn’t think about religion that much anymore anyway. And on that note, he realizes that he doesn’t do a lot of the same things he used to anymore either. Like the way he would walk around without a care, even confidently sometimes, not thinking about how much he swung his arms or the way he talked or the way his hair fell that day. There was this one time, as he was walking over to Rick in the garden, telling him he couldn’t find whatever particular tools Rick wanted, he yelled, “They ain’t there no more, Rick!” that he heard some older guy say to his friend that Daryl sounded like a “human gremlin,” to which the friend tried to one-up him by replying, “more like garbage disposal.” Then another day, some girl said he looks like a “wet rat sometimes,” especially when his hair is flat or, as said in the phrase, wet; and he never forgot it, either of them, or anything anyone has ever said about him. It’s always been like this. Even when he was a kid.
Daryl tries to remember that people have just gotten too comfortable now that Alexandria is back on track, or at least that’s basically what you had said once. When it happened, Daryl came into your room, huffing and throwing himself on your desk chair saying, “Some people don’t know how to keep their mouths shut.” To which you had asked him what was wrong, but he shook his head.
“Well,” you begin, responding to his un-answer, “some gossip is misogynized. It used to be a way for women to spread information, but–” you avoid the lecture— “I get what you mean.” You look at him, seeing the way his eyes still drift. “I can’t tell you everything, but Rosita and I had heard some people speculate on the whole her and Saddiq and Gabriel thing.” You shook your head, your eyes rolling a little, “It made her upset. I could tell. But it took her a while to talk about it. I think some people forget they can talk behind closed doors now. Our porches aren’t as private as they used to be and… people have gotten mean.” To that, you both nodded in agreement and then you climbed toward the edge of your bed to hold his hand. Something was obviously wrong. “Has anyone said anything about you?”
Again, he shakes his head and you have to leave it at that— all he wanted to do was ask questions about you now, and he wouldn’t let you change the subject.
But at home, alone, he stares at the mirror, trying to see what other people see, the more decent things: handsome, rugged, possibly wild… but all he saw were things that he didn’t understand, things that made him feel he wasn’t good enough. Did they really think he was attractive? And if so, why did they always have to bring up that there was something completely unattractive about him before the compliment? And why were those remarks always easier to believe? Or was it all just some weird fantasy they felt dirty about having? And was being rude behind his back some sort of justification for that guilt? Was it all of the above? And most importantly, did you think any of this?
Next Saturday, a week after you told him you were ready, the town gathered in the church during the evening for the monthly communal meal. This was something that started during the rehabilitation of Alexandria, another thing that the population was getting too big to contain, but Rick and Judith liked it. So, Michonne agreed to keep it— for now— despite reasoning that “this is what holidays are for, Rick.”
It was about an hour in, 6pm, and sunset now past. Some people who had been busy working were still filing in, little by little, but for the most part, a majority of citizens were seated, eating, and chatting. There was a steady rain outside that made everything smell fresh, and if it wasn’t for all the chatter, you could even possibly hear the light drumming on the church walls. Everyone was quite pleased about it— an early spring was approaching.
Daryl had not come to see you last night and left early this morning so you didn’t know where he went or what he did, but what you did know for certain is that he never carried an umbrella. Therefore, when he finally arrived, 30 minutes later, his hair was soaked, and since he didn’t even wear his jacket, the long sleeves of his shirt were drenched with water droplets sticking to his vest and shoes that sloshed and left wet footprints on the wooden floor.
Obvious to say, he was noticed by all.
There is a fine line with Daryl between not giving a fuck about how he was perceived, and caring far too much while not willing to do anything about it, and of course, with all that has happened in the past few weeks, it was the ladder. He hated being the center of attention, but it was hard for him to not be noticeable, it never was, especially now. He felt ridiculous.
As he walks onto the stage– where all the tables of food are placed– you follow him.
“Hi,” you say next to him.
“Hi,” he replies, calling you by your nickname kindly enough, but not ever looking at you.
“You know, I think Rick was hoping you were coming back on time. I don’t know why he put all that stuff on his chair if it wasn’t for you or Michonne and Michonne sat with me.”
He simply nods, humming as acknowledgment.
“Daryl,” you move to the other side of the table as he gathers his food so he can look at you. Quietly you say, “We don’t have to talk about it now, but– I hope I didn’t make you feel uncomfortable the other day. Or if it was about the night before, you just have to tell me.” You poke his shoulder, “You’re acting weird and you know it.”
“You didn’t make me uncomfortable,” is all he grumbles.
“But I still want to say I’m sorry if I did.”
Daryl quickly finds some napkins to dry his hands and wrists with and comes over to place them on the sides of your head to kiss you there. “You ain’t got anything to be sorry about. Alright? I’m fine.” His hands drop and holds you by the neck for a moment, the movement makes some water droplets bleed onto your clothes, you feel it but you say nothing. The only thing Daryl notices from you is that your eyes look almost identical to his despite the differing color– his mood is affecting yours, but he doesn’t know what to say right now to make you feel better so he opts for something he always know is true, “You’re perfect. You know that right?” And I’m just fuckin’ weirdo, he wants to add, but he doesn’t.
You were smiling at him. He doesn’t get it. He looked like an idiot all soaking wet and you were smiling at him. There couldn’t be a better reaction, but still, it’s moments like this where he can’t believe you’re real. All you say is “Okay,” never taking a compliment, just like him, instead of finding a way to break-up with him like he always nearly suspects. “Come to me when you finish, alright? We can leave if you want?”
“Alright,” he responds and you leave him be.
As Daryl goes down the rows of tables picking out what he wants, he heads to the last one. The way the event was set up was that everyone who came early had the opportunity to take a seat at one of the four tables that were placed along each corner of the stage and the rest sat in the pews, but despite the higher vantage point the stage gave, that did not mean Daryl couldn’t hear what those around the stage were saying around him— as always. It must be a hunter’s ear or something.
“Be careful,” a woman says smirking, her eyes gesturing to Daryl. “Let’s hope he doesn’t wet us.” The friend in front of her snickers, looking back to see that Daryl is now by the table just above theirs. Whispering, the first woman continues, shaking her head, “I don’t know how Rick or the girl put up with it. She just acted like nothing was wrong. He’s mudding up the whole damn church!”
Daryl keeps his back turned. This ends up being his last straw. “How about you shut the fuck up,” he mutters.
“Excuse me?”
Louder, facing no one in particular he yells, “Why does everyone act like I don’t got ears?”
You look up, synchronized with everyone in the church and get up with Rick who is already slowly approaching him, but Michonne yanks you down.
“What is your problem?”
To that, he turns back to the woman, “How ‘bout you say what you said again and stop talking shit under your breath.”
“What?”
“I said,” he starts yelling again, “if you got somethin’ to say about me lady, say it to ma’ face. That’s what I said.”
“Hey, what’s goin’ on?” Rick asks almost warningly, but not before someone yells, “Who the fuck are you talking to, man?” from one of the aisles in the back. It was her husband, now standing from his seat. He and his wife make eye contact, and instantly he’s moving closer.
Daryl walks to the edge of the front stage, barking a quick “move” without any pause and Eugene and Siddiq violently bob their heads and grab their plates as Daryl steps on the table and jumps to the floor.
Rick tries to push him back but it’s no use, Daryl pushes him in return and he and the husband are charging at each other, speaking over each other: “What did you say to my wife?” “Told her to shut the fuck up. Thought I said it loud enough–” “Nah, man you were mumblin’ like always–” “Or d’you need me to say it louder with ma garbage disposal mouth?” Daryl pushes him, “Huh?” “I’m not fighting you, man.” But Daryl persists, getting in the man’s face, their noses almost touching. He whispers, “You know, maybe your wife’s got everyone’s name in her mouth because she don’t fuckin’ like you.” The man keeps shaking his head, but Daryl surprises him, he isn’t the only one the town gossips about. “She’s fucking Mark,” he tells him. That was true, and people knew it. “He’s your friend, ain’t he? Maybe that’s why she’s always–” But no, not him, her husband did not know, so he punches, straight in the eye. Daryl almost smiles as he takes the next swing.
The two are tussling, but not for long as Rick takes the chance to get Daryl from behind, taking him away with Gabriel’s help. “You done?” Rick asks as Gabriel holds him on the other side, His grip honestly does nothing though and Daryl shrugs him off. Poor Gabe looks like he’s about to have an aneurysm to see the church– practically his church– in such disarray.
With that, and with Daryl raging too much to contain, he shrugs Rick off and stomps out.
Michonne finally takes her hand off of your wrist and you make you way to leave too. As you walk, you look back to Rick who is already trying to follow, and wordlessly tell him that it’s your turn now, then, turn to awkwardly dodge the people still standing in the aisle and collect your things to go.
Daryl was not hard to find. It almost made you think he wanted to be found or knew you’d go after him— he’s being such a child today. Despite the town lights, you hold out your flashlight to find him sits on a tree stump on the edge of town next to one of his favorite trees. The leaves did a terrible job of covering him from anything but you knew he didn’t care. It was almost laughable honestly. Still, you take pity, he was yours and you were concerned. “I know you don’t care about getting wet,” you say with no malice or disappointment in your voice, “but all that water in your shoes can cause blisters. You didn’t even wear the ones that don’t have holes.”
He just shakes his head, as always, and water droplets fall from the tips of his hair.
“Remember when that happened to me and you drained them with needles even though Saddiq told us not to?”
He stares at you, stone-faced for a moment. “You’re the one who told me to do it.”
“Because they hurt really bad!”
“You were being a baby.”
“Really?” You ask ironically. “So if I’m the baby why are you acting like one right now? It’s been raining since morning, Daryl! Not even a jacket? You’re obviously upset about something but I’m not going to continue this with you in the rain, looking like a sad, wet puppy.”
He sneered at the comment, wet.
“Let’s just go home, okay? Let me take you.”
“We don’t live together.”
You frown. “Don’t be mean, Daryl,” you gently warn. “You know what I mean.”
You hold your hand out for him, water collecting in your palm as you wait. It was more of a gesture than actual help as you two were still a few feet away from each other. “Please? You could have already ran away on your bike or gone home and locked your door but you didn’t. I don’t know what’s going on but don’t act like I don’t know you.”
Reluctantly, he gets up, walking to you in almost slow motion. You wish you could call him the drama queen he is right now, but it was time to get out of this rain– you would hold it in for the time being.
As you enter the small place, you make no conversation. You simply get to work and he doesn’t stop you. You take off your rain jacket and boots, then you take off his vest and boots. You drag him to his room and hang up your sweater and take off your jewelry, then you empty his pant pockets. Finally, you hold his hand as he trails behind you and into the bathroom. You unbutton his shirt and unzip his pants and place them all in the hamper. He takes off his underwear and helps you take off your clothes too. When you’re done, you turn on the water and go in, he follows. You bathe and wash his hair in silence. You are tender and gentle, and he knows it, he appreciates it, but his mind is loud, and angry, and he feels so pathetic as you wash him like he’s 5 years old. You turn around to start washing yourself as he takes care of cleaning his legs and lower area. After he’s done, all he can do is look at you, your body, the soft humming you can’t help but do when you shower. It’s exactly as he said, you’re perfect. He wants to bang his head against the wall because of it.
When you two finish, you sit on his bed, wearing one of his white shirts and a pair of boxers, he wears the same except his bottoms are sweatpants. He hates these kinds of casual clothes actually, he’s only okay with wearing it sometimes, but he has nothing else at the moment. All he had to do was give his clothes to Carol to wash, but he didn’t. He hasn’t really done anything this week.
“Ms. Ellen is a bitch.” You finally say, giving him an ice pack for his eye. “And so is Mr. Gary and they both have the whiteness names in the world. And they’re both lazy as fuck and reek of nepotism because they only had one of the biggest houses and biggest egos in Alexandria because they were friends with Deanna and they’re still bitter that their house being destroyed in the fire— which I get— but it’s not okay that she uses her bitterness to talk shit about everyone. And it’s also not okay that you used your anger to fight someone who didn’t deserve it. That wasn’t like you.”
“Maybe it is. You didn’t always know me.”
“Well, sure, can act like a tough—”
“I don’t act like anything—”
“Fine, I’ll change it: Can you be a tough guy? Yeah. But do you pick fights and make big scenes in front of the kids like that? No, you don’t.” You stare at him, tapping him on the knee and forcing him to look at you. “You not talking is obviously not working, Daryl. Just tell me what’s wrong.”
He takes a moment. “I just—”
“What?”
“I don’t want to disappoint you,” he finally says lowly.
“I don’t think you could,” you answer, “I’m not even now, I’m just frustrated. Or confused really. Why do you think you would?”
He lowers his ice pack, “Cause I’m not fuckin’ Rick.”
You laugh a little. “Well, I did have my suspicions, but great, that’s good to know. I’m glad you’re not fucking Rick.”
He sucks his teeth. “Be serious.”
“Have you not realized I’ve been trying to be? For weeks now? It obviously doesn’t work.” Both of you look down as you continue, “And I finally tell you how I feel and what I want and you just leave and barely talk to me for the rest of the week. And before you even mention coming into my bed at night or saying goodnight or good morning to me and telling me what you’ll do that day, that’s not talking, it's just saying stuff. At some point I can’t always chalk it up to Oh, that’s just Daryl; at some point, a person starts thinking that they're the problem. That I’m the problem! That I’m not good enough.”
A tear falls down your cheek involuntarily, then another; you were clenching your jaw after you finished speaking but it was no use. After everything, all the bullshit and the girls and the punch to his eye that really fucking hurt even though it was his fault he got it, this is actually the worst thing that has happened to Daryl in the past months– making you cry.
“You’re more than good enough,” he says in his mumble, still not looking at you. “I’m just stupid.”
“You’re not stupid!” You yell frustratingly as you wipe tears away. “Stop talking down about yourself!”
Daryl looks off into the window. He wants to speak, he does. The words are all on the tip of his tongue but they cannot come out, they never do. As he watches you wipe away your last tears, he thinks everyone is right, that that guy is right, he has a garbage mouth, his voice is poison. He never makes any sense and he always says the wrong thing. Why speak anyway?
“I can’t help you or at least try to understand if you don’t say anything. I know it's hard— I don’t like doing it either. I was scared to tell you what I did last week. But it just starts with one thing.”
“It's too hard to.”
“But I’ve never judged you, right? ”
He shakes his head. You haven’t.
“The first thing that comes to your mind when I say, ‘what’s wrong?’, what is it? Just say it. I don’t care what it is. I’m not going to judge you, I’m not going to say you’re wrong, anything—”
“People think I’m ugly,” he interrupts, “I’ve heard them say it.”
Your eyes widen, in shock for him and in shock that people could still care about such stupid things right now. “Who said that to you?”
He shakes his head. “That’s why I mentioned Rick. No one says stuff like that about Rick.”
“Well, I don’t want you to be like Rick and you don’t have to be.”
“That’s not the point.”
“Then what is?”
He gestures to himself, slapping his hands on his thighs, “Look at me.”
There’s something about the way his hand then reaches to cover his eyes in frustration, the way he slides it down to scratch his beard, accidentally magnifying to you the wisps of salt and pepper among the brown that gives you a clue to what he means. “I’m not some little girl, and I haven’t been for a long time.”
“I know, but you’re not my age either. And I don’t always think about you when it comes to it, it’s about me- I think about me.”
“So what about it? When it comes to the hair on your head and your eyes and the way you talk— that has nothing to do with how old you are, that’s just who you are. You didn’t choose to look as you do. And you and Rick have always looked the same age if I have to mention him, and his beard is whiter than yours at this point. Neither of you look old, or bad.” Your words do nothing so far. “You also have a better build than plenty of people in town. You’re stronger too.”
“But when they talk about Rick, all they say is that he talks too much and that he’s bossy and hardass and at least that’s true.”
You couldn’t help but smile, almost laughing a bit at that. It kind of was true.
“I’ve never heard anyone say things about him the way they say about me. Never anything about how he looks. But when they talk about me— they think I’m a fuckin’ animal.” There is silence after this. The word wild lingers in his mind and animal in yours. Again you want to ask, who could say that and have they not realized all Daryl has done for this place? Then, the more you listen, the more you realize that hidden beneath those with endless respect are some with hearts of cruelty and minds stuck in the regular old world ways that don’t exist anymore. “And sometimes, when I think about why you like me, I think that maybe it’s despite other things.”
“Despite?”
“Despite.” He practically spits.
“We all have bad qualities though. We’re not perfect.”
“I mean that I’m not some regular good looking guy.”
“Why would I want regular?” Your smile fades as his sad eyes persist. “Daryl, I can’t change your mind or make you feel the way I do about you, but why can’t you trust that I like you, and that I want to be around you? And that I’m,” you blush, “very attracted to you and I’ve felt like an embarrassing teenage girl the past few months waiting and trying to get you to have sex with me!” Quietly you say, “Have you not realized how much I really want you? How much I care? Everyday I feel lucky.”
He can’t take it. “Guess it’s like you said— can’t believe it if I don’t see it myself.”
His mouth is screwed shut, his throat tight, but just like you, it’s no use, a tear rolls down his cheek. Immediately you hug him. He holds you tightly in return and even though it makes your ribs hurt a little, you let him. All of this makes you see how much you two are alike than you’ve ever realized.
