#( enjoy ur stay at trauma-city )

[thewildsorcerer]

(( hello friend! :> ))

"Whatcha got there?"

first meeting starters

Caspian was hiding off from the beach members and their extensive partying. He could handle the loudness.. but the people. So many humans. He was missing his home, so he was currently sitting criss cross in a garden area hiding away as he scribbled away into a book. Jumping slightly, he looked up to see a girl with red hair standing over him. He shut the book, pausing for a moment. How should he respond? Why did she even need to know? His mind immediately went into fight mode and he wished his brother was here to calm him down. “ Why do you need to know? “ he asked, voicing the second question that was in his head

[roobylavender]

Faatima, pardon me if you’ve already posted/been asked this before, and I know you’ve already answer this in part when talking to me before, but I’d love to hear what ur top fave Pakistani dramas are, with as much or as little detail as you’d like! 🩷🫶🏽📜

i don't think i've ever gone into detail with specific recs so this is a good opportunity to do so omg ty hiba 🥺

daam (2010) - two women from starkly different class backgrounds are friends and attend medical school together. maleeha (upper class) takes on an almost paternalistic role with zara (lower class) by handing her down clothes, incorporating her into her friend group, etc., despite zara's own self sufficiency outside of her financial situation. the role maleeha plays in zara's life is one zara is eternally grateful for, but maleeha never seems to move past a recognition of her own self-importance. so much so, that when maleeha learns zara may have feelings for her brother, junaid, she feels used and threatens to revoke all of the assistance she has been giving zara's family for years. it's a hard-hitting exploration into the impact of class stratification on friendship and the inherent biases that color upper class pakistanis' interactions with lower class pakistanis. and i enjoy the realism of forgiving people for their transgressions but not necessarily moving backwards in time to reforge the bonds you once used to have (no eng sub)

jackson heights (2014) - an ensemble focused drama set in jackson heights, new york. it's a wonderfully vivid depiction of a variety of working class pakistanis and one that manages to remain down to earth while nonetheless highlighting hard hitting issues, particularly emotional, financial, and physical abuse. it's hard to describe but one thing the drama does really well is not valorize its abuse victims. they aren't saints for riding out the horrors of the violence enacted against them. they're only people moving through the world like anyone else. there was a tendency in pakistani dramas of this era to dramatize the idolization of the west via the lens of unattainable romance, but this drama is far more successful in portraying the realities you have to come to terms with when you uproot yourself from your homeland and start from scratch and work a menial job. in that sense i think it's a triggering drama in a lot of ways, but never gratuitous, and very thoughtful as to its themes and conclusions (no eng sub)

raqeeb se (2021) - this play is very cryptic in a lot of ways (standard fare for screenwriter bee gul) but it does a great job at adhering to realities without necessarily fetishizing them. the storyline focuses exclusively on the intergenerational trauma of two pairs of women connected by one man. maqsood is from a gaon and once tried to run away with sakina, only for someone else to be killed in the process. as a result, sakina had to stay behind and raised a daughter ameera with an abusive husband, while maqsood was married to hajra and moved to the city where they had their daughter insha. years later sakina flees from her husband's abuse and takes her daughter to the only place she knows: maqsood's. but what's interesting about this setup is that maqsood and sakina's love story is so well known in the former's household that maqsood's wife hajra bears sakina and her daughter no ill will. she takes them in, cares for them, and shoulders their grief, all while her daughter insha watches in bewilderment. it's an incredibly captivating story in the face of so many others that would rather use love and men to sew seeds of revenge and malice between women. ultimately, ameera and insha are used to explore how women can forge their own histories and choices despite the duties and blame their mothers were bounded to by tradition (no eng sub)

sar e rah (2023) - most pak dramas in the past decade have been unforgivably long (a below-thirty episode run is unheard of now even though we used to wrap up stories in little more than twenty episodes pre-2014ish) but we're slowly seeing the rise of the miniseries, and this drama is a stellar recent example. each episode centers on a different character struggling with a societal issue. rania takes over her father's taxi driving business when he gets sick despite concerns that it is no job for a woman. dr. muzna adopts a child but subsequently deals with her husband's rejection bc he sees it as an exposure of his impotence that he has not divulged to his own mother. rameen faces familial accusations of shamelessness bc she is a tik tok star and fights to maintain her right to an inheritance when her brother seeks to disown her. sarim is a trans man brought up with love and acceptance from his father but rejection and bigotry from his step mother and step brother. and maryam is a working woman forced to take a stand for herself when constantly underestimated and even falsely accused due to workplace misogyny. it's altogether not a perfect but nonetheless significantly forward thinking drama despite societal standards, and saba qamar (rania) connects all of these characters together masterfully in a major call to action (full eng sub)

dil na umeed to hani (2021) - the central focus of this drama is human trafficking and child labor. allah rakhi and jamshed are childhood friends from the same village who are quickly made to part ways due to extenuating circumstances. allah rakhi is married off to an older man who sells her into prostitution, while jamshed runs away from home after suffering abuse from the adults in his life. the drama mainly follows both characters in their adult years, when allah rakhi finally attempts to escape the prison of the brothel, while jamshed works at a shelter for sex trafficking victims. there's also another younger character, naseem, who dreams of becoming a national women's cricketer despite being faced with her father's misogyny and the threat of human trafficking herself. this is overall an incredibly raw and painful story so novel in its attempt to highlight certain societal issues that it was nearly banned from broadcast in the country. yumna zaidi and wahaj ali are breathtaking in roles that are essentially the culmination of all of their years of hard work on more niche indie projects, and their characters' reunion towards the end of the drama will send any viewer into tears (partially eng sub)

these are probably the most well-rounded dramas that i feel really proud of recommending. while romance is a present element in some of them it's never the central element and i don't feel unnecessarily harsh in saying that our portrayals of romance still have a really long way to go to the point that i wouldn't necessarily rec any drama where romance was the focus lmao.. like i have my guilty pleasures (i rewatch humsafar often for mahira khan and fawad khan's chemistry alone despite its severe issues) but they're mostly me being willing to indulge in garbage for the sake of a) an actor's skill; b) a lead couple's chemistry; or c) a female character whom i would protect with my life despite her being trapped in the shittiest narrative imaginable

that being said, some other dramas i have also enjoyed over the years:

kuch ankahi (ongoing) -> great ensemble cast and exploration of several issues with a balance of comedy and subtlety. sajal aly and bilal abbas khan are also phenomenal in the lead roles and probably share the best on-screen chemistry of any of their peers at the moment

yunhi (ongoing) -> the set-up is a bit cringe, but the ideas it's ultimately exploring about hypocritical perceptions both diaspora and homeland pakistanis have of each other is really interesting and the tone of the drama is very calm and down to earth rather than overly dramatic or melancholic

fairy tale (2023) -> this is the only ramadan drama i'm going to put on here lmao but it's recently gone viral bc frankly despite all of its flaws (not owing to any weird societal views, only investment in plot points and side characters who are frankly uninteresting) the chemistry and comedic timing between the two leads is genuinely insane. it's a bit cliched from time to time but they really do have me smiling silly every day even though the drama's over like look at them look at them look at theeeeem

chauraha (2022) -> it's very common in pakistani media that a girl is either kidnapped or stockholm syndromed into loving a man so i really love this one bc it shows a girl get kidnapped and refuse to romanticize the situation while also remaining adamant as to her own independence rather than allowing societal pressure to force her into marrying someone to save her image

jo bichar gaye (2022) -> period drama about the events that set the stage for bangladesh's separation from pakistan. largely applauded for not romanticizing or skirting over pakistan's transgressions in alienating and harming east pakistanis/bangladeshis

dastaan (2010) -> period drama about a woman's experience before, during, and after partition. noted for its commentary on women in this era and how they faced resounding sexual violence, whether from hindu, sikh, or muslim men

o rangreza (2019) -> the pak drama version of that one essay excerpt about how the daughter ridicules her mother by establishing camaraderie with her father. a really interesting insight into how pakistani daughters can sometimes be so disgusted with their mothers' culturally curated subservience that their attempts to gain independence are also built on internalized misogyny

durr e shehwar (2012) -> a bit of a dated drama in that it recounts the experience of a woman through the early years of her marriage and the patience it took for her to win over her husband and his family. i'm sure there would be complaints now about how this drama romanticized that patience despite all of the pain and isolation the female lead suffered but i also think it's largely cathartic bc it doesn't chastise women in similar circumstances

badshah begum (2022) -> is this drama good? no. does it have anything productive to say about mob mentality and tribalism in rural pakistani villages? no. are any of the female characters truly independent and strong in the best sense of the word? maybe only one. but the ost is a banger and the performances by everyone are genuinely phenomenal so i'm putting it here anyway lmao

yaqeen ka safar (2017) -> this drama shot sajal aly and ahad raza mir to superstardom and marriage which has now unfortunately ended in divorce. but at the time their chemistry was phenomenal so while i have nitpicky issues with the plot i do enjoy the drama for the development of their relationship alone like it was pretty sweet

humsafar (2011) -> obv i said above that it's garbage and i stand by that but the chemistry between the leads here really was unprecedented for its time and has remained largely unrivaled in the industry. i also am able to rewatch for mahira khan's portrayal of khirad alone and some of the dialogues are so [clenches fist]

zindagi gulzar hai (2012) -> another super flawed drama but i really enjoy the portrayal of a female lead who struggles with coming around to the idea of marriage and baring herself to someone else bc of the trauma of growing up with a severely neglectful father. it's just real to see a girl freak out about her agency and about admitting to feelings she may have bc she is terrified at the thought of being vulnerable and weak. like that's literally me

[angelmichelangelo]

Hihi I’ve been scrolling through ur blog a little and I absolutely love your writing + opinions <3 for the five minute prompts if you’re still doing them: “Make it stop”?? (if it’s cool I make a preference: Rasey or general??? Otherwise don’t worry about it, do what you’re doing :])

oh my goodness that is so kind of you! thank you !! <3 hope you enjoy this lil ficcy!

--

“Make it stop, make it—”

Raph hisses, twisting out of his hold, squirming like his skin was on fire, and when Casey’s hands tremble over his body, barely touching against green, scaly skin, he feels as if he could be on fire, the heat rolls off of him and he has to bite back a burning threat of tears as he cradles the turtle in his hold, unsure of what to do.

The city explodes, dark sky flashes with a ferocious orange and there’s the staticy pop of his comms device trying to come back to life again.

There’s also the broken sound of April’s voice filtering through, barking out an order that Casey’s choosing to ignore. The blown out building that they’ve found themselves in rains down more dust as the air shakes and trembles in the aftershocks of whatever bomb had been set off just a few blocks away.

“I know,” Casey tells him, voice failing him, buckling heavily with emotion. Raph’s eyes are squeezed shut, so tight his face screws itself into a ball. There’s a gash sliced right across his face, deep and leaking crimson, Raph chokes back a sob and tries to escape Casey’s clutch again.

“Hold on,” Casey calls to him, voice warbling with uncertainty. The air shifts again, another explosion of light and noise that fills the fallen city. April is screaming at him again, something about falling back. Something about retreat that makes his gut squirm.

“Make it stop, Case, god please just make it all stop.”

And he knows he’s delirious with pain, with shock, with a boatload of trauma but he wishes he could fulfill his wish and just snap his fingers and make everything around them just disappear.

But other than hoping and wishing, he isn’t sure what to do. Raph is close to a hundred pound of pure mutant turtle. Casey is only a man. He could try lifting him but he knows it’ll be futile.

And maybe he’s destined to stay behind with Raph, turn himself into ash and stone, cradling his form for anyone past this war to find, to study, to purposely misunderstand and his breath catches in his throat when tears leak from the corners of Raph’s eyes and his hand is being crushed by three larger fingers that wrap around his. And then in an instance, there’s Mikey, having appeared within a fraction of a second, and Casey is sure he coughs up a small, weak laugh, thinking something like ha, Angel-o, get it, because the other younger turtle is looking at his barely conscious brother and his face is creased with determination and he’s yanking Casey up with just one arm, forcing him to his feet and Raph makes a swipe for him but Mikey’s filling the space between them both and somehow he’s able to do what Casey wasn’t and he’s hauling him over his shoulder, breath heavy and ragged as he steadies himself with the newfound weight against his. “Casey, go,” Mikey barks at him. Casey does go instead, moving through the smokey air everything feels warm and heavy on top of him and his eyes burn as he listens to the sound of Raph filtering between awake and being asleep. “Make it stop,” his words slur together. “Please. Make it stop.” The war carries on without them once they’ve hauled ass into the back of their van and as soon as Casey is out on his ass, both April and Mikey are chewing them out about suicide missions and being reckless, just as Mikey is tending to Raph’s face, pressing a cloth that soaks red, his lips are pressed together with unspoken hurt and all Casey can do is sit and watch as April wordlessly drives them back to their lair. It’s just them, their group having thinned out tremendously over the years but it doesn’t stop Casey from finding Raph’s room later that night, brushing his thumb over where the edge of the bandage that’s wrapped around his face, pressing his kiss to his snout. “It’ll stop,” Casey whispers to him. He knows he’s sleeping, body heavy with the drugs that Mikey had jabbed into his once they’d gotten home. “One day. It’ll stop.” And he can only hope it will.

[mirohtron]

HEY GIRL

Watched / read anything good recently?

was watching dungeon meshi but then that gay ahh bath scene came on and my moms in the room w me so like 💀💀💀💀 reading 1984 rn bcs assignment, im ten pages in bcs i keep fawking playing honkai star rail 😭😭😭 omg, but i was in the midst of watching dil se before i realised i was getting distracted too easily and it was keeping me from enjoying it properly. was only watching it bcs i couldnt find bombay (1995, not the city 💀💀) anywhere. probs bcs nobody gaf abt archiving desi movies 😭😭😭😭 its tough out here, but like for dil se honestly i rlly liked the screenplay and the way it was directed even tho like . i literally only got to the first song of the film 💀💀 even then. also oh my god srk has not a SINGLE dancing bone in his body like ive bitched abt it before but oml hrithik roshan and tiger shroff are actually carrying the reputation of bollywood's male actor's dancing abilities on their back....now if only theyd stop FAWKING taking up propaganda films 😭😭😭

i actually kinda need to leave a separate paragraph for how bad srk dances like its not just when he was young...in chaiyya chaiyya literally EVERYBODY is on beat except him....and it KEELS me because ure telling me u cant keep tempo ??? brother 😭😭😭😭😭 but ok even in the present like, he stays on beat (barely) but hes SO STIFF?? i like saw some clip of him dancing with an actress, it mightve been deepika padukone in happy new year ??? oh my god it was SO bad. he was SO stiff. it KILLED me. bollywood actress go through HELL but sanjay dutt srk and a bunch of other male actors get away with not being able to dance well 😭😭😭😭 my queen kareena kapoor took dance classes before filming k3g yet srk and amitabh bacchan got away w shava shava....Sick and Twisted world we live in like....anyway i actually dk if thalapthy vijay is a bhakt but this is y he solos even tho i have verithanam trauma....sings n dances well etc, this is y bollywood flops consistently actually

pls take that paragraph lightheartedly if ure desi 💔 ok anyway

the god of small things by arundhati roy is good....i only read like 20 pages tho but ik plot 💀💀💀💀 i think the seven moons of maali almeida might also b good, its by shehan karunatilaka

ok last unfinished thing im gna recommend....Hot Tkae but....i liked saltburn...i still have the 2nd half of the movie to finish (stopped some time after the reveal) but again, ik the plot 😭 i still have some problems w it tho but its not rlly abt the hypersexuality. cinematography fucked. 4:3 aspect ratio choice? ATE. SO BADD. but ill also need to finish the film. but tbh its obsessed boy x rich boy trope wasnt rlly handled well in my opinion, micah nemerever's these violent delights solos in that area. and i think the story is flawed

ok NOW. i liked fleabag. actually i LOVED fleabag. think its a masterpiece. both seasons but esp the 2nd one (felt more refined but compared to other shows, s1 SOLOS). the boys s4 is dropping!! invincible s2 was alr i bet the animation studio suffered hard tho bcs wtf was that style change mid season 😭😭😭. and i don't rlly think the direction in which Nolan's character arc is gna go to will turn out that great? also, i loved gerta gerwig's ladybug! its actually crazy how she made ladybug and barbie both . one is amazing. the other is well uhm.

oh also i liked inglourious basterds and pulp fiction . quentin tarantino kinda looks like a walking talking serial killer mugshot tho i saw an interview where he was asked why kill bill had so much violence and was honestly surprised by how girlypop he was. not forgetting him choking diane kruger on set tho !

watched batman begins. it was aight 😭 rewatched matt reeves' batman right after. liked it betterr. i LOVEDDD heartbreak high, s1 and s2 !! usually with shows i only like s1 best, but w heartbreak high i literally ADOREDDD s2, the finale was so good !!! im also watching the gentlemen (the show) rn, and i rllyyy like it hehe. tried watching tick tick boom again bcs I'd actually dropped it midway when it had first released bcs that one scene where she was like "you're thinking of a song rn aren't you" was so stress inducing that I had 2 click away 💀💀 n then i forgot abt it. picked it up again and omg it's actually so good how did I miss it the first time 😭😭😭

oh yeah I also liked the fall of the house of usher . also ! another incompleted thing but im also in the midst of watching the three of us (film). its so good !! i loved the atmosphere and cast performances can't wait 2 see how it turns out :))

[riveralongher]

I miss you

Oct 17 2024 4:41PM

I miss you so much, there’s not a day that goes by where I don’t think of you and I hate myself for it, I shouldn’t be missing someone I broke down and hurt completely to their core, but I do anyways. I saw you several times since we last spoke and it’s strange to me why I keep seeing you, I understand we live in a small city with everyone knowing everyone but I never thought I’d drive to Corpus Christi one day and find you there, it was strange to me why you were there my only guess was you were going to the show I was going to as well but when it came down to it, you weren’t there at all, it was so strange to me why I saw you there out of all the days I could of went or you could of went you happen to be there right when I was there why? And to come back home and the next day see you again later at a mall, when I got home that day after seeing you I cried and broke down to my mom about how you looked, you looked so different, your hair was shorter, ur eyes looked dead, your body looked starved and ur face was sharper, I blame your boyfriend for everything but I also blame myself for it as well.. you told me one day that you wanted to call me and ask me to go pick you up from your boyfriends place because you were tripping out off the drugs he gave you, that alone fired a spark in me that makes me want to physically harm him to the brink of death and break every bone in his body, I’m not sure why I’m getting so defensive over you when your not mine anymore, I’m not sure why I even still think of you anymore because I made mistakes and there should be no reason for me to care about you. But like I said before and many times to you, I’d always protect you and I guess that comment alone has stuck to me forever. A few weeks ago a girl who never had any meaning in my life tried to ruin my good terms with you because I’d stop driving her everywhere she wanted me to take her, I never liked her like that or even cared about her, I was just bored and needed a friend to talk to and at the time she was a stranger to me I felt I can trauma dump on her and then leave when I felt better, but it turns out she liked me and enjoyed doing things with me which is why when I blocked her and stopped talking to her she turned things around and tried to ruin my life. Spreading insane rumors that I go out of my way to stalk your home and that I cheated on you with multiple women is ridiculous to the sound, but of course you believed it and that flame of hatred you had for me sparked up and now you never wanna look at me the same anymore, it got so bad you even told your boyfriend about it and he wanted to do something about it, I’m so sorry but, your boyfriend wouldn’t have survived hand to hand with me which is why I decided to call things off and you know alone that him trying to rough things out with me would of ended in two ways at which you don’t wanna hear in detail but to shorten them out , one would be me in prison for murder and two would have put you hating me more that he’s in the hospital resulting in both making you hate me more than you already do. After we broke up I stayed single for the longest time trying to regain my sanity and peace and trying to find myself again I didn’t wanna jump into any relationship because I know that I’d only compare them to you and it would make things worst for me, I’m not sure why you jumped into one immediately after we broke up it leads me to believe I never meant anything to you at all or that he’s been up ur sleeve for the longest time, but anyways that’s not the point of this conversation what I’m writing here today is that I miss you so much and that’s all I wanna say.

