#❀. no one taught us how to figure our shit out ／ modern verse | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

corvidexoskeleton · 4 years ago

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for ur porter gage ask post - thoughts about his illiteracy? his dialogue suggests that he’s not that well versed in literary skills. but we see the interactions between him and colter typed out on the ex-overboss’s terminal. whatcha think?

He knows how to read, he says it himself

“I read somethin’ one time. This here’d be what you call an “inappropriate workplace relationship.” Always breakin’ rules...”

As for his level of literacy, though, I think that when compared to modern day reading levels in the united states, he’d be around a 5th grade reading level

But then we also have the line “Was never one for book smarts. Never had an abundance of free time.” Which, to me, indicates that even though he has the skill, he’s never had many opportunities to refine the skill like someone today would. I mean, us in the US today read every day of our lives, from the internet, to signs, to the shit written on products, and everything in between, but he doesn’t have that. Sure, there’s the pre-war shit like billboards and food boxes, and whatever stuff post-war people put up, and any books that survived the war or were written afterwards, but it’s not nearly as big a part of his life as it is in ours

So it might take him a little bit longer to read through something, and I could see him sounding out words he doesn’t know or isn’t sure of the pronunciation - and hell, he probably does that thing where you don’t quite read aloud, but sort of mouth along to what you’re reading - but he can read

I think he learned to read when he was kid, whether he was taught by his parents or whatever kind of schooling he might have had. He would have had a few years to practice, but over the next 30+ years after running away, he wouldn’t have nearly as many opportunities to sit down and read, even if he had something he to read. And again, I think that while there might not be as much everyday stuff to read, there’s still enough that his reading skills didn’t get rusty, even if they didn’t get better

And then there’s the whole terminal shit. In addition to knowing how to read, he clearly knows how to spell to a certain degree. I know there are other terminals n shit ingame where you can tell the person writing wasn’t good at spelling, but he can. I think this was also something he learned when he was a kid, and maybe something he figured out from whatever he could find to read afterwards

Then there’s this line

And another line I can’t quite remember where he says he doesn’t really have the brains for numbers, passwords, and the like

But again, when compared to someone from modern times, or someone else who’s tech savvy, it’s probably true. Speaking from my own personal experience as someone who isn’t really tech savvy and maybe not the best at math - and this may just be me projecting - you don’t necessarily need to be good with tech or math in order to have the brains to figure something out. He’s a smart guy. Fuck around enough, and you’re bound to get somewhere

He didn’t just simply put a password on it, he made it completely inaccessible. That doesn’t seem like the work of someone who has no idea what they’re doing

Not to mention he got that terminal working for Colter

I mentioned in another post a while back, but I think that his tendency to sell himself and his intelligence short comes into play a bit here. I also said, which I still stand by, that I think he was the one to set up all the controls and terminals used in the gauntlet

Such as this one. Now that’s not to say I think he built the damn thing, but he knew enough to set it up and get all the turrets and that damn monkey wired into it. There’s also the camera system and the intercom system, both of which he clearly knows how to use

My interpretation of this apparent ability, his lines, and just who he is as a person, is that he is selling himself short when it comes to these kinds of things, but that even if he knows he can figure some things out if he’s persistent and patient enough, he still knows that he’s not nearly as skilled as someone who really knows computers and has dedicated more of their time to learning

Of course, I’m certain there are others among the raiders that have skill with these particular things who could have done them (I know Nisha has a holotape and a terminal, Mason has a terminal, and I can’t remember if Mags has a terminal or just a holotape, plus Dixie has her holotapes), but Gage states while telling you to plant a flag that most of them don’t know how to read, and I dunno about you, but the ability to read seems like a prerequisite to being able to use a computer, and the other bosses don’t strike me as the kind of people to just lend a hand

Another little headcanon of mine: he likes to “read” mags of the lewd and not quite appropriate kind, considering the lines “Lemme know if I’m missin’ out on anything.” and “That one have... pictures in it?” that he says when you find a magazine. Plus, he just seems like the kind of guy that would enjoy that kind of stuff, if it’s available

tl;dr Gage knows how to read and write, even if it’s at a low level, and likely learned when he was a kid, and he is also smart enough to figure out the basics of using tech, and he likely downplays these skills because of who he is as a person

#ask #blushing-ghoul #fallout #fo4 #porter gage #picture tag #read more

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curriebelle · 5 years ago

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Time to Rant about Poetry

I am currently thinking about 3 things:

1) a tag on a post I saw that said “I don’t like poetry as a rule”

2) a philosophy professor who told me, quite smugly, how studies showed that people interpreted sayings that rhymed (eg ‘a stitch in time saves nine’) as more meaningful than sayings that didn’t, even if they meant the same thing.

3) this part of this poem by aziraphalesbian:

I should be clear that I actually like this poem because I think it’s funny, and I kind of sympathize with the frustrated emotional energy in it. I also don’t know how ironic it’s meant to be or what the author actually thinks about poetry so this is not A Takedown or an attempt to explain someone’s poetry to them.

Instead I would like to use this poem as a middle finger to that philosophy prof. Mansplaining moron. (Thanks for the flaming sword, @aziraphalesbian .)

“Why do English teachers go crazy over stanza breaks and Times New Roman?” “Why do people think rhyming words are smarter than Regular words??” “Why should I have to give a shit about poetry??”

There is one answer to all of these questions: Form creates meaning, just as content does. How we arrange words is just as significant as what we’re saying.

(Also, as an important aside - when I say “meaning” I don’t mean like the Secret Theme of the Work and the Purpose of Being Alive. “Meaning” can just be something that creates or intensifies emotional impact, or even a hint as to how you’re supposed to read the work - as truth, as satire, as fiction, etc.)

So, form - how we arrange words - also carries meaning. When we insert paragraph breaks into a single line, it’s not a trick. It’s not an attempt to Deceive you about how Deep something is. Those paragraph breaks actually *create* meaning, purely by existing. Take a look at this but:

These paragraph breaks aren’t arbitrary at all - they’re *very* purposeful, because they isolate the “but”. They accentuate and draw attention to the “but”, and by doing so, they tell us that the poem has a turning point in it, and that turning point is very important.