“You know,” you say into his hair, “there was this one time, I was up super early and couldn’t go back to sleep so I went out for a walk. I passed by Olivia’s house and she waved me over from her window and asked me if I could help her restock the pantry before Rick came later in the day to check it because she had this huge migraine. Well, that turned into me doing the whole thing for her. She said she was going inside for a break and some water and the next thing I know she’s asleep on her couch! And you know how her niece lives with her? I guess she runs in the morning and while I was finishing up, her and her friend lean up against one of the garage doors and I hear them talking. I was just about to open the door to leave but then she says, ‘She’s sweet but kind of a kiss-ass, right? Like a try-hard?’ And then her friend goes, ‘Yeah, she really wants to be one of them,’ ‘But all she is, is just Daryl’s little girlfriend.’” Daryl lets go to face you, his eyes incredulous just as yours were when he said someone called him ugly. “And then they started saying how I insert myself into places or something, so thought if I came out right then and they see me having done Olivia’s job for her… I didn't want them to get an up-close look of them being right. So I waited until they went in the house and then I left and for the whole rest of the week I was upset because I thought I was becoming friends with those girls but really I wasn’t, and I questioned if Rick and Michonne or Rosita or Glenn and Maggie even thought of me as a friend because they actually like me or if I’m even good enough to be one or if it’s only because I’m associated to you that they care to talk to me. I felt pathetic too.” You pause. “So, I’m really sorry, Daryl. You don’t deserve to feel like you’re being picked on in the town you live in— in the place you helped create.”
“It ain’t your fault.”
“That doesn’t make a difference. I should have said something.”
“You didn’t have to. I wanted that to happen.”
“But I wish I knew. Cause I would have if I knew. I feel like I let Michonne stop me because I didn’t understand. And all I’m saying is whether I've had it as bad as you or not, I do get it. And I’m angry for you. And you don’t have to be embarrassed to tell me things like this. It was dumb of me to keep my feelings in, just like you do with everything.”
Daryl swipes his hair to the side, parts of it are dry and waving while other areas are still wet, making him think about the rat joke. “No one likes you because of me,” he says. “You’re likable because you’re you and you care. And fuck those dumb-ass girls. They’re idiots for saying that.” He rubs your thigh. “I didn’t say anything the other day because when we were in the shower the night before I,” God, he feels stupid, “I got hard and you saw it and I realized it was the first time you saw it like that before and, I don’t know, I got scared.”
“Did you think that I’d think you’re ugly?”
“I don’t know.”
“Daryl,” you tisk, “after the amount of times we’ve showered together already?”
He gets defensive, “I don’t know! Felt different.”
“People usually get excited to know their partner is excited because of them.”
“I just feel like you’re gonna be disappointed.”
“Why do you always think that? I don’t have any expectations. I just want you to show me you love me.” You begin to look nervous, “I want to feel wanted too.”
“But I do… I do want you.”
“Then show me.”
“I don’t know how.”
You try to think, “Daryl— what is it that you picture when- when you want to do it?”
“I picture you,” he says simply.
“You do?” Your face is immediately warm.
He laughs, “Of course I do.”
“Well what do I do? Or what do you do to me?”
“Depends.”
“Pick one,” you say, almost desperately.
“Sometimes it just starts with what we always do. Kissin’. Maybe you’re on top of me.”
You waste no time; you get on top of him.
“And I press you down.” Daryl’s hands are now heavy on your hips, your hands are on his chest, you rock into him slowly.
“And sometimes I think about you bouncing on me or-” he pauses, the way you rock and the way he pushes up to you hitting a perfect spot of friction that makes the both of you gasp.
“Say it,” you tell him.
“I’m fucking you from behind. Or you're on the bottom and I’m going hard or being all gentle and shit like you but I don’t know how.”
“You know we can do all that, right?”
Daryl is red. Both you and him are surprised at yourself, but his bashfulness almost brings it out of you naturally. And honestly, your jacked and grumpy dilf boyfriend has left you repressed for far too long— you’re horny.
Suddenly, you move yourself onto one of his thighs and start palming his bulge as you rock. “Do I do this in your dreams?”
He almost groans, “Now you do.”
You move yourself from his thigh and lay down to start kissing him. He reciprocates, grabbing your face and pulling you close. Daryl starts nipping at your neck and you try your hardest not to yelp so he won’t stop. As you two continue, your slick starts to wet his boxers and you press your legs together as he gets harder under his sweatpants.
“Have you ever noticed how wet I get when we kiss?”
“Only at night,” it’s hard for his words to come out as you continue palming him, “when you don’t have clothes on.”
“And you never did anything about it?” You whine. “Do you know how bad I need you? How much I think about you?”
“I think about you more.”
“You do?
“Yes.” Daryl swallows, whimpering a little. You now stroke him, his dick riding up against his thigh, and it feels too good. “What- What do I do in your dreams?”
“You lay me on the bed and put your dick in me and fuck me and it feels amazing,” you say between hot breaths. “And you’re not scared to do it.”
“I wanna do it.”
“So, please, Daryl, do it. I want it so bad.”
Daryl uses your words as courage. He takes you off of him and goes over you.
You both take off your shirts and he strips you from his boxers and him from his sweatpants.
Finally, without regret or without him turning away you see his cock stand. It’s proud, meaty, and you can’t lie, a little scary, but you’ll never tell him, even if your widening eyes give you away. It’ll fit, you assure yourself. You won’t be afraid.
“You okay?” He asks, timidity setting in again.
But you nod assuredly. “Yes.”
“Are you sure?”
You pout, he’s stalling. “When you look at me, what do you see?”
“Beautiful.”
“And you're handsome. No pretenses. No exceptions.” You come up on your knees to face him, kissing his lips softly. “It’s like we said, we’ve dreamed about this.”
You lay down again, and Daryl places his hands on your inner thighs to spread them, making space for himself. You watch as takes hold of himself, mouth agape and pumping himself a few times as he stares at your body before slowly entering you. Your pussy is drooling at the sight.
Your eyes instantly close and scrunch. Although it worries Daryl, he’s glad you’ve shut them so he can continue looking up and down— up at your face to see if you’re in pain and down as he watches his cock enter you for the first time. You were incredibly tight to him, tighter than he ever imagined, he wasn’t used to this feeling and he liked it, a lot. It made his stomach clench and all his muscles flex as his breathing gets heavier, trying to stop the possibility of him moaning at the sight of it all.
“Are you okay?”
It was big and there was something about it that felt good but it hurt, the stretch indescribable, but you nod and tell him, “I like it,” because that was true, and everything else felt like too much to explain right now, your thoughts almost dissipating.
“You sure?”
You just nod again, whining.
“Alright,” he says, putting his hands on the bed to start.
Once more your eyes screw shut. He almost takes himself out before he pushes back into you again. He doesn’t know if he went slow enough but he tried. Your eyes wrinkling because of how hard you closed them doesn’t help though. He wants to tell you to relax but he’s not even relaxed himself to even make it sound believable.
He tries again, not going so far out this time and slowly goes back in to the hilt again, so slowly in fact he thinks that must have been awkward for you. He stops, tries one more time, then stops again. Your sounds seem like you’re hurt. He knows you’ll say it’s just pain and adjustment to his size but he instantly perceives it as disgust. He knows it’s not, but he can’t help it, he can’t. He must be ‘too much’; ‘too big,’ that’s what it is. Those are things he has heard in porn tapes Merle used to give him or things he noticed in porno mags he maybe used to read that he had found in a store near Hershel’s farm all those years ago, and supposedly it was a good thing for it to be too much, but now, look at you: you were in pain. And it was taking everything in him not to ram into you. He felt pathetic, again. Stupid, again. Like he didn’t know what he was doing. Maybe he should just withdraw right now, clean you up, try to give you a sympathetic look through his hair that said he was sorry for defiling you and not even make you feel an ounce of pleasure in the process. Everyone was right, he is a joke.
“Daryl,” you say, looking up at him, “you don’t have to keep stopping for me. I just need to relax and you just need to be slow. I think I can take it.”
“I know,” he responds, kissing your forehead.
“Close your eyes,” you tell him. “Do what feels right to you. You have to trust me to tell you if it hurts or not.”
He almost laughs at that. You think he’s so strong; that he has all the power. It’s so strange to him.
Daryl puts his head in the crux of your neck, closes his eyes, and tries again. He holds your waist, thumb on your ribs and the other fingers on your back as he pushes his hips into you.
You hug his chest and feel all of it. “Make yourself feel good Daryl, it’s gonna feel so good to me if you do that, I promise.” After his 4th small pump you let out a whiny moan of relief. “Oh- okay- keep going.”
Daryl moves his elbows to the bed by your head and starts pushing his hips against you, finding a rough yet steady rhythm. He loves the slapping sound your bodies are making and can’t help but speed up. He goes deeper and you start moaning. He already feels he’s losing himself. He tries to kiss you to slow down, but realizes he can’t plow into you the same way he just found out he likes. He goes back to it and he starts grunting and groaning— there is a part of him that is embarrassed by it but it just feels so good. “Are you gonna come?” He asks between sharp thrusts.
“Don’t focus on that,” you tell him. “Stay like this. Please.”
You didn’t have to tell him twice, he really can’t think of anything anymore than continuing to pump himself in you so he does. You try your best to rock up into him, but he has full control, his hands on your hips still as tight as ever as he pushes into you, making you and the bed bounce at his mercy.
You’re more than fine with it all. Even better, you couldn’t believe this meant that Daryl was about to come inside you. Something in you knew it was about to happen. It was the way he placed his elbows by your head and started cursing and ramming into you harder and even whimpered in your ear and gave you these little puppy kisses there before getting back to it. You were surprised by how noisy he was but you didn’t dare say a word other than panting and whining back into him so he’d continue, even in moments when it felt too much and too hard. He was forgetting all his doubts and that was the goal right now. You lock your legs around his hips and tell him, “You feel amazing inside me. My handsome man,” and that does it, “Oh, fuck,” he says as he releases every last drop of himself inside you.
Now, as he slows down, he looks at you, thumb on your bottom lip and chin as he tries his best to keep rolling his hips on you as he comes down from his high, but you ask, “Will you kiss me down there, Daryl? I’ve always wanted that.”
“You don’t want me to make you come?”
“I think it’ll happen if you do it like that. I just want to know what it feels like.”
He stops for a moment deciding if this means he’s failed or not, but he simply says, “Okay,” all kindly and nodding like it was your idea even though it was because this means another one of his dreams were coming true.
Instantly, he’s licking you, feeling more assured of what he could do— this was one of his most vivid fantasies so even though he doesn’t know for sure, he thinks he’s got.
“Oh, oh my god,” his tongue is bringing up wetness to your clit and sucking on it, “that’s good.” He starts licking your clit, going fast, “Daryl, that’s so good.”
He looks up at you, dazed already, “Yeah?”
“Oh, yes.” You fix his hair and he loves the feeling. Truly, he was going a little too fast actually, going up and down and this way and that way too much, but the sounds his mouth and your pussy were making together were too glorious. You let him go, you let him be proud, and either way, you’re whining and moaning because of it. He’s perfectly imperfect and he doesn’t even know it. But you’re too in love with the feeling of him to explain what that means right now so all you say is what he told you about yourself in the church, “I think you’re just perfect.”
To that, he stops again and he looks up at you, smiling. It’s one of those rare ones he seldom does, teeth and all, and your slick coating his lips all the while. His eyes are shining, and he gives you the smallest, sweetest, most innocent kiss to the most obscene place on your body— your clit.
At this point all your sounds have been short, quiet, filled with whines but to this, you moan at the sight, full and loud. It’s involuntary. It’s pornographic. It’s the hottest thing he’s ever heard in his life. His cock stirs, springing up again as he goes back to giving you your first and forever the most slobberiest head of your life.
After a while he beckons you from below, “Hey, angel,” he calls.
“Mm,” you respond lightly. You’re nearly blissed out. He’s going to make you come.
“I think those girls were right.”
Your eyes become so cute yet so sad— you just want him on you again. “What do you mean?”
“You are sweet. Sweetest thing I’ve ever had in my life.”
“Oh,” you whisper, moaning again as he goes back to licking your clit. “Oh. Fuck.”
He starts licking and kissing your puffy lips, making wet sounds with his tongue, slurping little bits of you where he can. He loves how slick and noisy your pretty pussy is. Your clit throbs and he hums into it all dark and grumbled and husky going, “Mmmmmm.”
You tell him, “God, it’s so good, Daryl.” To which he responds, referring to a different it, “And it’s mine.”
Oh, so he’s cocky now? Well, that’s new for him. You lay back at the thought, at the feeling, reveling in delight.
Here he is, finally.
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grimmsbride · 7 days ago
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﹡ ֗ ۪ please, baby please
LOVE FOR YOU 𝜗𝜚ྀི GRIMMS BRIDE
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₊  ✉️ | DATE NIGHT, pretty dresses and an even prettier you. Mark cant help but end the night with a little dessert..
﹡ | tags ◞  ₊  pre-established relationship | excessive use of pet names & dirty talk | reader is a bit of a tease | oral sex (f. receiving) | reader is chubby coded | mark lifts you | he likes you in heels.. | he’s a little pathetic | begging & yearning mark | ooc mark probably.. | he’s on his knees for you… literally | etc
﹡ | author’s note ◞  ₊  love writing mark like a slut, cause that’s what he is /j.. i also may do a drafts reveal but i hope you enjoy this little blurb!
Very little brought Invincible to surrender, on his knees begging for mercy or any sort of reprise for that matter. Except you. Beautiful, perfect you.
Tonight was date night, the day clear, Cecil ignoring you two— the whole nine yards. For once Mark made an effort; booking a table at the most beautiful restaurant, requesting you to wear a nice dress. Never one to disappoint, you dressed in a strapless bodycon gown, the blue highlighting your skin so beautifully— pairing the fabric with white heels.
The night was wonderful, coupled withlooks full of adoration and gentle hand grabs across the table. Mark made a promise to bring you here once again, even if it meant getting on Cecil’s bad side— a thought that caused you to giggle in the moment. Far too quickly it ended, the two of you heading home, ready to call it a night with some cuddling.
Only, that wasn’t on Mark’s mind at all. You were, every part of you. He asked you to dress pretty but he didn’t expect for you to look like this. He couldn’t count on a single hand how many times he restrained himself at the table— growing far too jealous of that spoon you kept wrapping your lips around.
So with the two of you being home, you asking so sweetly to help with your shoes; Mark saw his opportunity. He started at your shoes, gently undoing the straps and buckles, chuckling a little at your complaining.. only for his hands to rise, drifting up your thighs, pushing fabric to find more skin.
Soon enough his fingers were finding the thin strap of your thong, curling a digit around to push the underwear to the side. With zero restraint and way too much enthusiasm, the man dug his knees fully into the bedroom floor, pushing forward to press his lips against your center.
Gentle kisses, ones to hear you gasp as the feeling slowly enveloped your body. His hands smoothed up and down your legs, murmuring soft words right into your wetting sex, a mix of babbled i love yous and praises.
His tongue glided from his mouth, tickling your folds before parting them to find the bud nestled between. Darting the thick muscle up and down, round and round; fingers gripping at your plush flesh the moment you twitched. You stepped back, finding the wall for to lean against— Mark wasting no time in following you. Knees sliding across the floor, groans being muttered right into your pussy; his obsession, his yearning for you as clear as day— not a sense of shame in his body.
“Mark..” You whispered softly, hand falling to collect his hair, the wispy tresses passing through the gaps of your fingers. You trembled, eyelids falling over as his gentle yet expert tongue ran you completely wild. Of course Mark Grayson would use such an opportunity for his own selfish — was it really his? — gain. You wanted to mock him, state in full detail how much of a little pervert he was. But that would have to wait. For later, not when he had you wrapped around his little finger.
A swear dropped from your lips, gripping his hair tightly, eyebrows furrowing the moment the man drew even closer. His desperation was clear, feeling his fingers claw at your plush body, the muffled moans vibrating you each time they crawled from his throat. You couldn’t help the way you trembled as that familiar feeling drew closer, how your pussy clenched, and little button throbbed as the pleasure dragged on.
That simple thought had you moving, tugging the man away from you in one swift motion. Mark tried to fight it, attempting to push closer but you were so resilient and the man wasn’t one to stop you anyway.
Your eyes fell over his features, devouring the sight before you. His hair a mess, face slick with you and saliva, cheeks a flushed red, tie partially undone— you could come off this image alone, burning it deep into your memory.
“Why’d y—“
“I thought I… taught you patience.” You struggled to get the words out, fingers falling to press against his forehead the moment you noticed his eyes switch back between your legs. You couldn’t help but shiver at the little annoyed expression he wore, or how those once gentle hands were clenching just a bit more. “Couldn’t even let me fully undress, huh?”
“Not with how you looked the entire evening.” Mark spoke without missing a beat, glossed lips curling into the littlest simper. Coaxing hands soon treaded up and down your legs, looking up at you far too lovingly. “C’mon baby, don’t stop me.. I wanna taste you.”
“Was that not enough?”
