#'not feeling lonely i just like being alone' but it's less true than i like to think it is

[aquamarinemarie]

When Did They?

If you're like me and believe Solas and Lavellan had a sexual relationship during the events of Inquisition, then you've likely given some thought pertaining to when exactly the relationship turned physical.

For me, the relationship became physical following Solas' love confession on the balcony.

I believe this for a few reasons.

Firstly, and most flimsily, the scene ends with Solas walking towards the door. This can indicate that either he left the room... or perhaps he went to lock the door. 👀

Secondly, it is directly after this scene that the rumors in regard to Solas and Lavellan being a little less than professional with one another truly begin to circulate.

Cabot, the barman, reveals the people of Skyhold are gossiping about the Inquisitor's love life and complaining about her having time to bed her allies. In addition to Vivienne and Sera both noticing a change in the happy couple.

“Is it my imagination, dear, or have certain… lingering looks passed between you and our Solas?” – Vivienne

“I’ve seen how you look at him. You’re in it. Bet he calls out “Elven glory” when he does it.” – Sera

I love that their eyes are giving them away, and that they both can't seem to hide their feelings for one another.

Now thirdly, and perhaps most importantly, Solas' love confession follows the conclusion of All New, Faded For Her.

I don't think this is a coincidence.

As up until this point Solas has been reluctant to become romantically involved with Lavellan.

We know he likes her. We know he's attracted to her. And we know he doesn't want to get emotionally attached to her. Or hurt her.

So, what happened? What changed? What suddenly turned "we shouldn't" to "ar lath ma, vhenan"?

I think the answer is...

Grief.

Solas has just lost one of his oldest friends. Someone who truly knew and understood him. One of the few connections he had left to the person/spirit he once was.

He is, unequivocally, grief-stricken as a result.

Grief sometimes has a way of encouraging the broken-hearted to seek comfort through sexual connection. The intimacy sex creates with the one you love (or even temporarily with a stranger) can stave off feelings of anxiety and depression. It can feel like truly being seen by another person and being cared for. Loved even.

Solas is already a sad, lonely, angry man to begin with. He tries so hard to keep everyone at arms length. But when Wisdom dies... Is it any wonder he reaches out to Lavellan?

For this reason alone, I can easily imagine Solas' resolve crumbling. His self-restraint dissolving.

I don't think Solas planned on anything happening with the Inquisitor when he asked to have a word with her... I think it just sort of happened.

A true love connection.

[dan-whoell]

i keep thinking about a phandom book club, but i have no idea how to go about organizing it or if anyone would be interested or even where to host it

alternatively is there already a phandom book club i could join? because i would love that

[dreamsteddie]

Wowza. Part one blew up way more than I thought it would so here! Part two! I do have more thoughts about this so there might be a couple more parts to come. We'll see ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

------

Eddie takes half a second to consider just not answering. Maybe throwing his phone away and never going back to the restaurant they went to last night so he never has to confront whatever it is that's about to happen. Maybe even fleeing the country and living alone on a sheep farm with no friends and go relationships ever again so something like this never happens again.

But then he thinks of Steve. Kind, funny Steve with the bright eyes and soft skin who looked at Eddie like he could fall in love with him and he knows that whatever comes next, Steve deserves for Eddie to see it through with him.

New Message: Steve H.

Hey

Just that one word sends Eddie's heart into his throat. He can see that Steve is still typing, those little ellipses of doom popping on and off the screen. Realistically, Steve probably doesn't know what happened, right? Eddie's pretty sure Steve wasn't in on it and it's been less than an hour since Eddie himself found out, so probably not.

Steve H: Gareth called me

Fuck.

Fuck Fuck Fuck Fuck Fuck.

If Eddie's heart was in his throat at the first text, the second one has it dropping through his body and out of his goddamned ass. It's not that he doesn't want Steve to know. He was always planning to tell him, he was just hoping he could be the one to do it. Gareth being a little shit and calling Steve first was not part of the plan.

Steve H: He told be about the prank. I'm sorry if I wasn't what you expected and you were just being nice. We can pretend it never happened. No hard feelings.

Eddie slams his head into his pillow. This is such a cluster fuck he can hardly bring himself to look at the text but he needs to come up with some kind of response, like, yesterday if he wants any chance of keeping the man of his dreams from running for the hills because apparently, Eddie's friends are trying to destroy his life. He takes a deep breath and starts typing.

Eddie: Hey, I'm so sorry about that. I just found out about what they did an hour ago at practice. I didn't think they would just call you out of the blue like that, I was just about to text you.

Not completely true, but Eddie was going to text him about it, just after screaming into his pillow and making a couple Vudu dolls first.

Eddie: For what it's worth I really do like you and I would love to still take you out on that second date, but I understand if my friends scared you off and you want nothing to do with me. I know it's fucked up.

It takes a minute for Steve to respond, the typing bubbles ebbing and flowing as Steve types and retypes whatever it is he wants to say. Eddie is about ready to call it a wash and start googling sheep farms for sale in Ireland when a new text comes in, dispelling all thoughts of learning to sheer wool.

Steve H: Are you sure?

And fuck if that doesn't hurt his heart. Eddie has spent all of two and a half hours with Steve, he's a virtual stranger, but Eddie can swear he can feel all of Steve's secondhand insecurity through that one lonely sentence. Before he even registers what he's asking, he send a quick reply.

Eddie: Can I Facetime you?

Before Eddie can try to rethink his decision, his screen lights up with a notification. Steve is calling him.

Eddie scrambles to answer, fumbling his phone a little in his haste and almost missing the call completely. He manages to get it on the last ring, breathing heavily in a way he knows can't be flattering.

All thoughts about his lack of dexterity fly out the window when he looks into his screen. On their date, Steve was perfectly put together. Hair meticulously done, clothes freshly pressed, and a light sheen of lipgloss accentuating the perfect curve of his mouth. While Steve is still beautiful through the lens of his camera, it's clear that he's been crying. His eyes are red and a little puffy, hair out of order in a way Eddie thinks is probably unusual for him, and Eddie can see that he's wearing a well-loved beige hoodie.

"Hi," Steve says, waving a shy hand almost the same way he had last night.

"Hey sweetheart," Eddie says, keeping his voice low and gentle, desperate to soothe Steve however he can through the distance of their phones.

For a minute they just look at each other, neither one knowing what to say in a situation like this. Eddie sees Steve gearing up to say something, but he cuts in before he starts. There's something he needs to say while Steve can see him face to face.

"I'm really sorry about what happened!" He says, much lounder than he intended. "My friends were being dicks. I haven't dated in a while and instead of being normal fucking people they set up this whole stupid prank but I swear I wasn't in on it!"

Something about what he says draws a small smile from the corner of Steve's mouth, so Eddie keeps talking. "Besides, if they wanted to prank me they should have picked someone that isn't a literal fucking model in disguise. There wasn't a chance in hell I wasn't going to beg you for that second date."

At that, Steve gives a little chuckle and it lifts Eddie's heart from where it'd fallen onto the floor and puts in back in his chest 10 times lighter than before.

"Jesus, are you always such a flirt Munson?" he says.

"Only when the boys are especially pretty," Eddie responds.

Steve gives another little laugh at that before sobering up. He gives Eddie a long look through the phone, and Eddie lets him.

"Are you sure you don't want to just call it quits here man? Gareth was pretty adamant that I'm not the kind of guy you usually go for. I don't want you to feel like you have to humor me out of kindness." There's a forced flippancy to Steve's words that Eddie knows well from his own Munson Coping Strategies Handbook. Steve is trying to give him an out, but Eddie can tell that he doesn't want to.

For the first time since this all started, Eddie is well and truly mad. Gareth and Jeff had absolutely no business poking around in his love life in the first place, but now they've reached out to the guy Eddie already told them he liked to what? Tell him never mind actually, we don't think you're the right guy for our friend even though he told us very explicitly how into you he is.

Eddie lets all the frustration, anger, and tenuous hope building up in his chest fuel his reply. This one has to count, he can feel it. It's a charisma saving throw with the whole campaign on the line. He can't miss this one.

"Honestly Steve, if you asked me two days ago what I was looking for in a partner, I probably would have said I wanted to date another alternative metalhead or punk who likes playing DnD and getting high on the weekend." Eddie can see Steve's shoulders slump as his eyes dart away, but he pushes on, determined to make his point.

"But, I haven't had as good a time as we had last night in a really long time." Steve looks back up, eyes alight with the same tentative hope Eddie himself is channeling. "I think you're funny and interesting, and you have the absolute worst takes on ice cream flavors, and you're hot as hell. Like, seriously the hottest guy I've ever seen in real life."

Steve smiles, the edges of his eyes crinkling.

Critical success.

"So, about that second date."

-------

Tag List

@wheneverfeasible @the-dark-hearts @sofadofax @wrenisfangirling @whatfinestandsfor @lilpomelito @raisedbylibrarians @ollyxar @mugloversonly @xxbottlecapx @hezaaxdexangelous @kimsnooks @that-one-gay-crow

[cinnamorollcrybaby]

begging on my knees, ripping my skin off for shiu kong ANYTHING <3 ily cinna LMAOO

Bullet for my Assassin

Tags: Shiu x fem!Reader, Toji x fem!Reader, mfm, why choose, kidnapping, murder, dead dove, dark romance plot, you're being used for ransom, Toji and Shiu are morally black in this one.

Synopsis: Your dad is a wealthy CEO of Japan, but he hates you because you were born a girl instead of a boy. Toji and Shiu kidnap you and hold you ransom for money. Things ensue???

An: Hiiiii nepo baby, i know you said shiu kong anything. I hope you don’t mind Toji making an appearance. Also, HAPPY (so very late; i'm so sorry.) BIRTHDAY!!! Look, i gotta be honest. I ran out of inspiration for this fic, so I'm posting it, hoping it will revitalize some of that inspiration for a part two. That being said, let me know if I should make a part two.

Being the daughter of one of the wealthiest men in Japan was actually a death sentence. Since you didn’t have a dick between your legs, you’re obviously less than in the world of business.

Your dad pressured your mom into giving him children to inherit the company, but he didn’t want children. He wanted men to inherit the company. You were just a lowly girl!! How were you supposed to manage a company? Girls clearly didn’t know anything about finance or business. (can you smell my sarcasm)

Ruthless and cold, your father never showed you nor your mother an ounce of love. In fact, he had tried multiple avenues to try and prove that you weren’t his kid. Unfortunately for both of you, you share 23 of your dad’s chromosomes.

His anger was growing worse towards you as you got older and developed your own personality. Everything you did was wrong in his eyes. Even though the company was specifically suppose to go to his kid, your father had been toying with the idea of selling out just so you couldn’t ruin what he had built.

Not that you cared, you thought about how if you were the CEO, you’d burn the company to the ground just to spite his wishes. You’d love to see him turn over in his grave as he watched his baby burn because of his daughter.

You basically lived alone. Your mother had passed a couple of years ago due to strange circumstances, and your father never bothered to come home. There would be no point to socializing with the likes of you.

Your mother’s early death rocked you to your core. For your entire childhood, she was weary and exhausted. Your father directed his anger on her, and she couldn’t help but subconsciously put the blame on you. If only you were a boy.

She did a good job of not showing her true thoughts. She wasn’t a doting or nurturing, but she was there for you. She never raised a hand to you, never raised her voice with you, never called you mean names. That was all you could ask for whenever your dad was so vile towards you. While she wasn’t close with you, she was still your mom, and she was the closest thing to parental guidance that you had. Her death was the beginning of your lonely existence.

The mansion was like a prison for you. Since your dad was so prominent in social media, you had an image to uphold, and he didn’t want you ruining that image. So, he didn’t even give you the chance to interact with anyone outside of the house. The only way for you to escape his claws was to either get married or die, and getting married was impossible when you weren’t allowed to interact with anyone on the outside.

You preferred being alone. The empty quiet feelings was better than the anxiety you got when your father was home. He’d always start yelling at the waitstaff about something so minuscule. He harbored so much anger that the house practically turned sour when he came home.

What was the saying? If you grow up with an angry man in your house, there will always be an angry man in your house. The thought of marrying someone like your dad made you want to gouge your eyes out with a butter knife. Being alone was the best option.

Besides, the waitstaff was nice. They cared for you… albeit from a distance, but they cared. It was known that you received the worst of your father’s anger, so they empathized with you.

The house was particularly quiet late one evening. It wasn’t the normal quiet that gave you a sense of peace. It was eerily quiet, giving you a sense of dread. The sounds of hushed talking and dishes clattering was the usual background noise in the house from the waitstaff, but there was nothing right now… as if it truly was just you in the house.

The alarms would’ve went off if someone entered. Not to mention there’s security posted around the perimeter… unless your father was the reason that it was so quiet… Surely, it was just him. Maybe he sent the waitstaff home for the day?

You carefully slipped out of bed, pulling a robe on over your silk pajamas. Being a CEO’s daughter wasn’t all bad. You received luxury items in exchange for feeling void of any real human connection and your dad’s hatred!

Briefly taking a moment to wonder if you were being one of those dumb characters from a scary movie, you quickly pushed those thoughts out of your head. Your life was more of a tragedy than a horror movie.

Slowly stepping out of your room, the click of your door latching filled the space, and you held your breath for just a moment. Nothing.

You soundlessly walked down the hall. Since you were on the second floor, there was a landing where you could look over the rails to see the bottom floor.

Nothing. No- is that a foot? Is someone lying on the ground. You leaned farther over the wooden railing to see. You were surely mistaken, right? Who was lying on the floor?

The feeling of a hand pressing down on the back of your head. Fingers entangled with your hair as the unknown man gripped you from behind. His other hand was steady on your hip. You were being dangled over the side of the railing by a stranger.

Immediately, you started to thrash against his hold, panicking as you did so. “Let me go!” You shouted, kicking your feet out from behind you to try to get away from him.

Turning your head as much as his hand would allow, you only caught the glimpse of a scar on the man’s lip. He shot you a grin before pushing your body closer to the edge, almost making you topple right over the railing.

“Yeah, princess? Want me to let you go?” His voice was husky, teasing almost. It had a raspy edge to it that sent shivers up your spine as you were now trying to push back against him to get away from the edge.

