#'love me tender love me true' *sobs*
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seiwas · 10 months ago
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i maxxed the tags (what did i expect) but!!
what a soft piece ari 🥺 thank you for sharing this hurt/comfort piece w us!! i think satoru will always be a figure of strength—but i think it’s in part because that’s how he brands himself to be around the people he cares about. he’ll never truly share how he thinks and feels about things, will almost always downplay it really. but he’s always worrying, always aware and cautious, overthinking 🥺 and i felt that loads here!!
there’s a shipwreck stuck between your ribs ; satoru gojo
synopsis; three times satoru sees you cry, and the understanding you gain of each other from it.
word count; 4.6k
contents; satoru gojo/reader, gn!reader, the synopsis speaks for itself i think, copious amounts of hurt/comfort, i just think he’d be so good at comforting u :ccc, also fluff!!, he’s addicted to calling u ”baby,” satoru gojo vs human emotion (he loses)
a/n; pls ignore the fact that 90% of my gojo fics are hurt/comfort ok we dont need to get into that <33 the writing in this one might be a lil rusty but im pretty fond of this gojo :’3
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dim lights, buttery popcorn, and boredom.
the senses invading his mind are mellow, coaxing, a little tedious. all he can see are the buzzing lights before him, all he can hear is the insistent chewing of the people around him, and all he can feel is just that:
boredom.
satoru stifles a yawn, resting his cheek on the heel of his palm. he’s trying to pay attention — really, he is. trying to pay attention to the movie he picked out himself, after thoughtful consideration, one he’s been looking forward to watching with you all week. he’s trying his best. but, gosh, it’s just so boring.
or maybe he just doesn’t have it in him today — with all these too-dim lights, too-loud popcorn-chewers, and the too-convoluted plot playing on the big screen in front of him. he has no idea what’s happening, anymore, what scene this is supposed to be. some sob-story? he clocked out a while ago.
so, with nothing better to do — satoru decides to savour another view.
that’s how it always goes. no matter the movie, no matter the snacks, whether you’re watching at home on the couch or a nearby movie theatre — eventually, when his eyelids begin to grow heavy, or when his attention span begins to falter, that blue-soaked gaze of his shifts. a moth to a flame, following his instincts. constantly looking over to see what kind of face you're making. 
after all, your reactions are far more entertaining than any movie could ever hope to be. little sighs of exasperation, jolts and shivers down your spine, or a laughter so bubbly he can’t resist leaning in for a kiss or ten — he loves it. adores it. lives and dies by it. 
so satoru turns his head, and looks at you, knowing you’ll save him from the boredom clutching at his subconscious. 
and something in his chest constricts.
at first, he doesn’t notice it. hungrily lapping over the expanse of your jaw, to your cheekbones, his gaze drinking in everything he can see. scanning your eyes for a hint of emotion; and he finds it. he finds it in something that glimmers in the dim lighting of the theatre, something that has his breath drawing back to the depths of his throat.
tears.
crystalline, dew-drawn, a fresh set of tears clinging to the edge of your lash line. they’ve yet to fall, but satoru sees them — he sees them and he doesn’t know what to do. 
tears. 
tears?
you’re crying.
in the depths of your glassy eyes, he sees a fractured scene — playing against the scope of your iris, as the movie reflects off your pupils. there’s a turmoil there, a sadness, one that has you covering your mouth with the front of your knuckle. and you’re crying.
satoru wants to tease you. he wants to lean over and purr against the shell of your ear, poke fun at you for being so emotional. such a little baby. what else is he supposed to do?
the tricky part is that he can’t. he can’t move, can’t shape his voice into a purr, can’t even speak. he’s frozen in place like a bug trapped in amber, stuck to his seat, unable to do anything but blink at you in what he thinks might be bewilderment.
his breath hitches — and that’s all. 
something about the sight of you makes him falter, makes him stop in his tracks. catches him off guard. he doesn’t know what to do, doesn’t recognize the feeling stirred deep within his chest, something discomforting and foreign. doesn’t understand why his heart feels so itchy, all of a sudden.
then your eyes meet.
and you blink. once, then twice. eyes just a little wide, an embarrassed kind of surprise. he thinks you must be flustered, and he’s proven right when your gaze flees from his.
a mingle of words clog up at the base of his throat. say something, say something, say something. but he doesn’t know what. 
he wets his lips, preparing to part them, but before he can get the first syllable out you're leaning in. close. close enough that he feels your breath ghost against the shell of his ear, close enough that his heart starts skipping the way it always does when you press yourself against him like that’s where you belong.
a whisper. it’s small, hushed, a little frail. but there’s something else, too, laced together with the vowels — amusement. 
”you didn’t tell me this was a sad movie.”
a pout plays at your lips, as you murmur your grievances. but then there’s that amusement; it’s there when you pull back, in the crinkle of your sparkling eyes, the curve of your smile. 
and satoru’s shoulders relax. stiffened bones melting. he exhales a breath he had no idea he was holding, and his heart feels at ease. a grin finds it’s way to his lips, wide, teasing, cheshire and sweet. 
he leans a little closer, bumping his head against yours. gently. ”i think you’re just sensitive, baby.”
his teasing is rewarded with a little huff, as your elbow meets his side. soft. everything you do is soft. 
”oh, shut up,” you scoff. smiling. he’s so relieved that you’re smiling. 
a moth to a flame, following his instincts, satoru brings you closer. an arm around your waist, pulling you into his orbit, until you’re practically sharing seats. searching for your hand — and he finds it, intertwining his long fingers with yours, just to give it a little squeeze.
(for some reason, he feels more protective than usual.)
he feels your gaze. questioning, maybe. but you melt into him quickly, with your head slumped against his shoulder, and his heart settles back into a sleepy rhythm. just watching the movie pass you by.
the dim lighting of the theatre casts a hazy shadow over your face, a tender desaturation, and his eyes stay glued to it when you aren’t looking. the smell of popcorn hangs heavy in the air, salty and buttery, warm and sweet, and he’s almost grateful to feel that familiar boredom tug at his veins.
anything is fine. anything is better than that discomfort, that irritating itch. 
satoru watches the movie flicker by, scene by scene, whispering commentary into your ear and stealing your popcorn with a satisfied hum. chuckling when you whisper-shout at him to cut it out!
he tries not to think of the glittering tears at your lash line, and almost succeeds.
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rain clouds, cups of chamomile, and frustration.
it seeps out into the open air, engulfing your living room in a feverish haze. thick and suffocating; the scent of heavy rain, lukewarm tea, and that ugly, ugly feeling underneath his skin.
it pulses. it itches. and oh, how it aches.
satoru hates it. he hates feeling angry, feeling upset — hates when either of those emotions are in connection to you. hates it, hates it, hates it more than anything.
he does everything he possibly can to avoid it; his eyes are keen, always have been, and he can see when that thin line he shouldn’t cross crawls a little too close for comfort. when the rubber band of your patience just snaps. he sees all your buttons, knows which ones not to push. he knows you.
and, more importantly, more than anything — nothing you do could ever make him angry at you. 
(well, at least that’s what he thought.) 
satoru’s anger is a fickle thing, controlled, kept under wraps. it’s a slow process; it simmers, boils, a cup of chamomile brewed too long. and then it all but invades his senses. it never gets the best of him, never, but right now he can feel it — little pinpricks against his skin, a frustration that stirs his guts and has his eyes going cold.
satoru towers over you, like this. full height on display. not slouching or draping himself over furniture, but standing tall, and proud, and menacing. he isn’t smiling, and that’s all you need to know that he’s upset with you. his eyes are layered over with discontentment. 
a sigh spills from his lips, a little gruff, unmistakably annoyed. it slices the silence of the room in half, and a shiver travels down your spine. he doesn’t notice it. his voice has a rough edge to it, something firm. something that doesn’t sound like it could come out of his mouth at all.
”don’t act like such a child.”
a flinch. or maybe more like a jolt; this time, he notices, but it’s too late. he’s in too deep, boiled water licking at his ankles, pulling him down. frustration nips at his skin, and he can’t quite seem to push it away.
and you’re just so, so unaccustomed to it. unaccustomed to seeing him wear anything but a smile, unaccustomed to that cold gaze, usually nothing but warm and fond when it meets your own. this isn’t like him.
it’s not like him at all.
swallowing thickly, you do your best to calm down. but before you can make any attempt to contain it, wetness begins to gather in the corners of your eyes. pooling, little droplets yearning to fall.
satoru notices them instantly. he sees that sad glimmer, framed by the murky darkness seeping in from beyond the curtains, accompanied by the symphony of pitter patter against the windowpane. tears, much like the rain beating down outside.
and his chest goes cold.
a tiny sniffle pushes past your lips, and the dam inside you begins to break — tears tripping over your lash line, rolling down your cheeks. cascading across your pretty face. the air fills with a sense of dread, and both of you seem to be thinking the exact same thing.
(oh, fuck.)
satoru notices, belatedly, that his throat has gone dry. that his heart feels itchy, again. it itches and itches but he can’t do anything to soothe it, and your tears continue to fall. 
his heart begins to crack. right down the middle, like a gash in the reflection of a puddle, right across his chest. it hurts.
an inhale, then an exhale. you’re still trying to keep it all together, grasping for control over your emotions, but it’s not going too well. the little breaths that escape your throat are shaky at best, hands trembling as you wipe the tears away with the front of your wrists. and your voice sounds a little like it’s about to crumble away. 
”sorry,” you squeak, taking a step back. there’s a silent panic in the gesture, one that makes satoru want to get down on his knees. ”i’ll just — i’ll leave —”
he wants to stop you. he needs to stop you. but he does nothing, nothing at all, even as you stumble out. leaving the haunting echo of tiny sniffles and tear-stained cheeks behind you. 
satoru just stands there. once again, the sight of your tears seems to render him completely helpless. useless.
and he's frustrated, honestly. frustrated by the argument, by your tears, by his own guilt. he’s so frustrated he wants to claw his eyes out. he scratches at his forearm, but it does no good. all he can think of is your frightened little expression.
(he scared you.)
satoru slumps down on the couch, head in his hands, running rough fingers through his soft hair. it’s unruly by the time he’s done, and his bottom lip is bruised with teeth marks, and everything in the world feels so meaningless. so out of tune.
(he made you cry.)
a sigh. drawn out, tinged with exhaustion, bitter and battered like the swing of a baseball bat. he feels a little like he could throw up. it’s foreign, this emotion, suffocating. how long has it been since he genuinely felt this kind of shame?
the crack in his heart grows deeper, while you’re gone. more severe. every moment you spend outside of his vision makes him falter more and more, makes his desperation grow. desperate to plead for your forgiveness, to convince you not to leave. to wipe the tears away from your cheeks, delicately, the way you deserve. but he can do nothing but sit there, useless, repeating the same old phrase inside his mind.
he’ll make it up to you.
and when you finally come back, having calmed down a bit, he does just that. you’re embarrassed, he can tell, a little meek. it makes him feel that discomforting emotion, again, that ache. the crack that only ever seems to deepen.
but he covers it all up with a smile. a little sheepish, more than a little forced, but he hopes you understand. hopes you can see his remorse, see a man who loves you, because he does. 
so satoru takes you into his arms, softly, hands finding the small of your back. delicate, protective. a little whisper spilling from his lips. 
”’m sorry, baby. i didn’t mean it.”
and it’s not enough. he knows it isn’t. but he does what he can — even when it just ends up clumsy, teasing, bordering on something that most would interpret as insincere. all he can do is coddle you. shower you in hugs and kisses, gifts and praises. he hands it out like candy, eager hands finding yours, everything spilling out of his chest all at once. 
there’s a desperation to it that isn’t lost on you.
but it works. he’ll make it up to you; he swears. and he dotes on you until you’re too embarrassed to be sad anymore, apologizes until his throat runs dry. until he’s sure you believe him. 
he brews you another cup of chamomile, stirred to perfection, warm enough to make up for the shiver he sent down your spine. the rain beating down on your windows serves as a constant reminder of his failure, and satoru does his best to ignore it. swallowing what’s left of his frustration, focusing on you.
anything to see you smile again. anything to wash away the red tint to your eyes, the puffy skin beneath them. anything to hear you laugh, to get you to feel safe around him again. 
(anything to make him forget the sight of those tears rolling down your cheeks.)
