#( jaal voice: ryder NO )

[hustlemeanokay]

Okay, so - we know I'm super excited about DA:Ve to come out. But, here's the thing. Bioware's done it again and let me explain.

When Mass Effect Andromeda came out; everyone lost their minds over Jaal. And yeah - he's a great character. BUT... to this day - I have never been able to have my Ryder romance him. And this is due to one reason and one reason only. His voice actor sounds like James Earl Jones and I cannot hear romance lines in James Earl Jones's fucking voice. I can't. Mufasa can't be over here all "hey baby", nope - nope, nope, nope. Can't do it. I'll die wheezing.

That leads me to Veilguard. And Lucanis. And I don't think I have to explain because it's already been pointed out. But... yeah... Lucanis sounds like fucking Antonio Banderas as Puss In Boots and I'm sorry but it's incredibly difficult to take him seriously in that fucking voice. Which, I'm bummed about because yeah - he looks like an awesome character and what I've read about him has been amazing! Alas... I just can't with that voice 😂. We'll see if I can eventually get used to it but I doubt it. He'll be the new Jaal for me - a great companion but not a character I think I'll be able to romance simply because of the voice.

[jarino]

First Contact

Bridget Ryder comes in contact with a brand new species and meets her angaran crew member for the first time.

AO3 Link

Exiting the Tempest, Bridget holds her arms above her head in what she hopes is the universal gesture of peace. Numerous guards crowd around her, weapons drawn. They appear tense and mutter in a language that her translators can’t yet pick up on. She’s tempted to ask SAM how the translation process is going, but worries the natives might consider it a threat and instead holds her tongue.

As she nears the end of the ramp, one of them approaches her, seemingly asking a question from the tone of their voice. Unsure how to respond, she stands still as they scan her. She’s tempted to make a joke about taking her shoes off, but thinks better of it and remains silent.

“Eham daar goss,” the alien behind her says.

“Nasen roa.”

She still can’t understand a word they’re saying, but when the barrel of a rifle nudges her from behind, she gets the hint to move forward.

As they guide her away from her ship, she tries to look around without being too conspicuous.

The architecture is like nothing she’s ever seen before. She would love to get a better look if she weren’t currently held at gunpoint. Curious citizens crowd around them, with children peeking behind their parents’ knees to get a glimpse at the strange new alien that’s appeared.

By the time Bridget approaches a stairway where a regal blue figure addresses her, SAM’s translation seems to have taken effect.

“I’m Paaran Shie, governor of Aya. We are the angara.” She holds herself tall, looking down upon Bridget with judgmental eyes. “And who are you?”

Bridget bows her head slightly, hoping to show respect. “My name is Bridget Ryder. I’m a pathfinder with the Initiative.”

“Yes, you crossed darkspace. I’ve heard of your journey.”

A new angara arrives then; a large purple man with a flowing blue shawl.

Turning to him, Paaran says, “Jaal…I have this in hand.”

The newcomer waves her away dismissively before interrupting, “Evfra saw the ship come in and sent me to find out what’s going on.”

Paaran explains Bridget’s purpose to him as he approaches her; taking slow, measured steps down the stairs. Clear blue eyes bore into her, his gaze utterly chilling. His large frame towers over her and as he approaches, Bridget finds herself taking a half step back.

Before she knows it, he is right there; his face scant inches from hers. He envelopes her entire space and looms in a rather threatening manner.

“Aya is hidden…protected,” he growls with a hint of menace. “What do you want?”

Bridget stammers as she attempts to think of a proper response. Damn, he is big. And there are still the guns pointed at her back. This has so much potential to go poorly.

“I-I’m sorry,” she stutters quickly. “Landing here, without warning…on fire, was…not the plan…”

A long, painful silence follows her pitiful attempt at diplomacy and she cringes internally, anticipating the gunfire that will put her down.

Surprisingly, it never comes.

Jaal looks her over carefully, his gaze even and calculating, as he answers, “Good to know…Because if it was, that would be a very bad plan…”

He stares at her for a while longer before the corners of his mouth tilt up into a fraction of a smile. It happens so quickly, Bridget is almost convinced it didn’t happen at all.

“I’ll inform Evfra. He’ll be waiting for you in his office at the resistance headquarters,” he says, not looking at her. “I’ll meet you there.”

Paaran accompanies Bridget through the city, though it’s by no means a friendly tour. The armed guards still stand behind her, a constant reminder that any small slip up will result in her being taken down.

Now that she can understand their language, the harsh words they whisper amongst themselves become clear as day.

They call her a thing, a monster…and they worry of the danger she represents. She supposes she can’t blame them for their fear...Colonizers have never been harbingers of good luck. If she had known the cluster was already populated, she never would have agreed to this role in the first place.

They arrive at the headquarters shortly and Bridget spots Jaal speaking with a younger angara. She only catches bits of their conversation, but it looks as though Jaal is giving him advice. The young man clearly admires him.

When they part, the adolescent stares her down, making no attempt to hide his curiosity and distrust as he glares daggers at her.

Bridget sweats under the pressure, shrinking back slightly. She’s taken aback by how open his appraisal of her his.

“Our experiences with the kett make us naturally distrustful of all aliens,” Jaal says by way of explanation.

She nods solemnly. “We’ve had our own run-ins with the kett.”

He looks at her, his eyes calculating, but his expression does soften a tad. “Then…you really do understand.”

Jaal explains how his people have been taken by the invaders; how they often never see their families again. Bridget tries to get him to elaborate but he merely tells her to save her questions for Evfra.

The man in question is extremely gruff and ill-tempered. Bridget attempts to plead her case for entering the vault, but the man doesn’t budge.

Meanwhile, Jaal seems captivated by what she tells them. There’s a certain curiosity he seems to carry in regards to her knowledge of the Remnant. He asks Evfra if he can follow Bridget on her journey, to act as his eyes. Begrudgingly, Evfra agrees. He leaves them alone then, telling Jaal to be prepared to strike should Bridget attempt to kill him.

Bridget can’t help but frown. She knows it must be difficult for them to trust her given everything that’s happened, but she’s still hurt by the accusation.

Jaal turns to Bridget and softly says, “I’m Jaal Ama Darav. I’ll be your envoy through Angaran space.”

Giving him a friendly smile, she extends her hand for a handshake. “Nice to formally meet you. It’s gonna be cozy so I hope you like people.”

He stares at her outstretched hand before he places the back of his hand against the back of hers. Confused, she tries to correct him by placing her palm in his. He lets out a grunt of frustration, holding her wrist firmly in place as he plants the back of his hand against hers once more.

Gruffly, he mutters, “I hope I don’t regret this.”

Bridget lets out a shaky sigh as he turns and walks away. His cold reaction stings just a bit. That definitely could have gone better…

She follows behind him in silence, her gaze glued to his large back.

All things considered, it was a better first contact than their experience with the kett, but it was still an incredibly rocky start. She can only hope that things will go smoother from here on out. So many people are counting on her…She needs this to work if they are to have any hope of survival.

Perhaps, in time, Jaal will come to trust her more. Maybe, if things go well, they can become friends.

——

I started this years ago and it's been sitting in my wip document ever since. I finally decided to finish it. It's not perfect, but at least it's done.

[sol-consort]

As much as you love the fact that humans are a sociable and communal species, I'm sure you're going to love the Angara.

