#( * rps: lynn syakov. )

[syaniides]

When You Die [July 12, 2020]

COMPLETE

J rubs his temples as he moves back into the trailer, the weight of everything and the heavy emotion still hanging in him from the visit to Uncle L’s grave making him feel like his head was going to fucking explode in the moment, along with the other fucking ugggggghhhhhhhhh naggingnaggingNagging in the corners of his brain, telling himself it wouldn’t be long before he could have a fucking cigarette, soon, soon, but...Jesus fucking hellllllll...closing his eyesreleasing a full ass breath from his nostrils as he holds his face in his hands, before taking a deep one in, deep breath, wanting to be fucking Okay, Okay, Good, for when — ahhh, he hears the door open behind him as Zip and Lynn walk back in, his lips naturally pursing a bit as he feels like a piece of fucking Shit for dragging Zip through this — why did he invite her again, she didn’t Need This, fuck — even as externally he puts a little smile on his lips, moving to wrap his arms tightly, comfortingly around her as he strokes her hair and plants a kiss on the top of her head. “Thank you, for being here with me, with Lynn, we both really appreciate it,” he sincerely, wholeheartedly tells her, knowing Lynn felt the same way but already knowing he wasn’t in the right state right now to be able to say it, knowing his dad’s death hitting that ten year mark today was fucking with him hard today...a sharp wave of emotion swiftly gutting him as his mind moves over how no one deserved that,no kid, never, especially not fucking Lynn, but...he releases another stream of breath out his nostrils, before releasing he was doing it into Zippy’s hair, shit, mphhh...as he moves to break the embrace and look at her, the feeling of what he....nghh, Had to do weighing on him in the moment so much that he coudn’t look past it, couldn’t keep going with everything the fucking way it was without...he rests his hand on Zippy’s shoulder as he looks at her, feeling a few small tears well in his eyes in spite of himself, god fucking damn it... “I...uh, gotta go out, for like a little bit...” He finally manages, his gaze momentarily, in inadvertently breaking from Zip’s, before he meets it again. “I’ll be back though...promise...” He adds, quickly giving her another kiss as he moves to grab his car keys, his wallet, shit, his mind quickly racking through if there was anything else he Needed, fuck...

Zippy quietly takes in some air after following behind the guys, the ride over having been suppppper quiet and the whole day just…really…sad. Sad. That’s the only word that came to her as she feels the pressure of her…releasing the breath, making her way inside instantly feeling the pressure, the warm feelings as she hears the kiss, Jaden’s words, her arms weakly moving up along his back, crossing over one another and tightening around him. Nodding her head quietly against him as she keeps where she was until she feels him separate from her…kinda. Looking up as she feels like…looking into his eyes and giving him…or, trying to anyway, a little smile without the sad but not convinced she was doing that whole thing right…hearing the promise and nodding her head once again trying to like Get It, guessing he just…needed space for a little while and wanting to like give him that if it helped in even a little…tiny…way, “Ok.” She ever so softly breathes out, moving her arms down and letting him go as she feels the quick…like a whole two seconds…kiss. Her arms folding in after crossing along one another as she watches Jaden…do the things…looking super ?!?!?! “What’re looking for? Maybe…I saw it?”

…What the fuck did you need for this kinda shit again?! Jaden’s mind moving at a frenzied, manic pace as he tries to think through everything that might…No, No, No, none of it seeming useful or Right as he continues to move through the trailer at a breakneck pace, looking through the drawers, his suitcase, shit — an anxiety creeping through him in the moment as his chest beats faster, feeling like if he didn’t figure out that this Damn Thing Was he had this Feeling he still needed, if he didn’t get there fast enough, well then…an empty, sick ass hollow feeling moving through the pit of his stomach, even though he doesn’t let his brain finish the thoughts, instead, moving into his bedroom, trying to remember…remember…aha! It Hits Him as he opens his closet, his hands moving past the clothes towards…until he hears Zippy’s voice cut through the freight train of his thoughts at the moment, almost…his hands resting on the hoodie he was about to move aside, before…looking fully at Zip, his brow creasing a bit even as he tries to put on a little smile in spite of…moving to take the hoodie down from its place. “Found it,” he offers, with a little wispy attempt at a half-smile, as he shows her the hoodie with his high school logo on it, with KELLY HIGH WILDCATS emblazoned around it, a small laugh moving from him in spite of it all, of course it Would be a cat that was their mascot, town couldn’t let KK just name the Town after him without giving him Something as a punishment for being a meanie panini, right? He internally jokes to himself, even as the thought of KK in the moment makes him…kinda sad, letting Zippy take in the hoodie, before handing it to her. “Something to prove KK really is a 90s cheer movie legend, and…something to wear when I’m gone, so it’s like a…hug from me always when you wear it,” he attempts to explain, sheepishly scratching behind the back of his neck as his tone gets soft, quiet, that !! in his brain to see if what he thought was in the Secret Spot was Still There falling by the wayside as he looks at Zip, his lip twitching a bit as he..blinks his right eye to stop the few little tears threatening to form there, bad tears, as he waits for her to try it on…