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panic, panic, panic.
it’s all he can feel, all he can think, the only emotion his muddled mind can cling to. he’s in pure, sincere, genuine panic, and you aren’t saying a thing. can’t bring yourself to.
arms wrapped around his waist, tightly, you hide away in the crook of his neck. clutching the fabric of his shirt, burrowing your face deeper into his warmth — and you’re not just crying.
you’re downright sobbing.
satoru knew something was off the moment you fell into his embrace, suddenly, tackling him into a hug so desperate it left him reeling. a kind of desperation he isn’t used to, from you.
he knew something was wrong. 
he knew even before he heard it; your choking sobs, those shaky, heaving breaths. muffled into the cotton of his shirt, his uncertain arms around you.
they break his heart.
”hey, hey…” there’s a soothing lilt to his voice, awfully delicate. sweet like molten honey, almost enough to hide the panic. ”what’s wrong?”
satoru holds you to his chest, safe and secure, cradling you protectively. as if shielding you from the world — from whatever or whoever got you like this. as if you’d crumble into dust, otherwise.
he tries to calm down, but his mind is spinning like a broken clock, and your silence doesn’t help. you’re trying to respond; he knows you are, but you just can’t get the words out. any attempts only make you cry harder.
a shake of your head is all he gets — and it’s not much, but satoru’s learned to make a lot out of a little. 
so he continues to hold you, hiding his worry, tucking his anxiety away somewhere you won’t be able to see. he curses, inwardly, grasping blindly for conclusions — for some divine guidance. how is he supposed to deal with this?
(how long has it been since he felt so very useless?)
gentle. that’s the approach he takes, finally, hiding his nervosity. he rocks you back and forth, just a little, like he’s lulling you to sleep; his warm hands finding the small of your back, the back of your head. cradling you so close you hear his rapid heartbeat by your ear.
soothing whispers. murmured into your hair, so soft they seem to melt once they slip from his tongue, all honey and devotion. affection so palpable you taste it in the air, from the breaths he exhales. 
”it’s fine. i’m here, i’m here… i’ve got you.”
he doesn’t know what he’s doing, not really, but it seems to work. because you calm down, after a while, just sniffling into his neck and letting him soothe you. sobs and unstable heaves, turning into whimpers and shaky breaths. clinging to him all the while; so desperate for comfort, for him.
it makes him feel so, so desperate to protect you, to wash every single one of your worries away.
it’s unbearable, this aching desire. like a great, insatiable, unnamed something deep within the caverns of his chest, clawing at his ribcage, snarling and hissing, itching to break out so it can open its maw and devour you both.
(it’s ugly. it’s grotesque. it wants to keep you safe so badly it might kill him for it.)
a coo. sad, dripping with care, a comforting tone that he hopes you’ll find soothing. he smooths his palm down the back of your head, heavy, doting. it hurts so much to see you hurt.
”my baby….” satoru exhales, a little shaky. but he smiles, and he hopes you can hear it, hopes it’ll help mend the pain in your chest. ”what’s got you this upset, hm? you're worrying me, here…”
a broken sniffle. the guilt eats at you, gnaws at your bones, and all you can do is hide away in the crook of his neck. apologizing, your voice no more than a tremor of a breath.
”’m sorry…”
and satoru thinks his heart shatters. he can practically hear the crash, feel the broken, useless little pieces dig into his skin.
his arms travel down to your hips, steady, and he lifts you up. just for a second, just so he can plop down on the floor with you in tow — keeping you snuggled into his neck. seated on his lap with your legs around his waist, like you’re his baby koala.
”shh, it's okay,” he soothes, a grounding rumble of his chest right by your ear. he’s got you enveloped, wrapped up in his buzzing warmth, and all you can feel is him. ”you’re okay. no matter what it is, i'll take care of it, alright? you can rely on me.”
a moment passes. 
satoru clears his throat. nervous, suddenly. ”you know that, right?”
all you can give him is a shaky nod, but it’s enough. he sighs, in palpable relief, still rubbing circles into your back. ”okay,” he sneaks a hand underneath your shirt, tracing little shapes into your bare skin. ”good.”
he isn’t sure how long you spend there, on the floor, entirely focused on comforting you. washing away all your sadness, with every gentle caress, every soothing murmur of there, there… every little stutter of his heartbeat next to yours.
and when you’ve finally calmed down, melting under his touch and into his skin, arms going lax around his neck — satoru takes a breath. collecting himself, so you don’t have to. acting like his heart isn’t still a mess of crushed glass.
”you okay now?” he coos, drawing absentminded hearts into the skin of your back. his voice is teasing, but warm, spilling from his tongue and into your ear. deep and smooth. ”almost gave me a heart attack, baby.”
he feels the way your grip around him tightens, just a smidge, and he hears the weak little breath you draw in. your voice is still shaky, and it makes him want to rearrange the world, stitch those broken vowels back together. 
(he doesn’t like how irrational it is, this insatiable something. how it makes him want to bend the rules of the universe, just to see you smile. a dangerous temptation.)
”i’m sorry,” you croak, clinging to him like a shipwreck to a shore. ”it’s not — not a big deal, ’m just…” 
satoru pulls back. just a little bit, making sure your arms and legs stay in their rightful place, curled around his neck and waist. making sure the two of you stay connected.
then he pinches your cheek.
”don’t apologize,” he quips, a playful frown on his face. soft, a vague furrow of his brows. like he’s scolding you. 
it makes you wince, your eyes downcast. you look so meek. a little like a kicked puppy, glassy eyes glancing up at him in search of comfort.
satoru clicks his tongue. ”and don’t look at me like that, either.” 
he boops your nose, playful, doting, and you exhale weakly. it’s small, more breath than a real laugh, but you’re almost smiling, and —
it’s a start. it’s something.
satoru coos, voice dripping with warmth, sickeningly sweet. it seeps from his fingertips when he cradles your cheek in his palm, rubbing circles into the puffy skin beneath your eyes. there’s a mirth in his own, crinkled at the edges, tucked into that blue shade, something glazed over with pure adoration.
”there’s that smile.” 
he leans forward, closer, to press a kiss against the bridge of your nose, eyelashes fluttering. tickling your skin. you fall further into his embrace and he makes no move to resist, wouldn’t do it even if he physically could. even if he had the strength to let you go.
then he broaches the subject. hesitant. tactful, careful, delicate — he tries to remember how it works. how to handle something fragile. he thinks of those boxes you carried last week, little porcelain cups. heavy in his arms. he thinks of the way you jab his side with your elbow; gentle, always gentle, even though there’s never any need.
he thinks of you, and it all comes easy. that’s how it always goes.
”wanna talk about it?” he asks, softly. fingers treading through your hair, scratching softly at your scalp. it makes you melt, a little. clearing your throat.
”it’s nothing, really,” you mumble, tiny, seeking respite in the warmth that seeps from his body. speaking with a raspy voice, a hoarse throat, all tired out after crying. ”nothing big, anyway…” 
a moment passes, before you continue. ”i guess it's just been a rough week,” you admit, a sigh slipping from your lips, tinged with pure exhaustion. ”just little things piling up. ’m okay now.” 
a hum. satoru clears his throat.
”anything i can do?”
(please let me help.)
but you only shake your head. ”you’ve already done enough,” you assure him, leaning into his touch. ”think i just needed to get it all out, y’know?”
a beat. an itch. satoru holds you tight, a little tighter than he should. gentle, he reminds himself. but he needs you close enough to feel the flutter of your heartbeat, close enough to delude himself that you’ve merged together. closer isn’t close enough.
he gnaws at his bottom lip, teeth sinking into the flesh. pulling words out from the back of his throat, uncertain. ”i’m always here,” he settles on. ”if there’s anything you need, come straight to me. okay?”
a frown plays at your lips. you’re silent, for a while, until he hears you mumble beneath your breath.
”i don’t want to bother you so much, though…”
”— it’s not a bother.”
the words spill into the air, a little more firm than he meant to sound. but he means them.
”i’m serious. if you ever need help, with anything, come find me. i’m yours,” satoru inhales, deep, his chest moving in tune with the breath. you’re carried along with it, as if being lulled to sleep, following the steady pattern of his lungs. 
then he exhales. in, and out, and with it comes a promise. ”if anyone makes you cry, i’ll get rid of them.”
he says it casually, so casually that you assume it’s a joke, a bout of breathless giggles pushing past your lips. the sound has his own curling up, and he doesn’t have the heart to correct you. has enough tact to know that this might not be the best moment to let you know that he’s honestly a little terrified of how far he’d be willing to go to keep you safe and happy. 
but you’re smiling, finally, laughing. and that matters more than anything. when he closes his eyes, he thinks he can even feel the telltale signs that his heart is picking itself back up, gluing jagged shards into a shape that resembles you.
"that's scary!” you gasp, amusement bubbling up inside your throat. ”you’d go to jail for me?”
satoru huffs. ”bold of you to assume i’d get caught,” he tuts, a smug smile on his face. it makes you giggle, again, and he feels like a god.
”okay, okay,”  you nose at his neck, breathing him in, strawberry lotion and laundry detergent filling your senses. ”please don’t kill anyone on my behalf, though.”
”no promises.”
”satoru…”
slowly, steadily, his heart begins to stitch itself together. it helps that you’re there, he thinks. helps that you’re pressed up against him, that you’re holding him, like he’s the safest thing in the world. like you trust him.
(the word tastes like molten honey and luscious berries, sickly-sweet on his tongue. he gulps it down hungrily.)
it’s healing. the weight of your arms around him, the breaths that brush against his neck. he holds you to keep you together, intact, to keep himself together. a shipwreck and a shore — he just isn’t sure which one of you is which. but your jagged edges fit just right with his own.
”i don’t like seeing you cry.”
you blink. gazing up at him, with a contemplative look in your eyes. it melts into something a little too close to guilt for his liking. shame.
”— but i still want you to let me see you like that.” satoru smiles, with a tilt of his head. snowy tufts of hair falling across his face. ”is that weird?”
a moment passes. then you hum.
”no,” you exhale, a little breathless. smiling, somewhat weak, but still enough to have his heart skipping a beat. ”i love that about you, satoru.”
”huh?” he gapes at you — blinking dumbly. ”love what? that i want to see you sob into my chest?”
”that you try,” you stifle a yawn, sleepily nuzzling into him, all tuckered out from crying. ”even when it makes you a little uncomfortable.”
satoru stills. 
silence fills the space between you. there’s nothing more to say. his tongue isn’t really cooperating with him, anyhow — all tied up. so he leaves a kiss on the top of your head, and doesn’t say a word about the tremor running through his chest. 
he hates seeing you cry. hates how powerless it makes him feel, how useless. hates the fact that he can’t always protect you from the world, from himself.
but you let him see you like that.
he thinks of your tears, crystalline and glassy, like translucent marbles on a summer shore — and sees the trust instead of the sorrow. he thinks of your tearstained face, meek and feeble, and knows it’ll always be enough to break his heart to pieces. 
he thinks of you, and tells himself that it’s worth it; just as long as he gets to bring that pretty little smile back to life. 