Their society is based on the expression of emotions, being open and governed by well-being, not only physical and social but also psychological.

They have huge families where they are not even related by blood. And when a new couple forms, they literally merge the families' surnames.

You're absolutely right on the money! The more I'm learning about angara the more I'm falling in love with them.

The fact they wear their hearts on their sleves but are never naive. The fact they are so emotional intelligence and consider it the norm to voice their feelings out loud even if it causes disagreements because it let's people work through it.

Humanity is a constant masquerade, all the invisible tests and social cues. The angara literally defy a lot of the things we have stubbornly latched on into because of our fears.

We play hard to get, we lie about our feelings, we isolate and ghost people rather than face then head on. We downplay how much we love someone, we rarely hand out compliments.

We consider the first person who says "I love you" in a relationship to be the losing one. Love is war in humans. A constant test and guesswork.

So for the angara to come and simply...speak everything out loud? Without fear of embarrassment or rejection? It will intimidate so many humans.

The way Jaal complimented Peebee so openly and Cora tried to make him embarrassed about it but his only reaction was to compliment her too and she fell silent. We have to be constantly under 13 layers of irony to function, otherwise we die from embarrassment and shame.

Fuck when Jaal talked about having many mothers, I melted in my chair. Not only are they so beautiful looking with skin that reminds of galaxy and stars as their white markings, but they are so filled with love for each other.

Because at the end of the day, love is why any of us even bothers living. Be it love for one's children, or love for your passion work. Even love for another or simple love like videogames or dogs.

If love didn't exist, life wouldn't be worth living. We want to live and not just survive, we fall in love with the universe, art, concepts, and people constantly.

But none of us speaks it. And none of the speices in mass effect are bold enough to confess it. The closest ones were the humans with their enthusiasm and clear burning passion but even then, we let out actions speak our love rather than our words.

So, for the angara to come and achieve everything we've written millions of psychology guides for just naturally? The fact there was a couple clearly hugging each other and confessing their love inside the military resistance base so openly and their commander never barked at them to let go or stop? It's truly the alienating experience.

I envy them man. They have the social structures that humanity wished it had, constantly dreamed about but could never commit to. Because of our pride, our ego and fears.

I like to think the reason Ryder agrees to help the angara so much, not just to earn their trust but because humans see the angara and immediately have this urge to protect them.

They're so beautiful inside and out, so filled with love and acceptance for one another. So interested in their own community and safety. Fuck, the fact they need the sun to thrive is so poetic, they're like this beautiful garden of roses amidst such harsh environments. Of course, humans are gonna build a greenhouse to keep them alive during the winter. Are you kidding?

humans are such simps for these things.

Also, it is funny how the Angara and Protheons are on extreme opposite poles of one another.

[ageless-aislynn]

Oooo, you play mass effect, it finally clicked in my head. Who do you romance in Andromeda?

Also, I really did enjoy the game regardless of the amount of hate it got

ZOMG, you must've missed me at my most Andromeda obsessed, lol! I haven't actually been able to play it since last November, when my previous computer gave out and then this one has been super lousy. However, as soon as I can hopefully get my Vegas back on and thus be able to GIF (and vid) again, I'm planning on going back to Andromeda to finally finish the big Ryder twins romance GIF project I had going, lol!

In short, I've romanced every single option available except Scott/Peebee and Scott/Jaal. Scott/Peebee was in progress when I got derailed. But here are some posts I've made about various things, if you'd like to see them!

Sara's romances with Jaal, Reyes, Peebee and Vetra

Scott/Cora and the shocking, unexpected Scott/Harry romance 😂😜

I was working on the Scott/Gil vid here

I've vidded Sara/Reyes, Scott/Cora, Scott/Gil and my final vid ever was about Scott and his dad, Alec

Mass Effect: Andromeda incorrect quotes

Me at the bottom talking about doing an Insanity run and showing my Sara in her Mjolnir-like tanky armor plus the name of my crafted weapons 😂

I absolutely adore this game and I've honestly missed playing it so much! Also, did you know that Kate Kennedy aka Kai from Halo is the voice of one of the Angara?

I romanced Avela as Scott JUST for that fact alone, lol!

Anyway, like I said, I never did get the chance to finish making GIFs for all of my romances and I still hope to finish those last two for Scott. As for which are my favs...

Sara: Reyes. I'm a sucker for that scoundrel, what can I say? 😍😇 But Vetra is a close second. I have to physically restrain myself from flirting with her if I'm planning on romancing somebody else because there's no way I'd hurt my best Turian girl like that! 😱😉

Scott: Gil surprisingly became my favorite "I have to make SURE not to click the flirt options if I'm romancing somebody else" romance. I also, no surprise, loved his romance with Reyes. Cora also was great!

I honestly really enjoyed all of the romance options, except for Keri's (the reporter) and not for any fault of hers but I disliked how she looks kinda uncomfortable with either Ryder flirting with her while she's just trying to do her job. I felt like a real creep, I have to say! 😩Then at the end, after I've annoyed this poor Asari at her workplace this entire time, the "payoff" was we went from a table at the Vortex to Ryder's just suddenly outside of her room? Not even a kiss? 🫤(I legit have headcanoned that Keri never actually let Ryder into her room, just went in herself, closed the door, and left them out in the hall, lol! "That's for continuing to come on to me and never taking the hint while I'm clearly just doing my job, you creep!" 😖😂😉)

If I could've romanced Evfra *points up at his pic above* I totally would have because I'm a sucker for a good "enemies to lovers" trope, lol! And I think Evfra would haaaaate himself for falling for the human Pathfinder. 😍😍😍

I clearly have put a lot of silly thoughts into Andromeda, lol! Anyway, thanks so much for letting me ramble about this! Who did you romance? Have you played as both twins or do you prefer just the one? Default or custom? Do you mod? My computer was coming off the rails at the time so I've only stuck to what's available in-game but I've seen some beautiful Ryder twins and some awesome clothing options with mods. 😉💖💖💖

[writtenjewels]

Day Ten: Transform

Jaal watched the kett appear. Instinct told him to reach for his weapon, but Ryder and SAM were still working. All he could do was wait. One of the strange pods floated down and opened, revealing an angara. Jaal's heart jumped in his chest. Everyone knew that the kett abducted his people, and now he saw proof of it.

Dread filled him as the angara woke. The kett jabbed needles into the angara's chest, injecting it with something. Jaal anxiously pressed a hand to the glass separating him from his kin. Why couldn't SAM go faster? He hated feeling so helpless.

The angara began to twist, limbs twitching as a strange black substance formed over their body. It almost looked like the angara was melting. Their mouth was open and they were clearly in pain, but their cries were barely audible. As if the black substance was twisting their voice along with their body. Horror chilled Jaal's bones. He couldn't tear his eyes away.

The black substance molded itself into a new form. Flesh hardened, the face disappearing. Jaal could no longer breathe. His trained eyes recognized parts of this form, but his mind couldn't accept it. The form collapsed to the ground.

When the creature righted itself, it was no longer angaran. All that was stripped away, and in its place stood the face of the enemy. Another kett.

Jaal wanted to vomit.

[roadkillxd]

Entirely out of left field and six years too late, I wrote a ME:A smut drabble...

