#((I CRIED TWO TIMESSS

[battlexworned]

He could feel his spark skipping a beat the moment his audials caught the first sound of their voice. Fearing for the worst in the beginning, now slowly relaxing as their voice soothed him. Blackarachnia spoke, and as usual, Ironhide listened and let them have their moment to shine bright. With each reveal, with each answer, the mech’s gaze softened greatly with a tint of shock. Whatever tension or nervous thoughts he had, it all washed away in an instant. He was on the edge of his seat– figuratively. His optics only widened at their words that said: I’m romantically interested.

Ironhide wished his processor would let him reply sooner, but that confession made him think, reflect. It brought many memories of his past he wishes to forget- yet they prevail and appear when the moment calls for it. However, unlike the many other times they appear, those memories weren’t there to torment him, but to show him:

For as long as he could remember, he’s had his tries with such an important connection as love. There were many, but they ended the same way: disconnection, anger, isolation. He was not the best mech during his youth. He had many chances, and he blew all of them with an ungrateful force. After he finally matured, seeking that bond once more troubled him, and it still does to this day. At the beginning of his maturity, he felt like he didn't deserve it, that he had to atone for how he acted and how he let his uncontrolled anger fester. Now in the present, this reason still applies, but a new one arose: His time had run out. Ironhide admits it now, he isn’t as young as he used to be, he is scarred, forever marked by the war. Why would anyone be with him who has practically seen it all? After all, he has what he wished for many years ever since the war became unbearable: A planet slowly being restored to its former beauty, friends he can rely on, a mentee he can cherish like how a father would do to his child. He has it all, so why be selfish and ask for more? Ask for someone that he can bond in such an intimate way no one else could have that luxury to see such a vulnerable side to himself? He has no right to demand. He’s just a common soldier that death will soon enough call his name once more, eventually…

But sometimes, it aches him. It crawls under his armor like how a human would feel about a thorn stuck in their flesh. An unfulfilled desire. He wants to have that bond again, he wants to be sought and loved again. He craves for familiarity, someone he could relate to and admire, someone they can touch and embrace to his sparks content. He misses the amorous words “I love you” even if the ones he heard in past bonds were half-lies or emotionless. He aches for love. If by a miracle he achieves this, he would make it his life mission to never fail. He would protect, worship and prioritize. After some time, that ache became stronger, shifting it all about Blackarachnia– a beautiful violet. Ironhide cherished them; he didn't care about how different they were. He wanted to spend time with them further, to give them the care they deserve, true royalty. Sadly, Ironhide pushed those thoughts away, thinking that the arachnid would reject it.

But there he was, glancing down at that said arachnid, who spoke about craving his company, a miracle. Meeting once under a vision’s command, now meeting each other under their own accord- no strings attached. The mech still couldn't fathom how someone like them could see and feel something so special about him. And yet- how could he refuse if he feels the same? He can't let this chance slip up, he won't be careless ever again.

His optics gleamed for a moment. A smile curved his scarred lips, a smile that some would say, it came straight from the soul. And with one of his servos he moved it and began to hold Blackarachnia’s own servo. His touch was gentle and slow, as if reassuring that no harm will come to them, never. He’ll prove it and answer with what he does best: using his actions. As Ironhide slowly guided Blackarachnia’s servo close to his lower face, he leaned even closer and finally–

A kiss, soft and gentle. The mech gave their servo a kiss as a response to the confession. Afterwards he couldn't remove the smile off his face, not like he wanted that to happen anyway. He agrees, he wholeheartedly agrees.

Looks like a sip won’t be enough to prevent his mind from scattering all over the place. The more he listened to the arachnid, a soft tint of blush appeared on his face and it was so close to expanding further. Ironhide prayed that she didn’t notice, since the glass covered a portion of his face as he drank. The way they worded things… Primus below. Their sentences were smooth and in some points, sweet. Telling him how it wasn’t only peace that he was bringing, that his presence in their life alone made them think of him countless times. And how- despite how “odd” they looked, Ironhide still showed compassion, even calling them in a respectful title. With that statement, the mech lowered his now empty glass and chuckled sharply. Complete disbelief on how they described themselves. Odd. Nope, there’s no way he’s gonna let that slide.

“ Nah ya ain’t odd, ‘nia. Far from it. “

And he meant that. Ironhide kept the rest of his answer to his processor. They were many things he wanted to say for so long, but kept it hidden for the arachnid’s comfort at the time. Like how He wanted to say that the gold and purple color were perfect on them, how elegant they were. And most importantly, how dangerous yet delicate their servos were— at least- assuming that they were. Ironhide mainly loved the violet color from their digit tips. They were captivating to watch them move and glow under a ray of light. It may seem weird, but just like before, he couldn’t help himself. Before he could think further— a soft, hypnotizing chuckle from the arachnid, and soon after:

I find myself dreaming about you for a different reason.