#jjk#satoru#omg i am so excited i finally got to this ari 🥹🥹 and an x times kind of fic too oh my heart!!!!!!#oh he’s soooo into you 🥺 how his gaze always gravitates towards you i am sOOO my heart is SOOO#‘lives and die by it’ PLSSS reading this is like reading it thru rose tinted glasses!!! his rose tinted glasses!! like a movie in a haze 🥹#your writing is always so incredibly descriptive ari and i love love love that because it paints the scene so so well!!#it describes his emotions so well too — the part on him watching your tears is so pretty ‘crystalline & dew-drawn’ HOW PRETTY#the way the movie reflects on your irises — i love that image so much!!!! its such a vivid picture#satoru not knowing what to do when youre near; his emotions going haywire UUUGH forever a fave concept#and WHEN HE SPEAKS WKNDJEJD I THINK URE JUST SENSITIVE BABY HELLLLLOOOOOSUSJDJISJSJS#‘everything you do is soft’ MY GOSH that’s SO CUTE#anything is better than that irritating itch :((((((( GAWSH i love him#i LOOOOOVE the little descriptors at the start and how they set the mood for the scene omg love love loce#comparing his anger to a cup of chamomile??? oh my god i LOVE that how it simmers and boils omfg ari ur mind#and an angry satoru? oh my god take me tf out LOL IDK iF I CAN TAKE THAT LMAO#slicing the silence in the room into half is an AMAZING description ari omfg#‘dont act like such a child’ MY jaw DROPPED oh my god ari if he ever said that to me id actually cry#that oh fuck is so so loud and i love love love how you described that scene ari omg its so vivid and i could feel his and the readers#emotions thru it !!! i wish i could copy paste it properly but im rdg from my phone rn so 🥲#the idea that he hurts when you hurt is sooo oh my god im such a sucker for that and i think its so true!!#because as much as youre unaccustomed to him acting this way; he’s just as unaccustomed to treating you like this too :((((#oh my god him biting his lips to death :(( everything is meaningless . out of tune :(#see a man who loves you because he does :((( WAAAAH ILL SAWB RN#:(((( it makes him want to rearrange the the world & stitch those broken vowels back together HOW PRETTY#the sheer panic he feels at you sobbing bc he just doesnt know what to do#oh god :(( he thinks of you when he wants to handle you gently :(( bc thats all u rlly are :(( gentle :((#and its insane omg how kinda crazed u can feel he is abt u too. how uve managed to write in the extent of what he’d do just for y#i love the lil banter after 🥺 how he tries to keep things lighthearted still bc thats him!! thats satoru!!!#that dialogue is so tender ‘i dont like seeing u cry but i still want you to let me see u like that’ UGH i love that#:((((( and its that act of. he doesnt like it but he’ll brave it for u!! i love that line of him knowing that itll break his heart
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sanemistar · 3 months ago
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i won’t let you go — satoru gojo
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contains ★ satoru x gn!reader, established relationship, angst to fluff, petnames (baby, love, babe, etc.), 1k wc. ノ requested for my milestone event.
event m.list ★ jjk m.list
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ever since you and satoru have started dating, you heard a lot of gossip and side talks from people around you about how he's never been faithful to any of his past lovers, how he lets them go after less than six months, saying that he no longer finds them interesting, that he's done being with them, how he's never truly loved and probably never will be able to love anyone. that he's a selfish man who's nothing but a player who toys with people's hearts then tosses them away when it's all over. and you’re no exception, as it’s only a matter of time before you meet the same fate as them.
he'll let you go and forget about you as if you two have never met, because satoru gojo is incapable of loving anyone.
however, you pay no attention to these words. and even if what they say is true, you still refuse to believe that it's anything but mere nonsense. and decide to fully trust satoru like you always do.
because the satoru you know and love, the man you're dating right now, your loving boyfriend, is deeply and madly in love with you. the way he kisses you ever so passionately, how he whispers the sweetest of love words to you all the time, and how he holds you in his arms tightly every night as you doze off to sleep listening to his heartbeat. no way he's leaving you, is it? you're certain of that. after all, he's promised that he'll always love you, that he'll never leave your side no matter what, that he'll never let you be alone without him. because he can't live without you.
he finds comfort in you, you're his home as he claims. and you feel the same way about him, you can't live without him either.
although, you try your best to brush these thoughts off. you can't help but wonder if it's true that he'll let you go the same way he did with the ones before you, that he'll break all these promises about being together forever.
unaware, you let these thoughts consume you as you slowly drown in sorrow.
your head starts spinning as you begin imagining the moment he breaks it down for you that he's leaving, that he no longer wants to be with you, that he's done with you. and your stomach is instantly clenched in a knot. you feel a painful pang in your heart as it gets heavier and heavier by the second.
just when you’re about to get completely lost in your thoughts, you feel a soft touch on your shoulder. you turn around and it’s none other than satoru. he cheekily smiles at you, but his cheerful expression quickly changes into a concerned, panicked one the second you start crying.
“…toru.” you sniffle as you start sobbing uncontrollably, hot tears begin to overflow out of your now red eyes like how water flows from an overfilled cup. he rests his hand on your cheek, his thumb caresses your skin delicately as he leans in. he presses feather like kisses on your face and eyes, gently kissing your salty tears away.
“why’s my baby cryin’? what’s wrong, love?” he questions, his tone is a mix of tenderness and concern. a worried look is shown in his ocean blue eyes, it pains him tremendously seeing your teary eyes and sad face, he simply can’t stand it.
you blink, eyelashes wet from crying so much. and you pause momentarily, hesitant to let the words come out of your mouth.
“i just… thought about you possibly.. leaving me alone and..” you utter in between your sniffles, lips slightly twitching. satoru doesn’t let you continue and cuts you off mid sentence.
what you don’t know is, satoru needs you far more than you need him. you're the only one who loves him for who he is as just an ordinary human and not the strongest, you allow him to be himself freely without any restrictions, he doesn't have to fake anything around you. and most importantly, you’re the one who’s introduced him to love, you’ve shown him what it’s like to truly love someone. so leaving you has never been an option to him. the thought has never crossed his mind, not even once.
"babe listen, ‘kay?” he speaks tenderly as he rests his other hand on your cheek, cupping your face in his big hands as he brings you closer to him. eyes pierced on one another, locked in an unwavering gaze, as if you're staring into one another's soul.
“no way i’m leavin’ you, not now, not ever. so don't think about that anymore, 'kay? we’re stuck together for life." he reassures you, the tone of his voice is so soft and sweet, yet affirmative and serious. he then slightly brushes his nose against yours and it tickles you a little before his hands let go of your face, only to pull you in his arms instead. your eyes widen for a split second before you rest your head gently against his broad, well toned chest. your hands grip the back of his shirt tightly, holding onto him for dear life as you steady yourself listening to his calming heartbeat. his slender fingers delicately run through your hair while pressing a series of quick, loving pecks on the top of your head.
he smiles the moment he feels you relax in his embrace. to satoru, you being in his arms as he feels your warmth against his skin is everything he’s ever needed. as long as you’re here with him, that’s more than enough for him, he doesn’t need anything or anyone else.
“i won’t let you go.” he whispers ever so softly against your ear, his voice rings in your ears like a sweet melody. and you hum quietly, smiling against his chest as your eyes slowly shut in relief. you let yourself trust him once more as his earnest words wash over the little doubts that have been there.
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𝜗𝜚 taglist: @sylusdoll @stunies @itoshivy @hanaeriin @spkyssn @17020 @kalsplace
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strayingawayy · 29 days ago
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the ocean's embrace
...dad! chan x reader with their babygirl with little baby curls where chan makes his daughter meet his first lover aka the ocean. kissies to @hyunebunx bc this idea was entirely hers. i just sobbed and wrote it.
» [love. -wave to earth]«
0:34 ─〇───── 5:07
⇄ ◃◃ ⅠⅠ ▹▹ ↻
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chan carefully sank to his knees in the soft, golden sand, his heart swelling with a warmth that only your little girl could stir. with the gentlest of movements, he cradled her in his arms, her tiny hands clinging to his shirt as her wide eyes traced the endless stretch of the ocean. the waves whispered their timeless song, rolling in rhythm with the heartbeat of the earth itself. the sky above was a painting of pinks and oranges, a perfect canvas reflecting the love and wonder that filled the moment. the air was sweet with the scent of saltwater, and the soft breeze tousled chan’s hair as it kissed your cheeks.
"look, my love," chan whispered, his voice low and tender, his gaze never leaving the horizon, "this is the ocean. it’s big and old and beautiful, and it’s been waiting for you."
your daughter, her dark eyes wide with curiosity, studied the vast, shimmering water. her tiny body leaned into chan’s embrace, her little fingers curling tightly around his shirt as if drawing strength from him. she was hesitant, unsure of the endless expanse before her, but her heart was eager, drawn to the waves before her.
"it’s okay, sweet girl," you whispered softly, brushing your fingers through her curls. "the ocean’s a friend. it’s just saying hello."
chan’s eyes met yours, a soft smile tugging at his lips as he kissed your daughter’s forehead, then dipped her tiny toes into the cool foam. for a heartbeat, her whole body froze, her face crumpling in confusion as the water lapped at her feet. she blinked up at him, her wide eyes searching for reassurance.
"i think she’s a little unsure," you teased, the warmth of your smile matching the tenderness in your voice. "but i think we all are the first time we sea the waves, no?"
chan chuckled, the sound full of affection, his heart in his eyes. "i was nervous, too, but now i can’t imagine being anywhere else," he says, his voice full of nostalgia as a memory reels before his eyes.
you nudged him playfully, a mischievous grin crossing your face. "well, that’s no surprise. the ocean’s always been your first love, hasn’t it?"
chan blinked at you, the playful shock clear on his face. his voice was teasing, yet there was a sparkle in his eyes. "i- no. did you really just say that? in front of our daughter no less?"
you giggled, raising an eyebrow. "i mean, it’s true, right? the ocean was there long before me, always calling to you. a little too loyal, if you ask me. an ex girlfriend if i recall correctly."
chan’s eyes widened in exaggerated disbelief, his mouth forming a dramatic "o." "unbelievable," he muttered, though the corners of his lips twitched upward. "the ocean’s not my ex girlfriend, and i’m certainly not in love with her anymore."
leaning down, he whispered to your daughter, who was still staring at the water with a mixture of wonder and wariness. "right, baby? the ocean’s just a friend. a really big, really old friend."
your daughter, her attention still held by the waves, blinked at her father. and then, with a voice that was as sweet as a lullaby, she spoke, her words so soft and delicate they seemed to belong to the sea itself.
"papa," she murmured, "big...water."
you froze, the world standing still for a breath. chan’s eyes widened, and a smile broke over his face as his heart swelled with pride. he grinned, his face lighting up. "well i suppose big water is one way to put it, sweetheart."
your daughter, still focused on the waves, reached her tiny hand toward the water again, her fingers brushing the foam as if inviting the ocean to come closer. the hesitation was gone, replaced by an innocent curiosity that shimmered in her gaze. through her words, she had already claimed the ocean as her own.
chan beamed at her, his voice full of pride. "that’s right, little one. it’s big. but it’s also beautiful, and it’s always been here, just waiting for you to find it."
you smiled at your daughter, her tiny feet dipping into the cool water, her face alight with wonder. "just like you, sweet girl," you murmured. "you'll be just as big and beautiful as her one day."
your daughter’s smile grew wider, her laughter bubbling up like the ocean itself. she stood, her feet firm in the water now, no longer afraid, but entirely entranced by the world she was discovering. "big...water," she said again, her voice full of awe, her tiny hands reaching out as if she could touch the entire ocean in that moment.
you exchanged a glance with chan, and both of you couldn’t help but laugh, the joy in your hearts reflected in each other’s eyes. "she’s definitely your daughter," you teased, the happiness in your voice undeniable.
chan lifted your daughter into the air, holding her so she could see the waves more clearly. "maybe she’s my first love’s new best friend," he said with a wink, his tone playful, but the affection he felt for both of you clear as day. "but the ocean’s not her first love. she’s my forever."
your daughter giggled, her curls bouncing as the water splashed around her, and the whole world seemed to dance in time with her joy. the sun, now low in the sky, bathed the world in a warm, soft glow, painting the horizon with hues of rose and lavender. in that moment, the ocean, the sand, the breeze…all of it became part of the love you shared as a family.
as you leaned into chan, the rhythm of the ocean mirroring the gentle beats of your heart, you knew this was the beginning of something magical; the first of many memories, and the start of a lifelong bond with the water that had always been a part of chan’s heart.
___
@bluesungology
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hoshigray · 1 year ago
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𝐁𝐢𝐭𝐞 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐌𝐚𝐫𝐤 | ryōmen sukuna
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𝐂𝐨𝐧𝐭𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐬: true form! Sukuna x fem/afab! reader - mosterfucking - double penetration (he got two) - biting - spanking - light choking - mention of blood.
𝐀𝐮𝐭𝐡𝐨𝐫'𝐬 𝐍𝐨𝐭𝐞: a quick something I wrote for Sukuna to take a break from writing a fic + I have jack shit for him in my masterlist, lmao.
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Ryōmen Sukuna is most definitely a biter. There is no need to state this since it is obvious. But imagine him plowing you from behind, watching your ass quake under his erratic thrusts, forcing out choked moans from your writhing body moving to and fro with his. Tears roll down warm cheeks onto the cold cream sheets that cover the futon. Hands grip the material for dear life with every rut to your leaky cunt. And when he smacks the cusp of your ass, a shriek cannot be restrained from your lips. 
Sukuna loves your screams. They please him to no end — a gorgeous tune to his devilish ears. As a sadistic man, nothing gives him more joy during these moments than inflicting pain onto your sweet tiny body forced to accommodate both his girthy cocks. A beast like him is allowed to use you as he sees fit. His little pet. His little toy. Not like you can refuse. Judging by how your body adapts to his dicks inside your holes, it is apparent that you're also enjoying this, too.
