#( I can't say for sure when I'll be around when energy allots it but I lurk nonetheless <3 )

[bloodawakening]

ooc, don't reblog.  Where does the time go?

[talkingpointsusa]

Tim Pool's given up on being a journalist and is now just getting ChatGPT to do his work for him

Tim Pool is such an idiot and I find it absolutely stunning that he's managed to keep his grift going for so long. So, he's supposedly covering the news that Trump and Biden have agreed to do a series of televised debates and he naturally takes it to the stupidest place imaginable. Lets get into it.

00:00, Tim Pool: "Following the news that Joe Biden had offered to debate Donald Trump, Trump accepted and now Joe Biden accepted, they both agreed to a June 27th debate on CNN but here's the fun part my friends. You know, it looks like they crafted the rules to make sure that RFK Jr cannot be on the debate stage which I find hilarious."

Yes, RFK Jr doesn't currently qualify for the debate but that's absolutely a non-issue. To believe that this isn't going to be a race between Biden and Trump is a complete denial of reality and RFK is absolutely not such a huge threat to Biden and Trump that they've concocted the polling requirements around keeping him out like RFK is saying. If RFK meets the polling threshold he can make the debate stage, problem solved.

00:27, Tim Pool: "But Joe Biden has some insane demands. No audience, mics are cut off after the allotted time. It seems like this is all being set up for Joe Biden but of course you knew that."

Yeah, I wonder why Biden's team made some of those demands. Could it have something to do with the fact that the last time they debated it was a complete shitshow where Trump repeatedly interrupted Biden and everyone left somehow more uninformed than when they came in?

If Donald Trump is incapable of debating on the issues without interrupting, that's more indicative of his character than anything else. Now, this guy Tim is gonna do a deep dive on the election and just....get a load of this.

01:17, Tim Pool: "But I love how they're icing out RFK Jr, he's issued a statement, he's quite upset so we'll talk about that but then we'll do a deeper dive analysis. My friends, as we're tracking all this election news, the 2024 race is heating up, the debates are on, I went to our good friend ChatGPT."

Yes, you read that right. Tim Pool, a guy who's trying to be a "serious" journalist, is using ChatGPT for the purposes of political analysis. This is a level of being a complete lazy idiot that I thought was impossible to achieve, we're breaking new ground here ladies and gentlemen.

I hopefully don't have to explain why this is a remarkably stupid thing to do but I'll just mention that ChatGPT has a long track record of outright making stuff up. ChatGPT is absolutely not something that any serious person should use for political analysis.

01:33, Tim Pool: "And I gotta say I am deeply impressed. There's a lot of data to calculate that I normally actually do."

Sure you do, that's how your dumb ass predicted that Trump would win a 49 state landslide right? This has the energy of a 2nd grader saying "I did the homework, yes really, but I also used ChatGPT to do it too".

01:45, Tim Pool: "I'll give you an example. There was a -- I can't believe I actually did this."

Me neither Tim, me neither.

02:55, Tim Pool: "ChatGPT, the first result it gives me when I did an overly simplified breakdown was a tie."

Yeah, maybe that's why you shouldn't try to use ChatGPT to predict the election genius. I mean for goodness sakes, Tim just went on a rant about how great ChatGPT is at analyzing political data and then let it slip that it's first prediction was something that is absolutely not going to happen. What are we even doing here?

Anyway, Tim rants about all the debate stuff but my curiosity was peaked by Tim Pool's ChatGPT political analysis.

14:26, Tim Pool: "In real time I'm going to use ChatGPT, which now has access to all this modern data, to break down the electoral college and voting by states."

Checkmate Tim, time to delete your channel:

14:48, Tim Pool: "The first thing we need is a breakdown so 'Give me a breakdown of all states votes by party affiliation in the 2020 presidential race'. Ok, give me a breakdown of all states votes by party and it's kind of wild. ChatGPT now calculates and it's breaking down the percentages."

You know what, why even bother having an election? Tim Pool and ChatGPT, the two greatest political brains on the planet, think that it's going to be a landslide victory for Trump so an election would be a total waste of everybody's time. We should just call it now and save everybody the trouble.

This is just completely idiotic, seriously what kind of dumbass argument is this.

"I know it's really early in the election cycle and polling can change at any time but my computerized Magic 8-Ball can say the stuff that I want it to say."