Kandros x Scott Ryder  ↪ 468 words — 18+ / SMUT

Content tags — cis male dominant Ryder, cis male submissive Kandros, xenophilia, hookups, mention of Scott having fucked an angaran before, dirty talk, teasing, handjobs, and fingering.

“I’ve always had a thing for turians,” Scott purrs, running light fingers over Kandros’ mandibles just to watch them twitch and shudder under the attention.

“Oh, yeah? Just any turian?” Kandros smiles, gripping Ryder’s hips, settling him a little more into his lap. 

“God, no. M’not one of those humans, trust me,” the man hums, “I have a type…”

“Care to inform me?”

“Mmm… I like big crests, and fringes. Makes ‘em look dominant… and, oh, long mandibles, the ones that hook upward in the back—it’s a shame you usually only see them in the women. Like Vetra… woof.”

Kandros chuckles, pressing (what passes as) kisses against Scotts neck, tongue dipping out ever so slightly to dampen the press of his hard lips.

Scott grasps the back of Kandros’ head, pulling him away gently to trace idle fingers over his face markings.

“And I like turians with tattoos, bright ones. I was told once, that markless turians can be… dangerous.”

“Hmm, stereotypical,” Kandros offers, “though, in most cases, very true.”

Scott chuckles, leaning down for a kiss, sucking eagerly on the turian’s pointed tongue. 

“Universally, though…” Scott murmurs, pressing his soft lips to Kandros’ mandible, against his neck (and Spirits, how can a predator's lips—entire body—be so soft?), “I like the small waists.”

Scott smiles, grabbing Kandros hips for emphasis, squeezing the plates there.

“Is that so?”

“And the voices… fuck. Your people, and the angarans, too. They drive me insane. That deep, resonating hum whenever you speak. Or fucking… Jaal. Or Evfra. Makes my cock ache.”

“Sounds like you just have a thing for military men, Ryder,” Krandos purrs, his subvocals vibrating with lust that has Scott’s spine shivering. 

“And did you know,” Scott continues, palm trailing down over Kandro’s scutes, down to his crotch to tease at his pubic plates, fingers between his slick slit, “the Angarans have a, uh, similar form of protection down here?”

Kandros gasps, subvocals twinging as he throws his head back and groans, feeling his cock slowly slipping free as Ryder’s fingers tease.

“They’re a lot softer, without the chitin, like a human woman… but, oh, Kandros,” Scott moans, and the tone makes the turian’s cock pulse, the tip peeking out from his slit, “their slits feel just as good as a turian’s to fuck. Tight and slick, their pretty cocks just as blue, pulsing with that fucking—bioeletric field…”

Kandros’ cock is fully exposed now, Scott stroking the slick member.

“But you know why I’ll always love turians the most?” Scott asks, his fingers trailing down Kandros’ shaft, “the Angaran are so… open. But turians… with all that self control. That discipline. I just love to watch them break.”

Ryder punctuates the statement by slipping two fingers into Kandros’ slit, massaging the sticky walls and making the turian cry out, subvocals oscillating wildly.

[mass-effect-anonymous]

CONFESSION:

I enjoyed Andromeda. I give it 6.5/10. There were moments when I thought it was amazing and moments where it was just meh. Loved Drack, Jaal and Vetra. I saw the potential it had. But there was one element that grated on me and that was Sara Ryder's voice. I managed one play with a female Ryder while I played twice witha male Ryder. Her voice was just aggravating. Sara sounded like she watched a lot of those cheesy teen films from the 1980s.

[clericofshadows]

For the headcanons, how’s about Joker? And/or! If you’ve ever played cyberpunk, maybe a V? Or even a Ryder from ME:A if you’ve played that one! (I have no idea what games people have played lol, trying for variety 😂)

I'll do all three!

Joker

Sexuality Headcanon: Bisexual (and should've been romancable!)

Gender Headcanon: Cis male

A ship I have with said character: Joker/Shepard

A BROTP I have with said character: Joker and EDI, which I answered in the EDI ask but it still stands, their friendship is great. Also Joker and Kaidan, starting with that banter in the beginning of the game. Would've loved to see more ribbing between them.

A NOTP I have with said character: While I don't ship Joker/EDI, it's not a really a NOTP, just a personal preference of mine.

A random headcanon: Joker collects hats and has a large collection he'll switch out when he's not on duty. Ranging from beanies to novelty ball caps, he has something for every occasion. EDI once got him a hat that says passenger princess, that he wears proudly because it's a great representation of her humor.

General Opinion over said character: While my Shepards may not always like him (looking at you, Regis), he's always been a character I've enjoyed talking to. My only wish is I could've agreed with him about Thessia.

----

V (like canon, my V is named Vincent)

Sexuality Headcanon: Gay

Gender Headcanon: Cis male with GNC tendencies

A ship I have with said character: V/Kerry (for when I do canon romance), V/Viktor (for when I start downloading mods to pose them together with AMM!)

A BROTP I have with said character: V and Misty. Catching up together over memories of Jackie and making new ones. Also V and Judy, my V is a netrunner so I imagine they can talk and nerd out over tech together.

A NOTP I have with said character: Don't really have one.

A random headcanon: Vincent was a corpo and I imagine he knew Viktor in passing through Jackie, so he fell for him pretty fast. They don't get together until after Vincent does the boxing quests and ends up going on a round with Vik....

General Opinion over said character: I typically play as male characters in voiced RPGs and V did not disappoint. I love my netrunner and knives using corpo, and I love making him a snarky asshole when I can. I need to play phantom liberty!

----

Atlas Ryder

Sexuality Headcanon: Pansexual

Gender Headcanon: Cis male

A ship I have with said character: Ryder/Reyes

A BROTP I have with said character: Ryder and Cora bond over biotics, Ryder and Jaal trick out weapons, and Ryder spends a lot of his time in engineering with Gil, learning the ins and outs of the ship.

A NOTP I have with said character: I don't really have a lot of NOTPs. Maybe for Atlas that would be Gil, they're better off as friends and from a meta perspective I was never a fan on how they handled the kid thing with their romance.

A random headcanon: Atlas went through the first few N trials before he was kicked out of the Alliance due to his father. He resents that he never finished it and wears the N7 proudly.

General Opinion over said character: I've always found Ryder to be a very refreshing protag and I enjoyed playing him as more sarcastic and logical when I could. Would've like to see more classic renegade options, but I loved MEA and would've loved to see Ryder and the gang some more.

[rpgwrites]

Finding Myself Again - Chapter 3: Moshae Sjefa

Story Summary:

Ryder thought she was waking up on Andromeda the first time, but this wasn't the case. People speak of a Ryder, of things she did in Andromeda that she doesn't remember. She feels uncomfortable in her own skin, and then there is an alien that says he loves her and wants to be there for her but she doesn't know him. And it's her job to find herself again. But can she do it?

Cindy myself Again - Chapter 3: Moshae Sjefa

"Jaal?"

He didn't recognize the voice. He wasn't sure if he knew the person or not. He didn't even know if it's a man or a woman.

Jaal was consumed with the hurt in his heart. Forget his throat that was burning. His heart burned. It didn't feel like he could cry. No. He felt like his heart could cry. And no one would know it except for him.

He turned around. Moshae Sjefa.

He cleared his burning throat. "Moshae."

"Were you at Ryder's room?"

He looked away. Jaal nodded, not trusting his own voice. 