Mark began to grumble, bordering on whining. His knees ached, his neck wasn’t at the best angle but there was no way in hell he was stopping now. Not a chance. “Fuck.. baby, please— let me finish, please..” He’s begging, lips pushing into the cutest little pout that has you keening internally. You felt that playful resistance waning the moment his lips peppered your heated skin, mumbling more soft sentences;
Please baby, please.
Need it so bad, you don’t know how much I struggled at dinner.
I know you want it just as much, [Name].. fuck.
Mark was saying all the right words, hitting every little spot in your mind. You slowly lifted your hand away from him, gasping the moment you felt Mark practically rush back to his previous position; lips wrapping around your pretty clit, sucking and licking it raw.
You whimpered softly, hips moving as the pleasure trailed back up your spine. You felt your body starting up again, shaking and shivering, clenching his hair so tightly you worried you would tear a few pieces out. Your free hand twitched against the cool wall behind you, pressing against it to hold yourself up.
The man wasn’t lying when he said he needed it, needed you; shown in his relentless actions. His tongue sliding across your sticky folds once in a while, poking at your withering hole, only to travel right back to your button to suck and lap at. His moans were even worse then before, wet declarations of pure enjoyment; unable to help himself entirely.
Soon enough you were building up again, your arousal trickling down your thighs, surely making a mess of your previously discarded panties and his pretty face. With a sudden rather powerful suck your knees were buckling, a moan thrumming through your throat quickly.
Mark wasted no time, hands sliding underneath your legs to lift you up easily, rising to his own as if you weighed nothing. His lips never stopped its rhythm, maybe even intensifying as his excitement shined through. His fingers caressed, pressing you up against the wall so you wouldn’t even think of escaping.
As his name fell from your lips the man couldn’t help but groan back, eyes flickering open to land onto your face. Your eyebrows were creased, lips quivering, and hands holding onto him for dear life. He couldn’t help the downright pussy drunk chuckle that vibrated right into you, his hold tightening.
“So fucking perfect… how’d I get so lucky..?” Mark mumbled to himself, a sweet little mantra that had stars invading your already blurry vision. Your stomach clenched, kneeling forward as your body shook against the wall, only able to cling to the man, letting him do what wanted completely.
All too quickly you were coming undone, arching as your legs wrapped around his neck tightly, Mark pressing against your thighs as if wanting you to squeeze him more. Moments of gentle licks passed, the man sucking up every drop of your arousal as if it was the sweetest nectar one could drink. His thumbs glided across your skin, soothing your withering body, helping you down your high slowly.
When fully satisfied Mark pulled away, gently sliding you down the wall to guide your legs around his waist. His arms snaked around your own, pushing close to stamp a wet kiss against your neck.
“When will you wear this dress again?” The man murmured into your skin, smiling a bit at the little giggle that escaped you. He shivered as your hands dragged up his arms, gliding to his hair to simply rake against his scalp.
“I don’t know.. will you let me actually take it off to wash?”
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slutofpsh · 8 months ago
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strip for me.
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part six | pjs.
pairings: hyungline x reader
synopsis: hyung line got you trapped in a situation that you can’t get away from.
wc: 8k.
warnings: smut, minors dni, fivesome, bullying (not promoting violence or bullying), degrading, raw sex (please use protection), dirty talks, curses, masturbation, hyung line being mean. having small sips of champagne. this is not proof read.
note: finally finished jay’s solo part. i really enjoyed writing this one as he is really my comfort person in this group. he just strikes me as someone very reliable. also get well soon, our jay! jake’s part will be the next one. i’ll probably need more time for that part since he’s a very hyper member (i mean it in a very affectionate way). anyway, as usual reblogs and replies are highly encouraged. i really appreciate all of your nice feedbacks!
part one; two; three; four; five
slutofpsh 2024 © all rights reserved.
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“y/n, please pick up that dress i ordered for you later.” your head whips to look over your shoulder.
a small smile spreads across your face before nodding once, “okay, mom! see you later.” and you leans in to give her a kiss on her cheeks.
as you head outside, you couldn’t help but to feel excited. nerves wrecking and mind wondering of how this day will go. it was two days after your ‘date’ with one of your boyfriends, lee heeseung. and now, its park jongseong.
speaking of, he’s already outside. his red chevy camero parked while he’s leaning on it. patiently waiting for you. his eyes brightens the moment you walked out from the door.
“good morning!” he smiles bigger as he watch how cute your way of walking towards him.
“good morning, baby.” he greets softly and naturally sliding his arms over your waist, tugging you closer.
“were you waiting for long?” you asks a little bit worried.
jay’s eyes are so focused on you, gently watching you carefully. he shakes his head with a soft smile.
“nah.” he says.
only, he was there waiting for over an hour. he wasn’t going to tell you that, knowing so well that it would make you feel bad. he doesn’t want that.
after staring at each other for a while, he guided you over his car, opening the door for you. it was such a sweet gesture that you’re kind of getting used to. the boys always does it for you these days.
“jake’s texting me.” you informed with a bright smile while tapping on your phone to reply.
jay smirks, arms flexing as he manoeuvred the steering wheel. “is he still sulky about yesterday?” he asks that made you giggle a bit.
yesterday, the five of you went to eat dinner at heeseung’s favourite restaurant. it was a very fun time. you spent it just talking about random things, the boys basically exposing their embarrassing past memories to you that made you feel even much closer to them.
in the end, after the dinner someone has to drive you home and they just started to bicker with each other. it slightly stressed you out why they’re making it such a big deal. the banters lasts until you came up with the idea of settling it through rock paper and scissors. you’re laughing the whole duration that they’re playing.
jay won and jake, as always, is sulky. saying that he gets to pick you up today and should automatically be disqualified on driving you home last night.
“a little.” and you made sure you decorate your message with heart emojis just so he wouldn’t be so upset about last night.
he snorted, “he’s so immature.”
you giggled, can’t help but to inwardly agrees. tho, you must also admit that you love this side of jake sim. he’s just so adorable.
“so what’s the plan later?”
the original plan was to not ask anything about the date with jay that you’ve been looking forward to. but you just can’t help yourself.
the date with heeseung just improves so much with your relationship with him and just drawn you both closer. to the point that you don’t feel that nervous around him anymore. you can hold a staring contest for more than 15 seconds now (before it only last for 5 seconds).
jay smiles, knowing that you feel excited to your date just makes his heart jump in joy. since they did talked about how to make it up to you, jay gave deep thoughts about it. he’s very determined about giving his best—if not his all, just to make you feel how he feels towards you.
“its a secret.” and he grins that made you pout.
he glanced and chuckles at how adorable you look. he gently pinches your chin then put his focus back on the road. it was a chill ride and he was so entertaining to talk to. jay’s the type of person who knows alot of things and so you’re learning while chatting with him.
as his car drives over the parking lot, familiar vehicles in the same spot can be seen by you. they’re busy goofing around, but once sunghoon spots jay’s familiar vehicle, he pushed himself off his motorcycle.
jake’s head whips in flash and a big smile automatically spreads across his face. heeseung’s just have a small smile over his lips while leaning over his car, watching carefully. you chuckled, never really getting tired of this scene.
you rolled down the window even before jay can finish parking to wave at the three boys. jake instantly waves back, full of energy.
“sweets!” he greets and even rushed over to your side like an excited puppy.
“calm down, dude! you’ll get drag by my car.” jay hissed while still trying his best to focus on parking.
once rest assured that its safe to open the car’s door, jake didn’t waste any time and bursted it open. jay just rolls his eyes before unclasping your seatbelt for you.
sunghoon smirks while opening the backseat to get your things for you while you’re busy greeting his friends. heeseung trudges closer and almost pushed jake’s clingy ass off.
“hey, angel.” he softly greets then caged you in a tight, warm embrace. he drops a kiss on top of your head then leans his cheeks on it.
“hi, hee.” you says while face pressed on his chest, inhaling his manly scent that you’re slowly getting addicted to.
“jay hits the jackpot, eh? he drove you home last night and then he gets to pick you up today.” he mumbled so lowly, like as if he doesn’t want his friends to hear him sulking.
you chuckled, “that’s fine.” and caress his back carefully.
he smiles, enjoying your warmth. he gave you one last squeeze before leaning away to give you a peck on the lips.
once heeseung’s body moves away from you, sunghoon approaches. his eyes darted at you. he looked so good even in the morning. you gulped, admiring him.
“hi, pretty.” he whispers as he tugs your body closer to his.
pretty? he’s the pretty one for your eyes. the way his black hair compliments his pale skin, thick brows and eyelashes around his pretty eyes, pointy nose with a mole, and natural red lips. kissable lips that you get to kiss whenever you like.
“hi, hoonie.” you mumble affectionately that tugs sunghoon’s heart strings.
there’s really something with the way you say his name. he will never get tired of it. he should really record it and put it as his alarm. or use it whenever he’s losing his cool. it could put into a good use. maybe when he’s masturbating too? he smirks inwardly.
he leans in for his kiss with a playful evil grin on his handsome face. you return his kiss without any clue of the dirty things that occupies his mind.
“its really so unfair that you’d get to drive her home last night and you picked her up today.” jake’s still sulky while you walk over to the class.
as usual, heeseung and sunghoon’s in front towering the three of you. jay and jake’s beside you chatting and bickering from time to time.
“sweets do you like (favorite food)?” jake asks once you’ve settled on your seat.
despite the random question, you gave him a nod. his face brightens like it was such a big relief. jay drags one chair to sit next to you while heeseung went in front to check the workbooks that needed to be submitted. sunghoon went to his seat and laid his head after he placed your things beside you.
“what do you plan on your date?” jay asked his friend who quickly knew that he’s asking these questions because of his plan.
jake’s face looked defensive, “that’s none of your business! don’t copy me.” he hissed at his friend.
that made you laugh and jay only frowned at him. “i already planned our day. i don’t need your lame ideas.” he fired back.
jake cocked one of his brow at his friend, “lame? you’re lame!” and even playfully swat his arm then tries to escape after sending you a flying kiss.
you laughed hard at jake’s cuteness and how they bicker around. jay was left beside you as he flips his friend who just showed him his tongue from his seat.
“he’s so immature.” he complains while shaking his head.
you watch him with a smile, admiring how he’s so patient around his friends. jay is very matured. he rarely shows emotions or big reactions that makes him almost a nonchalant person. but lately, you’ve noticed how he tries to change that towards you.
you can clearly see he’s not that comfortable showing his true emotions. making you feel worried how he’s very cautious about letting people know his fears or weaknesses. he has a strong persona. some people even think he doesn’t have any weak side.
“he’s being cute.” and you reaches over his arm to caress it, a way of saying he’s being so nice.
jay’s eyes drops over your hand and smiles before grabbing it to kiss it once.
“nah, he’s just being annoying.”
you chuckled, “anyway, i have to pick up a dress later. is that okay?” you remembered your mom’s reminders before you stepped out from your house.
jay nods without hesitation. “yeah, sure. we can go pick it up later before we head to my condo.” he says.
you nods and tilts your head. “so we’ll date at your condo?” you ask with curiousity.
jay licks his lips, feeling a little nervous that you may actually find it boring or unclassy. his hyung just took you to their vacation house.
“y-yeah,” then he clears his throat. “is that okay with you?”
your eyes stares at his and nodded without hesitation. no sign of disappointment or anything. just genuine curiosity and a hint of excitement. he always knew you aren’t judgemental, but it still surprises him sometimes.
“what will we do at your place?” you tried your luck of harvesting information.
he smirks, caught on right away. he pinches your cheeks once before standing up to go to his proper seat.
“nice try, baby.” then he drops a quick kiss on top of your head.
a pout made its way to your lips while watching his broad back leaving. you’re totally curious, just like how it was when its your date with heeseung. you smile inwardly then shrugs shoulder before fishing the textbook you’ll be needing for the class.
guess you just need to leave it up to him. besides, you bet you’ll enjoy the day.
the class started once the teacher steps inside the room. naturally, you’re focus falls completely on to the lessons. lately, you find yourself enjoying class even more. maybe because you don’t feel alone anymore. tho, back then they’re really there for you. but their affection truly gave a bigger impact of comfort.
two periods passes like a blur and you’re stretching your arms when jay calls your attention.
“hey.” he says as he leans over, placing one of his hand on your table then the other at the back of your chair, trapping you.
the position itself was enough to send butterflies go crazy inside your stomach. he smiles then stares hardly on your eyes.
“y-yeah?”
“can you help me take those workbooks at the student council office?” he asks casually then pointed at the teacher’s table using his chin.
you glanced at it once then agreed with no hesitation. he nods then started heading towards the table. you followed afterwards. some of your classmates are starting to goof around as it was your vacant period.
“you can carry that.” he’s referring to the fewer stacks of workbooks. it sure does not compare to what he would carry.
“that’s too many. i can handle more than this.” you said, worried that he will have a hard time carrying those.
he shakes his head, declining.
“i can handle this, baby. besides, its just an alibi.” he smugly chuckle before tilting his head, asking you to follow him outside.
your stomach churns after realizing that he didn’t asked for your help because he needs it. its for other reason.
before heading outside, your eyes automatically scanned the room for the other three boys. their eyes are already darted at your direction, like as if they’ve been watching you ever since you stood up.
jake has a pout on his lips. sunghoon’s eyes are piercing as always, but he smirks once met eyes with you. he even made a playful kiss gesture before winking that made you blush. heeseung’s just watching using his soft gaze, only available for you.
“baby.” jay softly calls out.
that snapped you back in your senses then continued following him. on the way to the office, jay initiated conversation that made you feel at ease. not that you’re uncomfy around him, its just knowing that he’s planning to do something at the office makes you feel things.
the scenario at the library with heeseung flashes back to your mind, making you flustered and wet at the same time. your heart thumped in so much anticipation. a little bit scared... but more on excited.
“after you.” he smiles gently while prompting you to walk inside before him. his gentlemen gesture made you blush so hard, unable to even utter a simple thanks.
the whole office is as expected, vacant. jay walks pass you after locking the door behind him. he glanced at you while you silently roam your eyes around. the look on your face made jay smirk a little. it reflects a kitten scared for her life. very cute.
“you can place that here.” he says and puts the workbooks he was holding at the table.
you nodded then trudges towards him to place it near his stacks. his eyes carefully follows your every movement and you can feel his burning eyes, making you feel more nervous.
“are you nervous?” jay reaches for your hand then caress it. his eyes stays at you.
a pout made its way to your lips, “a little.” you admit that made his grin grew wider.
“yeah? why is that?” he asks teasingly then tugs your body close to his.
your brows furrowed and lips pursed, “because of you.”
jay’s very satisfied to hear that from you. the fact that you look very adorable and that he’s the reason of it makes his head go fuzzy. his heart aches in so much delight. he wraps his arms around your body and lets you rest your head on his chest, him nuzzling you close.
“you don’t have to feel nervous.” he says and gulped. its making him even more excited.
“i will always feel nervous around you.”
“is that suppose to be a good thing?” he chuckles.
your arms slides over his waist, “yeah.” a heavy sigh escapes from your lips before you continued. “i feel safe with you, but you can also make me feel nervous.” you admits then slowly pulls off from his warm hug.
he lets you, but kept his hand on the small of your back. his eyes darted at you.
“its because you look so handsome all the time.” you complimented him. well, its true. all of them are incredibly good looking, its just out of all those four boys, jay seems to be the one who needs to hear it the most.
you’ve noticed how he never flaunt how handsome he is and you remembered that one time where jake said that he rarely take photos as he doesn’t like seeing his face. that’s actually the most non-sense you’ve heard that time. how can he not like seeing that kind of face?
you figured you need to do extra effort on complimenting jay, try to help him realize how beautiful he is for your eyes— and probably to almost everybody around.
“baby...” jay’s out of words. you totally caught him off-guard and you’re happy about it. feeling proud even.
“what? i’m just stating a fact.” with a small smile on your pretty face.
jay’s heart strings tugs. he knew he likes every bits of you, but its still amazing how you manage to still make him feel things like this. at some point he thinks that you have some sort of magic spell and they’re all under it. he’s not complaining tho.
he leans in for a very soft kiss. you’ve felt every emotions he’s having at the moment.
when he pulls away, your eyes looked hazy and lips a little more red after the kiss. he smirks then caress your cheeks carefully. the two of you stares at each other’s eyes for a while before he talked again.
“take off your panties and sit down on the sofa.” he instructs that made your heart thump and stomach churn.
he didn’t have to even repeat himself. he guides you and you obeyed without any complain. the very familiar sofa causes so much memories to flashback and you just can’t help but to blush.
he made you sat down and just like he requested, you reached for your underwear and slides it off. he watches carefully while positioning himself in front, his eyes totally fixed at it. he licks his lips, almost salivating at the view.
“i want to taste your sweetness.” he mumbles after you manage to take your panties off.
he naturally placed both of his hands on your thighs and spread it open for him. the sight of your wet core made him even more thirstier. he can’t remember anything that can make him arouse like how the way you do it.
his eyes shifts at you and leans forward for a quick kiss. after liplocking for a few seconds, he pulls away then dips his head to start eating you out.
first lick on your slit and you’re already a whole mess. gasping lightly, your one hand flew over to your mouth trying not to make so much noise.