He spends fifteen minutes on this by the way. But don't worry guys, Tim has also done all this himself. We know because he's told us (and no, we can't see his actual calculations).

16:02, Tim Pool: "I actually compiled this by hand when I was doing a polling calculation because they didn't do a national level poll. Not by hand but like, I went to each state pulled the numbers, load them to an Excel spreadsheet, load out the Excel spreadsheets, broke down party affiliation of all the red states, all the blue states, we can do that in two seconds right now and we're getting these hard numbers."

Sure you did Tim, sure you did. No, he never actually shows these spreadsheets that he supposedly made. To be fair though, if I was as bad at predicting political outcomes as Tim Pool is and I absolutely had to throw my hat into the political ring I guess I'd also use ChatGPT and even then I'd still verify the numbers that it gives me. The scariest thing about this is that I'm pretty sure that he isn't trying to lie here, I think his dumbass actually thinks he's onto something. Also, is this you?

Anyway, predicting the election right now even without ChatGPT is absolutely an insane prospect. So much can change between now and November. Unless ChatGPT can see into the future this is absolutely a futile and ridiculous endeavor. I'm starting to wonder if that beanie is cutting off the circulation to Tim's brain.

The thing is that even if the math is correct, Tim's example where the party-affiliated voter numbers are the same as they were in 2020 and the current independent favorability will influence the vote is absolutely ridiculous. Absolutely no serious person thinks that either Trump or Biden is going to win by a landslide and most think it's going to be a tight race. In short, Tim's little adventure in feeding ChatGPT leading questions and bizarre hypotheticals is completely pointless and stupid.

20:25, Tim Pool: "Now the ultimate goal here for those that are listening is to use all of the data, plug in today's data four years later, and see what the projection would be based on current polls. It's not exact science, it's estimation."

Then why are we even doing this? In our next episode of Tim Pool we'll probably see him using the horoscope chart from his local newspaper to prove once and for all that Trump is going to win by a landslide.

Tim continues messing around with ChatGPT and then ChatGPT declares that Trump wins every single state. This is evidently too far even for Tim.

25:15, Tim Pool: "Ok, this is ridiculous. It says Trump wins every single state. No no no, see ChatGPT, no no, you get it wrong. ChatGPT can only go so far."

And there you have the exact reason why you can't use ChatGPT to predict election outcomes. I love how it's too unrealistic for even Tim Pool. Tim then adds the Democrats and Republicans to the independent count and it still declares that Trump will win in a landslide, just in a way that's somewhat more realistic. Get a load of this though.

26:37, Tim Pool: "Plugging it all in and it's totally wrong. Ha, thanks for sitting here as ChatGPT was unable to do it. Let me just try one simple calculation -- so the numbers it gave us up until this point were good and then it's --- ok, well actually it says this projection suggests a landslide victory for Trump based on the assumption that the current independent favorability directly influences the total vote count and that party affiliated voter numbers remain constant from 2020. Oh, well there you have it ladies and gentlemen. They're saying that Trump's gonna win 446, that's actually it's calculation."

"Yeah, it's totally wrong and...wait, it projected that the guy that I like wins. WELL THERE YOU HAVE IT!!!"

27:51, Tim Pool: "I don't think that's a fair assessment, I think it's a little bit wild but far be it from me to challenge ChatGPT."

Tim Pool and ChatGPT can unite behind a common passion of making insane political predictions. Also, Tim's title sure is a lot more certain about this than he is.

Conclusion:

Well, that was fifteen minutes of my day wasted on watching a grown man try to make ChatGPT practice divination. The level of sheer insanity displayed by Tim Pool increases every time I watch a new video of his. I eagerly await when he sacrifices a cow to the sky gods so that they can tell him who's going to win 2024. Cheers and I'll see you in the next one.

Original Video:

Timcast. “Biden & Trump DEBATE ON, Biden DEMANDS Insane Protections, RFK ICED OUT, AI Predicts TRUMP WINS 2024.” YouTube, 15 May 2024.

Sources:

Matt O'Brien. “Chatbots Sometimes Make Things Up. Is AI’s Hallucination Problem Fixable?” AP News, 1 Aug. 2023.

“RFK Jr. Accuses Biden and Trump of “Colluding” to Exclude Him from Debates.” NBC News, 15 May 2024.

