#( dustin x heejin )
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evcrlasting · 4 months ago
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Closed starter for @fadinglights
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"If you asked me to help you hide a body, I would." Murder wasn't on the table and had they gotten to that point, Dustin would actually do anything to protect her but that wasn't the point right now. "I would have, I mean but I cannot keep doing this with you Heejin. We're either together or not, there's no in between for me." He stepped away from her, to prove a point. "I'm too old to act like a 20 something year old running around."
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collectorscorner · 6 years ago
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CC Blogger - New Arrivals @ Collectors Corner : Wednesday - 5/22/19
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evcrlasting · 3 months ago
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[X] for heejin & dustin
Send me a [X] to see my muses favorite picture of your muse | accepting
@fadinglights
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Dustin doesn't get to see her smile enough. Especially with her divorce and just the way Heejin is. So he adores and remembers every time she does smile or laugh. He just wants to see it more.
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evcrlasting · 3 months ago
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Her admission makes his heart leap, almost out of his chest. It says a lot but means so little in the truth. It's changed nothing but confirmed once again that they felt something for each other. Still he sighs. Dustin isn't sure what he could say, that he hasn't said today or in their previous conversations. "You know Heejin, you make me happy." He's not completely sure if he's said that before. He thinks he has, though now he's wondering if he just thought the implication spoke loud and clear to her. Dustin still isn't sure it changes much, and the last thing he wants is to pressure her but he just wanted... well more. Rolling his shoulders back, he wonders if maybe it would help to take the topic lighter. "Okay, what's two things you would do if fear didn't hold you back? Doesn't have to be with us."
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her  stomach  twists  when  he  mentions  how  seeing  her  with  someone  else  made  him  feel.  guilt  churns  inside  her,  and  she  hates  that  she's  put  him  through  so  much,  only  to  prolong  the  torture  even  now  with  her  indecision.  "i  would  feel  terrible."  she  admits  frankly.  it  still  makes  her  anxious,  wearing  her  suppressed  feelings  for  him  on  her  sleeve  now.  "but  you  deserve  to  be  happy."  if  he  decides  that  waiting  on  her  won't  be  worth  it,  she  would  have  no  choice  but  to  respect  his  choice.  she  nods  slowly,  whispering,  "i  know."  it  is  greedy  of  her  to  want  so  much  that  she  cannot  fully  commit  herself  to,  at  least  not  to  the  extent  that  she  wishes  she  could.
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evcrlasting · 3 months ago
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dustin has slowly, but surely, and unfortunately, realized that there is no amount of words to make her see what he needed her to see. she was still convinced of some reality that as far as he was aware, was untrue. although he can't imagine how much he can actually change her mind before he's tired of talking or she's tired of hearing. "tell me the truth. how would you feel if I dated someone else? i know how i'd feel after —" he cut himself off, trying to not pressure her anymore. he had always been great at being patient but when it involved people he loved, that patience thinned dramatically. "heejin, that is one fear that i can't solve for you."
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she  knows  it  isn't  fair  for  him  to  ask  her  to  wait,  but  she  doesn't  have  a  better  alternative  either.  her  worry  doesn't  subside  even  when  he  concedes,  as  she  senses  his  underlying  unwillingness,  which  she  can't  blame  him  for.  he  deserves  someone  who  can  offer  the  best  version  of  themselves,  not  a  shadow  of  who  they  once  were.  she  freezes  when  he  takes  her  hand,  though  she  doesn't  pull  away.  she  nods,  feeling  somewhat  comforted  by  his  gentle  words,  but  doubts  linger.  "i  know,  but  it'd  be  messier  if  it's  with  me."  still,  if  he  decides  this  is  worth  it,  who  is  she  to  fight  against  it?  she  takes  a  deep  breath,  her  gaze  remaining  on  their  entwined  hands.  "i  don't  want  to  risk  losing  you."
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evcrlasting · 4 months ago
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although she's nodding he can see that the process he wasn't to take place, isn't what is happening. her ex took a toll on her and dustin's only hope was that she wouldn't be bogged down by it. yet what he wants and what is real are still not aligning. waiting around for a woman he couldn't have? he was only getting better and better at it. yet now that she was even available, she wasn't. "right. right. I won't push you." though he really wanted to. if only he saw heejin's ex, he would swing within minutes. dustin took her hand, tentatively at first before securing his grip. "you will mess it up, hell so will i. we're human, it doesn't matter when or how we start. relationships will always be messy in some way." it was two imperfect people trying to make life work.
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heejin  nods,  though  a  part  of  her  remains  unconvinced.  as  much  blame  as  she  has  pinned  on  her  ex,  it  takes  two  for  a  seemingly  perfect  marriage  to  fall  apart.  her  own  hands  must  be  tainted  in  its  own  way,  too.  "i  wish  i  could  give  you  an  answer."  she  admits  honestly,  but  she  has  no  clue.  how  long  does  it  take  for  someone  to  restore  their  faith  in  love  and  not  be  paranoid  over  everything  after  such  a  catastrophic  fallout?  "i  want  this  with  you  —  i  really  do,  but  i  don't  want  to  start  this  if  i  can't  be  sure  that  i  won't  mess  it  up."  that  would  be  terribly  selfish  and  he  deserves  better  than  that.
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evcrlasting · 4 months ago
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He can't help but try his best to hold fast on his stance as he see's Heejin. If there's anyone who understands what she's going through, it's him. To the point where if he wasn't so sure that caving in would ruin him, then he would. Still the understanding is only so much. "You aren't messed up Heejin. You know I'd tell you that," he joked, though it was hard to turn the current atmosphere into anything other than serious. He's not sure that he wants to but he fears that the conversation will spill into something he can't handle. "How much longer? I won't stay at a distance just because you need more time. You're pushing my hand here."
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heejin  sighs,  deep  down  she  has  known  that  this  conversation  is  inevitable.  she  nods  slowly,  in  her  gaze  a  mix  of  understanding  and  panic.  "i  get  that."  she  cannot  fault  him  for  not  wanting  to  waste  his  time,  but  this  is  far  from  that  for  her.  "but  try  to  see  it  from  my  perspective,  okay?"  after  years  of  being  in  a  seemingly  perfect  marriage  that  ended  in  flames  abruptly,  she  can  hardly  call  herself  an  advocate  for  love.  "of  course,  i  want  this  with  you  and  it's  not  your  fault  that  i'm  messed  up,  but  i  just..."  she  takes  a  shaky  breath,  trying  to  soothe  herself  before  she  breaks.  "i  need  more  time."
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