#'hey! the way you talk reminds me of an ex friend! please don't talk anymore!'

[mental-and-exhausted]

I know why their advice and encouragement made me feel worse in the end... They remind me of an ex friend who recently abandoned me with little rhyme or reason and fucked off to who knows where.

There are a few similarities between them that I could list, but the main one is that they speak very similarly. Going back and rereading what they sent me, I realized that I could easily imagine my ex friend saying the same things that this person did..

[tan1shere]

The 30th

Billie Eilish x female reader !

A/n: was listening to this today and I had to write for this song, I actually love it. I hope you enjoy the story, it's actually one of my favs :,)

Summary: You got in a crash, after something bad was happening, you had called billie leaving her worried after you hung up, and didn't respond to her texts.

Warnings: angsty angst. Car crash, a hospital, depression, arguments ??, happy ending 😇

Masterlist

Things weren't like they were. Things were harder now that she wasn't in your life as much. And God you missed her. You had just gotten out of a toxic relationship. Your best friend, Billie had gone distant because of that.

"She's manipulating you and you can't fucking see it." She screams. You two were currently in an argument. "Stop this." - "No actually that's a lie you do see it you just don't want to admit the fact she's using you." Angry tears run down your cheeks. "Be quiet, you don't know what you're saying right now." Her head shakes. "I don't know what you're saying right now. You're not you, Y/n. You haven't been ever since you got with that son of a bitch." You slap her, out of instinct. Things fall silent. Fuck, why'd you do that? She stares at you. After a moment you speak. "I just think you're jealous." She scoffs. "Of what being in an abusive relationship?" - "No! Because she gets to have me and you don't."

Silence, yet again. "You know." She begins, everything's still, quieter. "Even if that was the case. I certainly don't want this version of you."

And that was the very last time you spoke to her. I mean how can you even communicate after a fight like that. The way she left shortly after. You loved Billie she's been there for you through it all, ever since you were kids. Everything feels so empty without her. She was your everything. And now that's all gone. You knew she didn't even want to see you right now. But you desperately needed to hear her voice.

The breakup had ended horrible. You told her you just couldn't anymore, because Billie was right. She was right about everything. You told your ex that she was infact mentally abusing you. Violently fucking up your brain. And just as you thought, she took it terribly. She started to scream at you, things breaking. Your heart aching. You wanted to get away but you were scared. All you could think of was Billie but she wasn't even near you. She's gone from your life. And you don't blame her.

It was all your fault, you chanted. All your fault. "Hey! You fucking listen to me." You hear your now ex's rough voice booming in your ears. Your attention back on her. "Can you please calm down-" "No I fucking won't. Was it her?" Your eyes roll slightly having enough, you were tired. "No, Bee. It wasn't her, i don't even talk to her anymore thanks for the reminder." She stares at you. "Did you two have something going on?" You sigh out, going to leave. She grabs your arm gripping tightly. "I asked you, a question." "Even if I had, why do you care you're most likely sleeping with others." She went quiet. You weren't stupid. Staying so long with her? Yeah that was stupid. But you knew everything all along. You knew she was using you but you lied to yourself. "Fine, whatever I don't even give a rats ass anymore. You were pathetic anyways."

You were laying on your couch, trying to feel something. Shouldn't you be happy she's gone? You should. But you're not. You don't have anyone, what's the point in anything when life is as dull as it is. Silent tears still escaping your eyes. You didn't want to be here anymore. Should you pack up and leave? Move out of the country, start a new life? You knew you had to do one thing before any of that. You grab your phone and dial her number.

"Hello?" She answered after 5 rings. She really answered. You take a second finding it so foreign to hear her voice again after months.

"Me and her broke up, sorry I was such a bad friend, you were right about everything - I love you."

And just like that you hung up. You didn't want to even know her response. Quickly getting up and grabbing a duffle bag, packing it and heading out to your car. Those tears still spilling from your eyes. But you didn't even know why, they just kept coming.

You were driving on the motorway, hearing your phone ding like crazy. Eyes faintly blurry. Your sobs eventually came out of you. You hadn't properly cried in such a long time it's like you needed this. But the unthinkable happens and you almost forgot you were driving. Everything happened so fast. Everything went black.

Billies View.

It was November the 30th. I was sitting at home, but the day just felt odd. I couldn't pin point why. Until my phone started to vibrate, I look to see her name pop up. I stare in disbelief. I didn't know if I should answer. But I ended up doing so. "Hello." I say, wondering what this was about. Then I hear her voice. Her sweet soft voice. But it wasn't as sweet than I remembered. Wasn't as soft. It was dull, full of exhaustion. "Me and her broke up, sorry I was such a bad friend, you were right about everything - I love you."

Those were the last words I heard before she hangs up. My heart rate quickens sensing my feelings were right about this weird day. Something bad was about to happen.

I spam her phone, trying to get her to message me back. When there's nothing I'm immediately in my car. Knowing exactly where to go. Knowing her mind. But as I get on the motorway the cars are piled up. Fuck, fuck. Fuck. Then that makes more panic rise inside me, it's early in the morning why is there so many cars backed up. Then I see the vehicle I truly did not want to see. "No.." I breathe out. I didn't care about the traffic, it wasn't moving anyways so I get out of my car. Run down the side to try get to the ambulance. This can not be happening, please be a nightmare. "Wake up Billie. This isn't real." Oh but it was. I see her car upside down, and my heart sinks down to my ass.

I sprint to the ambulance, seeing her body, still. On the small stretcher. "Woah-" "im family." I sternly say. I was getting in there whether he liked it or not. "Family?" The male infront of me inquires. I think for a second. "Girlfriend." Did I really just say that. The other guy nods at the one infront of me. "Let her on." I go over to her instantly. I felt sick to my stomach, her skin pale. My brows knit together. "Shes unconscious, and quite injured." But that's all I heard them say. My ears ring, head spinning. Everything about this broke my heart.

Readers view.

You couldn't shake the slight throbs through your head. Your eyes opening slightly, feeling as if you were in a car. A groggy groan comes out of you. Your eyes then open enough to see someone above you. How did you even get here was the only thing running through your mind. "Y/n?" You hear faintly, your eyes open fully now. Seeing Billie. You were in an ambulance? You were still trying to remember everything. "Love?" You then hear her say. "W-what happened?" It comes out muddled but she understood. "You got into a crash." As soon as she says that it's slowly coming back to you, every feeling, flooding you entirely. "Why a-are you here tho? How'd you k-know." Your voice was incredibly weak.

"You don't remember calling me.." She breathes. "Huh?" Billie shakes her head. "Nothing- what do you remember?" She asks. You think for a moment. "Breaking up with her- a-and then falling asleep on my couch after she left." You say, looking at her. "I don't really remember the rest or how I got here-" She nods as you say that. Not before your eyes start to slowly close.

You were awoken by a beeping, adjusting to the slight light in the room. You look around noticing you were in a hospital on a bed. You turn to see Billie laying slightly on a chair in the corner, asleep. How long has it been, you wondered. You continue to look around, going to move when a pain shoots through your side. You winced in pain. Causing Billie to stir awake. She looks at you. "Hey, take it easy." Her soft voice, followed by her coming over was truly comforting. Her eyes stare at your own. "You look pretty." She then says, grabbing your hand, placing it in her own. A small smile was to be seen on your face. Your smile. The one she always made you do before you had changed. You were happier then.

"Billie.. I'm scared." You then say, she takes a moment. "Me too. They haven't told me about what's going on, probably because I'm not immediate family." She sighs. But for your sake she knows you need reassuring. "You'll be ok though, you're here right now right?" You nod gently. "My side really hurts-" "the meds must be wearing off. They said if you woke up to press this button and it'll inject some into you." Everything felt normal again between the both of you... key word, felt.

Months go by and you slowly get back into eachothers lives, but something was still missing. It was her. And not in the way previously. You've always loved Billie. But maybe it was a romantic love. You wanted to be hers. Everything was dull still. You had ended up squishing your ribs slightly in the crash, so that was in the process of healing. Along with your heart. It was a Sunday, you were just watching TV when Billie was going to come round. She opens the door eventually, waving at you. You wave back. She had sensed you still weren't yourself, she saw it. However It wasn't always, you tried your hardest to put on a smile for her majority of the time.

Today however was a hard day, your mind would not shut off and you just couldn't bare trying to fake it. She then comes over to you. Needing to talk about everything. You had requested that there'd be no talk of any of it till you were ready but she needed to get some things off her chest.

"Sometimes you look the same.. just like you did before the accident." You look at her, emotionless. "Shes out of your life now-" "I know. But I still feel empty inside Billie." There was a soft silence. "I know you don't remember calling me. Right before the accident. You said you loved me." Was she piecing this feeling you were feeling together. It was coming back to you. You had called her and said that. "I know it wasn't a friendship kind of 'I love you'." You didn't know how to respond to her, keeping your gaze on her. "I need to know if it's true. Or if I'm going insane, because if it is true. Tell me." You still say nothing, feeling tears pool in your eyes, knowing how miserable you've been because you don't have her the way you truly wanted.

She needed to confess something.

"What if it happened to you on a different day. What if you hadn't called me beforehand. What if it was on a bridge where there wasn't a rail in the way, What if you fell into deep water and no one could find you. If you changed anything would you not of survived." Now she's tearing up, frantically saying all these things that have been deep inside of her for far too long. "You're alive, you're alive. You're. Alive." You leap forward bringing her into a hug not even caring about your rib. You hug her so tightly. She gently hugs you back holding you close, whispering into your hair. "Your alive." - "I'm inlove with you Billie." You speak into her shoulder, crying yourself. Crying hard.

She pulls you back grabbing your face gently. "I'm inlove with you too, and seeing her break you like she did. Hurt me. Knowing I could've done better, in a good way. I would've protected you. Cared for you. Love you. The way you always deserved." You smile at her. Your true smile and this just makes her say the next 2 words. "Be mine." Your smile widens. "How could I ever say no." You both smile, leaning in and kissing one another tenderly.

Let's just say she was forever thankful for that call that day.

[hyunjilicious]

in human form [bang chan × f!reader]

A/n: this is very, very self indulgent. I always try to make my fics reader inclusive, but since I poured my soul out in this, it's not 100% a self insert. It's not OC either, but some aspects of Y/n past are mentioned - mental health and relationship with her parents. I hope you'll still enjoy it! 🥺

Summary: fresh out of a toxic relationship, you realise your best friend Chan might not be just that, your best friend. Angst (and fluffy and extremely cheesy) best friends to lovers trope. 8.5k (hit me)

Warnings: y/n's ex was toxic, so was her father, mentions of alcoholism (as the source of some of the issues), anxiety, insecurities, past traumatic experiences (not detailed). It's not as sad as I may have made it sound, Chan's a sweetheart and there for you from beginning to end ❤️

For the first time that night, when you felt a hand against your back, you relaxed. "Do you want me to drive you home?" Chan asked, leaning into your side so you could hear him over the loud music at the club.

Aside from the hand that still rested between your shoulder blades, he kept his distance. 

"No, it's fine, thanks" you shook your head but then smiled in appreciation. "I'll take a cab, you don't have to leave"

"Do you want to talk to me?" 

Another offer he didn't have to make - another one you desperately wanted to accept but felt like an asshole doing so.

"I'm annoyed. I don't want to start this right now. We can talk another time"

"I'm here for you" he reminded you, "Please, just let me take you home."

"You don't feel like dancing anymore?"

Chan shook his head. He never felt like dancing in the first place, only came so that he could spend some time with you, but unfortunately the night didn't go as planned. 

"I don't want to ruin your night"

"You're not ruining my night, Y/n" Chan said sternly, "I want to go home too"

"Then why didn't you leave earlier?"

That, he couldn't answer. He knew why, but he couldn't really tell you that the pain you've been struggling to hide has been obvious to him from the very beginning. Instead, he hid his worry behind little acts of kindness, reassuring words and unconditional support, without expecting anything in return. Much like he did now.

"Felt like a party pooper, but you're my ticket out of here. So? Should we go?"

You were unsatisfied with his answer, felt guilty for the way things were going, but you weren't about to make him ask again. "Ok, let's go"

His face lit up hearing your words, it felt like a win which he hoped would be the end of the story, considering that the last time he thought this nightmare was over, this night happened. So, determined to not allow the universe to mess with you again, Chan took a step to the side and motioned for you to lead the way towards the exit. 

And you would've done just that had an overwhelming sense of pain and warmth not washed over you, and instead of moving, you just went in for a hug. Despite being taken aback, Chan wrapped his arms around you instantly, repeatedly kissing the top of your head during the few seconds you spent pressed against one another. 

"Thanks" you mumbled, wiping away a stray tear that fell down your cheek as you pulled away. 

"You don't need to thank-" he began saying but before he could finish the sentence, you felt another hand against your back, one that sent chills down your spine. 

As if burned by the touch, you jumped away and didn't even bother looking at the person before you grabbed Chan's hand and tried to pull him away. 

"Hey, where the fuck do you think you're going?" the menacing tone of your exboyfriend called over the loud music. Even though he wasn't drunk enough to have trouble articulating his sentences, you could still hear the alcohol induced hostility in his tone. 

And as if raising his voice at you wasn't enough, in the blink of an eye he also went to grab you, but even though you were fast enough to step out of his reach, so was Chan as he grabbed the man's wrist and pushed himself between the two of you. 

"Hey, hey, hey! Step back" Chan commanded, not one single hint of uncertainty in his tone. 

"Why?" your ex boyfriend sneered, "Need her?"

Even though a vein was about to burst on his forehead, Chan fought to keep his composure. "Let's not make a scene, ok? Y/n's going home and you're going back to the party. Let's just leave it at that"

"How about this?" he slapped his hands together, "How about you stop sticking your nose in my business and let me have a talk with her?"

"We really don't have anything to talk about, ok?" you tried, but he wasn't having it. 

"Just because we broke up doesn't mean you can go whore around. At least wait a while before you hop on someone else's dick. Or wait! You've done it before, haven't you?" he turned to Chan. "You already fucked her, didn't you? You're the reason she broke up with me?"

"Man, you have no idea what you're saying" Chan rolled his eyes, "But why don't we have this talk another time, huh? This is really not the time and place"

"I agree. So why don't you just step away so I can talk to Y/n?"

"Talk to her?" Chan laughed, "Mate, don't even look at her"

That angered him - you saw it in his eyes and it terrified you. That look of his whenever he had enough to drink so that common sense didn't have a place in his behavior anymore, when limits stopped meaning anything and only his words mattered. 

Under different circumstances, you'd have said this wasn't something you'd ever do, but you felt afraid - viscerally, down to your bones scared, and without thinking, you jumped behind Chan. And while on high alert as he was, even though he might have not seen you, he felt you, the way your hands gripped his shirt and it brought a storm inside his mind. He didn't know what he wanted to do first, break that man's teeth or comfort you, but his adrenaline had kicked in and all that he could focus on was keeping his calm.

"Listen, I've got nothing against you, man. It's her that I need-" and his sentence was cut short by a very calm Seungmin, who with his drink in his hand and the straw between his lips, stepped in between your ex boyfriend and Chan.

"The group's over there" Seungmin addressed the man - fully facing him, and pointed in the direction you just came from, "Why are you all the way over here?"

"Yeah" Felix, who you hadn't noticed until now, nodded along, "We were thinking about going to a different club but we couldn't find you"

They stepped closer to one another, forming a wall between you, Chan and your ex, and bombarded him with questions, pointing in all directions and speaking loudly one over the other. 

There had been maybe one or two attempts from your ex to push past them, but before he managed to escape their pestering, Chan had already grabbed your hand and ushered you towards the exit. 

"Hey, are you ok? What are you doing?" he desperately asked as soon as you stepped on the sidewalk. Seeing you with your nose buried into your phone was the last thing he expected.

"I'm texting Felix and Seungmin" you sniffled, "I hope he didn't start a fight"

"They got this, Y/n, it's ok" Chan said and then tried to get you to move. "Let's go to the car, ok?"

After wiping one more tear from your cheek and pressing the send button on the text you just wrote, you nodded and followed him, "Yeah, ok"

Despite the hurricane of thoughts inside your mind, for most of the drive, you were silent - wanting to say so many things but at the same time, fearing what it would feel like if you yourself were to hear those things being spoken out loud, let alone Chan. 

After your phone buzzed with a new notification, you turned to him, "They got him an uber. He's on his way home"

"Good" Chan nodded and drummed his thumb against the steering wheel. "Fuck him"

"Yeah.. fuck him"

"Are you ok?"

At this hour of the night, the roads were empty enough to allow Chan to steal glances and turn to you, but still you were grateful he was driving - he couldn't fix you with his eyes.

"Yeah, I'm fine"

"Fine as in fine or fine as in fine?"

You really didn't want to do it, but his question made you giggle. "What? I really am ok, I'm just annoyed"

He looked at you for another second, "Do you want to talk about it?"

"About what? Complain to you about how big of an asshole he was and about how stupid I am? Where's that gonna get me?"

"First of all, you're not stupid. At all, Y/n. You know that"

"My actions and decisions over the past few months would beg to differ, Chan." you sighed, "It's not his fault he was a piece of shit boyfriend to me, it's my fault I stayed in that relationship for as long as I did"

Too many words, some even a bit aggressive and thoughtless, almost rushed past his lips, but he managed to compose himself with a shake of his head and a deep breath. "I really don't want to be that person, Y/n, but you know traumatic experiences don't necessarily involve heavy and obvious shit. You've never been through something like this before, how were you supposed to know what the right thing to do was? You really did your best with what you had"

"Stop. You're making it sound like I'm some sort of victim or something. There's no trauma. He was never violent, never raised his hand at me or anything, it's not that serious"

"A person doesn't have to be physically violent in order to be abusive"

"He wasn't abusive. Just… toxic. It wasn't that big of a deal"

"If it wasn't that big of a deal, why are you so upset with yourself for being, as you say, stupid about it?"

Ah fuck, a red light. It wasn't like the intersection was that busy anyway, and it got you very close to offering to pay the fine only so that he'd keep driving. But his eyes were already on you, ready to pierce right into your soul the second you met them. 

"What do you want me to say?" you looked down at the bag in your lap. "I don't see where you're going with this"

"I want you to stop being angry at yourself. To stop blaming yourself. To realize you were not the problem. That's all I want"

"If that's really the right way to look at things, it's gonna take me a long fucking while" you chuckled bitterly, tone full of spite and anger. 

But still, Chan's voice was as calm and sweet as ever. "And I'll be here for you until then. And after. Ok?"

You really had no right to be this cold to him. "Look at you being so wise and selfless. Try telling me again that I'm not just a stupid girl who needs looking after"

"Y/n, if the roles were reversed, would you think I was stupid? Would you defend the person that repeatedly hurt me?"

"I'm not defending him"

"That's exactly what you're doing by putting all the blame on your own shoulders. I'm not saying you should crucify him, although I would, all I'm saying is that you shouldn't carry this weight. If he refuses to own up to his shit and try to do better, that's on him, but you shouldn't be the one to take responsibility for this just because he won't do it"

Although the things he was saying made sense from the very beginning, it was getting harder and harder for you to keep up with the conversation. A short period of silence followed where you didn't know what to say, but your ticket out of this tensioned position came at the perfect time.

"Light's green" you said and pointed to the traffic lights after seeing Chan make no effort to start the car.

He blinked for a second, looked in the rear view mirror and then turned to you again, "There's no one behind, it's fine"

"Chan! Drive"

"Y/n, look at me"

There was a very strong reason you avoided his stare during this whole car ride, and it was getting harder and harder to manage your emotions. "I can't"

"Why?" his voice broke a little "It's just me, Y/n, it's ok"

You squeezed your eyes shut and threw your head back, "Please, I don't want to start crying right now, just start the car. Just drive"

And he did. He wordlessly followed your request and drove in silence for as long as he could, but when he reached the intersection next to your neighborhood and had to stop at another red light, he couldn't help himself. "Y/n, do you want to be alone right now?"

"I don't want to continue that conversation" 

"It's not what I asked," Chan softly said. "I won't bug you, I promise. But I'm here if you just… don't want to be alone at home"

"Are you sure it's ok?"

"Of course, I wouldn't have offered if it wasn't"

"You totally would've" you weakly laughed, "You always put other people first."

He didn't know how to tell you that it was you who he was putting first - not other people. Sure, he cared about his friends, but he wasn't doing this because he was a caring person, he was doing this because he cared about you. And on top of that, he hoped that this night he was about to spend with you would be the first one on a long, maybe endless, list of things he planned on doing in order to make sure that you finally realized that, even if you hadn't seen it before, to some, to him, you really did come first. 

After that, Chan offered to go to the drive through two blocks away for some food, but the laziness prevailed. You wanted to get home faster and weren't about to let him go by himself, so as he searched for a parking spot behind your building, you tapped in the order on your phone and placed it before entering your apartment.

While the atmosphere was still somewhat tense, you two managed to enjoy the food and down two liters of tea without any upsetting topic being brought up. 

By the time you decided to head to bed, it was already half past 4. And if Chan had to insist on taking the couch, you also insisted on making it as cozy for him as possible, bringing him 3 different blankets, 4 pillows and an army of stuffed animals to keep him company. 

But while fatigue had already crept up your spine and made your eyelids feel heavy, sleep only circled around you and refused to settle. It was your buzzing mind and hurricane of thoughts that kept the sleep at a safe distance, and it was just a matter of time until you had to get out of bed.

This was why you insisted he took your room, so that now, when you wanted to go into the kitchen, you wouldn't have to walk past him. But since there was nothing to be done about it now, you settled for tiptoeing your way to the sink, filling up a glass of water and downing it in the blink of an eye.

Truth be told, you wanted another tea, but the sound of the boiling water would for sure wake Chan up. Maybe a pudding would do, you thought to yourself as you licked the lid before throwing it into the trash. It was good, your favorite - no surprise since you were the one who bought it, but it didn't do much. Chips? Nah, and even if you wanted some, you forgot to get a new bag anyway. Then.. fruit? But after tea and pudding? Also a no. 

It was getting annoying - nothing to keep you busy so you wouldn't have to return to your room. The one obvious option that was left made you cringe. You wouldn't do that, he had been so nice to you all night, it would be very shitty of you to disturb his sleep. Or maybe… he had been so sweet to you all night, he definitely wouldn't mind being sweet a bit more, right?

So without giving yourself the chance to change your mind, you took off towards the couch, your eyes fixed on his sleeping - or not, frame. The way he raised his arm, along with the blanket, almost startled you.

"Come here" he chuckled, before even looking at you.

"Did I wake you?"

"Nope, I wasn't sleeping" he said and then waved his arm in the air, "Come on"

Your first instinct was again to ask if he was sure about it, but you brushed it off and climbed in beside him, cuddling against his chest as he wrapped his arm around your frame, covering you with the blanket all the way up to your cheeks.

"Thank you" you said, all your muscles relaxing under the warmth of his body pressed to yours. "I'm sorry I was mean to you earlier"

"You weren't mean to me" he shook his head. As a small but strong reassuring gesture, his fingers made their way to the back of your neck and lost themselves in your hair. He lightly scratched your scalp as he spoke. "The conversation wasn't pleasant so you just weren't as bubbly as usual, that's normal. You weren't mean to me, Y/n, don't worry"

"I really wasn't the nicest though"

"You don't have to be the nicest with everyone all the time"

"Not with everyone, with you. You have the biggest heart in the world, I don't ever want to upset it"

"That's ok" Chan hummed, kissing the top of your head, "She understands, you didn't upset her."

"Your heart is a she?" you giggled.

He wasn't going to say that his heart was a she because you were his whole heart - that would've been cheesy, but it was late and the love of his life was wrapped around him, so he didn't judge himself for it, just brushed the thought aside. "I don't know why I said she," he lightly chuckled, "It felt right, I guess?"

Without saying anything, you cuddled closer so that you could press your ear against the left side of his chest. He felt calm around you, but his heart drummed against your cheek and it made you feel closer to him and safer than ever, "Thank you"

"Anything for you" Chan hummed, allowing the both of you to finally relax enough to be able to fall asleep. 

The next morning came and went, neither of you showing any signs of planning to wake up any time soon. A little bit past noon however, maybe around 1pm, Chan started stirring in his sleep. When he opened his eyes and checked his phone, the urge to just say fuck it and remain in your soft embrace almost won. But he had another thing on his mind, probably the only thing in the world that could've ever gotten him to leave that couch. 

