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anundyingfidelity · 6 months ago

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HAPPY MISTAKE — Logan Howlett

Summary: Not ever, through all the years of your life, you found someone like Logan. Since he arrived at the school, something brought you together like a magnet. Sadly, not everything came out as you wished it would be. Time is not gentle with mutants, and you try so hard to show him your unconditional love before everything is over, but can you finally accept your feelings for each other? Or yours and Logan's tumultuous relationship through the years.

(PART ONE → PART TWO) | GEN MASTERLIST!

Pairing: Logan x mutant!female!reader.

Word count: 9.6k.

Warnings: slow burn, breaking up(?)/making up, heavy angst, hurt/comfort, eventual smut and unprotected everything, language, character death, time travel, Logan hurting reader unintentionally, wounds and blood. Logan being a whore for both Jean Grey and the reader. Reader has slow aging as Logan and looks around mid 30s in my head. Anthropology teacher!reader. Reader can manipulate light (just like Starlight from The Boys). This takes place between different movies from the franchise, from X-Men 1 to DoFP, so spoilers of the movies ahead.

Notes: Long time no write. Life is horrible but somehow I managed to get this in like two months. I love Logan so fucking much now you don't have an idea. This was also written with Happy Mistake by Lady Gaga in mind. If you'd like to be tagged in the second part let me know or let me know your thoughts on this, it's very much appreciated! I suffered a lot writing it .

𝒊𝒇 𝒊 𝒄𝒐𝒖𝒍𝒅 𝒇𝒊𝒙 𝒕𝒉𝒆 𝒃𝒓𝒐𝒌𝒆𝒏 𝒑𝒊𝒆𝒄𝒆𝒔, 𝒕𝒉𝒆𝒏 𝒊'𝒅 𝒉𝒂𝒗𝒆 𝒂 𝒉𝒂𝒑𝒑𝒚 𝒎𝒊𝒔𝒕𝒂𝒌𝒆.

—

2000

“Need any help?”

Logan stopped on his tracks from wandering around the cozy, yet strange place he woke up in. Turning on his feet, he saw your figure standing in the middle of the hallway. He said nothing, but you approached him as you had known him for a very long time.

“I assume you’re the new guy-”

“Where is she?” Logan abruptly interrupted once you stood inches away from him.

“Rogue? She’s fine. And you need to take a little rest.”

“I don’t need medical attention,” he said, looking around to search for a nearby exit. Before he walked away you took his arm in a soft grip.

He was, as much as you could tell, surprised by your boldness. You gave him no time to process his next movements once you talked again, your voice firm and welcoming in a way he had never felt before.

“Please, you need to meet Professor Xavier,” you said. “At least before you go. It’s totally fine if you wanna leave, I don’t recommend it though, but we can offer you a safe place here. We are just like you.”

Logan’s hardened expression relaxed for a moment, sensing no threat coming from you. All he saw in your eyes wasn’t pity, nor anger at him being kind of an asshole at first. It was just authority, the good kind where he also had something to say and decide about.

“Whatcha say, Logan?”

He was so immersed in his thoughts before you called his name, thinking it sounded beautiful falling off your lips. You gave him a half smile as he took in each detail of your face, as if he was memorizing every part of it.

It was the first time someone had been nice to him and it felt strangely good.

For some reason, it felt very good coming from you.

—

Logan just found out from the Professor’s mouth the mansion was a school for mutants. Gifted people, he called them. After learning another powerful mutant was behind him and Rogue, he had no other choice but accept the shelter. He didn’t like the other guys better, playing the teacher with a bunch of teenagers with special or cursed abilities. But besides Storm and Jean, you were the person who had welcomed him the most, even showing him the place and the room he would stay in.

One late night, you sat at the dining table together. Logan was silently drinking a beer outside school hours so the kids wouldn’t see him, and you, reading a bunch of papers from your students that you were missing. He realized how hard you worked, how you would praise your students, how you talked to them outside classes, being the one to actually convince Rogue to enroll in the school. Immediately, he knew you were really something, having much more in common than he thought. And you, living for so long, being both a mutant and a lady for sure had a hard life through time.

“What you teach again?” he suddenly asked, breaking the comfortable silence you shared.

“Anthropology,” you answered, giving him a short glance. “I took this at college a long time ago, and I’ve been alive long enough to know a thing or two,” you explained, putting away a paper after putting an A+ on it proudly. “It’s important to understand ourselves, humankind and mutants… It’s a diverse world and there are lots of cultures, languages and societies we don’t get to know, but it’s beautiful. I think I like to celebrate what makes us unique. I've had the chance to study some of them around the world since I had the time, y’know, and it’s truly amazing. It’s a shame we have to fight between us to make us heard when we could just be kind and empathetic to each other… Sorry, you didn’t ask but, y’know, anyway.”

You shook your head with a curve on your lips, going back to the next paper. Logan had taken the sparks in your eyes as you talked. He half smiled to himself once you buried yourself in your papers again, thinking you sounded just like Professor Xavier. No wonder why he took you in. Probably, if things were different for him, he would’ve found something that could light his face with so much passion just like you did.

“Been alive for almost two hundred years,” Logan said and you looked up to him. “We might have things about the past to share,” he drank from his beer. It was your turn to smile back at him.

“Yeah, well, I’ve lived both horrible but nice things. Couldn’t read or do math without being called a witch,” you chuckled to yourself, but hiding on the inside the awful experiences you had to endure. “Someday, we could go out and grab a coffee or something,” you said with a playful smile.

A light chuckle left your lips, but you and him knew it wasn’t just a joke.

He joined you with a warm smile that lit up his face before disappearing from his lips. “Of course. Count me in.”

—

The sun was shining bright and the weather was great that morning. Some of the students were in the yard playing, having some quality time, and others simply just left to go to the town. It was a good weekend before the next semester started, and it was better now knowing Magneto had been taken to prison after his failed attempt to use Rogue for his plans.

Sipping on your coffee, you saw the students outside. Laughing, running, having a good breakfast picnic. It felt heartwarming just taking this sight, wishing it would always be like this. Your mindful peace was interrupted when Logan entered the kitchen to have a coffee on his own. Visibly, you tensed just a little when he approached you and sat right in front of you at the dining table. The caffeine was not helping at all, you thought.

“Morning,” he greeted you, noticing something was off on you, but hoping it would pass. Maybe you already knew.

“Morning…” your voice came out as a whisper. “How you feeling?”

“Better. What about you?”

You gave a small nod. “Good, thanks for asking.”

A silence fell upon you. Not like the ones you used to share in lonely nights where you prepared your classes and Logan just sat down calmly because he couldn’t sleep. This time it was different. Words won’t come out of your mouth to ask what was really bothering you. You had grown up to like Logan and enjoy his company, but he had a lot of walls upon him, protecting himself of the world and people around him.

However, you understood why he did it. You both have been alive longer than anyone else. You saw people you love dearly dead, being killed because of your flaws. And you really connected to his idea of protecting people by leaving their side. It was better being away. That was until Professor Xavier recruited you. Here, you had a purpose and you helped young people to become the best versions of themselves. You wished Logan could do the same, stay and see he was more of what he thought of himself, but it wouldn’t happen. Right? He had things to sort out on his own.

“Are you leaving soon?”

When you asked the question, Logan knew you had heard something from the Professor. He gave you a nod.

“I need to reconnect with who I was,” he simply answered.

“Right… Wish you all the best there.”

Logan had grown to like you over the past few weeks you shared, exchanging experiences and lessons of life you had taken through the years. For a moment, he looked right into your eyes and smiled. He weirdly smiled, and you could swear he’d miss you too once he is away.

But that warm feeling soon faded away once Jean walked into the kitchen, saying good morning and beaming to the both of you. Logan followed her with his gaze, straightening himself on his seat as she served her own breakfast and an extra plate that you already knew was for Scott. She also began putting fruits and snacks inside a picnic basket while looking all happy and settled, and you knew why Logan had fallen in love with her. It was all over his face.

And you wondered how could he act and talk to you so kindly and sweet, and then look at Jean like that. It was a pain in your heart you tried to dissipate. Everyone knew Jean and Scott were a couple, and the fact that Logan had a not so secret crush on her really played on you. It made you feel like a fool and you had too many heartbreaks and hurted people, putting them in danger due to your mutation, to take initiative and start a relationship - or anything of the sort - again.

Scott made his way inside the kitchen, saying hi to both of you - mostly you. And took the tray with their plates as Jean grabbed the basket, but she let Scott leave the kitchen before.

“Have a good trip, Logan,” she said kindly. “I hope to see you around here soon.”

“Thank you, Jean.”

She smiled one last time before leaving you all alone, Logan following her with his eyes. Just for a second, you wished he could see you like that underneath his facade.

—

You had packed your stuff later that day, deciding a little air and a change for one night would do no wrong. Just as you were walking to the main door, Rogue was saying her goodbyes to Logan after giving him a small hug without really touching him. It was a cute sight how Rogue was able to step into his cold heart. She said goodbye to you as well before leaving the entrance.

“You’re going away too?” Logan asked, rather surprised as you both walked through the door, the sun hitting your skin as soon as you were out of the mansion. He knew your life was at the school.

“Just for the weekend,” you shrug it off.

Logan gave you a nod with a warm smile. “Then have a good trip and enjoy yourself.”

“Thanks. I hope you find what you’ve been looking for.”

“I hope so too,” Logan answered and before he went to take Scott’s bike, he looked at you hesitantly for a couple of seconds. “We should go out and grab some coffee once I’m back.”

Your lips formed a wide smile. “That sounds really nice.”

For a moment, where time felt like hours and not seconds, you stood right out the door, looking at each other. You wanted him to go first, but he was waiting for you to say something. Probably to ride the bike with him, he could leave you somewhere near your destination and feel you close - just be around you for at least five more minutes. But none of that ever happened.

Instead, you studied his face, looking at his deep eyes, and then his lips - those lips you wanted to kiss so bad before, but never had the courage to do so. You didn’t think further, and if something had taken possession over you, you leaned towards him leaving a short, sweet kiss on the corner of his lips.

“Take care,” you mumbled once you pulled away.

Not waiting for his answer, you turned back, pulling your bag to your side stronger than ever and walked the path to the front gates, feeling his gaze all over you until you left the mansion.

He felt such an idiot for not kissing you properly.

—

2003

‘I know what I want, but what do you want?’

Mystique’s words echoed through his head. Logan left the tent so long ago he didn’t know what time it was anymore and the situation kept repeating again and again in his mind. The woman had shifted between Jean, Ororo, and you. The one that icked him the most being Rogue once Mystique had taken her figure in. Storm was a good colleague, Jean was a forbidden love, Rogue was like his little sister, someone he would protect as long as he could, and you… you were a different case. When Mystique was about to kiss him wearing your figure, he finally realized he started feeling things he had prohibited himself for a very long time, and he thought he shouldn’t. He really shouldn’t.

Once or twice you shared experiences about love and partners, but he could tell it hurted you the same way as him. He couldn’t burden breaking your heart, or worse, getting you hurt because of what he was. Logan knew you had the same bad luck in the past, but it didn’t stop any of you to pull towards each other like a magnet.

‘Living for so long does things to you, Logan. I feel we become more aware of what we are.’

Those words you said to him one time remained in his head like a warning, and he took it personally.

Closing his eyes, he leaned against a hard tree trunk some feet away from the tents where the rest of the X-Men rested. He tried to find some peace alone for a few moments when the sounds of steps approaching alerted his senses. Claws out and ready to attack, he spun around the trunk only to stop in a second.

There you were, a bright light emanating from your hand to illuminate your path in the darkness of the woods.

“Logan?”

Quickly, he withdrew his claws and his body relaxed visibly. “Sorry,” he apologized, leaning against the tree one more time.

“Are you okay?” you asked, but you already knew the answer. The exhausted sigh he let out told you everything you needed. You let the soft glow of light floating between you and him, to illuminate both of you under the branches. “You wanna talk?”

He slowly shook his head, mumbling ‘no’. He became startled in the light floating like a firefly, letting his own issues wash away with your sole company. Ironically, everything that was troubling him was you. Softly, you caressed his arm, taking him out of his own thoughts. Your touch didn’t help his poor mind either.

Looking worried about the next mission in Lake Alkali, you feared for him and your team. And your lack of sleep was showing it. But just like Logan, the growing feelings were troubling your head. You had seen him talking with Jean earlier when you landed in the forest - talking too close to your liking once he pulled her for a kiss. But what could you do? Logan was still after Jean even when she had already declined him countless of times, and it didn’t really hurt you. It just felt strange inside. Why would he do that while still being nice to you, quitting being a dick when he wanted because he knew you’d snap back at him. And to be honest, Logan looked as if he liked that about you. But he won’t admit it out loud, and of course, you wouldn’t ask. Men were so damn complicated.

“Well, I only expect things to not get worse…” you finally said in a soft whisper since he wasn’t talking and you stopped your head going further on the matter. And you knew he wouldn’t talk soon either. “And you’re brave for seeking your past.”

Logan locked his eyes with your own, under the soft light. Your tired gaze, your figure, your aura pulling him like he found a treasure in an abandoned cave… He felt so bad for falling for someone like you, who was nothing compared to the crap he was. And then, for the first time in years, he decided to follow his instinct with you.

