#'it's bullshit that they make holmes in love with her when he should be in love with watson 🥺'

[lisbeth-kk]

May Prompts (24) Imperfect

The Luckiest Girl in the World (chapter 24)

Summary: Rosie meets a young man in Paris. Love is in the air but one thing gnaws on Rosie's nerves. She need to warn Timothy of her protective relatives without making him run for the hills.

Twenty-Four Years Old

When my first year in Paris was coming to an end, I went with a group from my school to a party. It was held in a big apartment that apparently belonged to some ridiculously rich aunt. The amount of red wine I’d drunk before we arrived, made sure I didn’t remember the details of the family tree.

What I do remember was the young man reading French poems with a British accent, and afterwards, the beginning of an interesting story about two men finding each other in a dream, and later apparently meeting in real life. I desperately wanted to hear more, but when I got him talking, he said that he wasn’t sure the idea was good enough to pursue.

“You wrote this?” I asked baffled. “I thought it was brilliant!”

“That’s probably the Pinot talking,” he retorted with a lopsided grin. “People normally say that it’s utter bullshit.”

I huffed at this ludicrous statement.

“So, why read it out loud, then?” I challenged him.

“Dunno. Perhaps I hoped that someone like you may turn up and like it” he quipped.

“That’s the worst pickup line I’ve ever heard,” I muttered and rolled my eyes.

***

Timothy and I were thick as thieves after that evening, and it soon evolved into more than friendship. He was studying literature and creative writing at Sorbonne Nouvelle, which was located quite close to Marguerite’s building. After our first official date, I pondered bringing him to my place, but uncle’s surveillance made me reconsider. Dad and Papa planned on visiting soon, and I knew it was futile trying to hide anything from Papa.

You’d better prepare the poor sod, before meeting the British Inquisition, I thought with a grimace.

After David, Papa wouldn’t make the same mistake of failing to observe even the tiniest flaw.

We hadn’t talked about our families at all, because there were so many other topics that were interesting, but I knew time was running out. I decided that after a good meal with some wine, it would be the perfect time to tell him about my fiercely protective family.

Rinsing and eating mussels, is a sticky and quite down-to-earth affair, and a better opportunity would be hard to find, so I plunged in with both feet so to speak.

“I…um…think it’s time to tell you about my…family,” I started.

“All of them, or just your fathers?” Timothy said while dipping a bite of bread in the creamy sauce.

I almost dropped my spoon in surprise. Had I told him that I was raised by two men and no mother? Not to my knowledge. Perhaps some of my other friends…

“Rosie?” Timothy said softly.

“Do you know who they are? Have you…”

Timothy lifted his hands, motioning me to calm down.

“Sorry, I assumed you knew,” he murmured. 

“Knew what?” I snapped. “You’re worse than…”

“I know who you are, Rosamund Watson-Holmes. A dossier, I think will suffice as a description, was delivered to me by a courier after our first coffee date. Four “letters” from each of your watchdogs. I didn’t know there were so many ways to threaten a person…”

“Damn, them!” I exclaimed. “Always, they have to meddle just because I had one bad boyfriend. Jesus, they’re incorrigible.”

“No matter how imperfect you find them, they love you dearly, or should I say fiercely,” Timothy chuckled. “After the initial shock, I must say I found it quite amusing and adorable. Four grown men, with the careers they have, your dad even an ex-military, and they’re all softies. Your police uncle was probably the scariest, come to think of it. Not that he doesn’t love you to bits, but he was the only one who stayed somewhat professional. He certainly didn’t bring any medieval torture methods or mafia tendencies into the equation if I hurt you purposefully or otherwise.”

“Oh, God,” I growled utterly devasted of my protective relatives.

Timothy chose to call them The Fab Four, which still earns him stern looks, but I know the four protectors are quite proud of themselves.

Also available on AO3

@calaisreno @totallysilvergirl @keirgreeneyes @raina-at @helloliriels

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[deniigi]

hey random question that you don’t have to answer if you don’t wanna but like i’ve ran into some free time and was wondering what your top ten movies are? mostly so i could watch them lol

Ohhh interesting.

I can list out some of my favorites in no particular order. I would recommend most with them although some have some period typical bullshit so just be aware of that!.

1) Tekkonkinkreet

Based on an incredible manga called Black and White about 2 homeless boys, one of whom is autistic and the other of whom struggles to keep the first safe as he fights the mob and tries to carve out a home for them in an ever changing city

2) Song of the Sea

Beautifully done animated film about a little girl who is a selkie and her older brother who tries to bring her home when she gets lost.

3) Glass Onion/Knives Out

Love a real life Professor Layton/Sherlock Holmes situation without Holmes.

4) Annie (1982)

Makes me sob every fucking time at the end. Look I am a mess and am suseptible to adopted children feeling like they belong. Do not fall for the capitalist propaganda obvs.

5) Hello Dolly (comfort movie don't look at Me) and WallE which is Hello Dolly adjacent.

Louis Armstrong and Barbra Streisand should sing together for this whole movie. The whole thing. I wouldn't mind.

6) Now You See Me (2013) heist heist heist heist HEIST film

7) Pride and Prejudice (TV show, 1995)

This is my only accepted version of Pride and Prejudice. Colin Firth is the most supremely awkward Mr. Darcy, no one compares and no one shall convince me otherwise. I love how fast he talks in this but especially Lizzie's mother. Perfect characterization. No notes.

8) Men in Black (I)

Aliens.

9) Pacific Rim

More Aliens. But the comic visuals in a real life medium? Um THANK YOU. The score of this fucks so hard.

10) Lilies of the Field (1963)

Watched it recently and was perplexed/intrigued. Its about a traveling laborer who gets roped into helping out a bunch of German nuns in the middle of the desert. Def worth a watch if only because Sidney Poitier is/was the most handsome man ever. Otherwise it's an interesting piece of its time historically.

I realize that this is a wild list of films but I hope something on here perhaps speaks to you.

[am-i-tho]

can't sleep here are my ideas for sherlock adaptations/series 5 plans (disclaimer: I don't think a series 5 will happen neither do I want it to bc I know it'd be BULLSHIT but regardless)

series 5:

mockumentary style, I like the idea of someone (in universe) deciding to make a documentary about sherlock holmes's life and career, interviewing him and the people of his life 10 or so years from where we left off. (plus of john convincing him to do it and partnering up with the producers since he kind of dedicated a good bit of his life to document sherlock)

to me the ideal would be as much episodes as it'd be necessary but if I wanted to work out around the already established format, it'd be 4 episodes and each would treat the events of each season

first episode: how they met, what it was like getting to know each other, first impressions, life living together, their past and childhoods, delving on their feelings about moriarty's first appearance and how john kind of getting disillusioned with sherlock prior to it.

(I like the idea of mycroft being overlooked when discussing specificities bc of his government reputation and whatnot lmao)

second episode: their most memorable cases, the good years, going over dear memories and getting testimonies from molly and lestrade (I'd LOVE to hear Mrs Hudson too :( rip una🤍)

being a bit vague about irene adler(had to go to his blog to see how much he wrote about it lol) but giving more details ofc, talking about the baskerville, John teasing sherlock about being afraid and so "my body is only transport" back then; telling him off on camera over doing experiments on him and whatnot

then moving on to the fucking TRAGEDY and how john dealt with sherlock being discredited by the media, his own conflicting ideas; MAJOR LESTRADE SPEAKING SCENES HERE!!! (I'd like also to have Sally doing a little interview over the phone cause she wouldn't want to show her face but would definetly speak her piece)

third episode [first half]: john centric, him talking about grief, going over places and things he'd do, stuff he kept, meeting mary and how much she helped and was understanding etc; lestrade talking about the media slowly coming around, about Anderson going mad with guilt, about him thinking about him in crime scenes when trying to move on

(I'd LOVE to have Harry appearing and talking about how he was at the time from her perspective as his sister)

I'd like for molly to tell her piece and how it felt holding this secret for so long, and the cognitive dissonance over knowing he was alive and still grieving. (Also, I think it'd be nice for her to read out a written message that mycroft sent speaking about his own grief since he wouldn't appear on camera? maybe? idk)

then it'd move to sherlock speaking a bit about some stuff he did and how lonely and scary it was at the time, what he did to comfort himself, what was he thinking at the time ----> finishing with john and him talking over seeing each other again, the mixed feelings, sherlock getting whiplashed by reality. (mostly about what did it take for them to understand each other again bc that scene in the tube car was NOT ENOUGH)

[second half] going over the wedding, sherlock talking about his actual feeling at the time, the sinking feeling they both felt in the end of the episode, sherlock going back to drugs, John seeing him with Janine and the fake engagement. (Tho not really necessary if this time could be used for other things)

i REALLY don't know how they would/should deal with mary being the one who shot sherlock and all. maybe it'd be alright since she is already dead but I'm not sure. Plus I have not idea if they'd talk about Magnuseem AT ALL but at least let's say they'd talk about mary having a past she would not like to let out and how sherlock being shot was related to it.

fourth episode: discussions about the last months of mary being alive, how fast life had become and how they'd try to keep up with each other. (assuming it'd be safe to talk about her case) sherlocks guilt over mary taking a bullet for him, how john started resenting sherlock, their fall out, sherlock relapsing etc

I'm not sure if eurus would be brought up at all but it'd be nice to hear them talk about what it was like having to build their home from the ground (since everything exploded) and having to deal with the rawness that all these experiences back to back left them with.

most of all I want them to discuss "the lying detective" case (aka culverton smith) bc it's one my favorites eps from the show and I want them to TALK ABOUT IT

(note: I want to make it clear that they would be only unraveling it for the cameras bc of the documentary, since it would be implied that at some point they had a healthy and open conversation about all of these events previously)

some details: rosie is of course there too, as an eleven y/o and she also appears sometimes to talk about living with john and sherlock as guardians

the format might alternate between the documentary and actual "show scenes" if that makes sense (since some stuff might not be discussed in front of the cameras)

they'd be probably living out of bakerstreet by this point but would go back to shoot some scenes and show old stuff (picking this headcanon from a fic whereMrs Hudson left 221 baker street building for sherlock in her will)

sherlock being a brat about doing interviews but being very diligent when showing his bees

it'd be very heavily implied that they are together romantically now (e.g: sherlock talking about feeling distressed during wedding planning, john telling how dazzled he was when first meeting him etc)(plus them literally raising a daughter together lol)

(I'd like to show rosie and them interacting and rosie calling both of them dad or something similar). nothing explicit in camera tho. maybe in the "non-documentary" bits

[hopeled]

" No."

at first, that is the only thing that comes out of Ritsuka's mouth the second Saber finishes her explanation, a harsh sound to refuse the silence that would choke her if she had let it settle. " No." she repeats again with a ferocity so like the time she denied the Lion King's proclomations, the first time she had let herself feel the fire that always burned and scraped at the back of her throat. make no mistake: this is not anger. she had already sworn to herself before coming here that no matter what is said, she would not get angry at Saber for it. it is not her fault, the Servant is not to be blamed. ( no-one is to be blamed, but she was human, and emotions were always something Ritsuka felt within her very soul.)

she cannot deny the logical explanation given. it made sense, almost too much. Holmes had a role to play, as did that younger Moriarty. each Apostle had a mission assigned to them, given by the Alien God. but now it seems that even that was not the full truth. so Olga Marie....she was an Apostle too. one meant to act as the others overseer. just another part of Marisbury's plan. even his own daughter....-- any disgust that Ritsuka could display makes no appearance, mind too frantic. every Apostle, every one that ended up helping Chaldea, had all died in the end. a choice each made of their own volition, always parting with a smile, as if nothing was wrong.

she could handle the loss. she could take each parting and continue on. she had no choice in that regards. but.....the Count?

him, the final Apostle?

him, a....traitor.....?

no. no no no no no no. she can't believe it, she refuses to believe it, to even let that thought sit and fester inside of her mind. it was ridiculous. complete bullshit. does Saber know nothing of the Avenger? of his story? he, who knew the sting of betrayal, forced to pay for a crime inside a place that could only ever be likened to hell. it was not possible. the Count was not a traitor, not even if the situation was like Holmes, where he forced himself to forget. how many times had he helped her? under no obligation, no request of her own, how many times had he been by her side when it was neeed most? she wouldn't have survived Aphrodite's song without him. her soul would have long since been dragged down to the mud without him. ( when she died within the mists, he wouldn't have-- ) and he had said so himself at the end of those seven days. if he could be a guiding light for anyone else--

he would not do that to Chaldea.

he wouldn't do that to her.

" Why should I believe anything Goetia says? Why do you?!" neither of them have ever given her a reason not to, she knows. but this was different. to even insinuate that someone Ritsuka loved was merely lying to her, saying that everything that had happened was nothing more than some act to make sure she got this far.... Saber knows. she knows that her and the Count are not just Master and Servant. she knows that Ritsuka loves him and it is the same for him. and even if this is some act of preperation, that doesn't make it hurt any less.

" Why do you believe that? What evidence do you have to suspect that Edmond would even be our enemy after all he's done?!" there is no attempts to hide what she feels. the hurt, the pain, the disbelief. the heartache that echoes in watery eyes. as the slip of his true name leaves her lips. " You tell me what proof you have right now. You tell me how you can look me in the eyes and say that you suspect everything has just been a lie!"

"Yes. The three Reckonings for the Human Order to permit Novum Chaldea within its walls after the abuse of Extra Classes". The abundance of such classes had become a bemusing development, when Fuyuki had but one tethered as an exception to the seven main in Angra Mainyu — a threat far beyond the structure of a Grail War, its flames spilled when her holy blade obliterated the Holy Grail in which it lurked. And while they might be curious cases each, the world's allowance to their assistance in the first place if overuse might become a complication were the far more pressing concern.

"The Apostles summoned under the will of Chaldeas all manifested as Alter Egos, with exception of Sherlock Holmes — of their forces, there was not a single Servant belonging to the seven main classes which the Human Order relies upon. It may seem an irrelevant factor, with Rasputin the only operating agent. however, there is reason to believe that is not the case.

'Romani Archaman' had his suspicions, and they were not verified before we exchanged bodies.

The Apostles summoned were divided into two fronts — those to guide Chaldea, and those likewise assigned to the Crypters. At present, Chaldea has engaged five such entities, though now it is known Olga Marie was herself a Servant and possibly an Apostle herself, to act in accordance with Chaldeas. That world's forces all possessing the Saint Graph of Extra classes opposes the Human Order's reliance on the seven main, should there be an additional to reflect that matter, there remains still unmasked even should Olga Marie have served a similar purpose.

Goetia did not reach his conclusion, and Sherlock Holmes was vigilant never to speak of mere speculations, no matter when that would delay the deliverance of his hypotheses until, however..." The words of that day echoed as if spoken aloud — the right to be informed, not to be handled like fragile goods. "You should be made aware in the event theory becomes fact".