[otgwbgyu]

ig i should start doing full entries again esp bc school’s starting and ill probably being feeling way worse

in chicago like THE big city today. and for the next couple of days. trying to enjoy vacation but summer reading haunts me everywhere i go. it’s so unfair that we have to do school work during the summer. like i’m not gonna become illiterate over the summer…. chill…. but it’s just something i can’t shake and will always worry abt. like during the game i started listening to the audiobook bc i got so anxious over it 💀 ik it’s kinda on me for not reading earlier but like…. the books r mid NOBODY actually wants to read a how-to on reading 😕😕 i do get random bursts of motivation tho when i fantasize abt being a productive, straight-a honors student with a national merit scholarship like my dad, and i also kinda get competitive with my friends. bad for r relationship but good for my grades and sanity for sure

i kinda snapped yesterday too lmao. like i joined call w sarah and she was being so uninterested and unresponsive while begging others to join call and the minute ava joins she’s all happy and conversing. like damn ok?? u can be closer w others but presenting it like that hurts lmfaoo. after 5 min I left bc i just wasn’t having it tbh. it rlly stung and pissed me off

o yeah i finally finished catcher in the rye OMGG… i honestly dunno how to feel about that book. like i get holden but at the same time i dont?? i can be angsty like him but he’s like my angst on steroids. that guy cant find any enjoyment anywhere he goes and it pisses me off. i may seem grouchy and miserable on here but im more friendly irl. remember this is primarily a VENT acc where all my dark thoughts go, the main ones aka the happy ones stay in my head or get shared with others. and hes so pessimistic, not like MY type of pessimistic where i think everything’s gonna fail or go wrong, pessimistic as in everything sucks and theres nothing to enjoy in life. like omg aren’t u just a bundle of sunshine!

i feel bad bc he is just a kid and has trauma, but that doesn’t give him the right to make others miserable. like humanity sucks yeah but u gotta learn to deal w it man. ur not gonna like everyone and not everyone’s gonna like u, it’s just something u gotta live through bc at the end of the day there’s a good bunch of ppl who do care abt u, and that love, even divided, should matter more to u than the hate others feel towards u. bc why r u concerned abt strangers’ hatred and not your own family and friends’ love? but he’s a teen whose mind is clouded by depression and angst, so i can’t be too harsh. and even i catch myself acting like him so it’d be kinda hypocritical. still think he was an asshole sometimes tho, nothing’s changing that

biden dropped out the race in the middle of a baseball game (minor league) mom and i BOLTED and did r research. the democrats r in flamesss 😓😓 republicans next 🤞🤞 glad biden is out, hated his ass, kamala surely will redeem us 🙏🙏🙏 she’s no saint ofc, she’s a politician, but compared to trump she’s jesus the messiah himself. i’d vote her if i could 🥥🥥🥥

[myshredda]

HahaHAAAAAAAAAAAA, prepare yourself for the worst text formatting, and the most basic songs ever 🫡 (Smart)Yellow: Cursed - Jacob lee. Red: The Grace - Neverending White Lights / Twenty Twelve - Matt Maeson. Duck: Close - Crying. Fluffybird: Little hell - City and Colour/Lover Dearest - Marianas Trench / Dancing after death - Matt Maeson (the stripped version is also rly good). How to sleep - EDEN (the deep stitches of a nightmare). There you go! Hope you enjoy <3 -🍓🍷

Sorry this took me so long to answer but I had to like pull up genius and hyperfocus on the lyrics while listening just to get the full vibes, so: absolutely YES to all. You're very good at picking up on little bits of characterizations in songs and connecting them in a way that makes like perfect sense. Like it's kind of amazing.

Smart Yellow 🥲 "Leave my secrets alone/They aren't for you to know/I hear the knock at my door/As they make me vacate my bones" like.....its literally him having the batteries ripped out.....

Neverending White Lights really is SUCH a Red song, good god. Like the "I'll get back to you/God knows I try" bit compared to Red calling the house in ep 6 of the youtube series i'm dying i'm dead. AND Twenty Twelve oh my god. The apathy...the flavor....

AND CLOSE???? "what has passed in between our telephones will undo/two years of mysteries but i still think of you/as my favorite friend" HELP? I'M DYING? the whole fucking song really omg...

And all the fluffybird ones are sooo delcious and angsty gdflhl

City and Colour are oldschool faves of mine so I was like YEAH!!!! when I saw Little Hell on this list ur so fucking right. There IS a degree of difficulty in dealing with me!!

AND THE OPENING OF DANCING AFTER DEATH IS SO THEM LIKE "this place is a hole but i don't want to go/i wish we could stay here forever alone" so real. so so SO real. Also Dancing After Dark is so good like the vibes? the themes??? so real.

AND!!!! You picked one for my fic??? 😭❤️ and it fits so fucking well????? like "how do you love when you're frightened?/the thought of me fucking up all these threads" is so incredibly on theme fjlgfkd like yeah that's red that's my special little guy with emotional trauma and ptsd forever 🥰

Congratulations on having like incredible taste and a huge brain!!!!

[jamiedc-they-them]

Ye who held too much faith (Platonic)

welp hi again, can i request daenerys x brother!reader (or sibling if ur not comfortable writing for male reader) where r gets injured and dany takes care of him. whether he wakes up i leave it up to you

AN/ Thank you! I’m glad you enjoy my writing :D Hope you enjoy!

There had been attempts on your life before. In fact, there had been multiple attempts on both of your lives during your journey together to cross the sea to take what was rightfully your own. The Iron Throne.

For Danny, her main goal was to seize the throne, but the other was to have you survive this war and be an adviser to her. As much as she knew that some families had incestuous tendencies (She was informed about them via Jorah) she broke that cycle when you were born. You were the youngest out of the siblings, thus making her more protective of you.

That’s what made this worse, that you had been hurt because of her mission to grab something to make you both feel more secure.

She had always been the protector, ever since your elder brother struck you, she did all she could to help you through those traumas. To help you feel a little bit safe, even if it meant that he turned his sights on her. It would’ve been worth it, as you would’ve been safe.

Now, here you laid, on the bed with a ghostly white colour to your skin. You looked dead, and maybe you were –

No, she couldn’t think like that, she couldn’t afford to.

You needed to be ok, you had to be. There was no other option; no other way this thing could go, really.

She wouldn’t let it.

“Have you slept yet, my queen?” Tyrion asked as he approached both of you, keeping his eyes on your sister as he spoke. He was clearly worried for her mental health; he knew that she wouldn’t be able to take much more of this. She seemed to just be losing people left and right.

Now it had really gotten personal with you.

You had to be ok, she didn’t care how it happened, you just had to be.

But, first, you had to wake up. You had to open your eyes and prove to the world that you were in fact alive.

 “I’m fine.” She said, though neither in the room believe it. Both could hear the quiver in her voice as she said those false words.

“Y/N might not –”

“Y/N will be fine.” She said, firmly, as if the other option didn’t exist. As said above, she wouldn’t let that version come into existence.

“He might not be.” He warned her, but it fell on death ears.

“He has to be…. He’ll make it, I’m sure of it.” She said, determined to make those words come true.

“As much as I believe in you and your cause, faith can sometimes go misplaced in anything or anyone.” He told her.

That did not get the reaction that he wanted to garner from those words, “Is that a threat?” She asked; as much as she had started to se him as friend, she was still weary of him and whether or not she should let him in.

Still, he was here; no one else had shown up, yet. No one had even asked her that question, yet. But he had. So, that meant something.

“For once, it won’t be.” She said.

The next moment, your hand that she had been holding tighten it’s held a little. It got her attention and stopped the conversation from continuing between the Queen and the Hand of said Queen.

“Are you alright?” Was the first thing your sister asked you as you opened your eyes; you took a moment to survey the room and realise that you were indeed safe and not in any immediate danger.

You then met the slightly worried eyes of your sister; since the day your brother had hit you, she had never fully ceased with that worry in her gaze. She was always mothering you. Hell, she was more of that than a sister at times.

She was mainly that as she wanted you to feel like you could be you. That you could be happy, even if a little. She just wanted you safe.

You were awake sure, but you still weren’t out of the woods, yet.

“What happened?” You asked her with a croaky voice, she passed you a mug of water; one you drank from in a rush, desperate to get yourself back up and ready to go as quickly as you could do.

“I- I, uhm…” She wasn’t sure if you even should know how you ended up like this. She had it all prepared beforehand; her lines rehearsed to a T; but that had all gone out the window the second you had opened your eyes. All she was going on now was instinct, both sisterly and motherly, to make sure that you were ok and see if she could help you in any way.

This was not one of those ways in her book.

“Danny,” She looked into your eyes again, “Please, I just want to know what happened. That’s all.” You told her softly, in an honest tone.

She sighed, knowing that she would only be making things worse if she didn’t tell you.

“Do you need me to fetch the –” Tyrion was about to finish his offer, when Daenerys answered.

“No, I’ll be fine on my own.” Her own voice was soft, she didn’t break eye contact with you. When you heard the door close, Daenerys sat on your bed and grabbed the bandage that the maester had left beforehand.

“Ok.” She said, as she begun to painfully recount what had happened to you.

 “Danny –” You said as you tried to beg your sister to let you go out to try and quell the seemingly endless amount of anarchy reigning outside. She, however, would not budge.

“No, Y/N! For the last time, I’m not letting you go out there, you’re safer here!” You sighed, knowing she was right. But that didn’t mean anything if there were still people dying.

Daenerys secretly hated that part of you, the part that was this selfless; granted, she had it too, just to a much lesser degree. Still, she knew that the fire of a dragon was deadly and rarely could be stopped. She knew that giving you the answer she gave wasn’t helping you; if anything, it was making you more and more impatient and more and more cause to want to go out and fight.

Still, that part of her soon died when the protective part of her overruled that thought.

“You are to stay, Y/N. I need you by my side…. What if you get hurt – what if you – I can’t…I can’t do this alone.” She said, letting her emotions take control now; let her worry be fully known to you. She couldn’t lose the advice you gave her; the way you could read her like a book and vice versa; but, most of all, she couldn’t lose her best friend and only surviving family member she could actually talk and communicate with.

She couldn’t go across the sea and have you not been there, it would feel hollow in doing so. She was waging this war for the both of you, after all. If you died, it would feel like this victory wouldn’t fully be earned.

“Danny,” You said softly as you grabbed her hands in your own, she squeezed them softly, “I…. I’ll stay, if that’s what you want. I’ll stay.” You promised you, even gave her a smile to try and sell it more.

She hugged you tightly, you returned the gesture, “Thank you, little brother.” She said as she then pulled away, planting a kiss on your head, before leaving to try and take back control of her currently burning city.

You let out an attempt of a calming breath as your sister turned the corner before exiting to your chambers. You had indeed done what she had asked, you just weren’t going to stay.

You also hoped that this wouldn’t backfire horribly.

 “How do you know I did that?” You asked Danny as she gently took off your old bandage and replaced it with a new one. Despite not being a maester, she was doing a decent job so far. She hadn’t caused you anymore pain and was quite calm. Externally that was, internally she was worried at making even the slightest mistake and hurting you.

“It was Grey Worm’s best summary of how you got out. No one else saw you; you aren’t as sneaky as you might think you are, sometimes.” She said in a teasing voice that then saddened when she remembered where those actions that got you.

“Oh…”

 The buildings were burning, and the streets were either filled with screaming people or the attackers in the city. You were in the midst of all that, of course; really, you hadn’t fully had a plan set out, mainly it was just go down and fight in any way you could.

You were capable of fighting, just not as well as these people were. You weren’t trained since birth, you weren’t forced to train every day, almost all day.

You were trained for a few hours to around a full day a week before you’d go back to supporting your sister.

So, in short, you were fucked.

You saw one civilian being attacked, and instantly ran over; the attacker swung at you, you ducked and tried to hit him; he, however, dodged and sliced you in the arm.

You sneered as you pulled a dagger and tried once again to attack the person, however, he blocked and punched you.

That was when the blade came down again.

“Why did you do it?” She asked as she wrapped the final new bandage; she did feel a bit stupid having now asked it, as she knew the answer, but she wanted to know your reasoning for it.

“You saved the city your way, I wanted to save it –” You stopped talking as you let out a gasp; Daenerys was set on edge, scared she had done something wrong; however, when your eyes started to show more blood in the corners, she knew it wasn’t her fault.

It was a poison instead.

“Y/N…? Y/N!” She cried out as she held your figure as it started to convulse erratically.

“Maester!” She yelled, hating to leave you, but having to find some help for you.

To make sure that you’d survive.

 The assassin must’ve thought you dead, as they had walked away the next moment. You weren’t, however, gone. But you had failed in your job to protect the woman, her dead and cold eyes stared back at you.

You were bleeding badly; you could almost feel the blood leaving your body. You managed to turn yourself over, only to see smoke still rising from one of the houses. There were still screams, but they were less in mass and fainter; whether that be further away, or you were losing consciousness or that one side was winning.

Only thing was, you didn’t know which one it was.

You turned to your side, placing a hand on the floor, your hand had patches of blood on it dotted around; you placed your second hand, seeing the same thing, only your left one held a lot more blood. That was most likely the hand that was on your now worse wound. You were sure it was probably infected by now.

 “How is he?” Daenerys asked nervously as she paced in the room, the Maester put a rag to your head to try and help with the sweating that had occurred moments after she left, it only made you shiver more however.

“It’s not just poison, my queen,” He told her gravely, “The wound was infected as well from dirt and other objects. Look here,” He pointed to your wound, “Someone had tried to cauterize it; however, they didn’t have much time or a clean instrument to use.” Danny gulped; the odds weren’t exactly in your favour for survival.

She was now allowing herself to panic, this could be your deathbed. This could be it, the moment it all fell apart.

 You fell into a crawl as your wound bled more and more. You groaned as you put your hand that had been scrapping through dirt to it, ignoring what that would do to you and your already agitated wound.

You slowly got back up, stumbling forward towards your palace in an attempt to get back to your room and find a way to patch yourself up without your sister finding you and worrying about you.

That was the last thing you wanted.

Your convulsions had stopped, but your sweating and groaning in pain had not ceased. Daenerys wished there was something she could do. However, in reality, the only thing she could do was hope and pray that the Maester would heal you and this would all be over. She could admonish you and then you both would move on.

Part of her knew, however, that neither of you would be the same after this. No matter what the outcome was. Even thought she hoped for the positive one (as any sister would), she knew that it would hold a lot of questions and doubt in the coming days/months/years until you both would reach your goal.

You reached the door, bloody hand pressing against it, it didn’t take much pressure to open it. Once it did, you pretty much fell inside, letting out another groan as you hit the floor in pain.

Someone reached you, your eyes opened to see Missandei hovering above you worriedly. She was speaking, but those words were lost on you as you felt yourself fading.

When you opened your eyes again to a blurry world, you saw the recognisable clothes of Dany kneeling next to you; you felt the faint touch of her hand as her own words were inaudible to you. But you were sure they were begging you to stay awake and not to leave her.

You closed your eyes one more time. This time not reopening for a while.

 She was outside of the room now, standing outside the door and nervously playing with her fingers. She didn’t have anything to say or do other than to stay silent and wait anxiously for the Maester to walk out of the room.

Finally, they did, but the grim look on their face told Danny all she needed to know.

You were gone.

 Daenerys had cried before over loss; she had cried before over pain. She had never done it over both at the same time, however. This felt like knives stabbing her heart over and over again without pause or an end in sight.

You were gone; her brother and her best friend in the whole world was gone. She was alone now, truly alone; the last of the Targaryen’s and left to carry the burden of being one alone.

She, however, looked out at the view of the city. Of the city you had died for, of the city you had helped her take just like the rest of them.

She let out a breath as she rose from her bed and went out onto the balcony, already missing how you would sometimes rest next to her and talk about your day or your plans for the future.

That would never happen again.

 “Fetch the Maester!” She yelled at anyone who would listen, Missandei was the one who followed through with it and left to get one. She, however, carried your body in her arms and burst into your room, placing your body on the bed.

“Please, Y/N; please, please, please, please. Don’t leave me, not yet. There’s so much we need to do. There’s so much I have to show you.”

 It was an empty promise now. There was, however, one more she could follow through.

That being to take back the kingdoms in your name.

 That fateful day led to a snowball affect: when she left to Winterfell, she was immediately outcasted, having you there would’ve helped calm that, helped her feel less alone; the next was the loss of two of her children, that loss made her fall further away from friends; then, finally, was the death of Missandei, her other best friend and a sister to you both.

It was what made her burn Kings Landing almost entirely to the ground, it was what led to her walking to the throne in a vision she had forgotten about long ago. She did it all in your name; all to make your death mean something.

It ended, however, with a dagger in the heart. As she slipped from this world to whatever came next. Her last thought, however, was of you; when she was an innocent but scared girl, and you were a damaged but happy child.

Those were simpler times, times when you could just be two siblings.

Now, you were both gone; if there was a world after this one, you’d meet there.

She’d make sure of it.

[visionsofus]

i was wondering if i could request "through the fire" by jake etheridge for ur scarletvision series? i love everything you've written so far!

hey anon! I successfully tore my own heart to pieces for this song so I hope you enjoy it! it’s quite angsty and sad but I thought it fit the song. Thanks for sending this request in and I hope you enjoy :) 

| read on AO3 here | mixtape playlist | send me an ask with your song/prompt request |

Track #16: Through the Fire by Jake Etheridge 

synopsis: The Battle of Wakanda is over. Vision knows he's gone and that there is no coming back. Taking pity on Vision, the mind stone lets him see some of his most treasured memories once more, to ease his passing. warning: major character deaths (obviously), grief 

The mind stone had had a long life, that much it was sure of. It wasn’t sentient as such but had gained something of an awareness during its time powering the Vision. So even as it relived the blunt trauma of time’s reversal, forcibly being removed from its host’s head to join its siblings in the usurpers gauntlet, it took pity on the dying synthezoid. He had not asked for this nor had he deserved it. So, the mind stone did what it could to make Vision’s journey to the other side a little easier.

You could never hurt me

I just feel you

I love you—

Vision's last words lingered about his lips, though all around him was silence. Dimly, he was aware that he was dead. Aware that they had failed and that he had been forced to leave Wanda behind. He had become the loss he’d hoped she’d never have to experience again. Blearily, he found his eyes opening to face a bright light and what he thought might be the light at the end of the tunnel. Instead, it was a doorway. Without prompting it swung open, and the light died down, revealing a familiar room and the memory within.

As though in slow motion, Vision experienced the odd sensation of watching himself burst forth from within the cradle at the old Avengers tower. Watching as he hovered before the wall of windows, looking out over the city as his brain struggled to conceptualise a million things at once. He was now a physical form, a layered mind of various constructs and identities. He contended with the power within his hands, at his forehead and in his body. Felt the brightness of life seeping through his body.