Zippy quietly steps out of the way as Jaden keeps tossing things around and looking under stuff…kinda wondering if she should just…let him do his thing turning to go…Somewhere maybe ask Lynn if he—turning around to look back towards Jaden as he hears him talking…to her? looking at the hoodie and to Jaden…and back to the…hoodie, was she s’pose to…wear it? she wonders to herself Uh…the right corner of her lips twitching a bit until she just crosses her arms over herself and draws her tank top off  reaching out to replace it with the hoodie ooof pushing her head through and retugging on the colorfully messy bun that had fallen off the top of her head during the whole thing…folding her arms and doing one of Kelly’s judge-y eye looks from memory, pulling on his voice, or her interpretation of it anyway, “I don’t know, how’s it look? Is it Cash Money of Me?” She asks super Serious as she hits some Drama poses fit for the Kelly Catwalk (or the sims cas…prolly that more than the other thing but still…) before she moves her arms like an Egyptian bobbing her head as she keeps the same face, this is soooo cheerleader she thinks to herself.

J quickly blinks away the little bit of tears that were forming like   they weren’t even there, doing a quick subtle wipe with his thumb even   as a little smile peeks through him at the whole Look and Attitude,   feeling like she was totally Nailing it, a small little chuckle moving   from him before remembering !! wait, hmhm…an  idea moves into his mind. “So cash money, but as the head cheerleader, I  gotta ask you something…” He begins, before adding… “Close your  eyes….” Waiting for her to do so before using the moment to finally  move the clothes backkkk, giving the trick knock to the one board in the  back of the closet, opening up his Secret Spot, doing a Pretend I Don’t  See It to some of the Other Shit that was in there, not right now,  before pulling out the Envelope, his lip twitching a bit as he looks at  it before…trying to quietly release a breath, putting the board back  in its place before moving over to the desk, setting the envelope  between two books that happened to be there for now, who the fuck even  knew what they were, probably something boring from school he didn’t  really get, before…he finds It, his lips curling upwards a bit, before  letting Zip know she could open them, revealing the photo of him on Grad Day.  “Soooo…would the head cheerleader have still wanted to be with this   Loser?” he teases out a bit, a little snort moving through him as he   looks at his doofy ass younger self before…a bit of pride moves  through him as he looks at it again in spite of himself…hey, he  finished, and no one could really knock that…right?

A sly smile slides along the leftmost side of Zippy’s lips as she hears the chuckle pressing her hands softly over her eyes as she waitsssssssssswaaaaaitswaiiiiiiits…blinking her eyes open as she hears the Signal coming face to face with a throaty chuckle barely escaping past her lips, poking her finger into her right dimple as she puts on her thinking Face, “I don’t Knowwww…can he like, Cuddddle…” She wonders aloud taking the chance to loop her arms around his as she looks up at him, wriggling her eyebrows a little…

A half-smile moves onto J’s lips as he hears Zippy’s answer, a chuckle accompanying it as he looks down at the picture, that dumbass,  even as a lil bit of pride, as a Treat, maybe, moves through him,  contemplating it for a second. “Don’t think he had learned the true Art  of it yet, but…feel like maybe he grew up to, because he had The Best  Teacher?” He offers, the little smile peeking upwards onto J’s lips as  his gaze moves from the picture to her, before setting it down, moving  to robotically move his arms a bit… “Cuddle. Bot. Engage?” He speaks  to her in a robotic monotone, waiting for her command.