He leaned towards your figure, his rough hand cupping your cheek gently before pulling you in for a kiss. With a soft sigh you corresponded, your arms around his neck as it turned deeper and harsher. Logan lifted you easily from the ground, your legs tangling around his waist until you felt your back against a rough surface, trapped between the trunk and his body. Soft moans and grunts mingled, your chest pressing against his own, his hips grinding against your crotch. It was obvious you wanted this. Logan desired you so painfully after that day you kissed him goodbye at the mansion, he needed your body and soul. But you had to have answers before giving into the heat of the moment.

Pulling away, you broke the kiss, your forehead resting against his own as you tried to catch your breath. Logan tried to taste you once again, but you placed two of your fingers on his swollen lips.

“Why’d you kiss her?”

He remained silent, brows furrowed and eyes blown in lust. You didn’t make any effort to pull him away. He still had you between his legs, asking a simple question he had no response for.

“We’re adults here, Logan. Just wanna know why before we go further.”

Logan started to remember. He vividly heard Jean and Mystique voicing out and asking the right question.

‘Girls flirt with the bad guy. They take the good guy home.’

‘What do you want?’

“Do you really want me?” he asked in return.

You lifted an eyebrow at his sudden question. “And do you?”

He leaned again for a kiss on your lips, and thankfully for him, you didn’t stop it. But he quickly pulled away and inhaled your sweet scent from the skin on your neck, leaving a path of soft pecks, until he nipped the shell of your ear softly. You shivered under his touch.

“I’d love to have you,” he whispered, softly caressing your cheek with his thumb.

“Come to my tent,” you mumbled. “Sleep with me. But like, seriously, sleep with me ‘cause I’m tired,” you chuckled, hoping to not kill the mood.

Logan smiled for a bit and nodded, pecking your lips one more time before helping you get on your feet on the muddy ground, hands rubbing your sides slowly.

“As long as I have you by my side it’s alright with me.”

—

Jean’s death was hard to swallow.

For weeks, students and teachers mourned her, and you felt sorry for Scott for losing his soulmate. Logan was not in the best shape either. He didn’t attend her funeral, he never had the guts to stand by her grave either, until now. You stopped right behind him and noticed him sighing, under the afternoon sunset. He was tense because of everything, but when you took his hand out of the pocket of his jacket, he held onto you. Your fingers intertwined together, feeling his life depending solely on you, like a rock he needed to support his whole weight.

The day was about to end, the sun slowly hiding, giving a beautiful painting of orange and purple in the sky. You thought it would soon become an intense thunderstorm due to Ororo’s mourn - something you had gotten used to the last few days.

“She saved us,” Logan barely mumbled, looking intensely at the grave.

You nodded, even if he could not see you. “Can’t blame her, I’d have done the same.”

Those words cause him to look back at you, wishing it’d be a lie. But inside, Logan knew you really had the guts to sacrifice yourself for others. It was something he remembered both of you talking about some time ago. And you would give everything in your hands to save the ones you love.

Quietly, Logan gave a last glance at Jean’s grave, and guided you inside the mansion. Classes barely started again due to the circumstances and a few kids could be seen around the halls. You accompanied him to the doors of his room, noticing you had been holding hands the whole time. Probably no one really cared, they were too busy trying to go through the grief of losing a loved one. Slowly, you broke the gesture, taking your hand away and Logan immediately missed the heat and comfort of your hand.

“Do you need anything?” you asked in a low voice.

Looking at you, Logan reminisced how you kissed in the woods, the need and lust for each other that couldn’t be. He did sleep in your tent that night, in the comfort of your arms, feeling the warmth of your skin. It was, probably, the first time he had a good, peaceful night of sleep in years. No one had brought that up, but he knew something was there. And he needed to act on it before it was too late.

So he brought up his hands to your face, cupping your cheeks lovingly before planting a kiss on your lips, not caring he was standing in the middle of the hallway where anyone could see what was going on. You leaned against his touch, deepening the kiss until you couldn’t catch a breath. When he pulled away, he pressed his forehead into yours, taking in the beauty of your bright eyes and swollen lips. Everything wandering his mind, making a path right into his cold heart was right in front of him.

“You.”

—

Knocking Professor Xavier's door, you walked inside as soon as his voice announced to come in. You caught your breath seeing Logan by his desk. He just gave you a quick, accomplice glimpse and left the room, closing the door behind. The exchange of glances wasn’t unnoticed by Charles.

“Here’s the report on my subject for this last semester, Professor,” you announced, leaving the folder on the wooden desk.

“Thank you. How’s Logan doing?” he asked all of a sudden, checking the door the man had crossed just seconds ago.

“Excuse me?”

“Do you believe he is comfortable helping the kids?” the old man asked again. He was seeing right through you, and you kind of hated every time he used to do that to you. Nothing could be hidden from Xavier; definitely you couldn’t hide a single thing for the man who took you in decades ago.

“Why would I know that?”

He shrugged it off. “Well, you seem very close lately.”

Close was not the best word to describe your relationship with Logan. Yet, you were sleeping on his bed just the night before. The trace of his kisses, the burn of his beard on your skin, his teeth biting softly your breasts, his rough hands all over your hips… Every touch he left on your body you could still feel it, and you wanted to think he was not just using you. During the past weeks, you were together. Not quite a relationship-thing was established properly, but it was the closest thing any of you could have as for now.

It was a mixture of grief, pain, and hope that had you both still standing. In the end, you understood what he felt. Being alone and alive for so long and then finding a place where people accepted you for who you were was a whole change, even if some years passed by. Though, the time Logan had been spending at the school was nothing but a blink of an eye compared to his past.

“What happened to our team is still affecting us,” you finally said. “I believe we are good friends, yes, we’ve been supporting each other. And he doesn’t know how to deal with the students yet most of the time, but I try to walk him through it.”

Xavier hummed, smiling at the corner of his lips as he eyed the folder you handed him. “I bet you both do.Thanks for bringing your report on time, as always, and I apologize if I am being intrusive. Just please be careful with the noises both of you make at night, we have kids around here.”

Shit.

You swallowed your pride right there and simply gave a nod, feeling the heat burning up your face.

“Will do, Professor.”

—

A loud gasp escaped your lips as you held for dear life on his broad shoulders, hips snapping against your own. His pace was reckless, keeping you on the edge of sin. Grunts mixed with sweet moans, skin hitting skin again and again every time you felt his cock inside you. If possible, your nails could have already left visible scars and marks on his back, scratching and bleeding off his skin as he fucked you senseless.

Logan sucked on the bare skin on your neck, inhaling your scent, feeling your walls clenching around his girth, his hands roughly grabbing the sides of your hips as you moaned his name, over and over, under the moonlight. He looked at you intensely with loving eyes when you came underneath him, eyes flashing that familiar bright light every time a powerful orgasm hit your body. The vulnerable sight of your figure shaking, eyes closing slowly and biting your lip to keep the pretty noises low, made him reach the sweetest high.

With a grunt, he leaned to attack your lips in a heated, wet kiss to moan against your mouth. Logan pulled back to press butterfly kisses on your jaw, until he reached your breasts, feeling himself soften inside your wet heat. His hips were still thrusting just enough to fill you up at a gentle rhythm. Marking you his and only his.

“Fuck, you’re so beautiful,” he mumbled against the sensitive skin of your chest. “Remind me why we’re here again.”

You chuckled softly, fingers tangling on his disheveled hair. You just had prepared a small date night out at the shores of a beautiful lake in the woods. No one could bother you if you were alone, and since your relationship was not so secret anymore, you needed him in a place that wasn’t the school. So here you were, laying on your back, fully naked on the picnic blanket, with the Wolverine between your legs, enjoying the calmness of the water, the green grass, the crickets singing around, and the cold of the night.

“Privacy perhaps?” you whispered as his eyes locked on yours.

Softly you touched his cheek with the palm of your hand and he rolled both of you over, until you laid on top of him, legs straddling his waist and your arms on his shoulders to sit on his lap. Silence took over, his hands soothing your hips and the marks he left on your body from the intense love-making.

“I’m so happy we took a couple of days off…”

You waited for Logan to say something. Anything. You wanted to continue, to tell him how you really felt. Instead, you decided it was better leaving it like this. Logan gave you a nod, pulling you for a short kiss.

“Yeah. Me too.”

He wanted to say it out loud, but was too scared to do so.

—

2006

After a couple of long years, the school and the team had to learn how to go through the grief and pain Jean left. Logan had a hard time processing it, just like all your teammates, specially Scott, and of course the students. It didn’t stop you from moving on as time went by though, always remembering her for the great person and mind she was. Going forward and keeping fighting is what she would’ve wanted for everyone, even now that a certain cure for mutants was announced to the public.

You tried to continue your life as a professor at the school, training students, leading young people, and you invited and encouraged Logan to do so countless times. Deep inside, you wished it was you the reason why Logan decided to stay and train young mutants - for you to be the answer to his loneliness. That he knew, for once and all, that he was not alone. You got each other, and you could do something about it. Words unspoken said more than anything, at least you thought so.

It was one of those rare nights where you got some time for yourselves, walking around the city after having a nice and calm dinner. Your shoulders brushed against each other while you walked downtown, your hands hiding inside the pockets of your jacket, protecting them from the cold.

There was a lot on your mind lately, thinking about what you two really were. If there was a stronger feeling in between, or if it was solely because he enjoyed your company and that was it. Both had lived enough to know there was a feeling in the middle. It wasn’t just friends with benefits, or co-workers who sleep together three times a week. Something was blooming deep inside you, but you tried to not give it a lot of attention all those years. Still, it felt like it had to be addressed sooner or later, and this could be the time. In the end, you understood each other perfectly. How painful it was, how living longer than anyone was, how you had to leave everything and everyone behind because you were dangerous…

“Have you ever wondered how’d it feel to have a normal life?” your question came out all of the sudden.

“How come?” He looked at you from the corner of his eye.

You didn’t know if his gaze was judging you but you continued anyway.

“Like living a normal amount of years… Not having these things, genes that make us different. Or special…”

Logan suddenly stopped in his tracks and grabbed your arm softly so you could lock eyes together as he asked. “You’re not thinking of getting that damn cure, aren’t you?”

“Of course not!”

“Then why’d you think that?”

“Because I never had anyone in my life, Logan,” you spat, pulling your arm away from his grip. “I’ve been alive for so long but I can’t promise myself a future. A real one. Not anything, it doesn’t matter if I live forever. Every person I loved before perished.”

Those words shook him out of the rough façade showing on his face. Your gaze told a hundred different stories when he studied your face every time. It was like mirroring himself at some point. You were the first person he ever got to know that has lived as long as he has, and maybe it was the sentimentalism, but he tried to push away those wishes of settling down. Of trying to be normal. Because he was not, and maybe, just maybe, you just didn’t accept it like he did. Probably, he was just giving up. But you weren’t, even after hundreds of years of disgrace continuously happening.

“I thought you’d get this, Logan.”

You mumbled, taking him out of his trance.

“Well, I do, in a way,” he said, but sounded more like an excuse for himself.

“Then why don’t you say it?”

“Wha-”

“Just say it,” you repeated and pointed between you and him. “What is this for you? What are we?”

Logan grabbed on your shoulders gently and leaned towards you, stealing a kiss on the sidewalk, a kiss you obliged with a bittersweet feeling for some reason, but then he whispered. “Darling, you’re everything to me now.”

Yet, you smiled and kissed him back, feeling his lips curve against your own. Well, that wasn’t so hard was it?

—

Needless to say, after the last date, your relationship with Logan had evolved to something more domestic, considering you lived together in your workplace. Affection, holding hands, quick kisses were shared now a little more freely, and you had received a couple of jokes and teases from some students and Storm. But it was fine as long as you had cleared your path with Logan, even if he didn’t act like a partner sometimes.

The certain calmness you felt one day disappeared when Logan and Ororo went to look for Scott, who often had these sad thoughts, and since Jean was his partner, it was thoroughly complicated for him to say the least. When Logan and Ororo came back to the mansion, it was not what you expected to see. Jean was alive and Scott was gone.

It hurted you, knowing first hand that their love wouldn’t be anymore. You met both of them when they were so young, becoming something like their mentor when they used to learn how to control their powers and how to fit in this world that loathed mutants to death. Now, the school was something else. It was a big, special place that was not the same without the brains of Jean, or the enthusiasm and leadership of Scott. Things were different, they had to change because the circumstances told so, and everyone had a difficult time adapting to it. One thing after another left you tired, with no option to run away, even if you wanted to. The complicated circumstances and the relationship you shared with Logan were no help either.

While on your way to check on Jean, who was still under observation after a couple of days, you stopped in your tracks when the heavy door of the med bay slid. Logan, looking all out of his daily self and mad, found you at the entrance, and you felt something different emanating from him.

For what you could see behind him, Jean was still asleep, and the Professor called Logan to come back with a serious voice, but he ignored the older man, instead approaching you.

“You knew, didn’t you?” Logan grasped your arm, his tone lower and deeper than usual.

You quickly pulled off his grip and hissed. “What are you talking about?”

“Jean.”

You felt silent. Of course she was anything he could think of since they found her.

“You knew he was controlling her,” Logan went on and your heart skipped a beat.

The look in your eyes told everything but lies. Logan scoffed and walked away, leaving you standing alone under Professor Xavier’s gaze.

“I’ll talk to him,” you mumbled at your mentor before following Logan, trying to keep his pace until he reached his room.

The whole way you tried to keep it professional, greeting students as normally you would, but when you crossed his door it was impossible to continue with the facade.

