#'just because the sheer number of characters and different storylines

[literary-illuminati]

2024 Book Review #43 – Witch King by Martha Wells

Last Hugo (novel) nomination of the year! And I actually read them all before worldcon for once. (Maybe I should actually buy a supporter ticket and vote next year.) Unlike most of the other nominees, I walked into this one with pretty firm pre-existing expectations – I am an absolutely massive fan of Wells’ Murderbot books and so have a generally quite high opinion of her, but I have heard rather mixed things about the book from friends who’ve read it before me (some very positive, others quite harsh). Unfortunately, I mostly have to side with the negative appraisals here.

Well, ‘negative’. The book was fine. If it had been a hugo nominee last year it probably would have been in my top three (happily, in 2024 the competition is much, much tougher). So most of this review is going to come across as very hostile, but to be clear I read the thing in four days or so, it was never offensively bad or anything. It’s just its flaws are most of what seems interesting to talk about as I sit down and think about it.

The book follows Kai, a demon prince left stranded wearing a human body after the passage between the mortal and demon worlds is sealed off. The story begins with him being woken after being imprisoned in an ancient tomb for nearly a year, and jumps between the present day (where he is escaping imprisonment and investigating what happened and etc) and about a generation previously, where he is a key part of the beginning of the rebellion which overthrew the Hierarch's empire and created the world which now seems threatened.

My biggest issue with the story, I think, is that it felt unfinished. Both in the sense that it could have used a sharp editing pass on cutting some fat, and that it only felt like the first third or so of a story. The past timeline is basically the first act (if not the prologue) of a traditional epic fantasy story, while the present day storyline ends in a complete anticlimax, and in any event turns out to be a sideshow to and cleanup of the real actually important plot that had all occurred offscreen before Kai was captured. In both cases there were many scenes where when reading them I was left wondering why this was what the book was spending precious, finite wordcount on.

The comparison I’d draw isn’t Wells’ murderbot books, or even really any traditionally published books at all – it’s serial fiction. When an author is publishing chapters week-to-week, you naturally end up with many scenes that exist because they were easy or fun to write, and the author needed to build themselves up a buffer while they figured out where the story was actually going. Which is frankly just a necessary fact of life in that medium, but far less understandable when you are trying to fit a complete, compelling narrative into 400 pages. I wouldn’t otherwise care about the sheer number of words dedicate to describing seemingly every supporting character’s outfits or the architecture of random hillforts, but as I saw the amount of book left shrink they did start to grate (I would have found the drawn-out-yet-tensionless action scenes annoying regardless).

Which is all very irksome, because there is a very compelling story there – the immortal companion to the heroic rebel, helping him overthrow a cruel empire and establish a new, peaceful and liberated order, only to grow increasingly disillusioned as he watches his friends son try to cement his grip on power and create a new empire in all but name. Pathos, intrigue, meaty character drama! It’s all there! And it just all happens off screen and entirely between the two stories, for some inexplicable reason.

So leaving aside plot, there’s the setting. The book goes out of its way to draw the readers attention to it, with epigraphs at the beginning of chapters lecturing on some bit of sociology or history, and lots of exposition within the main text. There’s a half dozen different cultures and ethnicities with their own naming conventions, political systems, and styles of dress. It’s clearly presented as something impressive – and it just all feels very surface level?

And okay, I am someone who reads an essay series on the economics of premodern wheat agriculture for fun, my expectations in this realm are atypical and probably unreasonable. But, like – this is ostensibly a setting without elves or dwarves or any non-human races besides demons. But the Hierarch’s empire only makes sense if they’re just literally orcs. Crossing an ocean to conquer a new continent seemingly just so you can massacre and depopulate it is not really normal human behaviour! It’s not like they were colonists settling the land, either – it’s explicitly mentioned that much of the continent is just a desolate waste. I kept waiting for some dark wizard ritual or eldritch scheme to explain the why here, but despite repeatedly teasing some secret about their homeland, this wasn’t something the narrative was actually interested in.

The nations of the Rising World Coalition aren’t really as load-bearing to the plot, but still – the idea that there was this whole state system of premodern principalities and republics that had no institutional memory of war kind of beggars belief, and I’m left slightly annoyed that there was a implication-laden conversation about witches being so profoundly weird that they had no renegades because ‘there was nothing to rebel against’ despite clearly having institutional lineages and elders, which was absolutely never followed up on. But all that is admittedly picking out quite tiny nits.

Of more significance is the fact that the societies and politics of the world feel like set dressing for the actions of the dozen or so people who are powerful and Important enough to actually matter, with everyone else helpless against their influence. This is the issue with having a book that wants to be about the importance of doing politics and forging alliances and convincing people of a better way forward, but which has no interest in actually showing what goes into any of that onscreen – so you end up with a prince whose just supernaturally charismatic and persuasive, and a demon who reveals that they already won at court intrigue five years before the story began.

Character interactions are a big part of the real meat of the story, and I leave them for last because I actually do have some nice things to say here. The jumping between past and present letting you see how the relationships begun back then developed and ended up panning out makes everyone’s dynamics very fun (even if doing that you probably could have been a bit less obvious about the foreshadowing in the past too. Bickering reluctant allies to lovers is a fine plot, but if you’ve already revealed they’re going to end up married you don’t need to signpost it so obviously in every single scene they have together in the past too).

By far the most compelling relationship to me was actually the one between the imperial agent who ends up tagging along and helping in the present (who was several decades from being born in the past timeline) and Kai. In large part because there was a real sense of ambiguity and tension there, and subtext that wasn’t instantly dragged up into the foreground.

Anyway, yeah, I probably went into this with expectations too high – but oh boy does it not live up to muderbot.

[asgardian--angels]

Taika and OFMD

thinking about Taika's new interview where he's said the season 2 ending seems like a natural conclusion to the show.

We know that David wrote the season finale the way he did in case it didn't get renewed for s3. And we know that David does have a season 3 storyline in mind, as he's envisioned Ed and Stede's love story as having three acts. And I know that the fans believe there's more story to tell, too, because they haven't resolved their communication issues, their trauma, or lingering plotlines.

The interview mentions that one of the limits on the show's capacity to keep running is Taika's schedule. To me, that may be the biggest holdup of anything when you get down to it. We're so lucky to have had him for two seasons of this show, given just how many projects he has going concurrently. But it gets more and more difficult to block off months of his time - and when looking for a season 3, David is going to need to produce an exceptionally compelling reason to bring him back in again. If Taika believes the show could end where it is, as much as he's adored being on it, he may prioritize other projects.

To me it felt as much of a risk to end s2 on a 'happy ending' note than to end on a cliffhanger, because it leaves the door open for cancellation on the basis of 'good enough.' I get why he did it, and I do think it was the right choice, but still. It makes the season 3 setup harder, because as Taika even said, he wouldn't want a situation where Ed and Stede have to leave their idyllic life behind. Which would have to happen to some extent - pulled back into the fray at least temporarily when the crew needs their help or the larger conflict of the pirates vs the English comes to a head, otherwise there'd be no drama or excitement. And if the storyline was simply Ed and Stede running an inn and having domestic mornings and working out their feelings, that's just not enough for Taika to clear his schedule and sacrifice other potential projects.

I trust David Jenkins to have something in mind that can convince tptb a third season would bring them great ratings and streaming subscriptions. I honestly don't think that's the part of this process that would hold (is holding?) the execs' decision up. Rather, it's whether the premise for season 3 is deemed compelling and necessary enough for our big name actors to sign on and commit their time to. For all we know, it's taking more time than anything to just figure out if Taika has any time in the next two years to devote to this (have you seen the sheer number and scale of his upcoming films?). They're not going to greenlight a third season if Taika can't commit. And Taika's so busy right now with Next Goal Wins that maybe they haven't even been able to sit down with him to have a lengthy contract discussion.

I'd like to think that Taika and David have discussed the three-act story premise for OFMD thoroughly, since it's something David's been saying since season 1 and if Taika didn't think he could do three seasons then I'd think the show would have been a nonstarter unless it was a 'cross that bridge when we come to it' situation, so the potential difference in opinion here is interesting. But it leads to some possibilities such as a season 3 where Ed and Stede aren't main characters - the focus turns more to the crew, with only half or even a third of the episodes featuring the main duo. Or an even shorter season 3 such as a 3 or 5 episode miniseries to reduce the time commitment for Taika. If the timeline for the show's production has to get pushed out an extra year to fit with his schedule, HBO Max might just decide it's not worthwhile to pursue. So there's a lot of things that can happen, and as much as we want an expanded season 3 with more episodes and a bigger budget, that may very well not be compatible with the reality of Taika's long-term availability.

We have to consider these possibilities. As I've said before, season 3 is in no way guaranteed, even from streaming analytics and critical success - but this is another dimension to this conversation that I haven't heard anyone talking about, and quite possibly the most important one because it's very concrete. No Taika, no OFMD. The fact that he said the show could perhaps go on without him and Rhys shows me this is where his thoughts are as well.

I don't want to make anyone despair here - I want season 3 more than anything. I do believe the show, and the story, deserves the full arc and natural conclusion that David has planned. We absolutely need to keep campaigning for renewal, harder than ever as we move into the one-month-post-finale window. But we should also realize that a big part of the renewal decision is out of our hands, and comes down to the ability of the show's star to actually stay involved. I think Taika will try his best to shuffle things around, but as I said David needs to be able to pitch him a season 3 that convinces him Ed and Stede's story isn't finished yet.

So fingers crossed. We may not hear anything for a while, as negotiations have to involve Taika and he's a busy busy man right now. I am optimistic, but I just wanted to remind folks of this aspect of the process.

[nereidprinc3ss]

i have such a very unpopular opinion. but have you seen pretty little liars? if not, the show is about four girls who try to figure out the source of anonymous threats messages that attempts against their lives. it even has a criminal storyline going one. one of them, spencer hastings, SHE EVEN SHARES HIS NAME is the smartest one and has a similar storyline to reid. i even believe that her character was inspired by reid.

she dresses like this preppy academy girl, has high iq and she even struggles with her own addiction (sleeping pills) that leads her to having anxiety and other psychological things. she makes more sense than maeve trying to be spencer. if a crossover ever happened to exist in some random universe, i’m constantly asking myself how would spencer deal with someone like hastings, or even fall in love with them because it’s so easy and relatable.

reid was the first male character i could relate to because you know, male gaze. and men in comparison to women don’t face the same amount of pressure when it comes about intelligence quotient which is why i’m always seeking comfort in female characters. specially, smart ones because i feel the same. personally speaking, in dating, i also rely on smart men rather than ‘average’ men which is also what i seek when it comes about intimacy/sexual intimacy. for me it’s not about the looks anymore.

i first learned about hastings before reid and fell in love with her because i relate to her so much, for me it’s about our psychological struggles and our tendency to use our iq to hide our vulnerability which makes it so real because we are so fucked up that we will always choose to hide that side of us to normal people. sorry for my rambling, but i needed to get that out.

# i’m claiming this emoji. ❤️

i love rambling!!! thank you for sharing i have not seen pll but i will go on a related rant about iq and self worth and stuff

first of all this is exactly what my and my friend were talking about the other day but with the show suits!! the character mike ross also is a genius w and eidetic memory and a drug problem who goes to jail!! spencer reid truly is the blueprint i think but you can NEVER outdo the doer!!

as for the iq stuff you are so so right. for a long time i based my self worth on my iq and being “gifted” until i realized it was actually completely meaningless and other people thinking i was smart would do nothing for me in the end. but it was the only thing i had to feel good about myself bc i was NOT attractive in middle school/early high school and i was pretty socially awkward so i made myself feel better by thinking about how much smarter than everyone else i was all the time but as you can probably imagine that actually did NOTHING for me except make me feel further isolated and also rlly amped up my narcissistic defensive tendencies!! which was not good!!! (to clarify i am not a narcissist😭 but in my early teenage years i was definitely developing narcissistic QUALITIES)

and then i realized i was failing all my classes anyway and i couldn’t retain any information and i was a fast reader but had absolutely NO reading comprehension. like couldn’t remember the sentence i had LITERALLY just read. and then i got evaluated and diagnosed w adhd which like thank god for medication because im FINALLY capable of learning again but my point is that intelligence is sooo complex and abstract and essentially a empty signifier that means different things to different people. it’s a terrible thing to base your self worth on because it can fluctuate too, and also speaking directly about iq—there is a threshold with iq where if you get above a certain number of standard deviations of average you are actually predicted to be less successful than people with lower iq’s. iq is much less important than we think it is. it’s about what you DO with your potential, not the amount of sheer potential you have

i was actually thinking about that recently cause like?? spencer reid is obviously a rare case and exceptional in every measure BUT a big part of his genius is just his personality. like there are people with eidetic memories and staggeringly high iq’s who do absolutely nothing with their lives and work in offices or construction or something. and obviously he’s fictional but i think that aspect of his character is so interesting because it speaks so much to who he is a person like he never was inherently going to be so intelligent, he had a lot of potential, but it was more due to his desire to learn and his childhood and probably approval seeking but i digress

and also yeah me too babe i am ridiculously sapiosexual but i also have never been attracted to a man who isn’t pretty objectively physically attractive so i need a male model bf who is ALSO a genius and ALSO hilarious and not vain about his looks. like do you hear how ridiculous that is??? im a 7 on my most attractive day and i can’t do mental math like at all…….. so ig this man also must have low standards LOL

so there was my ramble😁 if you read the whole thing im so sorry

[legitimatesatanspawn]

So I remember enjoying dot hack IMOQ and to a lesser degree dot hack GU back on the PS2. The difference had less to do with the gameplay and GU being darker but more to do with loving R1 and the dot hack SIGN anime. I remember being utterly furious that dot hack GU got the PS4 remaster job when dot hack IMOQ needed it more due to being released near the start of the PS2's lifespan.