The old memory seemed to fast forward and the Vision of the future found himself face to face with Wanda, wishing he could reach out to brush a hand against her cheek even as her brow furrowed in confusion and unease as she beheld his past self.

“I looked in your head and saw annihilation,” she said stepping towards him, towards both of his selves.

“Look again,” Vision echoed his past words and reached out a hand to touch her shoulder, anything to feel the connection that had crackled in the air between them back then. But then the moment was gone and the scene had changed and he found himself stumbling into a different, more familiar space. It already felt like eons since Vision had last been in the Avengers Compound and he was faced with the harsh realisation that this, whatever this was, would be the final time he could see it. The memory captured before him was from only a few days before Wanda had been arrested after their fight in Germany. Two years had passed since then, but it might as well have been yesterday.

Vision wasn’t a passing spectator this time, he was himself. He lay atop Wanda’s covers, a book propped open on his chest though he had lost interest in reading it an hour ago.

They’d often spent nights together like this, before she’d had to leave. Some nights it cost too much for her to try and be by herself, and on those occasions Vision was happy to remain by her side, a comforting presence ready if she was forced from her slumber by night terrors.

But that night all those years ago had not been a bad night for her, she had asked him to stay simply because she wanted him there. And Vision didn’t know how to take that. It was precisely why he had lost such focus of the novel in front of him, trying to unpick what this new development meant for both of them. Of course, the distraction wasn’t helped by the fact that Wanda had fallen asleep with her head resting on his stomach.

Vision was sure that the past version of his self had been caught up in his own thoughts, trying to understand Wanda’s behaviour in this moment. But reliving things a second time he slowed down, cast the doubts away and let himself relish in the memory. It was likely one of the last peaceful moments they had shared in this first home of theirs and he was grateful to be given another opportunity to be with Wanda like this one more time.  

“Did we waste time, my love?” He wondered aloud and almost hoped that Wanda would wake up and reassure him. But she hadn’t in the memory and so she didn’t now.

Shutting the book and putting it on the bedside table, Vision slid down further on the bed, making sure he didn’t jostle Wanda. Now with her head a comforting warmth atop his chest he let himself rest. Not quite sleeping, but he closed his eyes and wished he might be able to live in this carefree moment forever. To stay here, before everything had become infinitely more complicated.

Did he regret how difficult things became? Did he regret signing the Accords? It was difficult to say, given he’d never get the opportunity to go back and see how things may have played out if he’d run away with Wanda. No, he wouldn’t change things, because that decision had put him on the path towards her and he wouldn’t change any of it for the world. It was why he had given himself up so easily in Wakanda, all in the hope that she’d get another chance even if it wasn’t with him. As though sensing the sharp turn his thoughts were taking the scene changed again and this time Vision opened his eyes to the warmth of the afternoon sun.

Another 3 months later he was stretched out on a different bed in a different room, light streaming through the window. He raised a hand to shield his eyes even as the rays were blocked out by the woman sitting up beside him.

Wanda propped herself up with one arm and smiled sleepily at him. For the second time, Vision’s face spread into a grin as he took her in, her messy hair highlighted in a halo of sunlight at her back. A soft wind blew through the open window, mussing her hair and he caught a lock between his fingers, tucking it away from her face again. As he had before, he left his hand against her cheek, his pinkie brushing her jawline gently. They’d touched each other fleetingly like this, neither ready to make the first move in advancing their relationship. It was those early weeks after everything went down with the Accords and they’d started secretly seeing each other, neither quite convinced it was the responsible thing to do.

Wanda had made the decision then and there, he’d seen the light shift in her eyes as her smile dropped and become something infinitely more tender. He’d tilted his head as she neared him and though it was the first time, she’d kissed him, in this memory it now felt like the last.

Vision leant into the kiss, cupping her cheeks with both hands and desperately holding onto the memory, terrified of letting go. But time was speeding up again and the scene was changing. He desperately reached out to hold onto Wanda even as the scenery blurred and settled about him. He was in a different country now, stood in the kitchen of a rustic cabin. Vision froze with his hand on the kettle which had just finished boiling for Wanda’s morning coffee.

The Switzerland trip. The place they’d both left pieces of their heart at a house isolated up a mountain. A secret place they’d sworn to come back to but now, never would. A distinct feeling was growing in his gut, an awareness that something or someone was letting him go back to enjoy these few memories.

“Vis?” Wanda’s voice called out and he hurried about getting her favourite mug and making the drink just as she liked it.

“Coming, darling,” he called out, even if it was not what he had said back at this point in time. If anything, he was sure that he had teased her about her growing reliance on caffeine, but now couldn’t bring himself to, even if it had been all in good fun. He could feel the clock running out. Even now he felt less present, his feet not quite touching the ground, the warm mug in his hand a distant maybe.

The only thing that was clear was Wanda as he stepped out onto the porch, coming face to face with where he had left her, curled up in a blanket looking out at the spring forest surrounding their little corner of the universe.

“What would I ever do without you?”  Wanda joked, scrunching her nose happily and taking the steaming cup out of his hands. She patted the seat next to her and with a tight throat Vision took his place next to her.

“We should stay here forever.”

“We should have,” he murmured, pulling himself closer so that he might wrap his arms around her shoulders and hold her close.

“We could make a life here,” Wanda said echoing a past conversation, a past future they’d once dreamt up for each other. “We could stay here all year around, have a vegetable patch for the spring, and a log pile for the winter.”

As she mused over the technicalities of keeping warm in the Swiss mountains in the midst of winter, Vision tucked his chin into the crook of her neck and breathed the crisp air in. He tried his best to feel as present as he could even as memory grew fuzzy around the edges. His arms were tight around her even as she talked over the library they could create inside the cabin and the husky they could get for the cold climate.

“It sounds perfect, my love,” Vision said pressing a kiss to her cheek. Then, something he hadn’t said those months earlier. “I should have made you stay here with me; I should have asked you to stay sooner.”

His voice turned to a thick whisper as his eyes blurred with tears, resigned in knowing that he never could have stopped their future from happening. They’d been destined for a tragic end from the beginning. He kept a hold of her for as long as he could, focusing on the way she turned her head to press a kiss to his cheek one last time.

And then slowly, she disappeared from his arms, leaving an empty space before him that might as well have stretched on for miles and eons. A distance so great and a grief so overwhelming Vision dropped to his knees. He pressed a hand to his chest, feeling as though all the air had been torn from his body and that in place of his heart there were pieces of something never to be whole again. He wasn’t sure if he believed in souls, but in that moment, Vision knew that he had lost everything.

He was going now; he could feel it. That light at the end of the tunnel was back and he shakily pulled himself to his feet.

And as quickly as he’d felt the loss he became aware that he wasn’t, his broken pieces flying back together as he felt her soul join him again. A shadow appeared up ahead, a hand outstretched towards him.

He did his best to walk, taking one step after the other knowing they were the last steps he’d ever take. But that was okay because it was Wanda he was walking towards and he’d travel through the smoke and fire for her. Battle life and death itself. He’d travel to the furthest ends of the unknown if it meant he could be with her again.

“Wanda,” he gasped as she came into view, no longer bloodied and bruised as they had been from the battles.

“Vis,” she whispered in relief, taking his hand with a soft smile.

“I was too late,” he managed to get out, realising what her being here before him meant. There would be no future, for neither of them.

“It was always too late,” Wanda said sadly rubbing her thumb over the back of his hand.

“It’s over.” Vision knew there was no way back from death for him. This was final. And despite all they’d done, Wanda hadn’t made it either.

“Let’s go home, Vis,” Wanda said and slowly, tenderly, pulled him towards the waiting expanse of light.

He focused on her eyes, at the hand wrapped around his own, at the Wanda he loved leading him forward to the future one last time.

And stepped through.

______________________________________

taglist open (to be tagged when I update dm or ask to be added to the list)

[cloveroctobers]

ELISA FRANÇOIS —

IG info/bio: @/elisacoisbabe | 34.2k followers | why yes I’m shaking my ass while having a mental breakdown, mind ur business yeah?? 👸🏿

22 (23) years

Born in Louisiana, New Orleans

Has two sisters: Camille & Manon

Raised by her aunt & uncle in London, England

Does not address her birth parents as her real parents, her aunt & uncle hold that title & deff has a lot of anger towards her birth parents—to her they’re as good as d*ad

Haitian roots

Keeps her family life as private as she can, however her fans occasionally see her sisters on her channel

Social media influencer who got her start from posting makeup looks on her YouTube channel & her story times

Canon: calls her fans “Elisa-bee’s” we don’t know why either

Loves 80’s style blush

Loves 80s music & aesthetic and she liked it before u teenagers hopped on the bandwagon, sorry not sorry ;-)

Doesn’t feel Lottie is competition at all when it comes to posting content even if fans feel that way, they have completely different techniques

Vacations in Paris & Louisiana often

Her older sister, Manon resides in Louisiana and when they link up??? Issa vibe

Camille is the youngest & kinda a party pooper, she’s more on the serious side

Loves snacking on macaroons... salted caramel praline & lavender white chocolate are her favorites (I feel like I said this about someone else too...)

She’s scared of owls/any type of birds partly from a childhood trauma where she was attacked by a bunch of seagulls on a pier & as punishment when she was up to no good, her parents would force her to watch “the birds” (1963) strapped to a chair

Went thru a “ugly phase” growing up & was often called “lady-b*y”

Has been in multiple relationships/entanglements/situations/experiences but there are many that she doesn’t count & or acknowledge “I hope no one considers me an ex especially if they couldn’t make me c*m”

Has had threes*mes before

Sex posi!

Supports trans lives!

In the last few years she was recently diagnosed with borderline personality disorder

When she finished secondary, she didn’t think uni was for her. Found school rather boring although she did quite well at it. She was exhausted with everything that came with it & decided to go into stripping for a couple of months (almost a year) before she decided to work on her YouTube channel

Currently in a polyamorous relationship

A few of her experiences with her significant others got jealous of her job, the attention she got from it & the time she put into her job as a influencer— it was annoying

Gemini sun + Sagittarius moon + Capricorn rising? Idk man but she’s got Leo & Scorpio in her chart too I’m sure of it

Has no problem bringing her issues with someone to the table

Kinda likes confrontation but only if SHE’s the one to start it, not if SOMEONE ELSE does it FOR her, due to her spreading the info around in the first place...

Will try her best to read someone but sometimes her comebacks lack...

Still doesn’t like Chelsea, Jo, OR Shannon & it’s been a year but she don’t gaf

Found herself a friend in Blake

They’re opposites, she’s more laid back & slightly reserved whereas when Elisa enters the place you KNOW it because she makes it known—she loves to be seen

After Marisol & Graham called it quits, Elisa swept in & they explored what they could be? Intimately. Yet Elisa doesn’t seem like she’s ready to settle down right now & she doesn’t HAVE to while Marisol seems like she likes to have fun too BUT is also always thinking two steps ahead—she’s calculated, so a small part of her thought of the what if’s? But knew there was a chance there shouldn’t be any strings attached

That shifted their friendship forsure!!! Priya told them it was a bad idea from the start but Elisa had some snippy words for her ofc “mind ur business luv, or I’ll do it for ya x”

She thought about ghosting marisol for a little bit to see if she’d chase after her, she loves to be chased but decided not to. She was upfront about their rendezvous after awhile, she agreed if they ever got lonely again to hit each other up...but marisol doesn’t feel like what they had was based on loneliness...

Probably still has a crush on Bobby & was kinda mad he asked someone else to marry him but she still showed up to the reunion/wedding like the baddest bitch she knows she is, ‘got to make him regret not choosing me, ya know?’

Will chat with him every now & then but Bobby being the friendly guy he is doesn’t pay much attention to her seduction or rather he ignores it but if it gets too much he’ll gently tell her about herself

Hey, Elisa knows shade when she sees it & can be a shady bitch when she wants to be too

Only drinks the real ginger ale not the fake one the rest of u lot drink

Has no issue showing her figure, she loves her body, she loves herself, & that took along time to appreciate so she doesn’t care if people view that as arrogant, most don’t know her story & if they still shitted on her for it then they can all fuck right off

She has a soft side too...somewhere in there but it’s very rare to see! Only ONE of her exes had the chance of seeing it

She has a image to protect & show the world but there’s going to be a time where she gets tired of constantly putting on a show

Is a sucker for animation films & whenever there’s a sad moment in the film she deff triggered!

Has two dogs: Dachshund & a chihuahua

Makes the best Pikliz

loves a good lace front, will drop bands on one whenever she feels like she needs something new & that’s quite often

Owns a bedazzler kit

Has a stun gun

Can make her own jewelry + working on starting a line for it

Body scrubs are to die for in her opinion, her skin HAS to be soft & she’s always moisturized. That’s right stay away from her if ur ashy cause she’ll bring shame to you

She’s slightly a mean girl/bitchy I feel like we all know this lmao

Live tweeted about season 3 & dragged it like we all did with no remorse

I feel like she’s a wild sleeper? Lol

Enjoys not only 80s style music but Lofi beats, cocaine80s, PARTYNEXTDOOR, IAMDDB, Ravyn Lenae, VanJess, Ibeyi, Tayla Parx, CITY GIRLS, & Kash doll, saweetie, etc

Celeb crushes: Zoe Kravitz & Lenny Kravitz, Issa Rae, Winston Duke, Theo James, Robert Pattinson, Alexa Demie, Kelvin Harris Jr., Kedar Williams-Stirling...

Anthem: Dreezy ft. Kash Doll — Chanel Slides

[eciled-moved]

𝐂𝐇𝐀𝐑𝐀𝐂𝐓𝐄𝐑 𝐒𝐇𝐄𝐄𝐓 ( repost, don’t reblog ! )

𝐛𝐚𝐬𝐢𝐜𝐬

FULL NAME.  Amara (”Riven”) Fury  NICKNAME.  Riv, the Exile (not preferred), and less pleasant ones about her crimes against Ionia GENDER. demigirl (uses she/her) HEIGHT.  5′5′’ - 5′6′‘ ft AGE. 35 (27 in modern) ZODIAC. aries rising, virgo sun, scorpio moon  SPOKEN LANGUAGES. Common tongue is her most fluent/most spoken; her Ur-Noxian was mostly learned as a child in Trevale, and it is more useful in the military to speak common when hunting for new territories. However, she still knows enough to hold a decent conversation. She speaks a passable amount of Ionian. 

𝐩𝐡𝐲𝐬𝐢𝐜𝐚𝐥 𝐜𝐡𝐚𝐫𝐚𝐜𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐢𝐬𝐭𝐢𝐜𝐬

HAIR COLOR. white, though her hair color at birth was a sandy brown. the rumor goes that losing her parents and being transferred to the orphanage where she had to work caused her enough stress to change its color.  EYE COLOR.  amber (red when channeling ki) SKIN TONE. warm, golden-tan.  BODY TYPE. Endomorph (shorter, stocky, with a curvy/round physique) VOICE. despite her intimidating apperance, she sounds more soft-spoken than she really is. not always quiet, but gentle, even contemplative in nature.  DOMINANT HAND. right  POSTURE. erect; she typically carries herself with her chest forward and her shoulders level,  ready to be on the offense.   SCARS. her biggest scar is the c-section-like cut along her abdomen from her hysterectomy. has additional scars loitered along her upper arms and shoulders (and the occasional leg scar), most white and faded from her time in the military.  TATTOOS. she has the Virgo symbol tattooed just above her ear and on her scalp. When all her hair is pulled up in a bun, you can see it.  BIRTHMARKS. N/A MOST NOTICEABLE FEATURE(S). her white hair, the way she carries herself in as space, her curvy physique, her eye color 

𝐜𝐡𝐢𝐥𝐝𝐡𝐨𝐨𝐝

PLACE OF BIRTH. Trevale, a small farming village owned by Noxus HOMETOWN. see above SIBLINGS. none PARENTS. an Ionian mage and a Noxian general 

𝐚𝐝𝐮𝐥𝐭 𝐥𝐢𝐟𝐞

OCCUPATION. former commander for the Fury Company, now a semi-nomadic, independent fighter (Modern: part time florist, veteran. some verses include a previous history as an escort.) CURRENT RESIDENCE. predominantly resides in Ionia. (Modern: an apartment in Brooklyn) CLOSE FRIENDS.  Karma usually ends up being a good mentor/friend to Riven. @sanguiresse​ has also worked his way to her heart in a bloodthirsty-but-sentimental manner. Her other friends vary by verse.  RELATIONSHIP STATUS. i default to single unless interacting with a specific muse that she is with. my list will get too long if i count everybody she’s in a relationship (or working to one) :3 FINANCIAL STATUS. by most standards, one would call Riven “impoverished.” her income is inconsistent - if she doesn’t find a village to work some errands for, or pickpocket rouge criminals who harass her, then she can find herself short on money. she doesn’t mind, however; she has the Konte’s she can return to at any time, and she knows enough to live off the land to make her way around the country without spending much on commerce. the only time she’s inclined to spend money is if staying in an inn/tavern will spare her from bad weather conditions, or is on the way to a specific destination, along with foodstuffs and what have you.  DRIVER’S LICENSE. Driving a car gives her anxiety as it makes her feel ‘boxed in’ and at the mercy of other drivers. a motorcycle is easier for her to overcome that mental block and so sometimes she can be seen riding one, but in a crowded city like Brooklyn, it’s usually easier for her to use public transit.  VICES. wrath, lust. 

𝐬𝐞𝐱 & 𝐫𝐨𝐦𝐚𝐧𝐜𝐞

SEXUAL ORIENTATION. bisexual, prefers men PREFERRED EMOTIONAL ROLE. submissive | dominant | switch PREFERRED SEXUAL ROLE. submissive | dominant | switch LIBIDO. very high. her ki gives her a wellspring of energy, which is why despite an initial impression of her demeanor being calm, is temperamental. her passionate nature makes her a lover who’s not afraid to flirt with who she likes if she wants them. for a relationship to thrive with her, she generally prefers a partner with a libido that can match hers.  TURN ON’S. being spanked, hair tugging, marking, praise (i.e. “good girl”), internal cumshots TURN OFF’S. hard bdsm (i.e. degrading, slapping), somebody who doesn’t know how to lead in bed LOVE LANGUAGE.  acts of service & physical touch RELATIONSHIP TENDENCIES. Riven tends to commit quickly with her body (she is a physical person in many aspects and it’s how she expresses her love), but needs time to articulate her truest feelings and can be plagued by doubt that it would work because (insert a reason usually associated with the fact that she’s made too many mistakes to be worth it). once she commits, however, she wants to be yours for a long time, only wanting to break up if she feels that the relationship truly cannot be saved.

𝐦𝐢𝐬𝐜𝐞𝐥𝐥𝐚𝐧𝐞𝐨𝐮𝐬

CHARACTER’S THEME SONG. halycon — windhand HOBBIES TO PASS TIME. in main, she likes to sketch out her own maps as she makes her way around Runeterra, and compare it to maps in circulation. she also enjoys walking and going over her learned fighting techniques to stay sharp. in modern, her main hobby is gardening.  ALIGNMENT. somewhere between chaotic neutral and chaotic good, depending on the verse and the circumstances  PHOBIAS. she doesn’t have a specific phobia, it’s more just the trauma around the war that triggers intense anxiety, typically enough to make her short-tempered and paranoid. it also gives her chronic bouts of insomnia.  SELF CONFIDENCE LEVEL. even on her worst days, Riven is confident she can kick your ass.  VULNERABILITIES. the war and her ptsd around it. could also develop anxiety around abandonment if she enters a relationship out of difficulty trusting. 