Two hands are stationed on your hips to propel you forward to him, and the other two hold your hands behind your back. You're left with nothing to conceal the whimpers and cries that fly out your mouth. He wants to hear it all — the sound of your ass meeting his pelvis, the choked sobs when his black fingertips dent into the depth of your hips, your pants for air as he takes them away. It turns him on so fucking much.
He can’t fight the urge anymore — the sight of your sweaty body quivering under his bow gets him riled up. Your skin, so beautiful and pure, displayed none of his markings from the times before now. Blue eyes narrow to your shoulder, clear of nothing but sweat. Well, he’s just going to have to fix that.
He comes down to your shoulder and sinks his teeth into your flesh. A sharp cry sneaks its way out of you. 
“Eyyahhhh!!! Su-Sukuna, don’t, please! I can’t have any ma— Ahhaahhnn!!”
“Who told you’re in a position to order me, brat?” He gives the mark on your shoulder a slow lick, tasting the twinge of blood to engage his taste. One of his hands snakes its way to your throat to squeeze. Your mind plunging into a deeper haze than before. “Know your place. Don’t stop screaming for me.”
More chews to your shoulders prompt more tears to escape from your strained-shut eyes. And the pacing of his cock becomes unbearably fast for your brain and senses to keep up. The pain inflicted by his demon mouth, along with the tongue from his stomach licking the sweat of your back, coinciding with the erratic tempo of his hips — it’s all too much to bear. And your release hits you hard, your cunt and ass clamping onto his lengths that continue to rut into your now sensitive parts.
“Mmmph, haahhh…Heh, now you think you can come without my permission, huh?” Sukuna whispers dangerously to your ear, and you whine when his teeth catch your lobe. “Such a pathetic pet, aren’t you.” He pistons his dicks deep inside, churning your tender areas to the point of incoherent babbles. “A damn noisy one, too…Hmmgh! Oh fuck, fuck…”
Before he experiences his climax, Sukuna gives the back of your neck one last bite. Your final shriek signals the ingress of his warm load filling your holes. He keeps you pinned to the futon, making sure you stay still for every bit of his essence to enter within you. Your mind is too far gone to try and fight it — too occupied with the feeling of him corrupting your body internally. Just letting him ride out his own crescendo until he slowly dismembers his huge members off of you. Heavy pants are used to steady his breathing, and he examines his messy work on your body. Bloody bite marks, your ass trembling from the onslaught of ruts and slaps, and silent tears trickle down a dazed face. He snickers to himself. 
“Perfect.”
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© 𝐇𝐨𝐬𝐡𝐢𝐠𝐫𝐚𝐲2023 — dividers from @/animatedglittergraphics-n-more
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tender-rosiey · 2 years ago
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even — ryomen sukuna x f!reader
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a/n: ohoho? an argument with husband sukuna? i wonder how that will go ;) fluff ending btw so don't worry
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your life as the wife of the king of curses is far from the normal married life. your husband is not like most. you knew that. he is different, rougher than your childhood tales of a prince charming.
he is sharper, grumpier, and grouchier. it was all part of the package and you knew all of that.
but, you can’t help but wish for a moment of tenderness between you and him. and while you know that sukuna shows his care differently, you also want to feel the softer side of his affecton.
that’s why when you overheard the maids talking and gossiping about your marriage, your heart was filled with fury, but most importantly sadness.
they talk about how he will eventually get bored and that your fate has been destined since the moment you entered the palace. it also doesn’t help that there are times when sukuna is a tad bit rougher and angrier.
he tends to not take it out on you, but sometimes, you’re there in the wrong time.
such as today.
after a particularly rough day, you slam the door of your chambers behind you. your chest feels tight and the kimono feels far too suffocating to keep on, especially since it reminds you of him. you clumsily take it off and throw it on the bed and get into your silk robe.
you take multiple deep breaths as you settle down on your bed, trying to calm down.
though, the calm is short-lived as your husband bursts through the door, a deep scowl on his face, “what’s up with you?”
he is met with silence which aggravates him more, and he growls, “I am sure what you did isn’t something you do to the king of curses who is also your—“
“what do you think of me?”
and for the first time, in this moment, his eyes meet your own. yours are filled with pain and faux confidence, with a hint of fear. it reminds him all too much of your first meeting, and he doesn’t like it. he thought that your fear of him became a thing of the past. it makes him uneasy.
but sukuna’s perceptiveness is nothing to take lightly because when he concentrates, he notices that the fear isn’t from him but what he will say.
and it snaps him back to reality and the question you ask. but he still doesn’t answer it. instead, he quirks an eyebrow, confused, “huh? what the hell are you talking about?”
you stand up slowly, silk dragged behind you as you walk towards your mirror. you’re playing with your ring quietly before you ask, “what do you think of me?”
“you should know that,” he retorts, a hint of annoyance in his tone.
“well, I don’t,” you smile, but it doesn’t reach your eyes.
his feet take him to you, his arms crossed, “do you think I would marry just anyone?”
you seem to have reached your limit as you finally look him in the eyes with anger brimming in your irises. you snarl at the man in front of you, “what if it was a marriage of convenience? what if it was something to shut the world up with? to make me submit?”
he seems taken back, but you give him no chance to reply as you continue, “the maids talk and talk about how you don’t care, and I ignore them I really do!”
anger laces your voice as you roughly push a finger to his chest, “but when you do things like what you did tonight, you make what they say all sound true!”
“you push me away, you pull me back,” your tears start to well up, “all at your own leisure, and I can’t handle that! I want you to care, but with so much happening—I…”
your tears are falling down your face; panic and pain lacing your voice as it gets louder and louder, “I can’t help but think that you don’t truly like me, let alone love me!” you press on, “do you even like me?”
your breaths are ragged and heavy. your eyes are puffy, red, and strained. you slowly sit on the ground and pull your knees closer, sobs escaping your throat. you’re unware of the man who walks towards you then kneels in front of you.
you’re wiping your tears frantically, but they never stop. sukuna frowns.
he then silently takes your hand into his and raises it to his forehead. his eyes are focused on you as he utters the following words, “If I gave you the necks of those who speak nonsense to you,” he raises a brow, “will you be sure then?”
your breath is caught in your throat and you can’t formulate a response. he sounds serious and you know he is. you recall all the times he, without hesitation, killed for you.
but, right now, you truly can’t help but think about how the moon shines behind your husband, contrasting and illuminating his reddish pink hair.
while you’re lost in your own thoughts, sukuna has enough of your silence and bites down on your finger lightly, “so?”
gasping, you pout and snatch your hand back, “hey! what was that for?”
with a roll of his eyes, he pulls you closer by the waist then his hand travels to the back of your head. he rests his forehead on your own before speaking up, voice absolute, “you’re my queen, and I will cut the head of anyone who speaks ill of you.”
“and…” his thumb gently swipes at your tears, “I don't want to see you cry like this,” he grumbles, looking away, “so stop it; it’s annoying.”
a smile creeps up your face and a giggle escapes your lips, “you love me that much?”
he groans before getting up and leaving you on the ground. he goes to rest beside the window and you giddily follow suit. his hand, almost by instinct, pulls you towards his lap. after sitting, you tilt your head to look up at him with a cheeky smirk, “aww, you love me!”
he pushes your face into his chest, muffling your voice. he mutters as he looks out the window, “don’t push it.”
you smile against his skin, because if he thinks that you can’t feel the kiss he placed on the top of your head then he is sorely mistaken.
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do not copy or plagiarize or you will be reported
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pucksandpower · 1 year ago
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That Pretty Head of Yours
Max Verstappen x Reader
Summary: sometimes your thoughts get too loud for your own good but Max knows exactly how to quiet them
Warnings: depictions of anxiety
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The hotel room is quiet except for the low hum of the heater. You sit curled up on the couch, knees tucked to your chest, staring blankly at the muted TV. Max is in the bedroom, unpacking his things after the race today.
You should be helping him, but you just can’t seem to move from this spot.
Your mind feels cluttered, thoughts racing with no direction. A heavy anxiousness sits in your chest, making it hard to breathe. You try to focus on the colors flashing across the silent screen, but nothing can hold your attention for more than a few seconds.
You’re spiraling, caught up in your head with no escape. The emptiness inside you threatens to swallow you whole. You press your forehead against your knees, wrapping your arms tighter around your legs.
“Schatje? Are you okay?” Max’s voice cuts through your mental fog. He comes over and crouches down in front of you, grey eyes filled with concern.
You give a half-hearted shrug, not meeting his gaze. “Just … thinking too much, I guess.”
Max frowns, cupping your cheek with one hand. His touch is warm, comforting. You lean into it despite yourself.
“What’s going on in that pretty head of yours, hmm?” He asks gently. His thumb strokes over your skin.
You sigh, closing your eyes. “I don’t know. My thoughts are all over the place. I just feel … empty. Anxious." You hate admitting weakness, but Max has always seen right through you.
He makes a sympathetic noise, leaning in to kiss your forehead. "I think I know what you need.”
Before you can ask what he means, Max moves to sit on the couch. He tugs you into his lap so you’re straddling his legs, pressed close against his solid frame. One hand cradles the back of your head while the other splays across your lower back, holding you firm.
You relax into him instinctively, comforted by his nearness. He’s so warm, so real. Already the knot in your chest starts to loosen.
“There we go,” Max murmurs. "Just focus on me, liefje. I’ve got you."
He guides your head to rest in the crook of his neck. You breathe him in, surrounded completely by his scent and touch. The rest of the world falls away until there is only Max, anchoring you here with him.
His hand strokes up and down your back slowly. “Talk to me.”
You exhale shakily. “I just … everything feels kind of pointless right now. Like I’m drifting without purpose. And I can’t turn my brain off, it just goes in circles thinking the same useless thoughts over and over.”
Max makes a sympathetic noise, pressing a kiss to your hair. “I know, I know. Your mind can be cruel like that sometimes. But I promise you, none of those thoughts are true. You are so loved, Y/N. So incredibly loved.”
His words make your eyes prickle with tears. You cling to him tighter, overwhelmed.
“Shh, it’s okay,” he soothes. “I’ve got you, baby. I’m right here.”
Max begins to rock you gently, one hand coming up to stroke your hair. The tender motion unravels you completely. A sob hitches in your throat as you finally let go, crying quietly into his shoulder.
He doesn’t shush you or tell you to stop. He simply holds you close as you let it out, fingertips massaging your scalp.
When the tears finally subside, you feel wrung out … but also lighter. The weight has lifted from your chest. You nuzzle against Max’s neck, breathing him in.
“There’s my girl,” he says softly. “Feel a little better?”
You nod, wiping your eyes as you sit back to look at him. "Yeah. Thank you."
Max cups your face in both hands, gazing at you intently. “You never have to thank me for taking care of you. I’ll always be here when you need me. I love you.”
Your heart swells, warmth flooding your entire body. No matter how many times he says those words, they never fail to make you feel like the luckiest person in the world.
“I love you too,” you whisper.
Max gives you that crooked smile that makes your knees weak. He leans in, catching your lips in a tender kiss. You sigh against his mouth, hands coming up to clutch at his shoulders.
The kiss remains unhurried, full of comfort and care. When Max finally pulls back, he brushes his nose against yours.
“Now then, I think some cuddles are in order,” he says, patting your thigh. “Go get comfy in bed. I’ll join you in a minute.”
You can’t help but smile as you climb off his lap. Max always knows exactly what you need, even when you don’t. The promise of being wrapped up in his arms, warm and safe, already has the last of your anxiety fading away.
You change into one of Max’s oversized t-shirts, then slide under the covers on your usual side of the bed. The silky sheets and plush mattress cradle you invitingly. You snuggle down with a contented sigh, letting your heavy eyelids drift shut.
The mattress dips as Max gets in behind you. His solid chest presses up against your back, one arm draping over your waist. He nuzzles the back of your neck, breath tickling your skin.
“Comfortable?” He asks.
You lace your fingers with his, bringing his hand to your lips for a soft kiss. “Very.”
Max hums in satisfaction, holding you a little tighter. The steady rise and fall of his chest lulls you into a tranquil headspace. Here in his arms, nothing can touch you.
For a while you just lay together, soaking up each other’s warmth. Max presses lazy kisses along your shoulder, up your neck, behind your ear. Each one sends a pleasant tingle through you.
“Talk to me some more?” He says after a bit. "Tell me what you need right now, liefje."
You consider for a moment, absently stroking your thumb over his knuckles. “Just … remind me that I’m yours. That you’ll keep me safe.” Your voice comes out small, timid.
