#( sizhui x bluu )

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@battleguqin

Visage (Tsai Ming-Liang, 2009)

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If Samson is a good boy and doesn't wake up Mommy and Daddy by running around in circles barking his head off or jumping on them like a trampoline, he'll get extra early morning scritches and cuddles.

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s k y  &  s e a → a bluu x lan sizhui playlist

ocean eyes billie eilish // somebody to die for hurts // fractions jessie frye (ft. wayfloe) // it’s you altitude music // hold onto me hidden citizens (ft.svrcina) // we could be stars andreas kubler // start of time gabrielle aplin // all the way down kelela // come back home calum scott // angel with a shotgun the cab // war of hearts ruelle // oblivion m83 (ft.susanne sundfor) // we found love rihanna

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I can't stop thinking about Bluu and Sizhui slow dancing in the middle of the kitchen.

Bluu padding silently into his arms. Eyes closed, curly head finding a personal resting place on his shoulder. The two of them swaying to the music in the beating hearts. Nothing being more perfect than slow dancing, barefoot, in the dim kitchen while the rain pours outside and thunder rolls in the distance.

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@battleguqin​

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Dear Sizhui,

They say that parting is the same for feelings as wind is for a flame. It puts out the weak ones and makes the strong ones burn even brighter. Mine are like wildfire now, dearest. I regret every wasted minute when I was so close to you but never opened my heart to your kindness. When I could speak up about my feelings but remained silent, now I can see it was pointless to forbid myself to love you. It's stronger than me and the sea combined. Because you, my dearest, burrowed into my very soul. Became its other half—the best part. 

Thinking about the future, I cannot imagine it without you anymore. I'm afraid it's too early to talk about it, my dearest. And, of course, nothing will happen without your sincere desire and consent. But all my thoughts are occupied by this hope now. The hope for your and my future to be united. To be our future together. The sun is setting, and I must finish this letter. Let this paper, my words, do what I cannot do now. Let them touch your lips and maybe your soul... And tell you... how much I love you.

Forever yours,

Bluu

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Bluu accidentally calling Sizhui “Beloved” and feeling embarrassed about that slip-up, but after a couple of months, she becomes more and more comfortable addressing him as such, and every day it’s, “Beloved” this and “Beloved” that or, “DON’T YOU DARE TOUCH MY BELOVED!” and I’m so here for it.

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Response to: X

Bluu swam in and out of consciousness. She preferred “out” because then she wasn’t aware of the pain. The pain was a challenge. It was the biggest challenge she’d ever been forced to contest with, and most of the time, it left her writhing in pain and wishing for an end to the agony. There were times when the painkillers she was given were either wearing off enough to let her think but still keep the pain somewhat at bay, or when the drugs were taking hold with precisely the same result when she knew that this was the price she had to pay for surviving the attack at sea.

There was no magic healing, no easy trip back to the land of the living. She had to grin and bear it, though there was no grinning and an awful lot of bearing. Every decision she’d made in her life, every step she’d taken, had led her straight into that netting... hooked netting that sunk into her skin and trapped her until she managed to force herself from out of the trap, bleeding heavily in the process. That was the point at which she’d nearly died from her injuries and the point at which she’d been tossed back into the land of the living when fishermen had found her floating face down in the water naked as the day she was born when her injuries forced her to revert back to her human form. The old men had kindly covered her nakedness with some covering and had carried her to Blue Cove.

No detours allowed, no shortcuts from half-dead to mostly alive. Bluu remembered, with a clarity even the drugs couldn’t affect, every moment of what had happened after she blacked out. Real-time, though, was hazier. Sometimes she would hear the nurses talking when they were in her ICU cubicle, the words drifting in and out of her brain and sometimes making sense, but just as often not.

When she did understand the words, she felt a detached wonder: she wasn’t dead? That was ridiculous. The netting had been designed to kill...or maim. Bluu’s memory of the attack, or between, was fuzzy. Though a human had attacked her, it would certainly explain how she felt physically and why the agony in her side seemed to expand to every cell of her body. Someone probably caught sight of her swimming in her Mer form and thought she would be a prize worth catching. Bluu had no sense of time, what day it was, or anything beyond the bed she was on and the unceasing battle she fought with the pain. The nurses talked to her, too, explaining over and over that she had an “accident” out at sea, what they were doing, why they were doing it. She didn’t care, so long as they delivered the drugs that kept the pain at bay.

But Sizhui was welcome company and she managed a loopy smile, mind still hazy as she tried and failed to sit up and address him properly. “Got caught up in someone’s net,” she said and winced when she was overcome by another wave of pain, limbs twitching and jaw tight as she attempted to ride it out. “Someone... Someone who knew exactly what they were doing... That netting sunk into my fins deep...”

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Man, go already!

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