For a split second he thought it would be rude to rummage through your kitchen so he stopped dead in his tracks and looked at his shoes by the front door. He could go out and buy the ingredients he needed to make breakfast, but what if you heard the door and woke up, that would ruin the surprise. Plus, in the past, he'd been given free access to absolutely everything in your apartment, why would this morning be any different. 

"Jesus, why am I like this, calm down, it's just an omelet" Chan said to himself as he opened your fridge and got to work.

Shortly after, you woke up too. Disappointment hit him a bit when he realized he couldn't surprise you with food anymore, but one thing he didn't know he needed in his life was a cooking session with you. There were so many little things he didn't know about you, so many things that he was so ready to love - the ridiculous amount of kitchen towels you used, the fact that you washed your hands a hundred times while cooking because who wants to touch the cheese with tomato juice on their fingers, the fact that there was a picture of a random dog you thought was cute on one of your cupboard doors and so on. He didn't have to try hard to find something to make him giddy inside, not when he was so close to this genuine, unbothered and honest version of you.

Once the food was done, you both took your seats across from one another at the table, and the topic of discussion you had just started swiftly melted away in favor of comfortable silence and the occasional utensil clatter.

"Hey, um, can I ask you something?" you questioned as you toyed with a piece of bread on your plate. "And please don't be afraid to humble me in case I'm reaching"

"Sure, what is it?"

"Am I the reason you haven't even looked at any type of alcohol whenever we went out during the past few months?"

Even though he wasn't facing you, instead staring down at his food, you still saw his eyes widen in.. embarrassment maybe? "I um… I hoped you wouldn't notice"

His reaction only made you soften further, a very strange warm feeling spreading from the middle of your chest. "You didn't have to do that, Chan"

"I know I didn't" he nodded and only looked at you for a split second before repeating himself, eyes fixed on his plate. "I know I didn't, you didn't even ask me to, but I wanted you to have that"

"Chan…"

He still wasn't meeting your eyes. "You said you didn't feel safe if everyone around you was drunk, and that's totally understandable, especially since our friend group is mostly guys. And like I know, I know none of them would ever do anything to make you feel uncomfortable or anything, but still… I know you asked your ex not to drink too much when you went out together, but he never listened. I saw he never listened and I saw the look in your eyes, so I don't know… I did the next best-" he stopped to shake his head, "I did what I could"

"Channie" you pleaded, extending your hand across the table for him to take, but he didn't. However, he looked up, met your eyes and continued speaking. 

"Like it's not even that big of a fucking deal

you know? We all have needs, we all deserve someone to listen to us and to care for us, what does he do? Partners are supposed to make each other feel safe and heard and him… fuck him! Fuck him for treating you like that. Fuck him for disrespecting you. Fuck him for making you, you out of all people, a literal angel we're all blessed to have in our lives, look into my eyes and tell me you think you're stupid. Fuck him for getting into your head and making you think all those awful things-"

That was it. You couldn't bear it anymore. You dropped everything you had in your hands and rushed around the table to him, all but tackling him off the chair with the way you threw yourself against him. It was the best way you could come up with to help him calm down, to show him that you were there, and you were ok, and that everything was fine. 

"Hey, Chan, it's ok" you cooed, brushing his hair, "It's ok, can you look at me?"

He did. "I'm sorry I got carried away" he shook his head, "I just… I hate him"

"I know…"

"You deserve someone better. I wish you never met him. And what's worse, what's keeping me up at night, is that I don't even know the full story. What I know is from what I've seen, I don't even want to think-"

"Then don't"

That hit him hard. "God, Y/n.. no.. I'm so sorry, I-"

"It's ok" you smiled and pushed some curly strands of hair off his forehead, "It's all over now, it's all in the past"

"Y/n" Chan shook his head and stood up to face you properly, wrapping his fingers around your wrists. "You know I'm always here, right? Whatever happens, or happened or might happen, I'll always be here for you. You have me, always. Ok?"

"Yeah, mhm" you nodded, teary eyes looking directly into his, "I know"

"You can always come to me, talk to me, anything, ok?"

"Yep"

"Always"

"Always" you nodded again and allowed him to bring you into a hug. 

"And I just wanna say that I know it's just a matter of time until you find someone who will make you happy the way you deserve, but until then, let me be the one to do that"

"Make me happy?" you beamed, looking up at him, "You already make me happy"

"Ok, but like-" Chan chuckled, dimples out and all  "Really happy"

"Really happy? What does that mean?"

"It means we've been so busy with work and life, we haven't hung out as much as we used to. We could start doing that again, and even as just your best friend, I know I can treat you so much better"

You probably should've taken him more seriously, "Like the Shawn Mendes song?"

Chan cringed for a second - not at the song, but at the fact that only now did he realize how cheesy he had been. "Yeah.. like the Shawn Mendes song"

"Can you learn it? And then sing it for me?"

"I, uh… yes, I guess I can"

"No, scratch that, I want a better song. I want a serenade"

"You want me to serenade you?" Chan laughed, most likely thinking you were joking.

"Yes. With a guitar and all!"

"Obviously with a guitar. What kind of a dumbass serenades someone without a guitar?"

"I don't know" you shrugged, "Some people use portable speakers and stuff"

Eyes rolled the back of his head, he pretended to shake off the distaste. "And they say romance is dead"

"But romance isn't dead, so you'll use your guitar"

His tone turned sassy and sarcastic, his hip popping to the side. "Ok, guitar. Noted. Anything else you want? Strawberries dipped in chocolate? Roses?"

"Um.. yes!? To both"

For a second he looked surprised but then jumped back into the game. "I'm writing these down, I'm not kidding" he warned, taking his phone off the table and opening the notes app. 

"Good" you moved closer to look at his screen, "And, urgh, I don't know if I want you to wear a suit and tie or a leather jacket"

"Please don't make me wear a suit," he begged.

"Ok, suit and tie. Write it down"

"Write it down" he mocked you while he did as told. "Anything else?"

"Candles!"

"Ok, candles, noted"

"And bring Berry"

"Ok, Berry.." he typed. While you had a few more ideas as to how to keep this charade going, Chan was on a different page. "I'm aware that this is just a joke, but you know I'd actually love to do all of these for you, right?"

"I know" you confessed, your attitude swiftly changing as you melted under his sweet and caring gaze. "I actually do know you'd do this, and a lot more for me. But you really don't have to, not like this, not just because it's something that I'd like but haven't gotten in the past. Maybe someday, under a different context, but please, don't feel responsible for this right now"

"I don't" he wholeheartedly shook his head. "I don't feel responsible for this, and I'm not gonna do it. But if you do wake up one morning and feel like it, just let me know, ok?"

"Yes, ok" you giggled and wrapped your arms around his waist. "Thank you"

With his arm around your shoulders, he pressed his lips to your forehead. "Anything for you"

-

5 weeks later

The dishes were done, the trash had been taken out, your kitchen was spotless and so was your living room. And while never in your life had you ever allowed any of your guests to help you tidy up after a party, tonight had been different. Chan lingered around after everyone else had left and cheerfully helped you clean up the place, despite the clock having already struck 4. 

A small part of you still felt bad for keeping him around at that hour, but a bigger part of you was happy to still have him around.

You didn't mind being alone, but you wanted him around. That was why once you were finally done making your apartment look decent again, the second Chan dared look in the direction of where his jacket and shoes were, you instantly spoke up. 

"Ah, Channie! You're not that tired, are you?"

"Nuh-uh, no. Not really" he lied through his teeth. His eyes were half closed, his shoulders slumped and even standing up felt like a tedious task. But just like you, he didn't want to leave either. "Why?"

"I-um-" you struggled to come up with something, "Could you maybe take a look at my laptop? It's been acting funny"

Just as bad of a liar as he was. But he found it funny and didn't even hesitate before agreeing. 

He sat on the couch and waited for you to bring your laptop, which you placed on the coffee table in front of him. "What's wrong with it?" he questioned, unable to hide his knowing smile.

"I don't know" you grinned too but in pure amusement with your antics, "It's acting… funny"

"Really? Let's see"

And just so as luck had it, the laptop was working perfectly fine. "How did you do that?" you pretended to gasp. "You fixed it!"

"I did?" he chuckled, "Magic hands, I guess"

"Yeah… probably. But I think you should stay for a bit. What if it stops working again?"

"We wouldn't want that, would we?" he hummed and then you noticed his eyes slip to the clock at the corner of the screen. 4:43am. It snapped you out of it in an instant, what the hell were you doing?

"Actually, I don't think I'm gonna use it tonight anyway. If it starts acting up again tomorrow, I'll call you. You can go, Channie. Thanks anyway"

"Can I stay anyway?" he asked and your heart nearly dropped. "Hang out for a bit?"

"Aren't you tired?"

"I am but.. I don't want to leave"

"Ok" you softly said and then fought to look anywhere but directly into his eyes. "There's some ice tea left, would you like some?"

"Mhm, sure"

Part of you expected him to refuse your offer, but you were glad he didn't. It was what most of you had to drink that night, an ice tea - soju combo you found online that turned out to be even better than expected, and now, the last remaining cups of it were on the coffee table as you settled back on the couch next to Chan. 

He sipped his drink in silence, a telltale sign that something was on his mind. It was obvious he was hesitant. "Just say it" you giggled, "There's something on your mind"

"I was just… I wanted to ask, but I don't know if I should"

You knew what he meant, or at least thought you did. "Ask me"

"We don't have to talk about it if you don't want to"

"You haven't said anything" you reminded him, "I don't know if I want to talk about it or not"

"Y/n…"

"Chan…" you rolled your eyes in the exact same way that he did, which made him playfully nudge your shoulder. 

"Are you ok with me drinking right now?" 

"Yes! Of course! I thought you drank earlier too”

“I did, I did… I just wanted to make sure”

“It’s fine, Chris, don’t worry” you smiled and leaned into his side for a second. “I offered you the drink. And even if I hadn’t, I told you, you don’t have to stay away from alcohol at all times just because of me”

“I know…” he said, his eyes instantly falling down to his hands. “I just don’t know the whole story and I don’t want to do something by mistake and make you feel uncomfortable”

“Channie… stop, no, don’t go there. I don’t want you to feel like walking on eggshells around me. I promise I’ll tell you if there’s ever anything, but you could never make me feel uncomfortable”

“I don’t want to push you if you don’t feel like talking about it but I’ve been dying to ask” he softly said and all you did was blink as a sign for him to continue. “When or like, how did this all start?”

“Um..” you took a deep breath. You knew it would come up, that he’d eventually gather the courage to ask, and you dreaded the fact that you let things get so far before telling him. “It’s not really that big of a deal, I think I make it seem like a way more serious thing than it actually is”

“You can still tell me, you know I always want to listen to you"

“I know” you smiled and met his calm eyes. He was patient, gathered into a ball on the couch, waiting for you to speak. He wasn’t going to pressure you or dismiss your feelings, he looked at you with adoration in his eyes, all the patience in the world, all just for you. “I.. I don’t feel comfortable around drunk people because I feel like they’re unpredictable. And unfiltered, I guess. It’s wrong of me to assume, but I can’t help but fear that everyone is going to act like that when they get drunk. And I’m always afraid that in case they say or do something that bothers me, they won’t listen when I try to talk to them, that they’d keep doing their thing no matter what I say. That was why I wanted my ex boyfriend to stay relatively sober when we went out together, so that I’d have someone to turn to in case I felt overwhelmed. Funny-” you chuckled bitterly, “He was the only one who acted like that whenever there was alcohol around. Everyone else is just more giggly and prone to start dancing out of nowhere”

“I’m very sorry he never listened to you, Y/n”

“That’s ok, it’s all in the past now. I like to think that if I ever find myself in a similar situation again, I’ll at least know to get out faster. I promised myself I’d never allow a person like this in my life, but I did, and that made me feel really bad about myself. So, baby steps, I guess”

“Why did you promise yourself that before?”

You sighed. “It was my dad. He used to drink a lot back when I was younger, always looking to start fights and all that. He’s the reason for a lot of my anxieties, but blaming him is not gonna get me anywhere. I’m just trying to do my own thing”

“And you’re doing a really good job, Y/n” Chan said. 

“You think so?” you giggled, the weight of the topic making you more inclined to show your emotions, no matter how much you’d have liked to keep a strong front.

“I really do” he nodded, “And I love to see it”

“You know it’s thanks to you, right?”

“It’s not thanks to me, Y/n” Chan rolled his eyes and opened his arms for you. “Come here”

After setting your drink down, you crawled closer and cuddled into his chest, your head tucked right under his chin. “It is, because you gave me everything and never expected anything in return. I barely felt comfortable enough to be myself when I was alone, but you made me feel safe enough to realize that maybe there’s nothing wrong with me, that I can accept myself and that maybe other people will accept me too. And at the same time, I realized that I don’t really care what other people see in me or not, because you see me and you like me just the way I am, and that’s a big deal to me.”

When you stopped speaking, you couldn’t see him. You had your cheek pressed against his chest and even though you were able to feel his heart rate quicken, you didn’t think much of it. But when he failed to answer, you quickly turned your head to look at him. His glossy eyes met yours, bottom lip popping out as he struggled to keep himself from letting out more than he considered appropriate.

“I just really, really love you, Channie” you said past the heavy lump that was building in the back of your throat. “And going back to what you asked me earlier, no, you could never make me feel uncomfortable. Not that it matters much, but the last time I saw you drunk, you spent one whole hour reading the truth or dare cards and laughed your heart out by yourself and then you went to sleep. But even so, I think I’m past the point where it’s about what you say or what you do, it’s just… you. I love you” you said again and squeezed him in your hold, arms tightening around his frame until your joints hurt. It made him chuckle and his head fell forward, along with a little, stray tear that landed on your shoulder.

“I love you, Y/n” he tried to whisper, as a pathetic attempt to hide the way his voice trembled. But you heard it, you felt it, and in return, only smiled as you looked up at him.

"You're my person"

"I'll be whatever you want me to be, so then I'll take it, I'll be your person" 

"No, you don't get it" you laughed and cuddled back into the cushions so you could face him as you gathered your knees to your chest. "You are my person. I always considered my roommate to be my best friend, and I always thought my partner should be my half. But it's still always been you, the one person I run to and the one person I always want to talk to. I guess that never sat right with me." as you spoke, your tone got progressively lighter, until a giggle escaped, "I guess I need you out of my life so I can move on"

"Hey!" Chan's face suddenly got serious. He nudged your knee, fixed you with his stare and pointed a finger in your face. "Don't say that"

But you did, you said it, and were ready to say it again. It was a dumb thought, you knew that, but still, you couldn't shake it. It had been in the back of your mind for too long, popping up at the most inopportune moments, but this wasn't one of those. Now you were being honest, getting stuff off of your chest, and if there was a moment to say this out loud, it was now. 

"I'm serious" you leaned your temple against your closed fist and looked down, "I don't want this to sound like a 'reject me so I can move on' type of thing, but I do look for you in other people. And I know I'm not gonna find you there, but I still get disappointed when I don't" 

"But why not me? Why look for me in other people when I'm right here?" 

"Don't say that" you cuddled closer into yourself. "I thought about it, of course I did. And I wanted to make a move, more than once, but we wouldn't work. This isn't right"

While he looked hurt by your words, there was a glimmer of hope in his eyes - in the way he looked at you, as if he was one step away from having it all and was determined to fight for it. "Why do you think that?"

"I already feel like a leech, but it's one thing when you're just my friend. I don't think we'd have a very healthy attachment. You pieced me back together, and I love that - for myself. But it wouldn't be fair to you. You shouldn't have to constantly do that for your partner. At least not when they can't do the same for you"

"Y/n" he said in a serious tone, his eyes fixed on yours. "You can't possibly believe that"

"It's true, though"

"No, it's not. Just because you've been through a difficult time and I've been here for you, doesn't mean you haven't been there for me too!"

"Yeah, but I haven't done anything any of your other friends wouldn't have."

"Well then" he began speaking and struggled to hide his grin. "Why did you do all of those things for me if you knew I had others who could do them?"

"Why?" you frowned. "Why!? Because I wanted to. Because I wanted to be-" but then it hit you. "Oh shut up!" you exclaimed and stood up from the couch, your feet involuntarily leading you towards the kitchen. "I'm not having this conversation with you!"

"Y/n! Come back here!" Chan laughed out loud and jumped to follow you, all a giggle as he caught up with you. He placed his chin on your shoulder and wrapped his arms around you from behind, his chuckles even more uncontrollable now that he had seen the flustered look on your face. "You're my person too!"

"Chan, stop it" you giggled and hid your face behind your palms.

"Who let's me sleep over because they know that if I'm alone I'll spend the entire night working? Who's the first one that gets to hear my songs? Who do I call crying when I miss home? Is it you?" he chuckled, "Is it? The way you come over every single time I tell you I miss my family. Remember that one time you had some work to do, but you still came over and we haven't talked for hours because you were busy, but just the fact that you were there, with me, put me back on my feet? Y/n, look at me"

You shook your head, overwhelmed and completely confused by the hurricane of emotions swirling around your chest. 

"You're my home, you dumb ass" he kissed the side of your head. "It's funny to me that you didn't know"

Itchy on the inside and too fired up to stay still, you wiggled your way out of his hold and turned to face him. "How was I supposed to know?" you threw your arms up in frustration, eyes glossy as you giggled your way through the sentence, "You never told me, you idiot"

"Was it really that effortless for you? To be everything I ever needed?"

"Oh, shut up!" you scoffed, the tears now threatening to spill down your cheeks. Again, you tried to hide from him, but Chan wasn't having it.

"Come here" he hugged you again, "I love you"

"Leave me alone" you cried, face hidden in the crook of his neck. 

It might have looked like he found it amusing, but he too was overwhelmed. His little chuckles were nothing else other than a sign of all the admiration and awe he felt inside when he looked at you, of the warmth around his heart as you clung to his hoodie like your life depended on it. 

But eventually you pulled away. "Ok, I'm done. I love you" you wiped your tears and turned to leave, "But I'm also done with this conversation"

"Hey, hey, hey!" Chan exclaimed, not missing a beat before caging you in between his arms and the counter behind you. "All these years I thought my feelings were one sided, today I find out they aren't, that you feel the same way, but then you tell me you don't want to do anything about it?"

"Basically"

"Y/n!" he laughed in despair, "Come on. Give me one good reason we shouldn't be together. Just one"

"I- I don't have one. I'm just scared"

"Of what?" Chan asked softly, "It's just me. You know me"

"I don't know" you lied. "It's scary. You make it scary"

"I make it scary?" he gasped. 

"What if I fuck up?"

"What if I fuck up?"

You scoffed. "Yeah, right"

"Love, at this point, you're just being delusional. I have no idea what's going on inside that head of yours, but I'd love to find out. Tomorrow. Now it's the buttcrack of morning, I've been dying to kiss you for god knows how long and you're just standing here, spewing nonsense as if you're not the most amazing person I've ever met."

"I'm sorry" you looked down.

Chan tiled your chin back up so you'd look at him, "Don't be sorry, just trust me"

"I trust you" 

"Then, can I kiss you?"

And a little nod was enough. And no matter how nervous you might have been, his hold, like so many times before, drained the worries right out of your mind. And the awkwardness - ever present whenever you kissed someone for the first time, especially someone you cared about, barely managed to make its presence felt. Because at the end of the day, nothing was new. You may have never kissed him before, but the intimacy was familiar. You knew his touch, how he felt, how gentle he was and how much he cared. Only now, you got to experience that through a kiss shared in your kitchen, while the sun was rising, after you opened your heart for him and he still craved you as much as ever. 

And while in a way it felt cathartic - the release of so much pent up emotion, it was still frustrating. You couldn't get as close as you wanted no matter how hard you pressed yourself against him, and you couldn't get enough of his taste despite going at it until dizziness took over. 

It was hard to pull away for air when the kiss itself felt like breathing. 

The sun was already up and at the top of the sky by the time you opened your eyes. You had probably gotten around 5 or 6 hours of sleep when something stirred you awake. 

Excited to wake up for the first time in ages, you didn't care what interrupted your sleep, you just stretched over to the other side of the bed, and frowned when you found it empty. 

But then there it was again, the sound that woke you up. The neighbors, you thought, climbing out of bed. 

The reasonable thing to do was head to the bathroom, fix your hair a little, maybe brush your teeth, but there was something else on your mind and you went to look for it. 

"Chan?" you stopped dead in your tracks in the middle of the hallway, one hand rubbing your squinted eyes. "What are you-"

"Ah, fuck" he looked up at you, like a child caught red-handed. He didn't move, just sat there in his spot on his knees by the door, unable to come up with a way to word an explanation. He hoped you'd understand it yourself.

It took you a second but the details started coming one by one - the suit, the tie, the guitar against the wall. There were rose petals on the floor. And under Chan's arm - the source of the sounds that woke you up - Berry fidgeting and yelping, desperately trying to wiggle his way out Chan's grip and over to you. 

"Chan, what is this?" you scrunched your face at the itchiness in your nose and furiously blinked at the way your eyes suddenly started stinging. 

"You, uh… weren't supposed to wake up yet"

"Chan, what the fuck is this"

Wordlessly, he put Berry down and stood up. 

The dog sprinted at you, tail wagging as his little paws clawed at your legs. All you could do was pick him up and squeeze him to your chest, sinking your nose in his soft fur as a way to ignore everything else. 

"You don't like it," Chan simply said. It probably should have been a question, but the insecurity inside his chest made it sound like a statement. Fuck. Fuck, fuck, fuck. 

"Don't like it?" you mumbled, walking towards him as Berry still worked on greeting you with some well deserved and hungry licks all over your chin, cheek and jaw. "Chan, I-"

"I also got candles," he pointed to the kitchen table, "And strawberries. And there's chocolate too"

You walked over and spotted the bowl, full of chocolate dipping cream, covered with a plastic wrap. "Did you make this!?"

"No, no… I would've- I really wanted to, but there wasn't time. I asked Felix"

"You asked Felix?"

He responded with a shameful nod but then jumped to clarify. "I didn't tell him what I needed it for, I- I said it was just for fruit in general. I didn't want to tell anyone anything until I talked to you first, especially because I was a little bit pushy last night, so if you want me to leave, I'll leave-"

"Leave!? Pushy? No, you weren't pushy, stop it"

He breathed out relieved. "Ok, good, because I could barely sleep last night, I- I felt like I forced you to kiss me and I felt so bad, but you were already asleep and I didn't know-"

"Oh my god, no" you shook your head and launched yourself at him, a tight hug with Berry squeezed in the middle. "You didn't pressure me to do anything, relax"

And while the embrace felt good and homey for you, Chan didn't mirror your emtions. He was still on edge, only half of his grand plan having played out yet. "There's still the song, I promised I'd serenade you"

"You learned a song for me" you melted, "What song?"

"You haven't heard it before"

"I haven't?"

"No, because I wrote it. It's about you. For you. I wrote it when you first joked about all of this, I wrote it all that night, and I've been dying to play it for you ever since then, but now I'm so nervous, I think-" he tugged at the collar of his shirt, "I think I'll combust"

While in awe with everything happening, you weren't quite happy. "But I don't like this, Chan. You put so much effort into this and I haven't even washed my face. Can you give me a second? So I don't look like-" you gestured up and down your body, "this"

"You know… I feel like I've been so cheesy and over the top this morning, that I don't think one more cliche is going to make that big of a difference."

As you switched Berry from one side to the other due to your arms growing tired, you raised one eyebrow in confusion.

With nothing but admiration in his eyes, Chan smiled, "You have never looked more beautiful to me"

Thank you for reading!! I hope you enjoyed it!!! 🥺 feedback makes my day so I'd love to hear what you thought!!! ❤️❤️

[kitpanthera]

last one for now!! thank you so so much for answering my questions, this has been so fun. (also, my phone randomly started updating in the middle of me typing this out so if, for some reason, you have an unfinished version of this in your inbox, my bad.)

chapters 26-27 🎉

1. dipper thinking about mabel using the memory gun on him to make him forget bill,,, hm. even if they DID do that, that might honestly make things worse? like, dipper would then be bound to deals that he no longer remembers making or what the terms of them are. i also don't know if a child's mind would recover as well to use of the memory gun.

2. dipper feeling like bill is the only one who doesn't have an idealized version of him is his head... i'm not sure i agree! bill's placed him on a very high pedestal with a very high fall should he get knocked off it... and dipper saying that bill encouraged him to be himself and TAUGHT him how to do that because he's never been able to do that before,,, i'm chewing on glass rn.