Max makes a soothing noise, nuzzling into your hair. “Of course, sweet girl. You’re mine. Only mine. And I will always, always keep you safe.” His hold on you tightens protectively. “No one will ever hurt you as long as I’m here. You’re so precious to me, so loved. My perfect girl.”
You can’t help the little whimper that escapes you, his words settling like a balm over your frayed nerves. Max continues whispering sweet nothings as you melt further into him, tension bleeding out of your muscles.
Here, cocooned in his warmth with his voice surrounding you, the last dark tendrils of anxiety stand no chance. There is only Max, your harbor in the storm.
You drift in a state of blissful tranquility, floating somewhere between sleep and waking. At some point Max begins humming softly, the vibrations rumbling through his chest. Combined with the fingers combing lazily through your hair, it lulls you into a deeply relaxed state.
“That’s my good girl,” Max praises. “Just rest now, I’ve got you.”
You succumb willingly, sinking into the welcoming arms of sleep with a contented sigh. The last thing you feel is Max’s lips pressing one more tender kiss to your temple.
“Sweet dreams, my love.”
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xenteaart · 6 months ago
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you are not difficult
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pairing: chan x reader (i wrote it with idol!chan or producer!chan in mind, but it can fit any au, really) word count: no idea but it's short genre/warnings: er, angst, hurt/comfort, implied suffering w depression, implied history of SH. also implied shitty ex. so PLS keep that in mind before you read. also, it's all good in the end. author's note: it's a self comfort thing y'all but i hope you like it too.
it was yet another night where everything felt too much and you kinda hated yourself for it. bad day, maybe some hormonal imbalance due to a certain time in your cycle, history of mental illness — it's hard to put a finger on the exact cause. you're sick of trying, anyways.
chris was, of course, right there for you, and as you were falling apart in his arms, your entire soul was aching so bad that it made you want to crawl out of your own skin. it's usually like that, everywhere in your body like some sort of extreme inflammation, except physically you're perfectly fine.
"'m sorry…" you blurt out somewhere between your sobs and cries, still unable to hold eye contact with him.
"baby, you have nothing to be sorry for," chan shakes his head and keeps rubbing circles into your back, just between the shoulder blades where the ache feels the most excruciating.
"kiss me?" you squeak. almost pathetic, honestly, but it's always been your way of checking, whether he still wants you. whether he still loves you and desires you, even at your lowest, even with your mascara all smudged over your cheeks, eyes puffy and red, lips slightly irritated and swollen. even when there's a gaping black hole where the heart is supposed to be.
chris doesn't even question it, really. he simply leans in and gives you a long sweet kiss full of both a partner's tenderness and a lover's lust, so, so willing to do whatever it takes to calm the thunderstorm inside your mind and ease your struggle.
the kiss doesn't really satisfy you, the feeling is still there.
"sorry," you whisper again as you breathe out into chan's lips but the intimate contact doesn't last long. chris frowns and makes some distance between you two to look into your eyes.
"why? baby, why do you keep apologizing?" he sounds gentle but still slightly frustrated.
"i dunno? cos 'm difficult? for bein' difficult?"
there's a silence as he blinks a few times, processing and putting two and two together.
"just because it was difficult for them to love you and take care of you, doesn’t make you difficult. you are not difficult. like, at all," he puts on his serious tone, the one he uses for you when you can't see the obvious and he has to remind you.
you don't really know what to say to that, so you keep playing with the tissue paper in your hands, ripping it apart piece by piece just to keep yourself busy and focused on something other than the burning ache in your chest.
"dealing with mental health isn't easy, that one is true, baby, but it's so easy to love you. you are easy to love. even now, looking so small and in pain but it's still you, and my duty as your boyfriend is to take care of you when you can't. and, hell, you're one of the most capable people i know, so please just let me hold your hand through it once in a while, yeah?" chan speaks slowly and quietly, as if to make every single word sink in, tenderly forcing it into your stupid lovely brain that refuses to cooperate sometimes.
chris feels safe. he feels like lighting up a cookie scented candle after a long day at work. he's the feeling of the ocean timidly licking at your feet and burying them deeper into warm wet sand. chris is the first sip of coffee in the morning and the cold side of the pillow at night. he's everything worth living and trying for.
"thank you," is the only thing you manage to say, but in the way you lean back into his embrace he's able to read a lot more.
"do you want a nice mug o' hot chocolate and some fairy bread, baby?"
this question makes you hiccup and sob once again. you nod and nuzzle closer into the crook of his neck.
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cactus-cuddler · 2 months ago
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"No one loves me"
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☆ Pairing: Natasha Romanoff x f!reader
☆ Word count: 1,4 k
☆ Warnings: there is explicit sex scene!
☆ plot: reader had a bad day and Natasha help her to forget her thoughts
☆ Author's note: I had a bad day so let me write something trash. Rybka= bunny
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Today felt like the weight of the world had been dropped onto your shoulders. Work was a disaster—nothing went right, no one seemed to appreciate your efforts. At home, arguments with your family left wounds you couldn’t quite ignore, and your friends… they felt like strangers. No one reached out anymore. No one seemed to care. The silence was deafening, like a heavy fog that refused to lift.
Even your usual coffee break with your best friend felt different. The comfort of your routine was gone, replaced by an unspoken tension. The air between you was thick, charged with an unnameable distance. You wanted to ask, to bridge the gap, but words felt futile. The ache of it all sat in your chest, tightening with every passing minute. By the time you got home, you felt like you didn’t belong anywhere—not with your family, not with your friends, not even in your own life.
When you stepped through the door, Natasha was there, her piercing green eyes softening the moment they landed on you. 《Hello, Rybka,》she said gently, her voice laced with concern. 《What’s wrong?》
The question was your undoing. You didn’t answer. Instead, the tears you had held back all day flooded out, and you stumbled forward, burying yourself in her arms. You clung to her like she was the last solid thing in a world that was crumbling around you, your sobs tearing through the quiet of the room.
《No one loves me anymore, Natasha,》 you choked out between gasping breaths. 《My best friends... it’s like they don’t even know me. My family—things just keep getting worse, and this job—God, I hate it. But we need the money, so I keep going back. I’m so tired. So, so tired.》 Your voice cracked, the words spilling out like they had been waiting to escape for weeks, maybe months.
Natasha didn’t say a word at first. She just held you tighter, one hand stroking your hair while the other rested firmly on your back, grounding you. Her warmth seeped into you, a balm for the rawness of your pain. She waited until your sobs quieted, until your breathing steadied just enough for her to pull back and look at you.
Cupping your face in her hands, she gently wiped your tears away with her thumbs, her touch as tender as her gaze. 《Don’t say that,》she murmured, her voice soft but steady. 《You are so loved. Even when it doesn’t feel like it, even when everything feels wrong, you are not alone. Do you hear me?》
You shook your head weakly. 《How can you say that? When everything—everyone—feels like they’re slipping away?》
She leaned closer, her forehead pressing softly against yours, her nose brushing against your own. 《Because I know you,》she whispered. 《You are the kindest, most selfless person I’ve ever met. You give so much of yourself to everyone else that you forget to leave anything for you. That’s why it feels like this. But it’s not true. It’s not.》
Her words pierced through the fog in your mind, and for the first time all day, you felt a flicker of warmth—of hope.
《And your job,》 she added softly, her hands still cradling your face, 《if it’s breaking you, we’ll figure something out. I don’t care about the money. I care about you. We’ll make it work, okay? Until you find something that makes you happy, we’ll manage.》
You started to shake your head in protest. 《But last month you had to give up the gym,what if》
Natasha silenced you with a soft, knowing smile. 《I don’t care about that, Rybka. You are my priority. As soon as you find something you want to do, go for it. Promise me.》
You nodded, her words sinking in like a lifeline. She pressed her forehead to yours again, and the closeness of her was overwhelming in the best way. Slowly, your lips met in a kiss so soft that it stole your breath.
《Do you want to forget about everything for a while with me?》 Natasha whispers, her voice low and warm, sending a shiver through you. You don’t need to answer with words—your nod is enough. She takes your hand, leading you to the bedroom, where she gently helps you lie down on the soft sheets.
Her fingers trail over your skin as she slowly removes your clothes, revealing you inch by inch. Each newly exposed part of you is greeted by her lips, leaving a path of wet, lingering kisses that set your body alight.
《You’re so sweet, my little Rybka,》 she murmurs, her tone dripping with hunger and adoration. Her hands worship every curve, every line of your body, and when you’re left in only your panties, you instinctively help her undress. The sight of her toned, flawless figure makes your breath hitch. On your knees, the two of you collide, mouths devouring each other, hands exploring, claiming.
Your fingers sink into the firm flesh of her hips, leaving crescent-shaped marks behind, while she teases your sensitive breasts through the fabric of your bra. Your nipples harden under her skilled touch, and the heat between your legs becomes unbearable, the damp fabric clinging to your aching core. The desire for her tongue to explore you, to claim you fully, is all-consuming.
She lays you back down with a knowing smile, her hands peeling away the last barrier between you. Natasha’s fiery hair spills over her shoulders as she leans down, her mouth finding its way to your most sensitive spot. A single finger slips inside you, firm and deliberate, as her eyes lock with yours, studying every gasp, every flicker of pleasure on your face.
Her tongue dances over your clit, her lips wrapping around it in ways that drive you wild. The room is filled with the sound of your desperate sighs as her movements grow more intense, more purposeful. She slides a second finger inside you, her tongue focusing relentlessly on your clit until you’re trembling uncontrollably. When your release finally crashes over you, your cries fill the room, and Natasha savors every moment, her lips glistening with you, her eyes alight with satisfaction.
As you lay there, breathless and flushed, thinking it’s over, Natasha stands and walks to the drawer you both know all too well. Your heart races as she straps on a purple toy, her gaze never leaving yours. Slowly, she beckons you with a finger, and you obey, taking her in your mouth.
You wrap your lips around the strap-on, your eyes locked with hers, your tongue swirling over the smooth surface. Natasha’s breathing quickens, her hands tangling in your hair. 《You’re so good with your mouth,》she praises, her voice thick with arousal. When you spit on the toy, a teasing glint in your eyes, she groans, unable to contain her excitement.
She doesn’t waste a second, guiding you to bend over the edge of the bed. Her hand lands on your ass with a sharp slap, and the sensation sends a jolt of pleasure through your body. Then, with one firm thrust, she fills you, her movements deep and deliberate. Each stroke ignites the fire within you again, building a second orgasm with devastating speed.
Her fingers find your clit once more, circling it with precision, and the combination of her touch and her thrusts pushes you over the edge. Your cries mingle with hers as the waves of pleasure consume you both.
Exhausted, the two of you collapse onto the bed, your legs tangled, exchanging soft kisses and playful touches on each other’s thighs. You trace small, lazy patterns on her skin, basking in the intimacy of the moment.
《Did I help you forget your day?》 she asks, her voice tinged with amusement as her fingers brush your cheek.
You smirk, your breath still uneven. 《Now that you’ve reminded me, you’ll have to fix it again.》
Her grin turns wicked as she shifts, straddling you and pressing her warm, slick core to your lips. 《Then let me help you forget all over again,》 she says, her voice low and commanding. Natasha knows exactly how to make the world disappear.
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amathslutsguidetofandom · 10 months ago
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Imagine modeling some lingerie you just bought and this is Bucky’s reaction to it🤭❤️‍🔥
Beautiful As Always
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PAIRINGS: James "Bucky" Barnes x Girlfriend!Plus-Size!Reader
WARNINGS: Smut, fingering, slight exhibitionism, insecurities (reader is sad about having thick thighs and a pudge), Praise. (If I have missed anything, please feel free to let me know 😊)
WORD COUNT: 1,081
*not proof-read*
ENJOY!
"I'm don’t know, Bucky," you murmur, gently twisting and turning within the confines of the dressing room, where only a thin curtain separates you from your beloved.
"Don’t know ‘bout what, doll?” Bucky's voice drifts from the other side, a comforting presence in the midst of your uncertainty. Your fingers graze over the delicate lace of the high-waisted undergarment, and pinch at the soft pudge of your belly.
"It's just... I don’t know," you confess softly, a weight settling in the pit of your stomach. As though summoned by your doubt, a cascade of insecurities begins to flood your mind, each one more relentless than the last.
Do you really look like that? God, are you really that chubby? Has Bucky seen all of this? How can he really love you when you look like this?
A stifled sob escapes you as tears blur your vision, and you clumsily brush them away. At the sound of your distress, Bucky draws back the curtain and steps inside.