Your eyes were looking at the drop, wondering if it was better to just fall than to face whatever this man was going to do you. Somethings were worse than death…

You switched tactics, pulling away from him instead of trying to get away from the rail. You were going to topple right over it. A growl of frustration left his lips as he easily yanked you away from the railing. Your body collided with his brick wall of a warm chest.

Taking a chance to look up at him, you immediately regretted it. The perpetrator had black hair that came over his forehead and pretty green eyes that you could get lost in. His lips seemed to permanently house a cocky smirk, and fuck, he was built.

“You must have a death wish, brat.” He scowled at you as if he wasn’t the one who dangled you so close to the edge.

Not bothering to answer his taunts, you quickly started to fight against him, beating against his chest with your hands, trying to wriggle from his grasp. He was massive. You were sure that none of your blows were doing anything to him.

Without any difficulty, the hulk-sized man slung you over his shoulder, securing an arm around your frame. He didn’t even flinch or bat an eye each time you hit him. Your fists did little to his toned back.

Not able to fight your way out, you use your next best defense tool: your voice. “Let me go!” You shrieked as loud as possible. “Let me go! Somebody help!” Tears coated your eyes, and your voice went hoarse from yelling.

“Let me goo~ Somebody help mee~” The man mocked you in an obscene high-pitched tone with a laugh. He had done his homework. Even if you screamed, no one would be coming to save you right now.

Every staff member in the house was deceased, and thank god your dear old dad is so paranoid that he put his mansion in the literal middle of nowhere. There were no neighbors that’d hear you either.

You were completely and utterly alone with the man who was kidnapping you. A deep sense of dread and hopelessness filled your stomach, and you continued to cry — weakly begging for anyone to help you.

The man toned you out rather easily as he carried you down the massive flight of stairs. He used his free hand to flip open a burner phone, and he dialed a number before talking.

“The security system is still down?” His gruff, no-nonsense voice returned to him as if he wasn’t just making fun of you moments prior.

Even though you knew it was likely one of his associates on the phone, you screamed for help. Hot tears coated your cheeks as your voice strained.

A firm smack to your ass jolted you, and your voice caught in your throat. Did your kidnapper really just spank you for misbehaving?

“The girl isn’t hurt. She’s just being dramatic. I’m heading to the pickup spot.” He didn’t let the person on the other side answer before he clopped the flip phone shut, effectively ending the call.

“Gonna get me in trouble acting like that, girl.” The man tsked his tongue, and he continued to effortlessly carry you around to the back entrance of the house.

You finally caught a glimpse of your poor staff members. Your heart lurched in your chest. They had families and lives. Now, they were dead on your floor because of this man.

The man didn’t say another word as you cried. He kept his one arm firmly wrapped around you as he so casually carried you out of the house. The security system and the guards had already been dealt with.

Soon, you unceremoniously shoved into the back of a black tinted car. You struggled as much as you could, kicking and scratching. You even tried to bite the man as he tied your arms behind your back.

“Keep fighting. I’ll hogtie and gag your ass.” He threatened lowly, becoming sick of this game with you. He never quite understood why people fought so hard against him when he clearly held the upper hand. It was useless.

Letting out a small sob, you laid against the backseat of the car. The leather interior felt cold and ruthless as your tears fell from your eyes.

“Come on, Toji. We don’t have all day.” The driver reprimanded as if the man was simply buckling in a toddler and not kidnapping a grown woman.

You flinched from the sound of the driver’s voice. You had been so focused on fighting against the Toji guy that you didn’t even realize there was another man idly sitting in the front seat, puffing on a cigar.

Toji tied your ankles together, but he didn’t hogtie you thankfully. Without saying another word, he slammed the door shut before getting into the passenger side seat.

You felt your heart drop as the car started to move. You had an inkling… you’d never see that mansion again. You just knew it. Even though you hated the very frame that house sat on, you longed for the empty feeling of sitting inside. You’d take the void of living in a loveless home over being taken by two men.

Your stomach churned, and suddenly, you felt ill as you faced the grave circumstances. Bile raised in your throat, and your hands struggled against the ropes that Toji had bound you with. Panic set in. You were going to choke on your vomit while you laid face down in it.

“There she goes.” Toji muttered, tone laced with annoyance before he reached back and pulled your arm so your mouth was hanging over the back seat. You threw up safely into the floor.

“I just got this car detailed.” The driver groaned as he took another puff from his cigar.

“It happens every time without fail. Ya should start puttin’ puppy pads back there or something.” Toji responded as his arm was still reached back, bracing your body.

“Yeah, because that’s not suspicious at all.” The driver responded with a sarcastic tone. It was clear that this wasn’t their first encounter with kidnapping someone. You didn’t even want to think about the implications of that.

Your adrenaline was dropping off, and while you knew you should try and stay awake — try to map out the turns the car made, you were exhausted after emptying your stomach contents into the floor.

Your head rested against the cool leather seats, and a moment later, you were out.

“It’s like fuckin’ clockwork.” Toji commented as he saw you dozing off in the backseat.

“Let me hogtie you and throw you into the back of a car, and we’ll see if you don’t throw up and pass out.” The driver grinned over at him.

“Kinky.” Was all the man responded with.

*** *** ***

The next time you awoke you were bound to a chair in a surprisingly well-lit room. It appeared to be a bedroom. Judging by the overly bland decor, you assumed this was an Airbnb or a hotel. There was no way they could’ve hauled your sleeping body into a hotel without being noticed, so it was definitely an Airbnb. Taking in your surroundings, you flinched as you finally caught a glimpse of the two men standing in your peripheral. They were silently watching you.

“So nice of you to join us, sleeping beauty.” Toji mocked with an easy grin, the scar on his lip flexing upwards. If he wasn’t your kidnapper, you would’ve classified him to be rather handsome in a very rugged sense. He just looked like the type of man who could get the job done.

“I thought we accidentally killed ya.” The driver who was now not driving remarked.

You had to be smarter with your words this time. There was no point in begging to be set free. They had already taken you to god knows where, killed your entire staff, and bound you to a chair. There was no going back for them.

“My dad has money. That’s what you’re after, right?” You bargained, taking a stab in the dark. This didn’t feel like human trafficking. This felt like a hostage, ransom situation. Little did they know, your dad probably wasn’t going to pay a single penny to get you back.

“Clever girl.” The driver grinned. He was also another handsome man with chestnut brown hair and a mustache. He seemed much more calmer than Toji, and he had a capable energy to him. You could tell that he was definitely the ringleader. Toji was simply the muscle behind the operation.

The driver took three slow, calculated steps towards you. He was still out of reach as he crouched down to be at your level. His eyes were dark brown as he carefully exam you.

“If you’re good, I’ll explain how this is gonna work.” The man said lowly. His voice was deeper than Toji’s but not as gravely or hardened. He had a voice fit for radio.

You slowly nodded, tears already sliding down your cheeks out of sheer fear.

“Good girl. Keep that same energy for the camera.” The man purred before you directed your attention to Toji. He was setting up a tripod with a nice Canon camera set up on it. He flicked the lights off, but it wouldn’t be too dark for anyone to see.

Your body started to react before you could even fully process what was going on. You rocked back and forth in your chair while crying, trying to fight against the restraints. Toji clicked the record button, and he pulled two black balaclavas out of his pocket. Throwing one at the other man and slipping one on for himself. Their identities besides their eyes were completely concealed.

The nameless man tied a piece of cloth that worked as a gag around your mouth, and you sobbed harder. This could go so many ways, and you didn’t want to consider all the possibilities. Your mind thinking up the most depraved acts.

Then, the nameless man held a voice distorter up to his mouth, like the ones that were used in horror films. Toji suddenly grabbed your hair tightly with his oversized fist, and he made you look directly into the camera.

The nameless man started the video off by addressing your dad by his full name. “We have your daughter.” He plainly stated, going silent so one of your muffled sobs could clearly he heard.

He went on a spill about the ransom and how it was going to work. They were demanding 10 million dollars to be paid in a week. It had to be paid in person by your dad, or they would mail him your body parts.

You choked out sobs and tried to scream. You were going to die. There was no way you were going to make it out of this situation alive.

Toji’s thumb ever so gently caressed the back of your head. He was still holding your hair tightly, making you look directly into the camera, but he was subtly rubbing small circled into your scalp as if he was trying to subtly soothe you.

Whatever his intent was, it wasn’t working. You strained against the rope and the gag. You cried and tried to beg your way out of this. Finally, the nameless man showed the camera a timer. It was set for 168 hours, and it was steadily dwindling down.

Then, he stopped the recording ominously. “Can’t believe we got that on the first try.” He muttered with a laugh before pulling off his balaclava. He then flicked back on the lights.

You looked at both of the men in a confused manner. They were both so calm and casual after recording a literal ransom video. It was eerie. You hated this feeling of distrust and uneasiness that settled into the pit of your stomach.

Toji ripped off his balaclava, and he promptly untied the gag before picking up the camera off the tripod and walking away.

“Alright doll, you did so good.” The nameless man praised as he crouched back down to be at your level. “I guess that means I gotta tell you how things are gonna work now, huh?”

A sheepish nod later, and he continues, "I'm Shiu, and you already know the other old fucker's name is Toji." He starts, gesturing to Toji who was lazily typing away at a computer with a death glare.

"We're not gonna hurt ya until you give us a reason to. You just gotta be good for us and do as we say, and this will be a breeze." Shiu's tone was steady and lighthearted as if he was talking about the itinerary to a vacation and not your kidnapping.

Tears clouded your vision. Your captors seemed to have thought of all the details but one. Your father couldn't give less of a fuck about you, and he likely wasn't going to pay a dime for your safe return.

"And when my dad doesn't pay you two, then what? You two kill me and mail my body off so you can move onto the next mogul's daughter?" You asked -- tone full of resentment.

"We're not amateurs, darlin'." Shiu grins at you, boldly using his thumb to wipe away a few stray tears from your cheeks. You're still bound, so you're at his whim right now. "Toji's workin' on releasing that video publicly. How could the wealthiest CEO of Japan get away with not paying to have his daughter back safely?"

You pursed your lips together, trying to think rationally. None of this felt real. Your heart stuttered in your chest. Would your dad pay to get you back if he risked ruining his reputation?

If he ruined his reputation, companies would pull their stocks and tank his company. It would be hard for him to form partnerships because other companies wouldn’t want to be associated with him. His perfectly curated baby would come crashing down.

He would have to pay to get you back.

Noticing the gears turning in your head, Shiu patted your hair gently with his oversized palm. “We also got a few other tricks up our sleeve. We didn’t do this on a spur of the moment decision, darling.”

They weren’t two petty criminals looking to make it big. These two men were the real deal. They had the knowledge and precision that it took to commit serious crimes. This probably wasn’t even their first ransom situation.

“Glad to know you plotted my kidnapping perfectly.” You muttered in a self-deprecating tone.

Shiu gave another chuckle as his hand stayed on your head. His touch was warm and unwavering. It had been years since someone showed you affection so casually.

“I’d say you’re in good hands, but…” He grinned at you, ruffling your hair before removing his hand. “You’re in capable hands.” He said before he slowly walked around behind you. “Be honest, darling. If I untie you, are you going to try to run?”

Your eyes lingered on the door of the Airbnb. Would you even make it far if you did run? Would it be worth being tied down for even longer? Your eyes wandered to Toji, who was sat strategically near the door. His gaze was still on the laptop, but you could tell that he could easily catch you if given the chance.

Shiu laughed as he could see the inner turmoil on your face. You really wore your emotions on your sleeve, not hiding that you were weighing the option of running. “You wanna see what’ll happen? Try it, princess.” He dared as his fingers worked to loosen the knots around your hands.

Your body was achy from the precarious position of being tied to the chair. You instinctively stretched, feeling your stiff muscles protest.

You looked back up at Shiu, registering that he was offering you to run. “Go ahead. Go.” He said as he nodded towards the door.

“If you make me run, I’m taking it out on your ass.” Toji grumbled from his position near the door. His green eyes were now glaring at you.

Against your better judgement, you ran. You had to run, even if it was clearly a setup. If you didn't try to get away, then someone would say that you wanted this to happen. You wanted to be kidnapped from your prison.

You barely made it to the door and swung it open before two strong arms wrapped around your midsection, hauling you up as if you weighed nothing.

"Fucking brat." Toji's voice rumbled in your ear as he lifted your body up, pressing your backside against his chest as he kicked the door shut.

Shiu chuckled as he made sure to lock it back. He really just enticed you to run to piss Toji off. He had to keep things interesting after all.

A grunt passed your lips as you were unceremoniously slung onto the plush bed in the room. You tried to kick and fight your way out of Toji's hold, but his hands expertly held you down and forced your arms above your head. You squeezed your eyes shut.

Here it comes... the part where you wish they would've just killed you...

The sound of metal jingling caught your attention, and you hesitantly opened your eyes to see Toji handcuffing you down to the headboard.

As soon as one of your wrists were cuffed and bound, Toji got up off of you. "Until you can learn how to behave and not be stupid." He muttered as he turned his back to you and went back to sit down.

Well, that wasn't what you were expecting.

"Technically-" You spoke up, looking between Toji and Shiu as they watched you with amused eyes. "I was behaving since he told me to run." You pointed out, nodding your head towards Shiu.

"And I told you what would happen if you did run. You're lucky I haven't bent you over my knee yet." Toji countered, crossing his arms over his chest with a lopsided grin.

"Yet-?"

"I haven't decided if I'm going to do it or not, but your smart mouth is pushing me, brat."

You swallow thickly, realizing what you were truly dealing with here. Your eyes leave Toji's figure, and you look up towards the handcuff chaining you to the bed.

You were kidnapped from one prison and brought to another, and yet, a strange voice in the back of your head is telling you that your kidnappers have better intentions with you than your own dad.

"Don't listen to him," Shiu's low voice rumbled, breaking your line of thought. "He's all bark and rarely any bite,"

"He killed all of my staff members," you retort, staring at Shiu with furrowed eyebrows. How could he act like Toji was anything less than a killing machine?

