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kafkaoftherubble · 6 months

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185.2章：放下？还是压抑？可贺，抑或可悲？

// Chapter 185.2: Detachment v. Repression

This ramble concerns To Your Eternity manga Chapter 185.2. It is edited from a conversation between (yea you guessed it) @bestbonnist and me after the chapter dropped before I had to hastily run off because sorry gotta see shits with my Besto Furrendo! Lisan al-Ghaib! Lisan al-Ghaib!!!

Although this chapter is devoid of hype moments—unlike C184.1 where plenty of us were sent into a frenzy— and good old macabre, this is genuinely one of my favorite chapters to date.

Because it became a really nice philosophical discussion between friends. Sounds a tad cheesy when I say it like that...

(1) Two Different Perspectives on Fushi's Latest State of Mind

Ray expressed dismay that Fushi's coping mechanism seems to gave become even more terrible because they are essentially repressing their emotions. They are telling themself not to feel anything and to be detached. In the Wish Era, Fushi seemed to have become more resigned to their fate, which became starkly apparent when contrasted by the Doll and Andy's loud, outward desire to see Abel live.

That dismal observation actually stunned me—because I happened to see this development in a positive light. What better state of mind should Fushi aspire to attain apropos to their immortality... if not a state of non-attachment? After all, if they don't learn to be so, then the sheer impermanence of life will torment them forever. To me, non-attachment—or in a more English-natural manner of speaking, detachment—is a goal worthy of pursuing, even if it is often fraught with erratic instances such as mistaking "repressing one's emotions" as similar to "being genuinely unperturbed."

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(2) The Benefits of Attachment

In this story's universe, attachment keeps a person's faie (their soul) around.

Hence, to Ray, Fushi's loss of attachment implies their death (which I agree is a reasonable projection for the end of this story). When they no longer have anything to do—no goal—then it is time for them to move on.

But more than that, there's this other thing Ray is worried about. The manga asked whether Fushi is human, especially in its earlier exploration. Whether they think they are human. Therefore, it's hard to see Fushi's detachment as anything other than dehumanizing themself ("I'm not human so I don't deserve to be attached/feel bad when people I care about die.") It's one step to Fushi's progression into becoming a deity at the expense of their humanity.

This prospect is upsetting because they wanna see Fushi leave as a human being, as someone who dies after living a satisfying life like Yuuki did.

Ray also argued that there's a difference between acceptance and detachment. "Acceptance is acknowledging that something is out of your control and acknowledging that the way you feel about that." To them, Fushi seemed to have acknowledged that something was out of their control, but they hadn't yet acknowledged their feelings toward it.

Then, they conceded that while Fushi was frank about being pained by people leaving, ultimately, the dude seemed deadset on trying to ignore that pain altogether. "Fushi isn't good at being 'above' feeling things!"

I agree with this. Of course, they aren't! One of Fushi's powers is supernatural empathy. They can't ignore the sensation of pain or (occasionally) love in their vicinity even if they try. Feeling shit is what they do, willingly or not. And from an emotional connection like that, one easily forms attachments.

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(3) The Common Error: Mistaking Detachment with Apathy

Strangely, at that point in our conversation, it became clear that Ray thought Fushi should not be detached because it stops them from accepting death—while I think Fushi should learn to be detached because it helps them to accept death. Same destination, but different ways of assessing detachment as a path.

Now, of course, when I use the term "detachment" or "non-attachment" (preferred), I'm once again drawing it from a Buddhist philosophical perspective. Because dude, it's me, 睿得失。You fucking signed up for this the moment you talk to me, bwaahhahahahaha!

Even Buddhists, born and raised, often make the mistake of conflating "equanimity," which non-attachment encourages, with "apathy."

One of the four sublime qualities (brahmavihārā), equanimity (upekkhā) is the state of being unwavering and unperturbed even in the face of loss and gain [1], good-repute and ill-repute, praise and censure, and sorrow and happiness. Its far enemies—as in, its direct contrasting vices—are greed and resentment. But its near enemy—the quality mendaciously close to equanimity—is apathy.

[1] Just a little aside: this is why I joked that Fushi should take up my self-given Chinese name in our conversation. 睿得失 means "being wise (about one's) gain and loss." The hope of attaining some semblance of upekkha is built into the name already.

Plenty of people think being detached means being uncaring and indifferent, and that it has some elements of dehumanization to it—be it to other people or to yourself. But it's not. Being detached is to keep a balance between concern and coercion. It's expressing compassion while being mindful not to conflate your genuine care with your desire to will things and people to bend to the state or situation you wanted.