"Doll?" His voice is tender as he closes the curtain behind him, his hands finding solace on your trembling shoulders as he gently turns you to face him.
The colour on Bucky’s cheek grows red at the sight of the supple weight of your breasts sitting against the lace of the bra. The allure of your exposed thighs proves to be a distraction, making it difficult for him to focus on the matter at hand.
You observe the way his gaze traverses your body, a glimmer of admiration shining in his eyes.
Yet, your mind interprets it as disdain.
"I look awful, don’t I?” you whisper, casting your eyes downward and biting your lip in apprehension. The monsters within your mind seize control, enveloping you in a suffocating embrace.
Bucky is taken aback, crouching down to meet your gaze. "What did you say?" he murmurs, tenderly cupping your face in his hands.
You push his hands away and turn back to face yourself in the mirror. “I look bad, Bucky,” you shake your head and fold your arms around yourself trying to make a shield, covering your form from your man’s gaze.
Bucky shakes his head and steps in front of you, “Why would you say that, doll?” Surprise and concern seep into his tone. You just shake your head and shrug, “I don’t know.”
-----
“Repeat it. C’mon, doll, tell me. Tell me who’s pretty.”
Bucky’s unwavering thrusts make you spiral further into your realm of pleasure. His fingers rub furiously at that spot inside of you, making you grip onto his forearm as he keeps you locked in a headlock.
“Didn’t hear you say anything, doll. Want me to stop, huh?” His fingers halt, and you whine at the general loss of your euphoria. “Bucky, baby, please,” you whisper, squeezing your eyes awaiting him to continue.
Bucky clicks his tongue, “I didn’t hear what I wanted to hear, doll.”
You try to use the last remaining of your energy to comb through your mind as you try to find what Bucky wanted you to say, and you finally retrieve it.
But you don’t want to say it.
Because you can state a fact if it isn’t true.
“Bucky, I can’t,” you slouch against him, your back fully pressed against his. He makes eyes meet yours through the mirror and you shy away from his gaze.
“Doll, how many times do I have to say that you are one of the most gorgeous women I’ve ever seen? You have made me feel ways I never thought I was capable of feeling. You made me feel loved,” he says softly, like the whole world has to stop in order for him to say those words.
“Who tells me that my scars look like stars when I start hating them?” he asks.
“I do,” you whisper back, and he kisses your temple.
“You do, sweetheart,” he says against your forehead.
"Doll, I don't give a damn about a little extra cushion. You're soft and smooth, and that's what I love about you. Your cuddles feel like home, and it blows my mind that you'd ever doubt how amazing you are. To me, you're everything. Your curves? They're just more of you to adore."
Speechless, you really don’t know what to say.
You knew that Bucky loved you, but at times when the demons had the upper hand, you doubted that love he had for you.
Now with him, in this dressing room, you slowly feel yourself get the upper hand from those demons. You slowly start to feel like you actually do deserve the love this man absolutely showers you in.
“I’m beautiful,” you whisper, but slightly cringe. Bucky sees this and nods slowly, understanding your hesitation. “It’s okay, doll. Say it, say it. You are beautiful,” he slowly starts to move his fingers again, and you inhale deeply at the sensation.
“I’m beautiful,” you say breathlessly, holding onto his forearm for dear life as he starts rubbing your button harder. “Fuck, Bucky. Yes!” You dig your teeth into his forearm, preventing your screams from being heard by the world outside of the dressing room.
“Say you're worth it, doll. Tell me that you deserve this,” Bucky harshly whispers into your ear. You see him through the reflection of the mirror and whimper when his other hand brushes against your clothed nipple and pinches it hard.
He smirks and whispers again, “be a good girl and tell me, doll.”
You moan, “I’m worth it, Buck. I’m worth it.” Bucky smirks and nods, “Good girl, so proud of you.”
You grind against his hand and babble nonsense against his arm. You feel the wave of pleasure reach the edge, and your legs start to quake.
Bucky chuckles as you finish with a squeal that’s barely muffled by his arm.
“There’s my pretty girl,” he says and turns you to face him.
You try to cower away, but Bucky already has his fingers on your chin and is gently forcing you to look up at him. You moan as he lewdly sucks on the remaining juices on his fingers.
He looks down at your body and the set you're wearing, “who’s beautiful?”
Your lips turn up a bit, “me.”
Bucky nods, “that’s right.” He kisses the tip of your nose, “My pretty girl.”
You place your hands on his chest, “yeah?” You slightly smile, your demons slowly evaporating and leaving the caves of your mind.
Bucky nods.
“Beautiful as always.”
💌💌💌
PHEW! Here you go, my lovely @sergeantbarnessdoll
Finally got this done, this has been sitting in my drafts for a while (with my other WIP's).
Hope you lovelies like this!
Feel free to let me know how much you enjoyed it!!!!
Till' then,
Stay Coquette-y,
Anya 🫶🏽🕊️🎀
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wh0reforcoriolanussnow · 1 year ago
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a childhood sweetheart of coryo turned couple classmates yet the games began and she saw coryo fell in love with lucy, went to district 12 and returned empty handed with a cold heart
and how she was there to welcome him back and accept him wholeheartedly, allowing him to use her through his rise at becoming President.
"you dont love me anymore and thats okay but at least you dont love her as well. at the very least use me until im nothing of value to you. because thats how i love"
Use me || Young!Coriolanus Snow x reader
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A/n: anon you're so creative....
Warnings: reader smoking, manipulative snow, mention of infidelity, suggestive, if there's anything else lmk
Wc: 1,075
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Divider by @firefly-graphics
Flashback
"What's on your mind, my love?" You gently sweep a stray strand of his blonde locks away from his face. His chest still rapidly rising and falling from the previous activities.
Coriolanus' gaze gravitates toward you as you gracefully rest on your forearm, the strap of your nightgown sensually slipping down your arm. Coryo delicately corrects it, gracing you with a warm smile as your eyes intimately connect with his.
"Nothing, everything's alright," he dismisses, his gaze returning to the ceiling. You release a quiet sigh, opting not to probe him further.
You shift to turn to your side, your back facing Coryo as you hear him quietly sigh. Unexpectedly, his arm envelops you, drawing you against his warm chest, his lip delicately grazing your ear.
"I love you. I will always love you, y/n," he murmurs, prompting a tear to cascade down your cheek in response to his sudden confession. Part of you embraces his sincerity, while the other clings to lingering doubts.
As the 10th Hunger Games approached, the air buzzed with anticipation. Tributes were selected and the Games began, and with that, you noticed a shift in Coriolanus. His tribute from District 12, Lucy Gray, seemed to capture his attention in a way that sent ripples through your once idyllic romance. His eyes, once filled with tenderness for you, now held a distant, searching look.
-
"Tell me, Coryo, did you cheat for Lucy Gray?" Tears welled in your eyes as you stood before him, arms crossed, while he gazed back with a vacant expression. His silence hung in the air.
You took his hand in yours, bringing it up to your cheek. "Please, just tell me, I could help you, my parents can help," you pleaded, wanting to know the truth. "I'm sorry, I'm so sorry, y/n," he murmured, shaking his head and retracting his hand as you stifled a sob.
Coriolanus, caught in the crossfire of ambition and newfound desires, struggled to articulate a response to your question. The once unbreakable bond as childhood sweethearts you shared seemed to fracture under the weight of the Games and the allure of Lucy Gray. He left, leaving you with unanswered questions and a heart heavy with uncertainty.
As the Games progressed, whispers of Coriolanus's involvement in cheating echoed through the Capitol's corridors. The ambitious student found himself banished to District 12, a harsh consequence that would permanently alter the course of his life. The Capitol, ever hungry for scandal, eagerly awaited his return.
~
End of Flashback
When Coriolanus comes back, the triumph that should define his return is replaced by the chill of defeat. Empty-handed and with a heart grown cold, he stands before you, a mere shell of the boy you once knew. Yet, true to the loyalty that defines your love, you are there to welcome him back.
"Coryo," you whisper tenderly, the rapid click of your heels announcing your silent approach. His eyes have yet to meet yours, but you surprise him with an unexpected hug, shattering the quietude around you. The warmth that once enveloped him dissipates, leaving only a haunting emptiness in its wake.
You could feel it in the way his arms reluctantly wrapped around you, the embrace forced and lacking the familiar back rubbing that used to accompany such moments. Lifting your head, you locked eyes with his cold and reserved gaze.
With a furrowed brow, you withdraw, clearing your throat before cautiously inquiring, "How are you?" He scoffs in response, his retort cutting through the air, "I've been living in the districts. How do you think I am?" his words spat out with a harsh bitterness.
You nod slowly, taken back at his outburst. "Sorry, that was insensitive of me. Forgive me," you murmur, your eyes fixed on the slender points of your heels, catching a mumbled and incoherent response from him.
"It's fine," though the contradiction between his words and tone is palpable. "Now, shall we go? I've had a long day." Coriolanus massages his forehead as you nod. "Of course, the car is waiting outside," you move your feet.
"Y/n, wait," he calls out as you pause in your steps, turning around to face him. His arm extends, an unspoken invitation for you to link onto it, and you feel the corners of your lips turn up momentarily.
Your family's wealth and influence worked as a shield, protecting Coriolanus from the harsh judgement of Capitol society. It was an unspoken fact that you and Coriolanus would be together no matter what happened.
As the months pass, Coriolanus's political ambitions soar, fueled by your family's wealth and connections. Your role transitions from a lover to a silent supporter, your love an offering laid at the altar of his ascent to power. Your heart bears the scars of unspoken pain, but you wear a façade of unwavering commitment.
So, you play your part. Standing by Coriolanus' side as he maneuvers through tricky Capitol politics, him as the youngest President of Panem, and you as First lady.
In the quiet moments, away from prying eyes, you try to break down the high walls of ice he has erected around his heart since his arrival back in the Capitol. But every attempt to rekindle what was lost seems to fall on deaf ears. The specter of Lucy Gray lingers, an unspoken presence that casts a shadow over your attempts at reconciliation.
~
"How many times have I told you to stop drinking so early in the day," Coryo's harsh words boom through the corridors of the lavish presidential mansion, his footsteps getting louder by each step.
You discreetly roll your eyes, a skillful concealment, as he forcefully snatches the posca glass from your grasp. The resounding slam of the glass meeting the table fills the room with an echoing punctuation.
"Coryo, it's Sunday, for goodness' sake," you implore, tilting your chin downward. Your eyes, slightly blown out, fixate directly on him, and a smirk graces your perfectly painted lips.
His gaze carefully explores the contours of your face. Your habit of indulging in the luxurious of alcohol at any time, in any place, has left its mark on you. "Get dressed, we have visitors soon," He says through gritted teeth, his fingers harshly holding your chin up.
"Of course, Coriolanus," You push his hand away, standing up quickly causing you to bump into his shoulder. Coryo's hands bawl into fists as he watches you walk away, he ought to have a talking to you for using his full name.
Coriolanus was not surprised at how quickly you managed to sober up and act like the proper lady you were. It was something Coryo admired about you, how much you prioritised your image and duty.
Luncheon went by a breeze, Coriolanus' hand never leaving your thigh during the entirety of it. The mask of Capitol perfection never failing to falter. However, the emotional toll of playing the dutiful partner while witnessing Coryo's heart slipping away, became increasingly unbearable.
Later that evening, your feet led you to his office. The speech you had rehearsed replaying in your mind, a plea for acknowledgment, a desperate cry for the remnants of the love that once defined your connection.
You lift up your knuckles to the wooden doors, hesitating for a moment before your knuckles make contact with the door. "Come in," You hear his voice call out as you let out a breath before stepping in.
Coriolanus arches an eyebrow in your direction, his gaze then drifting to your left hand where a cigarette delicately hangs between your manicured fingers. "You know how much I hate it when you smoke in the house, especially in my office," he remarks, reclining in his seat, an annoyed expression on his face. Undeterred, you challenge him by taking a deliberate, long drag, keeping eye contact intact.
"Apologies, husband, but you're well aware of how smoking has a peculiar way of soothing my nerves," you quip, casting him a wry smile before strolling towards the window. With a deft motion, you open it, allowing the tendrils of smoke to gracefully exit the room.
Coriolanus scrutinizes you, attempting to decipher the enigma you've become, though he acknowledges that his once-sharp ability to read you now lies dormant, lost during his time away from the Capitol. "Do you have something you want to say? I'm rather busy right now," he states, his gaze glued to scattered papers, while you, tapping your foot with impatience, await acknowledgment.