"Touché," was all Shiu responded with as he looked over at you with a relaxed grin.

Toji was back to lounging as he tilted his head back. His adams apple bobbing as he closed his eyes. He wasn't really going to sleep next to the door, was he?

Shiu had walked off out of sight, and you could hear him responding to a phone call.

Moving around on the bed, you figured you may as well get comfortable while you're trapped.

[steddieas-shegoes]

i don’t know why i can’t take my eyes off of you

for @steddielovemonth day one using You and Me by Lifehouse

rated t | 1186 words | no cw | tags: future fic, second chances, mutual pining, idiots in love, songwriter Eddie, teacher Steve

🛒🛒🛒🛒🛒🛒🛒🛒

Steve’s walking down the frozen section of Melvald’s when time stops.

Not literally. The watch on his wrist is still ticking. The clock on the wall at the front of the store is still moving. People around him are still grabbing their groceries.

But Eddie Munson is standing in front of the ice cream section like he belongs there.

Eddie left Hawkins five years ago.

He kissed Steve on the lips, then the forehead, and left.

Steve’s thought about it, about him, every day since.

Eddie hasn’t noticed him yet. Maybe Steve should leave before he does. Last he’d heard, Eddie was working at a recording studio as a songwriter, halfway making his dreams come true.

He’s happy, or at least that’s what all the kids have said when he’s brought up. They don’t know about the kiss, at least Steve doesn’t think they do. He’s never told them.

It’s busy enough in the store that Steve’s pretty sure he can sneak away before Eddie sees him. He starts to back away, but immediately bumps into an old woman.

“I’m so sorry, are you okay?” He’s asking, and she’s brushing him off and saying she’s fine. He feels terrible.

“Steve?” Eddie’s voice is like music, always has been a melody made specifically for Steve.

“Eddie,” Steve says as the old woman walks away. “Hey.”

Steve forgets he’s in public as the world around him fades and all he sees, smells, wants, is Eddie.

“I didn’t know you were still in Hawkins,” Eddie says quietly, leaning forward on his toes. He’s got a new battle vest, though it looks well-worn. Steve wonders if he knows that his old vest is hanging in his closet, if he knows that Steve pulls it out every once in a while so he can put it on and feel a little less alone.

“Yeah. Never left.” It sounds worse than it is. Steve always said he’d leave when all the kids left, but once they did, he didn’t know where to go. It’s not like he could follow them around, couch-surfing across the country a month or two at a time, burdening them with his self-imposed loneliness.

“You look good,” Eddie says, changing the subject.

Leaving Hawkins was a touchy subject for Steve the last time he’d seen Eddie. It still is. Eddie must sense that.

“So do you,” Steve breathes out. He does. He looks healthy and happy, something Hawkins had completely drained from him before. “What are you doing back?”

“Just visiting Wayne. Usually he comes to see me, but he insisted he didn’t wanna deal with the ‘big city’ this time. And I’m the best nephew, so I said ‘sure, old man, I’ll go back to the town that hates my guts!’ And here I am trying to find my favorite ice cream at the store. They don’t have it,” Eddie shrugs. He rambles when he’s nervous, still. “He hasn’t mentioned seeing you around or anything, though.”

“Yeah, I guess we don’t cross paths much,” Steve laughs awkwardly. He can’t remember the last time he saw Wayne. Must’ve been around Christmas, when Steve was helping Joyce with her decorations while Hopper worked overtime and Wayne stopped by to drop off some lights. “How’s he doing?”

“He’s good. Stubborn as hell. Won’t retire even though he could,” Eddie shakes his head. “Think he’s scared of being bored.”

“Or lonely.”

The words escape Steve before he can hold them back.

Eddie’s face softens, but it’s not full of pity. Everyone always gives Steve this look, like they know he’s putting on a brave face. Not Eddie.

“Wayne’s always been content alone. He’s got friends, and he calls me when he has something new to argue about,” Eddie leans in closer. “I don’t really worry about Wayne. Other people, sure.”

“Like who?” Steve swallows.

“You settle down yet?” Eddie asks in response.

Steve’s so shocked by the question, he doesn’t answer.

“I figured the kids were just being nice by not telling me if you did, but you’re not wearing a ring and you’re grocery shopping alone, so…” Eddie rambles again. Steve feels his heart flutter in his chest.

“No.”

“No?”

“No.”

“Are you dating someone?”

Steve shakes his head. “Haven’t really found anyone interesting.”

“Interesting? Since when does Steve Harrington want someone interesting?”

Since the most interesting person he knows kissed him and then left. Since everyone else is boring in comparison to you. Since he realized he was dumb to let you go.

“I guess what I thought I wanted is different now. Has been for a while,” Steve shrugs.

It’s strange how easily Steve becomes wrapped up in Eddie’s orbit, how quickly everything else didn’t matter the moment Eddie started talking to him. It’s just the two of them.

“Excuse me,” a man says to their left. Steve jumps back and apologizes for blocking where he needed to be. Eddie’s eyes never leave Steve.

When the man walks away, Steve clears his throat.

“How long are you in town?”

“How long will it take me to convince you to come back with me?”

Steve chokes on his next breath. “What? Come back with you? To…”

“New York or Chicago. I’m getting a promotion and they’ll let me pick where I wanna go. I’ve been leaning towards Chicago because more of the music I enjoy is making a mark there,” Eddie explains. “And there’s plenty of options for you there, too. Dustin said you just finished your teaching degree.”

“Dustin talks about me?”

“Only when unprovoked,” Eddie grins. “Have you been waiting for me?”

It’s blunt, but Eddie always has been. Steve can hide a lot of emotions from people; It’s been a survival tactic for most of his life.

He’s never been able to hide shit from Eddie.

“Not on purpose.”

Eddie looks at his basket of items. He was really only here for a few things, but he saw his favorite cookies were on sale and he couldn’t resist stocking up. He looks between the basket and Eddie’s eyes.

“You wanna come to mine for dinner?”

“Is dinner cookies?” Eddie laughs, poking at the package closest to the top.

“That’s dessert,” Steve laughs, too. He finds it easy. He never thought it could be this easy after the time that’s passed, the distance they had between them.

“First dessert.”

“What are we, hobbits?” Steve asks.

Eddie’s jaw drops open. “Steve, please. Not in public.”

“What?”

“I didn’t know you read it!” Eddie groans, but he’s smiling, so Steve’s not actually worried.

“I’ve read a lot of things! I’ve been waiting for you, remember?”

An announcement starts in the store— someone’s car is blocking a delivery truck entrance— and they both take a step away from each other. They were much closer than they should be in the grocery store.

This is still Hawkins, and people already don’t like Eddie. Looking cozier than two dudes normally would might be dangerous for both of them.

“So. Dinner?” Steve asks again. It’s easier to remember there are other people around with some distance between them.

“Sure. Dinner.”

Time starts again.

[hannieehaee]

LO$ER=LO♡ER (teaser)

18+ / mdi

summary: jihoon's been pushed aside and ostracized from the moment he was born. completely alone, with no family and only a handful of friends, he's been too beaten down to expect anything good with the shitty cards life has dealt him. when he's presented with his new coworker, it's hard to not fantasize about her, but he'll never actually allow himself to believe she could ever look like him with anything but pity — just like everyone else.

content: loser!jihoon, antisocial!jihoon, sociallyawkward!jihoon, insecure!jihoon, sunshine!reader, jihoon is basically just a complete loser with horrible luck who's never felt true happiness (sorry), mentions of bullying, mentions of jihoon's sad past, sunshine!reader, slowburn, lots of worldbuilding but its just so u can feel sorry for jihoon lol, coworkers au, pining, miscommunication, afab reader, smut, sub!jihoon, virgin!jihoon, handjob, body worship, nipple play, dry humping, penetrative sex, etc.

(^ no actual content warnings in the teaser)

wc: 1.9k (teaser); 14k (full fic)

RELEASE DATE: february 10th!

or you can check it out on my patreon today by subscribing!

a/n: i put together every form of loserism and created this jihoon

masterlist

Every week was the same.

Jihoon would get up, fix his overgrown hair the best he could, and take the train over to work.

This was as far as he'd gotten in life; an overly repetitive existence with no sense of joy within it.

He should've been happy. Things were better now. Being 27 with a stable job and no real issues in his life should be something to be grateful for, yet Jihoon found himself being completely displeased with his life.

Surely there must be more to life than this, right? A lonely and loveless life that appeared to be leading him nowhere. But still, things were better than before.

It was hard for Jihoon to speak of his childhood, much less his teenage years (or even his college life). It was all too grim. He'd grown to accept it, to let it all go, but the past had made him who he was, and he knew his current self was to blame for his loneliness. For his lack of love.

And so he continued his daily routine, living day after day with no change in sight. He accepted this with a flat smile, grateful that things were just fine. Not good, not great, not even varied, but just fine.

This week, though, finally had something different. But to Jihoon that was usually bad news.

Were you bad news?

You were the brand new thing in his life.

It was your first week in his office. A brand new face. A very pretty face.

Jihoon never thought about such things. He'd never had any romantic experience in his life. He had a long distance girlfriend once, but even that didn't work out. Too much distance, too many lies, too many complications. Jihoon just wasn't made for love.

So he never thought of such things again.

It was rare for him to even see a pretty girl on his day to day. His morning commute was far too early and filled with people way too old for him to even look in the eye without feeling disrespectful. His workplace, although consisted of a variety of people, was not a place where he felt very welcome initiating friendships or anything of the sort. Cliques had ended in high school, he thought, yet he found himself at the bottom of the food chain among his coworkers. He wasn't liked and was deliberately avoided by everyone around him.

Until you came along.

Finding you beautiful was no surprise to Jihoon. It was the most obvious thing in the world. Putting appearances aside, you were sunshine personified. Smart, confident, hardworking, gentle, nice, beautiful. You were everything anyone could ever want. At times Jihoon even wondered whether he wanted you or if he just wanted to be like you.

You'd caused an immense impression in him within the short time in which he'd known you.

He hadn't really gotten to know you on a personal level yet. But you had extended him an olive branch upon the first meeting, which was a memory that had implanted itself on his mind. It was rare for Jihoon to come by good memories.

This was the first time he'd felt accepted in a very long time. Yet the fears of it turning around and slapping him in the face (like in so many prior instances) was too big for him to really consider you good news in his life.

It was kind of embarrassing looking back at it. Jihoon hadn't been expecting you (how could he have?), but you suddenly showed up at his cubicle accompanied by one of his coworkers, Doyle.

Doyle wasn't someone Jihoon thought too much about — or at least he tried not to. He was the classic high school bully, except in a corporate-world wrapping. Jihoon had dealt with bullies his whole life, he'd become desensitized to it by now. Still, it bothered him to see him standing next to you. He hadn't met you yet, but he was immediately disheartened by the new girl at the office looking buddy-buddy with someone he considered an adversary.

What had been surprising to Jihoon, though, was your complete disinterest in Doyle's obvious advances.

It was pretty often that Doyle would attempt to assert his dominance by putting Jihoon down in front of other coworkers. He'd tease him and patronize him in front of anyone to see in order to show others who was in charge. And it was not Jihoon, that was for damn sure.

Jihoon got up as soon as he sensed a presence at his cubicle, somehow managing to stumble over his feet as he did so. When he looked up, he was not expecting you, yet there you were. Beautiful, smiling down at him with genuine interest in your eyes. You didn't know him, but you had kindness in your eyes. He could tell.

He stumbled over an introduction as Doyle interrupted him, telling you Jihoon's name and position at the company for him. Unwarranted and once again showing that if he so wished, he could speak over Jihoon.

But you'd interrupted him in return, turning to Jihoon to extend your hand with that smile never leaving your lips.

"Hi, it's really nice to meet you," you'd smiled as he felt fire at the mere handshake.

"Hi, I, uhm, I'm Jihoon. Lee Jihoon. I didn't realize we had someone new coming. It's nice to meet you. You- If you need anything, you can always ask me," he slapped himself mentally when he said it. He stuttered his way through it like a fucking loser. His immediate attraction to you was too obvious. Doyle's smirk as he stood beside you told him all he needed to know.

"Oh, that's so nice, thank you! I'm right next door. Well- right next cubicle, so I'll probably take you up on that sooner or later," you laughed at your own attempt of a joke.

Jihoon couldn't help chuckling back, ignoring Doyle as he patted your shoulder, laughing along. Jihoon noticed a short-lived discomfort in your eyes at the action, one which died when your eyes went back to him.

Was he imagining it, or were you showing preference towards Jihoon?

"Well, let's not bother our little Jihoonie here any longer," Doyle interrupted once more, "It's almost lunch time," he leaned in to tell you, looking down at Jihoon, "We all usually go to a burger joint nearby — Jihoonie here likes to stay in, so we try to stay out of his way."

That wasn't entirely true.

Once upon a time, Jihoon did attempt to join the rest of his coworkers in outings, but he was always alienated. After a few too many slights about his hair, his height, his weird choice in clothing, or even just his personality, he decided to stray away from anything that wasn't strictly professional when it came to his coworkers. He was always the butt of the joke, so he made the decision to isolate in the office with a cold sandwich he packed for himself every day.

Sometimes his friends Soonyoung and Mingyu from accounting would join him, but there was usually not enough time to see them during regular working hours. This left him alone most of the time.

Your face seemed to deflate at Doyle's words. Whether it was out of pity for Jihoon or annoyance at Doyle's overzealous confidence around you, he wasn't sure.

"Oh, I actually brought a packed lunch," you told Doyle before turning to face Jihoon again, "Would it be okay if I stay in with you?", you looked at him with expectant eyes.

"You wanna, uhm, have lunch with me?", he asked dumbly and you nodded, "Y-yeah, that'd be nice, yes," he attempted a shy smile, succeeding when you returned it.

Doyle cleared his throat, interrupting the silent smiles you and Jihoon were sharing.

"Well, I could stay in with you if you want, I-"

But you interrupted him again.

"That's fine. I don't wanna get in the way of your plans. Jihoon will make fine company," you said politely, stepping away from Doyle to head over to your desk, popping back next to Jihoon with a brown paper bag.