Funny thing is - this is a principle that poets have used in sonnets for centuries. In sonnets it’s called a volta. There are different types of sonnets, but at a specific point in each type - either after the sixth, eighth, twelfth line - the poem will switch gears and offer a new perspective on the topic. Sonnets are also structured around a “but” - and that “but” is conveyed through form.

Hehe. Butt.

Also, the random stanza breaks are characteristic of a form called free verse. Free verse came to popularity around the First World War. The war was so illogical and destructive that it became impossible to see order in the universe - and so poetry became similarly disordered. Very appropriate choice for a poem questioning how order makes meaning!

Because let’s face it, the meanings created by form are quite alchemical - and very difficult to explain. A lot of them rely on established knowledge and precedent, for example. We know that the 12-pt TNR rant with stanza breaks is a Poem, because we grow up being taught What Poetry Looks Like from historical examples. A lot of good modern poetry - like found poetry or blackout poetry - is about investigating the assumption created by form.

Form is a tool used by all writers everywhere, too, even outside poetry. Lemony Snicket is fantastic at playing with form. He knows he’s writing A Prose Novel and what expectations that creates, so he does self-aware stuff like this:

And on that comedic note, form is great for comedy. Tumblr jokers pull that *all* the time - think of those beautiful calligraphy posts of lewd quotes, or that post that turned Thrift Shop into a sonnet.

It’s not that stanza breaks are meaningless!! It’s that form *creates* **meaning**!

And why do I give such a heck?? Why am adamant that YOU give a heck??

First off, to keep our egos under control. I’m sorry, Mr. Philosophy Prof, but you are far from the first person to question the meaning of poetic form. I really love people like the noetry poem’s author, who investigate and challenge poetry’s capacity for meaning, and where it comes from, and how. I am *afraid* of people who dismiss poetry as just meaningless nonsense that people only Pretend is Deep because the words are arranged all pretty.

Secondly - and this is why I say I’m *afraid* - is because this attitude of “fneh fneh it’s all meaningless gilding, you only think it’s important because the stanza breaks tricked you” - puts major blinders on the way that form can be emotionally impactful - and even manipulative! Statements *are* more meaningful to us when they are constructed carefully. You know - like advertising slogans. Or recruitment posters. Or pledges of allegiance. Or headlines. If you aren’t aware of how form can be used to create meaning - and create Authority - you can be taken in by it.

Finally - and this is why I find the attitude not just dangerous but heartbreaking - this kind of artistic nihilism is really unhealthy for us. For our souls, I think.

The only poem that has ever made me cry is Keats’s “When I Have Fears”. It’s a short sonnet about Keats - who was already dying when he wrote it - and his fear that he wouldn’t be able to record all the ideas he had before he died. It’s only fourteen lines but it’s overstuffed with these unbelievably beautiful images. I don’t think reading it would have hurt so much if it wasn’t a sonnet, because the brevity reflects the brevity of Keats’s life, and the strict organization of the sonnet makes me think of him madly packing away every idea he can, sorting his thoughts in sheer paralyzed panic.

And I think about it a lot because it’s one of those poems that keeps me alive. We have things left to make, you and I, and leaving before they are done would be a tragedy.

There’s also a wonderful comic going around right now reinterpreting Mary Elizabeth Frye’s “Do Not Stand at my Grave and Weep” from the perspective of a transman coming out to his mother. And because of that, the poem helped me understand trans experience in a way I hadn’t before. And now I’m going to think about that a lot too, because that poem was one form given another form and it helped me be a more compassionate person.

Fittingly, William Carlos Williams figured this all out before I did:

#long post #it’s my mission to get you all to love writing #it’s difficult and beautiful across the board #but in the right moment it’s stronger than despair #also @ the supernerds #I'm kind of conflating form and paratext here I realize #but then again #people tend 2 yeet them both #so

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asexualbert · 5 years ago

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JoJo De La Guerra

Modern College-verse Profile

-Lighting design major

-Best friends and roommates with Elmer

-A quiet guy, until you get to know him

-Then you find out how sassy he is

-Like Davey, he's a quiet snark

-Though relatively quiet, JoJo is not a shy guy

-He is absolutely not opposed to speaking his mind

-He's both willing and entirely capable of compleatly shutting someone down with pure wit

-A pretty good cook

-Elmer taught him a few of his grandmother's polish recipes and he likes to experiment on his own as well

-He's got a particular fondness for French cooking

-Eats prepackaged ramen regularly anyways because he likes it and is fully aware how stereotypical that is as a college student, not that he gives a single shit

-His mum was born and raised in Ontario and had him learn French because she found it a valuable thing that she'd learned

-He frenches with Crutchie

-A genuinely really nice person

-But piss him of...

-Just don't do it

-You will regret it

-He will destroy you with words

-Doesn't have a great relationship with his parents

-They weren't cruel or anything but they were very strict and had a lot of expectations of their only son that he knew he'd never meet

-He was supposed to get perfect grades and become a doctor and get married, to a perfect girl of their standards of course, and give them grandchildren and never do anything that they wouldn't approve of, which included what he watched, listened to, ate, who he was friends with, etc.

-So the fact that he wanted to work in the film industry, would spend nights at Elmer's house watching action movies and eating copious amounts of junk food, and the fact that he's gay all told him that his parents would never really be proud of him

-He came out at age sixteen in hopes that they'd stop trying to set him up with girls and maybe have a chance to get a little closer with them

-They didn't approve at all

-They basically treated it as something that they could ignore in hopes that it would go away

-Though he was watched more closely and set up more often after the conversation

-They called him more often, especially when he was over with Elmer

-When he turned 18, it was clearly expressed that if he was to "continue choosing to live this way" it wouldn't be in their house

-He stayed with Elmer until they started college and he moved into a dorm

-By the end of the year they'd found an apartment together, in between their schools

-He has contact with his parents once, maybe twice a year

-It's never very personal and always ends with the same type of sentiment of "We hope to reconnect soon"

-The "As long as you've decided to live our way" is unwritten but clearly understood

-Elmer's folks are more his family than his own ever was

-But he still hopes his own will come around

-For the time being though, he's always welcome in their home and they always show up to things for him

-He isn't ashamed of his sexuality but he's quiet about it, and isn't actively looking for any relationship so he figures it's no one's buisness