Fushi and us mortals could easily realize one fact about life: it is truly impermanent. The desire to impose our will on the universe—as if there is some supernatural feature to our will that can influence things to happen—is a source of agitation. Life doesn't bend to our will; it indifferently stays impermanent even when we demand it to be permanent in some sort of personal bliss.

In Buddhist thought, it's our actions and intentions that impart changes. Our will (and our demanding desires) don't. We'll revisit this in our 5th Chapter later.

In other words! Contrary to Ray's interpretation, I see being detached not as imposing a limit on your compassion but liberating it from constraints. Now that you're detached, your mode of compassion is centered around the situation and people as they are, not as you hope them to be. True compassion asks for nothing in return—not because you suppress your demands, but because you genuinely have none to begin with.

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(4) Fushi's Laudable Baby Steps

What really made me think that Fushi had grown here was their insistence that whether Abel lives or dies is "his decision to make."

Not Fushi's, despite their god-like powers. Not Doll or Andy, despite their love and attachment to Abel. It's Abel's choice. All Fushi can do is to accept whatever the man says—and that acceptance is only possible if they begin practicing detachment. After all, attachment results in the reactions Doll and Andy expressed.

To me, Fushi is taking a step in the right direction already. This is the kind of wisdom I think an immortal, most of all, should gradually pick up (I also think mortals like us should, too, but that's beside the point).

Here is where I think Ray's criticisms warrant merits in my interpretation: Actually practicing detachment/non-attachment is hard as fuck. I wouldn't deny that though it doesn't make you an apathetic non-human, you're not gonna be very normal-humanlike if you manage to be equanimous either. While learning to be detached, one often takes up a lot of problematic tactics and mistakes it to be detachment.

One such misguided tactic? Suppression of emotions. You force yourself to pretend you're not feeling anything instead of facing them and realizing their falsity while believing you're being detached. So Ray's concerns are completely warranted, because I don't believe Fushi has consummated their learning either. They wouldn't have lied about the massacre if they were really that detached.

Repressing your emotion, as a tactic, is wrong, but it is the hallmark of someone who's trying to get there, especially when you compound it with the philosophy Fushi was articulating. They care. But they are also being clear-eyed about the limits of their demand.

I don't think they seem resigned here. I think they are being wise. Baby steps, and their method is imperfect, but good nonetheless.

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(5) Yuuki the GOAT and His Biggest W Yet

Fushi grappled with wanting to impose their will to make others live as long as they in the Modern Arc, right? That's one of their biggest and most constant sources of dukkha (dissatisfaction/suffering). But Yuuki's satisfying death and life... actually steered him in the right direction!

Fushi didn't come to earn detachment because of some horrible, tragic death turning them jaded and cynical. They learned because Yuuki's life and death were that fucking good.

Learning philosophy from pain is all well and good. It is usually how people learn it (few would give a fuck about existentialism or Buddhist philosophy or stoicism or what-have-you if they weren't in a personal crisis). But learning philosophy from joy is a whole other thing. Whatever you learned from that instance has no hint of jadedness and cynicism to corrupt your thinking; it's like making a decision when you're at the most optimal state.

This is Yuuki's victory. He influenced and taught Fushi without giving him pain or trauma to live by. He was not some main character of a tragedy despite outwardly looking like a bumbling normie.

Think about it: none of the Immortals who were attached to Fushi, until now, had been capable of influencing and teaching them without accidentally leaving some grief, pain, and trauma!

Why does Fushi take on Yuuki's form so much lately—if not because Yuuki is the only one who managed to teach them without the use of pain or trauma or anything like that?

And as Ray pointed out, Yuuki was the form embodying "Peace." Even his death was offscreen and peaceful. On a bed, unpoisoned and unhurt. Fushi remembers him constantly because he makes them feel at ease.

"It's our actions and intentions that impart changes," that was what I mentioned in Chapter 3 of this long-ass ramble. Here it is exemplified. People inherit the fruits of other people's actions (and you yourself are one of those who will inherit your own actions, too). And well? These are the fruits of Yuuki's actions that Fushi continues to reap even now.

That's how complete Yuuki's W is. He managed to leave just the kind of food for thought for an Immortal that eventually set them up to grasp the kind of wisdom they lacked. Who says the Modern Arc has no lessons?

