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#( i tried to portray this as best as i possibly could.
altruisticalastor · 6 months
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↳˗ˏˋAlastor x Readerˊˎ˗ ↴
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☒ Part One Part Two Part Three Part Four Part Five Part Six
☒ Summary: Sure, he owned you. But just because you were contractually obligated to him didn't mean you had to play nice. Alastor couldn't force you to reciprocate those strong desires of love. No matter how hard he tried.
☒ Warnings: fem!reader she/her pronouns used, hurt with comfort! call back to some scenes from part three, crying, hugs, kisses, slight toxic themes, lovesick!alastor, happy ending, different pov's and scene jumps are separated by the boarders to make it easier to follow!
☒ Word Count: 2,672
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You stumbled back to your room with an uneasy feeling pooling in your gut. Alastor wasn't a man who portrayed such extreme emotions the way he just did right before your very eyes. The sight of his smile melting off his face felt immoral. 
Your mind lamented with turmoil. 
Everything Alastor said to you was outlandish, far-fetched. Yet he spoke with such conviction, such desperation. 
This man was nothing more than a stranger to you, yet some of the things he recounted filled in those blanks you harbored through life and death.
You had been drawn to Alastor's voice since day one. Something about him did feel... nostalgic.  
And when you danced, it was effortless.
But could that just be chalked up to a coincidence?
You shook your head to rid yourself of those pestering contemplations. There was no point in dwelling on it now. At the end of the day, Alastor was a ruthless overlord. He wasn't capable of love. 
Sure, he owned you. But just because you were contractually obligated to him didn't mean you had to play nice. Alastor couldn't force you to reciprocate those strong desires of love. 
No matter how hard he tried.
And after the show he put on only moments ago... you felt more terrified of him than ever before. 
There is nothing more merciless than a man crazy in love.
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Alastor stayed up all night mulling over all that transpired. He thought and thought and thought until his mind went numb.
What could he do to make you remember him?
It's not like he could leap back to earth circa 1933 with you and retrace your steps. That world he knew was long gone. 
Love is patient but waits for no one. 
Alastor lifted himself off the carpet on shaky legs. He haphazardly smoothed out his coat and tidied his bowtie. His shadows enveloped him within a moment, ferrying him to the bar located in the foyer. 
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Husk jumped when he heard the radio warble in Alastor's voice. Demanding a tall glass of rye. The fluffy fellow knew better than to involve himself in Alastor's business. Husk poured his boss a fine glass of whiskey before turning his back. Continuing to scrub the pile-up of glasses. 
"Husker. Let's say you wanted somebody to remember something that was once near and dear to their heart. What do you presume would be the best possible antidote to bringing that fond memory back to life?"
Husk turned to face Alastor hesitantly. Taking note of the empty glass sitting in front of The Radio Demon. "Well, shit, I don't really know about that," Husk paused, refilling his Boss' glass. "I mean if I were the one who forgot, I guess a solid reminder of that missing somethin' would get the gears turnin'." 
Alastor's gaze was pointed, crimson eyes swirling with a sadness Husk had never seen from the feared demon. Husk cleared his throat before adding, "Like a photo or... an heirloom? Get what I mean?" 
Husk watched as Alastor's shoulders rose from their slumped position. His cynical grin morphed into something sharper, and his eyes now had that familiar gleam of assuredness. "Husker, my good man! You're not as witless as I thought. Thanks for the perspicuity and rye!" And just like that, The Radio Demon was gone. Whisked away by those ghastly shadows of his. 
Husk wasn't sure what he just unlocked for that evil man, but he hoped that whatever it was, it didn't involve him.
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Husker's words replayed in Alastor's mind.
"A photo or... an heirloom?"
Husker, you mindless genius.
Alastor knew now what the key to unlocking your memories would be. 
And it was in the shape of a heart, threaded on a silver chain with a photo of him and yourself nestled inside.
The locket he gifted you for your one-month anniversary. The treasure that was wrongfully swiped by that bitch, Elaine. 
It was the catalyst for your first murder. The reason you probably sunk to hell, to begin with.
Alastor had no doubt that Elaine burned in hell along with the rest of them. She was a wretched wrongdoer. Now all he needed to do was locate her. 
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Alastor had his fair share of connections in hell. One simple lift of his cane and the miserable sinners were coughing up information. A timid soul mumbled about hearing of an Elaine that fit Alastor's description. Fearfully pointing The Radio Demon in the right direction. 
Alastor chuckled to himself when he realized Elaine was shacked up at Valentino's studio— of all places. He recalls you telling him how Elaine boasted about one day becoming a picture star. 
Guess that little dream of hers came true in the most unconventional fashion. 
Alastor grimaced as the smell of sex and booze wafted past him the moment he stepped foot in the studio. Most of the bystanders turned to get a good look at The Radio Demon. Their pitiful faces were riddled with fear and awe. Probably wondering what an overlord like him was doing in a place like this. 
Alastor scanned the room begrundgly. Scrunching his nose in displeasure from the lewd displays surrounding him. Suddenly, a blonde broad caught his attention. She was sitting across the room, smoking a cigarette in her delicates. Presumably waiting til her shoot began. 
Her features were pouty and more pig than woman, but he was most certain that she was Elaine. 
Alastor approached her without hesitation, slamming his cane harshly against the dirtied floor to grab her attention. "Elaine! Oh, how unpleasant it is to see you again!" Alastor's voice was laced with faux excitement. He crossed an arm behind his back, puffing out his chest with pride. The surly woman glared at him while taking a drag of her cig. "Who the fuck are you?" 
Alastor placed a hand over his chest in mock offense. "How could you forget the face of the man who corroborated your murder? I know you weren't always the brightest bulb in the box, but I mean, come on now, Elaine..." Alastor clicked his tongue in disapproval, relishing in the fear cascading over her face.
"Look, I don't want no trouble, mister." Elaine flicked her cigarette to the side, not caring where it landed, before putting her hands in front of her chest. Her own way of waving the white flag. "Well, that's great news! Because nor do I! However, I do want my darling's locket back."
Alastor's voice became low at the end of his sentence as his irises morphed into radio dials. Elaine leaned back in her chair, trembling like a leaf, as she brought her shaky hands up to her neck. She looped her fingers around the chain adorning her throat, untucking the locket from her delicates. Alastor's eyes widened at the sight of his beloved's heirloom in the hands of this wretch. 
"Look, I didn't mean anything by it when I swiped it from your little princess. I was just jealous, alright? Now, just— take it and go!" She tugged at the chain, breaking the locket off her neck before shoving it in front of herself. Dangling it right before Alastor's very eyes.
Alastor studied the piece of precious metal before flickering his gaze back to the cowering woman. "Tell me this, Elaine. Why did you keep the locket all this time, going so far as to bring it to hell with you after death?" Elaine looked taken aback by the inquiry. She scoffed, face turning red. 
"I wanted her life, okay? She had everything I wanted. The beauty, the brains, the beau. I knew if I had this locket and had it on me always, your little princess wouldn't have been able to find it if she went snooping through my things. If I couldn't have her life— then I had to have something of hers. Something that I knew would devastate her if she lost it." Alastor let out a wicked chuckle from Elaine's confession. He swiped the locket out of her grubby paws. 
"Elaine, you... could never be her. And you are quite lucky that I have better things to do today than waste another second on you. If that wasn't the case, I would have taken great pleasure in killing you myself this time." Alastor turned on his heel, shooting her a hostile glare from over his shoulder before taking his leave. 
"Bye-bye now, Elaine! Glad to see your aspirations of becoming a picture star finally came to fruition for you. Ha HA!"
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The atmosphere in the room shifted the second Alastor stepped past the Hotel threshold. You were at the bar with Angel, having a well-needed drink, when a commotion at the front doors stole your attention. You nearly gave yourself whiplash with how quickly you turned your head in his direction. Already dizzy enough from the alcohol coursing through your bloodstream.
Alastor lit up when your eyes met his. He rushed over to the bar, wasting no time placing his hands on the stool you were perched on. He spun your chair, forcing you to face him, smiling with more excitement than you'd ever seen from him. "Alastor- what the fuck are you doing?" 
You peered up at him, eyebrows knit in annoyance from how he rudely pulled you away from the drink you were nursing. Alastor fell to his knees and leaned forward, face only centimeters from yours. "On our one-month anniversary, I gave you a locket..." Alastor's voice was laced with merriment, and you couldn't help but roll your eyes.
"Not this again- Alastor, please! Give it up." You pleaded, not noticing how Angel and Husk began to back away from the scene. Not wanting any involvement in this lover's quarrel. 
"But your bitch of a friend Elaine stole it from you, and you never ended up getting it back from her." You watched Alastor stuff a hand into his pocket, pulling out a shiny heart-shaped necklace. "So, I took matters into my own hands and got it back for you."
Alastor's free hand reached for yours. He flipped your palm to face the ceiling before placing the locket in your hand. You examined the piece of jewelry carefully, lifting it closer to your face to get a better view. "Open it." Alastor sounded positively impatient with excitement.
You gave him a weary look before thumbing over the clasp that kept the two metal hearts conjoined. You opened it slowly, and your breath hitched from what the tiny heirloom revealed.
It was a photo of a man and a woman. They appeared to be dancing in the photo. Limbs intertwined, both smiling from ear to ear. 
You weren't sure why, but the photo made your heart stutter. And the longer you stared into this moment forever captured in time, the blurrier it appeared. 
The feeling of Alastor's thumbs swiping along your cheeks broke you from your daze on the aged sentimental photo. He cooed at you, with much gentleness pooling in his crimson orbs.
Oh... you were crying? 
Alastor slowly took the locket from your grasp. You watched him expectantly as his hands reached beyond your shoulders, delicately wrapping the chain around your neck. Alastor skillfully clasped the necklace shut, restoring it to its rightful place against your sternum. 
The moment Alastor secured the clasp, you felt a surge of euphoria. A vermillion aura surrounded you, and your heart began to pound fiercely against your ribcage, echoing in your ears. That hole you had in your center for all these years began to flood.
You were motionless as your eyelids fluttered shut. In your mind, your life began to play out before you; like one of those old-timey picture shows. 
Moments from when you were alive and well flickered in your subconscious. All the pleasant memories and promises for the future were with him; With Alastor. 
In a wink, it all came back to you. Every touch, every laugh, every dance- every kiss. A groove in your heart that was wholly irreplaceable; you finally felt it again. 
The tears continued to trickle past your lashline as the sequence of core memories coursed through your head. Distantly, you could hear that familiar radio static hum. 
Your eyes flickered wildly back and forth behind your closed lids as your personalized picture show slowly came to an end. As you flitted yourself back into reality, the radio static warble grew louder. Overpowering the sound of your heartbeat; that thumped in your ears. Unhurriedly, your eyelids fluttered open.
Your world was smiling at you, and you smiled right back. 
"Hi..." You muttered weakly, laughing through the quiet sobs. Alastor continued to thumb away your tears. Crimson orbs softened as they met yours.
"Hello, my darling." His voice sounded better than it did moments before he bestowed the locked upon you. But maybe that's because you finally knew why his voice reminded you of home. 
It was because Alastor was your home.
"You waited for me all this time? Even after I was so cruel to you- why?" You brought your hands up, cupping his cheeks with care. The feeling of his cold skin underneath your fingertips was electrifying. Your body and mind had been deprived of him for far too long; each touch pleasantly overwhelmed your senses.
"Because, my dear, you are everything to me. I would have waited a century more for you if need be. Your cruel behavior only ignited my desire to reclaim your memories further. Nothing you do could ever make me stop loving you."
A lump formed in your throat from his admission. He spoke with such devotion. Alastor gazed at you; as if you hung the stars in the midnight sky. You wrapped your arms around his shoulders, sliding yourself off the bar stool. Opting to find comfort beneath Alastor's embrace.
He wasted no time pulling you into his chest, cradling you in his arms as your knees collided with the floor. Alastor nestled his nose into the crook of your neck, and you could feel his smile against your skin. "Oh, how good it is to be home." He mumbled against the base of your throat. 
You pulled back to admire his countenance, arms still weaved around his shoulders. Alastor's eyes flickered from yours to your lips. You took the hint, bearing the initiative in closing the gap. You felt heat surge through your chest when your lips touched his. Alastor's mouth moved in tandem with yours. The kiss was tender and needy; as if it was the first and last embrace you ever shared. 
Alastor's hands explored lower. Large palms smoothing down the sides of your arms, then your waist. Only pausing in his exploration when his hands met your hips. Alastor squeezed them firmly, pulling your body flush against his as he deepened the kiss. Your body felt light and airy, and it wasn't from the alcohol you indulged in tonight. 
The kiss felt like it lasted for an eternity. You only pulled away from your lover when your lungs began to scream for air. "I'll never let you out of my grasp ever again. I plan to keep you close for the rest of eternity. Just as I planned all along, my darling." Your heart lodged itself in your throat from his words. You nodded fervently in agreement as a chuckle escaped you.
"I'll hold you to it, my love." Alastor's grin softened the longer he gazed into your eyes. Slowly, he rose to his feet, lifting you to yours by the grasp he had on your hips. You let out a gasp as Alastor hooked his arms under your thighs, lifting you off the ground. He held you bridal-style, making quick strides through the foyer and up the stairs. 
"Al! What are you doing?" You giggled, holding onto his shoulders tightly as he skipped two steps at a time, all thanks to his long legs. You admired his visage from this angle, enjoying the cheerful glint that swirled in his eyes. "Taking us somewhere more private, darling. We have a lot of lost time to make up for!"
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yall want smut for the next part or..............
tags; @danveration @celestial-vomit @jyoongim @stygianoir @polytheatrix @mmik3yy @littlebullofblythe @cxrsedwxrlds @lillithhearts @nogiggleonlybitter @minniemumbles @chewbrry @lbcreations-blog @nonetheartist @call-me-nyxx @zombiesnips-blog @stawberrypimpsimp @wonderlandangelsposts @villxinmiixx @persephoneblck @maxlynn17 @littledolly2345 @karolinda007-blog @falling-endlessly @greekyoghurtwithberries @bladeismine @aloraaaxcrystalzx @doctorswife221b @scaramoochiie @fairyv-ice @chirikoheina @veroneverleft @tired-of-life-86 @saccharine-nectarine @c-thegingergirl @tsunaki @geminixbunny @softangxlicss @alleystore @sirens-and-moonflowers @fairyv-ice @honey132 @alastorsaries @zenix108 @michi-keinz @fokrilove @yourdoorisunlocked @willowshadenox @izakyun @fangirlbitch02 @kyana-chan @aquariaries @sincerely-lorely @maxlynn17 @ivebeenthearchersstuff @kurinhimenezu @memospacexx @night-shadowblood-writes2 @mariaclarade-la-cruz1 @uhhhimbored @chaotic-smol @shoyosdoll @alitaar @resident-cryptid @nijiru @sunshinesetsstuff @toby33b @th3casscad3
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dragonsholygrail · 13 days
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I’m making a nest from the twigs the birds give me. Then I’m carving big wooden eggs and leaving them in the nest. How do the bird hybrids react?
Tell me, wise one, of the bird sluts.
That’s the the best thing anyone’s ever called me omg
You appreciated the nesting gifts the all male Bird Hybrid Colony gave you more than you could possible portray. So you tried to do the next best thing. You crafted a beautiful nest from all the twigs and decorations you had gathered after every class over time.
When it was done you placed it carefully in your office. Always wanting to remind yourself how thoughtful your class was. But something was missing. The nest needed eggs now so you made some wooden eggs to go inside it.
You hadn’t thought anything of it then. And you still didn’t think of it when you sent one of the bird hybrids into your office to get a CD for the next dance you were going to be teaching.
The bird hybrid’s eyes widen upon seeing unattended eggs in your nest, not realizing they weren’t real. Excitement fluttered in his chest and he released a series of loud chirps to alert the others that someone had finally done it! One of them had finally gotten their mate to lay eggs. But it wasn’t clear who.
They return with your music quickly, handing it to you and leaning in to nibble affectionately at your neck. So proud of you for laying such perfect eggs. Their feathers ruffle as they face the colony who’s equally as excited, all of them wanting to see and care for the eggs.
One of the bird hybrids excused themselves to the bathroom, the urge to care for the eggs too great. So they go to your office instead, settling on top of the eggs to keep them warm and make sure they’re able to hatch. But they don’t want you to worry. You already did the hard work, now it’s their turn to do their part.
It happened so flawlessly that you barely realize what’s happening throughout the class. One of the bird hybrids would excuse themselves to the bathroom, they’d be gone for a period of time, and then just as they’d return another would excuse themselves.
“What did you guys do, stop at a bird bath on the way here?" You joke as you begin to notice how many of them are going to the bathroom.
The bird hybrids didn’t know whose sperm had been lucky enough to create eggs for you to lay. But no matter who it was they all love you, their lovely mate, just the same. So they all wanted to help care for the eggs. They hadn’t realized how strange their behavior must’ve seemed though.
Looking to investigate what’s going, realization dawns on you seeing a bird hybrid laying on top of wooden eggs.
“Aw, guys, those aren’t real,” you say sheepishly. Feeling bad for having to break the news to them. One of the bird hybrids wraps their arms around you from behind, nuzzling into your hair and lovingly grooming you.
“What do you mean, mate? The eggs are right there,” he rasps in your ear, his hardening cock grinding into round bottom, already looking to fill you with more of their cum and lay more eggs. You moan, feeling his length teasingly slide between your thick thighs
“I-I made them out of wood. Humans don’t lay eggs. We have to get pregnant,” you rush out breathlessly, your body buzzing with arousal as you subconsciously meet the hybrid’s thrusts.
The other bird hybrid gets up and checks the eggs himself. Seeing you were right, all their feathers ruffle in frustration. Realizing they hadn’t been successful after all.
“Well then I guess we’ll all just have to try again and again. Filling your tight cunt with our seed till one load sticks and takes root inside of you,” he growls in your ear.
Then in a flash they’re throwing your clothes off, revealing your perfectly plump body to them. Their mouths water as their claws grab at your supple flesh. Bending you over your desk they present your soaked pussy to the colony and they all watch as you clench desperately around nothing.
The bird hybrids practically fight and claw their way to get to you first, but when one of them finally sinks deep inside you, the other watch eagerly as you cry out, your body spasming. Each of them takes their time, thrusting inside your pulsating pussy with a firm precision. Their aim to breed you clear in every snap of their hips. Before the next one gets to you with the same goal in mind.
You’re a wreck as they brutalize your fat cunt, filling you up again and again with your cum. You can feel it gush out of you and onto your thighs with each plunge of their cock, only for them to fuck what they can back up inside you and replace the load with their own.
Helpless moans and cries of pleasure leave you. You try your best to writhe against them, either trying to gain a brief break or to jerk back and meet their thrusts. But either way none of them plan on letting you move. Their claws digging into your wide hips and slamming you back on their hard lengths.
You explode over another one of their cocks, roughly clawing at your own desk to help ground you. Their love and care for you brought them to each make sure you came multiple times on their cocks, the way you clenched around them always bringing them to finish. Sagging against the desk you wait for the next to come.
But instead the bird hybrids, having been satisfied they’d managed to breed you, come up and start cleaning you up. Nibbling and kissing at your soft skin. While others nuzzle and whisper in your ears how good you were for them and how perfectly your belly is gonna look all pregnant.
The bird hybrid from earlier grins at the fucked out state of you. He crouches down, his wings flapping happily as he sees your belly already rounded full of their cum. He pushes down on it, chuckling as some spills out of you causing you to weakly moan.
“Looks like it’s beginning to take root already. But if it doesn’t there’s certainly no harm in doing this all over.” His eyes look up and down your form, already hungry for more of you.
Letting you know he is ready to have you in every possible way, spilling his hot semen deep inside your cunt until you’re finally all good and bred. Not willing to stop until they’ve don’t just that.
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beneathashadytree · 2 months
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DEVOUT WORSHIPPER - SYLUS QIN X READER
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Warnings : suggestive at most (but not explicit), reader has lipstick applied but still gender-neutral!
Genre : spicy domestic fluff <3
Word count : 0.7K words
Additional notes : Just for context, Sylus and the reader are living together but often go periods without seeing each other due to work🙏🏽 Also, let me know what you think of Sylus being portrayed as Italian/speaking Italian here! Hope you guys enjoy this after the gorgeous new update🫶🏽
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“You’re exquisite.”
Sylus’ soft mumble was not left unheard. In fact, it was impossible to not notice anything about him when he was this close; so close that they could see every blemish on his fair skin, and count every delicate eyelash that fluttered lazily with every slow, seductive blink of his eyes.
They’d never get enough of his eyes, would they?
Eyes the colors of the richest blood rubies; that bled passion and want so true it warmed them to their very core. Maybe they’d never admit that their flushed cheeks weren’t just because of his enamored compliments, but also as a natural reaction to looking into those eyes they could never resist.
“That so?” they hummed, voice smaller than they thought it would come out. Somehow, there was a sanctity to this moment that meant that only hushed whispers were to be spoken between them, even if they were all alone in the safety of their own home.
Sylus huffed out a laugh that was achingly tender, all parts adoration and worship—and yet there was that same arrogance in his eyes that spoke volumes of his sheer confidence in his words. No one believed what he said more than he did. “Mm. You’ll have to take my word, tesoro.”
How sweet it was to hear from him, the endearment lilting and the syllables curling almost intimately on his tongue. Even sweeter it was, when his finger reached out to smudge at the edges of blood-red lips like his own eyes, his touch almost reverent.
“Silver tongue,” they breathed out, their gaze dropping to his sinful lips, their corners raised in an affectionate half-smile he’d only ever bare to them. Just them. It was their sacred secret to stow away between their ribs. “You’re just trying to lure me into staying at home with you.”
“I can’t say that it would be a bad idea.” The faux innocence on his face as his eyes flickered to their parted lips was almost laughable. “The place would miss you, after all.”
No matter how much they tried to play coy, Sylus could always outfox them in that game of wits—but his desires were always spelled out on his face, and this time they threatened to consume them whole.
Arching their brow at him, they reached out to clasp their hand around his wrist, tugging it away from their lips and instead taking their sweet, sweet time to interlace their fingers in an old, almost-sensuous dance that they’d mastered together, completely in step with each other. “Just the place?” they asked, a challenge hidden between every word and the next.
Something dark oozed through his eyes; a flame sparking to life behind his false composed mask. It made them feel a little smug, knowing that he’d never be able to douse that fire; that he’d always want them so terribly.
“You love making things difficult, don’t you, sweetie?” His voice was a little more gruff now, a sharpness there that reminded them that he was at his wits’ end, and that his nerves were fraying every time he was in their presence—in only the best, most delicious ways possible. “No. Not just the place.” Thumb brushing against the back of their hand, he leaned in to whisper in their ear. “Is that what you wanted to hear?”
“I can’t think of anything else that could convince me to stay,” they began to say as they toyed with the chain on his collar, “After all—”
Sylus pulled them onto his lap as he collapsed onto the bed, without even waiting for them to finish that sentence. It seemed that they’d worn out what little patience he’d had left, and he was too far gone in his amorous haze to comprehend a single word more.
“Mi dispiace,” he managed to say, though his chest heaved with the effort of restraint, and his irises were almost completely black as he stroked the small of their back with a practiced hand that had memorized every curve and expanse of skin. “I’ll come up with a better bargain next time. Now, I’m a little preoccupied with you.”
Well. Dinner could wait, they suppose.
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look-at-the-soul · 3 months
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Every little thing you do- Part 9
Tommy Shelby x reader
Series master list
Hello again! Thank you so much for the love to this series 🙌🏻 I’m enjoying so much the process for each part, and trust me, your feedback is super valuable (I sometimes take inspiration from your POV, like this part…) let’s give an amazing character the best welcome 🥰✨
Also special thanks to @blondie-22 for the gif!!!! (Always portraying what I have in mind ♥️)
Word count: 3,350
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“Are you sure you don’t want my company?” Tommy asked for the third time as he pulled in front of the market.
“No, because you’ll start complaining as I go through the stands, but I appreciate the offer.”
“And what about the basket? You’ll have to carry it by yourself on your way back.” He tried again, feeling a bit uneasy for leaving Y/N alone.
“Tom, I’ll only buy cherries, apples and sugar, grandma has the rest.” Y/N gave him a deep frown in response by his overprotective attitude.
Giving up, Tommy raised his hands from the steering wheel. “Fine, but I’ll send someone to join you anyways.”
Y/N wanted to ask if something was wrong, but deep down she knew Tommy wouldn’t tell her much, so she decided to just thank him for the ride and step down of his vehicle.
“I’ll meet grandma at the Garrison and then we’ll go over your house.” She announced leaning down.
“Looking forward for that pie.” Tommy smiled right before driving away towards Watery Lane.
The market wasn’t too crowded as she expected, people trying to sell a bit of everything invaded her personal space, Y/N tried to keep the basket in front of her tummy, in an attempt to protect her baby. She just kept walking to the fruit stands since they were in the middle…
Passing by the stand with the rugs, another one offered jewelry, the sellers were shouting, inviting everyone in, making special offers to get the customers attention.