Oh? Oh my god?

His optics widened slightly in reaction to these words. Unbeknownst to him, that tint of blush was no longer soft, it spread. Ironhide couldn’t tell if this was a playful joke or something serious hidden under anticipation. Either way, the mech felt struck, in a flattering way. It still dumbfounded him, the fact that him of all people brought an impact on someone else in such a way. He’ll admit, despite not being new to this sort of thing, this was new. An entire experience he hasn’t felt before, it was so real this time. Ironhide began to think more on those words. A different reason, huh... It probably meant that it wasn’t a vision. What could it be… what is violet about to say? His flustered mind depends on an answer.

“ Oh really? I’m curious. What is that reason? “

[lookinggood-livingbetter]

responde a todas

1. What is your biggest turn off in a person?

being boast

2. What is your biggest turn on in a person?

appearance: nice lips; mentally: cleverness

3. Are you like your zodiac sign suggests that you should be?

most of it yes but im also a lot like my zodiac rising

4. At what age did you realize Santa was not real?

I can't remember believing

5. At what age did you have your first sexual experience?

14 i guess

6. At what age did you have your first kiss?

i was very young, I can't even remember it but 8 maybe idk

7. At what age did you have your first crush? Who was it?

i mean i still remember my nursery crush 😂 does that count? if so, his name is Henrique

8. What is the best compliment you have ever received?

"you're prettier than Rihana"

9. What is the best sex you’ve ever had?

i think it was las year

10. What is the biggest lie you ever told?

"I love you more"

11. Do you hate anyone right now?

not anymore

12. Do you have any hiding piercing’s? If yes, where?

no, don't like it

13. Do you have any tattoos? If yes what do they mean?

no, don't like it either

14. Do you miss anyone right now?

who doesn't?

15. Do you smoke?

yes

16. To your knowledge, have you ever been cheated on?

yes sir

17. Have you ever been in a physical fight?

yes, in 6º grade with a boy 😂

18. Have you ever been in a relationship?

yes

19. Have you ever been in love?

of course

20. Have you ever been loved by someone you didn’t love back?

yes

21. Have you ever loved someone that didn’t love you back?

i don't think so

22. Have you ever been betrayed by someone you care about?

is there anyone who hasn't?

23. Have you ever catfished anyone?

i think yes 😂

24. Have you ever cried over a lover?

sure

25. Have you ever danced without leaving room for Jesus?

so many timesss, i can be pretty weird when im alone 😂

26. Have you ever dated someone you met online?

never

27. Have you ever given or received a hickey?

both yes

28. Have you ever had a crush on a teacher?

no

29. Have you ever kissed a non-family member on the lips?

hm this question doesn't make much sense but yes (?)

30. Have you ever kissed for more than two hours consecutively?

god no

31. Have you ever kissed or been kissed on the breast?

yes sir

33. Have you ever lead a person on?

yes sir

34. Have you ever lied to get out of trouble?

of course, everybody does that

35. Have you ever liked a person your friend was dating?

i dont think so

37. Have you ever played a game involving stripping?

yes

38. Have you ever used somebody for your personal gain?

unfortunately

39. Have your ever been heart-broken?

for sure

40. How far have you gone to get something you desired?

too far

41. How many relationships have you had?

3.

42. What do you weight?

65 kg I think, don't measure my weight in a while

43. How tall are you?

1,55m

44. If applicable, when did you lose your virginity?

15.

45. If you could bring back a person from the dead who would you bring back?

my aunt

46. If you could choose one Disney prince to marry who would you choose?

prince eric

47. If you could choose one Disney princess to be your best friend who would you chose?

mulan

48. If you could get married to any celebrity who would it be?

dylan o'brien

49. If you could, what would you change about your first kiss?

everything, i was too young I don't even remember it

50. If you had to live in the world of the last T.V show you watched where would you be living?

rosewood

51. When was the last time you insulted someone?

i honestly can't remember

52. When was the last time you were insulted?

don't know either

53. Mention a movie that always makes you cry?

its pretty hard for me to cry watching a movie but the movie"I still believe" made me cry so

54. On a scale of 1-10, 10 being the highest, how horny are you?

6-7

55. What is the scariest thing you have ever experienced?

car crash

56. What color of underwear are you wearing right now?

not wearing any rn

57. What do you think about the most?

"I really need to live my life, experience everything while im young, I don't wanna grow old" it doesn't get out of my mind, never