“Logan-”

“He’s insane,” he snapped, putting his jacket on and taking his bag out.

“Everything that was done was meant to protect her,” you responded calmly as he placed a handful of clothes inside the bag.

“No, you did it because you are disgusting. I bet this is what should’ve been for me if I refused to cooperate with your circus or something.”

“You don’t know what she is capable of-”

“Yeah, well I don’t wanna hear it anymore. This is so fucked up, even for you,” he continued, bag on his hand taking long strides until you were almost touching noses.

You scoffed, trying to laugh at the irony. “What does that even mean? Do you know how horrible it is to be controlled by the Phoenix inside her?.”

Logan rolled his eyes, not wanting to hear another poor excuse. You continued anyway, looking straight in his eyes before he could leave you hanging with your own words. Exactly like he used to do every damn time when you had an argument. Today, he wouldn’t run away that fast.

“She could kill you in a second and won’t hesitate. For her, we’re nothing. We’re not rivals, we can’t do shit. The only thing we could do was keep her alter ego somewhere hiding inside her mind, or else we wouldn’t be here arguing about something you never witnessed. Because I did and you don’t wanna see that, trust me,” you spat at him. He breathed rage at your words and you knew that it was getting on his nerves seeing the way his hands turned to fists. “And you think this version of her cares for you? Or that she loves you? Jean is gone now, Logan, fucking get over it.”

With last harsh words, you turned around and left the room, closing the door with a thud.

Logan breathed out. He wanted to scream, hit something, run away… Anything to let it out. He was a reckless mess but how could he react and accept Charles was playing with Jean’s mind? And you fucking knew all this time and didn’t say anything? Were his feelings dirty on him right now? Probably. Shit, he took years to finally tell you the truth about his love and affection towards you. He spent months trying to find the right words just to say ‘I love you’, and still, it seemed it wasn’t enough. The forbidden love he felt for Jean never disappeared, and he felt guilty for it.

—

You walked down to the med bay after calming down for a bit. You only needed to check on Jean for a moment and see how she was doing. Years prior, you had witnessed what the Phoenix was capable of, so you didn’t really question Charles’ methods when it came to hide this dangerous side of her inside her mind. You also thought your words might have been a little harsh on Logan, but it was the truth. He didn’t know who the Phoenix was and, if his feelings for Jean resurfaced after believing her being dead, then it wasn’t on you. As much as you loved him, as much as you tried and somehow managed to move on together, he was so easily dragged to her.

The anger you felt before took over you once again, as you found the metal doors of the lab in debris. Quickly, you made your way inside the room and found Jean wasn’t there and that Logan was lying unconscious on the floor. You knelt down by his side, calling him over and over and touching his face and shaking his shoulders until he finally opened his eyes slowly, coming back to reality.

“Logan, what happened?”

“She… she killed Scott. The Phoenix,” he whispered. You could tell he was a little weak and out of breath.

“You’re lucky she just ran away,” you pointed out, helping him to sit down. His eyes were lost in the mess in the room. Tools were destroyed, test tubes broken, crystal was everywhere, and Jean left the reminder of kissing him, yet again, before she escaped. God, he felt so idiotic.

“I’m sorry,” Logan said, looking at you. “Sorry for being a jerk. It’s my fault.”

Taking his cheeks between your hands, you gave him a reassuring look. “We’re gonna find her, okay?”

He nodded. “Yeah, we’ll find her.”

“Come here, we need to alert Charles,” you said, helping him to stand up.

Inside, you knew he wouldn’t really need your help. He was strong and indestructible like the metal on his skull, but he seemed really taken back, and you decided to stay by his side, holding his hand strongly as a way to say sorry as well. It was kind of difficult to see Logan in that state of mind, confused and lost, and you wondered what had happened back there in the lab as you left him in his bedroom, ordering him to rest for a while.

“I’ll be right back,” you assured him with loving eyes.

Logan nodded, following your figure stepping out the room and disappearing in the hallway.

He let out a breath he didn’t know was holding. His mind was having a hard time and his heart felt like breaking, going in two opposite directions, and he hated himself for that. His fate was always the same: losing people he loved and cared for dearly. So seeing Jean back again was as if god or anything up there remembered he existed and brought her back just for him. Or maybe he was just being selfish because he already had you.

You were everything for him. A couple of years might be just a short glimpse for both of you, but he was able to feel peace and calm next to you, and he was sure you did as well. Because some nights, that was all you could talk about. Logan didn’t mind hearing you for hours, it reminded him he was alive. With you, but his stupid instinct had to act.

It was his fault Jean had left. The kiss, the whole act of embracing each other’s bodies for at least two minutes, and then her breakdown, begging for him to kill her… All of that was enough to bring out the beast inside her. And he felt such a jerk now for following his desires. He already had you. Wasn’t that enough?

His thoughts were interrupted once you arrived again, finding him sitting at the end of the bed exactly as you had left him there. Sensing something different on him, you sat down by his side and rubbed his hand gently.

“We might know where she’s going,” you whispered.

“I’ll go,” Logan said before you could finish.

“I’m not sure if I should ask, but are you okay? You could do some rest,” you suggested, since seeing the redhead was clearly getting some kind of reaction from him.

“No, I need to go,” he said. But Logan could read your face perfectly, and he knew you didn’t really like the idea of him leaving the mansion. You turned your eyes, scanning the room and avoiding his gaze.

You had the need to ask what exactly had happened back there with Jean, but you didn’t want to start a fight either. Feeling Logan’s hand on your shoulder, he leaned to kiss your forehead goodbye. Maybe you were the one who should stay, check the kids, the school…

“It’ll be fine,” he mumbled, voice low and deep, as if trying to convince you, but himself as well. You nodded with your arms around his neck, giving him a hug that felt like some sort of apology you weren’t able to say out loud. “Don’t worry, it’ll be fine.”

And how you’d wish things would be fine.

—

The school has been very quiet lately. Too silent even for his taste. At nights like these, he could still feel the vigor and presence of the students running around, grabbing something to eat, planning to go out for a while... Instead, Logan found himself in a place that was mourning. Grieving the loss of Jean, Scott and Charles.

The feelings inside were complicated. He didn’t really feel the same, and the disgrace and remorse of his actions were growing on him. They were still haunting him; every day, every single night. You knew it too. It was impossible to ignore the nightmares each time he woke up from seeing Jean’s lifeless body fall against his own after he gave what she wished for the most: death.

And then, there was you. He noticed how difficult it was getting for you to sleep. You tried to hide your sorrow into your work, studying even more, keeping yourself busy with the school and not thinking about anything else. Since Charles was gone, Ororo took his place and you were her second hand. But you pushed yourself too hard.

Tonight he found your bedroom empty. He didn’t find you on his either, so he went to the place he knew you would be: your classroom. The door was half opened, the dim light of the lamp on your desk barely illuminated the papers on the surface. He found you deeply concentrated reading on something, hands on the sides of your head hiding your face.

“Hey,” he softly mumbled, stepping inside the empty classroom.

You quickly straightened yourself on the chair, wiping your cheeks and tried to look decent for a moment.

“Hey,” you replied back, low voice.

“Come to bed,” he said, coming to stand before you, his hand on your shoulder comforting and soothing you, making its way to the side of your neck. His big palm on your cheek, caressing the skin stained with your tears as if it was the most delicate thing. He took a look at the mess of papers and old books you loved too much to get rid of, scattered on the wooden surface.

“No, I- I can’t. Need to finish these by tomorrow…”

Logan gave you a nod and a grimace before taking your hand, motioning to come closer. You stood up, knowing he was trying to get you out of the work that was consuming you.

He observed every feature on your face, the sadness in your stare couldn’t be hidden. He just knew you too well, just like the palm of his hand, and he wanted to make you forget. At least for a little. You had taken care of him, helped him with your presence and your unique aura, bringing him comfort and peace to his broken mind. He wanted you to be fine. To feel loved.

Logan leaned just exactly to brush his lips with your own, teasing a kiss that he longed too much, his hands around your waist pulling you towards him.

“Can you just let me take care of you?”

Swallowing hard the knot on your throat, you curled your lips as much as the grief let you. “Yes,” you nodded.

With this, Logan leaned until your lips connected. Your arms around his neck pulled him as closer as you could get, feeling his chest against your own, his strong hands around your waist, softly touching you above your clothes.

Logan slowly walked you until your back hit the desk, hands roaming on your ass down to your legs, placing you to sit down over the loose pages. It might ruin the work a little, but none of you cared. Everything in your head was him, between your legs, running his wet mouth down your jaw, his stubble burning your skin as you gasped gently. Lying on your back on the desk, he began descending down your breasts, unbuttoning your blouse until he exposed you to the cold of the room.

He stopped right on your trousers, and gave you a quick glance. You were so eager, wet already. He could sense it. Your eyes were glowing and you were already trying to catch your breath by just his kisses and touch.

“You locked the door?” you whispered.

“Damn right I did,” he voiced, hoarse and low voice from just thinking of railing you right there and then.

“Then don’t stop.”

At your command, he unzipped your trousers, letting them fall down along with your heels on the floor. He then leaned to take your lips in a sloppy kiss, more urgent this time of feeling you close. You moaned, nails scratching his skin. His calloused hands explored your bare legs and things, creating friction with his hips with slow, controlled thrusts against your crotch. Logan left a trail of kisses down to your breasts, licking and tasting the saltiness of your body.

You urged him to go down where you ached the most, hand tangling on his hair. His hands grabbed the back of your thighs, spreading to him until his nose was almost buried on your panties, smelling and taking the sweetness of your scent, licking softly with his wet tongue over the fabric. A trail of moans and curses left your lips. He pulled your panties aside before diving in your pussy, licking your folds and teasing your hole with two of his fingers.

“Logan…”

His name repeatedly left your mouth like a plea, his fingers now inside you, stretching your walls for him. The noises grew obscene and nasty as he ate you out like a sweet craving he had been denying himself the pleasure for so long.

He was growing hard just by hearing your whimpers, and he needed you. You always were a fucking longing for him. Your words, your intelligence, your beauty… Everything he needed, you had it. And still, he didn’t have any idea of how such a rational, smart woman like you learned to love him so deeply.

You tugged on his hair, hips thrusting up to meet his growling mouth. You were so close, felt almost there where you wanted, but he pulled away before you finished.

Logan unzipped his jeans leaning back, admiring your blissed out eyes and glistened figure.

“Come here,” you begged in a whisper, tangling your legs around his waist.

He let out a low, dirty chuckle, feeling your hands on his boxers, freeing his erection.

“So fucking eager,” Logan breathed kissing your lips, hands supporting his weight at the sides of your head on the desk.

You tasted yourself within the kiss and you moaned at his words, your hand pumped him just enough to feel his pre cum leaking already, lining his dick with your cunt. Inch by inch, he entered slowly so you could get used to his size. Logan pecked your lips gently, kissing your cheeks and the side of your neck to get into your sensitive skin. You tugged on his white shirt so he could remove it and he ripped your bra apart right after. He loved to feel your chest pressed against his own. You gasped but paid no mind, instead urging him to move inside you.

“Shit, Logan please-”

A particular harsh trust caught your breath on your throat. You held onto dear life with your hands on his shoulders. He pounded into you rock hard and deep. So damn deep the desk was shrieking under, papers fell off and the lamp moved at the same rhythm but you hoped it won’t break.

Logan growled, inhaling your scent and tasting the sweat forming on your collarbone, your breasts bouncing against his chest. He felt your nails trailing down his back, and oh, how he wished he could get damn scars on just by fucking you like this. But the view of you, squirming under him, eyes closed, being a whimpering mess… All because of him. He was so insanely in love with your fucked out expression every time.

Your walls clenched, close to the sweet end. Logan felt himself twitching inside your warm pussy and his thrusts were getting erratic and sloppy. He filled you up, reaching his own climax first, hot white ropes of cum painting your insides. Your pussy milked him all the way as he kept spliting you open until you let yourself go, legs trembling around his waist.

For a moment, you stayed like this, with him kissing your shoulder and caressing your thigh, taking in the aftermath of your intense lovemaking.

“Thank you…”

Your whisper forced him to look up at you. There it was, that loving, sweet gaze you had reserved just for him.

He nodded, palm on your jaw holding you gently. “Of course…”

For some reason, he wanted to voice out for once those stupid three words.

I love you.

Or at least hoped you would do it first.

—

The night was cold under the moonlight, almost freezing. He wondered how he got trapped there, between the messy, withered shrubbery, fog, and the trees of a forest he never recalled knowing. He was alert, senses to the limit in case something might attack him. He felt as if he was being watched, but there were no eyes he could find around. He couldn’t see much like that.

But then a voice started to call his name from afar, claws coming out immediately as he sharpened his senses to find the owner. One, two, three times he heard, trying to find the person who was calling but there was only darkness. His heart skipped a beat when someone spoke behind him.

“Logan…”

He turned on his feet and he felt like dying again. “Jean?”

He withdrew his claws back immediately. The redhead smiled, coming closer until she touched his cheek with a soft hand before pulling away. “How are you, Logan?”

“What-”

“Are you happy now?” she asked, beaming brightly as if they were in a casual conversation instead of the darkness of the woods.

His brows furrowed. She couldn’t be real. She wasn’t there with him. Jean was gone, he had killed her because it was what she wanted. It was her way out to get what she needed; it was the key to her freedom…

“What do you mean?”