Reaching the fruits and vegetables stands, she closed her eyes relishing in the smell for several seconds, it was hard to hide she was mouthwatering so Y/N decided to hurry up to get the items she needed and go back to start baking as soon as possible.
“Do you need anything else?” The kind woman offered, making the count in her head.
“That would be all, thank you.” Y/N noticed as more and more people started gathering at the market.
She was now aware of her surroundings, especially after Tommy explained that he didn’t trust Father Hughes. That she needed to be more careful
“Actually… do you’ve any sugar?”
The woman shook her head. “A few stands down they might have though.”
“Wonderful, thank you so much.” With a smile, Y/N paid for her items and as she was about to move forward, she almost bumped into someone. “Lee-Anne!”
“Y/N!” Her sister squealed in delight, arms wrapping around each other immediately. “What are you doing here?”
“I needed some ingredients for a pie.”
“How’s the baby? How are you feeling? Grandma just keeps me updated with bits.”
Y/N couldn’t help but look down, she should have been a role model for her sister.
“We’re both doing okay, Tommy and the Shelby’s had been nothing but kind to us… Although, I wish we could be together and I’m sorry for the way this happened.”
“Mum and Dad shouldn’t have kicked you out.” Lee-Anne stated.
“Don’t blame them, I embarrassed them…“
But before her sister could protest again, their mother’s voice resonated.
“Mum it’s fine, I was just happy to see Y/N.” Lee-Anne explained.
“Happy? How could you be happy? She doesn’t even care to keep a low profile, she’s showing her sin proudly.” Her mother’s words cut like a knife.
“Look, I know this isn’t ideal or what you wanted for me, but this is my reality now.” Y/N tried to keep her voice down. “And I’m trying to do my best.”
“Is it the speech that gánster prepared you to repeat?” Her mother shook her head slightly. “Being so close to him only confused you, to see right what is wrong by all means.”
“Why are you even blaming him now? Tommy has been nothing but a real friend to me.”
“You don’t even care that people have been talking about you hmm? Your honor rolling from mouth to mouth, having everybody in Birmingham whispering about you and him, I thought your reputation would be over as the word would spread about Scott not marrying you, but now people are wondering if the baby is a Shelby.”
Y/N gasped too shocked by what her mother just said.
“What are you talking about?”
“Please don’t even try to hide it anymore, all of that secrecy between the two of you, going out for a ride in his horse since you were younger… he acting so protective the day he took you from YOUR house without your father’s permission.”
“He was defending me!” Y/N exploded.
“That’s what they call it now?” With a scoff her mother looked away. “I overheard one of the women that washes clothes, she was talking to someone else who works for I don’t know who and basically they were gossiping about you… and him.”
Y/N was trying to process her mother’s words, taking her time to let it sink in.
Where the hell did that rumor came from? She had been so engrossed in the foundation project and her baby that barely had time to have tea and gossip about anyone.
“I never thought you’d be someone’s mistress.”
The disappointment in her mother’s statement was like a punch in Y/N’s gut, she felt anger raising inside of her.
“Who said that? That’s not true!”
Y/N felt so upset, but at the same time she tried to remain respectful of her mother, wherever she was in the wrong.
“I made a mistake, but my father shouldn’t have hit me like that, I was bleeding, had marks all over my back for days.”
“The way you behaved, what did you expect?” She found tears in her mother’s eyes. “Can you imagine how your father felt for a second?”
“And what about me? What about how I felt?”
“Don’t talk to me like that!”
Y/N let out a shaky breath slowly, trying to regain control of her emotions.
“Think whatever you want Mother.” Y/N adjusted the basket in her hands, while a tear slipped down her cheek. “Tommy saved me and my baby that day… what people think or say about me isn’t my business.”
Walking past her sister, Y/N gave her a half smile, wishing they could get the chance to spend more time together, but she understood Lee-Anne still had to obey their parents and live under their rules.
So now people just assumed she was Tommy’s mistress? How easy it is to talk about someone else behind their back and destroy the good things they had done in a few minutes. Just because Tommy decided to support her and her baby.
As if Tommy would see her differently…
Leaning against the wall after walking for a couple of minutes, Y/N finally allowed herself to crumble, the facade of strong, independent woman was slowly overshadowed by the truth, her mother was right. She wasn’t able to push away the tears any longer.
“Are you alright? Can I help you?” A soft voice called after her worryingly.
“Yes, just getting emotional over something silly. Thank you.” Y/N lied at the stranger wiping the tears with the sleeve of her dress.
The woman looked at her not buying her answer, but decided to change the subject. “I might just take a break, do you mind if I wait here?”
“Not at all.” Y/N replied absently, her mind replaying her mother’s words over and over.
She was right though, as much as she wanted to pretend that everything was alright, that she could take anything life decided to throw at her, not having her parents by her side was a consequence she never imagined, she had failed them terribly and their distance was understandable.
“Is someone you know around? You look pale.” The woman studied Y/N’s features.
Y/N shook her head. “I just feel a bit dizzy, it should pass in a minute.”
The woman looked around not really knowing what to do, what if she got sick? What if something happened to the baby?
“I’m Frances, what’s your name dear?” The woman asked trying to think of something in case she needed help. If she knew her name, at least she could look for her family.
“Y/N!” Scudboat shouted from a few feet away. “There you’re.”
“She isn’t feeling alright.” Frances explained.
The blinder took off his peak cap and started rolling it in his hands nervously.
“What’s the matter?” Polly intervened as she joined them.
“She’s dizzy, I was just keeping her company ma’am, in case she needed help.”
Polly stared at the woman for a second, before fishing inside her handbag and retrieving a small flask. “Here, smell this.”
The strong alcohol aroma hit her immediately, Y/N was fighting a silent battle within her heart. The truth that slipped from her mother’s lips, her own reality she couldn’t deny, everything came at her suddenly.
Polly wrapped her arm around Y/N, poor thing looked so lost.
“I think you need to lay down.” Polly suggested in a motherly tone, but she regretted her words, Watery Lane was full of cops searching every corner for evidence, they took Tommy and John as a warning, scared the hell out of Esme, the place was now a mess and with Tommy out of the picture, she knew Y/N couldn’t deal with that right now.
A worried look crossed both Scudboat and Polly’s eyes.
“My place isn’t far away.” The kind Frances offered shyly. “It isn’t much, but she can rest for a while.”
“Yes, wonderful idea.” Polly exclaimed relieved.
“You’re an angel.” Y/N added knowing she really needed to calm down.
“This way, please.” Frances smoothed her skirt, before offering her hand to Y/N. The blinder following their steps carrying the basket.
And it was indeed very close, the kind woman immediately offered Y/N to lean against the cushions and lift her feet up.
“Can I offer you water or some tea?” Frances asked walking towards the window to let some air in. “My home is modest, but there’s always food and tea for anyone.”
Polly thanked her for her thoughtful gesture but had to turn down the tea offer.
“Sorry for the inconvenience, but I really need to go out right now.” Polly apologized, thinking she needed to sort out everything at the betting shop.
“Oh, she can stay here, I live by myself.”
“Polly I don’t want to give Frances any troubles, I’m fine.”
Polly shot Y/N a knowing look. “You need to rest.”
And with that, Y/N knew she wouldn’t win that argument. Polly was the boss and she had to obey.
“What were you buying if you don’t mind me asking?” Frances asked Y/N with interest once that Polly and Scudboat left, she brought the girl a biscuit, the last one she had for the week.
“Some cherries and apples, my grandma and I would bake a pie but I forgot the sugar.”
“I could give you some.”
Y/N lost it in that moment, she started crying inconsolably.
Without asking anything else, or pushing her to talk, tentatively Frances rubbed Y/N’s back in a comforting motion.
“Sorry.” Y/N sobbed, embarrassed by the sudden outburst. “I’ve just been holding it for so long.”
“What is it?”
“Moments before we met at the market, I had an unpleasant encounter with my Mother, she doesn’t approve nor support my pregnancy. I hadn’t seen her for several weeks and I know, I know this is far from the ideal happy family but there’s nothing I can do to turn things around, we had a disagreement and I guess that made me feel sick.”
Y/N took a deep breath and looked at Frances through her wet lashes. “I’m just touched by your generosity, a complete stranger offering me a hand when my own blood doesn’t care about me nor my baby.”
Frances studied her for an instant, then covered her hand in hers.
“I’m sure your mother loves you and this baby, but she’s tied to strict society rules.”
“I wouldn’t bet on that, she does just as my Father’s says, she breaths if he says so.”
“Why don’t you tell me about this woman, Polly?”
Y/N’s eyes sparkled. Polly had always been like an aunt to her, she always had a comforting hug to offer and a word to say when things were wrong.
“She’s Tommy’s aunt, they’re my chosen family now.”
Taking a bite of the biscuit that Frances offered, Y/N adjusted herself to face her. “May I ask about you Frances?”
“We’ll I’m just a newly widow, I went to the market get the ingredients to make jam and tomorrow I’ll go from house to house to sell it.”
Y/N swallowed hard, she was only noticing her completely black attire. How hard it must’ve been to lose her partner and finding a way to make money.
“I’m really sorry to hear that.”
“Thank you. There are good and bad days, but I need to do something to have an income.” Frances let out. A heavy sigh. “I’m running out of my husband’s savings.”
Y/N gave Frances a smile full of sympathy, thinking of a way to help her.
“Can I help you to make the jam?” She offered.
“Only if you’re feeling better.”
“Well if you’ve the courage to make and sell jam, the least I can do is try to help you.”
She always wanted to learn to make jam actually and this was exactly what she needed right now to clear her mind and focus on something to find some peace.
“Do you mind if I ask you who is Tommy?” Frances asked with interest as she started cutting the fruits she’d use for the jam.
A genuine smile spread rapidly among Y/N’s lips. “He’s the best man I know… picked me of the ground and provided me with more than I deserve.”
Frances noticed how the young girl’s eyes lit up as she talked about this man, she assumed he wasn’t the father but a very close person to her heart, but decided to not cross the line and ask anything too personal.
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Hitting the steering wheel with his fists, Tommy cursed under his breath. For being so weak, for not anticipating his enemies moves.
The moment that Hughes mentioned Y/N and her baby before Tommy was released from the cell, he felt his blood raising, tensed, alarmed and scared for the first time. He didn’t like the fact that Hughes knew about Y/N, the threaten he slipped didn’t go unnoticed by Tommy.
“It would be a shame that poor Y/N goes through the same that happened to your aunt…”- he had been so close to punch him in the face and smash his head against the brick wall, but Tommy knew he was trying to provoke him.
Parking outside Arrow House, he stormed inside the property, terrified to learn by Hughes that they delivered the baby’s furniture that afternoon.
Aware of this failure to protect her, Tommy rushed upstairs, heart pumping against his ribs, worry installed on his shoulders.
Finding Y/N stepping outside her bedroom, she was telling him about the furniture delivered and that her grandma had been visiting earlier, but he went straight to the crib, frantically looking for something.
“What’s wrong Tommy?” Y/N asked not understanding his actions.
“Has someone been here?” He demanded out of breath.
“Just the delivery men.”
As he lifted the mattress, he stopped abruptly at the sight of a card.
There it was, the direct threat towards an unborn child. Tommy decided to hide it inside his suit jacket. Defeated, he walked backwards until his body found the opposite wall.
“Tommy?” Y/N’s voice trembled. “You promised to leave the illegal stuff behind.”
“And I’m trying, I swear I’m trying.”
Y/N saw his recklessness fade away, he was just a man trying to do the right thing, but it was just him against the world.
Eliminating the space between them, Y/N caressed his face.
“I know you’ll keep us safe.” She assured him. “Hmm?”
Fixing his eyes on her, he knew he’d get a bullet for her in a heartbeat.
But now he could only think of her baby, Y/N couldn’t even come close to imagine the risk she was facing.
“Listen to me…” Tommy stated breaking their embrace, taking her face between his hands. “I won’t let anything happen to you, do you understand?”
Not waiting for an answer, he kissed the top of her head softly and pulled her back into his arms. Looking around the nursery, it was slowly coming together, it now had the furniture, Y/N talked about knitting a blanket and her grandmother was making a piece for the baby.
He needed to find out who the hell leaked Y/N’s information to Father Hughes and how did they manage to walk into his house to place that note in the crib.
And he needed to do it before they could hurt Y/N and her baby.
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Two days later, she was back to thank Frances for her kindness.
“I won’t take long.” Y/N announced at Tommy’s driver. He had been adamant about her not being alone for a second so now she had a chaperone watching her every move.
It had been a busy day at the institution, Y/N had lots of work to do, unfortunately she had been feeling sick most of the morning, so she gave up and decided to get some air. Heading to the market, she bought a sack of flour, vegetables, eggs, milk, a couple of fresh baguettes and headed towards Frances’ house.
It wasn’t her intention, but since the window was open, she overheard the conversation unfolding inside.
“If you know what’s best for you, you’ll accept my proposal.” A man said before walking outside.
Y/N tried to pretend she was knocking on the house next door and waited until the man was out of her eyesight to call out for Frances.
“Frances, are you alright?”
Y/N rushed without waiting to be invited inside, leaving the basket next to her feet.
“No… that man says my husband, my Bert gave him the papers of our house in exchange for some money he needed, but he didn’t get the chance to pay for the loan.” Frances cried.
A gasp escaped Y/N’s lips, this was a mess.
“Take a deep breath.” Y/N proposed not knowing what to do. “Do you’ve someone who can help you?”
“No… I’m on my own.”
With a sigh, Y/N took a look around the small unit, Frances came from a harder background than her, her whole house was the size of her living room, and she had everything there; kitchen, bathroom, bed and the living room. Pondering in the options, decided to do what Tommy had done for her; help without asking questions.
“Why don’t you prepare a bag with your essentials and we’ll figure out the rest later.” Y/N proposed straightening her back.
“But I’ve nowhere to go.” Frances explained.
“You do, I’m taking you somewhere.”
Eventually, they arrived at the Institution, Y/N explained Frances she could stay there while it started operations, it wasn’t properly a house, but there was a sofa to sleep on, and a kitchen with the utensils she might need.
“How can I thank you for this?” Frances needed answers, feeling overwhelmed.
“No need, you helped me the other day… I’m just returning the favor.”
She would see later if there was an open position that Frances could take either at the Institution or the betting shop with Tommy, but for now, she had the day covered.
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Next part
🥰 I hope you enjoyed reading this part! Let me know in the comments what you think? ✨
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lumi-nescentt · 10 months
Text
Heaven Is A Place On Earth With You
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Pairing: Max Verstappen x Reader
Warnings: slight sexual joke at some point
Words: 1.8k
Summary: The Max everyone knows is a lot different from the Max he is behind closed doors. That's even truer when he hasn't seen you in a while and all he wants is to spend time doing nothing with his girl.
A/N: I'm procrastinating for my finals so I'm going to try to finish all the WIP I currently have :) hope you like max being hopelessly in love bc that's what you're getting here
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Max was known for being blunt, sometimes rough which on track made him almost unstoppable. However, the Max you knew was way different. He treated you with such care and delicacy, it was sickeningly sweet. From the moment you two had started dating, he had done his best to show you that he wasn't what the rest of the world portrayed him to be. That he was worthy of the affection you felt for him.
Slow mornings with Max were your favourite moments. He always woke up before you but he never dared to leave the bed before you wanted to. He didn’t particularly liked laying around but there was something about being close to you that made him want to stay there forever. You looked so peaceful cuddled up against him, he wouldn’t have dared to wake you up anyway. He much preferred admiring you until you woke up and he could finally talk to you.
When your eyes started fluttering awake, the first thing you were aware of was the arm around your waist. Max's hand was on your naked back, keeping you as close to him as possible. The weight of it was comforting and it was always the first thing you noticed when he came back late at night while you were already asleep, from races you couldn’t have gone to. You liked knowing that even when he was exhausted from all the travelling, he still took the time to nestle your body against his before falling asleep with you between his arms. 
As soon as he realised you were awake, Max started peppering the side of your face with kisses which made you giggle and look up at him. There was something really special about the look you gave your boyfriend when you were slowly coming back to reality that he loved. It always looked as if you were falling back in love with him all over again in a matter of seconds. You had the softest look on your face and as far as heart eyes went, yours were probably the most intense someone ever had until Max looked at you with the same intensity and his entire face lit up, his eyes twinkling with pure adoration before he broke the silence and finally spoke.
-" Good morning schatje" he greeted you with a kiss on your forehead
-" Hi Maxie" you mumbled, still sleepy
-" Did you sleep well ?"
-" I alway sleep well when you're here so yes. How about you ?"
-" Great, I had the best human heater next to me."
-" Do you have anything planned today ?"
-" Nope, I'm all yours. Did you want to do anything special ?"
-" Just wanted to stay with you."
-" Do you want me to make breakfast and then we can go walk on the beach ?"
-" That sounds good."
-" Lets go then." Max said, trying to stand up from the bed but you had moved your body half on top of him
-" Schatje, if you want breakfast you're gonna have to get off me."
-" I thought you liked me on top ?" you winked, making the Dutch man blush
-" I do but I also like you alive and well fed so hop off please."
With a groan, you turned on your side, liberating Max who stood up. He tried to convince you to follow him in the kitchen but you needed a few more minutes so after kissing your forehead, Max went to cook breakfast alone. He didn’t mind doing it on his own. Taking care of you when he was here was one of his favourite things to do just to see you smile at him and have you kiss his cheek as a thank you. It was all worth it for your reaction alone. 
Five minutes later, Max felt a pair of arms snake around his waist and your face pressing against his back. He still hadn’t put a shirt back on after sleeping in boxers all night. He never wore much to bed since you were always warm enough for him to sleep almost naked and not freeze. So when you pressed small kisses against his shoulder blades, he almost let go of the coffee cup he was holding, your breath tickling his skin. 
-“ Behave please, schatje.” Max smiled, patting your hands that were resting on his stomach
-“ ‘m not doing anything.” you answered, tightening your grip around him
-“ Not yet but I know you might try something so if you want to eat decent food please wait until I set everything on the table.” 
-“ Can’t promise anything.” Max laughed at your answer before going back to what he was doing. 
Since you had moved in with him, Max found out that he actually didn’t hate slowing down for a bit and enjoying the little things. He just never had someone he loved to do it with until you came along. Now, he loved just hanging around in the apartment, bodies dancing around each other in the kitchen when you were both doing your own thing but still enjoying each other’s presence. He found solace in doing the most mundane things with you. He wouldn’t dare to say it out loud but as long as you were together, everything felt like an adventure. 
Enjoying breakfast together while looking out the balcony was a great way to start the day according to him, maybe even his favourite. You were apparently in a good mood too judging by how playful you were being, stealing bits from his plate with a grin and teasingly nudging his shoulder with yours. If it had been anyone else, Max would have protested a little but there was not much he would get angry at you for so he let it slide, stealing something back for good measure. 
He could have completely forgotten about the walk on the beach he had promised if you hadn’t rushed to get ready as soon as you had finished eating. He followed you with a laugh, trying not to blush at the sight of you in a pretty sundress with your hair falling down your shoulders. You looked radiant with joy and it suited you all too well. Max was glad his actions made you feel this way. In fact, he wasn’t just glad, no. Max was proud to be able to make you happy in a way no one else did because if at first he hadn’t thought himself capable of fully giving you the love he thought you deserved, he now knew that you wanted whatever he was willing and capable of giving you. 
You were more than content with the amount of love you received from your boyfriend and you made sure to make it known and to return the attention because despite his tough exterior, you had been around the Dutchman for long enough to know that there was nothing that touched him more than being loved openly and freely, without conditions. 
The car ride to the beach was spent in comfortable silence, Max’s hand on your thigh as you looked out the window, feeling the wind caress your face. Max tried to steal a few glances your way while he drove but his eyes never stayed long. He was way too careful when he was the one responsible for your well-being. You had tried teasing him about it to make him relax but he was adamant that as your boyfriend, he had to make sure you were as safe as possible. 
You couldn’t really argue with that so you let him be, knowing that as soon as he’d be done driving, you’d be able to play around again. So the moment the car was finally parked, you were bolting out the door, screaming that the last one in the water would be a terrible loser. It didn’t take long for Max’s brain to compute but by the time he started running, you already had a good lead.
However, you hadn’t considered the fact your boyfriend was a literal athlete and that his cardio was considerably better than yours. Before you could even reach the water, Max had catched up to you and effortlessly picked you up, still going towards the sea with a grin on his face. 
-“ Please Max, put me down. Don’t throw me in.” you screeched as he kept jogging lightly
-“ You should have thought about that when you cheated, you little minx.” Max responded, poking your side with his finger as you laughed 
-“ But I had to, otherwise I had no chance of winning. You’re too quick for me, Mr. World Champion” 
-“ Flattery won’t get you anywhere now, schatje. It’s too late”. Max smirked before dropping you in the water, jumping right behind you as you swam further away, your boyfriend close behind
-“ I hate you so much.” you lied, wrapping your arms around his neck, trying your best to swim at the same time before Max wrapped your legs around his waist, bringing you even closer
-“ For the record, I might have let you win if you hadn’t cheated or made me watch you undress and run at the same time.” the Dutchman smiled, pecking your lips 
-“ Who said I lost ?” 
-“ You were the first one in the water, baby. That makes you the loser of your own game.” 
-“ Maybe it was my plan all along…”
-“ y/n, you’re the sorest loser I know. There’s no way you’d plan to lose.”
-“ Well, I don’t care. I’m in your arms right now and we’re at this beautiful empty beach. I intend to make the most of this situation I definitely planned for and kiss you until you get sick of it.”
-“ Sure, whatever helps you sleep at night.” Max chuckled, his whole face lighting up “ We’re going to be here for a while then because I don’t think I could ever get tired of kissing you.”  
-“ Alright then, the first one to stop is a terrible loser.” you smiled with a toothy grin
-“ Schat… Are you sure you can handle another loss today ?” 
-“ Bring it on, lover boy. Less talking, more kissing.”
-“ You don’t have to ask me twice.” he mumbled before pressing his lips against yours, brushing your wet hair away from your face
Maybe you lost the first game but when a family arrived at the beach and their little boy somehow recognised your boyfriend from afar and practically screamed that Max Verstappen was here, Max had to let you go. He wasn’t a fan of PDA, even less when it was around fans but in that moment, he wished he was just to erase the smug grin on your face when he lost the stupid challenge you had set. 
Before heading over to see the boy, Max made sure to peck your lips. He bit your lower lip slightly, not missing the way your face flushed when he did before asking for a rematch when you were back home. You already loved how the day had started but now you were sure that the rest of it would be just as good, if not better. This was just another thing to add to the list of why being home together was your favourite place to be.
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acoraxia · 10 months
Text
What are your thoughts on shadowpeach?
Fandom wise? I do not care for it.
Canon wise? I believe in men committing crimes while forming the most toxic, unhealthy attachments to one person could lead to such a dysfunctional relationship that it, eventually, turns into a functional one. And also they’re trans and aspec.
Disclaimer: this is all my opinion and people can do whatever they want, i simply have my gripes with some of the fandom stuff. this is just me explaining what i like and dislike about shadowpeach.
I think the most common thing people fall into when it comes to ships—or shipping in general—is how to domesticate these two characters without fully addressing their flaws, personalities, behavior, and their overall choices throughout the original media/show they come from. 
Macaque and SWK both suffer equally through this mischaracterization: Macaque is often painted as this shy or “edgy” character with little to no ties to his actual character in canon and, more often than not, he is perceived as this “dad” type of character when, in fact, he should not be allowed near children for I fear he will bully them nonstop until they sit there in the corner feeling disheartened and miserable about themselves; Sun Wukong is often portrayed as this dumb himbo with little-to-no means of understanding social cues, not understanding emotions in a way that’s very frustrating, and be this yearning, pining idiot who’s still longing for his childhood crush when he did not hesitate to punch this guy in the face multiple times throughout the show. So when they are paired up together it’s this weird mash of people believing Macaque is the better dad with more understanding of human behavior and Wukong is his dumb, doting husband who’s doing his best and cannot stand up for himself when confronted about things.
The amount of times people choose to make Macaque sympathetic by having Sun Wukong’s family side with Macaque when it comes to Wukong’s actions/choices is so vast I could not count them all on one hand. The common trope of having Princess Iron Fan (Sun Wukong’s sister-in-law) become Macaque’s sworn sister is so disheartening to see for someone who read through Journey To The West and thought of how silly the overall family dynamic of the Demon Bull Family and Sun Wukong’s troops was. Removing Iron Fan as Sun Wukong’s literal sister just to have someone backup Macaque and sympathize with him is funny and a bit silly. 
That being said… the canon version of Shadowpeach and its possibilities are, in fact, very delicious.