She looked at him closer. "Oh Jaal. Come here my child."

Read it on AO3

[cyhaino]

Mass Effect Romance Opinions

Kaiden | he’s ok I like him just fine he usually dies in my playthrough though because my youngest sister is named Ashley and I feel weird letting someone with her name die does it make sense no but who cares I’m playing

Liara | You’d think I would love an alien archeologist and for the most part I do but when I’m not actively romancing her I find her a bit too much and I get annoyed in me3 with her whole planet being taken and her attitude about it as if Earth wasn’t the first planet taken

Ashley | I don’t romance her because of the name reason but I do like her. Also she was right about the council seeing humans as dogs.

Miranda | again I should like her but honestly prefer friendship over a romance just let her be with her sister

Tali | honestly see her as more of a a sister

Jack | love her, one of the few characters who actually has character growth but I’m still salty over not being able to romance her as female Shepard

Jacob | If you ignore the weird flirtatious tone when you go to talk to him, you’ll find he’s not that bad. He’s supposed to be the level headed character and he is for the most part. He does suffer from bad writing though and it’s pretty obvious too. Still I do like the me2 romance so I go through the pain but I do still get annoyed in me3

Garrus | nice voice but that’s it and I do like the tango dance in the dlc but honestly most of the time it felt like I was yelling at him. When I was younger he was my favorite but now that I’m older some of the stuff he says and does doesn’t sit right with me.

Thane | never romanced him because personally I would never ask someone out after they trauma-dumped like what the hell was up with that option??? Still I understand the appeal because hello??? Assassin???A distant dad who still wants the best for his son??? And he’s dying??? Why do I find all of this hot what does this say about me

Kelly | No

Samara | love her I want to marry her she deserves so much probably written by a man because hello we could have just adopted children why put her through that misfortune

Morinth | I love her mom

Steve | this man lost his husband fairly recently so no

Samantha | <3 favorite romance shes gay I’m gay what more do I need to say

Diana | she’s there I guess???

Javik | y’all say Garrus has a nice but nah Javik’s voice is way better I wish he was an actual romance option. Is he perfect? No but I doubt any of us would be in his situation. 10/10 would still bang

James | yes but no because I would have loved having him as an actual romance option but what bioware gave us was shit!!! Like what the hell!!! Thank god for fanfiction because what the hell!!!

Avela | I didn’t even know she was a romance option whoops

Cora | this woman screams lesbian romancing her as male Ryder feels weird

Gil | I hate his best friend

Liam | oh I love him he was the first romance I did his little wave his flips! And his loyalty mission is one of the best ones to do so much fun and ahhhh when he takes you out on Eos for that date!!!! I love Liam

Suvi | she’s cute but eh that’s it

Peebee | one of the more fleshed out romances in my opinion however romancing her as male ryder feels weird and I think it’s better to romance her as female ryder.

Jaal | yeah I’m a Jaal girlie my ao3 history will attest to that. He tried so hard to come across as cool and mysterious but he’s just a bisexual disaster like me and ahhh the forehead touch!!! And of course his voice???

Vetra | you give me hot turian girlfriend and I give you all my money. Also she’s an eldest daughter and as an eldest daughter myself, yeah I’m gonna gravitate towards her. Her romance feels really short though

Reyes | bioware made sure he wasn’t a full romance option because they wouldn’t be able to handle two bisexual Latinos

[much-obliged-timothy]

Whumpcember #8

Mass Effect Andromeda - #8 - Faked Death

*

Watching it was unbearable and dangerous.

Yet Reyes stood, hood pulled over his disguised face, shifting uncomfortably in the padded shoes meant to make him taller. An urn rested on a small, recently-built platform.

He had never intended to attend his own funeral, but his worry over Ryder saw him here regardless.

Ryder stood, his sister on one side of him and Liam on the other. He leaned heavily into his sister, and Sara put her arm around him, resting her head on his shoulder. 

Reyes crept closer carefully. The way Ryder’s shoulders shook broke his heart. He’d never seen such a strong man look so weak.

It had been necessary. That’s what Reyes had told himself, at least, as he engineered the plot.

His enemies had been dangerously close to discovering his identity as the Charlatan. Rather than risk the chaos that would cause, Reyes and Keema had arranged to fake his death.

It had been careful. They’d quietly captured and killed an enemy, dressed him in Reyes’ clothing. Reyes had accepted a meeting he knew was a trick. With Keema and a few highly trusted men in tow, Reyes went into the building he knew he was supposed to die in.

Sure enough, he was locked inside and the building was set ablaze. Keema helped him escape and plant the body of the man, who burned down to bone. Then she went back in and confirmed it was his body, planting his weapons on it as proof.

It was temporary. Just until they could find and kill everyone who threatened Reyes’ true identity. 

But he couldn’t tell Ryder. Ryder’s reaction is what sold the ruse. It was a key part of the plan, and the part that tore Reyes to pieces the most.

Liam touched Ryder’s arm. “Do you want to say anything, Ryder?”

Ryder lifted his head and slowly turned to face the gathering. Reyes was pretending to be one of three friends of Keema’s who had known Reyes. He was thoroughly disguised, but still ducked his head a little as Ryder’s anguished eyes swept over the small group of people here to mourn.

“Reyes wasn’t perfect,” Ryder said. “He could be a real shady bastard sometimes.”

“Sometimes?” Jaal said, and a small ripple of laughter broke the tension in the crowd.

Ryder gave a weak, sorrowful smile. “Alright, a lot of times he could be a real shady bastard. But he…he was so much more than he ever got credit for. He was a cheesy romantic that liked to slow dance. He was a free man who loved nothing more than to fly across an open sky. He was a leader who wanted to bring peace.”

Reyes felt himself choking up. Ryder thought so highly of him. And here was Reyes, being that lying, shady bastard everyone else knew he was. 

He did not deserve Ryder. He knew he would never be forgiven for this.

“You look like you’re waiting for someone,” Ryder said. “That’s what he said to me. The first words. And he was right. More right than I knew at the time.” He looked at the urn, with the ashes of a stranger sealed inside. Tears brimmed in Ryder’s eyes and pain flared in Reyes’ heart. “I’ll be waiting for the rest of my life for someone who will never come back.”

Reyes wanted to scream that he was right here, he was alive, it was a cruel plot. But he couldn’t, not with Kadara at stake like this. If he revealed himself, it also put Keema in danger. He was too tangled into his own scheming to ease Ryder’s pain.

Ryder was crying silently now, stepping back to his sister for comfort. She held him tightly, whispering soothingly in his ear as he clutched at her. 

“You are watching his trust in you die,” Keema said quietly. “He will never recover from this, even if he comes to understand why it was necessary.”

“Don’t you think I know that?” Reyes said, his voice numb even as every other part of him ached at this turn of events.

He’d imagined building a future with Ryder in a hostile galaxy that they tamed together. He’d opened himself up, promising honesty, always knowing he could expect it in return. Ryder would never lie to him - not about the big stuff. That was the whole basis of their relationship. 

And here was Reyes, killing Ryder in a way the Archon never could.

His pain was excruciating as he watched the most beloved and cherished person in his life cry for him. No one had ever loved him so much. No one had ever trusted him so much.

He accepted the pain he felt now. The pain Ryder would feel when he learned the truth would be worse, and Reyes just hoped it wasn’t enough to shatter him in the end.