[dwarf-vader-of-middle-earth]

Not doing ok... Wish I was, though... Idk what to do to make myself feel better. I'm literally being blamed for causing the problems in my life that I have no control over (not having a job that gives enough hours when I don't make the schedule and we're as a store only alloted so many hours to spread across every employee, having chronic pain all day every day despite the fact that I've done everything possible to manage it and it just gets worse, and not being good enough by not doing enough around the house when I do what's asked of me and still that's not enough). I'm told that this is my fault. That I can do more. WHAT MORE?!?!?! I've done literally everything. Opened my availability to full time, done physical therapy and exercised and eaten differently, taken on responsibility in the house by cleaning up and washing everything and doing chores. Literally, it's your fucking fault that this isn't good enough. I do what's asked of me!!! Every time!!!!!! And what's asked isn't enough but what more is there to do when I've done literally everything possible??!!! All of this is out of my control damnit!!!! I don't control my job, my job controls ME!!!!! My illnesses aren't under my control, they control me as well!!!! And you, accusing me of these things being my fault entirely, that's on you and your narrow-minded views. Maybe you try getting a real job that isn't a MLM one, and see how you do. Tell me it's feasible to control everything when you're literally ruled by someone else's rules at all times. Try being in a house where the jurisdiction comes from a person who never tells you you're doing it right and that you're never doing enough even though you've exhausted yourself beyond your limits all day every day for your entire life while doing every possible thing to satisfy that person!!!!! The reason I seek to get away from you is so I'm not controlled anymore, and I'm finally free to do as I do. To live my life how I want. You? You're the one who has a chokehold on me. Maybe if I didn't have to spend all my energy doing everything possible to make sure you don't yell at me, I'd have energy to do more shit!!!! I wouldn't be avoiding you if that was the case!!!! If you just stopped gaslighting, lying, and hurting me, maybe I'd be happier and want to come out to spend time with you!!! But you refuse to listen to me in every way, and what I have to say. You hear, but you don't listen. You don't think you're wrong. Ever. I've told you when you're blatantly wrong, and you deny it left and right, then proceed to tell me, "Come to me any time I do <thing> again, and I'll apologize." And then I tell you when you do that thing, and you deny it ever happened at all. I'm tired. Of you. Of this. I want to get away, and I can't. I shouldn't want to for these reasons, but that's what it's come down to. And that is entirely your fault, not mine.

[theonlyjourneythatmatters]

So, let me preface this by saying that I did struggle figuring out food choices and how to get my calories in check. I struggled with a lot. But let me start from the beginning! This is going to be long- so buckle in. Also- get it out of your head that this is a "diet". This needs to be treated like a lifestyle change.

PHENTERMINE

I went to the Weight Loss Clinic in D'Iberville and got the Phentermine. It's not cheap by any stretch, but if you're like me and had zero energy or motivation, and you needed that jump start to get you started, it is worth it. The side effects for me have been mild. I barely slept the first week. They advise to take it early. I was taking it around 7:30-8:00 am. However, even though I barely slept, I did not feel exhausted and worn out the next morning- so there's that. It does make you sweat a lot, and if you're not eating enough, you will get shaky.

WATER WATER WATER

Water is a must, especially if you're taking the Phentermine. It can and WILL dehydrate you super quickly. Either buy a gallon of water to keep with you at all times, or invest in one of those large water bottles off of Amazon.

MEAL PREPPING

I did not wait to start eating better. The Dr at the clinic told me to focus on protein more so than anything else. So I did my research to find out what had the most protein in it. The obvious choices are meats- fish (very good for you, plus it has Omega-3 which is essential for heart health), chicken/turkey, and beef. I'm not a big chicken fan, but it is what it is.

Now, I love fruits and vegetables so paring the sides with the protein meals was not difficult for me.

Most vegetables are not very high in protein- they're also not high in calories. Raw, fresh vegetables anyway. A medium cucumber is about 4 calories. FOUR. WHOLE. CALORIES. For one single raw cucumber! Frozen or prepared vegetables are a completely different story. Fruit, on the other hand, can be high in calories- but the serving sizes are pretty decent.

Snacks were a little more tricky because my favorite thing to snack on is chips. And how many calories are in chips? A LOT. Too much for me to be comfortable giving up 1/3 of my caloric intake for the day, that's for sure. So, I opted for chicharrons and veggie straws.