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Canon wise this is what we know about Sun Wukong and Macaque’s history together: 
Sun Wukong and Macaque meet
The brotherhood is formed after Azure meets Sun Wukong, Macaque tags along with Wukong (note: Macaque is not addressed as “brother” by the characters, only Wukong is)
Macaque tries to warn Wukong about how dealing with Heaven might be a bad idea
They share a peach under a tree; Wukong reassures Macaque this plan will work
Wukong carries on with Azure’s plan anyway (yes, azure lion’s plan, not wukong’s)
The brotherhood is defeated and Wukong gets trapped under a mountain
Presumably no one comes to visit Wukong, only Macaque
During his final visit, Wukong is angry that Macaque is free and can’t see the fact that Wukong was trying to do everything for them and his kingdom
Macaque snaps back at Wukong and calls him an obsessive demon before leaving
They have another fallout and fight
Wukong ends up killing Macaque in the aftermath
500~ years later, Macaque and Wukong fight again with Wukong being more apathetic towards their reunion than Macaque is
Macaque obsesses over Wukong continuously (coughs)
Macaque is biased in his retellings of his and Wukong’s relationship (see: all of shadowplay and the scrolls memories)
They fight (again) throughout S3
They somewhat reconcile by the end of S4
We will address the fact Sun Wukong was groomed into going to war by this former celestial warrior instead of having it be because of his own want to protect his family and friends after Heaven refused to pay him the respect he wanted when he first joined their ranks later. Right now we focus on the fact that Sun Wukong is canonically a person people easily fall in love with (platonically) and have a tendency to want to stay close to regardless of what his future actions will be like and Macaque is sequentially obsessed with him throughout the show.
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“The hero and the warrior were like the Sun and the Moon. Their light, a protective glow, shining upon the world. Together, there was nothing that could stop the two of them. Either in the Celestial Realms or on Earth. As time went on, the hero attained power beyond comprehension. As the hero's light grew, so too did his shadow. And soon, the warrior was cast in that shadow. In the darkness, the warrior was forgotten by the hero.”
Fun fact: Macaque is never going to be on par with Sun Wukong’s power and he works best as support than he does a duo-attacker along side Wukong. Wukong is on his own power level and Macaque, while being able of holding his own against enemies, could be stomped to death by Xiaoijiao is he crossed the line.
Macaque’s obsession with Sun Wukong comes from the inability to move on from the past; Macaque wanting things to go back as they were is a subtle theme going through the show — he keeps latching on to biased memories and avoiding the actual problems that caused their relationship to fall apart and it isn’t until Season 3’s big confrontation with Long Xiaojiao’s Samadhi Fire ritual. He realizes he abandoned Wukong during a time of need and proceeds to flee, abandoning him again. 
Macaque has issues. More often than not people call out on Sun Wukong for abandoning Xiaotian or the Monkie Kid Crew all while ignoring the fact Sun Wukong does not purposefully leave Qi Xiaotian, he tries his hardest to make it back in time and is visibly scared/horrified when LBD attacks in his absence. Sun Wukong tries his hardest to comfort Xiaotian while Macaque tries to torment him. 
Regardless, Sun Wukong and Macaque’s relationship is unique to most media’s portrayal of friends turned enemies. Because Wukong does not see Macaque as a threat up until he teams up with Lady Bone Demon — he is only scary by association, not by anything he has done up until that point. You can tell with the way Wukong mocks him and calls him something akin to a puppet during their interaction in Season 3 when Macaque trapped him and Nezha in the ice. 
And even then Macaque doesn’t even bother trying to engage with Wukong in a friendly manner because kindness is for losers HA i’m not apologizing for anything, bye Sun Wukong, you big old LOSER [proceeds to possibly live on the streets and stay homeless until wukong allows him to return to ffm under certain house rules]
You’ll notice that Sun Wukong barely has any opinions on Macaque.
This is because Macaque is favored by the narrative more than Sun Wukong is so we have very little context as to how Sun Wukong genuinely feels towards Macaque. 
Sun Wukong sees Macaque as an annoyance, a bother, a threat, a coward, an imposter and then, finally, an ally. 
But all we get from that is Wukong handing Macaque a peach-flavored ice cream pop as a parallel to him sharing a peach with his old friend back when they were young monkeys before he was trapped under a mountain for 500 years as a result of his abuser’s power hold on him that forced him to fight heaven as a way to “make the world a better place”. 
We love to see it.
Macaque and Wukong’s relationship goes from mutual interest and a supportive friendship established years prior to the original building of the brotherhood to a very weird, uncategorized type of dynamic. The only way to characterize Sun Wukong’s “affection” towards Macaque is, possibly, the same way most people would characterize Macaque to be towards Wukong. Y’know the slightly judgmental actions and eye rolls and scoffs of affection most people write about Macaque when Wukong does something stupid? Yeah.
“But Macaque said “this guy” when Wukong was presenting his plan to defeat Azure—“ yeah have you considered Wukong does a lot of masking in the presence of the entire Monkie Kid Crew and Macaque has a tendency to present himself as this cool persona when in fact he’s just a homeless monkey who’s been crashing on his ex’s couch for the past weeks since the ending of Season 3? 
“OK…. but why QPR Shadowpeach?”
Sun Wukong throughout the course of Journey to the West and all its past and future iterations have always had him be uninterested in both men and women. There are multiple instances where he’s capable of courting women and he instead backs away or does not pay it any mind; aside from this he’s heavily implied to only care about familial love and friendships. He does not see his pilgrim brothers as anything more than family and he views Tripitaka as a mentor rather than someone whom he was chained to. And Azure was his idol and he was groomed by him, and everyone else was viewed to him as a troop — or, y’know, a family.
This and the fact that— both Sun Wukong and Macaque are over a thousand years old. Why on earth would they have a normal type of relationship? Giving them a checklist of what passes on as romantic and platonic when to them the line is so blurred it’s barely existent to them is amusing. 
Sun Wukong and Macaque having their own weird relationship where it changes from frustrated best friends to partners to angry middle aged demons to the tired traumatized immortals who sometimes cuddle while still beating each other up is so deliciously interesting and unhealthy to the point where it is healthy. 
Also Celestial bodies are not the same as mortal bodies; canonically Sun Wukong has transformed into women before and people have addressed him with female-leaning pronouns before. my personal headcanon of sun wukong being genderfluid lves on and now we can have sapphic shadowpeach with transfem macaque.
also im still feverish so if this doesnt make sense then too bad damn im sorry
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tyunkus · 1 year
Text
perv
pairing: bf!huening kai x fem!reader summary: maybe kai is more of a pervert than he lets on. maybe you like it.
wc: 2.2k 
warnings: reader is fem!bodied and referred to as a girl multiple times!!! dont read if that makes u uncomfy pls! there is also: established relationship, both of you are horny af Thus the references to being a perv and whatnot, making out, LOTS OF BEGGING from both reader n hyuka kinda, dirty talk (praise with elements of degradation n humiliation), pet names (baby, angel, good girl), penetrative, No condom (practice safe sex lovelies), not rly breeding but breeding-adjacent (hyuka comes inside u <3), some stuttering i guess cuz kai is nervous n opening up his sexual horizons but it’s all cute and mushy, kai talks a lot in this he can’t shut up ur pussy’s too perfect babe
note: less plot than amazon wishlist sorry hehe i just wanted to write cutesy kai trying his hand at dirty talk with his perfect sexy gf (you)! i love him so bad guys i tried to portray him as best as possible but i might have failed miserably and if i did you’re allowed to egg my house ALSOOOO kinda rushed and not proofread and unbeta-ed im so sorry the ending SUCKSSSS
ALSO! if you were wondering why it seems familiar i based this ask off of the draft for this
“Can I kiss you?” Kai asks.
He always asks first, even though he knows you will always say yes. And you always feel so fluttery whenever he does, even though you’ve kissed him so many times now his lips feel familiar when they nudge against yours. It usually starts out like this—just the two of you on his bed, straddling his hips as he looks up at you. He says it’s his favorite perspective of you, which you’re not sure you understand. But Kai is always firm in his opinions of you, so you don’t mind.
“Please, please,” you say, and so he does, lips slotting against yours, soft, soft. Kai makes a quiet noise, reaches up to brush away your hair. His hands, so large and warm where he keeps them on your waist, just above your hip. 
“So pretty. My pretty baby,” he murmurs, and your heart sings. You bunch your hands up in his shirt, breathe him in. You want to bite him.
“Kai. Kai.”
“Yes? Hm?”
“Please. I want—I want—” The worst part is you can’t even verbalize what you want, either, but you’re squirming and panting on his lap, lips slick with his spit, and there’s honestly not many messages that those movements could possibly allude to other than I want your cock. “I—please, Kai, ah.”
“Gonna make me crazy,” Kai says, voice teetering on a whine. “Your noises. So cute. Want more, pretty? More?”
You kiss him again, drinking in his words, running your hands through his hair. Cute, cute. He’s breathing heavily, nose bumping against your cheek. Hours, you could spend hours just kissing him. Cute. You don’t realize you say it out loud until Kai makes a high noise at the back of his throat.
“Angel—so beautiful—I wanna—ah, can I, please—”
You take his wrist, guide his hand to the waistband of your pajamas. “Can you?” you ask, almost beg, your fingers trembling where they fold around his wrist. “Kai, please, I want you to touch me.”
You trail off when you see Kai’s expression, tentative and unsure. “Baby,” he whispers, tipping you down towards him so he can press a mountain of kisses against the column of your throat. His hand brushes over the hem of your underwear, soothing the divide between skin and bright pink lace. The warmth of his hand ghosts over you, where you ache the most, and you try not to sound too pathetic when you whine. “Baby, baby, shh, you know I want to.”
“Then do it,” you plead, your legs practically shaking with how badly you want it. Need it. You could hate him for not giving it to you. You could, but Kai likes good girls, and that’s what you are. What you want to be.
“Be a good girl,” Kai instructs, gently, his voice wavering still. There it is—Kai’s kinks slipping through the cracks. Finally, after you had to go through all the work to shatter it yourself. He’s still so shy about it, sounding so unsure when he talks dirty to you, but you can tell he finds it hot, with how red his cheeks get. “Not now, baby. Be good for me, don’t you want to be good?”
“Please,” you plead, completely ignoring him, inching the tips of your fingernails up and down his chest, his shoulders, his throat. You lean down until your face is practically buried in his hair, and you can feel his breath hit your tummy, his hands pressing down on your waist. “Kaaaaaiiiiii.”
But he only giggles brightly, face breaking into a smile against your skin. He loves this, gets off on this dynamic—you are normally the one taking the lead, but in here, like this, it’s Kai who gets to play with you the way he wants, coax reactions out of you with every touch. Treat you like a princess, be in charge, because it’s only in bed that he wants to. You can order him around during the daytime as much as you like, as long as he gets to fuck you up the way he wants.
“Want it that bad, sweetheart?” he murmurs, planting a kiss on your tummy. “So bad you’re practically gagging for it, huh? Want something else to gag on?”
You squeeze your eyes shut. “Shut up,” you cry, heart fluttering at the way he giggles right after. “Fuck me first, please, I want it so bad.”
Kai coos at you, rubbing his hands along the sides of your thighs. “I know, baby, I know. Let me flip you over, sweetheart, I’ll take care of my cute baby.” And so he does, gently lifting you off of his crotch and letting you land softly on your back; he slides you a glittering smile, then settles his hands between your legs once again. “Want me to finger you first?”
You nod. “Anything, want anything. Please. Just you.”
Kai hums. “Anything? What if I made you get– get off on my thigh, hm? I…” He trails off here, steadies his breath. You can see the way his gaze trails down your body, hungry, wanting. “What if I used one of your cute toys on you, took it away right before you came? Would you… would you still want that?”
“Don’t care, Kai, just want you—you can do anything, anything, please—”
Kai groans and buries his face in your neck, thumbing over your clothed cunt. “F-fuck, baby,” he rumbles against your skin, feeling his fingertips dip inside you, slippery with your wetness. “So worked up over— over just a bit of touching, fuck, what a cute baby. So horny for me, for my cock, right?”
You let out a moan, your hips bucking up to meet his fingers. “Mhm, yes, Kai. Give me, give it to me.”
“Okay, okay, I will.” Kai presses a kiss to your cheek, so unfitting and filthy compared to his fingers rubbing over you. He pulls back slightly to look you in the eye. You can sense the flicker of nervousness underneath. “I’m not gonna last very long. Probably. ’S that okay?”
“That’s fine,” you breathe. “I don’t care. Just… I just want you inside of me.”
“I can do that,” Kai chokes, and you laugh. “Could I– could I fuck you like this?”
“Like what?”
Kai pokes your waist. “Missionary?” he says like it’s an offer, the corners of his lips rising when you squirm. “I want to see your face while I fuck you. You always look so pretty like that.”
Your cheeks heat and you look away. “You’re a perv. But okay, sure.”
“You’re the perv. Got all horny when we we’re just making out.” He presses a wet kiss to your cheek. “What if I had just wanted to kiss you, huh? Just some pure, innocent making out.”
“Sorry. You get me all worked up.”
Kai giggles. “I know. Love hearing you say it.” He hums while he takes off his sweatpants, and you do the same—you’re still tugging off your shirt when you feel his fingers brush against the clasp of your bra.
“You desperate?” you tease, letting him take it off for you.
Kai nods solemnly, moving down so his bare hips are parallel to yours. “Hell yeah,” he says, but you’re looking so intently at his cock that you forget to laugh. “Quit staring, perv.”
“You’re so annoying,” you shoot back, but there’s no bite, and he only smiles, taking the base of his cock to align himself with you. There’s a bare second of quiet, where you can hear both of your breaths, bated and waiting, and you can see the desperation—the hunger—in Kai’s face.
“Can I put it in now, baby?” he breathes. “Please? F-fuck, please?”
Shit. You might go insane if he keeps this up, begging prettily for you before he even gets his cock inside. You whine and nod, breath hitching when his fingers graze your tits. “Please, Kai,” you whimper. “Please, yes, please.”
Kai grabs the base of his cock again and eases the tip past your folds, his heart beating wildly. He breathes heavily, his other hand steady on your hip, so large compared to your smaller frame. “Jesus fucking Christ. You feel so good,” he says, trying not to sound too whiny when he barely put it in, but you don’t even notice, trembling beneath him. His brows furrow, lost in your warmth, but he manages to muster a smile. “You okay, angel?”
“Yeah.” Your voice is high and reedy. Your hands bunch up in the sheets. “Put—more, more, please.”
“Sure, sweetheart,” he responds, sounding on the verge of tears, because he quite honestly is about to cry with how tight you feel already. He eases more in, slowly, letting you take it in inch by inch, relishing in the feeling. A few moments pass and your hips finally meet; you let out twin sighs of relief. Kai leans over to mouth at your shoulder, his voice dropping to a whisper. “Shiiit, baby, you feel fucking good.”
You only moan in response, almost drooling onto the sheets. Kai stays still for a while, letting you get used to it, marvelling at how wet you are.
“Shit, I could be inside you forever. Oh, fuck. W-would you let me? Hm? Ah, would you let me—shit—fuck this t-tight cunt everyday? Want me to be inside you all the time, right? Isn’t that right, baby?” Kai taps your cheek and you just sob, backing your hips against his desperately. Kai lets out a giggle, and it’s so high-pitched and out of place you would probably scold him if you were in any other state of mind.
Alas, instead you’re trembling beneath him as he pounds you, whining and drooling on the sheets because his cock feels so good. It should be embarrassing. It definitely is. But you can’t find it in yourself to care.
“You’re a f-fucking pervert,” you whine.
Kai breaks into a smile, so wide and so fucking proud of himself. You can tell, even through your hazy mind, and it makes your heart swell. “Shit, I must have a good fuckin’ cock if I got you all f-fucked up like this,” he murmurs, using his free hand to play with your nipples. “I love you so much, angel. Love making you feel good.” The filth falls so easily from his mouth that it’s hard for you to believe that not one hour ago Kai was struggling to even call you a good girl.
“Luh—fuck, love you too, Kai,” you wail, bringing your hands up to splay across your face. “Please, please keep going, f-feels so good—”
“You’re so shy,” Kai whispers, his expression melting into a grin. He reaches up, pinches your cheeks. “How are you still so shy, hm? Your pussy is weeping onto my cock and you’re acting like this? So cute. Wanna fuck you so hard.”
“You already are,” you whine, reaching up to slap weakly at his chest. “Fuck, why are you t-talking so much?”
Kai giggles again. “Feels so good, that’s why. Your pussy’s making my brain melt. Fuck.” He gives a particularly hard thrust here, then moves his hand to rub over your tummy. “’M gonna come soon. Love you—I love you so much. Where do you want it, angel? Inside?”
“Mmm—yeah, fuck, please.”
“Gonna fuck you til your pussy’s all white and mine, alright? Fuck it back into you so it stays there, ffff-fuck, baby, I love you, thank you, I love you so mu— fuck—”
Wet heat inside you and a soft breath against the side of your neck—you feel his head drop onto your shoulder before his hand reaches over to your clit. His hips shift and he pulls out, only to move down between your legs and give your pussy a soft, almost kittenish lick. “G’na come f’me, too, angel,” he murmurs around your pussy, and you can see the hints of a smile gracing his face when your legs close around his head and muss up his hair. “Come on, please, please, want you to come—”
He lolls out his tongue and buries his face deeper in between your thighs, and it only takes a few mor licks, sucks, and the steady pump of his fingers before you’re coming, legs trembling around his ears and hands tangled in his messy hair. Your hips buck up into the air but his lips still follow, chasing the taste, and you whine from the overstimulation.
When he pulls away, a string of spit follows. He can’t move far before you’re grabbing him and pulling him into a kiss, smiling against his teeth when he lets out a small oof. He’s on top of you now, hand cupping your cheek. 
“Love you,” Kai murmurs, kissing your forehead. “Love you so much. You okay? You’re making a face.”
You are. “Sorry—one of your plushies—Molang, I’m like, sitting on it—”
“Oh!” You lift your hips and Kai reaches underneath your torso to retrieve his blue penguin Molang pushie. He smiles down at you. “Were you on it the entire time?”
“No, I think it fell while you were eating me out and somehow ended up underneath me.”
Kai grins and nuzzles his face into your neck. “You were arching your back that much? Did it feel that good?”
“I think this concerns the amount of plushies you have, not your stroke game—”
“My pussy eating game, actually.”
You throw another Molang plushie at his face. It’s soft, just like his cheeks when he smiles at you and they get all squishy, just like his lips when you tug him down for another kiss.
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sillysowa · 1 year
Note
Ok I have a request :) could maybe guess who this is but AHDBSH
The fem reader is a villain while Hobie is the “hero”(not rlly but I forgot what it’s called) that’s been tracking down the reader. But, during the day the both live their normal lives, the readers day job being a barista at the local Cafe. Of course during the night her identity is hidden so she isn’t recognized during the day, which leads to the one morning when Hobie goes to the local coffee shop to order a drink and unknowingly ordering it from his masked nemesis.
What’d ya think? <3
I LOVE your brain anon! Sorry for the wait and if it seems rushed!
BEHIND THE MASK
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pairing : hobie brown x fem!prowler!reader
genre : fluff, slightly suggestive
word count : 3k
warnings : violence
authors note : reader is the prowler but i have incredibly minimal knowledge on the prowler lol
synopsis : hobie has a date with a cute barista who just so happens to be the prowler
“And what exactly do you think you’re doin?”
Spiderpunk’s agonizing voice cuts through the silence of the night and you freeze in your tracks. You knew he’d find you tonight—always chasing after you like a moth to a flame, or a fly to a spiders web.
He drops down from the wall, thrusting his hands into his pockets and clicking his tongue, his loud boots slapping against the ground behind you,
“What’ya got in that bag of yours? Up to something you shouldn’t be?” He questions, coming right up behind you and whispering next to your ear. You turn around, your hands up as you look at him through your mask,
“Bold of you to assume i’ve done anything, I could just be out for a midnight stroll.” You shrug slyly, toying with him. You know just as well as he does that he could have tried to take you down by now, he’s clearly just wanted a little foreplay as usual.
“Oh, is it now? You’ve got this guilty air about you.” He asks, completely prepared for any attack that you might have up your sleeve, “You really want me to believe a dirty little liar like you, hm?” As he provokes you, his gloved hands reach up to your face only to get smacked away, but he only smiles harder—he expected it. A scoff can be heard from under your mask,
“Miss me, Spiderpunk? You seem awfully excited.” You sneer, voice muffled a deeper more menacing tone. His animated mask portrays his every expression, a squinty smirk plastered on his face,
“How’d you know?” He smirks, coming closer. You flex your fingers, claws baring menacingly before you rip a smoke bomb off your belt and slam it down, making Spiderpunk stumble back before you lunge at him through the cloud. His senses go wild, and he web shoots to the wall, swinging around and pulling his guitar out while you’re down. Your momentum landing you on your knees after he dodged, and you can’t react fast enough for his attack. He’s got his guitar above his head before he slams it down on your back,
“Ah!—Fuck me!” You grumble, rolling over and jumping up, shaking your head with your hands in front of you defensively.
“Only if you ask nicely, gorgeous,” He’s got his guitar out on display as if it’s a sword, making you scoff,
“In your dreams.” Your crack your neck and lunge at him, grunting and swinging wherever you can reach from your stance. You’d never admit it, but his height creeped you out and excited you all at once. Never in a million years would you get with a person like Spiderpunk—a loud, obnoxious, wannabe ‘hero’—but the fact that he towered over you like he did made you nervous in the best way possible. You tried to ignore the feelings deep in your stomach and focus on the way that made you feel about your fighting, afraid that he could overpower you if you let your guard down even slightly—which you did. He had used his fucking guitar pick—the small object somehow slicing your arm. You gasped and he hurriedly backed up, nearly tripping over his feet. At first he was dodging your punches well until you threw a right hook in, your knuckles meeting his jaw with as much force as you could muster,
He had no time to react as he stumbled down. You kicked him across the face and pinned his hands down under your shoes. You knew you had to act fast and get the hell away from him,
“Couldn’t have wined and dined me first?” He quips, his wrists pinned beside his head and his legs spread under you. It’s quite a sight—the city’s hero sprawled out under you like this at your mercy. You shake the thoughts out of your head,
“Catch you later, Spiderpunk.” You rasp, reaching to your belt and popping the cap off a homemade bomb. His eyes triple in size as you throw it, your boot shoving his face down before you flee. He scrambles and slings away before the bomb explodes and the walls surrounding it crumble.
He watches from across the street as the damage ensues, cursing to himself when sees the faint glow of your suit as you disappear into the night. You were such a pain in his ass—but couldn’t keep away.
—?” You yell out the name of an order, setting a drink and pastry down. You smile at the customer who walks up and thanks you, giving them a quick smile before returning to the register, swapping out with your coworker,
“Thanks again, Y/N.” They sigh. This isn’t typical behavior from your coworker, they’re typically very hard working but they told you a chunk of their apartment complex was blown up last night. Of course, you had to sympathize with them and help make their shift a little easier—it’s the least you could do after being the unknown cause of their distress.
“Yeah don’t worry about it.” You wipe off your uniform and put on a smile for the customers of the small café you work at. It had been an exhausting shift—only 30 minutes in and it already felt like hell. You looked up ready to give your best customer service voice when your words caught in your throat…
The man in front of you was absolutely breath taking. He had these high cheekbones and pretty eyes, full lips with a ring to compliment them, perfectly styled hair and jewelry all over—god his fashion too. He had this punk rock thing going on, and he was absolutely killing it. Even his body language was attractive, the way his hands were on either side of the table, leaning over slightly to reach your level,
“Mornin’.” He starts, his deep voice only spurring on your attraction towards him, “Could I just get a…” He looks up, biting the inside of his cheek before sighing, “Having a hard time making a choice—wide selection you’ve got. What do you recommend?” He asks with a curious expression, bending down close to hear you over the machinery, clanging dishes, and customer chatter.
You’re stunned, not expecting you’d have to think. After a little stuttering, you can finally think,
“W-Well we have this Persian tea. It’s a black tea base with cardamom and rose petals?” You suggest, your face heating up when he smiles because of course he has the lost beautiful smile you’ve ever seen, “It’s my favorite.” You add, voice coming out oddly quiet and now you’re incredibly embarrassed for reasons you can’t name,
“Sounds perfect, gorgeous.” He eccentrically squints his eyes and shakes his head as he speaks, half lidded eyes locking with yours again.