“With her… Be careful. You could kill her. Just like me,” Jean whispered, tears forming in her eyes.

Logan stepped back, trying to get away. He shook his head in disbelief, not knowing exactly why Jean was saying this to him.

“No… You’re not real…”

“Everything you love is destined to death and chaos, Logan. You shouldn’t be there,” Jean continued, her eyes switching from her usual tone to a deep black. The ground began trembling under their feet with each step of her, wind building up around. Logan felt truly scared, but somehow he couldn’t run, just stand there as she approached. “All she will know is a life of suffering if you stay. She doesn’t need that.”

“Jean-”

“She doesn’t need you!”

“Jean!”

And then it happened so fast. His claws buried on her chest, the Phoenix disappearing and leaving her to die. Jean collapsed against his body and Logan reminisced about the events of that battle, where he had to choose to be selfish or liberate her from her own demons. Logan wasn’t sure why he stabbed her like this. And when he thought Jean was dead in his arms, she started to call his name again. This time, he heard it far away.

Logan.

Logan…

Logan!

His eyes went wide open. And there you were, by his side on the bed, calling for him with a pain grimace on your face. His claws buried on your stomach.

“Logan…” you gasped and he pulled the claws out, but you were already bleeding, your nightshirt and the mattress stained.

“Shit, I’m so sorry, I’m sorry- I-”

“It’s okay,” you managed to say as he caressed your cheek before taking you in his arms hurriedly and quickly made the way out of your room through the halls. “The nightmares… I know, Logan…”

“God, I’m so sorry, please forgive me. Hank!” Logan stood outside the scientist’s door. “Hank, I need your help!”

The commotion caused some of the students to peek from their doors, and Logan waited outside what he felt it was forever under the gazes of the teenagers. It wasn’t the first time he had caused the same accident. The door opened, finally revealing a sleepy Hank putting his glasses on.

There was no need to explain what had happened.

—

“She’ll be stable soon,” Hank informed once he let Logan inside the med bay. “If you hadn’t brought her soon…”

Logan swallowed the knot on his throat, watching your unconscious figure on the stretcher. You already had received blood to cover up what you lost because of the wounds, and Logan’s claws were not minor weapons. His mind was a mess, confusion taking over. He didn’t know how he let this happen. He had nightmares pretty often, yes, but nothing like this.

Maybe Jean was right. Maybe she was trying to warn him about something. Or Jean was just trying to protect you from him. The last one felt more realistic. Logan wouldn’t hurt you, not ever. You talked about how dangerous it was to sleep together not so long ago, but you had insisted on staying. It was the first time something felt so damn real in his dreams and he wished you wouldn’t let him in your room that night…

“She’ll wake up, right?” Logan asked.

“Absolutely,” Hank nodded. “I will need to monitor her vital signs though, hopefully within a day or two she will be normal again… At least she’ll be stable until the wounds heal completely.”

Of course, Logan thought. You didn’t have a healing factor just like him.

“I’ll be right back,” Hank announced before stepping out of the room, leaving Logan alone.

He felt so guilty for doing this to you. For everything. For being the cause of your suffering now. He was a threat and mentally unstable. He was strong thanks to his genes, but he was weak on the inside. He promised countless times to protect you, but he couldn’t avoid hurting you himself. It didn’t matter that it was a very bad dream that felt disgustingly real, he had failed and hurted someone who truly loved. Again.

Taking your hand gently into his, he leaned to plant a kiss on your forehead, wishing it would be just another game from his mind.

But it wasn’t. Now, he had the person he loved the most lying unconscious and hurted because he would let his darkest thoughts consume him.

“I’m sorry,” he mumbled, watching you sleep peacefully. “I should have said it sooner.”

PART TWO

#logan howlett x reader #wolverine x reader #logan howlett x you #wolverine x you #logan howlett x female reader #wolverine smut #logan howlett smut #logan howlett angst #logan howlett fanfiction #wolverine angst #james logan howlett #x men fanfiction #wolverine fanfiction #hugh jackman fanfiction #hugh jackman wolverine

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crispy-armpit · 1 year ago

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✧ 𝒊 𝒕𝒂𝒌𝒆 𝒎𝒚 𝒘𝒉𝒊𝒔𝒌𝒆𝒚 𝒏𝒆𝒂𝒕 ✧

yandere secret agent x reader

‧₊˚ ⋅ ‧ 🍸₊˚ ⋆｡ 𖦹 °

⭒ 𝘴𝘶𝘮𝘮𝘢𝘳𝘺: after taking on your friend's offer to head downtown to a hidden bar, you find yourself in the middle of a covert operation. thankfully Messiah is there to hide you from danger. or did he just push you right into it?

⭒ 𝘤𝘰𝘯𝘵𝘦𝘯𝘵: gn reader, yandere, suggestive position & situation, slight violence, reader held at gunpoint, mentions of a firearm and getting shot, reader pressed against male crotch, sadism(?), auditory hallucination (you hear voices), hair pulling, swearing

⭒ 𝘸𝘰𝘳𝘥 𝘤𝘰𝘶𝘯𝘵: 1,153 words

⭒ a/n: it was my birthday last month and i had planned to post this by then but ofc i never learn my lesson and kept my drafts in tumblr (leading to it getting deleted) 😭!! so sorry for the wait everyone and happy late new years! :D hope u like the batman wannabe.. it goes from 0 to 100 rq because it's hilarious to me and i'm sleep deprived.. i can smell the hate comments already

will you venture down this path?

it was supposed to be another weekend night spent alone in your home; you, comfortably snuggling against your pillows while playing your favourite brain-rot game from night to morning.

but here you were— unfortunately not in your bed, and devastatingly not romancing your fictional game characters. your friend, Vern, had dragged convinced you to join him and try out some random jazz bar which recently opened.

he mentioned his band would be playing there... he's probably just trying to get more people to hype up his band.

the warm ambience of the bistro & bar, alongside the joyous laughter ringing all over the room, people bantering and simply enjoying each other's presence was enough to erase the thoughts of your usual weekend plans. it was the type of place where you couldn't bring up any negative emotions just because of how chill everyone and everything was. so that's one forgiveness point to your friend.

at some point, Vern had split off from you to meet up with the other Ares band members to go perform— leaving you to drink away your life at the bar.

you channeled your best resting bitch face to avoid any strangers trying to hit on you, which worked. you sat alone listening to the blue voice of the current performer, making small talk here and there with the bartender.

oh, the bartender—

you'd been eyeing him up all night.

he was the only other person at the bar. like all other bartenders, he was charismatic and attractive despite the two deep scars running down his left cheek.

maybe he noticed you looking at it, because he suddenly rasped out, "...animal attack" with a nonchalant smile. which is quite impressive, since your gaze never once lingered on the scars for too long. he must be observing me.

Logan (you read his name tag) was an exceptional conversationist. and he played the bartender role extremely well. he brought up topics like your ambitions, your dreams, and even your darkest passions effortlessly.

but his eyes never seemed to really focus on your figure when you talked.

it was always off to a specific direction in the distance. and when you turned to look at what he was looking at, there would only be the same wrinkly old man sitting on the sofa chair.

"can you see it?"

confused, you reply, "see what?"

do you see it? the eyes? his lack of mouth? with hair as white as his, and skin as dark as void, how can you not see me?

"what the hell are you sayi—" you grow pale when you turn back and see Logan had his back turned away from you the whole time, far from the counter.

who was talking to me?

and for the first time in 3 hours since you've arrived, the old man from the chair moves. he wanders aimlessly for a moment until setting his sights on the bar. multiple random people who were loitering in the room take notice of his sudden movement, and all briskly walk towards him.

you're petrified.

the world is spinning, people are blocking the old man's path from you. and you're so thankful for that because it gives you the time to be pulled on top of the bar counter and then underneath it by a pair of strong hands.

your consciousness recovers and you're met with Logan, body crouched down to your level. his shadowed face shows no semblance of the bright man you were talking to a while ago. now his own icy blue eyes pierced through yours, and the once attractive rasp of his voice is now chilling to the bone.

"Logan—"

"you better fucking shut up unless you want to die."

he pulls out a revolver and points it to your forehead.

profusely nodding your head in understanding, tears begin to prick your eyes; this is so fucking messed up, what is happening??

your brain tells you that this was just the alcohol getting to you, and maybe Logan has some kind of split personality and a murderer... that it's some kind of sick prank Vern is probably pulling on you. maybe my drink got spiked...

but your gut tells you that you are in great danger. alcohol has never made you experience that level of auditory hallucination... hell, you were probably being delusional right now— of course Logan's trying to kill you!!

you could hear the faint sounds of bodies thudding against other people as if they were thrown or pushed. but no screams, just grunts. the loudness of the approaching footsteps came to a halt in front of the counter.

you cover your cries as best as you can with your palms and with Logan's hidden weapon still pointed at you. you could so easily whack it away or dodge it. but you stop once you hear the most grotesque voice ever, the result of what sounded like flesh tearing apart and bones reconstructing.

"where... are... they.....?"

you are faced with two decisions:

scream for help and get shot in the head by Logan

scream for help and face whatever the fuck is out there

either way, you don't get to choose. because the stress of the situation is beginning to overwhelm you and soon your whimpers slip out a little. small enough to not be heard from in front of the counter, but big enough for whoever is on top of you— and that someone happened to be the psychopathic bartender.

you freeze.

but your strength alone is not enough to hold back against the veiny hands that grab the back of your hair and push you against the bulge of the man standing in front of you.

you push and thrash over his grasp, but your actions only lead to him digging the lower parts of your face further into his crotch. WHAT THE FUCK IS HE DOING??? IS HE TRYING TO SILENCE ME WITH HIS DICK?!

and it works...

you stay silent and limp, not because of fear. but because of the absurdity of this situation and the slow growth of whatever beast is hiding under those black waiter pants.

the heat of your muffled breath against his privates collects in your face, it's getting too much but you hold yourself together. your hands that were once pushing him off now lay on the top of his hardened thighs.

Logan shares a couple words with the old man before pointing him elsewhere. you catch a strange name falling off the old man's lips, Messiah. fuck, is this a cult? shortly afterwards, you hear the light sounds of evacuating feet. he's finally gone.

and with the speed of a middle-aged lady during black friday sales, you manage to push him off to the side and stand up across him, ready to give him a piece of your mind.

you were humiliated, violated, mentally tired and— and—

why the fuck is he blushing.

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deathsmaidens · 3 months ago

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anyway, now that my certified esther shitpost™ is out of the way : i just wanna remind everyone of the heavy emphasis on my sporadic activity. i do my best to be on here whenever i have the energy & motivation to do so. ever since i started my new job, i think my bursts of activity & periods of downtime have become a lot more noticeable. if you don't see me yapping all day every day on the dash, you can also assume that i'm generally not logged into my rp blog.

all that is to say ⸺ i am not ignoring anyone, i'm just perpetually tired :< i'm thinking of milou 24/7 still though, so no one needs to worry about that 🥰💜 please give me some time to check out any new blogs that have followed me ( if we aren't mutuals yet ! ) & i'll similarly be slow to answer any tumblr dms. i'm always available on discord if anyone needs smth from me or just wants to chat though !! 💜

#( 𝒊. ) ⠀ ⸺ ⠀ out of character ⠀。#being away from the dash has done wonders to my mental health #(i still hate it here though)#things are rough rn but we are coping somehow!#ive mostly just been focusing on my original writing .... so yeah ....#anyway kisses to u all ilysm #<3<3<3

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crownslip · 3 months ago

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going to attempt to get some writing done and queue what i can. it's harder than i thought to not put pressure on myself to get xyz amount done or be x% active.

#𝒊. out of character.

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hiisheart · 1 year ago

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( yes that's correct mike's neck is extremely ticklish and if you get him there's nothing he can do to stop you sdfjkdhsf )

#( sorry i just went to hop in the shower between answering asks )#( and this has been on my mind pervasively since answering that last one skjdhfsd )#⠀ ⠀ ♥︎ ⠀ ⠀ 𝒊𝒇 𝒂𝒏𝒚𝒐𝒏𝒆 𝒂𝒔𝒌𝒔 𝒘𝒉𝒆𝒓𝒆 𝒊 𝒂𝒎 𝒊'𝒗𝒆 𝒍𝒆𝒇𝒕 𝒕𝒉𝒆 𝒄𝒐𝒖𝒏𝒕𝒓𝒚 ⠀ ⠀ ╱ ⠀ ⠀ headcanons.#⠀ ⠀ ♥︎ ⠀ ⠀ 𝒏𝒐𝒂𝒉 𝒓𝒂𝒎𝒃𝒍𝒆𝒔 ⠀ ⠀ ╱ ⠀ ⠀ out of character.

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imyourbratzdoll · 11 months ago

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𝒊 𝒈𝒖𝒆𝒔𝒔 𝒐𝒖𝒓 𝒔𝒕𝒐𝒓𝒚 𝒆𝒏𝒅𝒔 𝒉𝒆𝒓𝒆…

part 4 of 🌧️welcome to hell🌧️

summary - you finally made your decision.

warning - angst, swearing, mentions of cheating, attempt at gaslighting, betrayal, disappointment.

the gif I use isn't mine, headers by me.

part 1 - part 2 - part 3 - part 5

Warnings and Reminders - Please do not plagiarise, copy, repost/republish, adapt, or translate any of my work on any social media platforms, apps, or third-party sites. The only platforms I post my work on are: Tumblr and Wattpad. I do not own any character of any franchise (Marvel etc.) All my works are fiction and may be dark or triggering content: READ ALL WARNINGS BEFORE PROCEEDING.