"Sit, if you want," he gestures nonchalantly, his eyes remaining steadfast on the sprawl of papers before him. You gracefully settle into the plush leather chair, crossing your legs as you stub out the cigarette.
"You don't love me anymore, I know you don’t, and that's okay," you said, your voice steady, your eyes fixed on the man who had once been your everything. "I've learned to accept it," you add, a note of acceptance in your voice. Coriolanus visibly freezes, his attention finally torn from the paperwork, as you wear a satisfied smile, relishing the impact of your words. "But at least you don't love her as well."
"At the very least, use me until I'm nothing of value to you, because that's how I love." Coriolanus, a complex tapestry of emotions, looked at you with a gaze that betrayed a mixture of regret and resolve. The reality of your words, the stark admission of your willingness to be used for the sake of a love that had long lost its luster, hung in the air.
"I never wanted it to be this way," he said, his voice carrying the weight of the choices that had led them to this moment. You refrain from letting out a scoff, "But it is," you replied, a bittersweet smile playing on your lips as you get up, walking around his desk to place a hand on his shoulder. "I'm at your disposal, Coryo. You know that, don't you?"
The words hung in the air, a silent acknowledgement. Yet, the hunger for power had consumed him, and your sacrifice became a mere footnote in the narrative of his ascent.
As the years passed, you became a shadow in his political theater. Your influence and wealth were tools in his rise to power, your heart a casualty in the ruthless pursuit of his goals.
Your sacrifices, both seen and unseen, were the foundation upon which his legacy was built. Yet, the hollowness in your heart grew, a testament to the silent agony of a love that had withered in the shadows of power and ambition.
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godhandler · 4 months ago
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Cottagecore life with Sukuna, who’s already packing his bags out the suburbs as you paint a picture of blue-green countryside idyll amid the mountain grass carpet, warm hearthstone, and sweetfish fresh from the stream. 
“Pick your favourite.” He scoffs at your delighted face. He won’t show you how much time he spent planning the whole thing: a surprise trip to a sheep ranch. Your laugh warms a blush all through his tan skin. “We’ll take it with us.”
A quick peck of gratitude later, you spend your time examining through the bleating herd. Cloud-balls brush past your knees. You decide on a youngling: fat little candyfloss on stubbly legs, a few weeks old at best. You’re already planning on the barn you’ll make for him– watch him grow up into a spoilt old ram. 
Sukuna, hanging back against the fence, rustles your hair as you return with your baby in your arms.“Good choice, looks soft too.”
“He is!” You pet his little head as he nuzzles into your neck, already taking to you. “His name’s Yuuji, I’ve decided, it’s perfect for him!”
“I’m not gonna call the pest that.”
You two walk back to your car, strapping your new pet into the backseat the best you can. The journey back to your homestead is pretty short anyway. “You’ll start loving him in no time, I tell you. C’mon, just call him by his name once!”
………..
“You don’t like it, brat?” Sukuna is confused seeing the tears in your eyes. Is it the smoke from the sizzling dish? Or were you not feeling meat-ish today? The lamb has been roasted to perfection, he made sure of that, topped it with your favourite lemon-cilantro too! “I’m even calling it ‘Yuuji asado’ instead of ‘cordero asado’.” 
“My baby…” You reach out to touch his now-crispy skin. 
Sukuna’s a bit hurt– you didn’t even try it once before reacting like that. Sukuna might not be a very experienced cook, but he actually followed the recipe to a T, putting his heart and soul into the dish to make you happy. On top of that, you did pick the lamb out yourself, so there’s no reason for you to be so ungrateful. 
Still, he carves out a leg, pouring extra garlic oil onto your plate, and forks off a bit for you to taste. You don’t want to hurt his feelings. You take the bite he’s offering. 
Yuuji. You’re sobbing now. You’re heartbreakingly delicious.
“Do you … like it?” His first culinary attempt: He just wants you to appreciate his efforts. 
“It’s the best lamb ever, baby.”  It’s true. Well-marinated meat, so tender you could tear it with your lips. Juicy on the inside, the flavours seeping through and through. You can’t even pretend that you don’t want another bite. “Tears of happiness, don’t worry about it.”
“Damn right.” His smile is back to cocky again, having conquered the art of the kitchen. “Play nice and I’ll make it again for you next week.”
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a/n: this happened to me. I was 7. dad's side of the family yk.
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msmk11 · 13 days ago
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Not Worth Your Tears
Harry Potter x fem!reader
WC: 843
CW: allusions to people being bitchy and judgy
Summary: Afternoon plans with people you know don’t go according to plan, leaving you upset. Good thing you have a lovely boyfriend to comfort you.
A/n: definitely not based on true events (except I don’t have a harry to comfort me)
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The door shuts with a thud, the decisively unpleasant noise the perfect ambience for your current mood. You slide off your shoes and kick them into the growing messy pile- one you and Harry swear you’ll clean up but never do. You hang your keys on the hook and let your bag slump off your shoulder. You feel terrible, a heavy heart weighing down your chest, but don’t want to let your sweet boyfriend see. He’s sitting on the couch in the living room, the perfect picture of comfort in one of his favorite hoodies and matching sweatpants. The rugby game plays from the tv and Harry is watching it intently. At the sound of your footsteps into the kitchen, however, his gaze instantly falls to you.
“Hi baby! How was lunch?” he asks sweetly.
Maybe you’re just imagining it, but he sounds extra hopeful and positive today. You know he’s excited to hear about your lunch. Though you suppose he’s always excited to listen to whatever you have to say. It breaks your heart, then, that you don’t have good, exciting things to share.
“It was good,” you say, refilling your water bottle in the kitchen. Your voice is tighter than you like and you cringe.
“Everything okay?”
You should’ve known he’d clock you instantly. No matter how hard you try, you cannot hide your feelings from Harry. So you don’t bother. As soon as you turn around and see the comforting, loving face of your boyfriend a sob escapes you. His pretty features morph from mild concern to distress, and he bolts up from his seat pulling you into his arms.
You wrap your own around him tightly, shaking in his hold and crying aggressively. Harry runs a hand up and down your back soothingly.
“Did something happen at lunch?”
“Mhmm-“ you hum, nodding your head.
Your boyfriend guides you to the couch to sit down, his comforting embrace never weakening despite the movement. His green eyes gaze into yours tenderly, “wanna tell me about it?”
You take a shuddering breath and only get out a syllable before you choke on another sob.
“Shhh, it’s okay. Take your time baby. And try and take some deep breaths for me.”
Harry makes soothing circles on your lower back as you cling to him tight. His steady breathing and faint cologne calms you a little and you’re able to take a deep breath.
He kisses your hairline, “good job, sweetheart.”
“I-it’s just. I felt so out of place today,” you confess, “like I didn’t belong.”
Harry’s heart shatters into a million pieces and his hold on you tightens, “did someone say something? Or do something?”
You sniffle as a few stray tears continue to make tracks down your face, “not exactly. It’s just. They-“
You hiccup.
Your boyfriend presses another tender kiss to your hairline encouragingly.
“It was just so obvious that they- that they thought they were so much better than me. They- they’d speak to me but it was like they were…. talking down to me.”
Harry’s jaw ticks in anger but he keeps it to himself, instead focusing on you, “I’m sorry that happened, baby. People are just plain arrogant and mean sometimes.” He kisses your head once more as he traces patterns into your arm, “but you know it’s not true, right? That they’re better than you. Because they’re not. In fact, you’re ten times better than they could ever be.”
“I- I know they’re not better than me. It’s just,” you look down at your lap, “it’s really dehumanizing, to be seen as less than because of some absence of an ‘it’ factor, or wealth or something.”
Fingers brush against your jaw and your chin is raised so that you’re looking Harry in his eyes again, “sweetheart, I know. I get it. The Dursleys were like that too. It really sucks, and kills your confidence. But just remember they’re not worth these tears baby.”
He places a kiss to your forehead, “you’re so pretty,” a kiss to the tip of your nose, “and smart,” a kiss to your cheek, “and kind,” then the other cheek, “and witty,” and a kiss to your lips, “and the best girl I know.”
You’re a flustered mess by this point and it makes Harry smirk in spite of the emotional situation.
“I think you’re obligated to say those things,” you murmur, playing with his free hand.
“Only my heart obligates me to say it,” your boyfriend answers thoughtfully, “it bursts with so much love for you that I can’t help but say all the wonderful things I love about you.”
You look at Harry fondly, eyes trailing over his dark skin, sharp jawline, and lovely emerald eyes that hold so much love for you. You kiss his cheek gratefully and lovingly.
“You feeling any better?” He asks softly, cupping your face.
“A little,“ you answer with a shrug.
He leans closer, lips inches from yours, “then let me help you, baby. Let me help you feel better and forget those silly people.”
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igotanidea · 8 months ago
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Smooth criminal: AK!Jason x reader
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part 1 : Somebody's watching me
part 2: Run baby, run
Yeah... I know it's been a while. Sorry guys. But here we are :)
***
They say that history repeats itself. That’s its merely a one big circle in which people get lost endlessly, not learning from the past mistakes, instead doing them all over again.
Like an Uroboros, forevermore biting his tail.
And that was how Y/N felt at the moment, shaking over the cup of tea Dick so generously offered her alongside with his hoodie. And even more kindly – not asking any questions of why she showed up at his apartment (or rather under it) in the middle of the night looking crazy.
She was back at the beginning. Back over Jason’s grave, sobbing and shaking while the memories of the news of him being gone forever haunted her mind.
Felt like all her efforts to forget and move on have come to nothing.
“Y/N…”
“No. No please I don’t want to talk Dick-“
“I was just gonna say you can stay here for as long as you like. I don’t know what got you so freaked out, but the Y/N I know – knew­ – was not the one to get scared over a spider or a mouse. So it must have been serious. Stay.” He grabbed and squeezed her hands reassuringly. “I’m serious.”
“No, no it’s too much to ask for—”
“Good thing you did not ask then.” Dick grinned “Cause I believe I offered It myself.”
“You really didn’t change a bit, Grayson. Same golden, sunshine boy.”
“And you’re still the same, not holding back girl. Woman. How long has it been exactly?”
“Two years.” She sighed
“Two years.” Dick sighed too, his eyes becoming a little blurry from the memories. “I missed you, you know. And not only me. So did Tim and Alfred and Damian and I’m sure even Bruce became a little more grumpy without your presence to challenge him.”
“He’s got enough criminals to keep him entertained I believe?”
“Oh, Y/N, criminals he can handle easily, they are no fun. But having a woman with a sharp mind? That’s something Bruce still needs a lot of training in.”
***
 It was shockingly easy to reconnect with Dick.
Or maybe not, given the fact he was always awfully friendly, keeping in touch even with his exes and even having considerably good relations with some villains.
Long story short, in a months’ time she was regularly back in his life and he was back in hers. And much to her surprise, this time it was not a constant reminder of the person she lost, neither filling the void, but rather a soft recollection that she was not the only one who felt the repercussions of Jason being gone.
If anything, after that time apart, it felt like Y/N and Dick’s relationship could finally move past the tragic events and bloom. Not in a romantic sense, because he had Barbara and was making plans in that area, but like a true, deep friendship, cemented with similar feelings.
And she even got the guts to meet with the rest of the batfamily, ditching those girls who left her alone at the party. Slowly, but steadily, she was getting back to her old, familiar self, dropping the act of a girl who wanted to be anything but the version she was when Jason was alive and with her.  She was not running from the past anymore, but rather embracing and accepting it. And that was the real healing.
Only that Jason was not gone.
Observing her carefully from the shadows, watching almost every step, be it himself or using his militia. With explicit orders given to not let her know they were there. He had bigger plans coming, and making the same mistake as before, by coming as close as to touch her, could never happen again. Even if somewhere deep inside, the very subdued part of him screamed for that. For the warmth he remembered and knew would come with tenderness and not pain.
She never gave him anything less but love and devotion.
If anything Jason was only cursing himself that he let her step into the Batman world again. That is was his reckless behavior that drove her back into the arms of people, who were nothing but bad news. Who would eventually end up hurting her too.
And he was going to protect his little, innocent princess from that.
So yes, he was watching.
Sending his goons when he knew she was walking back home from work late, to ensure no one would lay a finger on her.
Causing a commotion in the area that happened to be dangerous only so she would choose another way.
Sending her colleagues threat letters so they would drop the chase for the same promotion at work as her.
Beating up a guy who was trying to flirt with her when she was buying coffee-to-go at her favorite place.