-He's not the most social guy and most of his friends come from Elmer, who just seems to attract them naturally

-Anyone who meets him likes him immediately because he's got such a kind, sunny personality

-He just happens to be more introverted than his best friend and doesn't go out of his way to make more friends

-Really, he's sociable but not particularly social

-He doesn't really like parties, they're loud and no one's really in the right mind to have an actual conversation, which is much more his style of socializing

-He'd prefer to stay home with a movie and way too much junk food with just a few close friends

-Really nice handwriting

-It's really tiny with neat lines, everything very symmetrical and tidy, it's quite satisfying to look at

-It matches him well

-He's organized and tidy and likes things neat

-He's really good at English

-Tutors that subject for some extra rent money

-He was raised to be a perfectionist and that his achievements should be top priority

-He's working on unlearning that mindset and focusing a little more on his own mental health

-He's doing a really good job of it, with a little help from Elmer

-Does generally well in school and though he's no longer a straight A student like in highschool, he's alright with that because he's not killing himself for his grades the way he used to to please his parents

Albert Race Spot Davey Crutchie Oscar Delancey

#modern newsies #College-verse #JoJo De La Guerra #Based loosely on Lane Kim #i didn't realize that until halfway through #but it's true #strikestrikestrikeday

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healheir-archive · 6 years ago

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@sageheir @biteheir

#❀. no one taught us how to figure our shit out ／ modern verse #shes going to end up saying this some day i stg

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onestowatch · 7 years ago

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Q&A: Meet Albin Lee Meldau, A Soulful Voice Transforming the World Around Him Into Musical Poetry

I first met Albin Lee Meldau outside the infamous Capitol Records Tower off Hollywood Boulevard. The setting was a far cry from his native Sweden, yet the historical legacies that enveloped the space served as an undeniably fitting place for the soulful star in the making. Music has surrounded Meldau since his inception. Meldau was raised in Sweden by his jazz vocalist mother and British punk rocker father. The two seemingly disparate worlds gave birth to a talent rife with an appreciation for the varied musical traditions of a time past, all viewed from the guise of an artist seeking to carve out his own hallowed spot in music history.

Meldau has arguably already began making a lasting name for himself in music with his captivating, soul-tearing renditions of modern indie-pop. The singer-songwriter's series of EPs, Lovers and Bloodshot, showcase an artist whose profound expression of modern pop music encompasses everything from soul, blues, and rock. Fans and critics alike have clearly taken notice of Meldau’s well-versed ability to craft engrossing poetry with his time-worn voice and arresting songwriting. The likes of which have garnered him over 300,000 monthly listeners on Spotify alone, a nomination for Best Newcomer at the 2017 Swedish Grammy Awards, and the first ever Anchor Award for best emerging talent.

Meldau has managed to strike a chord with not only the music industry’s elites and fans but with us here at Ones to Watch as well. So, I sat down with the voice and mind behind these spellbinding works to attempt to figure out the man behind the poetry.

OTW: How did growing up in Sweden affect both your own music and how you approach music?

Albin Lee Meldau: My mother is a music teacher and my father is a singer as well, working in the theatres as a lighting director. My father is from London and my mother is from Sweden. I always lived in Sweden, but half of my family is in England, so I lived months of the year in England ever since I was a kid. Sweden has helped me in thousands of ways. We’ve had a government that has supported arts and culture for almost a hundred years now. So, in every possible way–free music education, benefits for rehearsals, all kinds of shit. I used to be a busker and a wedding singer. Busking was my main income, and that’s tax-free in Sweden, well up until $12,000, so it was a nice little extra income for someone that’s just getting started. So, I was influenced in many, many ways. We have our sound, just like the Cubans, the Jamaicans, the Americans, or the English. We have our own thing and that shaped me into who I am. But it’s also the English side that influenced me. And the Jamaican side too. My father always played reggae for me and my mom loves Salif Keita, Youssou N’Dour, and African style things. So, I grew up in quite a weird, leftist musical kind of household. My father and my mother divorced early but both of them helped me. I played the trumpet and sang in choirs [growing up] and she used to have a tiny little TV. She used to lock it in the cupboards, so if you didn’t practice your singing and your trumpet, you weren’t allowed to watch the tele. We only had four channels anyway, so she was a very big part of my musical upbringing. I have no degree, but I work as a music teacher, so I’ve got to thank them for everything.

OTW: You clearly had a very musical upbringing. Was music what you always thought you would end up doing?

ALM: Nah, nah. I wanted to be a football player. I played football all the time, forever, up until I was sixteen. Then I played a Brazilian team and I never went back. It was easier for me to express my world and spread my poetry in this way. But if I could do it on the pitch and be #10 in the World Cup finals, I’d trade it for this easy. I live for, I dream about football. I’m a sports guy, a simple sports guy. I like dogs, I like weed, and I like football. That’s basically it. The older I get, the less interested I get in football though, cause it’s all about the money now. They just spend $220 million on a transfer fee, so it’s getting silly, and it’s getting to a point where they change teams like underwear. It’s not the same anymore for me anyway. Maybe it’s because I’m older, but I don’t know $220 million for one player is going to take his mind off football and more on just sponsorships. But yeah, I wanted to be a football player and not for the money. I just wanted to score. No, but this is the thing I do, and I try and treat it the same–stay in shape, try and work harder. Woody Allen said something really smart, Success is 10% talent and 90% being prepared and able to do your job. Cause you only get one chance, so it’s an honor to be here. It was really hard just getting through immigration. Damn, I never thought that would happen (laughter). But no, actually he told me I was never going to get this Visa. He was the rudest man I ever met. It was awful! He was very, very not digging me, but I had to stand there and get that bloody visa. The trip from being nobody on the street to sitting here, it only took five minutes, but it was a lot of work–a lot of things that had to come together. Yeah, I’m here to do my job and spread my poetry to the world. That’s basically it. It is my diary, and I don’t do anything but try to write music.

OTW: You often describe your project as a diary of sorts. Could you explain that a bit more?