You had woken up the next day, and you just laid there. You couldn’t move, your entire being ached, you were exhausted both physically, emotionally, and mentally. You had never felt this exhausted in your whole life, you never felt this broken and stuck.

You knew you had to choose. The weight on your shoulders was bringing you down and you didn’t know if you could go on any longer without making a choice, a decision that could change your life forever.

You could either pretend and live on in an obvious one–sided marriage while your husband continues to sleep around with your EX–best friend and any other woman he has on the side OR you could confront him and leave, making him sign the divorce papers that you would have to get a lawyer for the moment you left. But it would mean you would have to start all over again.

You flip onto your back and stare up at the ceiling, the memories from last night flash through your mind again, your husband and ex–best friend fucking each other in the bathroom, them fucking while you “slept”. You don’t think you could do this again nor could you pretend that everything was okay. You could hear them from the lounge room, their voices the only thing filling the quiet home. They sounded happy as they bantered and teased each other.

You slowly slide to the edge of the bed and sit up. Your eyes connect in the mirror, and you finally look at yourself. You didn’t recognise the woman staring back at you, she seemed so lifeless, so broken. Where had the old you gone? Was she still there? You could see the sadness and rage swirling beneath your eyes, followed by bags and dried tears underneath.

You were so sick of crying. When did you become so weak over a man?

Everything seemed to click when those beautiful blue eyes appeared in your mind. You could finally feel yourself think more clearly, you finally knew your decision. You weren’t making your decision because of those eyes, but they seemed to help clarify what you wanted. You could feel your soul tugging as the unknown man appeared in your thoughts.

With one last look at yourself and a deep breath later, you turned. Ready.

And finally, you chose yourself.

“You got this.” You say and you will forever say it even with tears in your eyes. You move swiftly around the room, grabbing a suitcase from your cupboard and laying it down on the bed. You begin to pack, folding your clothes neatly before you place them in. You move onto shoes, accessories, makeup, perfume, and anything else that was yours. Once you zipped up your suitcase, you looked around the room. Your eyes caught in the mirror, and you finally felt freer.

You grabbed your suitcase and spare outfit and left the bedroom. Resting the suitcase against the front door, you head into the spare bathroom as your other had been tainted with your husband’s infidelity and your ex–best friend’s betrayal.

You had taken your time in the shower, washing the pain and sadness from your body. You even took your time making yourself look good, wanting him to regret his choices the moment you left him. With a final look in the mirror, you head out of the bathroom and into the lounge room. Your soon–to–be ex–husband and ex–best friend sitting too close for comfort, the sadness and anger that had been bubbling over had slowly disappeared as a blanket of numbness covered you. You could finally focus without your emotions getting in the way.

“Somehow, I expected that this would happen eventually.” Your voice fills the room and the two on the couch jump apart, eyes wide as their heads whip towards you. You stare blankly, your heart still hurts but it was good. It was reminding you of what they had done. It was true, the old you had expected this would happen, but you were so caught up in thinking he loved you that you were blinded by him and his lies. “Given your history, I should have known better.”

Johnny chuckles nervously, looking between you and Sarah. He wasn’t expecting this, but maybe he could lie and get out of it. Make you think it’s all in your head. “Babe, what are you talking about? I haven’t done anything!” He had to be careful, you hadn’t said what it was and if he wanted to lie, he couldn’t give anything away by saying the wrong thing.

“So, you didn’t cheat on me?” You decided to play dumb. You remembered who you were, and the game changed. You wouldn’t let anyone make you forget again.

Johnny scoffs. “Of course not, Babe! I love you! We’re just friends.” It was at that moment that he knew he fucked up.

“Just friends, huh?” You laugh. “Well, just friends don’t practically sit on top of each other especially when one is married, just friends don’t flirt with one another in a not so platonic way. Just friends don’t fuck each other in the bathroom while one friends wife is showering, just friends don’t slip out of bed when they think their wife is sleeping to fuck their friend in the other room. I’ve never had any friends like that, Johnny.” Your glare sharpens as you spit his name out with venom.

His mouth opens and closes, and Sarah’s eyes widen. “How did you find out?”

“You fucked her in OUR house! How do you think I found out?!” Your anger began to push against the numbness, wanting to be unleashed “I also remember everything. Every time you’d leave, look at another woman only for you and her to disappear a few minutes later, how you’d always be on your phone, OUR wedding.” You watched as they paled at the last part.

“Babe! It was never supposed to get this far! Trust me, I’m so sorry!” He gets up and moves closer to you. Hurt flashes through his eyes when you back away from him, the thought of him touching you again disgusted you.

“Get away from me! You’re not sorry, you’re just sorry you got caught! So don’t lie to me! I can’t believe I trusted you.” You could feel it, the blanket of numbness was slowly slipping away, and the tears returned, but they didn’t fall like before.

“Did you ever really love me...?” Your gaze shifted, your ex–best friend didn’t even look guilty, it was like a weight lifted off her shoulders. What did you ever do to her? “Do you love her?”

“Yes, I love you! I don’t love her, please believe me. It was just sex! She means nothing to me.” You could see the lie in his eyes, you wondered when he fell in love with her. You wondered if any of it was real. You wondered if his soul tugged the same way yours did when you bumped into that man, but if it did. Why didn’t he just leave? Why did they have to hurt you so bad? Why did they have to break you?

You shake your head. “I don’t believe you.” You swallow down the lump in your throat. “You made a promise. The same day you made that promise you had your dick in someone else. Tell me, was any part of this at least real?” You stared into his eyes, watching him think. You sighed, “Do you have any regrets doing this to me?” A part of you needed to know.

Instead of answering your question, he responded with. “Do we really have to end it all?” Your eyes ached from the weight of unshed tears. He was your home, did he not understand? But, you weren’t his and it was time for you to go.

With a heavy sigh, you ignore his question like he did yours and pull off your wedding and engagement ring. “I loved you in this lifetime… I won’t make that mistake in the next.” With shaky hands you push the rings into his chest, letting go of them as his hand comes up. Hoping to catch yours, but instead he only catches the rings. “Goodbye, Johnny. I guess our story ends here…” You walk out of the room and towards the door, grabbing your things. This was it…

Maybe she was his happy ending. Hopefully you could find yours.

thank you for reading!

feedback and reblogs are greatly appreciated.

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heircurse-1 · 1 year ago

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› ﹙ KAREN ﹚ he was just so charming, and kept saying how i had killer legs, and how he wanted to photograph them, and things just got completely out of hand. | | | | | | @madeblonde

❛❛ alright alright— ❜❜ he'll cut her off with a wave of his hands before there was a long enough pause that may have made room for the possibility of divulging further details [ ... ] not out of dismissiveness , nor was it even for his own sake. quite the opposite , actually. he was only trying to digest it all before there came time for more , and while he certainly didn't enjoy the information he was being fed —— and the way his features twisted into something that was both perplexed and appalled while she confided in him would speak volumes ; these emotions were far from targeted towards her.

if anything , the guy in question should consider himself lucky to not currently be in the same room —— in range of harry's eyesight and hands. god knows it wouldn't work out in the scumbag's favor. tongue darted out to drag across his lower lip in a moment of thought before he gave a small shake of his head. ❛❛ so.. so , what , he took pictures of you in your underwear or somethin'? ❜❜ he'll hope that had been the extent , as bad enough as that already was [ ... ] but he'll worry the photographs had gone even further without actually saying it. ❛❛ jesus , kare— you got any idea how quick that shit can spread around? ❜❜

#madeblonde #𝒊. [ 𝓗. 𝙾𝚂𝙱𝙾𝚁𝙽 ] . . . . ᵖʳᵒˢᵉ ˒ ◟ in character.#verse tba / 004.#. u gotta tell him who karen <3 ( he'll find out regardless )