“And the name for your order?” You ask, tapping in the details on the screen before making eye contact with him,
“Hobie.” And of course, there’s something about the way he says his name that has you melting, but you desperately try to ignore it and pull yourself together. He whips out his wallet and hands you a large bill, your fingers slipping against his as you take it into your hand. You ring him up and gather his change, which he adamantly refuses to take,
“Keep it.” The stunning man winks, walking away and waiting in the line of others who have ordered. For a moment, you stand there completely appalled. When you turn to look at your coworker she’s already staring at you,
“…Oh my god?” She mouths, her hand over her mouth, “You better go make his drink and write your number on his cup, girl—move over i’ve got the register.” She laughs in disbelief, just as flustered as you,
“Thank you, thank you.” You hurriedly giggle, feeling guilty almost at her eagerness before moving out of her way and fumbling around, steeping his tea immediately. You were extra meticulous when crafting his order, wanting it to be just perfect. You caught glimpses of the rockstar-like man over the counter a few times, and almost every time he was already looking at you. You had to bite your lip to fight back the smile that tugged at your lips. When you poured his tea in a cup and clicked the cap on, you pulled out your sharpie and wrote his name messily, scribbling your number under it. With a cheeky smile you set the cup down,
“Hobie?” You call out like you have no idea who he is despite holding eye contact with him. He walks over, pulling a hand out of his pockets and wrapping his long fingers around the cup,
“Thank you, doll.” He rasped, scanning you over one last time when suddenly he squints,
“Y’alright? Doesn’t look like just a little scratch.” He asks you with his eyebrows furrowed, pointing low and squinting in concern. You’re just as confused as he is for a moment, looking down with your heart stopping as you realize it’s the cut from when Spiderpunk sliced you with his guitar pick, the memories of last night flooding into your brain and causing a panic in your nerves, your adrenaline pumping in a flash,
“Oh this? I got this from a clumsy accident the other day, it’s really no biggie.” You brush it off, covering the cut with your hand and cursing internally. You want to hide and never show your face again, the worst possible outcomes clouding your thoughts. He doesn’t seem concerned about your response, taking it for the truth,
“You better be more careful then, yeah?” He playfully chastises, turning to leave, “See y’round, pretty.” And with that, he walks out of the café, humming in delight at the flavors in your favorite drink. He’s almost done with his drink when he finally notices your number on the cup, laughing to himself and freezing in his tracks.
You got a call that night after your shift—you knew you would. When you picked up the phone and his deep voice was on the other end you just about melted into your bed.
“Hey, Hobie.”
“Hello, lovely—never got your name.” He mutters on the other end, background shuffling and movements loud enough to reach your ears. He sounds like he’s flipping switches and plugging stuff in,
“It’s, Y/N.” You chirp. Hobie feels a smile take over his face as he learns your name, repeating it a couple times,
“Such a pretty name you’ve got.” He coo’s his voice low and sultry. You smile widely, stupidly giddy over this
stranger,
“Thank you.”
“Don’t mention it.” He says smugly. On the other side of the phone you can faintly hear what sounds like a guitar, an electric guitar, “How about we go out sometime, yeah? When can I see you?” He asks, his voice charismatic.
You think, caught between wanting to see him tomorrow and wanting to be careful about who sees you that day. Tomorrow you had shady plans, and you didn’t want to get him roped into it, “Hm…it sounds weird but can I see you at nine?” You ask with a questioning tilt in your voice, “I understand it’s late but—“
“No worries, hun, works f’me.” He insists, causing you to sigh in relief.
“Okay great! thank you, Hobie.” You smile, fidgeting with your clothes anxiously. He hums and you feel your heart race,
“See you then, Y/N.”
Tonight would be the craziest heist of your life if you could pull it off. Keyword, if.
You didn’t know, but Spiderpunk had been following you the entire night. He had to keep a close watch on you after that stunt you pulled last time. You had somehow managed to outsmart him and he couldn’t let it happen again. You were currently in an alleyway, your pace fast and your head down—you honestly couldn’t look more suspicious as you walked towards the bank.
“Don’t think so.” He mutters to himself, slinging down and following you stealthily. He crept along the walls, keeping a watchful eye on you as you literally sawed open the wall, following close behind.
You on the other hand had a lot of tasks you were juggling all at once—you were texting Hobie telling him you’d see him in 15 minutes, sawing the building open, and watching your back simultaneously.
Spiderpunk, who couldn’t yet see you well enough to notice you were texting with your other hand, jumped when his phone vibrated with a notification. He pulled it out and quickly checked it, his heart racing at your name lighting up his screen. He just had to take you down to make it to the date on time—easy peasy.
He crept into the bank, catching a glimpse of you breaking into all their stashes and safes, literally stuffing cash into your bag. You look rushed and panicked, not as tactful as your usual self. He find it entertaining and comical decided to mess with you a little,
“In a hurry?” That low and taunting voice makes your skin crawl, whipping your head around, fingering tightening on your bag. Of course he was here, how could you have missed him? Or more importantly, how could he have not missed you? You knew it was a shot in the dark to just assume he wouldn’t find you this night as he always does—you bet he has some kind of affinity for you. A gravely sigh tumbles from your lips, shaking your head and slinging your bag over your shoulder,
“Look—I can’t fool around with you tonight, let’s skip the small talk.” You grunt, clicking your claws into readied fists, staring him down with precision. Spiderpunk liked fighting you when you were playful, but there was something about fighting you when you were annoyed that really excited him,
“What’s got your panties in a twist?” He teases with a low whistle, webbing towards you feet first. You dodge, grunting and lunging at him, both of you rolling until he’s got you under him, attempting to restrain you. You bring your knees up and kick him off of you, jumping up and circling him. He stares you down for a while, that messy painted mask squinty-eyed,
“Come on.” He sneers, beckoning you with his two, very long, middle fingers suggestively. You laugh at this, lunging at him in a series of calculated movements. He fights you off, throwing out quips and sly remarks to fire you up. You swing at him, your claws out, and he struggles against you when you attempt to stab him with them, pushing your wrists against the wall and grunting through the struggle. You’re shaking under him, hissing and squirming in an attempt to free yourself when he webs you to the wall.
“Fuck! God—“ You groan, frustrated and beyond pissed at what this means for you. Hobie’s face flashes in your brain and you cringe at the idea of standing him up like this,
“Please! Please just let me go this time…” You grunt, the webs holding you down like a barricade as he pulls your bag off you, spilling the contents out onto the floor—your phone, your outfit for the date, and all the money scattered across the cool tile,
“What’s with the dress? Got a date tonight?” He hums, picking up the fancy garment before dropping it back in place when you just scoff. Hobie reaches down to gather up the money when he notices the time on your phone, straightening up and pulling his own phone out,
“Shit—it’s that time already?” You watch as he hurriedly texts someone, his thumbs dancing across the screen. You slump against the wall as much as you can being restrained, sighing in pure frustration when your phone buzzes.
You both freeze—you because you’re deathly embarrassed and Hobie because his heart drops into his stomach. Directly after he sent a text to Y/N, your phone lit up. He looks at you, trying to decode your body language as he bends down and picks up your phone, confirming his suspicions.
Sure enough, there’s a text from him, or ‘Hobie,’ right in the middle of your lock screen. He sighs and pinches the bridge of his nose between his thumb and index finger, laughing to himself with his shoulders shaking in tandem.
You on the other hand are completely and utterly unaware of what just happened, still stuck to the wall and helplessly watching the scene in front of you. He stuff his and your phone into his pocket, muttering something to himself that you can’t quite make out before he walks towards you, the soles of his boots echoing in the dark empty bank,
“What the—why did you take my phone? What are you-“ Your rambles are cut short as his gloved hands come up to your mask, removing it despite your protests. After tossing it to the ground, he simply takes it all in. It’s you, his date—the prowler. You’re obviously still completely oblivious to what’s transpired and therefore furious,
“Answer me asshole! What good is seeing my face gonna do for you?“ And now, it’s your turn to be completely speechless as Spiderpunk pulls his mask off. Hobie’s dark hair springs out, his pretty face glowing in the low light and a smirk tugging at the corners of his lips as he watches you swallow the same truth as he did,
“Cant say I was expecting this.” He whispers coyly, eating up the way you instantly grow quiet and flustered, this extra layer added onto your relationship clearly only exciting you more. You gulp nervously, your heart racing at this sudden turn of events,
“Me neither…” You whisper, simply unable to be mad or upset when now you’ve got your cake and you’re about to eat it too.
Hobie doesn’t do much thinking when he unties you and kicks the money aside, or when he tells you to put on that pretty dress and let him take you out properly. You’re completely stunned, staring down at your prowler claws before stuffing them in your bag and walking out the hole you cut into the bank, Hobie waiting against the wall for you,
“So…about all of this?” You awkwardly chuckle, motioning to the bank, the money, and the mess. Hobie being the anarchist he is simply shrugs, extending his palm for yours and clasping it when you place it against his, slinging away into the night to finally go on that date,
“Not my problem.”
@ohxx @luxxtuxx @fatenpara @hobesbf @defnot-bri
558 notes · View notes
strzlun · 1 year
Text
PARADISE
// lee heeseung //
pairing: best friend!heeseung x femreader
word count- 5.1k
genre/cw- fluff, angst, profanity (one time), unrequited feelings, fake dating, jealousy, confessions, kissing, heeseung falls in love harder each second, realization, heeseung helps reader, heated arguments, slight violence (heeseung punches someone)
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summary- Heeseung wants to dive into the paradise of his best friend
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Heeseung was simple person, he loved his family, he loved his friends, he loved playing basketball, he loved singing. And he also loved you, his best friend.
Now, Heeseung doesn’t know when he fell for you, but it didn’t even matter. When he realized, he knew it was too late for him, he was in your world and he was more than grateful enough to live in it.
But there was a downfall for his love for you. You didn’t feel the same way towards him, instead you liked one of his close friend.
You tried endlessly to get to know his friend and possibly have a relationship with him, but he was someone who simply didn’t like commitment. And his friend wasn’t going to change that for you even if he was interested in you.
Heeseung on the other hand wanted to curse his friend out, how could he not fall madly in love with you? He called his friend stupid endless of times for not taking your chances in trying to get to know him.
His friend didn’t realize how much Heeseung would kill to be in his position. To have you portray for your feelings for him, it sounded nothing but a paradise to him.
Heeseung wouldn’t hesitate to give you the world if you asked for it, that’s just how much he loved you. But he was forced to heard your rambles on how you talked to his friend today, trying to get to know him more.
Every time you talked to Heeseung about his friend, he swore he felt a piece of him vanish into the universe. Oh how much he would love to be the one you had feelings for instead.
“Heeseung, what do you think I should do?” You asked your best friend as you laid on his couch face down
You had just talked to his friend and he said he would give you a chance but he needed a little more of a push to pursue you. He didn’t know how much it struck your heart with pain as you heard his words, but you only smiled and nodded your head.
You don’t know why you put yourself through this path and pain but you just liked Heeseung’s friend so much that you couldn’t just simply let go of him.
Heeseung wanted to tell you to drop his friend and go to him, that he would treat you better, he would give you endless love. Instead, Heeseung only patted your back that faced him in comfort.
He didn’t know what he could do that could help you realize that his friend is the most stupidest person out there for not realizing you’re everything his friend could ever want.
He could hear your groan against his couch as he sat next to you. He tried to hold in his laughter, he knew this wasn’t the time but he couldn’t help but admire you. When you had your mind set on something, it wasn’t easy for you to let go of it.
There was a comfortable silence that casted over the two of you. You and Heeseung had been best friend for years, you remember when you first met him, you swore he was the perfect boy next door. It was bound that the two of you would be closer as the years pasted by, and you were glad you had him as your best friend.
You didn’t like Heeseung having to see you like this but you wouldn’t anyone else to see how you were truly feeling if it wasn’t him, you best friend.
He hated always having to be the one comforting you after you had a conversation with his best friend. It wasn’t because he actually despised helping you, but rather he hated it because you shouldn’t be feeling that in the first place.
You deserved to be treated with such love, to never have any doubts in your mind and live happily ever after with someone who loves you dearly, like him.
That was when an idea came to his mind, was it the best idea? Definitely not, but it was an idea that could help him dip his existence into a paradise with you if you allowed it.
“Let’s date” You lifted your head to face him wondering if you had heard him right, when you weren’t saying anything, he realized he may have been too straight forward
“I mean let’s fake date, maybe seeing you lose interest in him will cause him to finally chase after you” When Heeseung explained, you were quick to sit upright and look at him with a sparkle in your eyes, oh how he adored seeing your eyes sparkle
In your mind, his idea was the best idea you’ve ever heard of. You thought his reasoning was perfect too, if his friend realized you were losing interested that would be the perfect push he needed to pursue you. Yet, when it finally registered in your mind that Heeseung would be the one you would have to fake date.
“But are you okay with helping me? I don’t want it to seem like I’m just using you. You know what no, we aren’t doing it. I’m not using you like that Heeseung” Your soon agreement switched to a disagreement when you realized you would have to use Heeseung in order to do this
He was your best friend, he wasn’t someone that you would just use to help you with your desires. You would figure out another way to have Heeseung’s close friend look your way.
Heeseung on the hand wanted you to use him for this, he was allowing you to use how ever much you wanted. He wanted you to know that he was all yours for you use.
“Listen it’s okay, you’re my best friend. I’ll be more than happy to help you” Physical touch was normal between the two of you so he grabbed your hands into his as he gave the smile you found comfort in
You found yourself smiling at him and you felt your heart swoon. You just assumed that it must have been because you were just so thankful he was willing enough to help you.
“Are you sure? I don’t want you to feel obligated, like you have to help me just because I’m your best friend”
“Just let me help you and in no time, you’ll be in a loving, happy relationship” The way your smile plastered onto your face sent him to the moon and back, he gave you a bright smile
Suddenly, you tackled him onto the couch for a hug and he wasn’t expect it, you laughed once you realized this and got off of him, reaching your hand out to help him sit up again.
There was glint in Heeseung’s eyes that you didn’t know what it meant but he only smiled and reached for your hand. Once your hand held onto each other, he was quick to pull you back down, you squealed as he gave a hug.
Out of context, the situation may have seen romantic but to you, it was simply two best friends being appreciative of each other. Heeseung on the other hand felt like his heart was about to pound of his chest with how fast it was beating.
Heeseung knew this risky for him, he doesn’t think it’d be possible to fall more in love with you. But somehow you always showed him the impossible, so it wasn’t ruled out that he’d love you even more than he does now.
Oh what has Heeseung set himself up for?
Now you and Heeseung set up rules for this fake relationship. One, which was self explanatory, you two obviously have to keep that this was a fake relationship a secret. Two, whenever Heeseung’s friend is around, the two of you have to act like you’re madly in love with each other. Three which was the last rule, respect the boundaries of the other.
You trusted Heeseung and Heeseung trusted you, the two of you knew each other more than you knew yourselves. That was a pro about having a fake relationship with your best friend, he already knew everything about you.
It’s been a month since you and Heeseung started your fake relationship. You slowly distant yourself from his friend little by little, as you realized you have to make it believable that you were losing interest in him and giving up on him.
His friend took a notice to your sudden distance but didn’t dwell on it that much. He just assumed you’d come back.
You tried to make it known not only to his friend but everyone else that you were spending time with Heeseung over the past month. You wanted to make the impossible of being together twenty four seven every single day seem possible between the two of you.
Today was no different, you were over at his house but excused yourself because you were getting a call, leaving Heeseung in the living room to wait for your return. Now if he was asked how he was feeling the past month, he would tell you that he felt the luckiest person ever.
Even though the two of acted the same way you always acted, you could notice the small changes with the agreement of the fake relationship. Heeseung was much gentle with you, he was always by your side no matter what whether you needed him or not. Heeseung would hold your hands when you complained about having cold hands. You were grateful for him both as a best friend and as your fake boyfriend.
Heeseung knew he changed how he acted towards you, he hated how the lines were blurring between reality and the fake relationship. He always allowed you to win games so that you could cheer in celebration at winning against him. He loved the way you would admire him whenever brought you when he played basketball or whenever you heard him singing.
Heeseung was more than pleased to be able to experience the side of your world he never got to see, he was able to get a snippet of the paradise of you. With that snippet, he couldn’t get enough of it.
With him knowing that he was yours even if it was fake was able to make his heart swell with happiness. The little things were able to make him fall even more in love with you.
As he was zoning out with a happy smile on his face at the mere thought of you, he didn’t realize his friend, your crush walking into his place confused to notice the front door was unlocked. Heeseung leaves his front door unlocked, when he knows you’re coming over.
He thought it was best that you were able to walk into his place like you owned it, which in his heart you did just like everything else that was associated with him.
Heeseung was brought back when he felt a shake at his shoulder, he worriedly looked thinking it was you and when he was greeted with his friend he was even more shocked.
“You alright Heeseung? Why was your front door unlocked?” He wasn’t able to respond to his friend because you soon walked into the living room where the two were at
“You won’t believe what that call was about-“ You giggled but stopped in your tracks when you saw Heeseung and his friend in the living room
His friend looked back and forth between the two of you, surprised. You hadn’t responded to his message since three days ago and here you were hanging out in Heeseung’s place. His friend knew you and Heeseung have been best friends ever since you two were children but he thought that there would be a barrier as you two grew older.
“Oh hey” You nervously muttered, you still felt the butterflies in your stomach when you saw him and you cursed at yourself for still being nervous
“Hi? What are you doing here?” Before you could even respond, Heeseung was quick to stand up and walk over to you, after all this was the reason the fake relationship was establish in the first place
“She can’t spend time with me?” Heeseung raised an eyebrow, he liked instigating especially when it came to his friend, he knew how his friend was feeling seeing you at his place
“I’m not saying she can’t, but I’m just wondering” His friend’s tone was cold and you swore you could feel it in your bones
“Well I am currently in the process of becoming her boyfriend so I think it’s normal that she hangs out with me” He could feel your gaze whip over to him at his words but he only smirked when he saw his friend step back in shock
“Can I talk to you for a minute?” His friend looked at you and you nervously gulped, you could hear the tension building between the two of you
“Whatever you say to her, you can say to me” Heeseung shrugged his shoulders, he knew his words were adding fuel to the fire
“No it’s fine, we can talk” You stepped in, throwing a glare at Heeseung before walking outside
Heeseung’s friend had an emotion in his eyes as he looked at Heeseung before following you outside, closing the door behind him.
Heeseung knew his friend was beyond jealous and mad, and he felt satisfied that he was able to get that reaction out of him. He knew his friend wasn’t liking the fact that you were with Heeseung instead of him. Heeseung plopped himself back onto his couch waiting for you to come back.
After what felt like hours, his front door opened and walked in you. Heeseung turned his head toward you and immediately tripped over himself getting off the couch as he rushed over to you.
You were crying, your eyes were bloodshot red as tears stained your face. Heeseung cupped you face into his hands and worriedly looked at you, you were trying to put on a smile for him but it shivered every time your lips dared to go upwards.
“What did he do?” Heeseung’s voice was soft with you but there was a hint of anger in it, you shook your head and wiped your eyes
“It’s fine, I’m fine” Your voice was hoarse and soft, in all his time that he’s known you, never have you sounded like this Heeseung could feel anger rise in him every second he sees the tears brimming in your eyes again
“I think I should go home” You softly brushed Heeseung’s hands off your face, as you walked pasted him sniffling to collect your belongings
He stared at you as you have your back towards him. He had to restrain every inch of his body from walking out that door and punching his friend for making you cry.
When you walked past Heeseung to go out his front door, he softly caught your wrist with his hand. You didn’t even dare to look at him, you were on the brink of sobbing and you wanted to get home as quickly as you can to cry your eyes out.
“Stay the night” His voice was much softer, he never would show his anger in front of you, all he wanted to do was comfort you
“I don’t think it’s the best idea”
“I’m asking as your best friend, not as your fake boyfriend” The reminder that Heeseung was only your fake boyfriend wanted to make you cry even more and you didn’t know why
“You know I would never judge you for anything”
“So please stay the night” After a moment of contemplating you sighed, you gave into his words, you dropped your belongings onto the floor as the wave of emotions finally got you
You crouched and cried into your hands, you tried to muffle your sobs but Heeseung could still hear them as clear as day. He crouched down with you and brought you into his arms, you didn’t bear to wrap your arms around him as you cried into him.
As he softly rubbed your back, he whispered sweet nothing into your ears, wanting to calm you down.
You were embarrassed crying in front of Heeseung like this especially because of his friend, but he didn’t care. He promised to always be there for you and that’s what he was going to do, doesn’t matter time or place or who it was because of.
You sat up against Heeseung’s bed headboard as Heeseung sat in the far corner of his bed, you both stayed in silence. That’s how it’s been like ever since you stopped crying, you felt bad pouring your heart out to Heeseung but he told you that it more than okay.
“You feeling better?” You nodded your head, the silence once again filled the room
“You should head to bed, I can imagine you’re exhausted” You smiled warmly at his concerned words, you were getting off his bed when he stopped you
“Where are you going?”
“To sleep on the couch?” Heeseung looked at you as if you were crazy for even thinking about sleeping on the couch
“No, I’m taking the couch, you’re sleeping on the bed” You stared at Heeseung before scoffing, you both were stubborn so neither of you were going down without a fight
“No, Heeseung you’re taking the bed and I’m taking the couch” You continued to get off his bed but you gasped when you were pulled back and suddenly pinned down onto his bed
Heeseung hovered above you as you two were effortlessly close to each other, you could feel your heart start to pound against your chest almost hearing it in ear by how loud it was.
Heeseung stared into eyes and there something in his eyes that you couldn’t recognized. You both stayed there for what felt like decades until he moved away from you, without saying a word and walked out his room. You were stunned at what happened between the two of you, but soon regained your composure and went out his room to get him back.
When you went to his living room, you already saw all the lights out as he laid on the couch, his back facing you. He didn’t have any pillow or blanket so he uncomfortably shuffle around trying to find warmth and comfortability.
You were upset that he wouldn’t allow you to the take the couch but you softly walked away and back into his room to grab a blanket and a pillow for him.
You could hear his at ease breathing and realized he had fallen asleep already. You giggled softly, he must have been the exhausted one. You gently raised his head to slip the pillow underneath him as you draped the blanket over him to make sure he was warm.
You always wanted to take care of Heeseung, the same way he always takes care of you. He held such a special place in your heart that no one could ever replace, that’s just how much he meant to you.
When you woke up, your eyes were certainly sore from all the crying. You tried to adjust your eyes to the sunlight shinning on your face through Heeseung’s curtains. You went to grab your phone to check the time and you gasped seeing it.
It was already 3 pm, you rushed out of Heeseung’s room and you expected to see him on the couch or at least somewhere around but there was no sign of him. When you went to the kitchen that was when you saw a note left by him.
It said that he would be stepping out and that he didn’t want to wake you up, seeming that you were too exhausted and you needed all the sleep you could get. You called his phone but it was sent to voicemail after multiple rings, you sighed wondering where he could’ve gone.
Now Heeseung wasn’t going to get involve but he couldn’t sleep last night. When you came to put a pillow under his head and drape the blanket over him, he knew that he couldn’t let his friend get away for making you crying so much.
So now here he was banging on his friend’s door, anticipating for him to open it. When his friend grumbled while opening the door, he stopped when he saw Heeseung. He expected Heeseung to come but didn’t think he would come just the day after.
Before his friend could even greet him, Heeseung was quick to grab his collar and push him inside the house before closing the door with his foot.
“What the fuck did you say to her yesterday?” The pent up anger Heeseung had yesterday was finally be able to be released to the person that caused it
His friend shoved Heeseung’s hand from his collar, he wasn’t liking the fact Heeseung was getting angry at him on you behalf.
“I didn’t say anything wrong to her” His friend straighten out his wrinkled shirt but Heeseung was quick to connect his first on his collar again
“You got some nerve you know that?”
“Just why are you so pissed and involved with what happened between us?”
“Because she’s my best friend” His friend scoffed, tilting his head to the side hearing Heeseung’s words
“Thought she was your girlfriend” Heeseung shoved his friend away from him
“She’s my best friend first”
“Aw Heeseung getting all sentimental for her? Think about it, we shouldn’t let her get in between us and ruin our friendship” Heeseung was seething with anger, it should be the other way around, his friend shouldn’t be the one getting between you and Heeseung
“You’re the one who shouldn’t get in between us. You really think I was going to side with you after you made her cry for hours on end? You must not know me well enough then because I would choose her over you any day” His friend was angry to hear this and shoved Heeseung
“You’re really going to her ruin what we have?”
“If it means getting rid of you from mine and her’s life, I’ll be more than happy to do so” His friend scoffed loudly and poked his cheek with his tongue
“Why do you even care so much about her? You obviously don’t care for her like a best friend, you act like you care for her like a boyfriend instead”
“Tell me Heeseung, are you perhaps in love with her?” The sudden question was enough for Heeseung to freeze, he didn’t expect from his friend to ask the question about whether he loves you or not
He knows he does, he drowns himself of your world, but he never openly expressed his love for you other than to himself.
“It doesn’t matter about me, what matters is what the hell you said to her yesterday to make her cry” Before argument could even escalate any higher, Heeseung’s phone started to ring and he knew exactly who it was, he had a special ringtone for whenever you were contacting him
Heeseung angrily sighed before letting go of his friend’s collar. His ringtone for you in his ear was more than enough to snap out of his anger, you must’ve been wondering where he was.
His friend watched as Heeseung was making his way out the door, leaving the argument like that.
“Guess she’s calling for her knight in shinning armor” That was the last thing his friend was able to say before Heeseung threw a hard punch to his face
His friend stumbled back at the impact and cupped his face with his hand.