ALM: Well, this is my poetry. These are my thoughts and experiences. We live from emotions and we make stuff out of emotions. Like, every word should be thought of. Shakespeare and them they’ve influenced me a lot. I mean all my favorite poets, everyone in the world. I know I can sing, but the question is can I write? You have to do both, and that’s what I’m working on. Life is a journey, man. Music isn’t a competition, but life is a struggle. We got to remember that. We want flesh; we all have our own problems. It doesn’t matter. I just have a vent. And I’m so happy for that, cause if I didn’t have that vent, I’d be fucked. I’d be on the streets. So, this is a diary. It’s what I do now. You can’t take it too seriously. You’ve got to have a distance with everything. It’s hard. Yesterday, I did a bloody session with Diplo, and the day before that I did a session with Scott Storch. When people walk in bling and smoking dabs for five-hundred dollars in a day, crazy shit happens to me now. You have to keep a distance and keep on working. That’s what you do. Don’t let it get to you. People are all flesh, man. They are great geniuses, but they’re also hard workers. You can’t be anywhere if you don’t work harder than everyone else, and that’s what I’ve learned. And this is the thing about America, people here, they grind. They work seven days a week, and they fucking get their shit done. Cause there’s competition, and there’s always competition. Everywhere. So competitive, it’s ridiculous. That’s something I really like about America, because competition is a good thing. If you don’t like that, well, go back to Sweden and just hide. But yeah, I’m honored, man. You have to pinch yourself every day. Remember that you need to spend more time on your work, the better it goes. No partying–well I’m not saying no partying, but what I am saying is that the majority of things you do shouldn’t be shaking hands. What you should do, is just fucking keep on doing your shit. That’s important for me, to be able to do my stuff. I don’t mind going around, shaking hands, cause that’s what you need to do, but if I have a session with someone that’s where we make our gold.

Someone told me quite early on, someone really famous, he told me there’s only two rules in this business. First, is to write a good song, and the second rule is to follow the first one. So, that’s the only thing that’s going to matter in the end. And I need to remember that. It’s mind-blowing shit, but you can’t let it affect you in that way. I’m half-beyond twenty-nine this year, and soon to be thirty years old. If I was twenty-two and went into Scott Storch’s house, I’d get fucked on the dabs and no song would come out of that, so it’s the little things. Wax on, wax off. Do your shit. Come prepared. Boring ass shit. People ask me all the time, “tell me something fun, tell me something fun.” Well, I can tell you that you need to prepare and you can’t just come there and think that it’s going to be fun. It’s not going to be fucking fun; it’s going to be a lot of hard work and more, more, more work all the time. That’s the biggest lie–that people think with success and money comes less obligations. That’s bullshit. It gives you a stomachache, doesn’t it? I’m just happy on every level that I can continue to do my shit, and that’s the most important thing for me. Cause I don’t want my diary to be about rooftops–it’s not fucking interesting, you know what I mean? So, that’s what I try and do, keep it real with what we do. Remember, my friends back home they can’t pay the bills, with terrible addictions, and terrible life stories and shit happens. And I need to keep in touch with that shit. A good poet sees and hears not the big man but the little man, and the little man got a story to tell.

OTW: Would you say you actively transform the world around you into your poetry?

ALM: Yeah, that’s what it is. It can be anything. It can be a snowflake falling. It can be motionless sound of anything. It’s just emotion. Yeah, you just have to, like a filter, like a machine, take everything I see and put it into something.

OTW: When did you write your first ever song?

ALM: My mom taught me how to do pop productions very young. I had a band from the age of eight, playing with all her favorite students. I wasn’t popular in school (laughter). My mom was the teacher, I got the best grades all the time, and I was playing the trumpet all the time. So the first song I ever wrote, I was eleven. She used to do these little shows in school where we could play, and I started playing youth halls very young, then I had a few years where I only played football. And then I started doing music again, as soon as I wanted a girlfriend.

OTW: Did it help you get a girlfriend?

ALM: Oh, yes. I’m shit at everything but cooking and playing music.

OTW: Girls do love that.

ALM: They can’t be asked to cook. So they’re like, “why don’t you cook me something?” I was going to cook anyway (laughter). So, cooking is what I do, and I play music, so that’s why I got into both. Well, now cooking I got into because I wanted good food, and I couldn’t afford to buy it in the restaurants. Yeah, so that was actually why I started to learn twelve-bar blues or try to play solos–cause I wanted to impress some girl I wanted at the time. One of my favorite footballers, he’s called Peter Crouch, they asked him, “What would you be if you weren’t a footballer?” And he said, “I’d be a virgin” (laughter). I’m not saying it’d be that bad, but I am saying it’d be pretty fucking awful. If I didn’t play music, I’d be fucked. I can stand in line for a few hours, not forty hours a week. I’d get bored and forget about it, just stand there singing and get fired eventually. Yeah, but if I didn’t do this, I’d be a music teacher.

OTW: You’d be a music teacher?

ALM: Yeah, cause I can do that. I know I can. I’ve been with my mom in this classroom for all my life, and I took over for her for six months, and I’m going to work as a music teacher when I get back to Sweden. I’m going to give it back to the kids. That society has made me. Kids are funny, man. I realize the better it goes, the harder it is to keep them quiet. Like, the only thing they’re going to ask about is Scott Storch and Diplo. I’ve got to keep them in order and that gets harder and harder if I’m on the television, so I’ve got to enjoy it while it lasts. It’s a good job.

OTW: What’s been the most surreal part of your career thus far?

ALM: You know, there’s more people listening to my music then there is in my country. So, I have millions and millions of streams. I get to do all kinds of wonderful things, but what really, really amazes me is that people listen to my shit. They don’t know who I am, but they’ve heard it. That’s the biggest thing. It’s thanks to all the wonderful people here; it’s thanks to my team. I’m just a megaphone; I just want everyone to hear me. We are exhibitionists, we want to tell people our story. I mean I’ve met some fucking amazing people, and I have fans who have produced David Bowie’s records, so that’s amazing. But to hear a child sing your song, realize it’s you and then freak out that’s even bigger cause children don’t lie. They can’t. People in general, they like it. They’re fans. I meet them all over the place all the time, and that’s amazing. Scott Stroch was fucking epic though! Yeah, but all that name-dropping business–I’m a Swede, we don’t do that shit, and I’m not very Swedish so I can do just a little bit of it (laughter).