But I got curious about the sheer number of area locations.

(I also am aware I rarely talk about the series in spite of my Balmung of the Azure Sky avatar/pfp but it's mostly because I'd be talking way more about the Phases and Cubia than anything released from GU anime onward.)

Now for those unaware of the series: with the dot hack franchise the games are designed like a fake MMO because the setting itself is an early example of a VRMMO series. It was out long before Sword Art Online, although Log Horizon has dot hack beat in turn (while still being its own unique thing with Log Horizon more of an en-masse Isekai than the objective secret-known-to-few nightmare that The World is). Each area in-setting of dot hack is supposedly designed by the devs or maybe is just generated out of the box by the blackbox code "Morganna" with humans taking credit.

But because this is a real video game too, instead the area codes are used to help generate which specific style, size, element, level, and sort of drops you'll expect to find in a map. There are some areas that you access only for quest/storyline stuff. There are also some that you are blocked from reaching until you get a specific keyword through the fake forums, emails, or in-game interactions with other characters.

The key code system goes Server then a word from each three distinct codeword banks. So like the most famous example in the series is Delta Hidden Forbidden Holy Ground, but accessing it in Theta, Lambda, or Sigma for example would result in a very different map. Holy Ground is one word as some keywords are like "Sea Sand's", "No Face", or "Royal Edict".

dot hack IMOQ are spread across four games. There's a total of 5 listed servers (I forget if Omega is accessible before/after the finale), 101 word A, 103 word B, and 102 word C.

dot hack GU, which is now 3.5 games, has as far as I know 3 servers with a viable Chaos Gate (the teleportation system to reach the dungeon maps) and 150 word A, 91 word B, and 131 word C.

Even just by the basic number of words I already know this is going to be insane. I never even did more than 200 maps in one set of games, goodness... Admittedly I don't remember if any game locked some key codes off for plot reasons but this is insane.

Basic probability used: A times B times and so on, this results in the potential combinations.

IMOQ: 5 times 101 times 103 times 102 = 5305530, or 1061106 per server. That's 1.06 million combinations. Per server.

GU: 3 times 150 times 91 times 131 = 5364450, or 1788150 per server. 1.79 million combinations.

Thankfully you don't need to visit every area to complete or get everything possible but I think I now know why the characters willingly shell out for The World even setting aside it being native to their computers' OS. It's bigger than anyone could feasibly ever beat!

[yuexuan]

[Review]人间试炼游戏

Title: 人间试炼游戏 The Trial Game of Life

Author: 弄清风

Length: 303 chapters + 4 extras

Tag: Unlimited flow, supernatural, fantasy

Summary [taken from novel updates]:

“Player K27216, Tang Cuo, at 23:05 on April 1, 2019 of the Solar Calendar, confirmed dead.”

“Failed to clear the Trial Game of Life.”

“Survival duration: 24 years, 4 hours, 8 minutes and 6 seconds, Rating: A, Initial character score: -5.”

If death is just the beginning…

If survival is a game…

Are you ready for it?

Novel | Novel[translated]

Comments **Contains spoilers**:

Hoo boy, this is one long novel - not just by the sheer number of chapters, but how long each chapter is. The basic premise is that life is a game and once someone dies, they will enter into the Yong Ye (tln: Forever Night) City. In order to enter into the reincarnation cycle, they would need to survive different quests. Tang Cuo happened to be a private detective who died and entered Yong Ye City. There, he met his previous military instructor Jin Cheng. 

This is one of those novels where I liked the first part more than the second part. So let’s focus on what I like about the initial half of the story first:

The main characters have more personality: Jin Cheng (yes, I admit I read his name wrong for a long time, thinking it was Zhan Cheng 斩丞 instead of Jin Cheng 靳承...) has a lot of side quirks. For example: wearing a clown make-up and applying cosmetic masks at night to ensure that his face looked good. Despite this goofiness, he is one of the top-tier players residing in the A Zone. The other main character, Tang Cuo, is the opposite: he is very cool and collected, and even dares to threaten Jin Cheng, in spite of his low stat. He is also resourceful, going so far as to use his life report book as a weapon. 

As such, there are a lot of comedic factors and room for silliness by the two main characters. At one point Jin Cheng even lured out the murderer Meng Yufei by provoking the latter and reciting his embarrassing life stories from his report book.

There is also a lot more at stake initially. Tang Cuo starts out with very low stats and every action could easily threaten his life. This poses interesting challenges where he has to fight carefully while keeping tabs of his life points.  

A sense of mystery pervades the first half of the book regarding what caused Tang Cuo's death and the relationship between the two characters back when they were alive. Clues are given throughout the start of the novel (e.g. the mysterious person who sends simple gifts to Tang Cuo) and keeps me engaged and constantly guessing.

A lot of the side characters are also pretty fun, such as the lucky Ouhuang Yu Yiyi and Chi Yan, Leng Mou - the magician who keeps on getting the short end of the stick when it came to the roles he played in various quests - and a good number of other side characters.  

Also kudos to the author for being able to work with so many characters and parallel storylines, while still keeping the plot pretty coherent!

Now, to the latter half of the book…It is never a good thing when I start asking myself when the story will end because I struggled to plough through the story:

For one, the world mechanics are...so-so. Don't get me wrong, there are some novelties: I do like the idea that players have to go through multiple scenarios which share an overarching storyline. I also like the idea of having rare musical sheets items that enable the owner to make rules within the City. However, the way that the worldbuilding is presented or paced are not very intriguing. For example, Tang Cuo and Jin Cheng have to complete this fantasy storyline with 12 sub-quests. The first few sub-quests drag on for quite awhile without substantial addition to the main storyline, whereas a few of the later sub-quests are glossed over (which begs the question of why write these sub-quests if they are unimportant). Likewise, the mechanics regarding the restrictions and extent of power that musical sheet owners are granted remain pretty vague - e.g. we don’t know how many rules the owner can make.

Also, despite there being a larger goal of reincarnating, there seems to be a lack of mention regarding what happens after the players reincarnated. Seemingly halfway through, players simply forgot about reincarnation in lieu of focusing on survival.

For all the mysteries and build-up regarding the main characters’ and side characters’ histories, a lot of the reveals are anti-climatic. Tang Cuo’s death was ruled off as him trying to complete the mission that Jin Cheng failed at, but no details regarding the mission were given. Likewise, teasers were given about how one of the minor antagonists (Black Hat) was setting up a grand scheme, when in fact, he only wanted to avenge his family. Basically, the payoff isn't satisfactory relative to the build-up. 

On the note of having so many side characters, the result is that many of the characters (even the main ones!) lacked strong personalities. There are even several characters with repeated personalities or character traits. 

Overall I’ll say this is a mediocre unlimited flow story and would suggest reading only if you really lack other unlimited flow novels to read.

[confusedlamp]

The thing is, conservatives aren't technically incorrect when they claim that politicians and corporate media pander to minorities or put in buzz words to try and appeal to the socially progressive. You can definitely see that in, for example, a politician making a statement for Martin Luther King Day, but not doing anything to enact policies to further racial justice. Or, every time Disney hypes up its "first gay character" just to have it be a throwaway line from an unnamed man or a background kiss that's on the screen for under 2 seconds. Or during Pride month when big businesses change their social media logos to rainbow, but don't even have LGBTQ anti-discrimination policies on the book. Corporations and some politicians definitely see minorities and progressives as a population to be marketed towards and not as people to who deserve to have meaningful stories told about them or have rights that need to be protected.

But what conservatives don't seem to get is 1) that not every attempt at diversity and inclusion is superficial, 2) Plenty of leftists/liberals/ progressives will criticize corporations and politicians when their words are empty, and 3) conservatives are absolutely susceptible to the same pandering.

1) I feel like this point is obvious, but satisfying the "woke mob" isn't the only reason to write diverse characters. It's been said before, but sometimes people just exist! Sometimes those people are in the writer's room or director's chair! If the story being told reflects the real world, shouldn't the characters be like some of the people who exist in the real world? Why would all Starfleet captains be white? Why would there only be male jedi? You're telling me that none of the knights of Camelot, a fictional land, could be into eachother romantically?* Come on. Not everyone is a white, cishet male. Sorry to break it to you.

Also, stories can be made more rich and interesting when you have diverse characters and creators! Not that I really love Marvel, but a major reason why the costuming and set design of Black Panther was beautiful was because they drew on different cultures in Africa, as opposed to only the European styles in a lot of movies. We got to see styles and buildings in whole new ways, and it was gorgeous. Another Marvel example, but in Agents of Shield, they wrote a really twisty and interesting storyline that directly drew on an actor's mixed ethnic background (the actor has said in interviews how she used to be told she was 'too Asian' or 'too white' for parts and she finally didn't have to pretend to be one way or the other). Having different kinds of people creating art allows there to be more cultures to draw stories from, more experiences that can be authentically shown, and often just better art.

*From my knowledge, Camelot is based on Wales and gay Welsh people aren't a new phenomenon

2) Go look up critiques of "Rainbow Capitalism." You certainly can find them all over tumblr during June. Go look at people making fun of the FBI for tweeting out stuff in support of MLK Jr. given their outright hate of him during his lifetime. We know it's bull shit.

3) Conservatives get pandered to. Every time a politician invokes "family values", but doesn't support policies to actually better support families. Every time a politician claims to love the military and respect veterans, but supports making cuts to the VA. Look at the sheer number politicians who pose in their ads with hunting rifles! They don't really all hunt regularly. How many times have politicians misquoted the bible? Attempted to appear more religious than they really are to appease a Christian base? Hell, go look at the whole Starbucks coffee cup "controversy" from a few years ago. Did the politicians really think Starbuck's having a plain red cup during December was somehow newsworthy? It wasn't an attempt to drum up anger in a conservative base? If a big store tells everyone "Merry Christmas" but they don't allow all their Christian employees to take off the 24th and 25th, how is that not pandering?

I know I am writing this on Tumblr and so I'm preaching to the choir. The vast majority of people here aren't conservative and I'm pretty sure no conservatives follow me. It just frustrates me like hell when I see conservatives online or in person talking about "pandering to appease the woke mob" and they aren't technically incorrect, but they are so very wrong. I just needed to yell into the void. Because, come on!

[pandalandalopalis]

rewatching band of brothers when your favourite character is doc roe is like playing where's waldo with every episode except bastogne

[sundayswiththeilluminati]

The unplanned fourth part to my apparently-a-series on Essek Thelyss in the context of real-world espionage (parts 1, 2, and 3), today we look at an aspect of his story that doesn’t always apply in a D&D world: how do you prosecute espionage? 

Psych! That’s not the real question. The real question is: do you prosecute espionage? The answer is a) not as obvious as it might seem; and b) going to differ between D&D and the real world, because D&D governments are storytelling tools and IRL governments are...not.

The benefits of prosecuting espionage are obvious: the interests of justice are served, the person responsible can be punished appropriately and in accordance with the law, the full extent of their crimes are revealed (including potentially exonerating other suspects), counterintelligence gets to chalk up a win, and other people thinking about committing espionage themselves are hopefully discouraged. But there are a surprising number of arguments in the “against” column.

Some agencies that identify enemy assets want to leave them in place for their own purposes. For about 20 years during the Cold War CIA reserved the right to just plain not tell the Department of Justice if they had proof someone was engaged in espionage because they wanted the opportunity to turn them as double agents, feed them misinformation, etc. rather than outing and punishing them (President Gerald Ford ended this arrangement by executive order in 1976). This isn’t necessarily a good idea IRL, but it forms the bread and butter of RPG espionage storylines and is definitely something to think about in a D&D context.

In the real world, ideally someone can only be found guilty of a crime and punished accordingly after a trial, and an agency often finds itself with sufficient evidence to doubt a person’s trustworthiness but not enough hard proof to take to court. In those cases agencies may decide to leave that person in place but cut off their access to classified info. Ironically, sometimes this means promoting them - moving the person into a higher-ranking job in a different area that just so happens not to deal in secrets. Sometimes the asset realizes they’re close to being rumbled and goes along with the effort, maybe taking retirement early or changing jobs before they can be pushed, and the whole matter will quietly lapse without anything so formal as a trial. Sometimes someone makes a mistake and sidelines a loyal, competent employee. That’s a judgement call.

In the real world, ideally someone can only be found guilty of a crime and punished accordingly after an open trial. Given how severe the punishments are for espionage, civilized countries do try to stick to that even though holding such a trial carries risks. Providing proof that someone stole secrets generally requires talking about said secrets, which means revealing classified info in court, which may negate trying to keep the information secret in the first place. They may also not want to reveal in court how they figured out that person was a spy, especially if it was a double agent or cryptographic source that fingered them. In D&D-land where monarchs are common and still wield judicial power, fantasy rulers may hand down whatever punishment they please based on whatever evidence they (or the DM) will accept, so this isn’t as much of a concern.