[satashiiwrites]

Fuck it Friday

tagged by @monsterrae1 to share something for Fuck it Friday. Thanks for the tag! Tagging whoever wants to play along, @tkwritesdumbassassins @outtoshatter (no pressure) or anyone else who wants to play along.

Posting an older wip that I should totally work on at some point…

Title: If I See You in My Dreams

Fandom: Mass Effect Andromeda

Pairing: MReyder as always

Tags/warnings: first draft. Reyes has prophetic dreams and it doesn’t always end well for him or his family historically.

Keema stared at him for a moment, hesitating before joining Evfra and the others.  “Sholaon?” She asked quietly.

He shook his head, biting his cheek instead of speaking.  Sara and half of Scott’s team was still in there and Scott didn’t need him too.  Reyes just needed to convince his feet to move and be productive doing something—anything—that wasn’t here. 

Gently patting his jaw with her hand, Keema gave him a pitying look before she entered the small medbay. She purposefully left the door ajar instead of letting it close behind her. 

“Scott Ryder—I hope you are well,” her greeting carried out into the hallway, spoken loud enough for Reyes to easily hear. 

“Keema,” Scott’s voice was a bit soft but still distinct. “I’m okay.  How are you.”

“I am good Scott Ryder.”

“Do I have to remind you it’s just Scott? Again?” 

Keema laughed. “At least once more Sholaon.”

There was nervous laughter that sounded like Scott’s.  “So how did you know we needed your help?  You got here so fast that it couldn’t have been the distress call.”

There was a pregnant silence with neither Evfra nor Keema answering. “Yes how did you know how to find Meridian?” Jaal—the smug bastard—asked.  

Evfra cleared his throat.  “We were forewarned and it is good that we got here in time to assist.  Had the Kett taken Meridian it would have been difficult to unseat them.”

“Yeah it would have,” Scott agreed. “But seriously.  Who alerted you?  I didn’t know you guys had such good kett intel.”

Reyes could feel the awkward silence and visualized Keema and Evfra debating what to tell his lover since Scott didn’t seem to be in the know. “You should ask our mutual friend,” Keema finally said. 

“What?”  Scott’s question was pure confusion while a woman’s voice Reyes sort of recognized asked, “Who’s your mutual friend?” 

More silence.  Reyes rubbed at his face tiredly, 

“Forewarned.  You said you were forewarned.”  His lover sounded like he was deep in thought. 

“Yes.  As I have been told you humans have a saying that forewarned is forearmed.”

Scott snorted. “Of course he’d say that.”

There was a few titters from what sounded like Peebee and Liam as well as a growl from Jaal.  Why was he the one angaran who didn’t like Reyes on sight? Had he offended Jaal in a previous life?  

He didn’t need to stand here listening to this.  Scott was up and talking.  He’d… he’d find Reyes later or Reyes would just message him to stop by Kadara when he had a chance.   Reyes slunk away down the slightly tilted hallways and out onto the surface, using the same emergency hatch exit he’d used to climb aboard the Hyperion.  Finding his people, he started directing them to help with the cleanup of the remaining kett forces.  They needed to make sure none escaped.

Quickly becoming buried in the work of organizing and coordinating between the Kadaran forces and the Resistance, hours slipped by and night fell.  Reyes was nose deep in a compiled local map projection and talking with the scouting groups when he became aware that someone was standing behind him. 

“Red-5 keep your heading. Take Red-3 and Blue-8 with you. There’s a tangle of the Scourge ahead so keep your speed down and reply back every five.”

“Acknowledged.  Reply back every five,” the pilot said. “Red-5 out.”

Dimming the map so it wasn’t blinding him, Reyes looked over his shoulder to see Scott had managed to escape the infirmary and was leaning against a stack of crates.  He was wearing a soft looking Initaitve hoodie with his arm in a sling but his legs were still encased in armor and his boots that were pretty scuffed up.  His vida looked tired, eyes bruised and skin pale as he studied Reyes with eyes that were gleaming electric blue in the reflected light from the map. In his hands he had two mugs that steamed invitingly and he held one out to Reyes. 

“How are we doing?”  Scott pointed his chin towards the dimmed map. 

Reyes shrugged and took a sip of the coffee which must have come from the Hyperion. “Mop up.  It’ll take a bit.”

Scott frowned, eyes following the movement of fighters on the map.  “How many kett are the still finding?”

“More than a few.”  There had been a surprising number of kett fighters that had scattered after the Verakan had been scuttled by the Architect.  There wasn’t much left of the Archon’s flagship but they’d had to push the other dreadnaught into crashing into the Scourge and that ship had time to try and evacuate so they were hunting all the escape pods and fighters that had been ejected before it’d blown. 

Silent, Scott was still looking at him.  “What?”

“Evfra said that the intel about the Archon heading to Meridian came from you—before I sent out that distress call.”  He said it as a statement not a question.

“Yes?”  Reyes deflected. “You needed help.”

Scott’s lips twisted as he pressed them together in displeasure. “How did you know?  You knew before.”

“Are you accusing me of something?” Reyes asked mildly, not admitting to anything.  He was curious what was going on in his vida’s head. 

“I’m not.  I just find it interesting how you’re able to know these things.  It’s almost like…”

“Like what?”

“Like you can see the future.”

Reyes scoffed, nervous and trying to deflect.

“Don’t,” Scott said sharply, setting his mug down and approaching Reyes until there was less than a handbreadth between their chests, eyes searching Reyes’ face.  “You’re scared. Of what I’m not sure.”

“I’m not scared of you,” Reyes admitted softly, shoulders slumping. “I… it’s difficult to talk about.”

“How you got the intel?” 

“No—well yes.”  Scott was scowling now but he was reaching for Reyes to draw him in closer, free arm wrapping around his waist to close the gap between their bodies. 

“You know you can tell me anything right?  That what you tell me stays between us?  I may be Initiative but you and me… we’re… we’re what? Boyfriends?”

“Partners,” Reyes disagreed immediately trying not to make a face at being tagged Scott’s boyfriend. “Boyfriends implies we are just trying each other out.”

“And we’re not,” Scott agreed. 

“We’re more than boyfriends… at least to me,” Reyes admitted softly. 

“Good to know I’m not the only one.” The scowl disappeared but there was still a worried wrinkle around the eyes. “But seriously Rey, you can tell me anything.”

“What if this changes how you feel about me?  What if it’s… something that makes you think differently of me?”  He hadn’t been this anxious about telling Keema as he’d been too terrified at the time of Scott dying. 

Scott shook his head in swift denial. “I think there’s very little you could say that would change how I feel about you… which… I’m pretty sure I’m in love with you.  I know it hasn’t been that long but I can’t imagine my life without you in it.”

“Mi vida,” Reyes couldn’t stop himself and he was kissing Scott, hands coming up to cup around his face to get a better angle after setting the coffee down. Scott went willingly, mouth opening under Reyes’ as they shared breath. It was like coming home and it settled something in Reyes as they moved against one another.  Scott was alive and here in his arms, out of danger and in love with him. 

His dreams were coming true. All of them and it wasn’t the ones bathed in pain and blood. 

Pulling back to breathe, Reyes leaned his forehead against Scott’s with his eyes closed.  “Sometimes… sometimes I see things.”

The arm around his waist squeezed and released but still held him. “What kind of things?”