3. the entire phone call section,,, stan immediately saying he would keep the twins with him and their parents wanting split custody (a fake out to get the other to back down? did they spend the whole time arguing over who got mabel? neither of them wanting to take dipper...). "they can come up here and tell them themselves" yes please! dipper had his moment with mabel, now he deserves to yell at his parents (as a treat). "hey guys! thanks for coming all the way here 💞💞💞 loved seeing you but i can't wait to never see you again! you don't need to miss my choir recitals anymore because my choir no longer exists! you can go back to just being mabel's parents while i go rule with world with my best friend, the interdimensional demon who's bringing about a new age on earth, you might know him. see you never!"

4. it's such a small thing but ford bending down to talk to dipper so they're on the same page!! he cares so much about these kids and he just met them 😭 him taking the time to reassure dipper that they're family and that he seems himself in dipper!!! him smiling when dipper agrees with stan that he's like ford (though not in the way he expects). that must've been another painful moment for stan!

5. does mabel realize how big of a deal it is that dipper can speak to bill during the day/without being asleep?

6. dipper not seeinging weirdmageddon as the apocalypse because the apocalypse has negative connotation!! weirdmageddon is GOOD to him so it's the bringing about of a new age!

7. dipper's mental form changing to look more like bill's human form instead of pre-gravity falls dipper,,, after he has recognizes how much he's changed,,, right after being compared to ford,,,

8. ford must feel so stupid for showing dipper the rift! i'm assuming dipper didn't just smack the rift out of his hands because bill wants ford on his side willingly? not sure you're going to get that, bill...

9. dipper still caring about stan enough to remind gideon of their deal! and being upset when bud threatens stan! the ghost of dipper-past is haunting dipper's mental house (it's empathy and compassion for people other than bill).

10. dipper letting bill takeover the reins because he's so drained from being involved with the pines,,, him still hoping that someone it's not him and no one noticing,,, NO ONE NOTICING (i'm ripping my hair out)

11. dipper watching the billford reunion,,, guys stop being messy, toxic exs in front of a 12 yo!

12. dipper hiding in the grass/wheat... is the distinction important? both represent different things (wheat as salvation and resurrection while grass can be protection and concealment...). are they a mental representation of the ways ford has tried to protect himself or move on from bill?

13. an eternal night!! stars staying the same even during weirdmageddon!! everyone always being able to see the stars!! is that almost like,, a gift? since they both value the stars so much, and bill wanted to bring the stars to his people, is that almost more of a "benevolent overlord" thing from bill? or really just gifts to themselves?

14. how different that conversation would've gone if dipper hadn't mentioned ford!

15. mabel realizing that he's just been around because he's manipulating ford while ford didn't notice,,, is he that desperate for human connection that he doesn't notice dipper manipulating him? or is dipper just that good at acting?

16. dipper telling mabel it's deals PLURAL. i wonder if she had realized that before, if that's a big thing for her, or if she didn't even notice.

17. "he takes my feelings seriously, unlike you," and "you've only ever dismissed me, mabel" but him still missing her and wanting to be close to her,,, him saying that he doesn't want to only be close with bill but she's giving him no choice,,, i am staring into the sun.

18. dipper comparing mabel to their mom! is that because he sees both of them as "checking out" of their relationship with him? and then mabel immediately saying she doesn't want to think about home and that they don't even know what they're going home to 😭 gravity falls feeling more like home than piedmont has in years 😭😭😭

19. i'm assuming bill saying "pine tree" was him trying to warn him that bill was in earshot? i'm kind of surprised that bill didn't take over during the fight to try to separate them before they could reveal dipper and bill's friendship to ford.

20. did ford hear dipper ask bill to take over and that he didn't want to be there?

21. "i know it's me you want!" well...

22. does anyone hear ford shouting at dipper? that would probably be hard to explain to the tourists lol

24. mabel always being the one to start weirdmageddon... fate again? or maybe something more like a fixed point or "canon event" like in spider verse?

25. did dipper stop wearing his bill jewelry once ford showed up? he mentions starting to wear it consistently, but not that he's stopped.

26. physical effects of using magic showing up soon,,, roadside attraction being the next episode,,, dipper being changed SO significantly,,, can he even pass through the barrier anymore? i'm imagining him in the rv and just SLAMMING into the barrier at 60 mph not going well. but it would reveal that as a problem to bill before weirdmageddon begins...

27. dipper learning to take pain rather than bill flipping the switch,,, is that because bill wants to it be authentic or because he knows flipping that switch would be too noticeable?

thank you thank you thank you sm!!! again, i'm sure i'll be back with more, but that's just from my first read through in a while!

Oh yeah I've been spending all my spare time replying?? Truly I could yap about my own series for days, this has legitimately been so so enjoyable for me!!

1. Yeahhhh, it would not go well, especially with how much more impressionable young minds are. Dipper would have no clue who Bill was, but still have a pact bond with him, still have him able to possess him whenever he wanted... A dark AU to consider.

2. Dipper is sort of aware of this pedestal? But he's determined that he set himself there, not Bill. He has intentionally set himself up to be that way for Bill because of his whole "I can fix him" mentality. He wants Bill to think he can fix him, too (and he kinda does?). But who he is on that pedestal, as far as he's concerned, is still himself.

3. The nature of the custody argument is yet to be revealed... But hooooo boy, can't wait to write that one! We stan Stan as a parent stand in for these kids; he's not perfect but he's better for these kids than their parents are!

4. For as much crap as Ford gets from the fandom, I love my boy! He really does care so much about them. They're just kids, they're twins, and to him, they start as a wholesome reminder of himself and Stan when they were that age. He's protective and caring! He also bends down to their level to talk to them multiple times in canon, and I love that for him! He also is someone I love to whump, so be prepared. :)

5. Not really? She knows his whole relationship with Bill and the way it's escalating is dangerous, but she's not aware of how all Bill works, exactly, so she doesn't know how significant that is.

6. Yes!! They're basically ringing in the New World Order (fitting to use an Illuminati term, no?)

7. :)

8. Pretty much, yeah. Bill still wants to be able to convince Ford to join him, and is hoping by cultivating a bond of trust between him and Dipper, he'll still be able to do that.

9. Yes! Dipper gets the chance to defend his family and show off how powerful he is, so he'll take it! Best of both worlds, really.

10. :)

11. They will ✨ not ✨

12. It is wheat! I'm impressed you picked up on that specific symbolism in it; in canon, it's wheat, but the symbolism is more in Dipper's perception that he's pretty sure it's wheat. Bill helped him be reborn, after all. :)

13. Sort of a gift to themselves. More on this to come. :)

14. One can only wonder...

15. Dipper is quite a good actor and it helps that he actually does like Ford. Mabel is definitely a bit smarter than Dipper gives her credit for, though, and more observant.

16. She won't notice until later. :)

17. :)

18. Yes! And his mom has always been emotionally manipulative,, as well, playing the victim and guilting Dipper into doing things for her. Dipper feels he's received the same from Mabel, though admittedly not maliciously. But yeah, Mabel doesn't even know about the divorce :)

19. Bill found it more important in the moment to preserve the idea that Mabel has no idea Dipper is being possessed, because he thought switching in the middle of the heated conversation might tip her off, and she might say something. Ford is a bit easier to deal with, and Bill doesn't need him, he just wants him. (But yes, it was a warning.)

20. Yes!

21. :)

22. Who's to say? :)

23. We'll see how things play out! Coming soon...

24. Oh, he did! But he'll be wearing it again now that the cat's out of the bag.

25. :)

26. A bit of both?? Switching a flip completely would be too noticeable and would have some negative side effects. He also wants Dipper to mirror him, and he learned naturally, himself.

no problem!! Thank you so much, really, this is sincerely so much fun!!!!

[quillsink]

hey bestie im feeling a bit sad coz i did a test about being a people pleaser and it said i had a high score and i don't know it just kind of hurt me a bit. i want to be strong and assertive but im always scared about hurting people or losing people. i mean if people are reading this they're gonna get pissed off because this is ridiculous but an example of this is my ex lied to me about liking someone else and i was very angry but i basically forgave her after a week and carried on being friends..... dw not talking to her anymore but YES ITS BAD.

im not really sure why im coming to you but maybe you have some wise words for me.

i just feel like i don't how to stop being like this and i don't want to become a cruel or mean or rude person because im not and i like to pride myself on being quite a kind and thoughtful person because ig that's how i was raised but i want to be strong and stand up for myself and be assertive and not care what other people think but omg i care so much. its probably my libra moon if you believe that stuff

ugh idk and i feel like i get so nervous about sharing stuff that i like with people that i can be closed off and hard to know and it's because i find it hard to be myself ig because im scared of being judged.

HI oh my god im so sorry grace bestie i completely forgot to respond to this!!!!

honestly i think one of your best traits is how incredibly kind and compassionate you are. and yes that can be a negative sometimes if it leads to being a people pleaser but dude, you’re one of the kindest fuckin people i know. it’s what makes you grace and i just, i don’t know, a lot of time i was feeling down your relentless kindness always, always cheered me up.

i think for a lot of people, people pleasing ties in to self esteem, so if you want to stop being a people pleaser you gotta work on yoursrlf. i think one thing you gotta think about is WHY are you afraid of not pleasing people? and then get to the root of that

you have to remind yourself that you deserve to be treated well and with respect and you are loved. the right people will not leave you for setting boundaries. if someone is mad at you for setting boundaries fuck em.

like ok i’ll give u an example one time a friend put their hand around my waist and i didn’t like it (for numerous reasons) and i said i felt uncomfortable and could she not do it. she apologised and moved her hand to my shoulders and we continued talking!

a good friend will be happy that you set boundaries because you’re telling them how to love you and interact with you in the way that makes you feel comfortable

you becoming cruel is honestly highly unlikely. grace you are one of the kindest people i know and i don’t think that’ll ever change because it’s who you are

the right people will love you and respect you and not judge you. and the way you can let that happen is by loving, respecting and not judging yoursrlf

love you dude

[mountswhore]

Could u write one for Mason please? :) maybe after a shitty relationship he doesn’t trust girls anymore, not even y/n who he’s been on a couple of dates with. He trusts her, but not fully. Still afraid she might use him and run off as the last one has. At a party or sth someone talks shit about him and he defends him although he isn’t there. Ben records is secretly cause he’s a big fan of Mason and y/n together and wants him to know that he can fully trust her. I hope this makes sense! xx

𝐮𝐧𝐝𝐞𝐧𝐢𝐚𝐛𝐥𝐲 𝐲𝐨𝐮𝐫𝐬 — mason mount

summary: mason has no trust in girls since his ex, he never takes anything to the next level because of it. which makes his crush on you painful.

notes: requests are OPEN + i decided to change the end a bit, this is short, sorry <3

"Hey," you greeted, smiling into your phone although the man on the other end couldn't see you, "are you busy?"

Mason smiled at the sound of your voice, his heart picked up it's pace too. It usually did when he heard your voice, or saw you. The two of you had been walking the very thin line between friendship and relationship for a long time. Mason was well aware of your, somewhat, feelings for him. And you were aware of his feelings for you, but you knew he was holding off on moving it forward.

You'd been friends with Mason throughout his last relationship, which had essentially ruined his trust in women. After her, he stopped talking to you for a while, thinking you were only friends with him because of the buzz surrounding his name, but you'd quickly told him that wasn't the case. Some of his other mates would get him to go out, and when he did, he would stick with them rather than talk to girls.

You had been on a couple of dates over the past six months, when you had told him you liked him and he admitted he felt the same. And despite this 'situationship' not moving, you didn't dare to push Mason. You knew what he went through before, you knew he still had trust issues, and decided to let him go at his own pace.

"No, I'm free for the rest of the day. What's up?" He asked, sitting up from his spot on the couch.

"I was going to ask if you wanted to go for a little lunch date," you suggested. Mason could hear you were already out and about and felt bad if he were to decline. "I just left work early, as I only went in for a meeting, and I saw your favourite pub is serving roasts for lunch."

"I'm sold. I will meet you there in twenty minutes."

Mason had made an effort with his appearance, as he liked you. He wanted to put as much work in as you were, even though he was hesitant to make anything exclusive with you. He knew he liked you, he knew he, eventually, wanted something out of this. He saw you in a long-term way, and it definitely helped that you were already friends.

"You look gorgeous," he spoke, finally embracing you as he found you at a small table by the window. You blushed, sitting down opposite him and sipping at the wine you ordered.

"I bought you a beer, thought you might be a bit thirsty."

"You know me too well." He smiled.

The two of you enjoyed your roast, talking about anything that came to mind, and you were enjoying your time with Mason as you always did. And you'd remembered what Ben had texted you this morning, about a party and asking you to convince Mason to go, as he liked you so much.

"So," you sighed, having ordered your second wine and sitting back in your chair, "why aren't you going tonight?"

Mason knew exactly what you were talking about. The party. Everyone had been banging on about it, and Mason left himself out of it. It would be a few hours of loud music, girls being far too touchy, and a constant reminder of why he had trust issues. But you would be there, that should be a reason in itself. If he had you, who cared about the loud music, clingy girls, and memories of exes?

"I just don't think I can do a party right now," Mason reasoned, flashing you the same smile you were giving him, an innocent, yet up-to-something grin. "We have like ten parties every week, I'm sure I can miss out on one."

"But you can't Mase," you whined, reaching over the table and taking his hand into yours, "come on, for me? Will you put up with the party for at least an hour, for me?"

"You drive a hard bargain," Mason joked, squeezing your hand and giggling, "but fine, I will put up with this party for one hour. After sixty minutes, if I'm not having fun, I'm gone." You nodded, squealing quietly and keeping his hand intertwined with yours.

Mason would rather be with you at his home, competing on whatever stupid game you impulse bought that week, instead of here. At a house party, acting like a bunch of American teenagers. Mason stayed with you from the moment you had arrived, finally finding comfort in someone within this house.

"How long have you been here?" You asked, walking with Mason towards the drinks table in the kitchen.

"Ten minutes, only fifty minutes left until I'm back in an Uber." Mason commented, holding his, now empty, cup still as you poured some liquor into it. "You know, you're more than welcome to join me back home. We can watch whatever bullshit you like."

"Sounds inviting. But I have a life, Mount."

Twenty more minutes had passed, and Mason was pretty much watching you talk to people. You sat on his lap with your arm around him and he kept a hand on your waist, making sure you didn't fall. You weren't complaining about the amount of affection he was showing, it was something, at least. And you felt one step closer.

The party was going well, for you, anyway, and that had come to an end when some guy had come up to you and Mason to greet himself.

"Hey, I'm Dan. I'm the homeowner, and good friends with Cal. How do you know him?" He greeted, and you could tell he was hammered. What man spoke so eloquently whilst sober?

"Hey, I'm Y/N, and this is Mason, as you know." You shouted over the music, leaning forward to the mans ear, and you felt Mason's grip on you tighten. "Me and Cal went to Uni together, and I introduced him to my football friends not too long ago."

"Oh, he mentioned you. Said you were the pretty girl he went to Uni with," Dan responded, and took another sip of his drink. "Me and him have been friends since primary school, we went to different Universities. I went to Cambridge."

"Very smart." You hummed, wanting him to walk off. You wanted to make sure Mason was having fun so he didn't have to leave in 27 minutes.

"You know," he slurred, leaning forward so you could hear him, and Mason could too, "the way Cal spoke about you, I thought you'd end up with him. Not this pretty boy. Cal is working to become a lawyer, and you want a boy who plays with balls for a living? Girls, man."

"Excuse me?" You asked, grimacing at the man opposite you. Mason held you tight, practically telling you with his hands to stop.

"Can't hear me? I'm saying you shouldn't be dating losers who earn half a million for putting a ball in a net." Dan repeated, and you stood up.

"And what do you do? Inhale the money from your parent's bank account because you went to a posh Uni? I don't choose a partner based on their job, or their money, or the Uni they went to. Mason is ten times the man you are, regardless of money." You shouted, and Dan rolled his eyes at you, as if you were a bratty six-year-old.

"Are you-"

Mason held the side of your face, pulling your face closer to his to kiss you. He'd let go of a part of him. The part that was doubting you and every girl he'd met after his ex, the part of him that was screaming about you using him. It was all gone. You were undeniably his, and he was undeniably yours.

"I still have," Mason looked down at his watch, "24 minutes, and I'd very much like it if you left with me."

[kidney9-9]

Please Pick Up [Peter Parker]

Hi y'all hope you enjoy reading :) This is a collaboration with @evermoreparker please make sure to go check out her blog! She has amazing stories! This oneshot is inspired by the song, Baby Me Atende!

Peter Parker x Reader [Angst with happy ending] Warnings: Swear words, rude friends, mentions of alcohol/being drunk, and crying Word Count: 3.7k

-

He felt sick to his stomach when he heard one of his friends mentioning that you were coming by with some guy who was tutoring you. He didn’t need to hear anything about that because it would only lead to him thinking that you were completely fine and over him already. He gave out a laugh, shrugging to his friends, “I don’t really care about that anymore. But I got to go to the bathroom – hold on, I’ll be back.” His voice was slurred from all the drinking, and he excused himself with a nod.

As Peter closes the bathroom door, he breaks down, supporting his body against it and letting everything out.

“FUCK,” he yelled, hoping that his friends didn't listen to his muffled cries. He never wanted it to end but listening to his shitty friends that said he shouldn't be that whipped about you, led him to the deepest regret of his entire life.

His throat felt scratchy after yelling, and he was glad that there was music blasting outside the bathroom so no one could hear him. After getting up for a moment, he gazed into the mirror, not knowing what he could do after messing up so bad with you. His eyes were red, and his face was puffy, and he turned away from his reflection swallowing down a few cries. He tugged his phone out of his pocket, breathing in deeply as he ressed on his contact list, scrolling till he reached your name.

''Please, please pick up.'' he muttered to himself, begging to whatever god there was that you'd talk to him and not ignore him because you were busy with someone else. God, just the thought of you touching another guy the same way you touched Peter makes his blood boils with jealousy.

Unfortunately, it went to the voicemail, “Hi, this is Y/n and if I didn't answer to your call, it's because I'm busy, or maybe I just don't wanna talk to you.”

He laughed, remembering the day you recorded that, you were both drunk and in need of a funny voicemail. God, he missed your voice so much. “Hey, um Idk how to ask this without sounding possessive, but are you seeing someone already? Don't get me wrong, you have every right, but I really wish you weren't.” he mutters the last part to himself.

He sniffled hearing the beep again, and he hung up the phone before setting it down on the counter. He wiped his face, trying to get rid of the tears that continued to flow down, and he laughed to himself, “What the fuck am I doing?” He mumbled, shaking his head.

He knew it should have felt embarrassing and humiliating, calling an ex, but right now, he didn’t care. All he felt was pain and he needed to hear your voice. He pressed call again, setting it on speaker this time as he waited for you to pick up this time.

He found himself losing hope each ring, and before he knew it the voicemail started to play again. He leaned back against the wall, staring at the phone, relishing in your voice over the message. Once it beeped, he started to talk again.

“Please, I need to know if you are. I want to know if you’re already over what happened between us. I’m so fucking sorry; I just need to know now. I can’t,” He cut himself off, biting down on his sleeve to hold in a sob.

He tried to recompose himself by taking a deep breath. “Just, please, call me if you hear this, I miss you so much and everything, somehow, reminds me of you. It's like universe is having a blast seeing how miserable I am without you to tell me everything is going to be fine, without our stupid inside jokes that always brought joy to my heart, and I can't stop thinking about the last time we kissed, If I knew it then I'd have spent days just with my lips against yours.” He stopped, once again, trying to hold on a sob, but not being able to this time.

“I'm so fucking stupid.” He covers his face, too ashamed to look at his own reflection, and tries to wipe his tears. “Fuck, I love you so much, I never had the chance to say it out loud because I was scared of what reaction you'd have, but fuck it, what else do I have to lose huh?” He laughed at his self-deprecating joke.

The message ended but Peter found himself needing to tell you more. He already pressed the call button again before he could stop and think about it.

Again, you didn’t answer, so Peter listened to the voicemail. Once it ended, he started to speak again, hovering over the phone now. “I still love you. Even after everything, and after hearing that you’re seeing someone new now, it hurts. So please, you have to answer my calls or leave me a message. I don’t know what to do anymore without you around.” This time he ended the message early, pressing his hands against his face.

“I love you. I can’t stop loving you even now.” He whispered, staring down at the phone screen. Your contact picture was what he was focusing on, and he couldn’t pull his eyes away.

He found himself remembering the sweet memories you two created together, and then he started to remember when everything started to go wrong. He sucked in a heavy breath, now looking away from his phone, towards the door instead.

Suddenly, Peter heard a soft knock on the door, it was one of his friends.

“Hey man, everything ok in there?” His friend called out.

Oh shit.

“Yea, just feeling kind of sick.” Peter quickly responded; well, that wasn't a total lie. “It's better if I stay here.” He explained and apparently, his friend bought it.

“Alright, let me know if you need help.” Peter waited for him to leave, so he could start another voicemail.

“So... you’re not going to pick up, ok I get that. I just feel so lost without you around, I liked me better when you were telling me all about your favorite artists, books, anything, I was genuinely interested because of the way you had that little sparkle in your eyes when you got all excited about something. Just please don't forget us so soon.” His voice was raw from all of the emotions mixing in his head.

“I remember how you said that when we move in together, you'd be so pissed off with all my socks on the floor, and I'd like that more than anything right now, any type of attention I get from you now would be the greatest thing ever. But I get it, I screwed up too bad.” He went back to his crying after remembering how broken you looked when he said it was over.

“And now I want to know what it’s like to move in with you; to take a bigger step. I shouldn’t have backed out like that. I was nervous and scared. I thought if I let myself fall even more in love with you, then somehow, we both would end up hurt. I thought it was best if I broke up with you then because I was scared where we would end up if we continued,” He paused, a little forced chuckle came out. His appearance was horrible now, and he glanced away, moving a hand through his hair.

“But I know now it was a mistake. It was a fucking horrible mistake because I lost the best part of my life, which was you. I keep having these dreams – where we’re together again, and that we moved into that crappy apartment you said you liked, cause of that garden. And that we were putting up all our pictures, and you said something to me.” Again, he stopped, coughing a bit this time from the crying.

“The thing you told me was that you were happy we were together, and that you loved me. I know it was just a dream, but I want it to be real. Please, pick up. I just need to talk to you, I’m sorry.” Peter finished, now not caring how many tears fell down his face as he stared at the phone.

“Everyone thinks I'm so over you, but you have me in the palm of your hands, I'm whipped as fuck, and how could I not be? You're the sweetest, kindest, and you are nice to me even on your worst days, I know that's the basic, but you are everything I have ever dreamed of since I was a 15-year-old boy daydreaming about his dream girl. Fuck, I can't believe I treated you so bad, you deserve all the love in this world. Is it selfish of me to think that I should be the one giving you that? Yeah, it is, but it's true. We deserved more than this shit, I wish I hadn't lost contact with my high school friends, they would have loved you and not made me treat you like shit, I'm responsible for that, but the guilt is eating me alive and if I could go back to that night, I would. I would take it all back. I told you I didn't feel the same way anymore, God, how the fuck could I be such an asshole, I ruined the best thing that happened to me because of a bunch of fucked up guys. I miss you so, so much, you mean everything to me.” After that, Peter put his phone down, until he heard your personal ringtone.

Fuck, no way that was real. He answered the call as soon as possible and almost felt like he would pass out with how much happiness he felt when he heard your sweet voice, “Hey, you said you wanted to talk.”

He slowly put his phone to his ear, pressing it tightly against his ear, wanting to hear your voice as much as he could. “Hey, oh fuck. You actually – you answered!” He breathed out a sigh of surprise. He rubbed his eyes, tears slowly drying up. He started to get sober too, and he wanted to punch himself for drinking so much.

“I did but what’s going on? Are you alright?” You spoke back softly, and Peter nodded, even though you couldn’t see him. Since you called him back, he felt like everything was good again, but he knew it wasn’t. He knew he had to tell you the whole truth now.

“I screwed up, babe. Really bad.” His voice cracked slightly, and he held in his breath to see what you would say back.

“Peter… where are you? I just got to the party. Let’s talk in person.” You responded, worry pouring into your voice.