Doing it all smoothly, like a professional he was.
Building up a way to execute his master plan that would keep her safe from any danger, real or hypothetical. Forever.
***
“She got home, boss. Safe and sound, not one hair out of place.” One of his militia officers reported to him
“Good.” Jason only grunted in response. One whole month and he was so close to the finale. The end was right in front of him and he had to hold himself back to not make a single rookie mistake that would derail his efforts.
“If I may, sir, why exactly are we wasting resources on some woman? She’s no one important, just a regular—”
“What did you say?”
If the sinister voice wasn’t enough to make the man stop his sentence, the iron grip on his throat did.
“I- I-“
“No one important? Huh? Was that what you said?” Jason mocked tightening fingers on the man's jugular. “Answer me!”
“I- I-“ he was struggling for air.
“Pathetic!” Jason threw him on the ground, retrieving the gun from his holster, pointing it at the man’s head.
“Please, don’t—”
“I should put a bullet in your head for talking about her like that and second one for questioning my plans.” The gun outlet was now pressing into the man’s temple. “You are doing what I tell you, you hear me? No questions. No doubts. You are here to serve me, unless-“ Jason put a little bit of pressure on the trigger.
“No! No please!”
“You’re a piece of shit.” Arkham Knight muttered, taking the gun away. “But I am feeling merciful today. We can’t have blood on the floor when Y/N arrives. Now go! Get out of my face before I change my mind! And you make sure everything is perfect because if not—” he  caressed the arms with a cruel glint in his eyes, enjoying the way his officer rushed out of the room, throwing commands left and right, halfway out the door.
“Soon, baby… Soon we’ll be back together…” Jason muttered to himself once he was finally alone.
He was so close to having everything he needed.
@vaniasagitaa @gone-batty-fics @astrelz @not-herexo @deans-spinster-witch @calicocat45 @princessbl0ss0m @rosieandthethorns @beingaturtlespiritually @grierpilots @killerwendigo @teenytinytunes
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bookwormjust · 4 months ago
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Altered self-image (established relationship, Cassian’s mate)
You sat at the dining table, poking at the food on your plate with little interest. It had been like this for weeks—your appetite dwindling as your thoughts spiraled into darker places. Every time you looked in the mirror, all you saw were the imperfections: the rolls on the side of your back, the softness of your stomach when you sat, the marks on your thighs. You compared yourself endlessly to Feyre, Elain, and Nesta—how effortlessly thin they seemed, how perfectly their bodies fit into the image of what you thought you should look like.
But you weren’t them. You had curves, and while once they had made you feel powerful, now all you could see were the parts of yourself you wished would disappear. And then there was Cassian—so fit, so muscled, and not an ounce of fat. The warrior everyone admired, the embodiment of strength. How could you stand beside him and feel worthy when you didn’t even feel comfortable in your own skin?
You hadn’t noticed him watching you as you sat there, barely touching your food. But Cassian had been paying attention. He had noticed the way your appetite had waned, the way you pulled back when he tried to wrap his arms around your waist, the way you would avoid looking at yourself in the mirror.
"Are you going to eat that?" His voice broke through your thoughts, and you looked up to see him standing in the doorway, his gaze serious.
You forced a smile, pushing the food around your plate. "I’m just not that hungry."
Cassian narrowed his eyes, the soft concern on his face quickly shifting into something more determined. "That’s not true," he said, crossing the room in a few strides. "You haven’t been eating, and I want to know why."
You felt the knot of guilt tighten in your chest as he stood in front of you, arms crossed. His presence was imposing, but the worry in his eyes softened the sharpness of his stance.
"I... I just don’t feel like it," you said quietly, your voice barely above a whisper. "It’s nothing."
Cassian crouched down in front of you, forcing you to meet his gaze. "Don’t lie to me, love," he said, his voice low but filled with a quiet intensity. "I’ve noticed. You haven’t been eating right for weeks. You’re not yourself."
You shifted uncomfortably, feeling the tears well up in your eyes. You didn’t want to have this conversation. How could you explain that you felt inadequate, that every time you looked at him—this strong, perfect warrior—you felt like you didn’t measure up?
"I don’t look like them," you blurted out, unable to stop the words from spilling out. "I don’t look like Feyre, or Elain, or Nesta. I’m not thin, Cass. I have fat on my stomach, and marks on my thighs, and when I sit, there are rolls on my back. I don’t look like you—fit, strong. And I... I just feel like I shouldn’t eat if I want to be better."
Cassian’s face softened immediately, and without hesitation, he reached for your hands, gently pulling them into his grasp. "Don’t ever say that," he said firmly, his eyes burning with emotion. "Don’t you dare compare yourself to them. You are *you*. You are my mate, and I love every inch of you, just as you are."
You blinked, the tears finally spilling over as the weight of your insecurities came crashing down. "But I don’t look like you," you choked out. "You’re so perfect, and strong, and I’m just... not."
Cassian’s hands cupped your face, his thumbs brushing away your tears as he looked at you with a tenderness that made your heart ache. "I am not perfect," he said, his voice soft but steady. "And I don’t want you to be, either. I love you for who you are, not for what you think you should look like. Your body is yours, and it’s beautiful. Those curves, the softness of your skin, the marks on your thighs—they’re all part of you, and I wouldn’t change a single thing."
You sobbed, the weight of his words sinking in as you buried your face in his chest. His strong arms wrapped around you, holding you close as he pressed a kiss to the top of your head.
"I don’t care what anyone else looks like," he murmured against your hair. "I care about you. And I need you to take care of yourself, not because of how you look, but because I want you to be healthy. You deserve to feel good, to feel strong in your own way."
He pulled back slightly, tilting your chin up so you could see the sincerity in his gaze. "You are not meant to be Feyre, or Elain, or Nesta. You are *you*, and I fell in love with every single part of you. I wouldn’t want you any other way."
You sniffled, the warmth of his words finally starting to settle in. "I just... I don’t know how to stop feeling like this."
Cassian kissed your forehead, his hands never leaving yours. "You don’t have to figure it all out right now. But we’re going to work on this, together. You’re not alone, and I’ll be here every step of the way. And for now," he added with a soft smile, "you’re going to eat. Not because you have to, but because you deserve to treat yourself with the same love I have for you."
With trembling hands, you nodded and picked up the fork, taking a bite of the food in front of you. Cassian stayed by your side, his hand gently resting on your back, comforting you as you took the first steps toward healing.
And in that moment, you knew that with him, you would learn to see yourself as he did—worthy, beautiful, and loved.
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mykingdomforapen · 1 year ago
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Absolutely gobsmacked by the way s2 finale of Link Click humanizes Lu Guang and shatters the 'ice prince' archetype in one fell swoop. Granted, I started Link Click when both seasons were completed so I do not have the more prolonged watching journey as other fans but it just is so interesting to me. Lu Guang for most of the show is so aloof and so unflappable, capable if not seemingly OPed in that his powers have little drawbacks or places to mess up like CXS'. The classic ice prince. Intriguing but altogether an enigma more than a man, dare I say more an archetype than a person.
Cheng Xiaoshi's motivations, tender heartaches, and contraries are revealed plainly in the story. You knew what he wants as a character, why, what would scare him, what would anger him, what mistakes he would make, etc. etc. Lu Guang was such a contrast. He seemed so untouchable. Not shaken by anything. Even when he was stabbed (and rightly shocked by it lol), he was so quickly accepting of it.
Then S2 finale rolls around and SUDDENLY. He is so painfully human. He's in denial. He's terrified. He's grieving. He's selfish. He's desperate. He's isolated. He's so full of love. He is a sobbing wreck and we know that it is true even if we never fully see it (except in those high-res nano-second shots which are such UTTER BRILLIANCE on the art director's part). He is so scared of losing someone he loves that he will do anything to never have it become true, despite being ultimately so powerless to actually have any say in it. We might not all have Cheng Xiaoshi's impulsiveness or sorrows or determination, but how many of us do not have Lu Guang's fear?
Just...the utter genius of making Lu Guang from the ice prince archetype to the most human and relatable character in Link Click in just the last 90 seconds of S2.
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casiia · 1 year ago
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༉‧₊˚. — simon 'GHOST' riley; cooties.
warnings .: x reader, dad simon, afab ! reader, soso much fluff, unedited.
.: masterlist.
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imagine simon’s daughter coming home with tears just running down her face, you’re trailing in behind and trying your best to hide your laugh as you console her.
“it’s just a myth, dear.”
but that only makes her cry harder, because she’s 7 and doesn’t know what the fuck a myth is. who is she supposed to believe…her loving mother who raised her and has never lied to her a day in her life, or the girl she’d met just an hour ago on the playground.
“it’s true!” she gasps out, wiping her wet cheeks with her palms, dramatically dragging her hands down her face as another sob wracked her tiny body.
you could only snicker silently as you brushed away baby hairs that clung to her cheeks. frankly, you didn’t know what to say; you’d tried everything to help your daughter and ease her of this new world ending conflict.
simon’s on immediate alert, normally he’s welcomed home with kisses and hugs and bottomless babbles about pointless things. hearing his baby’s loud cry followed by her quick and urgent footsteps makes him panic and his mind instantly goes to the worst.
hurriedly, simon makes his way down the stairs nearly breaking his neck when he trips over a stray toy — but he manages to grab the banister before falling to his death and peaks into the living room.
you’re sitting on the couch with her cradled in your arms, a tender and gentle shush whispered off of your lips as you untangle knots in her hair. your attempts to calm her down don’t, she’s as stubborn as her father, if not more.
“what’s going on, sweet pea?” simon asks, treading carefully as he inches closer to you, his eyes clouded with a mix of worry and question.
before he can sit down, the girl in your arms shrieks so loud he can hear it ringing in his temple. wincing at the loud intrusion, simon watches as his daughter shoots from your arms all the way across the living room, her back pressed to the wall and eyes wide with what seems to be horror.
now simon’s afraid, is there something on his face? did he forget to shave? is he even simon?
you only snort behind your palm, furrowing your eyebrows and returning back to your playful yet serious expression. “go on, babygirl. tell dad what she said.”
his heart is hammering in his chest now, what did she say — who are you talking about?
and he doesn’t know if that scream altered him deaf but all he can see is her lips moving. the sound of your quiet giggles calms him though, and you have to ask her to say it again.
“she said boys have cootie!” she screams, looking horrified — looking at her dad as if he’d grown a third head and eaten all of her halloween candy.
simon begins to open his mouth to say something, something along the lines of “who fuckin’ told ya that.” although the more he thinks it over he’s compelled to play into the roll. he pauses for a moment, concentrated on weighing out the pros and cons.
on one hand, it breaks his heart to see his girl avoiding him like this. going to the edge of the earth just to distance herself from him. crying out because her world is shattered, her dad? having cooties? what nonsense.
on the other hand. simon’s been hearing about this ‘jack’ boy that she’s been in love with on the playground, he even proposed to her with a fucking stick. his daughter can do better than that. and hell, she’s too young to be dating, she doesn’t even know her alphabet!
so with some quick thinking a small smile paints his lips, he opens his arms and watches as she hesitantly takes a step forward. his heart leaps at that, she’s willing to catch a fake disease of cooties just for a daily hug from her father.
“boys do have cooties, but not me, see this?” he reaches inside of his shirt and pulls out the dog tag that hangs around his neck, he gives it a nice tug and smiles a bit. “it’s cootie-repellent.”
another step, hesitant but slowly the small girl is inching away from the wall and closer to the awaiting arms of her dad. “r-really?” she asks, a hiccup following her shaky breath as she calms down.
simon only nods, he’s grateful that your daughter isn’t one to question much. a hard believer in anything she hears, to this day she still believes that fairy’s live in the freezer. he’s not sure what story he would make up if she began questioning him, maybe something with fairies. they were always his go to.
“y’want it?” simon begins to take the necklace off, holding it out to her. shes just an arms reach away, but she’s curious.
“yes.” she mumbles, her heartbroken expression from moments ago turning into that beaming smile that warms simon’s chest. “i’ll give it to jack!”
simon stills. fuck. no way was he going to lose his girl this soon. “nuh uh.” he laughs, quickly tucking the chain back under his shirt and pulling his daughter into his chest.
you watch as he ruffles her hair, her muffled screams falling onto deaf ears as she squirms and punches her dad, begging for him to let go. simon only tightens his arms around the flailing girl, peppering kisses all over tear stained face, watching her once glossy eyes crinkle with joy at her dad’s affection.
thank god for cooties.
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