A knowing smirk flashes at the very edges of Zippy’s lips as she hears about the Mysteryyyyy Sensei, whoever SHE WAS…the robo voice coming in full effect as she untangles her arms her lips pushing from side to side as she thinks for a sec…“Come down here…” She instructs after a beat of a moment waiting for Jaden or…CuddleBot 9000 series X…to get closer…clossssser, reaching out to suck on his cheek a bit before finally blowing a loud raspberry along it and wrapping her arms around him as she looks up with her cheeks migrating up up up and awaaaaay…“One REAL cuddle before you Go…?”

“Understood…” Jaden robotically complies as be moves closer to Zippy, totally breaking character as a smile naturally brightens his lips at the raspberry, letting out an easily chuckle, before drawing Zippy into a full, consuming kiss, a deep, warm affection laced into it, before drawing back, a warm, light chuckle moving though his lip, that lil smile still there, just because… “Remeber Sensei saying something about Kiths, too…gotta have those before you go, right?” He asks, before a small feeling of loss moves through him at the end of the Kith… “One more…for Luck?” He asks with a little sheepish smile, really feeling…like he would Need It, where he was going. 

A lazyyyyyyy smile curls happily onto Zippy’s lips as she blinks open her eyes, keeping her head tilted as she finds his hand with her own back stepping to theeeeee…ooopfh…okaaaay…There it was…feeling the side of the bed against her back, sitting on top of it as she moves Jaden’s hand along with hers….swaaaaaying, “You have to lay down for it to be a Cuddle…”

“Cuddlebot. Acknowledges.” Jaden affirms in the robotic monotone, trying to get back into character, moving to lay down beside Zippy, robotically opening his arms for her. “Cuddle. Bot. Engage?”

Zippy settles in to J—CuddleBot’s arms her chest slowly Rising….and falling…inching her way closer forward as her eyes drift closed in no hurry as her lips softly press against his neck…something in her mind switching as she starts to suck on it a little not too Hard buuuut just trying it outttt…then another spot…and another….until she shifts gears and settles onto his cheek, just Kisses, this time…eventually…slowly her lips meeting his…her tongue playfully joining the frayyyy…getting caught up in the whole thing for a while until she realizes Just How Hot She Was…untangling herself for a bit as she sits on top of Jaden…drawing the hoodie over her head after a few pullllls…letting out a wooo of a breath before laying the hoodie onto Jaden and lying back down ontop of him…feeling his arm around her…kinda wondering if he could Blow On Her…but…scratching her fingernails lightly along the side of his head. “it’s gonna be ok…”

Jaden’s eyes softly close as he feels the sensations on his neck, them feeling mhmmmm good, almost wanting it Harder, yeahhh, before the sudden reminder shocks and rings through his mind like a bullet that it would be Bad, badbadBad, if there were any marks, fuck..an involuntary momentary jerk moving though him at that Thought before…softly kissing Zippy’s cheek, and then pressing his lips to hers for a few beats, not wanting to think what she did was Bad or anything, no, it was Good, it was just…a dumbass guilt chewing through him even as he tries to relax again, to cuddle with her, to just…be in the moment, before…closing his eyes again, taking in Zippy’s words, wondering…Was it going to be Okay? Was it Ever going to be Okay? Before releasing a soft breath up into the air, his eyes opening as his gaze meets Zippy’s, that ngnhhhh unwanted feeling moving through him again, fuck, before… “What if it Isn’t? …Ever,” he replies back, his gaze falling as his tone gets quieter as the last words come out of his lips, feeling that kind of…empty feeling, that he got sometime, when…he remembered how kinda fucked everything was, how kinda fucked…he really was, no matter how much he tried to forget it.

Zippy moves her head a bit as she wonders if the stuff from before was no good…a little confused but…still feeling his arms around her, turning to the side as she hears his voice, was that the Wrong thing to have said Too…? feeling like that’s always what you were Supposed to say from T.V. shit…her lips pushing a bit to the side as she doesn’t know how to follow up…urghhhh…“Frog…” Her mind mutters out, frog!?!? Zippy you dumbass….ughhhhhh…“Frog exist, so, things…get better.” She tries to piece together, hopelessly, but…damn…this was Hard….quietly moving her hands underneath Jaden’s back and just defaulting back to hug…cuddle…hug maybe since kith and TALKING was not the Way…a sad day.

