#⋆ ★ 【サイタマ】 : ̗̀➛ inbox.

[1punch]

@dnangelic sent:

“Go, catch a bad guy.” 

[ PROMPTS ] ...  ▬▬▬   accepting !

A DEEP FROWN SETTLES ON HIS LIPS, what kind of attitude is that ?  If anyone should be telling the other off, it should be him to this little punk.  " Do I look like the policemen to you ? "  The sarcasm behind the question doesn't carry itself properly, flattened by his indifference and lack of tolerance. He's a Pro Hero !  His job is to kill monsters, not worry about criminals and the problems they cause for everyone and themselves. That's for law enforcement, and his companion here looks far from any law-abider. 

" Don't test your luck, Dark-kun. "  And don't test my patience.  " What's with your look ?  You're not any less suspicious than any bad guy. " 

[1punch]

Staring at his bald head. Sorry Saitama.

Accidentally stands in the sun and it reflects in just the right angle to blind you.

[1punch]

‘ you… you saved my life. ‘ i’m about to spam you peach!! but no pressure to answer everything 💜

@quietlyblooms

The monster explodes into a shower of gore that washes over the bald hero. Luckily the last ( and only )  hit took place far away from anyone else, Saitama alone had to suffer from dark blood soaking more than half of shirt. It isn't anything new though, he only stares down at it with little discomfort. He shakes his fist and heads into a direction to grab the grocery bags he's left behind. 

This time he remembered to keep any food away from battle, dinner wasn't ruined. 

He spares his surroundings a quick glance around, looking for any glimpes of injured or civilians still in need. But it appears the monster left no victims in its wake, and Saitama gives himself a little nod. 

‘ you… you saved my life. ‘ 

" Oh ... " He wants to find a good reply to the soft words, they dripped with  disbelief and gratefulness  in a way that took him back a little. But his eyes immediately fly to the dark marks on her shoulders. At first glance they looked like the blood dripping from his own person, and it worries him, but it doesn't take a while for him to register what they really were. 

" Your tattoos are really cool. " Grocery bags slip into his wrists, he gives a quick wave before heading off. " Stay safe. " 

[1punch]

slaps that bald head for good luck

SWIFTLY GRIPS HIS HAND and throws him into the stratosphere. " You're lucky you have wings. " 

[1punch]

Tragic… he thinks he’s lonely because he’s so strong but in reality it’s because he’s bald.

" Take off these fancy sunglasses and say that straight to my face. " 

[1punch]

@paraleech sent:

Follows Saitama everywhere he goes for an entire day.

[ UNPROMPTED ] ...  ▬▬▬   accepting !

HE DOESN'T PAY IT MIND at first, she seemed like a regular child accompanying their parents on errands, their schedules somewhat overlapping with his plans for the day. On his way to the market, among the crowds he blends with, around the shops he's stopped by, around every single shop ... and on his way back home ... at some point he finally notices, there is no adult that had this kid as company. 

His grip on the grocery bags tighten as he walks, needless to stay he became hyper-aware of her eyes on his back. He had plans to walk Rover while patrolling for any monsters on the loose, this might very well ruin them, a little too much of a hassle for a problem if you ask him. But ... 

" Little girl ... " He stirs around to face her, voice as soothing and kind as he could manage, which isn't really a lot, but he's trying his best. " Do you need help ?  Are you lost ? " 

[1punch]

@nvincbl sent: 

‘ how do i know i can trust you? ‘ :)

" Huh ?  " Well, he can't say this was unexpected ,  but the doubtful question  disappoints him  nonetheless. A deep frown rests upon his lips as he regards the younger hero, wondering what exactly caused the suspicion about himself. " Aren't you a hero like me ?  We're on the same side. "   Is it my looks ? Did I misunderstand something ?  

It takes Saitama a minute of wondering before he gives up, too done to explain himself against implied critism, face blanking  into plain apathy  as he turns away. " Well, whatever. " 

He goes on ahead towards their target, teamwork has never been easy to him anyway. " You don't have to worry about that, you do your job and I'll do mine. " 

[1punch]

@psychrs sent:

why are you dressed all stupid? 