“damn, that’s good.” jay mumbles and then started eating you out. his lips attached to your core. he’s licking, sucking it. making sure he left no part of it that his tongue touched. he’s so addicted.
he looks at you over his eyelashes and his heart felt proud seeing you eyes tight shut, lip caught in between your teeth and head pans left and right.
“look at me, baby.” he says shortly that made you pry your eyes open. it was a bit hard as the pleasure’s keeping you from doing it easily.
“watch while i eat you out so good.” he added before diving in to eat you so hard like it was his last meal in his life.
feeling his tongue and lips attached at your core felt so good, having to watch as he does it makes you go crazy. it was a sight to see and the pleasure he gives just adds to the intensity of the situation.
“oh jay...” you moaned that he answered with a hum, the vibration it made threw your head back. your eyes slightly rolled at the back of your head. he taps your thighs, indicating that he wants your eyes back at him and so you obliged.
jay saw how hard your teeth are sunk into your beautiful lips and the way you clenched hardly around his tongue indicates that you are close to release his long awaited sweet juice. he raised one of his hand then slides two fingers with no warning. it made you jolt and moan in pleasure.
“are you close, baby?” he asks so softly. contradicting to his tone is his evil sexy smirk while watching carefully how your face contorts.
you nodded eagerly that made him chuckle, “give it to me then.” he says as he rut his fingers inside you in a faster pace.
“ugh,” you whimpered and watch how he laid his tongue near your hole, making sure it touches perfectly so he can catch every bit of your release.
the sight was enough for you to cum. it was so sensual and jay looked so hot doing it. jay continued to fuck you with his fingers despite after cumming and shaking a bit because of it.
“j-jay...” you moaned and shut your eyes close, unable to handle the pleasure and being stimulated by it.
he teared his gaze off from you and focused on your pulsating pussy. he pulled his fingers off then licks it off clean before attaching his lips on your hole to suck all those juices off.
“oh my gosh..” you moaned, back arching a little and eyes cracking open in surprise. the feeling was undescribably good.
jay’s wiping off some remnance on the corner of his lips before he smiles lovingly at you. he loves your fucked out state, still in trance of how good he just made you feel. he gently grabs your hand and caress it before taking it to his lips, kissing it affectionately.
“was that good?” he asked even though your face was enough to let him know that you indeed enjoyed every bit of it.
a nod is all you could give him as you’re still high from your climax. he chuckles and kissed your inner thigh once before standing up to collect some tissues to clean you.
“glad to make up from the last time.” he mumbled, referring to when he refused you the release you’ve been anticipating. back when he’s still punishing you.
a small smile and a light chuckle escapes your lips, “that was worth it.” you commented that earned a wide grin from the handsome boy now leaning down to start cleaning his girlfriend’s sweet pussy.
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“jay is really my most hated person at the moment.” jake commented as he walks beside you over the parking lot.
the two of you are hand in hand while the three other boys are behind, talking about this topic you couldn’t even relate to. jake’s not that sulky anymore, but his jealous ass can’t help but to be upset over his friend.
you caress his warm hands wrapped on yours, “oh come on, i know you love him.” the teasing smile on your face made jake giddy inside. he can’t explain how happy he is now that you’ve grown closer to all of them. comfortable enough to tease him like this.
he smirks, leaning his face closer. “not as much as i love you, sweets.” and with no warning he attached his lips on yours.
the kiss made your heart leap. after a couple of seconds he pulls away with a smile.
“i’ll see you tomorrow, yeah?” he lifts his other hand to pinch your cheeks lightly as you nod your head.
“take care of her, jay.” jake says with a playful glare on his face.
sunghoon’s smirking as he silently approach you to give you a kiss on your lips. he mumbled a short good bye before placing your things on jay’s car.
“you don’t even have to remind me.” jay snobbishly says at his friend.
heeseung shakes his head, a bit fed up to their banters. his eyes shifts to you and they soften instantly. he smiles before leaning to kiss you on your forehead then to your lips.
“i love you,” he mumbles then rests his forehead on yours. “have fun tonight for me.”
you nodded, cheeks blushing hard. “i love you too, hee.”
his heart beats in content and leans away. he gave jay a clap on his shoulder before waving to go approach his own car.
jake’s still there, shooting glares to his friend. jay snorted as he slid his arms over your waist.
“dude why can’t you just be normal like heeseung hyung and sunghoon? they just bid good bye and left.” jay commented.
jake rolls his eyes then focuses back on you.
“i love you, sweets. text me whenever you have time or if you got bored with jay.” he jokes, tho he knew you wouldn’t feel that way. his friend is not a boring person and he knew you’ll have a great time with him. its just his way of teasing him.
you chuckled, finding it totally funny. jay swats his friend’s arm.
“you’re so clingy!”
jake just stuck his tongue out before finally walking off. jay sighs and faced you, “he’s so annoying.”
he then opened the car’s door for you.
“he won’t be jake if he don’t tease you guys.” you stated before getting in his car. he carefully secured your spot before he smiles.
“you’re right.” then he closes your door to go around and ride the driver’s seat.
“where’s the store again, baby?” he asks while buckling his seatbelt.
you quickly pulls your phone to check your mom’s message. she texted you about the dress she’s saying a while ago. you told him the name and location of the store. he nods his head and started driving right away.
he lets you connect to the bluetooth of the car for music. a subtle music plays while both of you talks to each other. it was such a chill ride, laughing and teasing each other.
as you arrive at the store, jay parked perfectly and went out to open the door for you. he placed his hand at the small of your back while guiding you inside.
“hi, welcome!” the lady by the counter greets you with a big smile.
“hello, i’m here to pick up a dress.” you gave her the slip that your mom gave you to claim it.
she nods and even ask you to wait. you glanced over jay whose roaming his eyes around the store filled with beautiful dresses. you smiled and leans closer to his body. you felt his hand caress your back as he rest his head on yours.
“what’s the dress for?” he asks.
you pursed your lips at his question, “its for her friend’s birthday party. she’s taking me with her.” then pulls away to look at him.
he stares at your eyes then smiles, “hmm. okay.” and kisses your nose gently.
your heads whipped at the lady when she finally got the dress. it was on your favorite color and looked so cute.
“do you want to try it so we’ll know if the adjustments are perfect?”
“can i?” you asked jay.
he nods without hesitation. “yeah, definitely.”
you nodded and one of the staff guided you inside their hallway where their stalls are located. jay said he’ll be perfectly fine so you don’t have to worry and take your time.
the dress looked good on you. the color compliments you perfectly and the style just fits you. you can’t help but to thank your mom for understanding your style.
“is it good?” the lady at the entrance of the fitting room smiles warmly, admiring how good you look.
you nodded your head, pleased. “yes, thank you so much. its perfect.”
a big satisfied smile spread across her face. “glad you liked it.”
she left you to change back to your original clothes and after that you went to the counter to sign something. she handed you the paper bag and thanked you as you head outside.
jay’s by his car, leaning attractively. you noticed some people craning their necks just to look at the handsome boy. it boost something in you while watching him staring at you with a warm smile. to have all his attention focused on you despite some eyes fixated on him.
“all done, baby?” he asks and hand already reaching for your waist as you approach him.
you nodded and even raised the paperbag.
he smirks then kisses your cheeks as he grab the paperbag from you.
“i have something for you.” he stated that made you look at him with full curiosity.
“what is it?”
he opens the backseat and placed your paperbag inside then he pulls out a beautiful bouquet of flowers. your lips gaps at the sight of it.
“w-what...” you gulped then accept it from him.
“you liked it?” and arms wrapped around your waist once again.
“yes.” and pouts. “what’s it for?”
he tilts his head with a slight furrowed brows. “do i need a reason to give flowers to my beautiful girlfriend?”
that made you blush hard. stomach turning and heart thumping fast, reacting for jay. it was like an automatic response already. to even think that he tugs your heartstrings like how heeseung does is unbelievable.
“thank you so much.” you mumbles cutely that made jay melt.
“anything for you.” and he placed a gentle kiss at your forehead.
the whole ride to his condo unit, you got your eyes fixated at your flowers. he can’t help but to feel proud of it. if this is how you’ll react every time you receive flowers then he will gladly give you all the flowers in the world.
after a few minutes, you noticed that you’re driving inside a very expensive and private condo building. the security itself is tight, but once the guards saw jay’s familiar car they let him through easily.
your mouth gaps while looking around the tall fancy buildings.
“you live here?” you couldn’t help but ask.
he chuckles finding you adorable. “yeah.” he casually said.
you knew that the boys are wealthy. mainly why you’re aware that they get away from their troubles too easily.
“all alone?” your question caught him slightly off-guard.
heeseung lives with his parents and older brother. you’ve been in their house a couple of times. tho you didn’t meet his parents yet, you remembered him mentioning that he lives with him.
jake also lives with his parents. you’ve been in his house once. you met his mom and she’s very sweet.
sunghoon’s house is the nearest to the school. around an expensive private neighborhood. you’ve heard rumors about their million dollar mansion.
“yeah.” jay says. he doesn’t seem sad about it, but you can’t help but to be worried by thinking that he’s alone here.
jay glanced at you and chuckles when he saw how you look at him with so much worry.
“its fine, baby. my mom got that condo for me since our main house is far from the city. she doesn’t want me driving that long all the time.” he comforts you, reaching his hand on you to caress your thighs for consoling.
“don’t you feel lonely?” you ask, still worried.
he shakes his head right away to assure you. he’s also not lying about it. he doesn’t feel lonely at all and he actually like living independently.
“besides, heeseung hyung have a unit at the same floor as mine. he sleeps their from time to time.” he assures you.
“okay.” and finally smiles.
he chuckles, “you can come visit me too, you know?” with a smirk.
that made you blush, but you try to conceal it with playful glares shooting right at him.
“are you kidding? the security is so tight. i doubt i’ll manage to go through it.”
he scoffs, “i’ll let them know that you’re my girlfriend.” he winks that made you roll your eyes.
“you’re so cute.” he commented and finally started parking his car.
after he manages to park, he went out of the car as you patiently wait for him to open the door. he grabs some of your things at the backseat using one of his hand. the other reaches for yours and the two of you walks over the elevator hand in hand.
jay’s condo unit looks so cozy. just by one look you can already tell he picked all the things. it screams so much like him, fits him perfectly.
“make yourself feel at home, baby.” he says.
you slowly walked over the big glass wall to look at the beautiful view in front. the city looks incredibly relaxing. all the cars driving and people walking that looked like toys from the height of his condo unit is amusing.
“hey,” he approaches and caged you in a back hug.
your hand rests at his arms wrapped around you.
“go to my room and change into this.” and he pulls away to hand you a paper bag that has a logo of a very expensive brand.
“what...”
he smiles, “i’ll cook for us then we’ll have dinner at my balcony. sounds good?”
your eyes stares at him and you can’t help but to feel so overwhelmed at how romantic this man is. you nodded your head and accept the paperbag with a clouded mind.
he smirks, “great.” then placed a kiss on your head.
“take your time getting ready. i also asked someone to buy some make up products for you.” he raised a hand and scratch the back of his head, looking a bit shy.
“i’m n-not sure if you use those brands, but—” you threw yourself at him for a tight hug to let him know how much you appreciate his efforts for this.
“thank you so much, jay.”
he melts into your hug and returns it. “no problem, baby.”
you two stayed like that for a few more seconds before you headed to his room and he went to the kitchen to start preparing for the dinner. your heart felt so full just by hearing that he will cook for you.
jay’s really sweet. he got you flowers and this dress. also the make up. you can’t believe he will be this considerate.
his room looks neat. a few guitars displayed at the corner. some liquor bottles at a cabinet. a few pictures that you checked. one with his parents and another one with his friends. they’re all smiling so wide at the picture.
another picture is also the four of them, but it was a younger version of them. they all looked adorable and despite knowing that they have a strong bond, you can’t help but to notice how obvious the difference between their personalities.
heeseung have this small smile, hair fixed perfectly. jake’s smiling so widely and even holds a peace sign by one of his hand. sunghoon’s not smiling at the camera and have one of his eyebrows raised. he looked so snobby. jay have this warm smile that indicates how happy he is while having his friends beside him.
you heard out of all the four, he’s the only one who doesn’t have a sibling. a part of you felt sad for it, because you knew it yourself. you know how it feels having no one to play with and talk to. yes, you have your mom but there are things you cannot share with her. sometimes, you wished you have a sibling.
thankfully jay found it with his friends. a smile spreads on your face while caressing the picture of them using your thumb.
you spent almost two hours preparing for this dinner. a few moments after, you heard a faint knock at jay’s door.
“come in.” you mumbled and soon the door creaks open, revealing jay.
your mouth gaps at how good he looks. he’s wearing this semi formal outfit just to fit the vibe of your dress.
“wow.” he mumbles, eyes fixed at you. his eyes flickers with so much adoration. he always think you are pretty and when he saw that dress, he already know it will look good on you. but now that you’re wearing it, its a different thing.
he walks closer towards you with careful steps. taking time to appreciate how gorgeous you are. it made you blush and makes your heart warm. jay just never fails to make you feel like you’re the prettiest person alive.
“you look breath-taking.” he sincerely said and rests both of his hands on your hips, fingers slightly digging on the skin. he can’t help but to get excited about it.
you giggled and wrapped your arms over his nape. “you look so good too.”
he smiles and leans in for a gentle kiss on your cheeks. “but not as good as you.”
after both of you got satisfied on admiring each other, jay guided you outside the room. he blindfolds your eyes saying he wanted to surprise you with the set up he made himself.
its not very grand, (it is) but still he made effort. regardless, you’re sure you will love it. just how he prepares everything, you’re already more than thankful.
“oh my gosh...” both of your hands flew in your mouth in amusement.
a trail of red roses are made towards his balcondy where a simple yet elegant table was set up for your date. it was perfect.
he laid his hand in front of you with a handsome smile. satisfied with how you reacted. he was thrilled, almost a little nervous, as to how you will take this dinner thing. thankfully, you looked happy about it. with slight tears of joy brimming your eyes, he knew he did a good job.
the two of you walks towards the dinner table and he even pulled a chair for you.
“thank you.” you can’t stop smiling as he sat in front then takes care of you.
he told you the dishes he prepared for tonight and the pure amusement in your eyes didn’t slip off from jay’s eyes.
“you cooked this?” amazed at how it looked like something that will be served at a five star restaurant.
he nods his head, very proud. he tilts his head and asked you to take a bite. just how the meat melts in your mouth is perfect. you aren’t even exaggerating, but it taste so good.
“its perfect, jay! you’re such a good cook!” you exclaimed that made jay smile even bigger. his palm rests on top of chest.
“i’m glad you liked it baby.”
he pours you a glass of champagne. “are we even allowed to...?” your words halts referring to the alcohol when you’re just on your senior highschool.
he laughs, “its fine. just a glass of it won’t hurt.” he assures you.
you nodded, a little excited about it. he saw that and chuckles.
“but make sure not to drink too much baby. i don’t want to take you home drunk. i will be on your mom’s bad side. we don’t want that, do we?”
you laughed lightly and nodded.
the night went on with just the two of you talking about random stuff. he will ask you things he was curious of you and you’ll do the same thing. as the conversation went on and on, you find yourself feeling more comfortable around jay.
“when did you start liking me, jay?” you suddenly asked after remembering heeseung sharing this cute information as to how it all started for him.
somehow it made you curious for the other boy’s version.
jay’s not caught off-guard about it. well, maybe a little but not too much. he sighs and eyes dropped at his almost finished meal. he tilts his head, one hand plays through his wine glass.
“honestly, i was actually a little annoyed at you before.” he revealed with a chuckle.
you instantly got your brows furrowed at this new acquired information.
“what? why?” curious.
he laughs, finding it funny. finding his old self funny for it.
“because of how down bad you got my friends on you.” he started. he stops for a while then let out a sigh.
“i was the last one to discover these feelings for you. i guess its safe to say i was the most denial.” he clicks his tongue. “like i said, i’m kind of annoyed at you.”
your lips pursed, listening attentively.
“i transferred to our school when we’re on nineth grade, remember?” he says and you nodded your head.
jay doesn’t go to your current school before. since his home is far from here, he used to attend somewhere near his house. but he transferred because he wanted to be with his friends. you still remember clearly how the girls in your class went crazy for the new guy, park jongseong.
he was the talk of the whole campus for weeks. saying how perfect he is and how his group of friends are just a bunch of visuals. well, you couldn’t disagree with that.
“even before i can move here, they’re already been talking about this girl nonstop.” he started again then eyes focused on you. “they talk about you like you’re the only girl in the campus.”
your heart thumped faster at what he said.
“i was annoyed because at some point, they don’t give enough attention to my transfer to the school. all they can tell me is how amazing you are.” he chuckles. “out of curiosity and also irritation, i started to watch you from a far just like them. i was convincing myself that i will find something that can make my friends realize that you aren’t that special.” he couldn’t help but to smirk.
“but i just found myself drawn towards you. suddenly i’m not watching you for the main reason i started it. suddenly its because i was caught up, and just like them i fell...” his hand reached over and fingers plays carefully with yours. “and fell continuously until i cannot rise from this feelings anymore.”
your eyes softens and fingers hold his tightly.