Even a D&D monarchy that doesn’t have to worry about revealing secrets in court might think twice before publicly punishing a high-ranking spy, though, because the only thing more embarrassing than failing to convict a major spy is succeeding. A government having to admit that its people were compromised, especially high-ranking people, is a body-blow to its standing both at home and abroad. It damages trust in the government, makes the public feel unsafe, and makes allies hesitant to share information lest their secrets be leaked as well. Lower-ranking government employees may think, “My boss is selling secrets, why not me too?” or “Why bother to follow security protocol when some mole will give it all away?” Every decision and contribution made by the asset becomes retroactively suspect, even those that had nothing to do with whatever secrets they leaked. The foreign nation to whom they passed information inevitably gets drawn in as well, negatively affecting those relations. And of course everyone involved looks very, very bad.

All of which leads me to say I think there’s a chance - maybe not a good chance, but a chance - that Essek could privately confess the affair to the Bright Queen without major public repercussions. Leylas Kryn could simply declare him a traitor and order his public execution without justifying herself, but it would raise a lot of questions and none of the answers would help her or the ruling dens; Den Thelyss allowing Den Kryn to unilaterally execute a high-profile member - a child of the umavi - without explanation would stoke ferocious rumors about what Essek might have done and cast a major shadow over the entire den. But publicly declaring what Essek had done also doesn’t do the Dynasty any favors. It makes everyone involved look very bad - how could they miss a spy at the highest level? so close to the Bright Queen herself?? who can be trusted??? - especially Den Thelyss, which might lose its place among the ruling three as a result. Publicly outing such a high-ranking Kryn official as compromised might set off the Dynasty equivalent of a Red Scare, too, since the Explorer’s Guide to Wildemount mentions the constant and well-justified Dynasty fear of agents sent by Lolth to destabilize the Kryn out of sheer spite that they got away from her.

By the time Campaign 2 ended the latest clash between Empire and Dynasty had been settled and neither side seemed to want to stir it up again right away. The fact that both stolen beacons have been returned also bolsters the case for letting the matter lie. A confession from Essek clears up remaining doubt on the Bright Queen’s end - while he doesn’t know every Empire agent in the Dynasty, he can tell her exactly how the beacons were stolen and who else was involved, probably clearing the names of many currently under suspicion. Essek would have to resign as Shadowhand, of course, and leave the Dynasty (at least for a couple centuries), but he never seemed interested in being Shadowhand and he wants to go exploring anyway. Den Thelyss definitely wants the whole affair swept under the rug and would go along with whatever story made that happen. Other than Verin I don’t get the impression many people would miss Essek except as a lost opportunity. I hope they’d give him long enough before leaving Rosohna to pack up his cool leyline-weathervane though. He could totally mount that on Yussa’s tower. Or Allura’s!

And that concludes this particular train of thought re: Essek Thelyss in the context of IRL spies and espionage. Again, all of this is only as relevant to the campaign as the players decide it is, so don’t go giving people crap for being “unrealistic” about their versions of how the beacon trade went down. Frankly the last thing you should want here is realism, because “realistic” espionage is a callous world of deception, manipulation, and general human pettiness with no sense of narrative flow.

None of what I’ve talked about is an excuse for Essek’s actions. But it is a reason. It’s why and how a person entrusted with precious national assets could get into a headspace where it seems reasonable, even necessary, to trade them away to foreign enemies. It’s how a person of otherwise decent character & beliefs can end up committing terrible crimes. It’s why that person might sincerely regret what they’ve done, and not just because they fear punishment. The Warmind Rasputin paraphrases Octavia E. Butler saying, “Misdirected by accident or intent, intelligence can foster its own ecstasies of growth and decay.” In other words: sometimes you get too far into your own head. Without an anchor to reality, without perspective, your own mind gets twisted up. Sometimes you just need a friend (or seven) to grab your arm and say, “Breathe.”

(This accidentally turned into a series on Essek & IRL espionage: Parts 1, 2, 3, 4)

[akirameta84]

Saiki K. - A list of Never-Adapted Chapters

As stated, a list and brief kinda long summery of the chapters never adapted into the anime. Only a few have good reasons aside from time though. (Also a list of reasons for anime only viewers to give the manga a read *cough*)

Warning: I spoil every single one of these chapters. So if you’re lazy and only want to read the non adapted chapters, go ahead and just read the chapter number/name, and avoid the summery. You will be missing a HUGE amount of unadapted scenes if you don’t read the whole manga though, which are present in nearly every chapter, adapted or not. They were likely cut for time like a lot of the chapters, but many add depth and important character development, and actually explain certain dynamics between characters present that were glossed over in the anime.

Reblogs appreciated...this took me so long qwq

Under the cut for sheer length

Chapter 0.1 “Telepathy”: A chapter mainly detailing info about Saiki’s telepathic abilities, and the plot revolves around him stopping his class from believing Nendo stole everybody's wallets.

Chapter 0.2 “Telekinesis”:  A chapter mainly detailing info about Saiki’s telekinetic abilities, and the plot revolves around Nendo “saving” him from being bullied, and him realizing that Nendo actually isn’t a delinquent, and is a good friend. Interestingly, Saiki is able to hear Nendo’s thoughts during this chapter, in which he is internally telling Saiki to run away while he takes the attack from the bullies.

Chapter 0.4 “Precognition”:  A chapter mainly detailing info about Saiki’s precognitive abilities (are you noticing a theme among the volume zero chapters?), and the plot revolves around him receiving a precognition about Nendo’s supposed funeral. Saiki follows Nendo around all day as they hang out in preparation of his date, and it’s (obviously) revealed the girl did it as a dare. Saiki uses his teleportation to apport a bowling ball Nendo had bought with the girl’s phone, and sends a message telling Nendo that she was simply busy and had to miss the date. The two go to Nendo’s house and it’s revealed the memorial was for Nendo’s already deceased dad, not him.

Chapter 0.5 “Teleportation”: A chapter mainly detailing info about Saiki’s ability to teleport/apport, and the plot revolves around Chouno attempting a magic show with a new assistant, after firing Ike-san (still homeless at the time) for making mistakes. His assistant, however, is purposely sabotaging him. Part way through, Ike-san shows up and thinks about how he should’ve been a better assistant, and his makeover is revealed. Near the end of the show a trick is attempted to where Chouno’s assistant is meant to teleport out of a box, but of course she does nothing. It is noticed that her and Ike-san have swapped places, due to Saiki apporting the two of them, and Chouno and Ike-san reunite.

Chapter 0.6 “Clairvoyance”:  A chapter mainly detailing info about Saiki’s clairvoyant abilities, and the plot revolves around Kaido accidently spotting Saiki teleporting from a distance, and trying to find out who it was. Unfortunately, the drawing he is using to ask around for the “Trickster” looks nothing like Saiki. At the end of the chapter, Saiki appears before Kaido with the face of his crude drawing, and teleports out, to appease him. (Interesting tidbit about this chapter is that the mysterious stranger from the birthday arc appears in the class while Saiki uses his clairvoyance to watch Kaido. He also appears in the background of chapter 41 (the telepathy silencer movie chapter), but not in the anime equivalent.) 

Chapter 0.7 “Astral Projection”:  A chapter mainly detailing info about Saiki’s ability to astral project, and the plot revolves around Saiki using telekinesis to deflect a stray baseball from hitting him, but it instead hits Nendo, subsequently knocking him out right before he was due to play in a baseball game. Thus, Saiki uses astral projection to take over Nendo’s body and play in the baseball game for him.

Chapter 8 “ Fighting for a RePSIval!”: Saiki and Nendo end up stopping a failing musician from jumping off a roof due to his enormous debt. Nendo gets the idea to help the man gain money by selling the CDS of his music he had ordered in bulk, which were the result of the debt, due to them not selling. He performs live in the park, and Saiki accidently uses his telepathy to project the song to everyone in the are, causing them to believe it became stuck in their heads due to how good it was. 

Chapter 00 “Special One-Shot: The DiPSIster of Psychic Saiki Kusuo”: This chapter falls in-between 8 and 9. It is a collection of oneshots set in a slightly different universe (likely a pilot or a very early storyline) in which it details information over several of Saiki’s powers, much like Volume 0.

Chapter 32 “ExPSIbition! Jump Festa”: Saiki goes out to Jump Festa to purchase merchandise due to an errand from his mom. There he meets Kaido, and the whole chapter’s gag is subtle advertisement for Jump Festa. The pair run into a crying child, who had lost his mom. He smartly refuses to go with Kaido to a help desk due to stranger danger, but Kaido comes back in his cosplay and since the kid vaguely recognizes him after he “proves” he really is that character (with Saiki’s help), the kid is returned to his mom.

Chapter 73 “PubliPSIzing the Popularity Contest Results!“: Saiki ends up in an alternate universe to where people’s popularity is shifted. (The chapter is based on the popularity poll that was held, hence that being the joke). Saiki is the most popular in this world, and he is bombarded with people until he hides away in the bathroom and transforms into Kuriko. This allows the original world’s Saiki to return, and he briefly explains why the world is this way, before sending Saiki, as Kuriko, back.

Chapter 88 “Press Play! A "Making Of" PSItory”: Saiki finishes watching a movie, and he remarks about how he loved it due to the quality of the acting and would like to visit the place it was filmed. Shortly after, he teleports to the location while returning the movie. He then decides to use his psychometry to see how the movie was filmed, and slowly it is revealed that the actors themselves were quite bad, especially the child star who Saiki believed to be a very good actor. The reason the movie was so good is revealed to be because the scenes in the movie were filmed as a supposed to be “behind the scenes”, and those were put in place instead of the actual filmed scenes.

Chapter 95 “The PSInnacle of the Golden Age of Heroes! A Fun Party Game”: Kaidou, Nendo, and Kuboyasu visit Saiki’s house the same day the game “J-Stars Victory Vs” was supposed to be arriving for him. A package arrives at the door, but instead of J-Stars, it is “C-Heroes Vale Tudo Battle”, a ripoff game by Saiki’s dad’s manga company. Kaido, Nendo, and Kuboyasu are all enamored by the game and reveal that they love Cognac, the magazine the game is for, and they all play the game. At the end of the chapter, the actual wanted game arrives, and the trio are just as excited and want to play that instead.

Chapter 102 “The Achromatic InviPSIble Boy”: (My personal favorite chapter) Saiki turns himself invisible to avoid running into his friends on the way to school, and winds up inside an empty storage room in order to wait for his invisibility to wear off. Unfortunately, a group of girls decided to use this room to change due to the peeping tom that’s been rumored around the campus. He hides by gripping onto the ceiling and waiting for them to leave, but when his invisibility is about to wear off the girls have still not left. After some time spent dodging and hiding, the door is opened by Saiki, revealing the actual peeping tom. The girls chase after him and Saiki uses the opportunity to escape.

Chapter 118 “The DiPSIster of the Rental Video Store”: Saiki, due to being bored, decides to go to a rental movie store to rent a movie to watch. Unfortunately, the current cashier is one that Saiki doesn’t favor very much, because she is high on his list for potential spoilers, but he remarks that at least the manager, a man who has seen nearly every movie, isn’t there. But (lmao), the manager switches positions with the cashier shortly after. Saiki then runs into Takahashi, who is purchasing pornography. In exchange for not telling the school about this, Saiki asks Takahashi to check out his movies for him. Takahashi gets caught like the dumbass he is and the plan is ruined.

Chapter 133 “An ExPSIlent Wife and Mother!? Mom's Class Reunion”: Saiki starts the chapter off by explaining how his mother is scatterbrained, and showing examples of it. Kurumi than remarks that she is going to her class reunion, which is being held in the city near her this year instead of way out in the country, meaning she can attend. When she arrives she starts getting reintroduced to her classmates who she hasn’t seen in 20 years, and talking about how different they are. Only one of the attendees, however, is actually from her class, and he reveals that the whole event is a plan to get closer to Kurumi, in order to use her for her eldest son’s wealth. Saiki, who had come to watch after having a bad feeling about the event, follows him into the bathroom and threatens him to stay away from his mom. Before he can finish, Kurumi accidently stumbles into the men’s bathroom, and her former classmate claims that her youngest son had attacked him unprovoked. Kurumi attacks the man, claiming her son would never do such a thing.

Chapter 134 “Kaidou and Kuboyasu's PSIpicions”: (The BEST Chapter) Kaidou and Kuboyasu are talking near their lockers about how neither of them got any chocolate for valentines day, and the conversation strays off to talking about Hairo. The two remark that they never see him talking to or dating girls, despite his popularity, and joke that he must be gay. The two are later found following Hairo, and bring up incidents that add to their growing suspicion. They soon find Hairo talking to Nendo, and begging the latter to join his club, stating that it has to be him. The conversation is normal, but Kaidou and Kuboyasu keep mistaking parts of it as being dirty. They watch Nendo and Hairo have a sumo match, and confront him after it, stating that it’s fine if he his gay, they were just curious. Hairo laughs it off and says he isn’t, but after another risque seeming scene (including an omake where Hairo and Nendo remark about keeping their relationship secret and how Hairo is willing to come out for him 🤔 ) the duo agree to stop thinking about it.

Chapter 165 “Train DiPSIster”: Saiki decides to take the train to a coffee shop 30 minutes away from his house instead of teleporting, claiming coffee jelly tastes much more satisfying if there is effort put into travelling there...though he does plan to teleport home. He explains how annoying train rides are for him, due to his telepathy, and how if someone playing music loudly is annoying for you, how much worse it is to listen everyone complain about said music. Over the course of the trip, Saiki begins to get anxious due to the crowds and his telepathy, and is relieved when several people get off. Unfortunately, he receives a precognition about the train stopping, and ends up saving a man from jumping in front of the train. Saiki winds up teleporting to the coffee shop. 