Peter gets up as fast as he can, considering his current state, but deeply regrets it when he feels the whole room spinning. “I'm in the bathroom right next to the kitchen.”

Fuck, he really wished you wouldn't see him in this kind of state. What's he going to do about his puffy eyes? Quickly, thinking that it would look better if he tried to wash his face, he turns on the faucet and threw water onto his face.

Right after he did, he heard a knock on the door, and when he opened, it he felt like he couldn't have been happier. There you were, with a worried look on your face - oh shit the voicemails.

Before he could start to explain himself, you were already talking, “Were you swimming in there?” He chuckled, God, how much he missed your sense of humor.

“Something like that.” He mumbled back, trying to wipe off the water on his face. You gave him a kind smile, one that he missed.

You stayed quiet as you handed him a towel that was on the counter. He thanked you softly as he tried to think about what to say to you, but words already started to pour out of his mouth.

“I’m so sorry. The voicemails – you don’t have to listen to them. It’s probably best that you delete them actually! Yeah, it’s just a waste of time, um, I can explain what I said.” He stopped for a moment, glancing at your face to try to guess what you were thinking.

As your smile turned more into a frown, he froze. “I already listened to the on the way here. We should talk about it.” You responded, nodding to him as he hid his face into the towel.

It was embarrassing, he didn’t know what to say except for, “I’m so sorry.” And you just shrugged, not wanting to push either of your boundaries.

“Can you tell me why you thought it would be bad if we moved in together? I don’t even know what I should be thinking; you broke up with me and now you said you loved me over those voicemails.” Your voice almost felt distanced from him, even though you were so close.

He pulled the towel away from his face, shaking his head. “I was so stupid. I still am stupid; I should have realized that was wrong of me to do. I was just scared.”

''So why did you do it? I was also scared as fuck, but I didn't care about what others would say or think of me, because I had you. That was all that mattered. Just for me, apparently.'' You muttered the last part; it was all too much to deal with at the moment.

Peter felt like his heart was stuck on a loop of getting shattered over, and over, and again. He knew that you were hurt, but he had no idea you were scared as well. He always thought you seemed so well put together. “I'm sorry babe, please forgive me. I was so selfish and careless, I should have done better, and I promise you, I will, not just for you, but because I don't like the person I am when I'm hanging out with them as well. Even if you already moved on, I promise to be a better person.” His heart ached with the thought of you being with someone else, but you did deserved being happy, even if it wasn't with him.

You furrowed your brows as your stare locked on him even more. You didn’t know how to feel to what he said, except for anger. You felt your mind cloud up with thoughts of why he did that. “You know what? I want to know why you let others make that decision for you. Was it really just because you were scared? Or was it something else? I’m not going to let your friends talk you out of this one. I want to hear what you really think now. Just you. I don’t want to hear you mention those stupid assholes again.” Your voice remained calm, but your heart started beating faster.

Peter felt his stomach drop, “I don’t know why I let them encourage me,” You cut him off with a loud scoff, and you shook your head.

“I was scared too. I told my friends, and you know what they said? It was probably the same thing your friends told you. But I didn’t let that bother me because I love – no wait, I loved you. I don’t know if I can love someone who bases their decisions off of others that don’t even care for their wellbeing.” You interrupted him.

Peter felt sick to his stomach. How ironic, you said the words he had been dying to hear but corrected it to the past tense. “Please don't say loved. I didn't fully base my decisions on them, but it wasn't great hearing them telling me how it would be over soon.” He let out a fake laugh.

“Fuck, I got so scared of us falling out of love that I decided it would be better if I ended it.” He ran his fingers through his hair, wishing they were yours instead. “I'm sorry, I really am. Just talk to me, please.” He got closer to you, but he stopped, worried that he would invade your personal space and make you uncomfortable.

You eyed him warily, but soon dropped your coldness. “What am I supposed to say?” You mumbled to him as he got closer.

Now as he came closer to you, you noticed the bags under his eyes, how his cheeks seemed hollowed out. You wanted to reach out to him, but you kept your arms to your sides.

“Anything, please.” He replied, closing his eyes for a moment. He wanted to relish being so close to you again, but it was different this time. The connection between the two of you was faint, barely there, and Peter still felt that nagging fear in the back of his mind.

“I don’t want to lose you.” He whispered, mostly to himself now.

“You already did, Peter. That’s the thing...” Your voice wavered, drifting of as you watched as a tear drifted down his face. You couldn’t stop yourself as you reached out and brushed your thumb against it.

“The thing? No, no, wait. It can’t be. Come on, please. We can start over again – this time we can tell each other everything.” Peter stumbled out, shaking his head. He wanted to deny what you just said that he lost you. But he knew it was true.

“Peter, you know it's not that easy.” You hesitantly touched his face, before continuing, “I know, but we are both dedicated on whatever we do, we can try. It's cool if you wanna be just friends...”

No, it wasn't, he wanted to tell you how much pain he was in.

“Please, don't shut me out.” He held your hand close to his heart, showing how every beat was just for you.

“We could never be friends, you know that.” He whispered. You let out a chuckle, shaking your head at him, remembering how quick you two went from being strangers to lovers. Maybe that's where it all went wrong.

“Yeah, I agree. But babe, we deserve another try, our love deserves it. You're everything. Those last few weeks had been hell, I don't wanna be apart from you ever again. Please, give us another try.” He pleaded you, hoping you’d stay.

You stayed quiet for a while, but the longer you thought about it, the longer you started to feel like you should try once more with him. “Only if we go slow, like super slow, starting completely over.” You spoke up, your hand now not leaving his face.

Peter smiled instantly, he broke off into happy laughter, making you smile. “Like completely over? We just met type thing?” He responded, his tone was bright and hopeful.

You nodded back to him, “Yeah, just like that.” And he slowly stepped away from you with a cheesy smile.

He looked into the mirror, and then turned the faucet on. Then he glanced in the mirror, over to you.

“Oh! Hello, didn’t know someone was using this bathroom.” His voice was a bit raw from crying earlier, but now he tried his best to show how happy he was.

He couldn’t even stop himself from smiling like crazy. You let out a few laughs, shaking your head at him in disbelief, but you played along.

“Hey, yeah. I was just about to step out.” You responded, a playful grin on your face.

Peter laughed again; his cheeks full of color as he spun around to face you. “Before you go, what’s your name? You’re so beautiful, so you must have a beautiful name to go along with it.” His compliment was completely tacky, but you loved it.

“My name’s Y/n, what’s yours?” You mumbled, as Peter walked a little closer to you once again. He stuck his hand out, not caring that he didn’t dry it off.

“I’m Peter. It’s nice to meet you.” He responded, and you took his hand in yours and squeezed tightly.

Peter didn’t let go of your hand as the two of you exited the bathroom. He couldn’t take his eyes off you as he felt like the luckiest guy in the world. He was going to do his best and tell you everything he felt now instead of keeping it bottled up and becoming scared.

He didn’t even see his friends standing outside the bathroom door, as if they were waiting for them. You squeezed his hand harder and then he noticed their laughter.

“So what? You guys are back together again? I thought you said you didn’t care about her.” One of his friends teased him, laughing hard as Peter glanced over to you, worried. But it seemed that you knew that it was a lie, since you smiled back to him.

“Was your name Devin? Or Calvin or something?” You asked, raising your eyebrows up to the guy. He shook his head back to you.

“No, it’s Timothy,” You cut him off from continuing, with a loud laugh, “Well fuck you. And fuck you, and you over there, definitely fuck you.” You cursed at them, with a big smile on your face.

Peter chuckled as you continued to swear at everyone. “And you, I have something special to tell you.” You laughed even more, continuing with, “I hope you know you’re a fucking asshole.”

The two of you left as Peter’s friends groaned, not bothering to say anything back to you. Peter was glad that you both were able to leave without there being too much of a problem. But he knew he had to get rid of those friends, and maybe find new ones or try to get in touch with his friends from high school again.

And more importantly, talk to you more about his feelings.

“You know what?” He asked you as he started to swing your hand back and forth in his. You glanced over to him to continue.

“Let’s go get ice cream, near that bus stop.” He expressed in a calm voice, and you instantly stopped walking, causing him to trip a little.

“You remember that?” You spoke in a small voice, almost in disbelief. The way you were staring at him now made his stomach erupt with butterflies as he chuckled quietly.

“Of course, I do. It was our first unofficial date. I even kept the receipt from it.” He laughed, watching as your mouth opened in shock.

[bonnymori]

𝐌𝐚𝐤𝐞 𝐦𝐞 𝐜𝐨𝐦𝐩𝐚𝐧𝐲

Word count: 2760+ (i'll try to keep bigger lengths such as this one!)

Synopsis: You meet a new classmate who's working along Nanami, you think he's fun to be around, it stands the same to him about you. Later, feelings unravel.

Contents/Warnings: (1) Itadori Yuuji x gn!reader (2) FLUFF, TONS OF FLUFF - and some comfort (3) With the small participation of... Ino Takuma!! I really like him too, that's why <33333 (4) This is pretty platonic, but also not? (5) Ending turned sorta cliché... but I liked it u.u

A/N: This boy made me run rampant... to fhe point it's not single attraction anymore I just wish him happiness (smh if only my parents knew...) also next post will be Toji's fic pt. 2! Y'all see the first part is almost reaching 100 kudos????? I'M SO HAPPY EHSODJWKDKSJD- thanks for all the new followers and the support!! <33

Ever since his fake death, Itadori has been training alone with the help of Gojo - and now, he works along a freshly new face, who belongs to a senior, founds out ex-salaryman named Nanami Kento. He's far a thousand times more strict than Gojo. Itadori doesn't really likes the change, because Nanami is a person he can't get along. This whole guy's appearance scream "work 4 life"; he has proved different, now he screams "work is shit - but I gotta do it because others won't".

They've just finished cleansing the outside of a movie theater off a few curses, when Itadori hears shouting from far behind them. Two figures approach, waving excessively. He quickly picks on Nanami's tired sigh beside him.

"Nanami! We figured out you'd be here! Our mission has been finished and we wanted to catch up to have lunch together!" A male clad in a full black outfit shouts, he has brown hair and a beanie on top of his head, looking quite content.

The other person simply trots next to him in silence, approaching with a friendly smile. They notice Itadori faster than the male, smile widening and quickly waving hello, suddenly eager to reach up to them. The gesture makes the pink haired boy perk up, curious to why the other person looked so joyful. His question is easily answered, when they tug on the man's sleeve and motion to him.

"Ino, we have a third buddy!" The dude looks at him with widened eyes. "So nice to meet you, I'm Y/N L/N! It's great to see new faces around!"

Itadori smiles at your energy, knowing already he would click with you very well.

"I'm Ino Takuma, sorry for not noticing you before! Your uniform looks cool." Itadori exchanges a few compliments with Ino, before the man turns to talk with Nanami, leaving him and you together.

"Yes! I'm Sukuna's vessel, Itadori Yuuji-desu! My type of woman is Jenn-"

You turn to him. "So, are you a first year?"

"Geh? Weren't you dead though?!"

"I was!- I am!- Please keep secret."

"Okay!"

"Ahem." Nanami coughs, drawing attention. "I requested you two to not come after me today. Itadori here is the reason why."

"That's no problem, we're very capable of keeping secrets." You threw your arm over Itadori's shoulder, him nodding along with you.

"Oh really, then remember to keep quiet about it. I'll let this slide." The group of students nervously at Nanami's intimidating tone. "But, I'll get to have my break alone."

"Gah!" Ino exclaimed, watching Nanami walk away; he also left the responsability of taking care of Itadori for you two, leaving without a word. "It really had to be today, when Nanami would take us to his favorite bakery..."

"Crybaby." You teased. "Itadori here can't go outside where anyone can see him, he's dead. So, we were to order food either way because he shouldn't be left out."

"Augh okay, it would be unfair."

"So, where are you staying Itadori?"

"At Gojo's state!"

"Whoa, I've never been there before." Ino commented, waiting as you sent a message to Ijichi to pick them up.

"He's my teacher, a very cool one!"

"I imagine! Ooookay, once we get there I'll get the food."

Itadori felt as his chest would burst of excitement, finally there was people around him again, he couldn't be less happy about it.

"Sharing is caring!"

Itadori laughed as you wrestled with Takuma for some fries, netflix long forgotten in the background, as watching the banter was way more entertaining. Most of the time, Ino rambled a lot about Nanami, while he rambled a lot about Gojo. The guy even showed him the cool scar under his beanie. He felt kinda upset after explaining the exchange was just temporary, his stay under Nanami's wing wasn't decisive, and therefore, he was more like a classmate than a partner.

Itadori also learned a lot about you. He was surprised to find out that you, although energetic, was the one to speak the lesser in conversations. His surprisement grew even bigger when you told him you're a exchange student from Kyoto, arriving Tokyo about the same month as him - thankfully, you were to say for good.

Conversations flowed easily in the air, until a voice from the doorway barged in.

"Yuuji-kun! Don't forget about your lessons! Hi kids! Bye kids!" Gojo said playfully, throwing the familiar punching bear to Itadori before leaving.

"What's this thing?" Ino asked.

"It's to help me control my cursed energy. So while I watch the movies, if I don't charge it with cursed energy it punches me square in the face. I thought I had mastered this thing already, but he insist I keep training with it." Itadori grumbles.

"At least it's cute." You commented, taking a sip of your drink.

"Until it punches you in your face without warning!" The pink haired boy barks.

The talks died down, the three of you eating quietly when another movie is played on the screen. Itadori didn't bother reading the title, it was a plain one about a zombie apocalypse that got him extremely bored, yet he kept watching still so the plushie didn't punch him in the face again; he's been keeping a record since all his last cursed energy training lessons were a sucess to this day. When his head started nodding and eyelids dropping Itadori can't remember well, about fourty five minutes of movie perhaps? Make it fifty, the second slumber took over his body completely.

When he awoke once again, it was near midnight, the clock on the wall told him so. He also noticed a soft and warm surface supporting his head, figures, it's your shoulder he's resting into, he feels an arm around his own shoulders and your cheek placed upon his hair.

"Hey, it's late." You immediately notices he's awake, calling out softly. "You should sleep on your room, or something, better to your spine."

He chuckles when you poke his side. "But I'm comfortable here."

"I'm surprised, you just met me today, and now is sleeping on my shoulder."

"I'm not, that happens often to me."

"Sleeping on people's shoulders?"

"No! Making friends quickly." Itadori likes your gentle warmth, your hug, everything makes him feel at home. "I met two more people before you for two weeks, but they can't see me, because I'm dead."

"So I'll keep you company, that's my new mission."

His eyes widen at that, a oh so little blush covering the tip of his ears.

"For how many time I slept anyway?" He asks.

"About two- no, three hours. You missed two movies, and this one is about to end."

"And you stayed here the whole time?" He motions to your shoulder.

"Yep. That reminds me I gotta pee."

Itadori grumbles, but quickly lifts himself off you, respecting your needs. That gives him some time to look around, he notices Ino is gone, and the plushie sits quietly at the other side of the couch, unmoving.

"Y/N! How did you manage to make it quiet down?" He's beyond bafflet.

"...que."

"What!"

"I said!" You arrive quickly at the doorframe, hands still wet from when you washed them. "I used my innate technique."

"Oh! How is it like?"

"It's kinda funny, gimme a moment." You left to wipe off your hands, coming back in a second. "So, just like Shoko, I produce reverse curse energy, but it's quite different than hers, I can't heal people. That's why we often call it positive energy instead. I can use it to soothe off negative energy, so the bear has no cursed energy right now."

"How does it works on people?" He felt very curious about everything, asking away like a kid.

"Since everyone has negative energy, it just makes you sleepy really. But when it comes to curses it's really practical, I can either weaken it or, if the curse is like grade three or four, I can slap them off existence completely by wiping all their energy." You were naturally proud of having a such versatile power, your own energy swirling with pride around you.

"That sounds amazing! Is it why I fell asleep though?"

"Nah, only if I did it on purpose. I guess you were just tired, hope you don't mind I decided to let you rest today."

"No way, it was a good nap."

You nodded. "By the way, Ino left to attend to a drinking party, he paid for our food."

"Drinking? Is he old?"

"Yeah, he's twenty." You chuckled, already expecting that kind of reaction.

"No way! He looks young just like us!"

"That's totally my reaction after I learned he's twenty!"

After that day, you started visiting Itadori weekly to daily, after exchanging numbers he made a little group with you and Ino, naming it the "Nanami trio". But really, he exchanges more texts with you in private, be them memes, cool images he wish to share, etcetera. Although, Ino wasn't left excluded, he ofter brough his xbox to connect to Itadori's tv room and you all would spend hours playing together; he just didn't spend much time with both of you as much. And that was okay.

For a few days, your connection with Itadori died down when he didn't reply to your texts. They would remain unread for some time, the longest being half a day, until he would spam apologies then move on with the topic. That became a routine until one day when you came over to check on Itadori unnanounced, needin to ease off your worries about the boy, only to find him sobbing in the middle of a hallway, staring ahead and beyond, his back to you.

"Ita-?"

"Egh!" Startled, he scrambled to wipe his eyes, turning to you. "H-hey, um, hi."

"What happened?"

"I- he-" His eyes didn't met yours, knuckles white in a death grip. You notice he has a few bandages thrown over his face and arms. The way his shoulders are drawn, as if he wants to shrink into himself is something you've experienced before.

"Something hard to talk about?"

He nods almost immediately, head still facing down.

"It's alright, come with me." You reach for his hands, grimacing slightly when his forceful grip is now on your hand, yet you don't comment on it. He follows you through the state wordlessly.

You two stop on the same tv room, sitting down on the couch. You then guide his head to your shoulder, gently massaging his scalp with the free hand.

"It's alright."

Those two words are chanted like a prayer for the next half hour, at some point, Itadori twisted his body towards yours and unknowingly caged you between him and the sofa arm. He embraced you with a force you didn't have in you, like he didn't want to lose one another. Painful or not, not a muscle moved on your body. He needed a shoulder to cry on.

Thirty minutes passed like seconds, you peered down only to find the boy confortably napping against your bosom; at some point you just became the cold side of the pillow to him. That's alright. It brings you joy to be the mom friend anyways. So you decided to join the sleepland aswell, arms still secured around his shoulders and the back of his head.

It feels like the nap hasn't been long, though, because you can feel Itadori's grip loosening and therefore, you're awake.

"Sorry if I broke any bones, in advance."

"Wow, and you only warn me now."

He laughs at your comeback, hands still secured around your waist.

"I'm surprised you let me uh, cuddle you for comfort - and sleep. I don't understand it? You just make me sleepy." He rambled, keeping eye contact with you while his head still rests on your chest.

"That's a piece of cake when you have younger siblings who seek for you every night they get a nightmare."

"Does that mean I can come to you again if I have a nightmare?" There it is, his togepi-kirby cutesy face.

"Are you four?"

"That's mean!" Itadori blushed, squeezing you on his arms. "I like the contact. It puts me at ease."

"Mm, do you want to talk about it?"

He gulped. "No, not really."

Your peach haired friend remained silent, and so did you. It seems he doesn't intend in letting you go soon, or he just really forgot to mention it. It gives them time to think, your younger sisted used to do that sometimes, back in Kyoto.

"Y/N, wanna watch anything?"

"Sure, have you watched Parasyte before?"

"No, let's give it a try then!" Itadori glances at the remote, then back at you - making you confused over his hesitation to move. He notices you noticed it, chuckling nervously. "To be honest, I don't wanna let go."

"It's hurting my back."

"SORRY I'M SORRY!" He jumped away from you like a cat would jolt away from a cucumber, making you snicker.

"It's okay, I just wanted to change positions."

And to tease you, but he didn't need to know that part.

He glared at you with a small pout, typing the initials of Parasyte on the search bar. Outside his line of vision, you were grinning like a idiot, his sweeteness took a tow on you. All the people of Tokyo you met really held a way different spirit from your classmates in Kyoto, Itadori being the nicest of all. It's surprising him being Sukuna's vessel to begin with; being honest, you felt drawn by it.

"Y/N, it's startiiiiing." He cut your daydreaming short, slumping on your side and propping his head on your shoulder.

"This again?" You throw an arm around his shoulders, very much like the first time he cuddled himself on you.

"Don't blame me, you're the one who wanted to change positions. Guess I'll just make some alterations since I'm awake this time!" One of his arms went behind your back and circled your waist, hand resting at your hip.

"It's definely different, since the other time you drooled on me."

"Hhgh, okay okay! Let me enjoy this." For perhaps the actual first time, you're able to watch without exchanging words with one another.

And this time, it's you who's head loll to the side, nose buried on his soft rose perfumed hair. Itadori doesn't comment on it yet, his free hand moves under your legs to lift your whole body up efortlessly when he senses you have fallen asleep.

"I remember you said it's bad for my spine, I wouldn't mind it... yours however."

The boy makes a beeline to the guest room, he sighs when there is no choice but open the door with his foot. Inside, he places you carefully in the soft bed.

Before he could leave, a hand reaches up for his sleeve.

"Itadori," He turned, looking at you. "Make me company?"

He giggles softly - you think it sounds like a highschool girl. "You should start calling me by my first name!" Itadori rambles as he climbs on the bed, arms wrapping around your waist in a motion you're familiar with.

"Yuuji, I'm tired, let me sleep."

"But I wanna talk more..." He pouts. "Also, are we, um, dating?"

You wriggle around, bringing his head down to peck on his forehead, teasing. "Correction, I want to date you."

"Uh, oh." A blush coats his face so quickly, you'd say someone dumped a bucket of red paint on his face.

"Is that a no?"

"No!"

"So it is a no."

"Christ, will you stop teasing for a second, I'm trying to talk here." He makes an angry version of his togepi-kirby face, you can't help but grin.

"You amuse me, but okay. I'll do it for you."

"Thanks." He blinks, the blush slowly fading away. "You know, I lied, not about the contact, I like the contact nonetheless-"

His hand moves to play with yours, such as tapping his tips against yours, or meassuring the palms.

"-it's you who brings me comfort."

It's also your turn to blush, that line was seriously charming.

"Yeah."

"Yeah?"

"Yes, we're dating now." You respond, a little eagerly. "Can I kiss you?"

"Please."

This is the best person I could ask for, Itadori thinks, keeping his eyes open as yours shut during the kiss, whom I won't change for anything else in this world.

When you both separate, Itadori feels drowsy and sleepy. His face fits perfectly on your shoulder as always.

"Goodnight, my favorite person."

[theduosetter]

━ 𝐖𝐡𝐞𝐫𝐞 𝐓𝐰𝐨 𝐎𝐥𝐝 𝐇𝐞𝐚𝐫𝐭𝐬 𝐌𝐞𝐞𝐭 ║𝐊𝐮𝐫𝐨𝐨 𝐓𝐞𝐭𝐬𝐮𝐫𝐨

☆ Pairing: Au!Kuroo Tetsuro x f!reader

☆ Summary: Two broken hearts never truly heal no matter how many years pass. Maybe because the only person who can heal it is the one who caused the tear.

☆ Warning(s): angst, fluff,

☆ A|N: any feedback is appreciated! If you can please give it a heart or reblog it would really help my writing. Thank you!

Kuroo sighed for what seemed the millionth time today. His mind kept wandering off somewhere else, today felt different. There was something within him saying that today wasn't going to be the same again.

His phone vibrated once more alerting him of another incoming message. The screen lit up with the name Nanami. His lips moved as he saw the words spread out on the white background. Closing his eyes he leaned back against his office chair.

"What's with your face?" a voice spoke.

Kuroo rolled his eyes, "Nothing is wrong with my face, Kenma."

"Liar." he placed the folder down on his desk, "Is it Nanami?"

"No..." he half smiled "She's great actually... things are good between us right now."

"For someone who says that it sure doesn't look like it." Kenma said "Could have fooled me."

He sat up and looked at his friend, "Is there something that still needs to be done?"

Kenma shook his head "No everything important got taken care of."

Standing up he grabbed his blazer and put it on. "If anyone else calls can you take care of it?"

"Ok." before Kuroo could make it out the door, Kenma then asked him "Are you going to be alright?"

"I'll be alright. See you tomorrow..." he slightly smiled then took off.

Your feet grew tired as you kept walking the busy streets. The sun was just about to set down on the ocean. Even though it was warm, the air was nothing but fresh, the perk of living near coast.

A small smile formed on your lips as you saw kids running around the nearby playground, playing with their friends. It was the purest sound in the world; you thought.