She had been procrastinating, wishing it were possible to follow the detective's lead without undermining the trust that their Master had generously extended, doing so in spite of one betrayal by omission. if it were possible to wave this all away, turn a blind eye and hope they were fleeting possibilities without evidence certain to be debunked, it would be so much kinder to the mage. But this was the knowledge she had been charged with, for better or worse — and the knight would need bear the brunt of retaliation so that Ritsuka may pick herself up and Goetia walk his path without intersecting hers.

"Sherlock Holmes — speculated in the Camelot Singularity report as intended a Caster Servant, assumed the role of Advisor within Novum Chaldea. James Moriarty — launched a campaign to assume control of Novum Chaldea in tandem with eliminating his adversary, the younger counterpart of an Archer Servant who bears no such memory. Ashiya Douman — reported as the Caster of Limbo responsible for an experiment in another world prior to the bleaching, a Servant who sought to claim the seat of a Beast for himself and manufactured his a Singularity intended to evolve into a Lostbelt. Senji Muramasa — a man initially encountered within Caster of Limbo's experiment, responsible for the advent of Olga Marie, registered in Chaldea's database as a Saber-class once summoned separately.

If Senji Muramasa were a guide, if his role in the British Lostbelt might have been his true part, that would grant each side a Ruler and Alter Ego".

Though she trusted Ritsuka understood the point, the Servant herself was aware this route must have long become tiresome, like the padding of a tale so a cliffhanger might keep a passionate reader waiting — but there was no such thrill and wait they could not. Not if she was to adhere to the mage's wishes.

"Ruler, Avenger, Alter Ego.

Gregori Rasputin appears an Alter Ego, though personal experience with his vessel, combined with the alteration of his fellow Apostles' classes, I believe it possible he may be unveiled as compatible with the final class. Which would leave Chaldea's.

It is known an Avenger has guided and safeguarded your mind for a considerable time; a Servant capable of masquerading his class. Ritsuka, I only say this to spare you a repeat of what you experienced with Ruler — but Goetia and I suspect Edmond Dantes is the final Apostle watching Chaldea.

[trixeraptops]

My second ever commentary post how fun

This time it's Enola Holmes 2

This is a live reaction so there is no context, suffer.

Warnings for swearing and all capsAnyways let's hop in the carriage and travel back to Victorian(?) England.

Ooh letter burning for the logo fun

Ok I doubt any of this is true don't lie to me bitch

Why is she running away from the police?What did she do

I will say she looks good

Yeah you should explain and I do remember you

Oh yay she opened a detective agency

Awww she kept Dash how cute

But didn't she give it Sherlock in the end of the last movie?

She forgot how sexist and ageist her time period is lmao

Hah they all just want Sherlock221B!!!!!

Trying not to draw attention, blows up a mailbox

Tewksbury is champion for change and progress I love it

Girl you have time for a little distraction you fucking tsundere

Chrysanthe-mum

Oh her agency is already shut down

2who is it

Aw a little girl she's so. Cute I love her scarf

Ooh the cinematic shot

Enola looks so out of place lol

I hope this is pro Bono I don't think this girl has much

Enola don't look so put off, not everyone is rich as you

Ew rat

We weren't sisters in the usual way, love that

It soesnt mean anything to the Lil one but to Mae it clearly does

Aw this is so sweet

The game is afoot Jesus your finding a missing person not hunting one

Changed her name to Hilda

They're looking for disease at the entrance omg

Bruv you're gonna get yourself and bessie in trouble bruv

That was smart tho

Ooh torn pages that's sus

She stole the pages?

Oh that woman has such a soft voice it's so pretty but I can't hear her

Mae definetely knows somethingMae was involves in the theft o.o

Haha 'young lady I'm afraid I'm married'

Damn she's in a bar and it's fucking rowdy in here

Mae is a showgirl isn't she?

She is

That was a fun jaunty number

The missing worked with Mae as a showgirl

Jesus Mae

Lol fake knife

False bottom! I knew she was a top lmao

It's a sappy romance poem

She ran away to marry someone didnt she?Ooh drama

Dun dunbdun mysterious blurred fellow in the background

Ew he's following her

He hid but he's very loud what is cane made of metal?

Sherlock! He's drunk

Lol roasted

His bullshit tips are everything

Now sh I'm thinking you should write that down

You shouldn't get so drunk ehen you have no way home write that down

Wait is she gonna live with her brother or is this is a John reveal?

Jesus christ he's really fucking observant even when drunk and hungover

I don't need tour help! But I'm still taking the food you offered

Don't speak with a mouthful

Tewksbury!!!

Ooh she sits where he walks to work so they can run jnto each other.

She looks so upset after making a joke

That was so awkward lmao

Feel a need?

It's a coded poem! Open mouth

She's so excited

You didn't have to say you don't sew bruv we get it your not like other girls

I doubt this case will get media coverage

The doors open o.o

Suspecious...But not as sus as her for breaking into someone's house

Oh this shows a struggle and abandonment

MAE she's dead!

This case just got alot more interesting

Inspector!

It'd mr.clangy

Sarah is wanted oof

Oh he tried to be respectful but superintendent is a bitch

I hate this guy I'm calling him mr.clangy forever now

Lestrade is so fucking calm, your boss just got punched in the gut

Hah he doesn't remember you bruv

Just a friendly visit cause your sis is running away from the cops

I cant I can't, maybe I can

He's such a fangirl omg

Damn she roof hopping

Shit she almost fell, she gone die

Wait what the fuck

Enola Holmes is turning all the men in England trans lol

I wonder if the cases are related

Wait Moriarty maybe?

I'm a slut for BBC Sherlock so forgive all the speculation that's purely based on BBC Sherlock, I know they aren't related

He has this walk

Grail

Immediate recognition lmao

AH VIOLIN

Enola looks weirded out

You tell Sherlock! She made it bout herself, she wants media attention not to help

Haha callback

He just walks past them lmao

I think Poppy might be a chick but I could be wrong

A hat! Dun dun dunnn

A TAPER CROWN HAT I KNEWBTHEY WERE RELATED

It's not a date it's a place!

Williams for reds not a Poppy at all

I'm going to a ball yay! Ew

Smh Enola

I love her cloak

Her dress is so pretty

Why is the music so sus when they light the cake

Lol the chaperone

She keeps forgetting what her society is like

Bitch you live here how do you forget this shit

He's actually leading Sherlock in a dance lmao

Oh she gone get caught

Tabitha Timothy lol

Fan language!!! Oh thats so clever and cute!

But she doesn't know fan language hahaha she immediately messed up

Omg Tewkesbury

Of course he's doing something with plants

This is so weird and cute i love their little relationship

Haha I love her

You're a man when I say soShe's such a bitch

She's a natural at dancing or maybe just with Tewksbury

What does that mean lmao

Don't touch the ginger cake!

Wait dance cards are an actual thing lmao

ID the writing ON SIGHT

TSUNDERE

jealous bitch

Cicely seems nice, she complimented Enola even if she had an outdated dress

Dislocated and I'll scream, ICON

He knows Bessie!

Ooh a secret meeting how funBunch of random letters returns

ITS MORIARTY OMG OMG

I LOVE THIS

I hope their as gay as the BBC

Oh my lord JUST SAY ITS ABOUT YOUR CASE

Not the police barging in

She gave him her evidence! How sweet

Cecily is the only one who looks concerned for her everyone else is making fun of her

Keep silent Enola!

Shut up mr.clangy no one likes you

Oh no he's gonna kill Bessie isn't he :(

His job is to kill match girls who are needling out the corruption?

Sexist

Oooh mr.clangy stopped Sherlock from getting her

Oof

POLICEMAN IS HIDING HIS HAND

Those fingerprints are blurry at best

Ohmygod I was typing the last line then Sherlock kicked a fucking sign and scared a cat

It's the jujitsu woman!

It's ok you can say it

Ew I don't like how that guard looked at Enola

Wtf whyd they push her into the center?They're gonna hang her? Or beat her? What?

IS IT HER MOM?!

No its jujitsu lady

AND HER MOM

Prison break bitches

Her mom really likes bombs huh

Carriage chase carriage chase

Theure giving people typhus or something

He's gonna jump on isn't heNot anymore lol

Mr.clangy you bitch stop shooting st them

You go girl

Holy shit he just broke their wheel

I hope the horses are all right

Probably are they disappeared with the crash

Fuck off you bitch

I LOVE THEM, I LOVE THEM OMG

HOLY TRINITY INDEED

DAMN HE GOING FOR THE KILL

THE CARRIAGE IS A BOMB

Genius

Aw they changed her into new clothes how nice

Her mother is initiating boy talk

He ain't my Boi

I love that's she's acknowledging her part in Enola self isolating

She's encouraging her to get allies ♡

I love these women

She just winked? Why?

Get a haircut as your parting word lmao

I knew it

They're killing the match girls by giving them typhus through the MATCHES

FUCK YES

And Sarah figured it out

She and Mae were expirementing eith it

Genius

They tested flies, mice, plants

Extraordinary I love them

She went to Tewkesbury!!!

His flat is filled with flowers and plants ♡♡♡♡

I love him

Yay their allies

Jealous bitch

IS CECILY SARAH?!

Shut up you awkward bruv

SHE IS

I FIGURED IT OUT MOTHERFUCKER

To be fair they spelled it out

TEWKESBURY YOUR NOT EVEN COURTING AND YIU DAID ILY

She sent Ily to William too

OHMYGOD I LOVE THIS

SHE HIT HIM

AAAHAHHHHHHH SHE RETUREND FEELINGS OMG OMG OMG

We live we laugh we love

Just tell em your a lord, I am, then they'll believe you omg

Sherlock!

The contempt in their voices I love this sibling dynamic

I knew they were connected I KNEW

Is that guy dead

He is

Mr.clangy

Moriarty is dead :(

Haha Tewkesbury

It's a set up!

Is Moriarty actually alive

He is

Ooh William thankyou for golding onto that

It's a letter isn't it

Nope map

Dora Dora Dora the explora

He can't fight lol

She's just beating him up until he pussies up and fights her

AH THEY KISSED

After she punched him multiple times lol

They're so cute

Secret treasure

SARAH!

She was wearing a wig this whole time damn

Uh oh they have to tell her he's dead

Aww poor Sarah ♡

Ew mr.clangy

BESSIE NO

YOU GO BESSIE BITE HIS ASS

SHERLOCK NO

Tewksbury is getting fucked up

Ooh but he's got a sword now

Fuck off clangy

Did Sherlock just kill someone?

How many bullets has he got? It's a small gun can't be too many

HAHA HE RAN OUT FUCK YOU CLANGY

ENOLA NO

Retractable knife for the win!

Ah shit she got knicked in the head real bad

Yes Tewkesbury fuck him up and get your girl

Shit clangy is dead Enola full ass killed him

Now that murder charge is valid

Sherlock you dramatic bitch

THE SOFT VOIXE WOMEN IS MORIARTY

WHAT A TWIST

I LOVE THIS

Go off queen! Tell him, dick him down verbally

Society creates yet another villain

For now at least, love thatOh no is the bad guy gonna win?

He paper burning is beautiful though

But the movie isn't over yet

Revolution!

Shut up boss man

Sometimes an inspiring speech doesn't work

At least not right away

Yiu go Bessie I love you girl

This is amazing I love this

I think this music was at the end of the other movie too

She runs her agency out of the fighting place now :)

Holmes and Holmes ♡♡♡♡

But I glad she refused

The running write that down gag ♡

They're gonna meet with jne another ♡

Ah they're so cute

MORIARTY ESCAPED O.O

I love them so much

Ohhhh the true part was Match Girl Strike that makes more sense

I thought I heard of match girls before

ENILA GOT HIM A FLATMAYE LMAO

IS THIS JOHN

IT IS OMG OMG OMG

I LOVE THIS SO MUCH

♡♡♡♡/5 I loved this movie

[7soulstars]

Hello ☁️ Can I request a Sherlock x deaf reader who is very shy and self concious? you're an amazing writer!

 Omg thank you for requesting darling! I had a lot of fun researching this but it was quite a challenge ! I wasn’t sure if you wanted a fic or an hc so I decided to do a hc ! I hope you like this !

Sherlock with a Deaf S/O

- Now it is not new to everyone that Sherlock doesn’t do feelings.

- BULLSHIT

- WHO THE FUCK EXPLAINS HOW HE SOLVES A MURDER VERBALLY AND THEN IN SUPER FAST SIGN LANGUAGE SO THAT YOU UNDERSTAND TOO ?

- He knew sign language, he had learnt it for a case years before meeting you.

- You kind of saved him from getting strangled by a murderer by knocking him out with a fire extinguisher the first time you two met at a library where he followed the murderous man.

- Why were you there ? Well it is a good place for an introvert to hang out. You were studying a bit of something related to your profession when that happened.

- John, Greg and his divsion had followed in a few mintues later .

- “Sherlock!” *looks at you who is staring down out the fainted body in absolute terror* “Thank you for helping him !”

- But you didn’t hear him, you chose not to wear your hearing aid that day either.

- “She’s deaf Gavin stop embarrasing yourself ! Really are you that stupid? ”

- You never thought you would see him after that but fate had it’s own gameplay.

- Next time you met him and John was when he scared off a creepy man following you.

- “Just a payback for last time”, he had signed looking at any direction but yours.

- You just stood their silently. You were too shy to talk so you decided you should take your leave from the undoubtedly handsome detective with a squeaky little goodbye.

- But he stopped you by saying that he needed help with a case related to your profession.

- He lied.

- He spent the entire night bothering Greg and Mycroft to find him a case involving you profession.

- Soon enough every single person who Sherlock was always around had to learn sign language even though you assured Sherlock you knew how to lip read.

- Sherlock speaks too fast so he always has to sign for you.

- You feel bad because you think it’s bothersome but your boyfriend doesn’t think so.

- “It’s quite entertaining keeps me alert and on my toes”

- Explains how he solved a case to you in rapid sign language because we all know that little shit will be all smug about it.

- Unspoken habit of not shooting while you’re at 221B because the vibrations startle you a lot.

- You are highly insecure and he read that out the moment he saw you but he doesn’t know the cause.

- So he asks. ( And has John by his side to whack some sense into him incase he blurts something rude)

- By the time you had finishing the duo had the biggest frowns on their faces

- The fact that you were rejected by regular schools for being disabled and were not accepted at a school for people like you for not fitting into the stereotype pissed Sherlock off.

- The fact that you underestimated yourself annoyed him even more.

- You are highly intelligent and Sherlock knew that very well, but your self conciousness always came in the way.

- He starts giving you little affirmations all the time.😭

- You often refuse to wear your hearing aids because they’re a bit uncomfortable but Sherlock insists you to wear them whenever he drags you out on a case.

- “Not everyonee is as smart as us darling”

- He doesn’t smoke anymore. Whenever he has a bad day he just gets home and stares at you.

- *stares* 

- ”Need a hug ?”

- *wordlessly falls into your lap as you skim through his curls*

- Once did the same when you had a REALLY bad day and when you were extremely insecure.

- “You do this for me all the time you look like you need one today...”