Reluctantly, Reyes opened his eyes.  This close, Scott’s eyes were the sapphire blue of twilight and focused fully on him. “Possible futures… and sometimes the past.”

“Really?”  Scott didn’t sound like he disbelieved Reyes but instead like he was processing. “Like how?”

Shrugging, Reyes tried to put a bit of distance between their bodies but Scott didn’t let him escape. “I dream every night… and the closer it is to the present the sharper it gets as there are less possible outcomes.”

“And it comes true?”

He could only nod, trapped by Scott but unwilling to pull away again. 

“Huh.”  Scott looked thoughtful, gaze unfocused as he processed Reyes’ confession.

“I thought for the longest time that I wouldn’t get to meet you.”

“What?”  Scott’s eyes sharpened and the arm tightened again. “What do you mean?”

Biting his lips, Reyes tried to explain. “I saw…something terrible happening.  War and so many deaths—genocide. It was why I joined the Initiative.  I thought it would take me away from you.”

“How long have you been seeing me in your future dreams?”

“Since before I can remember.”  Scott had been there forever except for the almost two years before the Hyperion had entered Heleus after he’d awakened from six hundred years of cryo which he thankfully didn’t remember any dreams from. 

Scott stared at him. “You’ve… you’ve been dreaming of me that long?”

Blushing, Reyes dropped his eyes to look down at Scott’s chest. “You’ve been the love of my dreams forever.”

Scott shifted and that band-like arm released him so that it could catch his chin and tilt it so he had no choice but to look at Scott so he closed his eyes.  He didn’t want to see the shock and horror he was sure he’d find. “Rey—look at me please.”

“No.  Mi vida please I mean that I’ve—“

Scott shut him up by kissing him again.  When he spoke it was against Reyes’ mouth. “You’ve been in love with me that long?”

Nodding dumbly, Reyes didn’t resist when Scott went back to kissing him, tongues tangling. Somehow, he ended up stumbling backwards into a stack of crates, Scott’s body pressing firmly into him like he wanted to climb under Reyes’ skin. Trapped between Scott and the hard surface, Reyes could only cling to his vida. 

“You’re going to be the death of me,” Scott whispered against his mouth. “I think you would only have to ask me and I’d do anything for you.”

“Never that,” Reyes said horrified. “Mi vida—“

“Love you,” Scott interrupted.  “So tell me… what do you see in our future. A bed?”

Caught flat-footed, Reyes looked around them.  There was nothing but stacked crates and anyone could wander by at any time. Scott snorted and then was laughing, his weight still pinning Reyes against the crates. 

“It doesn’t quite work that way,” Reyes grumbled. 

“Oh it doesn’t does it?  Because I definitely see a bed in our future.”

“Where?”  Reyes gestured. 

“I do have a suite on the Hyperion… with a very comfortable bed… and possibly a shower,” he said wrinkling his nose.  “We’re both kinda gross and I don’t know about you…”

That was when Red-5 did his five minute check in and made them freeze. “Red-5 no kett sightings. Continuing on our heading.”

“Acknowledged,” Reyes said into his comm before flicking it back off. “I need to continue coordinating.”

“But later?” Scott arched an eyebrow suggestively. 

“Later.  Give me an hour or two?”  He should have the majority of this done by then and he could hand off anything that wasn’t. 

“Fine,” Scott sighed leaning in for another brief kiss. “But only an hour or two and then I expect you in our bed.”

“Our?”

Backing up with a mischievous grin, hair disheveled from where Reyes’ hands had been tangled in it, Scott purposefully gave a long leer at Reyes. “What’s mine is yours? What’s yours is mine?”

Laughing, Reyes could only nod in agreement. “Yes mi vida. Let me get this finished and I will join you.”

“Can’t wait.  Don’t make me hunt you down again.”  Scott disappeared in the maze of packing crates with a wink.

[jarino]

It Will Heal

When Jaal's family is taken by the Roekaar, he asks Bridget to trust him. That's not the problem. Trusting Jaal is as easy as breathing. What isn't so easy is watching as a madman nearly kills the man who has stolen her heart.

AO3 Link

Bridget can’t think. She can’t breathe.

All she can think about is how horribly wrong things have gone.

When Jaal desperately begs for her aid, explaining that Akksul has recruited his siblings into the Roekaar, she agrees to help without hesitation.

When they come across said siblings on the battlefield, and they begin bearing down on her with insults, she tries her best to keep her cool. Even as they tower over her and spout that she’d be better off dead, she doesn’t retort. She doesn’t want to feed into Akksul’s poisonous beliefs about her kind.

Even when Lathoul is shot and tells them of the bombs that have been planted, she doesn’t lose her focus. She remains fixed on her goal.

It isn’t until they reach the Forge proper that things begin to spiral.          

Once they disarm the bombs, Teviint runs to Jaal, clinging to him like the scared child she is. “I killed Lathoul! I killed him. I’m so sorry.”

Bridget stares at her in concern. This girl can’t be more than a teenager, and yet Akksul is using her as a weapon, twisting her confusion into a tool for his hatred.

Jaal, however, is less sympathetic. He stares down at her coldly, not offering a hint of comfort. “He’s not dead. You’re lucky”

She looks up at him, her expression so lost and afraid. “I lost my mind, Jaal. I want to go home.”

“But the cause!” Baranjj protests. “I joined because of you!”

“I shot our brother,” Teviint counters, looking at him as though he grew a second head.

He looks down in uncertainty, his hands balling into fists at his sides. He seems just as scared and anxious as his sister. Looking back to her, he says, “Don’t leave me-”

“Let her go.” He is cut off by Akksul appearing from the shadows, stalking forward like a villain. “I only want soldiers who are committed to our cause.” His icy gaze turns to Bridget and Jaal and he sneers, “Not weaklings who stand by and watch the destruction of our people at the hands of aliens.”

More Roekaar filter in from the upper level of the Forge, their weapons all trained on their little group. Akksul stands proudly, assured in his upper hand.

Teviint seems to shrink back, hiding behind Jaal. Baranjj also tries to make himself smaller, pulling into himself. Bridget feels herself bristle in anger. “You recruit kids and make them fight their families,” she spits, glaring at the Roekaar leader. “It’s sick and so are you.”

Akksul seems unbothered by her accusations. Stepping forward, he says assuredly, “I speak for our people and I say you’re done in Heleus.”

He raises a hand to gesture towards Bridget and she instinctively lifts her rifle, aiming at him. Simultaneously, Jaal warns her not to, but Akksul is already grinning.

Chuckling maliciously, he leans into her personal space, the barrel of the gun pressing against his chest. “Martyr me.” He urges. “Please. I dare you.”

Bridget stares him down, hissing out an exhale. Jaal had asked her to trust him on this mission, to follow his lead. And killing Akksul certainly wouldn’t plead a great case for her, especially considering his followers still have their weapons trained on her.

Everything about him infuriates her. But she somehow remains calm.

“I made a promise to my friend that you’re making really hard to keep,” she growls.

His smile falls, and he stares at her in frustration for a long while before turning his attention back to his followers.

“They move onto our planets. They they take our resources, make us weak!”

“I’ve watched Ryder make planets habitable!” Jaal appeals to the angara, his voice impatient but resolute.

“Exactly!” Akksul retorts. “And they’ll never let us forget it.”