There was never a doubt in your mind that being a mom was a gift. You hoped one day you too would have the chance at raising a mini you or a little boy that looked like your partner.

Your phone then rang. You quickly took it out of your bag and accepted the call.

"Hey love." you said "I'm on my way back home."

"I can't wait to see you." he said, making your chest tighten "I might be preparing something delicious for tonight."

"Really?" you asked "What's the occasion?"

He smiled, leaning back against the sink. "What, I can't just do something special for the love of my life?"

Your smile faltered as you remembered those words. Those were the ones that hurt you the most, even after almost 10 years.

"Of course you can." you replied "Can I have a hint on what it may be?"

"You would figure it out right away like last time. I'm not making that mistake again." he chuckled.

"It was one time, h/n." you smiled small, "Do you need me to bring something home from the store? I'm close to it."

"Pick out any drink you want to have and dessert if you'd like."

"Okay now I'm really curious about what you have up your sleeve, boy." you chuckled.

He bit his lip, smiling as he heard your laughter. "Don't take too long, alright?"

"I'll do my best love since it is rush hour. Wait for me?"

"Like you have to ask." he leaned over checking the food "I can't wait to see you. Text me when you get to the station."

"I will, love." you bid him goodbye and hung up.

It's sad how he has tried his best to make you happy and yet there's never a moment where something doesn't remind you of him. All these years you still wonder about how he's doing with his new partner. If he could accomplish the goals he had set out for himself. Even the thought if he maybe... still thought about you like you did.

Sighing, you shook your head "Stop it... you can't keep doing this to him. You're with h/n now not with him, he chose you agreed. No more second guessing." You mumbled.

You were about to turn left at the end of the playground when a stranger collided into you. Your feet slipped from underneath you. The bar that was put up around the playground was too far away for you to hold on to. Folding your elbows back, you opened your hands wide so you could stop your head from hitting the pavement.

Lucky enough, the tall stranger reacted in time and pulled you into him to avoid you injuring yourself. "I'm so sorry, are you alright?"

"Y-yeah... I'm fine..." you replied "That was close- wow I almost fell-" you tilted your head up and your breathing stopped.

The stranger kept their arm around your back, holding you against his chest. His eyes roamed the details on your face, from your eyes to shape of your lips. His heart was pounding against his chest, not believing you were in front of him.

"K-Kuroo..." you muttered.

"Y/n... I never thought I'd see you here." his brain couldn't wrap around the idea that you were here.

Realizing your chest was too close to his, you gently stepped back. Your cheeks flushed "I- um... I-I work around here."

"Right..." he mumbled "I thought you had stayed in Tokyo, is all."

"I got a job offer awhile back." You said "I've been living here ever since. What about you?..."

He rubbed the back of his neck, feeling shy suddenly. "I'm working with a company on a project along with Kenma."

"Wow... I knew Kenma was in town but didn't think you'd be here as well."

His head shot up "You spoke to Kenma?"

"Yeah..." you answered "He reached out to me and asked if we could meet up. I've been busy so I haven't had the chance..."

"Why didn't Kenma say anything to me?..." there was hurt in his eyes from the sudden news. "I thought Kenma of all people-"

You cut him off "I told Kenma that I didn't want you knowing. Don't blame him..."

"I see..."

The cars passed by, not knowing or caring about the two ex lovers on the sidewalk. Every person was moving on with their lives, focusing on getting home to their families.

You tried your best to calm your emotions. It was difficult to keep the facade up. Your body was itching to be again in his arms. "I should get going... goodbye Kuroo." you walked passed him hoping to forget you ever saw him.

However, Kuroo didn't want to let you go again this time. "Y/n, wait!" he yelled as he ran after you.

"He's not calling my name..." you repeated under your breath "He's not calling my name." Ignoring the loud sounds coming from the cars, you crossed the street.

"Y/n!" Kuroo yelled louder as he reached for you and held your wrist gently in his hand.

Looking over your shoulder, you made eye contact. "What are you doing, Kuroo?..."

"We need to talk." he gently spoke "It's been too many years."

"There's nothing to say about anything." you looked into his eyes "We both have our different lives, let's focus on that okay?"

"I don't want to walk away from you and regret it for the rest of my life again." Kuroo begged, "Please, give me a few minutes to talk with you...please."

Looking down at your watch, you saw you had some minutes to spare. "Okay..."

He let go of you, "Come on, I know where we should go." you followed him to the nearby bridge that was above an intersection along with shops down the street. You walked up the stairs and sat down on a bench that was in the middle of the two stairways.

It was awkward. As the seconds passed by, all you could think of were the things you wanted to say but felt afraid of saying it out loud. You were timid when it came to expressing how you felt since you were in high school. Yet when you met Kuroo that barrier was destroyed only for it to be rebuilt again a few years later.

"What did you need to tell me?" you asked, playing with your fingers.

"I'm sorry for how we ended things." your movement stopped "I thought back then that it was for the best. I didn't want to continue fighting every time with you. The amount of times we ended up apart became more frequent than the times we had ever spent together." His gazed was fixed on ground feeling too vulnerable to look at you "I didn't want to keep hurting you."

"I can't believe- why now?" you asked "Was that the reason you chose? You didn't want to stay and fixed things so you let me go?"

"We couldn't make things better and you know that y/n." he answered "Every time we tried it put distance between us more and more."

You closed your eyes trying to not let the tears fall "It's the fact that you lost hope in us that hurt Kuroo, not the breakup."

"It hurt me too..." he explained "But it hurt me more knowing you were suffering and not giving you the happiness that you deserved."

"I didn't care..." you sniffled "All I wanted was to be with you and solved it together. I kept on trying to find an answer as to what I did that was so wrong that made you leave me."

"What are you talking about-"

"You seriously don't remember?" you looked at him "The things you said to me that day... when I asked you why and all you said was because I didn't love you anymore, I don't want to stay by you. It's for the best Y/n go find your own life and forget about me."

He looked away, closing his eyes tightly. "I didn't mean to sound harsh..."

"But you did." you wiped away your tears "What hurt was the fact that you acted happy the last few days with me then suddenly... you ripped it off like a bandaid Kuroo..."

"I know..." he said "I know I fucked up- I kept thinking back every day after what happened."

You got up from the bench "Why did you pretend you were happy with me?"

"I wasn't pretending!" he exclaimed, getting up as well. "I was happy being with you."

"Could have fooled me... because knowing this now and you not remembering what you told me makes it harder to believe anything you say!"

"I need you. Trust me when I say that I still love you y/n." he stated.

"I-I can't..." you muttered, covering your face.

You were a sobbing mess, and it broke his heart that he was hurting you again when he vowed never to. Kuroo stepped forward slowly, trying to approach you.

"Please don't cry..." he said.

"I'm just tired of this... feeling this vulnerable and thinking about you," you admitted, "when I should focus on my future and not on the past..."

Kuroo stood in front of you, "Do you still love me?..." you didn't answer. He carefully took your hands into his own as he uncovered your face. "Do you still love me?..." he repeated himself.

His touch was arm, your head was dizzy. It's been so long since you were this close to him again. 'Did I still love him?' you thought, trying to figure out the answer on your own.

He gently wiped away your tears, "Because I haven't stopped Y/n... no matter where I'm going or who I'm with my mind goes back to you."

"Where was this 7 years ago?" you questioned "This love and worry you have about me? How you don't want to see me walk away from you again. Why did you show it too late to me? I wasted so much time wondering over someone who never once batted an eye to me when I saw you on campus those two years after our break up. I almost failed because my emotions were all over the place. If it hadn't been for the friends I had I wouldn't have moved on. Now you suddenly see me again one day and you confess you still love me? When you had chance after chance to tell me but chose not to." you clenched your jaw "You don't get to comeback and tell me you love me... it's not fair."

"I lived with the ache in my chest whenever I saw someone or something that reminded me of you. Out of all the y/n's in the world and each time someone said your name I turned around it hopes it was you but came empty every time it was a stranger." he breathed out trying to not break down in front of you but it became impossible. His voice cracked "I-I... still wish everyday that it had been you... y-you by my side a-and not someone else..."

"I wished we had met when we were older and wiser..." you whispered "Maybe then... this pain wouldn't exist within us."

He held your hand to his chest holding it tightly as he closed his eyes, trying to memorize your warmth. "We didn't know what to do... we were young and naive thinking love was such an easy thing to feel." he sniffled "It would be so easy... so damn e-easy... to say I'm sorry and start all over again. To go back to the days where were in l-love... without any problems..."

In all your years you had known Kuroo it was such a rare sight for him to cry and breakdown in front of you. After years, you were surprised to see he didn't feel shy or embarrassed of showing it to you again. It's like he had grown.

Gently you cupped his right cheek and he leaned into your touch. "I still do love you Kuroo..." you confessed "It scares me that I haven't been able to move on without you."

"I'm so sorry..." the pool of tears he held in his eyes were finally escaping "Maybe things would have worked o-out... if we had- no I had expressed my feelings earlier and told you how I felt from the beginning. If I had opened up myself up to you more and not runaway from the only person that had ever made me feel a whole. But I can't... I-I can't turn back time that was then and t-this is now..."

It was late. Yet hearing those words that you had dreamed for years to happen finally did. Life was definitely funny sometimes. One day you can keep convincing yourself you don't need that person that you're fine without them, then have it change with one interaction.

Smiling weakly you wiped away his tears. He smiled small feeling your thumb gently move against his cheek. "I can't believe I'm saying this but..." a chuckle escaped your lips "After all we've been through and still you make my heart beat like a teenager all over again."

"I would do anything to see you smile, Y/n." his eyes shined brightly as the sun's light reflected off his hazel orbs.

Your faces began to grow closer to one another. The space that was in between you two got shorter the longer you stared into each other's eyes.

"There's not anything else in this world that makes me happy as you do, y/n." he said.

Your foreheads gently rested against one another. His hands held your own tightly and brought them up to his lips. It made your stomach grow butterflies again.

Closing your eyes you focused on his touch not on the sounds of traffic. "I’d have my heart broken all over again if it meant that I could have those first six months with you."

He added "Those were the best months of my life."

Your phone then vibrated with messages coming in all at once. Kuroo freed one of your hands, you unlocked your device to see they were from h/n.

"Shoot..." you bit your lip.

"Is everything alright?" he asked.

"My...um boyfriend... is asking where I am..." you answered feeling conflicted as to what would be the best thing to do.

"You call him and reassure him you're okay." he said "If I was in his place I'd be worried too."

You were surprised by how mature he was, nodding you dialed his number. After a few seconds h/n picked up. Kuroo stood by your side and waited for you to finish.

"Y/n! Where are you I've been worried sick!" he exclaimed.

"I'm sorry... I saw a friend and they needed to talk to me. I didn't mean to make you worry." you explained.

He breathed out in relief knowing you were okay. "It's okay, I'm glad you're okay. Are you on your way back home or are you still with them?"

"I'm still with them I didn't realize it would take long. But I'll be going to the station soon to grab the last train home." you answered.

"Alright, are you sure you don't want me to go pick you up?" he asked "I don't want anything bad to happen to you."

"No don't worry I'll be home soon. I'll make sure to keep you posted okay?"

"Okay, please be careful. I love you." he said.

"I will, see you soon." you hung up then looked at him. "I should get going, Kuroo."

"I understand." he kissed your forehead softly "You don't owe me an explanation okay? Let's take it one step at a time. And if you still want to see me then I'll be here waiting for you. Like I should have done in the beginning."

Your heart swelled with joy that you wrapped your arms around his neck and hugged him tightly. He smiled softly hugging you back tightly, "I missed you so much." you spoke burying your face in his neck.

"I missed you too, Y/n." he rested his chin on top of your head "Can I take you home?"

"I'd like that."

It didn't matter how long it took, he wasn't going to mess this second chance he had with you. He would wait a year if he needed to to be alongside you again. You were his world.

[darkmulti]

Hey! please don't ruin your mood bcoz of some idiotic hateful anons, I honestly don't understand how can they spread hatred during Christmas season. I had an ask, feel free to do it later on if you are busy now. (NON CON JK, where reader is the wife of his mafia employee, JK is the mafia boss, he sees her during a company party and gets hell bent to get her. So mafia boss JK barges into their house and fucks reader in front of her hubby and then takes her away.)

-> thanks for the reassurance!

-> sorry for any mistakes

-> I do not condone this kind of behaviour. This is purely fictional!

⚠️: NON CON, MURDER

“Will do, Mr. Jeon. I’m gonna head home now. My wife’s waiting for me.”

“Don’t forget we have an event to attend at 8. Don’t be late and bring your wife along so we don’t look suspicious.”

Your husband nodded and left his office to go home to you

Jungkook has met you a couple of times

For him, it was love at first sight

today was the day he was going to get you

He planned everything perfectly

Jungkook knew how much you meant to your husband

Your husband would always talk about you

Not to Jungkook, but to his co-workers/friends

Jungkook would just over hear the great things about you

You were intelligent, playful, loving and kind

Not to mention, you were absolutely gorgeous

He had to avoid looking at you or else he would get a boner after seeing you in a tight dress that hugged your body perfectly

Jungkook needed you in his life

You would make him the happiest man in the world

Call him delusional, but he really thinks that you’re destined to be with him

8pm, at the event

There you were

You were wearing a stunning dress that complimented your skin tone

You looked like an angel that fell from the sky

The only thing that ruined the sight was your husband standing beside you, giving you love eyes and your ring finger occupied

Jungkook swore to himself that he will buy you the best of the best

He will buy you the most expensive and rare engagement ring

As well as wedding ring

He stared at you until you made eye contact with him

He continued staring, not caring anymore

Tonight, you’ll be all his

Your husband pulled you along with him, towards Mr. Jeon

You have to admit

He is a sexy man

His dominant presence makes you feel weak and needy

You noticed some sexual tension between you and him but always reminded yourself that you’re a married women

The sexual tension was probably just an attraction

After all, your husband doesn’t satisfy your sexual needs, yet you love him dearly

Maybe Mr. Jeon would be able to satisfy your sexual needs

However, you didn’t have the heart to cheat on your husband

He loved you endlessly

You couldn’t sleep with his boss

You were so lost in your thoughts you didn’t hear them calling out for you

“Ms. Kim, are you okay?”

“It’s actully Mrs. Kim, Mr. Jeon. Baby, are you okay? Are you not feeling well?”

Jungkook clenched his jaw when your husband corrected him

“Maybe you should take her home. She doesn’t look too well.”

“You’re right Mr. Jeon. I’ll take her home immediately.”

Your husband guided you to his car

You guys came home and your husband helped you change and get into bed

Though you were fine physically, mentally you were feeling like complete shit

You thought about cheating on your husband

Who does that?

“Baby, you should get some rest.”

“Okay, goodnight.”

“Goodnight, love.”

You fell asleep in your husbands arms while Jungkook watched from afar, through the window

His blood was boiling, but he kept his cool

By tomorrow, you will be in his arms!

His team didn’t even try to be quiet

It was two against eight

They would easily win

Plus, your husband wasn’t a fighter, he was more of a reporter and hacker

They broke through the front door and came upstairs where they found you guys awake and panicking

Your husband was covering you with his body but it became less stiff when you both saw it was Mr. Jeon

“Mr. Jeon! You scared us! What is the meaning of this?! You almost gave my wife and I a heart attack.”

“My wife.” Jungkook mumbled, loud enough that you all heard

He was sick of it

“My wife and I a heart attack, my wife is waiting at home for me, it’s actually Mrs. Kim not Ms.” He mimicked

“From now on it’ll be Mrs. Jeon. Tie them down.”

His men grabbed your husband out of the bed and threw him on the floor

They tied him up until he wasn’t able to move

Two guards stood by him while Jungkook walked towards you

“Mr. Jeon let my husband go!”

“Can’t do such a thing. He’s in our way.”

“Who’s way?! He’s in no ones way! I don’t understand!”

You started backing away from him but your back hit the bed frame and he was already near your face

“He’s in the way of us. It’s better if I get rid of him. But before I do, I want to show him one last thing.”

Jungkook pulled you to the edge of the bed where you could see your husband on his knees tied up

He was looking up at you, screaming at Jungkook to let you go

At the same time, he wondered if he had done anything wrong to deserve this

You were wearing a silk top along with silk shorts

It was turning Jungkook on even more

Your hard nipples exposed

Your shorts exposing your ass cheek

He pulled your shorts and panties down

“Let go of me you idiot!” You screamed, fear taking over your whole body

He didn’t listen and rammed into you

You cried out loud and looked at your husband for help but he was looking down avoiding all eye contact

It was understandable though

Who would want to watch their wife go through that?

All you could do was cry and shake

You couldn’t protect yourself

All these men were armed and way stronger than you

“Listen to me, slut! I own you now, not your little hubby. You will be my wife, the mother of my kids! You will be my everything and I will be your everything, understood?”

You nodded your head and sobbed

“Good, now scream my name. Tell your ex hubby who you belong to!”

You didn’t listen at first

It was so humiliating

Your husband was on the floor, crying

“I b-belong to... you, Mr. J-Jeon.”

“LOUDER!” He yelled

“I belong to you! You own me! You’re my everything and I’m your everything! He doesn’t mean anything to me anymore!”

You heard your husband sob which broke your heart into a billion pieces

You never thought you’d be saying those words but in order for the pain to stop you needed to submit to him

“That’s my good girl.” He pulled you onto his lap and started kissing your face and neck, marking you

“Kill him now.”

One of his men pulled out a gun and shot your husband in the head right in front of you

“Now that I think about it. All you guys saw her beautiful body.” In a blink of an eye, Jungkook reached into his pocket and shot all his men

You kept your face in his neck, not wanting to see the bodies

Jungkook put his pants back on and wrapped you in a blanket

He carried you to the car and drove back to his place

No one has heard of you since then

[http-mingi]

room 657. ⤑ jjk + kth ☏︎

⟶ 𝘴𝘶𝘮𝘮𝘢𝘳𝘺 : you didn't even realise you were calling a hotline. you're best friend jimin gave you a random number. he said it was a surprise ? well you're in for one.

♡︎ 𝘱𝘢𝘪𝘳𝘪𝘯𝘨 : sexhotline!au, worker!taehyung, worker!jungkook, student!reader

♡︎ 𝘨𝘦𝘯𝘳𝘦 : ∝ filthy smut if you squint there’s fluff

♡︎ : 𝘸𝘰𝘳𝘥 𝘤𝘰𝘶𝘯𝘵 : sorry i fr forgot to do the word count !!

⟶ 𝘸𝘢𝘳𝘯𝘪𝘯𝘨𝘴 : stressed reader, soft!dom jungkook, harddom!tae , big cock!tae, bigcock!jungkook, size kink??, sub!reader, pussy eating, dirty talk, face riding, hair pulling, fingering, cum eating, praise kinda?? unprotected sex, roughsex, multiple orgasms, heavy heavy dom sub themes, brat!reader , dom/sub themes, pet names, daddy!kink, threesome, dirty talk, cunnilingus, orgasm denial, begging, humiliation, creampie, intense orgasms(?), multiple orgasms, cum eating, insecurities, derogatory language, sexual face-slapping, punishments, dumbification, overstimulation, basically pwp.

let's go!

you sighed heavily as your boots clicked along the laminated floor of your university.

today so far had been a hassle. traffic kept you 2 hours late from school you were earlier fired from your job. your ex boyfriend had recently been stalking you and to top it off there was no hot water this morning.

you were beyond stressed.

most of the time you could deal with it you had thousands of stress relieving techniques. but this time you were all types of frustrated, with school, your job, sexually, friendships, family. you sighed heavily as you dragged yourself inside your classroom.

the bright walls of your university aided in your pounding headache. the distinct smell of coffee and muffins flooded your nose as you blinked slowly.

the tall dark bookcases shielding you from the sunlight as you sluggishly made your way to your seat.

you slumped down on your chair as you massaged your temples in effort to calm your self down. your headache clouded your vision immensely you hastily downed your water and some paracetamol nursing your forehead throughout.

you hadn’t been out on a real date in months. it seemed like the universe didn’t want you on dates, you rarely ever found yourself being okay with that fact.

whilst in a trance your best friend jimin walked excitedly into the classroom.

he constantly and i mean constantly reminded you off the things you were missing out on but it wasn’t like you didn’t want to go out but the issue was you were way too busy.

being an english, law and history major meant that you were constantly studying literally.

you did love him though he always tried for you.

"_____ !! " your friend jimin called out to you. you grumbled in annoyance as you turned your neck towards him.

"what." you sighed out tiredly.

" what the- what's wrong with you ______ ?!" he exclaimed loudly.

" jimin... why are you so loud. " you whine loudly.

“ shut up ___ im literally your only friend.” he said nonchalantly.

“ stopppp!” you whined with a breathy giggle.

“ anyways what are you doing here you have biology?” you asked innocently wiping your exhausted eyes.

“ uhhh... well..”

“ spit it outtt.” you say , head tilting slightly.

" sorry _____ i just- i have a number to give you and i don't call it until you get home! trust me you'll thank me later!!”

0800-765-877

it looked like a legit number so you decided to trust him this one time.

"come on ____ class ended 20 minutes ago wake up." he whined loudly.

" what.....? " you yawned as you groggily wiped your eyes.

jimin let out an exasperated sigh as he dragged you out of class and to your apartment.

" i love you but sometimes i feel like stabbing you. " he says plainly.

" sorry chim, ive just been really stressed lately. i'll make it up to you i promise."

"you can make it up to me by calling that number, it'll solve all your problems i promise."

" jimin... did you connect me to a sugar daddy or something? " you asked as you flopped down onto your sofa

" something like that." he said grinning

" okay well you can go home now . " you muttered yawning

" promise me you'll call them? "

" okay, okay now you can go. "

as jimin left you groaned into your pillow did you have to call them it wasn't really gonna change anything. but at the same time jimin would do the same for you.

your home was simple, minimalistic but you loved it your soft grey sofa in the corner. your small tv playing comfort noise in the background.

you fought your tiredness to finish your essay due for next week. you ached in places you didn't even know you had the most you were aching was down there.

you hadn't had any sexual action in weeks even months.

you decided to go up to your room to try and relive yourself.

you sighed as your hands hovered over the pulsating area.

as a finger trailed it's way up your slit you involuntarily whined as you got tired of the foreplay you plunged a finger inside your soppy cunt.

your plush walls also fighting to relish your much needed orgasm as you groaned into your pillow.

you moaned, whined, groaned and breathed heavily as you desperately tried to reach your high.

you angrily quickened your pace. you were trying so hard yet you still weren't feeling anything.

in a huff you decided to stop trying to reach your endless high.

in the corner of your eye you saw the number jimin had left you.

it wouldn't hurt to call right?

it wasn't gonna be anything weird..... right ?

you took a small breathe as your fingered trembled attempting to type in the numbers.

1 ring

2 rings

3 rings

......

" h-hello? " you whispered out meekly

" hey honey, why don't you speak up for us?" the man on the other end spoke in a deep voice

" im sorry i- i don't know what this- is r-really for?" you spoke slightly louder as you stumbled over your words

"it's a sexhotline darling? "

" i- i well oh...” you huffed out , eyes widening softly you were lost in a trance of thought.

you were suddenly put on hold.

your eyebrows furrowed in confusion as you gave yourself time to think.

it wouldn’t hurt right?

you were basically an adult, you felt like a teenage girl again.

so you decided.

Putting a client on hold was a part of their fun. It allows the person to wait and to draw out the anticipation. however in this case you were just confused.

you’ve been pacing back and forth inside your bedroom for minutes it was half eleven in the night , and you certainly didn’t think that your attention would be on this instead of your essay.

suddenly you heard another 'hello' erupt from the phone quickly you grabbed your device breathing heavily you gulped and mustered up your voice.

" h- hi i just want you to know that y-you can carry on I've been- struggling and i- need some just some help?" you say whispering the last part.

" you want us to help you cum bun? " another voice said this time it was lighter, kinder in a way.

“don’t make us talk to ourselves, darling.” the other man snarls.

a gasp emits from your dry lips when the tone of his voice turns firm. there was a strict, domineering tinge in his speech that made you sit still. you were too shocked to reply as your mind tried to comprehend the situation that you got yourself into.

“I-I…” you stuttered completely, wanting to smack yourself in the face. the pet names, their voices it was all over whelming you too much.

you let out a needy whine, both of the men groaned quietly into the phone.