Chapters 176 & 177 “PSIolving the Biggest Riddle!”: Saiki shrinks himself to retrieve his mother’s wedding band that had fallen down a drain, and when he jumps down, he remarks that the sink had become essentially 80 meters tall due to his height. He lays down in his bed afterwards, deciding to take a nap while he returns to normal size. When he wakes up however, he is much taller than normal. Due to the fact his body keeps growing, to avoid destroying the house anymore, Saiki teleports away to an island to hide, but he realizes that he teleported to an island closer to land due to his height throwing off his teleport. He hides under the water to avoid being caught, but ends up having to teleport away to avoid being seen. He accidently ends up on land, and nearby is a tribe of people, who are speaking a strange language. Before they approach him, Saiki ducks into his shirt, remarking that he feels embarrassed and is at a loss. He ends up floating and crashes to the ground once he reaches a certain height. It eventually clicks and he returns home, normal size. He had realized that his growing and shrinking powers were the same, but growing happened slowly, and shrinking happened quickly, hence why he would return to normal size slowly. The cause of this issue? The off comment he made about the sink “Becoming 80 meters tall.”

Chapter 201 “A Miraculous InvenPSIon”: Saiki notices his dad using a tablet and asks him what it his, to which Kunihara explains. Once he remembers he has work, Kunihara runs off, but not before offering his old tablet to Saiki, saying he can use it to read books and buy things. A little while later, Saiki is amazed by the tablet. He remarks about the shopping sites he an use to buy not only physical copies of books on, but digital ones as well. He keeps thinking about how amazing the online shopping sites and recommendations are, meanwhile he performs basically the same exact thing to his mom, when she requests he go out and buy groceries, as he instantly apports them for her, and also added foil because he had a precognition about her running out. While searching for appliances, he stumbles on the coffee jelly maker he owns, and finds out it has shitty reviews, but everyone recommends a newer model. He looks for the cheapest price of it, and finds an ad claiming to sell it for 100 yen. However, he falls for the trick of a ridiculous shipping fee, and his father laughs and remarks how just like his mother, he got scammed. Angry, Saiki teleports to the factory and threatens them into giving him the model for 100 yen, claiming that he doesn’t have to pay the shipping fee if he picks it up himself.

Chapter 229 “No Need for Bath Salts! Taking a Dip in the PSIcret Hot Spring”: Saiki decides to take a visit to a secluded hot springs in the mountains to relax himself, but unfortunately two strangers decided to hike there at the very same time. He cannot just teleport or walk away, since he didn’t bring his clothes with him, having teleported there to begin with. To make them leave, he decides to heat the hot spring up, so that the two men get overheated and decic to leave. One of the men, however, decides to try and stay in the water that is slowly gaining heat, in order to outlast Saiki. The man eventually gets out and faints, and to avoid having to help them, Saiki feigns having fainted from the heat as well, causing the two men to leave on their own.

Chapter 243 ″Welcome to PSIberspace”: Saiki’s dad has a new VR headset, and while he has to leave for work he offers it to Saiki to play with. Saiki is enamored by the horror game his dad was playing, being that it’s able to surprise him. The jump scares, however, cause him to accidently use his telekinesis, which is actually blowing stuff up at his dad’s workplace, instead of his house. 

Chapter 245 “Trending on a Streaming PSIte”: Kaidou, Nendo, Kuboyasu, and Saiki are all hanging out, and Kaidou mentions he has a camera and wants to become a youtuber (Yotubo-er is what it’s called). At a café, the group suggests video ideas, such as Teruhashi. In order to prevent this plan, however, Saiki uses telekinesis to stab french fries into their eyes when Teruhashi ends up walking by the café. On the walk home, however, Saiki receives a premonition  about all the video ideas they suggested becoming popular, including one of him using his abilities on the french fries. He obtains the camera from Kaidou and deletes the footage, which had been recording due to the camera being on the entire time.

Chapter 255 “APSIsting In Mediating A Long-Term Marriage!”: Saiki and his parents go to visit his grandparent’s, only to learn the pair is fighting, and his grandmother would like a divorce. The start of the entire fight is revealed to be because Kumagoro left the toilet seat up, and Kumi explains how she’s had to put the seat down for 40 years. The reason she was so adamant to divorce as well was because Kuusuke had pushed her to it. Kumi gets ready to leave the house, especially after Kumagoro purposely leaves the lid up one last time. Saiki stops her and tells her to put down the lid one more time, only for the words ‘I’m Sorry’ to be written on it. The fight is resolved.

Chapter 264 “Please Go Watch the Live ActPSIon Movie!”: A manga Saiki reads is getting a live action movie, and he is particularly upset about it. His dad happens to be the editor for the manga, and takes him to the filming set to change his mind. (By the way, this is the best chapter for showcasing Kunihara’s shittiness as a father. He physically attacks his son several times. Missing, of course, but he still actively attacks him. Kunihara is a horrible person, let alone father.) Saiki views the set and is perturbed by the actor choices, specifically Makoto as the lead character. He is even more upset to learn that the movie features an original character (like a badly written wattpad fanfiction), and that the end of the movie even features the death of the main character, and Kunihara explains that it differs from the manga greatly. He explains to his son that the changes make the movie better, and Saiki ends up agreeing after he winds up viewing the actual live-action movie.

[lesserfandomappreciation]

Is that Supa Strikers show really that great? Would I like it even if I don’t like soccer/football? (I’m asking because I’ve never seen it. In fact, your posts are the only reason I know it exists at all.)

Okay. Okay, okay I was going to work on requests during this meeting but then I saw this and I have many feelings on this show so you're getting an essay. Buckle up son. Brief History

For those not in the know, Supa Strikas is a series from South Africa that started as a futbol-themed comic in I want to say the early 2000s. It quickly gained popularity throughout most of Africa and today is published in Latin-America, South America, Africa, some parts of Europe and Asia.

Almost every continent has this comic. You cannot tell me that isn't cool and also very telling of how many people like this series.

Seeing the comic get so popular so fast, a TV show followed up in 2009 by the same name and is still going to this day. This series has been along longer than most presidential terms.

The show had a similar story with only slight character changes, and while the entirety of the 2021 season is already out, there are signs that they may be more coming out in 2022 so. Fingers crossed!

What is it about?

The story centers around Shakes, a young futbol player who has recently joined the Supa Strikas, a team based in an unspecified African country. The comic follows the team winning the Super League during different seasons, going around the world to find out new techniques, deal with teams that cheat and overcome their own inner problems as well.

The series differs from the comics in that we don't see Shakes' journey to becoming a Supa Strika and we don't get the official names for the characters either, only their nicknames. Wikipedia has their official names listed I think, but if anyone whose read the comics wishes to tell me, by all means do so.

It's a pretty straight forward storyline, with some good story consistency (characters who appear in one episode do show up again and are given consistent writing). Very episodic.

Why should I watch the series?

The series is fun. Sincerely, un-apologetically fun.

The main characters get good screen time and we get to see some fun, decently written personalities that act off each other well. The Supa Strikas is a team of himbos but different varieties of himbos and I love them for it. You do get the feeling that this is a group of people that cares for each other, not a group of characters just shoved together because the series said so.

The side-characters are also great. Some of them are a little one-note but many of them are just as crazy, if not more fun, than the main characters of the show. There's an American dude named Ninja whose entire gimmick is that he's a reality star fame-seeking dude straight out of Las Vegas and I love him. He's one of the tamer character concepts.

Coach. That is all.

There's a vast array of diverse representation. While the Supa Strikas team is the only team is they only team of mixed nationalities (South African, Jamaican, Brazilian, Spanish, etc) every team is representing a different country. There's a Brazilian Team, a Mexican Team, a Saudi Arabian Team and many others.

In connection - the Supa Strikas have players from around the world. Dancing Rasta is Jamaican, the captain of the team, an incredibly competent leader and very down-to-earth. You do have players that are a little stereotypical (North Shaw is an Australian who loves extreme sports, shocker) but are written in ways that you find yourself not minding.

It's funny. There's a lot of good moments both in writing and in the animation. As someone who got to study animation, I can say without a shadow of doubt that the team behind the character animations had no fear in pushing what they can do and making the characters feel fun.

Some of the stereotypes used in the show are used well and are written in a fairly respectful way. El Matador, a Spanish player, fills the stereotype of being a self-absorbed Spaniard. but he's also written to care for friends and to be very competent in other areas. Plus, there are other Spanish characters like Riano that are nothing like that and have distinctly different personalities. As a Spaniard, I found this to be a good writing choice. These jokes are seen less as insults and more like friendly barbs between most countries and it doesn't detract from the show.

The technology. It's a running gag that the tech used to train the guys is progressively more outrageous.

No forced romance storylines! There's no character moment where boy meets girl and then we're stuck watching this inevitable couple find reasons to not be a couple. It's nice to not have the forced hetero-normative relationships we see in a lot of other shows.

To that end, fantastic healthy male friendships! There's no "no homo" moment and the characters all have very good chemistry. Again, you feel like they're actually friends. They all have different dynamics too, so the friendships don't feel uniform and stale.

Good emotional moments.

Bromances for the win! Genuinely shocked there's not more fandom for it considering the sheer quantity of POSSIBILITIES of bromances and potential ships to work with.

It's 100% fine if you don't know anything about futbol. The show shows literally what matters, not every single little throw-in, and most times there's some world-breaking nonsense going on that distracts from that. There's literally an episode where the opposing team changes gravity on the the field to try and beat the Supa Strikas, the rules barely matter. I promise you, you don't need to know what "Offsides" means in order to watch.

The commentators. I love them both.

The episodes are varied in stories. There's ones about training, ones about exploring a different country, others where the opponents cheat, etc. There's an episode which is almost a murder mystery and I love it.

All the episodes can be found free online on Youtube on the official channel for the show. I love this creative team so much.

There's a lot of good writing choices!

What might I not like about the show?

Some people like episodic shows, some don't. For those in the latter category this may drive them away from Supa Strikas.

There's like. 4 female characters. I can see why they did that, but I can also see why that is upsetting (speaking as a woman who is very tired of the Smurfette principle). The humor may not be for everyone. That's more based on personality, because I think there's something for everyone, but there are jokes that I recognize fall quite flat.

In connection to that, the stereotypes. Like I mentioned earlier, the show utilizes and breaks some stereotypes very well. There's a character (Spenza) who is written to be the chubby comic relief that is also 9/10 times the guy who saves LITERALLY EVERYONE from trouble and gets recognized for it, for example. However, the entire Japanese team is a karate-based team with a Coach named Ura Giri who wears Chinese clothes despite being Japanese. The German team is just a military branch and, while funny, might be offensive depending on which German you ask. It can be detracting from the show.

There's some bad writing choices that can be rough, but they are episode centric.

What should I do?

Watch the show. Give it 2-3 episodes and if it doesn't grab you, okay! You tried! If it does, welcome! it's literally for free on youtube, Seasons 1 through the last number I can't remember. I watch it when I'm working on something because it's fun and gets me to laugh, you might watch it with a bowl of popcorn. Just do your own thing!

If you do like it though, come back, hit me up with talks and questions about it. Besides multydoodles I haven't found a lot of people who really are into it so come! Join us! One of us!

Hope this mini-essay helped out and that the show works out for you!

[otp-armada]

If Jason wanted to convince me that Lxa was the love of Clarke's life, he wouldn't have killed her off, effectively cutting their love story permanently, with 4.5 seasons left of the show. Their arc, starting with their introduction in 2x07 and concluding with L's death in 3x07, is 17 episodes long, accounting for 17% of the entire narrative. If I generously add 3x16 to the count, an episode in which L is already dead in the corporeal world Clarke is trying to return to, it's a whopping, grand total of 18%. An 18% congruous with Clarke's intense connection to Bellamy and vice versa, which even A.lycia confirmed as romantic. Feelings romantic enough to spur the formation of a love triangle. An 18% ignoring Clarke's ultimate choice to go back to her people when L wanted her to stay.

CL is a chapter in the story begun and wrapped up in the first half of the narrative. And that's omitting further illumination on the finer details making CL so problematic for Clarke. Do you expect me to believe it was coincidental for CL to occur at a time when Clarke was spiraling down a dark path, commencing with Finn's death? Who played a hand in forcing Clarke's own hand, with Finn, and TonDC, and Mount Weather? Whose example inspired her to ensnare herself in armor and warpaint to be strong enough to save her people? Whose behavior did she emulate in the pushing away of support from her people? Who gave her a place to continue hiding from Bellamy, her mom, and her friends? A place to be someone other than Clarke Griffin? In lieu of facing her fears like the heroine she is? The purpose of CL wasn't to provide Clarke with a magnificent, fairy tale romance gone tragically wrong. I believe Jason's intent with the relationship aimed to further damage Clarke's psyche after L's death, to solidify the belief that her love is not only deadly to its recipients but renders her too weak to do what must be done for survival.

After 3x16, CL is an often superfluous namedrop or two per season for Clarke to briefly react to before carrying on with the plot. Season 5 aside, most of these references are needless enough to be able to interpret them as attempts at reparations for the L/CL fandom's benefit -and their views- without altering the course of the story. Crazy me for thinking it's not enough to constitute an ongoing love story. Crazy me for not thinking this was on par with interactions between living characters. Crazy me for thinking it doesn't befit a love story for the protagonist.