- You cried in his arms and he said nothing. Just held you tighter because that’s what you needed the most.🥺

- IRENE WHO ? He figured out you felt like she was better for him than you and the man blocked the woman’s number and told her to not contact him again in the most polite way possible

- You’re the only one who can handle his childish tantrums when even John can’t.

- “You are MY GIRLFRIEND don’t side them !”

- “YOU ALMOST POISIONED MYCROFT !”

- “It was an ExPeRiMeNt Y/N !”

- You being the only one who is allowed to stay in the room while he is in his mind palace.😤

- “Anderson get lost, Y/N where are you going? Stay here”

- MUMMY AND DADDY HOLMES ADORE YOU !

- “Sherlock really loves you darling I just know it !”

- ”MUMMY !”

-”You better marry her”

- He makes you feel like the most important person in the room in the most subtle ways.

- Even his rivals know that you are a line they willl never dare cross because nobody touches Sherlock Holmes’ girlfriend or they will pay in unimaginable terms.

- Even though he would never dare to tell you, William Sherlock Scott Holmes was awfully and dreadfully in love with the local shy and deaf girl and the entire world knows of this.

Part 2

*Stops typing and wallows in self embarrassment because I think it's not perfect enough for my perfect readers*

Sherlock: it may be shitty but you tried

Me*nodding*: I tried😔

Moriarty: well, all you can do is pray that they like it.....

Me:*cries*

But in all seriousness I FINALLY finished this piece after battling with my writer's block. I know this is not at all accurate and that brings me to an important point. I research a lot for this hc but I was disappointed that there was rarely any information on deafness and experiences of people with disabilities and problems faced by them. What does that mean?

WE NEED MORE REPRESENTATION OF PEOPLE OF DIFFERENT ABILITIES AND AWARENESS ABOUT IT ON MASS MEDIA AND THATS ON PERIODT. WE NEED TO EDUCATE PEOPLE AND THIS IS IMPORTANT.

Again I really really really tried my best and I really hope you all like it. In case of any mistakes I've made or if I have written anything offensive or triggering please tell me in the comments so that I can make immediate corrections. Please like and reblog my work if you like it to support me. Comments and constructive criticism is always appreciated. Please do not plagarize my work I really work hard on it! I have 4 fics to be completed but I promise to finish it soon. Thank you guys for being patient. 

~Love Hri! 😘

[jayoctodot]

The Silent Patient vs The Maidens

I will start by saying that I understand the appeal of these novels as page-turners. They are easy to read and if you want a twisty reveal at the end, you will probably be entertained and satisfied. That being said, I am SO CONFUSED by the near-universal adoration of The Silent Patient and the reasonably positive reception of The Maidens. The weaknesses of the two are strikingly similar, as well, which doesn’t give me much hope of seeing improvement from this guy, though I am intrigued to see whether he keeps repeating the same (apparently successful!!) patterns. These books were at least super fun to hate.

(For context, I read The Maidens for a bookclub I'm in, because several of the members had read and loved The Silent Patient, and one of them gave me a copy of the latter to read on my own time. I loathed The Maidens and then read The SP for comparative purposes. And because I'm a masochist, apparently.)

SPOILER WARNING! Do not read on unless you've finished both books (or unless you care not for spoilers). Sorry if it gets a bit shouty.

Here are the similar weaknesses I noticed in both:

PSEUDO-PSYCHOLOGY

-> Weirdly similar “group therapy” scenes early on where a cartoonishly unstable patient arrives late, disrupts the meeting by throwing something into the middle of the circle, and is asked to join the group after the therapist(s) speechify on the importance of boundaries (HA! None of these therapists would know an appropriate boundary if it kicked them in the ass) and debate whether to “allow” the patient to join. Both scenes are so transparent in their design to establish the credibility/legitimacy of the narrators as therapists, but instead both Theo and Mariana come off as super patronizing. The protagonists are less and less believable as therapists at the stories progress (though at least Theo’s incompetence is explained away by the “twist” at the end; Mariana, on the other hand, is confronted in the opening pages of the novel by a patient who has self-harmed PRETTY extensively, and rather than ensure he get proper medical attention, she essentially throws him a first aid kit and tosses him out the door so she can pour herself a glass of wine and call her niece... and it devolves from there).

-> Ongoing insistence throughout the narrative that one’s childhood trauma entirely explains the warped/dysfunctional way a character behaves or views the world, which is why the books go out of their way to give EVERY potentially violent character a traumatic childhood; when Theo insists that no one ever became an abuser who hadn’t been abused themselves, I wanted to throw the book across the room. (That is a MYTH, SIR. GET OUT OF HERE WITH YOUR ARMCHAIR PSYCHOLOGY.)

-> Female murderers whose pathology boils down to “history of depression” and “traumatized by a male loved one/family member.” Because, as we all know, depression + abuse = murderer!

-> The “therapy” depicted in both books is laughable and so so unrealistic, mostly because neither narrators function as therapists so much as incompetent detectives, obsessively pursuing a case they have no place pursuing (or skill to pursue - both just happen across every clue mostly by way of clunky conversation with all the people who can provide precisely the snippet of info to send them along to the next person, and the next… until all is revealed in a tired, cliched “twist”). Their constant Psych 101 asides were so tiresome and weirdly dated (also, the constant harping on countertransference got so ridiculous that at one point during "therapy" Theo literally attributes his headache and a particular emotion he feels to Alicia, as though the contents of her head are being broadcast directly into his mind... and I'm PRETTY SURE that's not how it works???)

CHARACTERS

-> Psychotherapist narrators with abusive fathers and pretensions of being Sherlock Holmes, which results in both characters crossing ALL KINDS of ethical lines as they invade the personal lives of everyone even tangentially connected to their cases (and, in Theo's case, violate all kinds of patient confidentiality. Yeah, yeah, by the end, that's the least of his offenses, but before you get there, it's baffling that NO ONE is calling him out on this).

-> All female characters are either elderly with hilariously bad advice, monstrous hulking brutes, or beautiful bitches (except for ~MARIANA~, who is Bella Swan-esque in her unawareness of her own attractiveness, despite multiple men trying to get with her almost immediately after meeting her. I'm so tired of beautiful female characters being oblivious to their own hotness. Are we meant to believe all mirrors and male attention have escaped their notice? If it’s to make them “relatable,” this tactic really fails with me).

-> All characters of color are shallow, cartoonish side characters, and most of them are depicted as unsympathetic minor antagonists (the Sikh Chief Inspector in The Maidens continuously drinks tea from an ever-present thermos, and his only other notable characteristic is his instant dislike of Mariana, whom he VERY RIGHTLY warns to stay out of the investigation that she is VERY MUCH compromising… the Caribbean manager of the Grove is universally disliked by her staff for enforcing stricter safety regulations at the bafflingly poorly run mental institution, because HOW DARE SHE. There's a very clear vibe that we're supposed to dislike these characters and share the protagonists' indignation, but honestly Sangha/Stephanie were completely in the right for trying to shut down their wildly inappropriate investigations).

-> "Working class" characters (or basically anyone excluded from the comfortably upper-crust, educated main cadre of characters) are few and far between in both stories, but when they show up, he depicts them as such caricatures. We got Elsie the pathologically lying housekeeper in the Maidens, who is enticed to share her bullshit with cake, and then a TOOTHLESS LEPRECHAUN DEALING DRUGS UNDER A BRIDGE in the SP. I kid you not, a man described as having the body of a child, the face of Father Time, and no front teeth, emerges from beneath a bridge and offers to sell Theo some "grass." I was dyinggg.

-> There are no characters to root for. Anywhere. Partly because they’re all so thinly drawn — and because we’re clearly supposed to view almost ALL of them as potential suspects, so they’re ALL weird, creepy, or incompetent in some way.

-> The flimsiest of flimsy motives, both for the narrators and the murderers. Theo fully would have gotten away with his involvement in the murder if he hadn't gone out of his way to work at the Grove and "treat" Alicia and his justification for doing so is pretty weak; his rapid descent into stalking and murder fantasy and his random ass decision to "expose" Alicia's husband as a cheater with a spur-of-the-moment home invasion and staged attempted homicide is ONLY justified if the reader hand waves it away as WELP, HE'S CRAZY, I GUESS (after all, he DID have an abusive father and a history of mental illness, and in Michaelides novels, that's ALL YOU NEED to become a violent psycho). I guess we're lucky Mariana didn't also start dropping bodies (because the logic of his fictional universe says she should definitely be a murderer by now... maybe that'll be his Maidens sequel?). But she especially had NO reason to randomly turn detective - and she kept trying to justify it by saying she needed to re-enter the world or that Sebastian would want her to (??), even though she had no background in criminal psychology... or even a particular fondness for mysteries (really, I would've accepted ANYTHING to explain her dogged obsession with the case. WHY were Sebastian and Zoe so certain she would insert herself into the investigation just because one of Zoe's friends was the first victim? WHY?). As for Zoe and Alicia, their motives are mere suggestions: they were both abused and manipulated, and voila! Slippery slope to murder.

WRITING STYLE

-> Incessant allusions to Greek tragedy and myth, apparently to provide a sophisticated gloss over the bare-bones writing style, which opts more for telling than showing and frequently indulges in hilariously bizarre analogies. Credit where credit is due — the references to Greek myth are less clunky in the SP, and I liked learning about the Alcestis play/myth, which I hadn’t heard of before - but OMG the entire characterization of Fosca, who we are meant to believe is a professor of Greek tragedy at one of the most respected universities on the planet, is just absurd. His "lecture" on the liminal in Greek tragedy is essentially the Wikipedia page on the Eleusinian Mysteries capped off with some Hallmark-card carpe diem crap. The lecture hall responds with raucous applause, clearly never having heard such vague genius bullshit before.

-> Super clunky and amateurish narrative device of interludes written by another character; Sebastian’s letter reads like a mashup of Dexter monologues and Clarice’s memory of the screaming sheep, but by FAR the worse offender is Alicia’s diary, where we’re supposed to believe she painstakingly recorded ENTIRE CONVERSATIONS, BEAT-BY-BEAT DIALOGUE, even when she’s just been DRUGGED TO THE GILLS with morphine and has mere moments of consciousness left… and even before that, she literally takes the time to write “He's trying the windows and doors! ...Someone’s inside! Someone’s inside the house! ETC ETC” when she thinks her stalker has broken in downstairs. WHO DOES THAT?)

-> Speaking of dialogue, the dialogue is so bad. Based on his bio, Michaelides got a degree in screenwriting, which makes his terrible dialogue even more baffling.

-> HILARIOUSLY rendered voyeur scenes where the narrators spy on couples having sex. Such unintentionally awkward descriptions. First we had Kathy’s climax sounds through the trees and then the bowler hat carefully placed on a tombstone before the gatekeeper plows a student. Again, I died.

PLOT/"TWIST"

-> The CONSTANT red herrings make for such an exhausting read. Michaelides drops anvils with almost every character that are so obviously meant to designate them as suspects in our minds. There is absolutely no subtlety in his misdirections.

-> The “crossover” scene between the SP and The Maidens makes no sense - when in the timeline does Mariana’s story overlap with Theo’s? They confer just before Theo starts working at the Grove, obviously (though Mariana appears to be the one who alerts Theo to the job opening there? Whereas in the SP, Theo has been obsessively tracking Alicia since the murder and had already planned to apply to work there?), but then are we supposed to believe that while Theo has been psychotically pursuing his warped quest to “help” Alicia, he’s also been diligently treating Zoe, so invested in her case that he repeatedly reaches out to Mariana to get her to visit Zoe and even writes Mariana a lengthy letter to convince her to do so??? And then a couple days after The Maidens ends, Theo is arrested???

-> But the thing I really did hate the most is how Michaelides treats his female murderers (who are both also victims themselves) as mere means to deploy a “twist”; there’s no moment spared to encourage our sympathy for Zoe, who was groomed and manipulated by the only trusted father figure in her life, and even after spending a decent amount of time getting to know Alicia via her ridiculous diary, where it’s so apparent that she’s been demeaned, objectified, manipulated, gaslit, and/or used by EVERY man in her life, she’s sent packing to spend the rest of her days in a coma… HOW much more satisfying would it have been for her to succeed in exposing Theo and reclaiming her voice? But no, she basically rolls over when he comes to finish her off (SPEAKING OF — ARE WE SUPPOSED TO BELIEVE THERE ARE NO SECURITY CAMERAS IN THIS INSTITUTE FOR THE CRIMINALLY INSANE????), writes one last diary entry, and drifts off forever. And then a couple pages of nothing later, the story is over. GOODNIGHT, ALICIA!

Both books kept me rolling throughout (by which I mean eye-rolling but also rotfl). Maybe I will check out his next effort — I’m morbidly curious what he’ll turn out. It does leave me wondering whether I should give up on thriller novels entirely, though. Are many of the weaknesses of these novels just characteristic of the genre? Maybe I'm just holding these books to unfair standards? I'm mostly only familiar with thriller films — many of which I think are amazing — but maybe you can get away with more in a film than you can in a novel.

...I really only intended to write a handful of bullet points, but more and more kept coming to mind as I wrote, to the point where subheadings became necessary. Whoopsie.

[pickledpascal]

There’s a She-Wolf in the Closet

Chapter Three: Halley’s Comet

Summary: Jayden is busy while Sherlock is not and has a tantrum while John has to scold him.

Word Count: 1.6k

Warnings: Mild blood, 18+ themes.

TASWITC Masterlist

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So far, after William's case, Sherlock didn't need Jayden's help which she was grateful for. Although she wasn't too phased by the gore, it's not something she wanted to see daily. Jayden expressed this and Sherlock respected that, deciding against taking her to more cases. Or have her consult for him. For now.

Though, that didn't mean he wouldn't talk about them. In great detail. Jayden sort of learned how to drown out the more bloody parts and focus on how Sherlock solved them. He was really smart and he loved to talk about it which Jayden didn’t mind much. She hated the men that thought they were smart but were actually incredibly stupid, Sherlock concured with that opinion. 

—---------

“Those men are annoying. But anyone can be a narcissist.” Was what Sherlock said, shrugging after he took a sip from his mug. 

Jayden smiled, “Like you?”

“Well…. Yes. But I have a more mild case.” Sherlock smirked, shaking his head a little as he looked at Jayden. 

Bullshit.

—--------------

Today was not so different for Sherlock and Jayden. Except it really was. The young woman had a shoot today and the detective had no case. It was a rare occurrence for one of them to be off while the other was busy. So imagine how distraught he was when he realized Jayden wasn’t going to be there for most of the day to keep him company. 

He acted like a child and Mrs. Hudson wasn’t a babysitter.

John was though. He did have a child. 

“So what happened?” John asked, going through his fridge as he tried to find the formula for baby Rosie while Mary rocked the little girl.

Mrs. Hudson rolled her eyes. “I don’t know, John!” She exclaimed over the phone, “He’s acting like his puppy died. And he’s pouting like a little boy.” As long as she’s been the landlady for both Sherlock and John, sometimes she felt like she didn’t know a thing about them with how much they change their demeanor. 