" how old are you baby ? " baby. they called you baby.

" i-im 19? "

" fuck, will you be okay with this?" they ask to make sure

jungkook can’t help the soft growl escape his lips. It has been so rare for him to receive callers who aren’t twenty-five and above, and you might be his first time.

“Ohh, baby girl,” he bites his lip, “I think you’re the first client I’ve had who’s so young.” jungkook says to you

“ is that okay , i-im sorry- "

“Oh, its more than okay , baby. You still wanna continue? I can make you feel so…” he pauses, groaning quietly to himself, “so good.”

your pussy clenches around nothing as you felt yourself getting wetter by the second

"  yes daddy. " you say nodding to yourself. you suddenly froze as you realised the contents of your words

taehyung's eyes widen in shock, his mouth agape, certainly not expecting that sudden word to come out of your lips. He throws his head back, closing his eyes for a brief moment as he feels his dick harden.

It was so difficult for him to hold himself back because all he wanted to do was to say the dirtiest, nastiest things that he wants to do to you in your ear. but he had to slow down.

“daddy? Oh, what makes you call me that, hm? baby?”

you feel your throat go dry, your eyes wide in shock. You didn’t know what to respond without being so shocked with yourself.

" i-i just really need you please please please i need it. " you let it all out, you couldn't be bothered to hide it anymore.

“don’t be a brat kitten.“ taehyung snarled into the phone.

“ b-but daddy! please i- i need it so so bad it’s not fair!“ you whined softly as your fingers ghosted your aching, soppy cunt.

they both groaned loudly, as jungkook conversed with taehyung

" kook, fuck i need to do her in real life she's making this so hard for me."

" same here let's just go for it here she's going to make me cum in my pants." he sighed as he palmed himself to your weak whimpers.

" darling, me and tae were wondering if you wanted to do this in real life- we'd fuck you so good honey, you'd become our little cum dump id love to see your body tremble to the force of my cock. " taehyung said interrupting jungkook.

" yes.. please you said as you moaned quietly to their words

" okay bun, we'll text you where to meet us." jungkook breathed out.

the atmosphere was dripping with heavy lust your eyes shut right as you relished their deep gutural voices.

“ i can’t cum daddy please help me cum pleas-“ you begged in frustration

“oh honey, it’s okay sh- sh it’s ok ill help you just be patient okay? you can do that for me right?” jungkook said in a calm tone

" what's your name by the way."

" it's ____." you say meekly

" ____ edge yourself, fuck yourself just do not cum. "

and with that in the call ended

you sighed loudly grinning slightly, you were gonna get your brains done out by two sexy sounding men.

you smiled to yourself giddily as you finally got some sleep.

________________

the next morning you got up and did your daily routine entirely different you waxed everywhere, shaved, exfoliated, moisturised, basically every strawberry flavoured you had in your bathroom.

it was a Saturday, you had time to spare you texted jimin to meet him before you went to meet 'kook' and the other guy.

not to mention you were frustrated beyond belief you had done what they asked you to do and you half hate half love them for it.

on one hand you could cum from any suggestive touch you were given.

on the other hand you couldn't help but want to thank them you felt so ready for them.

you walked to the cafe.

the soft brown walls encompanied the mahogany floors and the cascade of plants across the room as you happily walked into the bustling cafe.

" what's got you so excited." he said grinning like the Cheshire cat

" uh nothing i just had some good sleep last night. " a lie.

" oh really? "

" yeah i even finished my essay!" not true but not false at the same time.

" wow! " jimin looked at you shocked

" jimin do you really have that little faith in me. " you say annoyed

" to be honest no. " he said chuckling

" jiminnn, well i have to be going now i have an appointment soon. " you explain pouting

" an appointment where? "

" somewhere special ? " you say in attempt to hide

" if you say so. " he uttered playfully and he watches you walk away

you stared at the building in front of you as you checked the address again and again it was a massive condo.

you rang the bell of the apartment square and dialled in the number seconds later you were buzzed in.

you took the elevator and anxiously played with your fingers you finally reached the floor you were headed to and walked into room 657 .

" h-hello i-im here it's ______ " you say confused you really made a large mistake.

suddenly turning around, you were pulled into a sloppy kiss. You immediately relaxed into it, wrapping your arms around his neck the deeper it went. Before it could go on too long, he pulled away.

Pressed between both of their bodies, you could help the way your body reacted. Your lips met Taehyung's again and you whimpered.

Jungkook took the opportunity to press his lips against your neck, skimming them over the collar now around your neck.

He hands gripped your waist, pulling your shirt up ever so slightly to touch the skin that became exposed.

Goosebumps across your skin and you gasped into Taehyung's mouth. The elder chuckled, reaching down to where Jungkook's deft fingers explored to tug up the hem of your shirt.

you gasped loudly as you tensed under their touch.

Already, you could feel your mind turning fuzzy, falling into your submissive roll to let them mold you how they wanted.

Jungkook chuckled as you lifted your arms, allowing Taehyung to pull your shirt off. Left in your bra, you couldn't help but cover your chest as vulnerability set in.

"None of that, bun," Jungkook growled softly, ripping your arms away from your chest. "You wanna be a good girl for us right? Let us take care of you?"

"Y-Yes..." You whined, whining when Taehyung leaned down pressing kisses against your chest above the seam of your bra. Gasping, you pushed your chest out to get more of the feeling.

"What a good girl," Taehyung cooed, falling to his knees in front of you.

You leaned back, using Jungkook as support to help Taehyung pull your jeans off completely. He tossed them away in a heap nearby and without wasting a second, his mouth was on your core.

The fabric of your panties put on the side, feeling his mouth on you fully but as he slid his tongue over your slit and caught your clit, you let out a soft moan.

"What a good kitten for us," Jungkook groaned, hands still cupping your breasts. He pinched your nipples, making your back arch as you cried out.

“Is that pretty pussy wet, Princess? Does your cunt ache to be filled by my cock?” jungkook coaxes

The filth of his words doesn’t surprise you, Under his teasing words, you feel yourself grow wet, your lust-filled desire mingling with the humiliation that flutters through you.

"Aw, your pussy that sensitive, baby?" Taehyung cooed pressing his middle finger to glide directly over the patch where your clit was, making your hips curve inwards as the intensity was blare enough to startle you.

He chuckled deeply at that, kind of sounding like a purr and just when you didn't think he could fuck with your sanity anymore than he was already doing, he turned his head to the side and lapped his wet muscle along your jugular vein before enclosing his lips area the area for harsh suck.

you moaned loudly as you arched your back against jungkook. taehyung put one leg over his shoulder to go deeper.

"Daddy!" You cried as his tongue slid through your folds. He moaned at the unimpeded taste of your cunt. Circling your entrance, he eagerly tasted everything you had to offer.

" don't take it all tae, shit she looks hot." jungkook groaned into your neck, biting licking and sucking against your sweet spot.

you whined as you trembled against the two men. you felt hot.

"Fuck!" You shrieked, spasming when he gave you a slap against your sodden folds . " I—!"

" be careful girl." jungkook growled into your ear

you moaned apologies left right and centre as he continued to abuse your aching clit.

suddenly you were harshly pulled away from taehyung's hot wet muscle and pushed into the soft plush bed.

you whined in protest at your denied orgasm.

" now, you're going to choose. me or tae." jungkook questioned sadistically

" i...i can't choose that i okay um jungkook?" you said in a small voice.

" good decision honey, now lie back let me take care of you." he cooed kindly

taehyung scoffed as he sat back

you were more than happy like this, but when you shifted your hips to grind your centre against his, you both groaned open-mouthed into the kiss.

You could feel that he was already hard in his boxers. Knowing that his willing cock was so close to your needy core erased your mind of any thoughts that weren't of him.

When you dragged your clit against him again you keened, the pleasure incredible despite the barriers between you.

he felt so big as you continued your actions

suddenly you felt his large and literally massive cock push into your plush soppy cunt.

you moaned loudly as jungkook groaned.

taehyung smirked as he shook his head.

" get moving i wanna see her squirt."

jungkook rocked back and forth at a steady pace it was amazing don't get me wrong but you wanted more you needed more.

"more! more please harder jungkook please! " you begged.

" princess, don't beg for things you can't keep up with." he chuckled

there was an animalistic gaze in his eye as he started plunging into your pussy, taehyung mouth open jerking himself off at the sight, your open lie open as he ground his fat cock into you.

you felt hot and euphoric and couldn't help but let moans continuously fall out of your mouth.

suddenly you felt a harsh slap on your face. you felt tears well up in your eyes.

Without warning, his cock was rammed inside you. Raw and hard with the way your pussy was soaking wet from your denied orgasm , he began to relentlessly fuck into you.

tears began spilling out of your eyes continuously and your moans became pornographic.

as if he couldn't go any faster he began to drill inside you, your body shook in ecstasy as his fat cock was pistoned into you.

you felt your high approaching, you panicked and begged for them to let you come.

" please! please let me cum ! ill be good , ill be a good girl ! " you cried out towards them

jungkook craned himself to be face to face with you, as he stared at you with his dark and lustful. his wet lips capture yours into a sloppy kiss .

he forced your mouth open and let his tongue glide upon yours. he sucked on the wet muscle softly as you cried out.

everything felt so good, too good.

you came 3 times alone with jungkook and felt overstimulated beyond belief.

" now it's my turn . " taehyung dead panned

" w-what i can't take anymore ill just su- "

" i said. it's my turn. " he uttered in a harsh tone

you wailed in frustration as your body writhed in defeat .

" you're gonna take it . that's what you asked for . " he spat at you.

observing the way your eyes darken, turning neediness, and the way your chest heaves in short breaths, Taehyung’s jaw flexes.

He pressed the tip against your hole, seeing you tense up almost immediately. taehyung rubbed the end of his cock along your wet cunt before sinking himself into you.

" d-daddy ple- ! " you body spasmed against the head board as taehyung suddenly slammed his body into you continuously.

“ you’re such an eager little whore, aren’t you?” he purrs, condescension laced in his tone.

you tightly held onto the relentless man as you felt your high approaching once more.

taehyung’s thrusts became sloppy as he grunted against your neck.

you felt your body swirl and turn around you and you finally came.

hours later

you groggily woke up as you felt your body give out into the bed.

“ hel- hello? ” you said wearily

“ hi princess.” taehyung smirked

“ round 5?” jungkook asked

you sighed as you submitted to them in their bed

here we go again.

5 missed calls from jimin

[allegra-writes]

"Bad Together"

Part I: Contact

Peter Parker x Reader

Teen and up

Warnings: language, UST.

"Baby, I'm preying on you tonight

Hunt you down, eat you alive

Just like animals"

Animals - Maroon 5

“Hey kid! Rough night? You look like shit…” 

You sighed, turning away from your door to face your neighbour. Had it been anyone else, you would just have given them the finger and gotten inside your apartment. But not her. Not when she could have information for you.

“Gee, thanks Jess! You do know how to sweet talk a girl.” 

The seemingly -deceptively- fragile brunette’s eyeroll could have rivaled your own signature one, as she kicked away from the wall and crossed the hallway in your direction.

“As if sweet talking would work on you…”

Despite your exhaustion and bad mood, you managed to munster a small sad smile as your mind wandered unbidden to another time, to what felt like another life. 

And to a boy with warm brown eyes and even warmer skin. 

"You'd be surprised…"

Jessica raised a questioning eyebrow, but you just shook your head.

"I have your payment, if that's what you're looking for…"

You said, changing the subject. Her face fell, causing your heart to drop to your stomach. You knew that look. The regret in her green eyes, the pity. You knew what she was going to say even before she opened her mouth. It wasn't really surprising after all: fourteen months without any clues, without any new developments or witnesses? She wanted to drop the case.

"Listen, kid-" 

"No" you cut her off, your voice breaking no arguments, "whatever you're going to say, I won't accept it. I pay you, and you keep on looking for my sister. That's how this works. Let's not fuck this beautiful friendship of ours up." 

You added, only partly sarcastic. You were perfectly aware that, as closed off and damaged as you both were, you were probably the closest thing to a friend either of you had. 

And, for her part, Jessica knew that, if she didn't do the dirty work for you, you would be the one crawling up vents and climbing up balconies, sliding your way into seedy bars and even seedier alleys. You were stubborn like that. And truth be told, she had grown a little protective of you.

She pursed her lips, the wheels turning inside her head. 

"Well then," she finally proposed, "What about you pay me when I actually find something worth paying for?"

It took your drowsy brain a moment to process her words. You were ashamed of the moisture that found its way to your eyes, the knot in your throat that didn't allow you to let out anything more than a weak "Jessica" as a reply. But you were too worn out to be able to keep the emotions at bay. It had been too long since anyone had shown you that type of kindness, gratefulness was not something you were used to feeling. 

"I'm not giving up on the case," she promised, "but I'm not taking your money anymore. At least not until I deserve it."

She was telling the truth, you knew her enough to be able to tell that. If anything, she was going to work even harder to try and get the investigation moving.

"Thank you." 

You really meant it.

"Don't mention it” she shrugged, downplaying it, like every good deed she made. "Now get inside and get some sleep. You look dead." 

You did roll your eyes at that, missing her affectionate smirk as you disappeared through the door, muttering a laconic. "Yes, mom."

The darkness and quiet that greeted you inside your apartment felt like a soothing balm to your over stimulated mind, a much needed respite after your long, adrenaline filled evening. That was why you didn't even bother to turn the lights on as you let your backpack fall anywhere on the tile floor, stepping out of your sneakers and pulling your shirt over your head. 

The cold early morning breeze sent goosebumps along your skin, bringing your attention to the open window. 

You froze. You were always very careful not to let any windows open, Hell's Kitchen was a tough neighbourhood for a spoiled cat like your Selina to be out and about. 

A flash of movement at the corner of your eye was all you needed before your senses went haywire again, instinct kicking in as you jumped high in the air to twirl and land a kick to the back of whoever was in your apartment. But the intruder was expecting it, dodging just in time and turning around to block your punch. Getting a hold of your wrist, the dark figure twisted and pulled you forwards until you fell, back flushed against his chest as he wrapped his arms around yours in a vice-like grip, effectively immobilizing you.

"Easy there, Smokey." A way too familiar voice breathed against your ear, "you're going to hurt yourself." 

You stopped struggling against his grasp. Right. Of course it was him.

"Peter?"

His grip grew tighter for a moment, before letting go.

"Hello, Y/N."

Just like that, it all came back to you: The memories you had tried to repress, the feelings you had tried so hard to bury, washing over you like a flood, a tsunami hitting you hard enough to knock the breath out of your lungs once again. As you took an unsteady step away from him, you prayed that Peter hadn't noticed. 

"What are you doing here?"

"Nice place," Peter ignored your question, choosing to casually pace your living room instead. "Bit of a downgrade from the upper west side, though…"

"Fine," you scoffed, turning to him, "you wanna do small talk? Let's do small talk: what’s with the edgelord look?" You pointed at his tar-black suit. 

"Biotech," the suit retracted from his face and head, reminding you of the nanobots suit he used to wear before Dr. Octopus destroyed it. "Do you like it?" 

You shrugged,

"Stark industries?"

He shook his head. 

"Horizon Lab."

Well, that was interesting. You knew the little, independent company owned by one of his ex-girlfriends had helped him manufacture a couple of special suits developed from his very own webs, after his emancipation from the Starks. But you had no idea they had reached such level of refinement, and you had a feeling neither did Fury. 

"You like it?"

"You look… taller," You noted. That wasn't the only difference; his hair was longer, wilder, his shoulders wider, his arms far bigger than you recalled.

"You look exactly the same," he countered, as open as he had always been. "Just as beautiful as I remembered…"

You sighed, tiredly. You didn't have the energy for that — for his charm, his candidness. What was more, you weren't prepared at all. 

No, you weren't prepared for this Peter. Your Peter. Not after what all that Fury had told you…

"What do you want, Peter?"

He leveled you with a look, his whole demeanor changing in the blink of an eye. 

"I could ask you the exact same thing…"

"What do you mean?"

"Come on, Y/N. Don't play dumb with me, it doesn't suit you." His sudden bluntness surprised you, but it was more along the lines of what Fury had warned you to expect so it didn't completely manage to throw you off. 

You crossed your arms, "I have no idea what you're talking about." 

"Really, now?" Peter took a step forward, towering over you. "You don't? Hanging out at my spots, patrolling my neighbourhood, taking down my thugs?" He enumerated.

"Your thugs?"

"The kingpin is mine," he growled.

"Since when?"

"You fucking know since when!" You tried to hide your flinch at his rising tone, but he must have noticed because a moment later, he was closing his eyes and pinching the bridge of his nose, visibly trying to get a hold of himself. 

"I thought Queens was your neighbourhood…" You spoke, trying to diffuse the tension after a couple beats had passed without him moving.

"Yeah, well," he shrugged, opening his eyes, "I relocated."

"So did I…" 

"You did," he smiled. And just like that, he was back at being your Peter. "And you mean to tell me all of this." He pressed a button in his wrist, "isn't to get my attention?" 

A hologram version of Jade's video started to play in front of your impassive eyes. And you might have thought your carefully constructed mask of indifference gave away nothing, but Peter could see right through it. You didn't seem surprised to see the video and that alone was enough proof for him to confirm his theory. 

"Please, Smokey, security footage?" He smirked, "this isn't like you. You aren't this sloppy."

Another click and the video was gone.

"Well, this might come as a surprise to you, but everything isn't always about you." 

"Then what's going on?"

"None of your fucking business!"

Before you could react, the floor disappeared from under your feet, and your back hitted the wall with enough force to rattle the windows. 

"Like hell it isn't," Peter hissed, his weight pinning you upright. "Now tell me, what the fuck did you get yourself into this time?"

As you stared into his stormy eyes, heart racing inside your chest, unsure if the adrenaline coursing through your veins was because of the obvious threat in front of you, or for another reason entirely, you wondered exactly the same. 

Your tongue came out to moist your lips, Peter's dark pupils following the movement.

"It's been over a year," you breathed out, all the fight leaving you. It was too much, his sweet breath fanning over your face, every inch of his hard body pressed up against yours, overpowering you, the slick texture of his new suit against your bare chest… it was intoxicating. You had overestimated yourself. "Why do you even care?"

"I will always care about you," he confessed softly, just as affected by the closeness as you. "I will always want you…"

You closed your eyes, trying to get your erratic heart under control.

"Maybe I don't want you anymore, Peter." 

He pushed you harder against the wall, his forearm against your collarbone to prevent you from moving. 

"Don't do that," he whispered, lips ghosting over yours. "Don't torture me."

"Peter…"

BAM.

You fell to your knees, hard, Peter's body suddenly no longer supporting your weight. 

"Touch her again, and I'll kill you!"

"J-Jess?" 

"Hey, kid. You alright?" Your neighbour barely even spared you a glance over her shoulder as she placed herself between you and a newly irate looking Peter, slowly getting up from the rumble of splinters of wood and shards of glass that used to be your coffee table.

"What are you doing here?" You asked in confusion.

"I heard a noise," she deadpanned, eyes never leaving the dark cladded vigilante. But to your surprise Peter merely raised his hands in surrender, the bulk of his rage vanishing the moment he understood the woman in front of him was only trying to protect you. 

"This isn't what it looks like…" He tried to explain, but Jessica would have none of it.

"Yeah, sure" she scoffed. "Big guy, totally dressed, pinning a half naked girl to the wall in the dark... totally not rapey."

Peter flinched. She was right, he wouldn't believe himself either. 

"Listen, you're Jessica Jones, right?" Recognizing the woman in front of him, suddenly your choice in real state made a lot more sense. "I am- I was," he quickly corrected himself, "Peter Parker. Your friend, Matt Murdock, he knows me… look, I'm not- I'm not a bad guy." 

Even to his ears, he sounded unconvincing.

"Really?" Jess pointed at his black costume, "Cause you definitely look like a bad guy." 

"I… Y/n, help me out here," he threw you a pleading look but Jess moved to the side, blocking you from view.

"Hey, fuckface!" She snapped, drawing Peter's attention back to her, "the only reason I'm not kicking your ass right now is because of Matt. But if I ever see you next to Y/N ever again, I'll break every single bone of your body. Twice. Now get the fuck out of here, before I run out of fucking patience."

"Y/N?"

You sighed, getting up. Away from him, and with Jess there as a boofer between the both of you, you were no longer under the influence and could clearly see exactly how fucked up the situation was.

"I think you should leave, Peter." 

There was a flash of hurt in his eyes, but it was quickly replaced by a mask of indolence as he squared his jaw and turned away, letting the bio-suit close over his head again.

"I looked for her too, you know?" He admitted, before making his exit through the same window he had come in from.

You had no time to dwell on his words or anything of what had just happened, before Jess was on your face. 

"That was Peter? Your sister's boyfriend, the one you told me I didn't need to investigate?"

You resisted the urge to shrink under her look,

"Yeah…"

"You told me he was harmless. That did not look harmless!"

You couldn't really argue with that, so you didn't. Instead you gestured at her to be quiet, as you reached past her to pick up your phone, your landline phone, the one you had never bothered connecting. 

The one you knew was bugged.

With voice as clear and steady as you were able to manage, you spoke into the mic,

"Contact made. Awaiting further instructions." 

To be continued...

[qyuoza]

Coeur Brisé (SJH)

Genre: Fluff (only in the beginning), Angst

AU: nonidol!au, highschool!au

Warnings: This is honestly just really sad so like prepare for heartbreak, fem!reader loses feelings (i am so sorry in advance)

Summary: Junghwan and Y/n have always liked each other, so when the time came when they dated, Junghwan thought he could marry her, but Y/n had thought otherwise beacause, love really isn't meant to last.

Notes: In all honesty this was very hard to write since I cannot imagine Junghwan as a boyfriend like ever </3 hes like my baby

-

It was fall of 2020 when they met. Two bright souls at the age of fifteen, just at the start of puberty. Junghwan and Y/n, two teenagers who always adored each other, but were to afraid to admit their feelings for each other. Their friends would always try their luck for them to get together, but to no avail, until one particular day.

Junghwan and his friends were heading to the cafeteria together talking and laughing, all problems free from their minds, but as they passed by Y/n's classroom, Junghwan couldn't help but look at Y/n with her friends. He could see her in the middle of them all, her in her cute summer uniform with her hair tied in a ponytail and bangs draped over her face gently, she was so perfect. He snapped out of his daze and continued walking with his friends, Y/n's smile still replaying in his mind.

"Huh? What do you mean Mr. Woo isn't coming?" Junghwan asked, as he saw Y/n in the school dance practice room alone. "He asked me to meet him here but he hasn't been in an hour, so it's safe to say he really isn't coming" Y/n replied and turned towards him. They were both practical dance majors at SOPA, it only made sense if she knew. "Oh alright thank you for letting me know, see you around Y/n..." before Junghwan could turn to leave, she suddenly interrupted him. "WAIT— Could you come here for a second?" Y/n asked shyly, to which he felt his ears burn, but he nodded and approached her.

"Junghwan, I just wanted to tell you that...I really like you and that I've been too scared to tell you" Y/n then looked away, which left the boy shocked at the sudden confession. "Took you long enough" Junghwan laughed and Y/n looked up at the boy in curiosity. "I've always liked you too Y/n, safe for me to ask you out on a date then" he smiled, which sparked the beginning of their puppy love.

"Junghwan! Good morning!" Y/n greeted the boy as they met up at the train station. "Good morning, it's nice to see you so happy today" he flirted, meanwhile Y/n hit him playfully. "Junghwan you know I hate cheesy things like that" he laughed and before they knew it, the train had already arrived. "Alright sorry, but you look so pretty today, I honestly couldn't help it" Junghwan gave her a sweet smile and Y/n looked away trying to hide hers.

"Well aren't you two just adorable? You both remind me of when my husband and I were still teens back in the day" an old woman said from the seat beside them. "Thank you grandma, that's very sweet" Y/n said sweetly as Junghwan held her hand. "It's really nothing, I hope you both last long" the old woman said as Y/n nodded, turning to the boy and smiling. Junghwan felt his heart race, was he really falling in love all over again? "I love you" Y/n giggled, and for the first time in his life, Junghwan had found another purpose.