[ayeshintheclouds]

I watched Never Have I Ever!! And I have many many thoughts. Just about on every aspect of it so oops this might be kinda long. But I like having somewhere public to post it cuz I don’t have to be apologetic and guilty about making it long, cuz if I was texting someone id feel as if I’m making them obligated to read so much.

Anyways!

Overall, I quite enjoyed the show! There’s a lot of controversy around it, i keep saying a lot of indian girls complaining about being misrepresented. Which I agree that they have a right to, because it’s the first time we’ve ever gotten a main character representing us, and we can’t help but hold her to a higher standard. But I’m trying to look past that a little, past the stereotypes and see it more by itself in terms of a plot and character development rather than just the cultural standpoint.

In no particular order, here are some opinions about the show and characters:

I loved the realistic arguments they show the night of her dad’s death. Honestly, they were a bit jarring how similar they are to our family, and how sometimes under pressure everyone kinda turns on each other and doesn’t get along. I thought that was a really realistic scene how a little thing like losing a music sheet ends up turning into a lot of unnecessary drama.

I love Paxton! I still absolutely can’t decide who I ship more with Devi but I do love his character. He genuinely does care for his sister, and he’s so quick to sacrifice his pride and call Devi when his sister needs help, even though he’s really mad at Devi rn. I think it’s adorable that his sister even gives him relationship advice. And Paxton is genuinely such a good friend, although he’s tryna be all cool and stuff, he encouraged her to be herself in her indian dress and I hate how Devi disregards his whole personality and only wants him physically. It upset me that she only saw him as some status symbol to obtain, never really an actual human with feelings. He deserved better, so although I love him, I’m not sure I ship him with her after she kinda used him the whole show.

The car ride scene!!! With Paxton and Devi! Ok I watched this scene approximately a bajillion times! I think it might be my favorite moment in the whole show. I love everything about it, the subtle glances they cast each other the entire time, the neon lights as they drive through the city, the way for once in the show she seems somewhat like emotionally vulnerable and nervous rather than brash and hot headed. The music was beautiful too.

I love Fab and Eleanor!!! I love their stories and I’m so so glad they got the attention from the show at least since they didn’t get it from Devi. Fab is literally so adorable and I just wanted to hug her🥺 Eleanor’s mom made me so frikin mad and I’m truly really glad Eleanor learned to live without her and how Fab helps her deal with it. I know it’s pretty dramatic how she stays dressing all different and changing her personality, but I related to that so much:(when someone hurts me or walks out on me, it makes me feel not like myself anymore, and I often visibly and noticeably change my attitude and behavior for a while before springing back.

The Kamala plotline!!! Uhhhhh ok very mixed feelings. I thought Steve was adorable. They just discarded him when he was an absolute sweetheart and it made me so sad for him🥺poor Steve. I do like that they’re actually showing arranged marriage for what it is though. In my opinion it is a very traditional and flawed procedure, as we see when Devi’s mom has kamala wear a certain outfit and has her hide the career part of her personality, to try to be a certain way she’s not. BUT I think i am glad that they didn’t show it as something forced upon her, like she’s being married off against her will to some creep she’s never ever met. It’s more like a blind date but arranged by parents. And although she is pretty pressured into it, she has the power to back out any time (even if it’ll somewhat outcast her). And I like that they decide to continue their relationship but on their own terms and he likes her for who she is. I think overall it’s a pretty solid and realistic representation of arranged marriage: a very traditional way of doing things with many flaws, but not forced or oppressive or morally wrong in any way, and can usually work out quite nicely many times. Except why’d they break poor Steve’s heart like that:(((

Ben. Ok Ben grew on me a lot through the show. He was such a complex and interesting character and I thought his development was so amazingly done. I thought he was truly such a sweet soul for doing all that he did for her, letting her stay over, convincing her to spread the ashes, driving her there so fast. I almost feel like he doesn’t deserve her either😂. And hhfjdndndnd I really don’t know how to feel about that end scene that was wild omg. But romance aside. Ben is such a well written character and I think he really was neglected by his family and I really hope that changes or he finds a family in Devi’s.

I know her parents and the therapist were side characters. But I think they’re pretty cool. I like the really sweet relationship her parents had. It was so typical indian parents yet adorable. The motorcycle ride and the comforting scene🥺 I love them a lot they remind me of my own parents. And I think her mom is infinitely strong for dealing with the death of her soulmate and Devi being so absolutely difficult. I think the therapist was extremely patient and the scenes with her were hilarious. I loved most about her how genuine she was. No therapist irl would care enough for the patients health that they would so blatantly disagree with them and even suggest they find someone else if it’ll help them. They would never risk losing the money and offending the client. I once heard someone say that they’d love to be a child therapist cuz all they have to do is agree with everything the kids say, be like “aw yeah the world hates u ur parents hate u, ur right” like feed into their teen angst, and the kid convinces their parents to keep paying for your services. But Dr Ryan is like a mother. She just wants what’s best for Devi, and she’s willing to sacrifice her own profit for it.

Ok I guess I should probably talk about my biggest issue with the show which is Devi. I kinda hate her😭I tried so hard I really did but I genuinely cannot bring myself to like her character. I don’t agree with almost any of her actions and her behavior upset me a lot. And pls you don’t understand she nearly killed me with second hand embarrassment the first episode in approaching Paxton like that aaAAAA Like I was basically watching through my hands at that point. I know she’s going through so much, she really has a lot of trauma and grief. But I can’t help but feel like the way she handles it is not very realistic at all, cuz I know people with trauma and they would never use it to justify the awful things she does. I know that everyone grieves differently and everyone has different coping mechanisms, but I just cannot bring myself to like her. Coping mechanisms that hurt others immensely are so unhealthy and I feel like she should’ve at least redeemed herself somehow. Maybe I sympathized with her at some points. But never liked her. I think she was disgusting to her friends, she always assumed her problems mattered more than theirs despite Fab and Eleanor having such heavy stuff happening. She didn’t even bother caring, and I’m convinced the only reason she even came back and tried to make it up was because of her own selfish reasons: she didn’t want to be lonely and friendless (she literally admits that!) and she’s jealous of that new kid they’re friends with. She does not seem at any point to actually care for their feelings as humans, and treats them like status symbols, two objects she owns to show people she has a social life. She reminds me of Greg from Diary of a Wimpy Kid and not in a good way; he was so awful to Rowley and obsessed with popularity and narcissistic Blegh. Also with Paxton like I mentioned before, she only cares about his body and popularity and literally does not care for his friendship and personality the slightest bit. I think it was disgusting that she lied about sleeping with him like that, cuz it may have been manageable to him, but for a lot of people, that’s like a pretty messed up thing and I don’t think they’d want to be friends with someone who was that creepy and a blatant liar. The stuff she said to her mom about wishing she was dead, that absolutely broke my heart. I can’t imagine being her mother in that moment and hearing your daughter say something like that after losing the love of your life. I think that would be like the worst thing to say to someone grieving, and might potentially endanger their mental health. I was truly worried for her mom, even though I know it wouldn’t be that type of show. Honestly. The only reason I don’t like full on despise her and think she’s irredeemable is because I pity her so much. She lost her dad and wasn’t able to walk for a year. That’s a lot of pain. But truly, like Fab said, it’s not a free pass to be a jerk. And a character shouldn’t be written in a way that their only redeemable quality is that u pity them to hold them less accountable for their actions.

Overall I enjoyed the show!! Minus devi😭but besides that, I’m so glad we’re getting some representation and there’s a new really cute and fresh show to watch during quarantine. I NEED A SEASON TWO SO BAD PLS and I really really hope Devi grows up a bit more in it and maybe I’ll start to like her:)

[clamorbelli]

hey lovelies ! i’m jaz, & i’m here to enter ur lives with my incessant use of the exclamation point & love hearts !!! <3 <3 <3 i love videogames, milkshakes, and i’m currently melting in this uk heat since i’m a simple winter child. pls excuse the parts of my blog that are still messy af, i’m slowly sorting out stats, nav, etc ( all the boring bits ) and trying to make it all look semi-presentable, so whilst i do that there are some key points about my two babies, angelo and noelle, under the cut. i apologise in advance for how long these got! pls don’t hate me ok i’m bad at pArApHrAsInG.

like this if you’d like to plot or feel free to message me either through my ims or on my discord – arcanine#0252 ! 

◟ * ◊ ─  benjamin wadsworth + cismale + he/him » * believe it or not angelo belongs to the mancini family. they are 19 years of age and are known to usually spend their time around magnolia’s coffee shop. the college dropout has been living in victoria for his entire life. the people closest to them describe the heterosexual + capricorn to be +placid and +tenacious as well as -calculated and -faultfinding » ◦ ° jaz, twenty-two, she/her, gmt◝

trigger warnings: death, suicide mention.

meet angelo ! more commonly known as angel by his late mother and those in his super inner circle. youngest of the mancini clan, and now 1/2 of the remaining duo, he’s dropped out of college to keep a close eye on rocco and the family estate in general.

i’ll put more about his past in his biography, since i’d ideally wanna’ iron all the details first, but he was a massive momma’s boy and always has been despite her problems. all you really need to know for plotting is that he’s been in victoria his entire life, except –––

from when he went to college last year !!! wow ! smart boy. angelo actually got accepted into MIT to study biomedical engineering, and for the year or so he was able to attend, he was incredibly passionate. he hated being away from his mom at the time, but he never let it show, as he did with most things.

when she died in late 2018, after only a few months of angelo being enrolled, he was a mess behind closed doors. he found it hard to cope, and even harder to come to terms with the fact he hadn’t been there for her in her final moments, even if it was self-caused. however, not knowing his father’s own mental state, angelo chose to stay in massachusetts, planning to come home for the funeral and that alone.

the news of his father’s suicide came not long after, though angelo’s reaction to that was far less visceral. he chose to come home only for a week, to see how his brother was and to attend funerals and events, mind falling straight into business mode and making sure to give his brother a long list of things he needed to keep an eye on. angelo had faith that rocco would handle things for the next two years whilst he graduated. things fell apart quick.

he continued to attend MIT for as long as he could, but news of rocco’s lifestyle and attitude always slinked its way down the grapevine to angelo, the nineteen year old boy at the university of his dreams. for him, a loyal mancini til’ the grave and a child who’d lost his mother, the choice to drop out of university wasn’t difficult. he left at the end of his first year, at the end of june, and has been home ever since. the staff tried to stop him, his circle of friends tried to stop him, but the choice had been made. he was going back to victoria.

does he resent his brother for what he’s had to do? not at all, he could never resent his best friend, but angelo would be lying if he said victoria was where he wanted to be. he’s now working closely with the current family accountant, being alongside him so he can keep the closest eye possible on the family finances and know what kind of deals and discussions he can afford possible business partners. it’s not surprising most turn their noses up at a nineteen year old trying to make business deals, but most are thrown onto their asses when he speaks.

PERSONALITY –––

angel is... kinda difficult? but also compared to his brother, he’s super easy to deal with. he’s a bit icy, but he doesn’t do it to ‘keep people away’ or anything like that, it’s just his natural demeanour, and he always appreciates people who aren’t bothered by his cool attitude at first and are willing to forge a friendship with him of some kind, though his persona in general naturally rubs people the wrong way.

he’s incredibly calm, and there’s very little that can be said or done to provoke any kind of reaction related to anger out of him.

he doesn’t like failure, but he is of the mindset that it makes you better as a person. however he despises people who let their failures or traumas affect them massively as people, so much so to the point where it affects their success. that’s one thing angelo has inherited from his father, his drive. his greed for succeeding. money isn’t the goal here, power is.

he’s practically a prodigy. his intelligence is off the scale and whilst 50% of that is natural ability, the other 50% is his own hard work and diligence. he’s not afraid to let you know how smart he is, nor will he accept anyone trying to tell him he’s only where he is because of his family. he seriously works his ass off, so much so you’d forget his family’s already wealthy and think he’s gone some kind of debt to pay off. angel’s always working on something, always scribbling away some kind of idea in his notebooks or planning something.

literally never stops pointing out faults in other people, thanks angel.

tends to think entirely with his head and is good at pushing emotion out of the equation 99% of the time. he’s very, very logical, plans pretty much all of his day, every day. spontaneity isn’t a word in his vocabulary and he doesn’t think his life is any worse off without it.

he has a penchant for pastries and good coffee and so you can nearly always find him these days at magnolia’s coffee shop. he enjoys his own company and therefore is usually alone, but won’t turn down the company of a friend so long as they don’t speak. at all.

◟ * ◊ ─  phoebe tonkin + cisfemale + she/her » * believe it or not noelle mercier is working for the bianchi family. they are 28 years of age and are known to usually spend their time around crystal woods. the escort, who has been a part of the alliance for 3 years, has been living in victoria for 4 years. the people closest to them describe the bisexual + pisces to be +tenderhearted and +intuitive as well as -pithless and -elusive » ◦ ° jaz, twenty-two, she/her, gmt◝

trigger warnings: death, sex work, suicidal thoughts, predatory behaviour, murder.

disclaimer: noelle’s soft. as fuck.

she was born in the south of france to two very french parents. she grew up there for most of her young life, living idyllically with little care. she was brought up to be kind and compassionate. her mother ran a sanctuary for local, injured wildlife and her father was a passionate journalistic photographer who travelled the world. she was exposed to culture, love, and nature when she was younger, and it shows to this day.

life was not to be all sunshine and rainbows for noelle. at sixteen, her father got caught up in a warzone, shot in action and killed on the spot. noelle’s mother experienced a complete psychotic breakdown, unable to look after herself, let alone noelle. the young girl watched, helpless, as the woman she had admired for so many years disappeared, taking the final memories of her beloved father with her. noelle was sent to live with her aunt in america, a continent that didn’t favour girls as gentle as her.

she quickly realised her only friend and ally in this new place was her cousin, louisa. her aunt was a horrible, hard woman who seemed to hate both of the girls with a seething passion, and her uncle leered at noelle whenever he could, copping feels and whispering inappropriate nothings into her ear. noelle and louisa protected each other, spent most of their nights out, eventually finding trouble.

noelle met him when she was on the brink of turning eighteen. maybe that’s what he used to justify it in a state where the age of consent was 16. robert misfer was rich. he was the diamond in their city. he paid for everything and anything anyone could ever want. he got whatever he wanted, and he wanted noelle. she was young, she was impressionable, and she fell so madly in love with someone she thought was her prince. they dated for four years when she should’ve been with boys her age. he had a wife and kids. she had her high school diploma. he put her through university. she answered his every beck and call. louisa tried her best to stop her, but what could she say? robert took noelle from the prying eyes of her uncle. in noelle’s eyes, they weren’t the same.

sometime during this whole ordeal robert bought noelle and louisa an apartment, allowing them their independence at the cost of noelle’s dignity.

until one day, robert disappeared. he had moved away with his family the day after noelle’s graduation. she was destroyed. she couldn’t do anything for weeks straight, louisa could do nothing except convince her to keep living – and eventually, she began to recover.

that was when louisa revealed a secret – cam work. noelle was in a bad place, she was  a beautiful young woman who felt unloved and unwanted, so louisa suggested she cam on the side for cash. louisa didn’t realise just how desperate noelle was for love, the love she had replaced with the attention she gained from her fans.

she worked as a cam girl for years, doing it partly for the money, partly for the enjoyment she got from feeling empowered, and partly for the toxic reason of finally being able to get the affection and attention she wanted. she loved being a cam girl, it was her whole life, until word got out in their neighbourhood.

they shunned noelle. treated her as if she should’ve been ashamed of what she’d been doing despite the fact they all did much worse behind closed doors. she withdrew into herself again for a week, stopped streaming completely and closed down her account. it rocked her fanbase but noelle could hardly cope. she wasn’t built to receive criticism like this, especially criticism for something that had brought her so much joy, something she saw nothing wrong with.

it all came to a head one night. noelle had locked herself in her room when her aunt and uncle came to their apartment, demanding to see her and berate her for what she’d done. louisa stood at the front door, defiant, radiant, beautifully strong... but she was no match for their horrendous uncle, her own father, who beat his own daughter with his bare hands until she couldn’t breathe. noelle witnessed it all, had left her room when she heard the screams, held her cousin – no, her sister – in her arms as she died on their living room floor. her uncle had disappeared by the time the police arrived, and once the police themselves learned of noelle’s job? they could barely afford her a drop of respect. louisa’s death went unpunished. the world continued revolving. noelle was lost.

the harassment eventually got so bad that she had no choice but to move, but where was she even supposed to start? it’s not like she had any family anymore, all of her friends had long since abandoned her to avoid the fallout of knowing her, and the last boyfriend she’d had... well, we all know how that went. it wasn’t until she stumbled upon an old newspaper clipping tucked away in her cousins belongings that she knew where to go – victoria.

as morbid as it was, the newspaper clipping described the deaths of fifty of the victoria residents at the bronze, and noelle knew immediately it was where she needed to be. no one would judge her there. it was a place seeped full of history that people daren’t speak of. it was somewhere she could hide, and that’s what noelle did best.

she successfully moved to victoria four years ago, where she finally restarted her cam girl career. eventually, after a year, someone involved with the bianchi family sought her out and offered her the job of a lifetime. not only was noelle protected as an escort, she earned much more money. whilst in her day to day life she was still awkward and shy, her camming allowed her to separate her job from her personal life, letting her focus on her goal of making people happy and making her a very effective escort. 

she loves animals! loves nature! wiccan! this will all be in her stats but like !!!! U NEED TO KNOW !!!!!

PERSONALITY –––

noelle, despite everything, is perhaps the most tenderhearted person you could meet. she’s gentle, trusting, and patient. she treats everyone as if they’re the most precious person in the world and looks at everything with a sense of wonder and amazement. she’s v generous, just loves !!! helping people !!!

wishes she was a princess and is waiting for a prince to sweep her off her feet. i’m not joking. literally loves love and romanticises everything like jesus shut up noelle please. 

she has no backbone. her parents, and then louisa, were her backbone for her entire life, protecting her and coddling her until it was too late for her to develop a spine of her own. she allows people to walk all over her with no consequence, lets them use her until there is nothing of her left, and she’s the one forced to rebuild. but it doesn’t matter, if the other person is happy, that’s all noelle wants.

she’s surprisingly elusive and distant about her past. whilst her warmth radiates into every part of her life and other people’s lives, noelle... doesn’t talk about her past, where she’s from, and if the conversation ever veers that way she’s a pro at steering it differently. no one ever thinks anything of it because of how open she seems to be, but truthfully she’s incredibly private, nobody truly knows much about her of worth at all.

she’s pretty emotional (shock) and cries a fairly decent amount. she doesn’t deal well with being shouted at or scolded, but she does well at hiding her tears in those situations and has learned to separate that from when people are genuinely pissed at her. she cries more when people are in pain, are upset, or if someone’s genuinely hurt her.

that’s it

it’s over

thank god

[sidekickhq]

Any WCs recommendations that can be filled by a character’s that 18/19

everything is under the cut !