This sliver of the story is what Jason and the CLs would have us unquestionably believe is the pervasive love story of The 100's seven seasons?

Despite his lie and the constant gaslighting from the pineapple CLs, some of us know how to decipher what a temporary love interest is. Lxa? I think you know where I'm heading with this.

I'll acknowledge my admittedly negative appraisal of CL as someone who recognizes its value to the LGBT+ community and treats it as valid while not caring for L/CL on a narrative level. I felt, when swayed by L's influence, Clarke became the antithesis of what I found admirable about her. I resented Clarke's acquiescence of her power to the commander. I wanted nothing more than to remove the wedge L had driven between Clarke and Bellamy.

Let me try to give L/CL the benefit of the doubt for a minute. I don't hold L as responsible for Clarke's choices, but I recognize the prominent role she played in their upbringing. The push and pull was an intriguing aspect of their dynamic, as was the chance to meet a manifestation of who Clarke might have been if she was all head, no heart. Her fall from grace was arguably necessary for her to be a fully-rounded character, not a Mary Sue. It wouldn't be realistic for the protagonist of a tragic story about a brutal world to be a pure cinnamon roll. When forgiveness is an innate theme with Clarke, it would be my bias at work if I was content with her applying it to everyone but Lxa. Clarke saw enough commonalities between her and L to identify with the latter. When she extended forgiveness to L, I believe it was her way of taking the first step on the path to making peace with herself by proxy. None of this means I wanted them paired up. At best, I made my peace with seeing the relationship through to its eventual end. In time for L's death, ironically. My passivity about them notwithstanding, my conclusions are, however, supported by canon.

If I may submit a Doylist reason for romantic CL? Jason knew he had a massive subfandom itching to see them coupled, thereby boosting ratings and generating media buzz. A Watsonian reason? Without relevance, I think L would have been another Anya to Clarke. Grapple shortly with the unfair taking of a life right as they choose to steer towards unity, melancholy giving way to the inconvenience of the loss of a potential, powerful political ally. Romance ensured her arc with L would have the designated impact on Clarke's character moving forward in the next act.

For a show not about relationships, Jason has routinely used romantic love as a shorthand for character and dynamic development. It's happened with so many hastily strung together pairings. And when it does, everyone and their mother bends over backward to defend the relationship. It's romantic because it just is. Didn't you see the kissing? Romantic.

No, The 100 at its core is not about relationships, romantic and otherwise. But stack the number of fans invested exclusively by the action against those of us appreciating a strong plot but are emotionally attached to the characters and dynamics. Who do we think wins? Jason can cry all he wants over an audience refusing to be dazzled solely by his flashy sci-fi.

Funnily enough, "not about relationships'' is only ever applied to Bellarke. Bellarke, a relationship so consistently significant, it's the central dynamic of the show. The backbone on which the story is predicated. Only with Bellarke does it become super imperative to represent male-female platonic relationships. As if Bellarke is the end all, be all of platonic friendship representation on this show. In every single television show in the history of television shows.

Where was this advocacy when B/echo was foisted upon on us after one scene between them where he didn't outright hate Echo? When one interaction before that, he nearly choked the life out of her. If male-female friendship on TV is so sparse, why didn't B/ravens celebrate the familial relationship between Bellamy and Raven? Isn't the fact that they interpret Clarke as abusive to Bellamy all the more reason to praise his oh-so-healthy friendship with Raven as friendship? They might be the one group of shippers at the least liberty to use this argument against Bellarke, lest they want to hear the cacophony of our fandom's laughter at the sheer hypocrisy of the joke. Instead, they've held on with an iron grip to the one sex scene from practically three lifetimes ago when the characters were distracting themselves from their feelings on OTHER people? They've recalled this as "proof" of romance while silent on (or misconstruing) the 99% of narrative wherein they were platonic and the 100% of the time they were canonically non-romantic.

Bellarke is only non-romantic if you believe love stories are told in the space of time it takes for Characters A & B to make out and screw each other onscreen, a timespan amounting to less than the intermission of a quick bathroom break. If it sounds ridiculous, it's because it is. And yet, some can't wrap their heads around the idea that maybe, just maybe, a well-written love story in its entirety is denoted by more than two insubstantial markers and unreliable qualifiers. B/raven had sex, and the deed didn't fashion them into a romance. Jasper and Maya kissed but didn't have sex. Were they half a romantic relationship? Bellarke is paralleled to romantic couples all the time, but it counts for nothing in the eyes of their rival-ship fandom adversaries. Take ship wars out of it by considering Mackson. Like B/echo, the show informed us that Mackson became a couple post-Praimfaya, offscreen, via a kiss. Does anyone fancy them an epic love story with their whisper of a buildup? Since a kiss is all it takes, as dictated by fandom parameters, we should.

If Characters A & B are ensconced in a romantic storyline, then by definition, their relationship is neither non-romantic nor fanon. "Platonic" rings hollow as a descriptor for feelings canonically not so.

If the rest of the fandom doesn't want to take our word for granted, Bob confirmed Bellarke as romantic. Is he as delusional as we are? Bob is not a shipper, but he knows what he was told to perform and how. Why do the pineapples twist themselves in knots to discredit his word? If they are so assured by Jason's word-of-god affirmation, then what credibility does it bear to have Bellarke validated by someone other than the one in charge? They're so quick to aggressively repudiate any statement less than "CL is everything. Nothing else exists. CL is the only fictional love story in The 100, nay, the WORLD. CL is the single greatest man-made invention since the advent of the wheel."

We've all seen a show with a romantic relationship between the leads at the core of the story. We all know the definition of slowburn. We can pinpoint the tropes used to convey romantic feelings. We know conflict is how stories are told. We know when interferences are meant to separate them. We know when obstacles are overcome, they're stronger for it. We know that's why the hurdles exist. We know those impediments often take the shape of interim, third-party love interests. We know what love triangles are. We know pining and longing.

Jason wasn't revolutionary in his structure of Bellarke. He wasn't sly. Jason modeled them no differently than most other shows do with their main romances. Subtler and slower, sure. Sometimes not subtle at all. There's no subtlety in having Clarke viscerally react to multiple shots of Bellamy with his girlfriend. No subtlety in him prioritizing her life over the others in Sanctum's clutches. In her prioritizing his life above all the other lives she was sure would perish if he opened the bunker door. There is no subtlety in Bellamy poisoning his sister to stave off Clarke's impending execution. In her relinquishing 50 Arkadian lives for him after it killed her to choose only 100 to preserve. In her sending the daughter Clarke was hellbent to protect, into the trenches to save him. In him marching across enemy lines to rescue her. In her surrender to her kidnapper to march to potential death, to prevent Bellamy's immediate one. No subtlety in Josie's callouts. No subtlety in Lxa's successful use of his name to convince Clarke to let a bomb drop on an unsuspecting village. Bet every dollar you have that the list goes on and on.

There are a lot of layers to what this show was. It was a tragedy, with hope for light at the end of the tunnel. It was, first and foremost, a post-apocalyptic sci-fi survival drama. Within this overarch is the story of how the union of Clarke Griffin and Bellamy Blake saves humanity, ushering in an age of peace. In this regard, their relationship transcended romance. But with the two of them growing exponentially more intimate each season, pulled apart by obstacles only to draw closer once again, theirs was a love story. A romantic opus, the crescendo timed in such a way that the resolution of this storyline -the moment they get together- would align with the resolution of the main plot. Tying Bellarke to the completion of this tale made them more meaningful than any other relationship on this show, not less.

Whereas the trend with every other pair was to chronicle whether they survived this hostile world intact or succumbed to it, Bellarke was a slowburn. A unique appellation for the couples on this show, but not disqualifying them from romantic acknowledgment.

Framing Bellarke in this manner was 100% Jason's choice. If he wanted the audience to treat them as platonic, he should have made it clear within the narrative itself, not through vague, word-of-god dispatches. A mishandled 180-degree swerve at the clutch as a consequence of extra-textual factors doesn't negate the 84% of the story prior. It's just bad writing to not follow through. And Jason's poor, nearsighted decisions ruined a hell of a lot more than a Bellarke endgame.

The problem is, when Bellarke is legitimized, the pineapples are yanked out of their fantasies where they get to pretend the quoted exaggerations above are real. Here I'm embellishing, but some of them have deeply ingrained their identities in CL to the degree where hyperbole is rechristened to incontestable facts. An endorsement for Bellarke is an obtrusive reminder of the not all-encompassing reception of their ship. A lack of positive sentiment is an attack on their OTP, elevated to an attack on their identity. Before long, it ascends to an alleged offense to their right to exist. The perpetrators of this evil against humanity are the enemy, and they must attack in kind, in defense of themselves.

Truthfully, I think it's sad, the connotation of human happiness wholly dependent on the outcome of a fictional liaison already terminated years ago. I'm not unaware of the marginalization of minorities, of the LGBT+ community, in media. I haven't buried my head in the sand to pretend there aren't horrible crimes committed against them. I don't pretend prejudice isn't rampant. When defense and education devolve into hatred and libel for asinine reasons, though, the line has been crossed. You don't get a free pass to hurt someone with your words over a damn ship war. No matter how hard you try to dress it up as righteous social justice, I assure you, you're woefully transparent.

[tea-with-veth]

Hello, and welcome back to The Tea Party, where I interview authors from the Minecraft Youtube fandom! Today’s guest is the one and only @aenqa, author of Protected, as well as a number of brilliant Dream SMP fics! 

Tell us about yourself!

Sure! So, I go by Aenqa online, and that's what all my social media is under - AO3 and Tumblr being my main accounts. I use both she/her and they/them pronouns and I'm a writer who's especially into MCYT and Dream SMP fic right now!

How long have you been writing?

I've been writing my whole life, really - I still have my very first "book" which was a few pieces of stapled-together printer paper that I made when I was around five years old. I've been writing fic for probably about a decade, since I was a teenager. For MCYT stuff, I've been writing since about August 2020. :)

Your fics have a lot of traction-- Protected alone has 9.5K kudos on AO3. Was there a moment for you where you went “holy cow this is big” or was it more gradual?

It was definitely gradual at first. When I was publishing Protected, it was getting a decent amount of traction, but it was pretty typical for fics at that time. When I completed it, I think it was around 1K kudos. Then there was a moment after it was completed when the whole "medieval AU" became a HUGE thing in the DNF fandom after the King George storyline happened in the Dream SMP. People were actively seeking out medieval content, and I happened to have a really long, completed story in that vein already written. I started getting a lot of mentions and recommendations on Twitter, and that's the moment when I was like, Woah. There are suddenly a ton of people reading this who want to see more from me. That was a totally unique experience for me, and it was really cool!!

Did that ever feel very intense or stressful, or was it generally smooth sailing?

It was stressful at times. When you have a fic that gets popular, there are some people who feel more free to criticize it or make slightly mean jokes about it online, which was a little strange to get used to. But overall, it was a really great experience. It was so exciting to see people talking about something I had written. And I'm super proud of Protected, so it made me really happy that it was bringing other people joy, too! Plus, it made me feel like I had something of a built-in audience for other fics I wanted to write, which was also really amazing.

What have you been writing recently?

I've been focusing a lot more on Dream SMP fics recently, rather than RPF. Although I dabble in a lot of different areas (like AUs or canon-divergent stuff), I'm really interested in fics that are more-or-less canon-compliant. The characters and character relationships in the Dream SMP are really rich and interesting to me, and I love being able to really dig into them and explore them in a way that can't always happen through the streaming medium. Both my AO3 stuff and the shorter fics I write for Tumblr tend to center around those characters, especially the SBI characters. But really I just love writing anything that revolves around the Dream SMP - it feels like such a fun and expansive playground for making fan content. There's so much potential from almost every angle!

I'm also really glad people seem to be enjoying my Dream SMP stuff, because as happy as I am with how Protected came out, I'm not overly interested in RPF in general, and I don't want to be seen as just a DNF writer. It makes me happy when people who find me through Protected are willing to give my other works a try. (Though there's certainly nothing wrong with being just a DNF writer!)

So, talking about readers, and the MCYT community in general, what are some things you really love about the community? And is there something you'd like to see change?

There are some things I really really love about the MCYT community. There are so many FANTASTICALLY talented fanartists and writers in this community. The sheer amount and overwhelming quality of fanwork for the Dream SMP, for example - and the way it communicates with and even influences canon - is so fascinating. I've met some really amazing people in this space and made some incredible friends, people who are just genuinely kind and immensely talented. I think there's a really cool writing community of people who are genuine to each other and support each other's work. 

I do think the MCYT community in general might be going through some growing pains as it gets bigger and bigger. I generally wish people could stop picking fights with each other over characters - although I understand the impulse to defend your favorite or preferred character at times. From my perspective, it's much more interesting to think about and explore the complicated characters and relationships in the story than to go to war over who's "right" in a complicated moral situation. I don't think that flaw is anything unique to MCYT, though. I think it's something a lot of fanspaces have to deal with.

A lot of young authors are getting started writing with the MCYT fandom-- are there some words of wisdom you have for them?