“What the hell?” His friend groaned and Heeseung only smugly smiled
“That’s for making her cry, don’t make me punch you on my behalf” And without Heeseung left his friend’s place to go back to you, who must be waiting for him to come back
Now when Heeseung arrived back, he didn’t genuinely expect you to waiting for him. When you heard the front door open, you were quick to stand in front of Heeseung. He gave you a smile but it soon fell when he saw your expression.
“You punched him?” Was the first word that left your mouth and Heeseung grimaced hearing the tone you used, it was disappointing
But he couldn’t form any sentence to defend himself, he wasn’t going to lie to you. You waited for an answer to confirm the message you received from him friend. He texted you saying how Heeseung was over and had just punched him.
“He deserved it” You scoffed and shook your head at his word
“I know he does but doesn’t mean you can go and punch him without knowing what can happened next” You weren’t mad at Heeseung for punching him, rather you were grateful for that he did what you want to do, but you were mad that he could’ve gotten hurt in the process
“You should’ve heard the nonsense he was spewing, he had it coming for him” Heeseung’s voice was getting louder, it was something he never did but he was growing frustrated with the whole situation
After everything his friend did to you, you were still defending him.
“No but that doesn’t mean you have to punch him” You matched the loudness of voice, you could already predict the inevitable argument rising
“Why are you protecting him after everything?” He wanted to heard your reasoning, he wanted to know why your reaction was like this
You groaned loudly, Heeseung didn’t realize the real reasoning behind this.
“I’m not protecting him, I’m protecting you. What if you got hurt instead? How do you think I would’ve felt knowing you got hurt by him?”
“I would’ve punched him himself for hurting you” You didn’t realizing what your words were leading up to, they were leading to an unexpected confession of your new found feelings for your best friend
Heesueng remained frozen at your words, he didn’t know whether to interpret them the way he wanted to or the way he thought you meant it as.
“And that’s what I did for you. I punched him for hurting you”
“But what if you got hurt Heeseung because of me? I can’t let that happen, I care too much about you to see you get hurt” You weren’t realizing the words that were leaving your mouth, the argument was escalating
“What about me? Do you think it didn’t completely break me to see you crying so badly over him? I’m telling you I felt my heart shatter with every tear and sniffle you let out”
“I don’t care if I got hurt by him, if it was for you. I’ll let myself get hurt for you” Heeseung knew where this was leading as well, but he couldn’t hold back anymore, this may have not been the circumstances he wanted it to be but it was now never
“Why would you allow that Heeseung? I don’t even want you to get hurt especially for me”
“Because I love you too much to see you hurt by him!“
He finally said it. He finally confessed the pent up emotions he’s being dying to tell you but was always so afraid to tell you in fear of ruining everything you both built together.
“I can’t hold this back anymore. I’m so sorry but I love you to damn much to see you get hurt by him, if I had to, I would punch him again if it meant you were happy”
“I always want you to be happy and be loved by someone who sees how amazing you are, and he was so damn stupid for not realizing the girl of his dreams was right in front of him”
“He’s so stupid for not accepting you into his heart because he didn’t want commitment”
“Even if I was scared of commitment, I would still love you as much as I love you you now. I wouldn’t hesitate to except you into my heart”
“I wanted to be his position. I always wanted to know what it was like to be so loved by you” Before Heeseung could finish his sentence he felt your lips crash onto his, he couldn’t process it at first
You were kissing him. This wasn’t a dream, but rather reality, you were actually kissing him. When he realized this was reality, he was quick to place his hand on the nape of your neck to bring you closer to him.
The way your lips fit each other made it seem like they were made only for each other. The kiss was a desperate one, you tried to put every emotion he made you feel into the kiss and Heeseung want to prove everything he said was true to you.
Heeseung always hoped to lose himself in your paradise, now he was finding himself experienced what he always hoped for.
He was finally losing himself in the paradise of you.
When you and Heeseung broke from the kiss, you both heavily panted trying to catch your breaths. You looked at each other and suddenly broke out into a feverish smile.
“In case it wasn’t obvious, I love you too Heeseung” He was quick to place another kiss onto your lips and you giggled against it
He pulled away once again and held you into a hug, the tension that was built up between the two of you soon faded away. You hugged him back and you hoped that this means you could look past what the fake relationship had brought and possible create a new one with him.
“I don’t think I want you to be my fake boyfriend anymore, I want you to be my real one” Your voice was warm as you spoke against the hugged, you could feel his smile growing on his face as he nodded his head
He pulled away from the hug and lovingly looked into your eyes. He saw the love that pooled in your eyes, and he was happy he was on the receiving end of it.
You didn’t expect that you would ever look at anyone’s way other than Heeseung’s friend but Heeseung changed that. He made you realize that there was such thing as pure love and you could have it with him.
You were happy that you accepted Heeseung to be your fake boyfriend because now he could finally be your real boyfriend.
Heeseung never knew this day would come, he thought he was stuck to admire you from afar. But now he was finally getting the honors to be your boyfriend, he wouldn’t want it to be any other way.
“Will you allow me to get lost in your paradise?”
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inbloomwriting · 1 year
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If I had you II Jamie Tartt
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Plot: Jamie Tartt is hard to love. At least he thinks so. Reader thinks it's the easiest thing in the world. Pairing: Jaime Tartt x female reader Warnings: Swearing, mentions of food and alcohol. Notes: This is inspired by the song "a daydream away". It's 5.2k words of pure friends-to-lovers sweetness.  Likes, reblogs, comments are all much appreciated. I am German. Sometimes I get the tense wrong or make mistakes. I am useless when it comes to punctuation. Go easy on me, please
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Jamie Tartt is hard to love. At least he thinks so. It’s a chore to love him, the real him not the overly confident golden boy he portrays on the pitch. Just look at his track record, that just proves his point. Sure his mom loves him, he never questioned that, but that doesn’t mean it’s easy for her. He’s convinced he’s made her cry more than once with yet another stupid decision. Then there’s his father who loves nothing more than to belittle him and lay out all his flaws for him and the world to see. And if even your own dad doesn’t love you, how can you expect others to. 
So maybe that’s the reason he doesn’t let anyone close enough to even begin to love him. Sooner or later they’ll figure out how much of an effort it takes and that he, of all people, truly isn’t worth it. 
And maybe, perhaps, that’s also the reason he doesn’t allow himself to explore the feelings he harbors for his best friend. He tried to deny them to himself for so long. Tried to pass it off as pure, unfiltered friendship. That’s bullshit though. He knows the feelings are there and there is no use in denying them. That doesn’t mean he can ever allow himself to act on them though. He’d just fuck it all up, the way he usually does with everything he touches. 
The shiny hardwood floor feels cold and smooth as he sits leaning against the kitchen counter, legs stretched out before him. A smile is permanently etched onto his face as (Y/N) talks about something that happened at her work today. He should listen, it’s probably a fun story judging by the way her giggles make her stop talking every few seconds. He should listen but he is so enamored with her that he can not pay attention to anything else. In a perfect world, in a world where loving him was easy, he’d lean over and kiss her. He'd kiss her silly and she’d kiss him back and life would be sweet and it would make sense. In that perfect world, she would love him back the same way he loves her and it would be easy and he’d deserve her. 
But that is not the world he’s living in. That is not his reality. Just a beautiful daydream he allows himself to escape to every once in a while. Loving her in a daydream is safe. It’s secret and quiet and there is no hurt there and no rejection. 
“Why are you grinning like that, huh Tartt?” 
She asks before taking a sip from the beer bottle clasped tightly in her hands. It’s an unusually hot summer’s day. One that makes it impossible to do anything but sit on the floor in as little clothing as possible and drink one cold drink after the other. Even if that means getting a little tipsy on a Tuesday afternoon.
“Nothing. Just happy to have you here. Missed you.”
“We didn’t see each other for a week and you already missed me?”
He misses her the minute she leaves. It’s like his heart isn’t complete if she isn’t there but he can’t really say that can he? Friends don’t tell friends things like that. And a friend is all she is. His best one but still. Telling her any of this could jeopardize their friendship and Jamie doesn’t think he could handle life without her. Not when a week already felt like torture. 
“Well yeah, I’m proper shit at cooking. I need you to feed me.” 
“Oh, is that so? Thought Mr. Bigshot footballer could get free food at any restaurant he fancies.”
She’s teasing but never mean and never hurtful. That’s something he cherishes so much about their friendship. His feelings, his fears — all of it is safe with her. There is no hurt or pain or fear. Just her and her friendship and warmth. And a pair of open arms ready to catch him whenever he stumbles and falls.
“True. But some fancy place in Mayfair will laugh at me if I ask them to make me dino nuggets, won’t they?”
Her laughter, he decides then, is his favorite sound in the world. It makes everything feel alright even if it’s just for a fleeting moment. He needs to keep his feelings locked up in that beautiful daydream because he can never lose this melody her laughter creates. And anyway, he wouldn’t even know what to do if he ever really had her.
— It’s not like she’d say yes anyway.
“You’re probably right about that,” she says and leans her head against his shoulder. And though it’s muggy and hot and he’s sure he can feel their skin stick together, he doesn’t shake her off. She’s part of his heart already, might as well melt into one completely. “You want me to make you some nuggets?” 
“Nah,” Jamie replies and places a soft kiss on the top of her head. Friends kiss friends on the head all the time, everyone knows that. Right? "That's okay. Already had a Kebab with Roy earlier.” 
“You guys are becoming friends then? Should I be worried I’m gonna lose my best friend status?” 
Jamie lets out some mix between a chuckle and a scoff. As if anyone in all the world could ever replace her. What a ridiculous thought. 
“Well he doesn’t make me nuggets, does he? No alphabet soup either. So no. Not yet.” 
The little shake of her fist she does in victory makes him grin even bigger. He must look like a damn fool. 
“I should probably get going sometime soon, I need to finish up some work and do laundry and do all that boring adult stuff that’s waiting for me at home.” 
There are lots of things he should be doing instead of sitting on his kitchen floor on a Tuesday afternoon getting half drunk on cheap beer and half on his overwhelming love for her. He’s sure there are a bunch of texts and emails waiting for him to sort through. Keeley might be popping a blood vessel soon if he doesn’t answer her about that brand requesting to work with him on some ad campaign. And he will get back to her — soon. 
Right now it doesn’t matter. Right now all that matters is him and (Y/N) and their little corner of safety and — home.
“But I don’t want to.” 
“Yeah, me neither. Just want to sit here with you and — “ 
“ — hang out?” 
“Mh. Hang out.” 
That was not what he wanted to say but none of the words ghosting through his head are meant to be spoken out loud. They are his to feel and think and keep hidden and quiet. 
“Good, we can hang out a little longer I think.” 
And he’ll take what he can get. All the precious minutes she grants him he cherishes. 
Right now could last forever and he wouldn’t mind at all.
Not as long as he’s with her.
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Some early 00s pop song is blasting from the speakers of the bar. Everyone’s in good spirits and drinks are flowing freely. 
(Y/N) is leaning against the bar talking to Colin, laughing about something he said, radiating joy and happiness. 
She loves his friends, his boys, his family. Jamie loves that she loves them so dearly, so fiercely as if they are her own family. At this point, they might as well be. She remembers all their birthdays, drops by unannounced with cookies for everybody, cheers them on louder than anybody else. Hell, she even gets Roy to smile and that’s quite something. She’s as much a part of the AFC Richmond family as she is a part of his life. 
“Jamie-Jam-Jam what are you sulking over here for,” her voice cuts through the crowd and the music as she slides into the booth next to him. She looks gorgeous in the hazy neon lights. Then again, she always looks gorgeous. 
“Not sulking. Just — thinking.” 
“About what?”
You. He’d say if he was honest and not such a coward. You and how much I adore you and how hard it is not to tell you any of this and fuck up our friendship. 
“Was considering getting me nipples pierced. I’d have to take them out though and I imagine that would be quite annoying.” 
“Probably,” she agrees and nods her head before adding “It would look sick though.” 
“Right? I reckon it would.” 
She laughs at that and once again it shakes his entire world. Like little earthquakes inside his heart. 
Her voice is quieter after her laughter subsides, soft and gentle, and with the loud music it feels like her words are only meant for him. “I like this,” she says almost wistfully.
“The song? Who’s that, Rihanna?” 
“Not the song, silly boy. This — “ she gestures around the room towards all their friends, dancing and laughing and having the time of their lives. And then she motions to the two of them, secluded and safe inside their own little bubble. “escaping our busy lives for a moment.” 
“Lot of journalists would disagree with you there, love. That my life was busy.” 
“They don’t know you like I know you.” 
There’s a sincerity in her eyes, a warmth, something he can’t quite explain. It’s familiar and foreign all at once. 
“No one knows me like you do. You had pity on Jamie Tartt, messy little prick from math class. They just know Jamie Tartt, the footballer from Richmond.Still a prick but now with better hair.” 
Before he knows what’s happening, her hands take hold of his face and gently rest against his cheeks, forcing him to look at her. Really look at her.
“I never had pity on you, Jamie. I thought you were funny and exciting and infinitely cool. That’s why I wanted to be your friend. And I was right! About the funny part, not the cool part.” 
“Obviously.” 
“But I never took pity on you. I don’t think you realize how highly I think of you. Now let me get a sip of that drink.” 
He’s still in some sort of haze brought on by her words when a groan coming from her shakes him from his thoughts. Her face is all scrunched up in disgust as she places his glass back on the table. “Ew, what the fuck is that?” 
“I’m not sure, honestly. Barkeeper said she’d mix me a Jamie Tartt and I was like fuck yeah, a drink named after me.”
“It’s disgusting. Did you shag and dump her at some point? Like, is she mad at you for some reason?” 
“I don’t think I’ve ever seen that woman before in my life … so yeah maybe.” 
Shaking her head with a smirk on her face she grabs a hold of his hand and pulls him out of the booth and towards the bar on the other side of the place, the one with the older male bartender with the impressive beard.
“You ever had a thing with him?” she asks as she leans against the counter, trying to get the man’s attention.
“Nah, I’d remember that facial hair.” 
From then on the night tastes like tequila and beer and it feels like a warm hug. She doesn’t join in on all his drinks, stops herself after a beer and a shot, but she does join him in all the other shenanigans. Like when they make up ridiculous backstories for strangers and have a laugh about some corporate douchebag trying desperately to get with some woman who clearly has no interest in him. 
“Henry from accounting.”
“Nah, that’s Charlie from HR.” 
“Well, either way, Maisie from South Shields is not interested.” 
He could stay here forever, laugh the night away. Drunk on happiness, on love — and also on quite a lot of booze. 
“Come on, Jamie-Jam, “ she says and hands him his jacket. She’s all gentle hands and gentle eyes. “Let me give you a ride home.” 
“We’re going home?”
“I think it’s time. Think someone had a little too much.” 
“I’m sorry.” 
He is but also not. He’s sorry for being a burden — again. He’s not sorry for letting himself enjoy a night of unadulterated happiness with the people that mean the most to him.
“No need to apologize, Jamie. I’m glad you had fun. Now come on, silly boy. I’m tired.”
And when they step out of the place and into the night, all sweaty and hair a mess, he thinks that of all the things his eyes have ever seen, the best by far is her. Then and always. 
London passes by in a blur as (Y/N) drives them towards his house. All the bougie buildings and the iron fences and the trees in the parks, it’s all one kaleidoscope of color, a smudge of light and shadows. 
It’s not like he can really focus on that though. Partly because all he can think of is her and partly because he’s absolutely wasted. Mostly her though. Definitely mostly her.
“Did you have a good time?” his voice slices through the comfortable silence.
“I always have a good time when I’m with you, silly boy. Did you?” 
He rests his cheek against the smooth leather of her car seats and regards her with an infinite sense of wonder and adoration. In any other situation, this position would be deeply uncomfortable but he’s numb to anything but the beating of his heart and the strings that pull him towards his best friend.
“Obviously. Had my best girl with me. “
“Keeley?”
His eyebrows raise in confusion. “Keeley? No you numpty, you!” 
“Me?”
“Why would you think I was talking about Keeley?”
He wishes he could see the look on her face. This is not a car conversation. 
“Uh, she’s the only real adult relationship you ever had and you had a poster of her on your wall. Makes one think things. In fact, I believe that poster is still up.”
Jamie can’t help but scoff at her words. Not in a dismissive way necessarily but this whole conversation seems so silly to him. Yeah, he loved Keeley in a way and yeah she’s still one of his best friends but never has she come close to (Y/N). Keeley hardly ever got to see the real Jamie, the one that didn’t hide behind this larger-than-life footballer persona. (Y/N) met him before that persona even existed.
“Stop thinking things then. You’re my best girl, always.”
He still can’t see her face since she is looking at the road in front of them, but he can see the smile pulling the corner of her lips upwards, and for the moment that’s good enough for him.
Her car comes to a stop in front of Jamie's house but while he drags himself out of his seat, she stays put. 
“What are you doing, love?” 
“Dropping you off?” 
“Are you not coming inside then?” 
“Do you want me to come inside? We spent pretty much all week with each other, I thought you might be sick of me by now.” 
A ridiculous thought if he’s ever heard one. He could never get sick of her. They could be glued to each other for the rest of eternity and he wouldn’t mind one bit. 
Even in his drunk state of mind though, he realizes that’s not something he can tell her. That crosses out of friend territory. So he just chuckles and rolls his eyes.
“Do I want you to come in? What a dumb question is that? Of course, I do. I have a bag of those disgusting spicy crisps waiting for you in my kitchen.”
“In that case —” 
10 minutes later they’re sitting on his couch, her legs across his lap, munching away at those god-awful crisps as some overly dramatic American home renovation show flickers across the TV screen. 
In moments like these, love lives here. In these walls and on this couch. And it’s terrifying because thinking about love also makes him think of the possibility of losing it. But every once in a while, Jamie lets himself feel a tiny bit of it. Just enough to keep him going. 
“Hey Jamie,” she speaks up, her face only illuminated by the light coming from the TV. She’s wearing his shirt and he wills himself not to focus too hard on that because that will cause images to ghosts through his mind that he can’t allow himself to ever think about. Images that cross every line ever drawn when it comes to friendships.
“Yes, love?” 
“You’re my best boy too. Not sure I ever told you.” 
He doesn’t answer, not in words at least. But he squeezes her legs as they rest on him, and he hopes she knows. Oh god if only she knew. 
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Jamie Tartt is hard to love. At least he thinks so. (Y/N) knows he thinks so because he let it slip once or twice when he was drunk and his words were all jumbled and his mind was all hazy. 
And every damn time it breaks her fucking heart. Because loving Jamie Tartt is the easiest thing she ever did. It comes as natural as breathing. It feels like a nice ray of summer sun on her skin, sizzling and exciting and warm.
Loving Jamie is a gift.
Now if only there was a way she could make him realize that. But every time he lets himself be even a little vulnerable he is so quick to cover the cracks with stupid jokes or misplaced arrogance before a real conversation can happen. 
She needs him to realize it though. To understand that loving him isn’t difficult. Because how can you tell someone you love them and make them understand just how much they mean to you when they deem themself unlovable? 
Turning her head to the side she looks at his sleeping face. Somewhere between Fixer Upper and House Hunters, he fell asleep, leaving her alone with her thoughts. He’s snoring something awful but she still thinks he’s adorable. Jamie has a mischievous, lovable quality to him that just makes you open your heart to him whether you want to or not. Yeah, sure, he’s let people down, he’s done shitty things, but he’s trying. He’s learned and he’s changed and the price for being young and stupid and cocky should not be a life spent questioning if you deserve other people’s love. 
Jamie Tartt is not hard to love. But loving him and not being able to tell him because he doesn’t love you in quite the same way, that’s just fucking cruel.
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The air is loaded with static. Everyone is on the edge of their seat. (Y/N) is huddled in between Rebecca and Keeley, holding their hands and nervously biting at her lip. Emotions are running high as Richmond is playing Manchester. Correction — they’re not only playing them, they are kicking their asses.
It’s 2-0 for Richmond and they’re already 1 minute into the 3 minutes of additional time. If Manchester doesn’t get a miracle, Richmond wins. The thought of that makes a fluttery feeling spread in (Y/N)’s stomach. If this is how she feels, she can only imagine what Jamie must feel like. 
1:30
2 minutes
2:30
3 minutes.
“Blow the whistle. Come on. Blow the fucking whistle.” 
And as if he heard her pleading, the referee blows the whistle giving Richmond their win. 
Laughter and cheers and songs fill the air as every Richmond fan is on their feet celebrating a win they so desperately wanted and that the team fought so hard for.
The win Jamie fought so hard for. 
She tries to find him across the pitch but there are too many people, hugging and celebrating, too much noise. She just hopes he knows how proud she is.
And she hopes that somewhere out there his dad is watching. Sees him win, with the team he doesn’t approve of. Watches him succeed and be the man he never was and never will be.
She hopes somewhere deep in the inky black pit that is his heart, he finds a glimmer of pride for his only son, even if it comes entirely belated.
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Jamie has won quite a few matches by now and it’s always a great feeling but some wins stand out. This is one of them.
His heart is filled with gratitude and pride, and his entire system is flooded with adrenaline and utter euphoria. He’s positively buzzing as the team gathers in the hallway leading toward the locker room. Some of them have been whisked away to give short post-match interviews — as if there is much to say other than how fucking awesome it feels to win — while the others are waiting for them to come back so they can all meet up at the locker room for some after match briefing. 
“Superstar, you did it!” 
Her voice carries through the hallway above the rest of all the noise. Like a siren calling out to him, she can’t hear anything but her, it all shifts into the background.
She weaves through the crowd like a fucking goddess in blue. He always thought she looked good in the Richmond colors and seeing her with his name on her back never fails to make his heart shutter with delight. But there’s something about today that makes this even more special. 
Maybe it’s the adrenaline of winning. Of making his mom proud and proving his dad wrong. Of proving himself wrong. Maybe it’s seeing her in his kit, with his name and his number smiling that radiant smile of hers. Maybe it’s a combination of all these things. But something makes his brain short-circuit for a moment. Just a fleeting moment but long enough to make him push through the crowd until he’s standing in front of her, matching smiles on their faces. Just long enough for him to softly place one hand on her waist and pull her closer, so unbelievably close. Just long enough to cradle her face in his other hand, gentle and careful, like the most precious thing in the world. Long enough for him to place his lips on hers in a kiss so sweet, so long in the making, it feels surreal. It feels like he’s still stuck in his saccharine daydream.
And then reality snaps back and he pulls away, opening his eyes to a smiling (Y/N) staring back up at him through curious eyes.
“Silly boy, what was that?” 
She doesn’t sound upset, in fact, his delusions might even make him think she sounds delighted. 
“I — “ 
“Jamie, locker room. Let’s go, boy!” 
Ted’s voice calls out to him all full of glee and jubilation. The guy sounds even more chipper than usual and that says a whole lot. 
Pulling away from her feels like having a bubble suddenly popped. Every what-if that has been clouded by post-win euphoria suddenly bears their ugly head again. Sometimes Jamie wishes his thoughts weren’t so fucking loud all the time.
“Go, your coach is asking for you. I’ll see you at the after-party. We’ll talk then, yeah?”
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Only they don’t because, for some inexplicable reason, Jamie avoids her like the plague.
Everyone is gathered at the bar for celebratory drinks, it’s a private function, just the team and family and associates. Spirits are high, everyone’s excited. And all things considered this night should be magical. Only it’s not, because once again Jamie refuses to let himself be loved.
Rejection tastes bitter. It’s sharp and metallic. Rejection also tastes quite a lot like tequila.
The salt, the lime, the liquor — it’s supposed to make her feel better. It’s supposed to mend the cracks in her heart, if only for a night. 
It doesn’t do any of that, it only makes her fucking sad.
How foolish of her to believe that he’d feel the same, that he’d finally pick up on the hints she’s been dropping for over a decade and reciprocate the feelings. Maybe they never stood a chance anyway. Maybe —
No, actually fuck that.
He can’t do this, it’s unfair. You don’t kiss someone, not like that at least, and then ignore them for the rest of the night. Especially not when that person is your best fucking friend.
Bumping against people left and right, she makes her way across the room to stand next to a smiling Jamie deep in conversation with a pretty girl, who (Y/N) is quite sure is the sister of one of his teammates.
“I need to talk to you.” It’s not a request. Not this time. This conversation has been a long time coming. It’s time, she thinks, to finally be brave. One can only swallow down their feelings and emotions for so long, until they come bubbling to the surface like a fucking volcano rolling over Pompeii. She just hopes that once the dust settles there will be hope instead of death and destruction.
“Uh, kind of in the middle of something here.” 
She can’t stand this part of him. This fake, unbothered cool guy who has no empathy for her or anyone other than himself. She hates it mostly because this is not the real Jamie, just some cardboard cutout version of him.
“Too bad, that'll have to wait.” 
She doesn’t give him another second to resist or shake her off, just grabs onto his arm and pulls him through the crowd and towards the exit.
The nightly London air feels cold against her skin, making her shiver as goosebumps appear on her arms.