“If Sherlock gets worse, let me know and I’ll come over.” John let out a frustrated breath, giving the formula to Mary before he ran a hand down his face. Mary cocked her head at John. Wasn’t something always wrong with Sherlock? It certainly seemed like half of John’s problems came from him. 

Mrs. Hudson shrieked, hearing something breaking upstairs. She’d given the man tea this morning and left her china in the flat. Her china. “It’s worse!” She shouted before she moved the phone away from her face. “Sherlock Holmes, if that was my china, I’ll deal with you myself!” She yelled, though John could still hear her before she hung up.

The man let out a sigh and shook his head again. “Sherlock shattered Mrs. Hudson’s china.” He told Mary, grabbing his jacket. “I better save him before she murders him herself.” He joked a little.

“I’m surprised she hasn’t yet.” Mary laughed before she leaned in to kiss John softly, still rocking Rosie softly. “I have this, go.” She winked, grabbing the formula bottle.

—------------

As John entered 221b, he could hear arguing upstairs. The doctor shook his head, maybe he should have brought some supplies instead of going empty handed. Either way, John still went upstairs and, of course, the door was wide open to Mrs. Hudson yelling at Sherlock as she cleaned up the tray. He narrowed his eyes for a moment, confused before he registered the bleeding palm Sherlock was holding. The detective was wearing his maroon robe with his usual attire beneath it.

“Ah, John. Come here to help? Or to yell at me too?” Sherlock said, amused as he held his hand up which was gushing with blood even with the towel covering it. Of course he would still be able to find amusement in his own injury.

Mrs. Hudson huffed, “You’re lucky I’m not making you clean this mess.” She frowned as she picked up the pieces and left. This was her good china too…..

John, as always, was appalled. The doctor let out a sigh, going into the kitchen to grab some alcohol. “Come here, Sherlock.” He ordered, grabbing another clean cloth that was bound to be bloodied either way. 

Sherlock complied and let out a breath, sitting down at the kitchen table as he let John clean his hand. He set his eyes on a groove on the table, staring at it as John did his work. He knew the man was bound to ask something so maybe if he ignored it for long enough, it wouldn’t matter.

“You know Mrs. Hudson worries about you.” John stated, looking up at Sherlock as he took his time to clean the wound.

Sherlock hummed in response. “I would certainly hope so or that row was for nothing.” He chuckled deeply.

“Yes, so do you mind telling me why you had a temper tantrum like a five year old?” John asked pointedly, pouring a little too much alcohol on the cut, making Sherlock wince softly.

“Not important.” The detective simply said, looking away. Anywhere that wasn’t in the vicinity of John Watson. 

But his emotions got the better of him, like he always did, and a light blush spread on Sherlock’s face. Embarrassment. That wasn’t an emotion the detective was too familiar with. And where did it come from? Well….

John smirked for a moment, catching on. “This is about Jayden isn’t it? What, did she finally realize that you’re a cock?” He laughed quietly as he wrapped Sherlock’s hand in a bandage. This was golden for the doctor. As far as he’s known the man, John has never ever seen the man feel embarrassed.

“No.” Sherlock pursed his lips, taking his hand away from John once he noticed he was done. “She’s just…. Been gone today.” He said simply, trying his best to not sound so disappointed but he failed miserably. It only made John laugh even more, oh, he’d have to tell this to Mary once he got home. “What’s so funny?” He asked, eyebrows furrowing in confusion.

John shook his head as he let out another hearty laugh. “You’re an attention whore is what’s funny, Sherlock.” The man in question blinked, facing this revelation was…. Interesting to say the least.

—-------------

That night, around 12 am, Jayden came home. When she got to her floor, she gasped in surprise. Sherlock was standing at her door, a bandage around his left hand. At least it wasn’t his dominant one. She cocked an eyebrow him as she adjusted her glasses, “You waiting there for me like a fucking creep?” Jay asked jokingly as she unlocked her door and went into her apartment, Sherlock following her inside. She was sure Sherlock was able to pick it but…. She was kind of happy he waited.

“Thought it would be kinder than breaking and entering.” Sherlock shrugged, somewhat admiring the casualness of being in Jayden’s flat as he sat down on her sofa. The normalcy of it suddenly hit the detective like a train. 

“Mrs. Hudson texted me saying that you were being a bitch today.” Jayden hummed as she started to prepare some coffee for the two of them. The young woman wasn’t exaggerating when she said Sherlock (one) expected her to make him coffee and (two) he was starting to get addicted to it. The frothed sweet cream was her special ingredient and it was like crack.

Sherlock snorted out a laugh. “That’s not a nice thing to say.” But he knew he was acting in that way. All because of his new addiction. Not to coffee. And not to sweet cream either.

“Hm, if you don’t like it, you could leave.” Jayden said with a sly smile as she set a mug in front of Sherlock, taking a sip from her own before she set it down and took off the jacket she was wearing. It revealed a simple gray sweater but Jayden’s neck was exposed…. 

Usually, she would wear turtlenecks. Sherlock believed it was because she was self conscious but he was wrong. Wow. He’s rarely wrong! But what fixated Sherlock on Jay’s neck, besides it being a new patch of exposed skin he’s never seen before, was the tattoo going up her neck and almost meeting the hairline there. It was a similar patterning to the one he’s seen on the small glimpses of exposed skin he’s seen on her back and stomach. Perhaps it was all one big tattoo? Sherlock took a breath and willed his eyes away. That was not something he needed to think about in the moment or his mind would spiral.

For a moment, it was silent while the two of them were just sipping on their coffee. Then Sherlock spoke up, asking something he’s been wanting to ever since they ever met. “What do you want to do?”

Jayden looked at Sherlock, confused by the question. She thought he might have already figured it out. He was Sherlock Holmes after all. “After all this, I want to be an actress. An actual one. Though, I do think I got faking orgasms down to a T.” She joked, nudging the man once she noticed a blush appearing on his face. 

“I don’t want to lie and say you’d make a good actress simply because I’ve never seen you act before.” Sherlock said truthfully, though he was faithful that she was. 

Jayden laughed quietly, “At least you’re honest with me, Sher. Some people are just plain liars.” She hummed as she took a sip of her coffee then her eyes shifted back to Sherlock, assessing the honesty in his features. “I like you.” She said simply, looking down at her coffee.

Sherlock blinked, processing this information. What did that mean? As a friend? Sherlock could handle that. Romantically? He’d be much worse than he was earlier today. And maybe he was okay with that.

[robinrunsfiction]

It’s A Love Story - Part 3

Part 2

"What the hell Frank," (YN) heard Ray shout from where she was sitting on the steps in front of the school, digging through her backpack. Her head snapped up as she looked between them, trying to figure out what was happening.

"What did I do?" He asked defensively.

"Tucker just told me he delivered a pizza to you on Friday night, and he saw girls shoes and a purse by the door. You lied about being sick to go on a date?!"

(YN)'s eyes wide as panic ran through her. She hadn't seen Tucker, she was in the living room, so there couldn't have been any way he would have seen her. Ray would have said if he knew it was her, right? Tucker would have surely told her brothers.

"You got a girlfriend?!" Mikey asked, clearly surprised.

"Umm, yea, I do," Frank answered, rubbing the back of his neck nervously.

"Why didn't you tell us?" Gerard asked.

"Who is she?" Ray asked, not even giving him time to answer the last question.

"She doesn't go here," Frank lied.

"Is she cute?" (YN) finally piped up, a wicked smile on her face.

"She's gorgeous," Frank replied emphatically and (YN) grinned even wider.

"Are we gonna meet her sometime?" Gerard asked.

"I dunno, maybe, if she wants."

"What's her name?" Mikey asked.

Frank opened his mouth to answer and (YN) was genuinely curious to see how he was going to respond when the bell rang, signaling that they had five minutes to get to their homerooms.

"I'll tell ya later," Frank replied as they all made their way into the school.

(YN) hung back and Frank slowed down so he could walk with her. "Saved by the bell," she smirked.

"Who knew Tucker was fuckin Sherlock Holmes," he muttered and (YN) laughed.

“What name were you gonna give them?”

“Yours,” he smirked.

“Stop it,” she said, smacking his arm and he laughed.

“I’ll see ya in algebra,” he said before heading down the hall. (YN) watched him go and sighed. One day they’d all know she was the girl at Frank’s house. One day she’d be able to kiss him before they parted ways. One day couldn’t come soon enough.

~

A few weeks passed, and (YN) was still living for the thrill of being with Frank. There were small moments like (YN) coming out to the garage to watch the band, or rather Frank, practice, to them spending more time doing homework together, to Frank taking her hand as they sat next to each other during the weekly movie night, even though her brothers were right there. Then there were the more exciting moments, like when she found Frank between the shelves, deep in the library.

“Hey,” she whispered, making him jump.

“Shit, oh hey (YN)," he grinned. "What are you doing here?”

“I'm in study hall, but I came to get some books for my research project for history. I saw Mikey up front and he said your English class was in here so," she shrugged, leaning against the shelf.

"You thought you'd come find me in the stacks?" He smirked.

"I thought I'd come find my books for my research project. Come on Frank, what did you think was gonna happen?" She replied with a smirk of her own.

Frank glanced over his shoulder, before grabbing her waist and kissing her hard. (YN)'s mind began to spin, partially because of how amazing the kiss was, but also because her brother was also in the library. Hell, anyone could wander over and find them making out. It'd take all of a minute for the entire school to find out. And (YN) loved it.

She ran her hands through his hair, as they made out against the historical fiction books until they heard footsteps and they pulled apart and both turned their attention to the books. Whoever it was, kept walking, not even slowing down to do more than glance their way.

“Close one,” Frank whispered.

“Mmhmm,” she agreed, stealing a look out of the corner of her eye.

“Kinda awesome.”

“Oh yea,” she giggled.

That afternoon at lunch, (YN) was at her usual spot with the guys, minus Mikey. Ray and Gerard had been practically bouncing out of their seats, clearly having news to share.

“Where is Mikey?” Ray asked, looking around anxiously.

“I dunno, but I’ll fill him in later,” Gerard said. “Let’s just tell ‘em!”

“There’s a battle of the bands coming up and we’re signed up!” Ray announced.

Frank, Bob, and (YN) all exchanged a look of surprise.

“Wait, when is it?” Frank asked.

“Next month!” Gerard grinned.

Bob put his head in his hands. “We have so much more practicing to do.”

“I think we got a real shot!” Ray explained. “And when we win, we get prize money and  real studio time to record an album!”

“We’ll be taking off in no time!” Gerard nodded.

“Can I help?” (YN) asked. 

Before anyone could answer, Mikey walked into the cafeteria with a cute blonde girl. 

"See ya there Mikey," the blonde waved before going off to join her friends and Mikey had a smug smile on his face.

"About time!" Ray said.

“What was all that about?” Gerard asked.

"Me and Kristin are going to the fall formal together."

“Oh nice,” Gerard replied.

(YN) almost choked on her sandwich. "Wait, what?! That's not fair! I wanted to go to fall formal!"

"Who's stopping you?" Mikey replied.

"You and Gee! When you two, the least intimidating nerds at this school, somehow convinced the entire male population to stay away from me!"

She could feel people were starting to look at her as her voice raised with every word but she didn't care. She was angry and sick of how she'd been treated.

"Just go with Christine and Marie," she heard Gerard say, and she began to see red.

"I don’t want to because they have dates and I don't want to be a third wheel!" She snapped. "The double standards in this family are such BULLSHIT!"

"Miss Way!" Mrs. Simon barked. “The office, now!”

(YN) felt her cheeks burning red and her shoulders slumped in defeat as almost everyone in the cafeteria started laughing at her while she was marched down to the office by the teacher. She sighed in frustration at yet another way her brothers were ruining everything for her.

~

A few hours later the school day was over and (YN) reported to detention.

"Is this your first time in detention?" The teacher, Mr. Rodriguez, asked as she slid into the desk and she nodded. "Ok. The rules are there is no talking, you may do your homework, read, or sit silently."

(YN) wondered who she would even talk to since the room was empty. She pulled a folder out of her backpack and was about to get started on her homework when someone else walked into the room.

"Mr. Iero, please take a seat, you know the rules," she heard the teacher say. She looked up to see Frank coming to sit down at the desk next to hers.

"Hey," he whispered.

She grinned and then turned her attention back to her homework. They both worked silently until the teacher announced he would be right back.

"He's gonna be gone at least 10 minutes," Frank said once the door was closed.

"How do you know?"

"He's taking a smoke break."

"Oh, right. Well what are you doing here?"

"I couldn't let my girl go through her first detention alone," he smiled.

(YN) covered her face, partially because she was blushing, and partially because she was embarrassed to be in detention in the first place. "What did you do to be here anyway?"

"I threw a ball at Mikey's head during gym."

(YN) could hardly stifle her laughter. "Oh my god, were you playing dodgeball?"

"No, soccer."

(YN) burst out laughing, thankful Mr. Rodriguez was not in the room. "Thanks for that."

"He deserved it," Frank nodded.

"I agree,” she grinned.

When they walked out of the school almost an hour later, (YN)'s mom was sitting in her car waiting to pick her up. "Ugh, I can't wait to get grounded."

"Maybe it won't be that bad?" Frank said sympathetically as they walked down the steps.

"Hello Frankie, did you wait for (YN)?" Her mom called out the open car window.

"No, I had detention too," he shrugged.

"Oh," her mom seemed taken aback. "Well would you like a ride home?"

"Please," (YN) whispered, hoping to delay the trouble she was certain to get into.

"Sure, thanks!" He nodded, getting in the backseat.

"That Mrs. Simon said this wasn't your first outburst this year, (YN)," her mom said as they started to head home.

"Yea, I know."

"That's not like you," her mom replied, more concerned than angry.

"I know," she muttered, head against the window.

"No one asked me, but I think Gerard and Mikey should back off," Frank piped up from the backseat.

"What do you mean Frankie?"

"Don't worry about it," (YN) mumbled.

"They're too protective of her. I know she's a girl, and the youngest, even if it's just by a few minutes, but they don't need to treat her like every single guy is a predator," he explained.

"Did something happen?" Her mom asked, now very concerned.

"No, some guy in Gee’s class was talking to me at that pool party this summer and Gee freaked out. It doesn't matter, the social damage is done. I don't even care anymore."

"Do you want me to talk to them?"

"No, I don't wanna make it worse. Just let me handle it," (YN) answered.

The rest of the drive was silent until they arrived at Frank's house. "See you tomorrow," he said, reaching forward to rub (YN)'s arm sympathetically before getting out.

"He's a good boy," her mom said as they started back toward their house and (YN) hummed in quiet agreement. "And that necklace he bought you for your birthday is lovely."

(YN) didn't even realize she was playing with it until her mom drew her attention to it. "Yea," she agreed.

"If you ask me, I think he likes you, I've always thought that."

(YN) blushed. "Don't tell anyone, but I know he does."

"Because you like him too?" Her mom asked. (YN) nodded as they pulled into the driveway. "I'll keep it our little secret."