The circumstances are different now though, everything was changing for the couple. After a few months, the honeymoon stage was starting to wear off and things took a detour in their relationship. "Y/n do better next time" Junghwan sighed exasperated at the girl in front of him, Y/n had done the choreography wrong for the second time already. "Sorry..." she said quietly, but he just sighed and turned the music back on for them to redo the choreography. "I'm sorry for lashing out on you, here how about we go over it a few more times and we'll be done?" Y/n nodded as they both started the choreography again. The two weren't perfect, but they were in their first ever relationship and they had to understand each other bit by bit, even if it took time.

Later on, it wasn't just Junghwan, he still loved Y/n to bits, but it seemed that the girl was slowly detaching from the relationship, mostly emotionally but now physically. "Junghwan, is it alright if I eat with my girl friends for awhile?" she asked him, and he was shocked, the two always ate together with his friends and some of hers, but all of a sudden she just wanted to eat with just them now? "Oh that's fine, you have fun ok?" he smiled and Y/n nodded before walking off to her friends.

That same day, Junghwan had taken Y/n home as usual, but she was very quiet. "Hey, are you ok? You've been so quiet" he asked, and she shook her head. "I'm fine, just thinking" Y/n smiled and reassured Junghwan by holding his hand and giving it a squeeze. This seemed to calm him down a bit and he nodded in understanding.

A few weeks later, Y/n had already seemed to treat him as if he wasn't her boyfriend anymore, which left Junghwan dumbfounded. Not only that, he had overheard Y/n talking to her friends and it left him with an aching heart.

"Guys, I just don't think I have feelings for Junghwan anymore. He's a really sweet guy, but I guess the feelings were short lived. I don't deserve him..." Y/n said, then her friend hugged her. "Don't feel like that Y/n, it's normal for relationships not to last. Maybe it just wasn't meant to be you know?" Y/n nodded at her friend and wiped her tears, regaining her composure a bit. So she was losing feelings for him...

"Junghwan, can we talk?" The boy knew what was coming, so he nodded with a heavy heart, ready to hear out his soon to be ex girlfriend. "These past few months have been so fun with you, and you're so amazing Junghwan, I don't think I've said it enough, but...I don't think I can continue being with you" ah there it was, but Junghwan still continued listening. "I'm sorry, it's really not you, it's me...I never thought we would last and it was inevitable, but you don't deserve to be led on by someone like me. So please, let's break up" Y/n said, looking away from him. He sighed, and nodded, it was inevitable after all.

"Alright, whatever makes you happy Y/n. I hope that we both can continue to find the happiness we found in each other, in other people...Take care of yourself for me ok?" the girl nodded as they both went their separate ways. One with a heavy heart, the other with a burden finally off their shoulders.

Weeks later, it seemed like Y/n was happier than ever with a guy from the year above. Junghwan passed them as they both laughed and had bright smiles on their face, a contrast from when they were both dating, as they were both mostly too shy at first to even hold hands at first. "At least she's happy now..." he whispered and walked off.

© 2021 all rights reserved | rikiszn on tumblr.

[sebstanseabass]

Afterglow (A Bucky Barnes AU fan fiction) - Chapter 7

Afterglow chapters

Pairing: Bucky Barnes x reader

CHAPTER SEVEN

Lunch with Bucky was spent in a little Italian place right across the bar. It belonged to a seventy-year old Italian immigrant named Marco who invested in it with nothing but his savings when he first came to New York. Fifteen years later, his little dining place stood still through its ups and downs. In fact, business was getting stronger for Marco ever since the bar opened.  His target customers expanded from fellow immigrants to little boys who played soccer in the little league and finally to drunk bastards who wanted pizza in the middle of the night. He also started putting up a 24/7 sign and hired more people to work for him. Marco gave me a sympathetic smile as soon as he passed by you with a bottle of hot sauce he knew you liked.

"Where's the hunk?" His Italian accent never faltered. "Ditched ya?"

Lunch with Bucky was also cut short when he received a phone call from Leonard about an emergency in the White Wolf. "It's Leonard." He said. "Gotta get back to the hotel." Then you slipped in a tiny question, seeing a different phone on his hand: "Is that your phone? I thought you left it in your penthouse, that's why you crashed into our apartment."

"I borrowed Peter's old phone when we did our little fiancè act back there. Then I got my phone back after I ate all that food."

"And here you are again eating."

"Not anymore, I'm not." He chuckled, getting up from the chair and throwing his napkin gently on the table. "I gotta go, doll. Duty awaits. I'll see you around."

You were left there with two plates of pasta, one large pizza, and a hundred dollar bill that covered the whole meal. "Plus tip." Bucky then fled and hailed a cab. He gave you one last look and a small salute before getting inside then off he went.

"He had some business work to do." You replied. "Can I take these to-go please? Oh, and here." You handed Marco the hundred dollar bill and said something you have never said (not once!) in your entire life. "Keep the change."

Marco grinned, took the money and placed it inside his apron pockets. "Any chance you got four more of this?"

"Hey, that's with the tip already!" You playfully rolled your eyes and leaned back on the chair. "And you should ask the hunk that. Not me."

He started taking some plates off the table, his back a bit hunched as he did. "Who was that anyway? Finally replaced that old boyfriend of yours?"

"Old boyfriend? Marco, I'm single. Oh no, you're not at that stage now, are you?" It was meant as a joke but you did genuinely care for the old guy.

Marco stopped from picking up the plates and stood taller. "What ya talking 'bout?"

"You know," you whispered, "the forgetful stage."

"Oh fuck off." You earned a glare from him then continued to pick up the plates from the table before wiping it clean. A mother covered her three-year-old daughter's ears, with pasta noodles falling out of her mouth. She said something to Marco but was overpowered by his voice. A man in his 40's kept looking at you and Marco, probably wondering what the fuss was all about. "I'm still young!" He added. "And you know who I'm talking about. The guy you live with."

You scoffed and gave him an unbelievable look as you watched him clean, avoiding the stares people were starting to give. "That's not my boyfriend, Marco." You whispered.

"What? He's not?"

"He's my roommate." You took a sip of your bottled water. "We're roommates, nothing more."

"Well, good. I like the hunk better than that skinny roommate of yours." He bellowed laughing, holding his big, round belly. His voice echoed against the walls.

"Wait, so you thought Peter was my boyfriend this whole time?" You genuinely asked.

"Well, yeah! You were always together eating and whatnot. What was I supposed to think?"

You were supposed to argue with Marco that it was okay to be friends with someone of the opposite gender: to platonically hangout twenty-four seven, have pizza nights, movie nights, and all the things couples do but in a very platonic way. But Marco was an old man who stubbornly clung to his ancient beliefs. You didn't want to light a fire you and him. Besides, you were still on your way to earning his trust and getting a friend discount.

"Unbelievable." You mumbled, hoping he wouldn't hear it. Despite his old age, Marco still had the ears of a twenty-year old.

"You and me, both. All the time I was thinking to myself, you could do better!"

Oh, God. I know where this is going. You thought. "I'm not letting you set me up with your son, Marco."

"Why not?"

"Because he's old." You groaned, wishing he would just clear the table and just get it on with your to-go Italian food.

"So was that hunk you were with!"

Tired of all the back and forths, you sighed. "Marco, can't you just give me the food? I still have work to do."

"Yeah, yeah, aight. Don't nag me." Marco grunted. "You sounding like my ex-wife back there." His voice faded once he went back towards the counter, and started placing the food in the little to-go boxes.

Your phone on the table lit up. A text message from Peter asking you if you were still with Bucky. You replied back instantly that he went back to the White Wolf. You received no more messages from him after that.

A few seconds later, a figure approached and stopped right in front of you. You looked up and saw one of your friends who also did photography back in college.

"Wanda?"

Wanda flashed you that sweet smile of hers that reminded you of chocolates, rainbows, and unicorns.

"Aria! Wow, it's so nice to see you!" She crouched down to envelope you in a warm hug, then sat across from you, where Bucky was sitting a few minutes ago. She placed her small, shiny purse right on the table, her painted nails never letting it go. "I was just walking down the street and then saw you from the window. How are you? It's been quite long, huh?"

"Yeah, I'm doing good." Wanda could be such a Chatty Cathy. She was the kind of person that never let silence take over a room. If you memory served you right, you haven't seen each other since you graduated from college. She was a year younger than you and even though you stayed in New York the whole time, you never bothered to visit her at NYU Tisch during her last year. "How about you? How have you been doing?"

"I'm doing real good too! I actually set up my own studio a year ago in Manhattan after being a wedding photographer. I now photograph models, sometimes I do photowalks. I also hold photo exhibits from time to time." Unlike you, Wanda chose to follow her passion and majored in Photography and Imaging. "It's been really fun!"

Albeit feeling happy for her, a pang of jealousy struck you. You tried your best to ignore it and said: "That's great, Wanda. I'm so proud of you. You've come a long way since then."

She grinned. "I did, yeah. How about you? How's the business thing?"

You pursed your lips. "I'm actually juggling two jobs right now. I bartend at that bar over there," you pointed across the street, "and I also started a photography business." You continued. "I just do product photos for small businesses."

It was nothing big like Wanda's. Actually, it wasn't anything compared to her Manhattan studio and photowalks and photo exhibits. Nothing at all.

Her jaw dropped. Eyes wide. "Bartending? Wow! That doesn't sound like you at all!"

You chuckled then shook your head. "Who would've thought, huh? But it's pretty convenient and it pays half of my rent."

"You're still living with the Parker guy?"

"Actually, yes I still am." You replied. "But it's just the two of us now."

"Nothing more comforting than a familiar face around, huh?" She answered. "Oh hey, it's great you're still doing photography. I thought it was just a hobby of yours."

"I fell in love with it more during college, you know that."

Wanda just nodded her head in response then looked at her wrist watch. "Right. Well, this has been fun but I have a meeting to go to at some company who wants to talk about collaborations and stuff. You know the drill." She stood up from the chair, its legs scraping the wooden floors. "It was really nice to see you, Aria. I hope we can see each other again soon."

You mirrored her and stood up, reaching for a hug. "It's nice to see you too, Wanda." You let her go, then rambled. "I'm just in the bar if you ever wanna grab a drink or maybe coffee or lunch or anything, really."

"I will." She replied.

Before walking out, Wanda placed her hand on your shoulder, matched with a tight-lipped smile; like the gesture of someone towards a family member at one's funeral. Funnily enough, it was kind of appropriate. Your career in photography might as well be dead. You haven't received any work inquiry in over a month now, and some businesses have been rejecting your photography services. It was the classic "it's not you, it's me" scenario. They just found someone better.

With Wanda out of sight, you drained your thoughts and continued to stare at the moving cars on the streets. Getting you out of your trance was Marco tapping you on the shoulder.

"You alright there, kid?" He asked while handing you a plastic bag full.

"Yeah, sorry." You answered. "Just got distracted." You relieved him of your to-go food, grabbing it from his calloused hands.

"I know that kid you were talking to."

"Wanda?"

"Yeah, yeah. She photographed my son's wedding."

"The one you kept setting me up with?"

"Not that old bastard." He answered, frowning. "The younger, hotter one. With all the cheekbones and the eyes. Got them from me." Marco looked like a taller Danny DeVito. You doubted this "younger, hotter one" of his looked anything like Marco. "She also photographed my daughter's wedding."

"Jesus. How many children do you have?"

"Five." He chuckled. "I got some great swimmers."

You made a guttural sound and rolled your eyes. "Oh, God. Did not need to know that. Anyway, I gotta go. See you around, Marco." With that, you started to walk out and headed straight to the apartment.

There was nothing much to do once you got in the apartment besides putting the leftovers inside the fridge. The bar usually opened at four in the afternoon for happy hour so you took a short nap and was able to clear you head of all the things that happened overnight.

You woke up at about three in the afternoon and headed down the bar. By the time you got there, Nick was already inside, arranging the tables and chairs that were turned upside down.

"Hey, you got in early today." You greeted him as you approached the bar counter.

Nick looked up, hands still wrapped around a table. "Yeah well, I can't let you be employee of the month every single time."

"Living right above the bar does have some of its perks." You chuckled, grabbing an apron. "Need help with those?"

He answered no but his actions said otherwise. You jogged towards him and lifted the other side of the table, placing it on the floor without making much of a sound. You walked towards the other tables then started lifting one, praying to God you won't let it slip away from your arms but of course, you still had no luck on your side. Once Nick asked you that one question ("Do you want to go on a date with me?") you didn't want to hear, you dropped the table on your right foot. Bam! You stifled the sound of pain that itched your throat. Nick shuffled towards me and asked me if you were okay. You gently shrugged him off, telling him that it was nothing and that you you recently had a concussion less than twenty-four hours ago, this was absolutely nothing.

"You sure?" He asked. His hand gripped my waist, trying to maintain my balance.

"Yes, Nick." You straightened up and tried to stretch your right foot, checking if it was sprained or not. Thankfully, it was still good for running.

He let go of you then scratched the back of his head. His eyes focused on the wooden floors. "That was not a good time to ask that."

"I don't think there was ever a good time to ask that."

"Is that a no?"

Your mind recalled the conversation you and Peter had at the elevator: "Never dip the pen in company ink, right?"

Yes, it was easier to let him down easy with no one else around. You could also tell him you'll think about it but either way, you'd still be spending the remaining minutes in the bar with the fleeting awkwardness hanging in the air. But the silence was becoming heavier each second you weren't saying anything so you just shut your mind for a second and said: "Is it okay if I think about it first?"

"Yes. Sure. Of course!" He replied, finally meeting your eyes. "Just let me know. You know where to find me. Just here in the bar. 'Cause I work here."

"I know, Nick." You snickered. "I work here too."

"Right, right." He shook his head. "I'm just gonna..." He trailed off, pointing to the tables with his thumb.

"Yeah, I'll just..." You didn't know where else to go so you just made up an excuse. "I'll just be in the kitchen."

"What are you gonna do there?"

"I think there are still some shipments there? From earlier?" Lie. "I'll take care of them. Don't worry."

"O-okay."

And with that, you left Nick arranging tables and chairs while you headed towards the kitchen, sat on the floor and scrolled through different social media platforms before one of the cooks entered the kitchen. You ignored the befuddled look she gave you. It was the sign to  stand up and walk out of the kitchen. So you did.

Once Peter walked in the doors, you grabbed a bottle of beer and removed the bottle cap. You greeted him with a smile and placed his drink on the counter. "Hey, Parker. Guess what?"

"Hey, y/n." He smiled, sitting on the stool and placing his briefcase on the counter. He immediately grabbed the beer bottle and took his first sip. "Nick finally asked you out?"

"You don't know the rules to the 'Guess What' game, do you?"

"Oh, I know the rules." He replied. "I'm just a born rule breaker. So," he stared at his beer bottle scratching the sticker with his thumbs, "did you say yes?"

"I told him I'll think about it."

"And you've thought about it?"

"Yes."

"...and?"

"I'm gonna tell him no." You walked away from Peter, pouring beer from the beer tap into a beer mug for one of the regulars who just walked in. "It's kind of hard to work with someone you're dating or you've dated. I mean, you learned that the hard way, right?"

Peter groaned, reminiscing the time he dated his co-worker, a certain Denise, for six months, stringing her along for a couple more before dumping her. He couldn't even begin to describe how much hatred Denise had for Peter. One night, you found Peter on the rooftop, writing his resignation letter. Of course, you had to throw it after sneaking up on him behind his back. Apparently, Peter couldn't take any more of Denise's death stares during meetings, lunch breaks, and any time she was around Peter. Luckily, Denise got fired the next day for some legal dispute. Peter drank his whole night away that very day and you ended up taking care of him. The next day, you told him everything he'd done that night except one thing: trying to kiss you.

"Hey," Peter hissed, "here he comes. Good luck." He swiftly left his briefcase and beer bottle on the counter, hurrying his way towards the toilet.

You gave Nick a small smile once he opened the counter pass-through. "Nick. Hi."

"Y/n. Hi!"

"So, about the thing earlier -- "

"Can I get a beer?" Interrupted a man on your left side but you couldn't care less. You put up your hand in front of his face. "In a mug!"

Before you could even say "I'm sorry, Nick, but I can't date a co-worker. It's just not right. But you're great. Not just with me" the man shooed your hand away. "Hey! The hell is this?"

You groaned. "You'll get your beer in just one moment, okay?"

The man huffed and left the counter then sat on a nearby table, flipping me off. You rolled your eyes at him and brought your attention back to Nick who was still waiting for your answer. While halfway through your short speech you have been preparing in your head, he interrupted with a: "Yeah, yeah, I know where this is going. It's fine. It's alright. I understand. I'll let you get back to work."

He started turning around but you immediately stopped him. "So this is okay, right? No weird tension between us, or something like that?"

He nodded his head and sent you a warm smile. "Yeah, everything's good. At least I tried, y'know. I'll, uh, see ya around 'cause y'know -- "

"You work here, yeah."

"Yeah. Well... " And with that, he treaded away towards the pass-through and approached some newcomers.

The man from earlier was still staring at you so you went ahead and opened the beer tap. Before the liquid even reached the top of the mug, a hand laid on top of the tap handle and turned the tap off.

"Now," Bucky's voice rang inside your ears, "how about you make me a mean drink, doll?"

[ironmandeficiency]

rain clouds

pairing: maxwell lord / reader

word count: 2813

summary: i don’t even know what to say abt this one except it’s filled with yearning

a/n: this was gonna be super soft and happy but then it got soft and sad and then soft and happy again. posting from mobile yet again. tbh idek if this makes a lick of sense, we will see

warnings: mentions of shitty parents (maxwell’s dad & alistair’s mom), hints at child neglect & cps, anxious max, don't worry it gets fluffy

maxwell lord hasn’t had a day off since he founded black gold cooperative. that business was his baby long before he had a living baby with his ex wife, and loved both just as much. there was no such thing as a “sick day” to max; any day spent sleeping or healing is a day lost in the pursuit of greatness, the pilgrimage to the top of the corporate food chain. the only one he would ever make an exception for is alistair, and even then work would sometimes interrupt.

there was a time, almost too long ago for him to vividly remember, where maxwell did more than work. when he actually got his hands dirty in something that didn’t have anything to do with corporate schemes, and laughed with genuine glee more often than scowled. it was a long time ago now, and no one would ever believe it if they were told that maxwell lord ever got dirty with, well, dirt.

“come on! you gotta try this, it’s great!” the memories of his only friend have become worn with constant reminiscing, his mind unsure as to what’s real and what he imagined to fill in the gaps left by age and new priorities.

maxwell had found a secluded section of the park down the street from the apartment you both lived in, one safe from the eyes of bullies and adults alike. his feet were bare as the day he was born while making leaps and bounds in the abundant mud puddles from yesterday’s rain. he did his best to not let what little joy he found be dwindled by circumstance — his shitty father and reticent mother and the lingering ghost of poverty — the way others lost theirs. max believed himself different than that and carried himself as such no matter what others said.

you were still on the sidewalk, watching your best friend with awe and curiosity. the idea of traipsing through mud barefooted was exhilarating, but you knew that if your clothes got dirty, your mother would hang you out to dry alongside the clothes you were wearing. how did it feel to have the mud between your toes, the rainwater soaking into your skin? you didn’t remember, but you would like to.

to be honest, maxwell didn’t expect you to join him. he didn’t think you would ever try to break out of the box of propriety your family shoved you in, not now or ever. but the next thing he knew, he heard another set of feet splashing around in the puddles he had just vacated, making a path to where he stood. a playful shriek he knew as yours rang through the air and he immediately turned to you, wanting to see your face as you enjoyed yourself for the first time in a long time. “maxwell, this is wonderful! why didn’t you get me to do this earlier?”

you never looked more beautiful to him than when the afternoon sun shone on you, your smile bright and laughter clear and joyous. you were free as lady liberty, splashing around like there wasn’t a single other thing you had to do. then you take his hand and max swears that he’s seeing stars. before you know it, you’re dancing in the mud to the song of the birds in the trees. is it just max’s imagination, or do you tell him you love him?

your lips are on his and it’s magic. his shirt is being gripped in tight fists and his hands are magnetized to your waist, holding each other tight enough to need a crowbar to separate you. there’s nowhere he would rather be than back there with you…

but it’s been far too many years since he’s seen or heard from you, there’s no telling if you’re even in the country still at this point. it took a long time for him to not dolefully gaze at every door you could walk through once he left for college, hoping to see that radiant smile and hear you say his name so reverently.

but these days, reverence is the last thing maxwell thinks he deserves, not after the dreamstone debacle. hell, he isn’t even completely convinced that he can adequately take care of alistair despite the low standards his father and his ex-wife have presented him with. despite these doubts (and the perplexing way that everyone acted as if he never almost took over the world), he was just given full custody of alistair when the school called cps on his ex-wife for neglect. it was a terrible way to get a second chance at doing right by his son, but it’s a second chance nonetheless.

after seeing sense and liquidating black gold while he still could get something to survive with, he and alistair found a two bedroom apartment in a nice part of town. it was miniscule compared to what he had but it was a sight more than what he could have ended up with. besides, max had no time to be frivolous when he had his son to protect.

back to the grindstone he went. he knew that people would recognize him if he kept his current appearance and name, so he retired the lord name and decided on another fresh start. he slowly adjusted to using lorenzano after so many years rejecting it, got the blond removed from his hair. he found a job in financial advisory, and ironically enough, he was damn good at it. he knows what he’s doing when it comes to money that isn’t his, who’d have thought?

he actually knew a couple people from work that he almost considered friends. honestly he wasn’t sure what that word meant anymore, didn’t remember the feelings that were supposed to be associated with having them. but it was enough, truly more than enough; because this progress meant that he was dragging himself out of the grave he dug, because he was taking care of his son first and foremost.

alistair was put into a new school; nothing fancy, just the nicer public school that was a pleasing midpoint between work and their apartment. the first day he attended, alistair came home with so many good stories about the friends he made and the games they played at recess. within a few months he had been contacted by his teacher who had nothing but praise for little alistair lorenzano. his little boy was excelling and max couldn’t have been more proud than he was during that phone call. seconds after he hung up, he found alistair in his bedroom and wrapped him in a massive hug, making sure to emphasize the fact that max was proud of his son.

and then there was his neighbor. they lived across the hall from him and max would only catch the tail end of their arrivals and departures to their apartment. he did think it was rather odd, their strangely adept ability at avoiding him. if he didn’t know any better he’d think it was on purpose.

it wasn't intentional — not quite.

you had been avoiding your neighbor, but it had nothing to do with the oil commercials or dreamstone debacle — your new neighbor made you sad. the feeling would hit every time you saw him. his mere presence dusted off long-worn and cherished memories of a time where the sun felt warmer on your skin, where smiles came easier than heartache.

it took a long while before you realized why: it was because this mystery man reminded you of a love long lost to the dagger of circumstance. something about his walk, or maybe his hands during the times you’d see him open his apartment door, reminded you of what an older maxwell lorenzano could have been. the section of your heart that housed your thoughts of maxwell had been wrapped in caution tape with every hazard sign known to man flashing around it for many years, not wanting to venture there for more than a few moments in fear of hurting yourself even more.

if only you realized it was really max that you were so adamantly avoiding.

three months went by of max wondering why he still has yet to meet his neighbor. not that it was imperative to his daily survival, but his curiosity was all but tearing him apart at the seams. he didn’t know what else to do; yes he wanted to know his neighbor, but how did he go about that when they never saw each other?

“just knock on their door, daddy. be their friend, like you tell me to do when i go to school.” the childlike innocence alistair speaks with betrays the actual feasibility of the idea. maxwell was overthinking everything! people talked to their neighbors all the time! this could just be a simple “hey are you doing okay?” and the chips would fall where they may.

maxwell ruffles his son’s hair affectionately, pulling him into a small hug. “you know what? that’s exactly what i’m gonna do. thanks buddy, i’ll be right back.” it’s only across the hall, max isn’t gonna be gone long.

it’s been years since he’s done anything this casually daring. everything he did for decades was all high risk yielding high reward. talking to his neighbor should seem simple in comparison — it presented no drastic consequence if it went belly up, he almost never saw his neighbor anyway. that wouldn’t change after he finally sated his curiosity, certainly not.

once alistair’s homework is finished and is entranced by the television, maxwell decides to head next door, being sure that the house keys are in his pocket before shutting the door. he probably should have thought it out more than he did — he had no idea about his neighbor’s work schedule or if they had kids or a spouse, if they were a serial killer or an introvert. or even worse, if they happened to be someone who remembers everything he’s done. that would be his luck, his first true attempt at making a friend being thwarted with the magnitude of his past sins.

he doesn’t hear his own front door open, alistair’s head poking out to watch his dad. “knock, daddy!” he whisper-shouts and nearly shakes maxwell out of his skin. the little boy laughs at his dad’s startled expression before nodding and shutting the door back.

max went to knock but realized with his knuckles only an inch from the wood that his hands were peculiarly slippery. when did maxwell’s hands get so clammy? there was nothing to be nervous about. he was just going to attempt to make a friend, like his son simplified.

but the thing is, maxwell knows that it’s been decades since he’s had a friend. the last time someone outside of his son was kind to him not for the zeroes he wrote in checkbooks was you, and sometimes he even doubted that you were real. there are hazy memories of him as a teen that splashed in mud puddles and kissed a being of pure sunshine with the innocence of youth. he hopes they’re real, for his sake and for the sunshine he romped around the park with. maybe memories of him are keeping you sane the way your memory did for him.

as his thoughts spiraled, maxwell lost his nerve. with a heaping dose of irrationality, he didn’t want to disappoint whoever was on the other side of the door. turns out, there was no one on the other side.

