#☘ interaction ╱ keira florent

[conallblackbar]

closed starter for @pressedxpetals setting : lil yule chat

the night stretched around conall, oddly quiet, despite the festivities still going on inside. fiadh vance had begun to sing, and he had taken that as his cue to step outside for a moment, the biting cold clearing his head from the fog caused by both the drink and something far more melancholic. it always hit him at the most inopportune times, the wave of loneliness that had him separating himself from those who knew and loved him best. his fingers were curled around a cigarette he intermittently lifted to his lips, the faint warmth of the embers glowing against his calloused hands a small comfort in the chill. for a brief moment, it was as though the light and the laughter spilling from inside the room was another world away, too distant for him to touch, part of a life he had once belonged to, but didn't really deserve to dwell in anymore.

the smoke drifted upwards, mingling with the air. it had not always been this way. yule was supposed to be a time for joy, and for most of the day, it had been, but his mood had turned now, his thoughts on abigail blackbar. they had spent precious few yules together as man and wife before their union had turned sour, so perhaps it was silly to ruminate on this now. and yet, he could not help herself, the weight of her ghost pressing against him, as it often did, with all the complicated feelings that she brought with her.

the sound of approaching footsteps drew him from his thoughts, and he turned slightly, his gaze falling on keira florent. her silhouette was lit from behind from the glow of the hall, her breath visible in the frosty air as she hesitated, clearly not expecting to see him there. he recognised that hesitation, the look on her face mirroring his own yearning for solitude after being surrounded by people. it was what had brought him out here himself, after all. it stirred something in him - a kinship, perhaps, or simply the desire to offer her the solace that none had really been able to give him, because there were very few who understood what it was to be in their shoes. though their paths were not the same, there were enough similarities.

"keira," he greeted her softly, voice hushed in the stillness. his mouth curved into a faint, but welcoming smile, though it did little to alleviate the tiredness in his eyes. the years and the drink had carved a weariness into his features, and it was never more pronounced than at times like these. he gestured with the hand holding a cigarette for her to join him, leaning against the wall, leaving the choice entirely in her hands.

for a moment, conall said nothing, merely studying her out of the corner of his eye in the dim moonlight. once, they'd been the first of their circle to marry. others might have envied them for it, though they would not have done if they had known what was to come. now, they may as well have been ghosts themselves, the remnants of what had been, but would not be again, ach marked by something they hadn't chosen, but which had affected them both all the same.

"i hope i'm not prying," he began. "but how are you doing?" the question was gently spoken, and he took a final drag of his cigarette before dropping it to the ground and stepping on it with the toe of his boot. he wanted to give her the space to speak, if she wanted to, to share if she wished, but more than anything, conall understood the need for silence, and the fact that sometimes, the fact that someone merely cared to ask was enough.

he glanced back at her, clearing his throat. "i like yule, but it can be hard. for me." the second part was added hurriedly, as though to assure her he wasn't making assumptions. "all them ghosts rattling around up here," he tapped the side of his head with a self-deprecating smile, the confession coming surprisingly easily. maybe it was the late hour, or the whiskey, or the fact that she seemed to mirror something that he felt within himself, but he did not mind offering her that piece of him.

"is it the same for you?" he asked, gaze drifting to the horizon. "the way all the empty spaces feel bigger?"