AJAX FALCONE , our CHARLES MICHAEL DAVIS fc is looking for OTHER GANG MEMBERS connection who looks like UTP who is UTP YEARS OLD you DON’T have to contact prior to applying. ( very very flexible on who these characters are. The one requirement is that they would be members of a mutant street gang, based out of several different large cities. you want jax to be like an older bro? DONE. pal? DONE. wise old man? DONE. literally, i’ll work with your character however, but it just needs to make sense for them to be part of a mutant street gang! )

ANDROMEDA ROSALIE ISLEY-QUINZEL, our LANA CONDOR fc is looking for a GOTHAM FRIEND connection who looks like UTP who is 19-26 YEARS OLD. you DON’T have to contact prior to applying. ( they were both in gotham together at/around the same time! there’s a few ways this could go. they went to dance academy with andy, they were someone who took her under their wing, or just someone right around her age that she became friends with. while andy didn’t partake in the gotham walk of life directly, she didn’t ever judge it or care about it much. she helped, sometimes, too, so this char’s morality is rather open. )

BEATRICE ZSASZ, our EMMY ROSSUM fc is looking for a GOOD INFLUENCE connection who looks like UTP who is ANY AGE. you DON’T have to contact prior to applying at scbotage ( but feel free to do so !! ). ( bea has a lot of bad habits. she’s constantly destroying herself, and yet she survives. like a cockroach. every sort of risky business she can participate in, i assure you she has. she’s done everything in her power to make sure she doesn’t make it past 30. this is someone who tries to steer her away from her self-destructive tendencies. )

ETIENNE BEAUBIER-JINADU, our SUHO fc is looking for a EX FRIENDS / MAX OF FIVE connection who looks like HENRIK HOLM, BARBIE FERREIRA, CODY CHRISTIAN, HASEUL, MAIA COTTON, MADELAINE PETSCH / UP TO PLAYER who is 19-25 you DON’T have to contact prior to applying. ( tw: abusive relationship. this is for the group of friends that etienne cut out of his life when he was dating his now ex-girlfriend. it was an abusive and controlling relationship so his friends could have possibly tried to talk to him about it and he ended up pushing them away until they were gone. i think it would be cool for them to be friends again. he’s put his past behind him and is trying to move forward. ) 

MAGGIE THANOSDOTTIR, our ZOEY DEUTCH fc is looking for a SPACE BEST FRIEND connection who looks like UTP who is 100+. you DON’T have to contact prior to applying. ( maggie spent most of her life in space - she is currently 450 and has only been on midgard for like 1-2 of those years. i would love for her to have someone that she was very close with when she was younger ( 200’s) and have travelled around space with. she’s was a little less morally concious then, so they probably got into some fun but crazy shit. if you want more infor or to talk this plot through more just message me at bby-thanos)

MAKENA THURMAN, our ZOE KRAVITZ fc is looking for her ADULTHOOD SUX SQUAD / THREE - FOUR FRIENDS connection who look like UTP who are ANY AGE. you DON’T have to contact prior to applying. ( you know what’s hard about adulthood? all of it. makena was kinda super shuttled towards having to be a functioning adult when keely came along, but that doesn’t mean she 1. enjoys it and 2. is any good at it. paying bills on time is hard. remembering to renew her internet security is hard. getting regular smear tests? hard. nothing is easy, and this is the group of friends she laments that with. three to four wine mom’s / dad’s / parent’s / people who aren’t parents but who are in or around the same age and having just as much trouble adjusting / etc who met in a doctors office or something and who now get together every week just to drink wine and complain about taxes and anti-vaxxers. )

MORGAN ROTH, our SOFIA CARSON fc is, looking for a BEST FRIEND connection who looks like UTP who is 18 TO 20 you DON’T have to contact prior to applying. ( preferably another tt kid. but they grew up together and have been friends since they were little kids. just ! best friends ! who care about and support each other !)

NIKKI BARTON, our PHOEBE TONKIN fc is looking for a YOUNGER SIBLING FIGURE connection who looks like UP TO PLAYER who is UNDER 21. you DON’T have to contact prior to applying. ( so! i’m into two versions of how this goes, but both of them are down to one thing: nikki has never had a sibling, and with the shitty homelife she’s had… she’s always kind of craved one. she sees something of herself in this character, and that’s where the option is. either they’re sweet and innocent and something to be protected, like she once was… or they’re a demon straight out of the depths of hell, and someone she can see her current self in. nikki will take them under her wing and be a voice of reason, if needed, or a cool older figure who can supply them with booze, if .. also needed. it’s p open cause i’m not too fussy ! )

PERSEUS XAVIER-LEHNSHERR, our NICK ROBINSON fc is looking for an ADHD PAL connection who looks like UTP, who is 17-24 YEARS OLD. you DON’T have to contact prior to applying. ( they’ve been best friends since percy was adopted by the xavier-lehnsherrs at five years old, and have been best friends since. they grew up together. learned how to ride a bike together, snuck out for the first time together, and everything in-between and after the fact. the general polarity of their personalities doesn’t matter, but it’s necessary that they get along. bonus fun if this person doesn’t like will, percy’s s/o. )

PERSEUS XAVIER-LEHNSHERR & WILLIAM WADE WILSON, our NICK ROBINSON & BRANDON FLYNN fcs are looking for a PARTY SQUAD / 4 PEOPLE connection who looks like UTP who is UTP YEARS OLD. you DON’T have to contact prior to applying. ( a party squad !!! yeet. those who go out together stay together. they’re thick as thieves and have been through a lot. they’re totally awful in the fact that they have very little respect for the law. percy + will hav been friends w them for a while + spends a lot of his time w them. check out pinterest @ desiderum/party-squad/ for the board.  ) ( blayze constantine, more )

PERSEUS XAVIER-LEHNSHERR, our NICK ROBINSON fc is looking for a WOMB TO TOMB BEST FRIEND connection who looks like UTP, who is 17-21 YEARS OLD. you DON’T have to contact prior to applying. ( they’ve been best friends since percy was adopted by the xavier-lehnsherrs at five years old, and have been best friends since. they grew up together. learned how to ride a bike together, snuck out for the first time together, and everything in-between and after the fact. the general polarity of their personalities doesn’t matter, but it’s necessary that they get along. bonus fun if this person doesn’t like will, percy’s s/o. )

SELENE CONSTANTINE, our VIRGINIA GARDNER fc, is looking for a MAGIC FRIENDS // TWO TO THREE connection who looks like ANY FACE who is ANY AGE. you DON’T have to contact prior to applying. ( selene’s been around magic their entire life, and they are very comfortable with magic and other magic users. i just want a friend group of people that are all magical or magic-adjacent. they don’t have to be the traditional witch / sorcerers / magicians just… magic-adjacent. )

TEDDY BROCK our TOM HOLLAND fc is looking for a PUNK GANG connection who looks like UTP who is 17-23 YEARS OLD. ? you DON’T have to contact prior to applying. ( it’d be rad to have some kinda cool kid gang who just skip class n chill and listen to records and hate authority (like “cool” kids) kinda like an old biker gang ! ) ( gunnar vidarson, more )

TEDDY BROCK, our TOM HOLLAND fc is looking for a BEST FRIENDS/SECRET CRUSH connection who looks like PLAYER’S CHOICE, ANY GENDER who is 18-20 YEARS OLD. you DON’T have to contact prior to applying. ( just someone they relate to or someone completely different that checks up on them, gets them massively. their symbiote probably loves ur character a lot ?? friends to lovers type bs!!)

VICTORIA CREED, our STELLA MAEVE fc is looking for SOMEONE TO PROTECT who looks like UP TO PLAYER and is ANY AGE / PREFERABLY YOUNGER THAN HER. you DON’T have to contact prior to applying. ( from now and until the end of her life, victoria is gonna be living with what she’s done, and working on making herself better. i like the idea of her coming across someone who’s just… good. the goodness radiates off of them, and they make her think of all the innocent people she’s hurt, and also kind of make her think about the innocent person she could have been, if the world allowed - and maybe they’re not having such a good time of it, or maybe they are and she just wants to make sure that things never sour for them, but either way, she takes it upon herself to be their guardian angel. maybe more accurately. personal attack dog. she works hard to keep them safe and to her that means being willing to lay her life down for them at a moments notice and being equally as willing to take a life for them, too. ) ( isaac howlett & ? )

WINIFRED BANNER-ROSS, our SOPHIE TURNER fc is looking for a CHURCH FRIEND connection who looks like UTP, who is 18-24 OR 25+ YEARS OLD. you DON’T have to contact prior to applying . ( tw: church / catholicism. winnie runs the youth group @ the church near paragon so im. idk just pals from that church. youth group kids, maybe. 18-24 would b youth group ppl, anything older would be other church attendants )

WINIFRED BANNER-ROSS, our SOPHIE TURNER fc is looking for a SHARED / MUTUAL TRAUMA BUDDY connection who looks like UTP, who is UTP YEARS OLD. you DON’T have to contact prior to applying . ( tw: shooting. despite being completely different, they bond over the trauma they’ve suffered after being shot, and ur character helps winnie out quite a bit. their friendship is peculiar, but an essential one for both of them )

ATTICUS ‘KIT’ COULSON , our LUKE PASQUALINO fc is looking for a YOUNGER SIBLING  connection who looks like  LUDOVICA MARTINO, GIORGIA WHIGHAM, NICOLE MAINES, HERMAN TOMMERAAS, LUDOVICO TERSIGNI, OR UTP  who is  16-21 YEARS OLD.  you  DON’T  have to contact prior to applying at. ( kit was all over the place as a teenager, constantly in trouble for partying. growing up, they were always the closest to their twin and probably wasn’t the best older sibling, whereas their twin probably was much closer with the younger sibling. i can see this sibling either trying to get closer to kit, or pushing them further away after their mother and brother died when kit was 18. )

BUCKY BARNES, our SEBASTIAN STAN fc is looking for a BIOLOGICAL SON connection who looks like PLAYER’S CHOICE, who is 17-21. you DON’T have to contact prior to applying. ( honestly just a mini bucky would be amazing )

FABIAN TODD, our BOB MORLEY fc is looking for a BIO SIBLINGS ( 3 ) connection who looks like LIZA SOBERNO, JAMES REID, PARIS BERELC / ANY RELEVANT FC who is 18-25 you DON’T have to contact prior to applying. ( so they’re kids of mario falcone + his wife, though fabian doesn’t know it and doesn’t know they’re siblings because fabian was left in an alley not long after they’re birth. )

ISAAC HOWLETT, our BEN HARDY fc is looking for a YOUNGER SIBLING connection who looks like  PLAYER’S CHOICE, who is 16-18 years old. you DO have to contact prior to applying at FLOWINGELECTRICITYX. ( the two of them would’ve been half siblings, same mother different father. They also would’ve been really close until their mother died. They got separated then, because of Isaac running off and being taken to Xavier’s School. They then would’ve been adopted/taken in by a superhero/villain!)

JEANNIE DRAKE KENT, our STEFANIE SCOTT fc is looking for a HALF SIBLING ( via warren )  connection who looks like ( EMMA DUMONT, ASAMI ZDRENKA, RYAN POTTER ANY ½ WHITE FC ))  who is ( 19-23 YEARS OLD. ) you DON’T have to contact prior to applying. ( half siblings that are known publically to be worthington – nothing is set in stone with this connection but feel free to message at gods lost roomba#5813 to hear more about it!  )

LAURA KINNEY, our MONICA RAYMUND fc is looking for a ADOPTED CHILD ( 2 ) connection who looks like CENGIZ AL, FROY GUTIERREZ, SHAMIR BAILEY, JUDE KARDA, CAMERON BOYCE / UTP who is 16-23 you DON’T have to contact prior to applying. ( so these two, laura took in, probably a few years ago but could’ve been more recently too. they’d be a victim of abuse, underage prostitution, kidnapping or even from an organization similar to weapon x or weapon x itself. just abuse in general because i think it would hit laura hard and she wouldn’t be able to say goodbye to them. laura would’ve rescued them on one of her missions and took them in and eventually legally adopted them. they’re really close, i imagine and laura would kill anything for them. bonus points if they’re trans or nb !!! )

RAYNOR LOKISON, our CODY FERN fc is looking for a ADOPTED CHILD connection who looks like PLAYER’S CHOICE, who is 16-17 YEARS OLD. you CAN have to contact prior to applying at ofrcvenants. ( raynor is a therapist who works with kids/people who have lost someone. Raynor tries to keep a distance from clients, but he got attached to your character and close, and ended up adopting them. )

ROSARIO HILL, our MELISSA BARRERA fc, is looking for a YOUNGER HALF SIBLINGS / ADOPTED SIBLINGS ( 1 to 2 ) connection who looks like DIEGO TINOCO, TRINITY ANNE, EDEN ESTRADA, SOFIA REYES, CIERRA RAMRIEZ, ISSA LISH, DANNA PAOLA, ARIELA BARER, MANPREET MABRA, LAURA HARRIER, TRISTIN MAYS, LULU ANTARISKA, KEKE PALMER, TAZZY PHE, TINA TAMASHIRO, TOMMY MARTINEZ, MARLON LANGELAND / AT LEAST HALF MEXICAN IF BIO, ANY FACE IF ADOPTED who is UNDER 25 you DON’T have to contact prior to applying.

SOFIA STRANGE, our ELIZABETH OLSEN fc is looking for a FULL SIBLING connection who looks like KIERNAN SHIPKA, ALDEN EHRENREICH, EZRA MILLER, UTP who is 18-25. you DON’T have to contact prior to applying. ( they would probs be a sorcerer too? but like a mini army of strange kids would be dope. )

TRIXIE ESPINOZA, our CHRISTIAN SERRATOS fc is looking for her ( TWO ) YOUNGER HALF-SIBLINGS VIA CHLOE & LUCIFER who look like ANY FACE CLAIM / ONLY HAVE TO BE HALF WHITE who are anything from 16-22 YEARS OLD. you DON’T have to contact prior to applying. ( i’m tweaking the timeline that i’m mainly working from - the lucifer tv show - just a bit to allow for a broader age range of siblings, but what i waNT here is !! lil decker-morningstar kids !! i’m not even fussy on whether they’re like, bio or not, i just think… trix would be an awesome big sister, and it would REALLY solidify the fam connection here for there to be a lil fam running abt the place. )

ANDROMEDA ISLEY-QUINZEL, our LANA CONDOR fc is looking for a POLY SHIP / 2 1 CHARS connection who looks like UTP, who is 19-25 YEARS OLD. you DO have to contact prior to applying at SHCOTINGSTAR. ( andy has baggage, certainly. she’s a past weapon x detainee, unbeknownst to her, adopted from a broken family, and had her heart broken by the first person she dated. she’s serial dated for years. but these people, they made her stop & start to appreciate love for what it is again. this connect can be filled by someone of any gender. ) ( half filled by birdie drake-kent )

DANIEL FOSTER-THORSON, our TARJEI SANDVIK MOE fc is looking for a EX BOYFRIEND connection who looks like MIGUEL BERNARDEAU, CHRIS VERES, DYLAN SPRAYBERRY, ANY FC who is 18-21. you DON’T have to contact prior to applying. ( they’d preferably be a kid of another asgardian. someone not related to thor, obviously. he and danny dated when he spent a summer on asgard, and it probably happened directly after he and his first girlfriend broke up. he was exploring his sexuality and they were super cute for as long as they lasted, but it was the briefest fling and when he returned to earth, it ended. now they’re reunited! )

DANIEL FOSTER-THORSON, our TARJEI SANDVIK MOE fc is looking for an EX GIRLFRIEND connection who looks like OLIVIA COOKE, ISABELA MONER, BENEDETTA PORCAROLI, LETITIA WRIGHT, ANY FC who is 18-21. you DON’T have to contact prior to applying. ( the first and only girlfriend danny ever had. they were probably really cute at first and perfectly on track, but as time went on danny’s misgivings grew, and he started to realize that he wasn’t into her in the way he should have been. they could have ended badly or on good terms, and either would be cool by me! )

DEVYN XAVIER-LEHNSHERR, our COURTNEY EATON fc is looking for a SKINNY LOVE connection who looks like PLAYER’S CHOICE, who is 19-22 you DON’T have to contact prior to applying. ( basically, your character and Devyn are in love with each other but neither of them have been able to tell the other. )

HELENA BARNES, our KATHERINE LANGFORD fc, is looking for a EX GIRLFRIEND connection who looks like IMAN MESKINI. INDYA MOORE, ARIELA BARER, NEELAM GILL, ODEYA RUSH, PARIS BERELC, LYDIA GRAHAM, NICOLE MAINES, NATALIE ALYN LIND, LIZA SOBERANO, NATASHA LIU BORDIZZO / UTP who is 18-21 you DON’T have to contact prior to applying at. ( the relationship wouldn’t have been the healthiest uh because helena isn’t the best at emotions other than anger  )

HELENA BARNES, our KATHERINE LANGFORD fc, is looking for a SLOW BURN ROMANCE connection who looks like LYRICA OKANO, NATALIA DYER, ARIELA BARER, LISA TEIGE, PARIS BERELC, HAILEE STEINFELD, LIZA SOBERANO, CINDY KIMBERLY // PLAYER’S CHOICE who is 18-21. you DON’T have to contact prior to applying. ( girls falling in love and working through trauma and being soft ! it’s all i want )

IVAR BRAGISON, our KIM JISOO fc is looking for a MUSE/ROMANTIC PARTNER connection who looks like UTP! who is 18+ YEARS OLD. you DON’T have to contact prior to applying. ( at first, ivar is just drawn to them and wants to know about them, to write about them but the more they get to know each other, the more they romantically bond and like many other muses with their artist, they become lovers. - any gender is ok for this connection )

SERAPHINE CURRY, our MAIA COTTON fc is looking for a LOVE INTEREST connection who looks like ANY FEMALE/FEMALE ALLIGNING NB FC who is 19-23 YEARS OLD. you (DON’T ) have to contact prior to applying at BUT CAN @/SELACHIS. (can also … be apart of the childhood crush wc, but effectively, someone who is a lot more assertive in their emotions, very much the yang to sela’s ying, i would love to have an end game ship but 👉👈 )

TEDDY BROCK, our TOM HOLLAND fc is looking for an EX-SOMETHING connection who looks like ANY MALE FC who is  18-22 YEARS OLD you DON’T have to contact prior to applying. ( teddy is an emo loser who pretends to be all emotionless and punk, it would be nice for them to have someone they can be nerdy and vulnerable around, they maybe even know the symbiote? ? but just someone who he can be soft w !)