Doyle looked dumbfounded for a few moments before masking it with a tight smile. Jihoon simply stood there as you pulled up a chair and settled it on Jihoon's desk, paying no mind to Doyle.

"I guess I'll leave you two to it. I'll keep showing you around after lunch. You have my number if you need anything," Doyle made emphasis on that last statement, offering you what looked like a genuine smile before giving Jihoon a look that told him he still felt victorious in the end.

"Thanks, Doyle! Bye!," you smiled back before turning to Jihoon.

Lunch was incredibly awkward for Jihoon. But that wasn't your fault. You'd been incredibly nice, asking him questions and keeping the conversation going despite the mumbly, shy mess Jihoon was. The conversation was entirely carried by you, with you surprisingly taking an interest in him. Every word, every gesture, they all led him to believe you were genuinely nice.

At the same time, he felt entirely delusional.

It wasn't often that people were nice to him, so it was likely he was building it up to be more than it actually was. You likely did not want to stay in with him, but after Doyle brought up that Jihoon was the only one in the office during lunch break, you had no option but to join him since you also planned to stay in. However, you were a good team player, Jihoon believed. Not many people would sacrifice their lunch to stay in with the black sheep of the office just to rid yourself of any possible awkwardness. Jihoon knew damn well many previous coworkers had gone out of their way to avoid him before.

But despite the belief that you simply pitied him, Jihoon missed your time spent together the moment it ended. He felt shy and blushed bright red at every single word uttered from you, but it had been the nicest interaction he'd had in a long time (a long, long time).

That had happened last Wednesday, repeating itself on Thursday, Friday, and then a whole weekend was spent with Jihoon solely thinking about you. Time that he usually spent reading or playing chess online was instead used up to think about you. It was mostly to overthink every tiny interaction and panic over it, but it was was still preoccupied by you.

But he also thought about other things.

How beautiful he found you to be. How nice, funny, hardworking, smart and riveting you were (despite this being an assessment he'd made in less than a week of knowing you). This was Jihoon's first crush in ... he couldn't even remember how long.

And it was terrible.

Every crush he'd ever had had turned out terribly. Harmless elementary school crushes turned into pranks pulled by his classmates in order to embarrass him. Prepubescent middle school crushes became false confessions that led to public embarrassment. Hopeless high school crushes were nothing but a farse that led him into giving up altogether.

Throughout his practically non-existent love life, Jihoon had always been met by nothing but discouragement, sometimes by simple rejection and other times by harassment from people who believed him to be unworthy of being liked. These were memories he did not like to relive, but the resurgence of feelings for someone brought them all back.

And so he was unsure of how to feel. He was unsure of whether to let himself like you or recoil, unwilling to even try.

...

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[the-overanalyst]

ok i gotta talk about how well the empty sekai vocaloids are written to enhance n25's story

empty miku takes a more active role in the main story than any of her alter egos. empty sekai was originally created with both the desire to disappear and the desire to be saved. miku embodies the latter, so she's the one who called kanade and the others to talk mafuyu down. her existence started out monotonous and lonely, but slowly filled up with good things, which mirrors mafuyu's journey.

rin's arrival signals that empty sekai no longer belongs to mafuyu alone. the members of n25 all share the same feelings to an extent. their connection causes the sekai to become less empty bit by bit. but isn't it interesting how that process began thanks to ena, mafuyu's polar opposite who gets along with her the least? ena uses the sekai for its original purpose--to escape from reality when she wants to disappear--so part of it becomes hers.

meiko, obviously, is a direct parallel for mizuki, always keeping her distance. so her time to shine was right along with mizuki's in this most recent arc. as mizuki gets to the point where she's willing to share her secret, meiko gets to the point where she's willing to get involved in the girls' problems. mizuki's first 4* in an ena event came with meiko's first feature in a non-mizuki event. and her character development is actually crazy, from "sometimes talking makes things worse" to being the one who gets mizuki to talk to ena. live laugh love empty meiko.

luka's self-proclaimed role is as the one who will shakes things up and bring change. she's not afraid to break something if it means learning how to put it back together better than before. in fact, she's pretty effective at this, being featured in events that correspond to mafuyu's biggest milestones: smiling for the first time and running away from home. to me, she's most interesting as a foil to meiko: action vs. inaction, reckless vs. careful.

len represents mafuyu's inner child. he was lost in sekai for an unknown amount of time, but when she finds him, she starts to remember what her childhood was really like. she remembers the way her mother guilt-tripped her for getting lost at pxl, that even then there was no warmth in their relationship. now, as her mother becomes set on stopping her from making music, mafuyu feels just as lost and afraid as len does.

and last but not least, kaito. a problematic fave perhaps, but also the true mvp of mafuyu's arc. he is an embodiment of rising stakes, of walls closing in and time running out. his first appearance is in the event where we see mafumom as the villain she is, and where she starts actively interfering with n25. he tells mafuyu the hard truth that she needed to hear: if she stays as she is, her true self will be destroyed. so of course, he terrifies her, but he's the one who gives her the push to save herself

[primalsouls]

cold hands, warm heart

jing yuan x gn! foxian! reader

theme: fluff, little angsty not so much

warning: none

summary: (name) had been feeling kind of down lately. anywhere they go with jing yuan, they heard unkind comments about themself. usually they never bother them, but now they asked themself; did they deserved jing yuan and his love?

notes: been craving more jing yuan lately~! someone please talk to me about him 😫🙏 lol also here's another read for jing yuan ( ´∀`) enjoy, and any feedback, reblogs, and comments are appreciated!

(name) was a quiet, reserved foxian from the xianzhou luofu. they liked being alone. they don't like being around people. people were annoying and dull-witted. they hated crowded areas and loud noises that hurt their fox-like ears. or people with invasive hands grabbing at their tail without permission from the foxian. people were truly troublesome. but (name) never met a more infuriating person in their entire life than the divine foresight of the xianzhou luofu. he was a bother. always following them around. making embarrassing comments about them. dragging them to places where there would be loud crowds, just to wrap an arm around them and pull them closer to his side while letting his hand linger on their waist. jing yuan was someone (name) wished to avoid. yet a little part of them liked the attention. made them feel less… lonely.

the loneliness disappeared whenever jing yuan was around (name). the foxian acted irritated at his presence, refusing to admit they liked his company and their little conversations. refusing to engulf themself further into his warming touches, his gentle caressing on their ears and tail.

it didn't take long for the foxian to learn their true feelings for jing yuan, causing them to grow distant and more mean-spirited towards him. but keen were the eyes of the dozing general. he saw through their little rebellious act, as he liked to call it, and took his time with them until they were comfortable enough to come forth and spill their hidden feelings to him. jing yuan smiled, so dazzling and handsome, eyes closed. listening to his favorite little fox ramble on and on about how annoying he was to them but came to love that annoyance wholeheartedly. he loved the way their cheeks burned as he caressed it with the back of his hand.

from that moment on, jing yuan stuck by their side whenever they were around each other. whether they were walking around aurum alley or resting lazily in the seat of divine foresight, jing yuan's touches would find their way around their body. and he would let out a laugh here and there whenever his beloved gets flustered and embarrassed about the public affections, gentle swatting at his hands but never fully pushing him away.

but not many see it as playful banter. (name) was known to be pissy callous and mean growing up, a way they thought for people to leave them be. they never cared what others think, what they say about the foxian behind their back. but it didn't mean that sometimes (name) didn't feel bad about themself whenever they heard about how unfit they were to be the divine foresight's lover.

“i don't get what he sees in them. they're nothing special.”

“they're so mean to the general! what is he even around someone so rude and nasty?”

“tch. the general deserves to be with someone beautiful and elegant. not this despicable, horrid fox.”

such comments never bother him. until this time.

“they're so clingy to the general. i would be sick of having them around me if they were this clinging and rotten. i wouldn't be surprised if the general just kept them around to relieve some stress.”

(name) liked being alone. and they sometimes wished they were left alone. so they never had to hear such comments like that. they tried not to let it get under their skin. jing yuan wasn't that kind of person. he loved his darling fox, happily showing them off despite getting scolded lovingly. but it was comments like those that was enough to make the foxian question themself.

did they truly deserve jing yuan?

the foxian stared down from the bridge in the central starskiff haven and watched the starskiffs fly in and out below them. maybe jing yuan deserved better than them. someone who wasn't harsh with him and returned his affections without making a fuss over it. (name) sighed, their eyes shifting over to the general, who was speaking with some people from the palace of astrum. his gaze met theirs, startling the foxian as they huffed and quickly looked away, focusing once more on the starskiffs below the bridge.

“feelings hungry?” a deep, husky voice asked behind them. (name) clicked his tongue, tensing a bit when an arm wrapped around their waist. “or are you tired? we can go back home if you wish.” of course, home was the fox's but jing yuan visited so often, it felt like they lived together.

“don't you have work to do?” they asked, relaxing into the embrace jing yuan pulled them in. he shook his head, smiling at them.

“it can wait. right now, my dear fox needs me.” jing yuan pressed a soft kiss on their temple, grinning when he heard (name) stutter out a small complaint about the kiss. his golden eyes glanced over his shoulder when he heard a passing comment about the way his foxian lover reacted to his affections, degrading them at the same time. hearing such a comment, he turned to his fox and wondered if they heard it as well. they wore an irritated look on their face. “let's head home. there isn't much work today, yanqing and fu xuan can take care of the rest.” he added, taking their hand and leading them away from the bridge. (name) didn't say much, following their lover back to the starskiff that would lead the couple back to aurum alley.

(name) wondered why jing yuan was still stuck by their side. and they asked whenever they felt lonely thinking about it. his response always caused him a light smack on the back and a shy kiss on his lips.

“because i love you, of course.” the words tickled their heart warmly. “i cherish and adore you, dearest. i would be a madman if i didn't.” jing yuan continued, earning a scoff of a laugh from the foxian who laid beside him in bed. the general grinned, caressing their cheek lovingly. “why did you ask? are you thinking negatively?” (name) shook their head, an arm wrapped around the general's waist.

“no… i was just curious… i love you, too.” (name) said quietly, their cheeks burning up and darkening. pressing a side of their face against jing yuan's chest, the foxian snuggled closer to their partner. “go to sleep, i know you've been wanting to doze lately.” they said, closing their eyes. jing yuan stared at them, watching for any telltale sign of discomfort or sadness, but none were there. he laughed lightly, settling more comfortably in the bed as he pulled his foxian lover closer.

“sleep well, little fox.” jing yuan muttered against their head, his arms secured around them.

(name) was quiet and liked being alone, but having jing yuan by their side made their life more thrilling. no matter what anyone says about them, jing yuan would be there to erase those inferior thoughts and comments about the foxian who captured his heart. and (name) would do the same, because no one else had expressed such love to them like jing yuan had done and they would make sure to return the mutual feelings of protectiveness tenfold as their heart loved jing yuan.

[myjealouseyes]

Request from an anon: Hello! I would like to request a Harry x Reader who’s from Hufflepuff. She’s very sweet and often finds herself surrounded by many magical creatures (even dangerous ones like dragons, etc..) I want to know how Harry would react and feel by this type of reader.

A/N— sunshine!reader has my heart!! ☺️

Content warnings: none. (Shirtless Harry but it’s not suggestive and it’s not a major point of importance.)

Send a request here.

“Is it true you’re friends with the Giant Squid?”

Harry asks casually, as he juggles all the bundles of yarn you’ve handed him on your quest for the red one you need. You practically stripped him of his Gryffindor sweater when you noticed the hole in it. It was small. He hadn’t even noticed it, and even if he had he would’ve just left it alone or gotten a new sweater. You weren’t having that though, insisting that you’d patch it for him. He asks this question with hopes that the answer will distract him from the fact that his extremely lovely girlfriend who he’s in her dorm with alone, is seeing him Shirtless for the first time.

You don’t seem to be affected by this moment of significance as you continue your search for yarn, only pausing to give him a slight smile and a head tilt. “You mean squidy? ‘Course I am! He saved me from drowning in first year.” And if Harry needed another reason to be head-over-heels, just like that, he had it. Not only were you friends with it, you’d even given it a nickname. Just being around you is enough to make his heart ache with fondness. It’s quite sickening really.

“The Giant Squid saved you?” Despite the underlying wonder in his tone, he believes you a thousand percent. It’s so on-brand for you; having an aura so bright that a squid that seems to torment the rest of the student body somehow likes you enough to save you, and become your friend. “Yep!” You respond enthusiastically. “He’s very lovely, but because of how big he is and his…less than ideal way of trying to make friends, everyone’s always afraid or at least annoyed with him all the time. It’s a very lonely existence.”

Harry has to purse his lips to keep himself to audibly cooing. He’s not sure he’ll meet ever someone else even half as caring as you are. The way you believe every single being, including the ones known for trying to grab people and drag them under, is just worthy of having friends makes him worry you might be a little too sweet for this world. You huff in disappointment as you see that you’ve run completely out red yarn. You hold up a dark pink one instead, closest to red you have. “I guess I forgot to grab some. Would the pink be too noticeable for you?” The slight guilt In your voice and pout on your face makes him want to smother you in a hundred kisses and buy you a new sweater, but he just brings your hand up to his lips for just one on palm instead.

“Pink sounds wonderful.”

[biceratops7]

I’m gonna SCREAM-

We’ve already established as a fandom that Metatron could teach a masterclass on gas lighting, but I wanna talk about how he specifically validates the things Aziraphale cares for while simultaneously devaluing them under the surface.

First off, this moment?

Tells us everything we need to know. It sets the scene for exactly the games Metatron is playing. He makes Muriel feel important while openly insulting them (flat out calling them stupid), aka seamlessly reinforcing the idea that they’re less than to both them and anyone else in the room. He knows he can get away with this easily, he knows that Muriel, lonely, overlooked little Muriel, will be completely distracted by the fact that someone so important is taking an interest in them.

This is already horribly clever, but then later on you realize it’s doing even MORE heavy lifting when he appoints Muriel to run the bookshop. “See? What’s important to you is what’s important to me! I’ve graciously taken the time to ensure your beloved shop is looked after by Muriel. You know, the dim one!” …let’s suffice it to say he’s ensnared too birds with one net for this one, and that a pattern is already starting to arise.