You can absolutely tailor the meals to your liking- just be mindful of the calories and serving sizes.

Now, let's talk about actual meal prepping. Go ahead and get your eye rolling and sighs out of the way now. I felt the same way ya'll did. Meal prepping takes time. It takes planning. And most importantly, it takes dedication. This is a super important step that you do NOT want to skip if you're serious about losing weight.

For me, it helps when I'm at work because it prevents me from having to go to Taco Bell or somewhere to grab a quick lunch. And don't get me wrong- if you want Taco Bell for lunch, go get it. Do not deprive yourself of the things you want- but work it into your calories. Depriving yourself of the things you like is one of the major reasons "diets" fail. But I digress.

I went to Walmart and bought partitioned meal prep containers.

Just simple containers with clear lids. I'm sure you could find those on Amazon as well- but I didn't want to wait. I also went to dollar tree and got the round containers for my fruit.

BREAKFAST

My breakfast was something simple: cottage cheese and fruit. Some days I had the cottage cheese flips (that had fruit in jelly) and other day I just had a yogurt. Now, I got to Biloxi Nutrition and get one of their meal replacement shakes and that keeps me full all the way through lunch. My favorites are: Banana Nut Bread, Banana Pudding, and strawberry cheesecake. All of the shakes are 220-240 calories so they're great if you're trying to stay under- or if you've blown them on other meals, you could get one for lunch or dinner instead of breakfast. I also stopped going to Dunkin Donuts and Starbucks for a coffee in the morning. If I'm going to eat, I'll grab an iced protein coffee from Biloxi Nutrition. Very few calories and it tastes great.

LUNCH

I cooked all the food for 2 weeks' worth of lunch. I bought chicken and tilapia for my proteins, and black beans and squash/zucchini for my sides. The chicken and fish was cooked in the air fryer with no oil. I did season it with salt, pepper, garlic and onion powder, and some Slap Ya Mama! seasoning. I think I may have also put lemon pepper on some of them. I tried to mix up the flavors so I didn't get bored eating them- different flavors meant it felt like a whole new meal.

I also bought some steak medallions and shrimp. I did buy some frozen, premade veggies: broccoli in cheese sauce, a brussels sprout and carrot medley, and some butternut squash spirals.

I bought minute maid brown rice and mixed it with the seasoned black beans. This gave me a little more of a full feeling (carbs make you feel full) and added texture to the beans. Brown rice is better for you than white, but if you prefer white, you do you, boo boo!

The sweet mini peppers are just halved with cream cheese and Everything Bagel Seasoning (I found it at Walmart). Then I just had cut up strawberries and whole blueberries for something sweet. I started eating those with breakfast and that one container lasts me almost all day.

DINNER

Depending on my calorie count for the rest of the day, my dinners vary. This is a spinach wrap stuffed with 2 pieces of turkey bacon, 1/4 of an avocado, spinach, thinly sliced onion and cucumber, Bitten creamy strawberry dressing, and medium heat banana pepper rings. The cucumbers I allowed to sit in red wine vinegar and a little bit of canola oil while I prepared the rest of my dinner. And the peppers are the same as what I do for lunches.

Sometimes I'll have a big salad with a lot of added stuff (sunflower seeds, pumpkin seeds, lots of veggies, chicken, steak, or shrimp, olives, etc).

SNACKS

I usually eat trail mix, or the 100 calorie pack of nuts. I sometimes pair that with fruit, turkey bites, and/or a stick of colby jack cheese. I also enjoy chicharrons (BBQ is my favorite),

CALORIES

So I know I'm talking a lot about calories. So how do you figure out how many calories something has? Well, for starters, it's on the back of most packing along with the other nutrition information. Duh. But I would assume your question would be more along the lines of "How do I know how many calories are in my meal?" This has a simple answer. Get a calorie counter! There are plenty of free ones that you can use. I use MyNetDiary. Some of the options do want you to use the Premium paid service, but for the last 3 weeks, the free options have worked just fine for me. This app will ask you what your weight goal is, and will set a daily calorie intake for you based on your current weight, your goal weight, and when you want to reach that goal. It will adjust automatically based on your entries.

You can also link smart watches and smart scales to it.

On this app, you can track your calories by meal and snack. You can also track your weight loss, water intake, and goals. What I love about this app is it allows you to scan barcodes of the food you're eating and it automatically inputs the calories and nutritional information. AND it figures out the calories for you, based on how many servings you input. You can find the serving size on the package.