“She rescued your beloved Moshae!” Jaal interrupts, and it has the Roekaar leader pausing.

“I know,” he admits quietly, spurring his supporters to look at one another in uncertainty.

“Saved. Her. Life,” Jaal continues, his words punctuated and strong.

“I know, stop defending them!” Akksul says indignantly, beginning to sound like an annoyed child.

Not paying him any mind, Jaal attempts to keep going. “The Moshae trusts Ryder, and-”

“Stop.”

Akksul cuts him off by aiming his gun at Jaal, clearly threatened that he’s losing control of the situation.

Jaal looks at him warily, taking a half step back and raising his hands defensively.

“We’ve been fighting the wrong enemy,” Akksul rambles. “Maybe the enemy is this traitor!”

Lowering his hands, Jaal stares him down resolutely, muttering a quiet warning, “Easy…”

Panicked, Bridget raises her gun to Akksul once more, looking at her angaran companion in distress. “Jaal?”

She hates that her voice sounds so small.

God, what is she supposed to do here? Akksul is clearly crazy. He claims to want to protect the angara, but here he is threatening to kill one of his own. She’s not about to let him take Jaal’s life. And yet, as has already been established, shooting him is off the table, too…

“Don’t!” Jaal warns, sparing her a glance and a careful gesture, his eyes pleading with her. Trust me, they say.

She does. Of course she does. It’s Akksul she doesn’t trust.

Turning his full attention back to the man before him, Jaal’s gaze hardens. “The Moshae trusts Ryder. You’ve become a danger to your own people,” he utters lowly. “Walk away.”

Reason isn’t reaching Akksul, though. Gritting his teeth, he retorts, “Or…I kill you and reveal the Resistance for the traitors they are!”

He pulls the trigger and a sharp, panicked scream tears itself from Bridget’s throat. If everyone’s attention wasn’t focused on Akksul and Jaal, she’s sure she’d be getting looks for the anguished sound she just made. But that isn’t at the forefront of her mind right now.

Jaal’s dead. He’s dead and she did nothing to stop it. She’s trembling uncontrollably, her gun still pointed at Akksul, but she’s frozen in place.

She wants to kill him. Wants to make him pay for killing the man she was easily falling in love with. He deserves it. But as desperate as she feels right now, she made a promise to Jaal…and she’s not about to break it now.

A pained groan draws her attention and her gaze immediately snaps in its direction.

It can’t be…

Akksul missed. He was at point-blank range and he somehow managed to miss. The bullet grazed Jaal’s cheek, leaving a small, shallow cut in its place. Blood trickles down his face as he stares Akksul down unwaveringly.

Bridget wants to cry with relief. To hold him close and reaffirm that he’s okay. But she can’t quite get over the shock of thinking he was lost to her, no matter how brief.

Everyone gapes at the scene in utter awe and disbelief.

Jaal has commanded the attention of the entire Forge, and rightfully so.                

Akksul looks up at his followers, a lost, uncertain expression on his face. The Roekaar begin to filter out, shaking their heads in disgust as they do.

Staring Akksul down, Jaal carries a powerful weight to his gaze.

“The alien is not the monster here,” he declares with conviction.

Akksul does not answer right away. His focus is on the angara turning their backs on him. “I love my people…” he utters quietly, looking down in defeat.

Bridget believes it. Unfortunately, his heart has been poisoned and twisted beyond recognition. She wonders what he might have been like had he not been captured by the kett. Despite all the hurt he’s caused, she pities him in that moment.

 Jaal does not deign to respond to him, but he seems to come to the same conclusion as Bridget. After a long moment of staring at his former classmate, he turns to his siblings and says, “Come on…let’s get you home.”

Following quietly, Bridgets walks slightly behind him. She glances up at Jaal, noticing the trail of torn flesh that had been carved by the bullet, blue trickling lightly from the edges. She can’t believe how close he came to dying. Any closer to the right and he would have been gone from her life entirely. Hell, it’s a miracle the bullet didn’t hit his cowl either. She’s not terribly familiar with angaran anatomy, but she’s certain there must be vital blood vessels there.  The fact that he stands before her relatively unscathed is astronomical.

The blood that had begun pooling at the edge of his wound spills over slightly, running down his cheek. She reaches out, but stops short of touching him. “You okay…?”she asks quietly.

He spares her a glance before saying, “Yeah, thanks…” before letting out a strained grunt, a wince pulling at his lips.

They make there way back in relative silence. On the shuttle, Bridget can’t help but stare at Jaal the whole way, a sense of numbness overcoming her.

A bandage now rests over his injured cheek, but it didn’t make her feel any better.

He almost died. He almost died and she almost let it happen. Granted, she knows that shooting Akksul would have been a terrible idea, but she just can’t stop thinking about it. She cares about Jaal more than she ever thought possible. At this point, it’s more than a silly crush. Even though she knows he doesn’t return her feelings, the thought of losing him…Of never again getting to tease him about idioms or spend time working on projects together…It tears her heart apart.

She can feel Vetra’s eyes on her throughout the ride back, but her companion remains silent, for which she is grateful.

At some point, they land back where they started, Teviint apologizing to Lathoul and the mothers coming to reunite with their lost children. Jaal gently puts his hand on her shoulder and guides her to the side. She follows, her gaze still hollow and empty. She’s barely processed anything since Akksul fired his pistol.

“Thank you for trusting me,” Jaal tells her, looking out over the landscape. “Killing Akksul would have made the Roekaar stronger.”

He’s so calm. Too calm. Infuriatingly calm. He’d almost died for fuck’s sake!

It’s enough to snap Bridget out of her apathy. “He shot you,”she says, bitter.

“I’m glad he did. It exposed how far he’d fallen.”              

Even still, he remains composed and collected. He even smiles.

Bridget stares at him in disbelief. “Jaal, you were this close to dying back there! Do you have any idea how risky that was?!”

He has the audacity to chuckle at her and she bristles.

“It all worked out, didn’t it? A little risk was worth it, I’d say.”

She can’t believe it. Here she is, tearing herself apart with worry and he has the gall to think her reaction is amusing.

“You idiot!” she cries, banging her fist against his chest. “You think it’s funny that you almost had your brains blown out?” She hits him again, and he takes small steps back with each advance, staring down at her with wide, surprised eyes.

“Is your life that meaningless to you?” she continues, tears beginning to form. “Or am I just stupid for daring to care that I might lose you?!”

Bridget stops assaulting his chest, though her fists still rest there, trembling. Her gaze has fallen to the ground and she shuts her eyes tightly, the tears now falling freely. Her frame shakes as sobs begin to wrack her body.

He instantly pulls her close to him, cradling her in his embrace.

She does her best to suppress her crying, though it takes her a minute. The desperate kiss he presses against the crown of her head makes it even more difficult to pull herself together, but eventually, she calms down enough to speak.

“I was really worried…” she ends up whispering, her voice somewhat hoarse.

Jaal pulls back just enough to look her in the eyes. His expression is pained, his brows drawn together in worry. Gently, he lifts a hand to wipe her tears, his thumb drawing careful arcs across her cheek.

Carefully, he pulls her forehead to his, and they both close their eyes as they lean into each other. “It will heal,” he murmurs. “All scars do.”