So when Metatron says Gabriel came to Aziraphale because he’s a “natural leader” and “doesn’t just tell people what they wanna hear”? Yah he’s full of shit. Aziraphale struggles with his sense of purpose when he doesn’t have someone or something guiding him, and for thousands of years he’s been terrified of sharing his true feelings and opinions to 90% of people he’s known. Completely just trying to butter him up. Wanna know the real reason Gabriel seeks asylum with Aziraphale?

Exactly this. Gabriel just says so point blank. It’s not because Aziraphale is this person for him, it’s because despite knowing nothing, he has this instinct that Aziraphale is the only one who can possibly understand why Gabriel did what he did. He is, I mean as far as we know, the only other angel who has fallen in love. (In general, let alone with a demon.)

But nope, can’t have that. We can throw the promise of restoring Crowley in the mix to sweeten the pot, but we can’t acknowledge why he’d want that so badly in the first place. So now it’s cause they work so well together. We can praise the angel for the fallen archangel Gabriel himself coming to him protection and guidance, give him a gold star. But we couldn’t DARE imply that it was by virtue of Aziraphale’s courage to choose earthly love over heavenly. How Gabriel didn’t need a leader, but a friend who’s truly known the joys of adoring that “particular person” and the pain of needing to hide it.

Cause then Aziraphale would start getting crazy ideas, like that his silly little human feelings have a great deal of worth. That they have the power to inspire, form cracks in the institution, fundamentally weaken what has controlled and harmed him. We wouldn’t want him to know the true value of the cards he holds when he has the ace in a match against you, now would we? After all…

Metatron uses this ingeniously sinister tactic of taking away Aziraphale’s choice while giving the illusion that he’s actually opening up doors. Notice how he tells Aziraphale he would have the authority to do something as extraordinary as turn a demon into an angel, yet he never once puts the much simpler alternative of just working with a demon on the table? The sleight of hand here is that he’s being offered the opportunity to freely be with Crowley… but he’s already freely with him as is, no bargain to be made. In fact he fought to be. Metatron disappears this accomplishment right before our eyes, while seamlessly maintaining the illusion to Aziraphale that he (Zira) is in control.

He sets Aziraphale up for failure by only providing the option he knows Crowley will not only decline but be deeply hurt by. It’s all so cleverly planned. Once this plays out exactly how he wants, he delivers the finishing blow by diminishing Crowley and his “damned fool questions”. Suddenly doing a complete 180 and emphasizing how foolish and troublesome he is. Metatron was offering Crowley by Aziraphale’s side as The Carrot. Now he’s telling Aziraphale it was stupid of him to want The Carrot, un-heavenly.

Aziraphale’s life, love, happiness, it’s all not only a massive inconvenience for Metatron but a liability. He has successfully taken a weapon from Aziraphale’s hands he didn’t even know he had. Metatron sees the writing on the wall, and he wants it contained.

[reidmotif]

Regret on the Rocks

Summary: Spencer finds himself at a bar being served by the girl who once broke his heart. Turns out she feels a lot more than just regret for letting him go.

Couple: Spencer Reid/Fem!Reader

Category: Light Angst/Smut

Content Warning: drinking, Spencer is a little depressed, mentions of heavy bullying (specifically 3x16), car sex, female masturbation, Spencer POV, heavy kissing, unprotected penetrative sex

Word Count: 4.3k

Masterlist

Regret is an emotion I’m well accustomed to. It’s not to mean that I’m unhappy with my life by any means, but I’m aware of the space between my current situation and the ‘beyond’ that could’ve been if things had just been different. 

If I’d never joined the BAU.

If I’d had a more conventional life in the first place.

If connection came to me as easy as it seemed to other people my age. 

But none of those things seemed to ring true, so I carried regret in me like a bruise of honor. Despite the regret, I faced it every day and lived to do it all over again in the morning. It didn’t mean it was easy, and today proved that. Today, it was hard going to sleep knowing I’d wake up to do it all over again. 

In light of this, I’d found myself in a bar, alone. The case we’d been working on saw little to no fruition despite our efforts, and it’d resulted in another body we couldn’t save. Another person I was responsible for. It weighed down on me more than I cared to admit. 

I found myself continually lost in my thoughts, navigating through the carefully weaved web of guilt and self-doubt, spiraling, until a much softer, surprised voice pulled me out. 

“Spencer Reid? Is that you?” She asks. I hear her voice before I see her, and I know that it’s the bartender stood behind the bar, and there’s confusion as I wonder who could’ve possibly recognized me in a rundown small-town bar.

I look up and meet her eyes, and it’s as if a flood of memories ensues. A flash of recognition crosses my face, and seeing the images playing in my head, almost akin to a film reel, slowly walking me through one of my earliest regrets. 

I was 15, navigating my senior year while being the youngest one there. Despite the oddness of my situation, it never crossed my mind that I shouldn’t have tried so hard to participate in the same social events as my peers. With the hindsight of adulthood, I now imagine that if I had withdrawn, spent more of my time alone than trying to not be,  the hurt of never being accepted would sting less, because I’d never had tried in the first place.

But I had tried, and she was the only one who got me. She was older, yes, and beautiful and popular,  but those didn’t matter half as much as the conversations we’d manage to have. She never seemed to take offense to any ramble of mine, and I’d feel my heart soar when she’d ask questions after my monologues, sending me the clearest signals of interest in what I had to say.

And as a lonely 15 year old? It meant the absolute world to have that. To have her as my friend.

And so, when it came time for senior prom, in the interest of at least trying to fit in, I asked her to go with me. As friends of course, but even then she shook her head, and ruefully told me someone else had asked her. I vaguely recalled the name she’d given me off of a football roster I’d once read while attending the school, and nodded. I understood. I was prepared for the rejection, in fact I’d already taken it the moment she said no. I was prepared to live with it.

Then came the week before prom. Being lured away from the safety of the campus, and onto a football field. Being tied to a flagpole, while everyone watched- and laughed. I remember seeing a face, his face, knowing he was the one who was taking her. Taking (Y/N) to the prom. 

I rarely dwell on the events of that day, but I do remember the regret. I remember wondering that if I’d just never spoken to her, I’d maybe have been less of a target. I wondered if maybe I’d never asked her in the first place, maybe our friendship could’ve survived the whole ordeal, but it hadn’t. She never spoke to me after that, her head hanging low as she continued to hang off of his arm, never sparing me another glance again. 

But here she was, glancing- no, staring at me, her eyes wide. 

“What are you doing here? Are you.. Did you always live here all along?” She asks, her voice uncharacteristically soft and mellow. She was loud back in high school, I remember. She had the best laugh I’d ever known. 

It takes me a second, but I give her a flat smile, setting my glass down. “I’m here for a case, actually.” 

“A case..?” She says, her head tilting a bit in confusion. 

Clearing my throat, I nod. “Yeah, a case. I’m an FBI agent. I’m here for a recent string of murders being committed in the area.” 

“Wow, FBI, huh? I never thought of you as law enforcement.” She says, her eyebrows raising. “Always thought you were going to change the world with that brain of yours.” She adds, a small smile on her face. My eyes narrow in distrust at the sudden compliment, unsure of her intentions. 

“I’d say I’m changing the world.” I respond, a little defensively. “I like my job. I like that I change lives by not letting them end.”

She immediately retracts her statement, vehemently shaking her head. “No, no! That’s not what I meant at all. I mean, of course you’re changing the world- I just thought you’d be doing more. Okay- not more. I just- Gah. I swear, don’t take it the wrong way.” She pauses, before gesturing to herself.  “I mean, I have no room to talk.” She says, the words a little rushed and frantic. 

“What do you mean, no room to talk?” I ask, squinting in genuine confusion. 

“I mean, I work as a bartender. I don’t know what I want from life, but it’s certainly not this.” She says, motioning to the shelves of drinks behind her, a little defeated. 

She’s so different from when I knew her. Self-assured. Confident. She seemed almost meek in this environment, and the only recognition of the girl I knew came from the small, embarrassed smile she gave me.

“Well. We’re a lot more alike than you think, then. Titles mean nothing.” I say, voice a bit quieter. “I don’t think it’s anything to be ashamed of, though. We’re just getting through life the best we can, right?” 

She nods a little, seeming to take comfort in my statement. “Look at you. You’ve still got the same sweetness in you from high school.” 

Stiffening at the mention of high school, I just nod and taking another sip from the glass in front of me, which was starting to empty out. “Not trying to be sweet, I think. Just honest.” I say, bluntly.

It’s mean, I’m aware. I can feel her trying, but I don’t want to offer her the same. I want her to feel awkward. I want her to know what she did was wrong. 

There’s a silence that passes through the two of us, before she breaks it with a continued gesture of kindness, turning around to fill another glass with my drink of choice and setting it down in front of me, a small smile playing on her lips. 

“For being honest then. Thank you.” She says, and her eyes meet with mine. I almost hear the unspoken apology in her voice, in the way her fingers slowly push the chilled glass towards my empty hand, in the way she bites her lip softly, waiting to see what I’d say.

“To being honest.” I say, raising the glass slightly and downing the drink a little faster than I intended, not wanting to think too much about the implications of the gesture. To know that she possibly had regrets too. That she might still have the goodness I once knew in her. 

“I have about half an hour left in my shift, but if it’s alright, I’d love to catch up properly.” She says, keeping her gaze trained on mine. “I’ve.. missed you.” She says, her voice soft. 

I don’t respond to her last statement, but I can’t deny the magnetic pull begging me to say yes to her request, to at least see where our lives had gone after our separation. So I nod, silently.

“I’ll be here.” 

I try to lay off the drinks for the next thirty minutes, opting to sip some water instead to clear my mind in preparation for the time I’d be spending with her. Part of me wondered if I shouldn’t have accepted the invite at all. It wasn’t that I forgave her per say,  but the curiosity to know her all over again was overwhelming, regardless of the pain she’d caused me. I’m once again reminded why “curiosity killed the cat” is such an overused aphorism.

She comes up to me thirty-six minutes later, and I hate myself for keeping track. She flashes me a small smile. 

“You waited.” She says, softly. 

“I said I would, right?” I respond, unsure why that would mean anything to her. I agreed to this. I wanted this, even if I could physically feel the inner turmoil brewing throughout my body. I suppose it didn’t show though, because she continued on, smiling. 

“There’s an ice cream place I like around here. Would you like to go?” She asks, and I see her teeth catch onto her bottom lip, the plumpness of the feature being exacerbated by the action, causing me to momentarily lose my train of thought. 

“Uh. Yeah, ice cream. Sounds good.” I say, placing my hands in my pockets. 

“Did you drive here? I mean- I hope not. You drank quite a bit.” She says, starting to walk to the exit of the bar. 

“No, no. My hotel is actually right here. I walked. Needed to get my mind off some things and I ended up here since it was convenient.” I say, and I feel myself falling back into that comfortable rhythm of just being able to speak freely around her. 

It’s like no time has passed at all, and yet I’m acutely aware that nothing is the same. That we’re avoiding a bigger issue at hand. 

“Yeah.” She murmurs. “The murders around here have been grisly, haven’t they?” She says, starting to lead me to her car. “I get nervous when I hear about that stuff, so I find myself looking away from the news more often than not.” She continues, quirking her mouth to the other side, as if she’s aware this isn’t the best course of action, but does it anyway.

“It’s cute.” I think.

I push the thought away. 

“Understandable.” I reply, nodding. “I don’t watch the news either. I mean- I do read the news. But I don’t watch it.” 

She starts the car, and I observe a hint of a grin on her face, her eyes crinkling at the edges in a way that makes my heart jump. “So you still like to read then?” She says, seeming genuinely happy I’d kept up the habit even after my youth. 

“Oh yeah. I mean, reading isn’t something I really ever let go of. It’s a good activity when you’re out on the road so much.” I say, feeling solace in talking about something I truly loved. “Sometimes I feel like books provide me with better stimuli than social interaction.” I continue, unaware of the implications of my words, and I only realize once I’ve seen her raise an eyebrow. 

“Yeah, but I mean. Friends are good too, right?” She says, a hint of concern making her way into her voice. 

I chuckle a little bitterly. “Probably. I mean, don’t get me wrong. I have my team, and I’m grateful but-” I pause, taking a deep breath. “I don’t know. It doesn’t come to me like that, you know? And I’m not bothered by it, but I don’t like to think about it.” I say. There’s a faint feeling of heat on my face from the honesty, but I continue to stare straight ahead, not wanting to see her reaction to my words. 

“You were a good friend to me, Spencer. Better than a lot of the friends I had in high school, and I’m not just saying that.” She says, softly. 

I respond without thinking, shaking my head with an embittered motion and a click of my tongue.

“Yeah, and look where that got me.” 

She’s a little silent then, and I refuse to say anything else. She’s the one who invited me here. I don’t know what she wanted out of this, but I wasn’t going to forego my own feelings just to spare hers. I was here. That was enough. I was allowed to say that. 

We pull into an empty parking lot, where I see the neon lights advertising an ice cream parlor, but we don’t get out. She turns off the headlights and blows a bit of air between her lips, placing her hands in her lap and turning towards me. 

“Spencer.” She murmurs, swallowing a bit. “I am so, so sorry for what I did in high school. I know I wasn’t there when.. You know when. And I know I didn’t speak to you afterwards, and I am so sorry.” She repeats. “I hope you believe me when I say I really did miss you. I was such an idiot back in high school, and nothing can repair that, but I missed you so much.” She says. 

I turn to her and can see the tears welling up in her eyes and feel my heart soften. It’s insane, the effect she can have on me, even years later. 

“Hey, don’t cry.” I say, immediately reaching over to wipe a tear from her cheek, my thumb swiping over the expanse of her smooth skin. “It’s just high school. It’s a long time ago.” 

“No.” She says, emphatically, shaking her head. “Don’t lie to me. What I did was awful. It doesn’t matter if it was long ago. You can call me a bitch. You can- scream or hell! I don’t know. You can be angry at me. You should be angry at me. I could never say sorry enough.” She says. 