“What the fuck is going on with you?”
“What the fuck is going on with me?”
He can’t be serious.
“Yeah. I had something going there. She was well fit too.”
The urge to smack him across his stupidly handsome face is seriously fighting her desire to kiss him again right about now.
“Good for her but you owe me a conversation.”
“(Y/N), I — “ 
The way he rolls his eyes so dismissively, so suave and cool, it’s like a dagger straight to the heart.
“No, you know what — fuck you, Jamie. I know you have a hard time letting people in completely, and I get that that’s something you have to work through on your own time but the way you're treating me right now is really shit. You can’t kiss me like that and then run. I’ve been waiting for that fucking kiss for over a decade.” 
“What?” 
He looks at her with the signature Jamie Tartt look of confusion and innocence. Like a damn puppy or something. And if she wasn’t so annoyed, so hurt, maybe she’d find it endearing.
“I’m in love with you, Jamie. I’ve been in love with you since the day I met you. I’ve been in love with you since I was sat next to you in class and you asked me if Pythagoras was that French guy. I’ve loved you when you were just a chaotic teenager. I’ve loved you when you won your first game and when you lost. I’ve loved you when you signed your first contract and when you made a complete fool of yourself on that ridiculous tv show. And I love you now. So to think you finally picked up on it and reciprocate my feelings was — I was so happy, Jamie. Only for you to completely ignore me for the rest of the night. I don’t deserve that. Not from you of all people. “
“Will you let me talk?”
“No, I’m not done yet.”
“Alright, go on.”
“I love you, Jamie and I know you think I shouldn’t and that you don’t deserve it, but guess what? I don’t care. I love you anyway and I am not asking for permission to love you. That’s not how it works. And I don’t love you despite your flaws, I love them too. Even your stupid 2003 looking haircut and your ridiculous clothes that make you look like a male Bratz doll sometimes. Sorry people in your life made you feel like you had to earn it just because they couldn’t see how phenomenal you are. Just you, Jamie Tartt, messy little prick.” 
Silence wraps around them like a thick blanket as a moment passes, then two. Jamie raises his eyebrows in question.
“Can I?”
“Yes, you can!”
“Jesus, alright. Stop yelling at me.”
“Well, I’m upset!”
“And I’m sorry about that. I never meant to upset you. Ever. I just — do you remember that one birthday, I think I turned 12, when me dad showed up and he was just being his usual asshole self and he made me play against him and then yelled at me in front of all the guests when he won? “
She sure does. Even at 12, she wanted to put her tiny little fist straight between Mr. Tartt’s eyebrows. “Yes.”
“You sat with me when I went to my room to escape. Refused to leave my side. Called my dad a wanker and you made me laugh. Then you got me a piece of cake and we ate it on my bed while watching Spongebob.” A smile plays on his lips as he reminisces about that day.
“I was 12 and I didn’t know a lot but I knew that night that I was in love with you and I immediately promised myself I wasn’t gonna do anything about it. Losing you is the scariest thing I can think about and my track record with people is pretty shit, honestly. So yeah I didn’t want to even risk fucking up with you. Rather have you as a friend than not have you at all.”
“So why did you kiss me earlier after all?”
“For one, you looked so fit in blue, with my name on your back. I was full of adrenaline and just so fucking happy. I uh — I think my mind was telling me that it’s finally time to be brave for once.”
Hearing him say it, it’s something she never expected but always hoped for. She’s played this scene out so many times in her dreams and yet she doesn’t know what to say or do now that it is actually happening.
“So what now?”
“Well, if you let me, I was gonna kiss you. Because if you think that other kiss was great, this next one is going to change your life.”
As those words fall from his lips, (Y/N) can’t get close to him quick enough. Pulling him towards her by the front of his shirt. Closer and closer until there is no room left between them and he gently nuzzles his nose against hers. 
“Jamie Tartt?” 
“Hmm?”
“Change my life!”
Jamie Tartt is hard to love. At least he thought so. And maybe a part of him still does and always will. But kissing (Y/N), his best girl, the fucking love of his life, it feels quite easy to let himself be loved. 
Feels as easy as breathing. And for once in his life, the reality is so much sweeter than the daydream. 
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understandingbimbos · 7 months
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Bimbo Types, or Neapolitan Bimbo
(This is something I've previously gone over in my My Little Pony post but wanted to reiterate here.)
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Bimbo can most easily be divided into three distinct archetypes. The Clown, The Innocent, and The Debutante. These archetypes are not absolute, they come in many variations and their traits can and will overlap.
The Clown, also known as The Free Spirit or The Wildcard, usually shows up as the comedic relief. They can be loud, showy, excessive, and obnoxious. Their sexuality is very self-assured, self-aware, and playful. The Clown's main concern (if any) is having or spreading fun, "fun" in this context being completely up to their individual style and personality. To give a very stereotypical example, a goth clown may have the most fun watching very violent horror movies or playing with spiders. Another clown could have the most fun (Incidentally) causing a ruckus or being mischievous, it's all about perspective, the possibilities are pretty much endless.
Examples of this archetype include but are not limited to: Jeannie (IDOJ), Pinkie Pie (MLP:FIM), Harley Quinn (BTAS), Synclaire James (Living Single), Jayne Mansfield (films and public persona), Elvira, Mistress of the Dark
The Innocent, also known as The Ingenue, is just as the name suggests. Not only helpless but often unaware and wholly out of her depth. Her inexperience and or meekness makes her prone to being taken advantage of. Despite this, she (usually) remains positive, kind, and happy to help. Unlike The Clown, The Innocent's sexuality is typically portrayed as natural, uncomplicated, and unintended.
Examples of this archetype include but are not limited to: Marilyn Monroe (films and public persona), Weena (The Time Machine), Lorelei Lee (in the novel), Elissa Megan Powers (Empowered)
The Debutante, who could also be called The Alpha Bitch, is probably the most popular in the modern era and who you're most likely to come across in real life or on social media. Her sexuality is mainly a means of control. She puts a lot of time, work, and effort into her appearance because beauty is both her business and capital. While she may, at times, enjoy and indulge in carnal pleasure it's far from her main concern. Being the most or unattainably desirable is how she knows she's better than others, how she's able to acquire and maintain control. The Debutante values social standing above all else, to her it's a matter of life or death, she would die without overwhelmingly positive attention.
Examples of this archetype include but are not limited to: Regina George (Mean Girls), Heather Chandler (Heathers), Courtney Shayne (Jawbreaker), Heather (Total Drama Island), Cleopatra Smith (Clone High), Jeannie II (IDOJ), Emma Frost (X-Men), Panty Anarchy (PSG), Ginger (Gilligan's Island), Holly Golightly (Breakfast at Tiffany's), Kim Kardashian, Rarity (MLP:FIM)
These archetypes are combined, remixed, and subverted so often it's hard to find pure examples (I tried my best, and even then this is just reducing them to their base archetypes and do not accurately describe every single one of these characters), but this is a good thing. It leads to nuance and diversity, and many of the most popular bimbo characters are mixed or subversions. Chrissy Snow (Three's Company) is a Clown and an Innocent. Elle Woods (Legally Blonde) arguably includes elements of all three. Romy and Michele's High School Reunion follows two clownish Innocents who realize they were bullied by debutantes. As far as I know, all bimbos exist somewhere along these lines (or perhaps on an axis) but we shouldn't view this as limiting, when you think about it the combinations are really seemingly endless, and I didn't even cover sub-archetypes! Many Debutantes are mean but they don't have to be. Innocents don't have to be completely pliable, you can do (or be) whatever you like, even moving from one archetype to another.
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callsign-datura · 7 months
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Hiya! I hope you're doing well, I really really like your writings, I was wondering if you'll do a second part to the "ghosting fuckbuddy ghost" wherever it's to get him to apologize to reader in person, a happy ending or just making amends, have a wonderful day!☆
a/n: thanks! appreciate the love!
He'd been trying to contact you for days. Literally days. Texting you. Not trying any of your social medias because he had no idea if you had any other accounts and at the time he didn't give enough of a shit to figure that out. He was thinking over the development of your entire relationship and kicking himself over everything. Kicking himself for being so goddamn stupid as to fuck up the best thing in his life, kicking himself for being so rude to you... He'd made peace with the fact you probably wouldn't want to be with him anymore.
His texts... he tried his best to make them seem remorseful. Not that he wasn't feeling remorseful, because he definitely fucking was, but he was trying his hardest to portray that in one of the least reliable formats possible; but the only one he could use. He didn't expect a text back but he was hoping for one.
He was sitting in his living room, a book in his lap and his phone in his pocket when he felt it buzz. He took it out of his pocket to check the notification, and his heart sunk... a text from you. "you fucked up, simon. i appreciate the fact you're trying to make up for this and apologize but i can't accept it knowing you'll just take this for granted again." He immediately opened the message, and started typing in a response. "i realized that i fucked up. i know i took you for granted and I'm sorry. you don't have to give this another try and I'm not expecting you to by any means, i just want you to know that I'm sorry. so goddamn sorry for not realizing what i had before it was gone and so goddamn sorry for bein an idiot. if you were to give me another chance i'd do everything in my power to make sure it wasn't wasted." He pressed send, and he watched as the message bubble appeared on his screen, then the text beside it changed to "read". His heart sunk further and he put his phone down, waiting for your response. A moment later his phone buzzed again. "i can't do this unless you're willing to give a relationship a try, or at least go out on a few dates with me. i can't deal with being your fuckbuddy." The word 'fuckbuddy' stung his heart. His vision blurred for a moment but he couldn't help but be filled with a sense of hope at your response. "does 'going out on a few dates' mean starting over and giving this another chance?" No response for a minute or so... "i think starting over would be the best thing for both of us" He stopped for a moment. He blinked and released a relieved breath. "you wanna go out for coffee sometime, then? whenever you're free" A smile spread across his lips as he shifted in his seat and read your response. "i'd love to." "how does tomorrow at 6 sound?" His heart swelled.
"yeah, of course. tomorrow at 6." He put his phone down and he rubbed his face, letting out a breath he didn't know he was holding as he tilted his head back. He was more than happy at the fact you were willing to give him a chance... and he vowed to himself that he wouldn't fuck it up this time.
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inkrivelbr · 18 days
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How shameless!
It's not news to Liu Qingge that when he goes on missions, he ends up listening to the famous "Resentment of Chunshan".
But now, it's stranger than usual to hear this obscene song, as he is being courted (even if secretly from the public) by the couple.
Liu Qingge tried his best to ignore the music as he ordered tea at the store.
— Dear listeners, the beloved song has been updated, I hope you like it.
The song continues but halfway through, the singer says.
Liu Qingge was surprised.
— I hope they didn't make it any more obscene.
The singer returned to singing and...
A hot-blooded but loyal man.
A man known for his battles.
Once an enemy, now a friend.
The couple managed to win the heart of the handsome warrior.
Liu Qingge the warlord.
He is certainly the only one with enough resistance and strength.
To handle Xin Mo and Xiu Ya at the same time.
Liu Qingge spits out all the tea, ignoring the indignant scream of the person in front of him.
The music continued but Liu Qingge couldn't help but pay attention to it.
W-what did he just hear??
How did you find out they were courting you??
Why the hell in the song is he portrayed as a blushing virgin maiden?!
Yes he was a virgin before sleeping with them, but that doesn't matter now!
And what is this about holding both at the same time?!
He never...
Binghe is already too big...
B-both...at the same time...
Is this humanly possible?
He can already handle Luo Binghe...what would be more-
Embarrassed by his own thoughts, Liu Qingge pays for the tea and leaves the store.
______
Liu Qingge was panting, with his legs spread as wide as possible so that Luo Binghe could go deeper inside him.
— Qingge is very needy today, you know that whatever you want, just ask.
Says Shen Qingqiu while stroking Liu Qingge's hair as he was lying on Shen Qingqiu's lap.
Liu Qingge blushes, it is very shameless what he wants.
— Shishu, we will not refuse.
Seeing both of them being so kind to him, Liu Qingge finally confesses.
— I-I want you both... at the same time
A silence passed through the room before the couple, with renewed desire, made Liu Qingge's wish.
Liu Qingge actually endured Xin Mo and Xiu Ya at the same time.
The entire night in the Palace was filled with the moans of the Demon Lord and Peak Lord Qing Jing future husband
The servants clapped for Liu Qingge's resistance.
As expected of Bai Zhan's God of War!
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peachypede · 8 months
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I will never not be bitter about how Kamado is portrayed as an shitty guy in the fandom and Volo is uwu pretty boy he was just feeling angsty when he tried to destroy the world and kill protagonist with giratina uwu
Rant below
Kamado, yes, made a horrible decision. He had his reasons. He saw his whole village destroyed by pokemon when he was young and never wanted that to happened again, Beni says they watched their family and friends DIE, so he gave in to his paranoia and banished the protagonist. It’s not an excuse, but he has his reasons for doing so.
And what does Kamado do when he realizes he’s wrong? The man get down on his hands and knees and BEGS your forgiveness. He does the Dogeza, the bow in Japanese culture that is the ultimate form of apology and respect to the other person. Kamado eats dirt and is basically saying “I fucked up so bad and I am so very, very, very sorry.” The Dogeza also is performed to show high respect, so Kamado is basically telling you as well that you far surpass his position. Your emperor levels of worthiness and strength. I think the amount of how embarrassing and humble this pose is is lost to people in the Western culture but this is a BIG apology and possibly even the BEST apology Kamado could gives since it’s an apology beyond words. He also apologizes to everyone else, telling them they were right and he was wrong.
"I acted on ill-considered presumptions and drove you from the Galaxy Expedition Team, forcing you to face great hardship alone…”
And you change Kamado. He becomes more willing to delegate and work with other people. He follows your lead. Hell, he has a line after you beat him on Prelude Beach where he basically calls you a god, that’s how much this dude respects you now.
"Perhaps you are a divine being yourself, sent to bring us gifts from above…”
The guy takes no credit for the victory on mount coronet, he says it’s all you!
"I know I've no right to say this... But we are truly fortunate to have been able to count you among the Survey Corps' ranks. If you had not joined us, we would have fallen on Mount Coronet. We would have lost our home. We would have lost our future."
He is a truly changed man in the end.
"I used to think that Pokémon were terrifying creatures. You've helped me see otherwise."
Volo on the other hand? Tricks you, betrays you, and then tries to KILL YOU. Kamado was always upfront from the beginning that he didn’t trust you, but Volo? He’s buddy-buddy with you to take advantage of you.
And he’s the reason why this all happened! He created the rift, displaced pokemon and hell some people since Ingo obviously fell in through this rift too (People blame Arceus for this :/ ) and nearly killed everyone in Hisui with rampaging nobles and origin forme Dialga or Palkia.
And in the end, Volo doesn’t apologize at all. The dude doesn’t even change.
"Someday, I'll solve every riddle in the legends of Hisui's Pokémon. And on that day, I'll stand before Arceus at last—No, I will CONQUER it! No matter how many years, how many decades, how many centuries it takes me!"
I’m just fully convinced at this point that it 100% has to do with Volo being pretty and Kamado not being that attractive.
My hot take of the new year: Kamado is WAY better husband material than Volo could ever be.
Anyway my rant is over…no hate on Volo lovers, I do think he’s a fun character to rotate like a chicken on a spit in your brain but this has been my biggest grievance in the PLA fandom.
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ijwrsmff · 11 months
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I really hope requests are still open, I adore Mihawk and I love when he’s portrayed as secretly caring, especially when he’s loving towards his wife in the stories that have him and AFAB reader.
I’m sadly sick with what I think is Covid and just trying to imagine how Mihawk would be like if he were to try to care for a sick wife that he loves. (Not necessarily with Covid lol) but with the aches and pains and having to rest and eat and drink healthy but her not wanting to be bedridden.
He is just. So husband material. And I hope you start to feel better soon ;-; sometimes when I'm sick, I like a nice little sick reader story with characters I love so I feel you XD Hopefully this helps a little bit ^~^
Word Count: 1,144
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Of course you were sick. What wonderful timing. Mihawk was due to return today, after a week of traveling to hunt a notorious pirate. You were sure it was no big deal, he was the best swordsman in the world. It wasn’t hard for you to worry about him, but you trusted him. You knew the second the both of you got together, you would get married and he would burn the world to keep you safe. 
However he couldn’t exactly protect you from your own sickness. You don’t even know how you got it! Zoro and Perona weren’t even on the island, doing their own thing. You highly doubted those monkeys he trained were close enough to you in order to get you sick. No, this was just some freak occurrence, to get horribly sick the day your husband came home. Which was just your luck. You missed him so much, but you couldn’t be around him, knowing you’d probably get him sick too. 
When you heard him enter the front door, you tried to get up out of bed but your legs collapsed without even taking a few full steps. He heard it, always being perceptive and you heard his footsteps speed up until he had barged into your shared room. “Darling? Are you alright?” He took in your appearance, seeing the bags under your eyes and how much you shook in place from your position on the floor. 
“I see…you’re sick. I can call a doctor to come as soon as possible, until then I’ll make you food to help and-” He leaned down towards you, but you covered your mouth as you coughed. “What…are you doing?” He went to pick you up but you feebly moved his hand away from you. 
“You’ll get sick too!” Your eyes would have been wide with worry, but you could barely keep them open. “You can’t…you can’t get sick…” The words took what seemed like forever to get out, and you couldn’t catch your breath hardly at all. “You have work to do…I…I can’t…” You nearly collapsed on the floor, but he of course caught you. 
He gave you a reassuring smile, “I’ll nurse you back to health as much as I can.” Mihawk picked you up, and you didn’t have the strength to fight him. “If you think something like a sickness can prevent me from working, you haven’t much faith in me, do you?” He chuckled, as he made the joke that caused you to laugh quietly too.
“I’m…I’m sorry…I feel so weak…letting it get to me…” You muttered as he placed you back down on the bed. It was so cold…you were already bundled up, but reached for the covers anyway. He raised an eyebrow at that, and put the thinnest of the blankets over you as he placed a hand to your forehead. 
“And I’m also sorry, love. You have quite the fever, try not to overheat yourself.
I know it feels cold, but wearing such heavy clothes along with the large comforter would only agitate the fever more.” He rubbed your shoulders and you winced. Everything was just so sore. Mihawk was always so gentle with you, but especially in this moment. It wasn’t the first time you got sick, but this seemed worse than a lot of other times you had been through. “Don’t worry, in sickness and in health, remember?” 
He smiled, and when he went to walk away your arm reached out to try and stop him. “It’s alright, I’m just getting a rag to put on your forehead.” He held that hand that reached out to him, and placed a kiss on the top of it. The action always made you smile, and you could feel your eyes closing knowing he was there to help you. 
Like he said, he returned quickly with the soaked rag. He placed it carefully on you, and went back to rubbing your neck and shoulders. It was quiet, but not awkward. Serene almost, with only your occasional coughs to break the silence. His hands weren’t soft, but calloused from years of training and fighting. Even still, just because it was his hands, it still felt blissful to have them run up and down your sore body to try and ease some of the pains. 
“I’m sorry…I just feel so weak…” You muttered, eyes still closed. Though you sighed, partially because of the pains but also because of how safe you felt with his hands trying to alleviate the aches along your body. “I don’t…wanna stay in bed…” You tried to get up, but you were of course stopped as he carefully held you back down. 
“No need to apologize. You might be physically weak now, your brain is strong. Although a bit foggy.” He chuckled and ran his fingers along your scalp, in a soothing manner. “Even if you were weak…I want you to trust me as you always do. Let me be your strength. If you need anything, I’ll be right here to help you.” His eyes were adoring, and though your eyes were closed you could feel that warm smile from him, “If you need water, food, a massage, get out of bed, I can help you. You won’t be walking, but I can carry you where you wish to go.” 
“Thank you…I love you…so much…” You tried to open your eyes, but they closed again almost immediately. “Try not…to get sick…” It made him smile how much you cared. Though he couldn’t care less if he got sick. Especially if it meant him helping you to feel better when you were. You did try to open your eyes when you felt his hands leave you, only to return a few seconds later from beside you. 
“Getting sick would be worth it, if I can make you feel better for even a second.” He chuckled, and wrapped his arms around you. “I can help you feel warmer. But no big blanket.” He cradled you to his side and rubbed your arms and stomach. “I’ll be here by your side until you’re back to full health.” His touch was smooth, and soft. Anything to help you. 
You laughed, and muttered “Cheesy bastard.” Before falling asleep in his arms. He would always help, and be there for anything you needed. He could be halfway across the world, and still be next to you in a moment if you needed him to. You would always be his main priority, sick or healthy. It warmed his heart, to be there when you were sick. He knew you could be stubborn, and not follow a single doctor’s order if you didn’t want to. But regardless, he would make sure you were safe. 
Safe now, forever, and always. Anything for his dearest wife, that he loved more than anyone else in the world. 
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xomakara · 11 months
Text
Only One For Me
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SUMMARY | Hanging out with your friends at the hottest club in Chicago, you never expect to see Johnny after you had left the idol life, your friends and him after a scandal. Johnny says he misses you and shows you how much he really does miss you. PAIRINGS | Johnny/Fem!Reader GENRE | friends to lovers, smut, unprotected sex, fingering, dirty talk, angst, drama, fluff(?) towards the end. RATING | Mature LENGTH | 11,413 words AUTHOR'S NOTE | This was supposed to be short but I guess it turned out longer than I expected LOL. Once my fingers are on a roll, anything is possible haha. Anything in italics is spoken in Korean. Enjoy lol
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Your music is not cut out for it. Who's gonna listen to that shit?
You shook those words from your mind as you tried to focus on what was happening in front of you. The lights were dimmed, there was pumped up music, countless sweaty bodies out on the dance floor, drunks making moves on men and women. It was hard not to focus on anything else but the music that the club was playing was horrible.
Who listened to this crap anymore?
You obviously didn’t.
“Ouu~ this song is my jam!” The dark-skinned girl next to you yelled out, wiggling in your seat. Tori was one of your best friends since high school and was notorious for being a party girl. Even at the age of twenty-eight, all she did was go to clubs, bars, and lounges.
And you blamed her for dragging you there.
“Everything is your jam, Tori!” Another woman, whose blond waves bounced about, yelled back. Becca was your other best friend from high school and was still the smartest person you knew. Since you left for Seoul a few years back, Becca was a successful business owner with a tendency to party nowadays. Tori was most likely rubbing off on her.
“Uh huh, but you’re dancing too!” Tori yelled right back. Both women wiggled in their seats, drinks in one hand.
You never really liked the club scene. You were much more reserved and preferred to be in a bar or lounge, where they tended to play better music and have less sweaty bodies. Those were the places where you got most of the inspiration for writing your own music. You were feeling a bit out of your element here.
“Come on, Y/N. Loosen up and let's get partying.” Becca danced in her seat next to you.
“No thanks.” You shook your head, swirling the alcoholic concoction in your hand with the stirrer. “I feel out of my comfort zone here.”
“Girl, don’t they party in Korea?” Becca asked, taking a sip of whatever drink she ordered, nodding her head to the music.
You shrugged. There were parties in Seoul but you were so busy working that you never had the time to go and party. Your days were packed with dance practices, song rehearsals, variety shows, music programs. It was hard being an idol.
Correction... 
An ex-idol.
You used to be a member of a now popular girl group but left due to differences in music and joined another company. The group you were in, tended to go for the cute songs and concepts but because you were the oldest of the group, you wanted to try something new. Something sexy or mature. But the company and the other girls didn't like it. ‘We would lose our public appeal’, they said.
Another reason why you left, certain sources claimed, was the scandal with a very popular male idol with a huge fanbase. Well… that was how the media portrayed it. But there was some truth to the news.
Glad you’re out of the group. We don’t need a whore like you ruining our reputation. You really thought a girl like you could really be with a top idol like him? Dream on, Y/N.
You shook your head, clearing your mind of those bad memories. In the wake of your scandal, you asked your new company if you could take a leave of absence or go on an indefinite hiatus. They gave you permission, halting what little schedules you had. You cut all your ties to any idol friends and boarded the next available plane to come back to the States. 
And here you were. 
Back home with family and friends.
A place you could truly feel at home.
“I was so busy working that I didn’t have time to party or even go out for drinks.” You replied, taking a sip of your alcoholic beverage. “I feel like I’ve forgotten how to party.”
Tori placed her now empty glass on the table and reached forward to link arms with you and Becca. “Well, come on girl! You’re back home and away from all that negativity! So let’s just have fun and dance!”
She had a point. You were away from all that negativity. All those bad vibes. You had a chance to be free.
The music in this joint still sucked though.
Tori led Becca and you to a clearing in the middle of the dance floor. Back during your high school and college days, you were considered a horrible dancer that lacked confidence but you guess those dance training lessons paid off. You still weren't an amazing dancer like other Korean idols but you could still hold your own. Plus, the alcohol flowing through your body made you feel free and relaxed. Swaying your hips and occasionally doing some body rolls seemed to attract some attention towards your way. You were suddenly feeling the hype and despite the bad music, your body wouldn’t stop moving. You really couldn’t believe that you forgot how to have fun.