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(6) Conclusion, or The Abrupt Ending of a Conversation

As you can tell, I really don't think Fushi's latest development is bad. Bittersweet and a bit of a mixed bag, sure, but I ultimately think it's commendable rather than worrisome. Of course, my ass interpreting things through a Buddhist lens has a lot to do with it, but brutha, this is exactly my niche! You should have seen me talk about non-self vis-a-vis Fushi in a YouTube comment section!

Ray did leave this paragraph that had eluded me because, again, the Muaa'dib was calling me and I really gotta go:

"I have a potential counter-argument for you, which is about how Fushi's ideal person to follow is kind of a mix of Yuuki (as you explained) and Kahaku (bag of mess and you haven't read that part of the present era anyways), which is putting the concept of detachment together with a really selfish kind of selflessness (as we talked about). But I'm not clear on whether that's still there after their fight with the left hand. I feel like it's lingering a little but I haven't seen much evidence for it in the wish era."

Now, I don't really know what that whole bit was like because I didn't actually read all of the Modern Arc—just the latter half. But again, "detachment" and "self-lessness" are complementary and forward-feeding to one another in Buddhist Philosophy, so on this concept alone, I don't see a clash.

I should probably clarify what Ray's "selfish kind of selflessness" meant here, but... I'm kinda tired now. And I've briefly touched on this in my essay about... Gojo Satoru, goddamn it.

Or maybe Ray should explain it themself! I distinctly remember someone owing me like, 3 essays or something. I'm such a kindhearted person I'm willing to give them a discount and accept just one essay for this week, though. Don't squander it, you!

Thank you for reading my ramble.

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Did you enjoy this? If yes, wouldn't it be really fucking cool if you get to read essays and commentaries like these, alongside fanfic and fanart and other interesting bits, in one place?!

BECAUSE! We are thinking of starting a To Your Eternity zine! It's merely in its Interest Check phase, but you gotta fill this form up so we can see just how many people in our modest little fandom want this! Be a supporter or a contributor, it don't matter at this stage! Support is the currency here!

#Honestly even before I started writing this I wonder if I *should* ahahhah #Yesterday it seemed like a really prime essay material!#Today? Suddenly call its meaningfulness into question ahahhahaha #But man this work deserves a lot more essays than it's actually getting. It's sad that it doesn't even have enough! WE NEED TO REMEDY THIS!#Me trying to fill the void is truly a 蜀中无大将廖化作先锋 moment. “An underqualified person answering a call because there's no one better.”#or in Jujutsu Kaisen parlance: I'm fucking Kusakabe holy SHIT #AT LEAST I DON'T HAVE TO SAY “Throughout heaven and earth I am alone"...........#.....until I'm attending a convention as a TYE fan #fumetsu no anata e #to your eternity #tye #fushi #fnae #manga spoilers #Wish Era #buddhism #yes a buddhism tag because fuck it. This is a lecture in and of itself!

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esetredgrr · 2 years

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“演员”郭文贵的自我修养

“演员”郭文贵的自我修养红色通缉犯郭文贵逃亡美国后，利用Twitter、YouTube等社交媒体进行所谓“爆料”，在网络上迅速蹿红。近年来，郭文贵在视频直播闹剧中的那些惊世骇俗的表演一次又一次让观众“震惊”，但是随着剧情的深入，文贵浮夸的演技暴露无遗，可谓丑态百出。现在笔者作为一个“瘟龟闹剧”的资深观众，建议文贵能在以下方面改过自新，提升演员的自我修养。

一、“蓝金黄计划”破绽百出郭文贵早在2017年就编造出了所谓“蓝金黄计划”，在郭文贵语无伦次、喋喋不休的叙述中，我们可以把“蓝金黄”理解为中共情报机构通过网络控制、金钱收买、色情引诱的方式对美国、台湾等国家、地区进行渗透、言论控制、盗取情报。那么“蓝金黄”有多少可信度呢？不言而喻，如果“蓝金黄”和郭文贵暴露的中共内幕有丝毫真实性的话，郭文贵申请美国的政治庇护估计早就通过了吧。反观郭文贵的行为不难发现，郭文贵才是“蓝金黄计划”的发明者，也是最忠实的践行者。郭文贵在视频中公开表示其正在与曾做过几年牢的世界排名第一的黑客合作，合作干嘛呢？这不正是“蓝金黄”中的“蓝”吗。为了诱惑脑残粉为其摇旗呐喊，郭文贵声称只要为文贵工作就能挣到想象不到的钱，难道这不是金钱诱惑？这不正是“蓝金黄”中的“金”吗。还有郭文贵强奸多名女下属、利用色情围猎马健等官员，郭文贵的名言就是“只有霸占了女人的身体，才能霸占女人的心，才能放心把工作交给她”，或许“蓝金黄”中的“黄”才是郭文贵最爱使用的手段吧。