Frog…frog…the words cut through the edges of Jaden’s thoughts as he…blinks his eyes for a moment, snapping out a bit from the train down which they were taking him, looking up at her, something…striking him, in the moment, for whatever fucking reason, but… “When I get back…wanna go find a frog? Catch it and…take it home? And maybe…make things just a lil bit better…because…Frog?” He struggles out, his words coming out a jumbled mess even though it made sense in his head, fuck…a sheepish lil…something crossing his lips, fuck, J, you dumbass, shit, what the fuck was That…

Zippy sits up moving her long strands of her hair a bit to the side so she didn’t end up choking Jaden on it or anything…shivering a little at the spooky thought…nodding her head softly, at first, before it gains a bit more warmth and excitement her dimples poking through as she leans over him…her smile slowly wannnning. “…could I…have a kithhhhh first?” She asks…sort of outright, but mostly anxiously even as her voice remains soft, a whisper of a thing…not wanting to do a Wrong after the other Thing…s…figuring she would move so he could go after…or before if he didn’t Want To…her mind beginning to get all JUMBLED…

“Yeah….” Jaden lowly murmurs, his lips meeting Jets, softly, tentatively, not wanting to be a dumbass again, especially after everything, and all this shit and his own…dumb…fuckery before…naturally moving more deeply, fully, intently in the kiss, just kind of…getting lost in it, the feelings contained within it, dulling the thoughts pounding in his head like a warm shroud of hazy summer air before realizing…oh shit, was that…too much? “Was that…okay?” He lowly breathes out as he looks at her, just wanting it to…at least be That…okay, even if…everything else…wasn’t.

Zippy’s palm rests on Jaden’s chest feeling it move up…and down…second to her own catching her breathhhhhh and realasing a small one through her still parted lips, curling easily upwards as she nods her head…“You should go, now…while you cannnnn.” A bit of ghostly spookinesss moving into her tone at the end as she draws her leg over him and folds her legs in as she sits up on the bed and beside him, taking in Another breath, as a soft chuckle moves out of her, “…uhhh, because…because…I’ll kisthhh you more…not the other Thing.” She finds herself explaining, a little awkwardly, as another breath visibly leaves her…heheh…her attention roaming the floor as she leans to the side a bit trying to see where her shirt had drifted off to…

“While I…Can…” Jaden quietly breathes out, his tone unintentionally coming out a bit eerie, as the…Finality, of it all…kinda hits him, leaving his brain kinda..frozen, for a sec before it finally kinda just…reboots as he blinks his eyes, shaking off the thoughts and letting out a little laugh to try to play it off all cool, even as the thought nags through the corner of his mind… “…what other Thing?” He hears himself ask aloud, part of him wondering…how much she Knew, but also how Could she know, but also, feeling…kinda weird and bad, and like staring down the weight how…Trash he really was…at the mere, like…possibility…she…did.

HA HA, gotchaaaa! sweeping her hand down to grab the thin tank and balancing herself back over onto the bed as she moves to slip it back on and over her head, “…I was just kidding…don’t wanna stop you from your thing.” She lightly replies back as she moves her arms through next, breathing a sigh…not sure what she was meant to be doing…still…scratching the side of her head in thought…her lips ducking out some as she thinks…damn…“…Do you think I should try to make Lynn something to eat…or something?” She thoughtfully finds herself asking of Jaden looking sidelong at him, wondering if that would be Annoying or Helpful…or if she should just give him some space and stay out of the way…not sure how long Jaden was going to be, or when Nadya came back or….humphhh…

“You…don’t?” Jaden breathes out, it hitting him in a weird way in the moment as he gets off the bed, even though the rational part of him knew that wasn’t what she fucking Meant, but…moving to release a deep breath out his nostrils that he didn’t realize he was holding, he moves to grab the two books, Algebra and…fuckin’ some English thing, or whatever, what more mattered was what he had put between them, moving the books under his arms as he tries to think…think…think in response to Zippy’s question, his brain feeling like it was…short circuiting in the moment, like that cat biting down on the wire before… “Maybe…just…sing to him?” He offers out, before he could even Think about what he was saying, only to realize that was fucking stupid, what was fucking singing going to do when your dad was fucking Dead! Jesus fucking Christ J, you Idiot, as he moves to leave the room before stopping himself, taking…a small breath that didn’t seem to quite be able to fill the hole he felt in his chest in the moment, letting out a small, “…Sorry,” as he looks at Zippy, wondering if he should give her a kiss, or just… “…I love you,” he softly, quietly breathes out, a deep, heavy weight behind his words…an apologetic look crossing his features, because…what the fuck kind of comfort was That? To be loved by him…moving towards the door to grab his keys as he…heads out towards the car.