The most epic thing that happened to me–I was with my ex-missus, and it was a shit day. I knew it was over with. We were walking down Oxford Street in London, and I was going from session to session, station to station. I looked there next to me, and to the next of me is Alexis Sánchez. Alexis Sánchez won the Chile South American Cup twice, he’s played for Barcelona, and he’s the biggest Arsenal player we have now. I’m like fuck there’s Alexis Sánchez in the middle of the street for no reason, and he just walked off. I’m like, “it can’t have been,” so I started chasing him, and I was running and he got scared so he started running a bit. So, his bodyguard came and was like what do you want? And I started screaming the place down and he was laughing and he left. So, if I wouldn’t have had a session that day, I wouldn’t have met the biggest Arsenal player we had at the time. I’m a sports guy and that was due to a gig or a session I was going to have. I’ve never felt that honored to shake a hand.

OTW: On the subject of your songs, I love the song and story of how the song “Lovers” came to be. Would you mind sharing that story?

ALM: Yeah! “Lovers” is a reggae song from the late ‘70s. My father lived in London, and they had a reggae band. That’s the only tune I ever really loved, so I had to nick the good shit and take half the money. Yeah, no, to be able to work your father is an honor. So, I get to work with everyone, even family. My mom is a wonderful jazz singer; I’m producing her new EP. My missus is singing on my whole record. I have a few little more things coming, from within my family, strictly root shit for my art, and that’s going to be fine dope ass shit. Yeah, man, “Lovers” is quite simple. It’s beautiful lyrics–that’s poetry for you. It’s wonderful. So, I wanted it to be a big ass thing with a lot of ambiance on it and slow it down. I just tried it, and it fucking worked. That’s what I do. When you get to work with big ass people, it’s more like an addition. You get one layover to do something and you’ve got to pull that off. But when I’m back in my hometown, I’ve got a whole week, or a month, or a year, or a lifetime. “Lou Lou” and “Lovers” were both written under those circumstances. There’s something in the air in Sweden, something with the northern lights, we have a different ambiance. There’s a lot of Norway and Swedish acts that are doing greats with that ambiance I’m talking about. It’s like if the northern lights were a sound, and the vibe of it is very hard to get. I work a lot in London, I work a lot in New York, and I work a lot in LA. Most of the shit, I do all my recordings in Sweden. It’s home. We do well. Sweden has one of the biggest music exports in the world, Max Martin and shit. They’ve got it all. If you can make it there, you can make it here, you can make it all over the world.

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OTW: You guys did have ABBA, arguably one of the biggest pop groups of all time.

ALM: Yeah, it’s number three in the world of all time. To this day, they sell the most records of anyone in Australia, but they invented pop music. They own everything, they started this shit. It would be an honor to meet them. They do some epic things, like “Dancing Queen” that is a great song. I’m a reggae fan and a blues fan, but I listen to everything. I was listening to Eurythmics the other day. It came out in ’83 and it sounds so fresh, it could have been released today. Yeah man, just listen to everything, try to grasp everything, get emotions out of anything.

OTW: As far as music upbringings, your dad was more of a punk rocker than your mom–

ALM: They were both punk rockers, but in London and Sweden punk is very different. Punk came to England first, so the Swedes got it ten years later. The English punk isn’t as political in the same way, it’s more about smashing people over the head with a fucking bottle. Swedish punk is the same, but it’s much more leftist and super political. It’s more like prog music, but yeah they had the green hair and shit.

OTW: So, what made you decide to immerse yourself in the world of pop, as opposed to punk or jazz?

ALM: I’ve done jazz, blues, and roots for all my life. Like I said, I want people to know me, look at me, and like me at the same time. And if you play a very small genre, it might happen. But why did I start this? I wanted to get my old girlfriend back. That wasn’t going to happen. She left me, cause I was a bum. And I just said, well, I’ll get my own superstar and get on the silver screen, so that’s how it started. What I do is pop music, but it’s very broad. If you listen to “Persistence,” someone called it spaghetti western, and I fucking like that compliment. Then I do something with Diplo and Scott Storch, it’s totally different, but it’s all within this boundary of Afro-music. Even Black Sabbath is Afro-music. It’s all African beat and drums. I’ve done a lot of classical music, and that’s not African music. That’s 14th century up until now. All the bits and pieces just assembling together, and I’m not racist when it comes to sounds. Some things I don’t like, I’ll say that’s not my cup of my tea, but I’ll fuck with the artists. I’m going to do my job until I’m rich enough to just do reggae, but that’s different. What even is pop music? Popular music. The Beatles are pop music. I’d say Louis Armstrong is pop music, so why wouldn’t I want to do it. Also, I’m getting older. I got to do shit. I can’t just be hanging around. Like I said, the old one left me for being a bum, and that’s not going to happen again. Last time that ever happens. So, that’s it. That’s why. This is my education, this is my job, this is what I do. So, I could at least work as hard as anyone else or harder. My friends get to be doctors, lawyers, and architects, and they get kids and houses, I want that. I don’t want to be sitting with my guitar in a bar like in forty years, which could easily happen. I’m not out the danger zone yet.

OTW: How is work on the debut album coming along?

ALM: It’s coming, mixing it now. I’ve got something more, but still going with shit loads of work. And that’s an honor. Like I said, when I get back [to Sweden], I’ll get the strings and the brass and do my mom’s record, and then I’ll do my girlfriend’s record. Just going to see what I can get, start working on my Swedish roster.

OTW: So, how would you ultimately go about defining success for yourself as an artist?

ALM: Damn that’s a hard one. It’s not materialistic. Cause who loves a woman more than the oceans? This is for the Lord, but what I’m saying is everything strives towards the ultimate complexity. Like Quincy Jones said one good thing, “we’re not here to chase dollars, we’re here to chase goosebumps.” He managed to do that, and that’s the goal with music–to make it as good as possible. Just like football, just like any sport, I want to score as many goals as possible, I want to get the title, I want to see how good I can become. Not because I want the statue, just because I want to see if I can do it. Success is when I get goosebumps from myself, and other people agree. That’s success.