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punksdoll · 1 year ago

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hi!! can i request a cm punk x reader?? do it of whatever u want (fluff pls)

~~~𝑺𝒖𝒓𝒑𝒓𝒊𝒔𝒆 𝒅𝒐𝒍𝒍~~~

gif not mine like, comments, & reblogs appreciated

𝑪𝒎 𝑷𝒖𝒏𝒌 𝒙 𝒇𝒆𝒎!𝒓𝒆𝒂𝒅𝒆𝒓 ^owner of gif

𝒔𝒖𝒎𝒎𝒂𝒓𝒚: 𝒔𝒖𝒓𝒑𝒓𝒊𝒔𝒆 𝒔𝒖𝒓𝒑𝒓𝒊𝒔𝒆

𝒂/𝒏: 𝒕𝒉𝒊𝒔 𝒐𝒏𝒆’𝒔 𝒕𝒉𝒆 𝒐𝒏𝒆. 𝒚𝒆𝒔 𝒊𝒕 𝒊𝒔. 𝒕𝒉𝒊𝒔 𝒊𝒔 𝒎𝒚 𝒏𝒆𝒘𝒇𝒐𝒖𝒏𝒅 𝒇𝒂𝒗𝒐𝒓𝒊𝒕𝒆. 𝒕𝒉𝒂𝒏𝒌 𝒚𝒐𝒖 𝒇𝒐𝒓 𝒓𝒆𝒒𝒖𝒆𝒔𝒕𝒊𝒏𝒈 𝒂𝒏𝒅 𝒊 𝒉𝒐𝒑𝒆 𝒚𝒐𝒖 𝒆𝒏𝒋𝒐𝒚<𝟑.

𝒘𝒂𝒓𝒏𝒊𝒏𝒈𝒔: 𝒔𝒐𝒇𝒕 𝑷𝒉𝒊𝒍𝒍𝒚 𝑷𝒉𝒊𝒍𝒍, 𝒉𝒆 𝒍𝒊𝒕𝒆𝒓𝒂𝒍𝒍𝒚 𝒍𝒐𝒗𝒆𝒔 𝒉𝒆𝒓, 𝒓𝒆𝒂𝒍𝒍𝒚 𝒍𝒐𝒗𝒆𝒔 𝒉𝒆𝒓, 𝒉𝒆 𝒌𝒏𝒐𝒘𝒔, 𝒉𝒆 𝒍𝒊𝒔𝒕𝒆𝒏𝒔, 𝒉𝒆’𝒔 𝒆𝒗𝒆𝒓𝒚𝒕𝒉𝒊𝒏𝒈 𝒊’𝒅 𝒘𝒂𝒏𝒕 𝒊𝒏 𝒂 𝒎𝒂𝒏, 𝒇𝒍𝒖𝒇𝒇𝒇𝒇𝒇

not proofread

Y/n lets out a deep sigh as she pulls up into her and her boyfriend’s driveway. All she wanted to do was curl up in her boyfriend’s arm and force him to read a book to her to lull her to sleep. She found his voice rather calming to her and the easiest way to fall asleep. She also adored his side commentary whenever a character would do something stupid in the book.

Y/n gets out the car and makes her way towards the door, unlocking the door and walking in. “I’m home.” Y/n broodingly says with no enthusiasm whatsoever. Y/n throws her stuff into a corner and starts walking away to try and find her boyfriend.

“You sound excited.” Cm Punk says sarcastically as he pops up from nowhere. Y/n turns towards him and rushes over to wrap her arms around him and shoves her face in his neck with a sigh.

“Now I am…” Y/n closes her eyes and Phil can feel her lashes flutter down on his neck as he wraps his tattoo covered arms around her.

“You ok?” Phil rubs her back with his thumb as he lays his head down on her head.

“Just tired…can you read to me after i take a shower?” Y/n moves her head away to position her chin on his chest to look up at him.

Phil chuckles and shakes his head, “No.” He says making y/n face drop immediately. “I have a surprise for you instead.” He smiles, moving his hands to brush away her hair from her face.

“Oh?” Y/n smiles, “What is it?”

“Go take a bath and you’ll see. The bath is already set and warm just for you.” Phil gives her a quick kiss before y/n could break away and rush to the bathroom where the bathtub is indeed filled up with hot water.

•••

Y/n walks inside her shared room and sees Phil lying down and waiting for her.

“I’m doneee.” Y/n smiles as she grabs one of Phil’s hoodies and puts it on herself.

Phil smiles and throw his phone on the side and gets up, “C’mon.” He grabs her hand and leads her out the bedroom and towards his office. It wasn’t actually his office, it was more like a storage room for all of his old wrestling stuff such as titles, old merch, etc.

“Are you gonna show me some new title or something?” Y/n questions with a frown.

“Nah…that’s nowhere near what i’m gonna show you.” Phil stops in front of the door, “I actually have been fixing this room up to surprise you.” Phil opens up the door and lets y/n go in first and when she does, she feels herself get emotional almost automatically.

Instead of seeing a bunch of wwe championship titles and old merch, you see books. You see bookshelf’s merged together with books all in them. Some being y/n’s and some even being new ones that she had put on her wish list on amazon. Around the bookshelf’s there were fairy lights and in between two bookshelf’s was a big fluffy bean bag that already seems like it’s been broken in. Next to it is a y/f/c record player that settles on a night stand with an open shelf that holds different vinyls. Y/n finds herself walking over to it and grabs a vinyl and sees it titled with her boyfriend’s messy handwriting.

A Sky Painted Gold, read by me. your boyfriend weirdo.

Y/n giggles and puts it back then looks over at Phil who is leaning against the doorway with a proud smirk. “Like it?”

Y/n lets out a high pitched squeal as she jumps up and down, clapping her hands and falling back on the bean bag, immediately sinking into it. “OH I LOVE IT!” She shouts, standing up and running towards Phil, throwing her arms around him. “Thank you! Thank you! Thank you!” She thanks him multiple times, giving him multiple kisses.

Phil smiles and gives him a big kiss, “Now whenever i’m away and gone and you miss my voice? Just play one of those vinyls and it’ll feel like the real thing. If you wanna take it with you?�� Phil pulls her phone out and goes on spotify where he made a private playlist for her that’s filled with him reading multiple books, “Just go right here, doll.”

Y/n feels her eyes burning as she looks between her phone and back at him, “You’re so good to me…”

Phil smiles and gives her a big kiss, “Marry me.”

Y/n eyes widened, “What…?”

Phil smiles and pulls out a box, opening it up to reveal a pretty black ring. “Will you marry me?” He repeats himself, “I’ll do a lot of things but getting down on my knees can’t be an option. I’m too old for that.”

Y/n stares at the ring then back at Phil then at the room that he turned into her own library, “YES!” Y/n shouts as she throws herself at him, wrapping her limps around him.

Phil laughs and holds her close to him, fumbling around before grabbing her hand and putting the ring on her. “Hello to you Mrs.Brooks.”

#wwe imagine #wwe raw #wwe smackdown #wwe x reader #wwe one shot #wwe superstars #cm punk x reader #cm punk #wwe cm punk #cm punk imagine #best in the world #clobbering time #cmpunk

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sturnioluv · 4 months ago

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𝒂𝒎 𝒊 𝒎𝒂𝒌𝒊𝒏𝒈 𝒚𝒐𝒖 𝒇𝒆𝒆𝒍 𝒔𝒊𝒄𝒌?

𝘪𝘯 𝘸𝘩𝘪𝘤𝘩 𝘤𝘩𝘳𝘪𝘴 𝘨𝘰𝘦𝘴 𝘵𝘰 𝘢 𝘱𝘢𝘳𝘵𝘺, 𝘨𝘦𝘵𝘴 𝘥𝘳𝘶𝘯𝘬 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘮𝘢𝘬𝘦𝘴 𝘰𝘶𝘵 𝘸𝘪𝘵𝘩 𝘢 𝘨𝘪𝘳𝘭 𝘵𝘩𝘢𝘵´𝘴 𝘯𝘰𝘵 𝘩𝘪𝘴 𝘨𝘪𝘳𝘭𝘧𝘳𝘪𝘦𝘯𝘥. 𝘩𝘦 𝘤𝘰𝘮𝘦𝘴 𝘩𝘰𝘮𝘦 𝘸𝘩𝘪𝘭𝘦 𝘺𝘰𝘶’𝘳𝘦 𝘢𝘴𝘭𝘦𝘦𝘱 𝘣𝘶𝘵 𝘩𝘦 𝘤𝘢𝘯´𝘵 𝘩𝘪𝘥𝘦 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘩𝘪𝘤𝘬𝘪𝘦𝘴 𝘰𝘯 𝘩𝘪𝘴 𝘯𝘦𝘤𝘬...

𝘼.𝙉. 𝙁𝙄𝙍𝙎𝙏 𝙁𝙄𝘾!!!! 𝙡𝙚𝙩 𝙢𝙚 𝙠𝙣𝙤𝙬 𝙬𝙝𝙖𝙩 𝙮𝙤𝙪 𝙩𝙝𝙞𝙣𝙠 𝙖𝙣𝙙 𝙝𝙤𝙬 𝙞 𝙘𝙖𝙣 𝙞𝙢𝙥𝙧𝙤𝙫𝙚 𝙘𝙖𝙪𝙨𝙚 𝙞 𝙝𝙖𝙫𝙚𝙣´𝙩 𝙬𝙧𝙞𝙩𝙩𝙚𝙣 𝙞𝙣 𝙡𝙞𝙠𝙚 𝙖 𝙮𝙚𝙖𝙧 𝙖𝙣𝙙 𝙖 𝙝𝙖𝙡𝙛. 𝙖𝙡𝙨𝙤 𝙜𝙞𝙫𝙚 𝙢𝙚 𝙩𝙝𝙚𝙢𝙚 𝙞𝙙𝙚𝙖𝙨 𝙛𝙤𝙧 𝙢𝙮 𝙗𝙡𝙤𝙜! 𝙞𝙠 𝙩𝙝𝙚 𝙩𝙧𝙞𝙥𝙡𝙚𝙩𝙨 𝙬𝙤𝙪𝙡𝙙𝙣´𝙩 𝙙𝙧𝙞𝙣𝙠 𝙖𝙨 𝙗𝙖𝙙 𝙖𝙨 𝙘𝙝𝙧𝙞𝙨 𝙙𝙤𝙚𝙨 𝙞𝙣 𝙩𝙝𝙚 𝙨𝙩𝙤𝙧𝙮 𝙞𝙩´𝙨 𝙟𝙪𝙨𝙩 𝙛𝙤𝙧 𝙩𝙝𝙞𝙨 𝙛𝙞𝙘. 𝙩𝙝𝙞𝙨 𝙞𝙨 𝙢𝙖𝙞𝙣𝙡𝙮 𝙖𝙣𝙜𝙨𝙩 𝙖𝙣𝙙 𝙛𝙡𝙪𝙛𝙛. 𝙗𝙖𝙨𝙚𝙙 𝙤𝙣 𝙩𝙝𝙚 𝙨𝙤𝙣𝙜 𝙨𝙩𝙧𝙖𝙣𝙜𝙚𝙧𝙨 𝙗𝙮 𝙚𝙩𝙝𝙚𝙡 𝙘𝙖𝙞𝙣. 𝙖𝙡𝙨𝙤 𝙞 𝙝𝙖𝙙 𝙩𝙤 𝙥𝙪𝙩 𝙘𝙝𝙧𝙞𝙨 𝙙𝙧𝙞𝙫𝙞𝙣𝙜 𝙞𝙣 𝙝𝙚𝙧𝙚 𝙞𝙣 𝙝𝙤𝙣𝙤𝙧 𝙤𝙛 𝙝𝙞𝙢 𝙜𝙚𝙩𝙩𝙞𝙣𝙜 𝙝𝙞𝙨 𝙡𝙞𝙘𝙚𝙣𝙨𝙚. 𝙥𝙡𝙚𝙖𝙨𝙚 𝙖𝙡𝙨𝙤 𝙜𝙞𝙫𝙚 𝙢𝙚 𝙩𝙞𝙥𝙨 𝙤𝙣 𝙝𝙤𝙬 𝙞 𝙘𝙖𝙣 𝙞𝙢𝙥𝙧𝙤𝙫𝙚 𝙖𝙨 𝙞'𝙙 𝙡𝙤𝙫𝙚 𝙩𝙤 𝙨𝙩𝙖𝙧𝙩 𝙥𝙤𝙨𝙩𝙞𝙣𝙜 𝙢𝙤𝙧𝙚 𝙛𝙞𝙘𝙨 𝙤𝙣 𝙝𝙚𝙧𝙚!

𝗐𝖺𝗋𝗇𝗂𝗇𝗀𝗌: 𝖺𝗇𝗀𝗌𝗍!𝗋𝖾𝗌𝗈𝗅𝗏𝖾𝖽, 𝖽𝖺𝗇𝗀𝖾𝗋𝗈𝗎𝗌 𝖽𝗋𝗂𝗏𝗂𝗇𝗀! (𝗉𝗅𝖾𝖺𝗌𝖾 𝖽𝗈𝗇´𝗍 𝖽𝗋𝗂𝗏𝖾 𝗂𝗇𝗌𝖺𝗇𝖾𝗅𝗒 𝖿𝖺𝗌𝗍, 𝗌𝗍𝖺𝗒 𝗌𝖺𝖿𝖾), 𝖼𝗎𝗋𝗌𝗂𝗇𝗀! crying! chris being drunk!

you were sitting on the couch in the living room with matt, since nick and chris were at a Halloween party tonight. you usually didn’t feel the need to worry about chris going to parties as he wasn’t a big drinker and you highly doubted that he’d ever cheat. you were relaxed and happy that your boyfriend was out of the house. you decided to stay home, seeing as you were never a big fan of parties. matt wasn’t a fan either which is why you two were sitting on the couch laughing while watching national treasure.

“riley’s for sure my favorite character” you said, pointing at the tv screen to the character you were talking about. “no way! abigail’s the best.” matt said as he threw popcorn into his mouth. you rolled your eyes slightly and took some popcorn yourself before looking back at the tv. you sat there and watched about two and a half movies with matt before your eyes started getting heavy. “hey matt i’m gonna head to bed if that’s alright with you. i can barely stay awake.” you rubbed your eyes and stood up off the couch as matt looked at you speaking, “yeah, that’s totally fine y/n, go get some sleep. i’ll make sure the boys get home safe. goodnight.” you smiled and walked to chris’s room to get ready for bed.

once you were in your pjs and ready to sleep, you got a text. it was chris, telling you he’d be home in a little while. some of the letters were jumbled up a bit but you’d figured that was just chris since he’d always been bad at texting. you quickly smiled at your phone before plugging it into the charger and going to sleep, airpods in ears playing forgive the world by nessa barrett.

a few hours later, around 3:00am, chris snuck into the bedroom. he was almost completely blackout drunk, having partied extremely hard since it was his first time out in awhile. he snuck his way into bed, trying his absolute hardest not to wake you. he fell asleep quickly, the drinks in his system immediately making him tired as soon as he touched the bed. everything was okay…

at around 4:30am, you needed to use the bathroom. you sat up a bit and smiled for a second as you looked over at chris sleeping before you saw them… hickies. you know for sure that you and chris hadn’t had a make-out session in awhile so your brain instantly thought of the worst. you had never felt more betrayed. sure, people could say you were overreacting but when you had been with chris as long as you had..? it stung…

