#'[person in hell fighting demons image] WHERE'S [insert other thing here]' meme. well.
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tkachukisms · 4 months ago
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wait huh…. did I miss something???? did he do a bad™️ or is it just bad vibes?!??
(in reference to this, just answered nine hours later. my bad).
no you didn't! it's 102% personal unreasonable beef. so, vibes. if you would. it's really less about him as a person but how he's grown to represent the team as a whole. like he does not deserve the wrath I hold in my heart for him and in regards to that I give him my apologies but I'm also not stopping. y'know.
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teen-titans-imagines · 7 years ago
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The Batboys As Dads [Headcanons]
Since me and @loudmouthwally have been screaming about dad! Dick and dami and such, I decided to write headcanons after she suggested it to me. As always: reader insert 😎
Dick Grayson
He honestly wasn't sure on being a dad
But when he laid his eyes on you, his daughter/son, he was absolutely ready to fight everyone who had any second thoughts about you.
Dick Grayson was ready to lay down everything for you. Even leave the mantle of Nightwing to someone else, because jesus christ, you were so important to him. (And still are)
Dick Grayson is a playful man, and if you think he wouldn't hit himself on the head with a skillet to make you laugh, you are very, v e r y mistaken.
As you grow up, there is one thing you learn about Dick Grayson.
Dick is a dad joke within himself.
Dad jokes for d a y s.
There is no escaping them.
"I had a scarecrow friend try out for stand up comedy, but the audience thought he was too corny."
"I'm calling the police on you for harassment."
Despite Dick being a silly dad, he is also very protective.
No boys/girls until you are dead.
Actually, no wait, nope, not even in the afterlife.
He will stalk you while on your dates, being as obvious yet hard to spot as possible.
Dick is the waiter, the random guy you bump into on the street, the carnival's janitor.
He's fucking everywhere, man, don't even try to kiss your date because Daddy Dearest will know. In a heartbeat.
#GroundedForKissingMyBoyfriendAfterFindingOutMyDadWasSpyingOnUsAftetHeFELLFROMTHEDAMNTREESCREAMINGBLOODYMURDER #IWANNANEWDAD #JASONBEMYNEWDAD
Despite all the crap he puts you through, Dick loves you very much and just wants the best for you, and that includes a happy life and childhood. He knows that you can lose a lot in a blink of an eye, and he wants you to be happy.
Yet, while he holds a superhero job, it can be pretty straining on your relationship as father and daughter/son.
Just know Dick loves you very much, even if he is a pain in the ass crack.
Jason Todd
If there is one thing Jason Todd does not know how to do, it is Parenting 101.
Please send help. He has no idea how to even wrap a diaper on a child, let alone r a i s e one.
Jason had to have Dick help him out a lot little.
However, after a while, Jason fell into a good routine after doing a lot of research and hands-on learning.
He totally owns one of those 'Parenting for Dummies' books but will completely deny any kind of knowledge about it should anybody find it (demon spawn from hell aka damian fucking wayne)
Spending time with you, Red Hood later. ALWAYS.
He honestly adores you.
You are his everything and if there's one thing Jason never thought he would have wanted until now, it is definitely you.
Instantaneous Death to anybody who even mentions your existence.
Jason Todd Will Not Hesitate, Bitch^TM
He actually snapped at a woman who said she could just 'eat you up'
"Yeah, well, we don't believe in cannibalism, so."
Jason definitely sings you to sleep, and is proud, even touched, that you will raise hell if he fails to sing you to sleep right on schedule.
As you grow and get into school, Jason is quick to teach you self defense.
And taught you that all boys had a contagious virus and to punch any that tried to kiss you or hold your hand. (Female)
And taught you that girls were the devils spawn and were to be avoided at all cost (Male)
You once got suspended for calling the teacher an 'asshat'. Jason was lowkey sort of proud. Dick wasn't amused.
You have a white streak in your hair, and when you need to be with your father, he will play with that lock of hair.
You and Jason are exactly alike, with some different attributes. But that doesn't make you any less of a Todd.
Your damian's favorite. Just saying.
Tim Drake
You were definitely not what Tim Drake was expecting.
But definitely everything he wanted.
If there is one thing you both know how to do, it's complain.
"Oh my god, I did literally everything the books told me to do. Why are you still c r y i n g???"