This doesn't work for everything, though. There are some things that you can't scan (restaurants, the drinks I get from Biloxi Nutrition). So with these, you can go online and search the calories or you can ask (Biloxi Nutrition has their values listed on their menu boards).

Portion control is imperative. Especially for calorie counting. It seems crazy that you can have only 3 mini pickles per serving- but pair it with a few almonds and a little bit of cheese and beef jerky and you have a low calorie snack and it's not going to feel like you're cheating yourself.

Log absolutely everything that you eat on the app. You may struggle for the first week but you WILL get it. It takes research and practice, and detailing your menu to the things that you enjoy.

GYM MEMBERSHIP

I got active. I joined the gym, and I actually go and work out. The best part of being active and doing workouts, is that it BURNS calories! What's so great about that? Well, let's say that the calorie app said you need 1500 calories a day to hit your goal weight in the time you allotted. You go to the gym and do a moderate workout on the treadmill or bike (or whatever). You burn 400 calories. Your 1500 limit just went up to 1900. Now, that doesn't mean you have to reach that limit- but you now have more wiggle room to eat something that may be a little higher in calories. The gym I go to has a separate app that you can download and scan the QR code on the machine- it automatically logs it so when I go to enter my exercise on the calorie counter, I can just pull the app up and see my total for the day rather than trying to remember it later on.

I don't get crazy with working out. I DO NOT go every day. The general rule of thumb is 30 minutes of moderate activity per day. Some weeks I go twice, some weeks three times. This also varies based on my schedule. However, when I go, I make sure to spend at least one full hour working out (So if I go twice, that's really 4 days; three times is 6 days, etc). So if you can't make it to the gym every day for 30 minutes, on the days you can go, double your time and do light activity during the days you're unable to go. 30 minutes a day seems like a waste to me- so I make it count when I do go.

One thing you have to remember: muscle weighs more than fat. So while you may see the scale rise in number (if you're focusing on muscle building), you will also see your clothing size shrinking. DO NOT let this discourage you! If you're working out and your clothes are loose but the scale says 5 lbs heavier, you're not failing- you're gaining muscle.

Also, learn to go to the gym by yourself, and be okay with the fact that you may not always have a companion to go with you. Sure, it's nice to have someone along with you- but you're never going to get anywhere in life if you're having to wait on someone to be with you in order to do what you want.

APPLE WATCH AND SMART SCALE

I also started wearing my apple watch every day. This keeps track of my heart rate and my step count (which you can also log on the app- I usually don't unless it's a workout day).

I purchased a smart scale that I can link to my phone. When I weigh myself, it gives me other measurements too. I purchased the RENPHO Body Fat Scale Smart BMI Scale Digital Bathroom Wireless Weight Scale, Body Composition Analyzer with Smartphone App sync with Bluetooth, 396 lbs - Black. It connects to my phone and keeps track of everything in the app. It shows me my BMI, body fat %, water, muscle mass, etc. It shows you how much weight you've lost or gained since your last weigh-in. It also shows how much your BMI has decreased and how much your body fat has decreased. You can set a goal on this app as well- but I haven't.

Another MAJOR thing about a scale- you're going to be tempted to weigh yourself every day to see if you've made progress. DO NOT DO THIS! This is a leading factor in why people fail with "diets". They weigh themselves daily- see no changes (or see the scale go up) and get discouraged. I'd suggest no more than once a week- twice if you must. I try to weigh myself every Saturday (since it was on a Saturday when I started this journey and my initial weight was taken the day before). If I want to see how my week is going, I MAY weigh myself on a Wednesday.

Here are some tips about weighing yourself:

Do not weigh yourself daily

Weigh yourself once a week

Weigh yourself in the morning- you weigh more in the afternoon/evening because you're carrying around everything you've had to eat and drink.

Weigh yourself naked. You'd be surprised how much clothes and shoes actually weigh.

Don't get discouraged by the number on the scale- again, if your clothes are fitting looser, then you're going in the right direction.

Also, please remember- you did not get to the weight you are over night and you're not going to lose it over night. If you're looking for a fast, low-hassle weight loss program, gastric bypass surgery may be more your speed.

WHAT I LEAVE YOU WITH...

