#✶ writings

[balduri4ns]

🗨 @menzoberras | ♡ starter call.

there is a pounding, like a consistent drumbeat against the ears. it is his blood crying out for an act of carnage and gore. he turns in his bedroll - side to side and stomach to back and back again. behind closed eyes, he sees a vision: bare hands stained with blood and furiously ripping at the corpse of a young man like some SAVAGE ANIMAL. he wanted to believe that it was a bad dream, but the act of it seemed so familiar.. hands flex by his sides, hands itching to tear anything, anyone, apart. the hunger doesn't subside even as he jolts upwards and awakens. hands wring together as if trying to wipe away the blood that had appeared in his dream. it was concerning - this monster inside. none of the others had such compulsions to burn the world. no, that was merely his own depraved mind. astarion might like the destruction, but only if he's in power too. he doesn't not know about how shi'ndra or any of the others will react to these dark urges.

septimus stands and walks towards the lake their camp is near. perhaps the coolness of the water would allow him to shake these thoughts out of his head. shoes are taken off as toes dip into the water and then a pebble is taken, thrown skillfully along the surface of the water. it skips a few times before drifting to the bottom. so acutely aware of everything around him, he knows someone approaches.

a look is thrown over his shoulder towards them. " looks like neither of us are getting a good night's sleep. does something trouble you too? " he beckons them closer, until a thought crosses his mind - septimus could take the other's head and hold it underneath water. how long would it take for him to expire? it wasn't something septimus truly wished to test as he swallows down a lump that had formed in his throat. " i want nothing more than to know who i am.. but, what if i don't like that version of me? should i simply forget it and start anew? " musing out loud, he sighs as he looks towards the moon. " tell me about your childhood. perhaps if i hear these stories, it will help. "