58. What is a disgusting habit you have?

i was leave the hair that comes off when I brush it, stuck to the shower walls

59. What is a relationship deal breaker for you?

falling out of love for my partner

60. What is a weird thing you love?

the smell of my own farts 😂

61. What is the sexiest feature you love in the opposite gender?

mouths, the way lips moves when a person's talking or when smiling or breathing idk, im always looking at people's mouth love them and feel really attracted to lips

62. Mention something that is currently bothering you?

not receiving my university degree, finished my degree 2 months ago and still don't have it and I can't start working without it

63. Mention something that makes you happy?

hearing people's laugh of something i said, im obsessed with it

64. Mention something that makes you sad?

people not knowing how good my heart is, most people judge me incorrectly just by looking at my facial expression cause I have a cold hearted bitch face but im actually so nice and full of good vibes

65. Mention something you do when no one is watching?

ok this is gonna be real weird, can't believe im telling this 😂

I put some music and go to the front of a mirror and just start talking, and "training" facial expressions like to interpret emotions, I also dance as im in a club to see what people see when they looking at me in the club 😂

66. What is something you like to do when you are sad?

writing, not fiction just my emotions and quotes i relate to, i write a lot when im sad

67. What is the best gift you ever received?

skydiving, radical sports have my whole heart

68. What is the best gift you have ever given?

im the world's worst gift giver, i really don't know 😂

69. What is the biggest fear you have overcome?

still haven't overcome any

70. What is the longest you have ever gone without a shower?

4 days i guess

71. What is the major physical trait you look for in a partner?

lips

72. What is the worst gift you have ever given?

maybe a postal card made by myself planning a trip that never happened 😂

73. What is the worst gift you have ever received?

that strawberry milka chocolates, god I hate them and after eight 🤮

74. What is your biggest fear?

if it's a phobia, I have a terrible dog's phobia

but my biggest fear is growing old without experiencing every single thing this world has to offer, i really can't stand the idea of being old and full of regrets

75. What is your favorite holiday destination?

mykonos

76. What is your relationship with your parents like?

with my mom is really great, she's my best friend and i love her more than anyone

my dad turned "home" into a living hell, i could never, in a million years, forgive him, I used to hate him so much but right now its just a non existence relationship

77. Have you ever had a pregnancy scare?

yes

78. What is your zodiac sign?

"I'm a crazy fuckin' Gemini"

79. What was the last text you sent?

"e borboletas e merdas"

80. What was the last thing that made you cry?

I think it was a celebration of finishing college #cortejo-queimadasfitas

81. What was the last thing that made you laugh?

playing a cards game with my mom and boys

82. When is your birthday?

may, 31

83. When was the last time you cried?

may, 2022

84. Which celebrity would be your hall pass?

not sure what that means

85. Who is your celebrity crush?

i have a few, ian somerhalder/dylan o'brien/ theo james/ rodrigo floro if it counts 😂

86. Who is your favorite fictional couple?

Elena and Damon / Four and Tris

87. Who was the first person you ever fell in love with?

I think it was Rúben

88. Who was the last person you texted?

@my-0wn-feel1ngs

89. Would you ever change anything about yourself and if so what would it be?

my arms, teeth and the lil lower bump on my belly

90. Have you ever cheated on a significant other during a relationship?

yes

91. Have you ever been arrested?

no

92. Have you ever been convicted of a crime?

no

[heartandsouloc]

OC-tober Day 2

based off this lovely prompt list by @oc-growth-and-development

Day 2: Mercy

Several dozen people had been gathered inside the tent, limbs bound and huddled together. They all let out tearful whimpers, watching fearfully as shadows passed from outside the tent, waiting for the next vampire to approach and take another one away to no one knew where. (They knew where, just didn't want to admit they had been left to this fate.) Many cried, one woman wailed pitifully, all looked truly scared out of their minds. All but one.

Jan had long since moved on from grief, anger, and bargaining. Now she was fully consumed in acceptance. She had nothing more to do but stare at the canvas ceiling and wait it out. Things would be over soon enough if she waited.

She welcomed it.

Maybe a couple years ago she would have been one of the weeping woman begging and screaming for their lives, but she could not muster the energy any longer. Could not keep pretending.

Her father had always hated her. She always knew this deep down. She was nothing but an embarrassment, a rock holding him down. So, when the vampires descended on the village and demanded sacrifices in exchange for the village's continued existence, well, he certainly did not have to think hard about who to toss away first.