TEDDY BROCK, our TOM HOLLAND fc is looking for a FLING/FWB connection who looks like UP TO PLAYER who is # 19-22 YEARS OLD you DON’T have to contact prior to applying. ( honestly something casual and regular ig?? like whenever one of them is bored or stressed they,, hang out. the symbiote means my kid has a lotta…energy so this can be multiple connections, any gender!! ) 

WILLIAM WILSON, our BRANDON FLYNN fc is looking for his EXES connection who look like PLAYERS CHOICE who are 19-23. you DON’T have to contact prior to applying. ( before he got with percy will was sort of all over the place, and he has a lot of exes to prove it. he probably stupidly let quite a few of them think that they were going to be something more before moving on from his flavor of the week, so there’s equal opportunity here for grudges to be held as there is for them both to have moved on. )

AERONWY GWYNN, our VAJEN VAN DEN BOSCH fc is looking for a PARENTS CLUB connection who looks like UTP ! who is ANY AGE you DON’T have to contact prior to applying. ( this is for a group of parents who aren’t necessarily the best parents? they all try super hard but they probably didn’t have the initial instincts people assume parents have. bonus points if they struggle with post partum depression / psychosis like aeron does. )

ANDROMEDA ROSALIE ISLEY-QUINZEL, our LANA CONDOR fc is looking for a LITTLE SIBLING FIGURE connection who looks like UTP+ who is YOUNGER THAN 24 YEARS OLD. you DON’T have to contact prior to applying. ( something about them drew andy in and made her want to protect them. it can be as simple as they’re aura or as intricate as them being the same in some way - similar powers, both adopted, etc. but andy is fiercely protective of this person. she’s not a very scary person, she’s often the one BEING protected, but for them it’s a role reversal, whether they younger of the two likes it or not. )

CASSIE LANG, KATE BISHOP, & NOH-VARR, our HAYLEY KIYOKO, MEDALION RAHIMI, & NICO TORTORELLA fc, is looking for a NEW YOUNG AVENGERS // MAX TWO connection who looks like INDYA MOORE, LYRICA OKANO, ANA DE ARMAS, LISA TEIGE, AMANDLA STENBERG, KARAN BARR, DAVID CASTRO, RJ CYLER, ABIGAIL COWEN, PARIS BERELC, YARA SHAHIDI, IMAN MESKINI // ANY FC THAT WORKS who is 26 & UNDER you DON’T have to contact prior to applying. ( a few months ago, the young avengers got back together! exciting. this is basically a wc for new paragon students that they have welcomed into the young avengers since then. can be an avengers or not, can have a legacy or not, it doesn’t really matter! )

DANIEL FOSTER-THORSON, our TARJEI SANDVIK MOE fc is looking for PEOPLE HE TUTORS connection who looks like PLAYERS CHOICE who are ANY AGE. you DON’T have to contact prior to applying. ( danny is pretty smart, so if your character is slacking at school or something, he can be of assistance! he’s also… pretty easy to walk all over, so this doesn’t have to be such a cut and dry connect if you want someone to play off of your character a bit ) ( gunnar vidarson, more )

DANIEL FOSTER-THORSON, our TARJEI SANDVIK MOE fc is looking for a FORMER BULLY connection who looks like PLAYERS CHOICE who are ANY AGE. you DON’T have to contact prior to applying. ( kids can sometimes be.. not the best. back when they were younger, this character used to pick on danny a bit; it was easily done, but also, you know, not great. danny’s never quite forgiven them and it might be the only grudge he’s ever held, but they’ve kinda. totally forgotten about him. )

ELEKTRA TROY, our JENNA COLEMAN fc is looking for a CLIENT connections who looks like UTP who is ANY AGE you ( DON’T ) have to contact prior to applying. ( elektra is a defense attorney and has probably defended some people in paragon - would love for her to have some clients either present or past! ) 

FLETCHER WEST, our GRANT GUSTIN fc is looking for a PATIENT connection who looks like UTP who is UTP YEARS OLD you DON’T have to contact prior to applying ( young medical resident Fletcher West sees a career for himself in treating/taking care of meta-humans, mutants, mutates, etc. If you gotta problem, yo he’ll solve it) ( kurt rogers, benjamin parker ii, more )

GARFIELD LOGAN , our MANNY JACINTO fc is looking for a YOUTUBE FAN connection who looks like UTP who is 16 - 24 YEARS OLD you ( DON’T ) have to contact prior to applying ( SO Beast Boy has a very popular Youtube channel, because he also is an actor and does voice acting. Ya boy is an entertainer! And hes here at Paragon!! Your muse would be a fan, and we can decide what happens from there! Fun fan bonding times would be something gar is here for. Let him happily influence young people for the better ! )

JOSEPHINE-MARIE JUDE MURDOCK, our MEAGHAN RATH fc, is looking for a STUDENTS connection who looks like UTP who is 16-18 you DON’T have to contact prior to applying. ( have a high schooler that needs to impress a girl and/or colleges? have a high schooler that needs another elective? have a pretentious high schooler? put them in French class. )

JOSEPHINE-MARIE JUDE MURDOCK, our MEAGHAN RATH fc, is looking for a ZOMBIE / BACK FROM THE DEAD CLUB connection who looks like UTP who is ANY AGE. you DON’T. ( not the official name but just people who are friends based on the fact that they all died and came back to life. )

KATE BISHOP, our MEDALION RAHIMI fc, is looking for CLIENTS (MULTIPLE) connection who looks like UTP who are ANY AGE.  you DON’T have to contact prior to applying. ( kate’s a p.i., she investigates things from cheating to crimes to the occasional crime ring, so uh yeah hire this coffee-fueled mess. ) 

KURT ROGERS, our ALPEREN DUYMAZ fc is looking for a CLIENTS connection who looks like UTP who is UTP YEARS OLD. you DON’T have to contact prior to applying. ( if your muse needs to hire a hero who is trying his gosh dang hardest but will probably only produce mediocre results, then kurt is your boi.)

KURT ROGERS, our ALPEREN DUYMAZ fc is looking for a PARTNER/HERO TEAM connection who looks like UTP who is UTP YEARS OLD. you DON’T have to contact prior to applying. ( i just need him to have at least a partner while he’s doing heroics, otherwise the big dummy is going to get himself killed.)

KURT ROGERS, our ALPEREN DUYMAZ fc is looking for a COWORKERS connection who looks like UTP who is UTP YEARS OLD. you DON’T have to contact prior to applying. ( just give me people who work at johnny’s bar and complain about customers with kurt or bother him about his lack of people skills. )

LOGAN, our  HUGH JACKMAN fc is looking for SAVED MUTANTS connections who looks like UTP who is ANY AGE you DONT have to contact prior to applying. ( So we all know Logan has a habit of happening upon small mutant children that have run into some trouble. The details of this are VERY open to each specific muse, but basically Logan found these connections in a tough spot, then probably brought them to Xavier’s (or, more recently, Paragon) for help. ) 

LOGAN, our  HUGH JACKMAN fc is looking for WEAPON X connections who looks like UTP who is ANY AGE you DONT have to contact prior to applying. ( The only requirement of this connection is that the muse was somehow affiliated with Weapon X, and somehow had contact with Logan at some point. Very loose & open, we can decide whether they’re allies or enemies or somewhere in between, and where things go! ) 

LOGAN, our HUGH JACKMAN fc is looking for PEOPLE HE’S HELPED connection who looks like UTP who is ANY AGE you DONT have to contact prior to applying. ( This is vague because there are SO MANY possibilities. Logan has travelled far and wide, and if a major issue comes up somewhere around him and catches his attention? You bet he tried to help somehow. This could range from like…. helping someone escape an abusive partner to stopping a small town from falling into the hands of total corruption. Come at me with your ideas!!! ) 

MAKENA THURMAN, our ZOE KRAVITZ fc is looking for her ACCIDENTAL VICTIM connection who looks like UTP who is ANY AGE. you DON’T have to contact prior to applying. ( though she doesn’t really know it ( she’s always suspected, but there’s no real way for her to check ), makena has some level of probability manipulation, inherited from her mother. for her, this manifested as doing well in tests she didn’t study for, but stressed about until her mutation kicked in, or being unusually good at convincing her parents to allow certain things, or… dot dot dot. a lot of lucky coincidences, if you will, have dotted HER life - but for this character, just being in the vicinity of the girl that doesn’t like them and who they certainly don’t like either ( reasons tbd ) turns their luck sour. she projects onto them unknowingly, twisting their luck and turning it bad - meaning that when they’re around kena, they’re FAR more likely to suffer some pretty horrible happenings. maybe they realize what’s happening, based solely on knowing about her mom. maybe not, and it’s something that needs to be discovered. either way… who’s to say how they’ll solve it?)

MARISOL GRAYSON, our VICTORIA JUSTICE fc is looking for a NEXT GEN TITANS connection who looks like LIZA SOBERANO, TIERA SKOVBYE, OLIVIA HOLT, SHARON ROONEY, ARIA SHAHGHASEMI, ASA BUTTERFIELD, CODY FERN, AUBREY JOSEPH / UP TO PLAYER who is 17+ you DON’T have to contact prior to applying. ( marisol’s dream has always been to be a vigilante and now she is under the mantle of blackbat, which means that she desperately wants to get a team going. they don’t even have to be a kid of a canon yj/tt/titans member and their mantle’s could be completely original! i also see it as everyone being a leader depending on what’s going on and what mission they’re handling. ) 

MORGAN ROTH, our SOFIA CARSON fc, is looking for a INCORRECT PREDICTION connection who looks like ANY FC who is ANY AGE. you DON’T have to contact prior to applying. ( morgan gives out cheap divination readings and sometimes just… gives someone a reading because she is um a lot. she’s mostly correct, but this time ! she was wrong ! just flat out wrong! i imagine it was something comically wrong like ‘you are going to get a promotion at work soon’ and the next day… your muse was fired or smth )

NAOMI DANE-SUMMERS, our NAOMI SCOTT fc is looking for a MINI BROTHERHOOD OF EVIL MUTANTS connection who looks like UTP who is 16-28ISH you DON’T have to contact prior to applying. ( essentially they’re the new age of the brotherhood of evil mutants !! the new generation. )

NIKKI BARTON, our PHOEBE TONKIN fc is looking for a EX-CLIENTS connection who looks like UP TO PLAYER who is ANY AGE you DON’T have to contact prior to applying. ( i’m gonna keep this one a little vague, cause.. i wanna leave it open to multiple people, and i think every single one of those could have a different sort of dynamic with her. nikki used to work as a drugrunner for a major dealer named callum. he was, for want of a better description - an abusive piece of shit, and he continued to be that right up until nikki killed him in self defense. HOWEVER, before he died and she got carted off to jail, nikki used to do a lot of jobs for him, and they led her across states. she would have rubbed shoulders with a lot of not so great people, but also some kinda ok ones. some might have heard what happened, others won’t and might be kinda confused about what the FUCK happened to their supply, but either way.. i want. also. callum coulda had some other helpers. idk. i just want it ALL. ) 

RAMONA DARKHOLME, our MADCHEN AMICK fc is looking for a APPRENTICE connection who looks like UP TO PLAYER and is YOUNGER THAN 30. you DON’T have to contact prior to applying. ( right now, she’s a security guard and mechanic, but over her 53 years, romy has been a lot of things. while i see this as someone who she’s grown quite close to / taken under her wing / been adopted by who’s interested in learning the tricks of the mechanics trade, i’d be willing to talk with anyone on changing that and making what they’re learning from romy into something different! i just think it’d be neat if she had someone who’s almost becoming a child figure, in her eyes, who she can kinda… learn to be softer with, and really practice with in regards to learning how to be a better mother. )

SELENE CONSTANTINE, our VIRGINIA GARDNER fc is looking for a TEAM OF SCAM ARTISTS & THIEVES connection who looks like UTP who is ANY AGE you DON’T have to contact prior to applying. ( think leverage! a close-knit found family who just happen to be crooks and criminals. part robin hood type thing part just for their own gain ) ( manon gwynn, ajax falcone + others ! )

SERAPHINE CURRY, our MAIA COTTON fc is looking for a MUSE connection who looks like ANY FC who is 19-25 YEARS OLD. you (DON’T ) have to contact prior to applying at BUT CAN @/SELACHIS. ( just someone she paints and writes music for all the time. would love. )

SKYLAR MCCOY, our JENNIE KIM fc is looking for a SOMEONE SHE KNEW FROM WHEN SHE WAS WITH VICTOR connection who looks like UTP, who is UTP YEARS OLD. you DON’T have to contact prior to applying. ( she spent eleven years of her life with him. from ages six to seventeen, skylar, or as this muse would have known her, artemis, was under victor creed’s hand, going around the world with him as he worked with the hand - and when she worked with him, eventually. this connection is someone that knew skylar during her time then. who remember her as someone else. artemis, a dying light that only knew how to fight, not how to think. )

THEORA TREVOR, our KATE SIEGEL fc, is looking for a PROTEGE-LIKE connection who looks like UTP who is 16 TO 26. you DON’T have to contact prior to applying. ( This is basically for a character that wants to be a doctor, whatever stage of their education they are in. And while Theora isn’t exactly the traditional mentor type, she took them under her wing. She cares, even if she’s not the best as expressing that. )

TOMMY SHEPHERD MAXIMOFF, our SURAJ SHARMA fc is looking for a GROUP OF FELLOW FORMER INMATES/WEAPON EXPERIMENTS BY THE US GOVERNMENT THAT TOMMY BROKE OUT (unlimited) connection who looks like UTP, who is 16-26. you DON’T (but can) have to contact prior to applying at FEELTHESTXRM/DISCORD. ( basically while the young avengers were broken up Tommy sort of bounced aimlessly around the country from family member to family member until eventually he got tired of feeling useless and decided to start going around to other ““juvies”” (read: lowkey mutant/superhuman testing facilities trying to turn kids and teens into weapons under the guise of being maximum security juvenile detention centers for superhumans) and basically destroying them and freeing everyone along the way. Some of these people ended up joining Tommy on his quest and they ended up forming this sort of, makeshift family especially considering most of them had no family to go back to and that they were all technically escaped felons. Some of them probably left over time to do other stuff, some of them could even be villains now (which would be fun (read: dramatic) since tommy is back with the YA), but they all would still love each other lots and probably be highkey protective of each other. (some of these folks could also end up in part of the new YA, i think that wuld be neato!))

TOVA VIDARSDOTTIR, our EMMA MACKEY fc is looking for COWORKERS connection who looks like ANY FC who are ANY AGE. you DON’T have to contact prior to applying. ( just a small connect for more people who work in the local record store ! tova could do with some people who she can have the typical work dynamic with, and mayb they can even b friends outside of it! )

TRIXIE ESPINOZA, our CHRISTIAN SERRATOS fc is looking for ILLEGAL PATIENTS who look like UP TO PLAYER and are ANY AGE. you DON’T have to contact prior to applying. ( trix is a med student, and she does a lot of work at the local hospital - but i also imagine that over the last few years, she’s sort of made a name for herself in the lowkey sense as someone who’s willing to treat patients out of hours / out of the hospital / etc on the downlow. if your character is a vigilante / hero / villain / etc, who sometimes gets themselves fuckt up and doesn’t want to make the big deal it could be by getting treated officially… hit her up ! she’ll fix you up for free, and she’ll do it discreetly. )

TRIXIE ESPINOZA, our CHRISTIAN SERRATOS fc is looking for MORTUARY COWORKERS who look like UP TO PLAYER and are ANY AGE. you DON’T have to contact prior to applying. ( so !! trixie currently works at the local morgue, and as of right now… i think she’s the only one who does? and i’d love for her to have some coworkers there, cause it’s obviously such a heavy job, and i think… while it doesn’t phase trix, it would still be nice for her to have people who can relate to how TOUGH it can be sometimes, and who she can kind of have developed a little something something with. )

WILLIAM WILSON, our BRANDON FLYNN fc is looking for his ARCH-NEMESIS connection who looks like ANY FC who us ANY AGE. you DON’T have to contact prior to applying. ( wrong place, wrong time, every time, apparently. will isn’t a vigilante by any means, and he definitely gets into a lot of trouble on his own, but he likes to be nosy and that has led to him seemingly foiling this characters plans… quite a few times, now. almost habitually. they probably think of him as the worlds biggest killjoy because he always stops their fun, specifically, unaware that will can be as bad as them usually. )

VICTORIA CREED, our STELLA MAEVE fc is looking for her THERAPIST who looks like UP TO PLAYER and is ANY AGE. you DON’T have to contact prior to applying. ( victoria is just the latest in a line of traumatized students to begin attending the school / living in paragon, but… when i say she’d really benefit from having someone who’s trying to listen and understand and help her… i mean it. they don’t even have to be fully licensed therapists - and part of me kind of loves if it’s just someone doing this out of the goodness of their heart. she’s spent twenty six years being broken down into a shell of an actual human being, and under her “fathers” thumb, she’s never developed any sort of emotional or social or, well, normal skills needed to live, and really suffered every sort of abuse a person could. she certainly has some sort of stockholm syndrome from it all that’s going to be hard to break through, and she just needs someone who’ll listen, and hear her, and then.. offer a shoulder to lean on, or offer words that might help her through. )

VICTORIA CREED, our STELLA MAEVE fc is looking for her TUTOR / ANY NUMBER OF who looks like UP TO PLAYER and is ANY AGE. you DON’T have to contact prior to applying. ( again ! victoria is another in a long line joining the school who doesn’t really have.. any sort of formal education behind her, and while i do think it’s a good idea to have her go down this path, i struggle to see how she’ll make it without having people willing to work with her. she’s smart, and she’ll pick things up quite quickly, but she’s still going to be a difficult sort of student just because she’s never really had to learn things in this kind of setting - people with patience encouraged, but people without would be equally fun )

VICTORIA CREED, our STELLA MAEVE fc is looking for VICTIMS who look like UP TO PLAYER and are ANY AGE. you DON’T have to contact prior to applying. ( twenty six years spent being little more than another weapon in victor creed’s hands means that victoria has… a lot of blood on her hands. i dare say that none of it is blood she wanted to spill, but the fact remains that she never really knew enough torefuse. she’s done a lot of things she’s not proud of, and she’s hurt a lot of people - meaning she’s going to be spending a great deal of her very long life trying, in vain, to make amends in some way. i want for her to encounter people who she’s hurt. either directly, or that… she hurt their family or distant family before alongside victor, and either she recognizes them and seeks them out, or they recognize her and seek her out. give her people who shout and scream about what she’s done, and people who can’t believe she’s being allowed walk around and keep on living. give her people who know she was just another victim of a psychopath, who could maybe give her something she’s never had before - forgiveness - and make her feel a way she’s also… never felt before. give her all sorts of connections under this heading bc i think it’s unrealistic if she has none. ) 

[tsaritsa]

against the run of play

hi @yanumii​ i was ur secret santa this year!!!! u asked for fic, a modern au, and royai: so i went a bit crazy and wrote a 7k multimedia fic extravaganza. i hope u enjoy it, and that u have a safe holiday period into 2k18!!!

you can also read on ao3

“Riza Hawkeye,” she lifted her glass in greeting.

He inclined his head in return and took the chair next to her. “Roy Mustang. What brings you to a charity gig this evening?”

(In which Roy Mustang is a national rugby hero and falls in love with neurotrauma specialist Riza Hawkeye as soon as he lays eyes on her).

He’s been seen out and about in Briggs with internationally-ranked ice-skater Olivier Armstrong, 36.

But rugby royalty Roy Mustang, 28, stepped out solo for his trip to East City last week, and tried to go incognito as he arrived at Bardowick-Lyles station late Thursday afternoon. 

The captain of the Drakes cut a casual look with oversized black shades as he tried to dodge the prying eyes of the afternoon commuters.

Braving the cold in a black winter coat with pearl buttons, Mustang kept it cosy in a light blue jumper and worn black jeans.

He matched his elegant coat with midnight Tom Ford boots, emblazoned with a bold red strap over the foot. 

He stylishly pulled the look together with a tan messenger bag with statement buckle to give off a touch of glamour. 

The sighting comes after a report from the Central Star that the rugby superstar is getting serious with ice-skater Olivier Armstrong, who has just come back from the competition circuit in Drachma. Though there have been no photos of the two together, several sources have reported on their dates. 

Olivier attended his last home game in East City last November. And Mustang headed to Briggs with her where they were both spotted enjoying the sights at Lake Yastreb, well-known in the region for its picturesque views and opportunities to skate on the lake itself.

'Roy and Olivier are definitely dating,' a source tells Central Star. 'They’ve gotten to know each other really well and are very comfortable from one another. 

'Olivier sends Roy music to get his opinion on what she should choreograph her pieces to. It’s more than just a fling.' 'They’ve been dating since early autumn and spend most nights hanging out at his holiday home in northern Central and laying low,' another source told the Central Star. 

'His friends already love her and see how happy she makes him,' it was claimed.