If you made it to the bottom of this post, CONGRATULATIONS! I know it was a long read with a lot of information. You may still have questions and concerns- you may still be confused and unsure what your next step is. But the fact that you got to this means you're ready to start.

You've crossed the biggest hurdle, which is understanding that it's not going to always be easy to make the changes you need in order to see the weight loss you want. You're taking the first steps to a healthier, happier you.

If you have any questions or need any help, feel free to reach out to me. I will give advice and suggestions if I am able to help get you on the right path.

[punkscowardschampions]

Ali & Marlene

Ali: Hey babe, sorry I missed rehearsal, know you rocked it regardless  💋 Marlene: Kind of need our lead singer to do that. Instrumental wasn't the vision for the track, babygirl Marlene: Where did you have to be? We could've rescheduled Ali: I know, I know, my bad! Make it up to you Ali: Ugh, got detention, didn't I Ali: don't even get me started on that Marlene: Make it up to me alone or me and the band? Marlene: Little rebel Marlene: Can't have you getting in more trouble by ditching, can we? Marlene: I'll add in another rehearsal, the girls won't mind Ali: Why not both? Ali: Come over and I'll record the vocals for you Ali: You know it boo 👩🏼‍🎤 Ali: Exactly, even though I'm fully staging a protest tomorrow Marlene: That's my girl Marlene: I'll be there front and centre, lending my voice to the movement Ali: Aww, so supportive Ali: cute 😉 Ali: I've rallied all the usual suspects so it shouldn't be a flop Ali: we have the allotted hours, like, if they fail to control us in 'em, why add more, yeah? pointless, where's the logic Marlene: Making me so proud to have you on my arm Ali: As you should be Ali: Though that arms not bad 💪 Marlene: I wouldn't be the best bassist in this shithole if it was Ali: One track mind 😏 SUCH a bassist Ali: don't you ever break that focus? Marlene: It has been known Marlene: For the right girl Ali: Introduce me to her some time, yeah? Ali: Get some tips Marlene: You know her pretty well Marlene: The name's Alison, like the song Ali: So soft Ali: Still say we do a Elvis Costello and Dolly mashup Ali: idc what you say, Jolene is a bop and you need to own it Marlene: If I can hear you do an original Elvis cover, I'll think about it Ali: Fine, I'll happily sing about myself all day Ali: can even get the accent down, thanks Ma Marlene: I'll be waiting for that Marlene: The girls are asking if you need posters or anything else for the protest? Anything to stick around and drink more Ali: Patience, babe Ali: Gotta save these pipes for the protest Ali: Feel free to go for their lives, like Ali: Bear in mind if they use too many expletives, the School ain't gonna listen tho Ali: creative language, not colourful, ladies Marlene: No promises on getting them to dial back the reclaimed slurs Marlene: But we'll leave off calling the teachers the cunts they are Marlene: For you, our glorious leader Ali: 🙇 down Ali: I'll take it, they're not going to go anywhere near hate speech vibes, too risky Marlene: Tempting offer Marlene: I'll take you up on it when we're alone Ali: Yeah? Gonna skip rehearsal more often then Marlene: For revolution and no less, babe Marlene: But I have missed you Ali: The revolution's always rolling, babe Ali: I can't stop the wheels of change, you know Marlene: I know you want me to make a rock and roll pun Marlene: But I refuse Ali: Boooooo 👎 Ali: too punk for me now? Marlene: Not gonna quote a dead white man either, not even Lennon Marlene: You're still my little punk princess, you know Ali: Throw some Yoko craziness at me Ali: 👑 Marlene: Keeping it back so the protest won't flop. Can't let it Ali: Sure, you just don't wanna get on the rooftop with your mates Ali: someone'd fall, or get pushed 😂 Marlene: Not me or you Marlene: With these arms we're safe Ali: 🔫 pew pew Ali: they wanna try me, bitch Marlene: We should fill up supersoakers for those who are anti our message Marlene: Piss on their negativity in a literal sense Ali: not with actual piss, right? Marlene: You have to start thinking punk rock, babe Ali: I am not pissing into a supersoaker Ali: not dying to prove my aim is as good as a man's like Ali: you do you, babe but I'll leave it at good old fashioned water Marlene: Now