Zippy gives Jaden a Huh?!? Look not getting what he was talking about before just giving a shake of her head, it was Important or Something, right? quietly taking in his answer….??? pushing her lips up some, “Sure, yeah, ok.” She casually says out with another nod until he whips back around and….her lips briefly drifting upwards until…he’s Gone…letting out another sigh what the hell even was That? she wonders to herself the quiet of the place suddenly…super Loud…turning around and climbing back onto Jaden’s bed, curling her limbs up and innn as she rests her head sideways along the pillow…rubbing her eye as she just ?? she didn’t know…

Lynn sits at the kitchen table, just feeling…really hollow and empty, his eyes all red and puffy but like…he had cried out all of his tears, just feeling tired, and heavy, and…like so much had been sucked out of him, not quite able to will himself to move until he…sees Jaden head out, without Zippy…the thought registering in his brain that something felt Wrong…forcing himself to Get Up from the table and make his way towards Jaden’s room, catching sight of Zippy in there, all curled into a ball, a worry moving through him, even through the fatigue and heaviness clouding him in the moment. “…Can I?” He softly offers to her, wanting to help her in the same way that she had the night before, to…provide comfort to her, Something, whatever was going on…

A shiver moves through Zippy’s voice as she hears The Voice���it having startled the Shit out of her, drawing her arm from over her eyes as she moves back some to make room for Lynn, resting her hand underneath her head feeling her cheek push up some, “hie…” She softly says to him once he’s face to face with her, giving him a weak little wisp of a smile.

Lynn moves into the bed, his arms moving around Zippy as he soothingly moves his hand along her back, hoping it was providing some comfort to her, just holding her like that for a bit, before softly asking, “Is everything okay?”

A string of guilt moves slowly through Zippy as she hears the question, from Lynn…her brows pushing together…taking in a small breath and instantly letting it go as she feels the back stuff…feeling really nice, looking over at Lynn and his red puffy eyes…the frown coming back in full force as she gives a quick short nod of her head, drawing her arm around him and pulling him into a tight hug…

Lynn feels the tight hug, moving to hold Zippy close as he continues his comforting gestures, giving her a soft, gentle kiss on the top of her head. “It’s okay if you aren’t feeling okay, it’s Hard, I know, but…I’m here, okay?” He softly, gently reminds her, wanting her to Know That, whatever was going on, but not wanting her to feel any pressure to talk about it, knowing…sometimes just a comforting hug helped more than words could.

What the pretzel helltzelll?? That’s the STUFF she should be saying another deep sigh moving out of her at being so not Great….keeping her arms around him as she feels another breath move from, resting her chin onto his shoulder, “Me Too…”

Lynn comfortingly holds Zippy, taking solace in her words, just continuing to do so, until he wonders if there was something else he could do to help her feel better… “Is this good, or would an ice cream from Froggy’s help? Or…we could even go catch frogs?” He adds on, remembering how excited the Froggy’s mascot had made her the other night.

“This…This is Good…” Zippy softly, sleepily, answers after a bit of a delay, pressing a barely there kiss against his cheek…her brain working slow on the whole thing…just feeling kinda Tired with…with Everything…her eyes feeling heavy as her breathing softens even in this…heatwave…because of the heatwave? her mind not even giving her a response…

“We can just stay here, then,” Lynn replies, holding Zippy as he hears the sleepiness in her tone, staying by her side, feeling he could use a small nap, too, after everything…eventually feeling himself begin to drift off to sleep…