The Drakes face off against Creta this Saturday at the Eastern ‘Cake Tin’ Stadium, in which punters are expecting the professional debut of newly-signed scrum-half, Edward Elric.

Roy Mustang is supposedly single!

While it was previously reported the Rugby Union star was ‘casually dating’ the pretty figure skater Olivier Armstrong, he says he's not worrying about his love life for now (though he did not outright deny that he and Olivier have been seeing!)

He told The Bell:

"It's not that I'm not pursuing love in some sense, but I'm just focusing on the team right now. We have some really exciting games coming up against the new Creta lineup and training has been non-stop. The spare time that I do have, I want it to be fun and casual and light and easy-going."

Well, there's nothing wrong with fun and casual!

Anyway, Roy isn't worrying about being in a serious relationship at the moment, but maybe some time in the future:

"I'm sure there will come a time when I'm ready to make a more serious commitment and be in a relationship like that – one where I can really focus my time on someone else – but I'm thrilled to be able to keep things simple at the moment."

And for now he's focusing on his fellow teammate (and self-proclaimed best friend) Maes Hughes' happiness in his engagement to Gracia Barker:

"I was really excited and anxious to hear from Maes on the day that I knew he was going to pop the question. When I finally did, it was just the best. I think they’ve found their other half in each other and it's wonderful to see them so happy. It's rare in a lot of cases and when you see it happen it brings you an overwhelming sense of joy."

Aww!

Roy can live vicariously through them AND still enjoy the single life!

Riza huffed as she adjusted the dress she wore, cursing under her breath as she shot a pained smile towards her grandfather across the dance floor. She understood that the job her grandfather had – as the leader of their country – was important, but he made it very hard for her to appreciate his role when he forced her to attend these soirées as his informal date. You’ll meet plenty of men this way, he had cajoled her, eyes twinkling.

Of course, it didn’t matter to Führer George Grumman the III that his only grandchild had no current plans to meet a man and settle down – she was having plenty of fun focusing on her job as a doctor in a small borough just an hour out of Central City. It was challenging work, as well as rewarding, and it frustrated Riza to no end that her grandfather refused to see her as she was, rather than as someone she could potentially become.

She would, however, give him credit for the dress she was trying to wrestle with discreetly as she could manage. Despite the awkward way she felt it sat on her body, she would admit that she looked damn good in it. It was one of the more scandalous-worthy dresses on show tonight – she had been approached by an up-and-coming designer who knew her through a co-worker that worked on the surgery side of head trauma (she thought it was funny how small the world could be at times) – and the designer had arrived last week with this hip-hugging, gossamer affair. Truthfully, the dress actually stopped at the top of her thighs: the rest was a delicate gauze embellished with floral appliqués that accented the long length of her thighs and calves. It was a bold choice that Riza knew had some of the high society girls fuming – technically she hadn’t broken the dress code, but she knew she was walking on a very thin line between looking chic and modern and looking downright scandalous.

Whatever. If she had to be dragged to be paraded around on her grandfather’s arm, at least she could look stunning while doing it.

Tonight was a charity event – these were par for the course for her. The causes were almost always something she could easily support, and the press tended to be minimal (and generally only the legitimate forms of press would even turn up to these sorts of events).

Unfortunately for Riza, this particular charity event was something she was struggling to find an ounce of support for. It didn’t help that their supporters and partners had hadn’t really given much thought to the security of the whole event. Gate crashers kept seeming to wriggle their way in, and the few men on duty had their hands full trying to ensure than nobody was unduly accosted.

It was just her luck that the entire Drakes team had been invited to attend, and with them, every person with a smartphone and a nametag saying, ‘Hello I’m an invasive journalist’ had turned up to report (intrusively investigate, a little voice in the back of her head whispered).

The main speeches that had practically bordered on self-congratulation had already been done (thank god), and the dinner had been alright (the only saving grace). The mingling afterwards was what she didn’t enjoy, but it was barely ten o’clock yet and she had promised her grandfather that she would stay until at least half past. This event had been sponsored by the national rugby board, celebrating the commencement of a new initiative that would see coaches and equipment being deployed to the poorer regions of the country. If her grandfather was considered the head of this nation, rugby was undoubtedly the heart. And the lungs. And the kidneys. And any other vital organ in the body. Amestris without rugby was…well, a country of little international standing and an awful lot of sheep per capita.

It was in their blood, or so the saying went. Everyone either played or watched the national sport. There was never any discussion about disliking rugby: naturally, that never factored into the equation at all. Riza could remember playing it as a young child – even the other sports made available at her school all paled in comparison to the funding and exposure that rugby got.

Her grandfather knew she wasn’t the biggest fan of rugby – being a neurotrauma specialist meant she often dealt with people suffering from concussions and other injuries that were common in the sport: so spending an evening with the people who actively ignored any warnings she and her colleagues put out about the inherent dangers of such an oft-contact sport was just peachy.

Also, Roy Mustang was here. Riza didn’t have anything against the man personally; she was just sick of seeing his name and face plastered across her newspapers, social media feed, christ – even her bread wasn’t safe from his smarmy expression, endorsing her use of wholegrains and encouraging her to learn more at playrugby.co.am

The overexposure of such a man was to be expected, she supposed. He was the captain of the Drakes – the national rugby team, and played in the local league for the East Eagles. Alongside Hughes, Armstrong (the male one, his older sister did figure-skating and was reputed to be as cold as the ice she worked on) and the up-and-coming Elric Brothers, the national team was formidable, to say the least – and that was only the names that she could remember off the top of her head. The Drakes were currently ranked number one in the world, and for good reason. She’d give him this, Mustang was talented – after years of embarrassing defeats and almost-wins against Creta (their arch rivals), Mustang had swanned onto the scene and essentially rebuilt the team from the ground up. The drinking and bashing tabloids went away, the team practically became good at rugby overnight, and the country’s morale was at an all-time high.

Mustang had given the country something to be proud of, and that in turn made the country better for it.

She spied him across the room, talking with her grandfather and other men in suits. George was a big fan of the rugby, and Riza knew her grandfather would certainly be enjoying himself tonight, surrounded by plenty of players to natter off to. She remembered that he used to play when he was haler and heartier: tonight would probably be the highlight of his social engagement calendar for this season.

It was rather funny to watch the man try to extract himself from what looked to be a very one-sided conversation with her grandfather – Riza was well-versed in various modes of escape from him once he got into an animated discussion, but in this case Mustang seemed to be at her grandfather’s mercy. Eventually another team member had wandered over and she saw him quickly duck his way out, skirting the edges of the ballroom.

“I see you’ve met the ‘real’ Führer,” she called out to him as he passed her table. He turned back to look at her, confused.

She smiled kindly at him and his face lit up in understanding. “You saw that, then?”

“It’s been fun watching everyone realise what they’ve gotten themselves into. You did remarkably well.”

She poured herself another flute of sparkling wine and raised her eyebrows at her companion.

“Riza Hawkeye,” she lifted her glass in greeting.

He inclined his head in return and took the chair next to her. “Roy Mustang. What brings you to a charity gig this evening?”

“I’m here as my grandfather’s date,” she replied. It was the truth, after all. But with men like Mustang, she relied on their own fame and notoriety to eclipse hers. There had been no spark of recognition at her first name (which usually gave it away). It was refreshing to be a simple civilian, talking to another, slightly more (okay, extremely well-known) civilian. Besides, she was interested in seeing how he was off the field, and out of the press scrum after every game. He had always presented himself as polite and engaged – but here, amongst his peers, Riza would have an opportunity to see the real man.

“That’s very kind of you,” he said politely, fiddling with the stem of his glass. “Is he involved with the board?”

“Not quite,” she hedged, ducking her head. “To be honest he’s not a very important person in the scheme of it all, not here certainly. Not like you, however.” A teasing smile pulled at her lips. “You’re the man of the hour.”

Roy sighed, shifting in his chair to see her properly. “It’s a good venture.”

“I never said it wasn’t,” Riza said coolly. “But you don’t look like you’re having fun, despite all the attention.”

Roy folded his arms over his chest and Riza tried to ignore how his dress shirt pulled in all the right places. “You don’t sound like you’re having much fun either.”

“Why would I? Your board never listens to me: being stuck in a room with them is not my idea of a good Thursday night.”

He paused, frowning. “What do you mean about the board?”

Perhaps it was the all the wine she had drunk throughout the night (well, something needed to get her through their inane speeches); perhaps it was the fact that she would be able to give Mustang the slip in just under ten minutes; perhaps Riza had the slim hope that maybe he would listen to her, even if nobody else would.

The words spilled out of her before she could think to what impact they might have. “I’m a neurotrauma specialist. I’ve written entire books on how a blow to the head affects your cognitive function later on in life. Your board seems to think their players are immune to those effects.”

His eyes bugged a little out of his head and Riza allowed herself a small smirk. It wasn’t an attack on him directly – hell, he would probably be one of the worst-off players considering how long he’d been playing for the Drakes now – but there was something perversely fun about educating the star of rugby about its inherent failings and dangers.

“I mean-” he was struggling for words here, moving forward in his seat. “I’d heard the rumours but – surely they would listen, at the very least?”

Riza shrugged, finishing off her glass. “You tell me. Every paper I send them – internationally peer-reviewed, mind you – is quickly ignored. They don’t want the proof that the current form of the game is slowly killing their star players.”

“That’s ridiculous.”

“Maybe you’ll have more luck with them than I do. I mean the game no disrespect, but with how it’s embedded into our day-today-lives-” she waved an arm around for emphasis. “It’s not just retired players and people with over twenty concussions. I’m getting children in now because they’ve have a hard knock and it’s screwed them up. There’s absolutely no focus on safety, just on how manly it is. And a gala like this? It’s only going to exacerbate the problem.”

He had grown quiet, looking at something over her shoulder with apprehension.

“I heard from your grandfather that you had come along with him tonight, but I never imagined you would be so rude as to spread lies when you’re here as our guest,” an oily voice said from behind her.

“Chairman Raven,” Roy said carefully, moving out of his chair and shaking the older man’s hand.

Riza stood up to, and made a point of extending her hand towards the man as well. His cologne was overpowering as he gripped her hand with more force than necessary, she could feel it settling onto her skin like the sardines her grandfather liked to eat for lunch. Everything about him screamed money and power.

“It’s hardly a lie, I’m afraid,” she replied coolly, enjoying how his gaze hardened. “I have nearly eight years’ worth of data now. Every year you ignore me I just add to my statistics some more.”

“Chairman, I think it might be worth looking into this,” Roy said earnestly, and Riza felt a rush of affection for him as he stood next to her, their shoulders barely brushing. “I saw Basque only just last week and he had been telling me-”

“A conversation for another time, I think,” Raven said pointedly, still looking at Riza with barely contained distaste. “You’ll have to forgive Mr. Mustang: he sees a pretty face and simply loses all common sense.”

Riza felt the smile freeze on her face. Roy had grown very still next to her, and she willed for him to say something – anything. The silence stretched on, and Raven’s lewd smile grew.

“I think we should give Mr. Mustang more credit than that,” she said eventually, tasting bile on her tongue. “At least he doesn’t judge at first glance.”

“Because there’s so much to judge the granddaughter of the Führer on, isn’t there?” Raven inclined his head at the two of them. “It was nice talking to you again, Miss Hawkeye.”

“Doctor Hawkeye,” she ground out.

Raven laughed loudly. “Of course, silly me. Doctor Hawkeye.”

Roy turned on her as soon as the older man was out of earshot; Riza let go of a breath she didn’t realise she was still holding onto.

“You’re George’s granddaughter?”

“Yes,” she said distractedly, checking her watch for the time. “My grandmother doesn’t have the patience for these sorts of things, so I come along instead.”

“His granddaughter-”

“I need a drink,” she said tiredly, finally looking up at him. His mouth was gaping open inelegantly and she smiled softly, placing her fingers on his underside of his chin to close his mouth gently. “Would you care to join me? I find Chairman Raven robs me of all energy.” Her fingers lingered on his jaw for a moment, savouring the heat of his skin against her own.

He stared at her, confused, before nodding and offering her his arm. “I know a good bar a few blocks from here,” he said lightly.

“You read my mind, Mr Mustang. Lead the way.”

She woke with a start, and immediately wished she hadn’t moved so quickly. The room swam; her vision swam; her head swam.

Riza had the worst hangover in living memory. Her legs were wrapped awkwardly around a sheet and she struggled for a few moments before flopping back onto the bed, breathing deeply and trying her best not to hurl onto the ground.

How much did I drink last night? Her head was throbbing painfully now, and she realised with growing dread that she didn’t recognise where she was.

She also wasn’t wearing anything.

FuckfuckfuckfuckfuckfuckfuckfuckityfuckfuckFUCK.

Another wave of nausea passed over her and she rolled onto her side, blearily opening her eyes to figure out exactly where she had ended up. The room was familiar – maybe one of the hotels in the CBD? The room was pretty basic in its setup, but the furniture spoke of moderate wealth. Riza sat up slowly, not caring how the bedsheet fell and pooled around her hips. She could spy her dress crumpled up on the floor, and her shoes kicked off on the sofa.

How in the fuck am I going to get out of this?

She heard movements to her left, and watched with horror as Roy Mustang’s head emerged from beneath the other half of the bedsheet, like the birth of the world’s most hungover butterfly. He blinked slowly up at her, his mouth opening and shutting.

“Where did your dress go?” he asked, puzzled. Riza shrieked, quickly grabbing the sheet back up.

“God, not so loud I beg you-”

“What the fuck happened last night-”

“Did we-?”

“I think we-”

“Christ, I would never mean to take advantage of you like that, I’m so sorry-”

She held up a hand and took a deep breath. “We were both obviously drunk – it’s – it’s not ideal. But it’s alright, it – this shit happens.” She gripped the bedsheet tightly against her chest.

He curled around a pillow and looked at her with an expression she couldn’t be bothered to figure out. “I’m glad it was you,” he said honestly, wincing at how tactless he sounded. “I mean – you know, people throwing themselves at you for your fame?”

“Yeah…” she nodded her head uncertainly. “I-”

“ROY!” A voice boomed from outside, the two of them tensed, and looked at each other warily.

“Fuck, it’s Maes,” he whispered harshly, running a hand through his hair – if it was his bedhead before, Riza didn’t know what to call whatever the mess was now on top of his head. He pushed himself off the bed and puttered around the bed; Riza found it hard to tear her eyes away from his body. Yes, she knew he was fit but – it was different seeing it in the flesh.

“You won’t want to wear that out,” he said, gesturing to her dress on the floor while shimmying on his boxer shorts. “I think I have some spare clothes you can borrow.”

“It’ll be fine-”

“Dressed to the nines?” He laughed and shook his head. “We’ve got press with us at the moment – they might be sport-focused, but I’ll wager they’ll be quicker to pick up on who you are than I was.”

She bit her lip: he had a point, despite her apprehension. Of course the media would be here – it was a bloody miracle that Roy had taken them to a little bar off a side street where nobody seemed to care who they were.

The knocking on the door was becoming more insistent. “ROY WAKE THE FUCK UP YOU LAZY SON OF A-”

“I’M COMING, MAES!” He yelled back, throwing her a wrinkled t-shirt and shorts; she quickly put them on. They were a loose fit, but it would have to do, at least until she could hail an uber to take her home. He ducked into the bathroom, she could hear the taps running at full tilt.

She was just bending down to pick up her wallet when the door suddenly flew open and Maes walked in, looking harried and ready to draw blood.

“Roy, I swear on my grave you are gonna get it-”

He stopped as he saw Riza crouching by the side of the bed.

“Oh shit, Roy. What have you done?”

Roy walked out the bathroom, scrubbing at his face with a washcloth. His shoulders slumped as he saw his best friend, and he walked over to where Riza was standing, frozen like a deer in the headlights. “Look, I’ll-”

“It’s fine,” she whispered lowly, very aware of how this must look to the deputy captain: here was the Führer’s granddaughter dressed in his best friend’s clothing and looking thoroughly shagged. “I’ll go, and you can – can deal with whatever is going on-”

“Riza-”

She placed her free palm against his chest and breathed in deeply. “It’s fine-”

He dipped his head and kissed her chastely on the mouth, a little part of her melted at the fact that despite his being needed elsewhere, he was still here, with her. His fingers curled against the side of her face and she tried her best not to see too much into this: he was just being a gentleman and –

“Roy this can’t wait-”

He ripped his lips from hers and breathed deeply, resting his forehead against her own.

“I swear-”

She nodded, trying her best not to let her emotions get the better of her. “Maybe we’ll – later.”

“Later,” he breathed, kissing her forehead lightly before picking up her shoes and handing them to her. “Take the stairwell, it’ll lead you to the back entrance and away from the main road.”

Maes was quiet as he watched her gather her purse and slip out of the room. “You didn’t answer your phone,” he explained, handing his own over. The local news site was loaded, and Roy sucked in a breath as he read the headline.

BREAKING: ZOLF J. KIMBLEE FOUND GUILTY OF DOPING DRAKES ON BEHALF OF DRACHMAN BEARS. MORE TO FOLLOW.

“Christ,” Roy muttered, skimming the article before handing the phone back to Maes, quickly putting on his team jacket. “Of course it was Kimblee.”

Maes shrugged. “We all knew something was coming. What I’m more interested in is-”

“Absolutely not.” His voice brokered no argument and Maes deflated a little. “It’s not – we’ve got more important things to worry about right now.”

“Is she just a one-off or-?”

Roy rubbed his eyes roughly, sighing. “For fucks sake, you know me better than that. Later mate, when I’m not hungover.”

Maes slung his arm around Roy’s shoulders, and coaxed him down the hall towards the elevator. “I’ll hold you to that. Anyway, Kimblee was found with the drugs in his room, and his phone’s been confiscated by the police. All you need to do is look solemn and refuse to answer any questions.”

“That should be easy.”

UNKNOWN NUMBER, 5:28pm when did u manage to put ur number into my phone

elizabeth, 5:31pm Sorry, who is this?

UNKNOWN NUMBER, 5:32pm man this is embarrassing UNKNOWN NUMBER, 5:32pm it’s roy UNKNOWN NUMBER, 5:32pm y’know UNKNOWN NUMBER, 5:33pm the dude u marked to hell and back UNKNOWN NUMBER, 5:33pm i had to fend off so many questions from maes about u

elizabeth, 5:34pm Oh shit elizabeth, 5:36pm Thank you for sending back my dress. I owe you

concussion boy, 5:37pm go out to lunch with me tomorrow and i’ll call it even

elizabeth, 5:39pm They said you were slick on the field

concussion boy, 5:40pm meet u at the café on the corner of elm and lyles? 12ish?

elizabeth, 5:44pm I’ve got a meeting at 1pm back at the hospital so it’ll have to be a short lunch

Looks like Roy Mustang scores on AND off the field!

On Saturday, the Drakes star was snapped out and about with the gorgeous First Granddaughter Riza Hawkeye, and it seems like these two had quite a ball on their lunch date!

The precious pair hit up Il Pomadoro in the Carlston borough of Western Central, and they were totally getting their flirt on after the meal!

The accomplished neurosurgeon and the captain of the Drakes were caught on camera smiling and laughing, and Riza even tried to grab for something in the athlete's hands!

And close sources say this isn't just a hit-it-and-quit-it date! Insiders say that these two are, in fact, dating, but it's still very new, which is why they're trying to keep it on the down-low.

For example, when the sports star was asked about being spotted on the outing later that week, he responded by saying:

"I’ve got no idea what you’re talking about."