"...WAH-"
*slams head into desk*
Tim swears that if he wasn't a coffee addict then, he fucking is now.
No sleep. At all. You give him too much shit.
Jason thinks it's hysterical because you seem to be Karma in a onesie for all the times Tim was a little shit to him.
Tim loves you to the moon and back, but you never fail to irk at least one of his remaining nerves that still works.
P r o b l e m a t i c C h i l d r e n
Yes, that means Tim and you.
Did he give you a bath just now? No the fuck he didn't. Did he just clean the high chair? No the fuck he didnt, bitch. Did he just change your diaper? Come back, bitch. It's a shitstorm in here, and you're in the eye of the hurricane. Gas mask it up, son.
As you grow up, Tim wants you to get out there and do whatever. He's slightly not ok with you dating, but don't think he won't do at least 15 background checks, stake outs, securing the perimeter, interrogations, whatever. Each. 15 each.
You are a computer genius just like him, but don't spend your time on the computer all the time. Mostly just to play games here and there.
As you grow in school, there is not a single day that goes by that you absolutely loathe it.
Honestly
Why cant you just homeschool. We have the capability too.
"Who even needs human friends? Uncle Damian is doing just fine with his animals."
"He also has homicidal tendecies, so. You're gonna get some human interaction whether you like it or not."
Honestly, you and Tim butt heads all the time, but at the end of the day, you are his flesh and blood, and he will protect and love you till the world stops turning.
Damian Wayne
Let's be honest: Damian Wayne would be the most worried and/or scared person on earth if he found out he was gonna be a dad.
All these insecurities about his past, the bad memories, all of it coming back to haunt him as he thought about his child.
Damian was not ready at all.
He was honestly very weary of you. Since he didn't really get along with children, there was no way to explain to him how to raise his kid for the next eighteen years.
He realized that when he held you. Kinda like an 'aha' moment, but with an 'oh shit' instead.
After Damian warmed up to you, though, he was Dad to the Max. Spin the fucking wheel to jackpot.
Damian has very high expectations for himself as a dad. He needs to be on top of the mark at all times or he is sure he has failed you.
Damian is a perfectionist, so if he doesn't get you to calm down after screaming bloody murder on the first try, he literally wants to stab something because wtf he was sure he was doing this right.
Damian sings you to sleep. Dami has the voice of an angel when he's quietly singing and it's soothing as fuck. Never fails to make you sleepy. Add in a bit of bouncing while leaned against his shoulder and it is lights o u t.
Damian is a very teasing father, despite how serious he can be. You are the only person who he shows his soft, relaxed side too. You are his everything and he lets you know that shamelessly.
Damian will kill anybody who even dares to mention your name or make horrible implications about your existence.
That is his child and he will fuck someone up if they speak wrongly of you. Talk shit, get hit, bitches get a fucking katana to the eye.
Definition of the meme "Don't talk to me or my son ever again."
Damian Wayne Will Definitely Not Hesitate, Bitch^TM
As you grow up, Damian makes it crystal clear.
NO DATING AT ALL.
Damian is protective as fuck. He needs to know where you are, where you are going, who is going with you, who is all going to be there, how long is it gonna be, how long are you gonna be driving there, are there gonna be any boys present, Drake, would you finish the damn background checks already???
Damian is just like Dick: not even in the afterlife or the bullshit after that.
You are very much like Damian. Practically a spitting image. It makes Damian feel proud because of the Wayne Legacy that you might keep up, his ego, and the fact that his child is a badass and looks like one too.
Damian and you are not perfect, though. You two often get into arguments about certain things, usually the littlest. One of the things you two often fight about, however, is the mantle of Robin.
Huge no-no.
Noooo. No no no.
There is no way you are becoming Robin. You are his baby and he is NOT going to let some STUPID costume ruin that for him.
He can be very cold, even to you at times, and since you didn't inherit his amazing lack skill of patience, you are often calling him out on his bullshit and his attitudes.
Seriously. Who even is the adult here anymore.
You are taller than Damian. It infuriates him to no end.
"Dad, how's the weather down there?"
"gROUNDED."
At the end of the day, Damian loves you dearly and you love him dearly as well. There is never a dull moment between you two and it makes for a harmonious atmosphere. Even if you can be a pain in each other asses, Damian is sure he would be lost to the world of familial love had it not been for you.
You are his rock and he is your oasis in a barren land. Family always, always matters to you both.
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