I shake my head, all the previous resentment and bitterness dissipating instantly. It was a bit odd, feeling the emotions I’d long held onto even years after our fracture go away so quickly, but she was my friend. For what it had been worth, she had been good to me.  And right now, she was my friend, crying in a car, and the guilt and shame couldn’t be more obvious. 

I move to hold her hand, wanting to comfort her, rubbing small circles into the skin near her thumb, her fingers grasping over mine, almost afraid to let me go now.

“You’re right, in a way. What you did confused me and left me feeling really.. lonely. But now that I’m older I think I better understand it, but it doesn’t change the fact you hurt me.” I reply, and I see her jaw tighten, nodding and taking my words to heart. 

“But I don’t think I resent you anymore for what happened.” I continue, the words tumbling out. “Seeing you guilty and ashamed so many years later is just making me wish we’d talked earlier, so we wouldn’t have had to feel this way for so long. Maybe we could’ve.. I don’t know. Picked up where we left off.” 

She gives me a flat smile, tears still in her eyes. “Yeah? I’d have liked that.” She murmurs. 

“I mean it.” I say, flashing her a soft smile. I decided to lighten the conversation for her comfort. 

“Doesn’t mean I won’t call you an idiot for dating that prick though.” I respond, a little teasingly, hoping to get a bigger smile out of her. 

“Oh god.” She says, leaning back, laughing a bit. “Please do. God, he was so .. awful.” She says. “He wasn’t half as funny as you. Just.. boring honestly.” 

I smirk a little at the words, feeling a bit of pride but brushing it off with a shrug. “I mean, it's a cliche right? Beautiful, smart girl with the boring jock?” I say. “You and like, 6 out of 10 high school girls probably fall directly into that category.” 

She gives me a laugh at that one, a real one, and my heart soars upon the sound alone. I hadn’t realized just how much I’d missed her.

 “6 out of 10? Where’s that statistic from? High School Girls Anonymous?” She responds, matching my energy and continuing the banter.

“Just trust me. I know these things very well.” I say, trying my best to sound as faux academic as possible, hoping to make her feel at ease, to fully let go of the tension from before.

“Well, then.” She says, softly, turning the conversation to be a bit more sincere. “I’m glad I don’t fall into that cliche anymore. I’m glad my taste changed.” 

I nod, surprisingly relaxing into the vulnerability of the words. “Yeah, it happens. Tastes do change throughout life, especially post-adolescence. One could denote it to the development of the prefrontal cortex, but I like to say it’s out of knowing what you want out of life.” 

“Have yours? I mean, your tastes. Have they changed?” She asks, her eyes boring into mine, and I realize that my hand is still holding hers.

I lick my lips and shrug. “Here and there. For the most part, yes, but I find myself clinging to certain aspects of my teenage self.” I respond, vaguely. 

She continues to look at me, nodding. “Mine have. For sure.” “How so?” I ask, my heart speedingbup. 

“I think I learned to like sweeter guys.” She says, softly. “Ones that don’t bore me entirely, and ones I actually want to spend time with. Maybe that’s a cliche in itself but..” She shrugs, ending off her sentence there. 

I nod, wondering where this was leading. Her eyes were trained on mine and I could feel my pulse quickening. Was she going to kiss me? Was I going to kiss her? Was I crazy for thinking that at all? What was happening here? 

“You said you still have certain aspects of your teenage self in your tastes.” She says suddenly, her face moving a bit closer to mine. “What did you mean by that?” 

I sigh, taking in the features of her face, and how they seem to be illuminated by the moonlight streaming through the windows of her car. She was so stunning, even now. Even after all these years, I couldn’t deny she’d only grown to be more beautiful.

 I lick my lips and nod. “I guess I just meant.. I still find you just as beautiful as I did back when I first knew you. Even moreso now, honestly.” I say, quietly. 

I can feel her breath hitch, and her own tongue darting out to wet her lips, mirroring my actions. Her gaze shifts from my eyes to my lips, and back to my lips again, and I’m extremely aware of what I want at this moment. 

“Can I kiss you?” I ask, my hand still in hers, studying her with a careful gaze. 

She nods almost immediately, and at the same time, we surge forward to meet the other’s lips, her hands immediately cupping my cheek and my hands moving to her waist. I hear the click of her seatbelt being unfastened, and suddenly she’s in the passenger seat with me, straddling my waist and continuing to keep her lips locked firmly on mine. 

It’s like I can’t get enough of her, my hands exploring her back, eventually lowering them to squeeze her ass, which elicits a low moan from her. I pull back a little, panting and see her eyes blown out with lust, causing me to groan from just how deep my desire for her ran in this moment. I let one of my hands to run over her bottom lip, pulling it down and letting it bounce back up, enamored by just how close she was. 

“Fuck.” I murmur, unable to contain my awe at her and without wasting a moment, she’s grabbing my hair roughly to pull me back in again to meet her mouth with mine. When given the opportunity from another soft moan from her, I immediately slip my tongue into her mouth, relishing in the way she grabs my collar and presses her body against mine, matching my enthusiasm one for one. 

It felt so good to be wanted by her.

She starts to whimper at the intensity of our prolonged contact, and the sound activates something primal in me. It was almost as if once I heard it, I couldn’t go back. Pulling myself back from the kiss, I start to trail my lips up and down her neck, leaving hot, wet kisses in my wake while she writhed in my lap, her fingers tugging on my hair in desperation. I played with the motion for a bit, testing out certain points on her, before finding that she’d moan loudest at a pulse point at the junction in which her jawline met her neck. I sucked on the spot, being sure to leave a large, dark mark.

I didn’t care what would happen after this night, but for right now, she was mine, and I intended to treat her as such. 

“You said your hotel room was nearby, right?” She pants, starting to move her thighs off mine. “We can go and-” 

I immediately wrap my arms around her waist, pulling her back against me with a force that surprised even me, before gripping her hair and placing my mouth near the shell of her ear. I can hear her squeak at the motion, but her legs relax back into straddling mine. 

“I want you now.” I whisper, my voice hoarse and low. “We can go, if you’d like but- I need you now. I can’t stress that enough.” 

She melts in my arms as I say that, and a grin comes upon my face from the desire she was displaying as well. She nods quickly, before moving her fingers to my belt, and just upon hearing the sounds of the hardware moving, my head involuntarily falls back because- holy fuck. Feeling her so close to where my pants were now currently constricted nearly had me finishing right there. I could barely look at her without feeling overwhelmed. I feel my cock being pulled from my briefs, and I let out a moan. 

I look at her again, and she’s the picture of lust. Her pupils are dilated and her hair is messy, and her mouth slightly agape. She’s everything I want right now. All I want. 

“You’re so big.” She mumbles, leaning back, her hand wrapped around me, beginning to stroke me in a gentle, rhythmic motion. 

“Yeah?” I murmur back, breathing in sharply when her thumb runs over my slit, feeling the precum already dripping down my shaft. Even her hand is making me question if I’ll finish right here before ever getting to be inside her.

“Yeah.” She whispers, almost breathlessly. 

“You can take it.” I say, looking at her, and the girl looks like she’s about to moan off of my words alone. She licks her lips before responding, her voice a bit higher than before. 

“I don’t have a condom- but I’m clean and-” 

“Yes.” I respond immediately and she moves quickly. My fingers, as if possessed, move to unbutton her dress a bit, letting her breasts spill out (to my delight). The urge to strip her bare for me crosses my mind, but then I’m acutely aware that we were in her car, and the risk of being caught was far too high for the pleasantries I wished to indulge her and myself in, and I find myself slightly wishing we had gone to the hotel room. Next time.

Before I get too caught up in the fantasy of possibly ever fucking her again, I see her reach under her dress, presumably to move her panties aside and groan at the thought. My hands roam over her body to find her hips, slowly guiding her onto my cock, her walls squeezing around me tightly as her hips met mine. 

Her moans were sweet, but I found my hand covering her mouth quickly, watching as her eyes shone with pleasure with just the slightest movement from either of us. 

“Need you to stay quiet, pretty girl.” I murmur. “You can do that for me, right?”

She nods, eager to please, and I keep my hand on her mouth for a moment too long as I watch her eyes flutter shut, then open, her hands wrapping around my neck to stabilize herself. She starts moving then, lifting off until my tip is the only thing inside of her, before slamming against me, creating the best type of friction for both of us, causing there to be desperation for more. My hands rush down to grip her waist, and I can barely stifle my own noises from how fucking good she feels.

It’s a frenzy after that, and I match her movements with thrusts from below. I know it’s enjoyable for her, based on how hard she’s trying to not make a single sound, but still lets out the tiniest little whimpers and gasps when my cock grinds against her spot, and from the way her thighs shake every single time I disappear deep into her, a small bulge forming in her lower stomach every time I pushed into her. Every clench and squeeze of her cunt drives me insane, and I can’t help the low groan slipping out of me. 

Her movements get erratic, signaling her end, and I grin at how quickly I managed to get her there. My fingers move to stroke her clit in circular motions, savoring the way I could hear her whisper my name, grinding down on my dick and chasing the feeling of my fingers on her. 

“Close?” I mumble, biting down on her shoulder lightly, which causes a louder moan to slip out of her. 

“Yes. Yes.” She whispers, breathlessly. “Please, Spencer. Oh god. Please.” 

I jut into her more rapidly, continuing the motions against her, before her walls tighten and squeeze around me, and her cunt flooding the base of my cock. I continue to move like a man possessed, swallowing the moans of her orgasm with a messy kiss, before finally, I reach my release as well, coating her walls from the inside out. 

She pants for a second, collapsing against my shoulder as she tries to catch her breath, and I stroke her hair, attempting to do the same. She moans softly, her hands wrapped around me as her eyes flutter open and shut. 

“I was wrong.” She mumbles, nuzzling into my shoulder, kissing it softly. I’m unsure about the meaning of the words, so I quietly ask her. 

“What about?” 

“You’re incredibly different from when we were in high school.” She says, softly. 

“Good or bad different? I ask, a little self consciously, which is amusing considering I’m still inside her. 

“Good. Really, really fucking good.” She clarifies, quickly, with a dazed smile. I lean in, kissing her a bit more softly now, letting my lips languidly trace over hers. 

“You too.” I murmur, and I can feel her smile against my lips.

No regrets about this one. 

WOAHHH. oh em gee. a fic! so so so deeply sorry i didn't live upto posting more fics this december and january, but i swear i'm gonna keep trying to at least get two out a month. valentines day is coming up, so you already know i'm gonna try and write something fluffy and cute for that, so look out for that. as usual, thank you so so much for any and all continued support. it seriously means the world to me and i cannot say that enough <3 i hope this fic was enjoyable. like, reblog, comment, whatever <3 just ty for reading!! <3

[oimitocat]

HEARTBEAT | OS

yeonjun, kai (seperately) x gn!reader

angst + subtle fluff + crying + insecurity + breakups + idol au! + unhealthy mechanisms + 6thmember!reader + implied depression

a/n: can be read as M!READER. i’m sorry if this is trash, i feel like i this isn’t very good ;(

from his earlier training years, yeonjun knew who he was. he was talented. other trainees feared being paired up with him- they would never fully shine next to him. it’s not something he boasts about, he is proud about it, of course, but… he remembers how lonely it was.

remembers how hard he had to keep exceeding if he did everything flawlessly. he couldn’t give anything less than what he has so easily done up until then. yet…. you managed to be on his level. easily. naturally.

you enamored him from the moment he saw your name at the top of the weekly evaluation scores. second. you were second.

“wanna go eat something?” yeonjun asks with a smile, appearing before your view.

you were looking at the schedule your manager sent. once more, you’re more prone to being in the dorms or your studio than going out the city for anything. yeonjun has a busy month after tomorrow.

you’re always second.

“i’m good.” you say flatly.

unsure if you’re joking, yeonjun prods. “n/n, let’s go eat! i’m craving something from the corner store. oh! how about that phò you like? let’s go! i also heard we can take a car-“

“yeonjun go by yourself.” you groan.

“eh?” yeonjun pouts, sitting on your bed and shaking you. “n/n are you okay? you mad? you upset?” he asks, but he’s joking. he’s not actually concerned.

he always has other things to worry about.

“i wanna be by myself today, yeonjun.”

“well i don’t care! i want to be with you before my promotions start up-“

“well i don’t.”

yeonjun pauses, realizing you’re actually not in a good mood. he stares at your figure, back facing him. he hesitates before shaking you gently, “y/n-“

“ugh do you have to be so annoying? no one wants to be around your twenty four seven!” you huff as you sit up to glare at him.

he stares at you, surprised. “what are you talking about-“

“you’re always so full of yourself! always wanting the attention on you! you just want to go out so that someone spots you and they post about how you’re roaming around! you always do this!”

yeonjun fidgets with the bedsheet that fell over his lap, his heart sinking. “that’s not true. what are you saying? i want to spend time with you! we’re dating!”

“out of what? pity?” you grit.

“huh? no-“

“get out.”

and he obeys. there’s no fight in him. he’s never fought with you. this is completely new and unexpected. he’s never seen you so angry and hurt. where did this come from?

he’s seen the light die in your eyes. debut was hard. the career path is brutal. fans can be just as brutal as they are loving. he’s seen how your eyes lose that brilliancy he had loved. that loving passion dimming to a bitter craving for success you probably don’t even want now. yet you always smile. you always make the most of it. you try to.

how long have you been trying for? had he not been careful with you?

“good morning,” he says when he walks inside your room the next day.

you’re awake. he knows you are.

“i brought breakfast from that place you like.” he says, sitting on your bed. “y/n we need to talk about this.”

“there’s literally nothing to talk about. i’m sorry for lashing out. i know i’m the worst.” you say.

yeonjun shakes his head, taken aback. “i didn’t say or imply that. i just want to know what’s going on-“

“nothing. it’s literally nothing, i have nothing going on, you clearly do. don’t you have to fly out later?” you say bitterly.

what’s this about? he frowns, “well yeah but i know something’s wrong. you’re upset-“

“i just want to be alone! can’t you respect that?” you groan.

yeonjun pauses. he doesn’t want to comply but he thinks it’s best. he just stands and goes out. you don’t come out all morning. he doesn’t know anything more until later that evening. his flight is at 8 pm. you haven’t touched what he brought for you. it gives him an unpleasant feeling.

his heart is heavy again. where are you? why aren’t you answering his calls or messages? why aren’t you in your room?