" Why are you dressed like Calamari ? " He counters a little too quickly, question sounding plainly blunt rather than a bite back or anything snarky. It's just that he has been wondering, and it appears this is the perfect chance to get an answer. If she wants to be so rude for no reason, might as well give a her a taste. 

As for himself, he's dressed in a white hoodie with a happy green frog on the front, plain black shorts & new black flip-flops. It's comfortable, it's practical, it's NOT stupid. Her question goes unanswered. 

[1punch]

@psychrs sent:

as easily as i can save you in this world , i can destroy you . ( Tatsu, stfu smh )

Man, what exactly is her problem ?  It's like his mere existence ruined her day for some reason. Which is ...  fair  if he were to admit. His own existence ruined  his own day  a whole lot of days, thinking about it made him want to lay down and sulk for weeks. But besides the unappreciated and the understandable, he was NOT in the mood for another squabble with Tatsumaki's short tempter. He wonders if she'd ever listen to the advices he gave her, or if she'd end up breaking apart the next building that houses her displeasure. 

He makes no visible ( nor internal ) reaction to " I can destroy you. " It's not like he hasn't heard something like that  thousands and thousand  of times. Just the same as the monsters and bad guys claiming they could crush his skull or make him bleed or break his bones & his soul or whatever. But unlike their battles against evil, he doesn't find the need to burst her bubble of self-assurance.  She's a hero, after all.  Confidence, when experienced moderately, is one of the greatest things to carry into battlefield. 

" Save me ? " This, this though, catches him off guard. A few small insignificant questions pass through his mind as he looks her way with profound confusion. But he's quick to look away again, curiosities and surprise demolished under  a sickening weight  that falls in his stomach. 

He couldn't save her. He couldn't save anyone. He couldn't even do the most basic human thing and just die along. 

" From what ? " He asks quietly, eyes losing focus. 

[1punch]

😕 [CONFUSED FACE] - mostly intimidating (which only makes Inosuke want to fight him more :v there is so much power packed into that bald shiny head and it terrifies as much as it fascinates him)

" I'm not going to fight you , kid. " 

[1punch]

@blzzrd sent:

if you decide that you don't want me around, just tell me and i will go. 

[ PROMPTED ] ...  ▬▬▬   accepting !

" Is that so ? " Amusement tugs at the corners of his lips, mostly out of disbelief than anything else. A rich spicy scent erupts from his frying pan as a spoonful of black sesame seeds gets sautéed in salty oil. " Fubuki is usually a lot more stubborn, did something happen ?  Are you feeling alright ? "  A bit more than a half tease, he spares her a glance through the small passe-plat opening of his kitchen, checking if she actually looked out of shape in any way. But besides the short-lived apprehension, everything seemed fine, especially with Rover huddled by her side deeply breathing and fast asleep. 

What's with her anyways ?  Forcing herself into his life and singlehandedly deciding she could maybe leave whenever she likes. He may not be a real expert in socializing, but that's definitely not how human relationships work. Good grief, she's really just like her sister. Such personalities were truly hard to deal with, and apparently, he's lucky enough to be completely surrounded by such people.  " If you really care about what I think, then you should stop assuming things. " He says after a long nonchalant pause. People's wishes, decisions, emotions, attitudes. Even if it's about yourself, what right do you have to think for anyone ? 

" Oh- " The spices he's been preparing nearly roast too much, but he turns off the stove in time and moves for the rice cooker. Making sure to keep Genos' share in mind, he fills two bowls with fluffy white rice, topped with steaming cubes of Satsuma-imo and sprinkles of black sesame. Content with the results of his nearly-effortless cooking endeavor, he finally joins Fubuki on the floor around the table, setting one of the bowls in front of her in a silence offer. 

