#✝ verse i. // in the end you will thank us

[absolveres]

❝ don't worry, i don't mind stopping by and making sure you haven't turned full mountain cryptid. — at least until it snows. ❞ if there was one thing he hadn't gotten used to in the years since they'd come to montana, it was driving in the snow ( the amount of times he's been towed out of a ditch was something he'd lost track of the first year ).

john shakes his head, a quiet chuckle emitting.

❝ road trip? only if i get the aux cord, ❞ he replies, a teasing, easy smile on his face. he's most at home, most genuine amongst family. with jacob, in particular, there's nothing he seeks to hide. and while he doesn't want to hide from joseph, admittedly, there's more that he buries under the surface. he thinks the middle brother sees right through him, that his sins will open him to harsher judgment from the person he seeks validation from the most.

with the eldest, he feels safest.

following behind, he quickens his stride to catch up with jacob. ❝ seems like there's never enough time, i'd rather spend most of my time flying. ❞ there's a brief pause when asked how he is, giving a casual shrug of his shoulders. ❝ busy. seems like my friends in fall's end are getting restless. annoying, even.❞

"Mountain's where I live, can't deny I don't feel at home on it. Sorry I ain't been keepin' in touch with ya. Lotsa work that's been distractin' me."

A sigh and a hum. "Well, since yer here, guess I could take it as an excuse t'take time away fer a li'l while. Whaddya say? Family road trip?"

He was teasing of course as he looked down at his younger brother. "Y'know I thought ye'd try and fly yer plane in 'gain. Give ya too much trouble last time that ye'd skip out on it?"

A shake of the head as he started walking off, a hand motioned to let John follow behind. "How've ya been?"

[absolveres]

( @sacrifought​ asked: an eye for an eye, you know how it goes. / john wick prompts )

      John’s fingers habitually rub against his bearded jawline, a deliberate smile playing on the mouth of the youngest brother. It’s the Resistance’s misfortune that brings a chuckle from deep in his throat, aware that any promise his brother makes towards the sinners is a promise kept. They’ve tried to take enough from them, intercepted supplies, stole their outposts — and while John meets their efforts with frustration, there’s a quiet satisfaction too.

     For every ounce of greed, every ounce of wrath — John can return it ten-fold. It gives him reason to press them towards the gravel bottom of the lake, to let their cries bounce off his bunker walls — he doesn’t need the justification, but he craves it.

      Outwardly, he pretends it’s unfortunate — an obligation. He’s not stupid to morality, he knows when he dances in between and when he crosses the line entirely. How Jacob handles the recent interference is his decision and John may have done better to focus more on prevention than vengeance. But it’s too late now. 

     ❝  Sure. You know, I admire the fairness, but I did go to law school. So, I say you take two.  ❞

[the-al-pals]

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[absolveres]

( @whiskydeputy​ asked: '' i thought i'd let myself in. '' / john wick prompts )

     A breath hitches in his throat, guard up, heart jolted. It barely reaches his expression, however, though instinctively his brow furrows in concern ( concern for himself, because being caught by surprise is a dangerous reality ). He stops in the doorway, hand still pressed on the door behind him. Had she not been there, he’d have appreciated the warmth from inside his home, countering the blistering cold outside. He’d have been calm. The trespass nauseates him, but instead of letting his wrath get the better of him, he forces a smile on his face.

     He’s not the prey here.