"So am I in trouble for getting detention?"

Her mom laughed lightly. "No, but don't let it happen again. If you want to yell at your brothers, wait until you're home."

"Will do," she nodded, a relieved smile crossing her face.

(YN) didn’t say anything to either of her brothers that night at dinner, eating quickly before running back up to her room. It still wasn’t fair that she got in trouble, or that Mikey could date whoever he wanted to and she couldn’t. She curled up in bed with her sketch book, and tried to let her frustrations come out through her pencil.

"Hey," she heard Mikey say from her doorway after a while.

"Go away," she muttered, not even looking up until something landed at the foot of the bed. It was her favorite candy bar.

"Sorry for being an ass," he said.

"Whatever," she said, grabbing the candy, but still not even looking his way.

"Did you hear what Frank did?"

"Gave you what you deserve," she replied.

"I guess you could say that, but we’re just looking out for you."

She glared at him. "I'm not that fragile Mikey! I can handle myself, now go away!"

“Sorry,” he muttered as he retreated back to his room next door.

(YN) got up and slammed her door and settled back onto her bed when there was another knock. 

“Oh my god, leave me alone!” (YN) shouted, but the door opened anyway.

“Can we talk?” Gerard asked, peaking in.

“No! Go away!” She said getting up to push the door shut, but Gerard was stronger than her.

“I’m sorry! I was thinking about how you said you wanna help with the band, and I was wondering if you’d design our logo for us, and maybe like some shirts or something?”

(YN) stopped pushing on the door. “Wait, really?”

“Yea, like when we win this thing, we’re gonna need some merch to sell to help get our name out there, and posters for gigs, stuff like that,” Gerard shrugged.

“Yea, I guess I could try,” she nodded.

“And I know Mikey tried to apologize, but didn’t do a good job of it. We just didn’t want a guy like Adam to get a chance to do anything, because then people would start talking and-”

“Hang on,” (YN) cut him off. “This isn’t the Regency era, I don’t need my older brothers telling me who I can and cannot spend time with, out of fear that I’ll disgrace the family!”

“That’s not it! I just… I just feel like it’s my duty to protect you. You and Mikey both, but it’s different with you because you’re a girl and I’ve seen the way the guys look at you and I can imagine what they’re thinking and it’s gross and it makes me mad.”

(YN) sighed. "I just wish that if you felt like making a decision in my best interest, you’d actually ask me what I want first."

"Sorry," Gerard mumbled.

"Doesn't do much good now, but whatever," she shrugged.

Gerard stepped back from the door, and she shut it behind him. It didn't really matter, she had Frank, but it was the principle of the matter that still left her steaming.

Part 4

[all-the-love-harold]

Fine Line

Chapter 1 - Lovin’ you’s the antidote 

The First installment of my new series, let me know what you think about Harry and Clara

December 16th 2019

Clara was sitting on her window sill staring out at the rain falling down onto the street below her. People were battling with their umbrellas against the wind and she felt a sudden feeling of warmth as she stared into her living room, her best friend's new album playing through her TV and grateful that she wasn’t outside and that she didn’t have to leave her flat now until tomorrow morning she turned it up. The sound of Harry’s voice singing “Just let me adore you” echoed around the room and in that moment, she couldn’t help but feel lonely. Harry was still in LA after the release of his album and the rest of her friends were back in their hometowns for Christmas already. Normally she would call her boyfriend, but less than 2 hours after Harry boarded his plane to LA, Will called her and said that he wasn’t in love with her anymore and it was probably best that they stopped seeing each other. And just like that 8 years was over in one phone call and her shoulder to cry on was on a plane halfway over the atlantic.

Clara had met Will on her first day of university and they’d been together ever since but apparently his work had become too important and he didn’t have time for her anymore. She knew this was a load of bullshit, she knew that he’d been spending a lot of time with his assistant, who was very skinny and very blonde and everything that Clara hated about the world.

“You’re better off without him” Harry had said to her over the phone when he finally had the chance to call her back

“Doesn’t feel like it right now” she replied

“I know,” Harry sighed “I wish I could hug you”

“Me too” she said, Harry’s hugs always made everything better, they had ever since they were little and the worst thing that happened to them was falling off their bikes onto the concrete.

Clara sighed deeply as she sunk down into her spot on the bay window. She hated that she couldn’t enjoy having one night to herself, but she had gotten so used to having people around her, people she had to look after or take care of in some way.

“Maybe I should get a dog,” she thought to herself. Then she would never really be alone and she’d always feel needed.

But she lived in a small apartment so she would need a dog that was ok with being left inside while she was at work. Or maybe even a dog that she could take to work with her. Or a dog that Harry could dog sit for her when he was home. She pulled her phone out of her pocket and googled her local shelter. This was the most excited she had felt for months and the advice her mum gave her when she was young kept replaying in her head

“A dog or a baby will never be a mistake, they might make things harder sometimes, but you’ll love them so much that you’ll never feel like you made the wrong decision” and love was exactly what Clara needed right now. Because after Christmas Harry would be leaving for an almost year long world tour and she couldn’t stand the thought of being alone in London for that long. And her job meant that she couldn’t move back home to Holmes Chapel.

With just nine days left until christmas the shelter was full of dogs that needed new homes, dogs of all shapes and sizes, some who had been there for months and some who had only spent a few days there so far. If she had a bigger space, she'd adopt them all, but for now, one would do. She scrolled through and looked at all the profiles on the website before deciding that she would need to meet the dog before making any kind of concrete decision. And that was that, tomorrow morning she would pick Harry up from the airport and take him straight to the shelter to help her choose her new baby.

***

“Good Morning Ra” Harry said, shoving his bags into the boot of her car. The advantage of having a best friend that lived in London was not having to feel like an ass who needed a chauffeur to drive him around his home city.

“Good Morning Harold” she smiled trying to contain her excitement. Sleeping on the idea of getting a dog had not changed her mind, if anything it had only made her more sure of herself. And maybe slightly nervous.

“You’re very cheerful for someone who’s just been dumped” he said as he sat down in the passenger's seat and buckled his seatbelt.

“Do you have anywhere you need to be today?” she asked, ignoring his attempt at mentioning the elephant in the room

“I have rehearsals tonight, but until 7 I am free, don’t you have to be at work?”

“I have the day off”

Harry frowned “You never take days off” he said suspiciously “What’s going on?”

“We’re going on an adventure” she handed him her phone, “You’re in charge of the music”

“Da da da da da da ddada” The opening line of Golden echoed through the speaker, and Clara drove off,away from the airport, rolling her eyes at Harry for playing his own album.

They drove mostly in silence, Harry didn't want to ask where they were going and after the way she ignored his comment about the break up he didn’t want to bring it up in case it made her sad when right in this moment she seemed happier and more excited than he’d seen her in months.

They pulled up in a dingy looking car park on the outskirts of London and Harry furrowed his brow

“Where are we?” he said, half tempted to lock his car door

“I’m getting a dog” she smiled widely

“A dog?”

“Yeah, you know four legs, barks, like to go on walks, looks really cute when it’s asleep”

Harry laughed “I know what a dog is” he said, “But you’re not home enough for a dog”

“Office dog” she smirked “and I didn’t think you’d have any objections to dog sitting when you’re around”

“I mean, I don’t” he half smiled “but are you sure”

“Harold, in the very wise words of my beautiful mother, a dog or a baby is never a bad thing. And since the other half of my baby decided to up and fuck off a week ago, I’m getting a dog”

Harry sighed and unclipped his seatbelt, “You know most people find a rebound after a breakup, but a dog suits you better.” Harry knew when to stop arguing, he’d known Clara his whole life and, in a way, he knew she was right, a dog really was exactly what she needed.

They walked into the shelter side by side and anyone walking past would guess that they were a happy couple, looking to add the first addition to their little family. But that wasn’t the case, Harry and Clara had never been and will never be more than friends, despite what their mothers might think.

“Hi” Clara said as they walked into reception “I’m looking to adopt a dog”

“Of course” the girl smiled eyeing Harry off “just follow the hall all the way down to the end and one of the girls will help you once you’re down there.”

“Thanks” Harry smiled, winking at her as they walked away.

“Do you you have to flirt with everyone?” Clara said to him once they were out of earshot

“Just helping you get a really cute one”

Clara rolled her eyes and ignored him, she found that sometimes if she indulged him too much he became even more annoying.

They walked through the door at the end of the hallway and Clara’s heart immediately split into two. The dogs were all in tiny cages and a few of them looked unwell and malnourished, and that sympathetic feeling she felt when scrolling through their profiles last night only increased tenfold, staring into their lonely little eyes.

“Hi, my name’s sarah” a girl came around the corner, a wide grin on her face “are you just having a look or are you here to adopt today?”

“I’d like to adopt” Clara said definitively

“Yay!” Sarah said, “These dogs here have only just arrived and they’re not quite ready for adoption yet, but if you really fall in love with one of them you can come back in a few weeks and pick them up once they’ve had their needles and health checks or, if you go a little further down, those guys are ready to go - do you have a yard for a big dog, or were you looking for an apartment dog”

“I have a flat” Clara said, “but he has a yard just around the corner from my flat where I would take the dog to run around”

“I think I have the perfect boy for you!” Sarah exclaimed and started down the hallway, stopping outside a cage.

Clara smiled up at Harry and followed, almost at a run she was so excited.

“This is Larry, he’s a 10 month old greyhound and he’s been living in this shelter for 7 of those months”

Clara turned to face the dog and instantly fell in love, she crouched down and let him sniff her hand and instead he gave it a big lick and snuggled into it.

“He’s a sweet boy” Sarah said “but he’s not without his issues, he’s been seen by our behaviour therapist and he’ll need ongoing training and support but a little bit of love will go a long way with this little guy”

“What did he need to see the behavior therapist for?” Harry asked, knowing that Clara wouldn’t.

“He’s displayed a few guarding behaviors, they’re not uncommon for his breed, with the right training, he’ll grow into a wonderful dog”

Clara had stopped listening, she was kneeling down now, with her hand outstretched so that Larry could sniff it. But he didn’t want to just sniff, he greeted Clara with a great big lick and she knew right then that this was the dog that she would be taking home today.

“I’m sold” she said, without taking her eyes off the dog, who was now sitting very elegantly, staring up at her.

“Really?” Sarah said “Great, I’ll go and get him and take him to the play area and you guys can get to know each other while I get all the paperwork sorted - any questions?”

“Just one” Clara said thinking of the only obvious issue with adopting a dog named Larry and being publicly linked to Harry “Can I change his name?”

“Of course” Sarah smiled “He’s still a pup so he’ll learn his new name very quickly”

“Perfect”

Harry smiled at Clara as Sarah walked away “Are you sure Ra?”

“I’m sure as hell H, I’ve never been more sure of anything in my life”

“Alright then” he smiled “guess I’m becoming an uncle today”

***

“How about David Bowie” Harry said later that afternoon, sitting on Clara’s living room floor, throwing Larry the tiny tennis ball that he’d gone out and bought after they got him home.

“Bowie for short” Clara mused “I really like that”

“David when he’s in trouble” Harry laughed

“Bowie” Clara called and Larry’s ears pricked up

“Bowie” she said again, and he bounded over to her.

“Well that’s settled then” Harry said.

Bowie sat down on Clara's lap while she petted his head gently.

"I'm so in love with you already little dog"

Harry spent the rest of the afternoon watching as Clara turned into the dog mum she was always meant to be and he felt his heart swell every time she smiled at something Bowie did.

"Loving you's the antidote" he thought to himself although in that moment he wasn’t entirely sure who was helping who.

***

December 19th, 2019 - London’s Electric Ballroom.

Late was one thing that Clara hated being. If she was ever late for something it usually filled her with so much anxiety that she would have to call someone and let them know that she was in fact on her way. But tonight she was running late because she couldn’t tear herself away from a snuggle on the couch with her beautiful boy and she hadn’t called anyone because couldn’t bring herself to tell anyone that she was late to her best friend's album release because she was too busy snuggling her dog and that she wasn't sorry at all. So instead she snuck in the back door, slipped into the dressing room and pretended she had been there the whole time.

“Gem!” she exclaimed when she spotted Harry’s sister “I’ve been looking for you everywhere.

“No you haven’t” she smirked “You just snuck in that back door, you were late”

“Shhh” clara hushed “Don’t tell H”

“He won’t care, not today, anyway - Have you met the latest piece of arm candy?”

Clara batted her eyelashes at the news that Harry was dating someone new

“No” she shook her head, “I didn’t know there was anyone new”

“Oh they only met a few days ago, just before he left for LA I think, but she’s pretty clingy and so far she doesn’t seem that nice”

“Blonde?” Clara asked, a tone of bitterness evident in her voice

Gemma nodded

“Skinny?”

“You bet” Gemma sighed

“Checks out” Clara nodded, “That’s why he hasn’t told me, I think he’s afraid I’ll get sad if he’s dating someone that looks like the girl Will slept with 2 days after he broke up with me”

“What a prick” Gemma said “Will, I mean, not H… maybe H a little bit” she added

“Is she here?” Clara asked, raising her eyebrows as if she was on a mission.

“Yeah” Gemma nodded towards the closed door to Harry’s private dressing room “They’re in there together, doors locked”

“Gross” Clara rolled her eyes.

All of Clara’s gulit about being late seemed to disappear after that, Harry would never know, or care if he was too busy having sex with a girl he’s only just met in the dressing room just before the show. Especially if hadn’t deemed her important enough to tell Clara about.

Go time was fast approaching and eventually Jeff and Tommy, Harry’s managers, started ushering all the guests into the concert hall, so that Harry could get ready and warm up. Clara had never been to this venue before, but as herself and Gemma stepped out onto the balcony, she understood why it was called the electric ballroom, the room was buzzing with excitement and she felt herself become excited too. She did always love watching Harry perform. She had ever since they were babies and Harry would dance in the kitchen play area at daycare and she would giggle along.

“Just there” Gemma whispered to her, pointing at the tall blonde that just walked into the room.

Clara shrugged and handed Gemma the glass of wine that she herself had just been handed “Well if H won’t introduce me, I’ll just introduce myself”

She walked over to where the girl stood, looking lonely and out of place and held her hand out to her quickly withdrawing it, thinking about where it might have been not too long ago.

“Hi, I’m Clara” she said, keeping her hands firmly by her side, “I’m Harry’s best friend, Gemma told me that you guys are dating”

The girl looked her up and down “I’m Shelly” she said, sounding bored with the conversation already “If you’re his best friend you’ve probably been to one of these things before right”

“Yeahhh” Clara nodded, not sure where she was going with this “Once, this only his second album”

“How long do they go for? I’ve got a somewhere to be later”

“He’ll be on stage for about an hour and half” Clara said taken aback by the lack of support she was showing “but it’s a release show, so he’ll want to hang around celebrate the album going to number one already”

Shelly scoffed “Oh well I Probably can’t stay for that, I might even have to leave before he gets off stage”

Before Clara had a chance to reply the house lights turned off and a voice began to echo around the room.