“excuse me, did you need something?”

your first instinct when seeing a man almost knocking on your apartment door, on a normal day, was not to be so polite. but you were having a strangely good day and there was no reason to bring down the positive energy with an abrasive attitude. plus, the man looked so conflicted. he seemed to need a friend.

“i, uh, live across the hall, have been for a few months and never got to meet you.” a small gesture to the side shifted your attention to the door across from yours — and the little boy who had the door cracked just enough to see the interaction between you and who you think must be his dad.

this man’s voice, something about it was familiar. he moved from in front of your door and extended his hand towards you in an effort for a decent introduction. “i’m maxwell lor-lorenzano.”

maxwell lorenzano. you never would have thought that out of all the people to have graced this apartment building, he would be one. his hands were still softly strong and shoulders still broad. his eyes were still the same striking shade of brown, but there was a lot more pain there, a lot of experience that was clearly pushing him down by his shoulders and into the depths of anguish. yet there he was, keeping his head above water and still being kind. this truly was your max.

you take his hand with a soft smile, squeezing it gently as you give your name. “it’s been a long time, max.”

max couldn’t believe it. after all these years, it was you.

you had moved in across the street from him in his early teenage years and had become acquainted when walking to school and home. the two of you trekked through high school together, ignoring the cruelty of classmates and focusing on getting to the future, to freedom. hope of being friends after high school was abundant in the beginning, but soon your paths sent you further and further away from each other and towards a future neither of you were sure you wanted without the other.

“it really has been a while. i- i uh,” he could barely string a sentence together anymore. his shock and joy of seeing you again had his brain melting into goo and his tongue an almost immovable weight. “i missed you.” the blood rushed to your face the way it always did when you were with max. even when stuttering over his words and a hand rubbing at the back of his neck, he was still charming.

max noticed your attire and the wet umbrella in hand and was immediately taken back to that day spent in the park after it rained, when he . the sunshine on his skin, your smile that never failed to take his breath away…

a soft smile was on max’s lips but his eyes were somewhere else. “max? is everything okay?”

“do you remember the day we went to the park, when we splashed in the puddles and-“

“and when i kissed you? i could never forget if i tried.”

you really did kiss him! it made him want to do it again, as many times as you would let him. but that brought one little stipulation with it: alistair.

what would you say when you found out he had a son?

before max’s thoughts could dampen your reunion, you continued, and with every word, you solidified your place in his heart. “maybe we could do that again some time, just like we used to. and you could bring your son too, if you’d like.” you were jumping out on a limb by assuming that the little boy was his son, but with the apparent protectiveness max displayed around him when you see them together, what else could he be?

“that sounds so fun! can we, dad?” alistair made his presence known by pummeling into max’s legs, nearly knocking him over with an excited hug. you grinned at the affection, watching max’s eyes fill with warmth as he gazed at his son. “i don’t see why not. just change into some play clothes and get your raincoat from the hall closet.”

alistair shoots with glee and is immediately running back to the apartment, excited to change clothes and play in the rain. you watch max’s eyes as they light up at alistair’s happiness, that flicker reminding of you of when you were younger and the world was kinder to you both.

here was your second chance with max, another opportunity to be with someone who never stopped loving you even as the seasons changed and the zeroes increased. “i’ll let you guys get changed, come knock when you’re ready to go.”

feeling an uptick in bravery, max placed a quick peck to your cheek before he turned toward his apartment. “will do, see you in a few.” the risk he took was well worth seeing you grow bashful at the affection, eyes flitting to your shoes before back at him, a soft smile across your lips. you watched him walk away before going back into your apartment, waiting for the rest of your life to begin at the rapping of knuckles on solid oak.

maxwell lord taglist & others: @phoenixhalliwell @likeshootingstarsinthenightsky @obirain @themarcusmoreno @captainrexstan @battletales @stardustsunrisekisses @senator-nahberries @max--phillips @jedi-mando @veracruz-djarin @andysficrecs @purelypascal @whovianwar @iv7867 @kaermorons @princess76179 @pedropasscals

[mrsalwayswrite]

To Call Forth Love- Chapter 4

So I planned for this chapter and the next to originally be one but as I started writing it, the words kept flowing and oops....now its really long. So I decided to split it. This means that I’m pretty much done with the next chapter so I’ll be able to get it out in a few days! Yay!

Also, Ivar is pretty manipulative in this chapter. Someone made a comment in the last chapter that I want to acknowledge. Going forward this is kind of a theme but I just want to put that warning statement- if this is triggering for you, please read with caution. There is nothing explicit or graphic but its still manipulation. 

Words:4000

Warnings: swearing, manipulation

Tag List: @youbloodymadgenius​

Series Masterlist

Sitting in the office at work, Kari sipped on her smoothie as she plugged in numbers for an inventory order. She had just finished teaching one of her morning classes and was now doing some paperwork for Lydia while on her "lunch break". 

 She jumped when her phone suddenly buzzed- a text alert. Surprised and curious as to who would be texting her at this time, she unlocked her phone to see the text from an unknown number. 

 Unknown: hey u busy 2nite?

 Kari: who is this?

 Unknown: u fav person

 Kari: OMG! Ed Sheeran?!

 She giggled quietly to herself, returning back to the laptop screen. Normally she ignored any calls or texts from unknown numbers, but it had been a good morning and she was feeling playful. When there was no return text, she shrugged the conversation off and returned to the order. Apparently, the unknown number did not get the reaction they were hoping for or realized they text the wrong person. Either way, she did not care. 

 A couple minutes later, her phone started to vibrate repeatedly. Looking down, she saw she was getting a call from the unknown number. She hesitated to answer, but by the third ring her curiosity got the better of her and she answered it. 

 "Hello?"

 "FUCKING ED SHEERAN? REALLY?"

 She sat there stunned. "Ivar?"

 "Of course, it's me. Who the fuck were you expecting?" He asked, angrily. 

 "How did you get my number?"

 He ignored her question, his voice suddenly sounding muffled. "Yeah, yeah, I'll be a second…. damn it. I know!"

 "Who is that?" 

 "My brother.” He scoffed, muttering something unintelligible under his breath, before speaking to her again. “I have to head back into a meeting now."

 "Oh, ok?"

 "You didn't answer my question."

 Her mind was still reeling from the fact that Ivar Lothbrok had her number and was calling her out of the blue. "What question?"

 He huffed, exasperation evident in his tone. "Are you busy tonight?"

 "Why?"

 "I want to take you out."

 "Ivar," she sighed, pressing a hand to her forehead, "I told you, I can't."

 "Yeah and I don't believe you, so…."

 "No. I'm sorry but the answer is still no."

 "Fine. I have to go." He snapped then abruptly ended the call.  

 Slowly, she pulled the phone away from her ear and stared at it. What just happened? Before she forgot, she added his number to her contacts since she had the distinct feeling this would not be the last time he contacted her. Once done, she set her phone down and dropped her head into her hands. 

 It had been two days since he drove her home and she said they could be friends. In those two days, this was the first contact they had. She had hoped he grew bored with her since she was not playing his game, that she refused to go out with him. Maybe he finally decided she was not worth his time and moved on? Which was for the best. She could never fit into his world, there was no space for her there. Nor did she want to. She was happy, content with her life. 

 It was better for her to not allow Ivar into her life. That's what she repeated to herself as she tried to focus on the inventory order. 

 *****

 "Just put the bags right there, thank you." Kari said, placing the grocery bags, one in each hand, onto the tiled floor. The kitchen in her townhouse was small, two people could barely move around in it without bumping into one another. Thankfully, she did not spend much time in the kitchen. Cooking had never been her forte. 

 "Do you need anything else? I don't mind staying to help." The dirty-blond haired man asked, setting the two bags he carried down onto the floor. He started to shuffle forward but seemed to think better of it and leaned against the half-wall separating the kitchen from the short hallway. 

 "Erik, it's fine. If anything, I owe you. You never let me pay for gas money."

 He shrugged, and tucked his hands into the front pockets of his jeans. "It's not a big deal. I needed to shop too."

 "Still, it's not fair to you." She turned around from placing the milk in the fridge to look at him. 

 "If I think of something you can do to repay me, I'll let you know. Deal?"

 "Perfect."

 "Do you still want a ride to work tomorrow?"

 She shut the door and jokingly waved a hand at him. "See! You're too nice."

 "I'd be ‘too nice’ if I also showed up with coffee for you."

 She laughed, moving some frozen fruit into the freezer. "You're too perfect to not have a girlfriend." 

 He rubbed the back of his neck, a flush growing on his cheeks and drawing out a boyish smile. "I don't know if I'd say that. I'll let you get to it. I'll meet you outside at nine?"

 "Thank you, Erik."

 "Of course." He popped his head around the wall to look into the living room. "See you, Alana!"

 "Bye, Erik!" The response came from the living room. 

 Kari continued to put her groceries away as she heard the front door click shut behind him. Somehow, she needed to figure out a way to pay him back. 

 Erik lived in the townhouse next door alone. When he learned that Kari did not own a car, he offered to give her rides whenever it worked out for both of their schedules. At first, she had been hesitant, still not having lived in the townhouse for long but eventually gave in because he always acted like such a gentleman. Every time he saw her, he made sure to greet her and ask about her day. He always held the door open for her and anybody else close by. A negative word never passed his lips, rather choosing to focus on the positive in life. A routine soon started to form and every two weeks they would meet up outside of their townhouses and go grocery shopping together. When she did not have to work early, he would occasionally give her rides to work since the bank he worked at was only a couple blocks away. That was the extent of their interactions though. She wondered about inviting him over for dinner as to thank him but she always chickened out in asking him. Perhaps that was what she needed to do after all.  

 Once all her groceries were put away, she headed into the living room, seeing her roommate and friend sitting on the couch with the TV on to the Great British Bake-off but looking down at her phone. 

 The brunette asked, dropping onto the second couch. "How was work?"

 "Good. You?" Alana looked up, her make-up flawless like usual on her delicate features. 

 "Nothing too exciting."

 "You know, if you'd waited two hours I could have taken you to the store."

 Kari nodded, fiddling with her diamond stud earring. "I know, but you're so busy with work and school. I know you like relaxing when you come home and Erik said he was free today."

 "Did he now?" Alana asked with a smug look.

 Kari tossed a throw pillow at her. "Don't start this again."

 The blonde caught the pillow, still grinning like the Cheshire cat. "You know he likes you. He's just too shy to ask you out."

 "He's a friend, it's been like seven months, I think if he was going to ask me out, he would have done it by now."

 "He. Is. Shy." Alana enunciated, as if talking to a child. She rolled her blue eyes, leaning back against the couch. "Shit, he only started to actually talk to me this summer."

 "Cause you are intimidating."

 Alana threw the pillow back at Kari. "Bitch, it's cause I radiate sexiness and he can't handle it."

 "That is most definitely it." 

 "Well the guy I hooked up with last weekend said I radiated sexiness."

 Kari wrinkled her nose, looking over at her roommate. "I don't want to hear that. It's bad enough when you bring them here."

 "You know, it wouldn't be the worst thing for you to actually go out with Erik. He's…. sweet." She quietly stated, eyes back on the TV. 

 "Yeah."

 "I'm fairly sure he'd treat you better than that fucker of ex."

 Kari picked invisible lint off her black leggings, apprehensive about where the topic was going. Her love life, and lack of it, was something Alana liked to remind her of frequently as of late. "Honestly, I'm even sure anymore he should count as an ex."

 "Well you were supposed to be exclusive, right? And then you find out he's been fucking other girls the whole time. That counts as a shitty ex."

 She winced at the reminder of her one attempt at dating. "I don't…. I don't think I'm ready."

 The blonde pointed a finger at her roommate without turning her eyes away from the TV. "Well don't wait around forever, you'll miss out."

 "Says the woman who hooks up with a different guy almost every other weekend."

 "And I'm not missing out!"

 Kari laughed. Feeling her phone vibrate, she pulled it out of her pocket and checked it to see a new text from Ivar. 

 Ivar: hell no, if we r gng 2 see the Northern Lights thn we're gng 2 Iceland or Norway.

 She smiled at the text, quickly typing in a reply. 

 Kari: fine, we'll add that to the list. Can I please put South Africa back on the list?

 She fiddled with her diamond stud earrings, looking back at their conversation throughout the day. Just looking at all the texts, she bit her lip to try and contain the smile. 

 Ivar had texted her in the late morning, asking her out again. To which she just texted back a one-word answer- "no". Apparently undeterred, he ignored her 'no', saying how he wanted to take her to this popular restaurant. Somehow the conversation spiraled into creating overly outrageous "dates" he would take her on, each one more fantastic than the last, with her encouraging and creating her own ideas. Their texting had lasted all day, and she found herself actually looking forward to his responses. Something she never would have expected, especially after how rudely he hung up on her the prior day. 

 So far her favorite "date" involved him renting out the entire Roman Colosseum in Rome and having a candlelight dinner in the middle of the arena. The most amusing one was when she suggested they go skydiving. He shut down that idea saying they would have to be strapped to instructors and the only man she should ever be strapped to was him. 

 Her phone vibrated in her hand, alerting her to his response. 

 Ivar: u r not swimming w/ sharks 

 She giggled, trying to imagine his facial expression. She actually had no desire to do half of the stuff she suggested but it was funny to get a rise out of him. 

 Kari: African safari?

 "What are you giggling at?" Alana questioned, giving her the side-eye. 

 The smile dropped from her face. "Nothing."

 "That doesn't sound like nothing."

 "Just a funny meme." She deflected, getting to her feet. There was no way she could tell Alana she had been texting Ivar all day. "I'm going to shower."

 As she headed upstairs to her room, her phone vibrated again. 

 Ivar: do u jus luv danger?

 Kari: I'm talking to you, aren't I? 

 She headed to her bathroom, turning the shower on and checking the temperature. In a spur of the moment decision, she tossed in a eucalyptus shower bomb. 

 Just before she jumped in, she looked at her phone one last time to find his response.  

 Ivar: touche, kitten, touche 😘

 *****

 The soothing soundtrack of nature played over the speakers in the yoga studio room. A few women were already in the studio with their yoga mats out, either stretching or quietly conversing as they waited. Depending on the day, the ten am morning class could be busy but typically it averaged about fifteen to twenty women.

 Kari bent over, touching her palms to the floor. Even though she would not be continuously doing the routine along with those in her class, she still liked to be limber and have her muscles warmed up. This was a beginner class, where she spent a good portion of the time either correcting people's forms or showing how to do a certain pose. A few of her coworkers complained about teaching beginner classes since when the participants walked through the door, you never really knew what level they were at. 

 Checking the clock hanging over the door, she saw she had five minutes before her class started. She closed her eyes and took a deep breath, enjoying the pull of her muscles. The door to the studio room opened but Kari continued to stretch, shifting to a downward facing dog pose, holding it. She could hear some people moving around but she focused on her breathing.  

 "Mmm, I could get used to seeing this."

 The familiar voice behind her, caused Kari to try and whip around in startled surprise, only to end up crashing onto her ass. 

 Above her stood Ivar with a devilish smile. "Hello, kitten." He softly said with smolder that instantly made her flush and a tendril of warmth curl in her belly. Standing there in his jeans and red shirt with his hair pulled back in a man bun, it was unfair how striking he looked. Even the braces over his legs did nothing to deter from his attractiveness. 

 She rose quickly to her feet, wiping her hands over her leggings and peeking at the others in the room. Most were curiously watching their interaction but remained where they were. 

 "What are you doing here?" She hissed, turning her gaze back up to meet his. "How did you find me?"

 He rolled his eyes. "You were wearing a Whole Wellness Yoga Studio shirt when I drove you home last week. Plus, hearing from Gyda that you work here…. You're not that hard to find."

 That made sense, even if she disliked the logic. "Ok, fine. Why are you here though?"

 "I want to take you out tonight."

 "Oh gods." She could not believe what she was hearing. The prior day they had spent most of the day texting and sure it was fun, but her answer had not changed. When he had not text her this morning, she assumed that was the last she had heard from him. Apparently, he decided to ask her out in person instead of over the phone like the past two times. "Ivar… No."

 "Why? You keep saying you can't but never why."

 "It's just…. look, I don't want to date."

 He took a step closer, face inches above hers. His voice dropped low, an underlying current of anger in his tone. Those piercing blue eyes challenged her. "You say that but I don't think that's the real reason. So, until you tell me the truth, your 'no' means fucking nothing. Friends tell each other things, right?"

 "You know, I don't think we should be friends anymore."

 He chuckled, still standing too close for a normal conversation. "Too late. I like you."

 "I'm still not going out with you." She placed her hands on her hips, trying to appear confident, hoping desperately he did not hear the wavering in her voice. 'This was for the best, it was best for both of them' she repeated in her mind. 

 "Fine. I'll wait for you to change your mind." He winked and stepped back. To her horror, she watched as he walked over to the side of the room where she kept her water bottle and light jacket. He grabbed a nearby chair and dragged it over before dropping down with his legs in a manspread, that stupid smirk still on his face. 

 She stomped over to him, whisper-shouting at him. "What are you doing?"

 "I'm waiting."

 "What?"

 "I'm not leaving until you agree to go on a date with me."

 "You can't...no…. Ivar." She whined. 

 "I walked all the way here to see you, even though my legs are quite painful today…. you wouldn't kick a cripple out when they just need to rest, would you?" He asked, eyes widened in mock innocence. One of his hands rubbed at his knee in exaggerated fashion as if to prove the discomfort he was in. 

 She groaned. "I hate you."

 "No, you don't." He gloated, then nodded towards the clock. "It's ten o'clock, it's time to start your class, I believe."

 Without another word, she moved to the front of the room. She refused to play this game. Her answer was 'no' and no matter what he said or did, her answer would not change. The whole time she could feel his rakish gaze on her, reminding her how tight her leggings and purple tank top were. She tried to focus on her class, smiling at the women she recognized and the ones that she assumed was new. "Let's begin. Everyone start in mountain pose. Take deep breaths, let's center ourselves."

 "Kari!" 

 She looked over at the older woman, Ingrid, who called out. The woman was easily one of Kari's favorites, doting upon those who worked at the yoga studio, and becoming the unofficial grandmother of them. Ingrid had been coming to the yoga studio for years but was forced to only take beginner level classes after a bad fall the prior year. She loudly complained about her doctor being an idiot and how she felt fine, but Lydia refused to let her attend any other class than beginner classes until otherwise said by her doctor. 

 "Yes?"

 Ingrid's hazel eyes twinkled with mischief from the front row where she stood. "You planning on introducing that handsome young man you've got over there?"

 "No, we are going to ignore his presence. He's going to be leaving soon." Kari flatly stated with a polite smile.

 "Hi! I'm Ivar!" He announced with a charming smile, his bright blue eyes alluring under the dim lights. Giving a little wave with his fingers, he continued, "I hope my presence doesn't bother all you lovely women, I just came to see my girlfriend and ask her on a date tonight."

 A chorus of "awwwws" filled the room. 

 Kari wanted nothing more than to bang her head against a wall. Or preferably, Ivar's head. She could not believe the audacity of him.

 "Where are you taking her?" One of the newer women asked in a flirty tone, pulling her shoulders back to emphasize her ample chest. 

 Ivar barely glanced at her, keeping his focus on Kari. "It's a surprise. I wanted to do something special."

 "Young man, if I were a few years younger, I would fight Kari here so you could take me on a date." Ingrid said with a laugh. 

 "I would be honored to take a lovely woman like you on a date." He sent a playful wink to Ingrid. 

 "Alright, let's get back to yoga." Kari tried to redirect the attention. Annoyed and upset did not even begin to describe how she felt. 

 "Well it was lovely to meet you, young man. Kari should have told us her boyfriend was so handsome. We might have convinced her to bring you in sooner for some eye candy." Ingrid teased. 

 "He's not my boyfriend." Kari retorted, shooting a glare at the smug raven-haired man. 

 "And that is why I'm trying to take her on a date." He placed a hand dramatically over his heart, eyes staring at her beseechingly. "Just for her to give me a chance."

 "Get her some tulips. Those are her favorite flowers." Karina called out from the back of the room. 

 "Can't go wrong with chocolate!"

 "Oh! Read her a sonnet and dance under the stars together!"

 "This is so romantic…. like something out of a movie." Someone loudly whispered, making a few others laugh. 

 Kari dropped her chin to her chest. Tears welled in her eyes. She knew those in the class meant well, that they were really just trying to help. But they were helping the wrong person. Why would Ivar not leave her alone? She told him 'no' multiple times, that should have been enough. Her tolerance for his behavior was waning rapidly and honesty she was not sure if she would fight back…. or surrender. 

 The chair scratched faintly on the floor followed by his footsteps landing audibly as he crossed the room to reach her. She refused to lift her head, her eyes squeezed shut. Not just to pretend she could not feel him standing so close to her, but to try and hide the single tear that rolled down her cheek. 

 "Kari." He whispered, the sound a caress of her name. 

 Still she did not move. 

 Gently, he tipped her chin up, forcing her to look at him. His thumb wiped away the evidence of her tear. It was those captivating eyes, the ones that could both scorch everything in view but also send flames of desire dancing across her skin, that met hers. To her surprise, there was a softness in his gaze, a vulnerability, that was reminiscent of the few times they were alone. As if with just her, for a brief moment, he let his guard down and she could glimpse the real Ivar. 

 "Go out with me." He murmured faintly, stroking her cheek with his thumb. Standing in front of her, his broad back to the class gave them a semblance of privacy. "Please."

 "Why can't you let this go?" She begged quietly, staring up at him. 

 "I told you, I'm persistent." He smiled, almost shyly. 

 In his words, it felt like there was such a depth to them she was unaware of. That he was confessing something to her in which she did not have the key to fully understand. 

 She sighed softly, closing her eyes for a moment before looking at him again. "Fine. I'll go…. But it's only as friends, ok? This isn't…. Romantic. Just…. Just friends."

 "Sure, just friends." He leaned forward and pressed a quick, chaste kiss to her cheek. "I'll pick you up at seven."

 She nodded, feeling torn apart inside. 

 After a lingering look that breathed a flame into her belly, he spun on his heel to face the women. "She said yes!"

 A few cheers and clapping reverberated in the small yoga studio room. 

 "I graciously thank you all for your sound advice and encouragement with helping me to woo the beautiful Kari. Wish me luck as I plan to thoroughly spoil her tonight." Ivar dramatically bowed, shooting a quick wink at Kari as she watched him. 

 She desperately tried to fight the small smile off her lips. No one could say that Ivar was not charming or charismatic when it suited him. 

 As he finally made his way to the door, he turned around just before pushing it open. "Wear something nice." He said, pointing a finger at Kari and then walked out like a dream where one cannot decide if it was a nightmare or not. 

 The brunette ran a hand down her face before shoving aside her emotions and plastering a customer smile on. "I'm so sorry about all of this. Let's get back to it. I promise it won't happen again, ladies."

 "Kari, dear, you have fun with that boy tonight." Ingrid spoke up, eyes darting to the now closed door and back to the yoga instructor. "And if you don't want him, let me know. I'd still jump on him in a heartbeat. That boy has the prettiest eyes, I swear."

 A few sounds of agreement echoed in the room. 

 Kari could not stop her smile from turning genuine at Ingrid. No matter the situation, the feisty, older woman always knew how to make her laugh. "I promise I'll let you know. Now, back to mountain pose please."

 Silently, she hoped tonight was not a mistake.