#( pov ren giving the weirdest compliment ever )

[erabundus]

he  can  agree  with  that  —  there  are  a  lot  of  things  in  this  world  he  soon  found  himself  DISCARDING  as  boring.  festivals  and  holidays  all  so  callously  written  off  as  something  entirely  beneath  him.  human  affairs,  the  wanderer  would  oft  say.  and  perhaps  there  is  some  grain  of  truth  to  that;  mortal  lives  are  so  fleeting  by  comparison  —  there  are  only  so  many  CELEBRATIONS  to  behold  before  death  comes  to  take  them.  yet  they  are  such  agonizingly  long  lived  creatures;  one  can  only  see  the  wonder  in  a handful of fireworks  displays  before  they  are  reduced  to  meaningless  noise.  or  unearth  the  whimsy  of  a  festival  before  each  one  swiftly  bleeds  into  the  next.  it  feels  as  though  every  other  week  humans  have  concocted  some  new  reason  to  engage  in  their  peculiar  brand  of  revelry  —  cheeks  gone  rosy  from  alcohol  and  eyes  lit  by  decorative  lights.  he  supposes  it's  merely  a  side  effect  of  living  a  life  so  long  yet  so  short.  months,  years,  decades  all  pass  much  faster  when  one  has  experienced  them  in  greater  numbers.

although,  ren  knows  he  is  also  equally  his  own  WORST  ENEMY.  it  isn't  merely  that  celebrations  stopped  holding  any  measure  of  enjoyment  for  him  —  but  rather  that  he  refused  to  let  himself  enjoy  them  at  all.  he  wanted  so  badly  to  HATE  the  world  he  had  been  forced  into  that  he  turned  away  from  its  beauty.

❝  it's  hard.  ❞   he  says  aloud,  chewing  and  swallowing  his  food.  ❝  after  a  while,  it  all  stops  meaning  anything.  ❞   silence  stretches  on  following  the  admittance.  head  tips  back  and  lavender  gaze  searches  the  sky  —  and  for  a  moment  he  tries  so  desperately  to  immerse  himself  in  the  mindset  of  that  INNOCENT  PUPPET  who  could  look  anywhere  and  still  manage  to  find  wonder  in  the  life  he  had  been  given.  ❝  however ...  i've  also  been  told  that  the  future  doesn't  necessarily  need  to  be  a  source  of  dread.  ❞   that  the  pains  haunting  him  in  the  present  will  eventually  dwindle,  like  rocks  tossed  by  ocean  waves  ground  into  grains  of  insignificant  sand.  ren  oft  swings  between  clinging  to  the  words  as  though  they  were  a  lifeline  and  regarding  them  with  skepticism.  ❝  maybe  i  should  try  to  live  by  your  example  instead  of  making  a  bigger  deal  out  of  things  than  i  need  to.  ❞   a  little  huff  punctuates  the  statement,  but  he's  being  entirely  SINCERE.

❝  a  lot  can  change  in  a  few  centuries ...  but  if  anyone  has  a  chance  of  maintaining  their  ENTHUSIASM  for  life,  it  would  probably  be  you.  ❞

Sora tilted her head to the side, frowning slightly as she took in his explanation. She'd known Ren for a while now, and she knows he's led a difficult life-- but sometimes he still surprises her with new details. Even asking how old he was seemed to bring about painful memories.

That, of course, was the last thing she'd wanted to do-- especially on his birthday of all days! A pang of guilt made her chest tighten, but she quickly stifled it. She didn't want to further sour the mood by appearing upset.

Well at least he'd told her, and now she knew that he was actually pretty young. A lot younger than she'd expected. It was strange to think that despite having a few hundred years on her he was still closer to her in age than most of her other non-human friends.

As he was talking she reached over to the box of dumplings and took one, popping it into her mouth and chewing thoughtfully. As much as she might like to she can't change the past, but the future was still up for grabs. Whatever hardships Ren will have to endure in the coming years, she could be there to help him-- if he needed her, of course.

"Well.. I'm glad you're letting me celebrate with you now." She mused, starting to look cheerful again. "I know that for people like us, sometimes it doesn't even seem worth it to acknowledge our birthdays after a certain point... but I still think they're important. If only because it's a nice excuse to meet up with friends and eat some good food!"

Speaking of good food made her reach for another dumpling-- they'd turned out even better than she'd thought. "I don't think I'll change my mind after a few centuries either. But... since I'm only twenty six now, I guess we'll see, huh?"