“y/n? i saw him go to the studio,” beomgyu says when he’s called by yeonjun.

you’re hardworking, he knows that. but he’s learned that you push yourself on days you want nothing to do with anything or anyone. you were supposed to kiss him farewell for his flight. you were supposed to hug him and say you missed him already.

‘ i have nothing going on, you clearly do. ‘ what did that mean?

you said he was full of himself… why did you say that? what made you say it?

and when he peeks inside the studio and sees you furiously writing in your notebook- he realizes. you have the headphones on and you only do that when you want no one to disturb you. yet, yeonjun doesn’t like letting things go too far. he needs to clear this up. he doesn’t want to leave knowing you’re like this with him.

“y/n…” he calls out gently, putting a hand on your shoulder.

you jump and stare at him. your expression of surprise turns dark fast. “what? aren’t you supposed to be packing?”

“i can’t see my love before leaving?” yeonjun frowns. “y/n why are you upset with me?”

“i’m not.”

“you said a bunch of hurtful things.”

“i did not. if you can’t handle the truth then maybe you can’t handle life at all.” you grit.

yeonjun finally feels something click. he has never realized what was happening until now. he should have pieced it together before. he should have seen how you started distancing yourself. mentally. emotionally.

physically you’re here.

“i’m tired of being the only one who loves you.” he says, eyes glimmering with tears. he swallows the lump in his throat, “i need you to love yourself too.”

you pause. he’s… right. “yeonjun.”

“i’ve done everything i can. i love you, i treat you good. i’ve been by your side since trainees and i’ve fallen in love with you. yet, i’ve never seen you appreciate me what i appreciate.”

“just get out-“

“why do you push me away? i’m not you,” he begs, “you can’t push yourself out of your body, but why do you push me away?”

“STOP BEING RIGHT. DAMN IT!” you slam your fist down on the desk, your notebook and pencil jumping.

yeonjun swallows, looking away. “then stop being your biggest hater… i’ve been your biggest supporter… don’t hate me too…”

you bury your face into your hands. you sob. “i’m sorry… i don’t know why i do it. i hate that the most.” you say after a long silence, yeonjun never leaves.

he’s never dared to.

why do you hate it do much?

“y/n… you need help…” yeonjun says softly, kneeling before you. his hands rub your knee. “i know you’ve felt like a less important person ever since our career has grown… but we’ve always appreciated you more than anyone and anything.”

“i know,” you sniffle, “i just… feel so alone. seeing how you even the company leaves me in the shadow sometimes.”

yeonjun quickly pulls you to the floor and with him. he hugs you and rubs your back. you sob, finally letting it out.

“i love you… i’ll do whatever i can to make this better,” he whispers.

and you can only cling to that taboo truth.

there are multiple things that have made kai decide that if he ever goes back in time he’ll never be an idol again. yes, there are a lot of things he’s grateful for experiencing and having the opportunity to do but the reality is that this is a harsh path.

the negative remarks. being overworked. the only true reasons he stands firmer are the members.

and you.

yet, it’s felt lately as if neither of you are in a relationship. all of you were exhausted from the concert tours. the company is pulling too many strings and neither of you are strung together.

“huh?” you take out your headphones, looking at him.

“can we talk?” he asks, fidgeting.

you drop everything, hoping off the game without a say. you’ll explain later, kai is always your priority.

“what is it? come here,” you move away from your desk and stand.

the two of you wander to your bed. you’re sitting opposite of him, criss cross. he sits on the edge. you don’t question it, thinking he’s just having a moment where feeling on edge makes him be just that. he’s not looking at you.

“i just feel like we haven’t actually been… lovers.”

you blink. “you want… sex right now?”

“no,” he looks up at you with wide eyes. “n-not in that way! it’s just… we’re literally so busy…. we just came back from our tour and starting tomorrow we have to start meetings and stuff to work on our next album…”

you nod, blushing. you feel a little embarrassed for assuming he wanted sex but you couldn’t help it with how he worded it. “is this about not spending much time together?”

he nods, “yeah… it feels like we’re not dating… i can’t remember the last time we were like this…”

“well it’s kind of always like this, isn’t it? we’ll have our moments soon.” you assure, placing a hand on his knee.

“we could’ve had a moment but you chose to be with your friends and your game.”

you pause, “ah- i mean yeah, okay but we’ve been stressed from all our past schedules. you know i destress through video games or being in the studio. you could’ve been in my room!”

he looks at you. you can’t decipher that look.

you’re everything he’s needed to keep afloat when he’s drowning. yet….

“do… still want this?”

you blink, “want what?”

kai swallows, “us. a relationship.”

you look around, unsure what’s happening. “of course, kai why would you ask that?”

kai shrugs, looking down at the bedsheets, “i just feel like we’re too busy sometimes to even take care of ourselves…”

“that’s the whole point of us being together,” you scoot closer and take his hands in yours, “baby, remember when you just dropped during practice and cried from how tired and exhausted you were?”

kai bites the inside of his cheek and nods. he doesn’t look up at you.

“but it’s always you taking care of me,” he tries, almost in a begging tone. “aren’t you tired? i can’t even take care of myself and i feel bad with not just everything that’s happening but knowing we have a relationship. it’s so many things i need to care for but i can’t even care for myself. everything is just too much sometimes.”

“i get that,” you rub your thumbs over his skin, “kai i get that… but you know i’m here for you-“

“and who’s there for you?” he asks accusingly.

you gently pull your hands away from him. you analyze him. you heart races. “kai… are you… tired of me?”

kai’s eyes suddenly dart towards you. “i… i’m tired of everything y/n. i just want to go to sleep and never wake up.”

you take in the glassy look of his eyes and your heart goes heavy. “do you… not want to keep our relationship going? is that what this is? i know we have a lot going on but-“

“but what’s the point?” he asks, “y/n you deserve more than this. i genuinely cannot find myself spending energy into a relationship when i’m putting more than everything i have into my career.”

you grow baffled, “kai this is our career. we’re a group-“

“exactly! we all have so much to do and so much is expected of us. i fought with myself to get out of bed and come here. the thought of spending time with you a-bored me. it felt like a chore.”

“i’m a burden to you?” you ask.

he falls silent. not daring to look at you.

“when did this start?” you ask, looking down at the bed sheets. you sit back and cross your arms in a form of hugging yourself. “when did loving me become a chore for you? did i do something wrong?”

you’re not enough. that’s all you’re hearing. you’re not enough for kai to feel like he’s enjoying his life. instead, you’re something… someone he feels like is dragging him.

“no, no,” he groans, “you’ve always been my anchor y/n,” he tries, “on my worst days you’ve been more than enough but i just. i can’t be the same for you. i receive and receive but never give back. you don’t deserve that.”

you swallow, “i-i don’t care. you deserve everything i have to offer-“

“i don’t want it.” he says soft, looking at you, “not anymore.”

“but… why?”

“because i’ll burn you out…”

“no you wouldn’t-“

“i will and i’m doing this for the both of us-“

you huff, “don’t you love me?”

with a long, sadden stare, he looks at you. you slump. you watch as his mouth moves— saying exactly what you hoped wasn’t real. you watch as he stands. you watch as he pauses.

a friendship is all you could have. are you better off being coworkers… friends… than lovers. he knew this would happen too. he just wanted to see how far you two could go.

still, you always try. “this was never going to work, was it?”

“no.”

[andrastepls]

A/SMR.

synop: reader lost her hearing after an explosion, simon has an idea to help her ‘hear’ him again

warnings: none i think ? canon typical violence & loss of hearing maybe knda spicy

not proofread we die like men

Adjusting to life without sound had been a trial on its own. It was something no-one really prepared for — silly as it seemed, now. Bombs and guns going off right next to a person for any amount of time was bound to cause damage at one point or another. Or, maybe, she just had shit luck.

The blast had come and gone so quickly, she had no time to react. No one did. It missed anything vital, but it had sent her rocketing into a wall; promptly breaking her arm, a few ribs, and rupturing her eardrums all in one fell swoop. If nothing else, recovery went relatively smoothly. As smoothly as it could have, at any rate, what with Soap and Gaz being absolutely glued to the chairs in the infirmary. Even getting kicked out a few times — luckily, Price and the Lt. were a little less chaotic. Be it because the medic on-site had a soft spot, or because Simon had intimidated the poor guy, he had been allowed to spend the first two nights in the infirm with her.

Being tucked away in his arms did wonders for her anxiety, but the cot was a bit small for him alone, let alone the pair of them. Blessedly, she had been given the okay to return to her own quarters after that.

A few months later, and her bones were good and well healed, but her ears were another story. The specialist kind. The off-duty kind. The waitlist was long, and going home, alone, in the quiet, sounded like her own personal hell. So, she stayed on base to wait it out.

The silence was her enemy, deafening in its lack of any and everything. She swore she could forget the music the world made in a moment without it. It was cold, void and lonely. Missing out on jokes, not ever hearing the booming shouts and laughter of the boys. Sounds she never thought she’d miss.

It didn’t go unnoticed. For all his grumbling and brooding, Ghost was terribly good at being good company. She was thankful for him, at least. Perhaps now more than ever. He was . . . oddly tentative of her. Making a point to brush a hand against her when he was near, what was previously a hovering palm near her back was now an open-handed reminder someone was there.

He made learning to sign feel so much easier. Subbing out some signs for military signals. A natural transition, when the other person knew how to speak it — even when he didn’t need to.

It was a kindness done solely for her benefit; a fact in which he would never admit, but she knew it to be true nevertheless.

• • •

She felt out of practice. Clumsy and uncertain of herself when he touched her, nothing like herself, and he noticed. He pulls back from her, hands curving through the space between their chests to say, “You okay?”

She swallows, looking away. Embarrassment flushes her cheeks a shade of maroon, the heat of it crawling up her neck.

“It’s not you.” she signs back after a beat, eyes finding his with nothing short of pleading in her irises, “I miss you. But the sound - ”

Lithe hands flop into her lap. She feels . . . inadequate. Incomplete. Hateful, to herself, knowing that she can’t be who he loved first anymore, “I miss hearing you.” it was a cruel thing for the universe to do to her; give her a man to fall in love with, a voice that lulled her to sleep, filled her heart, tightened her legs — and then take it away from her. Leaving her in this muffled prison.

He makes a face at that - not one of ill intent or anything of the sort - rather, one of confusion. She missed hearing him?

He never thought his voice to be something worth missing; though, he quickly understands when his mind wonders what never hearing her again would be like. His girl is quieter now, to be sure. But he can still hear her - the little noises she makes, when she hums to herself without noticing . . . among other noises . . .

There’s a moment where he stays still, only his eyes moving between the two. She’s about to lift her hands so say something else, but he promptly cuts her off by taking one of her wrists between his fingers. Encouraging her to open her hand and bringing her palm up to rest around his throat.

She pauses, wide eyes blinking between their hands and his face — that frustrating little smirk of his curling his lips upward at the corners. She can’t make sense of what he’s doing at first, canting her head to the side like a confused dog, and then, he hums. The sound vibrating against her fingers. Her jaws drops open slightly in shock, eyes locked between her hand and his mouth, wanting to say ‘again’.

Alas, he was a step ahead of her, and mumbles out her name in a breath. Feeling her name in his throat before reading it on his lips.

Hm.

A/N: i dont know its 1am !!

[ladyeyrewrites]

So many 💭💭💭💭💭💭💭💭💭 s, please

@ceeceekayblog here you go!

Part 1

Part 2

Part 3

Part 4

Part 5

Part 6

Tommy flinches, face drawn tight in a pained expression that inexplicably makes Evan want to comfort him. And then it hits him.

“Wait, did I change my last name to yours?” Evan asks.

Tommy nods, though he doesn’t look any less distraught and Evan can’t exactly blame the guy. It’s trippy enough being on this side of the memory loss equation. What must it be like for Tommy to not be remembered?

Probably sucks.

Evan tears his eyes away from the man who’s supposedly his husband and looks to his doctor. “I guess that answers that,” he tries to keep his tone light even though tears prickle his eyes and all he really wants to do is curl into a ball and fall asleep and hope that when he wakes up this will all have been a bad dream.

Evan’s not sure which version of reality he’d rather wake up to: 2017 where he’s living an itinerant life style, barely scraping by or 2027 where he’s apparently settled down enough to have a house and a husband and his sister is free of Doug.

Who’s Evan kidding? Why would he want to go back to being alone?

The doctor’s saying something about running tests, but Evan’s not really paying attention. An overwhelming sense of grief floods through him, heart throbbing, lungs tightening, stomach heavy. God it’s been so lonely.

Ever since Maddie left and he had to resort to riskier and riskier behaivior to try and snatch the tiniest morsel of his parents’ attention, he’s been so alone. He’s tried to fill that loneliness with warm bodies, but it’s chased after him, driving him from place to place, state to state, country to country, bed to bed trying to outrun that feeling of emptiness.

But this person he’s become over the last ten years, he stopped running. He found a family.

And God, Evan wants so badly for that to be true.

Suddenly there are tears in his eyes and a sob in his throat and God, he’s lost ten years.

He doesn’t even know if they were good years or bad years.

Just that they were his and now they’re gone.

And why can’t he stop crying?

Evan squeezes his eyes shut and tries to rub the tears away with the heel of his hand but they just keep coming, hot and salty down his cheeks, dripping off his chin, mixing with snot. He’s too out of it to even care how gross it is. He can’t make it stop.

And then suddenly, he’s being held.

Arms the size of tree trunks wrap warmth around him, press his head against a solid shoulder. “It’s okay, Evan. It’s going to be okay.” He feels more than hears Tommy’s voice. It’s all around him, reverberating through him.

On instinct, he clings to Tommy, sobbing until his throat is raw and his head – already aching – feels as though it’s being squeezed in a vice.

[m-musings]

Dating requests of bunnymund and pitch black (separately) where they’re dating the guardian of love?