It’s a very hard question. Someone who says money wouldn’t be here. It doesn’t hurt to have money, but if you do it for the money, then I think the goosebumps will disappear. It’s got to be purely for the soul, purely you. I choose to turn to the utmost complexities, the Lord, the universe, or whatever you want to call it, but life itself slides towards the utmost complexities, doesn’t it? The really successful acts or producers that I’ve met, like my favorite that’s I’ve ever got to work with is Tony Visconti. I’m proud to say he’s a fan and a friend. He did all David Bowie shit, Thin Lizzy, he is the fucking producer. He takes time to listen to everything that everybody sends him, cause he wants to. He doesn’t need to and he just listens to everything to see if he finds something that gives him goosebumps. He takes time for everybody, why wouldn’t you? That’s the biggest, baddest shit I’ve ever heard. “Ziggy Stardust” that’s the album. What can I tell you? Just keep on working. Dreams do come true if you work hard enough. Like I said, 90% is getting here on time and being prepared to do my fucking work. It’s such a boring answer, but if kids want to drink, they better get some knockout punches first. People looked stoned, but they’re not. They’re cunning music businessmen. If you get the chance, don’t fuck it up being stoned, or lazy or ignorant. I’ve been close a few times. Don’t think you can write a song in a day. So that’s basically it mate. Never give up and spend more time on your craft than on bullshit.

OTW: Is there anything else you wanted to mention?

ALM: Yeah, yeah, one thing. To all you wonderful people who are listening to my music, I love you all dearly, and I hope to see you soon.

Keep up to date with everything Albin Lee Meldau here at Ones to Watch.

#albin lee meldau #pop #alternative #indie-pop #soul #diplo #scott storch #interview

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violetsystems · 6 years ago

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#personal

These days I can’t leave my house too late on a Friday night. If I do I always end up having an escort. Some kid from the neighborhood in a spider-man hoodie watching my back. Mostly to the gas station and back. People keep close tabs on me regardless. More so these days than ever. These days are admittedly kind of weird and confusing for everybody. I was reading about the outcome of the Mueller investigation and it is plausible there was no collusion. We’ll never know really. But ultimately, Trump isn’t a person who particularly cares all that much about America. He represents something very real that gurgles and spurts out of swamps and cesspools. He and his followers unabashedly admit it. Some people even seem to have grown to accept the turbulence. Others like myself have realized the other glaringly obvious fact. These people aren’t particularly smart. The Bannon article in Vogue taught me one other thing. When confronted and put on the spot, most of these people would rather feign ignorance and run away. They’re slippery like that. But ultimately they are guided and fueled by finite resources and unsustainable behaviors on the world stage. And the obvious churn of the global economy has something to answer to for our bad leadership no doubt. Some might argue this was all very necessary. To demean and attack women. To promote xenophobia and stoke division. About the only two people I really pay attention to in politics are Ilhan and AOC. There are often times I disagree but feel engaged in a common dialogue. I see women in power representing very diverse views on a world stage. Everyone is watching us. I was reading about Iran’s “resistance” to current trends in American politics. I took to the tone of it very immediately. It felt measured. I’ve been thinking about Iran a lot in terms of cinema. Cinema has always been the most honest eye into culture for me. Chan Wook Park and Bong Joon Ho were the first people to introduce me to Korea cinema. I learned the basics of a language completely alien to me through their aid. In China exactly one province over from my favorite city in the universe, Jia Zhangke’s “The Platform” introduced me to forbidden cinema. His films were banned. He was a breakdancer at some point I’ve read. Banned films are always sort of an oddity. In America, it seems we are only attracted to the most shocking of things. Nuances and tenderness are always lost in a sea of words. Although Mandy was pretty fucking good for the record.

I watched the first part of into the spider-verse on the couch last week. I needed to be in the right state of mind to finish it. Truthfully, a lot of things have been asked of me over the course of I don’t know how long. Here it’s been a running record. A tally for the right people to understand where I’m coming from. And largely it’s been the only place these days where I feel like I have a voice. Voting aside. I started reading the Auge book on the super modern and non-spaces. Whereas years ago, tribes of people were more focused on creating TAZ’s (temporary autonomous zones) Auge says solitude has evolved into an important archeological fact. I’ve been alone for a really long time. It’s a dull ache at times and other times it’s directly in my face. The reality of it all. For better or for worse. It’s all backwards at this point. I’ve been thinking a lot about fog of war. People seem to think I act in tandem with some group. Like I’m some sort of movement. People exaggerate and project their fears all too often. All too often we react. Give up valuable information. One of the most amazing talents to me about models on the runaway is their ability to visually display a sort of poetry of form. That there is no real differentiation between the outfit and the wearer. There’s a performance in that. One displayed most eloquently between a collaboration by Merce Cunningham and Rei Kawakubo. An intersect of movement, design and the celebration of the human form. Becoming something else or becoming more at peace with the moment. Fashion and grace are linked together in our minds. Men’s street wear notwithstanding. Undercover introduced me to Nike through their running gear years ago. Before that Jun’s aesthetic spoke to me as a sort of disruption. A return to punk but not in the burn all your record collection and start up a label. I bought this sweatshirt in the madstore once in parco that said “we make noise not clothes.” Ironically years later, nobody remembers a thing I did musically. A friend from Korea in town only jogged my memory about a show I did for Seoul Community Radio. I remember recording it before they ever set up the video stream. They were friends of some people from Cakeshop. I had visited Seoul a total of fourteen times. Next week will be my third trip to New York this year. The streets are a runway out there. And the streets are always watching. And somehow I seem to remain free to roam about the cabin. Effortlessly draped in the same old shit with maybe a bagel from Katz and a trip to the Rick Owens showroom on a whim.