who's deserving the boos and jeers Marlene: So regal of you Ali: what can i say? my idea of a good time isn't pissing on my own hands Ali: crazy, i know 😉 Marlene: How true my love is Marlene: Any time's a good time with my baby Ali: 💙 Ali: forreal tho, what are we doing this weekend Marlene: There are a few parties Ali: where Ali: i wanna go as far away as poss Marlene: They're local, usual suspects Marlene: We can do something else Ali: Think of something better, yeah Ali: I'm sick of the locals at the mo Marlene: I'll come back to you with a plan Ali: 💋 Ali: that's my girl Marlene: What am I good for if I can't take you away from this shithole? Marlene: Not like it's that hard Ali: You got your license, 'til I got mine I'm at your beck and call, like Ali: Your Ma will be cool, yeah? Doesn't need to be long, just long enough to breathe Marlene: I'll make a deal with her Marlene: Name drop you since she's a fan Ali: Such a parent pleaser 😇 Marlene: If you sang it she'd do anything you say Marlene: Thinks you've got the voice of an angel for sure Ali: Aww, what a babe Ali: like mother like daughter 😏 Marlene: She had her moments of hell raising Marlene: Would to this day if it was possible Ali: Imma ask her all about it when I see her Ali: fo'sho Marlene: That'd make her happy Ali: Who doesn't love being scandalous? Marlene: Whoever gave you detention Ali: Give you three guesses 😑 Marlene: I don't need them Marlene: Most are in your fan club too Ali: Exactly Ali: Don't teach R.S. if you can't handle healthy debate Marlene: Yeah. We live in Dublin not a dictatorship Ali: Honestly Ali: Some people really wanna take it back to the troubles Ali: Shouldn't have said as much but chill, dude Marlene: Freedom of speech, babe Marlene: I've lost count of how many teachers I've called homophobes Marlene: Gotta speak up Ali: True Ali: you are a bit quick on the draw sometimes, like Marlene: I'm not letting them get away with it Ali: Just sayin', plenty of reasons to give you dirty looks, babe, not all of 'em that you're gay 😜 Marlene: I'm a perfect gentleman and you know it Ali: True Ali: You don't look it tho Marlene: You don't look like a rebel queen Marlene: And yet Ali: I know looks are deceiving, tell it to the homophobes, babe 😏 Ali: also you gotta stop with the compliments 😾 Marlene: But everyone's clearing out. It's the perfect time to shower you with them Marlene: Where do you wanna be? Here or there Ali: When bae only sweet talks you when their mates aren't about Ali: SUCH a fuckboy, darling 💋 Marlene: You know what I was getting at, darling Marlene: We can be alone finally Marlene: But only if you're in the mood Ali: I'll come over Ali: as much as my Ma is also a fan, just yours like, not so much mine Marlene: Let me pick you up Marlene: It's too dark for that shit Ali: Nah, I wanna walk Ali: gotta burn off the energy I didn't get to rock out Marlene: Hold your keys since you won't take my knife off me Ali: Don't worry Ali: My Da beat you to the self-defense lesson, like Ali: I'm sweet Marlene: If I'm not there to protect you, I'm bound to worry Ali: You worry too much, baby Ali: Good thing I'm coming to take all your cares away Ali: and I've got bud, naturally 🚬 Marlene: And I hid some drinks from the vultures Ali: Party of two 😘 Marlene: When you get here. Until you do I'm sitting on the floor alone writing shitty songs about you Ali: Try and write a good one, will ya? Not having it bandied about that I'm a shit muse 😉 Ali: you could never Ali: gonna play for me when I get there? Marlene: Been trying since I met you, babygirl Marlene: It's not you, it's me Ali: Nah Ali: there's a hit in there, I just gotta try harder Ali: as you're so anti-establishment, your brain is noping on writing a bop that everyone will love Marlene: I want you to love it Marlene: You're the one it's for Ali: I'm excited to hear Ali: assuming I don't get shanked on the way by the big bad wolf Marlene: Your tragic early death isn't the inspiration I want or need Ali: Tell it to the TV writers, hun Ali: angry protest song #765 Marlene: I'll sing you my shitty song and you can die laughing Ali: Never Ali: cross my heart Marlene: And fingers that I can patch together a chorus that doesn't make me wanna die before you get here Ali: 🤞 Ali: I have faith enough for two Marlene: As an angel, you kind of have to bring it Ali: No pressure 😓 Marlene: I'm