     But the fact that the deputy’s in his home at all is less satisfying than it would’ve been if he’d dragged her there himself. She’s too close while he’s not the one in control.  ❝ Are you that eager to repent, Deputy? ❞  He asks, letting the door swing shut, shrugging his heavy jacket from his shoulders to toss it over a nearby chair. While his movements are casual, his eyes are trained on her, guarded.   ❝ Or has your pride brought you to my living room? ❞

[absolveres]

snowinabottle​:

𝐓𝐇𝐄𝐘 𝐖𝐎𝐔𝐋𝐃 𝐊𝐍𝐎𝐖.   they   would   see   the   lies   painted   on   her   face   with   an   innocent   look  ,   would   understand   that   she   did   not   believe   in   ANY   OF   THIS  .   joseph   would  .   there   was   no   way   to   lie   to   the   father  ,   to   build   up   a   wall   high   enough   so   he   could   not   peek   over  .   reading   people   was   his   job  ,   what   made   it   so   easy   for   the   cult   to   invade   their   minds  ,    poison   their   hearts  .   despite   the   mark   on   flesh  ,   despite   the   promises   spoken  .   IT   WOULD   NEVER   BE   ENOUGH   to   convince   him   of   her   loyalty  .   love   was   not   the   answer   he   was   looking   for  .   amelia   feels   her   chest   tightening   with   every   passing   moment  ,   closer   to   damnation  .   NO  .   it   was   salvation   they   called   it  ,   an   invitation   to   follow   the   family   into   another   world  ,   a   brighter   future   without   death   and   loss  .   lies  ,   stories   made   to   trap   willing   sheep   into   wolves   barn  .   SHE   WAS   NONE   OF   THEM  .   ❛    john  ,   i  .   ❜    can   not   do   this  .   too   late  .   wearing   her   sin   just   as   deserved  ,   no   doubt   that   what   she   did   made   her   deserve   every   bit   of   this  .   ❛    i   am   not   clean  .   ❜    none   of   them   was  .   tainted   with   blood  ,   with   the   agony   of   those   they   hurt   and   murdered  .   HOW   COULD   ANYONE   THINK   THIS   WAS   ALRIGHT   ? ?   fingers   wander   to   rest   on   his   hand  ,   deep   sigh   left   painted   lips  .   embrace   like   a   shield  ,   knot   that   tied   her   to   dreadful   fate  .   ❛    youre   going   to   do   it  ,   are   you   ??  ❜  

      John wraps his nervousness in confidence, buries it down, and crushes it because this is the only choice that they have left. He’s plucked the non-believers from the flock since before they’d left for Montana years prior. Joseph trusts him to fulfill his purpose, to devote himself to it. And John does.  But with the Reaping in full swing, he can’t take his time. Amelia is out of time.

      His best defense is that she isn’t a threat to them. If anything, she’s helped them, can still help them. And maybe, when she sees herself as part of their family, when she sees Joseph’s Word play out, she’ll learn to believe. John doesn’t fool himself or pretend that he could lie to his older brother. Lies can be second nature, He camouflages himself in lies, has since childhood. But, around his family, he doesn’t bother with lies and deception. He thinks his brother’s gaze would burn straight through him.

       ❝ I know,  ❞    he admits, hands from her waist move to her shoulders, inked fingers tracing down her arms, then back again, their hands meeting.     ❝ The Baptism will cleanse you... best it can. You don’t have to be perfect -- none of us are. ❞

      But they still believed. Therein was the difference, but John’s offering reassurance, rather than the worries in the back of his mind. She can’t hide from God.

       ❝ I will, ❞   he promises and to his knowledge, he would.  ❝ I’ve done it so many times before, you can trust me. ❞   But this was more important than those he’d done prior. While important to those who he led to the water, Amelia’s is important to him.    ❝ Joseph will be at our side. It’s a beautiful thing... I promise. ❞

[absolveres]

( @sacrifought​ asked: do i look civilized to you? / john wick prompts )

      The last thing he wants is to argue with Jacob. With anyone. But, mostly him. Anyone else and he’d have dismissed them, his anger would flash and he’d end the conversation as abruptly as it began. Because when he asked him to be civilized, he meant not to talk at all. John’s jaw habitually clenches, a heaved sigh, just narrowly missing a groan. The valley could be burning around him, flames inching closer — smoke suffocating him — and he’d still stand there defensively, as if the control wasn’t being pried out of his hands. As if he wasn’t digging in until his nails bled to maintain some semblance of power as the Resistance closed in around him.