The wailing woman was finally tugged harshly to her feet by one of the vampire and lead away. Her fangs flashed in annoyance as the woman screamed. The sound became faint as they moved further and further beyond the tent, until there was silence. The other sacrifices quivered and wept.

Jan sighed. And waited.

Mercifully, her time came soon enough.

She let herself be pulled to her feet by the vampire. She gave no resistance as she was lead from the tent.

She felt like she was floating as she walked towards another larger tent. In the back of her clouded mind, she recognized this was her doom waiting behind the canvas flap. But mostly she couldn't process it. And the part of her that could, emphatically did not care.

Inside the tent, the vampires sat at a semicircular table opposite the flap. Their gaunt faces turned to face Jan eagerly as she walked in, still smiling as if they had been happily having some type of delightful dinner conversation. She was stopped in the center of the tent, gazelle dropped before the lions, rabbit surrounded by wolves.

The air inside the tent felt colder than outside, and stale, like walking into a refrigerator. Out of the corner of Jan's eye she could see a pile starting to form off to the side. At first glance it seemed to be old paper or canvas, but then she recognized the mummified form of limbs, bodies, their souls drained dry as the desert.

Jan waited.

“Ah, another. They just keep coming don't they? Very generous,” a tall vampire drawled, leaning back in his chair.

“You will not find me complaining. Bessst to enjoy it while it lasssstss in these timesss,” a pale wiry vampire hissed in a high pitched voice. He leaned forward towards Jan, beady eyes glittered in the firelight, beetle black, “Tell me, I am always so curious, what have you to sssay, miss? Any lassst words by chance?”

Jan shrugged, shook her head.

The vampire let out a hiss that might have been a small laugh, “Come now, that'ssss no fun...” he leaned forward more, his smile showed his fangs, two needle like front teeth, “No family to say anything of? No friendsss? I like to know...”

Jan thought dearly of a time as a child, innocent. She had friends then. But then she shook her head, face scrunched up in sudden fury, hurt betrayal finally hitting her and leaving her feeling numb and hollow, “My father is the reason I am here. I have no words for the likes of him, or any of them...”

There was a vague sound of interest from the circle of vampires. The tall one let out a bark of a laugh. “My, so bitter for one so young, I am sure it will effect your taste. But never matter, I believe we owe you the gift of a quick death for your suffering.”

They started to stand.

Jan just closed her eyes. Her lashes stuck together with tears.

“Wait.”

The whole tent paused.

A woman vampire sitting directly in the middle, the leader, who had said nothing the whole time, slowly stood. All the others sat back down in respectful silence as the vampire queen came forward. Jan finally felt fear for the first time she had come into the tent. She kept her eyes trained at the vampire's feet, one booted and one a brass prosthetic. Brass talons on the vampire queen's fake limb clicked mechanically across the ground until she stood in front of Jan. The vampire queen knelt down. The barest pressure of her long nail under Jan's chin made Jan look up into her face.

Athanasia spoke softly, only to Jan, “You are like us, aren't you?”

Jan mentally recoiled at the thought, thinking of the mummified bodies just feet away, the swath of towns she had heard had been destroyed across the region. Her nose wrinkled in disgust.

Athanasia clarified, “You are alone, misunderstood. You are judged for things you have no control over. And now you have been cast out, set to die by the people who loved you.”

Jan pursed her mouth. Said nothing.

But Athanasia saw all she needed to without the words. Jan could tell those cutting yellow golden eyes saw more of Jan than anyone else possibly ever had. Those eyes were simultaneously so alert and present, taking in all of Jan in that very moment, as she was standing before her. But they also had a far off vagueness to them, seeing beyond Jan, beyond times, beyond places, as if reading a book off of Jan's soul to see her very heart.

Jan had heard about the vampire queen's apparent talent for fortune telling, the Great Oracle they called her. She had no idea what the vampire saw exactly when she looked at her but it must have been something wonderful.

The vampire queen smiled. Her fangs caught the torchlight.

“Oh, you are an interesting one. I see many possibilities for you. Some bad, but some some very very good.”

Jan stared, mouth hanging open. She hadn't been aware she had had 'possibilities' or anything of 'interest' in a very long time.

Athanasia the vampire queen offered Jan her hand, “How would you like to be the hunter, instead of the prey?”

The other vampires looked back and forth to each other across the table, surprised, but dared not say anything against their queen. The entire tent seemed to hold its breath as everyone waited, all eyes on the wide-eyed woman on the ground. They did not have to wait too long however.

Jan smiled back and took the vampire's hand. They stood back up together.