- Several Hours Later -

Jaden takes one last drag of his cigarette as he pulls his car into the little open area, feeling…mmphhhh, as he releases the plume of smoke into the air, just watching it…float there for a beat, feeling fucking Exhausted and fucking…like he was going to pound his head into a wall but also…fucking Sad and fucking…mmmphhh as he feels that feeling in the pit of his stomach that he had forgotten about, biting down on his lip a bit as he flicks the cigarette out the window, bobbing his head to the last riff of the Korn song playing before…oh fuck, moving to turn the car off and go over to the piece of grass where the cigarette was starting to catch it on fucking fire, moving to erratically stompstompSTOMP it out with the heel of his boot, a rush moving through him as he releases a breath through his nostrils, kicking the trash can over as he pounds his foot into a few times, a sick satisfaction moving through him with each little dent it takes before…letting out another breath, the empty, shitty, Hollow feeling returning to him, look what you did Now, J you dumbass piece of shit…actually looking down at the damaged trash can and the…mess now lying on the ground, fucking…trash, the word echoing in his mind, trash trash trash, pick it up you dumb fuck you lazy piece of shit, his thoughts cut in, even as he can’t…bring himself to do that, feeling like even more of a fucking loser as he leaves it be, his mind already coming up with some Excuse for why the trash was like that, a stupid excuse, as he…oh fuck, moving to grab the…y’know, from the car, staring at it for a few moments, his fingertips tracing the little J there in the middle, written in those old timey letters that always made things seem so much fancier as he…as he…feeling the hot tears begin to fall from his cheeks as his face scrunches up, don’t cry, don’t you fucking dare cry, you pussy, His tone overtaking in the middle of it as he feels a sickness and softness comingling within him as he folds his arms across his chest, his free hand gripping his bicep as his fingers dig in, fucking fuck fuck FUCK YOU! as he kicks his foot HARD into the tire of his car, feeling the hot jolt of pain in recoil come right back on it even as he goes in again and again and again, the hot tears moving down his cheeks, fuck, fuck, fuck….the pain suddenly registering more fully as his back slides down along is car, his ass connecting with the ground he cranes his head back, the white hot pain now echoing through his body, his brain, as he blinks the stupid fucking fuck ass tears from his eyes, or attempts to, just…sitting there in fucking defeat in the moment, not able to will himself to get up, feeling like…this was fucking It, he was going to Die Here, no you’re not you ridiculous fucking piece of shit get up, no, he was going to Die Here, and it was Okay, his teeth biting down harshly on his bottom lip as he lets out an ssssss hiss of pain through his teeth…

Lynn feels himself suddenly move back into consciousness as he hears the  music outside…was that…Korn?  rubbing his eye as he wonders if  Jaden was back from…wherever he had  gone, the strike of worry moving  back into him as he rubs the sleep out  of his eye, still feeling heavy  and drained from everything, but…the  nap did help, hoping the same  for Zippy, as he watches her stir as well,  hoping she hadn’t been woken  up too early…”Did J say where he was  going?” He asks, a his tone  quiet and soft, aware that Zippy was just  waking up again, hearing the  sound of the music slowly subside.

Zippy squints some as she blinks once twice three times for each eye as she quells the immideate urge to rub her eyes rawwwww…her face feeling really hot….shaking her head some as she sits up trying to remember where She Was…climbing off the bed after some time and making her way into the bathroom…filling up the sink with cold water and stopping it up…sinking her hands in first…ahhh…rubbing them and some of the water along her forearms until she bends over some and rubs it along her forehead and cheeeks…it starting to help her out someeee….whew. Rubbing a damp cold hand along the back of her neck and slowly making her way outside of the bathroom…

Lynn watches as Zippy wordlessly makes her way off the bed, a frown threatening to crease on his lips even as he forces it to stay off, moving himself off the bed as he rubs his eye trying to find his shoes…sliding them on, before catching sight of Zippy outside the bathroom. “I’m…going to see if J is back…if you want to come?” He offers, giving her a little warm smile as he cocks his thumb towards the door. “But you don’t have to, if you don’t want to…” He adds, not wanting her to feel pressured, or anything, if she wasn’t up for it, knowing she might just want to stay back and try to relax, after everything…the full everything he wasn’t sure of, hoping that Jaden hadn’t…put more on Zippy’s plate, or that they hadn’t had a fight, or something like that…

Zippy tiredly nods her head, moving past him for a sec as she opens the fridge to grab one of the waters placing it underneath her arm…ooooooh. Her hand absentmindedly scratching her thigh as she bends down to replace the water she had taken out, uncapping the cold one and taking a deep drink from it as she presses her back against the door of the trailer and makes room for Lynn to go outside, sluggishly following after him…

Jaden hears the door open through the corners of his consciousness  moving to…ughhhhh, feeling the wetness on his face, moving to harshly,  quickly, wipe that shiit away before he remembers he was holding…!!…forcing himself up, ooffff, up and attem, you dumbass J, why the fuck did you do that, even as the !!! to  put the you-know-what back into the car overriding that shit in the  moment, setting it back between the books before turning around to see  Zippy and Lynn, casual, keep it casual, J, giving a little grin as he  locks the car, twirling the keys around his finger even though he felt  like he could use a fucking drink, fuck, No, no, no fucking drinks, J, not now, you Idiot, “So…wanna  go find that frog?” He asks, forcing his lip upwards to give off a  casually toothy grin, spinning the key a few more times before putting  it in his pocket, feeling like everyone could use a good, lighthearted  distraction, not Drinks, J, stupid, even as the thought probes through his mind again…