    He doesn’t want judgment. nor critique. Frankly, he isn’t sure what’s going through his brother’s head in that very moment. Joseph’s disappointed tenor lately was enough to leave a persistent headache behind his eyes. They each have their own region to worry about — surely, Jacob didn’t notice he was the utter mess the Deputy had been making in Holland Valley.

     ❝ Compared to everything else that comes off that mountain? ❞   he scoffs, shakes his head and turns to slump into a pew.  ❝ I sure hope so. ❞ For a moment, the Baptist looks down at his own tattooed hands, idling, considering. He pauses a moment before glancing up towards Jacob again, annoyance still pressed into his brow.

    ❝ What are you hoping to gain out of this conversation? ❞

[absolveres]

( @sacrifought​ asked: i lost everything. / john wick prompts )

    Loss had shaped them, hadn’t it? His beliefs hinge on the fact that all of their suffering had been some kind of trial. And without purpose, it falls apart. He ignores the fragility of it, how easy he used to slide into helpless anger. The world had ripped everything out of his hands before he had a semblance of agency.

      ( and he wanted to see it burn in retaliation )

      The three words are vulnerable. Hearing them from Jacob is different from hearing them from other members of the flock. When they say it, it’s easy to preach at what they’ve gained. To remind them that with the Project, they have everything. Instead, John dwells on it. Losing what he barely had isn’t comparable to what his eldest brother experienced. When they’d found him again, he’d wondered if he hadn’t given up. If the world hadn’t already hollowed him out.

      ❝ Had you given up? ❞    The question doesn’t come from a place of judgement, because both of his brothers have a strength John himself can’t tap into. He has charisma. Bravado. Pure stubborn determination to dig his nails into life, but he sees his personal strength in a different light — a lesser light. ❝ — did you ever see what we have now? ❞

[absolveres]

( @blesscdbliss asked: “I like walking when the streets are empty.” / meme i’m too lazy to look up )

       It’s probably one of the few times John willingly walks through any of Hope County’s towns. It used to be different, when he’d first arrived with painted on charm, intending to disarm those he met. His true colors began to seep through  — toxic to those that caught on, those he narrowed in on. It’s easier at night, when most are tucked away. He steps along the road, dust covering the shoulder, dim streetlamps spaced too far out.

      Some night’s he’s practically deaf to the noises outside  — a distant rustling, frogs singing, the general Montana ambience that used to unnerve him just a little when they’d first arrived. He glances to his sister, a smile sweeping his features.  ❝So do I,❞   he admits.  ❝ When I lived in Atlanta, it was one of the only times I could find peace.❞    It felt like he’d lived multiple lifetimes since then. Since he’d been drawn to cities, a moth playing with danger, praying for some kind of sting.

[absolveres]

the moment he arrives at the gate, he's greeted by the chosen. he greets them all cordially, but the grin doesn't brighten his features until he sees jacob cutting through them. he returns the hug easily, but shakes his head when he pulls away.

❝ i had to drop off donations at the compound, thought i'd keep driving until i found you. ❞ any member of the flock would've gratefully taken the task from him. but, it had been more of an excuse to take the drive alone. time escaped him, the tasks of each day blurring into the next and he isn't sure the last time he saw his eldest brother in person.

❝ seems harder to drag you off the mountain, ❞ he jokes.

{ Thanks for the follow @absolveres!! }

"Well, I was wonderin' why there was a commotion at the gates. Ye didn't ring ahead li'l brother!" But there was a grin on the oldest brothers lips.

Clearly, despite the fact the visit was unexpected, it was quite welcomed.

He couldn't help but bring his brother into a hug, a laugh deep in his chest as he shook his head.

"What brings you up here? Checkin' on the prisoners? Just wanted t'see me?"