A/N: i feel this is utter garbo, but i hope it's still good enough to post 😭😭😭

NOTICE (7/10/24) : NO LONGER WRITING FOR ROTG

Word Count:430 Warnings: none i think

Headcanons E. Aster Bunnymund and Pitch Black with a Guardian of Love! S/O

Bunny:

Bunnymund is fantastic to date!

As the Guardians of Hope and Love, you compliment each other very well. You take care of and respect each other more than anyone else on earth.

He's still tough and agile on the outside but when the two of you are able to get some peace and quiet, he's a gentle giant who just wants to cuddle.

He'd definitely be the one to call you cheesy but sweet nicknames (i.e. lovebug, cutie, muffin and of course, the ever so classic darling.)

He adores you and would do almost anything you asked if it would make you him happy, and the same applies for you.

You would both be fiercely protective of each other too. If either of you has any little inkling that the other maybe in trouble, you're rushing off to find each other.

There are times when he thinks that you may have used your powers on him to make him love you, but when he sees the look of true affection your eyes, he knows what you have together is real.

Bunny would joke that you're his own personal Cupid sent straight from the Man in the Moon and tells you he wouldn't trade you for anything.

Pitch:

Pitch is a rather reserved man. All dark corners and silent contemplation but that changes once you enter the picture.

You bring the perfect amount of color and liveliness into his monotone world.

He doesn't understand how someone could be so different from him yet be the perfect match for him. Pitch loves you more than he thought possible for someone like himself.

And while he's still bitter about his place in the world, he's less so truly angry about it with you by his side.

He will still get mad at the way humans and the other guardians have treated him, but he could never find it in himself to be angry at you.

He really tries to be a better person but if anything bad were to ever happen to you, he'd burn the entire world to the ground to take revenge.

Pitch may not always verbally express it, but its clear that he loves you just by the way he behaves around you.

Around others, he's stiff and stoic but when he's alone with you, his entire demeanor visibly softens and relaxes.

Whenever you're alone, he will secretly relish in any bit of physical affection you might give him. He was so lonely for such a long time but you changed his life simply by being there for him.

[honeymilktea-444]

💸🎀 Career/Finance messages for 2025 , Pick a Pile 💸🎀

Hi my babies! Breathe in and out and choose what picture/number you’re drawn to. Enjoy! Take what resonates and leave the rest. Left to right, 1-2 -> 3-4. 🎀

⊹₊ ˚‧︵‿₊୨୧₊‿︵‧ ˚ ₊⊹

💸 Pile One 💸

• 8 of pentacles , the hermit •

this year your career energy in 2025 will be very quiet and normal if that makes sense. you are deciding to go at it alone. you could be getting “serious” or for others you’re realizing it’s not that serious. for those of you getting more serious, you could be locking in, finding a practical, technical trade to get certified in to be able to make a stable living for yourself. you’re going to do this quietly, without distractions. you could be limiting your social interactions this year due to locking in with yourself in your career. for some, I’m getting you could be getting into the medical trade fields. I am specifically picking up on medical assisting, medical billing and coding. phlebotomy technician. vet tech. CNA. and/or pharmacy tech. dental assisting. for others, you could be getting into entry level tech positions. some of you could be getting comptia + certifications, or entry level help desk positions/certifications. for some of you, you could be getting a wfh customer service job. some of you could be virtual call center agents or that’s what you want to look into. technical writing and/or copy writing as well. some of you are deciding to enroll in school for information technology, and/or communications. some of you are also getting your GED this year or want to. (congrats babies!)

for the others of that are realizing it’s not that serious in the career sector, what i’m meaning by that is, i’m specifically picking up that some of you are wanting to get a “regular job” and live a regular life, you may have gotten money in a fast paced way, or way that is societally unethical, or in a way that puts you at risk, or takes you away from your family and things you want to make time for or on a simpler scale burdens you or overworks you. maybe it makes a lot of $$ but the price of it is high, you’re stressed, depressed and lonely. this is the it’s not that serious energy from. you may feel like it’s just not that serious to have to sacrifice your happiness, your mind, love life, family life, freedom or peace for some money. you may get a “regular job” . and be happier for your career this year. I’m picking up insta cart. or delivering Uber eats. you may be starting really small but you’ll be happy, and proud. you’re also not taking anything from anyone, maybe you’ve stolen things for a living and hate that you did that. something completely normal and legal, that makes normal people money. you don’t care if it’s low income etc. 90% of people around you are normal low - regular income people. social media may have pressured you or caused you to be out of touch with reality in thinking you had to make a certain amount of money because everyone is making that type of money, and that’s not true. you could be spending less time on the internet and living in the moment and seeing that everyone is in the same boat, and are living their normal little life whatever that looks like to them.

some of you this year for career may be doing things for work that isn’t considered cool to those around you, but it’s what you like and brings you more peace than whatever it is you were doing previously. I just heard getting out the game, some of you could “make plays” or “hit l*cks” for a living and are choosing to get out of that lifestyle and be a normal person, doing normal things for work that bring you a peace of mind, you don’t have to worry about looking over your shoulder, going to jail lol, being in beef or any of that. yes you may take a pay cut but who cares. you may also want to be there for a partner more, or settle down and be with someone and that could be why you are choosing to make a change, this lifestyle could take you away from them in some sort of way, or specifically cause you to neglect them in a sort of way. some of you could be escorts is what I’m picking up and are choosing to stop doing that because you want to have a better work life balance, and are getting just simply tired of it. some of you have fallen in love and while they don’t mind, you only are starting to have a sex drive for your person. you may also transition from that to only fans with your person. you guys who picked this pile, are ready for solitude and peace. I’m getting this pile is sensitive and introverted. you’ve never been in the mix except for work, or maybe the people around you. you’re wanting quiet and peace and solitude, you’ve always wanted this but may not have had the credentials needed for it, or the know how. you’re figuring that out this year. also for some you could have made these decisions for work because of your family. for some i’m getting a toxic family or toxic mother specifically, who pressured you to take care of the her or them at a young age and forced you into that route. you could be the eldest, or the baby that had to pick up the slack. for some you had a parental figure who trafficked you or forced you into some sort of sex work and that’s how you got into it. a past partner could have done this as well. i’m channeling the movie Gangubai Kathiawadi. You are deciding to stop. you aren’t going to do anything that you don’t want to do anymore. If you do still want to do it, you are transitioning into doing it in a way that feels more safe and comfortable for you, in a way that respects your boundaries and in a way that doesn’t force you to be around or interact with horrible people. Some of you are heading to domestic violence shelters for support from a toxic family , or partner. they could introduce you to work programs. i’m also picking up the goodwill. some of you could be signing up for a goodwill career program, or getting your GED through them this year, or getting certified in something, as well as Job Corps if those programs still exist in whatever state you’re in.

Some of you could live in DC because I’m picking up on the school UDC. You guys in this pile are cutting ties with toxic families, and partners. You guys are choosing to go at it alone, if it means peace and safety. I’m picking up the song “You’re on your own kid” by Taylor Swift. I’m also channeling a peace and safety meditation or set of affirmations so maybe you guys are listening to those if you are, it’s working. If not it just represents that you guys are prioritizing your peace and safety. Somebody could be 38, 34, 35-6. 24, 25, 26-8. 30. You guys have been doing this all of your lives. For so many years. You’re choosing to stop. The catalyst for this, is you could have missed out on something, or missed out on being there for someone important because of this lifestyle and you’re resentful of everyone around you and have decided to completely stop and get help or change things around. For some a family member who was not good to you passed away, this was their karma. You’re going to be okay, and this is the correct move you will be protected the whole way through for whoever this part of the reading is resonating with. I’m proud of you pile 1. 🥰

💸 Pile Two 💸

• 2 of pentacles, page of wands •

This year you’ll be juggling a lot in career. A lot of opportunities will be coming towards you and you won’t be missing out on any of them lol. I’m picking up YOLO. So, you’re not turning any opportunities to make more money, down. Others of you are deciding to pick up a second job. Or moonlight your passion or something that is more fun for you while you work your 9-5. For example, say you work at a warehouse and it pays the bills and provides stability. You crave more creative expression or to do something that is fun and enjoyable so you start selling or drawing prints on the side. Or you’re picking up bartending gigs on the side because you’ve always wanted to do that. You’re adding something to your career that is more fun, or a passion of yours, to do on the side. Not everyone has to be a full blown entrepreneur that’s not everyone’s path. Some people appreciate the stability that a 9-5 brings. This could be you, but you still want to creatively express yourself so you will do it this way and it will bring in extra money as a result and also help you feel alive and happy. Good luck Pile 2. This pile was very short and sweet, indicating you’re very decisive about this decision. I also see that whatever this side hustle is will bring you random waves of large chunks of money. So one week something might bring you $50. Then the next week, a sale will come in at $200. Nothing unrealistic like thousands of dollars but lots of waves of luck. $200 , then time passes and it’s $800 then $500. Whatever this is could be something you’re selling or creating, or flipping. Good luck babes! Lots of positivity in this pile. 🥰

💸 Pile Three 💸

• queen of wands •

This year you’ll be pursuing whatever you feel like pursuing, meaning you have a lot of creative leadership ideas and you will be having the confidence to pursue it. You may be very busy. You may get promoted as a manager at your job. Some of you may work at retail stores. Many of you may start a side hustle, I’m picking up on tik tok, I’m also hearing digital marketing. Some of you may be in college for marketing or communications, or thinking of taking that on as you still hold down a job. Do it. You may also be thinking of going to school for business management or project management, or getting your MBA. Do it. You all may be working full time as you’re doing this. But it will all get done. Some of you may make jewelry on the side or are thinking about it. Do it. If you are already doing it, you may see an increase of sales. I’m picking up on a lot of you all in this group taking up side hustles, more so trendy side hustles that are being taught right now. Digital marketing, Canva, youtube, virtual assisting, freelancing on the side. You should definitely move forward with this. Some of you want to sew, or crochet, and sell your crafts. I’m picking up something that involves glue as well. I’m also channeling an only fans. I’m seeing some of you starting an only fans but not showing your face, or doing positions that are mainly showing your back (reverse cowgirl, doggy style) I’m seeing success in this. The money will be of much help to you. You will also simply enjoy it. Go for it all. You’ll be successful, even if it takes a while to build. There’s also an emphasis on social media. Twitter, YouTube and Tik-Tok. You may use these platforms to market or make money with your side hustles. You’ll gain attention and popularity even if on a small scale, it’ll all transfer into money in the bank for you. For those of you starting a faceless only fans I’m picking up on a Twitter account, I’m also hearing Reddit. Those two sites may be beneficial to you. & will bring in traffic to your account. By any means this pile will be making some extra money to make ends meet and it will absolutely work. I’m also hearing save some of this money, or open up a savings account if you don’t have one. I’m also hearing always put money aside for gas and groceries. I don’t know who that’s for but I’m picking that up. Do your thing pile 3 Period! 🥰

💸 Pile Four 💸

• knight of pentacles •

This year will be a year of steady progress for you. Whatever you’ve been doing, you will continue to do and it’ll be consistent and reliable. Steady paychecks, routine activities on the job, quiet and peaceful. Minding your business and getting paid. There won’t be any sudden windfalls or dramatic changes, but there will be steady income. If you have a specific money or career goal you want to meet, you’ll spend this year working towards it, and you will make slow and steady progress. You’ll have enough, you’ll be taken care of and satisfied. You could be building your savings up very slowly, or slowly knocking off debt, or working towards a large purchase. For some you could be saving up to purchase a car. You’ll reach that goal. For some you could be saving up for an apartment or things to put in the apartment. For others, you could building a van, or saving up for a van to build things in. Slow and steady. The thing I’m picking up the most is stability, this year your career will bring you stability. If you don’t have it already, this year you will achieve it or be well towards it. Whatever you’ve been doing in career, you will keep doing it. This isn’t a card of change, but a card on grounded, covert persistence. I’m picking up the song “Almost there” from Princess and The Frog, you guys are definitely saving money for a big purchase. This year will be the same work routine. For some you guys will reach your goal by summer time, others December. I’m getting May and April as well. Someone here’s name could be Ariana, or have a T or K name. Living in the “hood” or “projects” or being “low income” could be significant for you, I’m channeling that but have no idea what the significance is, but you will for whoever this resonates for. Some of you could be working to get certified in something. Some of you here could love playing sims, or watching sim builds. Some of you could benefit from budget planning this year, or you have decided to start doing this and this will work wonders for you! Or debt tracking, or cash stuffing. I cannot stress how amazing this will be for you if you do this. It’s coming through as amazing, or “amazing results” . You guys will be organizing your life, specifically digitally. Some of you could be clearing out things from files, and phones, clearing out subscriptions. Mapping out all of your expenses, mapping out your goals. Some of you could be in school to be tax professionals, insurance professionals, bookkeepers, accountants. Or are thinking of entering this field, some of you are majoring in finance, or want to. These fields will bring success and mesh really well with your natural abilities and personalities. Keep going, if you are already studying these fields. Some of you could be strippers and you’re saving every penny you make until you reach a certain goal. Keep going if this is you. You are very close to reaching your goal. I’m picking up the number 6. In 6 months you could reach this goal, or maybe the goal is to save $6000. Someone could be born on the 6th of the month, or in June. Everything will be steady, and the same as last year; the progress will be the same as last year steady and consistent and I don’t see anything changing or any negativity or unexpected unfortunate events interrupting this. Also, keep this plan to yourself, I’m not seeing anything big or negative but just being guided to tell you not to get distracted and don’t let opinions stop you. You’re literally almost to the finish line. Also someone needs to clean their room up lol and wash their hair , and groom their feet. Don’t forget about yourself . Someone has been meaning to get their toes done, or wash their hair or shave. Get on that. It’s okay to take a self care day even if it’s really small and simple bc it’s on a budget. I’m picking up DIY rubber gel nail kits from Amazon. Invest in that, it’ll make you feel better or maybe some of you are already doing that. Keep it up. You need those little pick me ups. & Drink more water. Keep up the good work pile 4. 🥰

• feel free to reblog, like or comment if it resonated. remember to be kind, and don’t post my content as your own. love you. thanks for supporting. •