you got up, deciding not to wake chris up in anger, and walked into the bathroom shutting the door and sinking to the ground. if he had hickies on his neck, what else did he do last night..? did he forget that he had a girl at home who loved him with everything she had in her..? your brain overloaded with thoughts of disappointment and anger. you sat there and cried before a soft knock was heard on the other side of the door… it was chris. “babe, are you ok? it’s been a few minutes and i thought i heard sobs… also i need to vomit like crazy…” he was massively hungover but still trying to take care of you. little did he know that your anger was about to spill over…

“fuck you.” was the only words that came out of your mouth as you swung the door open, pushing past him and speedwalking into the kitchen. you snatched your keys off the counter with no hesitation, chris thoroughly confused in the doorway. before you left, he questioned you. “woah, woah, ma, what’s going on? why you leaving?” he said, grabbing your shoulders and spinning you around. “why?! that’s all you have to ask?! i don’t know, chris, maybe look in the damn mirror at the piece of shit on your neck to find out!” you shouted, pushing out of his grip and slamming the door as you walked out. you walked to your car and got in, slamming that door as well. you sat in there for a minute, searching your mind for a sign to stay but the anger taking over…

you drove off with tears starting to roll down your cheeks. chris stayed still in the kitchen as nick and matt woke up from the yelling and door slamming. “what the fuck was that, kid?” matt asked, rubbing his eyes as he spoke. chris didn’t say a word. he knew he had fucked up. and now he had to figure out how to get you back… meanwhile, you were on the backroads going 95 in a 30, pissed. you wanted to find that girl and strangle her but you knew you couldn’t and shouldn’t. you’d always had anger issues… but seeing another girl’s ‘love mark’ on your boyfriend… it pushed you over the edge. your car speakers were blasting strangers by ethel cain and your tears just kept streaming. at the part of the song where she sings “am i making you feel sick?” you scream and continue to speed, your heart overflowing with anger as you think of what that girl did with chris… if he was bored of you and that’s why he did it…

chris was sitting on the couch, his brothers scolding him for how he could do that to you when you’ve been so good to him. he was just sitting there, getting attacked until he had finally had enough… “look! i get it, okay! i fucked up. i didn’t know i had gotten that drunk nor did i know that that girl was on me, kissing my damn neck! if i wasn’t so stupid, i know, none of this would have happened. i shouldn’t have done this and i need to fix it but i don’t know how! you know i’m not good with relationships…” chris shouted as he stood up. his eyes suddenly had tears dwelling and his face had softened to a face full of guilt. nick sighed before he spoke up. “chris. go find her. you know she likes the backroads, maybe you’ll find her there..” chris nodded, grabbing the van keys and running to the garage. within minutes, he was off to find you.

the sky was sparkling with stars as you sat in an empty field, car parked and you sitting outside of it, sobbing. you were staring at the stars wondering why the hell god had done this to you when you suddenly heard another car roll up near by. you got scared for a second and just sat behind your bmw, trying to hide. then you heard a voice…

“y/n? can we talk? please?” fuck. it was chris. you stood up slowly, glared look shooting into chris’s eyes. “what do you want, kid. don’t you got that other girl to go talk to and be around?” you knew you were probably overreacting even more than earlier, especially with those words but you didn’t care. everything hurt. the only man you had ever given your trust to had blatantly betrayed you even after you gave him everything. and you were pissed. “look, i need you to listen to me… the hickies… i-“ chris sighed before stepping towards you. you were still looking at the ground, trying not to cry before he grabbed your chin with his pointer finger and thumb, lifting it to make you look at him.

“y/n. i love you so much. and i never meant to hurt you. i was drunk as fuck… and i know that’s no excuse for letting another girl kiss me and touch me… but i never meant for it to happen. if i had known, god, i would’ve shoved her off in a heartbeat…” he tried to explain. you were on the verge of crying again, your heart breaking at his words. you knew he loved you… but you were still hurt… “chris… i want to forgive you but- i gave you my trust. first man to ever truly gain it and you destroyed it in one night.. i just- don’t know how to feel..” you said, tears beginning to fall, your heart shattering.

chris also felt his heart break at your words but knew you were right. “i know, ma and i’m so sorry… but you have to trust me… i want you to know that everything i do is for you. my heart beats for you, my life revolves around you because the only woman i’ve ever truly loved besides my mom has been you, y/n.” with chris’s words, your body softened. you knew he meant it. not because he was spilling his heart but because he was crying… he once told you that he never ever cried and if he did, he’d be crying over his family or anyone he deeply, truly care about. your face softened as you suddenly found yourself falling into his arms.

he hugged you back, tears streaming down his face. his head was still pounding and his body felt weak as he was still partially drunk and partially hungover but he didn’t care. he knew what he said was true and he hoped you knew it too… everything in the world melted away as his arms wrapped around your waist and his head felt into the nook in between your neck and shoulder. you cried as well, your tears spilling onto the back of his shirt. “chris.. i love you too.. but that hurt. like really fucking hurt.” you spoke into his shoulder, your voice partially muffled. he sighed before speaking once again. “i know, babe, i know and i am so incredibly sorry. but i will do whatever it takes to make it up to you because- i can’t lose you, y/n…” you smiled softly at his words before pulling away from the hug, eyes closing as you leaned in. your lips latched onto his softly, pulling him into a gentle, loving, and forgiving kiss.

he kissed back, pulling you closer into him as you melted into his touch. you both pulled away with sweet smiles on your faces as your foreheads touched and your heart decided to give him a second chance… no matter what this man did, somehow in some way, even if your brain and heart thought it for awhile, he could never make you feel sick… and you could never make him feel sick either…

“guess i got some date ideas i gotta whip up to make up for this, huh?” chris asked, still holding you. “yes you do, weirdo.” you said with a smile, walking back to your car as you told him you’d meet him at the house. once you two got back, matt and nick had already gone back to bed seeing as it was around 5:15am. you smiled before you practically ran to chris’s room, flopping on the bed as chris giggled behind you. “someone’s excited to go back to sleep. i can’t blame you though, i feel like shit.” you chuckled at his words as he fell into bed next you, grabbing you and pulling you onto his chest. “no more drinking as hard as you did and you should be fine, babe.”

with a few more soft giggles and smiles on your faces, you both drifted back off to sleep, issue resolved and hearts full once again…

𝙙𝙞𝙫𝙞𝙙𝙚𝙧 𝙘𝙧𝙚𝙙𝙨 𝙖𝙧𝙚 𝙞𝙣 𝙢𝙮 𝙧𝙚𝙗𝙡𝙤𝙜𝙨 𝙖𝙣𝙙 𝙡𝙚𝙩 𝙢𝙚 𝙠𝙣𝙤𝙬 𝙬𝙝𝙖𝙩 𝙮𝙤𝙪 𝙜𝙪𝙮𝙨 𝙩𝙝𝙞𝙣𝙠! 𝙞𝙩 𝙜𝙤𝙩 𝙖 𝙡𝙞𝙩𝙩𝙡𝙚 𝙧𝙪𝙨𝙝𝙚𝙙 𝙩𝙤𝙬𝙖𝙧𝙙𝙨 𝙩𝙝𝙚 𝙚𝙣𝙙 𝙖𝙣𝙙 𝙞 𝙖𝙥𝙤𝙡𝙤𝙜𝙞𝙯𝙚 𝙗𝙪𝙩 𝙞 𝙬𝙖𝙣𝙩𝙚𝙙 𝙩𝙤 𝙜𝙚𝙩 𝙩𝙝𝙞𝙨 𝙥𝙤𝙨𝙩𝙚𝙙 𝙣𝙤𝙬 𝙩𝙝𝙖𝙩 𝙛𝙞𝙣𝙖𝙡𝙨 𝙖𝙧𝙚 𝙤𝙫𝙚𝙧! 𝙤𝙣𝙘𝙚 𝙖𝙜𝙖𝙞𝙣 𝙜𝙞𝙫𝙚 𝙢𝙚 𝙗𝙡𝙤𝙜 𝙞𝙙𝙚𝙖𝙨 𝙖𝙣𝙙 𝙠𝙞𝙨𝙨𝙚𝙨 𝙛𝙧𝙤𝙢 𝙡𝙚𝙚𝙣𝙖 <3

word count: 1.9k!

#Spotify #chris sturniolo #chris sturniolo angst #chris sturniolo fluff #sturniolo triplets

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darkreaderdan · 1 year ago

Text

₪₪₪₪₪₪₪₪₪₪₪₪₪₪₪₪₪₪₪₪₪₪₪₪₪₪₪₪₪₪

ᴍɪᴄʜᴀᴇʟ ᴄʀɪsᴛ 𝒂 𝒄𝒉𝒂𝒓𝒂𝒄𝒕𝒆𝒓 𝒂𝒏𝒂𝒍𝒚𝒔𝒊𝒔

✲꘏ ꘏ ꘏ ꘏✲꘏ ꘏ ꘏ ꘏✲꘏ ꘏ ꘏ ꘏✲꘏ ꘏ ꘏ ꘏✲꘏ ꘏ ꘏ ꘏✲

Okay so this is a post that I have been planning for a while now to be honest. Devil's Night Series as been a series that honest got me hooked on reading again and all the characters hold a special place in my heart especially Michael and Rika. I have bared witness to all the hate that Michael gets and as a person who like and can relate to him on some level it actually rub med wrong. I also find it crazy how Michael and Emory are literally the same character in different font but Michael gets a lot more hate. (𝒂𝒏𝒅 𝒊 𝒄𝒂𝒏 𝒎𝒂𝒌𝒆 𝒂 𝒘𝒉𝒐𝒍𝒆 𝒔𝒑𝒓𝒆𝒂𝒅𝒔𝒉𝒆𝒆𝒕 𝒑𝒐𝒔𝒕 𝒐𝒇 𝒕𝒉𝒆𝒊𝒓 𝒔𝒊𝒎𝒊𝒍𝒂𝒓𝒊𝒕𝒊𝒆𝒔) But this is a Michael post so I will be sticking to just my analysis of him and maybe this can shed some light on his actions and have a discussion. Keep in mind this isn't me trying to justify the shit he does but instead explain his actions.