“Right” Clara nodded, not wanting to say too much, although it was becoming pretty clear to her that they both seemed to only be in this for sex “Well it was nice to meet you, I’m going to go watch from over there”

“She’s a delight, isn’t she?” Gemma said, handing Clara back her glass of wine, glad that the screams were echoing around the room loud enough to drown her words out from any eavesdroppers.

“I give it a month”

Gemma didn’t have a chance to retort, because Harry had made his way onto the stage and the screams filling the room became deafening, but she thought a month was ambitious.

“Golden, golden, golden, As I open my eyes' ' A smile as wide as Harry’s cheeks spread across his face as he looked out into the crowd and he winked at Clara when he found her standing next to Gemma on the balcony.She always loved that his first instinct was to find her in a room full of people. She smiled back at him and tears filled her eyes. She was so proud of the man standing up on that stage, he’d come so far since the last time they were standing in a room like this and she’d been there every step of the way.The smile on his face said it all, he was happy and he was proud of the album he’d written and so was she.

“I’m Harry, nice to meet you, thank you very much for having me, how are you? Harry said after playing Golden “The crowd cheered and Harry moved his gaze back to where Clara and Gemma were standing, tears streaming down both of their faces “Good! Before we start the show properly, I’d like to point out that my beautiful sister and my beautiful best friend are already crying, after they promised they would wait until I sang Falling”

The crowd laughed and Clara only cried more while Gemma tried to hide her tears from everyone who had now turned around to look at them.

“So my new album came out a week ago, and tonight I’m going to play it for you. London is home. You are my home, it only felt right to sing it in front of you before it goes on tour. So welcome, and sing along when you can”

As Harry began to sing Watermelon Sugar, Clara glanced over at the space where Shelly had been standing and noticed that she was gone. Clara shrugged and turned back to face the stage. All she wanted to do now was dance, and enjoy the art her best friend had devoted himself to for the last year and a half.

When the first notes of “Falling” echoed around the room Clara’s heart sank and she was taken back to the day he’d written the song. It wasn’t that long ago, 4 months maybe, and he was heartbroken, a complete mess, he had been so in love and camille had ripped his heart right out of his chest and walked away with it. He didn’t know what to do with himself, so he found comfort in Clara’s apartment, pretending that none of it ever happened. And that’s exactly how Clara felt now, Will was gone, she was alone, and she felt like maybe that was it for her, she’d had her one great love and now she was someone no one would want around. Life had it’s funny ways of letting you know that you’re on the right path, and for Clara, listening to Harry on stage, reclaiming his heart for himself in a room full of people who loved and supported him through his worst moments, was one of them, if he could do it, so could she. Each song after that filled her heart with more and more pride and by the time Harry came off stage she felt as though she was going to explode.

“Harry fucking Styles” she said running into his arms when she finally got backstage

“Clara fucking Riley” he wrapped his arms around her

“I want to stay and party but I have to get home to my Bowie”

Harry kissed on the forehead “If I could I’d skip the party to hang out with Bowie too.”

“He’s pretty much the best”

“I’ll stumble in at some point later on though” he smiled “So we can head back home for christmas early tomorrow”

“Good idea, alright, Love you H - and we have to talk about Shelly in the car!”

“No we don’t” he smirked

[gosherlocked]

Unaware of the beautiful

This is beautiful. I love this!  (TGG)

Er, beauty is a construct based entirely on childhood impressions, influences and role models. (TSOT)

SHERLOCK (in reference to the music): Beautiful. GUARD: Kills you in the end. SHERLOCK: Aye. Still beautiful, though. (TFP)

EURUS: What do you think? SHERLOCK: Beautiful. EURUS: You’re not looking at it. SHERLOCK: I meant your playing. (TFP)

(All quotes courtesy Ariane DeVere)

So we have this impressive sentence in the best man speech:

I am dismissive of the virtuous, unaware of the beautiful and uncomprehending in the face of the happy. 

But if you looks closely, at least the middle part is complete bullshit. From series 1 on Sherlock has definitely known what he thinks is beautiful and has expressed it clearly. He is not unaware of the beautiful, never was. Of course his concept of beauty may vary between traditional (the stars, music) and unconventional (admiration for a clever case of art fraud) but he knows quite well what is beautiful. 

The famous TSOT quote has traditionally been applied to male beauty as a construct based on the image of Sherlock’s own father that is reflected in Victor and later in John. So may we infer from this that someone in his life told him about astronomical and musical beauty as well? Probably. 

And this made me think. If one part of the sentence is wrong, what about the others? 

Now virtue may seem an old-fashioned concept so maybe we should replace it with morals or ethics. Sherlock clearly knows right from wrong and good from evil and usually applies his considerable skills to support the former and fight the latter. When did he ever dismiss moral or ethical people or behaviour? Even when he dismisses the concept of caring, one second later he states that he wants to help people:

SHERLOCK: Will caring about them help save them? JOHN: Nope. SHERLOCK: Then I’ll continue not to make that mistake.

I never understood how anyone could see Sherlock as amoral or cold. He saves people. And if something keeps him from doing so, he chooses not to adhere to that behaviour. 

In short, Sherlock is not dismissive of the virtuous as long as you define those as people acting in a moral and ethical way and not as some hypocrites who just take on the semblance of virtue. 

Now for the last one - uncomprehending in the face of the happy.  

This is not something Sherlock talks about often but you cannot doubt that he wants to ensure John’s happiness (whatever that may be). And there are his words to Molly:

I hope you’ll be very happy, Molly Hooper. You deserve it.

It does not matter that neither Mary nor Tom succeed in making people happy, what matters is that Sherlock thinks they do and that he understands happiness very well. At least in others. Sigh. 

So what is the conclusion? Sherlock either does not know himself (which I cannot really believe) or people have brainwashed him into thinking that he is dismissive, unaware and uncomprehending. Which with regard to Mycroft’s behaviour seems very plausible. And this is something he has to break free from, he has to liberate himself from this trap. Which, again, leads me to the idea that we are experiencing Sherlock’s self-experiment on how to break free of the limitations of 130 years. 

Tags under the cut

@ebaeschnbliah, @sagestreet, @sarahthecoat, @tjlcisthenewsexy,  @possiblyimbiassed, @raggedyblue, @someovermind, @shylockgnomes, @sherlockshadow, @hemlock-her-loss, @devoursjohnlock, @loveismyrevolution, @beingallmysterious, @i-believe-n-sherlock-holmes, @sherlock-overflow-error, @spenglernot, @the-signs-of-two​, @lukessense​

[cynical-mystic]

I didn’t think I’d like Elementary, but here we are.

I just finished a COVID induced binge of Elementary, and I have a lot of feelings.

First off, I’m furious with my teenage self for writing off this show after season one. This show is a beautiful representation of my two favorite literary characters, and I’m livid that the Sherlock hype made me write it off. Sherlock wishes it was this show.

I’m putting my feelings under a cut for spoiler purposes and length purposes.

Joan Watson is an icon. If you, for a moment, ever said to yourself, “Watson can’t be a woman” for WHATEVER reason, you should be ashamed. When a female Watson is done right, it’s magical. And this show is the embodiment of a female Watson done right.

The first thing that struck me about Joan Watson is how she dresses. She is fabulous. Constantly.

The second thing that struck me is that, unlike her original counterpart, she is not a bumbling idiot. Holmes chooses her because of how remarkable she is, not because it’s convenient. Her remarkableness is reinforced at every turn. Every person they encounter acknowledges that Watson is Holmes’ equal, including Holmes himself. Once she decides to become a detective, she is his partner in every sense of the word but a romantic one.

This leads me to my next point. From what I recall, everyone was complaining about Watson being a woman because there would be romantic undertones and they’d have sex and it would ruin everything blah blah blah. However, there is none of that. Yes, Watson is the person Holmes loves most in the world, but, newsflash, you can love someone deeply and have no romantic attachment/attraction to them! Another great thing about this is Watson feels exactly the same way about Holmes, and there is absolutely no “she loves him but he doesn’t love her so she spends the whole time pining for him in a romantic way” bullshit. Their relationship is the pinnacle of what it means to love someone completely without being romantically involved.

Some of my favorite Holmes/Watson love moments:

“For you, Watson, I would make adjustments.” - said in response to Watson being concerned about adopting a baby, it living in the brownstone with them, and how that would affect Holmes.

“I’m staying, Watson.” - Holmes finds out Watson has cancer and this is the first time Holmes hugs anyone on-screen of his own accord. He promises to stay with her to help her through it, even though he’s legally dead.

“We’re not partners. We’re two people that love each other.” - said to Watson by Holmes when he’s on the cusp of leaving for London after having confessed to a murder to keep Watson from taking the fall for it (she was innocent, btw; watch the show).

“The thought of her little boy coming home to find me on the floor with a needle in my arm” - Holmes telling Gregson about how he can’t stay; he doesn’t want to put Watson or her son in danger.

Watson telling Holmes’ father he needs more time with her as his sober companion, his father saying her time won’t be extended, and Watson staying with him even though she won’t get paid because she cares about him and wants to make sure he gets through the betrayal he just experienced.

Holmes telling Moriarty there are two people in the world she can’t predict and Watson rolling in like a bamf with Marcus and other officers to take Moriarty into custody, and Moriarty subsequently putting Watson and Holmes on the same level with regards to how she treats them.

Mycroft acknowledging that Watson is the person Holmes loves most in the world when they’re trying to find her after she’s been kidnapped.

Someone saying Ms. Watson should step out bc he doesn’t want her to see what he’s brought and Holmes going, actually she’s a doctor and can take whatever you’ve got.

“As long as we’re together, does it matter?” - the last line of the fucking show al;sndpiuahpoih[oaivhoej

These two had so many beautiful moments that were never romantically coded and that makes them so much better. They don’t need to be in a romantic relationship to be the most important person in each others’ lives. HIT ME WITH THAT KIND OF LOVE.

Now, for Sherlock Holmes. This is my favorite adaptation of this character. This Holmes goes from being a complete git to a lovable, quirky man so fluidly you don’t even realize it’s happened until you’re in the middle of it. Darcy, eat your heart out.

This Holmes also truly cares about the people he’s working with and/or for. Yes, he’s doing it for the work and the justice and the sake of solving problems, but he genuinely cares about people and can relate to them. Him being a recovering addict is probably the best thing he could have been. His body language and the meetings and everything about him show how hard he’s working to be a better person and how that’s coming across in his work. He doesn’t treat the people around him like objects to be used, but like people who are hurting. People who need help. Just...people. 

A human Sherlock Holmes? Who’s dealing with the repercussions of his past as an absolute arse in a legitimate, realistic way? Sign me the fuck up. I believe in Sherlock Holmes. In this Sherlock Holmes. Sherlock can suck it.

The last thing I want to touch on is this show’s use of the source material. It manages to have mostly completely original plots but sprinkle in some things for the Sherlockians in the most beautiful of ways.

When Watson is going through some clothes to lend to a friend, they find a deerstalker. Watson tells the friend to take it because Holmes never wears it.

They go to a convention of people dressed in costume and it cuts to two people who, from the back, appear to be Holmes and Watson dressed in clothing like the original characters’ but then it turns out to be two completely random people and Holmes and Watson are dressed normally.

“Hounded,” the episode based on The Hound of the Baskervilles? Stunning.

Cases randomly name dropped? Iconic.

Watson and Marcus going over a case obviously based on one of the original short stories? Beautiful.

Watson casually mentioning the three Garridebs and their story? Magnificent.

The modernization of the orange pip story? Marvelous.

This show is a beautiful representation of my absolute favorite piece of literature and I couldn’t be more pleased.

10/10, would recommend.

[beloved-child-of-the-house]

Fic Writer Questions! (you can find me here on AO3 if you're interested!)

tagged by dear @theburialofstrawberries mwah!

1) How many works do you have on AO3?

112 yowza!

2) What’s your total AO3 word count?

750,421 kinda tempted to go delete one word so it can be 750420 which is a far more Pleasing number

3) How many fandoms have you written for and what are they?

12ish but some of them overlap: BBCS/Sherlock Holmes/ACD (these are all different bc my bbcs fics are not the same as my own modern fem Sherlock Holmes adaptation are not the same as my ACD Holmes fic; Good Omens; Harry Potter/The Werewolf Draco Malfoy Cinematic Universe; Captive Prince; The Hobbit; Fleabag (it was a crossover with BBCS but Fleabag is the perspective character so it still counts as a separate fandom imo); Doctor Who; The Office; Parks and Rec; Broad City (one a piece for those last 5 but I AM going to write a Parks and Rec polycule fic for @gaykagome)

4) What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

They're all Good Omens fics from the 2019 Summer of Good Omens! Susceptible to Summer, Fragments Shored Against My Ruin, Something So Magic, Enter Serpent, and Anything We Like

All of those have over 2k except the last one, but average engagement for me is like 400 kudos or so

5) Do you respond to comments, why or why not?

I try! It depends on what's going on with me. Sometimes I just don't have the energy, and I figure people would rather I spend my brain power on writing new fics than on writing replies to comments. Wish I had a fave button tho so I could let people know I read and reread comments, because I do!

6) What’s the fic you’ve written with the angstiest ending?

Oh I wrote this ficlet series called A Chemical Defect about John and Sherlock's relationship in s3 of BBCS, and it's WILDLY unpopular. People don't read my fic to cry sad tears I guess! John and Sherlock are having an affair in the story, and it ends with the implication that their relationship is unsustainable and that Mary knows about it anyway. I intended to come back to it after s4 and write a more optimistic ending but LOL! Didn't have the heart.

7) What’s the fic you’ve written with the happiest ending?

I know this answer is kinda up my own ass, but like. I think stories that feel true to life sort of feel like they end on a beginning if you know what I mean? You don't really consider a chapter of your life closed until you look back on it from the next? SO that said, I think I'd have to say that it's my big BBCS serial The Only One in the World. I spent 2 years writing it, and it ends with John retiring from medicine to solve crimes and write books full time.

Could also be my WDMCU (werewolf Draco Malfoy cinematic universe) series Moonrise, which starts with Draco isolated in his abusive mother's house, trying to cope with lycanthropy essentially alone and ends with him in love and surrounded by found family in a cozy cottage in Hogsmeade, having gotten some lycanthrope rights legislation passed after working at it for years and talking to Harry about whether they want to have kids. Oh man I feel warm and fuzzy just thinking about it

8) Do you write crossovers? If so what is the craziest one you’ve written?

I have written one crossover. It's BBCS/Fleabag, because me and @loudest-subtext-in-tv were laughing about how John seems like one of the horrible guys Fleabag sleeps with basically out of self loathing, so I wrote this fic to make Nattie laugh, and you should read it bc it's so good and so underrated.

9) Have you ever received hate on a fic?

Not really, but people don't seem to know that authors can read bookmark tags unless you private the bookmark, and someone once put in the bookmark tag on one of my fics 'writing was meh but it was okay.' Okay so why bookmark it then??

10) Do you write smut? If so what kind?