Playing coy, Mr. Mustang?!

We appreciate the effort, but those snaps are pretty telling!

[Images courtesy of Lily Marrell.]

Things are heating up between Roy Mustang and Riza Hawkeye in the cold winter weather… literally!

On Tuesday night, the blonde beauty and the charismatic captain were spotted hanging out together once again! The stars were caught on camera at a Starbucks near Mount Kahma, about five hours north of New Optain.

Since the cosy ski resort is probably one of the few places in the Eastern District that actually gets cold, the precious pair was most likely trying to get their body heat rising… with some coffee! LOL get your mind out of the gutter!

The romance rumours surrounding these two have been in a flurry ever since the pair were spotted talking at a charity ball sponsored by the National Rugby Union. Miss Hawkeye, a talented neurotrauma specialist at Central General had apparently charmed the Drakes Captain with not just her enviable fashion sense, but her brain as well. Sources say that Roy was smitten with her from the very beginning, while Riza took a little time to warm up to the fly-half.

Do you think the relationship between this dynamic duo is more than platonic? Or are Roy and Riza just friends? This girl hopes that Roy Mustang isn’t off the bachelor market just yet!

[Image courtesy of Lorne Yoki.]

It’s heartbreak on top of heartbreak for Olivier Armstrong, 36, and Roy Mustang, 28, and sources claim to The Daily Star that Roy has betrayed Olivier by seeing another woman for the past five months. ‘Roy finally admitted to Olivier that he had fallen in love with another woman! They had to hide their feelings, but they’ve been seeing each other on the sly whenever they could over the last five months,’ an insider reveals. ‘Their friendship turned into something more as time went on.’ OMG!

So who is this alleged mystery woman? None other than the granddaughter of the Führer, Riza Hawkeye. ‘She’s a neurotrauma specialist, and often attends charity events as a date to her grandfather,’ the source adds. Sounds like they run in the same circles. ‘As such, they had crossed paths at numerous events, both in Amestris and abroad, for some time,’ the insider reveals. ‘She’s classically beautiful and was educated in Creta, as well as here at Central U — and the attraction between her and Roy was immediate!’ Whoa, sounds pretty serious.

Miss Hawkeye has been described as somewhat of a gold-digger in certain circles – she was largely left out of the public eye as George Grumman soared to power in the election of ’19, and the insider reveals that there’s talk amongst those closest to the rugby star that she’s after a ring to solidify her social standing amongst the WAG’s of the Drakes. ‘She grew up in a very poor household until her grandfather took her under his wing, so she’s very hungry for any kind of power. We honestly can’t see what he sees in her.’

Of course, Roy had to eventually tell Olivier about his secret love. ‘Roy finally came clean to Olivier about his new woman just a few days before her Grand Prix competition at North City,’ the insider says, referring to that dramatic and shocking exit by Olivier in the semi-finals. ‘At first Olivier was stunned — and certainly blindsided — by Roy’s confession. But then she got furious. It wasn’t pretty,’ the source shares. We can only imagine. Olivier is considered one of the strongest skaters in the world – she must have truly been heartbroken to be affected like this.

Perhaps Riza will see her true influence now – not as a doctor saving lives, but as one ruining them too.

concussion boy, 2:31pm i know u saw the daily star article. rebecca dm’ed me. concussion boy, 2:31pm u can’t just keep ignoring me concussion boy, 2:32pm we need to talk about this

elizabeth, 2:26pm there’s nothing to talk about

concussion boy, 2:27pm i’ll make sure i get a concussion next match unless we talk concussion boy, 2:27pm u know i will concussion boy, 2:28pm and then u will have to treat me and be a professional while i ogle u concussion boy, 2:29pm har har

“You never thought to tell me it was a PR relationship?”

“It didn’t seem – I mean, if you had met Olivier-”

Riza let out a shriek of frustration. “But I haven’t, Roy. I don’t move in the same circles as you! Was it her? Did she tell them to write this?”

Roy held up his hands in defeat. “No, she wouldn’t. She doesn’t get revenge that way. I just – I know our lives have been busy! Between you, and getting the team through this fucking doping scandal-”

She narrowed her eyes at him. “Because I’m such a hassle, aren’t I? You know that’s not what I meant. It’s not like I’m deciding to date the next guy I meet in the bakery – you’re Roy Mustang! Every man, woman and unborn child knows who you are. It was foolish to think that we’d be able to keep it quiet for any length of time, you’ve always got media after you-”

Roy snorted, shaking his head. “And you’re the Führer’s granddaughter, who is known in the public eye-”

“Because he asks me!” She wrung her hands, trying her best not to get upset. “He always gives me the option to say no! You never asked me if this is what I wanted, you just took me out on a date and hoped like mad the press wouldn’t catch wind-”

“Didn’t stop you from fucking me in the hotel.”

She stood there, mouth open and gaping like a fish. “That’s not – you can’t just – we-”

He laughed humourlessly, a pale imitation of a smile on his face. “Right. I see how it is. You’re allowed to hang that over my head for as much as you care to do, but as soon as I try to make a point you won’t even fucking listen. Are you sure that it’s me who’s has the multiple head injuries?” It was an a needlessly cruel jab and part of Roy regretted it the moment it left his mouth. His idea of a ‘mild press day’ was probably far beyond whatever she had experienced – but still –

She sat down on the sofa, her head in her hands. Her shoulders were trembling. “Don’t,” she said forcefully when he went to sit next to her, her arm flung out in a final stand.

There was an ugly silence as Roy stood there, hand hovering in the space where her own was being held. She swallowed what sounded like a sob before she raised her head and tucked her arms against her body, blinking her watery eyes.

“Never use my job against me again,” she said coldly, before shifting on the sofa, inclining her head slightly. He sat down, and she sighed, resting her head against his shoulder.

“You’re used to the press,” her hand found his and she laced her fingers with his tightly. “You’re used to how they write about you, how they-”

“But-”

“Please let me finish, Roy.” Her voice was firm, but tired. “You have an entire team of people who coach you in how to deal with the media; that same team protects you from the worst of it. I don’t have that luxury. Being the granddaughter of the Führer means that people are aware of me, yes – but I’m no more than a line in an article; perhaps included in a single society photo with my grandfather because he wants one of the two of us. No more than that.” She paused, and shifted against him.

“I have complete strangers approaching me at my work. Making up fake head injuries so I’ll see them – taking up a spot that could be used by somebody who actually needs the medical attention. The girlfriend of Roy Mustang.” Riza laughed bitterly. “It’s like I’m in zoo or something. Back when people saw me for who my grandfather was, not for my own achievements. I worked hard to get to where I am today – to be reduced in such a way, it’s–”

She sighed heavily. “This is the reality I’m living with. Please understand that.”

Roy nodded slowly, squeezing her hand lightly. “I didn’t consider,” he said quietly. “I’m sorry I put you in that position.”

She lifted their joined hands and kissed his knuckles delicately. “I’m sorry I didn’t tell you when it happened. I just…I thought I could deal with it. They’re only articles.”

“And you’re just a person,” Roy soothed. “A brilliant, smart, and kind person-” she laughed shakily, “-but a person nonetheless. I’ll see what I can do about the tabloids. They weren’t this harsh on Gracia.”

dickhead bf, 09:28am sorry to inform u but i’m breaking up with u dickhead bf, 09:29am i know this will be hard for u dickhead bf, 09:29am i'll send some flowers so the world knows i’m a gentleman

ice monster, 09:40am fuck off ice monster, 09:40am i’ve seen the articles. is she staying for longer than 2 months?

dickhead bf, 09:48am har bloody har. she just doesn’t want any press cooking up a story we all know to be fake dickhead bf, 09:50am they haven’t been kind to her

ice monster, 09:52am cry me a river mustang. she knows what’s she’s getting into right? fuhrer’s grandkid and all that ice monster, 09:54am seriously tho, congrats. didn't think there was anybody who could deal with ur arse 24/7. wish her luck from me

dickhead bf, 09:55am you’d probably like her. doesn't put up with any of my shit and makes me ring my mum once a week

ice monster, 09:56am real wife material there ice monster, 10:11am oh ffs DO NOT propose to her yet otherwise i’ll get stuck with ur press cycle again. ur meant to make me look GOOD

dickhead bf, 10:28am i know. say hi to jon for me

Olivier Armstrong may have a new man her life!

On Monday, it was reported by The Standard that the renowned figure skater has been spending time with Jonathon Buccaneer for the last few weeks. AH-Mazing!

However, the 32-year-old's family have declined to comment on her possibly changed #RelationshipStatus. Well, that's not a no!

According to the paper, the twosome went on a romantic getaway together to Beaumont, Western District where they supposedly went on scenic hikes into the mountains and basked in the sunshine. Too cute!

Still, we have to wonder, who exactly is this mystery beau?? Ch-ch-check out these five fast facts on Olivier’s (possible) new squeeze!

Mr. Buccaneer has an automail arm: Apparently, he has a variety of different get-ups for different jobs. It’s unknown how he lost it, and no sources close to the man have offered up any hints. We can’t imagine how he lost it, what with working in the military and all…

He has NOTHING to do with professional sports: Surprisingly, Olivier is dating a normal guy who works at as a military analyst for the Briggs outpost for the military. Mind blown!

Olivier’s rumoured BF is SUPER smart: The 35-year-old is said to have gone to not one, but TWO ranked universities. Yep, Jon went to the University of Amestris for his undergraduate education and also attended Briggs Military Academy. Remember, the blonde beauty graduated from Central U herself!

This possible boyfriend is ALSO a fan of nature: Reportedly, his now private Instagram account showed a series of pics of Jon being in the great outdoors, hiking, and camping in the Northern Ranges. Colour us impressed!

Jon may be exactly what Olivier needs to finally move on from her supposed ex: the athlete was said to be heartbroken following the news that rugby player Roy Mustang had given her the slip and moved onto the granddaughter of the Führer, Riza Hawkeye.

Maybe now Olivier feels ready to be happy with someone new. Is that someone Jon?

“Are you sure you want to do this?” Rebecca asked worriedly, glancing around the now deserted gangway of the stadium: the cheers were muffled, but still echoed hollowly against the cool concrete. “Like follow your heart and all that shit but it’s not gonna be a decision you can just turn your back on-”

“I know ‘Becca,” Riza replied quietly, toying with the shirt in her hands: the deep blue fabric slid easily over her fingers, the flecks of silver embroidery glinted back at her merrily. “But…I’ve got to meet him halfway, don’t I?”

Rebecca snorted. “This is more than halfway. Halfway is following his actual twitter handle instead of the spoof one – you do know it’s a spoof right? It’s important to me that you know it’s a spoof account-” Riza didn’t respond, watching one of the nearby television screens with interest as the Drakes began to run out onto the field.

Rebecca’s cheeks puffed out as she waved a hand in front of her friend’s dazed face. “This is like…eighty-five percent from you and only fifteen from him. He’s playing a game anyway – he’s not gonna see you until the second half at least with where we’re sitting!”

“That’s the point, ‘Becca. I do not want to be blamed for his fucking up of a conversion.”

Rebecca sighed dramatically, rolling her eyes. “It’s Drachma, Riza. They’re not gonna lose.”

“And I am not going to take any chances,” Riza replied primly, quickly putting on the shirt over the top of her singlet. It was a little baggy, but the fact that she was even able to have one – she’d have to think of something to give to Hughes to say thank you; the man was surprisingly cunning and determined. She never stood a chance of getting out of this anyway. She smoothed down the fabric and spun on her foot. “How does it look?”

“Like the cheesiest gesture since that nineteen-page spread of Hughes’ kid.” She fixed her friend with a hard stare. “You have thought about this? Like I’m not trying to jump the gun or anything here but if you guys get married or have a kid-”

“Yes, I have,” she answered irritably. “We’ve talked about how we move forward. I know the press is never going to go away but…it would be nice to give them something positive to spin. This entire week has just been about how I broke Olivier’s heart by stealing Roy away and-” she bit her lip and smiled weakly at her friend. “I need to show that I’m serious about this too.”

“This is the best way?”

“Hughes reckons it is. The press seems to like him, I’ve got no reason to suspect he’d prank his best friend quite so publicly.”

“Alrighty,” Rebecca said with an air of finality, gesturing to gate 28. “Are you ready to face the music?”

Riza nodded. “Let’s go.”

It’s official! And in the sweetest way imaginable.

The Drakes may have had their best win against the Drachman Bears yet (74-6), but nobody is going to be talking about that (not even about the Drachman doping scandal), not after Roy Mustang’s reaction to seeing his now-confirmed girlfriend Riza Hawkeye wearing his rugby number to the game last night.

It wasn’t until after the final whistle had blown that Roy had noticed her, sitting in the front row alongside friends, insiders say. As they were congratulating their opponents, running back Maes Hughes had quickly caught up to his friend on the field, motioning to where the Führer’s granddaughter was watching. Obviously someone had been paying attention to more than just the game!

Roy was meant to be making his way over to be interviewed post-game – as Captain, it’s his job to represent the team immediately in the aftermath. Not last night though!

Instead, he made his way over to where Riza was sitting and jumped the billboard boundaries with ease, motioning at the nearest security guard to open the gate to where the seating was. Riza was quickly pushed out of her seat by an alleged friend and all but fell into her beau’s arms onto the pitch proper, smiling widely from ear to ear before Roy kissed her soundly on the mouth.

If the cheers from the stadium crowd were anything to go by, Central City appears to back this couple too!

A love story like this comes once in a lifetime – let’s hope it goes the distance!

[Watch the video 1:32m]

fin

the spoof account is a reference to holy musical b@man – “someone already took the twitter name ‘roymustang’ and all they do is tweet about how dumb i am.”

three guesses to who owns that account (and no, it’s not hughes)

[jesse-is-inarguably-purple]

yooooo, question #7 for every character you've got c ;

Every? EVERY??? DO YOU HAVE ANY FUCKING IDEA???? H O W F U C K I N G M A N Y ? ? ? ? ?

7. What triggers nostalgia for them, most often? Do they enjoy that feeling?Ok I admit that’s a Good One. I’m gonna go through and find the most relevant ones of the active kids.

RiaOh, so much shit. Half of her chapters are just her whining about her childhood because she saw a fucking bicycle or some shit. External triggers can bring up shit for her—mostly city ambiance (car exhaust, bustling people, car horns and yelling and crowds), and sometimes children/siblings/happy-looking families. But mostly for Ria it’s feelings and mindsets that through her into unwanted memories. This is one of the reasons she steers clear of emotional connection of any kind. The feeling of comfort and dependence on others reminds her of the last time she felt that way, which is something she doesn’t like to recall. Ria’s major coping mechanism, if you hadn’t noticed already, is suppression. So she avoids memories of any kind—even the good stuff. It’s all mixed up with the bad. Any dealing with that kind of stuff distracts her from Getting Shit Done. Unfortunately, she’s SHIT at this, and is often swept up in thoughts of her family, her home, and her past life. A little part of her can’t help but long for these periodic accidental reminiscences—the only times she ever allows herself to truly miss her sister, her father, and her home.

JoAh, another Suppression Gal. Man, my Sotian girls are hot messes. Jo’s current work involves a lot of triggers—field after field of waving heads of golden wheat, the brilliant sun and drenching rains of the lowlands, little farmhouses and barns, smiling families with apple-cheeked kids… Like Ria, Jo tries not to think about the good, because it’s much too close to the bad. And for her, distraction could be deadly. Jo’s a little healthier than Ria about her trauma, though. (Or maybe she’s just better about being unhealthy.) She talks to people she trusts (ie people with a high enough security clearance), like Raja and Althea. Every once and a while she gives herself a night off to go to a bar with colleagues or stay in with a book and a cup of tea. She allows herself to stew in her memories during certain controlled times—so it won’t all build up and come bursting out when it could really cost her.

SanderGod, why are all the kids with Trauma™ at the top of my chart? I could have sworn there were some nice good healthy ones in here somewhere… Sander is mostly hit without nostalgia surrounding his little sis. His biggest trigger, of course, is Grace. It was hard for him to even be around her the first few weeks he lived at [redacted because the name is too embarrassing]. Grace, of course, is drawn by nature to anything she can’t have/anyone who appears not to like her, and so she pursued him to no end. Gradually, Sander developed a connection with Grace, careful not to project his feelings about his sister onto Grace. Nowadays they have a very healthy and adorable relationship, and though Grace still reminds him painfully of his sister sometimes, he’s able to deal with it. Sander doesn’t suppress as much as he minimizes. Raven’s often the one to find him in a mood—staring at a book without reading it, taking too many advil even though it literally does nothing except the potential of giving him liver damage, or fidgeting and bouncing even more aggressively than normal—and yell at him that no it’s not “nothing,” you asshole, what the fuck is up?

FisherWhile he doesn’t get hit with nostalgia too often, when he does it’s usually a pleasant experience for Fisher. Fisher’s a very in-the-moment kind of guy, and he’s a little oblivious to the everyday things that might trigger nostalgia in other people. Visiting home, or anything that reminds him of home—Delosian music, Delosian food, old book smell—always makes him smile. Fisher’s childhood wasn’t all cushy, but he never thinks about the bad stuff. Although you wouldn’t know it from his doomsday conspiracies, Fisher is an incurable optimist. He has the amazing ability not to really care about the bad stuff. Unfortunately, this can sometimes cause him to not even realize when he’s being having a not-so-great time. He might not even realize there was something better out there.

GraceLmao she’s a CHILD. What’s she got to be nostalgic about??

AsheOh man, Ashe is a fucking nostalgia king! Mostly because he just generally overthinks everything. Idiot can’t even jump out a window without a good old-fashioned childhood flashback. Ashe has also inherited my fun penchant for premature nostalgia—the inability to even properly enjoy a moment because he’s too wrapped ip in how much he’s going to miss this later. He’s constantly feeling as though he’s not fully in the moment, as though he’s floating above every scene of joy with a profound sense of missing. He has so much love for his friends, his city, the world, and he hates the temporariness of all of this. He can’t help but feel that every day he gets older and the world around him grows and changes and he is losing things. It’s not that he wishes everything would “go back to the way it was,” but he’s so scared of inevitably forgetting all the little things in every moment, every step of the way—the way Leo’s eyes close as he rests his head in Jason’s lap, how Dani’s hair ripples back behind her when she laughs, the razor-sharp quirk of Jean’s dark eyebrow when he thinks he’s told a particularly good sex joke—it’s all so beautiful but so temporary and Ashe is lost trying to catch it all. It all feels like it’s slipping through his fingers so fast.

RavenOh, Raven. If Raven ever gets nostalgic, no one would know. And if someone did happen to stumble upon Raven in an uncharacteristic slump of reminiscence, they wouldn’t live to tell the tale. I suppose Raven is something of a foil to Ashe (…and all my other characters, let’s be honest) in this respect. He doesn’t just “live in the moment” in the proverbial sense; his existence is so permanently ingrained in the now, now, now. Future Raven is an enigma; past Raven is barely even a specter. Raven is the idyllic teenager in this sense—all that matters is what’s happening, how he’s feeling, who he’s with, what he’s doing NOW. (Side note: this can be quite thrilling and frustrating for his boyfriend.)

Ok that’s enough of them for now. I got quite detailed. Sorry about that. I think my muse is so fucking antsy from me not writing in so long that as soon as I sat down at my computer to type this out she took the opportunity to vomit up some creative energy. Oops. I might be stealing some of this to help breathe some life back into the WIP. ANYWAY THANKS FOR THE ASK AMBER UR THE BEST.