" Besides, Rover seems to like you. " A careful hand pets the sleeping monster dog between its beautiful eyes. " That's a good thing, isn't it ? " 

[1punch]

@kirakiras sent: 

“Saitama-san. About your costu– hero uniform…? Did you design it yourself?” She’d seen some very, very odd hero fits in her time here. From unstylish and gaudy to those who felt no need to partake in dressing up for their heroic deeds. But this one in particular, in its simplicity and bright colors, looked like a child’s drawn idea of a superhero... It could be considered…’cute’ in that regard. She wonders if he dreamt of being a hero even way back then. 

[ UNPROMPTED ] ...  ▬▬▬   accepting !

" No no, " He waves a quick dismissive hand, a little more defensive than he intended to sound. " I'm really not the creative type, I would have been fine doing hero work in my track suit. " Every once in a while he wonders how worrying over the look of a hero has never crossed his mind, how he never really cared. But then again, he's been too focused on strength training to think of ... anything else. But a track suit wasn't made to endure the claws of monsters and blows of battles, the poor thing would end up torn one way or another, every single time.

" A tailor gifted it to me after I helped him get back the papers of his shop from some criminals ... " He trails off, trying to collect the bits of his memories into something comprehensible, maybe skipping the part about some perverted wanted fish-monster-boss is the right choice, or the part where he got homeless after that self-imposed mission. But even the uglier parts of that time didn't stop a small fond smile from pulling at his lips. " He was really kind, his support meant a lot, he designed the suit himself. "

A year ago, he might have tumbled over and dramatically denied all and any relation between himself and that suit of his, even if he were wearing it right that instance. But he's grown fond of it, despite any initial embarrassment and critism for the design. " I get it if you think it's funny or whatever, I was so embarrassed I used to wear my track suit over it, but I got used to in at the end. "

I see a real hero in you. The old man's words resound, echo on the walls of hollowed depths. He's been lucky enough that no one has decided all this faith has been wasted, but it only leaves him to ponder in the void of his own regrets.

[1punch]

'cause i don't like you , that's why . // hi there

@speedsosonic

He squints momentarily, solving a puzzle in his own little world of mind. He couldn't have peace for just one day, could he ?   Well, probably.  A little force would be enough for anyone to get anything they want, especially in his case. But the idea is nauseating, and frankly stupid.  He would never go as low as to scare the Ninja away if he could. 

" Well, I don't like you either. " Emotion washes off his face as he stares blankly. Besides constantly trying to commit harassment towards Saitama himself, Sonic did try to hurt innocent civilians before.  Dislike is a little bit of an understatement. 

" It'd be very easy if you'd just stay away from me, like any normal person would do about what they don't like. " 

[1punch]

stares.

GETS THE CREEPS.

[1punch]

🍕 🎮❓

The device buzzes in his grip. King's message popping up on the shopping list he's been checking in his notes. Around his other hand is Rover's leash, and the little monster seems to be taking an aggressive sort of interest in another passer-by's dog. Saitama pays little mind to the obnoxious barking of the two.

 [  🐕🚶‍♂️...  ] 

Well, that's about as far as his creativity could go. Rover's barking ceases, and he's about had enough with the other dog, mouth wide open as energy lights up, ready to blow up something. 

[  an hour later?  ]

He hits send, pockets his phone and quickly gets a hold of his dog right before an explosive sphere gets launched. Saitama's grip redirects the danger towards the sky. It blows up, earning a few horrified screams and shocked stares of nearby crowds. Saitama walks away nonchalantly, muttering & berating the fuzzy beast in his arms. Rover blinks his six beautiful eyes, oblivious, then starts licking away at his owner's face, not an ounce of guilt ! 

[1punch]

❝ thank you for hair— ❞ BALD. pause. ❝ helping. helping me. thank you for helping me. ❞

WHIPS HIS HEAD AROUND so fast that the cloud of dust from debris & battle clears, grabbing the attention of some civilians whom were safe to evacuate. Eyes narrow, expression reeks of suspension & slight irritation. She did not just say that !  ... did she ? 

After a long moment of staring & gauging her sentence, he decides against thinking too much and turns back to the lopsided building he's been supporting, and puts it back in place with a firm, hefty  push of his hand. 

" You're welcome. "