Fuck yes! I'm not sure what 'what kind?' means? People fucking? Sloppy, silly, and awkward, with lots of laughing. I also really like writing afterglow scenes which are even sillier and gigglier and often involve one character cooking for another. Food as love language is a very distinct pattern of mine tbh

11) Have you ever had a fic stolen?

Not that I'm aware of, but occasionally I'll write a post on here where I make some elaborate head canon, and I'll see people in the tags talking about how they want to write fic of it, and it makes me breathe fire out of my nose like a dragon like PLEASE DON'T. The WDMCU came out of a ficlet post I made on here like a year before I actually wrote the 60k series so like!!! Please don't do that!

12) Have you ever had a fic translated?

Yes! To Russian and I believe Chinese. Not my entire oeuvre but a handful of BBCS and Good Omens fics

13) Have you ever co-written a fic before?

No, but I wrote a fic inspired by an RP I did with my gf right around when we met (actually now that I think about it, it's two fics), and I waaaaaaanna do a WDMCU collab with my beloved Sally @clytemenestras at some point if he has time bc he inspired me to even write werewolf draco with his original lesbian werewolf story

14) What’s your all time favorite ship?

favorites are hard for me? I always think I'm currently doing my best writing lol so I'll say drarry

15) What’s a WIP that you want to finish but don’t think you ever will?

I don't post fics unless theyre finished, so I don't have any WIP up on AO3, but I did intend to continue with my fem Sherlock Holmes series, Your Many Tendencies. I just haven't been in a Holmes mood for a long time. Maybe I'll come back to it idk. This particular series is honestly very unpopular? People will just straight up say they don't read femslash, and it hurts a lot. This series feels really personal too, bc it's about a Black autistic nonbinary lesbian, so it does hurt my feelings that no one seems to care, yknow? I mean the people who read it are extremely kind and thoughtful in their engagement with it, but it has vastly less engagement than my m/m fic, and that's painful. It gets literally 1/10 the attention my fics usually get.

16) What are your writing strengths?

Almost all of my writing is romance, but I tend to write concurrently about recovery and found family, and I think I'm very good at doing that in a way that connects with my audience. I once had someone ask if they could use my words in their wedding vows, and I've had people tell me they started doing things with their spouse that my characters do with their partners in order to express love. I think about that all the time. My Impact. It makes me feel like I have a real duty to my audience yknow?

17) What are your writing weaknesses?

This question is hard for me like I've been writing so long and so much that I'm literally always happy with my final draft! It's always exactly to my taste, yknow? I suppose I could say that my fics tend not to be terribly plotty but so WHAT? That's beside the fuckn point for me. Plot who? I don't know Her. Also honestly like. Stories feel more True to me when they aren't ruthlessly devoted to plot bc like life isn't like that yknow?

18) What are your thoughts on writing dialogue in other languages in a fic?

If you're not fluent in that language, get a beta who is!!!!! That said, I have written scraps of very simple dialogue in French using mostly Google Translate (sometimes I check w Sally bc he speaks French but I am usually too impatient), and I am perfectly well aware that I take my life in my hands each time!!! Also don't do that bullshit thing where it's in italics? That shit is weird and exoticizing. Just write it in quotation marks like normal dialogue.

19) What was the first fandom you wrote for?

BBCS babey back in 2012. Ended a 5 year dry spell for me after I got my writing degree.

20) What’s your favorite fic you’ve written?

Hmmmm I think it's probably gonna be the fic I'm working on now that I haven't posted yet, but I know it's called Names for a House, and here's a tiny bit of it

Thanks again Shreya for asking me to do this bc I really love talking about myself. I tag @the-moon-loves-the-sea, @clytemenestras, @tomiano, @gaykagome and @totallysilvergirl

No pressure <3

[krinsbez]

The Heroes, Future Season Picking

maxw@jcogginsa @skjam, @maxwell-grant

As it would appear discussion of Season One has come to a halt for the moment, this thread is for discussing Season Two.

Some ideas proposed thus far...

By @jcogginsa:

As I said previously , my idea for this one was to have the principal characters come together for Keane’s funeral before getting sucked into the season’s plot. To expand on that, what I think should happen here is that Keane was familiar with several other great detectives. After they leave his funeral, they get sucked into what looks like an Agatha Christie style whodunnit, which is eventually revealed to be something of a more supernatural flavor. The big name of this season could be an aged Sherlock Holmes, but if we don’t go with that, Watson would be a fun pick.

- General Zaroff, the antagonist of ‘The Most Dangerous Game’ sinks a cruise ship, which he believes Doc Savage is aboard, believing that Savage will survive and make it to Zaroff’s island, where he can hunt him for sport. Unfortunately, he’s misinformed, because the Savage aboard the ship is actually Patricia Savage, not Clark. She, along with other pulp heroes who were aboard, then have to deal with Zaroff. Possibly with the Wolfman and Tarzan involved

- The aforementioned “The Shadow vs Lovecraft” season. This would be a later season, since I think it’d be good if Fu Manchu had a more sizeable role in it, to show that while he’s a bad man, he’s not a “wants to end the world” kind of Bad man. Additionally, as a late act twist, I think it’d be nice for a Golden Age flavor of Superman to show up, as he is thematically a foil to Lovecraft

- While most of the seasons would be stand alone, I did have an idea for a loosely connected Trilogy of seasons featuring Sun Koh, the Nazi Doc Savage. One Season would deal with a search for Atlantis, and end with Sun Koh arriving in the present day. Then the season after that would featuring Conan battling Sun Koh in the distant past, and then the season after that would see Sun Koh suffering his final defeat at the hands of Doc Savage.

- A season set on Mars, featuring John Carter attempt to stop the Martian Invasion from War of the Worlds from getting launched

By @krinsbez:

-News of the Underworld: Belgian boy reporter Tintin is back in New York City, doing a ride-along with Justice, Inc. when they’re called in to investigate a gang that’s been robbing museums. But then their leader becomes convinced that one of the artifacts is posssesed by a demon and is talking to him (I think it should be ambiguous if he’s delusional or not), and begins planning something more grandiose than mere thefts, the Avenger calls upon…not sure. Someone with knowledge of mysticism and the occult, but not so much that no ambiguity exists.

-Skull and Crosswinds: In the midst of WWI, the 20th Phantom discovers that Robur the Conqueror’s ahead-of-his time flight technology has fallen into the hands of the European branch of the Singh Brotherhood, who plan to use the war as cover to plunder the continent from the skies with impunity. To stop them, he must somehow convince G-8 and Hans Von Hammer to work together.

-Black As Night And Red All Over: In ‘70s NYC, Shaft, Blade, and Vampirella join forces to defeat Blacula. Given the pun of the title, I thought about throwing in Kolchak, but A: I don’t know that much about him ATM, and B: What little I do know suggests he lives elsewhere?

Comments by @maxwell-grant:

Funny you mentioned wanting to bring Superman into the “Shadow vs Lovecraft” season, because I’ve been tinkering with my own Shadow - Superman crossover idea for a while now, that whole text I wrote about crossing The Shadow with Lovecraft spawned out a Shadow meets Superman text I haven’t finished yet.

The inclusion of Fu Manchu though? I’ll definitely keep it in mind. Although The Shadow, Fu Manchu, and the Cthulhu Mythos are such massive properties, such quintessential pillars of pulp fiction as well as fiction in general, that Superman’s inclusion might be either too much, or perhaps the right ingredient to pulling it all together. Definitely something I have a lot of ideas for but maybe better saved for later.

“The Most Dangerous Game” starring pulp heroes definitely sounds fun though. I think one of the things I most enjoyed about these posts is that they got me to think and write about characters I’d never given much thought prior. I’d definitely like to do more with further obscure choices.

@krinsbez

Here’s an idea for that Tintin x Justice Inc crossover. When The Avenger and Tintin investigate museum robbers who run afoul a mystical artifact that might be driving them to more sinister plans, they need someone who’s familiar enough with the occult and also with historical artifacts, and so they call…Indiana Jones. Benson would have preferred calling someone else but they are in a hurry and Jones was easy to reach. Indy wants absolutely nothing to do with the dead-faced creep who names his knives and the little kid running around in a trenchcoat and demonic artifacts and whatnot, but then he gets involved and goes along complaining about being dragged into another supernatural bullshit adventure, as usual.

Comments by @skjam:

The really obvious proto-Superman for pulp stories is Hugo Danner from “Gladiator” by Philip Wylie.  He dies at the end of the book, but this can easily be handwaved; perhaps a Snake Plissken-like “I heard you were dead” from everyone who recognizes him?

“Most Dangerous Game” with Pat Savage?  If you want to make things really tough for Zaroff, team her up with Jane Clayton, Lady Greystoke.  By the third Tarzan book, Jane’s the second-best person in the world at jungle survival.  (She drops back to third once their son reaches his teens.)

Additional comments by @jcogginsa:

Been thinking more about the great detective pitch I made, and I think good characters to use for that season would be Sar Dubnotai (who I only know of because of Maxwell Grant’s Pulp tarot), and Inspector Ginko from Diabolik

Additional comments by @maxwell-grant:

@skjam I think Hugo Danner is an interesting enough character that, while I do have some plans for him, I wouldn’t just use him as a Superman analogue.

@jcogginsa Sar is definitely a great choice, in fact it’s a logical choice to have him enter the scene as a response to Ascott Keane’s murder, since Sar is an occult detective as well, far older, more powerful and resourceful than Keane, and generally being a far more interesting character too.

I haven’t yet had a chance to read the original Sar Dubnotal stories but something I really enjoyed about the Tales of the Shadowmen stories I’ve read with him is that they emphasize him being a psychologist on top of everything else, so he lends himself into scenarios where he uses his magic to help characters dig into their pasts and deal with their trauma and so on, which is definitely something that sets him apart from other pulp heroes, even those with mystical powers.

The fact that he can speak with the dead could also allow us to include characters from different time periods. For example, maybe Holmes did die a while before the story began, but Sar has been receiving visions and guidance from Holmes in the afterlife that sets him on a trip to America where he has to help some of his detective friends deal with the aftermath of the murder of an American occult detective. That way, not every character we want to include outside of their time period needs to be immortal (although Sar may be, as even in his original 1910 stories he was hinted at being much older than he appeared, and now he’s going to be appearing in the 1930s presumably unchanged).

Sar can very well serve as the link that binds different characters and storytelling elements together.

Some thoughts of my own.

-On Hugo Danner: I have to agree with @maxwell-grant that just using him as a Superman analogue is not a good idea, not least because, asides from powers they are very different characters. Not sure using Superman is the best idea either, since he’s as close as you get to a bright shining line where Pulp Heroes stop and Super Heroes begin (given that there are plenty of superheroes who are 100% Pulp Heroes as far as I’m concerned, it’s not much of a line, but still)

-On what to do next: Obviously, I’m partial to my own ideas, but of @jcogginsa‘s ideas, I like the Detectives or Most Dangerous game one’s best. Which sentiment appears to be shared by the rest of you, so let’s go for it.

-On Detectives: Unfortunately, I’ve never even heard of Sar before, so I’m not confident of my ability to do stuff with him.

-On Most Dangerous Game: I love the concept, but I can’t buy Gen. Zaroff by himself as being a legitimate threat when Tarzan is involved? (as far as I’m concerned. kidnapping Jane is a form of suicide)

[thecleverdame]

Control and Release - 31

Series Masterlist

TEDTalk!Sam x Reader

Summary: After the rest of the staff is caught in a snowstorm, you find yourself acting as a personal assistant to the notorious Sam Winchester. As the arrangement becomes more defined, you and Sam begin a sexual adventure with dangerous consequences.  

Warnings: Dom/Sub, humiliation, embarrassment, sexual objectification, mutual masturbation, spanking, cum play, fingering, anal play, orgasm control, nipple clamps, dub-con, breath play.

Beta: @ilikaicalie

Parts 1-39 are currently available on Patreon for a monthly pledge of $2.50. This includes early access to all my stories, including Patreon exclusive content.  >> CLICK HERE <<

-

“These are all my dirty secrets?” You look in trepidation at the folder on the table in front of you.

 It’s thicker than anticipated. 

“Everyone one of them.” Charlie is a perky, energetic redhead that’s the exact opposite of what you expected. Sam’s talked about her like she’s Sherlock Holmes, and to be honest you assumed she was a man. “Or least what I could dig up. I can confidently say that if I couldn’t find it, no one else will either.” 

Glancing at Sam you open the cover and scan over the top page. It’s a basic list of your personal details, where you’ve lived, who you’ve dated. 

“Is there anything we should be concerned about?” Sam asks. He slides his arm over the back of the couch behind you. 

Charlie hesitates, looking at Sam and then speaks to you. 

“Are you comfortable doing this with him here? I mean, it can get real weird real quick for both of you.” 

“I can leave if you want,”  Sam offers. 

“No.” You swallow the urge to take him up on the offer. “No secrets, right? This is my life.”

“Okay.” Charlie opens her laptop. “There was a polaroid of you in your underwear at a party in your senior year of high school. But we had it taken off Facebook and I was able to purchase the original.”

“It was on Facebook?” You’re both horrified and impressed. You had no idea “How did you even find it?”

“It’s what I do,” she chirps, already moving on. “You’re pretty boring compared to the people I usually investigate. No DUIs or cheating. But you did date a man named Jasper.”

“Oh Jesus.” You want to crawl under the table. Your time with Jasper wasn’t as much a traditional relationship as a hook-up that lasted a year. He never came close to what you and Sam enjoy together, it was all about sex. “I’m sorry.” You turn to Sam who’s throwing you a terrifying, forced smile. 

“Don’t be sorry,” he murmurs, a hand slipping over your thigh and wedging between your legs. 

“Did you make a sex tape with him?” Charlie asks and you choke on your own spit. 

“No, I mean, I don’t think we ever…”

“Is there a chance he recorded you without your knowledge?”

“Maybe.” You search your memory. Everything from that time is hazy, the two of you drank a lot. “I mean, I don’t know. You think he recorded me?”

“I think he has something.” Charlie’s attention switches to Sam and she morphs into all-business mode. “He was interested in why I was asking questions. When I made an initial offer for any videos or pictures he might have he acted like he had something. But I think he realized it was valuable and kicked me out of his apartment.”

“You offered the maximum?” Sam asks. 

“Yeah, he didn’t go for it.”

“Double it and see what he does.”

“Got it.” She stops to make a note.

“He has a sex tape with me in it?” You’re not past this yet. You look to Sam who’s unreadable. “I had no idea. I mean I eventually realized he was a creep but I never thought he would do something like that. What if he posts it?”

“Don’t worry,” he nods, sliding a hand over your knee. “I’ll handle it.”

“Other than Jasper, you and Sam are actually the biggest potential issue. I read Cole’s report. It’s concerning despite your prior relationship. If the wrong person got a copy of his written complaint it would be damaging. I think you can expect the real story to revolve around the fact that Sam intervened when a mad man was shooting up the office. You can choose how you want to spin that. If you decide you want some heroic meet-cute to be the official story then I can erase any trace of your relationship before the shooting happened. If you want me to leave some crumbs confirming you were together prior, I can do that to. And if you want a lid on the whole thing, no problem.”