“instead of finding reasons for them to unlike you, i found the reasons why they like you so much, baby.”
you pout and eyes watered with so much affection. heart felt so full because of the things he just said. you can’t believe it. jay, despite being the one whose been a little more nicer out of all of them, still felt distant before. his nonchalant demeanour made you think he don’t like you as much as the others. turns out you’re wrong.
“i love you, baby.”
you sniffs and stood up from your chair to approach him. he moves his chair back a little to give you space and let you sit at his lap comfortably.
you wrapped your arms around his neck and buried your face on the side of his face.
“i love you.” you mumble so gently that knocks out the air out of jay’s heart.
to hear those words straight out from your mouth has a different effect on him. he was at awe for a moment before he finally pulls himself back to his senses. he made you face him and cupped your face affectionately.
“you’re very special to me, y/n. i may not be as expressive as the others as i am afraid to show my vulnerability, but please always remember that i am so soft for you. you are my soft spot.” he said while staring right into your eyes.
“please never forget that.”
you caress his cheeks, “i know how strong of a person you are, jay. but always know that showing weakness doesn’t mean you are not strong. you are a human after all. for me, you’re a very wonderful person.” and with that he leans in for a heated kiss.
his kisses are intense and so is how his hand rests on your face. your eyes shut and just enjoys this moment with jay, hand rests over his shoulder. his open mouthed kiss moves from your lips to your chin, then down to your neck.
“jay..” you moaned.
“i want to fuck you here.” he mumbles that instantly sent your mind afar. you are loss and too caught up in the moment that you barely give a care if his balcony is wide open and free for people to see.
“please...” you mumble that made jay go crazy.
“stand up and lean on the railings.” he instructed that you obliged right away.
your breaths are heavy while you wait full anticipation for jay to get in touch with you once again. the view beneath his balcony is very pretty and honestly add to the feels. you’re too turned on and the arousal is already poisining your right mind to think about anything but jay’s dick.
not long after, his toned chest are pressed on your back. he dips his head and kisses your exposed shoulder blades towards your neck.
“you’re so beautiful.” he compliments as one of his hand rummages to pull your dress up so he can fuck you from the back. “so damn beautiful.” he added then slides your panties to the side.
he has his zipper open and his cock pulled outside, so hard and ready for you. he licks his fingers then strokes his dick a few times before placing the starts trailing your line.
“lets get you wet enough first, hm?” he softly whispered, lips kissing you on your ears.
you whimpered and hand rests at his thigh behind you.
“i don’t want my baby hurting from my big dick.” he chuckles and kept on tracing the line. his dirty words were enough to get you dripping wet for him.
“jay...” you said, out of breath even if you aren’t doing anything.
he chuckles, finding you adorable. “all right, i’m coming in baby.” he whispered then slowly put his cock inside of you.
the stretch made you moan out and whimper softly. once he managed to put it fully, he tries to make you face him.
“give me a kiss.” he demanded that you gave in. the kiss was slightly messy, but you didn’t care.
he asked you to hold on the railings as he started to fuck into you, his large hands dominates your hips. he started slow, enjoying how tight you felt around his cock. but the pleasure it was giving him made it impossible not to go faster.
he started rutting his cock in a faster pace that felt delicious. he groans as he peppered your back with light soft kisses. it was affectionate and honestly started to drive you crazy.
“ugh,” you moaned heavenly at the intensity of how jay’s fucking you at the moment.
his thick cock just slides in and out of you, reaching the parts of your insides that’s been longing for him. one of your hand hold his arm for support as you can feel your knees weakening from too much pleasure.
the breeze are slightly cold but the heat coming from both of your bodies are enough to keep you warm.
“oh my gosh... so good.” you mumble as your eyes rolls at the back of your head. jay’s brows are furrowed as he looks down on your privates connecting. the erotic sounds of your skins slapping making him feel alot of things, arousal being on top of it.
“yeah baby. you’re right.” he says. “you feel so damn good around me.” and he started fucking faster and deeper.
it was so intense and not surprising that you’re reaching your climax already. the familiar knot forming inside your stomach causes you to clench around jay’s throbbing dick. it sends instant pleasure for him, making him groan and moan. he sounded so sexy.
“cumming for me?”
you nodded your head, lips caught in between your teeth.
“me too, baby. i’m close too.” he then continued trying to drive both of you to reach that release.
you came undone to jay’s dick and is a moaning mess after it. he groans heavily and kept on fucking his hot seeds back inside your tight hole.
he made your head turn to face him for a messy kiss, giggling and chuckling in between while still helping both of you in riding your high.
“i love you so much.” he says, connecting your foreheads together.
you managed to pull a small smile, despite being drunk in lust over the climax you just reached. “i love you, jay.” and with that he leans for a peck before smirking.
“let me fuck you on the couch too.” and then started guiding you inside his dim lit condo. the only source of light are from the bright moon and some from the building next to his.
he sat down and helped you get on top of him, carefully placing both of his hands on your waist. he watches how you hold his dick and aligned it perfectly to your entrance. his eyes darted at you and hold a stare while you slowly sunk on his dick making you both moan in pleasure.
jay’s a tough man. he’s very independent and ever since he was a little, he refused to be viewed at the weaker side. he’s known for his nonchalant side, but with you he’s more than willing to show his vulnerable side. the side that melts completely to your soft touches and the side that submits to your soft gaze. he will fully let you take over him whole and he promised he will never regret. he perfectly knew his weakness and she’s right in front of him, looking so beautiful as always.
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dark-night-hero · 2 months ago
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Imagine being Sylus' high-school sweetheart, like the typical power couple that everyone in the campus knows about. A subject of envy and admiration. The couple that eveyone aspire to become.
Imagine years went by and you loathe the very same man you once dreamt of becoming your other half. The one you once build all your dream with only to come crashing down when he left without a word. Not a damn word and he vanished right after that very same night he promised to be yours and only yours.
Imagine Sylus who came back like he never left, at the very same night were you were declared as the heir, the next leader into your father's mafia legacy, there he waltz in the room. Only to have known later that day that he was heir of the rival group your family has been on conflict with.
Imagine not too long after that night, you were walking on your own only to find yourself pressed down on the wall but it was alright, you have been drilled into this situation long ago so it did not take you a lot of effort to press the tip of your gun into his skull, specially when he did not even bothering nudging you off. "It's been a while, Kitten." "Well fuck you- Sylus."
Imagine fucking hating him. You fucking hate him, the way he left without saying anything, the way he act like nothing happened after leaving you. The way he made you feel like all those sleepless nights wondering if you were never enough was all for naught. You fucking hate him, goodness gracious you do but fucking hell. You do miss him.
"Just so you know, I still fucking hate you." You stated in which made him chuckle. Leaning over you to give you a kiss on the crown of your head, fingers brushing through your bare skin as he laid down right beside you. "I know Kitten." He was not asking for forgiveness. Not when he know he doesn't deserve it. Nevertheless, this was enough. Looking over you, he finds you asleep. "I love you. I never stop loving you." Or maybe not, by the way your hand curl into a fist that goes unnoticed by him.
Imagine all the secret late night talks, all the exchange glances. The way the two of you would sneak into the night only to see each other. All the confidential mission but were secretly going out for a date with none other than your family's number one enemy heir. It was funny when you think about. How much you love and hate this very same guy who once break your heart was also the same guy who was slowly trying to fix it.
Imagine one day, you find yourself staring at a white ceiling. Eyes adjusting on the blinding light as you raise a hand to cover it when all of a sudden, you were bombarded with questions. "Who are you?" That was the only question that came out of your mind before everything came crashing out. Your head starts to ache. And before you knew it, everything went black once again.
Imagine years went by ever since the massacre of the your mafia organisation. Sylus got a report stating a person looking very similar to his long lost lover who was believed to have perished long ago has been spotted. It was not like he was not looking forward to it, but it was also not the first time such report came into him. He received at least a hundred reports every month only to be disappointed when everything was done. He knew you were alive, you body was never found. You have to be alive.
"Who are you?" He felt like he had been stab in the heart when you look at him with such distrust. Even when he left you and came back like the asshole he was, you never looked at him like that. "I'm not the one you are looking for." You walked passed him like he was nothing. "Weirdo." You utter, yet somehow. It hurts when you did such thing which was strange, you don't even know that guy.
[ⓒdark-night-hero] 2025°
: I fucked this one up, I'm sorry.
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lostinlovingrevery · 1 month ago
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Canceled Plans
70s! Logan X F! Reader
You have plans, but so does Logan
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A/N: Fighting through writers block! The way this fic is literally a warmup. Been obsessed with 70's Logan lately. Hes so yummy.
Warnings: SMUT, mdni!, Morning sex, established relationship, unprotected piv, Logan being a menace and cocky, also being a little needy but in a dom way, fingering, gets a lil rough, some praise, creampie, snuggles <3
The ringing of your alarm clock stirred you from your sweet dreams.
The first thing you noticed is heavy arms wrapped possessively around you. A face buried into your neck. A broad chest against your back. Legs intertwined with each other. You were surrounded by nothing but sheets, pillows, and him.
Stretching your arm out to hit the annoying alarm clock, shutting the ringing off before retreating back to the warm nest you've found yourself in. You closed your eyes for another minute, the call of sleep and snuggles sounding sweeter and sweeter- then deciding that would be dangerous and you absolutely had to get up and get ready for the day.
Stirring, a soft moan escaped you as you removed Logan's arm wrapped around you in a firm embrace, beginning to climb out of your nest.
Only to get sucked right back in.
"Mm-mm." Logan grumbles, a sound of displeasement in your ear. His arms rewrap themselves around you. Strong, warm, you brought your hands up to caress them, nails gently scratching up and down one arm.
"I gotta get up Lo."
"No." He mutters. You giggled at his response. "Too early."
"For you, maybe. Some of us have things to do." You retort, but he simply buried his face into your hair. "C'mon," Your voice lighthearted. "let me up."
A heartbeat passed and he grumbles, loosening his hold on you. You began climbing out of bed again, pulling the comforter off of you- only to be pulled back into his arms again with a yelp.
You turn your head to look up at him, and could see how much he was suppressing his smile with closed eyes- pretending to be asleep. He finally opened them, and his cocky grin could no longer be hidden when he's met with your bewilderment. You laughed,
"Howlett!" You struggled in his arms with no avail, mirth escaping you.
"No, no, You ain't going anywhere sweetheart." He hums, "You're staying right here, with me."
"Lo-" You brought a hand up to his cheek, brushing through his beard and softly scratching it. You leaned forward, kissing the tip of his nose, but he lowered his head to meet your lips. You parted from his lips, your hand climbing into his hair and scratching at his scalp.
There was a time you actually thought this man wasn't serious about you. He seemed to be a regular Casanova, and you were sure that he was going to break you heart sooner than later. You waited for the pin to drop after every date, every steamy night together, every deep conversation where he opened up to you- puzzle by puzzle.
It never happened.
He was the first to say "I love you"
"You gotta let me up baby."
He let out a small sigh, a small roll of his eyes, as he lets you go.
"Thank you-" You respond with a singsong voice and pecked his lips once more. You climbed out from your side of the bed. Still nude from last nights adventures with Logan. You walked around the mattress to his side, where you dresser was located.
Logan turned onto his back, watching you with sleepy eyes until your back was turned to him as you pulled open a drawer searching for the clothes you wanted to wear today. His sleepy expression turned dark, as his eyes trailed down your spine, to your tush- noticing the prominent bite mark he left on it last night. Smirking, he quietly sat up from the bed, and in a swift movement grabbed you and pulled you back onto the bed.
You squealed in surprise, before Logan came through, kneeling between your legs, staring down over you with a sinful grin. You looked up in surprise.
"Logan!" You reached your hands out to press against his hairy chest, feeling arousal and heat rush to your core at the sight of his muscular figure above you.
"LoGAn" He mocks your voice, grabbing your wrists, pinning you down to the mattress. He captured your lips in a messy and possessive kiss. "Told ya sweetheart-" He licks into your mouth. "You're staying with me."
You moaned into his kiss, lifting your hips against his. He moved to press kisses all over your face, and then along your chin, jaw, and down your neck.
"Lo-" You whined. "I hav-"
"Yeah yeah, you got things to do." He mutters, pressing a kiss to the bottom of your ear. "Places to be, people to talk to. I got my own plans too, sweetheart."
He removed his hands from your wrists, moving to the crooks of your legs and pushing them forward, spreading you open for him. His erect cock resting atop your core.
"-and that includes you and me," He leaned down over you, pressing his chests against your breasts. You gasped, his weight atop you was comforting- but a lot. "...never leaving this room."
He pressed open mouth kisses along your collar bone, as he pushed his cock through your wet folds, sliding it through over and over. His tip bumped into your clit, sharp gasps escaping you each time.
"God you- Oh- You're insatiable." You whined.
"Only cause it's you baby." He hummed, capturing you into a messy and heated kiss. He pushed your legs to rest on his shoulders, bracing one hand by your head, the other sliding between your heated bodies, finding the bundle of nerves that sent you careening just from his touch.
He grinned at how you reacted to him, small gasps and whines gracing his ears- music to his ears. He wanted to listen to you, his never-ending song.
His fingers swirled over your clit, sending waves of warm honey-like pleasure through you. You melted into the mattress, your hands gripped the sheets as your arched your back into him, your legs falling off his shoulders.
He removed his fingers just as you felt the winding tight feeling in your lower belly. You whined and he chuckled.
"Don't worry, I got you." He hums. He took his shaft in hand, throbbing, desperate for your walls to clench around him. He led himself to your entrance, pushing his tip inside you.
You gasped, your hands came up, pressed to his chest as you let out a small hiss from the intrusion.
"Sssshh." He laid himself atop of you, slowly pushing deeper inside, watching as your eyes rolled back and mouth fall open in amusement. He tipped his chin up and looked down at you, clicking his tongue sympathetically, shaking his head, "S'okay sweet girl. I got you." He purrs. "Always taking me so damn good. Such a good girl aren't you?"
You moaned, your head falling back, exposing your neck to him. Your pussy clenched around him so damn tight it was almost painful. Almost.
"Logan-" You whimpered, small heated gasps escaping you. He pressed butterfly kisses to your exposed neck, before finding your pulse point- and biting down, eliciting a yelp that turned into a moan as he sucked on your skin and gave you time to adjust to his size. He could feel you pulsing and clenching around him, desperate for him to move- trying to milk him of his release so early. "Oh- Please, I need you to move-" You breathed.
"So polite." He chuckled, slowly he rutted his hips into you, before he began pulling out to the tip- and pushing back inside. Your head fell to the side limply, turning into a ragdoll in his arms- just how he liked you.
He picked up pacing, fucking you with a vigor that you'll never get used to, and love it intensely. Your legs hung over his bulging biceps, his veins popping out from the tension he held in making sure he didn't spill into you prematurely- because fuck you always feel so damn good and it takes him everything to hold back, even if he plays himself off as the smooth one.
His hips slammed into yours, his heavy balls slapped against your cunt. A slick wet noise was heard through the room- alongside your heavenly pants and Logan's animalistic grunts. The mattress squeaked repeatedly, and the bed frame groaned- unlikely to take any more of you and Logan's abuse.
His free hand came up, cupping your jaw and tipping your head to look at him. He smirked at you already fucked out expression.
"In a rush to go somewhere now sweetheart?" He hums, leaning down to brush his lips over yours as he spoke. Your hazy eyes looked into his, and you couldn't help but think:
So damn cocky
"Damn right I am." He smirks, as if he read your mind. He angled himself, pounding faster into your pussy and sent you reeling as the tip of his cock found the gummy spot inside you. Your hands frantically climbed into his hair, and then clung to his back- nails digging into his skin, leaving red crescent sharp marks that'll heal over as soon as your remove your hold on him.
"Logan!" You cried out for him- feeling the familiar tightening building in your lower belly- it was strong, overwhelming, and brought tears to your eyes as he continued pounding into you. his arms quickly wrapped around your torso, your legs hooked over his elbows and your arms pinned to your sides. He planted his face into your neck gasping and grunting - fucking into you with a new force he hadn't used before.
It was so much, it was too much. Tears rolled down your face as you begged for your released. You felt the bed creaking and groaning- and your swear it was now being pushed out of place with the power of each of Logan's thrusts into you.
"Fuck- c'mon baby-" He hissed into your ear through gritted teeth as he turned his head to see your fucked out expression. "Fucking love you, you know that? Cum for me-"
That was the final nail, as pleasure erupted through your body, sending waves and waves over you- so hard you saw stars as he continued working you through your coitus. You screamed his name, as you shook underneath him. You were so out of it you didn't even hear him praising you.
He reached his own peak during yours, burying himself as deep as he could, his legs and feet digging into the mattress desperately trying to make sure you get every drop inside of you.
He let out a choked gasp as the last of his cum shoots out in ropes inside you, nearly beginning to leak out just from the sheer amount.
You both collapsed in exhaustion. He used his arms to not allow his full weight to crush you under him. Pants and frantic heartbeats filled the room.
Finally your turned your head towards him. Heavy and tired eyes that were filled with love looking at him. You managed to free one of your arms, brushing a few strands of his sweat-slicked hair from his forehead, gently petting and scratching his scalp.