I would say the best thing you can do for your writing is to find other people who are on the same wavelength as you and want to write with you. Are you writing 100% for fun? That's awesome! And writing is so much more fun when you have friends who hype up your stuff and write along with you, regardless of the reception you get from internet strangers. Are you writing to improve your craft? That's great! And fanfiction can be a great place to get a lot of writing done and practice and hone your skills. You should find people who are willing to really push you, to beta for you, or give you comments and be honest with you and really push you to improve. 

At this point, I feel like I should give a shout-out to my friends who have done that for me. There have been several and I hate to name them specifically for fear of leaving someone out, but I have made several writing friends in this space who have made me a better writer. It's been an incredibly gratifying experience for me and I really hope that every young writer finds a friend or two like that, because it turns writing from what can be a somewhat lonely, intimidating experience into something that can be communal and collaborative, and fun. It also might take a bit of an ego check to accept criticism from other people, but once you can do that without taking it personally, you'll see major improvements - it's worth the wounded pride! 

Before we go, any final thoughts or shoutouts?

Shout out to the Free Real Estate discord (that's our title right now at least, I'm sure it'll have changed by the time the interview gets posted, but they know who they are...) you guys rock and I love you all dearly! and shout out to the lo-fi hip hop beats girl, she always has my back.

Check out Aenqa’s work on Ao3, and go follow her on Tumblr! The next Tea Party will be with HognoseSnake, coming soon! As always, if you have suggestions for who I should interview next, or questions you’d like to see answered, let me know! I’m saving ideas in my inbox, and I really appreciate them. Have a great day guys, and take care. 

[thatgamefromthatad]

Mobile Game Review - Helix Waltz (Recommended by @raimi)

🎻 What is this app? Helix Waltz is a dress up game with an elaborate storyline that heavily involves character interactions. On the App Store it’s described as a “thrilling ballroom drama set in Baroque style dress,” which I think accurately reflects the sort of vintage European court-style setting the game takes place in. The setting also has fantasy elements, including characters of different “races” such as elves and people with animal ears and tails called Orens.

The game follows a main storyline as well as various side storylines and has a large cast of characters with their own personalities and preferences, all of whom you can build up your relationship with, which will affect their interactions with you depending on the level of favor you have with them. Rather than playing out in a linear set of stages or chapters, the story progresses as you accept and complete missions and attend balls where you have the chance to encounter other characters attending the same ball. There’s a bit of freedom in that sense where you can attend any of the available balls you want and encounter any of the characters that are there without necessarily following the main storyline, building up favor and getting to know anyone you want.

The dress up part is structured somewhat similarly to other dress up games I’ve played - there are various items in different categories (hairstyles, headwear, dresses, shoes, different types of accessories, etc.) with different attributes and rarities that will affect your “chic” level at any ball or other outing you attend, as well as how other characters perceive you depending on their preferences. You can have “beauty contests” with other characters you encounter at balls that compares your outfit’s chic level to theirs and there are other parts of the game where your outfits can compete with others players’. You can gain new dress up items through completing quests and through a gacha-type mechanic where you draw from different sets of potential items.

📝 Review Summary: The sheer number of different characters you can interact with in this game is very impressive, and it’s definitely entertaining getting to know them all and try to build relationships with them. I definitely found myself getting invested in certain characters and wanting to progress through the storyline so I could learn more. The art in this game is also very beautiful, which includes both the character designs and clothing items.

The follower who recommended this game noted that there is queer representation, including a trans character, which is a positive aspect, but I noticed there was not a lot of BIPOC representation, specifically a lack of characters with dark skin and limited options to have dark for your own character. The default character you play is white with very pale skin, and from my understanding from doing a little research, skin color changes are included as makeup items which definitely seems wrong, not only because you have to get your hands on the right item to have darker skin but because skin color as makeup seems to imply blackface, even if that’s completely unintentional (the makeup items in this game aren’t technically just makeup - they also change the shape of facial features). I definitely think this game should add different base skin tones, as well as characters who aren’t all super pale.

Full review below:

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👍What’s good about this app? The enormous cast of characters in this game and the multi-faceted system involved in gaining favor with them and getting to know them are definitely this game’s biggest assets, in my opinion. Each character has their own unique personality, backstory, style, relationships and role within the in-game society, but what’s really enticing is the fact that the story tends to build up a bit of mystery and intrigue about different characters and families/factions, which motivates you even more to get close with certain NPCs and learn the different secrets they hold. The game is pretty immersive that way in the sense that your goal of building up enough trust and prestige to gain access to the most interesting intel/gossip aligns with the main character’s goal of integrating and positioning herself strategically amidst higher society.

That sense of immersion also comes through in the way the game is structured to allow you to interact pretty freely with the characters rather than following a linear path from one encounter to another. You encounter other characters similarly to how you would if you really were a young noble in this sort of society - by wandering around ballrooms or other settings and seeing who you run into or seeking out those that you already have some level of relationship with. You can even get letters from them! You can choose to follow closely to the main plot, or pick your favorite characters and go out of your way to interact with them, or a mixture of both. This game really focuses around character interactions in a way I’ve never personally seen before, and it’s very impressive - and fun!

Another great aspect of this game is the art, which of course is an important aspect for any dress up game. I’m not very well-versed in fashion in general, but I can say from an average Joe perspective that the clothing items and outfit sets are overall just very pleasing to look at and give me that sort of mouthwatery fashion-p*rn feeling whenever I see some extravagant “look” whether it be from real life, a game or any other sort of media. You could say I’m easily pleased though since I can say that about just about any other dress up game I’ve played or been widely exposed to (Love Nikki, Time Princess etc.). One thing I think is especially cool in this game is the perfume category which I can best describe as creating a kind of animated aura around your character that differs in appearance depending on the perfume. This works well with the fantasy-type setting of the game and gives a little extra magical oomph to the outfits. Other outfit pieces can also be animated, like jewelry that sparkles for example, which is also a nice touch.

The last positive thing I’d like to mention is the theme song of this game that plays in the main menu (and pretty much everywhere else except outings), it’s so beautiful and I love it so much I added it to my Spotify playlist I listen to every day lol. The song is Sans Toi by Sarah Natasha Warne if you’re curious.

In the video below you can see a perfume item in action creating a galaxy-like aura around the character, and hear a short clip of the song as well.

[Video Description: A screen recording showing a fully dressed-up character wearing a luxurious red white and gold robe over an ornate black and white collared top with a red vest and loose-fitting brown pants that have two golden stripes at the end of each pant leg. They are holding a sword, have long blond hair tied in a high-set ponytail that drapes over their left shoulder and have a large, circular golden ornament position behind their head resembling a sun or halo. They are wearing dark stockings and black high heels, and there is a sparkling, swirling aura around them with streams of light changing color from blue to purple flowing toward them. The rest of the character and clothing is still except for jewelry and accessories that sparkle and glow and some golden parts of the clothing that shimmer.]

👎 What’s wrong with this app? There are a few minor flaws with this app such as a glitch(?) I experienced a few times where I was talking with one character and another character suddenly appeared and then disappeared, which I’m pretty sure was a glitch because after it happened for some reason I wasn’t able to complete any of my goals at the ball. Also if you don’t have a great internet connection it can be very frustrating because the game will freeze often, although I can’t criticize this that much since my internet connection just sucks and I’ve experienced this with other games before that are just highly reliant on having a constant internet connection.

Probably my main problem with this game is the lack of diversity in skin tones, both in the cast of characters and in your options for your own character. Like I said there are dozens of characters in this game but from what I’ve seen so far they almost all have pale/light skin. I don’t really think the setting of this game is an excuse considering it’s a fantasy setting and there are definitely characters from different regions or backgrounds but they all just happen to have very light skin. Another reason I think there should definitely be more diversity is that there are definitely themes of racial discrimination in the story - some characters will spout stereotypes and hateful comments about other races, in reference to fantasy races or other social groups in the game, and I’m definitely not saying the targets of those comments should be dark-skinned, I just feel like if you’re going to touch on those subjects but have little to no representation of the people who experience that kind of discrimination in real-life, it seems a bit hypocritical. As a disclaimer I am mixed-race (East Asian and white) and semi-white passing with pale skin so I’m not an authority on the skin tone issue specifically but my opinion as someone reviewing this game is that there’s no reason to not have more diversity in the game, even regardless of whether it involves the themes that I mentioned.

Below is just a handful of the NPCs but as I scrolled through the list pretty much everyone had pale/light skin, Gedanh is the NPC with the darkest skin tone as far as I know:

As far as a lack of diversity in selecting a skin tone for your own character, that didn’t specifically stand out to me at first considering the main character is a pre-established character and not as much of a self-insert as in other games like Time Princess, but the fact that you can change your facial features using “makeup items” and skin tone is also locked to certain makeup items doesn’t seem fair, since it makes whiteness the default and limits darker skin tones to these specific items and corresponding makeup looks. I’m not sure what adding diverse base skin tones would look like from a programming perspective for this game but with everything else this game has going on that is so complex and impressive I feel like there’s not an excuse in this day and age to exclude something as basic as different skin colors.

While the lack of diversity is definitely my biggest criticism of the game, I’ll just add that another flaw is that many aspects of the game can be confusing and despite a pretty lengthy series of tutorial quests that teach you about different parts of the game, I still have some confusion after playing for a while. For example I’m still not even completely sure if winning a beauty contest against a character strengthens your relationship with them, and I had to look at the Helix Waltz wiki to learn how to investigate NPCs’ preferences and exactly how remaking clothes works etc. The wiki and other players are a great resource, but having more guidance in-game, even if it’s in the Help/FAQ section (which I checked and still didn’t have all the info I needed), would be an improvement.

🪞Full list of features (there are a lot but I’ll try to cover them to the best of my ability):

Storyline (main plot, side plots that unlock when you strengthen your relationships with characters and event plots)

Quests (there are quests that go along with the plot or events as well as daily quests. The daily quests are more simple such as “talk to X amount of NPCs” or “attend X amount of balls” while the other quests involve having interactions with specific characters, wearing specific dress up items to certain events, etc.)

Dress up (you dress up for every ball or other outing you attend. Each ball will have a different clothing attribute, such as a certain color or style, that increases your chic points if you wear items with the corresponding tag. Different characters also have style preferences but you need to investigate to find out each character’s preference. In addition to dress up before events, the mirror section of the main interface allows you to make whatever outfit you want with the items you have, which will be the outfit your character wears during scenes outside of outings. There are different categories of items corresponding to different parts of the outfit and for some categories you can wear more than one item from the same category, such as wearing a different bracelet on each wrist)

Balls (this is one of the two main ways you will interact with characters and complete quests. There are a few balls you can choose to attend at any given time, hosted by a specific family or faction, with specific characters attending that you can check before you enter the ball. Once you enter the ball and dress up, you can choose to approach a certain character if that option is available - I think you can only approach characters directly if you’ve already talked to them at the ball or if you are wearing an outfit they like but I’m not sure about that part - or you can choose “wander around” and have the chance to encounter different characters who are attending)

Other outings (in addition to balls there are other places in the game where you can encounter other characters, such as the slum and the tavern, and these outings work similarly to balls in terms of character interactions)

Conversation (for basic conversation you pick from a selection of topics and you can gain favor with a certain character by correctly picking the topic they prefer. There is dialog to read for every conversation although these are stock conversations that repeat so you’ll usually want to just speed through them. When you increase your relationship with a character you can unlock special conversations with them that are more unique and tied to the plot)

Q&A (sometimes a character will ask you a question and depending on if they like your answer it can boost your favor with them)

Beauty contests (while conversing with a character sometimes you can have a beauty contest against them comparing your outfit to theirs, and if you win you get points that I believe go toward earning in-game currency - another thing I’m not 100% sure about. I think you can only have a beauty contest with female characters but there is at least one male character I’ve been able to have a beauty contest with. Sometimes a character will immediately force you into a beauty contest when you encounter them)

Dancing (sometimes when interacting with a character at a ball you’ll have the option to dance with them which opens up a short memory-based minigame. I think completing the minigame correctly yields similar rewards to winning a beauty contest. I think you can only dance with male characters as I’ve never had the option come up with female characters so far)

Gathering intel (intel is a resource in the game that is used to learn more about characters and that can be exchanged with characters for rewards. While wandering around a ball you may have the chance to eavesdrop on characters and gain intel)

Gift Box/gacha mechanic (The Gift Box section of the game is where you can draw from different gacha-type pools for items and resources. Different pools take different currencies and have different sets of items)

Remaking, dyeing and enchanting clothes (you can change the style or color of some clothing items if you collect the right resources, which changes both the item’s outward appearance and attributes that go toward chic points/gaining favor with different characters. You can also enchant clothing items, which changes their appearance and increases their chic points)

Events (there are limited-time events such as events that offer limited-time items/gacha pools and limited-time quests)

Illusion Contests (one way you can compete with other players in the game rather than NPCs. You are given preset clothes items to choose from in order to put together an outfit, and can give the outfit a name. Your outfit is scored based on a voting system where two outfits are shown and players can vote for one or the other. You get rewards based on how many votes you get and you also get rewarded for voting on other outfits)

Championship (another way to compete with others players using your owned items rather than preset items. I have not participated in the championship myself yet but from my understanding you make one outfit to defend against other players challenging you and then make outfits to challenge other players’ defending outfits. The players you have the option to challenge will be the same rank as you so the competition is balanced and I believe this competition is based on the attributes of your items and a theme set for the current championship cycle, a bit more like a NPC beauty contest than the voting-based Illusion Contests.)