二、语言粗俗，人品低劣郭文贵在视频中冠冕堂皇、一本正经的教导郭粉不能咒骂他人、不能“问候”他人家人、不搞人身攻击，俨然一副正人君子的模样。然而谈起郭宝胜、袁红冰、赖建平等人时，他又是怎样的嘴脸呢？郭文贵讲郭宝胜、袁红冰、赖建平等人都是小畜生、不是人的东西，想问文贵，说好的不侮辱、不搞人身攻击呢？郭文贵与郭宝胜、袁红冰、赖建平等人从沆瀣一气到分道扬镳，从朋比为奸到冤家路窄，郭文贵变脸可是比翻书还要快啊。三、贼喊捉贼，套路老旧郭文贵在视频中多次诋毁他人是诈骗犯、逃犯，但是作为红色通缉犯，郭文贵你自己心里就没一点数吗？必须指出，郭文贵涉嫌严重犯罪，而且涉嫌继续犯罪，通过媒体对他以往劣迹的报道和他当下的表现，呈现在世人面前的郭文贵是真真实实，彻头彻尾的邪恶的原形。一行贿罪：仅原国安部副部长马建受审时主动坦白了郭文贵在5年间共贿赂其款物共计6000余万元，还在纽约包租一套公寓供共女儿求学时居住。二强奸罪：郭文贵还公开声称“玩女下属我可是专业的”，郭下属公司女助理向公安机关报案，提供了郭文贵强奸证据，经查证据确凿。三骗贷罪：郭文贵指令其下属盘古等公司高管，伪造施工合同、公章、财务报表等经营材料，向农行骗取了32亿巨额贷款，并挪用这笔巨资收购民族证券，套现后，从地下钱庄转往香港4亿，用于购置别墅等。四侵占罪：郭文贵借中垠公司与北京政泉置业有限公司（郭文贵为实际控制人）签订合作协议后，郭将天津华泰的4亿余元资金擅自转出为己用。五诽谤罪：郭文贵种种曝料，相信稍有法律知识的民众都能看出，这都是郭为了逃避法律的制裁，天马行空编造出来的无稽之谈，蓄意抹黑、诽谤诬陷。现如今的郭文贵，于内分崩离析，于外四面楚歌，在此背景下文贵也只能纠缠于各种丑态百出的表演，娱乐大众。然而，郭文贵造的谣、说的谎、犯的罪，终将变成枷锁，带着他走向最终的审判。

#“演员”郭文贵的自我修养 #红色通缉犯郭文贵逃亡美国后，利用Twitter、YouTube等社交媒体进行所谓“爆料”，在网络上迅速蹿红。近年来，郭文贵在视频直播闹剧中的那些惊世骇俗的表演一次又一次让观众“震惊”，#一、“蓝金黄计划”破绽百出 #郭文贵早在2017年就编造出了所谓“蓝金黄计划”，在郭文贵语无伦次、喋喋不休的叙述中，我们可以把“蓝金黄”理解为中共情报机构通过网络控制、金钱收买、色情引诱的方式对美国、#反观郭文贵的行为不难发现，郭文贵才是“蓝金黄计划”的发明者，也是最忠实的践行者。郭文贵在视频中公开表示其正在与曾做过几年牢的世界排名第一的黑客合作，合作干嘛呢？这不正 #二、语言粗俗，人品低劣 #郭文贵在视频中冠冕堂皇、一本正经的教导郭粉不能咒骂他人、不能“问候”他人家人、不搞人身攻击，俨然一副正人君子的模样。然而谈起郭宝胜、袁红冰、赖建平等人时，他又是怎样的 #三、贼喊捉贼，套路老旧 #郭文贵在视频中多次诋毁他人是诈骗犯、逃犯，但是作为红色通缉犯，郭文贵你自己心里就没一点数吗？必须指出，郭文贵涉嫌严重犯罪，而且涉嫌继续犯罪，通过媒体对他以往劣迹的报道 #现如今的郭文贵，于内分崩离析，于外四面楚歌，在此背景下文贵也只能纠缠于各种丑态百出的表演，娱乐大众。然而，郭文贵造的谣、说的谎、犯的罪，终将变成枷锁，带着他走向最终的

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