I’ve been running to podcasts a lot more lately. The last one I did was a five mile. At the end, the coach asks you to run for someone who really inspires you. It’s at the end of the fourth mile. It hurts. You push through and you think of that person. The other day I was skating near the train yards. Somebody ran right through. Kept pushing through unfamiliar terrain. Me deadass in their face with not much patience left in the world. And somehow I know when it’s ok and when it’s complete bullshit. Because I care enough to pay attention. If America in this cycle of politics teaches anyone anything, people will say anything to get elected. People make promises to everyone. But people always end up watching from behind the scenes. And you can’t hide anywhere. I guess the real question is what are you actually hiding from? The old “what is it where is it how will it affect me?” The first question people want to know is “why should I care?” Sell me on this empathy thing. You have thirty seconds. Shoot. Nobody has the luxury of time. Nobody seems to have an endgame. Nobody talks to each other and everybody is afraid. Which is why people need inspiration sometimes. Being a hero is something I read all too much about. I grew up on comics. It was only maybe last April that my dad sent me home with my entire collection. I think they were getting ready to sell that house. Either way I’ve spent a lot of my time revisiting and reorganizing the things I’ve been inspired by over the years. They always come back to haunt me. These days I can’t shake the things that inspire me. There’s too much love there. It seems to affect things around me lately. For awhile I think people couldn’t understand why I wouldn’t react. Why I was so secretive. Why I said things without really saying them. Why I choose my words wisely. Why I focused so intently on the things that meant so much to me without even questioning. I questioned a lot of myself in my back room for months. What it was that I was doing. The truth was I was sharing power. Because I care about the future of America. The only person I colluded with was someone I love very dearly. Because I care about her too. If she doesn’t know by now I figure the best way to show it is by saying absolutely nothing at all. Isn’t that how it works in movies. Then I pop out of the void of La Guardia and say some dumb shit like “i love you babe” vanishing off into the night in my dilapidated tech wear. I’ll leave the spider-man costumes to the pros. <3 Tim

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healheir · 5 years ago

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@biteheir / CONTINUED

She gazes up at the redhead. There’s a soft smile on her face. The sensation of fingers running through her hair and over her scalp was exactly what the doctor asked for. “I’m always tired,” she muses. Her hands rest on her stomach, fingers entangled with each other. “I don’t really notice it anymore.” She can feel it a bit now. Karin’s touch on her head is simply too soothing, but she’ll fight against any signs of sleep that try to get her. They’ve both been far too busy and she wouldn’t let herself waste a moment.

#biteheir #❀. it’s not over until it’s over ／ thread #❀. no one taught us how to figure our shit out ／ modern verse

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healheir-a-blog · 6 years ago

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@sageheir / CONTINUED

She hands the cup over with enough care not to topple any of the marshmallows over. She’s pretty sure she emptied out an entire bag of marshmallows just for this cup for him. Her opposite hand picks up a section of his hair. “Blue could be fun. I think you’d have to give it a few tries so it doesn’t turn out green. Karin might know more about that, although I’m pretty sure she doesn’t dye it? Does your cousin dye her hair?” Now that’s going to bug her for a week and she doesn’t even care that much. It’s not like Sakura is in the market for the exact shade of red Karin uses on her hair or something. She likes her abnormally pink hair, thank you very much. “But blue could be fun. It makes me think electric. Orange could be softer. But you’re kind of an outgoing electric guy,” she smiles.

#sageheir #❀. it’s not over until it’s over ／ thread #❀. no one taught us how to figure our shit out ／ modern verse

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healheir-archive · 6 years ago

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@kageheir

[ txt ] i have abooooout…. 120 yen. [ txt ] okay , so neither can i but here me out , movie night. [ txt ] we have had one in forever!

[sms] if you insist it’s at your place i’ll scream [sms] there only ever seems to be ramen in your cupboards

#sageheir #❀. it’s not over until it’s over ／ thread #❀. no one taught us how to figure our shit out ／ modern verse

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philaprint · 8 years ago

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Give Much Respect Due: How Female Rappers Inspire Black Queer Boys

MARCH 02, 2017

By Devyn Springer

It’s 2001. My mother opens the bathroom door and I am in my underwear, breathing heavily like a backup dancer. I have a smile on my face and sweat on my shoulders. My little ribs under my brown skin are sore because I’ve been shaking my hips from left to right for an entire verse and chorus. I’m looking at myself in the mirror and seeing myself as what resembles a Keith Haring painting; vibrant colors, bold lines creating motion. My mother lets out a small laugh, reminding me she is still there watching, and then she joins me in singing the chorus and moving her hips, “Chumpy, I break up with him before he dumps me/ To have me, yes you’re lucky.”

I have an obsession with flipping through my mother’s book of CDs and looking at all of the album art with awe until I find my selection, and I always seem to gravitate towards Missy Elliott, Da Brat or Queen Latifah; not that I am familiar with who those people are at 5 years-old, but because the album art has a curious way of making me feel something that resembles confidence.

It’s 2008. The Keith Haring painting the mirror had grown familiar with has turned into a small medium brown boy who looks more like a Basquiat painting, or a question walking around waiting for someone to answer it. My body feels awkward like my limbs and shoulders are a bit too big for my middle school being, and I am no longer the best dressed in class. I got headphones for Christmas and haven’t stopped playing Trina’s “Glamorest Life” in my ears since Christmas morning because when her loud and braggadocious voice comes crashing onto the treble-fueled beats, I feel like I fit in a bit more. I feel a strange confidence become me when I hear her rap “who you lovin’ who you wanna be huggin/ I seen her in your six hundred and you claim it's your cousin,” and I am proud of myself for understanding the first half of that line as a Lil Kim reference.

It’s 2011. The Basquiat painting feels like a Marina Abramović piece at this point, as I’ve begun to master the performance art of my own sexuality. I am driving the first car I own at night with the windows down, and Lil Kim tells me, “I used to be scared of the dick/ now I throw lips to the shit, handle it/ like a real bitch/ Heather Hunter, Janet Jacme.” I grip my hand on the passenger’s thigh, we kiss at a red light, and I say “Yo, you’ve gotta Google who Heather Hunter and Janet Jacme are real quick. Kim always comes through with the crazy references!” We laugh and pontificate on that line for a second before kissing again. I used to be scared of the dick lingers in the air, with Kim’s voice heavy and thick and a certain kind of honesty that is uncomfortably interesting, as I sit in the car with the first person to ever have sex with me.

They tell me all I ever do is listen to female rappers. They assure me they don’t think that’s a bad thing. They ask me why that is, and I explain how much I admire not only their lyrical delivery and dramatized personas, but I also love their performances of gender. I adore the way they help me, in some strange and almost inexplicable way, navigate my own relationship to the gender I was socialized into. I enjoy the way their gender within hip-hop, within their songs and lyrics, within their aesthetics, is politicized -- because it is something I am familiar with, and didn’t know how to express until I found them. My relationality to gender has always been one of having identities and labels ascribed to me, with terms and assumptions projected onto my body, and I saw pieces of that in the Black women who inspired me through their music.