Zippy gives Jaden a little easy wave as she sees him seeming like whatever he Had To Do Helped, a brief twitch of a frown moving across her face at not being able To…the edges of her lips finding themselves pushed up again as she rubs her throat it kinda feeling really dry and ouchy, trying to clear it some eughhhhh! “Can…*cough* …Can we get ice cream first?” 

“Everything okay?” Jaden asks as he hears the cough move from Zippy,   before taking in her request, a little smile crossing his lips as he looks between both of them… “Froggy’s?” He posits, trying to keep the smile up even as he feels the exhaustion begin to really set in, fuck, moving to take out his keys again, give it a lil few twirls, yeah, all good, all chill, casual, easy J was back in the houseeee, moving to unlock the car before !!!! Oh FUCK. He recalls the…the…call it by what it is, J, you dumbass, even as the word still dances along the edge of his consciousness without fully being able to give life to it, moving to…reach back over to grab the shit, the…high school text books, wow, J, real big brained hiding place right there…moving to kinda…stash the shit under the back seat, pretend I don’t see it real smooth like, before doing a playful bow… “Your carriage awaits, Pillow Princess and Ser Lynn…I am but your humble servant for the day…”

Zippy nods her head giving Jaden a little smile, it was cool just probably slept with her mouth open again or something, swallowing kinda hard eugh…taking another drink of water and swallowing a little Better. “Coool…” She casually responds back, giving him another smile at the bow before she hops inside and moves her arms up, placing the water bottle between her thighs and raking her fingers through her hair a few times as she makes a New Ponytail sleep having totally DEMOLISHED the last one…a real Fighter, even still. Reaching her arm across to grab the seatbelt and click it in place as she settles back in the seat squinting her eyes some as she reaches out to get the little sun protector thing that never really HELPED but…sometimes, y’know?

Jaden hops into the car, a little smile crossing his lips as he looks over at Zippy, and then back to Lynn, moving to pull out and drive towards Froggy’s, feeling like everyone could need some relaxation and chill after everything that had happened that day...wanting to turn off his brain and just...live his life, y’know?

-WHEN YOU DIE COMPLETE-

[syaniides]

The Lake [July 11, 2020]

IN PROGRESS

Lynn furrows his brows as he triesssss to finagle the last wily lil’ bit of shit into his suitcase, his lips pursing together as he tries to recall if he was Forgetting anything, moving to reply to a quick text from A, a little smile tugging upwards as he reads the words, before....deciding he needed a break, his saucer-blue eyes turning towards Zip...Zip, hehe, what a cute name, a smile spreading across his lips as he watches her sit on Jesse’s old bed...her bed while she was staying here, before moving to help her out in holding her phone up towards one of the sweet spots where there was a half decent signal in the trailer...”Gotta get it juuuust so. There you go,” he easily, warmly drawls out as a wide grin moves across his lips, before sitting down next to her. “Jesse helped find That One,” he offers out with a little laugh, before...”You wanna go and head out to the Enchanted Lake?” He floats outttt, looking up at her with his big blue eyes as he tries to gauge her reaction to the idea.

Zippy lets out a little soft sigh as she tries to get more than one bar, the whole thing making her anxiety shoot through the roof...along with waiting for her switch to charge, animal crossing being her one saving grace.....her lips curling downward as she is about to just Give Up and maybe take a Nap....or try too, feeling kinda slugggy...and sticky....until she feels her arm moved some and sees the four?!?! bars and feels the vibrations begin to rumble within her hand, ahhhhhhhhh!!!! her curiosity to the World coming back full force as she tries to look while keeping her hand still, ahhh, this was Torturé...flopping back onto the bed, wah, slightly shifting her attention towards Lynn, “the what of the whattttt?” She softly gasps out...

“The Enchanted Lake...” Lynn lets out in a feather-soft whisper, his eyes twinkling with a warm mystique, the smile remaining steady on his lips... “...That J doesn’t even know about, do you want to see?” He asks, keeping his voice low as he looks both ways before speaking. “It’s Jesse’s special secret spot...”