⭐️ Overall Rating: 4/5 (this would definitely be a 5/5 game if they fixed the racial diversity issue but it’s unfortunate that a game that’s otherwise so complex and engaging - and has LGBTQ+ representation - drops the ball in this area. I definitely hope they at least add the ability to have different base skin tones in the future.)

I really enjoyed this game so thank you to @raimi for suggesting it! If anyone else has any game review suggestions feel free to send them 🥳

[supernaturalnovelsandmore]

Supernatural Novel: The Unholy Cause

Welcome to my review of the fifth Supernatural novel, The Unholy Cause

Author: Joe Schreiber

Timeline: Set after Episode 5.08 Changing Channels but before Episode 5.16 Dark Side of the Moon

Location: Mission's Ridge, Georgia

Synopsis: As the pressure mounts for the upcoming apocalypse, Sam and Dean head to the historic town of Mission's Ridge, GA, where the Civil War is less about the past and more about the present. With interference from Castiel, demons, and Judas Iscariot himself, how can Sam and Dean prevent a major catastrophe from befalling this small town?

Review: ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

Warning: Spoilers abound!

After the last book, I was really hoping to see an improvement in this one, and boy did I! I've finally hit the Supernatural tie-in novel I was hoping to read from the beginning! It read like an actual episode, I could hear the actors speaking through the character's words, and I really couldn't find anything that contradicted canon.

In addition, the actual storyline was compelling and the side characters interesting. With the other novels I've reviewed, it's taken me most of the day to read them because I kept getting distracted. This one, I read straight through without stopping. I love reading a book like that!

Side note: This novel does dive in to Christian theology and the story of Judas Iscariot (who betrayed Jesus). If you are uncomfortable delving into that portion of Christianity, you may not want to read the book or this review (though my review notes about that will be minimal).

Now, since I don't have any canon vs. non-canon comparisons to make, today's review is simply going to be a list of my favorite scenes and how certain scenes relate to what's going on during this period in Season 5.

Cameo!

Sam and Dean are informed of the case by one Rufus Turner! He's only in it for a brief bit, but he's still funny as heck asking the police to pay his dry-cleaning bill.

We get a nice character introduction of enigmatic (clueless) Castiel who's trying to heal Civil War reenactors who are understandably frightened of him. He's still searching for God at this point, but we also get this nice character beat for him:

"I walked the battlefields of the South a hundred and sixty years ago," Castiel replied, a faraway look entering his eyes. "I moved among the men and brought their souls to glory. And now..." Something moved over his face for just an instant, so rare and brief that Dean almost didn't catch it; a flicker of hope. "And now," he repeated, "I'm healing again."

Of course, Dean has to explain that none of the reenactors actually need healing and he goes back to being determined to find a 'First-order witness' - someone who broke bread with Jesus Christ.

I found this part surprising within the book, but as I thought about it, it made more sense. The TV series has to tread a very careful line with Christianity so as not to offend a bunch of viewers, but the books have a much smaller audience and can take these liberties. Personally, I was fine with it. They didn't go too deep and stuck with the witness being Judas (who doesn't exactly have a great reputation to begin with).

There's a fantastic brotherly moment where Sam shares the sheriff's name (Jack Daniels) and they then go back and forth trying to guess what this Jack person is like i.e., fat vs. skinny, bald vs. hairy...

Dean: "Nam vet. Buford Pussar type. From Walking Tall." Sam: "Deliverance refugee. Civil citations all over his desk."

One of things I love about this book is the brother's relationship. This banter and other character beats really feel authentic as opposed to the prior novels. (I won't spoil what the sheriff is actually like - needless to say, they play a major role in the book.)

Just a few pages later from this great banter, we're back to the drama as Sam and Dean argue about a nightmare Sam had that he can't remember, but which could be relevant to the case.

"What's this about Dean?" Sam demanded, "Is it about you not trusting me? Because if it is, there's not a whole lot of places we can go from there." "Yeah, you're my brother," Dean said. "But you're also Lucifer's prom dress, and if he's seeding your dreams with hints about the master plan, then maybe it might be a good idea for you to look at 'em as close as possible. That's all I'm saying."

And of course, Dean gets concerned about Sam as they split up to cover more ground. It's music to my ears! There are a number of other conversations like this that really emphasize the strained relationship Sam and Dean display in Season 5.

Another surprising character beat is the influence of Lucifer on Sam because as he's doing research at the local historical society, Sam (and the historian) are surprised to find out he can read Coptic, an ancient Egyptian language. It startles Sam and once again emphasizes how different he is.

At a particularly gruesome crime scene (a mass grave), there's a brief moment with Dean that really shines as he looks down on the skeletons in the mass grave and finds a similarity to what he did in Hell:

Because that was what he did after spending years down there, doing what he'd done... Through sheer force of will, Dean shoved those notions aside...Now more than ever he didn't want that experience contaminating the way he looked at the world... not that he had a choice. Hell had been his Vietnam. It had stamped its mark on him for all eternity, and no amount of denial or self-imposed ignorance was going to change that.

There's an additional moment of traumatized Dean that I wish they could have shown in the tv series:

Sam: "Are those bloodhounds?" Dean didn't answer... When Sam finally caught a look at his brother's face, he saw that Dean's cheeks and forehead had gone absolutely white, as if every drop of blood had been sucked away... "They're not hellhounds, Dean, they're just dogs..." Dean didn't answer. He was still listening to the barking and howling noises coming closer, crashing through the undergrowth. He seemed paralyzed by the sounds.

There are more to these Dean passages, (too much to copy), but I really like that we see actual effects of past experiences.

There's also a nice scene with Sam and a young teenager that really highlights his ability to connect with kids around that age (of which we see later in the TV series):

"My brother and I grew up without a Mom, too," Sam said... "It wasn't always easy... Not everybody gets that." "I still dream about her sometimes, you know? Even though I was young when she... when it happened," Nate blinked at Sam. "Weird, huh?" "Are they good dreams?" "Yeah." "Then it's good. That's your way of remembering her."

The last third of the book is very action-oriented and has multiple instances of hurt Sam and hurt Dean, with the requisite caring from each brother.

Once again, I've gone on too long, but I'll end with a couple of favorites: Humor:

The sheriff glanced out the window, (referring to Baby) "And haul that piece of crap car to the impound lot. I don't want it cluttering up my street." "Woah!" Dean snapped, a sudden rush of anger rising in his face. "Watch your damn mouth. You can't just---"

Drama:

"This is blood money," Sam reached into his pocket and pulled out the Shekel. "Bobby says the only way anybody gets their hand on this..." The rest of the sentence was getting stuck in his chest, and he made himself finish it, "is by betraying someone you love." Dean stared at him. "Dean..." "Look," Dean broke in. "Don't get too hung up on it, okay? It doesn't necessarily mean anything," he stood up and brushed off his jeans. "Whatever happens between us, we'll deal with it then..."

Thanks again for reading! I'll be back again next week with War of the Sons!

[phoenixfeathersinfall]

The Dax Debacle: Re-Imagining S7 of “Star Trek Deep Space Nine”

*This post came about after a few discussions with Lee @creativilee on how the stories of Jadzia and Ezri could have been adapted to better serve both of those characters and respect the work of both actresses! Thanks to them for all their help, encouragement, and serving as a springboard! Anything in italics is theirs!

For all of us DS9 fans, the finale season can be rather fraught for several reasons, many of the biggest revolving around the transition from Jadzia Dax to Ezri Dax, henceforth called “The Dax Debacle.” Many folks seem to love one and hate the other, which is a huge shame because both characters brought amazing potential and storylines to the table, but the writers really fumbled in some key aspects. This sure-to-be-long-winded meta is an attempt between myself and Lee to fix some of those fumbles and give both characters the storylines they deserved. So, let’s get to it!

First, a little behind-the scenes context.

Why Two Dax-es?

To begin with, it’s important to acknowledge that the Dax Debacle was largely unplanned, and the writing often reflects the ways in which Nicole de Boer was shoehorned in as Terry Ferrell’s replacement, just as the character of Ezri was deliberately put forward as Jadzia’s replacement as the next host of Dax. What happened?

It is widely believed, based on various interviews Terry gave during the show’s run, that the set of DS9 was inhospitable to her, placing her in situations of harassment and abuse. By the time of S7, due to this as well as the sheer grueling schedule of the show, she wanted to be moved from a permanent member of the cast into a reoccurring role like that of Andrew Robinson. When it proved fruitless to negotiate this, Terry decided to leave the show, though she explicitly stated she had not wanted Jadzia’s character to be killed on her departure.

Though the writers went through with the decision to kill Jadzia, they still wanted the character of Dax to remain on the crew, and due to the way Trill physiology was designed, they decided to do this with another host, similar to how Jadzia was initially seen as the continuation of Sisko’s old friend Curzon.

Enter Nicole de Boer as Ezri Dax, a young unjoined Trill who had never intended to be a host at all, and the story of her adjustment to carrying on the Dax legacy.

The Story’s Seed

It’s definitely worth noting that the initial conception of Ezri’s story, the young suddenly-joined Trill joined under trying circumstances who has to re-discover herself has a lot of potential! It could have been extremely poignant and moving, in something of the same vein as Seven of Nine rediscovering herself on “Voyager.” Unfortunately, the choices made regarding how she became the next Dax make it hard to appreciate Ezri on her own merits. Both we as the audience and the other characters are constantly seeing Jadzia in her place. It stymied who she was able to be as a character and how the audience was able to receive her. The way she was written invites constant comparisons, often to Ezri’s detriment in her initial interactions with the crew.

Lee said some things extremely well here: “Ezri as a character was hindered a lot by being made ‘Jadzia's replacement’ instead of ‘the next Dax,’ a Dax in her own right. While Jadzia definitely had Curzon's legacy to live with, it was absolutely not all she was, and she interacted with it as such, but Ezri wasn’t written with the same care. She isn't ‘Ezri Dax’ she's ‘Ezri, the one who replaced Jadzia.’ She was entirely written as a replacement, and it shows.”

Fumbles, Fumbles, Fumbles

Let’s review some things that went sideways in Ezri’s arc, so we can see it for the purposes of our rewrite.

The “I'm the new host of your dead friends symbiont" aspect is very difficult to watch. It’s hard to say if the writers wanted to lean into this aspect deliberately, but even if they did, I don’t think they ended up hitting the emotional notes they wanted to.

Ezri doesn’t seem to get much training from what we can tell, and being joined is a huge change! We learned from Jadzia’s arc that initiates often train for years. It’s wartime, but she still really did get thrown into the deep end!

The audience can’t approach Ezri on her own merits, but quite often, the crew isn’t doing that, either. There’s the caveat that they’re grieving and it’s an odd situation to be in, but! Sisko initially tries to interact with her in the same way he would Jadzia (calling her old man, which upsets her a great deal,) Julian flirts with her with the same intensity he did Jadzia in early seasons, Worf seems to only be seeing his dead wife any time he looks at her.

Ezri is given a role as ship’s counselor when she is in no way emotionally able to handle the psychological difficulties of others when she’s going through so much herself.

Her return to Deep Space 9 (the station) seems to contradict what we know about Trill culture. Joining is meant to give the symbiont as many life experiences as possible, and re-association (to various degrees) is anything from strongly discouraged to forbidden. Ezri goes right back to living Jadzia’s life in some ways, in the same place with the same people. Jadzia wasn’t able to resume her relationship with Lenara Khan, but Ezri finds herself being intimate with Jadzia’s widower.

Our alternatives and fixes for the arcs of Jadzia and Ezri fall into three broad categories, which we’ll break down here:

1. Ezri Not-Dax? (Ezri is still joined unexpectedly, but rather than the Dax symbiont, she is host to another symbiont which needed her.)

2. Where in the World is Jadzia Dax? (If Ezri isn’t a Dax, we have to figure out what to do with the Dax we know!)

3. The Legacy Question (The age-old Trill questions of new hosts, old hosts, and interpersonal relationships.)

Ezri Who? Ezri Not-Dax!

The best solution Lee and I were able to find was the idea that Ezri was joined under similar circumstances to canon, but not to Dax itself.

This is still largely workable for the story we want to tell, because, as Lee explains: “The Dax symbiont isn't key to her character, except to affect her relationships with the crew. Her main personal conflicts are about being joined before she was ready, not about being joined to Dax. She still would have worked without the Dax symbiont.”

For the sake of convenience, let’s call this hypothetical new symbiont Nal. So, Ezri Tigan —> Ezri Nal.

Where in the World is Jadzia Dax?

Theres 3 different paths we could take with Jadzia!

If Terry was made a reoccurring member of the cast, the writers could easily have put Jadzia into the position of being given a transfer assignment. Though Jadzia might initially struggle to accept this because of her loyalty to her friends, “with things picking up in wartime, it's believable that Starfleet would want the people more familiar with what dangers are on the other side of the wormhole to be spread around and maximize the number of ships and stations that are prepared for it. Maybe Jadzia acts as a representative and goes around giving lectures/debriefings on that stuff. This situation puts us in a position to get frequent updates about Jadzia, even if we don't see her again!"

If Terry did not stay on at all, Jadzia as a character could still have died, but the Dax symbiont finds a new host back on Trill, away from the station. Maybe we get updates about this Dax because Ezri trained with them for a bit, or the new Dax reaches out to Sisko from time to time, since he was well-acquainted with two previous Dax-es.

The option I like best for purely self-indulgent reasons would be if Terry stayed on for one more season and was present on the station when Ezri arrived, serving as a mentor to her.