"I love you too." You smiled, your voice barely a whisper- sore and dry from your earlier vocalizations. He hummed, a sound almost akin to a purr.
"That mean you'll cancel those plans?" He murmured, closing his eyes.
You giggled. "You didn't give me much of choice." You shook your head, now playing with his hair tuffs. He sighed contentedly, before sitting up, carefully helping you out of your position, before maneuvering the both of you back into the spot you woke up in not long ago.
"Good." He responds, his arms wrapping securely around you and pulling you against his chest after he pulled the blanket back over the two of you. Once again creating the nest of blankets, pillows, and him.
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blaqcats-fics · 2 months ago
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unfortunately, i usually don't keep track of birthdays specifically in fandoms. so, imagine my shock when i found out that i share a birthday with bruce wayne (feb 19) — based on silverage and modern-age Batman. it is also a shock that i also just found out this man is a pisces. so in honor of both of our birthdays, here’s just a fun little skit!!
It starts with a podcast.
Tim’s the one who’s listening to it, earbuds in, looking for background noise while he codes. He barely registers the conversation until he hears the words:
“You know who gives me serious Pisces energy? Batman.”
Tim blinks. Rewinds. Listens again.
“I mean, think about it. Secretive? Brooding? Carries the weight of the world on his shoulders but refuses to talk about his feelings? Classic water sign behavior. Probably cries in the Batmobile.”
Tim immediately forwards the clip to the family group chat.
Steph is the first to react.
Steph: HOLY SHIT WAIT IS BRUCE A PISCES??
Damian: Don’t be ridiculous.
Steph: NO. THIS MAKES SENSE.
Steph: Moody. Overdramatic. Keeps adopting kids for no reason other than his feelings?? Classic Pisces.
Dick: If Bruce is a Pisces, that would explain SO MUCH.
Damian: This is stupid. He doesn’t even believe in astrology.
Steph: Because he’s a Pisces and doesn’t want to be perceived.
Dick: Wait when is his birthday again??
Tim double-checks. Then he stares at the date.
Tim: …Feburary 19th.
Silence.
Then:
Steph: OH MY GOD.
Dick: OH MY GOD.
Damian: This means nothing.
Jason: No. No. It means EVERYTHING.
When Jason jumps on board, things escalate.
Because Jason starts compiling evidence.
“Think about it,” he tells Dick later that night. “He’s moody as hell. He broods. He internalizes everything. He loves tragedy. I bet you anything he listens to sad music while doing patrol.”
Dick, who has personally witnessed Bruce listen to Chopin while looking out over Gotham like he’s in a Victorian novel, has no counterargument.
Alfred’s reaction is the worst.
“Master Bruce is, indeed, a Pisces,” he says when asked. “It explains quite a bit, I’ve always thought.”
Bruce is right there.
He looks up from his paperwork, eyes narrowed. “It doesn’t explain anything.”
“Of course, sir.” Alfred’s voice is as dry as the Batcave itself. “It is mere coincidence that you have the emotional repression of a particularly stubborn fish.”
Now that they know, they start noticing everything.
“He’s so sentimental,” Steph says, watching Bruce silently look at the Bat-Signal with his arms crossed. “Like. Deeply sentimental. I bet he has an old love letter tucked away somewhere that he rereads when he’s feeling tragic.”
Jason hums. “He does keep Selina’s notes.”
Tim gasps.
“Oh my god,” Dick whispers. “He’s the most Pisces to ever Pisces.”
The final straw is when Cass catches Bruce watching a French noir film in the dark with a glass of scotch.
She takes a picture.
It’s sent to the group chat immediately.
Cass: Look at this. Look at him.
Tim: That is the most Pisces shit I’ve ever seen.
Jason: He’s mourning a past life rn.
Steph: He’s thinking about his tragic love affairs. Probably wishing he could save them.
Dick: He’s gonna write poetry about it later.
Damian: All of you need to be stopped.
Eventually, Bruce notices.
Because of course he does.
“What,” he says, standing in the middle of the Batcave, staring at them like they’ve personally betrayed him, “is happening?”
Nobody speaks.
Then Damian, who has had enough, scowls and says, “They have been discussing your astrological sign.”
Bruce blinks.
“They are also keeping a list of your most Pisces-like behaviors.”
Jason immediately hurls a smoke bomb to escape.
It doesn’t end there.
A week later, Clark drops by.
“I heard you were a Pisces,” he says, grinning.
Bruce throws a batarang at him.
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badbtssmut · 10 months ago
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A party for three
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As usual, you and your boyfriend Taehyung travel by van to the same festival the both of you have been going to since you first started dating. But when you run into his best friend at the festival, you suddenly end the night with your pussy filled to the brim.
Contains: Everyone is under the influence, drunk, threesome, dubcon cause nobody’s thinking clearly, yn gets called a slut, double penetration in pussy <- yn winces and says it’s too tight but Tae encourages her, yn cries out of pleasure, riding, missionary, doggystyle, boobplay, multi orgasm, just fucking with literally zero thoughts
Admin note: fuck me I wrote this all on the tumblr app and it didn’t fucking save and I had to do it AGAIN!! :)
It was a warm night in the middle of summer as you and your boyfriend, Taehyung, pulled up in the parking lot of a venue you knew all too well. The two of you had been coming to this exact music festival for a few years now, and tonight was just the same as any other.
Or so you thought.
You cheered as one of your favorite bands entered the stage and took the crowd by storm, their fans immediately beginning to crowd the stage and the surrounding area.
Taehyung, on the other hand, wasn't even watching the band. He was busy watching you, your smile lighting up your entire face as you swayed your hips to the music and sang along to the lyrics. When you felt his eyes on you, you glanced over at him, smiling at him before you stepped closer and gave him a peck on the lips.
"Are you enjoying the show?" You asked him, giggling.
He shrugged. "I am now," he said, wrapping an arm around your waist and pulling you against him.
You giggled at his words; not sure if it was because you were tipsy or because you were amused by his cheesiness, but nonetheless he made you giggle.
A tap on his shoulder caught him by surprise and he turned around in confusion before a grin made his way to his face.
“Hey!” Jimin greeted cheerfully, (he was Taehyung’s best friend), waving at the two of you.
“Hey! What are you doing here?” Taehyung asked, which earned a playful push from Jimin.
“Dude, the same as you two are doing here, obviously, except I don’t have a pretty girl on my arm.”
You smiled at his compliment and reached over to give him a hug, and he hugged you back.
Jimin tagged along with the three of you, and the band was still going strong and performing, so you all decided to continue partying together. The music was loud, the drinks were flowing, and you were definitely a bit more than tipsy at this point. Your head was spinning, your body felt light, and you couldn’t stop giggling as you leaned into Taehyung for support, who was also quite drunk.
The band played a song that was more on the slower side, so everyone was moving along to the music rather than jumping up and down like they had been earlier.
"Hey," Taehyung murmured in your ear, and you turned around to face him, "want to head back to the van and relax a bit?"
You nodded in response.
“Jimin? You coming with us or staying here?" You asked, turning to his best friend.
“Yeah, let’s go.”
And with that, the three of you walked out of the venue and to the parking lot, where you all stepped into the van; it was one of those fancy ones, the really big vans that had a bedroom, a bathroom, a kitchen— it was fucking expensive but Taehyung insisted that it would be cool for road trips and it definitely was.
You flopped down on the bed and closed your eyes, your head spinning, and a few seconds later you felt the bed sink a bit, and you opened your eyes to see that it was Jimin, and he was staring at you.
"Y/N, I have been curious for a while... can I ask you something?" He said, a mischievous grin on his face.
"Sure." You responded, curious as to what he wanted to know.
"Your boobs, they look really soft, can I touch them? I've always wanted to feel them."
You laughed, his bluntness amusing you. “Okay.”
He reached his hand forward, and you watched as he gently cupped your breasts through your bra. He squeezed them a few times, and then he looked up at you. "Can I touch you under your shirt?" Jimin asked, his eyes hopeful.
You were feeling bold (probably due to all the stuff you took), and also very turned on, so you nodded. "Go ahead."
With your permission, he pushed your shirt up and over your head, and you sat up and unhooked your bra, letting it fall off of your shoulders. And then before you knew it, you and Jimin were cuddled up, your back rested against the wall as he laid on top of you, sucking on your tits and groping your boobs.
You had one hand resting on his head and the other found it’s way between your legs, rubbing your pussy through your shorts, moaning at the sensation.
Before you knew it, Jimin’s cock was in his hands, and he was pushing your shorts to the side and grinding his erection against your clit before it slipped in and was sliding in and out of you.
You wrapped your arms around his neck, holding him close as he pounded into you, the two of you breathing heavily.
"Fuck, Y/N, you're so wet, baby," he moaned, thrusting his cock in and out of your pussy, his hips snapping against your ass, "so good, fuck."
You were panting, throwing your head back as his cock slammed into you, over and over.
The door then creaked open, and you looked over to see that it was your boyfriend, standing in the doorway. However, he didn’t seem fazed by the fact his girlfriend was getting fucked by his best friend. Instead, he stepped forward and crawled onto the bed, next to you. He grabbed hold of your face and kissed you, his tongue slipping past your lips, and you could taste the alcohol on his breath. His fingers trailed to your clit, rubbing it with his thumb as he continued to kiss you.
Taehyung pulled away, taking in the sight of his best friend’s cock drilling into you.
“Good pussy?” Taehyung asked with a chuckle.
"Very good pussy," Jimin replied, moaning as he thrusted his cock in and out of you, "gonna beat it up so good, gonna fuck it all up," he groaned, his hand reaching down to grab onto your tit.
“Mmhmm, I know how much she likes her pussy getting beat up. Do you like having your pussy beat up, baby?" Taehyung cooed.
You could only whimper, your mouth hanging open and your eyes squeezed shut.
“She loves it, dude, look at her," said Jimin, smirking.
Taehyung watched in awe as you rode his best friend's cock, your walls fluttering around his thick length. Taehyung could no longer ignore his hardening cock, so he reached down and unzipped his jeans, his erection springing free.
You felt him press his cock against your cheek, and you opened your eyes to see him holding his errection, the head rubbing against your cheek.
"You want it, baby?" He asked, and you nodded eagerly, opening your mouth. He guided his cock towards your mouth, and you opened it wider to take it, allowing him to slide it between your lips.
As you sucked on his cock, he ran his fingers over your arms before he held onto your hand and watched as you bobbed your head up and down, slurping and sucking on his shaft, your mouth full of his cock.
“Jimin…” You whined, spreading your legs as far as they could, allowing his cock to slam into you even deeper, and it was driving you crazy.
"What's wrong, miss Tae’s girlfriend? Can't take anymore?" He teased, grinning as he watched your face contort in pleasure, Taehyung’s cock slipping out of your mouth. Jimin grabbed you by the hips, holding you in place as he adjusted himself, fucking you from a deeper angle. Taehyung wrapped your fingers around his shaft, and you started to rub him off, watching as Jimin drilled into you.
"Such a pretty little slut, taking me and Tae's cock, I bet your pussy's just dying to get fucked, isn't it, slut?" Jimin asked with gritted teeth.
You cried out in response, your eyes rolling back in your head, and soon you were cumming, your pussy squeezing and contracting around his cock.
Taehyung stroked himself faster, watching as you came, and Jimin pulled out, wanting to feel your mouth around his cock, while Taehyung took his place, lifting you off the bed and putting you on his lap, facing him.
You sunk yourself onto his cock, wrapping your arms around his neck as you started to ride him, and he thrusted his hips upward, meeting yours.
“Yeah babe, ride my cock just like that, bounce on my dick," Taehyung encouraged, groaning as he watched you bounce up and down on his shaft, his hands resting on your hips.
Jimin stood next to the bed, jerking himself off as he watched you get fucked, and he stepped closer to you and held his cock out, and you immediately took him into your mouth, moaning as you moved your head back and forth, taking him all the way in.
“Love it?” Taehyung cooed, his hands moving to your ass and squeezing your cheeks.
“Love it so much," you managed to say, the two of them thrusting their cocks in and out of you.
"Love your holes filled with my cock and my best friend's, don't you, baby?" Taehyung whispered as he caressed your face.
"Yes, Tae, love it, love cocks so much, please," you begged, your voice a whimper.
"Gonna fuck you until you're sore and can't walk," he said, smirking as he slapped your ass, "want two cocks in your pussy? Think you can handle that?”
“She wants two cocks?” Jimin pulled his errection out of your mouth, stroking himself as he stared at your pussy.
Taehyung lifted you off his dick, turning you around, your back against his chest and his dick pressed against your ass.
"Jimin's cock is nice and big too, so I think it'll be a tight fit. Think you can handle that, babe?"
“Please, want them,” You giggled, rolling your hips impatiently, “put cock in me, I want it."
Taehyung grabbed hold of his cock and pushed the tip into you, and then slowly lowered you down onto him, letting out a hiss as your sweet pussy engulfed him.
You leaned back into his chest, and he wrapped his arms around your waist, his hands resting on your stomach. He began to pump his cock in and out of you, his eyes falling closed.
"Mmhmm," he hummed, "love your pussy, so good, babe."
"I love it too," said Jimin, climbing onto the bed, his cock brushing against your thigh, still rock hard. “Where do I put it in? Don’t see space, too tight."
You were about to open your mouth to tell him where to put it, but before you could, Taehyung spoke first.
"Just push it in on top of mine," Taehyung told him, "don't worry, she'll make space."
Jimin did what he was told, and you felt him start to push in, at which you winced and whimpered.
"Shhh, you'll be okay," cooed your boyfriend, his hand going to your clit and rubbing it gently, "just relax and let it happen, baby. Don't worry, we're not gonna hurt you, promise.” He whispered against your ear, before leaving a trail of kisses down your neck.
“Too tight, too full…” You whimpered, squirming in his arms, but he held you in place, his grip tightening around your waist.
"Baby, I can feel Jimin’s cock, it’s almost in all the way, you feel it too? He's rubbing his cock against mine," said your boyfriend, chuckling softly.
"Yeah, yeah," Jimin breathed, finally pushing his cock all the way in, letting out a deep groan, "fuck, so tight, fuck."
The two of them started to move, and the sensation of having both their cocks inside of you was almost too much to bear.
"Please, don't stop, don't stop," you chanted, tears streaming down your cheeks as they pumped their cocks in and out of you, stretching your pussy even further, filling you up so perfectly.
They both began to speed up, and the room was filled with the sounds of their grunts and moans, along with the sound of your pussy squelching as they fucked it.
"Shit, she's milking my cock," said Jimin, his hands grabbing onto your thighs, pushing your legs back as he drilled into you. Taehyung never lost his rhythm, pounding upwards with a steady pace, his cock hitting all the right places— while Jimin pushed in, Taehyung pulled out, when Taehyung took a break, Jimin didn’t stop, and occasionally you’d be double drilled when they’d both push their cocks in at the same time, the sensations overwhelming and mind numbing.
You cried out as your pussy began to spasm, and soon you were cumming again, the two of them fucking you through it, their dicks continuing to pound into your pussy, not slowing down for a second.
“Oh, oh!” Your eyes rolled back, mouth wide open and drool leaking from the corner of your mouth. You didn’t know how you were taking two cocks at the same time, but you were, and it felt amazing.
After the double penetrating, you ended up in the arms of your boyfriend who fucked you missionary style, the two of you making out while he thrusted into you, his tongue down your neck and his hands exploring your body, squeezing your breasts as he enjoyed your pussy. Then after, Jimin took over and fucked you doggystyle, your legs spread and back arched as his cock rammed into you from behind, your ass jiggling each time his hips met yours.
You didn’t know how long the three of you managed to keep it up, but you fell asleep somewhere between the sex, and when you woke up the sun was shining through the curtains and you were wrapped in a blanket.
Taehyung was heard in the kitchen, presumably making breakfast.. or lunch.
You sat up, wincing as your muscles ached and the events of last night replayed in your head.
That was just a fucked up wet dream, right?
Your boyfriend stepped into the room, holding a plate.
"Hey babe, here, I made you some breakfast, thought you needed it after last night."
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bluemerakis · 2 months ago
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⋆˚࿔ °・⌇ SOLDIER BOY HEADCANNONS .ᐟ
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𖦹 SOLDIER BOY has reoccurring nightmares. He has deep-rooted trauma from both the physical and emotional wars of his past—his abusive childhood, the bloody battles fought, and the years he spent as the russians’ experiment. He’s brash and forward in most aspects of his life, but not when it comes to confronting his trauma head-on. Thus, it tends to accumulate and lay siege on him during the time when he’s most vulnerable—in his sleep. He often wakes up in a fit amidst the dead night, and the first thing he does isn’t grounding himself with a few, steadying breaths or a doing scan of his surroundings—it’s to instinctively reach across the bed to make sure you’re still there beside him. To make sure he’s not alone. He’s so plagued with the need to be loved and valued, that he’s latched onto the one person who’s shown him nothing but. So, funnily enough, losing you might be the worst nightmare of all time.