Female rappers have narrated more moments of my life than I know how to explain, and have projected feelings on me I either forgot I needed to feel or couldn’t explain that I felt. When Nicki says “you was sleepin’ on me, thinking it was sumber time/ Now I’m a trending topic, lil mama, number signs” there is a breath of relatable energy that exists between us. It is in the way she openly refers to being slept on and openly discusses her struggles being a Black woman in a male-dominated industry that I am able to vibrate in a similar wavelength to her. The way that she is referred to as “difficult” for simply being about her business is a sentiment that resonates deeply with me as well because queer Black boys aren’t allowed to be outspoken without being “sassy” or seen as a queen. And if Nicki Minaj is slept on, her bravado simplified, her demands demeaned, then I can relate to her on a deeper level. And it is in the way she snaps back, reminding her ‘haters’ that she’s now a trending topic, that makes the inner scared and awkward queer boy in me go back to swinging his hips like a Keith Haring painting.

To be Black and queer is to have a strange relationship with space, or the lack thereof, and to have an even stranger relationship with confidence. The space that we are able to carve into this world looks a little different than other people’s. Our space looks nocturnal; night clubs, ballrooms, and dancing in our underwear with our friends to the newest Remy Ma song, grabbing pieces of her confidence and wearing it like an invisible cloak that hides us from the world. Women who rap, much like queer Black boys, manage to be both hypervisible and invisible at the same time; our bodies are sexualized before we have the choice to do it ourselves, and when we do own our own overt sexuality we are called conceited.

We can also look at the queer aesthetic often found in female rappers presentation to fully understand the massive appeal they are able to have to the Black queer community. I heard a friend say one time, “Nicki Minaj is one of the world’s greatest drag queens.” At the time, I was offended. What I assumed to be a transphobic remark likening Ms. Minaj’s appearance to that of a masculine figure was really a sly and subverted critique on the queerness of her aesthetic.

In reality, she is one of the world’s best drag queens, as are Lil Kim, Eve, Missy Elliott, and Left Eye, and several others. Drag and ball culture are such large parts of our Black queer community that you can’t help but notice the aestheticism seeping into the music video of Missy Elliott’s new single “I’m Better,” or the outlandishly early-2000s era fashion that Foxy Brown often adorned. The only one who switches a wig as much as a drag queen is Nicki Minaj, with the extravagance of a couture outfit and high-contoured cheekbones to match.

I am reminded of the artist and philosopher Adrian Piper’s “dear friend, I am black...” calling cards she would give to people who said racist or problematic things to her, and it feels that in this similar sentiment exists female rappers’ performance of gender and sexuality. As if through lyrics and aesthetic they are reminding you, “dear friend, I am a sexual being, I Black woman…” It is as if they understand the need to subvert femininity and sexuality into a performance, one that at times is even exaggerated, for the sake of the artistic statement. And because so much of the vitality surrounding modern interpretations of gender and sexuality is performance, the female rapper has the transcendent ability to do what only an artist can do: blue the line between sociopolitical commentary, art, and expression.

Whether through intentional subversion or simple fashion-forward styling, several female rappers have played with the traditions of gendered clothing and presented themselves as something far more interesting than a gender binary could ever allow them to be. I am reminded of Left Eye in the music video for “Ain’t Too Proud To Beg,” wearing baggie jeans and t-shirts, holding her crotch while she raps her sex-positive lyrics alongside the feminine presentation of Chilli and T-Boz. I think of Lady of Rage in the “Afro Puffs” music video, dressed almost like a biker chick, with her broad shoulders, dark and oversized leather draped from her body, and it makes me think of almost every Da Brat, Queen Latifah, and Yo-Yo music video I’ve watched where they wore traditionally masculine suits and clothing.

Plenty of the visual specificities in fashion and art between the early 90s and now have been influenced by this presentation, with women and other queer people drawing inspiration from this aestheticism. So, when we arrive at a Nicki Minaj, or an Angel Haze, or an Azealia Banks, or a Princess Nokia, or a Lola Monroe, or a Young MA, it is no surprise that they continue to transform and uphold the legacy that was established for them through generations of foremothers. They continue to be the fire-spitting drag queens at the front of a battle for inclusivity and acceptance in a cis-hetero patriarchal industry, one that often reflects the values of the Black community.

As a Black queer boy, female rappers embody much of the confidence we often aspire to and achieve. When Trina taught me to be the baddest bitch, I didn’t know that Queen Latifah had already told me I need to be addressed as “your highness.” When Foxy asked why “all the sudden all these rap bitches got accents too?” Nicki Minaj was ready to ask where the fuck is her curry chicken and her rice and peas? You see, it is in the way they demand to be referred to as a queen and the Queen Bitch, to be given what they deserve, to be adorned with the highest fashion and pop bottles right next to the male rappers, that a confidence so bold and unique exists and flourishes. They are able to embody a powerful, magical feminine strength that reads like confidence but feels like life being handed over in a syringe.

When I was the small boy who was still carefree and still had space in his chest for joy, Missy Elliott, and Left Eye were there to help me shake my hips; their music would bring me the movement and vibrations like in the Keith Haring paintings. When I was an awkwardly small child in a world that felt too big, Trina, Remy Ma, and Foxy Brown gave me the confidence I didn’t know I deserved but definitely needed. I heard Foxy tell me she has these rap bitches in a chokehold at least once a week. And when I became intimate for the first time and love tasted like sex, I had many Lil Kim lyrics that lent themselves to me.

Today as a Black queer activist and artist navigating the world through an intersectional lens, I’m able to see just how monumental the role of a woman rapping on the radio can be for a Black queer boy. I now have the language, voice, and ears to realize that it has been female rappers playing in the background of my life for decades. They’ve always been the ones that have given me life time and time again when the world hands little queer boys nothing but death, and they’ve always been the ones to be doin’ things that you won’t regret.

https://www.philadelphiaprintworks.com/blogs/news/give-much-respect-due-how-female-rappers-inspire-black-queer-boys

#queer #black #women rappers #rappers #rap #music #identity

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