more than okay with you lacking it, stick it to your detention giver over again Marlene: And I love you, so forgiven most sins Ali: A benevolent Goddess you are Marlene: Modeled on the original lesbian in the sky Ali: Debated theology enough today to live and let live on that one babe Marlene: Promise I'll save the angry lesbian god essay recital for another night Ali: You're a doll 💋 Ali: Oh, hold up, I see my ex Ali: ready for this awkward convo in 3 2 Ali: brb Marlene: Bet you want me to pick you up now, don't you? Ali: [15 mins later] Ali: That was wild Marlene: What the fuck, Ali Marlene: I was about to start searching for you Ali: Soz, more chatty than I remember Ali: only gone at got someone pregnant hasn't he Marlene: Dodged a bullet Ali: Tell me about it Ali: Still out on the town tryna get some though Ali: is that the new come on? I'm fertile! Marlene: In this town, likely Marlene: Which ex is it? Ali: #4 good drugs, bad teeth Ali: the one who lowkey stalked me after and my brother had to smack him one Ali: good times, unexpected detour down memory lane there but got us some freebies so Marlene: It took 15 mins to get what you're owed, how long does he take over customers who aren't his stalked exes Marlene: bad business is what you should've called him Marlene: Or manners Ali: names are definitely open to workshopping Ali: he had to show me the scan pics, duh Marlene: Had to do the whole come on Marlene: fucking pig Ali: Bless Ali: have your fun whilst you still can, kid Marlene: not with my girlfriend Ali: don't worry babe, got the drugs for free free Ali: not suck my dick free Marlene: Are you gonna be here soon Marlene: I can still bring the car Ali: Yeah, I'll get a wriggle on Ali: 5 minutes if I run Marlene: If you don't run into any more exes first Ali: cities littered with 'em Marlene: If you didn't date men you could stay friends with them Ali: why would I wanna do that? Ali: I've seen your dyke drama, a no thank you Marlene: I don't have dyke drama Marlene: You're the one trying to avoid the awkward Ali: 😏 Ali: I don't care, its funny Ali: he wasn't that bad, really Ali: don't need to add every ex to my inner circle though, that's a madness Marlene: He stalked you Marlene: He's an asshole Ali: Not properly Ali: Just had issue letting go as fast as I did, who can blame him 😘 Marlene: It's not funny, Ali, it's fucked Ali: So serious 😾 Ali: It ain't like he locked me in his basement, I get to decide how fucked it was or wasn't Marlene: You get to brush it under the carpet too, doesn't make it right Ali: 🙄 you're as bad as my mother Marlene: maybe she's got a point Ali: Ugh, don't need to point score, she already likes ya, babe Ali: he's just a stupid kid, not fucking Bundy, yeah, let's chill Marlene: He doesn't have to be Bundy to be held accountable, babe Marlene: He's gonna be someone's dad Marlene: What the fuck Ali: for what? being a bit of a prick at 16 Ali: s'not a crime, last time I checked Marlene: it doesn't have to be Marlene: Lads think they can do whatever they want Marlene: They can't and shouldn't Ali: Nah, this isn't a soap box moment, babe Ali: we all do things we know are wrong, and ain't proud of Ali: 'cos of how we're feeling Ali: Honestly, not a big deal Ali: and not an exclusively male thing, that's a crock of shit Marlene: If I was heavy handed with one of my exes I'd get so much shit Marlene: He gets boys will be boys Marlene: It's not a big deal because you're making excuses for him Ali: From who? The lesbian mafia? Ali: Straight girls are INSANE Ali: way worse than #4 was ever Ali: I'm not gonna burn him at the stake for something I don't believe in Marlene: Straight girls are a whole other subject Marlene: Last I checked you didn't have any of them as exes so no really the point Ali: That you know of Marlene: I know about every one of your exes Ali: Okay, Liam Neeson Ali: can't be calling out stalkers when you're breathing down the phone like that 😂 Marlene: You're not funny Ali: I am though Ali: but I ain't coming over if you're gonna be such a downer Marlene: Are you serious? Marlene: Your jokes are so bad I can't tell Ali: Duh Ali: Killing my vibe, babe Marlene: You're basically here Ali: So? Ali: I can keep walking into this dark night Marlene: So come in Marlene: I'm sorry, baby Ali: You promise you're gonna stop being lame? Marlene: Cross my heart Ali: Okay, lemme in then