𖦹 SOLDIER BOY wears a simple, silver promise ring on his left index finger. After a year of dating, you gifted it to him as a commemoration of your relationship milestone. His first instinct was to bitch about it, but it came from a place of unfamiliarity—Ben’s not used to gifts. He’s barely adjusted to the stability of the lifestyle he’s founded within you. But he takes it, anyway—briskly slipping it into his pocket while he practically herds you into the bedroom for a gift of his own. He kept it stashed aside in a memoir box—yes, he owns one and he hoards all his gems of the past in it for nostalgia’s sake because he’s just an old-timey boy who never fully adjusted to modern life. And after gnawing his ear off about never wearing it, he looped a chain through it and wore it like a dog tag—afraid that it’d get lost to some combat commotion if he wore it on his hand. And then one day, you’d absentmindedly brought up the idea of marriage, and later that night, Ben finds himself considering the lifestyle by finally slipping that ring onto his finger. As time passes, he finds himself absentmindedly playing with it whenever he’s idling around or unwinding from the day. And it’s something he specially reaches for when he feels overwhelmed or anxious. It quiets his brain, like the mere touch of it is the calming tether that keeps him grounded in the midst of his mental storms—reminds him of the solid rock that is you.
𖦹 SOLDIER BOY often experiences the “Proust Phenomenon”—where certain smells trigger vivid memories of the past. Due to his Supe nature, Ben’s olfactory senses are enhanced—like a k9 with extensive years of training. It was a handy skill when it came to operations and the element of surprise surrounding rigged locations, where he could detect the biting scent of chemical agents and certain metals that smelled like sure death. But, ironically, it’s also a perforation in his balls-of-steel armour. And now, in the modern days—stemming from the PTSD of his past—there are certain smells that remind Ben of his time in the Russian compound. Of the torture he endured. Metal traces, gunpowder, general anaesthetic—which shares the same undertone of the novichok gas used to put him to sleep. Fun fact—when you had to get your wisdom teeth removed, Ben dropped you off and picked you up but refused to step foot inside the building. He can’t tolerate the smells—chemicals, gas, death. It overwhelms him, and it’s unwelcome on his mind. And later that night, he wouldn’t go within ten feet of you—bothered by the scent of the anaesthetic still clinging to you. Eerily familiar. It was an eye-opening moment for you and the true magnitude of his trauma. So, overtime, you both worked on a way to counter-condition the trait—using smells he could associate with better memories. Something like the scent of your perfume. Everyday, before he leaves the house, he makes sure to spurt a drop of your perfume onto the neckline of his shirt—so that it evades his nose at all times. So that there’s no room for his senses to entertain a smell other than yours. It keeps him grounded and wards off the other scents threatening to invade his fickle peace of mind. And best of all, it smothers him with every thought, feeling and memory associated with you. Another way for him to be consumed by all that you are, even when you’re miles apart.
𖦹 SOLDIER BOY craves your proximity. It’s not something he’s aware he does, but it happens, regardless. When you first started dating, it wasn’t anything too serious—mutual benefits with minimal strings attached. But unbeknownst to him, he’d come to crave your company like relentless clockwork. And he was a colossal prick when he didn’t get it—especially on the late nights where he’s taunted by his thoughts. A phone call that found you in the midst of a club amongst men—any man that wasn’t him—was a line of static corrupted with heated words. And a few minutes later, he’d show up like a relentless tractor, ploughing through the crowd with the sole objective to pluck you from the masses and lead you back to the car with a firm grip on your wrist. His possessiveness is something you helped work him through, and he’s surely dialled it down to a stinging glare and a tongue bitten raw whenever another guy spares you attention that extends beyond a polite conversation. He is refined, though—more subtle in his possessiveness. Like when you’re in the kitchen making dinner, he simply grabs a beer and sips on it while standing a little ways away from you, leaned against the counter while he watches TV from across the apartment. If you drift to the island to start plating the meals, he strays to the other end of it—all while his eyes remained glued on the TV. He doesn’t know he’s doing it—it’s like an instinct to be tethered to you at all times, following, guarding, yearning.
𖦹 SOLDIER BOY always opens doors for you. Car doors, restaurant doors, apartment door. Any door. Initially, out of habit, he’d always enter the space before you and do a quick sweep of the area—like he’s on the scout for potential danger, or like you’re the president that he’s tasked with keeping safe—before beckoning you inside. It was a prevalent routine in the initial months of his domestic life, but you’d sat him down one night to talk about it—how he doesn’t need to be on such high alert anymore. And admittedly, how it hurt a tad bit that he didn’t let you in first. Almost as though those words had flipped a switch about how unaccustomed you are to his Soldier habits—he made sure from that night onward, that he always lets you in first. He’d wanted to argue that he was doing it from a place of good intent, wanting to keep you safe from any potential hidden threats, but he’d bit down on his tongue. Because it didn’t matter. There was not a damn thing worth doing if it didn’t favour your happiness. Now, he always makes sure that he opens the door to a room and steps aside to usher you in with a jerk of his chin. But once you’re inside, he still executes a subtle scout—a brief survey tossed over your oblivious shoulder and a hasty sweep of the outside before he trails in after you. You’re his gem, after all, and he can’t risk having you stolen from him.
𖦹 SOLDIER BOY drives with one hand on the wheel, and the other on you. Whenever you’re his passenger princess—which is always because he still believes in misogynistic chivalry, his hand always manages to stray from the gear and onto the hump of your thigh. Always. He holds you there, strokes an absentminded thumb over the skin, or rubs soothing lines that sometimes dip far too close to your core. And not once will he look at you while he does it—as if it adds to suspense of his clingy encroachment—but you might catch the corner of his lip spreading with a knowing smirk. He also has one hand on your headrest whenever he’s reversing, and then it’ll trail down to tuck your hair behind your ear, or run two fingers down your jaw before settling in its rightful place amongst your thigh.
𖦹 SOLDIER BOY likes TLC. I feel like this started with one of those times he was sat on the sofa watching TV, and you snuck up behind him to run your hands through his fluffy hair—because come on. At first, he might’ve flinched away from the unfamiliar intimacy—habitually moving to seize you at the wrist and yank you away with a low muttering of “the fuck you doin’?” But you shake him off with a giddy laugh, telling him to lay off the armour of stress for two seconds before returning your hands to his hair. He still tenses under the touch, but the longer your hands spend entwined with the hairs flowing from his scalp, he starts to melt under the touch—like you’re loosening the strings woven through the very DNA that renders his every muscle tightly-knit. Scalp massages turn into neck and shoulder massages, and that turns into rubbing out his back—and it even extends all the way to arm and head tickles. Sometimes, while you’re laying in bed, he’ll settle himself down beside you with a kiss to your jaw before he’s leaned his head against the side of yours—and he won’t say anything, but there’s a newfound stillness to him that screams expectancy. And when your hand wanders up his back and around his neck to settle in his hair, you feel him start to relax—unwind. And once, he let slip a soft and strained groan of pleasure, like he was desperately trying to swallow the truth of how much he enjoys ed it. But it never escaped your notice, and it wasn’t the last time he did it.
𖦹 SOLDIER BOY loves doggy-style for a quickie, and cowgirl for a stickie. When this man is hard and craving a quick release, he does love the idea bending you over beneath him and sending you to heaven. He’s a refined type of rough, never pushing limits he knows would hurt or leave a bruise you’re not keen on sporting. However, if you ask for it, he’s happy to oblige. And he LOVES holding you at your waist—loves it. Absolutely clings to it like a lifeline—kneading, gripping, pulling you into his every thrust. And he loves drinking in the view of your back—arching and flexing with silent pleas for his touch. But on the slower, softer nights of the week, he’s quite fond of cowgirl—back against the head-board with you on top of him, riding him at a pace that suits your current mood and needs. His hold on you is firm, but open for adjustment—guidance. And he’ll be damned if he doesn’t admit that the mere view of your face—contorted with pleasure and effort alike—gets him worked up in addition to your every movement. God, you’re the prettiest girl he’s ever had the pleasure of calling his, and he watches you like he’s trying to memorise every detail about you. And if he doesn’t also love watching the way you swallow his length whole—and the way he glistens with the mingle of your combined pleasure. This man loves a cream pie—said what I said. And dirty talk.
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a/n ─ first ever headcannons 👊 happy birthday to pookie schnooks! can you tell i worked hard on these? pls it’s almost 1 am now and i’ve been busy since 9 pm. and it’s all 100% canon in my head idc what y’all say.
thank you for reading! all likes & comments & deeply appreciated, but reblogs go a much longer way—so please support your writers with it! <3
tags ─ @gibson-g1rl @bohemianblasphemy @fallbhind @angelicjackles @deansbbyx @titsout4jackles @figthoughts @dulcescorderitas @starzify @ultravi0lence14 @honeyryewhiskey @daylighted @deansbeer @deansbbyx @figthoughts @dulcescorderitas @jasvtsc @st4rmarley @bakugotypecrashout @jaydensluv @chi-raz @youdontknowe @misatxox @lixiesbrowniess @ilovedeanwinchester4 @beelzebzb @lunaleah @kr804573 @idontwannabehere7 @lanasgirlfr @cas-only-angel @lucky-beheaded @nperoconelcositoarriba @mahi-wayy @alidiggory92 @idk-123-0 @tuxedoe @cassiecourtemanche @rositaslabyrinth @abox-of-rocks @viluren @h8aaz @cowboysandcigarettes @bejeweledinterludes @emeraldcrs @jensenacklesballsack
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© bluemerakis ─ do not plagiarise or steal any of my works.
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mischievousmoony · 2 months ago
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I’m blushing so hard at frat boy James!! What about the first time she comes over and meets the guys outside a party
hope i've done your idea justice! ty for requesting
𝚏𝚛𝚊𝚝 𝚑𝚘𝚞𝚜𝚎
⟢ frat boy!james potter x fem!reader ⊹ 1.9k ⟢ warnings/tags: references to drinking, technically american!james potter and american!marauders
── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ──
"It'll just take a minute," James promises. "We'll be in and out."
With his hand in yours, he leads you through the door, passing under the large Greek letters as you cross the threshold.
You have been seeing James for a month and a half. You never thought you'd be interested in a frat guy—you've never even step foot in one of their houses until now—but James has proven to be the opposite of what you thought a frat guy would be like.
James is a total sweetheart. Possibly the most thoughtful and genuine guy you've ever dated. He makes you feel special, always remembering the little things like your favorite flower or your drink orders at all your favorite places. He's attentive without ever being overbearing. But honestly, you don't think you could see him that way if you tried, always loving every bit of attention he gives you.
Today, he's taking you on a study date. He remembered that you were complaining about an upcoming exam in a class he's already taken, so he's grabbing his old notes and sitting you down in a quiet corner of the library so that he can help you study.
James would already have you set up in the library on the coziest chair with your favorite hot drink from the cafe if he didn't forget his old notebook in his room—which he felt rather sheepish about leaving behind.
So, here you are. James asked if you wanted to wait in the car, but you were curious to see the inside of one of these things. You half expected to see solo cups littering the floor, a pong table in place of a coffee table, and maybe even a few hungover frat guys strewn about the living room still sobering up from last nights antics.
You were a little surprised to find out that it was rather clean. You know from James that there was indeed a party here last night, but apparently they clean up nicely.
Although, you’re right about there being a pong table. But it is folded up and leaning against a wall for future use.
James guides you towards the stairs, but before he can even mount the first step someone appears in the foyer from a hall that you can see leads to the kitchen.
"Jamesie! Back so soon?" the boy cheers when his eyes land on his friend first. His eyes dart to you a second later, and something like recognition flashes in his expression. "Is this who I think it is?"
The boy has long, black hair that cascades just to his shoulders in soft waves, the kind that look effortless but too perfect to not be styled in some way. He stares at you with piercing blue eyes, making you feel oddly self-conscious, which might also have to do with the big smirk on his lips.
James squeezes your hand, sensing your nerves, but he'd bet money that they pale in comparison to his own. He's been nervous about bringing you around here. It doesn't have anything to do with you, or them (well, maybe he's a little worried they'll scare you off). You're really important to him, and so are they, and he's been putting a lot of pressure on introducing you to them. So, this unplanned visit has his palms sweating, which he's hoping you haven't noticed.
"Sirius," James greets his friend. "Yeah, this is Y/N."
Your eyes widen a fraction when Sirius immediately steps forward, taking your free hand to press a kiss to the back of your knuckles. "Hi, sweetheart, I've heard a lot about you. Truly, a lot. James has talked my ear off about you so I really feel like I'm meeting an old friend. I'm Sirius."
You feel heat rise to your cheeks but you're not alone, as James' own face turns rosy as he mutters a scolding "dude!" at his friend.
"Don't tell me you were just gonna sneak in without so much as a proper introduction." Sirius places a hand over his heart, a dramatic look of utter disbelief painting his face.
"We're just stopping by to get my notes. We have a very important study sesh to get to, didn't want to delay us too much," James explains, rocking back and forth on his heels.
"I promise it'll only be a short detour then. Pete and Remus are the only ones here anyway," Sirius says. His eyes dart to you again, something mischievous swimming within them. "We've all been dying to meet the girl that has our James so smitten. I mean, he's been going on and on and on. It's nice to finally have a pretty face to the name."
At Sirius’ words, you can’t help but crack a smirk as you peer up at James.
“Don’t look at me like that,” James murmurs, now rubbing his thumb across your knuckles the way he does when he gets anxious. James is sure the tips of his ears are bright red. Sirius will go to no end to embarrass him, but despite the fact that his heart might jump out of his chest at any second, James really only cares how you feel about the situation. James tilts his head toward you, lowering his voice to ask, "Are you up for meeting some of the guys?"
"Yeah," you say with a warm smile. "I'd love to meet your friends." And you really would. James talks a lot about them, too. Always reciting some story about all the shenanigans they've gotten into over the years.
You've been able to tell he's been overthinking bringing you to meet them. You get it—you're secure in James' feelings for you, so you know it's nothing personal. Plus, you were really nervous when James met your friends. To be honest, even though they were jokes, you're friends have made digs at frat guys before because of the stigma. You really wanted James and your friends to like each other, and thankfully, they really do and you had nothing to be worried about.
You hope that meeting his friends will have the same outcome and ease some of James' worries.
Sirius provides a generous introduction as you enter the kitchen. "Boys, it seems we have a very special guest in our midst this morning."
There are two guys sitting on kitchen stools who swivel around to greet you.
There's a lanky boy with mousy brown hair whose eyes dart back and forth between you and James before he directs a kind smile in your direction.
The other boy spins around mid-spoonful of a bowl of cereal. He abandons the utensil in his mouth to wave at you, his other hand occupied by the bowl resting in his palm.
Your eyes trail around the kitchen as James introduces you to them. It's rather large, as it would have to be to accommodate the large number of guys you assume live here.
You've also discovered the mess you thought you'd be stepping into. It seems that all of the discarded solo cups and beer cans have already been shoveled into a few trash bags, which are just about ready to burst at the seams as they wait by the back door to be taken out.
"I'm Peter," the boy with the cereal pipes up after returning his spoon to his bowl.
"Remus," the tall one introduces himself. "It's nice to meet you."
"You too," you say. "You know, I've never been in a frat house before. I take it you all live here?"
Remus is the only one who shakes his head. "Not a brother," he clarifies. "Just unlucky enough to have them as my best friends."
"Oh, you know you'd be lost without us," Sirius says, rolling his eyes playfully. "And it's not a frat house, it's a frat home," Sirius says very earnestly. Too add to his dramatics, he pulls Peter into a hug (which nearly makes him fall off his stool) and raps his fist against his back as he pretends to get emotional.
Peter's laughing as he shoves, Sirius off. "Alright, man," he says, swatting Sirius' hand away as he ruffles his hair.
"Sirius had beer for breakfast," Remus informs you to excuse Sirius' behavior.
"Hey, I only had two and I know you're not suggesting I'm a lightweight," Sirius points at Remus accusingly. "Anyway, I was just telling Y/N how often Jamesie muses about her."
Remus clicks his tongue, shaking his head. "Don't tease him too badly, Sirius.”
"It's not like it's not true," Peter shrugs, earning himself a glare from James.
You look up at James. His cheeks have deepened a few shades now as he glowers at Peter. You give his hand a squeeze to attract his attention, the expression on his face immediately softening when he looks at you.
“I think it’s sweet,” you say, encouraging a smile onto James’ lips. He drops your hand, only to wrap his arm around your shoulder and pull you into his side. You nuzzle your nose against his shoulder, looking at him with expectant eyes. He knows what you’re asking for, and would rather hand his friends more ammo to tease him with than deny you, so he gladly plants a tender kiss to the top of your head.
“You two are sickening.” Sirius leans over the counter, propping his chin up with his hand as he sighs dramatically. “It’s adorable,” he adds.
“Wrapped around her finger, are ya?” Peter joins in on the teasing.
James keeps his eyes on you as he responds. “You bet I am.”
You tear your eyes away from James’ sweet gaze to address his smirking friends. “You know, I've heard a lot about you guys too," you say.
Sirius lights up with intrigue. "Oh, do tell."
"Well, Peter must be the guy to go to if you want to have a laugh. Every time James asks ‘Wanna hear a story Peter told me’ I know I’m gonna have to sit through several fits of laughter before he gets to the end of it," you say, nudging James with your elbow who nods along to confirm your story.