“Enchanted. Lake. Hmmm...” Zippy repeats to herself, opening her eyes as her arm drapes across her stomach, “Are you saying you wannnnna...Sneak Out....?”

“If you’ll come with me...?” Lynn warmly offers out, the grin spreading on his lips before...”And...I have something else secret, if you promise you won’t tell?” He offers in a low whisper, putting his finger to his lips.

Zippy sits up on her forearms someeee...looking towards the door briefly, looking back at Lynn, “What is it?”

“Just somethinggg...” Lynn hums out, twirling on his heel a bit to close the door behind him, before moving into Jesse’s old drawer, looking for the false bottom trick he had taught him...aha! Before finding the little bag he had stored inside with a few other things, holding up the little baggies of weed, shaking it a little, his eyes lighting up a bit as he presents it. “...to add to the magic. But if you don’t wanna, it’s totally cool, too,” he warmly reminds, not wanting to pressure her, or anything, if it wasn’t her thing.

Wowwwww...that kinda wasn’t what she was expecting at all as she sees the little baggies, sitting up all the way as she moves her palms together in a barely audible clap, looking at the small window at the top and the sun shineeeeee, turning back to Lynn, her lips curling up into a little smile, “...so what is the plan?”

“We need to make sure Jaden is distracted first and then...we sneak out and I’ll show you the way,” Lynn deduces, as a playfully mischievous smile crosses his lips, lightly stroking his chin in a Thoughtful manner. “Any thoughts for the Distraction...?”

Zippy’s legs swing in the air some hmhmhmhmmmm, “...Maybe...you wanna Go First and I’ll cover you?”

Lynn’s brows furrowed back and forthhhh as he mulls over the idea in his head, mmmhmmmhmmm, before the corners of his lips cock upwards as he gives Zippy a thumbs up, ready for the plan to be A Go.

Zippy draws her hands up giving a double thumbs up as she moves off the bed and into the the hallway to where Jaden was...as she covers Lynn to make his way...Outsideeee...moving in front of him as she tries to see what he was Doing. “Hey. Is your mom...here?” She asks the last part coming out softly as her head swivels around some...

Jaden lays on his old bed, absentmindedly flipping through one of the books he had lying around, some photography book that Lynn had gotten him by someone he Used to like but now...he half-heartedly flips to the next page, before tilting his head up as he hears Zippy’s voice, shaking his head a bit, before holding his arms out open for her.

Zippy rests her knee onto the bed using it to boost her so she could straddle over Jaden, moving into his arms as she lies down ontop of him pressing a kiss along the side of his face, “...you ok?”

“Just...tired,” Jaden murmurs out, everything just being kind of being A Lot, being back home, trying to help out with all the shit, Lynn’s shit, and...he lets out a breath, knowing it was what he Should be doing, that his mom shouldn’t have to go through it all alone....nuzzling into Zippy as he rests his head next to hers, holding her tight and just...taking comfort in the moment.

Zippy moves her hand into Jaden’s shirt gently moving it along his side as she presses another kiss against his temple, “Let’s take a Napppp...” She lowly declares feeling like he sounded like he could use One, figuring Lynn could wait a lil until Jaden was asleep before showing her the Secreeets...

“Okay...” Jaden concedes, feeling like he Should be helping Lynn pack but just feeling...not quite up for it as he softly closes his eyes, snuggling in with Zippy, a gentle relief moving over him....

Zippy gives Jaden one last little kiss, this time on his cheek as her nose presses against it settling in as she keeps up her hand motions gooooing trying to help him sleeeeeep....blinking her eyes open as she tries to ummmm rubbing her eye as she looks over to see Jaden sleeping, awww sleepy faaaace, slowly drawing her hands back to herself as she tries to figure out how to rollll out of here...somehow managing and jussst barely missing the fall, letting out a little breath at her gymnastics whoa, looking back over at Jaden pressing her lips gently on his forehead and slipping outside of his room and out of the trailer, seeing Lynn still there. “Ta-daaa...”

Lynn raises his phone in the aiiir, trying to get enough of a signal to send his reply text to Az, whistling a bit of one of the songs that she had recently sent him to himself before his gaze shifts over to see Zippy there, ta daaa, an easy, full smile spreading across his lips. “You Ready?” He asks, a toothiness peeking into his smile as a bit of excitement and playful mischief dances in his expressive blue eyes.