❦ So first I wanna touch on who Michael is as a person. We have seen throughout the series and especially in Corrupt that he is a for the most part a loyal person especially when it comes to his chosen family which at the start of the series was solely the other 3 horsemen. But let's go see where this stems from. Michael is considered to be the black sheep of his family despite being the eldest son. We have seen in flashbacks that his father has an unwavering hatred towards him ever since he was younger (a literal toddler), even though we never found out the reason why. I have a theory however, that Evan's hatred stem from the fact that Michael is similar to him when it comes to their stubborn mindset making him harder to manipulate and control compared to Trevor who is literally his father's dog. Now back to regular program... this dysfunctional dynamic in his family is what lead him to find companionship, brotherhood and trust in Kai, Will and Damon. They became his real family. He has proven time and time again that he would and will do anything to protect or even avenge them. He was always giving them advice and even cleaning up after them whenever they fuck up, which we know is a lot.🤣🤣 But nonetheless because of his pact and loyalty he will do all this even at a risk of hurting himself both physically and emotionally.

❦ During the events of Corrupt it is noted on several occasion that he is also extremely self destructive. This can be explained as a direct result of his upbringing. One of the things that I realize that alot of readers and fan of the series like to skip over is the extreme abuse that Michael suffered at the hands of his father. I get that as opposed to Damon and Emmy, it wasn't a main highlight in his novel so people tend to downplay it or outright ignores it. Michael was physically & mentally abused by his father simultaneously for years, from his childhood to when he was mid to late teen (he was 16 if i recall correctly). It was at this time that he finally fought back against Evan, with Rika being an unknowing witness to the event that lead to the stop of the physical abusing but the increased in the verbal and mental abuse. And where was his mom during all of this? Acting and being oblivious ofc. But we can see that he still; in present day Corrupt; is affected by his fathers words which reflects in his self loathing and believing he doesn't deserve to be happy or the love of anyone, especially not Rika. The Rika he loved and his world revolved around since he was 3. The same Rika that his dad as been grooming and basically training to be the perfect match/wife for Trevor. And he would rather continuing to live in emotional pain than accepting that someone can love him, that's why he was so hellbent on avenging his friends at the risk of burning the bridge with Rika in the process.

❦ I will be the first to admit that he is blunt, brutal and overall mean in his speech especially at times when he speak to Rika. Michael is not one to cut words and will things in the most brutal of ways especially when he is angry or hurting as I genuinely believe he is one of those 𝘩𝘶𝘳𝘵 𝘱𝘦𝘰𝘱𝘭𝘦, 𝘩𝘶𝘳𝘵 𝘱𝘦𝘰𝘱𝘭𝘦 type person who believe that if they are hurting others should too. Though for some reason this doesn't extend to when it comes romantic feelings. Wit that let's focus on his interactions with Rika. Even from the first encounter we saw of the two of them we knew that they had history between them and that their relationship runs deep, this is something that is immediately confirmed. I think one of the biggest issues that the fandom have against Michael is that he is hard on Rika, which is true, but the thing is I think readers are so used to the MMC babying the FMC that the concept of hard love is so alien to them. I will say though some of the things he did say to her are beyond harsh and outright so fucking cruel, like calling her just a pussy or even this:

"𝙰𝚗𝚍 𝚝𝚑𝚊𝚝'𝚜 𝚠𝚑𝚢 𝚢𝚘𝚞'𝚕𝚕 𝚊𝚕𝚠𝚊𝚢𝚜 𝚋𝚎 𝚠𝚎𝚊𝚔," 𝙸 𝚝𝚑𝚛𝚘𝚠 𝚋𝚊𝚌𝚔. "𝚈𝚘𝚞 𝚔𝚗𝚘𝚠 𝚠𝚑𝚢 𝚖𝚘𝚜𝚝 𝚙𝚎𝚘𝚙𝚕𝚎 𝚒𝚗 𝚝𝚑𝚎 𝚠𝚘𝚛𝚕𝚍 𝚊𝚛𝚎 𝚞𝚗𝚑𝚊𝚙𝚙𝚢, 𝚁𝚒𝚔𝚊? 𝙱𝚎𝚌𝚊𝚞𝚜𝚎 𝚝𝚑𝚎𝚢 𝚍𝚘𝚗'𝚝 𝚑𝚊𝚟𝚎 𝚝𝚑𝚎 𝚌𝚘𝚞𝚛𝚊𝚐𝚎 𝚝𝚘 𝚍𝚘 𝚝𝚑𝚎 𝚘𝚗𝚎 𝚝𝚑𝚒𝚗𝚐 𝚝𝚑𝚊𝚝 𝚠𝚒𝚕𝚕 𝚌𝚑𝚊𝚗𝚐𝚎 𝚝𝚑𝚎𝚒𝚛 𝚕𝚒𝚟𝚎𝚜. 𝚃𝚑𝚊𝚝 𝚊𝚗𝚒𝚖𝚊𝚕 𝚠𝚊𝚜 𝚒𝚗 𝚖𝚒𝚜𝚎𝚛𝚢, 𝚊𝚗𝚍 𝚢𝚘𝚞 𝚠𝚎𝚛𝚎 𝚒𝚗 𝚖𝚒𝚜𝚎𝚛𝚢 𝚠𝚊𝚝𝚌𝚑𝚒𝚗𝚐 𝚒𝚝. 𝙽𝚘𝚠 𝚑𝚎'𝚜 𝚗𝚘𝚝 𝚜𝚞𝚏𝚏𝚎𝚛𝚒𝚗𝚐 𝚊𝚗𝚢𝚖𝚘𝚛𝚎." "𝙸'𝚖 𝚗𝚘𝚝 𝚠𝚎𝚊𝚔," 𝚜𝚑𝚎 𝚊𝚛𝚐𝚞𝚎𝚜, 𝚋𝚞𝚝 𝚑𝚎𝚛 𝚌𝚑𝚒𝚗 𝚝𝚛𝚎𝚖𝚋𝚕𝚎𝚜 𝚊𝚗𝚢𝚠𝚊𝚢. "𝙰𝚗𝚍 𝚠𝚑𝚊𝚝 𝚢𝚘𝚞 𝚍𝚒𝚍 𝚍𝚒𝚍𝚗'𝚝 𝚖𝚊𝚔𝚎 𝚖𝚎 𝚑𝚊𝚙𝚙𝚢. 𝙸𝚝 𝚍𝚒𝚍𝚗'𝚝 𝚖𝚊𝚔𝚎 𝚖𝚎 𝚏𝚎𝚎𝚕 𝚊𝚗𝚢 𝚋𝚎𝚝𝚝𝚎𝚛." 𝙸 𝚜𝚖𝚒𝚕𝚎 𝚗𝚊𝚜𝚝𝚒𝚕𝚢. "𝚈𝚘𝚞 𝚝𝚑𝚒𝚗𝚔 𝙸'𝚖 𝚋𝚊𝚍? 𝚈𝚘𝚞 𝚝𝚑𝚒𝚗𝚔 𝚕𝚎𝚜𝚜 𝚘𝚏 𝚖𝚎? 𝚆𝚎𝚕𝚕, 𝚐𝚞𝚎𝚜𝚜 𝚠𝚑𝚊𝚝? 𝙸 𝚍𝚘𝚗'𝚝 𝚐𝚒𝚟𝚎 𝚊 𝚏𝚞𝚌𝚔 𝚠𝚑𝚊𝚝 𝚢𝚘𝚞 𝚝𝚑𝚒𝚗𝚔! 𝚈𝚘𝚞'𝚛𝚎 𝚊 𝚝𝚑𝚒𝚛𝚝𝚎𝚎𝚗-𝚢𝚎𝚊𝚛-𝚘𝚕𝚍 𝚙𝚒𝚎𝚌𝚎 𝚘𝚏 𝚋𝚊𝚐𝚐𝚊𝚐𝚎 𝚖𝚢 𝚏𝚊𝚖𝚒𝚕𝚢 𝚑𝚊𝚜 𝚝𝚘 𝚕𝚘𝚘𝚔 𝚊𝚏𝚝𝚎𝚛 𝚝𝚑𝚊𝚝'𝚜 𝚐𝚘𝚒𝚗𝚐 𝚝𝚘 𝚝𝚞𝚛𝚗 𝚒𝚗𝚝𝚘 𝚗𝚘𝚝𝚑𝚒𝚗𝚐 𝚋𝚞𝚝 𝚊𝚗 𝚎𝚒𝚐𝚑𝚝𝚎𝚎𝚗-𝚢𝚎𝚊𝚛-𝚘𝚕𝚍 𝚌𝚘𝚙𝚢 𝚘𝚏 𝚢𝚘𝚞𝚛 𝚍𝚛𝚞𝚗𝚔 𝚖𝚘𝚝𝚑𝚎𝚛!"

❦ This was just uncall for, but it goes back to what I mentioned before of him believing that if he is hurt, everyone should also hurt, not an excuse but merely an explanation. And as harsh as he is some of his actions are from his perspective a way of teaching her to be stronger and fight her own battles and not wait on others to come to her rescue. He was the first to recognize her fire help her make it shine brighter:

"𝙾𝚠𝚗 𝚠𝚑𝚘 𝚢𝚘𝚞 𝚊𝚛𝚎. 𝙰𝚗𝚍 𝚍𝚘𝚗'𝚝 𝚊𝚙𝚘𝚕𝚘𝚐𝚒𝚣𝚎. 𝙳𝚘 𝚢𝚘𝚞 𝚞𝚗𝚍𝚎𝚛𝚜𝚝𝚊𝚗𝚍? 𝙾𝚠𝚗 𝚒𝚝 𝚘𝚛 𝚒𝚝 𝚠𝚒𝚕𝚕 𝚘𝚠𝚗 𝚢𝚘𝚞." -

"𝘈𝘯𝘥 𝘧𝘳𝘰𝘮 𝘔𝘪𝘤𝘩𝘢𝘦𝘭-𝘢𝘴 𝘸𝘦𝘭𝘭 𝘢𝘴 𝘋𝘢𝘮𝘰𝘯, 𝘞𝘪𝘭𝘭, 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘒𝘢𝘪-𝘐 𝘭𝘦𝘢𝘳𝘯𝘦𝘥 𝘵𝘰 𝘣𝘳𝘦𝘢𝘵𝘩 𝘧𝘪𝘳𝘦. 𝘐 𝘭𝘦𝘢𝘳𝘯𝘦𝘥 𝘵𝘰 𝘸𝘢𝘭𝘬 𝘢𝘴 𝘪𝘧 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘱𝘢𝘵𝘩 𝘸𝘦𝘳𝘦 𝘤𝘢𝘳𝘷𝘦𝘥 𝘧𝘰𝘳 𝘮𝘦 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘮𝘦 𝘢𝘭𝘰𝘯𝘦, 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘵𝘰 𝘵𝘳𝘦𝘢𝘵 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘸𝘰𝘳𝘭𝘥 𝘢𝘴 𝘪𝘧 𝘪𝘵 𝘴𝘩𝘰𝘶𝘭𝘥 𝘬𝘯𝘰𝘸 𝘐 𝘸𝘢𝘴 𝘤𝘰𝘮𝘪𝘯𝘨." - 𝘙𝘪𝘬𝘢.

❦ Another instance that I see people always judging him about is the events of Conclave which I find fucking ridiculous cause he literally reacted how any normal person would. For month Rika as been distant from him, all methods and efforts to try and get through to her as been futile, fast forward to that night on the ship, he walked in on his fiancé in the arms of his best friend finding comfort, when she has been brushing him off for months. Rightfully so both him and Banks were upset but everyone tend to only judge him. Come to find out that the woman he loves thinks so low of him, that he would leave her because of fertility issues and even confided in someone else. So yea him walking away from the situation was honestly a normal and natural reaction. Like he is allowed to feel and react like anyone in his shoes would. and I find it crazy how people love saying he doesn't care for, love or respect Rika when there is evidence proving otherwise.

𝑹𝒊𝒌𝒂 𝒊𝒔 𝑴𝒊𝒄𝒉𝒂𝒆𝒍'𝒔 𝒘𝒐𝒓𝒍𝒅. 𝑱𝒖𝒔𝒕 𝒂𝒔 𝒉𝒆 𝒊𝒔 𝒉𝒆𝒓 𝒘𝒐𝒓𝒍𝒅 𝑻𝒉𝒆𝒚 𝒂𝒓𝒆 𝒍𝒊𝒌𝒆 𝒂 𝒓𝒐𝒂𝒓𝒊𝒏𝒈 𝒇𝒊𝒓𝒆. 𝑾𝒉𝒆𝒓𝒆 𝒕𝒉𝒆𝒚 𝒅𝒐𝒏'𝒕 𝒃𝒖𝒓𝒏. 𝑻𝒉𝒆𝒚 𝒄𝒐𝒎𝒑𝒍𝒆𝒕𝒆 𝒆𝒂𝒄𝒉 𝒐𝒕𝒉𝒆𝒓.

"𝑰 𝒄𝒂𝒏'𝒕 𝒇𝒐𝒍𝒍𝒐𝒘 𝒕𝒉𝒆 𝒓𝒖𝒍𝒆𝒔," 𝒉𝒆 𝒔𝒂𝒚𝒔, "𝑨𝒏𝒅 𝒘𝒊𝒕𝒉 𝒚𝒐𝒖, 𝑰 𝒅𝒐𝒏'𝒕 𝒉𝒂𝒗𝒆 𝒕𝒐. 𝑰'𝒎 𝒏𝒐𝒕 𝒂𝒍𝒐𝒏𝒆. 𝑰 𝒄𝒂𝒏'𝒕 𝒈𝒐 𝒃𝒂𝒄𝒌 𝒕𝒐 𝒃𝒆𝒊𝒏𝒈 𝒂𝒍𝒐𝒏𝒆." 𝑯𝒆 𝒉𝒐𝒗𝒆𝒓𝒔 𝒐𝒗𝒆𝒓 𝒎𝒚 𝒍𝒊𝒑𝒔, 𝒐𝒖𝒓 𝒎𝒐𝒖𝒕𝒉𝒔 𝒐𝒑𝒆𝒏 𝒂𝒏𝒅 𝒉𝒖𝒏𝒈𝒓𝒚. "𝑰 𝒄𝒂𝒏'𝒕 𝒇𝒖𝒄𝒌𝒊𝒏𝒈 ��𝒓𝒆𝒂𝒕𝒉𝒆 𝒘𝒊𝒕𝒉𝒐𝒖𝒕 𝒎𝒚 𝒍𝒊𝒕𝒕𝒍𝒆 𝒎𝒐𝒏𝒔𝒕𝒆𝒓.

𝑾𝒆 𝒌𝒏𝒐𝒘 𝒘𝒆𝒍𝒍 𝒕𝒉𝒂𝒕 𝒕𝒉𝒆 𝒘𝒐𝒓𝒍𝒅 𝒇𝒐𝒓 𝑴𝒊𝒄𝒉𝒂𝒆𝒍 𝑪𝒓𝒊𝒔𝒕 𝒉𝒂𝒔 𝑬𝒓𝒊𝒌𝒂 𝑭𝒂𝒏𝒆'𝒔 𝒏𝒂𝒎𝒆 𝒃𝒓𝒂𝒏𝒅𝒆𝒅 𝒐𝒏 𝒊𝒕. 𝑻𝒉𝒆 𝒘𝒐𝒓𝒍𝒅 𝒊𝒔 𝒉𝒆𝒓𝒔. 𝑭𝒐𝒓 𝒉𝒊𝒎, 𝒊𝒕 𝒘𝒊𝒍𝒍 𝒂𝒍𝒘𝒂𝒚𝒔 𝒃𝒆 𝒉𝒆𝒓𝒔.

𝑰 𝒄𝒐𝒖𝒍𝒅 𝒌𝒊𝒔𝒔 𝒉𝒆𝒓 𝒇𝒐𝒓𝒆𝒗𝒆𝒓. 𝑻𝒐𝒖𝒄𝒉𝒊𝒏𝒈 𝒎𝒚 𝒇𝒐𝒓𝒆𝒉𝒆𝒂𝒅 𝒕𝒐 𝒉𝒆𝒓𝒔, 𝑰 𝒓𝒂𝒏 𝒎𝒚 𝒕𝒉𝒖𝒎𝒃 𝒂𝒄𝒓𝒐𝒔𝒔 𝒉𝒆𝒓 𝒇𝒂𝒄𝒆, 𝒄𝒂𝒓𝒆𝒔𝒔𝒊𝒏𝒈 𝒊𝒕. "𝑰 𝒍𝒐𝒗𝒆 𝒚𝒐𝒖, 𝑹𝒊𝒌𝒂. 𝑰'𝒗𝒆 𝒂𝒍𝒘𝒂𝒚𝒔 𝒍𝒐𝒗𝒆𝒅 𝒚𝒐𝒖."

𝑺𝒉𝒆 𝒂𝒏𝒅 𝑰 𝒘𝒆𝒓𝒆 𝒕𝒉𝒆 𝑺𝒂𝒎𝒆, 𝒂𝒇𝒕𝒆𝒓 𝒂𝒍𝒍. 𝑾𝒆 𝒇𝒐𝒖𝒈𝒉𝒕 𝒕𝒉𝒆 𝒔𝒉𝒂𝒎𝒆 𝒆𝒗𝒆𝒓𝒚 𝒅𝒂𝒚, 𝒔𝒕𝒂𝒈𝒈𝒍𝒊𝒏𝒈 𝒘𝒊𝒕𝒉 𝒘𝒉𝒐 𝒘𝒆 𝒄𝒐𝒖𝒍𝒅 𝒍𝒆𝒕 𝒔𝒆𝒆 𝒕𝒉𝒆 𝒓𝒆𝒂𝒍 𝒖𝒔, 𝒂𝒏𝒅 𝒘𝒆'𝒅 𝒇𝒊𝒏𝒂𝒍𝒍𝒚 𝒇𝒐𝒖𝒏𝒅 𝒆𝒂𝒄𝒉 𝒐𝒕𝒉𝒆𝒓.

"𝑶𝒖𝒓 𝒔𝒄𝒓𝒂𝒑𝒆𝒔 𝒂𝒏𝒅 𝒃𝒓𝒖𝒊𝒔𝒆𝒔, 𝒕𝒂𝒕𝒕𝒐𝒐𝒔, 𝒔𝒄𝒂𝒓𝒔, 𝒔𝒎𝒊𝒍𝒆𝒔, 𝒂𝒏𝒅 𝒘𝒓𝒊𝒏𝒌𝒍𝒆𝒔 𝒕𝒐𝒍𝒅 𝒐𝒖𝒓 𝒔𝒕𝒐𝒓𝒊𝒆𝒔, 𝒂𝒏𝒅 𝑰 𝒅𝒊𝒅𝒏'𝒕 𝒘𝒂𝒏𝒕 𝒂 𝒑𝒓𝒊𝒔𝒕𝒊𝒏𝒆 𝒑𝒊𝒆𝒄𝒆 𝒐𝒇 𝒘𝒂𝒍𝒍𝒑𝒂𝒑𝒆𝒓. 𝑰 𝒘𝒂𝒏𝒕𝒆𝒅 𝒉𝒆𝒓 𝒂𝒏𝒅 𝒆𝒗𝒆𝒓𝒚𝒕𝒉𝒊𝒏𝒈 𝒔𝒉𝒆 𝒘𝒂𝒔."

❦ Like you can bring up that he didn't apologize to her and it is clear that this is one of people's biggest freeze moment but let's not forget that people have different ways for expressing themselves and in MichaelRika case, they have proven over and over again on multiple occasions that they prefer and believe in actions over words. Rika wanted Michael to show her that he is sorry to basically dedicate his life to her and guess what? He did just that.

❦ I could go on more but as this post turn out longer than I anticipated I will end it her on this note. Michael to me is the perfect representation of a complex character, he is a product of cause and effect and it shines through alot through the series. I wanna finish by saying that I am in no way shape or form defending his actions but simply highlighting and explaining them.

#michael crist #michaelrika #devils night #devils night corrupt #erika fane #devils night series #rika fane #michaelerika #penelope douglas

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