“Ouuu~what song is this?” Tori asked excitedly as the beat and tempo of the music changed.
“Are they performing this song live or something?” Becca asked from in front of you.
It wasn't typical club music. That quickly died down to be replaced with the sounds of a live band playing. Different yet familiar to your ears.  The powerful drums, the rhythmic strumming of the guitars and bass, the beautiful melody coming from the keyboard. All sounds that were too familiar.
It couldn’t be, could it?
You shook your head and didn’t even bother to turn around to see who was playing. Chicago always had some new talent out in the streets and it wasn’t uncommon for aspiring singers to be playing a gig.
“I think it’s Korean.” You heard Becca call out.
“How do you know?” Tori asked her.
“I listen to enough K-Pop to know what Korean sounds like.” Becca stated matter of factly. Which was true since she showed you her extensive playlist of popular groups like Stray Kids, Got7, Infinite, etc. “I've never heard of these guys before though. But then again, their music isn’t really my style.”
“You sure it’s in Korean? Sounds like English to me.” Tori softly swayed to the music, joining the crowd that was enraptured by the live band playing and singers singing. “So this is what the bartender meant when he said that there was going to be live playing and singing later.”
“We'll take the highway to heaven And I can't wait to love you all alone (Oh yeah, yeah, yeah, oh yeah, yeah) We'll take the highway to heaven On the 101, let's see just where it goes (Oh yeah yeah yeah yeah, oh yeah yeah)” 
Wait… what? Why did you know this song? And why does it sound like he’s here? It has to be a joke right? You shook your head and pushed the thought to the back of your mind. You were probably going crazy getting cooped up in your room all the time.
“Last call, are you coming with me? I got some things you want to see Tell all your friends that you're busy, they know They know we got the chemistry Love how your body feels on me When you get back, let me get that”
But why did those lyrics sound so damn familiar? You just couldn’t put your mind on it. You were going crazy, weren’t you? Yeah that had to be it.
“Baby you should know, I won't let you go I'll show you the world if you say so Oh, she's so bad (So bad) I'll make it last And baby, I can't leave you alone”
“Why does this song sound so familiar?” You muttered mostly to yourself but Becca heard.
“You know this song?” She asked, clearly feeling the music as she grooved to the pop song.
You shrugged, still a bit confused. This was clearly a Korean song but why is it sung in English? “Kind of. I mean it’s originally in Korean. Are they doing English covers of Korean songs?”
Becca shook her head. “The bartender said that it was a group of Korean men that was going to perform though. Maybe it’s an English version?”
Can’t be… Could it? The boys surely couldn’t be here… You doubt their company would send them to a venue like this. They would normally play in bigger venues.
“Damn, they’re good.” Tori muttered from next to you. She gave you a small smile and nodded to the stage, all the while swaying along to the song. “Do you know them by any chance?”
You sighed. You guess you could turn around and indulge your friends. You turned and it felt like your world ended.
Of all places...why here? Why at this time and place?
They danced as great as they always did. They sang with passion as they always did. They looked even more emotional than usual and when he turned his head towards your way while singing his lines, he caught your eyes. He didn’t falter even once as he locked his eyes on you. He continued dancing, those mesmerizing eyes piercing through your very soul. That sweet, velvety voice singing into the microphone, the sound of it ringing through your head.
God, you missed him.
You missed his voice, his face, the way his long fingers would push back his hair from his face. You missed his laughter, his smile, his eyes. You missed everything about him.
You turned back to Becca and Tori and took a deep breath. “I need some fresh air.”
They didn’t stop you as they continued to feel the music. You made your way towards the bar and asked for some water to hydrate your now dry throat. What will you say when they find you? What do you say when he talks to you? You shook your head and finished your water not noticing that the group finished their set and was replaced by another live band performing.
You turned to head towards the door to get a breather when you bumped into someone, spilling his drink all over the counter. “Oops! I’m so sorry!”
He turned to you and you saw that he was an Asian man of about five feet eleven inches and he seemed to have an air of sophistication on him. He raised his eyebrows when he saw you, his mouth opened slightly to speak.
Shit. Why Jeffrey of all people?
“It’s you! What are you doing here?” He asked in rapid Korean. “Do you know how much everyone has been asking about you?”
Oh no. What do you say?
“Hyung, there you are.” Another man approached him, his voice carefree and lighthearted. He looked at Jeffrey’s stunned face and then turned to you, his eyes going wide. “Oh! Noona! You were here all along?!”
Full Sun...
Fuck. You knew it. Once you saw one of them, you’ll end up seeing the rest of the guys. You turned away from them, leaving them stunned and a sputtering mess. “Sorry, I don’t know you!”
You pushed your way through the small crowd that gathered by the back door and went to an empty clearing. You needed to catch your breath. It’s been a year since you had seen anyone from the industry so why were they here of all places? Did they have a gig here somewhere in Chicago and decided to let loose or something?
You weren't paying attention as you bumped into something, rather someone, again. What the hell was wrong with you today? You were losing it. You had to be losing it. Seeing the group made you lose composure. 
Yeah, that was it.
“You okay?” A voice said from above you. That voice. That smooth velvety voice.
Johnny.
You couldn’t hide so you looked up at him with uncertainty in your eyes. “I’m fine... It’s been awhile, hasn’t it?”
A soft chuckle. “Yeah it’s been a year. How have you been, Y/N?”
Breathe in and out, Y/N. In and out. “It’s been dandy. Just living life one step at a time. How have you and the boys been, Johnny?”
A smile and the sound of his clothes shuffling about. From the corner of your eyes, you saw him lift his hand but placed it back at his side. “Oh, you know. The usual. Making new music, performing with the guys.”
“So why are you guys here? Randomly partying?” You asked out of curiosity.
He nodded, slicking his hair back. “Yeah. You? I couldn’t help but see a few old friends with you.”
You shrugged. “Apparently I was too cooped up in my room writing music. Tori dragged me out.”
“You're still writing music?” He asked. You gave him a small nod. “I'd like to hear it one day.”
“One day…” You muttered, your voice drowning out when you heard the voices.
“I swore I saw her, Mark.”
“You sure Jaehyun? Y/N has been avoiding all of us. She hasn't even been picking up Johnny’s calls.”
“I saw her too, Mark.”
“Even you Haechan? Wow, where was I at?”
You scanned his profile. Has things changed since the last time you saw him a year ago? He was still tall but he seemed to gain muscle. He hadn’t changed one bit. You let out a soft chuckle. “Jaehyun saw me first. Then Haechan. I ran away from them.”
“That sounds like you.” He chuckled. He bit his lower lip, probably thinking of what to say next. “Everyone misses you.”
But did you? You weren't about to ask him that though. “Yeah, I missed everyone too.”
“Y/N, I-” He started but was cut short when you shook your head.
“It's okay, Johnny.” You muttered, shaking your head. “You don’t need to say anything.”
Out of the blue, someone pushed you and you landed into Johnny’s outstretched arms. You pulled back almost instantly and he looked at you with sad eyes. If it was before your scandal and departure, you wouldn't have minded it. You would have thought he was joking or something like he normally did. Teased you, slightly pushed you away but… He didn't. His eyes held a certain sadness in them, as if he was telling you he was sorry for everything that happened, telling you that it was alright, telling you that he didn't mean those words.
You wanted to hear those words out loud. You wanted…
What did you want?
He reached out, cupping your cheek. “Y/N. I missed you.”
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A Year Ago
“But why noona?” Haechan asked.
The rumors and the hate you were getting about your scandal and departure from your ex-group was stressing you out that the new company you were with was having trouble trying to control the situation. You had come to visit one of your best friends in the industry, letting him and his group mates know that you were going on a hiatus indefinitely and that you were going back home to the States.
“Do you really have to go noona?” Jungwoo asked from the couch.
You nodded, your hand touching the scar you received a week ago on your neck. It wasn’t going to go away anytime soon. “Yes. I’m tired and I just want to go home.”
“But Y/N, how will we keep in contact?” Yuta asked, frowning next to Haechan.
“I'm always a phone call away.” You gave him a small smile. “You can always call me when you need to.”
“You’re going to be on the other side of the world.” Taeyong muttered, Doyoung nodding next to him. “It's going to be hard to contact you with our schedules and the time zone difference.”
“I know. I don’t want to do this but…” You trailed off and looked down at your feet.
“If you hadn’t gone to his house late at night, you wouldn’t be in this predicament.” Johnny muttered from his seat in the kitchen. 
Here it comes again. 
The fighting.
“And how was I supposed to know that some crazy paparazzi was going to be taking pictures?” You retaliated. This was not the first time that you and Johnny got into a heated argument about this topic. He felt so strongly about it and as much as you wanted to let it go, he always brought it back up. “He’s a friend. There was nothing going on between us.”
“Friend, my ass. You think the media thinks that? To them a female idol and a male idol are meeting in secret.” Johnny argued back, getting up to stride towards you. Sure he towered over you with his height, but there was no way you were going to be intimidated. “You really thought a girl like you could really be with someone like him? Dream on, Y/N. Get over yourself. He doesn’t love you.”
“I know he doesn’t! And I don’t like him in the romantic sense. Why are you being such an ass?” You glared up at him. You could tell the boys were getting concerned, Doyoung and Jungwoo backing away from whatever fist fight Johnny and you were going to put up. Jaehyun and Taeyong stood close by to step in if anything.
“I just wonder what’s going on with that thick skull of yours?! Of all guys, why him?” Johnny muttered out in English. For the past few times you've argued, it's been in English. He brought up his hand, as if to strike you, but clenched his fist and put it down. “If you wanted to date someone, you could’ve dated one of the guys. Yuta or Taeyong is a better choice than him!”
“Why do you always think I like him?! Why do you always jump to conclusions whenever I have guys as friends?” You retaliated back in English. “Why are you concerned about who I date and don't date?”
Johnny scoffed and threw his hands in the air. He gave you an incredulous look. “Who wouldn’t like him? He’s popular compared to NCT. You’d like to be the center of attention, don’t you? Especially after your group kicked you out.”
Center of attention?
Ouch. What a way to hit someone when they were down.
“Of all people, I thought you would be supportive of me Johnny! We go way back since our high school and college days and this is how you think of me?!” You shouted, the other members of NCT 127 backing away. You took a deep sigh out of frustration and looked him in the eyes. “Fine! I’m done.”
“What are you talking about Y/N?” Johnny shouted back, his hands grasping your shoulders.
“Yeah, it’s like you said Johnny. I like being the center of attention since I'm not the popular one in my ex-group. What else can I do when even my vocal trainer says I can't sing but you know for a fact that I could sing better than any of those girls? But you know what? I don’t need your permission or approval to do the things I want to do.” You shook yourself from his hands and stared at his angry face. You grabbed your things and headed towards the door. “I’m leaving Seoul. And I’m not coming back. Not for those girls, not for him… And especially not for you.”
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“Y/N, I missed you.”
What a liar. No he didn’t. He was the one who pushed you away first.
Johnny looked down at you, his eyes filled with sadness. Perhaps regret? You looked away, not wanting to get drowned in those eyes of his. And as much as you missed the man, you couldn’t forgive him for pushing you away like that. What he said was a hard blow. It even hurts to think about it. You hated to admit that you missed him, but after remembering what he said, you just couldn’t help but be mad and angry.
“Sure you did, Johnny.” You shrugged his hands off. You crossed your arms across your chest, and couldn’t help but notice that Johnny looked down at you. “I don’t have time to listen to your excuses. Now if you excuse me…”
“You’ve changed Y/N.” He muttered, running a hand through his hair. His eyes ran over your body, probably checking out your outfit.
“I’m still the same person.” You looked back at him. “You’re the one who’s changed.”
“I…”
“Is hyung hitting on a girl?” You heard a voice call out in Korean. From the corner of your eye, you saw the other members of NCT 127 make their way towards you both.
“Hush. Maybe she's an old friend of his.” Mark replied in Korean, as they stopped in front of you and Johnny. He took your profile in, his eyes scanning up and down, and if he noticed who you were, he didn't say anything.
“Hyung, are you making this pretty girl cry?” Jungwoo asked, giving you a concerned look. It was like he didn't recognize you because he started to speak in broken English. “Oh, is Johnny making you sad?” 
You giggled. That broken English of his was adorable. It made you want to protect him despite him being in his twenties. “I'm fine Jungwoo-ah. Your English is improving a lot. Speaking full sentences now!”
“She’s speaking Korean! Wait, she said my name. Do we know each other?” The man asked in Korean, as he looked at you, his face scrunched up. He had to remember you with the way his face lit up a few seconds later. “Oh! Y/N-noona!”
You nodded, a small smile lighting up your face. “Hi guys. It's good to see you again.”
“See? I told you we saw her, Mark.” Haechan frowned at Mark.
“Why'd you bolt out like that earlier?” Jaehyun asked seconds later. “Almost gave me and Haechan a heart attack.”
“I'm sorry.” You sighed and ran your fingers through your hair. “I had a little too much to drink and thought you two were going to do something perverted.”
“More like you'd do something perverted, Y/N.” Mark chuckled, coming forward to give you a small hug. “It's been a year. We all miss you.”
“I missed you too, Mark.” You returned his hug, hands coming to pat his back lightly. “But can you let go of me now? My friends are going to fight you if you hug me too long.”
“What friends?” Mark muttered as he pulled away from you. You pointed behind him and he turned around, noticing the two girls who stood a few feet away, both glaring at him and the other members. “Them? They look like they won’t hurt a fly.”
“You’d be surprised.” Johnny answered back, his members giving him a confused look.
You nodded, Tori and Becca coming to your side instantly. They linked their arms with yours and stared at Mark, the male backing away. Johnny couldn't help but chuckle. You let out a small smile. “Hey, you two. Sorry about that. I needed a breather.”
“Were these guys bothering you, Y/N?” Tori asked menacingly, looking over at each of the guys. 
“You're okay, right?” Becca looked you over, checking for any signs that you were hurt. She gestured to Mark. “That man over there didn't do anything inappropriate to you, did he?”
“Inappropriate?” Mark softly asked, Johnny stifling a laugh. 
The girls both spoke to you in English, with only Johnny, Mark and Jaehyun understanding everything. The other five probably understood, since they were English capable on command. When did you start speaking to them in Korean? Heck, when did you start speaking in Korean when it was just Johnny and you alone earlier?
You shook your head. “It's okay, girls. They're friends of mines from Korea. Plus, I think you know one of them already, although I don't know if you'll recognize him.”
“Why would we know idols?” Becca asked, eyeing the members. Yeah, she really didn't know the group.
“I'd like to refer to ourselves as musicians and artists.” Johnny responded, suddenly throwing an arm around you. “Right, Y/N?”
You looked at him and debated on whether you should fling his arm off but then thought better of it. You couldn't let your friends think that you were having drama with the guys despite what happened a year ago. “Uh huh. Sure, Johnny. The boys think of themselves as musicians and artists. Tori, Becca, meet NCT 127. Guys, meet my best friends, Tori and Becca.”
“Before you introduce yourself,” Tori said to Johnny and gestured to the other members behind us. “Do they all even know English?”
“Yeah! It’s one thing to speak and understand English and it’s another when you memorize just words.” Becca inputted.
“Of course, they understand. They’re English capable. Apart from Mark and Jaehyun…” You sighed and ran a hair through your dark hair. Johnny tucked a random piece of your hair behind your ear and looked down at you, nodding at your answer. You looked up at him and gestured with your chin, “…and this guy, the others understand. Introduce yourself already.”
“Geez, okay. Don’t have to be mean about it.” Johnny, with his arm still around you, let out a chuckle. He lazily waved at the other two girls, leaning his tall frame unto your short one. “Hey guys. It’s your boy Johnny. Hope you guys remember me.”
Tori bit her lip. “Johnny…”
“I don’t remember a Johnny...” Becca asked, her face scrunched up. “Wait…OH! The one dude that always followed after Y/N back in high school?” 
“I never followed after her.” Johnny grumbled. Despite the protest, you could tell he was enjoying the banter since his chest rumbled with laughter, ever so slightly. “She followed me.”
“Whatever, John Jun Suh.” You retorted, using his full name. You never used his full name unless it was to tease him or when you were mad with him. “You were following me, along with all the boys that were in my fan group. Goes to show that I was a beauty back in high school.”
Upon hearing the words coming from your lips, Johnny gave a side look, his eyes soft. His big smile turned into a small soft one. He replied in Korean, so Tori and Becca couldn’t hear. “You still are beautiful.” 
“Hyung.” Doyoung frowned, obviously catching what the second eldest member said. “Don’t be flirting with Y/N-noona like that. You know how she gets.”
“Johnny,” Taeyong started, eyes flickering back and forth between the two of you. It was clear that the boys would be speaking in Korean, since they wouldn’t want the girls to know what was going on. “I don’t think it’s a good idea for you to be casually flirting with Y/N.”
“Yeah, especially with what happened.” Jaehyun muttered, slightly concerned about how this was going to go down. Yuta nodded next to him.
“Are you guys dating?” Becca interrupted everyone as she pointed to you and Johnny. “Because you two look really friendly.”
Jaehyun responded with wide eyes but you shook your head, signaling that you had it under control.
“It’s okay, guys.” You smiled at them. Suddenly wrapping your arms around Johnny’s neck, you gazed up at him. “You owe me for this. And don’t think I forgive you too.”
And before Johnny could respond at the sudden act of you wrapping your arms around him, you stood on your toes and pressed your lips to his. 
Even you were surprised at your own actions.
What were you doing? Of all people, why is it Johnny Suh that you’re kissing?
Did you miss him that much that you just wanted to kiss him?
It couldn’t be. You and Johnny were friends. You’ve known each other for years and never once did he show any romantic interest in you or you in him.
You felt his strong arms coming to wrap around your lower back, his fingers lingering on the span of naked skin that was exposed from your clubbing outfit. You felt him tightening his hold on you, his soft lips slowly moving against yours, the deep breaths he took, the rise and fall of his chest. Your bodies were so close that you could feel his rapid heartbeat through the layers of his clothes and it made you wonder if he could feel yours.
You mentally scolded yourself, wondering why you were doing this. No, you shouldn’t have done it. You shouldn’t have kissed him just to have your friends think that you’re friendly with him. Or dating him. What will the boys think after? That you’re suddenly making a move on the eldest NCT member?
What would Johnny think?
Johnny rested his forehead against yours as you broke the kiss, trying to get his breathing back under control. His arms were still wrapped against your lower back, your own still around his neck. His eyes were closed, a small chuckle escaping from his lips. “Y/N…”
“Don’t.” You whispered, slightly shaking your head against his. “Don’t ruin the moment because it won’t happen again.”
He kept quiet, as if he was contemplating your words. He pulled his head back some, still holding on to you as he stared down at your face. “I─”
“We’ll leave you two lovebirds alone.” You heard Tori call out. Shit, you forgot about them. You glanced over to where she stood, her arms latched onto Yuta's right arm and Jaehyun’s left arm. The boys had confused expressions on their faces and looked at Johnny for some sort of guidance.
“Yeah, you two probably have a lot to catch up since it’s been a year since you last saw each other.” Becca nodded and you noticed that she too, had her arms latched onto Taeyong and Haechan. “So we’ll go back into the club with the guys.”
“You guys can drink, right?” Tori asked Jaehyun, who nodded in return. You watched as they walked into the club and you couldn’t help but stifle a chuckle when you saw the look on Mark’s face when he realized that he had to translate for everyone.
“Johnny-hyung!” Haechan called out, as Jaehyun shot you both a look. “Don’t do anything stupid!”
“What did he say?” Becca asked Mark, stopping momentarily as she nodded at Haechan. Mark shrugged in response as Becca just smiled and dragged the poor guys into the club.
“I miss that laugh and smile.” You heard Johnny mutter, still aware that his arms were settled on your lower back. He gave you a boyish grin and you couldn’t help but bite the inside of your cheeks before you let out a weird shriek. “So…can we talk about what’s going on between us?”
You shrugged yourself out of his grasp, moving away to put some distance between you both. Now this was awkward. Really awkward. You ran a hand through your hair and gestured to you both. “This kiss that happened between you and I, forget about it. It never happened.”
“Y/N.” Johnny started, coming to stand in front of you. “If you’re still mad about what happened a year ago─”
“I am!” You interrupted him and looked away. Did he not understand that what he said made you furious? “I’m still mad at you, Johnny. That fight, those words…I still remember it so clearly. I thought we were best friends and nothing could come between us, but I guessed wrong. What happened when we suddenly started fighting? What happened that made things take a wrong turn?”
“He happened.” Johnny muttered, looking down at the ground. “Ever since he came into the picture, things have changed between us. You started hanging out with him and his members more than you hung out with me and the rest of the guys. You’d blow off our plans to do other things with them.”
“You were mad because I had other friends?” You asked, with an airy sigh. “Johnny, you’re my best friend. Even if I made new friends, you’re the most important one. We grew up together.”
“Yeah. But people change Y/N.” Johnny said as he stepped in front of you and laid a hand on your arm. “You changed and I changed.”
You looked up at him and shrugged his hand off. “Because of him, huh? Because I was getting closer to him than anyone else.”
“He wasn’t good for you Y/N.” Johnny muttered as he returned the stare. “Anyone is better than him.”
“Like who?” You asked, watching as he averted his eyes. “The boys? You?”
“You know I’m only looking out for you.” Johnny replied back as he bit his lower lip. “You’re one of my best friends and I want what’s best for you. Taeil or Taeyong, heck even Jaehyun, was a better choice.”
Friends, huh? 
Why was that a slight blow? Did you want something more from him? Were you expecting something else from him? You just felt disappointed and you didn’t even know why.
You just wanted to hear something else. Something that showed that he saw you as a woman and not a friend.
Even something little.
“Don’t deny that you guys aren’t together.” Johnny said, as he stuffed his hands in his pocket, and blew his hair from his face. “I know you too damn well to know when you lie to me.”
“Even a year later, nothing escapes you huh?” You muttered, as you crossed your arms across your chest. “Things wouldn’t have turned out this way if I hadn’t gone to his place in the middle of the night and kept my legs closed.”
“Wait, what? You slept with him?” Johnny asked, his voice somehow getting a bit loud. The wrinkles started to form on his forehead as he furrowed his eyebrows. “Tell me you’re kidding.”
You bit your lip and shook your head. “I’m not kidding Johnny. We had sex a few times. I never told you because I know how you get.”
“Y/N─” Johnny started but you shook my head.
“See, you’re doing it again.” You interrupted him as he ran a hand through his hair. “Can we not fight again, Johnny? I’m getting tired of always fighting with my best friend.”
“I’m not going to argue with you or anything.” Johnny sighed as he crossed his arms. “I just wished you’d told me. Then I could have prevented it from happening.”
“Prevented what? Having sex with him?” He nodded in reply and you let out an exasperated sigh. “I’m a grown woman who has urges, Johnny. I don’t prevent you from having sex with other girls.”
“What other girls?” He asked, blinking a few times.
“Don’t play dumb with me.” You muttered. “What girl wouldn’t want to sleep with a handsome guy like you?”
“Oh?” He raised his eyebrows. “So that explains everything, huh?”
“Shut up.” You rolled your eyes. You were curious about why he never wanted you to date others. “Besides, I fell for his sweet stupid words and lies. Why don’t you want me dating other men? You can’t be jealous, can you?”
He turned away quickly and you caught a slight nod of his head. Just a slight nod. “Yeah, I get pretty jealous. It’s because…”
“Because…?” You cocked your head slightly, waiting for an answer.
“You’re my best friend.”
“Bullshit.”
“It’s because Jaehyun likes you.” He muttered, averting his gaze away. He looked over to the small crowd that gathered around the venue’s door. “That’s why.”
“Jaehyun?” You scoffed. You knew Jawhyun didn’t like you. “Yeah right. Jaehyun’s in love with himself. What’s the real reason?”
“Okay, okay!” Johnny turned back towards you and took a deep sigh, before pulling you into his arms. He took you by surprise as he tightened his hold. He rested his chin on your head so that you couldn’t see his face. But his heart was beating pretty fast. “After I tell you this, I’m not sure if we can go back to what we were before. But still I have to say this. I like you Y/N. I tried to hold it down but I can’t do it anymore. It took me a long time to say this…but I really, really like you. Fuck, I might even love you.”
“Wait. What?” Before you could even let out another sound, he silenced you with a kiss. It was different from the one you gave him earlier. His was soft and tender and you couldn’t help but revel in it. It was different from other kisses you’ve had with other men and...you can’t believe you’re actually saying it...but you really like it.
“Johnny, say it again.” You breathed out in between kisses.
“Please don’t make me say it again.” He muttered against your lips, resting his forehead against yours. Johnny cupped your face with one of his big palms, his thumb softly caressing your cheek.
You let out an oddly satisfying sigh. “Or you’ll do what?”
“Geezes, woman.” He chuckled lightly before pecking you softly on the lips again. “You drive me crazy.”