Peter puffs up his chest, proud to be known as the funny one.
"Remus," you continue, "I should've known you weren't a brother. James always tells me about how they drag you into things that you have to get them out of. If he hasn't told you before, he's very thankful for you. And Sirius. I think I've heard the most interesting stories about you."
"This should be good," Sirius says, a cocky grin on his face. "I've given James a whole catalog of legendary stories to tell about me."
"My favorite is the one that started with you trying to impress a girl by jumping into the pool from the roof and ended with you in the bushes after you tripped on the gutter,” you say, an air of sweetness in your tone and a smile on your lips.
The confident smirk drops from Sirius’ face and James snorts a laugh beside you. Peter cracks up, and even Remus snickers at the look on Sirius’ face.
"I think you’ve just won over Sirius," Remus says, watching as his grin returns.
“You got me, I can appreciate that,” Sirius says. “Why have you been hiding her from us for so long, James? I like her.”
"Yeah, I like her too,” James replies, squeezing you a little closer into his side. He doesn't bother trying to hide the broad grin overtaking his features. As he looks down at your giggling face, he can't remember what he was so nervous about.
── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ──
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slutzforbueckers · 3 months ago
Note
could you do smut fluff paige just being gf coded? honestly anything cutesy and ofc add a little freak in
date nights — p.b x fem!reader
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pairing: paige bueckers x fem!reader
warnings: fluff; smut
synopsis: the start and ending of a date night with paige.
a/n: this isn’t proofread sorry!! also sorry it took so long to be finished 😔
‎♡₊˚ 🦢・₊✧
you stood in front of the full sized mirror in your bedroom, turned around looking over your shoulder as you tried to zip your dress up on your own. yes, you could've easily called for paige to come help you but you didn't want her to see you just yet. you had dressed up in a new dress that you found earlier when you went shopping with your friends, and you wanted to get her reaction once you were fully dressed and ready to go.
clearly your plans hadn't worked out like you wanted, you were struggling and had no other choice but to call for paige. you let out a frustrated huff and dropped your hands to your side while you waited for your girlfriend to show.
paige jumped up from her spot on the couch immediately at the sound of her name being called, she rushed into the bedroom with a concerned look on her face until she spotted you. she had to keep her jaw from dropping at the sight in front of her.
"i need your help, i can't zip this stupid dress." you groaned, reaching behind you to attempt to pull the zipper once more. paige watched you try again before coming out of whatever trance she was in and moving to finally help you.
"i got you, ma. turn around." her hands landed on your waist to guide you to turn facing the mirror. she slid her hands up your waist before reaching up to move your hair over your shoulder. you watched her face in the mirror as she stared down at you, her bottom lip was tucked between her teeth and her eyes had that familiar gleam in them.
her fingertips were cold as they lightly grazed your bare skin. paige finally took the zipper between her fingers and pulled it up till your dress was fully zipped. she wrapped her arms around your waist and leaned her head on your shoulder, meeting your eyes through the mirror.
"you're so fucking beautiful. i love this dress."
"got it just for you." you smiled brightly at her and turned around in her arms, bringing your own up to rest over her shoulders.
"damn right you did." she mumbled before pressing her lips against hers, both your eyes fluttering shut as you melted into each other. of course, paige's hands began to wander down your waist until her hands cupped your ass. she already loved how the dress brought out all your curves. her hands pulled you closer to her body, her grip on you getting tighter. your lips moved against each other perfectly, almost like you were made for one another.
although you would have loved to continue kissing your beautiful girlfriend, there was a dinner reservation waiting on the two of you. you had no choice but to pull away, leaving paige slightly panting and chasing your lips. she lightly kissed you lips again, to which you pulled away from again.
"paige," you whispered, ignoring her groan of annoyance. she reached up and lightly wrapped her hand around your throat, tilting your head while she started to kiss down your jaw. your lips parted, a shaky breath leaving you. the way she kissed and grazed her teeth over your skin had you reconsidering your dinner plans, but you knew you would be upset with yourself later if you allowed yourself to miss it. "baby, we gotta go."
"what if we just stayed home?" she spoke against your skin, her voice was nearing a desperate tone. her hand moving down and sliding under your dress, it took everything in you not to give into her.
you closed your eyes for a second before letting out a stern 'no' and stepping back away from her. paige jutted her lip out in a pout, she knew you were right though. you both had been looking forward to this date night all week and she wasn't going to cancel just because you looked good. plus, she had a surprise gift she planned on giving you over dinner.
“unfortunate, could’ve had dessert early tonight.”
˚₊‧꒰ა ꣑ৎ ໒꒱ ‧₊˚
thankfully, you made it to the restaurant just in time. the host checked you in fairly quickly and showed you the way to your table. she handed you two menus and left to give you time to look over them. it didn’t take you long to settle on what to have, you skimmed through the menu once more to finalize your decision before closing it and setting it down in front of you.
paige was still deciding on what she wanted, her eyebrows furrowed at all the choices. while she figured out what she wanted you took the change to look around the restaurant. it was a perfect setting, it wasn’t too fancy nor was it too casual. you had never been a fan of over the top, you liked simple things.
you turned your attention back to paige and you watched her facial expressions as she continued to think about what she wanted. a few minutes went by before she finally closed her menu and set it down in front of her.
“what?” she asked, now noticing how you were staring at her.
“nothing, nothing.” you smiled and shook your head. paige narrowed her eyes at you and reached across the table to grab your hand. she stared at your fingers for a moment with a slight smile on her face, specifically your ring finger. now it was your turn to question her. “what?”
she shifted her gaze to yours and shook her head. “nothing, nothing.”
paige let go of your hand as the waitress approached your table. you both picked up your menus to find your order again, the waitress took your order one at a time. she gave you both a polite smile and said she’d be back with your food.
“this is a really nice place, p. it’s not too fancy but not too casual, just how i like it.” you looked around once more before turning your attention fully onto her.
“i know my girl.” she smiled brightly at you, laughing a bit when you shook your head. you laughed at her cockiness but it was true, paige knew you better than you knew yourself. she’d taken years and years learning you and falling in love and you had even realized.
you felt stupid when she confessed her feelings for you, you were so oblivious the entire friendship but it didn’t take long to start seeing her as more than a friend. ever since then you’ve been head over heels in love with her and you wouldn’t have it any other way.
“i love you, y’know that?” you nudged her leg under the table with the toe of your heel. a light blush spread across paige’s face. she cleared her throat and sat up straight, making you perk up. the blush on her face deepened as she looked down at her lap and then back up to you. “you okay?”
“yeah-yeah im fine, i just— i really love you,” she paused, staring into your eyes and trying to find the words to express how much you mean to her. “i’ve loved you since we were in middle school, even if i didn’t really know what love was back then. becoming your friend was the best thing that ever happened to me, i still have the friendship bracelet you made me from camp that one summer.”
paige held her arm up so you could see the bracelet around her wrist. you didn’t even know she still had that. “paige, i didn’t even know you still had that. how’d you not lose it? you don’t have the best reputation of keeping up with stuff.”
“i kept it safe.” she chuckled and shrugged her shoulders, dropping her hand back into her lap. “i think that shows how much i adore you. you’re amazing, you’re beautiful, you’re always kind to me—well most of the time— and others, you’re patient, and you’re so many other things but most importantly you’re the love of my life.”
she looked down at her lap again and it finally clicked in your head what was happening, or so you thought. “oh my god, are you- paige, are you about to propose to me?”
paige looked up at you and she could see the panic on your face, she could tell it wasn’t a bad panic more so just caught off guard. she pulled the small box from her lap and opened it to show you the ring she’d been carrying around for the past few days.
“i’m not proposing, im promising—” you bit your bottom lip as you waited for her to continue, trying not to cry. “i’m promising you that i will love you until the day i die, that i will be there for you as long as you let me. i’m promising you that one day i will marry you because i want to spend the rest of my life with you and only you.”
you watched as she carefully took the ring out of its holder and reached for your hand. you gladly extended your left hand for her to slide the promise ring on your finger. your eyes dropped down to the ring on your finger and you couldn’t hold it back anymore, tears rolled down your cheek and you jumped out of your seat to throw yourself into her arms. she caught you and wrapped her arms around you, holding you tightly against her while you buried your head in the crook of her neck.
“i love you so much, baby. i can’t wait to spend the rest of my life with you.” you pulled back away from her so you could look at her face, you placed your palm on her cheek, your bottom lip jutting out into a small pout as you blinked away your tears. “you made me cry in front of all these people.”
“you still look just as beautiful.” she reached up and wiped away your tears. you shook your head and leaned down to press your lips against hers in a loving kiss. paige lightly squeezed your hip before pulling back, she studied your face for a moment before leaning back in and pressing a quick kiss to your lips.
you smiled against her lips before pulling back and sitting back down at your side of the table. you pulled your hand out in front of you and stared at the ring. “you’re gonna marry me.”
“i’m gonna marry you.”
˚₊‧꒰ა ꣑ৎ ໒꒱ ‧₊˚
paige had you pressed against the wall of the entryway of your apartment, her hand clasped around your throat while she kissed you like a woman starved. your leg was hooked around her waist and your right hand fisted her hair. she had you pressed against the wall within seconds of you opening the door, the wine must've gotten to her at dinner.
you weren't complaining about it though, you rather enjoyed it. especially when she pulled back to look at you and her lips were pink and almost swollen with how she kissed you. she had the look of wanting to bend you over written all over her face. paige's hand gripped your leg as she held it up against her hip, her thumb absentmindedly rubbing small circles on your soft skin.
"you're mine, y'know that?" she mumbled, her tongue darting out to wet her bottom lip as she admired your face before her. she could never get enough of looking at you, she'd wake up to your face ever morning for the rest of her life and she promised herself that she'd make sure that happened, hence the promise ring she gave you earlier at dinner.
you held up your left hand and wiggled your fingers, showing her the promise ring she'd given you. the smile on your face was bigger now than it ever was before. you tilted your head and blinked up at her. "I know im yours, p. come show it to me."
paige shook her head with a smile and swiftly lifted you up in her arms, immediately attaching her lips to yours as she walked you back to your room.
there were plenty of stumbles, knocks into the wall, moans, and giggles but you finally made it to the bedroom and back onto the bed. paige had made a space for herself between your legs. you were back in the position you were in earlier, your legs wrapped around her body and your arms wrapped around her shoulders.
her hands ran up your dress and under your bra, her fingers toying with your hardened nipples. you moaned into her mouth as your back arched into her, your body starting to buzz with need.
"just take 'em off, please." your voice almost a desperate whine, your hands tugging at her shirt.
"i got you, baby." she leaned up and started to pull your dress up. you lifted your hips to aid in the process of getting your clothes off for her, you sat up so she could unclip your bra. once your clothes were discarded on the floor somewhere, you began to tug at her clothes until her were all off.
you could drool at the sight of her body, your hands reached out and flattened your hands against her abs. you loved her abs, you'd riddle them more times than you could count, and every time you'd had an amazing orgasm.
pulling your eyes away from her body, you started to push your panties down your thighs but stopped midway and laid back against the pillows. "take 'em off."
paige couldn't hold back the moan that slipped from her lips, her fingers immediately hooking into the waistband and pulling them the rest of the way down your legs. after she got them down she laid down on her stomach, her mouth almost immediately attaching to the supple skin of your thigh. she kissed and nibbled at your skin as she worked her way to your core.
she looked up at you just before pressing a chaste kiss to your puffy clit, she gently wrapped her lips around your clit and gave a soft suck. your hand shot down to grab her hair, pulling her head closer into you. she started to work her tongue through your folds, moaning at the taste of you.
your head tipped back against the pillows as you let yourself get lost in the pleasure. as your moans increased in volume, she worked harder and harder to make you cum. her fingers slid through your entrance fairly easy with how wet you were.
"fuck, paige," you whimpered, your fingered tightening your grip on her blonde hair. your hips began to rock against her face, your breathing coming out in shaky gasps. "fuck- make me cum, baby. ple-please."
paige tossed her arm over your lower stomach and pressed down to keep your hips in place. she could feel your walls starting to tighten around her fingers, she wanted to make you cum, she wanted to taste you on her tongue. even though she wanted those things she pulled away right before you could, causing your eyes to shoot open and a sharp gasp to fall from your lips as your orgasm was snatched away from you.
"what the fuck?" you lifted yourself up onto your elbows and glared down at her. paige pressed a quick kiss to your inner thigh before getting off the bed.
"i wanna be in you when you cum." she shrugged her shoulders as she walked to the closet. she reached for a box in the back on the top shelf, grabbed the strap with the vibrator attached from the box and walked back out to the room.
you watched her step into the harness and fastened it around her hips securely. after she got everything situated she crawled back onto the bed in between your legs, she spit in her hand and used it to lubricate the strap. she spread your legs and leaned down to kiss you, her hand reached between you to guide the strap to your entrance.
"good?" she asked, moving her lips over your jaw and down to your neck. she settled on a spot just under your jaw and sucked a small hickey.
"yeah- yeah, wanna feel you." you groaned at the feeling of her teeth grazing your skin. you spread your legs further as she started the press the tip of her dick through your entrance. the intrusion made you gasp and shut your eyes, your lips parting and your eyebrows furrowing as she went deeper. "oh my- fuck, paige-"
as paige bottomed out she closed her eyes herself and took a deep breath, feeling the vibrations coursing through her core. she lifted her head to study your face, looking for a sign she could move. it didn't take long before you were opening your eyes to look at her, giving her a small nod of reassurance.
paige lifted herself up onto her right forearm and brought her hand down to hold your hip against the bed. she pulled her hips back and gave a shallow thrust just to hear that beautiful moan fall from your lips, and it did. she did it again and again—a bit harder and deeper each time—until she fell into a pleasurable rhythm. you grabbed a hold of her arm to give yourself something to hold on to. you could feel her muscles with the strain of holding herself up.
you and paige didn’t use the strap frequently, you were both very satisfied with just using what you had, so you often forgot how good it felt to have her in you like this.
“shit, ma. you feel so fucking good.” she moaned, her head dropping for a second. paige always fucked you so good sometimes you forget it’s not a real part of her, but in the moment it definitely feels like it. she lifted herself up onto her knees and pushed your legs back until you were almost folded. paige’s gaze dropped to your cunt immediately, her eyes zeroing in on how you stretched around her cock. “you’re so wet f’me.”
“fucking me so good—“ you moaned, your hand fisted the sheets. paige let out a groan that was much higher pitched than she what usually let out, her head tipping back and her eyes nearly rolling back in her head for a second. she looked back down at her, biting her lip as she traced her thumb where your cunt stretched around her. she used the slick she gathered to smear over your throbbing clit, rubbing quick circles.
“ohh sh-shit!” you cried, your back arching off the bed and your legs trying to close. she had picked up her pace, she was fucking you harder and somehow deeper than before. her thighs were starting to burn but she pushed that feeling aside, the pleasure that was coursing through her body made it easy to ignore. you were so close, you could feel your walls clenching around her cock.
“want you to cum—fuck—cum in me, please. please, please, please, baby. want it so bad, p.” you whined, opening your eyes to look at the girl above you. paige’s eyebrows were deeply furrowed and she was surely gonna break skin with how hard she was biting her bottom lip. hearing you beg for her cum sent her into overdrive, she lowered herself down against your body and fucked into you like her life depended on it, bottoming out each time she went back in.
her eyes were low and glazed with pleasure, she pressed sloppy kisses along any part of your skin she could reach. her thighs started to shake and her breathing got heavier, she imagined she could feel your pussy clenching and dripping on her cock and the thought of cumming in you was pushing her over the edge.
“gonna cum in you, baby. s’that what you want? hmm— gonna cum in this pretty pussy. oh my—fuck— fuck—“ she buried her head into your chest and the feeling of your fingers grabbing a fistful of her hair and tugging as you moaned her name was just what she needed.
you turned your head to the side, pressing your cheek against the pillow, had you felt yourself cumming with her. you could hear how much wetter everything was, you could feel it wetting the sheets underneath you. “yes, yes, yes, yes.”
the pleasure was almost too much for you, a stray tear falling down your cheek. you wrapped your arm around her shoulder and held her close to you as your orgasm washed through your body.
paige let out a whiny sigh as she slowed her hips to a leisurely pace, letting you both ride out your high. you let go of her hair and let your legs fall down onto the bed instead of being wrapped around her waist.
eventually she stopped completely, with a kiss to your collarbone she sat up and gently pulled herself out of you. you winced at the sound your cunt made as she pulled out, sitting up on your elbows to watch her. she quickly unfastened the harness and pushed it down her thigh, she had been getting closer to being overstimulated the longer the vibrator was still going. after she turned it off she pushed the strap to the side.
she nearly immediately laid down beside you and pulled you to lay on her chest, she loved the skin to skin contact after sex, it made her feel closer to you. she liked the feeling of sharing your body heat, the feeling of your heart’s syncing together. she loved the quiet that came after it and she loved you.
“i love you so much, can’t wait to spend the rest of my life with you.” she muttered, running her fingers through your hair.
you looked up at her with a small smile before lifting your hand to look at the ring again, your smile got bigger the more you thought about getting to experience this love with her for the rest of your life.
“me too, p.”
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