“People will care?” you ask. 

“Oh, for sure.” She chuckles, looking at you like you’re a moron. “Sam’s personal life has been a lockbox. You’re the most interesting thing that’s ever happened to him.”

“Wonderful.” This would all be so much easier if he wasn’t so well off. If he hadn’t been quite as successful all these precautions could be avoided. 

“Just tell me what kind of story you want out there and I’ll start planting the seeds.” She grins at Sam with a warm familiarity. Few people interact with him this easily. There must be quite a back story. 

“We’ll talk about it,” Sam answers for you, shifting in his seat. “Anything else?”

“That’s all for her.”

“You have my background as well?”

“I do.” She pulls a thinner file from her bag and you look at him in surprise. 

“She did one on you too?”

“Charlie has been the keeper of my secrets for a decade. She makes sure any possible indiscretions stayed buried,” Sam explains. 

Charlie is looking between you and Sam, asking a silent question. 

“You can say whatever you need to in front of her.” Sam turns to you. “You can leave if you feel uncomfortable.” 

You find yourself suddenly nervous. Sam’s past is largely a mystery and you’re not sure if you want to know. Were there others before you? 

“The woman you had a financial arrangement with is not a problem. It’s Madison I’m concerned about.”

Financial arrangement? That piques your interest but the conversation moves on. 

“It’s been years. You don’t think she’s gotten past it?” Sam shifts beside you, betraying his discomfort for the entire situation. He’s rarely visibly distressed but there’s no covering this up. His reaction may be subtle but it’s there. 

“She still Googles you once a week.” Charlie turns her computer toward Sam. You don’t understand you’re looking at, but he seems to. Sam takes interest in something on the screen and you feel him stiffen beside you. “She’s living in Boston again?”

“She moved back last year,” Charlie confirms. 

“You didn’t tell me.” Sam’s tone shifts to his trademark disapproval but it doesn’t seem to phase the perky redhead.

“I update when I think there’s a concern. This wasn’t a red flag for me. She’s from Boston. Her father is sick. She got a good job at a tech firm. It looks to me like she came home to be near her family...or...”

“Or?” Sam asks. 

“Or she came back to be close to you. It’s hard to tell with her. Madison has always been a wild card. You know how to pick ‘em.” Her eyes dart to you, offering an apologetic grin. “Present company excluded.”  

You just sit there taking in these new tidbits of information. A trail of breadcrumbs that lead to the story that was Sam’s life before you. 

“Do you think she would try to hurt Sam?” you ask and two pairs of eyes look at each other before turning to you. “Or me?”

“She’s not that kind of crazy,” Charlie assures you. “But she would love to embarrass Sam. Make things hard for him. She’s still pissed he cut her off.” 

“I see.” You sit back as they continue talking details. You’ll have questions for him later but right now your mind is swirling. Your ex hook-up has a possible homemade sex tape of you doing God knows what, and Sam apparently hired a hooker.

“And what about Dean and my father?” Sam squeezes your knee, bringing you to attention. 

“What about them?” You lean forward with interest. 

“They’re hard to track.” Charlie closes her computer and sits back. There’s no documentation of this inquiry. Nothing to tie either of them to the wanted Winchesters. 

“That can’t surprise you.” Sam nods. “But you’re good.”

“Yes, I am.” She offers a little bow of her head. “I had to track the weird to find them.”

“What do you mean?” you ask. 

“They like the crazy stuff, ghosts, and monsters. So I kept an eye out for any weird happenings. Some lady in New Jersey claimed a sewer monster stole her baby. And you’ll never guess who popped up in town at some shitty motel the next day.”

Taking out her phone she pulls up a photo and holds it out for you and Sam to see. It’s a grainy security camera shot of Dean with a baseball cap pulled over his face. 

“When was this?” Sam inquires. 

“Six weeks ago. Your brother is staying along the eastern seaboard. Investigating paranormal bullshit in Vermont, Maine, Connecticut. Occasionally he’ll pop up in the midwest, but for the most part, he’s staying close.” 

“To me.” Sam’s not asking, he already knows. 

“Yeah, that would be my guess. I did a sweep of your office buildings, homes and so on. I found a digital hole in your home security cameras. Someone created a backdoor into the system so they could have unfettered access.”

“He’s watching us?” Dean’s been on your mind ever since the encounter in the kitchen over a year ago. But now it seems your concerns were in fact warranted. 

“Maybe,” she continues. “It’s hard to tell with him. He might be watching. Maybe he’s visiting, editing the footage to cover his tracks. Or maybe it’s not Dean at all.”

“Who else would it be?” you ask, afraid of the answer. “FBI?”

“My father,” Sam sighs. 

“It’s a possibility.” Charlie shrugs. “Unfortunately it’s impossible to tell what they’re up to.”

“What’s your gut instinct?” Sam asks Charlie. 

“I think they’re keeping an eye on you...and her.” She looks you dead on. “If you want to know why your guess is as good as mine. They believe some insane stuff, Sam. End of the world, apocalypse wack-a-doo shit. They could just be trying to keep you safe. But there’s always the possibility of something else. Y/N was right to be concerned.”

“Perfect,” Sam laughs dryly, rolling his eyes. “This is the last thing I need right now.”

“I liaised with your new security guy.  He knows what’s going on with your family, Madison, the whole shebang. He’s working on Y/N’s apartment and your house to seal the leaks. I’ll schedule a meeting for the three of us when you get back to Boston.”

“Sounds good.” Sam stands as Charlie collects her things and you stay seated. “Thank you for everything. As always, you’re invaluable.” 

“That’s why you pay me the big bucks.” She laughs. “Nice to meet you, Y/N.”

“You too.” You wave her off, watching as Sam locks the door after her departure. He shoves a hand in his pocket, the two of you staring at each other in silence. 

“What are you thinking?” he asks.

“Oh, more than you wanna know.” Running a hand down your face you categorize the evening. Sex scandals, stalkers, fugitives from justice...where to start. “You paid for sex?”

“Technically, no.” Sam walks over to sit on the couch across the coffee table. 

“What does that mean?”

“It means I never fucked her.”

“Okay, but you hired a hooker?”

“Yes.”

“And didn’t have sex with her?”

“No.” His jaws ticks. He doesn’t want to answer these questions. “She sucked my dick. She allowed me to do things to her, but I never fucked her. Would you like the details?”

“Jesus,” you sigh. “No. God...fuck. And the other woman, Madison, she was your girlfriend?” 

“No. She and I had an arrangement. The same as you and I had when this started. She worked for W & S. It only lasted a few months. She became attached, somewhat obsessive. She believed we were more than our arrangement and I put an end to it.” He stares at you, still as a statue. 

“Okay.” You hate the very idea of him with someone else. The thought of another woman makes you angry, but he’s being honest, and honesty is everything so you swallow the urge to take it out on him. “What are we going to do about your family?”

“I’ll give you the details as soon as I have them,” he offers. “We’ll have increased security.”

“Good.” Racking your brain you try to make sure you’ve covered everything. “Oh! Jasper, are you sure Charlie will be able to get that video...if there is one, I mean.” 

“She has her ways and I have money. Everyone has a price. We just need to find his.”

You’re both quiet again. Things feel unsettled, awkward for the first time in a long time. And you only know one way to reset this feeling. There are times when having Sam in complete control makes you feel the safest. 

“Sam,” you start, watching him sigh in response. He’s expecting more questions. 

“Yes?” he asks, looking at you expectantly. 

“I’d like you to spank me now.” This request makes your cheeks hot with anticipation. His face morphs from controlled irritation to pure lust, eyes narrow, a grin pulling at his mouth. “With your belt.”

“Take off your clothes and lay across my lap,” he instructs, already working at his buckle. “Get the gag. We can’t have you making too much noise.” 

[writer-and-artist27]

Untimely Reunion

Summary: No one but the only Master in Chaldea’s staff could really make sense of the new Berserker Servant. He was much larger than any other Heroic Spirit, but the machinery and horse-like body showed he wasn’t a figure from Proper Human History. The last thing anyone expected was for him to be an Achilles’ Heel to their newest Crypter enemy.

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Note: This was inspired by my pulling of Xiang Yu in the gacha before even starting Lostbelt 3’s story. I had him in my party when first fighting Akuta Hinako and her Saber Servant, so I wanted to cover a possible version of how the fight would’ve gone had Xiang Yu saw our opponent with his own eyes.

Consider this to take place after all my other FGO oneshots, with MASSIVE HEAVY spoilers for Lostbelt 3: SIN. Also, CW for heavy angst and the occasional use of language. This has been unedited and written on a passing muse’s whims.

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Saber had leapt back into the fields of wheat, panting after taking two Noble Phantasms head on. Hinako clenched her teeth, tempted to bite the fingernail on her thumb. Of course he’d be weak. Those two attacks were stronger than anticipated.

Hell, Chaldea was more powerful than Hinako anticipated. From using a swimsuit version of what appeared to be the King of Knights (what the hell) together with the hero known for slaying Karna in a tag-team combo formation, no wonder Chaldea had defeated Ophelia and Kadoc. Vy, even when poisoned, was still alive and going strong, staring at Hinako with a determined look in her bespectacled eyes. Gao Changgong’s condition, from the sweat dotting his neck to the awkward way he was holding his sword, clearly showed that Hinako had brought the battle to Chaldea far too soon.

Goddammit.

“Is that all?” Vy said in an uncharacteristically gentle voice, standing to Mash’s right side as she clenched her right fist. All three of her Command Spells glowed in the sunlight, exuding confidence as her eyebrows narrowed. “Because if you want to keep fighting, Hinako-san, I can do this all day. Poison or not.”

Hinako did her best to not huff, channeling all her disgust and anger into returning Vy’s gaze. “Take your win for now, Chaldea. I underestimated you,” she said instead, shaking her head. “Saber.”

Gao Changgong stood to attention. “Yes, Master.”

“We’re retreating.” We need to come up with a better plan so that the Emperor does not deem me unworthy…

“Of course, Master.”

The last thing Hinako expected before Saber could run and grab her was that voice.

“YU MEI-REN!”

Every single drop of her blood froze. No. No. No one on Chaldea’s side should know that name. Hinako had discarded that name eons ago. Right now, Hinako was still—

Wait. Kadoc had mentioned that Vy had summoned a Lostbelt Servant before his Lostbelt had fallen. Scathach-Skadi, the Lostbelt King of Scandinavia — she had gone about cursing Kadoc and his Servant the entire time before Russia’s Tree of Emptiness was cut down, contrasting the gentle demeanor she seemed to have according to Ophelia. So... could it be? Could Vy really have that kind of luck again?

Against Gao Changgong’s urgent cry of, “Master!”, Hinako turned her head and found herself staring into green eyes.

The figure was tall and hulking just like his counterpart in this Lostbelt, but exuding power and gentleness that she couldn’t mistake for anyone else.

Vy had stepped to the side of the large Servant, her own brown eyes wide past her glasses as she murmured, “Berserker…?” in a respectful and shocked tone.

“My wife,” Xiang Yu whispered softly, one of his hooves making a heap of dirt in the field they were in as he stepped forward. “Even after all these years, I still can recognize you, Yu Mei-ren, new clothes or not. My only consort, the only woman I ever loved. But my wife, what are you doing? And…” The hulking Servant paused, his gaze going over to Saber before his eyes widened, his glowing green maw dropping for a moment in surprise. “Gao Su too?”

“No…” Saber whispered weakly. He must have recognized the severity of the situation too. “Why are you with them? I could have sworn that you were still with—”

With us.

Hinako felt tears start to bud in the corners of her eyes. She had only seen the Lostbelt version of him mere seconds ago. But now, seeing this version of him, at Vy’s side, better armed, far stronger and more majestic… “Lord Xiang Yu.”

The Berserker Servant smiled wryly at her, his green eyes soft in spite of his opposing figure. “My wife. I see you are still wandering.”

“Wha—”  

Mash Kyrielight was looking between all three of them with growing shock, her jaw slowly dropping before she turned to Vy. “M-Master, what is going on? Why is he calling Akuta—”

“I-I don’t know,” Vy’s voice came out wispy in the reply. “Berserker just moved forward on his own, and…” She put a hand over her heart, pressing her palm against her Winter Mystic Code. “It feels like he knows her somehow.”

Sherlock Holmes had a hand to his chin, already looking like he was deducing what was going on. Bastard.

“Yu Mei-ren, you are not the kind of person to go along with a crusade that would doom everything,” Xiang Yu continued, not minding the side chatter as his hooves went about tapping the ground underneath him in a familiar melancholic tune. “I remember you being so much kinder than that. Why are you assisting the enemy?”

Hinako was shivering. “But, but, Xiang Yu, it was for…” The shock was slowly turning to anger. Why? Why why why, why? Why couldn’t she have summoned someone else? Why did the last Master of Chaldea have to summon him— “VY!”

Vy jumped about a centimeter into the air, all attention having gone back to her. “What?”

“How—” Hinako grit her teeth. “How dare you!?”

“How dare I what?” Vy filled in with the slightest bit of sarcasm, giving Hinako an incredulous look. “How dare I live? How dare I summon Berserker? You realize you helped in destroying the world I’m currently trying to save, right? Not to mention that one of your fellow allies/cronies poisoned me? Kinda not in the mood for—”

“SAVE YOUR BULLSHIT!” Spittle flew out of Hinako’s mouth just as Saber rose to take her into his arms, his grip shaky and frantic. Vy fell silent as she stared back at Hinako in surprise. “To summon him and use him for your own gains, you’re a monster! HOW DARE YOU USE HIM AGAINST ME!”

“Er, I have no clue what you’re talking about,” Vy added in a quieter voice, barely hitting the inflections of a deadpan. “I just summoned him two days ago.”

So before Chaldea had even entered China. GODDAMMIT.

“Yu Mei-ren…” Xiang Yu said softly. “You’re wrong. I willingly came to her, not in the manner of what you are thinking—”

“Silence, pretender. Do not call me by that name.” 

The Berserker flinched, but still took to drawing one of his swords and holding it protectively in front of Vy. Hinako bit the inside of her cheek hard enough to taste iron. Whywhywhywhy, why. It shouldn’t have been like this.

Lord Xiang Yu wasn’t supposed to be drawing one of his weapons on her—

“Master,” Saber said urgently, his one hand on her shoulders clenching tightly. “We have to go.”  

“Yu—”

“E-Enough of this.” Hinako forced herself to look away, burying her face into the front of Gao Changgong’s clothes. She already knew that if she looked at that Servant any longer, she would be tempted to cry. “Even if you look like him, you are nothing but an imposter of someone I know. Saber, we’re retreating. NOW.”

“As�� As you wish, Master,” he said hesitantly, tightening his grip on Hinako’s figure. “May… May we meet again, Lord Xia— Berserker.”

Hinako held back a scream of anguish once Saber took the first leap away from those fields.