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Johnny wanted to hold hands in the club, but you weren’t quite ready yet. At least not mentally. Sure you both exchanged a couple more kisses here and there before making your way back into the venue. Sure your best friends thought that Johnny and you were a couple.
But you weren’t so sure about the boys. Hell, you don’t even know about your own damn feelings.
Were you a couple? Were you officially a thing?
Did you like Johnny like how he likes you? Or has it been so long since you felt the touch of another man, that your body is just yearning for him? Yeah, it had to be that. You had to be sexually frustrated to even think of sleeping with your best friend.
God, does he look good right now.
NO. NO. NO. NO. 
Y/N, stop it. You’re just a bit horny all because Johnny just kissed you.
Stop it.
You looked over at him as he conversed with Tori and Becca, no doubt catching up on old times. As if sensing that you were looking at him, he turned his head to look at you and sent you a smile that made you weak in the knees and momentarily short of breath.
“You okay there, Y/N?” He asked in Korean, swiping at the hair that fell into his eyes. “Are you tired? Do you want to rest for a bit?”
You shook my head. “I’m okay, Johnny. Where are the boys? I haven’t seen them since we got back into the club.”
“Jaehyun went to the bar with Doyoung.” Johnny pointed towards the bar where you saw the three members waiting on their drinks. “Jungwoo went to the restroom and Mark, Haechan, Taeyong and Yuta are dancing in the corner over there.”
“Does he really dance like that?” Tori asked as she watched Taeyong dance.
“Yep.” Johnny nodded. “He’s one of the main dancers.”
The boys came back to your cozy spot at the club and settled themselves comfortably in the lush seats. Although not as fluent in English as Johnny, Mark or Jaehyun, the boys conversed in English as they tried to get to know Tori and Becca better.
“Where are you guys staying?” You randomly asked Johnny as he fiddled with the beer bottle in his hand. He opened another one and handed it to you. “At a hotel?”
“Nah, I’m crashing back at home for the duration of our stay here. The boys are at a hotel.” Johnny chuckled as he pulled out his phone and showed a recent picture he took with his mom. “Mom is pretty happy that I’m back home for once. Oh yeah, are you staying with your parents?”
“No, I got my own place.” You replied, as you cooed over the picture, complimenting how cute his mom was. “Mom and Dad were pretty disappointed that I moved out.”
“Because you keep bringing guys over?” Johnny joked as he slid his phone back into his pocket.
“It’s because I don’t bring guys over.” You rolled your eyes and Johnny couldn’t help but laugh.
“But imagine the look on our parents' faces if they knew we hooked up.” Johnny chuckled as he took a drink of his beer. So you were just hooking up, huh? “My mom would make you move in ASAP.”
“Not unless my mom makes you move in her house instead.” You laughed as well. “They live down the street, so I don’t understand why they make such a big deal over it.”
Johnny leaned back in his seat and looked over at you. His eyes seemed to roam along your whole body and for once, you felt pretty self-conscious around him. “It must be nice to have your own place though. I share a room with Haechan in the dorms.”
“You’d think by now you’d have your own place with the way you are bringing girls home.” You raised your eyebrows teasingly at him. “Hey, I had a weird thought. Did you want to stop by my place maybe later tonight?”
“Holy shit, Y/N.” Johnny let out, his chest rumbling in laughter.
Shit.
Did you really just say that? Did you really invite Johnny to come back to your apartment later? What in the hell is wrong with you?
You looked towards the others and noticed that Tori and Becca talked about some random hottie they saw on the dance floor. The boys seemed distracted by a group of young men and women dancing in front of them, Taeyong debating if he wanted to join them. But the look Johnny gave you, made you curse myself.
“Yah, Y/N.” Johnny started in Korean as he scooted closer to you, his hand snaking around your waist and pulling you closer. “Are you inviting me over to your place to have fun?”
“Forget I said anything.” You rolled your eyes at him. “Who’d want to have fun with you?”
“Hey, you’re the one who said that girls can’t resist a handsome man like me.” Johnny chuckled as his fingers tapped against your naked midriff. “I’m handsome. I can dance. I have a deep voice for singing and rapping...”
“Dammit, Johnny.” You cursed aloud, the others looking your way. They raised their eyebrows before continuing their conversations and whatever the hell they were doing. “I hate you. I really hate you.”
Johnny moved his body even closer to yours and raised his eyebrows. “So onto a very touchy subject...How was sex with Hyunsik?”
Why did he bring that up? “It was okay, I guess.”
Im Hyunsik, one of BTOB’s vocalists and the father of majority of their music. The man you’ve slept with on numerous occasions. The man you had a scandal with. When was it that you started that forbidden relationship with Hyunsik?
Ah.
You were also promoting with the girl group you were in as well. You remembered after your performances, NCT 127 invited your group out for drinks but the other girls declined since they were quite a bit younger. 
You met the members of BTOB at the restaurant you went to and despite being attached to the members of NCT at the hip, the guys in BTOB seemed to attract your interest. And before you knew it, you started to hang out with them more and become friends with them. You vaguely remember Hyunsik asking you to meet up with him alone one time but how the relationship progressed from being just friends to friends who have sex with each other...you don’t remember at all.
“Oh?” Johnny raised his eyebrows. “Hm…. I would’ve thought that Im Hyunsik would’ve blown your mind. I mean he is a great vocalist and probably has lots of skills.”
“Yah. Keep your dirty thoughts to yourself, Johnny Suh.” You muttered, seemingly distracted by him. “And stop mentioning his name. It’s weird.”
“So then you don’t mind me asking…” Johnny smirked as he leaned his face closer to yours. “What do you think about us going to your place and just fuck?”
“What did you just say, Johnny?” You heard him wrong, right?
Johnny gave you a slight smirk, his long fingers touching, caressing, my naked midriff. You could see from the corner of your eyes that Tori and Becca were watching you both and if the boys saw it too, they probably ignored it. “You know what I said. Let’s go back to your place. Unleash the beast. Let this soldier have the spoils of war. Fuck.”
“Did you compare yourself as a soldier and me as the spoils of war?” You asked, scrunching your nose. You could care less about his vulgar language considering you used it pretty often, but did this guy really compare himself to a soldier?
“Did you like that? It was good, huh?” He asked, pretty proud of himself for coming up with that analogy. “Man, I’m a genius.”
“What a loser.” You rolled your eyes and looked at him. Just because he was being a tease, you thought you’d tease him back by running a finger down his chest. He took a sharp breath, his eyes wide. “But I’m down to let this soldier surround himself in his spoils of war.”
“Geezes, woman.” Johnny let out as he tried to control his breathing. “Were you like this with Hyunsik?”
“Yah,” you frowned and stopped. “Didn’t I say not to mention his name?”
He frowned as he grabbed hold of your finger. “Well, I don’t know what type of things you do with Hyunsik. Did you tease him like this too?”
You shook your head. “No. He did most of the teasing.”
His face lit up when you said that. He looked like a happy child at the candy store, surrounded by a whole bunch of sweets. “Ouuu~ So I get to experience sweet little Y/N’s teasing.”
“Go get a room, you two.” Tori called out, Becca nodding beside her. “We know you guys missed each other but come on.”
“Yeah. Go explore each other elsewhere.” Becca added, holding in her laugh. She turned to Tori, a big smile on her face. “I can’t believe today is the day we see Y/N with a guy.”
“And not even telling us about him, at all.” Tori shook her head in disappointment. “How could you not tell us that you had a boyfriend? Were you scared that we wouldn’t approve of Johnny?”
“I forgot to be honest.” You shrugged. You and Johnny were not a couple. You’d probably never be. At least you think so. “And you were always annoyed with Johnny back in high school. If I remember correctly, you kept getting annoyed with him whenever he signed up for the talent show.”
“Well this was before he started to sound so good!” Tori exclaimed, giving Johnny a sad frown. But it was only for a little while until her expression changed into that of a fangirl. 
“And before he started to look this good too.” Becca raised an eyebrow in appreciation. “Damn, what a glow-up. Y/N, you lucky bitch.”
“Stop giving him googly eyes, Becca.” You pinched her arm and she jumped in response. You gave her a small smile. “He’ll start getting a big head if you compliment him like that.”
Taeyong was sitting across from us, shaking his head in disapproval as the girls and Johnny laughed. He spoke in Korean, giving you and Johnny a frown. “Johnny, didn’t we tell you not to flirt with Y/N like that?”
“They haven’t seen each other in a year because of you-know-who and now they’re back to being normal.” Doyoung pouted.
Normal? Things did not get back to being normal, Doyoung. 
If anything, it took a weird turn. 
You had the biggest fight ever with Johnny a year ago, got reunited with him a few hours ago, kissed him like thirty minutes ago while he confessed to liking you, and now he wants to have sex with you. That’s normal? 
Oh, Kim Doyoung, you cute, innocent man.
“So noona and hyung are back to being friends?” Haechan asked as he shook his leg to the music.
Jungwoo shrugged. “I think so. Hyung, are you and noona back to being friends?”
Johnny looked at you, a mischievous smirk on his face. “Oh yeah. We’re back to being friends. Right, Y/N?”
That wink. Why did he have to do that? Be still your heart.
Johnny is just your best friend. Just your best friend of many, many years. A friend who is apparently attracted to you. Nothing more, nothing less… 
But what if…? No. 
You doubt Hyunsik will care about what you did or who you do. And if he does, you’d deal with that matter the next time you’re in Seoul.
If you ever return.
“Yeah, we’re back to being friends.” You nodded, not letting Johnny’s suggestive tone get to you. “Oh yeah. Do you guys want to go to my apartment so we can just chill and catch up?”
Johnny furrowed his eyebrows, when he heard you invite the others. 
Johnny Suh, I can not be alone with you anytime soon. You are apparently not good for my heart.
“It’s okay, Y/N. It’s kind of getting a bit late out so we’ll visit tomorrow if you don’t mind.” Taeyong smiled, the others agreeing.
“Johnny could walk you home though.” Mark nudged Johnny playfully. “Right?”
“Yeah. I don’t mind.” Johnny chuckled, glad that the boys were bailing.
Damn. 
You thought you could get away with it, but apparently not. You told the girls that you were going to head home and they happily saw you and Johnny off. It had taken you about maybe fifteen minutes to walk back to your apartment since you didn’t live that far from the club. You opened your door and let Johnny in, he took off his shoes and slowly padded into your territory.
Your somewhat empty territory.
“Yeah… Sorry it looks empty.” You muttered as you scratched the back of your head. Your living room barely had any furniture apart from the couch, a coffee table, the TV, and a keyboard on one side of the wall. Your kitchen only had the basics such as a microwave, a coffee pot, and a few pots and pans scattered around the counter. “I haven’t had the time or money to buy more things.”
“I hope you don’t sleep on the floor.” Johnny shook his head as he took in the condition of the apartment.
“Nah, my bedroom is the only place that has the most furniture.” You laughed as he plopped himself on the couch. “I spend most of my time there anyway. Writing lyrics, composing music, playing the guitar, and sleep.”
“You still playing the guitar?” Johnny asked, his eyebrows raised.
“Yeah. Just because I couldn’t when I was an idol doesn’t mean I stopped playing it.” You muttered as you sat next to him. “Now that I’m no longer in the group, I could write my own music and play the guitar all I want.”
“I want to hear one of your songs one day.” Johnny took your hand in his big ones and entwined your fingers together. “You’re amazing, you know that?”
“I know. You’re amazing too.” You smiled up at him, he returned an even bigger smile.
“I really am sorry, Y/N.” Johnny muttered as he brought his other hand to tuck your hair behind your ears. “If I had the chance to return back to that time, I would have told you how I felt, how I like you. You would’ve been mine and you wouldn’t have been in this predicament. You wouldn’t have this scandal staining your reputation. You could have been happy with me.”
“I get it. And I accept your apology.” You gave him a soft smile. “But what’s done is done, Johnny. We can only move forward.”
“Moving forward, huh?” He let out a small laugh before leaning his body closer to yours, his hands on my waist. “Let’s move forward together.”
He closed the distance between you both and sensually placed a trail of kisses down your collarbone. Oh God. You loved it when he did that.
“So I guess we should talk about the future then.” Johnny stated as he bit your neck softly, his teeth grazing your skin.
“Uh huh.” You hummed as he trailed kisses down your shoulder, nibbling on your skin gently. “The future.”
“I don’t want to put you in this difficult position.” He looked up at you, those warm brown eyes brightening up.
Difficult position? As in sexually frustrated?
As in sexually frustrated, wanting to devour you?
Whoops. Way to give him ideas.
But no, you wanted to move forward, make something real. Even if it was just a one night stand even though you wanted more.
“Then what do you want?” You smirked, knowing exactly where this was heading. The kiss became harder, the movements more passionate. You grind your hips against his as he moaned in pleasure, both of you breaking away for a second to catch your breath.
“What I want is you. For as long as I want. I don’t want to leave your side anymore.” His words sent chills down your spine, goosebumps appearing on your skin. “I want to spend every waking moment with you. Whether we’re in Korea or America. Even if it’s just eating meals together, walking through the park, working out, watching movies, singing karaoke, spending holidays with each other, I want to spend every single second of my life with you. All of you.”
Wait, hold up. What? “What did you say?”
“Everything I said.” He grinned, a dimple appearing on his left cheek. “All of it. Every word.”
“You’re crazy.” You whispered. You hadn’t expected him to say that. Of course, you had hoped that he liked you but that was taking it to another level.
“Am I?” He asked, cupping your cheek with his hand. “Tell me. Is that crazy?”
You’d never thought someone could love you that much. Someone who wasn’t family or a lover. But Johnny loves you that much. You’re loved by someone else other than yourself. By someone who also made you feel special. Loved. 
You squeezed his hand tight, loving the feeling of his rough thumb running circles over your palm. “No, Johnny. You’re not crazy. I’m speechless.”
His lips met yours again, his tongue pushing its way past your lips, teasing you. You parted your mouth, welcoming his tongue inside, caressing yours, dancing along them in perfect harmony. It felt like nothing you had ever experienced before, every touch, every kiss, every movement meant something, each syllable spoken and breathed into your ear created memories to last forever. It was as if nothing existed outside of this moment right now, this connection between the two of you.
You broke the kiss and rested your forehead against his, breathing heavily.
“You’re too good to me.” You muttered. “How am I supposed to reciprocate this?”
“What do you mean?” Johnny cocked his eyebrow, clearly not understanding your question.
“I don’t deserve you.” You admitted, tears starting to form in your eyes. “Not after what happened. Not after how I left.”
“Y/N…” Johnny pulled you closer, wrapping his arms around your waist. “Please don’t cry. I can’t handle seeing you sad. Don’t cry, baby. Please don’t cry.”
“Why are you doing this to me?” You cried as he held onto you tighter. "I should hate you for pushing me away. But I don't. I can't."
"I know I shouldn't have gotten mad." Johnny started. "For me to blame you was wrong. So fucking wrong. That was all me. I got jealous. I was insecure. I'm just a stupid man."
"Don't apologize." You sniffled. "Apologizing means you're admitting that you're at fault. You're not at fault, Johnny. This isn't your fault. None of this is your fault."
"Y/N…" Johnny sighed, wiping the tears from your cheeks. "I've always wanted to tell you this. That I love you. That I like you. That you have this effect on me. That whenever I'm around you, my entire world stops. That I could stare at you for hours without moving a muscle. That when you touch me, it's electrifying. That when you look at me, I can't help but fall in love. That I'm not a person, I'm a pile of melting ice cream when you look at me. That I become this jumbled mess when I think of you. When I think of us. You are everything. Everything to me."
"Me too, Johnny." You giggled as you kissed him again, you pushed him back on the couch so you could straddle his lap. You ran your hands through his messy locks, brushing his bangs out of his face. "When I think of you, I'm instantly happy. Everything else fades away. Nothing matters when I'm with you. My anxiety, my fears, my doubts, my insecurities… They all go away."
"And I need you, baby. So much. Like air." Johnny brought his hand up to cup your cheek, his thumb running along your jawline. "I don't want to be without you. I need you in my life, Y/N. I need you to fill that void in my heart. You're the only one for me."
"Johnny..." Your voice cracked as you tried to speak. Your heart was racing so fast, pounding so hard that you swore it would explode. Tears continued to fall from your eyes. "Are you sure?"
"Of course, baby." He chuckled. "Do you see anyone else sitting here besides you?"
"There's no one else but you." You mumbled, placing a gentle kiss on his lips. "Only you."
"Good. Because I'll never let you go." He murmured as his hand traveled down your stomach, towards your inner thighs.
You gasped loudly as he pressed a finger between your folds. "Oh god... Oh god, oh god, oh god."
"Ah, you like that?" Johnny teased as he lightly rubbed your clit with his middle finger. "Oh, you're so wet, Y/N. So hot."
"I need you. Now." You pleaded. "Right now, Johnny. Please."
"I'm not going anywhere." He whispered against your ear.
You don’t when or how, but both of you were suddenly naked. Your legs were trembling uncontrollably as he slid two fingers inside you, causing you to moan. You weren't even close to reaching climax yet, he had to stop. You needed him to slow down, prolong the pleasure until you could no longer bear it. Until your body couldn't take any more. You moaned louder, making him smile seductively.
"I bet you like this." He murmured, spreading your pussy open. "Wanting it, craving it. Telling me that you need me, that you want me. Don't deny it. Let go, baby. Let me take control. You won't regret it."
You nodded silently, closing your eyes. You felt his lips brush against your neck, your breasts, your abdomen. He traced little hearts all across your body with his tongue. Each touch, each lick, each kiss had you gasping in pleasure. One more minute and you'd come undone, panting as you writhed against his hand. "Johnny, please..."
"That's it, baby. Come for me." Johnny whispered as he continued to rub your clit. "Come on. Cum for me. Let go. Give me everything."
It was torture. You knew that once you came, he'd stop. And you didn't want that. It was bad enough that he had put you in this situation, why did he have to ruin it by stopping? You reached down and grasped his wrist, pulling his fingers away from you. He didn't resist, merely watched as you quickly brought your lips to his hand, sucking on his fingers. You hummed as his fingers touched your tongue, tasting yourself, tasting him. You moved his fingers back to your sex, licking them clean before pushing them inside you.
"Ah fuck." Johnny groaned as he watched you do whatever you pleased with his fingers. "You're killing me, baby."
"Sorry." You hummed, kissing his fingers once more before replacing them inside you. "But I really want to cum. I need to cum."
"You're damn right you need to come." Johnny growled, bringing his other hand up to cup your breast. "You've been denied for far too long. Just thinking about it has me horny as hell."
He slowly pulled his fingers out of you, leaving you empty and unsatisfied. You whimpered as he placed his fingers back in your mouth, letting you suckle on them once more. He wrapped his arms around you, pressing your body flush against his. "God, I need to be inside you."
"Please." You panted.
"Where, baby?" Johnny questioned, his fingers tracing patterns across your stomach. "Should I go deep or shallow? Should I use my fingers or just shove my cock inside you?"
You shivered, his words making your body quiver with excitement. "Shove your cock in me, Johnny. Please."
He grinned, opening your legs wide, his erection bobbing in front of your face. "I'm going to fuck you so hard, Y/N." He whispered, lightly running his thumb over your nipple. "So very hard."
You grabbed onto his shoulders, clinging onto him as he positioned himself between your legs. He pressed forward, his length rubbing against your slit, causing you to squirm and moan.
"Yes, baby. So beautiful." Johnny mumbled, lowering himself so that the head of his cock brushed against your entrance. "I want to slide inside you so badly."
"Please." You whined, biting down on your lip as he pushed forward slightly. The head of his cock slipped inside you, stretching you gently. His shaft pushed against the walls of your vagina, forcing you to widen your legs slightly. You arched your back as he penetrated you deeper, sighing as he filled you completely. "Oh god... You're so big, Johnny."
"Damn, you feel amazing." Johnny groaned as he began to thrust inside you.
"Goddamn, you feel amazing." Johnny echoed as he continued to thrust in and out of you.
You clung onto his shoulders, rocking your hips back and forth, meeting his thrusts perfectly. Each thrust caused you to moan louder, your body begging for more. "Fuck, Johnny. Please fuck me harder. Harder, faster."
"Give me everything, baby." Johnny panted as he fucked you hard. "All of you. Cum for me."
You gave him everything. Every bit of yourself. Giving in to his demands, accepting his commands, doing whatever he asked of you. Doing anything he told you to. All because he made you feel so fucking amazing. As you exploded around him, your orgasm pulsating within your womb, you came apart in his arms, screaming his name over and over again.
“Fuck! Johnny!”
"Oh god, baby." Johnny whispered as he slowed his thrusts. "I've never felt anything like that before. I'm cumming."
You closed your eyes, enjoying the sensation. You wrapped your arms around his neck, locking your legs around his waist, grinding against him as he shot his load inside you. He collapsed against you, both of you catching your breath.
"Holy shit, that was intense." You laughed, kissing him on the lips. "I haven't cum like that in like a year."
"Fucking hell, Y/N." Johnny cursed, wiping sweat off his brow. "You took my breath away."
"You did that to me." You laughed, grinning as you snuggled into his chest. "Let's go to bed. My bedroom is right over there."
"Yeah." Johnny smiled. "Bed sounds great."
"So does being in your arms." You smiled as you leaned in to kiss him.
"It doesn't get much better than this, Y/N." Johnny said softly, placing a gentle kiss on your forehead.
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You woke up to the sound of your phone ringing on the bedside table next to you. Slowly getting up, you rubbed your eyes, the sunlight glaring through the curtains. You picked up your phone and looked at the screen, groaning when you saw Mark's name lighting up.
Pressing the green icon on your phone screen, you pressed the cellular device against your ear.
“Ugh, it’s so early, Mark. What do you want?” You muttered out, the blankets pooling around your waist. Your skin was sticky from the aftermath of whatever occurred during the previous night.
“Good morning to you too, sleeping beauty. Johnny over there?”
“Mmhmm. Why?” You let out, a muscular arm reaching out from the covers to squeeze your hip. You slapped his hand away, prompting him to peek his head out from the sheets to frown at you.
“He ain't answering his phone. Plus his mom keeps calling us.”
 “What did you tell her?”
“We said something about him meeting up with old friends and spending the night there or something.” You heard him mutter from the other side. There were groans from the distance and someone muttering about coffee, so you assumed the boys were all getting up from their sleep. “Just call his mom and let her know that you finally slept with her precious son.”
“Yah. Why do I have to be the one to tell his mom that we finally fucked?” You asked, looking at the man next to you, a mischievous smile on his face.
“Because you’re close to his parents. I mean your parents and his parents are friends right?”
“Yeah… But I don’t want to tell Johnny's mom that we had sex.” You groaned out, Johnny chuckling softly next to you. “It’s just so weird. Johnny's mom would probably tell my mom. And then my mom would probably tell me to lock Johnny down...”
“Well...not my problem! Have fun!”
“Yah! Mark Lee! Mark! He hung up.” You frowned when you noticed he disconnected the call. Shaking your head and leaving the warmth of your bed and Johnny's arms, you grabbed the closest towel you could find. You went to the other side of the bed and shook the muscular figure. “Johnny, stop pretending to be asleep. Go call your mom.”
“And tell my mom that we had wild, passionate sex?” Johnny grinned, suggestively raising one eyebrow.
“Nevermind. Don’t.” You shook your head. “I don’t want your mom to suddenly be treating me differently just because I took her son’s virginity.”
“I was not a virgin and you know it.” Johnny pouted. “Otherwise, you wouldn’t have been screaming my name so loudly last night.”
“I hate you Johnny Suh.” You replied back, your cheeks suddenly turning pink. You had to admit...he was good in bed.
“Mmhmm, I know. Are you going to shower?” Johnny muttered against the bedsheets, his eyes soft. You nodded. “Want me to join you?”
“If you did that, we’d never leave my apartment.” You chuckled as you gave him a quick kiss on the cheek. You moved towards the bathroom and gave him a small smile. “Can you start the coffee while I grab the shower first?”
“Why don’t we just shower together?” Johnny muttered as he sat up in bed, scratching his bare chest. “It’ll save us time.”
“You make a good point…” You scrunch your nose and then shake your head. “But no. Knowing you, we’ll be doing other things than shower.”
“Damn. It was worth a try.” Johnny mumbled under his breath as you chuckled and retreated to the bathroom. Swinging his feet out of bed and shrugging on his jeans, he made his way towards the kitchen to start up the coffee maker. He looked towards the bathroom, noticing that the door was wide open. “How do you like your coffee!?”
“Black please!” You called out through the bathroom door, the sound of the shower running.
Johnny chuckled, walking away from the coffee maker as it continued brewing. He went into the bathroom and leaned against the doorframe, eyebrows raised as he made out your silhouette behind the shower curtains. “You sure you don’t want it sweet and creamy like me?”
“You’re so weird Johnny.” You peeked out from the curtains and made a face. You nodded towards the shower. “But since you were being such a cutie by making coffee, you might as well join me.”
“Score!” He called out, discarding whatever clothing he had on and joined you in the shower.
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