The Legacy Question

Since the “TNG” days, Star Trek likes to experiment with Trill, and what happens in relationships between joined Trill and non-Trill, particularly in the case of a symbiont with a new host. We might assume this was part of the writer’s intent with the Dax Debacle, but it went over much better in the move from Curzon to Jadzia then it did in the move from Jadzia to Ezri.

Other options for exploring “the legacy question:”

“If they wanted to explore the whole ‘new host when the previous host was close to you’ thing, they could have had an episode that went into detail about Sisko meeting Jadzia for the first time after the death of Curzon.” Or, just having Sisko reflect more on the changes and developments in their relationship as time passes. They did this quite well initially when Jadzia first came aboard, but dropped it soon after the first season for the most part and left it to our amazing fic writers to pick it back up.

The character of Curzon is often used as a vehicle for explaining Jadzia’s connection to Klingon culture, but he also gives us access to a wealth of relationships which could be used to explore the legacy question. “Curzon had so many friends, and we see a variety of reactions from them, particularly with his Klingon friends. Some of them immediately fall back into that friendship, some of them struggle to recognize that Jadzia may not be Curzon, but she is still Dax, and has a lot of Curzon in her.” Keeping that thread going would have been intriguing also.

The Life of Ezri Nal

Here’s how some elements of Ezri’s story might look with the “Nal” symbiont.

Ezri is joined rather unprepared when a medical emergency puts the life of a symbiont at risk and the host is unable to be saved. For convenience, let’s call this symbiont Nal.

Ezri was always interested in Starfleet Service, especially in working as a counselor (which she studied on her own rather than gaining the knowledge through the memories of past hosts.) She assigned to the station by the Trill Symbiosis Commission largely because there are people there who will know how to help a newly-joined Trill; namely Sisko, Julian, and Jadzia.

Jadzia+ Ezri

Being the only other Trill on the station that we know about, Jadzia puts herself in a mentor role to Ezri, helping her adjust to her new life and consciousness. Her personality and experiences make her perfect for the job!

As a bonus, we get to see how the mentor and mentee relarionships between joined Trill and initiates work.

We also set up some fun parallels! Take Jadzia, who had to try so hard to be joined, and it was a huge goal in her life (to the point where she applied again to the Symbiosis Comission after being rejected once, which is played as something that basically never happens,) versus Ezri who was perfectly happy to be just herself and ended up taking on this responsibility without being ready and without feeling like she had much choice because of how Trill culture regards symbionts.

From the little we know about Jadzia before she was joined, she was somewhat like Ezri-bookish, shy, anxious-and she initially struggled to adjust to the likes of Curzon. But now, she’s gown so confident in who she is, for the most part, and she’d be the perfect person to guide Ezri and help her find joy in her new life.

But, she also understands having difficulties with aspects of being joined, for example, her conflict in whether she should rejoin with Lenara Khan, or how she struggled in the aftermath of the discovery of the cover-up regarding Joran.

In short, Jadzia helps keep Ezri as mentally and emotionally healthy as she can be.

Julian+Ezri

Being CMO, Julian helps look after Ezri and ensure she’s physically well; after all, it’s what he does best! “Having Julian as the Chief Medical Officer on board would be a big draw for the Trill. He's even performed a symbiont joining and removal procedure. He had to be very familiar with Trill biology, meaning a newly joined host would be relatively safe and well-cared-for on board. And, I’m sure that there's a big chemical change in Trill when the get joined, and adjusting to that would be hard!”

Julian can also sympathize having something done you didn’t want or weren’t ready for, and can help her process those feelings. “ They both have complicated relationships with their parents regarding their parents’ expectations and their own desires and feelings, which would be interesting!”

In some ways, Julian can serve as another mentor to Ezri. It would be an interesting shift to watch Julian, who is often portrayed as the the youngest or most “green” be able to mentor and guide someone else. “This is also a good way to show Julian has grown and matured, without having to have other characters just say it.”

If we still followed their romance route, having Ezri as Ezri Nal rather than Dax could have make the relationship between her and Julian sit a lot better with audiences. With a rewrite, Julian is not chasing the “ghost” of Jadzia; rather he’s meeting Ezri for the person she is, on her own terms. This also prevents a regression of his character back to the way he chased Jadzia in the early seasons, and instead honors the relationship of treasured friendship that Julian and Jadzia built.

Sisko+Ezri

As he is with many of his younger crew, Sisko takes naturally to the role of a mentor and father figure with Ezri, again meeting her for the person she is, on her own terms. He serves as a valuable guide to ship life and helps her get acquainted with station staff and residents.

Like with Jake, Sisko encourages Ezri to find herself by being her own person.

Ezri tries to take up cooking as a hobby with Sisko, but the experiences of past hosts mean her skills vary wildly depending on what they are making.

Other Relationships

Garak helps Ezri figure out how she wants to dress, often integrating different styles from past hosts. (He rather jumps at the chance.) Ezri still has her difficulties helping him as a counselor, but her additional training and the lack of complications from the Dax symbiont make things easier. They also get to know each other through Julian.

In this Ideal Timeline, Ziyal survives and meets Ezri. They relate well to each other, both of them not really knowing where they fit and grappling with someone else’s legacy, but they have each other for support. Ziyal has given her portraits as gifts.

She has a similar dynamic with Jake, who is trying to figure out how to honor his parents while being his own man. Ezri starts writing memoirs of sorts about her past lives on his suggestion.

Surprisingly, she gets on with Nog, too. They’re both doing things unexpected and feeling like they’re going to be the first in something big.

She isn’t especially close to Worf, but he assures her that the sacrifices she made for Nal are ones to be honored, and becomes rather fond of Ezri due to Jadzia’s influence.

Thanks for reading this super-long meta! Please tell Lee and I your thoughts on this rewrite!

[hydraulicfluidinmyteapot]

Pirates of the Caribbean

This is an ask from @shrigma-male​, but i accidentally deleted the ask.. so sorry! I am high key excited to get an ask about this topic, as the Pirates of the Caribbean ride is probably one of my earliest animatronic centric obsessions. not only is it one of the earliest and most impressive feats of Imagineering, it also remains solid to this day. it houses a great many iconic animatronic figurines, all of which work together in perfect harmony to capture beautifully life filled scenes of a cohesive storyline. Its individual ride concept was so strong that it birthed a line of clones and even a famous movie franchise. isn’t that sick? a RIDE was the key source material for a whole movie series! but it’s unsurprising, with the time and care poured into the ride. Unfortunately, or fortunately depending on how you think about it, the ride is JAM PACKED so there is a LOT to talk about. This will only be a super brief post information-wise, but who knows? There may be more to come if this performs well. Apologies, my life’s not going great at the moment and i don’t have a lot of spare time so this is not as high a quality as i would like it to be.

Here’s my fast fact file on it!

Debut: March 16, 1967

Withdrawal: All rides are still operating

Attraction: The Pirates of the Caribbean 

Locations: Disneyland, Magic Kingdom, Tokyo Disneyland, Disneyland Paris, Shanghai Disney (but this one’s heavily modified)

Attraction Type: Dark ride

Riders Per Vehicle: 23–24

Number of vehicles:  50

Animatronics: 119 ish but it depends on the ride version

Ride videos: The entire ride varies from version to version and different people want to see different parts. i’m leaving you guys to find your own ride videos. it’s a very popular ride, just type on in to youtube and you’ll find heaps of nice high quality ones. 

The thing that stands out about this ride is the theming and the sheer amount of effort put in to creating an immersive environment. the ride houses an impressive 119 audio animatronics, 53 of which are animals. There are 630,000 gallons of water in the ride (original Disneyland) and takes three whole days to drain. there are over 40,000 gold coins in the treasure room scene alone. It holds what could possibly be considered Disney’s first themed restaurant which can be seen at the start of the ride. It is objectively one of the coolest things I’ve ever ridden. I want to call specific attention to the boat scene, where cannons fare at each other from opposite ships, creating glowing impacts and throwing water about. the first time I rode it it ensnared my attention and completely suspended my disbelief.The ride system is based on the one used in it’s a small world, due to that rides incredible success in debuting a boat-based transport system. Although I hate it’s a small world with a burning passion and refuse to write anything on it, I must be forced to admit that it did wonders as a test on how to create a good dark ride, emphasising key features such as a high rider capacity, boat-based transport system, and proving that animatronics are an incredibly attractive key event. Since the 60’s when it debuted, the Pirates of the Caribbean ride has gone through many changes throughout its location, including entire scenes being added and removed. but what it has maintained throughout its historic run time is its notoriety and splendour. the key change that I will bring up is the 2006 and 2007 renovations that include more theming from the very successful movie franchise. slightly unrelated, but the song “Yo ho, a pirate’s life for me” was actually first written for the ride. The rides are all being constantly updated in minor ways whether it’s slightly improving the animatronics, touching up background details or changing costuming. I’ll attach here a brief sort of timeline of the ride that I’ve whipped up here, but it only touches on the most notable modifications. sorry about how crap-tier it is..

Now, to talk more specifically about animatronics. The animatronics used on this ride are some of the earliest made by Disney. some are really quite basic, with their full range of motions being a singular full body action such as raising and lowering out of a barrel, but others move heads and arms in (sort of) lifelike actions. Some are newer, (specifically captain Jack Sparrow), but most are the original ones from the 60’s. One of my (and everyone’s tbh) favourites is the redheaded lady. She is (very originally) named Redd. Previously she was being sold off for auction, but in 2018 she was swapped to being an auctioneer. She has stunning red curls and a beautiful dress to match, and now holds a gun. here’s a little before and after.

 in the same refurbishment that changed her the mist screen in the tunnel before the fort battle was removed and replaced with a pirate in a cage who turns into a skeleton via an optical trick as well as an octopus playing with some medallions, along with the original 1967 narration about cursed treasure being restored. Her new version is based off none other than Anne Bonny herself (worth a google, she’s a fucking BOSS (like seriously!! Queer history icon!!! LOOK 👏 HER 👏 UP 👏 )) . She’s also displayed in dead man’s cove in a portrait, which I think is kinda neat. Her Paris version is completely silent, but the others yell about selling rum. Sadly I have never actually seen the new Redd in person, as I have only ridden the ride in Tokyo (where she is still being sold).

Now, the barker bird! oh how I love him so <3 he’s a little green pirate parrot, who spent his days crying about the ride. he was originally in the queue area but got kicked outside eventually to help deal with crowd control. he was then gotten rid of in 2006 in the big movie refurb. He was remarkably similar to the original barker bird who resided outside of the Enchanted Tikki Room; however, the pirate version has a peg leg, eye patch, tattoo on his chest and wondrously villainous hat. he was originally based off of Captain Flint, the parrot from Treasure Island. It is theorised that he has a skeletal clone inside the ride; the parrot belonging to “the Dirty Feet pirate”. 

When you first get on the ride, the first animatronic you come across is Old Joe. he is an animatronic character used in multiple different attractions, including Liberty Belle Riverboat, The Western River and Mark Twain Riverboat. in each version, he lives in a shack and is associated with the banjo. I say associated because it is actually a really common misconception that he actually plays the banjo. he does not, it is just a dark scene and there is banjo music playing around him. you can see the tip of his pipe glowing as you approach it in the ride, lit up alongside the fireflies. he is a small taste of what is to come.

Barbossa replaced the original pirate captain of The Wicked Wench in the boat battle scene in the mass movie renovation. he is my tied favourite with the redhead, as his dialog adds so much to the scene. his character moves in a beautiful fashion, lit up by a spotlight. His face is artfully painted, capturing what I believe to be the most human expression in the entire ride. His boat is fighting a Castillo del Morro fortress of Isla Tesoro, whilst busy searching for treasure and presumably captain jack sparrow. in 2011 his WDW version’s outfit was swapped over to his privateer uniform from On Stranger Tides, to keep the ride tied to the movies. What can be considered quite odd is that in Paris’s later renovation, the Captain did not replace the Wicked Wench captain, and was rather added in to a scene at the end of the ride, in the skeleton grotto. he is standing on the shipwreck beside the skeleton helmsman, carrying a lantern. 

The auctioneer. I don’t like him. greasy man. his eyes are wild. He’s originally voiced by Paul Frees (an icon, a legend) and is inspired by Captain Bartholomew Roberts (considered the most successful pirate in the golden age of piracy. He is also a pirate from the ship The Wicked Wench, and his auction is set up near a canteen called "La Cantina”. very creative. He was originally selling brides (human trafficking, not very snazzy) but now he sells chickens he stole from townspeople. however, this is unsuccessful. In the Paris version, instead of the chickens he is trying to sell a painting of Jean Laffite. Funnily enough, Jean is one of Disney’s sort of “stand in” pirate characters that they frequently just use whenever they need a pirate to slide in. Unfortunately, the auctioneer is always kept relatively up to date with the shiniest, newest technology that Disney can spare, and is always one of the most advanced figures on the ride. doesn’t deserve it, he’s slimy and I don’t like him. I should probably mention that he doesn’t actually have a name other than the auctioneer. There’s also a clone of him used in the haunted mansion for the duelling animatronics. loser. 

This is a very long post, so I shall cut it here. I will leave you with an image gallery, further reading and a possible promise of a part two if this post does well. Thank you!

(ok so i actually haven’t got any further reading gathered yet. give me like 6 hours and ill fix it in an edit. i promise. i just want to get this post out asap)