She sniffles slightly, her arms pulling Jaal into as tight of a hug as she can, though his bulky torso makes it impossible for her embrace to completely encircle him.

“I apologize for worrying you…” he says quietly, one hand absently petting her hair.

She doesn’t respond, just pulls him even closer.

They stay like that for a long while, and when they do part, he makes sure to plant another feather light kiss atop her head.

Bridget looks up at him, her expression full of confusion and longing. He softly trails his hand down the side of her face. He stares at her for an achingly long time before clearing his throat and stepping back. She misses his warmth immediately.

“We should get back…” he says, looking back towards the others. “I want to say goodbye before my family heads home.”

Absently, she nods, watching as he heads over.

She tries not to focus on the kisses or the gentle touches. Jaal is a naturally affectionate person. He was just comforting her. It doesn’t mean anything more. Thinking that it might…that’s just setting herself up for more hurt. She doesn’t need to do that to herself.

At least he’s alive.  She can cling to that.

Sighing, she gradually makes her way back to the group.

She pushes her longing down. Far enough away where she can try to forget that he’s captured her heart so thoroughly.

——

So I haven't written anything in over 3 years...but I have an actual excuse this time. Long story short, cancer sucks. (Don't worry, I'm not in danger of dying, but having chronic pain the last few years honestly hasn't been much better...)

In any case, I've really missed writing and finally found the inspiration to finish this after starting it years ago. I have a few more projects I hope to work on, though I can't say how many more of them will be Andromeda related.

[tacticalvalor]

«────── « HEADCANON » ──────»

An interesting thing about Pelessaria (aka Peebee) is the fact that her father was not also an asari. Rather, Peebee is the offspring of an elcor father and her Asari “mother”.

This is in contrast to her half-sister, who was the offspring of an asari “father” and asari “mother”.

Note how I’ve put quotations around the words father and mother when referring to Peebee’s parent and stepparent. This is because the asari are a mono-gender race and can fill both paternal and maternal roles, despite having a primarily maternal instinct. The asari, like most Mass Effect species, are rather interesting in their biodiversity when compared to humans!

Here are a few facts about the asari’s cultural applications of gender:

Asari are a mono-gendered species with no concept of gender differences. At the same time, asari are often viewed as an all-female race.

To humans at least, asari appear female with breasts and voices that sound female. Even among the asari, many individual asari are referred to as “she” and “her“, but some asari prefer male pronouns, while others gravitate toward gender-neutral where language allows.

Asari also bear feminine titles like “huntress” and “matriarch” and asari offspring are referred to as “daughters“, however the asari may have chosen feminine pronouns to simplify language translations.

And, to tie back to the original point of this post, here are some details about how the asari reproduce:

Asari can mate and successfully reproduce with any other gender or species through a form of parthenogenesis. Although they have one gender, they are not asexual and do in fact require a partner to reproduce.

An asari provides two copies of her own genes to her offspring, one of which is passed on unaltered. The second set of genes is altered in a unique process called melding, also known as the joining or the union. During melding, the eyes of the asari initiating the meld dilate as she consciously attunes her nervous system to her partner’s, sending and receiving electrical impulses directly through the skin, however physical contact is not strictly necessary. Effectively, the asari and her partner briefly become one unified nervous system, sharing memories, thoughts, and feelings. 

The offspring is always an asari, regardless of the species or sex of the “father” and in the case that the offspring is of two asari, the father is the one who does not give birth.

So what’s interesting in Peebee’s circumstances is that, due to the nature of sharing memories, thoughts, and feelings during this reproductive cycle, with her father being an elcor, there are unique characteristics that she possesses through her personality and psyche.

The elcor have a rather unique perspective on emotions and communication, so much so that “… a human smile seem[s] as subtle as a fireworks display.” Naturally, it’s come to mean that among the elcor, the smallest of gestures mean the world in terms of communication! Granted, their verbal communication tends to fall ponderous and monotone (so much so that they must prefix their dialogue with an emotive statement: “excited, this is good news to hear”). Additionally, elcor culture is built on small, tight-knit groups.

And we can see this through Peebee’s dialogue and interactions with the Tempest crew!

Even examining her relationship with the Pathfinder alone, Peebee tends to keep most people at an arm’s length and really linger between what she considers to be her home. She constantly holds this “one foot out the door” mentality, and doesn’t become entirely close with the crew (primarily Jaal and the Pathfinder) until they spend time together doing things. A notable example is found in her email after the Pathfinder joins her in zero-g within the Tempest escape pod:

So much better! To: Ryder From: Peebee (the chill)

Typically, I’m not the type to send mail. At least, not mail that just reflects or lingers on stuff. But I’m okay letting you know how great our float was for me. And the weird thing is, I think it was actually better with you there. Added a little bumper car whimsy.

Hmm. You might be growing on me a little. Not sure if that’s good or bad. But I’m not going to ponder that right now. Wanna stay chill.

–Peebee

While I can’t say I know this is true for all Asari/outside species offspring, I do think it’s interesting how this may have transferred in Peebee’s circumstances. I believe it may have even played a big role in why her failed relationship with Kalinda is so impactful on her.

And why she gets along with Jaal so well, as angara culture is very emotionally focused as well.

[natsora]

Writer’s game: first sentences!

Rules: post the first sentence of your last ten fics. If you haven’t written ten fics, share as many first-sentences as you have. Thank you for tagging me @fogsblue!

Tagging @wickedwitchofthewilds @hardcore-like-eezo @tungstenb @crackinglamb No obligations

Lodestone - A Cassandra Pentaghast / Female Inquisitor fic Cassandra bowed her head low, panting hard, as she sheathed her blade.

The Candidate - an original fiction set in my FML world So, before I’ve worked as an agent, I was a broke student, trying to make ends meet.

14 Days of DA Lovers 2021- 2023 - A series of prompt fills featuring Cassandra Pentaghast / Female Inquisitor “Maker give me strength,” Cassandra hissed as she spurred her horse to go faster.

Only Beggars, No Choosers - A Mass Effect and Arcane crossover gen fic featuring femshep and fRyder “Why are they after us?” Shepard shouted.

With a Bang - A Evfra / fRyder fic A red dress draped over Ryder’s frame — a body honed over years of combat training and active duty.

Privacy Mode - A Evfra/Jaal/Akksul/fRyder smut fic Somehow, being stuck in a room, forced to sit through hours and hours of Tann shooting down all Ryder’s plans and initiatives for the coming financial year, had planted his voice into her brain.

The Warforged and Her Dwarf - an original fiction featuring ace main characters Time turns all to dust and worm food.

Tiny Cuts - Whump Prompt Fills - a series of TAT whump prompt fills Broken! Trev grits her teeth.

Fragile Hearts - A Cassandra Pentaghast / Female Inquisitor fic “Do it again,” Trev laughed.

Locked In - an original fiction set in the far future where people volunteer to be turned into super soldiers. Fei would sighed if he could, if his breathing wasn’t controlled by a tube down his throat, if he wasn’t fucking bedridden and unable to bat even a fucking eyelid — because his eyes were taped shut.

[hellt00th]

i romanced jaal this round and theres a conversation that made me fucking choke jaal says something about never imagining he'd fall for an alien so ryder responds "you're the alien" and they go back and forth with "you" "no you" a time or two and then jaal just "I want to devour you. In the best way." his voice got SO DAMN DEEP BRO LMAO